#i can finally stop having a weird complex about it LOL

[mummer]

going home :’}

[mylevisdontfitanymore]

In that case, maybe this is a premise that isn't too complex and gives you more to work with but is still fun and interesting: either Bucky or Steve, for some reason one of them begins to sleep walk into the kitchen and stuff himself, ending up still being full in the morning and not knowing why, and instead of waking him up or trying to stop him or babysitting, the other makes him protein and weight gain shakes with butter and whole cream milk and ice cream and cake mix and acts surprised when they start putting on weight

this case

I think you'd be into this, Bucky kind of sleep walks/kind of has dreams about food and gains that way

I love that idea, though. Sleep walking to gorge yourself is so underrated! I haven't seen much of it, and I certainly could stand to see more 🫣

We'll go with Bucky being the one stuffing himself in his sleep with Steve's encouragement just because I'm in the chubby Bucky mood today and because

Warnings for unbeta'd stucky belly kink under the cut, stuffing/weight gain, tight clothes, weight gain denial/excuses lol, etc.

The thing is, Steve's a morning person. He likes to get up and see the sun rise over the tall Brooklyn buildings as he weaves in and out of them on his run. The sky turns such pretty colors, and it's endearing to watch his city wake up despite its claim - as part of NYC - of never sleeping.

So, it makes sense that Steve is in charge of breakfast - he's already been up for hours. He slipped out of bed while Bucky snoozed for a while longer, he sprinted through his run, and he showered all before Bucky rises to see the day. So, he might as well start on breakfast, too. Bucky won't be functioning enough to be trusted with hot pans and sharp implements for a few hours just yet. And this way, he can get up to the smell of food. It's nice for him.

Steve is all about the niceties in relationships and he would do anything for Bucky, but, he does find it easiest to just double what he makes for himself in the mornings. It can't hurt to make twice as many protein pancakes, salty sausages, protein shakes, fluffy eggs, and yogurt parfaits as he would for himself, right? It totally doesn't matter that Bucky stopped working out cold turkey after they both retired. He still has his enhanced metabolism. It just won't matter. He'll plow through the heavy calories anyway 'cause he's got to feed his hungry body.

And he does, at first, plow through. His body doesn't change noticeably. Neither does Steve's, for that matter - Steve is still working out, though. It's not until Steve starts being jostled awake in the middle of the night a few months after they officially retire, settling into a new routine that things begin to get weird...

That's all it is in the beginning, not too weird - Steve's body rising from REM to a light slumber every few nights in the middle of the night - but a little weird nonetheless.

When he half-wakes, he assumes Bucky's getting up to pee, so he drifts right back to sleep. Then, when Bucky's weight makes the mattress beneath Steve dip again, there's no telling how long it's been. Steve went right back to sleep! It couldn't have been that long, though.

...He didn't pass out while Bucky wandered slowly into the kitchen to mindlessly, unconsciously shuffle around until he found the fridge, opened it, and stuffed his face for close to an hour before his body finally forced him to stop. His sleeping body steering him back from the decimated refrigerator all because his stomach was so stretched it started aching like it might split open.

His dreams finally echoing the sensations of reality. Images in his mind of becoming a floating balloon, barely holding onto its string, about to fly away or about to burst after one too many bursts of air when being blown up. Or, dreams of becoming a bowling ball lumbering down the lane, about to hit a pin, and anticipating the satisfying collision - that heavy crack of his round body against it.

That would be super weird if that was happening!

That's not happening.

Steve is just a light sleeper, and Bucky's living up to his age. He's becoming an old, retired man who has to get up in the middle of the night to pee. That's all. (And it's kinda funny and very endearing.)

That's not all...

It gets weirder. Not too much weirder because they're both enhanced super soldiers with appropriately super metabolisms, so, sure, food starts to go missing around the house, but whatever, that's fine. They have friends over sometimes. Plus, they both eat a metric fuck ton of food. It makes sense that things go quickly - occasionally, even, seemingly overnight.

What's weirder than mildly strange food-whereabouts-mysteries are the clothing mishaps that begin to show up.

Bucky does most of the laundry now that Steve's picked up almost all of the cooking, and he swears he hasn't fucked with it so... why don't any of his clothes fit like they should anymore?! And it's only his clothes! Bucky washes their clothes together, so there's literally no excuse for just his to grow tighter and tighter.

Maybe his clothes are just envious of Steve's? Steve's are tight enough as is - really, they couldn't get tighter if they tried.

So, Bucky's clothes could just be catching up?

Or maybe he's mistakenly putting on Steve's shirts sometimes, and that's why his tummy starts hanging out of the bottom? A sliver of skin between his grabby waistbands (that are sitting too low these days) and his clingy shirts. Every time he raises his arms, his tummy is exposed. He wakes up in the morning, and his shirt has rolled all the way up to his pecs. He showers after breakfast and he struggles to jump and shimmy into his jeans. But then the day ends, and it's even harder to get out of his jeans. His sweatpants aren't much better. There's something wrong with that damn washer or the dryer.

Steve and Bucky have two different people come over and look at it and neither one of the technicians can find something wrong with it. Bucky knows the truth, though. And he starts to wonder if it's cheaper to replace the whole washer/dryer unit or give in to the evil machine's wims and purchase a new wardrobe.

Weirder than haunting machines with ulterior motives that will not obey their masters, leaving Bucky without anything to wear, are the sounds that start happening at night. Steve is a light sleeper, but he also finds it easy to fall asleep again - perks of being a soldier (one of the only). So, Steve wakes up enough to hear whatever the shit that is from other parts of their apartment, but then he falls right back asleep before he can get up to investigate. He's retired Captain America - he has a damn good security system, and someone would have to be a little more than stupid to think he won't be able to defend himself and his hubby even half-asleep and delirious. They're fine. He can relax and sleep.

Those noises, though, they're weird -

Little scuffles like feet skimming across the floorboards or drawers opening and closing.

Groans that might be the floorboards creaking (Steve's pretty sure the floor doesn't creak here, but both Bucky and him are pretty light on their feet usually), or they might be someone making that noise. Groaning.

Smacking sounds like someone chewing with their mouth open, lips wet, accompanied, of course, by chewing.

Whimpers when Steve finds himself waking up, especially late at night. That's definitely a person, maybe even a person hurting? A person really, uh, not hurting? 😳

The alarms never go off, though. Maybe they have mice? Steve doesn't see any droppings or other evidence of little critters, but that has to be it. It's the only explanation. That, or the apartment building is just settling - creaking and groaning in the night. Maybe the tenants above them are night owls? Maybe they're graveyard shift workers, if it is the person/people above them? And that’s why those noises are happening? It could be a ton of different things. It doesn’t have to be anything at all, Steve is no stranger to nightmares and those sounds could just be spillover from those. Stranger things have happened.

The weirdest yet is the new complaints Bucky develops as a retired superhero - a “normal” civilian.

First, he starts to complain here and there about feeling unrested despite not dealing with nightmares anywhere near the level he used to. He maybe has one a week, maybe one every other or even going two, nearly three weeks without. So, it’s not that. He seemingly sleeps fine, he only has those intermissions at night that seem, to Steve, very short-lived. Yet, still, he ends up napping during the late afternoon often. (Another retired, old man habit that Steve manages to find very endearing.)

Second, he starts to complain about feeling kinda… weird. Bloated, maybe? He’s a super soldier and has been for many, many years. He’s forgotten what tummy aches feel like and what it’s like for his body not to agree with something as trivial as food. But… his belly keeps gurgling. Like, all the fucking time. And it hurts sometimes, too. It depends on the day, though. Sometimes, his tummy hurts when he wakes up in the morning, gurgling and groaning, apparently desperate for food despite how bloated he looks. Sometimes, his tummy hurts in the evening, though. He eats like normal - big meals and big snacks and absent-minded bored nibbles from the fridge - but then suddenly his body feels kinda funky. Bloated or gassy. Achy or grumbling.

His tummy is just being strange!

Could he possibly be developing a food intolerance even with the serum? He's supposed to be perfect! Ugh. Why does it have to happen to him?

Bucky pouts enough - and his tummy rumbles up enough sound to keep fill Steve’s ears - that Steve makes up his mind to camp out one night. Really, the inciting incident is not one of Bucky’s belly aches with his stomach making itself known not only by pressing itself out of his too-tight shirt but also by growling loud enough to overpower the movie playing on their TV set that evening despite Bucky’s attempt to fill his bottomless appetite with a multi-course dinner and several helpings of dessert. The incident revolves around the creme pie Natasha brought them from a different night than one of Bucky’s more and more common belly aches.

The creme pie was special, something improbably smooth and light but still satisfying. Some Russian kind of pie that only Nat knows where to get and will bring back from her longer missions. Both Steve and Bucky eagerly were looking forward to having a slice, but…

It disappeared overnight.

And, okay, they both really have no idea what happened to it (even the pie tin is gone!) but Bucky’s clothes were looking especially small and Steve had the sudden remembrance of Bucky as a chubby-faced kid with hand-me-down clothes he was outgrowing already, standing in his kitchen absently, having wandered out of bed during one of their million sleepovers. Steve had to hold his hand to take him back to bed. That was the first time their fingers ever interlaced. So, it only happened a handful of times when they were really tiny kids, but Bucky has sleepwalked before.

Now, maybe he’s started again?

Steve needs to know, so, he stays up one night, pretending to be so engrossed in his book that he just can’t put it down. Bucky drifts off after a long while and stays asleep for an even longer while than how long it takes for him to fall asleep in the first place. Just as Steve is beginning to think it’s hopeless and nothing is going to happen, his imagination has clearly been playing tricks on him and it’s just his nightmares being projected into the real world, Bucky wakes.

Or does he?

His breathing doesn’t change. He just sits up suddenly without acknowledging that Steve is still up reading when, normally, if he actually woke up and found Steve still awake, he’d pout and whine and make grabby hands to be cuddled, simpering until he came to bed. He doesn’t do that, though. Steve holds his breath, not wanting to disturb this sleepwalk. He’s too curious to know where this will end up - better than any book he could bury himself in.

Bucky doesn’t stop at sitting up - he gets up out of bed and starts down the hall. After enough time, Steve slips out of their bed, too, trailing far enough after him to not wake him but close enough to see what he’s up to.

Steve is somehow both shocked and not at all shocked when Bucky wanders into their kitchen - he’s not even fumbling, his sleeping body knows the path too well, he’s done this a lot and it’s obvious.

Obvious in how his hands are certain as they pull open the fridge and find the drawer he wants for cheese and meat, unwrapping Babybel circles of cheese and stuffing them into his mouth and tearing open a package of pepperoni and swallowing handfuls; obvious in how he eats and eats and eats, more than just a heavy snack of cheese and meat, pushing through without stopping to worry about how his stomach starts to distend, growing bigger and rounder and fuller; obvious in how his clothes fit with the waistband of his sleep pants get crushed underneath his big tummy, curving into a smile, struggling to accommodate his fluffier hips and fuller belly, and how his supposed-to-be loose sleep shirt isn’t, it clings to him so much that Steve can see the entire half of his tight and tighter belly along with the shadow of his belly button through the fabric even in the low light, illuminated just by the fridge.

It’s obvious. This is happening a lot.

There’s nothing weird going on but this. The shifting at night? There’s an easy answer to that. It’s Bucky getting up to go and feast. All of the missing foods? They’re sitting in Bucky’s big, getting bigger belly. Clothes that don’t fit like they should? Bucky’s not doing anything to the laundry and it isn’t the machine's fault as they thought (they owe the washer and dryer an apology), Bucky’s just outgrowing them - eating himself out of his wardrobe. The sounds at night? Not mice. Mice aren’t heavy enough to make those sounds anyway. Bucky certainly is heavy enough, though. Especially these days if he’s always eating like that. Asleep, messy, and unashamed as he stuffs everything within reach into his gob, swallowing it down until Steve can see his pulse throb in his drum-taut, shiny gut where it hangs out of his shirt. The unrested feeling? Bucky isn’t resting as much as he should. He’s working. Just look at all that sweat as he keeps bulldozing through calories instead of sleeping peacefully. His body is fighting to keep sleeping right now, not drifting happily through dreamland. The upset belly? Yeah. No shit. It just can’t handle all this food. His stomach isn’t groaning and gurgling in hunger, it’s desperately trying to push through all the food he shoves into it.

Oh.

And there’s something about all of the weirdness that is so weird it’s tripped and fallen into arousal stirring within Steve. It’s, just… interesting.

He looks different, retired, and it’s a good look. Happier, shinier, and chubbier, soon-to-be fatter.

It’s so interesting and new, capturing Steve’s attention so intensely, that the next morning (sleeping only a few hours between waiting for something to happen and then watching it happen) Steve springs out of bed earlier than usual. He doesn’t spend the extra time going for an extra long run, though. He spends it cooking.

After his conscious’s unintentional feast last night - his unconscious’s intentional feast - Steve is really fucking curious to see how much Bucky will be able to fit inside himself. Now, Steve knows his tummy is complaining of being too full, not too empty, but he still wants to see it fuller. Overflowing. He wants to gauge Bucky’s capacity and then push to exceed it. Just to see. It has nothing to do with the dreams he had last night of even softer, more plush flesh that overwhelms Bucky’s frame and leaves him looking so round and big. Plump like a cherub - a nice belly, thick limbs all the way down to wrists and ankles with rolls, and, of course, including pretty rosy cheeks.

Steve whips up a storm, cooking and baking himself, and ordering food straight to their door.

Everything he can think of. Anything Bucky might want. He needs a buffet because if he’s eating the same thing, he’ll get tired of all the same flavor, he needs variety to keep going when he’s awake and can mostly taste what he’s eating - if Steve’s lucky, Bucky will scarf down the food so fast he won’t be able to taste it, all that will happen is puffing that big belly out even more. Leaving him soooo bloated.

And pretty soon Steve has bagels and cream cheese, pop tarts, oatmeal, pancakes, eggs scrambled and boiled and sunny side up, protein shakes, buttered toast, yogurt, fruit, waffles, oh, also chicken and waffles, sausage, muffins, hashbrowns, scones, biscuits and gravy, cereal and whole milk, cinnamon rolls with enough thick and sugary frosting to make Steve’s teeth hurt just looking at them, smoothies, and more.

Bucky is so sweet yet grumpy in the morning, half-awake and bleary-eyed, that he does not question why their dining table and countertops are covered with food. He simply accepts Steve at face value when he says Bucky’s belly started wailing before Steve even woke up, so he figured he’d be hungry and should make a “little bit” bigger breakfast than normal.

Bucky plops heavily down into his favorite dining table chair and starts work.

He steamrolls through the food, carving a path through the overladen table, leaving nothing but scraped clean plates, a few chicken bones, egg shells, and empty cream cheese containers in his wake.

He starts strong but after a while, Steve standing there in a stupor watching his every move, Bucky begins to struggle. He pants quietly at first but his breathing grows heavier and heavier just like his tummy that looks poised to burst out of his sleep pants and shirt. The seams are straining, little holes appearing at the sides of his shirt. He’s so round and overdue looking that Steve can see the bottom of his belly - and, wait, when did his gut get big enough that there’s a bottom to his tummy?

He’s so round and overdue looking that Steve can see the bottom of his belly where all his stretch marks have found a home - double wait, though, when did he get stretch marks? And is that his sleepless delirium talking or are they getting bigger and redder right now? Just from eating so much in one sitting? They look… hot.

Steve’s getting hot just staring at them, clawed into his belly where he should be soft but he’s all tight like this. All that food churning inside him, just barely contained by his stressed skin, a big, heavy pile of calories trying to be worked into more fat to cover up just how full his stomach is with soft layers of belly fat but… Bucky’s making his body work for it.

He’s not just panting now, he’s groaning and sweating, too. He’s having a hard time but isn’t questioning. He’s just doing.

Surely he knows what he’s doing, right?

“Uh,” Steve steps toward the table, “Buck?”

Bucky looks up from his single-minded focus on eating. Consume. More. Gorge. Swallow everything in sight.

His eyes are totally glassy. At first, Steve thinks he looks poised to cry like he’s pushed himself so far that it hurts, and that might be the case, but, really, it’s that same glassy, fucked-out look he gets when Steve’s shoving something else inside him. Usually, the other end but, oof, also sometimes shoving things into his mouth. Steve has an absurd thought of ordering a pack of Twinkies just to have the same shape. He has to cut himself off before he completely loses his train of thought and nerve.

Rushing, totally embarrassed, Steve explains what he did last night and, thus, explains what’s happening to Bucky’s clothes and body to a mostly out-of-it Bucky. He’s food-drunk but he can still think, in short bursts, between gulps of coffee so sugary and creamy it may as well be a milkshake.

His slow thinking is evident as he says, “well, what we should do? I don’t wanna, like, be locked in the bedroom so I can’t get out at night, that’s…”

Steve shudders, yeah, that’s way, way too controlling for him to be comfortable with. He doesn’t want to be anything like the terrors of Bucky’s past. He doesn’t want to lock him in their bedroom. He doesn’t want to chain him to bed, either.

But…

"What do you mean? Do?" Steve blurts.

"Well,” Bucky looks down at himself, specifically at his middle, pushing hard up against the edge of the table and the arms of his chair. A blush suddenly covers his sweaty face, “I'm gonna get fat, Steve! We gotta do something,” Bucky accuses himself through a mouthful of food. Steve’s a sorry bastard, though, ‘cause it should be disgusting, but it isn’t. His dick goes zing! like it’s taken to doing every time Bucky eats or comments on his tummy feeling funny or his clothes not fitting. He swallows, and Steve feels disappointed. Now he’s the weird one. Wonderful. “...fatter,” Bucky adds in a mumble. For someone who’s so concerned about getting bigger, he’s sure doing a good job going that way, stuffing more into his mouth. He has hardly slowed down.

So, Steve lets himself be bold, "and?"

"I-" Bucky sputters, surprised.

"You don't think I like you like this, Buck?” Steve reaches out, putting a few fingers under his puffy little chin, almost a double already. He wants to look at him. Those doe eyes and soon-to-be dough face and body… if he keeps going like this he’ll get there. Nice and plump and soft as over-proofed dough. The thought leaves Steve to lick his lips, his voice going low and rough, “you look fat, yeah, but you're hot as fuck. Look at you,” Bucky’s eyes flash down, but Steve won’t let go of his chin, squishing that bit of fat there to see him blush darker, “look at how nice and plump you are. You look well taken care of. Retirement is a good look, sweetheart."

Bucky makes a sound that’s scandalized.

“I don’t mind buying more food or clothes to keep you fed.”

“Oh?” Bucky’s breathing is back to that heavy panting, but now, it’s caused by arousal, not being overloaded on food, and still going.

“Of course, not. I’ll even buy another fridge if you want, one just for your midnight appetite if need be.”

They both shiver at that, the idea of Bucky’s belly growing so big and demanding that he can empty an entire fridge into it at night, then get up in the morning and eat more. More, more, more. How fat can he get? How can Steve push his waking and sleeping appetite? How soft, how out of shape, how retired can he look? They both want to know.

[chaifootsteps]

i saw an interview this morning where valentinos voice actor is asked about his characters relationship to the other vees and he briefly explains that vox and val in this weird gay relationship where they make out and do stuff but then straight up says "uhhhh i dont know what valentinos relationship is with velvet lol!"

the bar is in hell for women characters (pun intended) because a velvet USED to have a relationship with vox and val during the instagram days. i like that she was more like a daughter to him and that they bonded over violence! shit like that was what actually made valentino feel like a complex character who can be good and bad. because i literally cannot think of a single relationship hes on good terms with. voxvals whole appeal is that theyre toxic gay bitches! so having just ONE good relationship in his life, even if its just with his weird 30 year old coworker daughter, could actually make him feel like a person with layers like valentino fans desperately insist he is in the show.

since rn velvet just kind of. exists! she barely speaks to the other vees, doesn't seem to enjoy spending time with them unless she can film them dancing and making out, shes mostly frowning in the finale whenever vox opens his mouth, and never directly even speaks to val. why would val not speak to someone he lives (i think) and considers his equal?

like she very much has the ability to become a compelling fun character/villian when shes separated from the other vees. which sucks! because it just makes me wonder "would valentino or vox tangibly lose anything if velvet didnt work with them? and would anything change about their dynamic if she wasnt there?" and i know the answer is "probably not!"

the fact that no ones mentioned her despite s2 having a "heavier focus on the vees" is so fucking telling. she really doesnt feel like the backbone of the vees! she feels like the third wheel vox and val hired and she just stays with them for power despite her not speaking/having a relationship with them at all. its not even like the idea of "30 year old woman stops caring so much about her gay dads she created and slowly begins to resent them, working with them anyway for power" is a terrible idea, but i absolutely know thats not what viv intended. vel is absolutely an afterthought in the writing when shes with the other vees and its apart of what makes me dislike them now more then ever. if s1 couldnt even have velvet speak to the other vees about ANYTHING other then important business stuff (like, idk, fashion, technology, love potions, the few fucking things these characters have in common) then i doubt s2 is gonna be much better.

anyway velvet should leave the vees and get some granny gyatt from carmilla thank u 4 reading <3

Calling it now, season 2's going to contain as little Velvette as Viv can get away with. Because you said it best yourself -- she's not so much a character as a third wheel Vox and Val hired. If they're not around then she's sometimes allowed to shine, but if they are, forget it. It's all about them.

[cuubism]

I know it's been awhile, but I can't stop won't stop (not sure how to stop) thinking about the Complex Mathematics AU. Would you be willing to share any headcanons or random thoughts you have about that universe? Just curious! All your writing is fantastic <3

oh i was literally just working on this au right now! what timing

there are.. just so many partially finished oneshots for this universe in my drafts. there's integration, which takes place immediately after complex mathematics and before derivation and is about their first time (obvious title selection is obvious).

“Come here, you.” He tugs Dream forward by one of his long, long legs, knocking him onto his back. Then he leans down and kisses his ankle, then the inside of his knee. Dream tips his head back, stretching out.

His legs are as pale as the rest of him, paler even, and Hob mumbles into his skin, “You ever consider getting some sun?”

Dream huffs, swatting at his head. “Why? What sun are you referring to?”

And, well, yeah. They do live in London.

“It’s enrichment. Get you out of your cave for a while.” He climbs up Dream’s body to catch his mouth again, grinning against his lips. “We should go to the beach.”

“I think not.”

“I think so. I think I want to see you with salt in your hair.” He kisses under Dream’s ear. “Don’t you want to see what equations you can find in the waves?” “They are waves, the equations are known,” Dream says. But warmth finds his voice. He drags his hands up Hob’s back, his touch leaving a prickling trail. “You would look ravishing in the sun.”

there's imaginary numbers, which is about family.

“What were you doing up at six a.m.?” he asks when he’s awake next, several hours later, finally drinking the coffee Dream had brought. 

“I was coming here,” Dream says. “I wished you not to wake alone.”

That puts a lump in Hob’s throat.

The thing about Dream, Hob’s learned, is that he’s cold and rude and utterly disinterested in social niceties on the outset, but once you’ve wormed your way into his heart you get this. This utterly soft, aggressively loving thing that woke up before the sun rose – or more likely, didn’t sleep at all – to spend the day with Hob because it’s been a year since his mom died and he’s sad about it.

Hob’s not even sure how he knew it was today. Hob’s told him about these things by now, but not all of the details. 

“I don’t know why this one bothers me so much, more than any other,” Hob tells him now, leaning against his shoulder in bed. “Maybe because she was the last person I had left.”

“You have faced much tragedy in quick succession,” Dream says. “Your resilience astounds me.” 

Hob doesn’t know what to say when Dream says things like that. He just tips his head against Dream’s shoulder.

Finally, he says, “Nothing else for it. What else am I going to do, give up? Only way out is through, and all that. Though I do get one day a year of just moping and being pitiful.” He laughs. “Which you’re currently witnessing.”

“If you are expecting me to retract my statement and call this average, you will be waiting a long time,” Dream says.

there's 1 + 1 = 3 which is about stress and stress-relieving measures (lol) and just.. being freaking weird together.

“You will pay for disturbing my work,” Dream warns, and kisses him before he can respond, teeth in Hob’s lower lip. 

“Yeah?” Hob manages when they part for breath. “How?”

He’s expecting a lot of things, but not for Dream’s smile to turn playful and mischievous against his lips and for him to say, “Multiplication tables.”

Hob bursts out laughing, rocking Dream in his lap. Dream chuckles, too, cheek pressed to Hob’s.

“Want me to repent by writing ‘I will not disturb Dream’s work’ fifty times on the board while I’m at it?”

“That would be a poor use of time that could be better spent kissing you.” 

fractal geometry, about dream and delirium's relationship.

“Delirium,” Dream says. His voice is low and he enunciates very precisely. “Do you see the colors on my shirt? Tell me something that matches each color.”

Through her sniffles, Del squints at his shirt. “That isn’t yours. You only wear black.”

“No, it’s Hob’s,” he admits.

Del gives him a toothy grin. “So sappy about your boyfriend,” she sings. “Can’t pretend to be a jerk anymore.”

“I will continue being a jerk to those who deserve it,” Dream sniffs. “Which is most people.”

“He called the head of the Maths department an imbecile the other day,” Hob says, and Del laughs, high and ringing.

“You are lucky your glare is very scary or I think you’d get punched a lot,” she tells Dream.

Dream says, “It would be worth it.”

as well as a handful of other snippets that haven't been sorted into any specific fic.

i'm still very obsessed with this as you can see, i just haven't finished any of it lately XD

[popsicle-parfait]

I can't sleep and I'm going through it so I'm gonna do what I do best: Yap.

So new Honkai Star Rail drip marketing happened and of course everyone is excited because not only is playable Sunday finally happening but we also now get to see what finally happened to Fugue (Tingyun) during the whole Phanttilia... Phantilya.... Phantylia.. Oh fuck it. Bad identity theft big lady.

WARNING: THIS POINT ON IS A RANT❗❗YOU ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO READ THIS AND I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS YOU GET FROM IT❗❗

So I've seen a lot of people say that they're happy about Sunday's new design because it shows that he's happier and has grown as a character but I can't help but feel... Disappointed. See, the reason I was so interested in Sunday as a character was because to me he felt really complex morally and you don't see that a lot in games where "friendship is magic". The only other characters I can think of that kinda hit this mark were Sparkle and Gallagher but I have reasons for not liking them as much. Sparkle felt too much like " here's the crazy anime girl troupe you wanted" so I couldn't connect with her and Gallagher to me isn't so much morally complex as he is just mysterious and a bit confusing.

Another reason I really liked Sunday was because I'm so used to seeing the "villain turned to friend turned to that one guy we keep making fun of for jokes and no longer holds the same powerful aura he had" pipeline and when I saw him in the story I thought he was going to different, "there's no way this guy is going to change he's so attached to his beliefs"... And then the drip marketing dropped.

Now, I fully understand that Mr. Gopherwood manipulated him from adoption but to me that added to his character, and his depth. " oh what you don't wanna see him happy??? " well of course I do, and my single opinion certainly won't change that, I just wish that every antagonist we come across doesn't end up being redeemed all the time. "But what about hoolay, what about phantwhatever, what about.. " those aren't going to be playable characters. I'm talking about those who the creators actually have in mind to be playable one day.

Another thing to add onto this, I think the new outfit kinda takes away from the religious and elegant undertones he had in his previous design. When I look at his old model, I think "oh this guy means business, he obviously has a presence and I need to respect him" but when I look at the new design I think "Hm.. Well he kinda looks like a weird scientist" and it throws me off how different they are.

At the end of the day this is purely opinionated and everyone can have their own take on this, I just wanted to keep my mind off of whatever it is stopping me from sleeping right now. Feel free to discuss with me, just don't have hostile intentions lol.

[eggdrawsthings]

Re the prev ask/answer... Yeah that's totally valid and understandable! I'm also feeling kinda sad and conflicted about Sol at this point

I still love his character for the most part, but also yikes.. I almost want to just live in a fanon universe where he didn't act the way he did back in Brendok but that's easier said than done emotionally

I was lowkey wanting to draw him and maybe I still will someday, portraits are a different vibe after all, but yeah I definitely get why it'd feel weird now to draw more character/interaction focused art like yours

Love Grogu and Din too, they're adorable! I actually didn't watch much of the Mandalorian but maybe I'll check it out again when the Acolyte's finally over. Also sorry for the long rambly ask! XD

gonna put both of your asks into one here.

Yeah you get me. I can still draw Jecki, im used to character death in media now it's no big deal. More angst more ideas lol. But it's a diff story for Sol tho. I admit I have my own bias towards Sol cuz of his father's instinct, and also it's the first time I have an Asian Jedi Master who's wise and likable (my other fav was Plo Koon). So the reveal hurts way worse. I still think that there's a much better way to handle their story while staying in character and still having the same tragic outcome, still putting Sol in the position of someone living w his guilt and shame. The canon event did make him a much more interesting and complex character, yes, but I can't help feeling like he's made to be a punching bag for the narrative atp. Again, great premise, not so good execution, imo.

And yeah now I can't draw him without feeling shitty because all I want to draw is his fatherly interaction w the kids. I could, if i want to. But once I post it online, I can't stop ppl from coming in and saying "well uh actually he did that", and "Jecki and Yord would not like him" yada yada. I read everyone's tags and cmt, and as a non-confrontational person, it will affect me and make me feel shitty even more. So im just gonna protect my own peace and go back to my safe space haha. I'm just a silly guy making fanart for fun, im not paid for any of this experience aksjdhalsd

[crushedsweets]

do you perhaps have any or more ticciwork hcs.. like how they are with each other 😊😊 !1!1 idk!! any hcs that has something to do with them together. I heart them

hi anon. i got u . i got u . i got u. this is more how they meet in my au. ill do cutesy headcanons eventually. i tried to break this up into different sections but its kinda long and a lot to swallow ... sorry LOL. it doesnt even get outright shippy/romantic but its cool

OK BACKSTORY

ok so in my au. the operator is what drove toby to kill his dad, and he spent a couple months under the operators influence acting like an entire menace. tim and brian got orders from slender to intercept this, but slender realized toby would follow like a loyal dog after being 'saved'. so proxy toby it is.

clockwork was under the operators influence right before her trip to the psychiatric ward, and it lasted maybe 7 months? luckily for Her, her family's death and her disappearance went relatively under the radar cuz theyre seen 'trailer trash' with no friends/presence in any community. she's fighting to hold down a job since she keeps getting fired for going weeks with no contact.

ok HOW THEY MET

they met because toby was stalking a household that natalie wanted to kill the dad of. natalie would be in the middle of an operator episode, where she's behaving erratically, her eyes were glossed over, she is SIGNIFCANTLY stronger than usual. typically, toby would be much stronger than this lanky malnourished girl, but not that night.

they got into a bit of a tussle that Toby's struggling to win. a light in the house turned on cuz of the noise and toby was like Oh fuck this. and he runs off. the flash of the light kinda disturbed clocky and she half regains her senses and runs off too, but still not fully in control. she doesnt realize that shes following toby, but the operator knows this is another chance to kill one of slender's proxies (plus the operator was in control of toby a year prior, before slender took over).

eventually tobys back on the path to the forest, walking through some rural cornfield area and thinking long and hard about nat. and shes looking for him. shes being insanely fucking creepy and slashing at the corn and bushes (she has a machete now). toby tics, and she yells about how she hears him, etc. he's starting to piece together that shes under the operators influence and hes like 'slenders gonna be so hyped i got him a new proxy' (slender does not want her .)

HOW THEY....became friends..?

he eventually plays a game of cat and mouse and gets her to follow him to the cabin. pretty quickly tim and brian are up and they get her down, duct taped her arms, tied her to a random pipe in the kitchen, and spend some time debating on what to do. shes swapping between screaming, thrashing, foaming at the mouth and just sitting there silently staring off into the void and swaying. eventually she gets out of the episode and she's acting normal, albeit angry and covered in dirt. they get her off the pipe and talk to her.

ive mentioned how slender um kinda grossly leaks an inky liquid.... and it has effects... ok yea drink that and the operator eventually loses control over you. toby kinda explains it to her. in complete desperation and exhaustion, natalie's like "you can fix this ? you can stop the amnesia and waking up in random peoples blood??? you can stop me from going into random fucking cornfields acting like a monster????". toby was like yea:3 SURE CAN

but it hurts. its physically painful, mentally exhausting, it's almost like withdrawal symptoms. It can take a couple weeks to months to finally get the operator off, and multiple doses of the ink. again, tim and brian do NOT live full time at the cabin, so she's left with toby mostly. its really uncomfortable. theyre both awkward assholes. tobys intentionally blunt, natalie grew up with no filter. but toby has this weird complex where he's convinced the boss is gonna be soooo happy that toby did this 'for him.' so he keeps it up.

usually they just kinda coexist.. but tobys on edge all the time. the second she gets weirdly quiet and starts spacing out, toby gets kinda aggressive and starts suggesting he needs to restrain her or some weird shit. they have gotten into another physical fight when she was in another episode, but tim and brian pulled them off of eachother. she rarely remembers it, and toby doesnt bring it up cuz hes embarrassed that natalie is as strong as him when under the influence. but she's ..kinda like a willing prisoner ? she really doesnt wanna be there but she wants to be done with feeling possessed. occasionally she gets really violent and her eyes roll back and she has to be duct taped and locked in a room over night or else she might kill toby. the next morning toby mumbles apologies as he cuts off the tape and rubs her wrists for her. she understands, even if she hates it.

AFTER THE OPERATOR

a couple weeks go by of pain, then a month of normalcy. the operator gets his claws off natalie and she's like. ugh. ok. that fucking sucked ass. fuck you guys. but thanks.

slenderman doesnt want her. she literally doesnt care that he doesnt want her tho LMFAO she didnt want to be a proxy. tobys pissed and is mad at her for like a week even tho its not even her fault. but anyway..

tim hated being around her because 1. it hurts to see a young girl crying and writhing in pain 2. it hurts to see what you used to be like. brians chill, he always fed her, he's brought her some books and stuff.

but, of course, she spent the most time with toby - and they got closer. theyd sit and talk, he'd bring her around the forest, kinda explain a lot of um. The Lore. LOL. toby introduced her to jack, theyve gone swimming together, taught her how to cut down trees, she's drawn him and he's in awe. she loves books and stories but has pretty bad dyslexia, so he read a book out loud for her once. they kinda both poked fun at eachother ('ur stutter is making this annoying' 'at least i can fucking read') and ended up never doing that again LMFAOOO but he started hooking up audio books for her. it was kinda cringe for them both, but a sweet gesture

she finally started working as a waitress/bartender in this underground shady ass bar. the patrons started to love her bc she's tall like a model, long hair, nice voice, witty, has a sharp tongue. fits right in with the grimy atmosphere. toby gets grossed out anytime he comes to visit her/pick her up and middle aged men are saying bye to her. he doesnt know if its jealousy or if its generally just ew. she rightfully complains about it tho so he's like 'heh.... knew it.... she wouldnt want those guys.....' hes so annoying i love him

he helps fix up a nice little barn for her, cuz slender gets riled up anytime she's at the cabin for more than a few days. something something about not wanting a distraction or 'outsiders' there.

but yeah :3

they never end up dating in my lore though. they never even admit having feelings for eachother. nats real good at pushing these things down, and toby just doesnt think its worth it. (plus i want toby to also have a little arc with jack.. LMFAOAOAO SORRY im a ticciwork and ticcijack shipper my bad).

eventually they do stop having feelings for eachother, but everything remains the same. theyre really close. theyre cute. i love them.

thank you anon

[frenchgremlim1808]

WHAT YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS SAYS ABOUT YOU: YTTD EDITION

PART 1) THE PARTICIPANTS

SARA CHIDOUIN:

You can’t stop praising her about how amazing of a protagonist she is compared to other protags in similar games such as danganronpa. You would and WILL fight anyone that says anything bad about your homegirl an you DEFINITELY need therapy

JOE TAZUNA:

You have the terrible habit of falling immediately in love with the best friend archetype that we met in the beginning who’s clearly gonna die. When they die you keep telling yourself you won’t be fooled again and then you do. Anyway you are in denial

KEIJI SHINOGI:

You keep justifying you love for him by using the “he’s a complex character, he’s deep and shit” but that’s just an excuse to not say “i want him to carnally fuck me and treat my little bitch with his huge arms and tits”. Whatever sexuality you were before, his deep look probably turned you gay. Anyhow you are horny as fuck and you definitely need therapy, you little whor-

REKO YABUSAME:

Either you are the the most gay motherfucker on the planet or you’re veeeeeeeeeeery straight.  you’re favorite ship is naoreko. NEVERTHELESS you want her to step on you. 

Q-TARO BURGERBERG: 

there is exactly two type of q-taro fans, The meme lord or the 20 page Reddit post defending his character from any criticism. We allllll know which ever type of fan you are, you cried like a baby in his final moments.

 KAZUMI MISHIMA:

You definitely made every possible outcome in ytts, an replayed it multiple times. You probably follow  “ mishima-in-places-he-shouldnt-be” and is still sad that this gentle loving dude had to die first why it is. always. the. cool. dudes. who. dies. first., WHY, WHY NANKIDAI ?

KANNA KIZUCHI: 

You are awesome, smart, and just the perfect person to be around, you’re aura smells pure awesomeness, no, NO i am not biased.at.all it’s not like  she’s my profile picture. 

In all seriousness, you probably crave any green bling content and also loves shin too but kanna passion and pure kindness made you make the choice to kill shin. It seemed to difficult to vote for a kid so you voted shin. You relate to kanna struggles And ADORES her character development in 3b. Also you definitely need many therapy session (not projecting at all) .

NAO EGOKORO: 

If being a joe fan is sadness, a greenbling fan depression, well being a nao fan is literal despair and anger with anguish. Bro what the fuck did she do to have such an horrible end like that, her entire experience in the death game was  a pure nightmare. Homegirl did nothing wrong, she shouldn’t literally even be here dude😭���. You have only one consolation is that now she’s in heaven with her girlfriend, also obviously you ship naoreko

GIN IBUSHI:

You are right in fact you are 99.99 percent of the fandom. And i know that if one day you see anyone put gin below S tier or say anything relatively negative about him, you WILL find them, you WILL track them , and you’re gonna BOIL THEM ALIVE. And i will probably cheer you so go on, pop off, girlboss or mansplain bestie !  

KAI SATOU:

You are mesmerized by his beautiful aura and luscious long mane. Every time the characters talk about him you feel so much happiness that his sacrifice was in the end really worth it, but still you cry that the cutest malewife had to go first.

ALICE YABUSAME:

His atrocious hair made you burn your eyes, his cringe fail personality made you laugh but his death destroyed you entirely. In the end you fell for this transmasc king. If you played logic rote you probably died a second time lol.

S H I N  T S U K I M I:

Shin tsukimi, oh, Shin Tsukimi the character of all time. So from what i understand he’s your favorite character. Were you the weird kid in your class when you were in high school or that one queer kid that tried to hide your identity but everyone knew just by a single look? Just by looking at you i can see a lot of self loathing and unaddressed personal issues that you try hiding under a rug instead of actually addressing them. Do you take time to eat, to drink, don’t forget to take a break from negativity when you are at your lowest, okay ? Diagnosing you is pretty hard you probably have a thousand problems but at least, i hope, not as much as this little dumbass.                                           There is two type of shin fans:

-the one who want to punch him, shove him into a locker and bully him 

-the one who want to give him a warm hug, a nice soup and a good night of sleep.                                                                                                                    In both cases, you are exactly like him and projecting so hard onto him. Also you are supeeeeeer gay like extra gay. Like your aura smells GAY you know. No cis het allo kinnie of shins exist actually, it’s as possible as dividing 0 by 0.  

So conclusion go to therapy

KUGIE KIZUCHI:

Ao3 is your god, your lord and everything that you need to live. Every time ao3 get down you die inside. You crave any content of her and wish that we can know more in the future about her (i do too) and you probably feel in love with her trough fanfic.

MEGUMI SASAHARA:

You guys exists? Well you like evil boss woman, i guess.

This shit full of errors and mistakes also this is a joke don’t get offended, remember as a greenbling fan i am probably the least respected type of yttd fan, well above the keiji simps you guys are wild. 

[emmys-grimoire]

Nightbringer

Okay, emerging briefly from my hibernation to offer my thoughts on the livestream bombshell that dropped yesterday.

It looks like we’re getting a whole new game with the same characters and the same setting. I’m not sure what this means for the original game. Are they separating the fluff and the actual story now? The trailer is notably grittier and darker than anything we’ve seen yet, befitting the “Nightbringer” moniker.

Here’s a few notable things in the trailer which may or may not be getting attention. I don’t know: I hardly pay attention to most of the fandom.

Time travel shenanigans again

If you weren’t fond of how they handled the time travel in S1, well, you’re probably not going to like this.

In the beginning of the trailer, and at the very end, we get a shot of a bunch of spiraling doors and Barbatos hushing us. Soooo... we’re probably the same MC and we’re deliberately being flung back in time to fix the future, or something along those lines. I would not pin hope on a brand new MC or one of the brothers being a PoV character.

How do the doors relate to Barbatos? Well besides his room featuring them, the devs were so keen on the concept of a room full of thousands of doors that they modeled Barbatos after this concept. They’re finally using it!

The livestream suggested that the story will occur shortly after the Great Celestial War, and there’s several shots in the trailer that support this.

Namely, Satan’s.

We’re finally getting that Satan lore (probably)

One of the first scenes in the trailer is a before and after shot.

We can tell it’s a before-after shot because of the setting (first is the Celestial Realm -- there’s no sun in the Devildom -- and, well, they’re clearly angels) and the fact that Satan isn’t in the first shot.

Additionally, the character reel...

The parallels can’t be any more on the nose, really. Lucifer is in obvious pain and clutching his head, and Satan mirrors him and looks like he wants to gouge out Lucifer’s eyes. Everyone else is just looking cool.

Soon after, we get this scene.

The brothers are filed behind Lucifer/Diavolo in order... except for Satan, who is the closest behind Lucifer. I’m guessing Lucifer just found out he’s a father. Congratulations!

There’s too much here for it not to be a relevant plot point.

Weird Ass (Evil?) Goo

I think one of the game’s weak points is the story doesn’t have any serious threats or big bads, and they don’t have the complex interpersonal relationships to fill in that gap and still make a compelling story -- or, rather, they’re now afraid of portraying our husbandos in unflattering lights for any prolonged period of time now that they’re hopelessly in love with us.

I think they might be changing that with Nightbringer.

Beyond the fact that we’ll need to go back in time for some reason, there’s this weird goop thing in the trailer.

It starts with the moon turning red.

Not a big deal. It looks cool and I’d normally dismiss it as just artistic flair, but this shot follows it right after. It’s some strange liquid swirling around an orb of light (presumably the ‘moon’?)

Weird. Not only that, but...

They zoom in on it and the “moon” inside of it begins to disintegrate. It’s also featured in the background in of each character shot.

I wonder if there’s going to be some evil symbiote messing things up and we’re being sent back in time to destroy it before it gets out of hand lol

Maybe it’s the Nightbringer or something

In conclusion...

I’m cautiously optimistic about this new game but slightly concerned about the old game. This might have been the alternative to writing season 5, but if it gives me the lore and conflict the story so desperately needs, then I’m happy; I’ve stopped logging in for a reason.

I’d like there to be no gacha elements in Nightbringer but hahahahaha that’s not gonna happen 

[killersnarl]

okokok as someone who is starting to collect facts to write a 9fic, i have a question

you've mentioned he sounds like corpsehusband a while back, if i remember correctly

would 9 do the iconic "whaddup baby" line if asked, for shits and giggles?

// yes cause tbh that’s just how he talks normally, he talks super casual no matter who he’s talking too. only exception is his weird biblical monologues when he’s being a freak

i have all this stuff linked in the carrd and i think ive posted this before, but i compiled some nine writing info for my friends a while back and i figured it could be useful to you guys if you haven’t seen it already :3 under the cut (there’s also my list of nine mannerisms i posted a little while ago, and i posted some notes on his accent if it’s ever relevant lol)

i think part of the difficulty that comes with writing nine is due to his characteristic unpredictability. that’s why he’s so fickle to deal with, as a character and as a person. his characterization is complex. even though he’s unpredictable in behavior, there’s some things integral to his personality that can probably help figure out what he’s going to do. the hard part is, to other people, he’s an enigma.

something you’ll find in nines behavior along the line is that it’s contradictory. humans are contradictory. he doesn’t know what he wants.

he’s very nice, i can say that. as long as you’re not a target, he’s a sweetheart. he’s nice even if he’s terrorizing you, sometimes. if they know what he is, a lot of people will have a very hard time with his attitude. they seem to think it’s all a ruse, a trap, but the truth is he’s just being honest. he doesn’t care enough to be a dick. he doesn’t care about you enough to be rude to you. being mean takes energy away from him. it’s much easier for him to be politely apathetic. it’s in his nature to be kind to others, even in his own twisted way. he shows basic regards to everyone without being super enthusiastic.

part of that shows in how he treats employees in places, i think. he rarely ever causes trouble in stores, unless it happens to be a place of target practice. he always pays for things, leaves tips, he’s not very partial to stealing. that being said, he definitely gets things for free a lot of the time. he’s huge and scary.

nine is pretty chipper for someone who hates himself and his life and thinks he’s a horrible person (he is). you’ll barely ever catch him moping around. he only mopes when he’s alone and even then he doesn’t do it much, he hates moping. he’s in constant emotional (and physical) pain and he has been for so long to the point that comfort makes him uncomfortable. he’s extremely comfortable in his suffering. he pushes away things he likes, people he likes, because he’s not used to feeling that happiness, and he doesn’t want to feel that happiness.

he’s hypocritical about it too. he hates happiness and being unhappy makes him happy. sometimes he’ll make himself happy on purpose just to make himself uncomfortable. it’s a paradox.

he does take time to entertain himself sometimes, even though he hates admitting it. he usually doesn’t even realize it’s making him happy, which is why he immediately stops what he’s doing when it finally comes to him. he’ll stick around with people if he can, people that he likes watching. he likes watching how people behave, making comments about it, irritating them about it. that’s just his way of making friends. tell him about your interests, life story, favorite memories. he loves hearing about other people because it means there’s less space for him to fill up about himself.

he doesn’t like talking about himself. if asked, he’s usually pretty cryptic. he puts his whole life simply, more simple than it is. simple so you won’t ask questions. simple so he doesn’t have to think about it too hard. some people would probably see this as being humble, and he is humble, humble to the point of hatred.

he hates himself very thoroughly but that doesn’t stop him from making jokes. he’s a flirt, as everyone knows. very into teasing people about having crushes on him (which works, because they either do or they will.) people might take this as self confidence or arrogance, it’s anything but. he just likes reactions.

i think a lot of people might see him as careless. and he is, at least a little bit. he’s not careless as in sloppy, but careless as in nonchalant. he’s extremely nonchalant. some people might even find it annoying. nothing spooks him, nothing worries him, nothing excites him. nothing you know about, at least, nothing you’ll ever know about. he’s always calm and casual, and he never wipes that lazy smile off his face.

nine likes feigning things. not because he’s dishonest, but because he likes making jokes, he likes being entertaining. you’ll never really scare him, but he’ll give you a delayed gasp and hand over his heart just to irritate you. you’ll never really make him angry, but he’ll give you a sudden outburst if he thinks you need to be scared back into your place, and quickly laugh when you jump. it never seems like he’s being serious. he’s always joking, he’s always lighthearted. you’ll know when he’s being serious.

something that was a LOT more apparent when he was an older teenager, he can be protective. he’s very aware that most people are weaker than him, he’s been aware of that for a while now, and he’s learned to take advantage of that. when he was younger he was almost like a communal bodyguard. wherever he was, nine was the protector of whoever was there, and they all knew that. he used to equally see himself as a protector and a punisher, but now he’s just a punisher. at least he thinks so. now protection is somewhat of a habit. he’ll put himself between you and a stranger, block someone off with an arm, tell you to walk on the inside of him on the sidewalk, make you walk close in front of him in unfamiliar places.

[onebraincell-itmiebcraft]

Liveblogging real life part 2: Joel (it's been 12 13 days) (already watched)

Okay so maybe we'll do the liveblog-every-five-minutes-unless-something-crazy thing also idk if I should link this up to my intro post (idk how) or reblogged my og one with this oh well we'll figure it out why am I eating AGAIN doing this

I got inspired after rewatching secret life my beloved for the umpteenth time :P

Okay ep. 1/finale is hilarious and new "series" 😭

Joel why did you point out the cursor I can't take my eyes away

First batch

Joel jumping then immediately keeling over in nausea:

Idk how to respond to that but it struck a chord within me, how true

BigB wholesome waving but it also looks like his arm is BENT I can't get over VR arms man 😭

Punching BigB because he's so tall is so real tbh + love the smash cut to Gem being salty

Headpatting + baby-ish voice "little gem/Ren/skizz" what a gentleman makes me think of the try not to cry challenge or Jimmy's crazy christmas series where he says Joel is a crybaby and Gem says he's a romance guy in a mental gymnastics train of thought

Grian throwing his head back from the outside?! Cryptid behaviour

The real life vids don't make me motion sick but Joel making retching and vomiting sounds does NOT help it makes me sick by proxy or something I hate being disoriented and nauseous too buddy

There's probably a video out there of someone comparing regular mc to vr because vr just hits different like proportions wise

Joel noises

Love this Joel-Gem duo already idk how to describe it just fun

Also Joel having to process out loud he won't throw up on Gem I remember playing Richie's plank experience or whatever years and years ago shit was REAL

Joel's inventory becoming disorganized with things that can be stacked together :(

Hey what gem said kinda reminds me of what grian said :D at the end of his episode awful :DD

Poor Joel he's battling his height complex alongside his motion sickness (rip bozo poor little meow meow)

I think almost everybody had the problem of facing the wall dude, it's okay it's very silly

Water foreshadowing (he will swim with his future gang and become incredibly sick)

Geminislay that pig

Wait till Joel learns about lying down‼️‼️

JOEL STOP MAKING NAUSEOUS SOUNDS I'M GONNA FROW UP 👹

"...Falling in powdered snow" kinda reminds me of this short story I read in grade 9 English class "The Bamboo Trap" protag fell in The Bamboo Trap™ and got bitten by big ass spiders or something the idiot, also I think got published in the same anthology as the most dangerous game 👊

Joel admits to weakness

Weird ass snow, someone built this or something?

Joel with his arms out looks so silly, so does gem

Oh gem how graceful with the figure skating history 👊👊👊✌️👉✌️✌️🤜🤛🤛🤜🙏

Lol they learn about the wrist chat

Second batch

Jimmy, oh iconic Timmy

Shield (why did I write this again?)

Bi shoes, love seeing gem's skin wearing the bi shoes I forget about it every once in a while and when I see it again it's a pleasant surprise

Vr players learn to pvp

When you use the shield to block in first person it looks kinda stupid dude

Campsite vibes tbh, I really like it.

Bee spotted 🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝 what is it doing

Shaky controller cursor over top chest plate I feel you

Falling irl indeed (recursive mention about plank)

LOUD holy moly Joel is loud (not negative)

Healf being something people can't look at at all times is actually a kinda funny mechanic

Smajor friendship aww when will they team up (did I forget about a series)

The poor beg for bread, we live in a society ✊😔

Grian killing??? Since when??? (Sarcastic)

Batch three

Peace and love is why they haven't died yet 😘

Arms again! Weird looking things

Hand gesture reminds me of that one diamond scar short with etho's greedy "I want the diamond" voice

Flint and steel? Weird looking thing

Omg red club looks like bugs, the way the trio gossips about them ♥️

Right no out messages...

Can't believe the most motion sick man gets in the water not once but TWICE this ep

Does he know

Where did the horse thing come from

Can't remember if I mentioned this but when the sword swings without critting in VR it looks so silly it pokes

A bugs life: the sequel

Club: deadly euphemism

Sword 😐

Something about jimmy doesn't get burnt...

Why is Jimmy jiggles the only one with a wooden sword???

Strong words from a man on the verge of mania 👀

Lol knowing impulse breaks the ground under Joel big brain man going for the kill

Something about the disappointed way Joel says "scar!" And scar stabbing him in the first caused this

Tim is so British he says "get in" so much

Joel, again exasperated, cries out "where's all my stuff?!"

Funny Minecraft men, my favourite funny Minecraft men

My god seeing from Joel's perspective his second death is from zombie

I think Joel was about to saying bluming + the cover behind house + the constant begging for his stuff back + violence as an answer (he hits men)

4

Oh scar up to no good again

JOEL GETS IN THE WATER AGAIN!!! MOTION SICKNESS WIN!

Joel and scar just did mitosis stop being scared of biology 🙄

What was Mr solidaritygaming doing in that hill and said yes to did he finally get iron?

Aw the silly arm motion I love greeting people with spirit fingers reminds me of that

GOON SQUAD?! (neuron activated)

Famous moment

Oh more famous moment here comes the smallidarity kiss

Love Tim's body language once again the sharp smooth head turn to grian he's like a cartoon character

(what grian mean they are suited and booted he cut this part out I don't remember the other povs 😢)

Leave it to solidaritygaming himself to be the most homoerotic straight man there is of course + Joel is still patting him on the head? + Timsel being cringefail needing to jump multiple times on ONE BLOCK + Joel did NOT need to lean that much he looks like he's powered by springs + Jim's arms always being so tight together. Makes him. Look like. An old granny??? + Joel IMMEDIATELY checking his wrist afterwards like it's a Tuesday and he's on break + homophobic GRIAN + impulse's dad delivery one liner

The more I watch smallidarity kiss the more bizarre and asinine it becomes to me 😀

When did Joel learn to button jump (he WAS mental for jumping irl irl)

Okay Joel cut out that canary comment why don't you 🙄🙄🙄

WHACK 💀 SHAKE YOUR HANDS REAL FAST 💀💀 JOEL SCREAM #3997 💀💀💀

Fond of Joel's cadence of saying "hello guys!" And "I'm coming in boys!" And "HAHA!" oddly musical

Okay aaaaaaand he dies worst ranking ever good for him the end

Idk if I should liveblog scar next or watch Ren because I've already watched up to skizz + me 'ead 'urts oh well

[gunsatthaphan]

~ Monthly BL Breakdown: February 2023 ~  

🧚🏻‍♂️ Happy March!!! 💐

Disclaimer: ALL shows can be streamed here or here, as well as on Youtube and other platforms. For more info on where to watch what, check out this post!

New breakdowns are coming at the end of every month - feel free to add stuff! (previous breakdowns)

What came out this month? (green tick = seen or currently watching)

🌟 Our Winter - February 3rd (Thailand/South Korea) ✅

🌟 Because of You a Thousand Times - February 4th (Vietnam) 

🌟 Moonlight Chicken - February 8th (Thailand) ✅

🌟 The Promise - February 8th (Thailand)

🌟 My Beautiful Man Season 2 - February 8th (Japan)

🌟 Marry My Dead Body - February 10th (Taiwan)

🌟 Oh My God! (movie) - February 10th (Vietnam) 

🌟 Cafe in Love - February 11th (Thailand) 

🌟 Bus Stop - February 11th (Myanmar)

🌟 Moments of Love (movie) - February 14th (Thailand, theaters) 

🌟 Destiny Seeker - February 14th (Thailand) 

🌟 Ghos Two Kita - February 14th (Philippines) 

🌟 Pure Vanilla - February 14th (Singapore) 

🌟 Boyband - February 16th (Thailand)

🌟 Jack Frost - February 17th (Japan)

🌟 Bed Friend - February 18th (Thailand)  ✅

🌟 Chains of Heart - February 18th (Thailand)

🌟 Justice in the Dark - February 18th (China, censored) 

🌟 Tin Tem Jai - February 27th (Thailand) 

🌟 Teach Me How - February 27th (Philippines) 

🌟 Blue Sky Complex - February 27th (Japan)

Monthly likes/dislikes

❣️ Moonlight Chicken - one of my most anticipated shows over the past year and admittedly the first 2 episodes had me a bit unsure about the pacing and the characters as it was so divergent, which changed rapidly with episode 3 though and by episode 4 I was hooked lol. The storytelling approach is unconventional and so many nuances about the characters and their lives feel so real that it hits home hard lol and the realism + minimalism is a very nice change of scenery coming from gmmtv. The cast is superb to say the least and also the ppl behind the scenes deserve tons of praise because it’s obvious that it takes a good amount of life experience as well as in directing and writing to narrate these stories in the distinct way that they do and I applaud everyone who’s part of it because you can tell they put their heart and soul into this production. 9/10.

👎🏻 609 Bedtime Story - this is a bummer because I was really excited for this one, also since it’s from the eclipse director, and it had a very promising start but then it got real weird. Like why make it so complicated? there’s no need for that. We get the idea and what you’re trying to tell us. So why make the plot so tangled? sigh. On the other hand I really liked Ohm in this role and it might be his best one yet. He was finally able to showcase that he is capable of more than just 1 facial expression lmao so I liked him as Mum but unfortunately he wasn’t able to save the plot. what a shame. 6/10.

New series & movie announcements

🎥 Playboyy (produced by Copy A Bangkok) - Date TBA (Thailand)

🎥 7 Days Before Valentine - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Dinosaur Love (novel adaption) - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 STAY - Date TBA (Philippines)

🎥 Colorful Melody - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Love Puzzle - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Born to Be Y - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Venus in the Sky - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Love Mate - Date TBA (South Korea) 

🎥 My Blessing (produced by 9NAA) - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Let’s Eat Together (Manga adaption) - Coming June 2nd (Japan) 

🎥 The Last Time - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Y Universe - Date TBA (Thailand) 

🎥 Forever Yours - Date TBA (Philippines) 

🎥 My Dear You - Date TBA (Myanmar)

Other news from the BL world

❗️ Jam & Film, the mains of the BL To Sir, With Love, will be starring in a new series together under OneD. Further details have yet to be announced.

❗️ The main actors for the upcoming BL Pit Babe were announced. The main roles will be played by Pon Thanapon & Benz Natthapong. Others include Pavel Phoom, Nut Supanut, Michael Kiettisak and more.

❗️ The upcoming BL My Universe will consist of 12 stories with 12 couples and 24 chapters. 

❗️ The upcoming BLs Buddy Line Y Animal, as well as Man Suang, have commenced shooting. The release date for both is still unknown. 

❗️ Shootings for the upcoming multi-strand BL Our Skyy 2 have started. The episodes for KluenDao (Star in My Mind), PuenTalay (Vice Versa) and AkkAye (The Eclipse) have wrapped filming. Dates are still unknown. 

❗️ Actor Mew Suppasit (TharnType) expressed his frustration with his fans in a series of tweets where he stated that #MewGulf was never real and everything that him and his costar hinted at in the past was merely for fanservice purposes as him and G. were told to act like a couple according to their contract. He said him and G. have not spoken in over 2 years and told his fans to finally move on, as their obsession is having a negative effect on both their personal lives. He further told certain fans to get psychological help if they are unable to separate fiction from reality and stop their unhealthy obsession with a ship that never existed. Reactions from the fandom have been ambiguous. At the same time, filming for his upcoming BL Love Is like a Cat has begun. 

❗️ Actor Jeff Satur has left Be On Cloud. He will still be part of his upcoming series Wuju Bakery. 

❗️ The Chinese BL Novel “Silent Reading” has been adapted into a series called Justice in the Dark. Due to censorship, it looks like the show will mostly be bromance-themed. 

❗️ Fittings for the upcoming Domundi BL Punk Spy have started. An air date has not been announced. 

❗️ The currently airing BL Boyband has stopped airing on Youtube as announced by the production company and is currently only available for national fans. It is still unclear whether it will continue to be available for international audiences. 

❗️ Thai BL Triage won “Best BL Series of the Year” at this year’s BL News Awards

❗️ Thai BL Love Mechanics won "Best of Thai Series" and "Best of BL Series" at this year’s WeTV Awards. 

❗️ Park Seoham (Semantic Error) won “Best Drama Actor” at this year’s Forbes Korea Best Brand Awards. 

Upcoming series & movies for March

👉🏻 The Promise - March 1st (Thailand) 

👉🏻 All the Liquors - March 2nd (South Korea)

👉🏻 A Boss and a Babe - March 3rd (Thailand) 

👉🏻 Love Syndrome - March 4th (Thailand) 

👉🏻 Pastsenger - March 8th (Thailand) 

👉🏻 Our Dating Simulation - March 9th (South Korea)

👉🏻 Future - March 12th (Thailand)

👉🏻 A Shoulder to Cry On - March 14th (South Korea)

👉🏻 Unintentional Love Story - March 17th (South Korea)

👉🏻 Make a Wish - March 22nd (Thailand)

👉🏻 The Eighth Sense - March 29th (South Korea)

👉🏻 The Last Basic Together - March TBA (Vietnam) 

[ametistacollinsworld]

ツ Thad x Chaotic! Inventor! Worker Drone Reader

My 14 request! Hope you like!

❐❐❖❏❐❐❖❏❏❐❖❏❏

Thad knew several types of worker drones around the colony, some annoying, some cool, some weird..a certain very hardcore drone girl, Uzi to be exact, and you... who was pure chaos in a worker drone version and Uzi's best friend. When he found out about the things you had done, in addition to your many diabolical inventions against the disassembly drones, he was both impressed and afraid of you- after all, it wasn't just any worker drone that had the guts to take on murder drones... Like:

> You managed to make J think she was about to explode by making a ticking noise while you were hidden from her. (Only worked because she was low on oil- But still-)

> You've made a complex system of mirrors to direct sunlight to specific points in a certain location in the city, thus making that spot inaccessible to the murder drones. (Thad is really curious where you got so many mirrors-)

> Somehow you managed to get your hands on some thermite and so you ended up making some bombs. (Like- How?-)

> You managed to give N a can of oil so he doesn't hunt you down. (You threw the can right in his face- disappearing from sight completely)

> You managed to make V think that some buildings were haunted by human ghosts- (Thad really didn't want to know how you got it- he didn't want to get trauma from you sorry-)

> You used a magnetic arrow to join V and J wings once. (You liked to see the two of them trying to separate their wings- I mean- It's kinda funny I guess?)

> You managed to spoof a call from JCJenson, putting J on hold for at least two hours before she realized and angrily make a scene. (He wanted to see this honestly- lol)

After learning all of your brave and crazy deeds, Thad could now understand why you and Uzi were best friends...you guys were like a chaotic insane super hero duo?- nice.

Another normal day like any other had begun in the colony, with Thad still in his bed, sound asleep while seeming to have a beautiful dream. But suddenly he feels something heavy on top of him... so he slowly starts his systems, blinking his eyes to find only you on top of him... giving him an excited smile.

" Aah- ah?- (Y/n)?- What are you doing? It's still too early..and we still have school today at 6..." Thad spoke in a tired tone looking at the clock that said 2 am .

" Awn! Let's go Thad! I have something new I want you to see! " You exclaimed in an excited tone, still wearing your test lab coat, giving the sleepy drone a few shakes which he made small despondent moans of sleepiness.

" Alright, alright...just get off of me, so I can get ready.. " Thad said giving a small yawn, so you gave him a big smile, rolling off him only to stop on the other side of the bed. The male drone got up, heading to a dressing table there, taking his cap that was hanging and adjusting it on his head.

" What do you want to show me so badly anyway to wake me up so early (Y/n)? Besides having class I need to do my morning workout in 3 hours...and you could have woken my parents up..." Thad he said finally finishing fixing his clothes, then giving you a look in the mirror, which you just gave an innocent smile with bright eyes to your boyfriend.

" I didn't wake you up just to tell you what I built to you goofball... unless you don't want to see it... " You said simply, then faking a sad face that sent Thad into a panic.

" No, no! I really want to see! I'm just sleepy- " Thad said quickly with a panicked look not wanting his partner to get upset with him. You looked at him with a blank expression, then chuckled putting a hand over your mouth.

" It's okay darling..I'm just kidding with you- Aren't you just a sweet guy? Sweetie little guy? Hahaha" You said in a soft teasing tone, soon giving another giggle seeing Thad's cheeks blush.

" Come on (Y/n)... don't do that kind of stuff to me honey.. " Thad said shyly approaching the bed, then stopping in front of you looking into your eyes. You smiled at Thad with an amused smile.

" Are you ready now? I don't have time to waste " You say getting up and walking past Thad with a spin, thus looking at him once more. The male drone gave you a small shy smile, but soon agreed.

" Okay! Let's go now then! " You exclaimed excitedly, soon grabbing one of Thad's hands and starting to drag him out of his room, thus finally starting to walk through the corridors of the colony to your house and personal laboratory.

" I hope nothing got blown up while I was gone... " You spoke in a low tone to yourself, which Thad ended up hearing.

" Blown up?...(Y/n) don't tell me you were messing with bombs again.. I already told you how dangerous that is! Do you remember the last time you made that light bomb? You hurt your cheek really bad- " Thad questioned you with a concerned tone, which you gave a small grim smile at first, but then shook your head.

" No...they're not bombs...well, technically they are actually- " You said absently with a idiot smile.

" (Y/n)! " Thad exclaimed with a worried and sour expression. It made you chuckle softly at him, which calmed the poor drone a bit who looked at you with concern and love.

Thad loved your chaotic self, but sometimes he wondered what you would be like if you weren't so chaotic. But in the end he always thought...You were perfect just the way you were, and he would always love you for who you are.

[namor-shuri]

Your tags on my venn diagram post are gold and should be a fic.

LMAOOO not me forgetting y’all read my tags 😭 Look, your venn diagram is accurate af and I really hope you bless us with more. The world wants to see these talented men come together and team up on a project [or in my case, tag team me]. But hey, I support both scenarios. Your fic comment got me thinking “what if I actually wrote a fantasy, porn without plot one shot about them?” So then I attempted it [HEAVY on attempt because I haven’t written a fic before 🥲] But here goes nothing *gulps*. Hope you like it op! @scruffylookingpiratecaptain 💗 *deletes my entire account and moves across state lines afterwards* lol

- - - - - - - - x x x - - - - - - - -

Gael Bernal Diego Luna Tenoch Huerta Pedro Pascal Oscar Isaac

“I want to fuck like we’re filming in the valley.”

**Warnings/ Disclaimers: NSFW, 18+, group sex, language, fiction [this is only intended to be fantasy], porn without plot**

We have a routine down. They stop by my apartment Friday night, fuck me, we eat together, and then they leave. Repeat. No cuddles. No pillow talk. No strings attached. No bullshit. Just straight fucking. I would be lying through my teeth if I said I didn’t develop feelings somewhere along the way for each and every one of them, but I’ll take that to my grave.

It wasn’t always like this.

It first started off with just Tenoch and I. We met one another through a drunk threesome one night after a friend’s birthday party. We instantly clicked and he quickly learned how to turn me on. The man could make me cum round after round till I forgot my first and last name. He knew all the right buttons to push and he got me hooked on him quickly. His dick game drove me insane and I hated that it admittedly elevated my standards for any man who was blessed to be entangled in my sheets. We became a casual “friends with benefits” type of a situation until one day he wanted to spice things up between us.

“Have you ever had sex with more than one guy at the same time?” He asks me out of the blue while we chill at a nearby cafe.

To my surprise, he wanted to add more guys to the mix. I wasn’t opposed to the idea but was honestly a little concerned at first.

“I want to watch other guys fuck you while I take part. That would be so fucking hot, you know? And I promise you would be safe, no funny business. I know these guys. They’re good guys, trust me. What do you think?”

Call me a whore. Lonely. Bored. A pick me. A girl with daddy issues. Some twenty-something big tit wide-eyed naive bitch finding intimacy in all the wrong places. Whatever. I could care less. I don’t need the judgement from my girlfriends, friends, family, or coworkers and I sure as hell don’t need it from you. The only thing that was running through my mind in that very moment was having an adventure and so I kept our little arrangement to myself. No one has to know.

I sipped my drink watching him over the rim of my cup. He met my gaze with those curious eyes of his like he was trying to read my mind. I looked down and smirked, finally swallowing.

“I’m in.”

*bzzzzz*

Like clockwork, Tenoch always came by my apartment first. I opened the door to the sight of this goober holding a pack of beers and striking a funny pose with damp curls. He must of showered before heading over because he smelled heavenly.

“Hey beautiful.” He kissed my forehead then waltzed right in, draping his stuff over a nearby chair.

We made small talk about his shit boss and how she underpays her staff. “And now she’s doing layoffs!” In this economy?? I crack open a couple of beers for us and hear the doorbell ring. “Tenoch, can you get that?” Diego and Oscar are here. Funny enough, they live in another apartment complex only a couple of streets down. What are the odds, right? Shockingly it’s not weird, but hopefully it stays that way.

Tenoch throws a movie on while I pop open a bag of chips Oscar brought over. Gael swings by next and as always, without fail, Pedro comes last. Hours later, I might add!

“Sorry for the delay guys, I had an emergency come up.”

We all boo him in unison while Tenoch throws a cheeto at his head.

“I don’t deserve this abuse! I promise I have a good excuse this time.” Pedro chuckles, dodging another chip successfully.

Yeah don’t feel bad for him. This fucker always has an “emergency”. He couldn’t be on time if his actual life depended on it.

“Blah blah blah. Just hurry up and sit down. You’re interrupting an important part of the movie dipshit. Mulan is meeting Mushu.” Oscar excitedly motions him over to the couch like we all haven’t seen this masterpiece 50+ times already.

I giggle and look around at everyone enjoying themselves. I have a lot of fun with them. I mean outside of our little scheduled orgy we got going on, I truly enjoy their companionship. I know they have my back and I have theirs. I wouldn’t dare be sappy and say this out loud but I love these guys and would do anything for them.

What’s wild to me is even though we have made this a routine by now, they still get shy around me before we start. No one wants to make me feel uncomfortable and I appreciate that more than they’ll ever know, but someone has to have the balls to make the first move. Thankfully, Diego does. He starts to massage the back of my neck while we all laugh at Mushu screaming “dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow!” He looks over at me and notices me purr in approval. While his hand works out the kinks in my neck, he leans in and sensually kisses the side of my neck licking all the way up to my earlobe, catching it in between his teeth. He whispers sweet nothings in my ear about how gorgeous I am and how he can satisfy me better than any of these so called “men” here. I know it’s all for the fantasy factor but fuck does it turn me on. Only I can hear his ramblings and that gets me even hotter. He invades my personal space and breathes me in deep. I tilt my head and expose my throat to him like a cat on it’s back surrendering. Mark me, Diego. I start to squirm in my seat. I can feel my wetness already pooling in my panties.

My whimpers play over the movie and Oscar proceeds to join in on the fun. He directs my attention towards him and softly cups my cheek before going in for a blistering kiss. I close my eyes and let him lick into my mouth greedily. I surrender to his demanding touch while Diego starts to leave a trail of hickeys from my neck down to my clavicle.

Gael gets up from the other side of the couch and kneels down in front of me. He carefully unties my shoes and slips off my socks. He starts to caress my legs and massage my feet, looking up at me with heat behind his eyes. I watch his eyes shift to peek underneath my skirt. I’m trying to get friction to my clit by grinding my thighs together but Gael holds my legs in place with a strong grip. He then slides his hands slowly up my thighs till he gets to his destination. He hooks his finger over the top of my lingerie and brings them down one inch at a time, leaving a trail of hot kisses along the way.

I shutter as the air immediately exposes my wetness, revealing my sweet arousal. Gael finally slips my panties off and takes in its dampness. Oscar distracts me by gliding his hand over my breasts till he settles on my neck, roughly gripping my throat while he licks up into my ear.

I yelp.

“Be gentle.” Tenoch possessively asserts while he comes over and starts to pull his shirt over his head, exposing his happy trail and tattoo.

“Calm down. I’m only doing what the slut likes.” Oscar counters, looking over at Tenoch with a challenging stare before directing his sexual frustration back to me.

“Isn’t that right, baby? I want to hear you beg for Daddy.” He taunts while I make eye contact with him through submissive eyes. I’m thoroughly turned on right now and he knows it. Oscar’s tight grip on my neck is sending me over the edge and I want more. I need more. His authority is sending waves of pleasure through out my entire body and my hair raises on my arms. My pierced nipples start to harden and peak through my shirt and a wave of desire goes straight to my cunt.

Diego ceases to kiss my shoulder and looks down at my pebbled flesh.

“Well, would you look at that. Our brat likes to be choked.”

Diego goes to undress my top half and unclasps my bra with a swiftness. My breasts spill out of their cups one by one and he fondles one nipple as he laps up the other in his mouth eagerly. My breath hitches. I bite my lip, holding in a strangled noise.

Pedro moves over to my line of vision and begins to unbotton his pants in front of me, giving me a show. He starts touching himself as we lock eyes and creates a mess in his jeans. He whips out his exuding member and I shamelessly stare, taking in all of its glory. He watches me watch him and delights in the attention. This fucker.

“You like what you see, sweetheart? It’s all yours, just be a good girl and open your mouth wide for me.”

I love it when he calls me his good girl and tells me what to do. He doesn’t repeat himself twice. Ever. Whatever Pedro wants, Pedro gets. I pay the consequence if I misbehave. But God, do I love misbehaving.

I don’t budge one inch and go to kiss Oscar, dismissing Pedro’s very existence. That sets him off. Mission accomplished.

“Alright, play times over Princess.” he snarls.

Pedro yanks me away from Diego and Oscar by my hair and forces me forward to the edge of the couch, bringing me at eye level with his hardened cock. He holds my head firm in place as he steadily rubs his throbbing wood over my lips, painting them with his pre-cum. His breath goes ragged and his composure quickly diminishes. He wants this badly, but so do I. Pedro shoves his dick past my lips to the back of my throat without warning and I can see his pupils blow from his dominance over me. He tastes like sea salt and musk. I bring my hands up to grip his shaft and brace myself on his waist, sliding back and forth. He’s rough with me and forces me all the way down till my nose touches his pubes. I gag and my eyes starts to water. He finally releases his grip on me, and I exhale and spit on his dick. I go in for seconds and savor the taste, licking circles around his sensitive tip.

“Ah, just like that.” He affirms, letting his head fall back.

Everyone moves to claim a piece of my flesh to grab, squeeze, suck or fuck. I aspire to be their personal fuck toy to use and abuse for their own selfish gain. Is that too much to ask for?

Oscar repositions me on the couch so that I’m flat on my back as I resume sucking Pedro off. He pushes my skirt up out of the way and coats his fingers with saliva. He begins to slick up my folds, steadily working his way into my tight entrance. “Look at you.” He coos. He kneels down and without hesitation shoves his face into my juices and begins to devour me whole. He licks a line from my tight asshole to my sopping pussy lips and engulfs my clit with his large tongue. He hums around it, sending a wave of vibration to my core.

I loudly moan with Pedro’s penis down my throat, generating a low growl from him. I take him out of my mouth and start to plead as Oscar relentlessly works my sensitive clit with no sign of letting up. He sets my body aflame with little to no effort and it’s truly diabolical.

Tenoch comes to my side and begins to gently massage my breasts, bending down and taking one nipple in his mouth while he jerks himself off. Oscar prys my legs open to stop me from squirming. The overwhelming sensation of his scruff on my bundle of nerves is killing me and the mix of pain and pleasure is intoxicating. Gael grabs my calf and begins to suck my toes, one by one while touching himself. He closes his eyes and takes his time savoring them greedily. He sucks and sucks like he’s making love to them and perverted noises start to fill up the room. My body riddles with ecstasy and the heat in my lower belly grows.

Diego squeezes some lube on his hand and continues to jerk himself off while watching this provocative scene unfold in front of him. He comes over to my side and replaces his hand with mine on his leaking erection. I slowly jerk him off while not breaking eye contact with him.

I can feel my arousal taking over. My brain is having trouble functioning and focusing on one particular thing at once. I am incoherent. I know I definitely heard my phone go off three separate times by now. Mulan is already beating Shan Yu’s ass on the roof. My AC unit turned off about an hour ago and it’s hot as shit in here. But none of these distractions matter to me right now. My ears tune into the sweet symphony of their joint moans and hisses, while I witness their hungry eyes fixate on me, mouths slightly parted in a fucked out bliss. The air is thick with sweat, sex and sin.

I come to and feel Oscar between my legs as I jerk Diego off with purpose while Pedro tilts my head towards him and fucks into my mouth, panting with each thrust. I create a tight vacuum, swallowing him with intense suction that my lips create a *pop* sound when I let go. He curses under his breath in satisfaction.

Tenoch breaks things up and takes control. He grabs hold of me and tears me away from everyone’s touch. He picks me up with one arm and lays back on the couch’s sweaty surface before positioning me on top of him. I straddle his waist and lean down for a kiss, exchanging fluids in a raunchy french kiss. He matches my energy and sucks on my tongue. Fuck, he’s such a freak. We continue to make out as he reaches over my ass and rubs my entrance in a circular motion, slowly dragging his thick digits along my folds. Tenoch replaces his fingers with his slick dick and coats his penis in my juices before tapping himself on my clit. Oscar prepared me for the taking and Tenoch is about to have his way with me. His thick cock promptly slides right into my walls and we moan in each other’s mouths. I’m convinced my vagina was made to please him. I try and adjust to his thickness, slowly making room for his size. My greedy cunt eventually swallows him whole. He gasps in approval. I dig my nails into his big chest as I begin to ride him, throwing my head back. Oscar promptly grabs my neck from behind and whispers nasty shit in my ear while I take Tenoch’s cock like a good girl. Tenoch holds onto my waist with a bruising grip, displaying his possessiveness over me. He sits up on one elbow and sucks my sensitive nipples, playing with my piercing with his tongue in a circle motion. My cunt flutters around him, making him buck.

Goosebumps break out all over my skin as a chill runs down my spine. I whine loudly, succumbing to my pleasure in waves. The sounds of Tenoch’s dick slamming into my tight hole as my ass cheeks hit his pelvis is delicious and it makes me wetter each thrust. He’s giving it to me so good right now but Oscar decides to test how much I can truly take at once.

He cups my ass and halts my bouncing. Tenoch’s member slowly slides out. He grabs my cheeks and spreads me wide, admiring the stretch of my asshole and vagina with his tight grip. Oscar leans in and dips his tongue in and out of both holes, indulging in my natural taste. He pulls back and spits on my tight asshole. He sucks his thumb first before bringing his slick finger to my hole, spreading his spit in a circular motion. Oscar deepens the pressure until his thumb successfully slides in.

A raspy moan leaves my lips and I cry out.

“Mmmm I know baby, I know. Daddy knows what to do.“ He confidently mutters between pants. He’s so turned on right now.

He spits on his pointer and middle finger next, slipping in two digits and stretching me out. His calculated process is driving me crazy and my thighs tremble around Tenoch’s waist. I gasp and stop sucking and jerking off Pedro and Diego, focusing on my breathing.

“Don’t be greedy Oscar, there’s enough of her to go around.” Tenoch gripes, assisting in spreading my cheeks to give Oscar better access. I whimper in anticipation.

Oscar continues to work open my hole with a squirt of lube, fucking me with his fingers until he deems I’m ready for his thick shaft. I grow impatient.

“Ah…f-fuck me Oscar, please. I need you!”

Pedro starts to laugh.

“Stop playing with your food Oscar. The lady is getting tired of you.”

“I thought you like when Daddy plays with you, baby.” Oscar taunts before spontaneously slapping both of my ass cheeks one by one, again and again and again. Left. Right. Left. Right. He spanks me so hard that the pain becomes unbearable. Tenoch proceeds to choke me, holding my neck in place. I scream but no sound comes out. My voice is hoarse from sucking and fucking. Gael ducks down and starts to suck on my nipple while twisting the other between two fingers, playing with its jewelry.

Once he deems me ready, Oscar takes his throbbing wood in hand and aligns his coated head with my stretched hole. He grabs some lube one last time, lathers me up and slides in. He takes his time to make sure he doesn’t hurt me but I want it now. He relishes in my tightness and cusses under his breath. Tenoch licks his fingers and lubricates my pussy with his saliva before re-entering me. My eyes roll back with the overstimulation of being filled to the brim. They start to move together in unison and I resume bouncing on both Tenoch’s and Oscar’s dicks together. Oscar looks down, watching himself go in and out of my ass, cheeks bouncing back on his pelvis and jiggling. He bites his lip from the glorious sight.

“Fuck y-your so tight…ah-“ They both rant together.

Sounds of skin slapping skin echo throughout my entire apartment and Oscar steadily grips my shoulder while Tenoch grabs my waist. I feel like I am being split in two as my holes stretch and adjust to being double penetrated. A bitch is on cloud nine and I can barely string two sentences together. They are deep in my guts and I think I’m going to black out from the overwhelming sensation. This is a ride I never want to get off of. Tenoch picks up the pace and fucks up into me with no mercy while Oscar follows suit. He looks determined, sweat dripping down his forehead. Tenoch gawks at my bouncing breasts in his face, matching the fast pace. He reaches down and thumbs my clit.

My orgasm is on the rise and I can feel my climax is near.

“Daddy, I’m….I’m close!” I moan.

Gael lets go of my breast and runs to grab my vibrator from my bedroom. He turns it to the setting I like and places it close to Tenoch’s groan so that it’s touching my clit at the right angle. He looks up at me as my mouth falls open. I’m slowly becoming undone and can’t hold on any longer.

Diego makes the split decision to get up on the couch and position himself in line to face fuck me. He holds my hair as I bounce and proceeds to have his way with me. I moan around his dick as spit pools and drips down my chin. Pedro leans down and fondles a breast while biting one nipple just the way I like it.

It was truly a sight to see. A real group effort. The one group project where everybody wins. My question is why didn’t we think to film any of this and post it to porn sites world wide or only fans and make millions?? You should have seen us! We fucked like real professionals. I could see it now: “Sexy whore takes 5 big cocks like a champ” as the title. Hmmm. Now that I think about it, we would have probably ran into some copyright issues with Mulan playing in the background. The “A girl worth fighting for” song blasting at full volume was a nice touch though.

I feel myself choking on his penis and Diego reminds me to breath through my nostrils as he shoves my head forward. He yanks me off of his dick to give me a second to breath and a string of saliva connects from my lips to his tip. He slaps me a bit and roughly grabs my cheeks. Diego leans in for a sloppy kiss and purrs “that’s my fucking slut.” He’s genuinely proud of me.

“Now suck!” He demands and plunges back into my mouth without any hesitation. He’s pumping me so fucking good while his thrusts start to become sporadic and his breath goes ragged. I know he’s close. He slips his throbbing dick out of my mouth and readjusts so that I give his neglected balls some lovin. He bites his lip in approval.

“I’m cumming…I’m cu-“ Tenoch goes silent as he spills his hot seed deep into my swollen pussy. My vagina pulses around him as I feel him paint my walls. I shake involuntarily as he comes down off of his high. His dick slides out of me and goes limp, while his seed leaks down my thigh. He lays there catching his breath as everyone continues to use me for their own satisfaction. He watches me bounce on top of him as Oscar continues to pound me from behind.

I quickly follow suit and climax hard, squirting all over Tenoch with Oscar deep in my ass, Pedro sucking my nipple rings hard, Gael rubbing my clit with my vibrator on high and Diego stuffing his balls in my mouth.

Everyone let’s go of me for a second as I buckle and grip Tenoch’s chest before completely collapsing on top of him. All of my energy leaves my body. He catches me in his arms and caresses my back, making sure I’m okay. He kisses my forehead and I feel his chest rise and fall.

Once my breath evens out, I look up and see everyone staring at me with concern. The Mulan end credits continue to roll on the TV. I sheepishly look around and immediately get shy in front of them for the first time.

“So…..round two?”

- - - - - - - - x x x - - - - - - - -

[itsbeenclaireified]

So at the end of July I did RAGBRAI, Register’s Annual Great Bike Ride Across Iowa. And it took a while for me to like…mentally recover from this one? Which was then like tough/disappointing to feel like I had to?

So what happened was on the very first day my dad and I crashed our tandem recumbent bike 3 times. We spend like 4-5 hours just trying to get the patch to hold and get rolling, but it just wasn’t working. And on the last crash we both got injured (dad some road rash and muscle soreness, me landed hard on me knee).

So we limped into camp (me literally limping) and my mom graciously drove several hours down to us with her bike and my dad’s bike. So we biked the rest of the week on those.

And that’s how I learned that I didn’t know a lot of stuff about long distance biking. I’ve always biked these long repetitive distances on a recumbent bike. But like day 3 on the upright bike I was experiencing a level of chafing I had never experienced before because I’m an idiot and didn’t know you shouldn’t have cotton underwear under your bike shorts.

So that chafing day I biked 45 miles and then my bike popped its tire, and that freaked me out and my whole body hurt and my knee was better but not great (it did okay on the bike but not walking around). So I bailed, and I’m both glad I did and also was like wow weak of you.

Which is rude of me to think??? Like I had biked 85 miles 4500vertical the previous day, but I thought I was like just not mentally tough enough to get thru it??

And the second to last day I also just decided to not bike because my hands were staying numb, and I just needed a break. And I had a great day recovering, but lord the ol noggin was like “are you listening to your body? Or are you a baby backed bitch giving up?”

And I think I was listening to by body, because here I am 5 weeks later and my fingers are finally not tingly anymore. And I’ve been to PT consult now and he thinks I have a bone contusion and that I didn’t fuck up my meniscus. Which is what I was hoping to hear, because I don’t want to fuck up my knee joint if I can avoid it. But also like …lol, what a weird vibe to HOPE for a bone contusion. And my knee still sort of aches but it’s still getting better.

So yeah there were good times, but mostly this Ragbrai was a fucking slog and was hard and then I was sad/disappointed that I didn’t have like a transformative happy experience. And a podcast I listened to used a phrase of “putting a ceiling on your suffering” where you can just…stop. Like you can be like my body is hurting and I don’t have to keep pushing. And I guess I’m glad I have learned that lesson. But it was tough.

And then I turned 32 and I was like dude my body and I did that together and it was scary that things could have been worse. Or like that could have been an injury that gives me a trick knee for the rest of my life, and so I’m thankful to past me that has done a bunch of pre-hab strengthening work to keep my acl protected etc.

Anyway, I avoided posting about Ragbrai because I had such complex feelings about it. But now I’m more ready to celebrate the accomplishment that it still was.

[peace-coast-island]

Diary of a Junebug

Rustic pumpkins, poppy honey tea leaves, and wild talismans in the Baozhou Forest

The Baoshou Forest is said to be home to many lost and wandering spirits who need a place to stay while they figure things out before finally crossing over into the afterlife. Since her family has been performing rituals for the deceased for generations, Tao pretty much knows the forest like the back of her hand. She always keeps some items in hand to help a wandering spirit out, either by helping them sort out affairs, perform a ceremony to give them closure, or just be there for them when they need to get a lot off their chest.

Like her predecessors, she too is a regular visitor in the forest, someone a wayward spirit can turn to when they need guidance. Although she doesn’t always have an answer, Tao does her best to help out. Sure, she may seem quirky in a morbid and creepy lighthearted way that often rubs people the wrong way, but I think you kinda have to be like that when your family’s line of work is dealing with death. It’s not like she’s desensitized or is like “tee-hee, death and coffins, lol we’re all gonna die someday,” - more like her “normal” is clearly different, so her openly talking and even joking about death isn’t unusual, but to others, they see it as weird, and maybe even insensitive.

She’s used to it though, so it’s not a big deal since it’s usually coming from those who don’t know her well. However, she does try to be tactful, and she takes her duties seriously when it comes to burying the dead and sending them off to the afterlife. Some find her a walking contradiction, she says she doesn’t get it because people are complex and fascinating creatures. I agree, some people just don’t get it - or maybe they just prefer thinking in terms of black and white.

Before coming up here, we actually stopped by Meishui Village to meet up with some of Sophea’s clients. Shuyi and Lifeng live up there, which is considered unusual since it’s the countryside, and Lifeng’s family are in Yuexing Harbor - so that’s a bit of a commute. Somehow, Lifeng’s sister is able to go back and forth a couple times a week, though now that the engagement’s official, she’s making arrangements to move closer by.

We didn’t get to meet her unfortunately, but I’ve heard a lot of good things about her, like how she’s taken Shuyi under her wing and giving her the love and support her own family never gave her. She was the one who recommended Sophea when Shuyi found out that her father forged her mother’s will, taking away what little she had left behind that was supposed to be rightfully hers and keeping that for himself. Her father had resented his first wife and eldest daughter, and because Shuyi also happens to be disabled, he used that to justify his abuse towards her, which is really fucked up. His second wife and daughter treated her the same way, with absolutely no compassion or kindness towards her.

So her parents made a fool of themselves in court, failing to convince the public why people like Shuyi should be hidden away from the world for not being useful enough for society and a bunch of other bullshit. By then, Shuyi had been living with Lifeng for several months and was learning how to stand up for herself, so she surprised everyone by telling her father off when he threw a temper tantrum over the final verdict. That turned out to be the last time she ever saw her parents as they committed suicide that night, refusing to take responsibility and cursing Shuyi until the very end.

As for Shuyi’s younger sister from her father’s second marriage, she had disappeared when her parents were found dead. Months earlier, she attempted to sabotage Shuyi and Lifeng in some last ditch attempt to elevate her family’s failing status. It failed, and the consequences were dire as the Yulin clan fell even further. Those events actually led to Shuyi meeting her mother’s family and discovering the will as she was finally able to freely contact them. Around that time, Yan had been exiled somewhere in the mountains for a community service type of thing such as cleaning up litter and tending to the plants. She remained there until a few days before the final verdict, presumably taken away by her parents.

When her parents were found, a search was conducted, though it was believed that Shuyi’s sister was likely dead too. But with no body, it was all circumstantial, and the authorities kinda left it at that because it seemed kinda straightforward. Not to mention that by then, Shuyi just wanted to sever her ties with her family completely, which is totally understandable.

Then a few weeks ago, her sister suddenly showed up out of nowhere when Shuyi and Lifeng’s sister went to the forest to pick poppy honey leaves. Shuyi wandered off near the river to pick some lotuses when her sister confronted her. She almost didn’t recognize her, describing her as a once beautiful girl with an extravagant fashion sense - so basically, a superficial rich girl who likes to show off by flaunting her looks - to looking disheveled and wearing old, worn clothes while having a look of pure anger in her eyes that gave her chills.

Next thing she knew, her sister grabbed her by the shoulders to the point that she woke up the next day with her left side bruised and sore. Shuyi wasn’t sure if she was trying to push her in the river or if her sister’s hands were gonna move to her throat. Part of the reason why Shuyi wears a somewhat elaborate necklace is to cover the scars from when her sister strangled her - that same incident that got her banished to the mountains.

Like her parents, Shuyi’s sister also screamed curses at her, blaming her for her current predicament and the sorry state of their family’s name. Shuyi somehow managed to break away from her sister’s grip and told her to leave. She didn’t listen and started pulling at Shuyi, who fought back for the first time, which probably threw her sister off guard. So she got angrier and even more violent, forcing Shuyi to act in self defense by pushing her into the water where they both went down just as Lifeng’s sister was about to intervene.

Shuyi wound up with a mild concussion from hitting her head when she fell. Her sister wasn’t as lucky and died from her injuries when she landed on a bunch of sharp rocks. The whole thing wound up being anticlimactic, which is probably for the best. Shuyi can’t help but wonder if her sister was trying to get a rise out of her on purpose because she felt it was different from all the other times she taunted and bullied her. After all, when you have nothing left to lose, some people just flip out and say or do whatever because they know they’re going down and refuse to accept that. Basically like throwing a tantrum, except it’s a grown ass person who can’t take no for an answer and makes that everyone’s problem.

Well, what’s done is done and Shuyi can finally leave her past behind for good. She’s a lot happier now that she’s no longer in their shadows and instead surrounded by people who genuinely love and accept her, shortcomings and all. And not only that, they also treat her like an actual, living human being with feelings and thoughts rather than some object to be ridiculed or talked down at. I’d say good riddance - the world doesn’t need anymore people like them.

Through Sophea, Shuyi and Cerise became good friends as they have a lot in common, especially in terms of growing up with a shitty family who saw them as nothing but a burden because of their disabilities. They’ve both taken a couple pages from each other’s books in terms of gathering up the courage how to stand up for themselves and live life on their own terms. They can’t help being who they are and if some people can’t accept that, seeing them as a burden on society and whatnot - well, like it or not, disabled people exist and they are a part of society, just like any other human being.

Along with Cerise, Saff and Nikolai stopped by to meet up with Shuyi, Sophea, and Lifeng too. Sophea was a great help to the three of them when people from their past started digging up skeletons in order to discredit their accomplishments. Although the three of them came from different walks of life, they wound up being an adventurer team thanks to a chance meeting at a bar on a crowded night that somehow turned into a drunken therapy session - the one common thread bringing them together was the fact that they were tired of being constantly fucked over by close ones who they thought they could trust.

Tao has also become well acquainted with the adventuring trio during her excursions to the Baozhou Forest. In fact, the four of them made a trip up there last week to hang up some talismans after hearing complaints from locals about a spike in unusual supernatural activity in a certain area. Stuff like that happens once in a while, so if it starts to become a concern, the adventurer’s guild usually finds someone to take care of it.

At first, Tao picked that commission out of boredom, only to find out that it wasn’t just talismans, but some restless spirits who needed guidance as well - and monsters lurking in the darkness acting strange for unknown reasons. A quick visit to check out the situation told her to bring some extra hands because there’s no way she’d be able to fight a bunch of agitated monsters, set up talismans, and perform rites all by herself. Yeah, there’s no way anyone can get all that done in a day - even someone as energetic as her.

Then on the way home, she stopped by Meishui, where she ran into Nikolai, Saff, and Cerise. They talked, she told them about the situation in the forest, and they offered to accompany her. The three of them happen to be well versed with the supernatural - Nikolai and Saff being seasoned adventurers while most of Cerise’s knowledge comes from a mentor when she was in school, someone who hailed from a family of exorcists and taught her the basics on that. So Nikolai and Saff did most of the monster fighting while Tao and Cerise dealt with the restless spirits. Together, they were able to find the source that was causing the unrest and put a stop to that. Finally, once all of that was done, Tao performed a ceremony, and they put talismans around the area. All in a good day’s work.

About a week has gone by, and so they went back up there to check and make sure that there were no further disturbances or anything else that would be concerning. So far, so good - nothing out of the ordinary has happened and the talismans are still in good condition. Since they made the trip up here, why not take it easy and hang around for a bit? Along with poppy honey flowers, rustic pumpkins are in season too, so aside from visiting some friends, we also wanted to visit the forest for that.

Rustic pumpkins are kinda like a hybrid between kabocha and butternut squash. They’re known as rustic pumpkins because they’re popular outside of Yuexing. It’s mostly the elders that call them their actual name, which is hard to pronounce, and with English being the common language, it just somehow became known as rustic pumpkins.

I’m no linguist but I do find languages in general to be fascinating. Somehow that doesn’t translate well into motivating me to actually get down and really learn a language (Khmer, ahem). And in the Celestine Onyx, which is a sort of jurisdiction of seven different countries with their own languages, cultures, and customs, it’s interesting getting to know the people there and how they’re all kinda interconnected with each other.

In terms of languages, English is the common language because that’s how they’re able to communicate with each other. Then there’s also their second language, which to simply things I’ll just call it their native tongue, and that’s widely spoken, usually among locals, and that too has its own regional differences. So in Yuexing, it’s Mandarin, Sango -Japanese, Marippe - French, Adrikha - Arabic, Sazona - Spanish, Melovka - Russian. Then in Bonsai, it’s kinda a mix of everything. And usually, in the bigger cities or places where you’d generally find more travelers, they mainly speak English. Then in places like Meishui, it’s kinda like 50/50, so you’d hear conversations in English - usually among the younger folk - and Mandarin - usually between family or the elders.

Anyway, so rustic pumpkins have many uses, though they’re more for dishes outside of Yuexing culture. Rustic pumpkin and salmon pie is well known in Marippe, which is to the northeast, and that takes elements from the cuisine of both cultures. They’re both known for seafood, though they obviously prepare and serve it in different ways. A while ago, I heard a funny story about Ruby getting caught off guard by the amount of chilis in a shrimp dish she tried in Yuexing while on a mission with Connie and her brothers. Thanks to her experience, Aurelie was careful to avoid a similar incident as she too can’t take spice too well either - Yuexing cuisine really goes hard on the heat! Also, Xiang making mods to her own spin on various dishes she grew up eating or else most of us - myself included - wouldn’t be able to enjoy her country’s food.

Then there’s poppy honey flowers, which are mainly used for tea. And like with Marippe, tea’s big here in Yuexing, which they also have their own spin on. Me being Asian, I kinda have a bias for Asian teas, like the kinds that don’t need milk or sugar added in. Not that I’m a purist or anything, I just grew up drinking tea like that and I prefer drinking it that way - with exceptions being like boba tea, or if maybe the tea has no flavor or is way too strong, aka not good. Marippe has good teas too, and it’s made me appreciate tea with milk, cream, sugar, and other sweet add ons that can elevate a tea, but overall, I think I tend to gravitate towards teas that don’t need anything added to it.

Poppy honey tea is a black tea with a natural sweetness to it, so no need to add anything to that. Soy milk may be added if the black tea flavor’s a bit too strong - again, down to personal preferences. For me, I don’t think it’s necessary. I’m a black tea girlie, so I’m a bit biased towards Yuexing, Sango, and Adrikha. Green tea’s good too, but I think I’m more into matcha. White, I think it depends, I just kinda find the flavor lacking in general. And fruity or floral teas, I’m kinda picky about them as they can be a hit or miss. Strong floral flavors aren’t my jam while fruit teas I find taste better iced and with some sweetener.

We kinda had a debate on whether we’re team black tea or green tea, and we ended up in the middle. I’d say why pit these two bad bitches against each other? (Ignore my black tea bias earlier). Poppy honey is used mainly for black tea, though it’s popular with green tea too, though that’s mainly outside of Yuexing. Both are good, though, and I like having options because sometimes your preferences depend on what you’re in the mood for.

Right now, I’m in the mood for black tea because, I don’t know, something about being out here in the countryside makes it feel suitable for the occasion.

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