#i am not an exclusionist

[cleverusername01]

pride month is getting to be a little much this year. I mean love is love and everything but what the FUCK is “bijective”

[swords-and-chaos]

Shout out to all of y’all who are happily or unhappily single for this upcoming Valentine’s Day! Society is gonna try to tell you that it’s wrong, or something to be sad about, but this is your reminder that you don’t need another person to love you to be loved/worthy of love! Special shout out to all of you aro and/or ace spec folks! Just because you don’t/don’t want to have someone to spend the day with doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it! Chocolate is going to be cheap in the following days! Do something nice for yourself.

[transmaverique]

amab and afab, if they were used as shorthand for the actual full phrases that they signify, with emphasis on the "assigned" part, and an understanding that they are enforcements of normative (ie, dyadic and cisgender and binary) sex, would be like. really useful. but people took the terms and started using them as shorthand FOR normative sex instead of the ENFORCEMENT OF normative sex. so when other trans people (almost always dyadic trans people) ask for your agab they are almost always asking for your Original Genital Situation. your starting point, so to say. and the reason FOR asking is also almost always bc they are trying to also enforce a certain kind of normativity within queer spaces (which is stupid bc being queer is inherently non-normative but here we are). like, you cant be a lesbian if you're ftm, bc you ARE m, so if you ARE a lesbian, then that means you're lying about some aspect of your identity. does that make sense?

it is always always always incredibly.... i do not trust dyadic trans people that use cagab terms, even moreso than i do not trust dyadic trans people that just use agab terms. agab is also coopted intersex language, but the "coercive" part of cagab SPECIFICALLY refers to medical "intervention" of intersex characteristics, such as "corrective" surgeries and hrt. i am deeply fucking suspicious of any dyadic trans person that uses those terms exactly the same as described above, even moreso if they do so bc "all gender is coercive".

like. yeah. that's true. but you use these terms to erase and overtake intersex discussions on the medical abuse of intersex infants. and i cant help but wonder why you would feel the need to do that.

[cupcraft]

"Um sorry you're "partner" is [insert a queer label] erm well does your um "partner" mind telling me their dating and sexual history and relationship to it and also the intricacies of their gender! Just gotta make sure they're using the label right of course 😁💥"

^ how some exclusionists would sound IRL and yes it gensrs sounds fucking stupid

[npc-tess]

It's crazy being an aroace on tumblr nowadays.

Not only do aroaces still have to fight for acceptance (like every other a-spectrum identity, we all struggle together) but now they are also the ones being bashed on & disrespected by their own community. Now that we finally see breadcrumbs of representation, it feels like the a-spec community turned against each other.

People are acknowledging our existence and just happen to understand/accept/tolerate aroaces more than other a-spec identities. Which is actually a very good first step but also not barely enough. And it seems that especially aros and aces separately feel neglected. Which is very valid. Being aroallo or alloace or non-sam means being overlooked and frowned upon. I understand that. Hell, being aplatonic, afamilial or any other a-spec identity is sometimes even harder, I understand that. But starting to fight against your own people? I will never understand that. It’s aro posts including sentences like “don’t reblog with ace or aroace” or ace folks jabbing against aros in passing. It’s posts screaming in capslock that “being aro and ace are two different things!1!!”. This is the hate and negativity aroace people see.

I personally can’t scroll through the aro tag anymore without feeling unwelcome. Posts I relate to and would love to reblog are clearly stated to not be meant for me. Because I am aroace, an identity they don’t… like? don’t want to engage with? I don’t know. What I know is that it feels like aroace people and the experiences they share (which happen to reach allos), are the reason only aros (or only aces) are oppressed.

Why is there a need to hurt your own community? You are allowed to vent, to feel ignored, be angry and sad. But why do people go out of their way to hurt their own community while doing so? What did aroace people do that aros and aces started to push them away?

There was a big Community of A-spectrum identities once. Nowadays it feels more like everyone desperately wants nothing to do with the other. Which is the most counterproductive thing we can do.

I am proud of being aroace. I adore my community. They just seem to not adore me anymore.

[headcanontheshitoutofsoulsborne]

Sir Vilhelm is a he/him lesbian.

[edwardallenpoe]

*when I see photos of butches carabiners linked together* me: I'm fine I'm fine I'm okay it's okay I'm fine this is great I'm so great I'm okay today is a good day you're having a great time life is good-

(terf's/radfem's/nsfw dni)

[finalhaunts]

Since I have some (very reasonable) concerns about ace discourse possibly making a return thanks to recent events, I'd like to remind everyone (and myself) that majority of the time the pointless infighting and drama you see among queers really only happens online. If you go to a pride parade as an ace and/or aro nobody is gonna give two shits besides like, terfs and high schoolers who very clearly grew up online. And if one of those two parties DO approach you and give you shit for it i guarantee all the other queers there will defend you. Nobody normal actually cares this much about shit in real life and most of the community understands that; the vocal portion that do care that much don't have much power over the community outside of their echo chambers online, because they know if they just go out in the middle of a queer event and start attacking people they're gonna be the ones getting their teeth knocked out. So like. Don't let anything you read on this website make you think otherwise.

Anyways, aros and aces are queer (yes even the cishet ones), people with confusing/contradictory identities come over here and kiss me on my mouth, etc.

[babycharmander]

Love seeing posts that are like “%^&@ people for daring to talk about ace discourse!!!” and then you go to their blog and you find out they’re saying this not because they���re an aspec who was traumatized by that awfulness, but because they actively participated in the aphobic side of the “discourse,” never apologized for it, and still hold onto aphobic beliefs and hate being told (correctly) that their behavior is atrocious.

[aroanthy]

being gay and aromantic is wild because people will accuse you of hating gay people because you (checks notes) wish people would be a little more critical of romance as a patriarchal structure. the thing is that rgu literally does this, it examines and interrogates how romance is a patriarchal structure. every time i talk about aromanticism in rgu people get very upset about that, as though aromanticism impedes queerness— i did not realise we were still doing exclusionism so bare faced. every time i talk about aromanticism, people get upset. im not even talking about it in relation to the show, instead making a general throwaway post about the weight that people afford anything that deals in Romance, and i get told that rgu is a romance and i should cry about it. like. what? rgu made me realise i was aromantic. i was already gay and that gave me the final piece of the puzzle.

to be gay and aromantic does not mean you Just Have Friends (? what does this even mean, let’s unpack this statement at a later date): to be gay and aromantic means myriad things for myriad people. it means queer sex, it means queer connections that aren’t defined as ‘romantic’, it means queer attraction, it means queer understanding. nothing about this devalues romantic queerness, though i must say that every time i post about aromanticism someone has to qualify my words with a statement about how romance is cool too. and sure, it is, but you can maybe understand how that’s exhausting when you actually want a meaningful conversation about your identity. anyway aromantic people i love you aromantic people and gay people i love you gay people (i am both. godbless goodnight)

[thee-radio-host-is-a-kookaburra]

perisex transmeds when you tell them to stop speaking over intersex people on intersex discussions that do not involve them

[rjalker]

genderdryad for your free exclusionist blocklist. Still hates pan people in 2024. As of literally 20 hours ago. Unbeleivable.

Edit: Wow, also hates mspec lesbians and endogenic systems. find one form of bigotry and the rest just spill out!

Also block:

parxgender

eternaspacic

[aethernalstars]

*drops this meme and leaves*

[allpplareequal]

With the growth of purity culture and the excessive amounts of exclusionism, accelerationism, sex negativity, witch-hunting, and general no-true-Scotsman-ing online and on Tumblr in particular, one can only conclude that online LGBTQIA+ communities have a serious conservatism problem that needs to be addressed.

We've already seen how this is harmful to our rights with the US election. The disunity and finger pointing not only lead to queer activists not being able to put any pressure on campaigns, but also lead a small amount of queer folks to either directly support trump or deliberately muddy the waters with anti voting activism.

The involvement of purity-poisoned queers (although there was certainly some astroturfing as well) in the harassment campaign against congresswoman Sarah McBride is worthy of an essay that I do not have the time or energy to make, but I will say that if she had received more immediate public support and was not surrounded by an all red government she likely would not have conceded to misgendering and bathroom bans.

We cannot keep defending our rights if we spend all of our time and energy policing our own community. The only reason we have been able to achieve what we have is because we put forward a united front, instead of taking the advice of terfs and fearing each other instead.

There is no "other" to lock out.

[lesboymetaknight]

Meta Knight and Galacta Knight are not only t4t, but also lesbians with one another, and still m/m.

[hella1975]

Do economics professors hate poor people

ironically every professor ive had has been very openly left. i can’t tell if it’s bc they have an understanding of economics and therefore know that hating poor people is a proven Bad Thing for the economy or if it’s bc my uni is very diverse 🤷🏻‍♀️