#i am just so tired

[proteidaes]

Manifesting ... good luck ...🍀🌟

--

photoshop

[omagpies]

Saw your suicidal ideation post and really related to how you put it. Sometimes it's already taking all you have just to keep living, doing anything extra is impossible. But your still living, and that's an accomplishment in itself. Do what you can, and sometimes what you have to, and take the breaks you need to keep going. Proud of you for being here ❤️

thank you 💗

[snovyda]

Big russian drone and missile attack is currently underway in Ukraine.

I've already heard explosions here in Kyiv, and more missiles are forecasted to come in the following few hours.

They will not stop until they are stopped.

[ramshacklefey]

Heyo! I'm havin' some thoughts lately about what it means to silence people/leave room for others to talk. This is largely spurred by posts I've personally seen where people are talking about transandrophobia and the erasure of trans men and mascs, but it applies to other situations as well.

The fact that trans men are often ignored by the wider queer community, the idea that we just don't experience "as much oppression" as other queer people (especially trans women), and the illusion that we're just rarer in general than trans women are things that I've been chewing on for years now. It's just that those ideas about trans men that I'd always felt but never exactly heard anyone say out loud outside of certain lesbian communities are suddenly popping up everywhere.

Simultaneously, more and more trans men are openly saying, "Hey, ignoring us and belittling us is kinda fucked up. Our experiences aren't just a mirror image of trans women's experiences. We face unique problems. We don't just magically disappear into society when we transition." And in response to that, more and more people started saying, "You're silencing trans women. You're taking up the conversational space. Trans women can and should speak for the whole trans community because we've got it worse than anyone else. Trying to say anything about yourself is misogyny."

Not only is it not true, it doesn't make any sense if you stop to think for a second about the ideas of "silencing" people and "taking up too much space." Just think about it. Please. For half a second, stop and think.

Start with the online discourse. Here we are on Tumblr/TikTok/Twitter/wherever. There are literally millions of people using these sites. Anyone can show up and post whatever they want. Trans men posting about our experiences isn't stopping anyone else from posting about their own experiences. Trans men asking people to listen to us isn't an attack on anyone else. People listening to trans men's experiences doesn't mean they are going to forget that trans women exist and have problems too. Asking people to hear what you have to say is not the same thing as telling them to stop listening to someone else. Saying that someone is wrong about something is not saying that they are wrong about everything.

This is as true in-person as it is online. Sure, when we're talking about the local trans social circle, it's true that if we're all sitting in a meeting discussing problems, only one person can talk at a time. But a trans man asking for a turn to talk does not equal saying that no one else is ever allowed to talk. Resources like time and money are limited, yes. But pointing out that a problem is more complicated and multi-faceted than you thought is not an attempt to rob you of anything. If anything, it's going to put you in a better position to identify big problems and work to solve them.

Please. Please just think. Talking about our experiences, spreading knowledge, and striving for liberation are not zero sum games. If you treat them like they are, you end up spending more time jockeying for social dominance than actually trying to help anyone.

[roses4jane]

every girl's personal hell is when her crush likes her best friend instead of her

[rowanofferelden]

With every passing day as a PhD-student, the explanation for why so many Batman villains have a PhD is because of you know, getting the PhD turned them evil (or into an anti-hero), seems more and more legit. I have reached a point where I contemplate my villain identity

[thewriterowl]

Probably one more weekend without an update. Just dealing with the emotional exhaustion and such of the current administration. Have been writing! Just wearing out faster than I'd like to get something finished in time without it feeling too rushed. I'm still here and still writing! The dicks in power is not taking away Luke Skywalker getting railed till next Tuesday from anyone.

[stressghoul]

u ever struggle so bad mentally only a fictional character helps but it just so happens that the fact that they aren’t real makes u collapse like a femme fatale yeah me neither

[nemo-of-house-hamartia]

ok, once more I realize that my own kindness and friendliness has been taken for implied consent, and as always, the troubles that are brewing now are connected to OCs.

So let me be clear and frank one more time, one last time, because I have NO INTENTION of going through what I went through in 2021.

While I am always immensely happy that my Original Characters are enjoyed and that they can serve as source of inspiration, they are NOT however a template for anyone to base their OCs on.

They are not something that you can take in their entirety, change whatever suits you, and then call it your own.

It doesn't work like that, especially because, and allow me to reiterate this once and for all, OCs are *immensely* personal.

They are an extention of the soul of the person that creates them.

So taking whatever suits your fancy and use it for the "aesthetic" or the "vibes" is immensely disrespectful and, dare I say, rather impertinent, especially when both characters happen to belong to the same fandom.

Now, I am not talking about certain tropes and subjects that are typical of certain genre, of course not.

We are all somehow reinveting something that's already there when we work with OCs and stories.

What I am talking about is taking certain specific idiosyncrasies that make a certain character unique, change them to suit your character, and then being SO IMPERTINENT to just call it your own and parading it around without even having the courtesy to quote the person that has inspired you, taking advantage of the fact that I am just a small creator with a small following.

This is a huge No No for me.

Huge.

I appreciate that other creators might have a different opinion or perspective when it comes to OCs, and while I do not share entirely in that, I sure as hell respect it.

But allow me to be crystal clear: if this happens to me, like it had in 2021, that's the *easiest* way to lose all respect I might harbour for you, and I seldomly get mad or angry.

I am always accomodating, always supportive, and I think I have proven it aplenty in the past few years.

But this is something that I cannot condone nor agree with.

And it's not just a matter of ethic, in this sense: it's a matter of also hurting me, and literally put my whole creative process into shamble.

It's a matter of having respect of others.

Now, you might say: who cares if they hurt you? they are characters that do not exist, just move on and have thicker skin!

Well, as I said above, for when it concerns myself, my OCs are an extention of my own soul, a way for me to formulate and explain feelings that sometimes I have a hard time let out; a way for me to actually face, fragmentize and analyze my own trauma through them;

and most important of all, they are OFTEN a love letter to both the world I am exploring with them AND my own husband and child, such as in the case of Jacob and Dorothea,for whom, as I said often in the past 5 years, I have poured A LOT from myself and my husband's own story.

You could say that it probably my fault for having bared my feelings so much and poured so much of myself into a character;

And you might be correct, because I have learned my lesson, and ever since Dorothea and Jacob, no other character has been infused with as much of my own being as they were.

but that doesn't mean that it stings any less when I see it unravels in front of my eyes.

I am tired.

[eat-your-milk]

Hey yall, just wanted to say-please don't criticize AO3 authors without asking first, especially when its something small and easy to ignore.

To quote another comment that I got a while back, saying-

'However, I did notice some grammar and punctuation errors (it wasn't distracting but I'm in honors English so I notice this stuff). There were some sentences you could've combined, misplaced commas, and a missing apostrophe at the beginning.'

-Is just so unhelpful and disheartening to me.

Like I get that you are coming to me with the best intentions, but ASK me first if I even want it. Because, chances are I already know it is a problem and I just haven't had time to fix it.

Now, I don't want this to detract from actual solicited criticism. If you ask beforehand and I say yes? PLEASE tell me what's wrong! I do want to improve with feedback, and as someone with severe ADHD, I have a really hard time catching spelling errors. (and if it actually is a severe problem that makes it unreadable? Go for it!)

But this? It just about destroys my want to write. I was preparing to release a chapter yesterday, but one comment I received yesterday really just blew away all of my drive (even though I know they didn't mean to). I have enough criticism for my own writing (especially for my older stuff). In fact, I severely struggle with even posting anything at all. I battle with deleting my fics every day because I feel like they aren't good enough on a regular basis.

Please remember, I am basically reteaching myself how to write from the ground up right now, and I am sorry that you have to witness that journey. I will improve, and when I reach a stopping point in my fic, I will fix paragraph spacing and minor misspellings.

Just don't come up in my fic and point out every little thing that's wrong without asking first, even if you have the best intentions!

I know its silly and stupid to whine about this but, it really just does get to me, even if its not intended to harm. I write fanfic to write what I want with my favorite characters and to learn more about writing as I go. I am not trying to make a flawless novel to sell. (of course, I will try to make it as flawless as I can, but this is fanfic, not the New York Best Sellers list.)

I don't need to doubt myself anymore than I already do.

[v7-arts]

I have played the demo yesterday and...

[khaire-traveler]

*destroys universe*

It's one of those days.

[lovebeing-a-girl]

is it ok to go back to someone who cheated on you?

[ryukawa29]

[CW: D3ath Threats, Doxxing, Slurs]

Dear redacted fandom,

if you’re so pressed about some harmless headcanon/ship/fanart because you think it ruins your precious fictional boyfriend asmr character and would go as far as shaming people about it.

Then i would suggest you go outside, touch some grass, because i CANNOT believe some guys would go as far as actually send death threats AND doxxing me for shipping rare pairs???? I’m sorry if it hurts your eyes i guess????

Also why in the fuck am i always targetted with these anonymous assholes, all i ever did was draw stuff i am comfortable with and some anons apparently don’t like people having a great time. don’t you guys have anything better to do than be dicks.

I don’t even know if this may actually just the same person who kepts bugging me months ago since they’re anonymous. (I’ve reported those many times but if i’m actually right, they probably made alternatives lol)

Sorry for the long vent, i am just so fucking tired of these toxic tumblr anons.

[naomiknight-17]

I am trying so hard to find the fucks to go to rehab but they elude me

[bell-swamp-fitzjames]

Sorry germs and retroviruses for being personal on main but I really wish healing from shit didn’t take its own sort of toll. Like I can’t change the fact that I’m here where I am now, I am who I am, im in this situation bc of the shit that happened to me & like why isn’t it enough to just exist in society? Even when I’m “doing it right”, it being life, like damn! Feels impossible, severely guy rolling the boulder up the hill bc I can’t spell his name vibes. Anyways life always feels like somehow I ended up on a boat to the fucking arctic without realizing and now they are making me haul the sledge while everyone takes a ride. That stefassson guy duped me like Fred Maurer. If u made it this far, know everything’s fine I’m actually quite happy to alive these days & I have many coping skills and am in therapy. I’m just experiencing severe and continuous burn out that’s making it very hard to function on a basic level