#i am currently NOT breathing
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"I love you."
#pluto the series#pluto series#pluto series ep7#oonmay#oon x may#mayoon#namtanfilm#namtan tipnaree#film rachanun#gmmtv#gl drama#thai gl#i am currently NOT breathing#thanks 4 checking in#馃槶馃槶馃槶#this is getting SO messy like damn#im so obsessed lmao#like they DID THAT#cant believe may ruined it#this couldve been the best sesbian lex scene in history
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Dynamic pose and lighting practice w/ Link
#legend of zelda#loz#breath of the wild#botw#link#pose practice#lighting practice#am currently back in my loz phase lezgo#i love botw and totk so much#and link#sweet precious child
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idk if there's anything you can do about it but someone is using your chappell hot to go art on teepublic & I thought you would want to know if u don't already :(
Nice. love this for me./s
uhhh anyways thank you for bringing this to my attention @hyuckieberry! I鈥檓 gonna try to figure out TeePublic鈥檚 DMCA takedown request. which is very frustrating since i am from the Philippines. and DMCA is very much bound to just the USA.
for now, if anyone sees this, PLEASE HELP ME REPORT the account.
If anyone is interested in buying the tshirt/design, please consider supporting me, its up on my Redbubble. the only place where i have uploaded the design.
Honestly, simply reblogging and liking this or the original post i made will help immensely.
#narwhal speaks#chappell roan#chappell roan fanart#chappell roan fan merch#I thought i was finally having a good day and i was so proud of myself because i finally managed to get out of bed#after having a fucking relapse#and now this????????#it fucking sucks because the more i look into the DMCA takedown request of TeePublic#which btw very labor intensive and full of legal jargon i am ill equipped to follow#ITS LIKE ONLY FOR THE US????????????#I am currently living breathing in the philippines unfortunately#anyways uuuhhh#i鈥檓 gonna go cry and maybe my rage/frustrations can help me figure something out#i鈥檓 gonna be sick#hopefully my rage and frustration will keep me from spiralling back into a depressed state lol.#is this what i get for bedrotting for months?#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#fuck me gently with a fucking chainsaw
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:3 baby will (pony edition)
OHNYH UFCJIJFJDNEOKEFGOGKFHDHDHSJAHSHSFKFKFLD 馃ズ馃ズ馃ス馃ズ馃ズ馃ズ馃ス馃ズ馃挒馃挄馃挀馃ズ馃挆馃ズ馃挄馃挆馃挆馃ズ馃挆
Reallycool when I tell you I burst into tears. Usually I鈥檓 being hyperbolic but NO I TEARED UP SO FAST
EVERYONE. LOOK AT HIM. NOW.
How dare you send this to me. Personally. You fucking sweetheart. Can I kiss you. On the mouth. Right now. Please. Pleasepleaeppslspelspelslepr
#asks my beloved <3#he鈥檚 so cute I can鈥檛 breathe#do you want me to die#I will die#I am currently sniffling IM SO FR#THOSE EYESSHSHSHDJFF#The little hearts too#oh my fucking goooood#I want to hold him in my palms#and CRY#I鈥檓 not even adding an image reaction bc I fear I will reduce the ratio on this image#JHDJHRHRJTJTJFJFJEHEGWGWUWIEIFKDKAKHSJDKF#Will byers#Will byers fanart#hold up adding the main tags just in case
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the thing is this blog and the cuda blog go far and wide in terms on interest but i am at all times one hurtful interview from having a meltdown about mario ferraro...he was so excited to be here...BRENT BURBS WAS HIS MENTOR...slowly everyone he loved or was mentored by got traded...then he had to do it alone while cooch was gone!!! um with mikael granlund and luke kunin. but he was alone!! today ouagh "we owe them better after the last five years" MARIO YOU HAVE ONLY BEEN HERE FIVE YEARS!! DOES IT HURT TO BE THE ONE WHO WAS CHOSEN TO BEAR WITNESS TO THE END OF ONE DYNASTY AND THE HUMBLE BEGINNINGS OF AN NEW AGE!! all these damn ass prospects and young guys talking about how excited they are, how they've never felt this way about the beginning of a season how they're gonna do it for the city the fans they're gonna bring back hockey to san jose.....mario do you feel that same sense of wonder and promise!! mario is there somewhere within you the echo of the young kid who took his best friend to the top of a mountain in marin on a off day during the covid season to say look at the bay area: it's ours......????
#if they don't give him the c after cooch i'm rioting#also if grier trades him. even thinking about that makes me want to throw up#also i briefly thought i was having a panic attack bc my chest felt tight and i was like am i for real abt to throw up over mario ferraro#then realized i tied my dog's baby bjorn too tight to my chest so i can't. breathe#i love him so much 馃槶馃槶馃槶馃槶#mario not my dog#i mean i love my dog too but his elbow is currently jammed into my ribcage and he won't move it even when i try#i wouldn't put mario in a baby bjorn he is too big#''damn ass prospects'' we are heading into season 4 of the william eklund experiment if you count the 9 games he played in 2021#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#hockey for ts#san jose sharks /
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Looks like everybody I know is getting weed for Christmas this year 馃巹
#im currently in weed prison#the trimming has begun someone send help#i am living breathing sleeping weed#cannabis
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so... apparently I've been writing Sammelweis' name wrong the entire time. It's Semmelweis, just like the doctor Ignaz Semmelweis.
I do wonder if she's going to have a heavy-handed reference to the real-life Semmelweis. Look him up, his story and role in the founding of antisepsis practices is incredibly interesting if you're into medical history like me.
#reverse 1999#semmelweis#certified storm moments#she's an npc in the rougelike mode that's introduced in the uh... 1.5 patch I think? or is it 1.6 i can't quite remember#i was curious on what her fullbody looked like and i thankfully found this on danbooru#why is your waist so tiny tho. maam your belt is crushing your organs! let your abdomen breathe jfc#you may not know this about me but i really love looking up medical history and pathology. its a really fascinating topic to me#modern medicine is such a miracle and i am intrigued on how things lead to the medicine and practices we currently have. how did#people back in the day deal with certain diseases and what was the misconceptions and what they got right but didn't quite know#the explanation of#jesus the tags turned into an essay of why i like this
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genuinely admire those who were optimistic for dishonored 3 but in this videogame industry climate and [insert a 4hr video essay about arkane's recent history here], honestly, not getting dh3 is good news
#dishonored#arkane studios#i know its silly to meme when the take is nuanced#and i admit that blade is one hell of an aesthetic. but i'm sitting out of this#somewhat being a hater yes. but that is because i am a lover#i dont think its pointless hater-ing though to be critical of something i wish i could love more#my takeaway from arkane is that its better to be not a fan of a company. a company does not make games#a company's staff does. and those staff need to be treated well and given budget and breathing room to make good things#and i have my doubts about that at the moment. very well documented and supported doubts#if arkane is given AAA budget to make a game. it probs wont be another dh. except maybe a remake bc those are 'safe' bets.#ie. dh1 remastered would sell#judging by doto and even dh2 (which i loved even tho its flawed). i dont think arkane really 'get' why dh1 was magical#so im not sure that a third in the series could necessarily recapture it#especially as theyve confirmed they're closing the drawer on the current overarching plotline#this is the hater corner celebration! i am pouring you a drink! [pres why does this look like blood?] we like themes n motifs here!#pres rants in tags#anyway mutuals lets make a fan edition of dh3 for shits n gigs
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I am afraid.
For myself as a woman and queer person.
For my clients who are elderly and/or disabled and rely on programs like Medicaid and Social Security.
For my colleagues (and myself) as employees of a nonprofit, especially with Jewish in the name.
For my POC friends. My queer friends and family. My disabled friends and family.
For my friends and family who are teachers and crisis counselors and medical professionals, whose careers and possibly lives will be threatened even more by pro-lifers and conspiracy theorists.
For my friends that are specks of Blue in places that we slowly and with horror watched turn Red.
For this country. For the direction things are going to go. For the light at the end of the tunnel turning out to be the tikitorches of a MAGAt rally.
But I am also here. I love you. I support you. I want to help you however I can.
And I am not going down without a fight.
#personal#post election 2024#U.S. politics#current events#remember to breathe and to grieve and then to get back up and fight back#I am genuinely scared. I can't pretend I'm not like I did in 2016#but I'm not without hope yet#(and remember if you're like me and doing okish to still practice self care today. and to check on people in your life who might not be)#(also you know how they challenged 2020? wr can do that too. and in some states have actual evidence to back that unlike them)
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So @uhhhitsme sent me an ask about pet names, and the curtwen demons would not let me sleep last night until I had written something for both the canon universe and for my botw/totk curtwen au that I haven't properly posted about yet on tumblr.
Under the cut are some ideas that I originally included in my response to that ask, but have now decided to separate out into another post.
For context, in the botw/totk au I cast Curt as Link and Owen as Zelda - so for anyone reading this who isn't a Zelda fan, Owen is a prince expected to unlock a sacred power and save the world, while Curt is his appointed knight, who is also the hero chosen by the Sword that Seals the Darkness.
Rough simplified progression of their dynamic pre-Calamity is "I hate his guts why am I stuck dealing with this guy" -> banter becomes less hostile -> building want for honesty, yearning and concern -> fa莽ade breakdown -> actually confiding in each other -> "I've never admitted this to anyone before" -> lovers.
With both of them, there are names that they start off using for each other mockingly/as a formality, that eventually become imbued with new meaning as their relationship changes.
Owen probably calls Curt something like "Sir Knight", either as mockery or deliberately distancing over-formality, towards the beginning. "Sir Mega" takes on a similar tone. Over time, he starts to actually use Curt's name - still sharply at first, but eventually much softer. When he uses "sir knight" again, either to keep up a formal appearance or more as an inside joke, it's with much more respect. Their history together (and the understanding of how much his role as a knight, as a chosen hero, has affected Curt) seeps into the phrase.
When Curt is assigned as the prince's appointed knight, it's hard not to let his frustration with his role intrude on how he says the various stuffy formalities with which he is expected to address Owen. "Your highness", "your majesty", "your grace", "your radiance", blah blah blah, there's a different one for every event and it is tedious. Over time, with repetition, they start to sound more ordinary, though. After a while, fed up, Owen demands Curt call him "Prince Owen" instead - it's far more practical. Over time, Curt manages to make this phrase sound incredibly casual. When they finally become lovers, some of those old formalities return, sounding very different - "highness", "majesty", "radiance". The respect packed into them isn't the same as that which is expected to be afforded to a sovereign - it's something beyond that, a different kind of devotion.
Ultimately, though, their names are really the most intimate form of address here. No ornamentation, no honorifics, just each other. It's particularly significant the first time Curt calls Owen by just his first name - he doesn't have to be royal, or powerful, or holy, just a person. Just himself. And that's enough.
#you opened the box#hope you don't mind the tag mars feel free to ignore this one#i don't have a proper name for the whole of the botw/totk curtwen au yet#current temporary title for the totk bit though is#legends are forever: tears of the dragon#not sure what to name the breath of the wild bit though#tags from the original version of this post pertaining to the au:#also about the au you may well be thinking: but blotts! you generally don't like owen being aristocracy but here you've made him a prince!#this is true! however i am a traitor because owen being zelda is just more important to me.#is it stupid to use this ask game as the first place i publically talk about the totk au? probably!#it will be a while before i post about it properly since i'm telling the story in dms and want to avoid spoilers. hi lycan if you see this!#however the pet names thing is something i had been thinking about for a bit
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....why are the youtube comments so mad lol don't y'all like to have fun. don't we like to have fun here
#ari speaks#half of them are 'wahhh this is what happens when you make games WOKE' like. baby. shhhh. it's not dark fantasy enough for you???#like we are allowed to have varied opinions but also idk. dragon age has always had moments of being a lil silly. especially inquisition.#titsicles???? the nug king???? i'm attacking your holdfast with a goat????? cmon now.#we DO get a little silly here and i'm really not opposed to (well-placed) tonal irreverence in a world about to end.#bitch the world we are CURRENTLY living in is falling apart and i am also being a silly fucking guy because it's all i got.#if i lived in thedas irl i'd be in taverns getting tomatoes thrown at me for bad stand-up about kirkwall HAVE SOME FUN LIVE A LITTLE.#also bc it's been so long one has to imagine that they're also trying to grab some new fans here so it does not surprise me#that the trailer is not 'Boo Hoo Sad Times Dark Fantasy Game No. 49' (i say as an enjoyer of depressing dark fantasy)#esp when all of the prior promotional material has been very doom and gloom.#i don't think that just because the game is being marketed like this/that we're switching focus from solas that the game will be#sanitized and not dealing with any kind of fucked up lore and shit. i am holding out hope that we're going to get some cool opportunities#to play in a space that is def dark but can still give room to breathe.#anyway i do not actually giv a fuck (genuine not insulting) if the trailer did not make u excited das ok.#unless you're complaining that it's woke garbage now/so bad because g*ider is uninvolved. if thats the case you may fuck off.#sorry for the tag essay!
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Yoga clan
#i threw this together at roughly 5 am after not sleeping all night#it is currently 8:26 and i am proud of my work but i feel so insane#ill fully render it. eventually#probably#yiga clan#yiga#loz#legend of zelda#zelda#botw#breath of the wild#loz botw#botw yiga#age of calamity#aoc#aoc yiga#tears of the kingdom#totk#loz aoc#loz totk#tjats prob all the tags?#idk im so tired#i have a wip of Yoga Kohga sitting in my notebook.#will update on that soon#i fully believe they have yoga every tuesday and thursday#everyone puts their sweatpants on and talks shit abt Link#gotta be limber if ur gonna take down the hero of hyrule!#my art#my work#original work
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Letti, usually: noooo don't put your face near my face noooo i hate it
Letti for an hour this morning: i'm going to sleep with my nose in your eye socket and you're going to like it
#cats am i rite fellas#i did. i did enjoy it it was very sweet#tho i did turn my face so that her Very Cold Tiny Nose was pressed into my cheekbone instead#i woke up to a cat on my chest and she like#spent a minute gauging which side of my face to lay on#so of course she crammed herself between me and the squishmallow#IT WAS VERY CUTE I WAS VERY HAPPY#and she's half the size of your average cat so i could Breathe! she's not that heavy!#absolutely unprompted#sorry i had to share this Experience <3#she is currently loafed between me and my laptop as i type this#she's been getting even more affectionate#i am not opposed! she's very patient about it!#and i do not mind having a lil kitten on my chest while i sleep! its Soothing <3
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i do not know how to explain to people that "transmisogyny" is the specific transphobia that trans women + transfems face (often but not exclusively at the hands of cis people), and "transandrophobia" is the specific transphobia that trans men + mascs face (often but not exclusively at the hands of cis people), and that they all come together under the umbrella of "transphobia." these are not opposing concepts nor are they mutually exclusive, to believe in one does not mean non-belief in the other. is there a simpler way of phrasing this. can i be clearer.
#i can't handle that post that's going around accusing everyone who acknowledges the existence of transadrophobia of being a transmisogynist#i want to scream i want to peel my skin off thats not how this works that's not how any of this works#in fact one might imagine that understanding the nuances of all different types of transphobia might make you a better ally to trans women!#what a shock!#to understand that bioessentialism can harm trans women and trans men and nonbinary people and and and#im so tired. the hate campaigns are horrifying and the blatant and aggressive removal of trans women + transfems blogs is AWFUL and specifi#this falls under transmisogyny! we can acknowledge and understand that#right? right!#but that in no way just makes it trans men + mascs fault?? they are NOT the (only - there are cruel people in every demographic) people#who are mass reporting innocent transfem's blogs#it's TERFs and transmisogynists#if we have the nuance to understand that not every transmisogynist is a TERF then we can understand that not everyone who#acknowledges that transandrophobia is real is. a transmisogynist?! hello?? am i alive right now. am i currently living and breathing??#genuinely reading that post doesn't feel real. that is so far from reality i'm nauseated.#txtly#i genuinely don't know how this can be made any clearer.#i'm tired. idk
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any ideas currently swirling around in your head?
(HIII RED HRU)
Dear God, you have no idea.
#current one i am literally daydreaming about midshift revolves around 2hwang twins in a jyp main dancers dance crew with a cruel instructir#where hyunjin gets short of breath and it looks like asthma but HA NO PSYCH its bad bad pneumonia and he gets hospitalized#and its basically about how they revert to their childhood clingy selves and how hyunjin process emotions loudly but yeji does so internally#and very vivid scene of yeji relieving her parents one night when hyunjin isnt doing well telling them to go home and prep for the day and#hyunjin is way hooked up and not reaching and responding and she crawls into the bed with him and doesnt sleep listening to all the beeping#and then HYUNJIN DIES. and its when Yeji is in class and shes not picking up her mums calls bc she /knows/ so Ryujin goes to grab it and#convinces her to pickup and she does and basically collapses and minho goes to tell the instructor off while they deal with a basically#catatonic yeji who is kinda quietly screaming and limp and they all try to talk to her but shes just numb and--#anyway. you want another one? :D
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back on my bullshit: looking through and making edits to my doc full of Issues I Have That Haven't Ever Been Looked Into for the doctor. which may prove to be futile but i will not think to bring any of this up + will absolutely try and downplay it if i do not do this.
i still keep joking that i will hand them the papers and go "pick one and we can start there" as well as threatening to walk out if they so much as breathe the word "asthma" to me. hopefully i can actually do these things at the appointment.
and i know. i know that doctors hate it when you present possible diagnoses and that you should let them do it themselves but like. you don't understand. i have had 22 years of not having anything done when i had a health concern, to the point where i stopped even realizing that things were concerning until someone else pointed out to me that it may be a problem.
so im coming armed and prepared and if the doctor refuses to work with me like im an actual person, then i will leave and i will ask for a different doctor. rinse and repeat until i find someone who will actually help me.
#ik this is probably not the best way to do this i do i get that#but for my own sanity and the sake of actually getting things down as they ARE not as i fake#bc i am too anxious about seeming needy or useless or desperate for attention or whatever#then yeah. the doctor is getting my 8 page document of issues i have noticed i have#that have never actually been looked into by a medical professional bc military hospitals fucking suck ass#and i didn't have a choice before#(and then when i did i had too much anxiety to actually DO anything about it until now)#ough.#wish me luck for this appointment guys.#it's not for another 2 weeks or so but still#it's also a new patient appointment which. i assume means looking at current state and family history#more than any of this#but im bringing the doc anyway so they have an idea of whats going on#and again so they can choose a starting point.#breathing issues/gi issues/headaches/tinnitus/allergies#or any of the various mental health issues tho i figure those will be outsourced to someone else#since this is just general medicine lmao#but anyway. pick one and when we get somewhere with that we can do smth else#or if we get nowhere with that. whichever.#shh ac
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