#i already had thoughts abt them but the whole. the don’t go where i can’t follow trope. omfgggg

[pinkfey]

“if i turn from doing what’s right, i’ll lose myself” / “then i’m coming with you” / “i know :)”

[crossbackpoke-check]

"This extra space next to me belongs to you. I know where I end now. I won't get lost." -- shoot me (metaphorically) and leave me for dead (metaphorically) why won't you. To make this about Dylan and maybe it's about Connor, maybe it's about Brinksy, maybe it's about any journeyman in the NHL. My brain screamed Chris Driedger and his memorable (to me) Players' Tribune article:

And how can you mention Dylan and Zach (Za-ach, the way Dylan says it) without me having a breakdown about them? You simply can't. And for the younger dudes, maybe it's a little Bords/Briss, not yet steady in The Show, a little bit of distance, a summer that tries to erase and make up all the memories they've made separately... and then a blurry insta story in Vegas. Just like old times but somewhere else. Maybe it's not the same bed, maybe it's not the same set of forks, but maybe it's the principle of the thing.

Anyway, goodbye. Sorry for this, your tag walls make me break out in imagined scenarios.

Much love. xxx

please never be sorry for sending me messages <3 i love reading them i love getting them i think they’re beautiful and i love them i’m!!!!! [🥹💕🦋🫧✨💘😭 <- the best approximation of what my heart is doing]

ok NOW i am taking this step by step because every narrative here kicked me straight in the knees (metaphorically) i am w e e p i n g (literally): i knew tangentially about chris driedger going to seattle but i had never read his players’ tribune love letter to seattle & all i can say is oh. oh. and with the part about trains delayed but still being right on time—

sometimes a dream is a truth your heart knows long before you do. the space that the city and the team made for him (“you’d be the only guy on the team”)🗣️🗣️🗣️ !!! but the way that chris talks about needing to put in the work & leo not letting him quit,,, that’s chris filling up the teakettle with twice as much water, crowding one side of the bed (falling asleep against a bus window dreaming), becoming unburdened by the idea of not being their guy, not having the fallback being their draft pick to content and settle himself with. that’s chris betting on a future. that’s the train coming down the tracks, right on time.

(i am feeling unhinged about it)

SECOND. i know i was the one that said zach and dylan to start so technically i brought this on myself but also i have been ktfo by the mere mention of the way that dylan says zach’s name different from everyone else, stealing an extra breath, stealing as much time as he can get with him, which reminded me of a poem i just read:

The Need Is So Great, Jim Moore

^^^dylan still in love with zach even as he’s leaving, can feel himself losing him, and taking every sliver of the love in his smile that he can get. even if he knows zach doesn’t still feel the same way he’s drawing out the long goodbye & saying i love you in a thousand ways without ever saying it out loud (“i have been asking for a time but in ways that have no words” because he doesn’t want to ask too much, to ask for love) in the hope that zach will say it back OKAY I’M LEAVING i can’t do this

that was a lie because THREE. “maybe it’s the principle of the thing” please insert the most ungodly screech how could you just (lovingly) come in straight with the steel chair and bean me upside the head with that l i n e i think this story has the potential for such tragedy in it but also the most tender domestic longing because bords & briss have known each other for a long time (i think) and guys do sometimes lose themselves when they first get to the nhl.

it’s a big scene, you’re with big name guys, you’re finally doing the thing you always dreamed about, you’re no longer necessarily the best because everyone’s the best, you’re not sure how you fit in, you can get lost in the glitz and the glamor of it but you can also literally get lost in it, the slog of the season and getting caught up and down between teams and leagues and endless airports and buses and travel and ice rinks, losing your phone (accidental) and having new people hound you for quotes and fame and connection so you lose your phone (on purpose) and i think where i’m trying to go is: this could play out as the tragedy of borde going to the california coastline and briss shipping off to the vegas strip and both of them getting a little lost.

maybe there’s someone else, maybe i am steadfastly not thinking about “a summer that tries to erase and make up all the memories they've made separately” as either a summer of them pretending things are ok after a year of barely speaking and now being completely different people they never were before OR a summer of them trying to pretend like they can forget about each other because maybe they didn’t think their relationship was the same thing, is all, when they were or weren’t together. maybe it’s nobody’s fault but for the fact that they were scared and tired and lonely trying to make it in the big times and didn’t know how to show it. and then borde shows up with takeout and plastic forks in vegas and it’s december and nothing like winter in ann arbor and still they fill up all the empty spaces in each other with the things they didn’t know they’d miss until they were gone and this is the real thing, not whatever they were trying too hard to be, to recreate their own nostalgia for the love in their memories. it’s the principle of the thing, is all, to always be true to the love they have right now & not what they think it should be.

sorry that i wrote you kind of an essay of an answer but i had so so so many thoughts because your ask was so lovely so thank you for sending it to me (you are always welcome to!! i love your imagined scenarios!!! cannot even explain how much!!!) & thank you for taking the time to read my walls of tags :))) <3

[norrizzandpia]

The Softest Launch (LN4)

Summary: He tried to be secret, but the eyes never lie.

Warnings: NOTHINGGGG language tho

Note: it was lance’s launch that sent me into this spiral

landonorris it was a good race ❤️

Comments:

mclarenfan22 YO WHO TF IS HE LOOKIN AT

- oscarandlando4ever carlos?

- mclarenfan22 idk abt that one girl

Lando-my-love i refuse to believe he has a girlfriend

- ln4andop81 the red heart is saying something else

oscarpiastri congrats on the podium man!

- mclarennnn what do you know.

- mclarensgirl oscar. spill it.

——

landonorris fun day on the karting track! 🏎️

Comments:

ln4andop81 MAX IS IN ITALY WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND AND OSCAR IS OFF DOING PR IN LONDON WHO TF IS THIS.

- oscarandlando4ever we cant even fall back on carlos bc he is with charles at ferrari hq in italy as well

- Lando-my-love guys… i fear this is a soft launch

- mclarenfan22 DONT SAY THAT.

oscarpiastri tell her i said hi!

- mclarensgirlll HER????? PASTRY TELL US WHATS GOING ON

- landonorris will do!!

- mclarennn if this is his soft launch, i. will. cry.

——

lando.jpg she’s learning 💋

Comments:

mclarennn WHO?????

ln4andop81 I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE

danielricciardo i still can’t believe you let her handle your camera

- landonorris ive given her other things that are delicate too

- danielricciardo shes made you a ball of mush

- landonorris a ball of love

- mclarensgirlll i have never been speechless before until rn

- mclarenfan22 GIVEN HER OTHER THINGS THAT ARE DELICATE TOO???? AS IN HIS HEART???? IM SLEEPING ON THE HIGHWAY ALREADY AND HE HASNT EVEN OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED IT YET 😭😭😭

oscarandlando4ever hes soft launching her so well and so gently i cant im crying you can tell this one is different i think hes in love guys

Liked by landonorris

——

maxverstappen 📸 creds -> lando’s “friend”

Comments:

landonorris i said say friend not “friend” ‼️

- mclarensgirlll BYE MAX IS TRYING TO HELP US OUT

- maxverstappen i think the soft launch is over mate

- ln4andop81 PLZ LET IT BE OMFG MY BRAIN CANT HANDLE IT ANYMORE

kellypicquet and lando said she was bad at taking pics 💀

- ynnnn idek where he got that from i literally have taken his insta pics for years

- Lando-my-love WHO IS ynnnn IS THAT HER???

- mclarenfan22 her account is priv but I THINK IT IS ALSO YEARS???? SHES BEEN TAKING HIS PICS FOR YEARS????

- oscarandlando4ever BRUH IF WE MISSED THIS RELATIONSHIP THIS WHOLE TIME IM THROWING MYSELF IN A WALL

——

landonorris I’m going to try and keep this as brief as possible because Y/n is incredibly special to me and I would like to keep the best parts of her to myself, but, yes, I do have a girlfriend. As you can probably gather, her name is Y/n and she’s been my lifeline for the past 5 years. I know this picture doesn’t really do justice to how she looks or how we are as a couple, but I’ve found that I would like to keep it that way. She’s someone I hold very close to my heart and keeping the quiet, intimate moments just for us is a high priority for me. All I ask from all of you is that you treat her with the kindness she deserves and don’t bombard her on social media. I’ve kept her away from the spotlight for a long time and have only made her presence known because keeping her a secret seemed worse than letting the F1 world into that part of my life. I’m glad you’ve gotten to meet my love. I plan on spending the rest of my life with her. Xx

Comments have been disabled on this post.

——

TWITTER

mclarensgirlll YALL SEEN THE INTERVIEW WITH LANDO????????? BRO IM CRYING HES SO CUTE

- ln4andop81 reporter: “were you nervous to let everyone know about her?” Lando: “well, the drivers, my friends, and family all knew i had met someone because apparently, according to them, i had a different look in my eyes. So, announcing it to them wasnt that nerve racking because they already knew, but, to the public, yeah, I was nervous. More nervous than she was.” Reporter: “so she was nervous?” Lando: “only because she thought no one was going to like her which is and was absurd. She’s the greatest human being I’ve ever met. There’s genuinely no scenario I could think of that someone would end up even slightly disliking her.” BRO.

- Lando-my-love AND THE WAY HE TALKED ABT FIRST SEEING HER 😫😫 “it was like my eyes were glued to her. I guess i was just so in shock someone could be that beautiful and, sometimes, i still am.”

- mclarenfan22 DONT GET ME STARTED ON HIS PROTECTION OF HER BYE “well, she’s just so perfect to me. The world I live in can be ruthless and unfair and messy, all the things she isn’t. I love her that way. I love her for that. She’s my quiet place I can go to when my job and lifestyle get to be too much. She’s like a time out and we both agreed we want to keep it that way.”

- oscarandlando4ever PLZ THE WAY OSCAR EXPOSED HIM TOO “when she’s around, Lando is so much more tolerable. She can calm him in a way I have never seen before. In fact, the engineers and I all agreed around a year ago that she needed to start coming to races because he was always a hot head if it didn’t go well. When we found a way to sneak her in and she did start attending events, he actually started to breathe if things didn’t go his way.”

- mclarensgirlll AND THEN THE WAY LANDO ENDED THE INTERVIEW WITH “But anyways, i could talk about her for hours, something i told myself i wouldn’t do. I’m in love with her and I just hope people understand we want to be left alone for a while. Just until we get married.” CRYING BC I THINK HES RLLY OFF THE MARKET THIS TIME

- oscarpiastri i know all of you want me to “spill” but really all i can tell you is that, yes, norizz officially rizzed his perfect girl and, yes, he is really off the market this time.

[tvgals]

Hey I don’t know if your taking requests at the moment but I was thinking about a somewhat emotional piece . I was thinking about connie x bestfriend y/n reunion where they haven’t seen each other since 10th grade. Like y/n was on her way to a family event that was hosted at her parents house and like everyone knew the whole surprise thing he wanted to do so she walks in seeing everyone recording so she look confused and then he walks up behind her holding flowers and a teddy bear. ( I’m so sorry this is long but no pressure )

IM GOING BACK TO 505!

you and connie haven’t seen each other in over four years, imagine your face of surprise when he comes to see you.

𓈒 ﹒ ☆ 𓂂 ˚ ☆ ꙳ * ࣭ ࣭

you’d never felt the same as you did during tenth grade. you had a loyal bestfriend and a huge crush you still haven’t managed to get over. you sit up in your bed and rub your eyes, picking up your phone. you tap the screen to see new messages from your sister.

‘don’t forget abt that reunion td!!!’

‘momma says wear pink!’

you grin and take off your bonnet, letting your hair rest on the middle of your back. you get out of the bed and stretch, walking to the bathroom.

your train of thoughts ran about this morning, it seems as if you can’t get connie off of your mind these days. you already couldn’t let go of him, but it’s more than usual this month. you missed him an indescribable amount, wishing he’d text or call you. you’ve been thinking he’s more than likely forgotten about you, that he’s moved on and is living life freely. it hurt your heart to think about things like this, that he doesn’t care about you, but it was infact the opposite.

connie’s pov :

connie had a dopey grin on his face. a week or so ago, he’d gotten a dm from your sister on instagram, asking if he wanted to come and see you for the weekend. connie thought it was some joke, that he was being pranked, but once he saw all of the post’s including your beautiful face, he practically started kicking his feet. he texted back with an enthusiastic response, a smile on his face.

connie threw on a pair of dunks, a pair he bought a while ago because they reminded him of you, and headed out the door. he slid into his all black hellcat and made his way to your family home. your sister texted a few times, an even bigger smile making its way onto his face.

‘y/n is on her way now!!’

‘make sure you hide real good’

connie pulls up to your house and parks across the street. he looks over to his passenger seat and sighs before picking up the roses and chocolates, a teddy bear holding $200 in 20’s in front. he picks them up and gets out the car, walking to the side of your house where he’s sure he won’t be seen. five minutes or so went by before he saw your pink porsche pull into the driveway, you getting out dressed in a beautiful pink strapless two piece. connie smiles to himself.

you walk up the stairs to your house and when you open the door connie can hear the mumbles and laughs of your family members.

your pov:

you walk into the house to see everyone with their phones out, smiling and giggling.

“what are y’all recording for?” you giggle nervously. your sister comes up to you and tells you to close your eyes and turn around. you scrunch your face up in confusion but comply, turning around and squeezing g your eyes shut. connie got a text of ‘CMON!!’ from your sister and he walks up the stoop to your house, opening the door with a grin. “open your eyes!” you sister yells, laughing. you open your eyes to see connie holding all those thoughtful gifts for you.

“connie?” you laugh, a shocked look on your face. “hey, y/n.” he responds smiling. you throw yourself into a hug with connie. tears starting to roll down your face. “don’t cry, pretty girl.” connie says, hugging you back. you pull back from him and wipe your tears, looking at his hands. “is that for me?” you ask, looking back up at him. “of course.” he says, handing you your gifts.

“i thought you forgot about me..” you admit, looking at him. “of course not. i’ve been thinking about you for the past 4 years, pretty.” connie replies, hugging you once more.

“i missed you so much, connie.”

“i missed you more, y/n.”

i hope you enjoyed this… i’ll probably redo it but i felt the need to get it out.

[twoa-plus]

part 2 of turning everyone in gravity falls into creatures !! also my specific monsterfalls lore involves human versions of The Horrors so some of those will be in here also

(part 1)

i’m pretty sure unicorns already have some kind of association with nobility or the upper class or whatever and the in-universe unicorns are. Like That. so i think it fits :)

someone on tiktok said she’d be a cyclops and i agree :3 a lot of older depictions of cyclopes seem to still have like empty sockets where the eyes would normally be which i thought was neat so i kept that, felt like she needed smth extra too so i gave her little sheep ears & a tail :3 something something odyssey reference

LISTEN HEAR ME OUT OK i don’t. like a lot of more stereotypical “demon” depictions of bill. like i think it would be neater if he had a design where u could imagine him doing his whole “i’m a muse :D” thing and actually be believable yknow. also he’s short this guy totally has tiny man rage u can’t convince me otherwise

orthrus-like thing for blubs & durland :) blubs is a shih tzu for the mustache and durland is a borzoi bc he long. also for anyone concerned this au is post-canon & all of these people were born human they are not related lmao

baku fiddleford. LISTEN OK there’s like this whole thing of “oh yeah baku will eat ur nightmares but if they’re still hungry they’ll eat ur hopes and dreams too and leave u an empty shell of the person u once were” and i read that and i thought abt him and it made me sad so now all of u have to be sad too

toby determined is a squonk. i don’t even have to explain this one

tad strange is a normal human.

(personally i think of him as some kind of lovecraftian horror in human form but he can be whatever u want lol)

cockatrice tambry ?? i had no clue what to do with her other than that she kind of has bird vibes to me, and the cockatrice has enough edgy teenager energy that i think it works

mrs gleeful is an asrai bc they have anxiety and also it’s an excuse to give her a pool vacuum

human axolotl !! i really like the sort of pastel space thing they have going on in canon, hopefully this fits them :)

that is all for now !!! if i remember i’ll link part 3 here when i have it :D

edit: at long last

[starlightkun]

➠ word count: 13.5k ➠ warnings: scenes of a child crying if you don’t want to read that (nightmares and stuff), also people are called mommy/daddy in this so if you can’t be normal abt that please skip this one ➠ genre: fluff, angst? but like around them in terms of life not within their relationship, established relationship, parents sungchan/reader, former hockey captain sungchan, chronically ill reader (chronic migraines), part of the buzzer beater series (after freezing the puck, or if you’ve only read buzzer beater & 27jsc, this should still make sense!) ➠ extra info: the reader in this has chronic migraines, which i have. when the reader’s migraines, experiences as a chronically ill person, and thoughts about being chronically ill are described, that is me writing directly from my own life. i am not generalizing the lives of all people with chronic migraines/chronic illnesses, but i am sending all my love to any readers out there living with a chronic illness, and here’s a reminder to go take your meds! ➠ author’s note: i can’t believe we’re finally done omg. i miss them so much already 🤧 thank you so much to everybody who has followed along with this series! i wasn’t expecting this to be a whole series, nor for so many people to like this fic that i started when i was feeling super frustrated with my migraines. it was definitely something that was super personal and specific to me that i was blown away by how many of y’all liked it and told me you related. so thank you, again!! ➠ series masterlist

“Really? You’re reading Breton lais to our child?” Sungchan’s teasing whisper was barely audible. “He’s going to start school saying stuff like nary and furthermore.”

“Says the man who knew I was reading a Breton lai,” you shot back just as quietly.

“Binnie, are you ready to go see Daddy?” You asked your son excitedly as you unbuckled his seatbelt, helping him out of the backseat and onto the parking lot pavement.

“Yeah!” He yelled out, the small sound echoing impressively in the open area. The five-year-old ran ecstatic circles around you as you walked calmly towards the university’s ice rink. “Mommy, am I skating with Daddy today?”

“I don’t know, you’ll have to ask him nicely after he’s done working,” you informed Woobin as he skidded to a half-skip half-walk next to you, grabbing your gloved hand with his.

Walking into the hockey rink that you knew like the back of your own hand at this point, you saw the Raptors still practicing, and guided your son into the bleachers so you two could watch. Woobin climbed up on the seat next to you, standing on it so he could actually see, and you offered a hand for him to keep himself balanced. He used it until he felt stable, then pushed it away insistently. A few of the players waved at you two, and you both waved back, your son as enthusiastic as ever when he got noticed, waving practically with his entire little body.

Sungchan was on the ice, directing two players with his back to you, and as he skated backward away from them for them to line up and continue practicing, he happened to glance over his shoulder and in your direction. You raised a casual hand in greeting, and he waved back. Woobin sent him a zealous, flying kiss with his whole arm, and Sungchan visibly laughed and immediately went to do it back. After the two players that he’d been instructing had presumably corrected the issue, your husband gave them both pats on the shoulder before skating over your way.

Woobin screamed out a “Hi Daddy!” so loud you were sure the entire campus could hear him, and every head on the ice turned around to look. You burst into laughter, rubbing his back fondly at his enthusiasm, and Sungchan covered his face as he chortled as well.

A few minutes later and Coach called practice, the players slowly starting to filter off the ice and into the locker room. You guided Woobin down through the bleachers towards the gate, where Sungchan was waiting for the two of you.

Your husband had already opened the gate to the ice, standing on the flooring just off it, where you and your son were walking. Woobin flung himself at his legs at full-speed, and Sungchan easily picked him up, beaming as he kissed his forehead.

“Hey, buddy!” Sungchan grinned, readjusting your son’s beanie.

“Hi, Daddy!” He chirped back, bouncing in his arms.

“Hi, hon,” he kissed your cheek, and you gave his a quick peck in greeting as well.

“Hey, Channie.” You slipped your arm around his back in a one-armed hug. “Little dude wants to ask you something.”

“Oh really?” Sungchan focused his inquisitive eyebrow raise at your son.

“Can I skate with you? Please? Pretty please? Pretty pretty please?” Woobin immediately put on his best pout and puppy dog eyes, a display that always made you wonder how he wasn’t genetically Sungchan’s. The two of you had agreed some time ago that with your chronic migraines having a genetic component, you didn’t want to risk passing it down, and had looked into fostering initially. Woobin was your first placement at just a few days old, and he never left, the adoption going through right before his second birthday.

“Mr. Coach ended practice early, so we do have a few minutes,” your husband qualified his acquiescence.

“Yay!”

“You joining us, hon?”

“Sure.”

After fetching yours and your son’s skates from his office, Sungchan helped Woobin put his on, then double checked yours as always. Having married a former collegiate hockey player turned collegiate hockey coach, you’d gotten proficient enough at lacing up your own skates, but he wanted be sure every time that you weren’t going to twist your ankle, or have them come untied, or something else unfortunate.

Coach was still on the ice with the current goalie and center on one end, so you and your family kept to the other side. Woobin squealed and yipped with delight as Sungchan half-carried and half-pulled him around on the ice, you trailing behind with a fond smile on your lips as you watched on.

“Mr. Coach!” Woobin suddenly called to the other end of the rink.

“Oh, Binnie, Mr. Coach is working right now,” Sungchan tried to divert him. “We should leave him alone for now, buddy.”

“What was that, champ?” Coach’s gruff voice responded, the older man starting in your direction.

Woobin was absolutely thrilled to have his attention now, trying to pull Sungchan that way. “Mr. Coach! Mr. Coach!”

“I’m right here, kiddo,” he smoothly stopped right in front of your son. “I’m old but I’m not deaf yet. What do you want to tell me?”

“Mommy signed me up for my own hockey team today!” Woobin told him proudly. “Are you gonna be my coach too?”

“I don’t coach every hockey team in the world, you know.”

Woobin looked down at his skates dejectedly, as if he hadn’t considered this possibility before now.

“But… I did let your dad talk me into being his assistant coach for a certain little league team this season. Was that yours?” Coach asked teasingly, making the boy let out a loud gasp of realization.

“Was it, Daddy? Was it?” He looked up at your husband with wide eyes.

“Maybe…” Sungchan replied with a sly grin.

Woobin rounded on you, buzzing with excitement. “Did you hear that, Mommy? Mr. Coach is gonna be my coach!”

“I heard, buddy. Just like he was your Daddy’s coach,” you chuckled. Looking up at the older man, you added, “How does that make you feel, Coach? Teaching multiple generations?”

“Like my back is going to give out any day now,” he groaned and grabbed his lumbar. “Don’t remind me, Y/N, please.”

You laughed, making a motion of zipping up your lips and throwing away the key.

“Anyway, let me finish up with these two,” he gestured to the two Raptors still milling about on the other end of the ice. “Are you locking up, Jung?”

“Not today, got some errands to run before buddy’s naptime,” Sungchan explained.

“I’m five, I don’t need a nap anymore!” Woobin insisted.

“Hey, champ, look at me,” Coach requested, and waited until he had his attention before continuing. “How old do you think I am?”

“I don’t know, like a hundred?”

You couldn’t help but burst into laughter, grabbing Sungchan’s arm for support as he at least had the decency to cover his mouth to hide his chuckles.

Coach nodded, not breaking eye contact with your son. “Exactly. I’m like a hundred, and I still take naps.”

“Really?”

“Really. You need them to make sure your brain—” he poked the boy’s forehead “—and your body—” he poked his belly, making him giggle “—are at their best. Especially a growing kid like you.”

“So why do you need them? If you’re not a kid anymore?”

“I’m saying you need them extra because you’re a kid. Grown-ups need them sometimes too.”

He pouted thoughtfully for a moment, then pointed up at you. “Mommy takes naps when she has a migraine. That’s when her head hurts really, really bad.”

“There you go. Told you they weren’t just for kids.” Coach stood up straight, cracking his back with a satisfied groan. “I’ll see you all later, okay?”

“Bye, Mr. Coach!” Woobin waved enthusiastically.

“See you Monday, Coach,” Sungchan nodded to him.

You mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him, and he shot you a wink over his shoulder before skating back over to his players, his voice immediately souring as he started barking out orders again.

With the excitement of his upcoming little league team on his mind, your son insisted on having Sungchan show him moves and maneuvers today. You were of course the default practice dummy both for Sungchan to demonstrate, and your son to practice. Which only worked so well since none of you had sticks or a puck or gear of any kind except for your skates, but Woobin was having fun, so you were happy.

Coach eventually finished with the guys at the other end, and as you saw him start off the ice first, you called out to him, “Done for the day, Coach?”

He turned back to you. “I wish! Got some paperwork to finish up in the office! If somebody’s bleeding—call 911, not me!”

You laughed, giving him a final wave as he headed off. About to turn to your family to suggest that you leave to do your errands as well, you spotted the two Raptors players still loitering by the goal, no longer practicing, and yet still not rushing to leave.

“You boys need something?” You asked them knowingly.

“Well, if it’s alright with you, Professor…” the goalie, who had been in your Intro to Literary Theory and Criticism class last spring, began.

“We were wondering if we could see if we could skate with the MVP too?” The center finished hopefully.

“Just for a little! We heard you telling Coach you guys had errands to run before his naptime!” His friend rushed to add.

Woobin’s focus had already started waning on his impromptu lesson from his dad, and as you looked over, you could see Sungchan beginning to wind down on his instructing as he realized this. You checked the time on your phone, then looked back to the two college boys. “Sure, you can ask Binnie if he wants to skate.”

They erupted into celebratory hoots, chest-bumping before practically tossing aside their unnecessary equipment. Suddenly realizing themselves, they collected themselves and turned to you, bowing their heads politely. “Thank you, Professor.”

“You’re welcome, boys,” you replied with humor in your voice, watching as they took off, seemingly racing each other to Sungchan and Woobin.

You could hear bits of their conversation from where you were leaning against the wall halfway down the rink, and watched fondly as your son’s face lit up with enthusiasm, then the Raptors players started pulling him down the ice with them, his delighted laughter bouncing around the rink.

Sungchan leisurely skated over and stopped in front of you. With a great flourish, he bowed and offered his hand out to you. You laughed, placing your hand atop his, and he dropped a kiss to the back of your gloved fingers. He stood up straight again, pulling you off the wall with little resistance from you, before taking both your hands and beginning to skate backwards in front of you, guiding you along with him. Neither of you chose to mention the fact that you knew how to skate just fine, playing along with the fun of the moment as he easily took you around the rink that you were sure he could navigate with his eyes closed at this point.

“Oh, do we have dishwasher pods on the list?” You suddenly asked as soon as the thought popped into your mind.

“We put it on there last night when we loaded the dishwasher and saw that we were almost out,” he reassured you, not even breaking stride.

“Right, thanks.” You smiled, giving his hands a squeeze.

“I also put dish soap on there this morning, by the way.”

“I love you.”

He slowed the two of you down on the far side of the rink, letting go of one of your hands to wrap an arm around your waist and pull you closer. “I love you too, baby.”

After doing a few things out and about, the three of you headed home.

“Hey, buddy,” Sungchan called for your son’s attention, his hands occupied with groceries. “Do you want me or Mommy to help you get ready for your nap? Or are you going to try to do it yourself?”

“Mm…” He looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully. “Mommy!”

“Alright, help with the groceries then I’ll help you, Binnie,” you bargained, putting a bag down on the ground in his reach.

As Woobin dutifully put the bags of chips and boxes of gummies on the lower shelves of the pantry that he could reach, you and Sungchan quickly put away the rest of the groceries. When there was just cleaning and other household supplies left, your husband grabbed those and nodded towards your son.

“Go put buddy down, I’ve got this.”

“Thanks, Channie,” you pecked his cheek before turning to your child. “Lead the way!”

Woobin was able to get into his pajamas by himself, so you were really just there to tuck him in and kiss his forehead. You never bought into the “cry themselves out” mindset from the get-go, and to this day would sit with him until he fell asleep if he asked.

Except this time, he didn’t get into bed at all, standing next to the piece of furniture with you and staring at it like you were about to cliff dive instead of nap. He looked up at you, and you already saw his bottom lip quivering.

“Mommy?”

“Yeah, Binnie, I’m right here, my sweet,” you promised, kneeling down in front of him so you were eye-to-eye. “What’s wrong?”

He threw his arms around your neck, taking quick, shallow breaths as he very bravely tried to communicate with you. “I don’t wanna—I don’t wanna…”

“Okay, I won’t make you right now,” you promised, rubbing his back. “Will you tell me what’s making you upset? Is it the nap? Going to sleep? Did you have a bad dream?”

But he had already devolved into incomprehensible sobs, and you bit your lip at the twinge in your chest. “Alright, sweet, how about we go to Mommy and Daddy’s room? Hm? And I’ll read you something. If you don’t want to nap, you don’t have to today, okay? Sound good?”

You could feel him nod into your shoulder, and that was all you needed to pick him up and settle him on your hip to carry him out of his room. As you passed by Sungchan putting away new bottles of dish soap and dishwasher pods under the sink, he gave you a concerned look. You mouthed a ‘later’ to him as you took your son across your house and into your room. As you passed by your bookshelf, you quickly selected a book, then sat down at the head of your bed, Woobin on your lap. Pulling your blanket up over you two, you let him get settled in and comfortable, still very much crying all the while.

Holding your book with one hand and resting the other on his back, you started reading. After a while, his sobs died down to hiccups, which petered out to just the occasional sniffle. But you could see that he was still awake, his eyes open and following your place as you read. Then, after a while longer, they started to slowly fall shut and his chin would tilt down, then he’d quickly open his eyes again and jerk his head up. Finally, he couldn’t fight the heaviness of his lids, and he fell asleep. You put your bookmark in where you were just before his eyes closed, but kept reading past that, just in case. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the door handle slowly turn, and your bedroom door inch open before Sungchan peered in.

Your husband pointed to the boy in your lap, then made a gesture of pretending to sleep on a pillow, lifting his eyebrows questioningly after. You nodded, still reading softly.

Sungchan slipped in the room, closing the door quietly behind him as well. Having come to a stopping place, you finally closed your book and set it aside on the one you already had on your nightstand.

“Really? You’re reading Breton lais to our child?” Sungchan’s teasing whisper was barely audible. “He’s going to start school saying stuff like nary and furthermore.”

“Says the man who knew I was reading a Breton lai,” you shot back just as quietly.

“Getting married to a lit professor, you pick up a few things.” He then looked down at Woobin. “What happened?”

You sighed and readjusted slightly to hold him tighter now that you had two free arms. “I don’t know. He couldn’t tell me. As soon as he had to get into bed for his nap he just… broke down.”

A deep frown cut across Sungchan’s face as he stroked your son’s hair, but he said nothing else. He left the room, and you heard him moving around throughout the house as you picked up the other book from your nightstand. Eventually, he meandered back in, sitting on his side of the bed and setting up his laptop to quietly work beside you as your son continued napping on your lap and you continued your book. In addition to doing research at the university and being the assistant coach for the hockey team, Sungchan had picked up teaching a couple of Intro to Biology for majors sections, and you could see him answering emails from his students out of the corner of your eye. You were rereading the material for the Direct Study you were leading next semester.

Eventually, Woobin slowly started stirring, grumbling, yawning, and rubbing at his eyes before burying his face back in your chest with a sigh. You stroked his back, attention still on your book. He turned over in your arms when he finally decided that he was awake, blinking his eyes open and staring off into the middle distance.

“Hey, Binnie, you awake?” Sungchan asked quietly.

He nodded slowly, stretching his arms up, and you had to duck your head out of the way to avoid getting smacked in the face by a stray hand.

“Sleep good?” Your husband kept talking to him.

He nodded again, letting out another adorable little yawn.

“Of course you did,” Sungchan chuckled, gently pinching the tip of his nose. “You got the best seat in the house right there, bud.”

Woobin made grabby hands at Sungchan, and he moved his laptop to the side to transfer him from your lap to his, pressing a kiss to his forehead once he was settled in against his chest.

“Uncle Chenle is going to be over soon,” you reminded your son of your plans for the night. “Are you excited?”

He perked up at this. “Yeah! He said he was gonna bring me back a souvenir!”

“He does love to spoil you,” Sungchan shook his head, ruffling the boy’s hair.

As Woobin busied himself with his toys in his room, the horrors of naptime all but forgotten, you and Sungchan were having a fervent, whispered conversation in your bedroom.

“Should we even go tonight?” You asked, pulling your outfit on.

“I know, I’m worried about bedtime…” Sungchan sighed, nevertheless assisting you with your zipper.

“Chenle’s really good with him, and you know how much he dotes on Woobin.” You paused in front of the mirror, smoothing out the wrinkles. You weren’t sure if you were trying to convince yourself or your husband at this point.

“I know, I don’t doubt how much he loves our kid, or how much buddy loves him,” he replied, fidgeting with his tie behind you. “I just… would hate to not be there.”

“Me too,” you replied quietly, turning around to fix his tie yourself. “I can practically feel the stress migraine coming on thinking about it.”

“Okay, well don’t do that, baby,” Sungchan insisted, resting his hands on your waist to pull you closer. “I mean, that didn’t happen at bedtime yesterday, did it?”

“No, it didn’t,” you agreed. “Or naptime yesterday…”

“Who’s to say it’ll happen at bedtime today?” He suggested. “Might’ve been a one-time thing. Or only for naps.”

“Right.” You breathed out, having finished with his tie, and now looked up at him questioningly. “So we’re going?”

“Seems like it.”

“We should still give Chenle a heads-up.”

“Of course.”

Chenle pulled up in his sleek luxury car soon after, and you made sure to greet him at the door while Sungchan helped Woobin put his toys up.

“Whew! Look at you!” Chenle whistled as he pulled back from hugging you, grabbing your hand and twirling you around. “MILF! MILF! MILF!”

You laughed, shaking him off. “Quiet! You’re a menace, I swear. You better be filtering around my child.”

“Of course, of course.” He held his hands up in surrender, and you saw that one held a gift bag. A rather large gift bag.

“And what did you bring him this time? Milan, was it?”

“A model of the Arco della Pace for us to build together, of course.”

“Oh, of course.” You shook your head fondly, but couldn’t stop the worry from overtaking your mood. “Chenle, I do have to tell you something.”

Your friend immediately matched your change in mood, furrowing his brow with concern. “Everything okay, Y/N?”

“When I was trying to put Binnie down for his nap today, he couldn’t get into his bed. He couldn’t tell me what was wrong, he just started crying and saying he didn’t want to. He had to take his nap in our room with the two of us. I don’t know what’s wrong, but I wanted to give you a heads up, in case it happens again at bedtime, since I know you always say he’s really good for you. If it does, just call and we’ll come right back, okay? Don’t feel bad at all, it’s not your fault.”

Chenle listened carefully and nodded thoughtfully as you explained the situation to him. “Okay, yeah. Are you two sure you even want to go? We can all have a really fun hangout with Uncle Chenle and then I can peace before bedtime if that’s what needs to happen tonight.”

You gnawed on your bottom lip, but ultimately shook your head. “We told Ten we were going to be there. I’d like to at least try to see him accept the award.”

“Of course.” Chenle patted his chest. “I won’t take it personally if he starts crying for Mommy at bedtime tonight.”

“When you put it like that I really don’t want to go.”

“Go,” he insisted. “We’ll be fine.”

“Uncle Chenle!” A delighted squeal came as your son ran in, wrapping himself around Chenle’s legs like a koala.

“Hey, Binnie!” Your friend beamed down at him, squeezing his cheeks in one hand. “How are you?”

“I’m good!” His words were a little garbled as Chenle smushed his face.

“Hey, Chenle,” Sungchan greeted him as well, patting him on the shoulder as he walked by to get to your side.

“Hey, Sungchan!”

“Are you ready to go, hon?” Your husband asked you as the other two started an enthusiastic guessing game of what Chenle brought Woobin back as a souvenir from Milan.

“Yeah.” You nodded. Raising your voice slightly to address the others, you announced, “Alright, guys, we’re heading out. Binnie, Daddy and I will be back after you’re asleep, okay?”

“Goodbye and goodnight!” He darted over as you and Sungchan knelt down to each give him a hug, and two more kisses—one for goodbye, and another for his goodnight kiss, since you wouldn’t be putting him to bed. Really, when you came home, you two always checked on him and gave him one last peck goodnight then, but he of course didn’t know that.

The award for Literary Theory Journal Editor of the Year had barely been placed in Ten’s hands when you saw Sungchan’s phone light up in his lap out of the corner of your eye. He squeezed your shoulder in a silent ‘be right back’ before standing from your table and quietly slipping out of the ballroom. You kept your eyes on Ten as he gave a short and charismatic acceptance speech, clapping when everyone else did, though you stayed keenly aware of the empty seat next to you. Your friend got his picture taken and shook lots of hands on his way back to your table, and your colleagues at your table all rose to greet him when he finally returned.

“Congrats, Ten,” you hugged him, your eyes straying over his shoulder to the door that Sungchan had left through.

“Thanks, Y/N,” he patted your back, pulling away still with a wide grin. “I saw Sungchan get up, is everything alright?”

You waved off his concerns for now. “Chenle probably set off the smoke alarm or something.”

Sungchan returned just a moment later, staving off his clearly concerned face for long enough to give Ten his congrats as well.

“You missed my hilarious acceptance speech, Sungchan,” Ten clicked his tongue in feigned disappointment.

“Damn, maybe next year.”

“Ooh, you think I’ll win next year too?”

“Why not?” Sungchan shrugged. “I don’t know how all the other editors could suddenly get better than you in a year.”

“Great point.”

The awards had continued, and everyone took their seats, though your focus was only on Sungchan and whatever that call was about. He leaned over to inform you quietly, “That was Chenle. SOS for buddy’s bedtime, sounds like the same as naptime.”

You bit your lip and nodded.

“I’ll get the car,” he murmured before giving your shoulder a fleeting touch and leaving your table.

You turned to Ten to give him a real reason behind your sudden departure. “Hey, that was Chenle, and Woobin is—”

“It’s all good,” your friend cut you off with a smile, patting your arm. “Go be good parents, you’ve already been good friends. Promise.”

“Thanks.” You could feel the relieved smile on your face. “Congrats again, Ten.”

After giving your hushed goodbyes to the rest of your colleagues, you hurried out of the ballroom. Sungchan didn’t complain about the anxious death grip you had on his hand the entire ride home, simply smoothing his thumb over your knuckles as the fingers of his other hand tapped out impatient rhythms on the steering wheel at every red light you got stuck at.

Finally, you arrived home, and you didn’t even have to go searching for Woobin and Chenle, as you were barely in your foyer and Sungchan hadn’t even had the chance to finish locking the front door behind him when a small form came running in, barreling into your legs. Chenle was a few steps behind your son, entering right after him. Woobin was blubbering and sobbing against you, beyond the point of any sort of intelligible speech. You sighed forlornly and rested a hand on his head, feeling your heart break as you looked down at him, not knowing how to help him.

Sungchan immediately took your purse from your other hand, rubbing your back briefly as he passed by. As he and Chenle went to talk in the living room, you hooked your hands under your son’s arms and heaved him up onto your hip, carrying him into your room with you. You maneuvered to support him with one arm so you could take off your shoes with the other hand, tossing them in the vague direction of your closet door. Sitting on the edge of your bed, you readjusted him so that he was sitting in your lap, crying into your neck, and you gently stroked the back of his head as he shook in your arms.

“I’m right here, Binnie. I’ve got you. Mommy’s right here,” you told him softly, a hard lump growing in your throat. “You’re okay, my sweet. You’re okay. I promise, I’ve got you.”

Eventually, you heard Chenle and Sungchan’s hushed voices pass by, then the front door open and close. A couple minutes later, there was a soft knocking at your bedroom door.

“Hey, that’s Daddy,” you informed Woobin. “Is it okay if he comes in and stays with us too?”

Woobin nodded from where his face was still hidden in your neck. His sobs hadn’t stopped, and at this rate, you were worried he was going to make himself throw up with how much he was crying and hiccupping.

“Come in,” you called out.

Sungchan had already discarded his suit jacket and tie elsewhere, you realized as he slipped into the room. A pained look quickly took over his features as his eyes immediately found the two of you. He set the no-spill cup he’d brought in with him—Woobin’s favorite cartoon characters printed all around the outside—down on your nightstand as he sat down next to you.

“Hey, buddy, it’s me,” Sungchan said quietly. “I brought some water; I thought your throat might be hurting a little.”

You son let out a couple sniffles, as if contemplating this for the first time.

Your husband continued, “Do you think you can sit with me and drink some water while Mommy changes into her jammies?”

“I won’t leave the room, sweet,” you assured him. “I’ll be right here with you and Daddy.”

In lieu of a verbal response, he nodded again and loosened the vice-like grip he’d had around your neck, letting you shift him over into his dad’s arms. Before you could go run and do the fastest change of your life, Sungchan grabbed your hand, pulling you around to look at him. As you gazed down at him, with Woobin bawling inconsolably in his lap, the two of you exchanged a brief, unspoken moment of uncertainty, unknowing, of knowing that neither of you knew what to do for your son. Your hand was shaking—or maybe that was his—as you clutched each other tightly for just a second.

Then you had to let go of him to rush to change, and Sungchan tried to gently coax Woobin into taking a sip of water. You could hear him coaching your son through taking just one little sip at a time and not chugging, or he’d make himself sick. You, meanwhile, were throwing clothes into the general vicinity of where they needed to go as you pulled on new ones. The nice material now had snot and spit all over them, you were sure they’d need to be dry-cleaned anyway, so you didn’t care about the wrinkles they’d garner from being crumpled up on the floor for the night. You then rushed through taking out your hair and brushing your teeth, keeping the en suite bathroom door open all the while.

Back over with your husband and son, you saw that the task of sipping water had forced his crying to slow down considerably, and you took a deep breath to not pass on your stress back to your child. The last thing you needed to do was get him going again just because you were so worried. He also had his favorite stuffed animal tucked under his other arm, the only one that had survived from his infancy to now, a deer plushie. You didn’t even remember seeing Sungchan bring that in with him, your brain was so scrambled.

“Here, Binnie, Mommy’s back. I feel left out, I’m not the only one not in my jammies,” Sungchan joked, which didn’t even earn a giggle from your child as it normally would’ve. “You want to go back to Mommy and I’ll get changed?”

Woobin nodded, and Sungchan let you get into a more comfortable position up by the headboard before depositing your son into your arms. You could at least see some of his face from the new angle of him sitting sideways in your lap, and it was of course red, puffy, and covered in tears. Sungchan must have already cleaned up some of his snot, as you spotted several discarded tissues on the nightstand.

“Did Puck come to make sure you were okay, too?” You asked quietly, gently tapping one of the plushie’s soft antlers. Puck the Buck, as he had been so brilliantly named some time ago.

Another nod and a sniffle.

“That was nice of him.” You stroked the deer’s head. “Thank you, Puck.”

Woobin patted the deer’s head, too, and as you watched more tears fall down his cheeks, you pressed a long kiss to his hair, silently apologizing for not knowing how to fix it all right now. Sungchan came back from the bathroom just a moment later, scooting onto the bed from the other side.

“Okay, Binnie. What do you think? Do you want to watch an episode of your show?” He suggested. “Or Mommy can finish reading you Bisclavret? Or…”

As he tried to think of other options, you gave him a bewildered look over your son’s head at the fact that he apparently knew which Breton lai you were reading earlier. That was something to address later, though.

Woobin shook his head, though.

“No?” Sungchan said questioningly. “No to what? Do you want Mommy to read?”

Head shake.

“Do you want to watch an episode of your show?”

Head nod.

And so you, Woobin, Puck, and Sungchan all settled in under your covers to watch an episode of his favorite cartoon. Except you and Sungchan didn’t have a TV in your bedroom, and both of your laptops were charging across the house in your home office, so you all had to scoot in close to be able to see it on the much smaller screen of Sungchan’s phone. Puck took up a considerable amount of space when crowding around a phone to watch something, and from your vantage point mostly behind your son and the plushie, you couldn’t see a thing past the deer head and antlers, but you didn’t really care about catching up on the children’s cartoon. You were much more preoccupied with listening for Woobin’s sniffles to cease, and watching as his breathing evened out. He was still awake after one episode, but quiet, calm, and Sungchan went ahead and played the next one.

You gently rubbed his back, smiling to yourself when you heard his first yawn of the night. When his second came before the five-minute mark, you knew he wouldn’t last the whole episode. And sure enough, he was out before the halfway point. Sungchan turned his phone off and set it aside. The two of you were curled up on either side of your son, with Sungchan facing him and you.

Your husband reached a hand up, and you thought he was going to stroke Woobin’s hair, but he kept going and gently wiped a thumb under your eye instead, at the fresh tears that had just brimmed there. You placed your hand over his, turning your head just enough to leave a kiss on his palm.

You woke up early in the morning with a stress migraine. When you shuffled into the kitchen to get a glass of water, the stove clock read 3:03. You quickly chugged your first glass of water, then refilled it to take back with you. Walking through to your bathroom, you retrieved your bottle of rescue medication from your drawer. This one was a muscle relaxer, so you didn’t see any point in keeping it in your purse, as you weren’t able to drive after taking it, which you typically needed to do when you were out and about. You knocked back a tablet before screwing the lid back on and putting it away again. After taking a few more sips of your water, you slipped back under the covers with your family.

Your head felt like it was being squeezed in a vice, but you still blearily opened one eye to look at your son, watching as his chest rose and fell peacefully. He was on his back now, and you couldn’t help but lay a hand on his front, feeling his even breaths under your palm. Sungchan’s foot tapped yours under the blanket briefly as he readjusted in his sleep, and you smiled to yourself. And then it happened again, and you peered over to the other pillow suspiciously.

In the low light, you could see Sungchan looking right at you. He pointed to his own head, then raised his eyebrows.

You lifted your hand in a ‘meh’ gesture, then held up 5 fingers to rate it out of 10, before setting your hand back down on Woobin’s front. Sungchan found your arm under the covers, gently squeezing your forearm. You tapped his foot in return, a silent exchange, before closing your eyes and settling back in to sleep.

Two hushed voices woke you up for the second time that morning. Well, one hushed voice, and one who hadn’t quite mastered whispering yet.

“What do you think Mommy—”

“Quiet, buddy, remember?” Sungchan’s words were barely discernible from behind the closed bathroom door. “Your mom’s got a migraine, and—”

“—and Mommy needs to sleep when she’s got a migraine,” Woobin finished dutifully, his voice a notch quieter than before. “So her head feels better.”

“That’s right, bud. Now come on, breakfast.”

“That’s what I—” Your son stopped himself as his voice raised with his excitement. He continued, in his best half-whisper, “Sorry, Daddy. I know: We gotta whisper. Quiet. I was asking what Mommy wants for breakfast?”

The two of them were quiet, and you heard the bathroom door open, then one pair of feet quietly tread across your room to open the bedroom, then shut it softly. You could hear their voices slowly fade as they walked further away.

“I don’t know. Why are you asking?”

“Because you always bring me breakfast in bed when I’m sick!” Woobin’s voice was back to it’s normal volume as he tried to emphatically get his point across to his dad. Sungchan must have gestured for him to quiet down again, as he dropped down to a part-whisper once more, “It’s Mommy’s turn.”

“You’re right. Let’s see what we can make…”

When you first got Woobin, you only got a migraine a couple times a year, a significant drop from when you were first diagnosed. The frequency fluctuated over the years and seasons, though, and there was a short period of time after becoming new parents, that you had been getting them weekly. You knew that put a strain on Sungchan, since a spouse with noise-sensitive migraines and a crying baby didn’t exactly mix. You of course would go through any migraine pain to take care of your son, but your husband couldn’t stand seeing you do it if it could be avoided. After some medication changes, you were fairly consistent with one every other month now. When Woobin was a toddler, and couldn’t quite grasp the concept of needing to play quietly when he wasn’t napping, Sungchan would take him on “field trips” while you rested. You’d decided to give him a simple explanation of a migraine to him when he was a little older, so he could easier differentiate between the migraines that you got, and when he might have a headache from a cold, or because his body was telling him he needed to drink some more water. He was also now your designated band-aid picker for your monthly injection, and had a better grasp on when, why, and how to keep quiet when you needed it.

Your head unfortunately still hurt, though your heart was warmed by your kind-hearted kid. There were lots of times where you and Sungchan felt like you had no clue what you were doing—like your current predicament with bedtime—but you figured you were doing a pretty alright job overall.

You contemplated getting up to take another dose. The only plans you had for today were a family trip to the park and some chores at home. Your husband would probably insist on you skipping the park for today, but if the second dose worked, you could probably get some things done around the house at least. Unfortunately, your days of laying in bed all day when you had a low-level migraine were long gone. If you could open your eyes, you usually had something that needed to get done.

But for this morning, at least, for now, you could close your eyes for just a little longer. You rolled over, away from the window where a thin strip of light had gotten in through a gap between your blackout curtains that Sungchan must have pulled closed.

You didn’t quite go back to sleep, but you dozed somewhere in between as you fondly listened to the sounds of Sungchan and Woobin trying to make breakfast as silently as possible. The running of the sink, sizzling of something on the stove, beep of the microwave before it was hastily shut off, fridge opening and closing, Sungchan’s quiet murmured directions to Woobin, and your son’s inquisitive tone in return.

Eventually, you heard someone shuffling up to your bedroom door, sounding much too small to be your husband. The door very slowly creaked open, and he tiptoed over to your side of the bed.

“Mommy?” His whisper had gotten better over the morning, though it didn’t matter much, since he was definitely right in front of your face.

You cracked open one eye, and offered him a soft smile. “Morning, buddy.”

“Are you awake?”

“Yeah, Binnie, I’m awake,” you chuckled, propping yourself up on one elbow and rubbing your eyes.

“Daddy and I made you breakfast, hold on!” And he darted back out of the room.

You looked at the empty doorway fondly, slowly pushing yourself up into a sitting position at the head of the bed. Sungchan and Woobin reappeared a moment later with a tray filled with various breakfast foods.

“Morning, beautiful,” Sungchan greeted you quietly, pecking the crown of your head as he went to set the tray down in your lap.

“Mm, morning, Channie,” you kissed his cheek before he could stand all the way back up. “This looks wonderful, thank you guys.”

In one corner of the tray you spotted a colorful assortment of pills, all of your morning doses plus what looked like a couple of your acute medications from your purse that was definitely in the dining room. You grabbed your water from the nightstand to get that out of the way first.

“We’ll let you eat in peace,” Sungchan declared, patting your son on the head to start to usher him out.

“No, it’s okay,” you stopped them. “It’s not so bad. I want you two to eat with me.”

Woobin’s face lit up, and he wasted no time in clambering up on the bed with you. You held the tray steady as he wedged himself in next to you.

“Alright, I’ll go get mine and buddy’s plates.”

Woobin was still earnestly pointing out each piece of food on your tray to you, explaining exactly how he had helped Sungchan prepare all of it when your husband returned. Sungchan sat down in front of you, and as he handed your son his plate, you noticed that there was nothing on it that could make too much of a mess if it happened to capsize.

“Sounds like you were a big help,” you praised your son, stroking the back of his head.

“He was,” Sungchan agreed. “Breakfast in bed was his idea.”

“Really?” You feigned surprise as Woobin nodded proudly. They didn’t need to know that you’d heard their entire bathroom conversation. “Thank you, sweet, it was a very good idea.”

After a very quiet breakfast, Sungchan took the plates into the kitchen, and you started making your mental list of tasks for the day. No vacuum—you weren’t a masochist—but there was laundry to do, and if Sungchan started the dishwasher before he left, it would be done and ready to put away before they got back from the park.

Just as you had put your feet over the edge of the bed to get up, with the bathroom as your destination, you were caught off-guard by Woobin trudging into your room with an armful of toys. He dropped them onto your mattress before hauling himself up after them.

“Hey…” You greeted him with an air of question. “What are you doing, Binnie?”

Sungchan must have spotted him on his way over, as he poked his head in right then, already laser-focused on your son. “What’s all this, bud?”

“We can’t go to the park,” he said matter-of-factly, beginning to sort out the toys that had gotten all mixed up in being carried over and dumped into a pile. “I’ll be quiet, promise!”

“I didn’t say we weren’t going at all,” Sungchan clarified. “I just said Mommy needed to stay home this time, because she’s not feeling well. You and I are still going. Minha and her dad are going to be there too.”

“I don’t want to go. I don’t like the park,” he declared, a stern pout creasing his face.

“What? You don’t like the park?” You asked.

“No,” he mumbled. “I hate it.”

You exchanged bewildered looks with Sungchan at this sudden development. Deciding to try again, you said calmly, “Binnie, I’ll go with you next time, okay? I promise. You have lots of fun at the park.”

“No. I don’t want to go.”

“Okay, no park,” Sungchan acquiesced. “But it’s such a nice day out, I think a walk sounds good. What do you think?”

“No.” He crossed his arms.

“Ah, you know, my head feels good enough for a walk,” you said brightly. “I think I’d like to go on a walk. Are you sure you don’t want to go, buddy?”

“Well… okay.”

“Alright,” you beamed at him, patting his cheek as he finally looked up at you. “Mommy’s got to shower then I’ll be ready to go.”

“How about you get out of your jammies too, Woobin?” Sungchan suggested.

“Go ahead, sweet,” you sent him off with one more pat.

Your son wordlessly got off the bed and left your room. As soon as he was gone, you look at Sungchan, utterly at a loss.

“What was that?” He whispered, following you into the bathroom and shutting the door behind you two.

“I don’t know,” you whispered back, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“He loves the park! I mean, he loves going to the grocery store! He’s one of the most go-with-the-flow kids I’ve ever met!”

“He was obviously lying about hating the park. But why? His best friend’s going to be there, he’s been talking about it since we planned it at pickup on Friday.”

“You think it’s related to what’s been going with bedtime and naptime?” Sungchan paced in front of you. “I mean, what if it’s like separation anxiety? Or something?”

“But he loves you.”

“I know, I know.”

“He even went through that phase when he was a year old where he wouldn’t let me put him to sleep, it had to be you every time.”

“I know, I know.” He held his hands up. “I’m just saying… we might have hit a new phase.”

“But I could at least take him to the park without you. And he went to daycare. Now…”

“Hey, tomorrow, I’ll drop him off at school,” Sungchan said. “You know, so it’ll be gradual. The two of us at home, then just me, then he’s at school.”

“Channie, he wouldn’t let you take him to the park today.”

“I just think that if your choice is between leaving him crying at VPK or not, you’re going to be getting a new little TA in your classes tomorrow.”

You chewed on your bottom lip before sighing and nodding. “You’re right, you’re right. Okay, we’ll try your way tomorrow.”

“We’ll figure this out, hon,” he reassured you, wrapping his arms around your waist and hooking his chin over your shoulder. “But not right now in our bathroom while you’ve got a migraine.”

You hugged him back, burying your face in his neck and taking a deep breath. “Yeah, you’re right. Let’s just worry about today right now.”

After your shower, you got dressed in peace and meandered out of your room to find Sungchan and Woobin by the front door. Woobin hadn’t quite mastered shoelaces, so your husband was helping him out. You slipped your own shoes on, and grabbed a pair of sunglasses on the table by the front door.

“Alright, ready?” Sungchan asked, having finished with your son’s shoes.

“Ready!” Binnie chirped.

You offered a thumbs-up, silently reaching to unlock your front door. Woobin went out first, eagerly bounding down the steps of your front porch. You followed after him onto the sidewalk as you listened to Sungchan lock up behind you, then catch up to the two of you with just a few large strides. The sun outside was painfully bright, even with your sunglasses on, and as you held up one hand to cast a shadow over your eyes, you reached your other out to grab Sungchan’s hand. He held yours firmly, even as you squinted and winced against the light, nearly missing a step when you walked in a brighter patch between shadows of trees, keeping you upright and on the paved path.

Woobin was just a couple steps in front of you, seemingly having a great time. He was talking to himself, interspersed with some singing, and of course pointing out anything he found remotely interesting to the both of you.

“Snail!” He yelled out enthusiastically, pointing to said small creature on the ground.

“Cool, buddy,” Sungchan responded encouragingly.

“Worm!”

“I see. Careful, we don’t want to step on him. He’s using the sidewalk too.”

That made Woobin giggle, giving the worm a wide berth as he stepped around it. You stepped over it.

The boy suddenly gasped, and stopped in his tracks as he pointed to a flower in one of your neighbors’ gardens. “Butterfly! Mommy, do you see it?”

You squinted in the direction he was pointing, finally seeing which one he was indicating. A dark butterfly on a bright yellow flower. “Yeah, Binnie, I see it. That’s a swallowtail butterfly.”

“Swallowtail butterfly,” he repeated, slowly to make sure he was pronouncing it right.

“That’s right.” You patted his head with your free hand.

“What other kinds of butterflies are there?” He asked as you continued your walk.

“Oh, lots,” you mused. “Your dad might know a butterfly expert, you know.”

He looked up at Sungchan with wide, hopeful eyes.

“Yeah, Dr. Hwang, one of my co-workers, she’s an entomologist.”

Your son furrowed his brows in concentration. “Entee— enah— innamolologiss.”

“Come on, let’s sound it out, bud: En,” Sungchan talked him through it. Despite his earlier teasing of you reading Breton lai to your son, your husband was just as much to blame for Woobin’s inflated vocabulary, always taking the time to teach him lengthy scientific terms for things.

“En.”

“Tah.”

“Tah.”

“Mol.”

“Mol.”

“Oh.”

“Oh.”

“Gist.”

“Gist.”

“Entah.”

“Entah.”

“Molo.”

“Molo.”

“Gist.”

“Gist.”

“Entomologist.”

“Enamolgist.”

“Yeah!” Your husband beamed, holding up his hand for a high five.

“What’s an enamolgist?” Woobin asked.

“A scientist that studies bugs. Like butterflies.”

“Butterflies aren’t bugs!” He insisted.

“They are.”

“But how can they be bugs? They’re butterflies!”

Sungchan laughed. “When you meet Dr. Hwang, you can ask her and she’ll explain it. She can also tell you all about all sorts of butterflies. Okay?”

“Your dad studies fish, remember?” You added. “Way different than bugs and butterflies.”

“And you study books!” Woobin said. “And stories! And reading! And writing!”

“That’s right.” You chuckled fondly. “Way, way different than bugs or butterflies or fish.”

By the time you got back to your house, you could barely open one eye enough to navigate the steps and get through the front door. It felt like you were being stabbed in your left eye, the pain shooting back through the entire left side of your head, and you patted Sungchan’s arm before wordlessly heading off towards your room. You beelined for your bathroom, knocking back another dose of the rescue medication you had in there.

As you clutched your eye with one hand and gripped the bathroom counter tightly with the other, the door was pushed ajar. You quickly went to drop your hand and throw on a smile, then saw it was Sungchan, who put another tablet into your hand, your second rescue medication in the dining room.

“Thanks, baby,” you mumbled, taking that one as well.

He sighed, but said nothing else as he rested a hand on your back. You covered both of your eyes as you turned into his chest, feeling when your fingers quickly turned moist. You took deep, shaking, quiet breaths. One of Sungchan’s hands cradled the back of your head while the other slowly rubbed up and down your back.

“Eye mask?” He murmured, referring to the cooling eye mask you kept in the fridge to help with migraine pain. It could also be microwaved if you wanted it warm instead.

“What’s Binnie doing?” You sniffed.

“Picking a movie for me and him. You’re going to lay down. Do you want your eye mask?”

“Yes, please.”

And so Sungchan grabbed the mask from the fridge for you as you crawled back into bed, handing you your earplugs from your nightstand drawer first.

You tried to refuse, eyes drifting towards your bedroom door. “No, but—”

“I’ve got him, hon.” He opened the case and pushed the earplugs into your hand. “You’ve done plenty, Supermom. Okay?”

You nodded slowly, pushing the earplugs in one at a time. He helped you adjust the eye mask, then pulled the covers up over you. You felt as he stood up from the bed and gave one final pat to your arm.

You woke up to find that the medication and nap had taken the edge off the migraine, at least. There was still a dull ache in your head, and you felt like shit, but it wasn’t the worst that you’d ever felt. You pulled the room-temperature mask off your face and set it on your nightstand before rolling over, fully intending on burying your face in your pillow and going back to sleep if you could.

You weren’t expecting to see Sungchan lying next to you on top of the covers, hand tucked under his cheek. His eyes were open, watching you.

“Hi, Channie,” you said quietly, taking your earplugs out and setting those aside as well.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, voice barely above a murmur.

“I’m alright. Still hurts, but not as bad,” you replied, reaching a hand out towards him. He grasped it, gentle but steadfast. “Where’s Binnie? Down for his nap?”

“Snacktime. I called in backup, though, my dad’s here.”

“I’m—” You stopped yourself before you could apologize, biting down on your lip before mustering up a smile. “Thank you. For taking care of me and buddy today. More than you usually do.”

“I wish I could’ve done more for you, baby,” he sighed, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.

“You were making sure our son was okay. He can’t use the microwave, I can manage my ten-thousandth migraine on my own.”

“But you shouldn’t have to.”

“It’s not your fault,” you insisted. “You’ve been Superdad and Superhusband today. So relax, okay?”

“Alright.”

“How long is your dad staying?”

“He brought ingredients to make dinner. My mom’s coming when she gets off her shift.”

You smiled fondly at your in-laws’ kindness, and lifted the blankets up. “Five more minutes?”

Sungchan joined you under the covers, immediately wrapping his arms around you and burying his face in your neck. You held him close, savoring his familiar warmth and the comforting pressure of him laying practically on top of you. You curled your fingers in his hair, resting your cheek against the crown of his head.

“Ten,” he mumbled against your skin. “Ten more minutes.”

“Hey Professor, mind if we hang out in here?” A familiar pair of heads had poked into your office, two freshmen Raptors players who definitely weren’t in any of your classes this semester.

“Is there somewhere you should be?” You asked, gesturing to the couch across from you nevertheless. It made no difference to you if two adults decided to skip their college classes, you were more-so just curious. “It’s a bit early to be getting to campus if you don’t have a class…”

“Well, we usually have Coach Jung’s class right now, but he just sent out an email cancelling,” the left wing explained, dropping into one corner as his friend splayed out across the remaining two-thirds.

“And our next class is in this building, so we thought we’d see if you were in,” the right wing finished.

“What class do you have in this building?” You tried to keep a casual tone as you checked your phone for any missed calls or text from Sungchan that would clue you into why he’s suddenly missed his class this morning.

As they proceeded to rant about the 2000-level Grammar class they had signed up for in order to fulfill their Gen Ed requirements, mistakenly thinking it would be easy since it was only a 2000-level, you sent a quick text to your husband.

[you: just checking in. did drop-off go okay?]

Woobin once again slept in yours and Sungchan’s room last night, and though he was a little confused at his dad taking him to school today since you usually dropped him off on Mondays, there was no meltdown when you gave him his goodbye kiss. So far so good, until now.

“What classes are you teaching in the fall, Professor?” The left wing asked you.

“Oh, uh, I’ve got Lit Theory, Direct Study, and I’m teaching a Special Topics section in Contemporary Short Stories. We’ll mostly be focusing on magical realism, surrealism, that sort of thing,” you started rambling, still half-focused on your dark phone screen, waiting for it to light up with Sungchan’s reply. “I know neither of you are Lang majors, but it’s my first Special Topics class and I enjoyed having both of you last semester, so if you have a free slot in the fall, I’d appreciate it if you considered enrolling.”

“Hell yeah, that sounds cool,” the right wing grinned. “Is it going to be like, a bunch of essays, though?”

“There will be a final paper, but it will be mostly Socratic discussion, and the occasional short, one-page synthesis assignment,” you clarified. “No tests, no quizzes. As long as you read and participate enthusiastically, you’ll pass.”

“We’ll be there!” The left wing promised. “We loved your intro class. You’re like, one of the coolest professors ever, that’s why we asked.”

“I’m honored, boys, thanks,” you laughed.

“Coach Jung is cool too,” said the right wing, then he exchanged a mischievous grin with his friend. “But you’re cooler.”

“Oh, I’ve known that for quite some time, I assure you.”

“How long have you two been together?” The left wing asked curiously.

You twisted your wedding ring contemplatively. “Let’s see… We’ve been married for seven years, we started dating our senior year of undergrad, so… fifteen years? Yeah, it’ll be fifteen years this fall.”

“Wow. I didn’t even think you were that old.”

“What? Fifteen?” You chuckled, eyes straying to the picture on your desk of you, Sungchan, and Woobin from the party you held to celebrate his adoption being finalized.

“I mean, like, old enough to have been in college fifteen years ago.”

“Surprise.”

“So you met in senior year—”

“No,” you shook your head. “That’s when we started dating. We met freshman year. First day of classes, actually, if I’m remembering correctly. In one of Dr. Son’s classes, so that tells you how long he’s been teaching.”

“Wow, he needs to retire,” the right wing snorted. “And I mean that with his best intentions at heart.”

“Why are you two so interested in me and Coach Jung all of a sudden?” You questioned, tilting your head and folding your hands over your lap.

“Well, we see you and Coach Jung and our MVP all the time but, you know, we don’t know a lot about you, outside your jobs,” the left wing shrugged. “You two seem cool, you know?”

You couldn’t help but laugh again. “Where are you guys from?”

As they informed you that they were both from the same small town about five hours away, you nodded in understanding. Freshmen that hadn’t seen their parents since the holidays, a break that was only made even shorter by their being on the hockey team.

“You two are more than welcome to pop into my office whenever you happen to see me in here,” you reassured them. “And talk to me about whatever you want.”

By the time the players had left to go to class, you still hadn’t heard back from Sungchan, and you had your own class to teach. It was your Direct Study, which usually met in your office anyway since it was just two students. The conversation in this one was student-led, so as they evaluated what they thought the developing themes in the book were, bouncing ideas off each other, you tried to listen and engage earnestly, even as you stayed painfully aware of the lack of response from your husband.

You never forced them to stay for the entire block of time allotted for the class if the conversation didn’t need it, so when they were about done only forty-five minutes into the hour and a half block, you gave them the next chunk of the reading to do before next week, and bid them farewell. Then immediately left your office.

The Science building was across from the Lang building, and you headed for Sungchan's office first. If he was teaching a class right now, you knew it would be an Intro class and, therefore, most likely in one of the large lecture halls on the first floor, but you weren’t going to interrupt his lecture because he hadn’t replied to your message. You just wanted to check to see if he'd made it to campus yet. His office was on the second floor, past some of the teaching laboratories.

When you tested the door handle, you found it unlocked, and pushed it open. His desk lamp was on, illuminating the pictures he had there: one from your wedding day, another of the three of you from a hockey game, decked out in blue and orange Raptors gear, and a third of just you and Woobin from when he was a baby, the exact occasion you couldn’t pin down. He wasn’t in the office, but his backpack was on his desk chair, so he had at least made it to campus.

Your phone buzzed in your hand, and you looked to see that it was Sungchan calling.

“Hey, Channie,” you answered.

“Hi, hon,” he sounded a little out of breath. “Where are you?”

“Uhm, I’m actually at your office. I got worried…” You admitted.

“Oh, okay. We went to your office but couldn’t find you. Stay put, we’ll come to you.”

“Okay—Wait, ‘we?’”

“Yeah, uh, buddy’s with me,” he sighed shortly. “We'll be there in just a sec, okay? Bye, love you.”

And he hung up.

When Sungchan’s office door opened a few minutes later, Woobin was, in fact, the first thing that came through, immediately running to wrap his arms around your legs. Sungchan stepped through the door a moment later, looking disheveled as he took your son’s small backpack off his shoulder and put it on one of the chairs across from his desk.

“Hey, Binnie,” you greeted your son brightly, despite your alarm and confusion, hugging him back tightly. The harrowed look on Sungchan’s face was enough to let you know that this was something for you two to talk about later.

“Mommy!” Woobin was practically buzzing with excitement. “Mommy, guess what!”

“What, buddy?”

“Daddy said I can meet an enamolgist today!”

“Wow! That’s awesome,” you patted his head. “Did he say when Dr. Hwang was available?”

“I was just about to call her,” Sungchan answered. “We wanted to find you first, hon.”

“I saw some cool posters in the hall, Binnie,” you let go of your son and offered him your hand. “Let’s go look at those while your dad makes his call, okay?”

“Okay!” He took your hand and let you guide him out into the hall, shutting the office door behind you.

The first one you found was a diagram of a wetland ecosystem, taller than your head, and spanned the entire wall between two offices.

“I can’t see it,” Woobin craned his neck to look at the poster. “Can you pick me up, please?”

You hoisted him up by his underarms and onto your hip. “Is that better?”

“Thank you!” He then pointed to an animal. “What’s that?”

“Here, it’s labeled. Do you see?” You showed him the black line connecting the animal to its common name and scientific name. “Can you read that first one?”

“Spotted… sal… uh… man… der?”

“Spotted salamander, good!” You confirmed.

“So this one is a…” he pointed to another animal, following the line to its name. “Green… ana… con… da. Green anaconda!”

“That’s right, Binnie.”

The two of you were still on that same poster sounding out animal names, when Sungchan poked his head out from his office just a few doors down. Woobin was in the middle of a name, so you indicated to your husband to wait a moment before listening to the boy continue to sound it out. Sungchan walked over to join the two of you as Woobin had just finished his first attempt at the bird’s name.

“That was a good guess, it does look like the words ‘her’ and ‘on,’” you said. “But the animal is pronounced heron.”

“Hair-in,” he echoed slowly.

“You got it. Can you put it together now?”

“Great blue heron.”

“Good job, buddy,” Sungchan praised him.

“Hi, Daddy.”

“Hi, buddy.”

“Did you get a hold of Dr. Hwang?” You asked.

“Yes, she’s in her office right now and has some spare time.”

“Yay!” Your son cheered, starting to wriggle out of your grip.

The three of you trekked to the third floor to get to Dr. Hwang’s office. Dr. Hwang was an older woman who welcomed you in warmly.

“Daddy says butterflies are bugs,” Woobin said very seriously. “Is that true?”

Dr. Hwang looked at Sungchan very judgmentally, before turning her attention down to your son. “Butterflies are insects, yes.”

“But how? They’re butterflies!”

“They’re just one kind of insect,” she explained patiently. “What’s your favorite fruit?”

“Mm… Grapes!”

“Are grapes fruit?”

“Well, yeah.”

“And fruit is food, right?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Grapes are a type of fruit, and fruits are a type of food. Does that make sense so far?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s the same thing with butterflies. Butterflies are a type of insect, and insects are a type of animal.”

He seemed to think very hard about this for a moment, then nodded satisfactorily. “How many kinds of butterflies are there?”

“There are about 180,000 different species of butterflies and moths. That we know about.”

His eyes practically bulged out of his head. “Woah…”

“Would you like to see some?”

“Can I?” He then looked back at you and Sungchan. “Please? Can I?”

“Of course, buddy,” Sungchan smiled, then looked up at his colleague. “If it’s alright with you, Dr. Hwang, my wife and I are going to step out for a moment.”

She waved you off. “Of course, go ahead.”

“Thank you,” you nodded to her gratefully. Patting your son’s head, you informed him, “Daddy and I will be right back, buddy.”

As Dr. Hwang directed Woobin’s attention to a book, you and Sungchan stepped out into the hall, shutting the door behind you quietly.

“What happened?” You asked him fervently.

Sungchan pulled you a little further down the hall, keeping his voice low when he finally spoke. “He was doing fine until we got into his classroom. Got his arms around my neck, wouldn’t let go… Kid’s strong for a five-year-old.”

“Two of your students ended up in my office after you cancelled class.”

“Yeah, I stayed for the first thirty minutes, to try to ease him into it, but then when I tried to leave again, the same thing happened except worse… Kept asking for you.” He ran a hand through his hair. “It was too much of a distraction, we had to leave. He didn’t stop crying until I told him we were going to see you.”

You nodded in understanding, not upset with Sungchan in the slightest. If you’d been in his position, you probably would’ve done the same thing, if not, gave in even sooner.

“Do you think…” You bit the inside of your cheek. “Do you think we should take him to see someone? See if it’s a phase or… something more serious? I mean, even if it is a phase, he’s clearly getting really upset about something…”

“Yeah, I think that’d be a good idea,” Sungchan agreed.

Dr. Kwon Hayoung was a younger woman, definitely no older than yourself and Sungchan if you had to guess, her posture relaxed as she sat in her mustard yellow armchair. Her entire office was colorful, filled with various toys, whimsical artworks, and plush, patterned pillows on the couch that you were currently sitting on with your husband. After lots of research, various recommendations from friends and colleagues at work, and an entire two weeks of Woobin being attached at the hip to one of the two of you, you had finally settled on taking him to Dr. Kwon. After an initial interview with all three of you, then just you and Sungchan (a task that was aided by the fact that Sungchan’s father had come along and occupied him in the meantime), she then evaluated your son, which required several breaks for him to see you. But finally, she had finished with him, and he went back to play with his grandpa while Dr. Kwon brought you and Sungchan back once again.

“There is nothing serious for us to be concerned about,” Dr. Kwon declared, her tone calm.

You and Sungchan exchanged an uncertain look. You cleared your throat, “Uhm…”

“I don’t mean to downplay the problems that your family is facing right now,” the child psychologist promised, readjusting her lavender purple frames on the bridge of her nose. “However, Woobin is developing typically for kids his age, which is good news.”

“Then why is he…?” Sungchan trailed off, his question obvious. Why is he doing all of this? So suddenly?

“You have been very open about him being adopted.”

“Yeah, we never wanted to hide it from him,” you said. “He even gets two parties every year, his birthday party, and we celebrate the day his adoption went through.”

“But he knows that he’s our son and we love him,” Sungchan added, shifting forward as his voice carried a slight edge to it.

“Of course, of course he knows that.” Dr. Kwon’s tone hadn’t lost any of the gentle kindness she began the conversation with. “Both you and he told me about another kid, in his class, who was not so understanding.”

“Yeah, it made buddy a little upset, but he seemed fine by the next day.”

“I do think he was fine. Until he had a recent dream, about falling asleep in his bed and waking up in someone else’s home,” she informed you, and you felt a harsh twinge in your chest as you realized that your son hadn’t even told you about that. “He’s not afraid that you two will give him away so much as he’s afraid that somebody will come take him from you.”

“Oh…” You breathed out, feeling yourself grimace as you thought about how scared your son must have felt since then.

Sungchan reached over to hold one of your hands. “What can we do? What are our options?”

“We can work on his anxiety, coping skills, attachment in sessions. Since it’s affected your daily lives as a family so much, I recommend starting at three times a week, and we can adjust from there. I would like both of you to attend as many as possible.”

“Of course,” you nodded quickly, squeezing Sungchan’s hand tight.

That night, after helping Woobin brush his teeth with his toothbrush and toothpaste that had migrated into your bathroom, you took your nighttime medication, then tucked it back away into the childproofed medicine cabinet. Sungchan was doing some late-night grading in your home office, but you had a five-year-old to put to bed on time, so you had started on that without him.

Woobin clambered up into his place in the middle of the mattress first, and you lifted up the comforter and blankets to slip in next to him. With the thoughts of his nightmare still weighing heavily on your heart, you called out to him quietly, “Binnie? Can Mommy cuddle with you?”

“Of course, Mommy!” He chirped, immediately taking it upon himself to scramble over to you under the covers and wrap himself around your middle like a koala.

You laughed, enveloping him in your arms to hold him to you even tighter. Pressing a long kiss to the top of his head, you then tucked him under your chin. Yeah, this was exactly what you needed. You had his next appointments set up with Dr. Kwon, and she hadn’t told you to change anything you were doing yet. So tomorrow you’d continue your new routine of bringing your son to campus with you and passing him between you and Sungchan—usually whoever was in office hours had him, or if you were both in a class, whoever had the smaller class. You had tried dropping him off at your parents’ house once, but as soon as he realized that you were leaving without him, he wouldn’t let go of your leg, his eyes started watering, and you immediately folded. Preschool was a no-go, as he had a soft, indefinite ban for the foreseeable future until he was no longer going to be a disruption. They were continuing to hold his spot at no charge to you, at least. It had been stressful, and there hadn’t been very long stretches of time in the past two weeks where you had been apart from him, but there wasn’t once where you ever felt resentful towards your son himself, you realized. He’s what you did this all for.

“I love you, Binnie,” you murmured, kissing his hair again. “Love you so much.”

“I love you so much too, Mommy,” Woobin mumbled back sleepily, his words punctuated by a yawn.

You smiled fondly, listening as the sounds of his breathing evened out as he drifted off to sleep. Not much later, and your bedroom door slowly creaked open. Sungchan quietly went about his own nighttime routine before finally shutting the bathroom light off and closing the door behind him. You were a little confused when he walked over to your side of the bed, though, thinking your son’s sippy cup that was sitting there might’ve needed a last-minute refill. Then you felt him raise the sheets and start squeezing himself in behind you.

“You’re going to fall off, Channie,” you whispered, trying to bite back the giggles bubbling up in your chest.

“Then make some room, baby,” he responded, his quiet words even more hushed by the fact that he was pressing his face into your shoulder as he readjusted.

You gently scooted further in on the bed, trying to jostle the child attached to you as little as possible, not wanting to wake him so soon after he’d fallen asleep—if he woke up now, he’d definitely be awake for another three hours at least. Sungchan scooched with you, molding himself around you after you’d gotten settled in again, and burying his face in the back of your neck. He slung an arm over your waist, his hand finding one of yours where it was resting on Woobin’s back, slotting his fingers with yours.

After some time, when you were sure your son was deep asleep, Sungchan spoke again, “I had a student ask me what death of the author is.”

You craned your neck to try to look at his face out of the corner of your eye. “In your bio class?”

“Yeah, I thought it was weird too.”

“Are they… in one of my classes? And thought that you would know because we’re married? And knew that we’re married?” Obviously there were pictures of you, Sungchan, and your son in his office, but since classrooms and labs were shared spaces at the university, professors didn’t decorate or keep personal belongings in there. The average Intro to Bio student wouldn’t have any reason to know that you and Sungchan were married just from attending lecture.

“That was my first thought, too. Turns out he had you last semester.”

You scrunched your nose in confusion. “Then why…?”

“Apparently, in your class, he met this cute Lang major, but she didn’t seem too impressed with him. Thinks he’s a dumb jock.” Sungchan’s chest vibrated with his chuckle.

“Because he doesn’t know what death of the author is? Is he failing your bio class, perchance?”

“No.”

“Did she actually tell him she thought he was a dumb jock, or is he just assuming?” You asked pointedly.

“He seemed pretty convinced.” Your husband grinned and nudged you with his shoulder. “Sound familiar?”

“What are you—Oh my god, you think that sounds like us?” You rolled your eyes. “I did not think you were a dumb jock! I just… didn’t think about you really at all.”

“Ouch.” His pout was still very visible in the dim light of your bedroom.

“Not my fault you opted to pine for three years like a loser instead of talking to me.”

“Words hurt, you know.”

You shook your head. “So were you able to tell him what death of the author is?”

“No. But he’s apparently trying to read along from your Brit Lit I syllabus.”

“So that’s why you knew Bisclavret the other day. He won’t get very far on his own, even translated, Old English can be pretty awkward to get through,” you warned.

“Yeah… So do you have any study guides?” He batted his eyelashes at you, and you once again rolled your eyes.

“Seriously? You should tell him to talk to her like a person. He won’t get anywhere if he’s constantly thinking of both of them one-dimensionally. Him as the dumb jock, and her as the smart Lang major,” you scoffed. “Sound familiar?”

“That’s a no on the study guide?”

“The Internet exists. And you didn’t get me by making me swoon over your knowledge of Breton lais.”

“True.” He clicked his tongue in the back of his mouth. “I’ll ask him if she has any chronic illnesses to tend to.”

“You didn’t stay with me during the Halloween party as some elaborate scheme to get me to date you. At that point, you still thought you were friendzoned. If my memory serves me.” You pointed out.

He yawned and nuzzled his cheek against your shoulder. “Perhaps…”

“You stayed with me because you’re a good, sweet guy, always have been,” you continued, taking your hand that he had been holding back to reach behind you and poke his leg. “That’s how you got me.”

“Aw, you still know how to my heart flutter, baby. Even after fifteen years.”

You smiled to yourself as he kissed your shoulder. “Yeah, you’re easy.”

“And still know how to wound me with so few words.”

“I love you, too, Channie,” you chuckled softly, taking his hand again under the covers.

“Only this easy for my girl.” He murmured, dropping another kiss to your shoulder. “Love of my life.” Another kiss, this one on your cheek. “Can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together.”

“We’re already married,” you said humorously, wiggling your entwined left hands pointedly.

“So? I can only talk about spending the rest of our lives together before we sign the marriage papers? Can’t do it while we’re actually living that life together and raising our son?”

“Well when you put it like that…” You turned your head to catch his lips with yours in a soft, sweet kiss.

Sungchan hummed into the kiss, pecking the corner of your mouth when you pulled away.

“I love you, my Sungchannie,” you professed as you’d done thousands of times before, each time thinking that you could never be more in love with this man than you were in that moment, and yet each time it felt like your love had only grown exponentially since the last time you said it.

“I love you too. My girl,” he replied, resting his forehead against yours. You didn’t need him to speak to know what he was thinking. The two of you were going to get through this. Even though right now, you don’t know exactly how, you would.

➠ series masterlist | blog masterlist

[babydollitzel]

Could you write dallas x female reader who has baby fever and maybe he teases her about it or get annoyed??? I just think it would be cute if dal was with someone who likes kids cause it would be so opposite of him! Tyyy and i love u and ur writing style!!

ᯓᡣ𐭩 Dallas Winston x fem!reader w baby fever

˗ˏˋ ꒰a/n꒱ ˎˊ˗ I haven’t posted in a month I’m just lazy but I’ll try getting back on track😣+ I love you too babes I love all yall💕anyways I don’t like how this came out I’m thinking abt making a cuter version or one with Dallas as a dad☝🏻

Dallas knew you were fond of children, especially babies with their little chubby cheeks and that soft baby scent. But recently you’re baby fever has been through the roof. Everytime you go shopping you can’t help but drift off to the baby section, going through all the cute clothes and toys. It made you wonder what a little baby with Dallas would look like, which is where this baby fever all started.

୨ৎ

It was a lazy Sunday afternoon, you and your boyfriend Dallas were laying in his bed. His thin blanket that smelled of cigarettes and cheap cologne was messily draped over you as he was leaned back against the headboard. You on the other hand couldn’t get this whole ‘baby’ idea of out your head, so you decided to speak up.

“Have you ever considered having kids?” You knew he didn’t like kids, and it was confirmed after you saw him chase two poor little kids as a, “joke”, but you still gave the question a try.

He let out a little scoff and ran a hand through his messy dark hair, almost as if he was surprised you didn’t already know the answer to that. "Kids? Me? Nah, man you know I ain't the type. They’re nothin’ but little brats…can’t stand ‘em.”He replied, lighting a cigarette and taking a deep drag.

You huffed at his answer, you should’ve known that’d be his answer, but you were still been hoping for something different. “C’mon you’re just focusing on the bad stuff, they’re not all brats you know.”

He took the cigarette out of his mouth to let out one of his ridiculous sounding laughs, “Oh yeah? Then what’s so good about them? Enlighten me.”

You almost rolled your eyes at his seemingly mocking tone but you took this as an opportunity to show him that babies weren’t just whiny little brats. “How don’t you see it? They’re adorable! They have the cutest pouty lips and just imagine what a baby of our own would look like! I’m sure you’d change your mind when you get to hold a baby of your own for the first time.” You said, hoping to change his mind about kids.

Dallas chuckled, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t entertained at how desperately you were trying to convince him. “Adorable? Yeah right..” He said, almost as if he was shrugging off everything you had just said. “And believe me, I ain’t ever holding no damn baby in my arms. No way..they’re too fragile.”

His last statement made you rethink the whole situation, it made you come to the conclusion that maybe he was just scared. You sat up. “I’m starting to think you’re just scared of the possibility, just saying” You said with a little shrug.

He raised a brow. He wasn’t expecting you to try and get all psychologists on him. “Scared? I ain’t scared of nothin’.”He said, a hint of defensiveness in his tone, as if he was moreover trying to convince himself more than you. It was just the thought of children, something that he’d always told himself he disliked, so of course he wouldn’t change his mind about them that quickly.

You smiled a little at his defensiveness but let it slide, you knew it was gonna take more than a couple words to convince him to have a baby with you later on in life, so you decided to just leave it at that. “Yeah whatever..we’re not done with this whole baby topic though” You were determined to have a mini combination of you and Dallas running around Buck’s place sometime in the future.

Dallas let out a soft scoff, “Don’t hold your breath, sweetheart.” He said with a little smirk. He knew that you weren’t gonna let this go, and honestly he found it amusing that you were so stubborn about it, even after he shot you down several times. But the thought of a mini you and him combined did have him curious.

[starrypen]

hello! i hope you're having a nice day 💕

also, i just fell in love w the way you write, and was wondering if i can request for an specific scenario!! you and jake are friends and have feelings for each other but no one confesses until you end up hooking up at a party 🤨 i thought abt this the whole day but i just know you're gonna write it better! please, and thank you 💗

⋇⊶⊰ BOUND TO HAPPEN ⊱⊷⋇

pairing: crush!jake x fem!reader

genre: smut

summary: a dull college party brings you and your crush closer than ever before. if you cum, you agree to be his girlfriend.

warnings: mentions of alcohol, pet names, oral (receiving), squirt, dom!jake, 2.3k words

a/n: thank u so much for your compliments and for your request <3 i don’t really go to parties so i’m not sure it’s tooooo realistic/accurate, im sorry!!

“i think i just saw jake and his friends walk up your driveway,” you frantically patted at your friends’ arms, waiting, rather impatiently, for one of them to admit that they invited him without telling you.

“it’s cool, y/n, i invited jay and you know that they can’t be separated,” raya’s hand found yours as she spoke. she gave it a tight squeeze before dropping it as three boys walked straight into her kitchen.

“hey, where’s the party at?” one of jay’s friends asked, placing a crate of beer onto the counter. “where is everyone?”

“i said 10,” raya replied, “but who actually arrives at 10?”

“true,” jay responded, continuing the conversation by asking about who he was expecting to see here.

you couldn’t make out any names, all your focus was on the boy to his right. jake. he gave you a friendly smile and a slight wave, one that beckoned you over to him. you grabbed a bottle of beer from the kitchen counter on your way over to him and extended it towards him. he took it with a “thank you,” before grabbing his keys from his jacket pocket and opening the cap. “how have you been? i haven’t seen you in so long,” he joked, knowing you’d shared a lecture together that morning.

“ugh so stressed, there’s this one guy in my class, he’s so annoying!” you snarked back, “jake, i think his name is.”

“nah, i heard he’s super smart and hot, a distraction if anything,” he took a swing of his beer. you mimicked, taking a sip of your drink too. “fuck, what is this shit, tastes rancid!” he pulls it away from his face to read the label, “0%, who brought alcohol free beer to a party?” his eyes landed on the friend of jay’s that had come in shouting, he clicked his tongue and muttered something under his breath. “i genuinely have no idea who that guy is, and i don’t think jay does either,” he laughed, whispering closely into your ear. your hand gripped his arm naturally as he spoke, you were barely able to concentrate on what he said, knowing he was so close to you right now.

“you seriously don’t know him?” you snapped your head around to get another look at the guy, “shouldn’t we like, tell him to leave?”

“nah, no point, looks like he’s already found someone to defend him,” he points over towards the guy again, whose tongue is down raya’s throat.

it’s midnight. the downstairs of raya’s house is full of people, mostly students from your college but some you don’t even recognise. over the last two hours, you realised that the guy who came in with jay and jake was actually the dj that raya had been sleeping with for the past month. he was loud and obnoxiously extroverted, and worst of all, pretty bad at djing.

a hand on the small of your back took you away from the conversation you were having with some people you knew from campus. “we’re playing truth or dare,” jay explained, guiding you to the kitchen, where, thankfully, the music was quieter.

“nah, not really for me,” you replied, turning back on yourself, when you noticed jake. “oh, are you playing?” you asked him, ready to change your mind.

“are you?” he asked back.

“no, she’s being boring!” jay answered for you, leaving you with nothing more to add than an awkward smile.

instead of barging back in on the conversation you were just having with your other friends, you headed to the bathroom upstairs. jake followed quietly. as you went to shut the door, jake slipped into the bathroom with you, only realising once he was actually in the room with you that you probably came in here to use the toilet.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t think this was the uh-” he stuttered his way through the sentence, trying to shut and cover his eyes for no reason.

“no it’s okay i didn’t come in here to,” you coughed in place of the word, “i’m just here to get away from that lot,” you pointed to the floor.

“honestly,” his hand scratched at the back of his head, “i’m kinda bored of this party.”

“me too,” you responded, a little too excitedly as if this was a groundbreaking opinion that you had in common. “shall we go to raya’s room and talk for a bit? or just sit on our phones without being pestered to play some stupid drinking game?”

“yeah, i actually need to tell you something anyway,” he agreed with a shy smile, shuffling into the smallest space possible to let you unlock the door and lead the way, “she won’t mind, right?”

“no, she’s cool with whatever,” you shrug, twisting the door handle and walking into the disaster she calls a room. “don’t mind the mess, 3 girls had to get changed in here earlier!” you explain, as if he’d understand. you propped yourself against her headboard and threw all of the random clothes into the floor. you scurried your feet under the blanket folded at the end of her bed. he joined you after taking off his jacket, resting his head on her pillow, his hands clasped together on his torso. “what did you need to tell me?” you rolled onto your side, your hand sandwiched between your cheek and a pillow.

“oh,” he rolled over to face you, “that guy, leo, he’s the dj.”

your heart sank as he told you, you were kind of hoping for more, and it was definitely clear on your face.

“and also that you look pretty tonight,” he smiled, his hand at your hip, “you always look pretty in fact, i think about how pretty you are all the time.”

you hide your face by burying it into the pillow, “i thought those beers were 0%?”

“i’m being serious y/n,” he clarifies.

you look back at him again. his eyes are filled with sincerity, but it’s hard for you to remain focused on them when your eyes keep falling to his lips. you reassured yourself that it was okay, his eyes were doing the same.

“can i kiss you?” he asks, taking his hand from your hip in favour of tucking a strand of your straightened hair behind your ear.

as he leaned closer, you felt his thumb graze over your lobe a few times. “please,” you whispered.

it seemed to take forever for your lips to finally come together, but when they did, it was everything you’d imagined it to be. he took your bottom lip between his own, enclosing his lips around it more harshly with each kiss. it wasn’t long before your tongues vied to enter the other’s mouth. in the meantime, jake had managed to steady himself on his elbow, soon on top of you, between your legs. you were experienced enough to know exactly where this was going, but that wasn’t what you wanted from this, so you pulled away for a moment.

“jake,” you started, snapping him out of the trance you’d put him in, “i really like you, you know that right?” your hands squeezed as his upper arms.

he melted under your touch. “i do now,” he laughed, “and i really like you too, don’t worry.”

“so, i don’t want this to just be,” you motioned to either side of you both, “just whatever this is.”

“it’s not,” he chuckled before leaning in to give you a small gentle kiss on your lips. another shortly followed, and then a longer one at the corner of your mouth. you played with his hair between your fingers. “baby, you’re already mine,” he commented, kissing your collarbone while tugging at the chest area of your shirt that showed a lot of cleavage. you managed to drop the straps of the top, shaking them off of your arms as jake eagerly tugged at your shirt some more, leaving it be at the middle of your tummy. his kisses trailed over your chest, down to the button on your jeans. “you’re so fucking gorgeous,” he kneels between your legs as he tussles with the denim waistband of his own jeans while you do the same. you undo yours before him and wait for him to take them off for you, which he does along with your panties before even doing his own.

it’s almost as if he forgets to take off his jeans, as he shuffles down the bed with his thumb slowly circling your clit. he replaces his thumb with his plump lips, pressing a small, light kiss against it while your legs try to close in on him. he pulls away, his middle finger lapping your pussy before he gently pushes it in. “if i make you cum tonight, will you be my girlfriend?” his smile is cheeky, but you know jake well enough to know that it’s genuine.

your lips struggle to stay shut as you nod, trying your hardest not to moan under his touch already.

his head ducks again, “good,” he smiles against your clit. his tongue fights the hood of your clit, easily finding the most sensitive part of your body in a matter of seconds. your hand pushes his head further onto you as his tongue works your clit and his fingers curl inside you. you’re not sure when he added another finger, but you’re enjoying it too much to care.

“fuck, jake,” your legs close a little more around his head as you feel a trickle, or maybe a stream, of water run out of you.

“did you just squirt for me, baby?” he looks up at you while biting his lower lip.

“i think,” you laugh awkwardly, “i’ve never done that before!”

“fuck that’s so hot,” his fingers curl inside you one last time before he pulls them out. they’re dripping wet, as you expected. “suck on them princess, make them clean,” he commands. you take the two fingers into your mouth, swirling your tongue around them and trying to take more of their length as you would his cock. while you’re sucking on his fingers, jake manages to unbutton his pants to reveal his dick. he pumps it in his hands a few times while removing his jeans before tapping it against your clit.

“do you,” you pause as he hits it against your clit one more time, causing you to shake in pleasure, “do you have a condom?”

he scrambles off the bed, reaching inside his jacket pocket which he threw to the ground and pulling out a small silver tin filled with condoms. he singled one out and opened it up, rolling it onto his dick with the most adorable concentration face. he climbs back into the bed, his hands coming to your sides to flip you over and help you onto all fours in front of him. you back up, your ass against his hard dick, which is enough for jake to know you want it just as much as he does.

with his hand at the base of his cock, he pushes it into you gently, letting you take it all and get used to his girth.

“should i move?” he asks, almost as if he feels guilty for his size.

you hum, it’s the only thing you can do while he’s inside of you, you realise.

he pulls his dick out and pushes it back in again, soon building up to a pace that suits you both. his hand has found your hair, he’s bunched it together and pulled it all back, using it to keep his balance as he fucks you. you help him keep his rhythm, throwing your ass back against him until he stops abruptly.

“turn over, baby, i miss that beautiful face of yours,” he taps your ass as he pulls out of you. a little short of breath, he relaxes back against his heels while you turn over. your hand finds your clit, rubbing it for him to watch. “is that how you like it?” he asks, mentally taking notes. he takes your hand away and places it near to your face, as if he’s asking you to suck on your fingers. he gets to his knees once again and lines himself up with your pussy. his dick misses a few times, which makes him a little mad at himself. you think it’s cute. he finally gets it in with a groan, “shit, you feel so good,” he compliments, leaning on his hand above your head. his lips find your forehead. he places a gentle kiss against it while whispering, “you look so good under me,” before allowing himself to sit upright again. his pace matches the pace he set before, but this time he added rubbing your clit into the equation, just as you showed him only moments ago.

“jake,” your hand rested on his chest while the other gripped at the sheet beneath you, “i’m cumming,” you moaned and winced, your pussy throbbing around him. you felt so vulnerable in that moment, but you knew you were safe with jake.

“you’re such a good girl,” his came close to your face again, taking your lips between his own and then pulling away as the pulsating became less intense around his dick. he began to fuck you again, but a lot sloppier and with more groans than before. he soon pulled out, pulling off the condom and wobbling and kneeling to the side of you in urgency before spraying your tits with his cum. you took your finger to your chest, scraping up what you could before dripping it into your mouth and sucking the rest off your fingers. jake pulled up his boxers and ran to the bathroom you were in earlier that night to grab a towel, the bathroom bin going with a loud clang as he disposed of the condom. he came back and patted your chest with the towel, your face too, all while laughing to himself.

“what’s funny?” you asked, searching for your own underwear with your hand.

“nothing,” he carried on, chuckling away, “you’re just really cute.” you smiled to yourself, sorting out your rolled up shirt with your other hand to cover your chest again. jake tried to help, but unfortunately the only time he can keep his lips off of yours is to kiss your neck, or mumble against it. “even cuter now that you're my girlfriend.”

“guys, why are you in my-” raya covers her eyes as soon as she notices jake is only in his boxers, “not my best sheets, y/n,” she comments with a cry, before shutting the door, leaving the pair of you to laugh about almost getting caught.

[ddejavvu]

OMG CONGRATS on 20K!!! You truly really deserve it Mei :) Been here for just under a year I think? And you’re always exceptional <3

Would you be up for 'it's finger lickin' good.' A plot line with Eddie Munson x reader! Maybe you’re at a party with him Robin Steve Nancy the gang ya know! And Eddie has a whole thing about biting you. He looooves biting you. It’s a love language to him, and it makes him feel so happy. So at Steve’s party with a bit of drinking, Eddie’s not adding to the convo at all he’s just biting you.

Until Robin makes what’s supposed to be a snarky comment about how it’s so weird. Usually Eddie doesn’t care abt being called that. But it’s Robin, who he thought was his fellow weirdo, and he’s a little tipsy, and for some reason this time it just hits him. But you can’t stand to see your boy sad. And you definitely don’t want him to stop biting you. So not only do you dramatically steal the room in a way that makes Eddie proud, and make out with him egregiously in front of everyone. But you come back from a room and Eddie is beaming literally jumping up and down in place he’s so giddy, as he walks out covered in bite marks and hickeys galore

join my 20K celebration!

'it's finger lickin' good.' - send me a request for a baby blurb! give me a character, and a plotline, and i'll write you a little fanfiction :)

so i wasn't able to write all of that because these are supposed to be baby blurbs but i hope that this is sufficient!

--

Any tears that might have been glossed over Eddie's eyes a moment before are gone, replaced with what you're sure are a thousand little twinkling stars as you kiss at his exposed bicep. He's elected to wear a cut up band tee, one that he's butchered so much that the sleeves are twice the size of the neckline, and it gives you plenty of access to his pale side, as well.

"It's not weird," You huff, nose against his milky skin as you travel up his shoulder. He turns his face to meet you in a kiss, one that you eagerly take control of, straddling his lap where he's perched on the twin bed in the corner.

You knock him back against the wall, but you stuff your fingers behind his head so that they take the brunt of the collision. It smarts, but it's worth it.

"Or- or maybe it is weird," You consider, nipping at his lip and trailing down his jaw, "But I don't care. I like it, so weird isn't a bad thing. And- god, I understand why you do this," You breathe, lips swollen as you use them to suck at Eddie's neck, "This is amazing. I just wanna- like, chew on you."

"It feels- ah! It feels good," He groans, head now lulled back comfortable against the wall, "I- You- rightthere! You're like a vampire, babe."

"There," You mumble, nipping at the curve of his jaw, then suckling at the red, raw skin, "And there," then just below his ear, "And- and there."

"Okay," You pant, when he's sufficiently littered with teeth marks and bruises galore, "Let's go rub it in her face, babe."

"I think we already did," He laughs, "Remember when you scaled me like a ladder and made out with me in front of a crowd of people?"

There's a slight flush of heat to your cheeks at the memory, because you're not usually that bold. But you'd done it for Eddie, and clearly it had worked if the breathless grin on his face is any indication.

"Right. Well, let's go rub it even more in her face," You decide, tugging him towards the door, "Come on! She can tease you all she wants, but at the end of the day, you're the one with the girlfriend."

[spacedlexi]

I’ve been thinking abt this recently, relating to Violet’s arc when you don’t save her, and wanted to see thoughts as you posted about her relationship with Minerva.

I don’t think it’s crazy for me to headcanon that in 403 when the bomb explodes, Minerva actually abandons Violet prior to it occurring (maybe being drawn by AJ’s gunshot depending on your choice??), because it makes absolutely no sense for them to go “stop the bomb” and then only one of them is burnt to shit. An explosion from such a close distance would’ve logically left both of them at least mildly burnt.

It makes more sense for Minerva to be totally fine in the kidnapped Louis route, but in the Violet route, I can’t help but feel like Violet saying “Where’s Minnie?” with such frustration when she shows up on the beach is due to something occurring.

But knowing Skybound and Telltale, they probably just forgot how explosions work.

LMAO 💀 at that last sentence BUT YES i do at least agree that something had to have happened between them during the explosion but its been hard to figure out exactly what that couldve been 🤔

but jokes aside lets try to give the writers some credit. if vi was so horribly scarred WHY wasnt minnie harmed as well if they were supposedly together? i think its a fair question to ask. especially since in 404 minnie and vi are completely separated with minnie already on the beach and vi struggling to get to shore by herself (burned and blinded 😭). and her "WHERE IS SHE??" does sound pretty furious (and atp she regrets what she did on the boat and tries to apologize to clem a minute later so why would her anger be directed at clem and louis?). we know minnie sacrificed sophie to save herself so why would it be so hard to believe she did the same to vi in the explosion? or did vi possibly try to protect her? or both?? minnie lets vi take the brunt of the hit for her and then leaves her?? i cant imagine minnie giving up on trying to stop the bomb either since shes delta now and definitely wouldnt want the boat to explode. and youd think minnie would be leading the way since kidnapped vi was in a cell the whole time. vi says they headed to the boiler room together to try to stop it but then it seems like everything just kinda went black 💣💥

but if minnie didnt abandon vi before the explosion, why wasnt minnie near vi in the water post-explosion? minnie had to have left vi alone and vulnerable at some point in all of this and we know how vi feels about being abandoned... minnie is more focused on trying to save the remaining delta and doesnt seem to have even tried looking for vi if they Were separated by the blast (and if they were together when the bomb went off (which vi says they were) minnie wouldve known vi was caught in the blast, but it doesnt seem like she cares)

violet being violet i do think shes still also worried about minnie on some level because her whole thing is being the "protector" of the group and her feelings towards minnie are (as she later admits) Very messed up atm (shes always just wanted to save her). where saved violet recognizes minnie has chosen the delta in 403, i think here on the beach is where kidnapped vi is forced to accept it, and she realizes who it is she can Truly rely on instead

[snaillock]

ok so there’s been a lot stuff going on today with multiple writers on here including myself finding out that our works have been reposted on wattpad without ANY of our permission. despite this specific account doing this for over a year by now, basically nobody was even aware of it until today.

there’s a bunch of things wrong about doing this but one specific thing this person said to justify it really ticked me off.

this is a really shitty excuse for taking the MULTIPLE works from writers to a whole different app where most of them aren’t even on.

the main point i wanted to make for this post is that if you want to have a place to store all the fics you like, the reblog function is such an easy way to do it. all you have do make a side blog (optional and very easy), reblog whatever you like, and add tags to make it easy to find again. it’s so simple and it benefits EVERYONE involved especially the writers.

artists and writers on this site have been saying this FOREVER, over and over again.

personally i LOVE it when people reblog my fics and add their own tags especially if it’s thoughts and commentary on what they had read. it’s highly motivating and it makes me feel like there’s actual community on here. doing this can really make a writer’s day.

this person also mentioned that going through their own likes is a basically a whiplash going from fluff to smut. the thing is… there’s already a solution for that. taggingggggg!!!! if you want fluff then reblog those fics with fluff tags. if you want smut, then reblog those fics with smut tags. etc. etc. etc. it ain’t that difficult.

for the offline reading part, that’s so fucking silly man i can’t. bro honestly i would’ve much rather preferred if this person copied and pasted my fics onto a private note or document for their own personal enjoyment. but noooo they had to copy me and other people’s entire stories PUBLICLY without even making sure that it was alright to do.

anyways to wrap this up, the account name is ohmyjung. unfortunately i don’t think there’s really a way to report them for this since it seems like wattpad really care more abt stealing from published works. so the best we can do right now is hope that this person takes everything down (even if apparently they’re blocking writers for confronting them????)

update: the evil has been rid of. round of applause for everyone’s hard work. my point still stands though. if you want to genuinely show appreciation a really good fan fiction you have read, then throw in a quick reblog. it means a lot

[starrylayle]

My fave marauders ships and dynamics as a multi-shipper !! Ok so, there are certain ships I like to imagine as canon in the canon universe, and there are other ships that I prefer in aus and such but still ship them so much!! So I thought I’d just ramble abt them here lol.

My fave ships that are canon/I think I should be endgame:

First off, Jily ofc. My loves. I’m generally not super excited abt str8 couples but they’re just too cute. My fave dynamic with them is that they’re academic rivals — well at least lily thinks they are, James is just hopelessly in love with her and enjoys competition lol. Lily thinks he’s an idiot, immature and a bit of a bully at first but slowly warms up to him as she sees his kind-heartedness and stance on justice. Plus, she’s always found him a little hot :)

Wolfstar, duh. I don’t think I have to go into detail coz I already do so much on my blog lol.

Dorlene — aaah I love my tragic, angsty lil lesbians. Sucker for the quidditch-rivals-to-lovers trope. Ooh and i headcanon Dorcas as transfem. But yeah if you’ve read ‘the hands that feeds’ by rollercoasterwords that’s basically how I see their dynamic.

Fralice — cuties and did not deserve the ending they got ;((

Rosekiller — ok, ok. I know I’ve ranted abt how I don’t like the fanonization of their characters in fandom,, but I will admit I do like them together. Especially when they’re depicted as the awful people they are lol. I like to think that they’re still hooking up in GoF on nights where barty’s poly juice wears off lmaoo. Also random but I hc Barty to be in ravenclaw.

Pandora x Xenophillius (idk how to spell his name) — I like to imagine Pandora as a goth who runs an underground magical weed business and Xeno as a hippie weirdo and conspiracy theorist. Both are bi/pan tho and have def hooked up with ppl of the same gender before.

Andromeda x Ted Tonks — iconic. Love them. Andy was the og rebellious black family child.

Emmary — love, love this ship. For context, I picture Emmaline as a little older than Mary (maybe 2 or 3 years) and they meet when Em’s at the order. Mary’s a bisexual girlie who’s predominantly been with men at this point, and Em’s a big Butch lesbian who loves Mary so much but isn’t sure if Mary likes her back, at first. Ofc they end up together after the first war but when Em wants to join the second war, Mary oblivates herself and retreats to the muggle world entirely because she cannot bear more pain.

My fave ships that I like to think are semi-canon, as in their unrequited, or right person wrong time, or both have feelings that the other doesn’t know — they just don’t workout for some reason:

First off, Marylene — my absolute fave, right person, wrong time ship. Love the whole, ‘Marlene loved her too early, Mary loved her too late idea’. I’m a sucker for best friends to lovers ahhh. I imagine that Marls had crush on Mary since they were eleven and came out to her later, and although Mary was supportive she didn’t like her back at that point. Then Marls got with Dorcas and maybe Mary got a tad bit jealous. And then Marlene was killed ofc so Mary moved on and went with Emmaline, but she never really stopped loving Marlene.

Nobleflower — bi narcissa and Alice rights!! I like to think that they had a bit of a homoerotic friendship back in their hogwarts years, but the fact that they were on opposite sides eventually pulled them apart. And so Alice gets with Frank and Narcissa with Malfoy. Aaah so tragic I love them

Lily x Remus — I like to think Lily had a little crush on Remus when they were younger but she got over it and they became besties !!

Bellatrix / Lady Zabini — Toxic murder comphet lesbians!! Tho I imagine they ‘broke up’ their fling coz Bellatrix was murdering with pure blood fascism in mind,,, and lady Zabini was just like,, why can’t we just kill ppl for the sake of killing them?? 🥺🥺

Jegulus — ok so I don’t like jegulus as a canon(ish) ship, buuut I love me some unrequited jegulus, specifically from Regulus’ side coz sorry I just personally don’t see James ever liking Reg in canon. I imagine Reg goes into hogwarts wanting to hate the guy who stole his brother but ends up falling for him just the same. He has internalised homophobia and hates the fact that he’s gay, esp for someone like James lol.

Bartylus — My hc is that neither of them liked each other romantically, but they settled and got off each other to pass time. It’s transactional, at least it’s starts off being..maybe barty’s a little more into it than reg thinks they are.

Peter/Bertha Jorkins — I like to imagine they dated for awhile during hogwarts — until Bertha got bored of him and dumped him. Peter never really got over it and was still bitter.

Peter/Sybil — oooh I remember this one was trending on marauders tik tok awhile back but I’m still not over it. Happens after Bertha/Peter. Sybil breaks up with Peter maybe coz she gets a prophecy that he becomes evil. Peter is confused and heartbroken.

Snily — ok hear me out!! I don’t care for their portrayals in a lot of fics coz I think the pro / anti Snape bias is always there — but I would be open to exploring the complexity of their dynamic in a fic when snapes actions aren’t justified or excused, but he’s not portrayed as a one dimensional bad guy. And I think it would be interesting to explore more of Lily’s character and why she stuck by him so long.

Ok, now onto ships that I only enjoy in aus:

Marylily/macevans — by far my fave ship in aus. Best friends to lovers >>>> also half the marauders edits saved on my phone are marylily edits lmaoo they’re just so cute!!

Jegulus — requited this time!! If it’s an au and James is not reduced to a generic sunshine people pleasing character, then they’re a little cute I’ll admit. Not the biggest fan of the 'best friend's brother' trope but the drama is entertaining at least.

Mary/Dorcas — I don’t think they’re a very popular on here but I personally like it. In a way they’re opposites but they’re motivations are a lot more similar than they realise.

Pandalily — so, so cute. Fanart is spectacular

Dorlily — so academic rivals to lovers coded

Prongsfoot — specifically in aus where James and Sirius are on opposing sides, for example, slytherin!Sirius au

Wolfstarbucks — James and sirius share everything!! Including their lovers apparently. Mostly enjoy it as a crack ship tho.

Well this was fun!! I love multi-shipping <33

[lunatic4toji]

YALL SAW TOJI IN THE NEW TRAILER???

his va is the same as dio’s i’m going insane

made me think some thoughts abt my man…….. minors dni

cw: dbf!toji x f!reader, tried adding some plot so it wasn’t straight up porn but i don’t like it, age gap (reader early 20’s, toji late 30’s/early 40’s), unprotected sex (wrap it irl), pet names (sweetheart, baby, princess, pretty girl), praise, fingering, vaginal sex, size difference, creampie, abrupt ending because i said so, this is definitely ooc toji but i don’t care it’s my smut my toji.

your dad was having another barbecue with his work friends today. you always hated them when you were younger, but it’s your first one since you’ve graduated high school, and you’re on spring break from college, so you’re kind of excited. your dad has been talking about how everyone was excited to see you because you were always so nice to everyone and they’ve missed you.

day of the bbq, you wake up, take a shower, and put on a tank top and some shorts. you don’t bother with hair or makeup because you’ve known these guys your whole life, so what do they care? right? wrong. the second you walk outside to say hi to everyone, your breath hitches in your throat when you see a man you couldn’t even conjure in your dreams. you certainly would’ve remembered him. even in the spring heat, he’s wearing a black compression shirt and grey sweats. his scar going down his lips moving as he talks is becoming increasingly attractive. he glances at you when you walk past and raises his beer bottle to say hi, then goes back to talking to your father. you continue around the porch saying hi to your dad’s friends, but you hesitate walking over to the grill where your dad and the beautiful mystery man are.

“hey, kiddo!” your dad says, and you say hey back and nervously look over at the man standing beside him. “oh, hell, where are my manners?” he says, his black hair glistening in the sun. “i’m toji. i don’t believe we’ve met before, but i might as well have from all i’ve heard about you from your dad and everyone else here.” toji. toji. you were already thinking about how you’d moan his name. once toji finished his introduction, you introduced yourself to him and your dad left the grill to check out what the other guys were doing and left you alone with toji. “they said you were a cute little thing, but i wasn’t expecting all this.” he looks down at you, and you somehow keep your composure and say, “my dad didn’t say much about you either.” you wanted to go on about how much you wanted him to take you inside and fuck you right now, but you could save those comments for after everyone left. toji downs the rest of his beer, and while he does so you can’t help but stare at his jaw, his neck, his adam’s apple, his veins. oh how much you wanted to bite him. he throws his bottle in the trash can beside the grill, which snaps you out of your trance. “i’m going inside, sweetheart. catch ya later.”

it wasn’t until now you realized just how many people were here. you couldn’t find toji the rest of the day (4 long party hours) and you thought you had gone so long without romantic or sexual interaction that you thought you made him up entirely. you went to sleep dreaming about him and all the things you wanted, no, needed him to do to you. that was until you woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. you were only in a t-shirt and underwear, because that’s what you normally sleep in when you’re home. you walk into the kitchen, turn on the faucet, fill a glass with water, and take a few sips before peeking in the living room. no fucking way. he’s just sitting in the couch and watching football like he doesn’t know what all he did to you in the few minutes you were together. you faintly choke on your water but recover quickly. toji looks over, confused, but his face rests into a soft smile when he sees it’s you.

he says “hey, you,” and beckons you over to him with two fingers. i know a better place for those. you smile back, sit your glass on the table, walk to the couch, and sit down beside him. “i was just thinking ’bout ya. how pretty you looked earlier.” you can’t do anything but smile. you’ve never felt like this over a small compliment, especially not one of your dad’s friends. well, none of dad’s friends are ever this hot. “what’s got you all shy, pretty thing? haven’t said a word to me since ya sat down. somethin’ wrong?” he looks over at you. “uh, no, just.. uh,” fuck. this is the worst time to trip up on words. he looks at you, worried. “uh, what? you alright?” you smile at him, “yeah, it’s just i’m not used to seeing a guy in my living room when i go to get some water.” toji chuckles and you wish you could take a picture of his smile right now, his face illuminated in the glow of the tv. “that’s fair, sweetheart.” he sits his cup on the coffee table and turns to you.

“i meant what i said. about you being pretty and all.” you smile again at the compliment. he could say it a million times and it would never get old. “you, uh,” you both laugh before you can finish your sentence. “you think i’m pretty too, huh?” you laugh again, and say, “yeah, i do. very.” the room gets quiet and toji looks at your lips then his eyes meet yours. all in one second, he grabs your hips, places you on his lap, and kisses you. finally. you just notice how you’re absolutely drenched when you feel toji’s tongue trying to pry into your mouth. you let him in and deepen the kiss. he pulls away and you whine. “shit, sweetheart. should we.. be doin’ this sorta thing?” you look at him with needy eyes. “probably not, but we’ve already started, so it’d be no good to stop now.” he smiles and kisses you again. you feel the grip of his hands on your hips tighten, and you realize he’s trying to feel you on his bulge. you allow him to move you, and he groans into your mouth when he feels how wet you are through your underwear. “good god, baby. gotta feel you, please.” you quickly nod, and he takes your shirt off while you fumble with the hem of his sweatpants. “we’ll get to that in a second, baby. wanna mark you a little first, yeah?” you nod again. “good girl, sweetheart.” you feel your clit throb against his bulge and grind down a little. toji groans against the skin where he’s leaving marks on your stomach, and you moan softly with him.

“shit, only made a few marks on ya, but we can get back to that later. gotta feel you now.” you take off his shirt while he deals with his pants, but keeps his boxers for now. he slides his hand between your thighs and toys with your clit through the fabric of your soaked underwear. “gotta prep you a bit, baby.” “no. need all of you now, please toji.” he takes a deep breath and considers it for a second, thinking about how hard he is under you right now. but he doesn’t want to hurt you. “i know, sweetheart. but i can’t just yet. let me fuck you with my fingers first, yeah?” you look at him and reluctantly nod, because you want his cock and not his fingers right now. but this’ll do. he hooks his fingers onto the side of your underwear and plunges them into your wet heat. you both hiss at the contact. he starts with his middle finger, going slow while he rubs your clit with his thumb. “so tight, baby, fuck. doin’ so good for me.” his praise makes you clench around his finger tighter, and he smiles. “you like that? like when i tell you how good you feel?” you moan, and toji adds his ring finger and speeds up his assault on your clit. you bend your head down and start kissing and biting his neck. he groans and grabs the back of your head with his free hand. he grabs a fistful of your hair and pulls you to his face and kisses you deeply. you start fucking yourself on his fingers and he focuses on your clit, wanting to make you cum sooner rather than later so he can fuck you. “love the way you sound, princess. want you to cum for me.” he’s fucking you with his fingers at what feels like the speed of sound, and it’s all too much. he keeps praising you because he knows you like it, “good girl. cum for me, princess, so i can feel you how we both need.” your eyes roll back and as much as he hates to do it he clasps his hand over your mouth while you cum, to make sure you don’t wake anyone upstairs. “gotta be quiet for me, baby. i wanna hear you, but you can’t be loud, okay?” you nod. “you all right, sweetheart? breathe, just relax. did so good f’me.” he pulls his fingers out of you and licks them clean. this makes you impossibly wetter. “mm, tastes so good. you gotta taste too.” your mind is still foggy so you do whatever he tells you. he brings his soaked fingers to your lips and you take them in, swirling your tongue around his digits. “shit, if i didn’t need to fuck ya so bad i’d have ya suck it.” you laugh and look down at it cock restrained in his boxers. you know you wouldn’t be able to take it all in your mouth, much less in your pussy.

toji catches you staring and brings his hand to your chin to tilt your face back up to him. “you sure you’re okay, sweetheart?” “yeah, just.. i don’t think it’ll fit.” his mouth forms a small smile at your comment. “we’ll make it fit. don’t worry.” he pecks your lips. with that, you do still worry. sure, you’ve fucked guys with girth before, but none like this. you’re still eager to get him inside you. “i’m ready.” “good girl.” you tilt back a little so he can free his cock. the angry red tip is leaking pre and you notice it has been for a while based on the wet spot on his boxers. he’s beautiful everywhere. you go to slide off toji’s lap to take off your underwear when he grabs your hips and rips them off himself. “hey!” “sorry baby, can’t wait any longer. i’ll buy you as many more as you want.” with his formidable strength, he grabs your hips again and hovers you over his cock. you grab on to his shoulders and he lets go. you look at him, puzzled. “you’re a big girl, right, princess? wanna watch you fuck me.” he laces his fingers and puts his hands behind his head. you whine at him, “toji, ‘s not gonna fit, you gotta help.” he clicks his teeth at you. “no, no. you can do it. know ya can.” you whimper at him because you need him to guide you down his cock, but you’re throbbing so bad you try yourself. you slowly start to sink down onto him and he’s just so thick. toji throws his head back in pleasure and you cover your mouth so your moans don’t wake up your parents directly upstairs to you both. “s-shit, baby,” he groans, “feel so fuckin’ good.” he takes his hands out from behind his head and grabs your face. “i can’t get over how beautiful you are, sweetheart. so beautiful- fuck, and so tight.” you make a small noise at him and he kisses you again. “my pretty girl, yeah?” “y-yes toji, ‘m your pretty girl.” he puts his hands back onto your hips and guides you up and down his cock. it stretches you out so good, you wanna stay like this forever.

“then you can take more f’me, can’t ya?” “w-wha-“ is all you can get out before he puts one of his hands over your mouth and slams you down on his cock with his other hand. you scream, out of pain and pleasure, but it’s muffled due to his hand. “j-jesus fuck, need both hands, baby. can ya be quiet?” you nod, and he takes his hand away and you quickly replace it with biting down on his shoulder. toji starts to fuck up into you simultaneously while slamming you onto him. you feel warm tears go down your cheeks from how good and how full you feel. if you two were alone, you’d both be moaning like pornstars. but, due to the situation, toji settles with you biting him and he breathes heavily into your hair, occasionally letting out a groan when you clench around him. “not gonna last much l-longer, princess. where do ya want me?” you’re not on birth control and he’s clearly not wearing a condom, but you’ve never wanted someone to cum inside you so bad in your life. “inside, fuck, please toji, please,” he lets out a small grunt and says, “you sure? don’t wanna- mfh- get ya knocked up or anythin’.” “‘s okay toji, i don’t care. please, just-“ you bite down onto him to control your noises again. you feel your release creeping up on you, but you pay it no mind. you only care about him. “feels s’good toji, pleasepleaseplease-“ “alright, alright baby. insi- fuck, inside it is. want’cha to cum first though sweetheart. s’the least i can do.” he picks up his pace rocking your hips back and forth and you feel your clit rubbing deliciously on his pelvis. you’re so close, if he could just- “cum for me, princess. i gotcha, c’mon, been doin’ so good for me all night.” you come undone instantly, and feeling your walls close around him sends him directly behind you, almost at the same time. “good girl, baby. so, so good. fuck-“ you feel him fill you up, so warm and so much. you’re glad the couch is leather so it won’t stain, because some is definitely falling out under you. toji kisses you again, hungrily but lovingly as you both come down.

“we gotta do this again.”

[tojikai]

Okay I finally finished all of your stories!

Permanent mark is officially my favorite:,)

Thoughts;

See at one point, i was like let y/n heal and have them get together afterwards but then i was like “damn he fucked rie for two months 💔😔😟” and idk but something about her’s and suguru’s relationship is so tragic to me, i so badly wanted them together somehowReader should’ve gotten with suguru! I wanted their endgame so badly 😭💕 Everyone feels bad for satoru but nope i mostly feel bad for y/n and suguru, I wish they would’ve gotten together first, I don’t hate y/n either her, I saw some people hating on her and while i disagree on her sleeping with satoru while he has a gf, i can’t find myself to dislike her, and she actually might be my favorite “y/n” of yours.

both sundered and permanent mark satoru’s are so confusing and make me sigh deeply

Questions I have regarding the story surprisingly 😅:

- What was satoru whole thought process during the breakup and cheating

- Did he still love y/n at that point

- What was his reasoning

- Did he think abt y/n while rie/regret or like want her?

- Why did he put her over y/n??

- Basically what’s up with the whole situation

- Did he ever love y/n over her? Why would he break up with y/n over her?

- Did he love or want her more? Regarding rie

- Did y/n not make him happy anymore, what happened?

- Was there problems in their rs?

Note:

Thank you in advance if you answer, i probably already said this but your stories were a delight to read<33

I can’t wait to read the future stories you might have in store for us if you do:3

its nice that some people try to understand pm!yn and her actions. I also think it's understandable that many are frustrated about what she did. most of the characters in pm are driven by strong emotions that they made bad decisions, i could say its the theme of the whole story. they can be very confusing since not everything's mentioned explicitly, which i deliberately did bc i like that readers have to absorb something in order of them to really understand it. im happy you enjoyed pm !! 1. tbh satoru's mind was a mess the whole time, he hated himself for cheating on yn. at one point he felt like the breakup was meant to happen so he could finally be w rie but w rie he felt like something's wrong, almost as if he's still considering yn in everything he does in his new rs. he reached a point where he doesn't know if it's really what he wants or if he's just doing it bc it's already there. hearing abt suguru and yn shook him into clarity lmao

2. he still loves yn even when he was w rie.

3. like reason for going w rie? he thought thats what he wanted. he felt like it would complete something he never got to finish, but being away from yn took a bigger part of him than he thought it would.

4. he's always thinking abt yn even when he was w rie. he thought its just bc he felt guilty for cheating. but it was more than that. while he felt right being w rie, it's just different w yn. nothing feels wrong w yn whilst w rie, there's always a feeling that he's not really into it.

5. bc he thought that it was the right thing to do since he became rie's bf. satory appreciated her a lot when she stood w him even when everyone's judging them. he felt like she risked everything just to be w him and so he wanted to put out something equal.

6. lmao idk how to answer this but yeah ik, it's messy.

7. nobody asked satoru directly but if someone did, he'd be admitting to himself that he loves yn more than rie even when he and the latter were in a rs. he broke up w yn bc 1.) he already cheated, 2.) he thought he wanted to be w rie. 3.) bc he didn't think things through.

8. he loved rie. just not the way he loves yn and not as much.

9. he's the happiest w yn. he didn't realize it immediately when he left bc his and rie's rs was still young and it was still honeymoon phase and cloud9. after that, he had questions and lingering thoughts and feelings that he chose to push aside until he snapped (hearing abt sugu and yn)

10. no, there are no problems in their rs. that's why yn crashed out.

that's all !! thank you so much for the kind words and support ~!! <33

[ev1llesb1an]

Documentation of my comphet throughout the years 🧍‍♀️

Okay so I thought it’d be funny to talk abt my most intense male fixation eras as a lesbian (idk i’m just shitposting into the void again) judge me all u want (it is probably needed) but i need ppl to understand the real me 🙏

IT CROPPED HALF HIS FACE OUT but i just realised if you aren’t british ur gonna have no idea who he is anyone (he’s lachlan white from emmerdale) omg this was an ERA everyone around me thought i was going insane (i was) but like they just didn’t get it he slayed so hard at a level that will never be reached (literally) also tom atkinson on sex education was like a full circle moment for me omg but anyways i was like 11-12 here these were literally my formative years this changed me FOREVER don’t judge he slayed omg

THIS okay so u can’t even blame me for this one it’s just correct. yes he’s like walking masculinity stereotype BUT he also had depth and was interesting 😌 the fanfics were SO GOOD this is when i really got into fanfiction and accidentally read smut where someone get pregnant in the hunger games 🧍‍♀️i read this one fic that was like x reader AND THEY STRAIGHT UP BOTH DIED but anyways. i read fanfics abt literally everyone thg character (read abt women and convinced myself i was still straight lmfao) but he was the stand out for me. i recently revisited this era and the fics ppl write on ao3 r INSANE omg like what is wrong with u ppl ( i say this lovingly but also wtf )

OMGOMGOMG BEST ERA OF MY LIFE u actually don’t understand u just had to be there. a solid percentage of my brain even to this day is made up of this man. this is like the stupidest thing ever but when i was like 14 i would just mirror his personality (and tone down the arsehole part obvs) so that i could get more talkative AND IT ACTUALLY WORKED nobody in the whole world will ever understand how much he means to me (i don’t rly understand it myself tbh) and ik ppl literally fuckinf despise him but i will not tolerate the dandy mott slander bc he is literally part of my core identity atp i revisit him every few months just to fully reconnect with my inner being. did anyone read Companion? that shit was crazy also i wrote a fic abt him on wattpad and people actually READ IT so anyways best era of my life it truly never got better i rly hit me peak (i had 0 friends) the few friends i had literally told me i talked abt him too much and it made them like me less 💀

this was arguably my most chill era like yea i was pretty obsessive but with marvel it’s so normalised to be so intense abt everything i kinda just fit right in. there’s too much professor fanfiction r u ppl okay 🧍‍♀️ also more actor fanfiction than i have ever seen for any other man in my LIFE but the capitalism went hard during this era the fluff was so good. arguably my most comforting era? idk i can’t rly explain that one

okay so these two r kinda completely different but also (for obvious reasons) the exact same. gotham was my most openly gay era and for that i will forever be grateful HOWEVER the kristen kringle haters were doing WAY TOO MUCH like she’s already dead why u doing her like that constantly (u will see this sentiment echoed later abt someone else hmmm i wonder who) but yea and then YES i was a paul dano lesbian (literally wasn’t out as lesbian at this point lmao) honestly this is probably the era my friends hated the most they would either awkwardly pretend to agree/care abt the shit i was saying or straight up tell me i was delusional 💀 my friends even now still call it my worst era but i LOVED IT kinda solidified my position at the bottom of the hellish secondary school hierarchy but i still had a good time. the paul dani riddler fanfics r next level tho the way ppl would just post STALKER fics constantly with like zero warnings and it was never labelled as yandere 🧍‍♀️i also got in an argument with a writer on wattpad bc they made the riddler and the oc have like a 6 year age gap and they met when she was 10 and he was like 16 💀 other than that good vibes all round

tbh this era was pretty brief i can’t fully explain what happened here like the vibes were immaculate but also insane WHY IS THERE SM YANDERE FANFIC peter parker is so nice but then in fanfics it’s like 👹 but i rly like spider-man HOWEVER this then led me to my final destination on the comphet journey…

omg were finally at the final stop the peak of comphet ( i came out as lesbian within this era ) arguably not my finest hour bc i swore i would never watch criminal minds bc the number of seasons is WAY TOO MUCH but here we are i watched it bc i read too much fanfic abt this man. i have lots of criticism for the fandom but he in himself is acc a rly good character. this was supposed to be like my ethical era but he’s acc killed like a bunch of ppl and thomas gibson is MESSY (don’t cancel me pls i say that lovingly 🫶) the haley hotchner misogyny nearly killed me off i don’t think i’ve ever been so miserable in a fandom and the fanfics kinda take feminism back a few hundred years but pretty good besides that

anyways there is my brainrot i hope the two (at most) ppl who will read this enjoyed 🫶 LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO im gonna say i posted this in honour of international lesbian day even tho that was several days ago

[aranarumei]

Ask game time good morning!!! Maybeee considerations on hanakou and Aoinene tbhk..? And classic tsukkiyama haikyuu :3

ask me about a ship and I’ll give my opinions + classify them as does / doesn’t make sense, does / doesn’t compel me

and good night! this is like 12 days overdue lmao... do forgive me. since u asked for three I’m gonna have to go under the cut:

first, hanakou! I’m gonna say it does make sense, doesn’t compel me. I think like. I can see the bones of it—kou clearly cares for hanako, and his belief in him is to the point that he’ll stand up to his own brother about it. and this isn’t just bc he likes nene! it’s bc he cares about hanako in his own right. I think I really enjoy kou’s perception of hanako… there’s this line in the red house where he’s like. it would be easier if hanako was just an evil spirit and that’s always stuck with me. it’s also cool how hanako, for some point in time, is the only person other than kou who even knows about mitsuba. they’ve both got their own repression issues huh? where they just do things without explanation. the reason it just doesn’t compel me is like. I don’t have any real incentive to see it romantically? like. hanako’s relationship with kou is interesting to me in part because of how kou’s relationship with nene and mitsuba affects his relationship with hanako. his love for the both of them and wanting to “save” them aligns with how hanako wants to save nene, only hanako’s operating with a much higher degree of cynicism (and, some would say, realism). so i think it’s interesting to have this friendship between the two in the middle of that, and I don’t really feel an impetus to make it romantic.

aoinene on the other hand… it does makes sens and does compel me! aoinene’s so fascinating to me because like. they clearly adore each other and they’re like. girl best friends yknow. only nene doesn’t tell aoi about the whole ghost thing for the longest time and aoi doesn’t tell her about her issues with her hand. nene kind of idolizes aoi as this perfect popular pretty girl and I think, in some ways, aoi treats nene the same way? but her perception is of this naïve good-spirited kid she can’t quite be honest too. so like. that’s compelling, that they both love each other, but their understanding of the other lacks. and from the first chapters we see that nene’s like, dazzled by teru’s shine and such… she’s obviously kind of taken by this façade and also this very thin and minimal crush that’s not really love, right. so I feel like I could see aoinene be really interesting because aoi absolutely has her own version of this façade. we get into lots of fun stuff about honesty and what’s real and such. so this could definitely compel me romantically even though I haven’t thought about it much.

and tsukkiyama!!! does make sense and does compel me are you kidding me. what more do you need than pride!!! gonna lay down forever about it. tsukishima and yamaguchi are a really fun longtime-friends dynamic because they like. change? their relationship evolves but it doesn’t make them not important to each other, even if the shape of themselves and their interactions change. which is why that bond feels so strong. they both think each other is kind of the coolest actually. I’ve never really had the need to read much fic abt them tho? maybe I’ll look again sometime but its just like. man. their relationship in canon is so good to me already… ch 86-89 my beloved. the manga does a really good job of like… their relationship always feels real and solid but they’re also 100% individual people. and it’s such good development too. neither of them becomes a crazy genius but they develop as people. I love how hands-off tsukishima’s growth over canon is… like he’s a genuine good kid that just thinks a lot, and I don’t think he’d respond so well to people steamrolling over him with their own assumptions yknow? anyways tsukkiyama’s good. works in a sorta understated way where it being not too emphasized makes it work more, yknow. I loved reading haikyuu!! and thinking like why does a guy like tsukki hang around someone like yamaguchi? and then understand. oh. they’re both so earnest.