#hyperfixation has my whole being
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Did I finish all 14 seasons of Doctor Who?
Yes I did.
..
Did I immediately start the whole thing again from the beginning?
You bet your ass I did.
#hyperfixation has my whole being#doctorwho#the doctor#rose tyler#the 9th doctor is about to leave again#send good thoughts
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why can't i enjoy things like a normal person? casually, just a few episodes/chapters here and there, then move on with my life. but no, whatever it is, it worms its way into my brain, consumes my thoughts and it slowly drives me insane. i am unable to think about anything else but the Thing of the week, or month, sometimes year(s) if it gets that bad.
#dc#smallville#henry danger#i never thought i'll be here. like actually. smallville is not a surprise i've always liked heroes. i love supes. marvel and dc and whatnot#by proxy me being lowkey into henry danger shouldn't be such a big surpise. but it is. i'm a little lost even i mean what do i do with THIS#because it's not the kind of hero stories i tend to gravitate to. i first watched the show when it aired (being around 16 years old)#and i remember thinking it was funny. maybe too much. i was laughing my ass off really. and now as an adult i find myself#looking for the things that gave me some modicum of comfort in the past. it so happens that one of those things is this silly wacky series#i know when something has embedded itself into my mind in such a way that a hyperfixation is in the making. but still. it's odd#again i cannot reiterate how strange this hyperfixation is and i can only hope it won't last long#because i cannot stay up any longer thinking of how deeply complex both ray and henry are#the connection between the two and whatever weird bullshit they have going on as individuals is. just too much for me#idk. i'm kind of losing my mind#this whole rambling of unorganized thoughts goes specifically for:#lex luthor#ray manchester#yipyip
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I’ve been highly confused as to why Michael “deeply openly thirsting on Twitter about David Tennant for half a decade” Sheen is half-in half-out the closet but apparently Wales is absurdly homophobic lmao what the fuck how is a country the size of New Jersey that much of a hater bruh we out number the shit out of you
#i thought googling ‘how to say gay’ in welsh would be funny but it just made me sad#i knew the uk in general had a problem with trans people but WOW it’s fucked up in wales like. there are 8 of you what are you doing#i feel bad now lmao#wales#my weird welsh hyperfixation has taken me places let me tell you#cymru#homophobia#gay#lgbt#lgbtqia#good omens#bbc staged#michael sheen#i thought he was just ‘oh i’m quiet about my personal life’ but that’s not even true like my man’s probably actually scared#what a fuckass country lmao awesome#uk politics#united kingdom#david tennant#what is it with this tiny ass island taking over the world and being shitty lmao and this is coming from an american#bisexual#<- bisexual gang gang feel bad you fuckin haters lol#yes the whole world is homophobic i know etc but it’s like outrageously bad out there apparently#stay mad that i think nationalism is dumb ‘how dare you ever have an opinion you american’#you’re white you are not going to like where the power + privilege argument inevitably goes
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So the wildest thing happened where @mactheactor decided to dub over (if that's even the correct terminology) the Chaos Sonic animation I made!!!!
I'm still in utter awe about this like, hands down the coolest thing ever I've been thinking about this non-stop. Hope y'all enjoy it as much as I do!!
#starrway art#sonic prime#chaos sonic#okay now that the nice text for the post is done AHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!#I've been screaming about this for the last 24 hours and the shock of it has worn down just enough for me to post this#NEVER WOULD HAVE GUESSED THIS WOULD HAPPEN IN A MILLION YEARS????#Sonic Prime is what got me on this long hyperfixation in the first place and I've met so many cool people in the fandom#and generally having a blast making art and it's been such a great time#so to then have Deven Mack come in and think that my stuff is awesome is such an insanely cool thing#it means a whole lot is what I'm trying to say haha#I do have to like microdose on this video because it makes me so incredibly happy that I get very overwhelmed by it#In a very good way though it makes me want to run laps outside#thanks to everyone I've met/interacted with so far being some of kindest people y'all are awesome#idk if this post is even like coherent I've been writing it in my mind for the past day because I have no idea how to even go about this#ok good night hehehe
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i will call myself autistic and people will think i'm just using it as a silly, chronically online, tiktok-diagnosed-me term, and then they'll spend a little bit more time with me and they're like oh
#if you know me on a super surface level i can pass as kinda normal#but the more time you spend with me the more obvious it is tbh lmao#like when i say that i am autistic i fully mean it#stimming hyperfixations meltdowns and all#the whole shebang#but it also kinda sucks that the term “autistic” has been kinda watered down so much#people don't really see me being autistic as the same as me being disabled#cause like yeah i'm autistic and i really like my silly little tv shows and spending lots of time on tumblr#but i'm also autistic and need lots of alone time in order to properly interact with other people#i'm autistic and i don't like any form of physical contact no matter how well i know you#i'm autistic and loud sudden noises affect my ability to function#i'm autistic and if i push myself too hard i WILL burnout and that will be unable to perform basic tasks#i'm autistic and eye contact is almost impossible for me#i'm autistic and i will regularly miss social cues and accidentally come across as rude#and it sucks that i'll say i'm autistic and people won't take me seriously#and then they'll act surprised when i an autistic person act autistic#but at the same time i can't lie it is kinda funny when i tell people i'm autistic and they're like#“but you seem normal”#cause oh boy#you have no idea#my posts#ah i love rambling in the tags#autism#actually autistic#autistic things
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Tumblr spamming billford and billfiddlesford has singlehandedly gotten me to finally watch Gravity Falls and I can't even be mad lol
#this show is actually so good so far!! I just barely passed the middle of season 1 but I'm having way more fun than I'd expected#I'm watching it with friends too and we've got the whole spectrum (not the autistic one) - one of us has already seen the whole show#one of us has watched it out of order#I've only seen plot points and vague spoilers online while the last of us knows NOTHING about gravity falls minus memes#Ford popped up in an episode recently and we had me and the first friend jumping out of our seats and the last being so confused LOL#I can't watch it all the time cause my friends are busy tho 😔#they're actually doing homework and being responsible??? 🤨 (cringe moment /j)#but I have to bully them every once in a while to watch it since I wanna know what makes this show's plot hook so many folks#(billford fanfics are so fun to read in the meantime when I barely know any plot context btw xD)#but yeah that's what I've been doing recently lol#this show's constantly got me dangling on the edge of a hyperfixation and I love it still#gravity falls#fenn rambles
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Can I be mega autistic here and vent for a second and ask if anyone else is lowkey scared for whatever the next RE game is HSBWHDNDJ
#having hyperfixations/special interests combined with a PARALYSING fear of change SUUUUUCKSSS MAAAAANN. IT SUCKS ASS#like realistically I KNOW it’s silly and I KNOW I’ve got nothing to stress over BUT ITS STRESSING ME OUT BAD AND THERES NOTHING I CAN DO#RE4R/Luis has been SUCH a massive comfort of mine and turned into a full blown special interest and I guess the thing I’m most scared of is#the fandom moving on and forgetting abt re4r/luis as a whole which again I KNOW is silly but I can’t control my brain!!!!#and also combined with the fact that Luis probably isn’t coming back to the franchise at least anytime soon is HEARTBREAKING man. like thats#my special interest!! that’s the thing I’ve poured hours of my time into!!!!! I’m scared to see people move on#he’s already a fairly unpopular character in the wider fandom too!! and the fact that the content we do have of him is ALL we’re gonna have?#I dunno that makes me so much more stressed out and anxious than I should be which. again. I KNOOOOOOWW IS SILLY BUT I CANT HELP IT MAN#THE AUTISM!! THE AUTISMMMMM#I dunno I’m expecting Capcom to announce their next game this summer fest and it’s genuinely stressing me out sm which I hate#I hate being so afraid of change it sucks so much man#anyways sorry for the massive vent I just had to get this off my chest cuz it’s been weighing me down massively and making me more anxious#than it has any right to BCNDNENDJXJ#and again the fact that there’s a solid chance we may never see him again at lest not anytime soon is so so so so so devastating to me it#again makes me so much more upset than it has any right to HDNSHENDJDJ#not to mention people who are already weirdly mean and nasty to people who DO like him. I’m Not having a Time rn
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Rip Noel you were just too pretty and Kayne couldn’t deal with the competition
#kayne knew he would loose#hes up against the prettiest man of all times#i have never seen a noel design that is not attractive#look away mutuals im being gay over podcast men again#Blacked out for an hour and when i came too i had this infront of me#IT HAS BEEN SO FUCKING LONG SINCE I HAVE HAD THE MOTIVATION TO DRAW ANYTHING THIS BIG#aka this art style and the fact this is a whole a4 page when usually i work in teeny tiny#the power of noel#LOOK ITS THE FICTIONAL LOVE OF MY LIFE#In like a platonic way where i wanna go to a tea shop with him and eat cake#im so normal about him#Spent more time trying to think of a cool thing to caption this with than it took for me to draw it#noel malevolent#noel finley#charlie dowd#malevolent podcast#malevolent#malevolent fanart#pencil art#traditional art#malevolent noel#detective noel#I havent used this artstyle in so long#the hyperfixation on the podcast man really will just draw out the old skills#golly gee gosh i love him#when i post the initial design sketches for this fucker your all gonna be so disappointed he is so much cooler here#Sleepy times now#goodnight#53 rats with a pencil
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hello friends im still alive just uhhhhh needed a long, long break from social media
what are the hip hyperfixations and special interests nowadays fellow kids
#have spent the past two months hyperfixating on elden ring and it is so weird being a fan of 1 something popular 2 WHILE it's popular#my birthday treat for myself was a mini ranni keychain#its wild bc ive never been much of a merch person bc i always latch on to things that are either not popular as a whole#or characters who are not popular in that thing.#but this $8 keychain has brought me so much joy????#it has become a regular joke w spouse w whoever is holding the car keys to occasionally hold miniature ranni up and go#are you seeing this shit ranni?
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kind of funny thing when i'm writing trans scaramouche (which is always. just doesn't always actually come up) is that i can't get him to call himself a "man" bc he has too much of a chip on his shoulder abt not being human which he feels like is necessarily implied by the word "man" and well he certainly isn't going to call himself a "boy" bc he has ANOTHER chip on his shoulder about being created to look eternally 16
so if his gender ever comes into question he's just like "I'm Male." and i'm like dude you sound like an incel.
luckily no one in teyvat knows what that is
#aphelion.txt#scaramouche#my writing#gender stuff#genshin impact#another thing where i generally believe he has had top surgery in canon however#he is pre op in some of my fics. 1 of them being in the past and another one#being one of the earlier ones i wrote and i just wanted to project my dysphoria onto him and then had to come up with a reason why he#wouldnt have had top surgery and then it kind of turned into a legitimate whole Plot Point. anyway#on those fics i always have to be like ummmm unsafe binding warning i guess#given his general durability its probably not actually unsafe for him but even if it Was he would be king of binding unsafely anyway#you cannot seriously convince me this is a guy who would bind safely#even assuming teyvat has binders i don't think he knows what they are#listen#he could even have trans [Harbinger of Your Choice] trying to drop hints to him abt Other Options and he'd just be like#ok. what do your human clothing choices have to do with me#BACK IN THE SCARA HYPERFIXATION TRENCHES SRY but you already knew that
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I always say "I don't have a favorite genre" because I have songs I like and even artists I like in pretty much every genre but the truth is that some genres have to convince me and some genres are post-punk, prog metal or futurepop and all an artist has to do to get me hooked is be that
#believe it or not i'm actually not a metalcore or post-grunge guy despite my favorite band#that should show just how crazy i am about starset because usually a hard rock band has to make a convincing argument#even if some of the songs are on my playlists there are few occasions i'll be Into the artist as a whole#i'll eat anything starset puts on the table in front of me without even looking#music talk#(goes into special interest hyperfixation mode and stays up until 2 am musicposting)#(finally concedes i'm being annoying and/or need sleep)#(...wakes up and immediately starts again)#anyway i'm getting really into carved souls lately especially their first album
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Oooohhh the urge to yap about my ocs and the world they live in......
#is this the product of growing up lonely with one best friend for 11 years of your life so when she wasnt in school you mae up imaginary#friends and it started off as one but then steadily increased and now your 14 with an entire kingdom with a high population of around 132#and couting because you couldnt stop making ocs based on your interests or hyperfixations or literally anything else to the point where you#could scroll on insta or tt for 5 minutes and think about your little kingdom and think of a character that would fill about 50 plot holes#and this kingdom got so out of hand in your head that you decided to make religons countries languages royal families politics new laws of#physics powers and more because one day you watched avatar the last airbender and decided people could now do water manipulation and#suddenly 50% of characters now possess some sort of magical ability and they all live in a world together that somehow retains peace and#love because the actual name of the planet they live on is peace but just in the language that you made up in your mind. just a little#reminder i started this at 6-7 years old with my gacha life phase going strong which is also how i designed each and every one of my ocs btw#going back this is originally being my imaginary friends I MYSELF AM IMPLEMENTED INTO THIS STORY as it started with my old online persona#that has now become a separate character and now I am a character inside this whole lore so every day i am always thinking about this planet#i made in my head and did i mention ive my favourite genres are action mystery and fantasy??? yeah so thats a main theme#so like theres tons of fighting and betrayal outside of the planet which dives deep into character lores and the whole story line that#this planet follows and i have separated aus of if this wasnt a peaceful planet and if there was some sort of intergalactic war because yes#i am a voltron fan where influential ocs die and thinking or writing that causes me to genuinely tear but because like ive said THESE ARE MY#IMAGINARY FRIENDS they may be imaginary but ive had them for YEARS and theyve been friends with me longer than 99% of my friends so they#mean the world to me so i tend to stray away from the war aus and push that mkre towards my other fics and headcanons thag are heartbreaking#... so anyways!!!#kadens yap session#no but srsly if i were to actually talk to people about this id be shaking in my boots i could not and itd take HOURS#its just a silly world i live in thays all :3
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leon being italian and luis being spanish like ....those are the two most likely and unlikely white euopean people to pair together, it makes them perfect.
who is more catholic out of the two? the only correct answer is luis, whereas leon is an agnostic ex catholic lmao
#now that i know leon is italian i need him to tan just like luis - they are both that kinda white#he has the capability too#can leon speak italian??#i doubt it#but if he can#that means he can actually understand spanish#and i specifically mean the european dialect that luis would speak#sorry but leon being italian and luis being Spanish does not help by European history hyperfixation#but tbh my leon is white passing his dad was the italian one is mom is not#if they find someone who is Portuguese they have the whole trio of catholics or colonizers pick your poison#i am just kidding i love these two#serrenedy#luis serra#leon s kennedy#they are going into my white boy category that i do nawt play about#like what do you mean leon isn't some normal white man from the midwest#what do you mean he's like luis#???#but ntm on them my boys aren't racist#in my personal hc#leon is actually not fully white he's like white passing#luis is the white one#but i digress
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How does one get assigned as sam coded / dean coded ? Do I need a doctors note ? A psych evaluation perhaps ?
#i keep going back and forth on it#bc i used to identify with dean for the longest time bc i was so repressed and emotionally closed off (+older sister)#and at that point id spent my youth very purposefully protecting my younger sibling from our dad#and i guess in my brain i paralleled that with dean staying behind with john while sam took off for stanford#and dean protecting sam from knowing too much abt the supernatural#BUT having grown up ive now become the one resentful and angry at our father while my sister protects him#and our fights remind me a lot of scenes from the show where im obviously identifying a lot stronger with sam#plus the whole thing abt being the families designated academic or whatever#while also feeling cursed from the minute i was born and crushing at the guilt of everything wrong with me#and trying to be a good person and saving others to make for the fact that i feel an intrinsic evilness about myself#so like... yeah sam is very very relatable too in that sense#bc he also has that hope in him- the belief in god. in angels. in goodness. and i have that too !#im just also a miserable cynic at the same time :)#so ????#i havent been in the fandom for long enough to know the full requirements of being a sam or dean girl#(and by that i mean i havent been in the fandom for long AFTER i rejoined from my 10 year hiatus)#i literally would love to read someones page long explanation of what sam coded vs dean coded entails#someone with a spn hyperfixation or special interest needs to provide me with the goods fr 😭#spn
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okay i haven't drawn cloutchase in a bit so forgive me if this looks funky. and i can almost guarantee someone else has thought of this. but as SOON as i saw the twitter X rebrand this is the FIRST thing I thought of LMAO (with the original next to it for reference)
#Socialstuck cloutchase#Twitter cloutchase#Cloutchase#Twitter X#yeah I know his tie isn't actually yellow but shhh SHHHH it looked better. when i was coloring so#ALSO i got an ACTUl art program in-between my posting gap so im NOT using magma (or Aggie . io ) anymore this is AMAZING#gimp has my WHOLE heart#forgive me for being late to the twitter X party I've been deep in the throws of hyperfixations LMAO
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I do not bother to check if Getter and Big O ever interacted in SRW because I’m so use to the other mechas I like being in the same game as getter but being so different that they never have any story reasons to have interactions since Getter is only ever allowed to interact with mazinger, OG gundam and any other combiners + it’s all in untranslated hell so I won’t even know wtf was said if there WERE interactions but god damn it I keep rotating a scenario where Roger negotiates to get Ryoma out of jail even though I know for a fact that DIDNT happen despite how many times they used arma and how Z2 actually adapted it fucking correctly for once but it’s just so funny to imagine.
#meg text#getter robo#the big o#i fucking hate being cursed with crossover ideas when in fanfics that’s ALL there ever is#big o only has it slightly better bc there are some fics but it’s by no means a active tag#and I still need to do my part in at least writing one thing for it but I’m not in the proper mood still#but I legit can’t tell if it’s hyperfixation or the idea of ryoma interacting with rogers normal ass is so funny#Roger is literally one of the most normal super robot pilots compared to the majority but especially compared to ryoma#he has a temper but by no means hot blooded and usually keeps it under control he just has a sense of justice#cue to him meeting “angriest fucking guy to exist” and he’s like “what the fuck”#Ryoma HONESTLY could have funnier interactions if they put him with people who are nothing like him#but noooo it’s always combiners or the other two “big 3” mecha it’s apart of#and I get why the whole big 3 thing in universe or just “hey are robots are similar” is cute#but it never hurts for this loner to talk to more people if they’re gonna characterize him as more laid back#(which- I don’t know how to feel about but I’m glad Ryomas other traits get some spotlight)#since it would be more flanderize if they just focused on him being angry#it still feels so fucking weird how calm ARMA is but that’s what happens when you can’t use anything else#new when will you return from the Wii dimension I don’t understand why your so unpopular
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