#how much does my opinion really matter?
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Me tying my fingers together to keep myself from going on and on about how I just cannot understand what specifically is so special about Taylor Swift that she’s risen above everything knowing a simple look at my music taste and interests is enough to rebut hours worths of arguments about how insanely normal her music sounds
#like girl if you’re gonna kill all of the polar bears drop a beat or two#I’m not saying she isn’t talented either don’t get me wrong#I think she’s a great singer with catchy songs and ….#and yeah that’s really it#she has a nice voice and her songs are generically catchy#idk how she keeps pulling in all of these Grammys and huge fan bases#but then again I see that is a problem on my end that I must fix#becuase she’s obviously doing something right and who am i to piss in her pie#I mean when that pie is filled with tons of oil just getting ready to drench the ocean#but I digress#no matter what my critique is this still is. a multifandom blog with a lot of dan and phil and 21p content#therefore#how much does my opinion really matter?#rae’s rambles
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thinkinnn bout arthur pendragon. my baby boy. he's such a bitch but also such a baby girl.
he never felt the love of a mother and relied on his father for all of the love and validation he needed growing up but uther never gave it to him unless he succeeded in battle - probably against druids/sorcerers. arthur never feeling like he was enough, that he was never worthy of love unless he did something for them or won a battle because that was the only time his father looked at him with a modicum of warmth.
being a prince raised to one day be king and being taught to never trust anyone, that as king he can only trust himself, and then watching his father fuck over the people of camelot and going "a king must make hard choices" but arthur never agrees with any of that!! he puts on the aloof asshole act to keep people away so he doesn't get hurt but baby boy wears his damn heart on his sleeve. he cares. SO much. he trusts everyone, no matter how many times he's been betrayed. he does everything he can for his people
he strives for their love and pride because he never got it growing up. he works his ass off to be the best king for his people that he can be, so he can be the best heir for his father that he can be, so he can be the best son for his mother that he can be - all so he can prove that he's good enough and worthy enough of love. yet time and time again, he's betrayed by those he has done nothing but be there for. time and time again, the people he's loved and trusted most have betrayed him and left him like he was nothing. proving to him time and time again that he wasn't enough, that he'll never be enough for their love or loyalty.
#INCLUDING merlin btw#i love merlin and as the audience we understand merlin's pov a lot better#but speaking from arthur's pov...merlin also betrayed and hurt him DEEPLY by hiding and lying to him for years#in the end ofc arthur realizes that merlin never meant to betray him and that he really does love him#and that kinda makes merlin the one exception#but for a moment he was also betrayed by the man he loved most#the man whose opinion mattered most to him#god could you imagine how broken and worthless arthur felt then? its why he couldnt even look at merlin afterwords#not only bc he was angry at merlin for lying but bc he was ashamed and embarrassed at not being enough once again#arthur pendragon they could never make me hate you#bbc merlin#arthur pendragon#kind of character study??? idk#or is this meta???#idfk tags bro#dont ask me#this is just a page from my tear-soaked diary#i love him so much#arthur pendragon needs more justice
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There's this weird phenomenon where the people who are really, really invested in Campaign 3 being The Best try to argue that it's the most closely bonded party. when in fact the absolute strongest material with Bells Hells thus far is them realizing with a shock that they've spent almost three months alternating between "my way or the highway" and smoothing things over to the point that they almost shatter along with Ashton and realize that they absolutely cannot go on a time-sensitive, mission-critical journey to save the world without stopping to take a team-bonding vacation.
And to be clear, this rips, but it feels as though while Campaign 1 and Campaign 2 fans might disagree on their favorite campaigns, they do like their campaigns for what they actually are and simply have different preferences with regards to what kind of story they like. This particular flavor of Campaign 3 fans, and there's a decent number of them, only care about winning on the most kindergarten-ass "all you need is love 🥺" axis (also, shades of the bean-counting/points approach to media analysis) but as a result they put forward an idea of the campaign that's simply not the reality and it's like, do you like Campaign 3? Or do you like the fanfiction version of it you wrote in your head based on the first 10 episodes and into which you have slowly dissolved your brain? There's plenty of valid reasons to enjoy or even prefer the campaign, but it's easily the most dysfunctional party and that's fine!
#queue#the mewling THEY'RE FOUND FAMILY THEY'RE THE MOST BONDED crew is like. canonless behavior and for what.#you are allowed to love things that aren't found family soft cottagecore fluff tender cozy. in fact you should. that stuff blows.#I'd also add that like the issue isn't that there's no love; it's that the love is outweighed by the dysfunction#eg: does it matter how much imogen loves people if she doesn't respect their boundaries nor trust them?#honestly this relates to maybe my most core opinion re: the current CR fandom:#the whiniest people re ships or campaigns or characters mostly hate who plays them or who is in the campaign#rather than ship or campaign itself. ie: i think most people who are like this ultimately want C1/2s plot but c3's characters#bc it frequently overlaps with them not really liking the whole moon plot or blaming that for the party's issues which.#babygirl that is the fucking campaign. it's the moon plot campaign. if you don't like the moon plot you don't like C3.#cr tag
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The thing that kills me about the Star Wars prequel trilogy and why I will die on my hill that my problem is not that Star Wars is a tragedy, its that its a badly written tragedy, is that Anakin Skywalker was at his closest to being a good Jedi when he was ten years old.
#im not an anakin apologist by any means because I get the point of his character and Im not pro or anti jedi#my only real opinion on all of it is similar to what I was saying about Peter and Tony and the MCU yesterday#its badly written. its EVERYONE being contorted into shapes that dont make a ton of sense in service to#getting characters to where they need to end up for certain things to occur#my opinion is not that Anakin is inherently bad or good or that the Jedi are inherently bad or good#its that their entire conflict was set in motion by forcing the Jedi to act in ways that felt massively OOC when they were#first interviewing him as a kid and like.....I ACCEPT that the Jedi are supposed to be for the most part kindhearted and empathetic and all#of that which is why its so noteworthy in my opinion that this does not match with how they were FORCIBLY portrayed in those early movies#in order to ENGINEER the idea that this kid in desperate need of support but already with a lot of good instincts and positive traits#came to the order of kindly supportive literal empaths and everything went downhill from there#like kindly supportive literal empaths would not in my opinion look at a kid trying his best to be brave & stoic in completely intimidating#circumstances and surroundings and be judgmental and fairly dismissive about it as though theyve never met a kid before let alone a#traumatized one and the fact that thats kinda what happened is in contrast to how a lot of pro anakin people frame that NOT proof#that the Jedi order are inherently bad its that in that key scene and multiple others#the Jedi order were BADLY WRITTEN in pursuit of one pre-determined outcome that mattered more to the script/Lucas than#being true to their core conceit and characterizations. and thats just one example out of dozens I could list and the same holds true for#anakin's side of things so thats why I always steer far away from SW discourse#because Im like the problem with the characters in terms of the most iconic arc is not really any of the characters so much#as the plots refusal to let them actually consistently BE characters rather than just fixed and contrived stepping stones on the way to#the desired endpoint
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sometimes i remember the hunger games and how nobody actually paid attention to what was in those books
#americans close your eyes and ears right now#i'm well aware that my political takes are way too spicy for you all#and i really do wish my media diet didn't contain so much us-centric shit#but alas we're all suffering here#and i could say that 'oh actually it does matter who your president is for us in the world'#but it doesn't. it really fucking doesn't. that's kind of the point.#oh i'm sorry my spicy takes are already starting#anyway it is wild that you all can understand katniss assassinating coin at the end of mockingjay#but get super upsetty that chappell roan won't support your favorite presidential candidate with her full chest#like come on none of you actually thought that her using the phrase both sides meant that she was a republican or even a centrist#that's just copium#you all knew exactly what she meant#but i guess encouraging people to think critically and get involved with their local elections and politics as well is... bad now?#also... why do you all care so much about a random pop star's opinion and whether or not she dares to criticize a government#like... she's right but i'm sure 5 years from now if she survives in the limelight her edges will be completely chipped away#by all this insane reaction#and before anyone comes for me... no i'm not saying you shouldn't vote. please fucking do.#neither am i saying you shouldn't vote strategically or encourage other people to do so#but if all your energy is spent policing people who criticize your chosen party because of their own principles#then there's something seriously wrong with your politics#and all you're signalling is that you truly do not fucking care about the issues that they care about#if anything..... you RESENT them#and then the same people bring up the parable of the 'unjust man'#or how it's never the right time to talk about gun violence in your country#harm reduction is all good and based but attacking people who are leveraging their support to push your party left#is not. it's not even fucking helpful#anyway. don't base your lives and politics around pop stars.#even if they are more based than you 🤷#i think i'm done now thank you tumblr for letting me have insane rants in my tags that hopefully no one reads#idk i just find this all depressing. i wish you all cared more about the world outside of your bubble. i wish we all did - myself included.
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I always think about how in multiple episodes it's basically canon that Blanche is bi but considers dating women to be more hassle (which is a whole rabbit hole to go down - does she struggle with societal homophobia when she's with women? Has she only been with fellow high maintenance femmes when shes really after a Dorothy type? Has she internalized the idea that her attraction to women isn't 'real'? Her reaction to Clayton adds to these questions). Not to mention how this goes together with her relationships with the girls; making to kiss Rose that one time (and Rose multiple times seeming very aware of Blanche's proclivities), begging Dorothy for 'relief' and being convinced she's attracted to women too.
Yes, anon! It’s really interesting to delve into Blanche’s psyche about all this stuff!
I started writing down my thoughts and ended up with a long ramble -- allow me to place it all under a cut, so I don't clog up anyone's dash, haha.
Personally, I think she has some strong mental blocks when it comes to her sexuality because of the way she was brought up. I mean, she grew up in Atlanta approx in the 1930s/1940s — I’m sure I don’t have to detail the kind of casual bigotry she must have seen around her during her formative years! Just look at the story she recounts in S1E13 A Little Romance:
“Now, you have to understand that in those days in the South a lot of things were still taboo. Certain people were not to mix. So Benjamin and I had to meet in secret. Oh, we knew if any of the bigots in town found out about us, there’d be a terrible scandal.”
And all of this because Benjamin was a yankee… can you imagine what ‘the bigots in town’ thought about homosexuality? Yeah, I’m pretty sure Blanche learned to suppress that part of herself very early on. We know she turns to denial when she’s faced with uncomfortable truths and emotions she can’t deal with, so I think she likely just refuses to acknowledge that part of herself most of the time, and it only comes out (pun intended!) when she’s not paying much attention to things, or when there’s something more important going on. See the two examples you point out: when she tries to kiss Rose she’s concerned with not being kissed at midnight, and when she propositions Dorothy she’s, well… she’s desperate to get some, if we can be frank.
When she’s in a more rational state, her reactions tend to be more measured… but not by much. She does advise Rose not to date women (S3E10 The Audit):
“Oh, no, honey, don’t do that! No job is worth having to date women!”
But she’s also really flattered at receiving lots and lots of phone calls from women, after her appearance as a ‘lesbian’ on TV (S7E15 Goodbye, Mr Gordon):
“By the way, Dorothy, if I were a lesbian, I sure would be a popular one. Look at this, 20 calls.”
And of course we can’t forget her reaction to finding out that Jean has a crush on Rose in S2E5 Isn’t It Romantic?:
“Jean has the hots for Rose? I don’t believe it, I do not believe it! […] To think Jean would prefer Rose over me? That’s ridiculous! […] Now you tell me the truth: if you had to pick between Rose and me, who would you pick? Who?”
All of these are (likely) intended to be jokes about her vanity and her libertine nature (in the same way as Rose’s observations are), but considering a lot of the writers of this show were queer themselves, it wouldn’t seem strange to me if they were intentionally peppered in to suggest that Blanche might be a bisexual in denial. It certainly fits her character!
I haven’t spoken about her reaction to Clayton’s coming out yet, but that’s immensely interesting too, of course. I think Blanche has the same attitude towards homosexuality that I see in a lot of (mostly older) people in my Country nowadays: it’s fine as a general concept, but when it comes to her family (or, God forbid, herself) then the problems come out. See for example what she says about Jean:
“Well, I’ll never understand what Jean doesn’t see in the opposite sex, but if that makes her happy, that’s fine by me!”
Which isn’t a homophobic attitude at all! If anything, if you take her upbringing into account, it’s pretty accepting. But then, when Clayton comes out to her (S4E9 Scared Straight) and tells her he wants to get married (S6E14 Sister Of The Bride), this is what she says:
“Oh, Clayton, please be serious. You're just saying that so I won't set you up with any more women. […] Well, then you're saying it 'cause you're trying to get back at me for something. Clay, I know you too well for this. After all, I know it can't be true. You're my brother. […] Clayton Hollingsworth. You look me in the face and tell me you really are… what you just said you are.”
“I'm having a little trouble putting this all together. Clayton, I just feel like I don't know you anymore.”
“[…] Dorothy, that's different. We're talking about going out in public. Oh, what are people gonna say?”
“Will you tell me why you want to put yourself and Doug through this? You know how people can be.”
“Oh, look, I can accept the fact that he's gay, but why does he have to slip a ring on this guy's finger so the whole world will know?”
Quite the difference from her attitude towards Jean, wouldn’t you say? I think there’s three elements at play here.
1) When Clayton comes out to Blanche, she feels disoriented because this is life-changing information Clayton has never shared with her before. While her reaction as a whole isn’t ideal, personally I think it’s understandable. Clayton is her baby brother; she’s known him as straight all his life, he’s been married to a woman for years before his divorce, and she recounts an episode from their adolescence when he was on a date with a woman and very clearly implicated having a physical encounter with her. He's done everything in his power to pass as straight until this point in time -- I don't find it strange that Blanche would be shocked at his coming out, especially given her upbringing (and the fact that this is set in the 80s! We can't expect modern sensibilities from the characters!). Once again, her reaction isn't the best (she can't even bring herself to say the word 'gay' at first...), but the shock per se isn't that surprising, imho.
2) Blanche is scared because of societal implications above all. She doesn't necessarily see being queer as something wrong, but she's been taught it's not socially acceptable and acts accordingly. Notice how she's worried about what people are going to say, and she struggles to accept that Clayton wants the whole world to know about his relationship with Doug.
Societal expectations in general are a big theme for Blanche's character, and often drive her development; another big example of this is her attitude towards Rebecca's decision to get artificially inseminated, but it's a bit of a baseline issue for her, I feel. She has this whole thing about her beauty and her (supposed) youth and her attractiveness that has some inherent elements, but it's mostly an issue of how other people perceive her, I think, and her response to her brother's coming out is easy to relate to this theme. I mean, she even says it to Rose in S7E15:
"Well, I don't mind being labeled a lesbian, honey, but since I'm not, you just ruined my social life."
So yeah. I think it's safe to say her main concern is societal disapproval of queerness: she wants to be accepted and celebrated by the people around her, and she thinks that being openly queer will destroy her place in her social circle (and she's worried about the same happening to Clayton too, of course).
3) This is sort of related to point 2, but it felt distinct enough to treat it separately. I think she might have reacted so badly to Clayton's coming out (and especially to his showing up with a partner) because he's open about his sexuality, and she's not ready to face what that means for her. My lovely mutual @\hecatesbroom recently published her latest amazing work the odd one(s) out, on the relationship between Dorothy and her brother Phil and how Phil's open queerness might have impacted Dorothy; I think a similar situation might have occurred between Blanche and Clayton after his coming out.
Blanche has a sort of advantage on Dorothy because of her bisexuality, in the sense that she has 'passing privilege' (I really dislike this concept, but allow me to use it to make a point): it's painfully clear that she loved her late husband with all her heart, and she's obviously attracted to men as well, so she can pretend not to like women without too much of a hassle (whereas, if you believe Dorothy to be a repressed lesbian, her situation is much more complicated).
The issue with this is that this 'advantage' is a double-edged sword: she might have the comfort of being socially acceptable, but she's had to suffocate a big part of herself to obtain that comfort. And so, what happens when Clayton -- her baby brother Clayton, the one who's always been just like her, who's grown up with her same environment and influences -- begins openly living as a gay man? I'm sure the situation must have had a strong impact on her, even if just on a subconscious level; I've always found it curious that she seems to have a harder time accepting Clayton in S6E14 than she does in S4E9 (she even calls his sexuality a phase), and while a part of it may be attributed to the higher social exposure Clayton's commitment to Doug brings, I think this may be a result of her inner conflict, provoked by watching her brother live openly while she's been suppressing a part of herself all her life.
Here I'm assuming she's never acted upon her attraction to women before, but there's some space to believe she has done so and has decided it's too much of a hassle, as you say -- likely because she'd for sure do it in secret, given her fear of societal condemnation. If she has been with women before, and decided to give up on it, I still think she'd be greatly impacted by Clayton's coming out: it means her baby brother is a) braver than she is, and b) going to openly face (and likely suffer because of) the same social issues she's run away from. In this lens, I find it interesting that she cautions him about how people can be, almost as if they've both experienced it.
Whew. Wow, this was a lot more than I'd originally meant to write, haha! Seems you sparked a big train of thought, anon! I think all of the Girls (with the possible exception of Sophia) are really fascinating to analyze with a queer lens, and Blanche is always interesting to me, of course. As a final note, I'd like to point out that she does come around to Clayton's sexuality and his relationship, in the end: as often happens, she just needs the Girls' help to put things back in perspective, understand she's hurting someone she loves, and correct her actions. I'd like to think living with the Girls might lead to her becoming more accepting of herself, too.
#this was so much fun!! you helped me pass the time on about two and a half hours of train rides anon :)#this is... Long lmao. but are we surprised? i always end up talking at length#and this subject is Very interesting to me for obvious reasons so...#there's a lot more that could be said i think. all her homoerotic moments with the girls?#dancing with rose? playing pretend with dorothy?#and all the times sophia jokes about them? 'you couldn't stay in the closet for one more day'?#all fascinating stuff no matter how you look at it#i really think her homophobia stems from societal expectations honestly. she *never* expresses the opinion that being gay is wrong per se#she doesn't think it's unnatural or against god or anything like that. the worst thing she says is that 'phase' comment imho#she thinks it's *socially unacceptable*. which is a whole different thing#and considering blanche's whole thing with being accepted by society i feel like a queer in denial storyline really fits her character#like. think of even just this:#blanche devereaux. known for being libertine and unashamed of her sexuality (to the point of being labelled 'a slut').#often described as 'selfish' and 'self-centered'. focused on satisfying her desires and wishes at all times#this woman? having to deny a part of said desires for her entire life? the contrast is DELICIOUS to me#this big fear of societal disapproval was the angle i went with for my blanche/rose fic! it was set at the end of s2#so this was really all i could explore. but it would have been fun to throw clayton into the mix#i really think seeing him be so open about himself had a profound effect on her#oh look at me rambling in the tags too haha. excellent observations anon! thank you for sending this ask!#if you have any more thoughts i'd love to read them!!#oh and also -- when does blanche say she thinks dorothy's attracted to women?#i don't remember it and i'm *very* curious about it#the golden girls#blanche devereaux#golden wives#ask
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Hunger Games rant
This is kind of surprising me because I used to ship Everlark when I read the books years ago but upon a re-read as an adult?
I’m just wandering through the Hunger Games fandom and seriously have to say… I very very much doubt that Katniss and Peeta “would’ve happened anyway” if they were not reaped nor if the Games never existed.
Sure, he had a crush on her which is likely why he gave her the burned bread that day(something that I’m pretty sure isn’t even covered in the movies) which people seem to think makes her required to like him back. Their relationship was also a forced play for the Capitol, she had no choice. If it was “gonna happen anyway”, she would’ve been dating him already by the first book. 
As an (now)Everthorne shipper, I am a little biased but she clearly has more in common with Gale, they had known each other for years, and she even bluntly states that “he is hers and she is his” at one point. Seems straight forward to me. Gale also deserved better than what SC did to him. Yes, he helped to design those bombs but I very much doubt he knew what Coin was going to use them for nor did he know that Prim was going to be there and put in the direct line of fire. Prove me wrong. I’m also slightly irritated that Katniss holds this over his head, and while I understand given that it’s Prim, she should know him better than that. Just seemed like an easy way for Collins to get rid of him so she could pander to fans by putting Katniss with Peeta. Yes, he lied by omission but he didn’t want to hurt her. And I find it odd that she just can’t seem to get over that, while she seems to just instantly forgive Peeta for every manipulation(unintended or not) that he puts her through. 
I do find it funny that some people seriously seem to think that Gale and Katniss actually are cousins. Take the Everlark blinders off, people. You really think that Collins would create a love triangle that involved incest?
She picked Peeta in the end because he could give her stability in a post war world when she had no one, not because she loved him like that. Matches up to “she’ll pick who she can’t survive without” to me. I know people immediately interpret that as “she’ll pick who she loves” but no. If Gale meant it that way, he would’ve said it that way but he also knows the only one Katniss would and could ever truly love is Prim. Peeta does not understand this about her.
The movies just showed a “happy-ever-after Everlark” ending while ignoring that fact that Peeta is still struggling with the hijack(and poses a continuing threat to Katniss because of it) and in the books, Katniss does wonder what kind of future she also could’ve had with Gale like they were talking about before the first reaping. But she dismisses it because she imagines that he’s moved on. Her ending with Peeta comes across to me as “obligation” still. Surprisingly, lots of people seem to get this too I’ve read but most are still “romantic Everlark” anyway. 🤷♀️
Katniss had gone through the books pretty adamant that she didn’t want to marry or have children and yes, that was largely because she didn’t want them to have to go through the Games but it’s also been said behind the scenes that she only did these exact things in the end because Peeta wanted it. Literally along the lines of “I didn’t want children but Peeta did and kept asking until I finally caved…” just rubs me the wrong way.
I think it would’ve been a refreshing change to have ended this series the way Katniss originally wanted. Where she didn’t end up with anyone. (@zalrb here on Tumblr says this all way better than I ever could. Go visit them.)
#my own opinion#anti Everlark#seriously they wouldn’t have just happened anyway had the games not existed#if they were ever going to be a thing it would’ve happened before the first book#hunger games#the hunger games#I just had to rant after going through so much fanfiction where ‘Everlark would be a thing no matter what!’#I also hated starting a story that was marked specifically as Everthorne only to have Katniss meet Peeta#and literally decide two seconds later that she loves him instead and runs off to be with him#how does that make Gale the bad guy? ugh 🙄#Or he is written wildly out of character to justify her running off with Peeta#just had to get all this off my chest#you don’t like or agree? I don’t care really#as said this is my opinion#and rant
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re: "good girl" i think they say it once randomly as a joke and its just one of those things that gets him wayyy more than they expected it would. so now its their secret weapon and they use it very sparingly and every single time he gets super embarrassed about it but it works ill tell you what.
#HES MY PRINCESS IDEK.#i dont think it happens naturally all that much because theyre usually in the business of calling each other names and being mean#so i think this would just be a random night where theyre on top and just think it would be really funny. to yank on his leash and call him#a good girl after bullying him into doing something. and well i just think it would get him is all i dont knowwwwwwwwwwwwww#i havr a lot of thoughts on the matter but i will stop for now#but the tldr is that with each other they tend to switch frequently and are always fighting#so i think itd take someone else being in the picture for hog to even realize how much he likes being a good boy :3#and i also dont think fish would be good at straightforward domming in the way he would want and they both know that#so its something he keeps between him and rat mostly. please dont ask me questions abt jrs sex life i have too many opinions on it#anyways. i think even tho fish knows theyd be bad at that they still feel left out so sometimes they go watch. they dont get anything out of#doing that theyre just sort of taking mental notes#all of this circles back to i think fish has always been the more sexually experienced of the two. and romantically.#i dont rlly think hog is a guy who dates i dont think hes ever been that and i dont think he made much time for hookups#(i think its cute if hes a virgin when they meet but 🤷 im not solid on it)#but i think for him hes just only ever fucked this one person and they do a LOT of stuff and it gets the job done so hes just never really#tried anything else. but. and again i have too many opinions on this but i think rat wouldnt be into their usual shteeze#i think hes a bit of a freak in his own way but the blood and weird anger issues is just not doing it for him most of the time#but i do think if given the opportunity he would LOVE to be The Boss for a little bit so i think he and hog can explore that together and it#will work out beautifully for them. this is great because i am not into strict d/s dynamics like that but i know in my heart that hoggy#would be. and i cant do that for him#again i think fish would be butthurt about this. mostly in a 'why didnt u tell me so we could try this :(' and he would go#'because you would suck at it and wouldnt like it' and they go oh. right. well im still mad#ANYWAYS. circling back. i think the good girl thing would be something fish knows that rat doesnt. and idk if theyd tell him or not#because i do think if they tell him he is using that for evil hog is going to be a good girl forever and ever. rat doesnt have the patience#to space it out the way fish does. which idk maybe thatd be good for hog he could work through some stuff...#but on the other hand i think its fun if they DONT tell him and just bust it out sometime when all 3 of them are doing the deed. or whatever#because again they mostly like how embarrassed he gets about it and i think he would be reallyyyy flustered by it#^ this is essentially part of my fantasy about spitroasting my beautiful wife until he cries just so everyone knows#idk i just think when he lets go of himself hed be a very cute and kind of needy subby bottom and i think hed be really easy to fluster#about it and i want it so bad
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I like him a normal amount (lying) (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#Was I about to type ''Helix Mainfic'' in reference to these wh - I mean Technically but???#Anyway lol#Couple'a random Max's to start <3 Love him#So some of these were made with my .5 and some with my .3 - can you guess which ones? :3#The first one and the last two (and of me lol) were my .5 - the inner three are .3 ♪#You know it's gotten bad when it's not even an Idea necessarily just Want To Draw Pretty - I'm familiar with that pft#He's pretty tho! Love Max ♥#Man if Max's snap had come in the form of Fight rather than Flight - he's a twig but I doubt Anyone would've come out of that unscathed#Anger can make a monster out of almost anybody haha#Pretty boy ♥ My .3 is so fun for soft detailing! And Max is pretty much all soft details lol#Cryings ah </3 Dexter's mention of Max's emotions in his meetup with ZEX got me thinking!#Sadness really does trend low on the emotions he's willing to express in company - even when Dex has seen him cry before - like here#It was out of anger so much more than sadness - no wonder he was spooked by ZEX's sudden grief! Max is fairly private with sadness#Or at least he turns it into anger if he's backed into a corner - drinking by himself and making things harder for everyone else haha#And finally his and Dex's difference in the retelling of the story!! Hehe ♪♫#Since I first read Helix I've been under the impression that what Max told Katherine was - well - how he described it lol#A kind of self-deprecating joke at his own expense - thus his confusion at her reaction of seeming hurt#But that's not what he said at all! That's not even close to how he told it!! Hahaha ♪ Biased narration <3#I even got a second opinion and we shared the same interpretation so it wasn't just a matter of failing to pick up his meaning hehehe Max!#He's so rude ♥ Terrible man ♪ He's the worst <3
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I actually much prefer a lot of how studio VOLN is handling Blue Exorcist over A-1, I know not a popular opinion in areas and get the places people say looks off but the vibes and heart is so good? also there is a lot of amazing shots and imo calling Rin "ugly" in it is an exaggeration to me, there's some wonky shots but there's also SO MANY he looks great! I think sometimes people forget that A-1 had equally bad shots and design choices like I think a lot are looking at the older seasons through rose colored glasses personally! not to mention they ruined a lot of scenes and how they changed them/adjusted them in their adaption that to me affected characterization and making some of the cast look almost dumb in a situation the manga version shows was more serious and dire!
ultimately my view has been: I'd rather an adaption feel like the heart is in the right place and the characters feel like themselves vs everything being pretty all the time and would rather deal with a few wonky shots of characters over a bad representation of a story and characters I love! visuals are not the only thing that matters to me ever
#just my thoughts#and no this isn't to say anyone is wrong for being bothered? I get it but to me it just doesn't matter as much compared to what I like#that they are handling in this season! plus smaller studio really does make me feel they are more likely to adapt further#but yeah just my thoughts mainly everyone is free to feel how they want in the end though#no one is more or less a fan of this series based on their criticisms of an adaption! especially when it comes from a place of love#and just wanting to see a series you love get adapted and treated well when it is! so please don't take my view as an attack on anyone#that sees it differently! everyone is valid in their opinions even if I don't agree on everything!#all that matters to me is the dance with me Shiemi scene was perfect and beautiful haha#and SHIEMI LOOKS THE PRETTIEST SHE EVER HAS ANIMATED#not at all sorry to say I do not like how A1 did Shiemi's design they did my girl dirty in season 1 and season 2 something was off at times#as well! so I'm glad season 3 is treating her right! both character wise and design! plus them actually changing her kimonos and stuff YESS#she feels so much more like manga!Shiemi now and I'm happy! what my girl deserves!#grace rambles#personal
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crazy how people will see you bring up literal scenes from the show, quotes by the duffers, actors, casting director, and costume dept, as well as the stranger things bible/first pitch, and be like "you're so dumb and offensive, that's NOT will, i'm so sick of will being babied and 'fEmiNizEd' blah blah blah" like girl maybe you just don't like women or will byers. have you ever considered that?
maybe YOU'RE the one failing to watch this show with your eyes and ears open if you're out here straight up denying scenes from the show itself. maybe YOU'RE the one failing to see that will has always been brave not despite his fear but because of it, and it's LITERALLY his bravery that inspires mike to start a search party and kickstarts the show. maybe YOU'RE the one that has super regressive, small-minded, and one-dimensional views on what bravery looks like, what strength looks like, and all the different ways there are to be not only a man, but a person in general.
like i just don't know how you can think you possibly know more than the actual people that make this show and dedicate literal years of their lives to making it the best it can possibly be and most accurate to their creative vision LOL like. sometimes you're just wrong!!! suck it up and go find another character that you'd actually like more instead of taking one that's impressively complex and cared for in ways that we seldom see in media!! much less media as globally popular and impactful as this one is, and esp not when it comes to gay male characters!!
will is complex and layered and beloved by many precisely because of that very complexity and capacity to be many things at once that you are so bafflingly intent on erasing!! if you find yourself disagreeing with canon & the creators to the point where you have to completely remove his most important traits and reject the literal show itself, then the fact of the matter is that you just don't like him!! AND THAT'S OKAY! but at least be honest with yourself instead of digging yourself deeper and deeper into a pit of denial and trying to make it seem like the duffers are the crazy ones here and not the fucking stranger things equivalent to flat earthers like 🤦♂️
#i just. girl this is not a matter of opinion canon is what canon is like ??? hello. lmao#are you gonna tell me will isn't gay next. are you gonna tell me he's a jock or something. where does it end lol#when it comes to headcanons you can think whatever you want but headcanons are NOT canon#you can't look at the literal TEXT of the show and go 'hm. no actually this isn't real.'#that's just not how reality works? we need education reform immediately this is tewwwwwww much#gatekeeping will and mike forever until the end of time idc thts my toxic trait we been knew this#keep ur headcanons and enjoy them but don't try to say that they're canon#i love my trans will hc i love it and hold it to my chest so near n dear but i don't say that it's canon..... i believe many things abt#mike's character and his actions etc but i still am always open to the idea that i could be wildly wrong bc s5 isn't here yet#like. i just. can we not equate headcanons and canon . can we not look at literal scenes from the show and be like Mmmm No.#nd make it into a moral issue when it really fucking isn't. will is the way that he is like SUCK IT UPPPPPPPP GO AWAYYYYYYYY THERE#ARE OTHER CHARACTERS FOR U TO PICK FROM!!! CHOOSE ANY ONE OF THEM!!! LEAVE WILL'S ASS ALONEEEEEEE
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I finished Nona the Ninth and.... I was going to make a whole post outlining everything that confused and frustrated me about the book (because there is A Lot) but actually I think I can sum it up much faster. This is a story mostly focused on characters and people, and I often do not care about characters and people. I far prefer worldbuilding to nearly everything else and I think the worldbuilding is there, but it is not really being explained. There is a war happening, and I understand absolutely none of it. I don't understand the sides/factions, I don't understand the politicking happening, I don't understand the goals, I don't know who is leading what or why or where they are etc etc etc. And I don't know if that's a fault on my part as a reader or that it's simply not being explained well. In relation to that, everything is unreliable narrators. And I think I am coming to the conclusion I don't like that. It means I don't know what's actually happening ever and it is beginning to really frustrate me.
#tlt#I like the characters! I do! But I am really only attached to Gideon#I liked all the characters in Nona... but they arent very important to me#I like the making of Paul and thought that was very interesting and well written and moving#but that was pretty much the only character based piece of this story I really loved#Idk. I am going to finish the series.... but I don't understand anything#I think I will have to reread everything but even then idk if I'll pick up all the pieces#I also have opinions about the fact all of it feels like it's happening on post apocalyptic earth....#but it's supposed to be on alien planets and 10000 years in the future. I feel like it should feel far more alien#I did like getting John's backstory and explaination. but I also think he may be an unreliable narrator so I don't trust what he said#and I don't get why everything that happened in his story happened... and like I guess that piece doesn't matter so much cause 10000 years#but it bothers me#AND AGAIN MY GIRL GIDEON WAS BARELY IN THE BOOK#idk. I just want to know who is fighting. why are the fighting. what do they all want. WHERE are they fighting. how are they fighting.#what all science is there. what space travel is there. how does the space travel work.#better explainations of the magic. and the river. what was the tower in the river. (i think some of that will be addressed later)#(or at least i fucking hope so)#idk. I feel like some of this is explained and I just missed it... but I think some of it is absolutely glossed over#and I don't hate open ended worldbuilding entirely but I want better scaffolding#I DONT KNOW. I feel like I'm being mean and so I feel bad#like it's a good book and so many people like them#and I liked them at the beginning!!! but now I'm just confused and frustrated#and I don't know if it's my fault and I'm just too stupid to pick on things and context and hints and stuff#or if it actually was all that poorly explained
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logging onto tumblr and seeing blatant ableism was not something i was expecting but Alright
#izaya is the official number 1 cluster b pd ambassador#me personally ive always been a firm believer in bpd izaya but after doing more research on aspd#i get it like it really does make sense esp a lot of little things here and there#just a horrible take in general i fear. rethink your life choices if yr being ableist over a hc#and shoutout to whoever brought the aspd izaya hc to life 💞💞#i dont usually talk abt 'drama' or whatever but it's so disheartening to see#rly it shouldnt matter that much for someone to make a whole damn post fussing over it#regardless of whether or not izaya has aspd he is beautiful and it shouldnt be that huge of a deal that is my honest opinion#as in if yr that hung up over 'nooo izaya cant have aspd he has empathy!!!!🥺🥺'#1) just go to hell and 2) this should not affect how you regard him that much and if it does you are not worthy of liking him#er thats just me being petty but rly i mean it! it's all unconditional love for izaya here.#actually one more thing i do want to say i really do appreciate the creator of this hc i said it earlier but like#i love analyzing izaya as a character but i am admittedly SO BAD at forming meaningful explanations and stuff#so smth to not only do that but also explain how he fits the aspd diagnostic criteria and how it all lines up... it's really cool#ok sowrry i wont ramble anymore. im writing a damn essay in these tags 😭
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still kinda. idk grates on my nerves? that in botw and totk (ESPECIALLY totk) nearly every other character revolves around in some form or otherwise plays off of link without link. being a character
#im not tagging this. ill likely delete it later. but they really made him the specialist boy that everyone is tied to#and then didnt give him any relevant character traits or opinions he just stands there#its worse in totk tbh bc at least in botw the other characters have stuff going on outside him and are interesting#totk is really like ohhhh the new sages are links friendsss his confidantssss and link does nothing to back this up#every other character does the heavy lifting while link kinda just floats around like a piece of paper with his face plastered on it#it still gets to me how much of a non-character link is while everything else relies on him being a character#they handed out this guy who is very much a blank slate with a handful of gameplay traits and then were like hes v important to the story :#idk hiw to get to my issue with link here. it just boils down to like. hes not treated like a Character he’s more just a customizable avata#they leaned wayyy to hard into the player self insert part while the story tries to go the opposite way with it#he doesnt feel like he has any history or. anything beyond the immediate moment he has nothing#hes very hollow he doesnt react to much doesnt seem to have any kinds of preferences#he has character traits and personality but barely any of it is actually relevant when it matters#link has never really been a fleshed out character but hes usually had SOMETHING more compelling than a premise thats just a trope
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sorry to post about things nobody gives a shit about but mattel has lost their minds if they think that this is worth 90 dollars . what
#i dont even buy the collector monster high dolls though so my opinion probably doesnt matter#well actually my main reason for not buying them is because most are overpriced for what they are so maybe it does matter#that and i just dont really care for some of them. like this one for example#rochelle you deserved so much better bestie#i feel like they just price things however they want regardless of if its reasonable or not#because they know fans who only like g1 will eat up any g1 content they put out#it honestly feels kinda random too? like theyre just throwing darts at the wall to decide how much every new doll should cost
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the one thing that is saving me in the "desperately needs to do an assignment that i cannot care about" department is the fact that i made an arrangement of this piece once. cause im not gonna lie if i had to sit here and analyze alto clef it would ALLLLLLL be over
#i can read alto clef if im actively playing it but sadly analysis is Not That#fuck alto clef and while im at it also fuck all of the other ones like tenor clef etc that are just alto clef but bad at parking. shut the#HELL UP and learn to read ledger lines like a NORMAL PERSON (<- not normal. what flute players do is Not Normal In The Slightest)#(fun fact. flute players read ledger lines so much that by my freshman year of college as a music major i could read a high D (not that#one. an octave Up from the one above the staff.) on sight without having to count ledger lines Despite Never Having Seen That#Note In Practice Before. also Nobody Else really does that as much as flute players because even violinists dont have to compete with the#entire rest of the ensemble being 8 billion other instruments on 8 billion different parts WHILE ALSO BEING THE ONLY INSTRUMENT FOR WHOM#DYNAMICS ARE ACTIVELY REALLY HARD NO MATTER WHAT REGISTER YOURE IN. so because of Flute Gravity (high note = loud. low note = soft)#composers write flutes to be Higher so that they will be Actually Heard and basically thats how you learn to read ledger lines. by counting#ledger lines until you no longer have to count ledger lines. So basically skill issue alto and tenor clef and all the other stupid clefs#like that shut Up and Get Literate Idiot. anyway im procrastinating.)#ari opinion hour#also im sorry violists. its not you its the system.
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