#hopefully this doesnt exist yet

[aurathsmind]

book/tv show pitch a brother and sister from victorian-era england find a time travel device and get transported to modern day new york, they meet 2 modern people and they discover what the future is like, one of the siblings is desperate to get home and has a hard time adjusting and the other becomes obsessed with changing to fit the time and adapt into the future and at the end they decide to separate because the latter doesn't want to go back to their old life

[lightfulonion]

hii @pierogish-side!!! thank you for tagging me!! <3

Last song: This could be us by Rae Sremmurd

Favorite color: mmm really feeling brown rn

Currently watching: OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH WOOHOO!! its so fun (everyone is going through it)

Last movie: The Wonderful Story of Henry Sugar dir. Wes Anderson

Currently reading: im currently studying for uni so im stuck at Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett and The Course of Love by Alain de Botton :(

Sweet/spicy/savory: sweet forever and always

Relationship status: uhhh im dying and rebirthing from my ashes 👍

Current obsession: .....kiribaku..... im back at it again OTZ

Last things I googled: wes anderson (so i could find out what the above movie was called lmao), werewolf (singular), boku no hero academia wiki episodes (this is a call for help)

Currently working on: im in my last year of uni (lmao pierogish... 😭) and i need to finish it so im studying really hard!!! (and trying to not give up) but itll probably be a while until i get my degree. also i bought an old polaroid from a thrift shop and im thinking of making it work

tagging: @skijjiki, @livingonyoghurtandspite,@peachybeesplease, @horson, @mars-matrix

[talkorsomething]

genuinely tried to Be Asleep for like two hours this time and just couldn't. I think i'm cursed [unwell]

[meeowna]

that meme but its 5 am and i have no sense of humor

[quiteliterallyilliterate]

I legit just see you randomly on my feed and your writing was really good and I thought why not? Since requests are open, may I request for yandere skyward sword link with goddess reader? Reader can either replace Zelda herself or is a whole other goddess that doesnt even belong or own Hyrule. Id love to see what else you have in store here!

Order up!

Sorry it’s been a while! I’ve been dealing with a lot these past two weeks but hopefully life will improve (?) Love this concept and there’s a mention of @monpalace’s idea with Skyloftians using shed loftwing feathers to propose. Not proofread, I am sorry, this took wayyyy too. Much like Link, i am eepy. That’s about all!

Hope you enjoy!~

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

There was little refuge for Link on the surface, that much he knew. That much the world made incredibly apparent. Aside from what little lands like that of the kikwi or the ancient temple, there was little non-hostile life. The sun was fading from the sky, Hylia’s light fading from the surface land, letting monsters run rampant across the untamed earth. Not a particularly pleasant situation given the stab wound he’d nursed, limping through the forest as he tried to find a way home. With no statues in sight, he resigned himself to his fate —alone within an unkind world. Not that it’s a first that he’s felt such a manner, everyone knew everyone in Skyloft, his business was never truly his. And with Groose and his goons taunting him for his every breath, there wasn’t much to say for company. He could be surrounded by people, and yet he was —to some level— still alone. That was, aside from Zelda, missing among this realm. There was some small, nagging part of him that wish he needn’t search for her. Sure, he valued her companionship, and yet… it’s been odd lately. Originally he kept from the sky to be with her once more. But now knowing he was a piece in a prophecy —one she knew, no less— he couldn’t help but question the authenticity of their friendship. He feels wrong about it to question. The hylian people serve Hylia, he should be grateful that he’s been sent on a mission she foretold. He should be so many things. It just seems added onto the pile of things he should be. More outgoing, Zelda would say after he’d share his difficulty with speaking to his peers. Less pathetic, Groose and his lackeys would sneer. Dead, He’d often think, looking at the bags under his eyes and tousled hair. So it seemed irrelevant that Hylia wished he’d be heroic. The small decaying temple looked surprisingly stable from the inside. Vines and mosses grew into the cracks within the marble, nature filling in where people could no longer support. The door was easily blocked and the main area was large enough to safely light a fire without smoking himself out. Above a plinth stood a statue, sharp imposing eyes glaring at whomever entered with judgement. Their face was alight with the golds of the fire, setting in the allure within his mind. Looking down past stone ceremonial robes were offerings, placed at their feet, still fresh despite the centuries since any people lived down here. A deity, he noticed a little too late. Perhaps it was sacreligious of him to stay here, the Hero of Hylia taking refuge in a different god’s home. But perhaps that kingdom has since crumbled, their blades too rusted to do him any harm. The blood seeping through his tunic was the least of his concerns as sleep pulled him in familiar as ever.

Link liked to sleep. It was safe and warm, something quite the contrast to the life he’d led. He wished many times both before his journey and since its onset that he could stay asleep forever. It’d be a blessing, to exist in such a state of peaceful serenity outside of a world defined by its wars. And yet, morning after morning, he’d awake to soft sunlight or be shoved out of his bed. Hylia did not wait on him. So waking up to fingers carding softly through his hair as a lullaby —one his memories could just barely grasp at— was a sharp contrast. He felt no pain in his stomach nor the jolt of adrenaline he was used to. Turning around sleepily, he saw you, the very deity he seeked refuge under. He scrambled to apologize, your sharp eyes looking down upon him as he lay strewn across your body.

“I’m- Oh- I-“ He could not, for whatever reason, speak. Much a common theme in his life that whenever he needed his words, they’d fly away faster than a loftwing. Strong arms tightened around him, shushes and soothes whispered to his pointed ears.

“Be at ease. Your goddess cannot find you here” The fingers resumed carding through his hair, twirling the uneven cuts. “You are safe, little hero” Your words bled with a care and endearment he had not been given in so long. His mind latched to you, to your care and your soft treatment of him. He let himself rest limply, telling himself that it would pass soon. Nothing ever stays this good for this long. And yet, there were no monsters to kick in the door or someone waiting on him. There was just you and him. And no other God watching. “She’s put you through so much.” Your statement hangs in the air as Link can’t find the words that dignify a response. “To wander in here bleeding as badly as you were.” His eyes widen and he does his best to pat his tunic, feeling for the blood. And yet there was none. Aside from the rip in the forest fabric, there was no signs of him ever being injured.

“What?” His brows furrowed and he found himself looking up to you. Your skin held an inhuman glint, a glow to it that needed no sun nor fire to illuminate. Your hunter’s eyes had no iris, a scalara of pure white looking back at him. Your lips here pulled to something of a mischievous smirk as you looked upon him.

“I fixed you.” Your tone was a little uncanny, voice unused to conversing. “I used to do it frequently for the before people” He felt his eyes widen marginally. He’d never heard of the ‘before people’ only if what came after them. He knew naught of their societies, nor their deities. You giggled at his curiosity, pressing lightly on his shoulders so he’d lay back down. “It’s been so long since i’ve had such lovely visitors” Your voice was a far off cry in his mind as he buried his face in the nape of your neck. There was no rushing of blood to lull his own rushing mind, and yet you soothed him all the same. “Rest now, little Hero. I will watch the world in your stead.

There were many times afterwards that he visited you. He’d put a beacon near the clearing where your quiet temple sat. Gone was the comfort of absence that came with sleep, that nullifying expanse of nothingness. Instead, he’d seek out you, the glow of your grace soothing the rage he now brought upon the world. At your Altar he’d leave gifts, anything you’d mentioned in passing or anything he knew must’ve been good. You’d offhandedly speak of how much you missed the ancient cistern, and he’d bring you its water. He’d gather the fruit of the Faron woods, making into pies and jam and alcohol for you to feed off of. It wasn’t often, but he’d occasionally get you blood or meat. Not common, he didn’t want to raise concerns, but he knew the spirits would strengthen you. You may have only had a one man clergy, but he was loyal to a fault. He cleared the surface of monsters so you could roam freely, basking in the moonlight as your fingers brushed the grass. His favorite gift to you came in the form of a plume of crimson feathers. You were quite oblivious to the meaning behind the exchange, instead cooing over the bright colors and imagining the majesty of the bird it came from. But he knew that maybe then the other half of his spirit —as the people said— would mingle with your own to care for you as much as you did him. Bound to you perhaps by fate and now with the matrimony of his gift to you, no longer would you lay forgotten to the world. He’d build an empire in your honor if it would be your wish. He’d kill the goddess who subdued you if it were your ruling. Afterall, he was prophesied to kill a deity.

[morganafayes]

morganafayes bbc merlin fic rec list <3

hiiii here is a tiny little fic rec list i made for fun of some of my personal underrated faves in the fandom!! i've tried to avoid stuff that's already pretty well known + have a decent balance so hopefully yall might find some new stuff you haven't seen in here :)

the witch and the queen - toxic morgwen slay <3 very short!

in our quiet hour - i mean just read everything by lupinely. its all so good. its everything. they have never missed. id recommend 'castled' by them too... insane merthur fic. their dynamic is perfectly written. also their gwen character study mwah

heir - gen, arthur & merlin. genuinely have never once stopped thinking about this since i read it and it makes me sick :/

off the deep end - now THIS. this is good shit. toxic merthur modern au where they are exes and hate each other and hurt each other. finally someone who gets their specific brand of codependent toxicity. bbc merlin modern aus peaked here i dont care

swan down - nimueh ficlet about her relationship with arthur. gave me many brainworms............ please read it. its very short and it will make u crazy.

this graveyard - ok i havent finished reading this yet bc its like 10k. but its morgana/gwen and a rewrite of the whole dark tower thing which as you all know is the bane of my existence. society if the the writers had actually written that episode well etc etc.

i hear deserts heal your history - THEEEEE fic of all time. genuinely i have never stopped thinking about this fic ever. i have such complicated feelings on it. it makes me want to die and throw myself off a cliff at the same time. this is the morgana centric fic of all time genuinely she is done SUCH justice here oh my god but also. everyone is very mean to merlin. my poor guy..... :( in terms of morgana fics though. a must read <3 also great exploration of the mergana dynamic. reading this was truly where my mergana crusade started btw. also read their other morgana fic its absolutely fantastic (i havent finished it either though because im slow asf...)

living for the hope of it all - mercelot warriors come get your heartwrenching angst <3 i have more mercelot fics to rec if people want. i hate them and i love them

ouroboros - merlin/morgana. insane freaks at it again. my fave victims of lavender divorce

drawing lines - gwen character study which i <3.

the chakra of merlin - okkk this is a strange one. it feels almost semi incomplete because although it does. end. it doesnt really. its most interesting for its sci fi elements + character exploration which i find really interesting and well done. merlin is truly unhinged here in the worst ways. when is he not though

the huntress' heart - mithian/gwen slay!

tongue tied - yeah its another truth spell merthur fic... what can i say im basic. its very good though!

dragons! - morgana/gwen. super short and cute <333

[kurishiri]

i see that you're playing the JP server and do the translation by yourself, would you mind to describe Alfons's personality? I got understand he's a cat-like-person, but sometimes i couldn't grasp his personality pretty well

anyway, thankyou for your hardwork 🥰 i really love your tranlastions hehe

hii anon! first of all ty for reading my tls 🥺🫶 it rly means a lot to hear. i find it also can be a way to bring over paid content to those who may not be inclined to pay for it…i kinda feel its my way of contributing smth to the community a bit ig haha.

but as for als personality…hmm i kind of opted to go with an approach where i sorta write down my streamline thoughts as i go. so theres not much organization, but hopefully it can give a bit more insight, or smth to think abt! i will put under the cut, as there may be some minor spoilers below.

alfons mini essay ↓

i think he is sort of like a walking contradiction. he does things in the pursuit of his own pleasure, yet his actions always save others who r struggling. he wants to create distance and acts like he doesnt care, and yet he is deeply sensitive. he has no will to live, yet can’t bear to leave others alone. he pushes his views and philosophy onto others, yet he tries to be considerate…perhaps by doing exactly that.

he cant bear the pain, yet if anyone got hurt, he would rather it be himself than anyone else.

he is a hedonist, pursuing things that r pleasurable to himself. he has promiscuous relations with his “friends,” plays around at night, casts illusions within the slums, and drinks away the day and night. he likes fun, thrilling, dangerous games, and his sense of humor stems from his contradictions. but is he really doing all this for himself? to him, escapism is an essential part of life bc life is nothing but a tragedy. if you dont indulge in these pleasures, life will someday crush you. he himself learned tht the hard way and thats maybe why he is quite sensitive to others pain and suffering and wants to relieve them of it. (this is evident from elbie and als first meeting!)

he does it in a way where he can distance himself due to the nature of his curse. again, it all stems back to the mindset of “getting close to them will only hurt them more in the end” bc they will end up forgetting he had ever existed…but he understood and empathized what elbie was going through, and that was why he had stayed with him all these yrs. and even with liam, though he never really meddles deeply, he was able to observe how, when liam needed an illusion, he himself was never in them. in other words, a convenient illusion to liam was one where he was not in this world. and with kate, he knew that she was scared, so thats why he “kept her company” so to speak. but in the end, he cant save himself. he cant forget what he wants to forget, even though he can help others forget their pain, so he is also self-deprecating in that sense.

but, rly, if you stripped away all the outer lyrs, the complications due to his curse and his trauma, at his core he is a very kind and selfless person i believe.

so kind, so selfless, it borders on self-destruction.

[jadecantcreate]

curse of strahdanya has officially taken over my brain! alongside arcane…season two is SO GOOD SO FARR please go watch it if you haven’t. holy shit yall it does not disappoint

spoilers for up to and the entirety of episode 7 of cos — ill mainly be talking about character dynamics (mostly shepnax) but major events and plot developments will be explicitly discussed as well, so, if you’re not there yet, please don’t keep reading (getting spoilered for this stuff is not worth it i promise)

im sorry in advance. im not even done writing everything yet and its already very long

the way i see it, episode 7 is a major turning point for not only the whole story but inter-party relationships as well. i’ll be organizing this a little bit so it’s less text-wall-y (hopefully)

shepherd

there’s the raven mother they find nailed to the wall — the culprit being strahdanya. this definitely fueled the hate that all of the party had for her, but especially shepherd. he literally screams out in anguish and, later, calls strahdanya a coward and bitch — something we’ve never seen shepherd do before.* i think the events in the beginning of ep 7 is what really cemented his and the party’s objective: destroy strahdanya. before, i sensed some kind of ‘wiggle room’: the party would be willing to work with her a bit, though only for a very short amount of time and would probably backstab her. but after witnessing all that? strahdanya is irredeemably evil, not worthy of consideration / sympathy / courtesy, and i think it finally fully dawned on them all

*i also love how much raw emotion shepherd expresses throughout the campaign. the rest of the party has their moments too (i can immediately think of kana and victoria, but im not remembering any significant ones for clayton or sarnax though i know they exist), but shepherd consistently reacts to the hellhole that is barovia in such a genuine way that it grounds the whole narrative and, to me, makes barovia that much more horrifying. in other stories or discussions of stories ive seen like this (and even in the cos party itself), the characters are largely untouched by the horrors that occur in such a setting. which, fit the characters/purpose as it might, distances the audience at least a tiny bit from the happenings of the narrative. but when you have an otherwise grounded, calm, capable individual like shepherd crack? that’s when it really hits you i think. like, the whole thing with sarnax reviving the mother? shepherd being so relieved and overcome with a multitude of feelings that his voice cracks as he holds back tears, begging the mother to rest and not do any work? it made me feel the same way, and it really drove home how wonderful this act is and how dire their situation is. shepherd (and andy by extension!) have drawn the most emotion out of me in my watch, and its possibly the main reason i enjoy his character so much

him being seemingly chosen by the silver dragon (which, again, another turning point) is very compelling in a narrative sense too because shepherd doesnt want power, he doesn’t seem to even like the idea of leading (or at least being pushed into a position of leadership). i’ll touch on it later in the shepherd and sarnax segment (if i dont forget lol, my mind is running wild while i write this)

victoria

i think strahd’s infatuation with her and the physical effects it has (kana’s cleansing ritual failing because the water becomes blood as it touches victoria) is so interesting, especially her inner conflict with her heritage and wickedness (and the distrust it sows between her and the party, at least initially)

i really enjoyed how victoria was vulnerable with kana, and how kana handled it with such care and compassion. this is also a turning point, i think, when it comes their relationship: kana promises to protect victoria, and victoria promises to fight the darkness within her; they definitely got closer after that, and their bond was deepened. i dont imagine strahd would be very happy about victoria not being enamored by her and being helped by her party, though it’s very possible that she enjoys ‘the chase’ (for the lack of a better term)

when they came across the dusk elf in the order of the silver dragon estate-thing, it’s a pretty clear parallel to victoria given her appearance, heritage, and reason for being in barovia. i could be very very wrong about this but its heavily implied victoria’s elf half is a dusk elf, which makes sense considering, again, that she’s in barovia to learn about her lineage and that dusk elves are the only elves mentioned so far. i think this is the first time she’s genuinely made progress in her goal

sarnax

sarnax’s identity revolves around gherix: his whole life is devoted to the fire lord; he’s used to communing with and praying to his god. it’s likely what kept him going in such a terrible place with such terrible odds of survival, let alone returning (which he’s convinced he will not). so when strahdanya intercepted the augury spell he was so clearly shaken. it was one of the few moments, if not the only one, where sarnax was in genuine, utter panic — the whole time shepherd repeatedly asked him if he was alright and he didn’t seem to hear those words at all. suddenly he learned that strahdanya could damage or possibly sever his connection to his god, the being his life is centered around. (kana’s comment certainly didn’t help)

but what happens after — the augury spell reading ‘weal’ and sarnax being able to revive the mother — strengthens his faith. it was tested, but he prevailed. i think he was also filled with a newfound sense of purpose, knowing that, no matter what strahd does, his god considers him worthy enough

about him and kana: episode 7 is the culmination of their slow development towards not only tolerating each other’s beliefs but to understand and embrace them, specifically with kana saying that she trusts in sarnax and his god

sarnax and shepherd

the conversation between them was my favorite moment in this episode by far. there are so many layers,

shepherd so clearly doesnt want to embody his namesake and be a leader, but the silver dragon and someone he trusts so much — sarnax — and fate itself push him in that direction, so he just does. shepherd says:

“sarnax don’t”

“no why would you-“

“why- why- why would you put this on me, why?”

“how can you say that?”

“this was just a job. i mean this was just to make sure we all got here and back safely…how did this happen?”

then, later…

“alright, alright i…okay. i…dont know what to say”

“alright…alright…okay, understood”

“sure, sure. lead the way” and, after sarnax says “no, shepherd. you lead the way, i will light the path,” “…fine.”

essentially, he sucks it up. and that’s interesting to me since shepherd shows so much emotion, so it’s clearly not a ‘men dont cry’-type ideology thing. i think it’s probably related to his desire to do good, and as well as the good doc. after all, the doc gave him his virtue name: shepherd. it only makes sense that he would be written by fate as one: a person who guides the lost through the darkness. so that’s my guess as to why he so readily accepts this burden

i think sarnax being the one to say this also played a role in it^. shepherd witnessed firsthand the power of gherix and sarnax’s wisdom, so much so that he prayed to gherix. shepherd, who was originally averse to anything religious, prayed. and i also think sarnax is shepherd’s only true friend in the party. his relationship with clayton, victoria, and kana feels like professional acquaintances — they’re comfortable with each other and certainly growing closer, but he seeks out sarnax (and sarnax does too) and both have called the other a friend or good friend, on more than one occasion for shepherd and at least one for sarnax. it’s obvious that shepherd values what sarnax has to say and cares for him.

because of that, sarnax saying that he will die in barovia (specifically that he doesn’t “believe [he has] a place back in avantris” and that “whatever it is that [they] achieve here will be [his] end” because he has “seen it in the flames”) and shepherd’s reaction hits even harder for me.

shepherd says “i’m not gonna leave you. i’m not gonna leave anyone.”

and sarnax replies “then it will be i that leaves you.”

it’s the shortest exchange, but it holds so much weight. sarnax has accepted his fate, possibly long before this. but when before sarnax took charge and led the group, shining his light, he steps back, realizing shepherd is the one who (he thinks) fits that role. he still guides, but he doesn’t lead, and he believes shepherd should. but shepherd doesn’t. shepherd’s used to following orders, as we see so many times with him and clayton (but also him and sarnax), and struggles to make decisions for the group — when they ask him where they should go, shepherd seemingly blanks and he just picks whatever as fast as he can (to get the pressure off him, i assume). and despite this, shepherd’s line reinforces what sarnax thinks: a good shepherd doesn’t leave his sheep behind, he goes after and, well, shepherds them.

and honestly the whole relationship between shepherd and sarnax. them being regarded as monsters by others, being dehumanized by, for example, vascha [?] thinking shepherd is a devil and esmeralda calling sarnax shepherd’s pet ->

shepherd answers, understably upset, “he’s not my pet, he’s a person!” i figured sarnax felt the same way, but when he was praying to gherix, he referred to shepherd as “a vessel for [gherix’s] wrath.” so that raised a question to me: does sarnax truly care for shepherd (in the way shepherd does), or does he view him as a tool? it’s interesting to think about. it could be him truly caring about shepherd and seeing him as a capable person who will have a great role in his god’s plans which, i imagine, is among the highest of honors — the first possibility in the question, but filtered through the lens of sarnax’s religious perspective (which i think is the most likely and most compelling)

and there’s the parallel with them being connected to gold and silver dragons: different, but the same. (unrelated tangent but there’s also a very interesting parallel between shepherd being chosen by the silver dragon [‘good’] and victoria being chosen by strahdanya [‘bad’])

sarnax saying “silver will unite with gold” is, on the surface, about the two dragon-gods involved in the story. but i think, on a deeper and probably unintended level, it also applies to shepherd and sarnax growing closer (as they have been since the prologue, following in the footsteps of their respective dragons, and shepherd connecting the two dragons by his faith in gherix and affinity to the silver dragon.

i think that’s everything! hopefully i wont post this and immediately remember something i didn’t mention

thank you for reading all of this <33

[burgycreeper405-blog]

*passes the microphone to you* so what is your fav ii dark fic about m8

super duper glad tou asked and didn't have to make you asked that bcuz no one was asking me about it/hj djfh

but my fav darkfic is simple actually

it's about mephone4

shocker i know sjdhsj

i started reading this when i wasnt even that into mephone yet lol

i was still doing the mp4 stock image meme dance lol

i m very sad that im not sure if this would get updated cuz this was published in april and updated in april, just a few days and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i am hurt in two ways jfhdjddj

caution, there are gorey stuffs there that even if there's tags there, it still shooketh me that i was like, *"holy sh1t, what am i reading?!"* (but not in a negative way) snfhsjf

like it went from 1 - 100 real quick (spoilers, or, warning,, it's about a animal that made me go "wtf" bcuz they're robots, it's fine lmao, but animals mmmmmmmm not sure about that sirmadam djdhsjj, and it's in chapter 4)

anyways, my explanation is gonna be very messy and short so bare with me here, i just wanna get this out now bcux most darkfics are just bad/mid/weird

so, this fic is mostly a what if/au

and that what if is a "what if mp4 failed to escape meeple hq" and ii doesnt exist bcuz, mp4 never escaped,, and the sad part about it is mp4 doesnt try to escape again bcux he forgot about it, cobs made him forget everything that makes mp4 want to leave

did i mention cobs is an absolute bastard here/neg didhjs

like dude, at the start of the fic, he is drunk, and he gave mp4 a smol task

but mp4 failed that task and since he was hella drunk, he smashed mp4 using a wrench, almost breaking him permanently

the brotherly bond of 4 nd 4s really makes it feel all wowie zowie, the author wrote them greatly like holy crap bruv

there's more in that fic, i think theres like 9 chapters and it took me 2 hours to read it in one go djdha

and i think that's the end of my explanation bcux my brain is all over the place rn and i just wanna get this out so bad

i might add more in the future but sheezus, yall should read it if you haven't/nf

i want it to continue so bad but i think it’s forgotten maybe,, hopefully not cuz it was just getting more juicier jhgfj

long story short, i love this fic and im still geeking out about it, i hope i can do fanart for this soon bcux i very much want to but brain says do it later, and you should read it/nf

[msperfect777]

hi I am sorry that this is a stupid question, but I still want to consult you. I am not relieved by your previous article. The contradiction is that even if I am not aware of the wall, I can still see its existence in the next second; on the contrary, when I realize that my desire already exists, I still cannot see it or live in an unwanted illusion. I have ups and downs, moments when I feel like I have it all and moments when it's so far away, I just want to wake up in my new room .

Thank you for your answer ❤️

you have to realize that everything is imagination. having your new room “physically” is the exact same as having it in “imagination” bc everything is imagination. the ego tells you its different and that one is more real than another but its not. absolutely everything is not real and just consciousness. “your” eyes, “your” five senses, everything. the moment u imagine ur new room, u have it instantly and if u look at this “physical world”, u limit yourself to the body, you are limiting your senses. why? bc you think the five senses is all there is (for example, feeling your new room, seeing it, smelling it etc) but what is ur true identity again? consciousness, the observer. you are the observer. you always observe = you are always aware. right now you are aware of these words. as awareness/consciousness, you are always aware and always the observer. everything else is forms of consciousness which are unreal and imaginary. this includes the five senses. so why would u limit urself to something that is imaginary when you are the power itself that can imagine / observer anything and everything? when u limit urself to the body and mind, you think things like “when is my desire coming��� or “why isnt it here yet” and thats not necessary and its useless bc once u imagine it (which is observing it in imagination), you experience it instantly. its like a circle. imagination is all around. its not two parallel lines (one is not more imaginary than the other). ego tells you that there is something more to do to “get” it but you ARE it. your dream room is literally you (consciousness) so why would you need to lose yourself over yourself. you are naturally and always observing so just observe yourself in imagination and boom you got it instantly. the “physical” = imagination. the “physical” and imagination are just imagination and not real. ur new room is not real whether it is in what ego calls the “physical” or “3d” and the room is also not real in imagination bc its all imagination period. hopefully you realize now that theres no difference if you experience it in imagination (by imagining it or by it being “physical” *which is also imagination). you have ups and downs bc of the ego. dw the ego is not real. nothing is. observe the feelings and thoughts (ego) knowing that they are not real and they arent coming from you (your trueself, consciousness/awareness). as you said, “i cannot see the wall in the next second” thats bc you take that as real. this “physical world” isnt real. its all imagination. again, dont limit yourself to the body and five senses. thats not who you are. hopefully this helps. here are two posts that i recommend you read: why everything is imaginary and when ego doesnt understand non dualism. and sorry i answered so late ik u wrote this question like a week ago my fault😭😛

[arromantica-lucha]

i got a lot of thoughts about loveless by alice oseman and if this post seems very one sided well thats just how it read to me. my opinion isnt the end-all and i value how everyone interpreted and was affected by this book. this isnt a closed topic lets talk about it

gripes with loveless by alice oseman

took a while to actually explain that ace and aro are two separate identities and still not that well. it makes aro seem like a subset of ace which is entirely false. its cool there was an aroallo character involved but still

the book title 'loveless' is a real term and identity and the entirety of the book kinda shits on it by enforcing the ideal that its still okay to be aspec cause platonic love can be experienced and any type of love is required or at least better than "not feeling anything and being alone forever"

it was weird for her friends to forgive her over gestures that had nothing to do with apologizing before georgia actually apologized and explained but that may just be more of a personal thing that i didnt like. likewise the story being about platonic love it kinda sucks her deepest connection is with her roommate and not the people shes known for years and wronged

kinda sex negative. i mean rooney says she doesnt dislike casual sex but then that whole thing becomes the reason she hates herself and a reason to cope with being "unloveable" and its kinda lame. you can tell that story without making it seem like casual sex is just a means of devaluing yourself. and you can be sex repulsed and still not do that. it just feels unfair to aroallo people especially who are told they are monsters for enjoying and only wanting casual sex when this book is supposed to be about aromanticism too

(can we also be done with harry potter references??? lets stop hurting trans and jewish people thanks)

basically particular identities' stories shouldnt come at the expense of others and other ways of life. its great and important to write different experiences because no one is gonna relate to them all but no one has to replace romantic love with ANY type of love to feel good about themselves and be human. loveless and aplatonic people shouldnt have to read something that uses rhetoric against their identities within a book about aspec people

things i like about loveless

i didnt relate to it personally but the experiences felt very genuine. internalized aphobia, being hounded by aphobic comments, finding it hard to portray love even in a fictional or artistic sense, etc.

I appreciate the references to race and intersectionality that come with being queer even if they were minimal. so few times is it actually acknowledged that there is privilege when it comes to being understood, coming out, being accepted, etc. the references to that were nice to see because too often intersectionality being brought up is brushed off and blatantly ignored or people pretend like they understand

it was written by someone who is aroace even if there are some things that can be less isolating within the aspec community with the language being used. someone being open about their identities and how they choose to define them in the mainstream world is how we get more peoples voices in there

it has helped people discover their own identity though id still recommend further research on the actual identities being named and ones not named. these stories are the first introduction of aspec identities in mainstream and that hopefully means itll start to expand to other identities within that community that have not yet had representation

this should be the start of developing more rep. the first takes are not gonna represent everyone and its a good thing it exists to tell a few peoples story. but that doesnt mean it should be free from any criticism because thats how we make them continuously better. i hope to see an aroallo character soon. i want the term loveless to be properly used in media and expressed for what it is. i want to stop pretending like ace is the umbrella term for all aspec identities. i want amatonormativity explained as the sociological term it is that harms all life not just aromantic and polyamorous people. i want a polyam aspec character and polyam characters in general. i want disabled and ethnic aspec characters where the intersectionality is just as important to the narrative. i want a whole lot more and to stop prentending like any of that should be unreasonable

[jar-of-maise]

what's up my dears or dearly detested, it's hc time

we're going to focus on love languages with my fav sibling trio today bc i said so

LYNEY:

words of affirmation, physical touch

he has to be a words of affirmation guy fs

but tbh i feel like he'd also try to shy away from it? esp if he's serious (is that possible? well we'll never know) since he has lied...before...and we all know how well detail omission went

so probably acts of service, making you smile, uhhhhhh yeahhhh

probably fond of pet names

will be touchy

i can see him doing pda, not excessively but hes not against it

probably likes hugs? but like the more i think about it the more im not sure about him with physical touch (see Lynette's for more detail) but i think he'd be a cuddle bug

why's this the shortest

oh lyney my poor sweet dear

he gets tired of life, so you're a welcome escape

would lie on your lap

will hold hands with you

would dream of a happy future with you

dude roasts his little brother about still liking fairy tales and pulls this bs smh

honestly as insecure as freminet - just shows it differently

i think all three siblings are traumatised (who could've guessed?)

i feel like he'd pull some very obnoxious french jokes

he likes making you laugh, smile, happy

he's not sunshine he's a solar eclipse

and you my dear, are the stars that surround his entirety

like a planet orbiting him ceaselessly

i dont actually know what that means but apparently it's an actual thing

oh the inherent romanticism of celestial imagery

yeah that's also my tag what about it

i think, though, that lyney can use his charms to very aptly flirt with you

why?

exhibit A: the rainbow rose (real simps know what i'm talking about)

gets lynette to vibe check you, and then her cats, and then freminet (pers honorary judge)

performs exclusive magic shows for you

uh you can let immagination decide what kind of exclusive and magic you want in those

LYNETTE

acts of service, quality time

acts of service girlie fs

she's creepily observant in a good way but like, she also probably accidentally nearly oversteps some boundaries

"Hello Lynette!"

"Hi here's some things for you"

and she hands you a crap ton of stuff that you probably didn't even know you wanted yet

girl just wants the best for you

oh yeah if you're a physical touch person, you might not be overly pleased bc i headcanon her as physically repulsed by romantic gestures and gooey affection (fanfic writers, that's fuel for how she'd react to lyney being in a relationship)

and the reason i hc this is bc of her past, like you can't convince me lynette wasn't traumatised by that noble person

but while she isn't expressive with touch or words, she is a very good listener!

gl if you're allergic to cats too bc she'd def introduce you to them

(if you pass their vibe check you're all good, if not...uh...)

family is very important too so if you pass their vibe check well put that on a resume bc you are impressive

yes she's a gift giver

but i also think that she'd give you some...strange gifts

like you know those cats that bring like dead fish and mice back to their owners? yeah she'd probably do the same honestly...

hopefully not with mice corpses and whatnot

dont worry, she can magic them out of existence if you wish

just like she can to anyone who wrongs you-

shes the best though honestly, very supportive

bonus points if you join in and riff off her robot lingo though that'd honestly be green flag, marriage behaviour (maybe not that last bit but yk)

you probably encourage lyney to deep dive into his antics, much to lynette's fustration

she now babysits not one, two but three toddlers full time

but you probably also bring freminet out of his shell

she loves you for that so you're forgiven

the type to relentlessly tickle you

doesnt take anything serious but takes pillow fights seriously when it counts

she loves dessert and tea a bit more than you

sorry

but she's happy to share <3

FREMINET

quality time, gift giving

oh my god words cannot describe how excited i am for this particular hc

so yeah, he has a voiceline about making penguins for kids

PEOPLE HED MAKE YOU LITTLE PENGUINS

totally gonna make your penguin twin with Pers tho

god thats so cute whys the standard so high

also he's another not-expressive-with-words person so uh, yeah expect muchas time spent together (or not...bc he's always deep sea diving) either way! it's always quality

he is (very obviously) insecure so give him plently of love and affection (or ELSE-)

im still crying over matching penguins, is that juts me

he'd fix your broken machines for you as a love language

bonus points if you like, can, or want to learn how diving tho it's probably a double edged sword right, bc like, on one hand yall can hang out underwater and who needs aquarium dates when you can BE in the sea

but on the other hand, you now have access to his vulnerable and safe space

yeah you better treat him right or else

he'd probably get carried away with his mechanical stuff and make you a crap ton of toys

maybe not the cuddly kind either so js be prepared for that

god hes such a bean tho

an anxiety bean

btw, he very much believes in fairy tales and what not, so do us all a favour and believe in the magic with him

OR ELSE

ik i say that a lot

i feel like-

i dont actually know i forgot, someone messaged me and i lost my train of thought

ANYWAYS

just freminet being the softest, cutest boy

[bueckersfudd]

You don’t watch defense?? I love watching Paige play D, I think she reads the game well on that side of the floor as well lol

I think Sonia usually averages an efficient 14 PPG? Paige held her to 7 points on 4/10 shooting I believe.

I’m tied of teams face guarding P. I need the ball in her hands at all times and it’s so sad that that’s just never gonna happen. I do remember Paige having the ball more when Azzi was playing though? But idk, with Shade being off today and Sarah in foul trouble, we didn’t really have another bucket better for us.

let me clarify: i looked away when nd had the ball bc they were pissing me OFF. luxury of watching on tv; u look away and it doesnt exist. i couldn't tell u who was guarding who bc i was that annoyed that we couldn't REBOUND THE BALL.

paige is a great defender but i do think she overhelps sometimes which if u dig deeper just shows she doesn't quite trust her teammates yet (can u blame her)

anyways i also weirdly agree that she seemed to take over more when azzi was in, (kinda think she was just desperate for azzi to hit some open looks but I DIGRESS) altogether the lack of offense is what will kill us in march if it doesn't change. ALSO, with offense comes the necessity for defense; we can't have players on the floor who can shoot but let the other team score the second they have the ball @ QADENCE SAMUELS but whatever hopefully by march they figure some of this shit out bc in my drunk state it feels very um bad

[chronologicalhomestuck]

karkat pov liveblog: hivebent, part 1

we begin in a lab on a meteor in the furthest ring.

computer enhance.

look at all those little goobers! i am not replaying this whole flash just for this moment but in lieu of that, here's hussie's commentary on the scene from the book, just for a bit of spice.

as far as i can tell, karkat's first chronological appearance in hivebent is 2177.

vriska has just jumped tavros off a cliff, and he chooses to message karkat about it. im not sure what he hoped to get out of this since karkats only reply is characteristically snappy.

we then jump to 2025. karkat is messing around with some .~ATH files. in the middle of examining the mobius double reacharound virus (titled check_thii2_2hiit_out.~ATH), he gets trolled by its author. hello sollux.

CG: SO YOU MADE THIS GAME? TA: no no. TA: more liike ii adapted iit. CG: FROM WHAT. TA: 2ome crazy technology AA dug out of 2ome ruiin2. TA: havent you talked two her about iit? CG: MAN, NO. CG: I CAN'T TALK TO HER, SHE'S SO SPOOKY.

we start talking about the game that will take up the rest of karkats story, and get a hint about this mysterious "AA."

he then hears crabdad complaining, and chooses to put this off...long enough to introduce himself, i guess.

karkat's introduction is 1992, written in a way directly referencing john's introduction.

Earth, also for convenient reference, is a planet that does not yet exist.

see how we are doing this? logical! earth doesnt exist yet, so of course we arent starting with the humans!

homestuck does not want me to read it chronologically. it is doing everything possible to stop me from reading it chronologically.

This game, for convenient reference, is a game that DOES NOT YET EXIST.

please. please let me obey chronology.

Later on, you would swap your modus with your hacker friend, a guy who unlike you happens to be competent with programming. It would only make sense.

i thought i would embark on this quest and find its purpose along my way. that purpose, it seems so far, is to acknowledge just how stupid this chronology is.

It is your sixth wriggling day, and as with all five preceding it blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

yeah i was about to say something like that. that being that i wont have much to say so long as the plot remains linear.

It figures that installing this new beta chat client would open the floodgates

i always forget that trollian was brand new when hivebent starts. i wonder what they used to message each other before then?

speaking of which, his first pesterlog after his introduction is page 2010, with gamzee. its kinda sad how mean karkat is to a lot of his friends tbh.

TC: iSn'T sOmEtHiNg BiG aLl GoInG dOwN? CG: WHAT? TC: i HeArD sOmEtHiNg bIg WaS gOiNg AlL dOwN. TC: JuSt AlL bE tElLiNg Me AlL wHaT mOtHeRfUcKiN iT's Up AnD aLl AbOuT. CG: STOP SAYING ALL. ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT TA'S THING? TC: yEaH!! fUcK yEaH mAn, So MyStErIoUs. TC: I'm NeVeR bEiNg GeTtInG cEaSeD tO bE aMaZeD bY aLl ThEsE fUcKiN mYsTeRiEs LiFe'S gOt FoR uS. CG: UUUUUUGH. CG: ANYWAY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S UP WITH THAT. CG: MAYBE I'LL TALK TO HIM TONIGHT ABOUT IT. MAYBE I WON'T. CG: IT'S PROBABLY JUST ANOTHER ONE OF HIS PROJECTS THAT WINDS UP BEING COMPLETELY USELESS AND A HUGE WASTE OF MY TIME.

(apologies if the text is hard to read on dark mode. i use cyber theme myself and cant see a word gamzee says here)

according to the pov cam, the next page karkat is on chronologically is 2058. the great team divide / team leader argument of hivebent has officially begun, with karkat and terezi. and in the end, it wont even matter at all. lmao.

CG: OK WELL CG: SPEAKING OF THAT CG: I SHOULD GO DOWNSTAIRS AND DEAL WITH THIS GRUMPY CUSTOMER. CG: IT'S GOING TO FONDLE MAJOR SEEDFLAP, BUT HOPEFULLY IT'LL BE QUICK. CG: YOU CAN ESTABLISH YOUR CONNECTION AND DO YOUR TRIVIAL SIDEKICK STUFF I GUESS IN THE MEANTIME. GC: OK! >:D

and apparently karkat intends to deal with his quite grumpy crabdad at the end of this conversation.

but then his computer explodes.

interesting. sburb equipment already? i suppose he was right:

CG: TEREZI AND I HAVE ALREADY ESTABLISHED A CONNECTION AND WE ARE MAKING GREAT PROGRESS HERE. CG: WE ARE A GREAT TEAM, AND I AM A FANTASTIC LEADER.

welp. guess he didnt have to deal with him after all. although the drawing on the fridge is very cute.

terezi has continued to make progress on his hive...

and he gets his new weapon...

only to find his toilet detached from its fixings.

GC: 1M YOUR S3RV3R PL4Y3R SO PR1OR1TY H4S TO B3 ON M3 G3TT1NG 1N TH3 G4M3 GC: B3FOR3 1 G3T K1LL3D BY M3T3ORS GC: 1N WH1CH C4S3 YOUD B3 SCR3W3D 1N TH3R3 GC: TH3N TH3 N3XT GUY COM3S 1N, TH3N TH3 N3XT GC: 4ND YOU BR1NG TH3 L4ST ON3 1N CG: WHOA WAIT, WHAT? CG: METEORS? CG: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. CG: WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH METEORS. GC: OH BOY YOU N33D TO G3T W1TH TH3 PROGR4M K4RK4T

karkat, i think you are a bit behind on what this game is going to be like. yet you are already on your planet despite that!

i gotta go now but ill be back

[smashwolfen]

Eyyo, it's WIP Wednesday and I actually have something in the works I would like to share!

More so to see if I can actually do it but also to get practice with my nice new ink brush thing I bought the other day. There is a, hurdle, in obtaining the good Legends Arceus cards, as some of them in particular are uhhhhh... unfortunately VERY pricey for even most folks to consider buying one card a good idea coughcough SneaslerV alt art, pearl clan with ingo card, Iridas full art coughcough Or even just a card for a character doesn't exist yet!!

So I decided if I want something badly enough, I'll just, make my own unique cards!

So far the VERY rough prep and idea work on normal paper for 2 folks who DESPERATELY deserve their own full art cards.

Laventon has his own normal looking trainer card, but thats it for him. He doesnt even get new art for it either it's just the one from his release! If he had a full art card it would very much have to include the three P's. His Pokemon, Pokedex, and Potato Mochi!

Then the one I really wanted to do from the start when I had this idea a while ago, good ol' Warden Ingo, well before his appearance in V Star Universe with the Pearl Clan was shown. He may not be doing his signature pose, but he's with his Lady Sneasler doing Warden things.

Nothing exceedingly extravagant, but more so to see if I can go through and complete my ideas. These 2 will be on normal paper for now as practice with using my brush to line tiny details, and once done I'll pencil crayon them in with the colours I plan to use for my tried and true cards in the end, which will be watercoloured! That way I have a better visual for what I want the watercolours to be like!

So far my lining has been rather consistent in my first solid testing!

I decided to do my Legends OC Akiko as my first prototype card with the inking! The only thing I didn't use my brush pen for was the writing for the pokedex and the framing of the inside portion of the box, which I used a 0.05mm pen for, but literally everything else was with one tool! Along with Akikos card, I'm gonna do this tealish colour for the border of the others cards, since I used the similar colour to the "Legends" text on the title card for Legends arceus. Along with the border, im also making my own special backing of the cards im doing!

Instead of the good ol' swooshy blue backing with the cracked open pokeball we see in every card since the dawn of the TCG, these are gonna a have a Hisuian pokeball, calmly sitting in the grass with Mount Coronet in the distance! With a stylized "Pokemon" to go with it! And each back will inevitably be hand drawn!

To get an idea of why I want so much prep and practice done beforehand to the main watercoloured cards, I'm doing them to scale

They are all going to be made to be the size of the real cards themselves. Practice ones too! I gotta get good with a steady hand!! So many tiny details, so many thin lines, SO MANY WAYS TO MESS UP AND WORRY!!!

BUT

Like I said, if I want a card badly enough, I'll just make it myself! XD

Hopefully you'll all like the end results of my agonies, our boys need cards of their own, even if they're just gonna be for me XD

[titanfall-moddy]

Huge Update

XO25_reworkFor_NSP

Goal: Rework Northstar Prime Titan to sound and behave more like Mihaly and the XO25f from Ace Combat 7

Tasks

1.Change offensive ability from Cluster Rocket to Multi-Target Rocket Core.

2. Create two new skins for NSP. Draw color palett inspo from XO25 Erusian fighters from AC7.

Skin 1 will be sleek and and clean. Mostly black with white and orange accents.

Skin 2 will be more weathered and beat up

3. Fix voiceline Mod

4. Change hud look to resemble AC7 hud. Main changes will include - changes to missile lock crosshairs - changes to taget acquisition crosshairs. Square = titan/vehicles. Octagon = pilot/grunt - change color scheme to green/red depending on situation - add elevation meter, maybe even double hover height, just for fun. kinda broken but whatever.

Lessons learned so far.

T1. Changing the offensive ability is actually really easy. all you have to do is go to /scripts/weapons/wpn_name and swap "shoulder" for "dumbfire" between the two files. While simple, bear in mind that the game will crash if player has not deselected both "Enhanced Payload" - Northstar "Multi-Target Rocket Core" - Monarch

from their Titan Kit. Having either ability selected will cause a crash on Titan spawn.

T2. Getting models into blender and editing them is simple enough through either the VPK tool or Legion+, however the real trick right now is getting them back into the game files in an edited/acceptable state. T3. I learned that nearly all audio for the voiceline mod (especially the viocelines) needs to be on Channel 2, otherwise called stereo. this mean that when you're looking at your audio file in whatever program you're using, there should be two audio waves right on top of each other that are identical. You must almost make sure that there is no meta data in the file, and that it's exported at 48K hz otherwise the game will not play the sound correctly.

Another note, it does not matter what you name the audio file so long as it goes into the proper folder, although giving it a similar name does help with organization.

T4. Changing the crosshair is probably the easiest thing to do in the game files. They're always in weapon .txt files and always at the very bottom. Also, there are plenty of lists online that have all the crosshair names so you don't even have to guess which ones are which or go sleuthing through the game files. I was able to change the mutli-lock crosshair to the smart-pistol reticle easy enough but struggled in getting the target- acquisition marker to show up even though it's coded into the multi-lock file. Weird, I know.

NEXT STEPS:

T1. Figure out whether or not it will be easier to add an entirely new titan via copy/pasting asssets and changing the names, or if I should change all existing assets for the game to XO25. In my brain the latter would be the easiest as there's some background stuff I won't have to change in order for the game to still function properly. However…

T2. My guess is that the easiest way to go about changing the skins is to edit the base model titan and then replace the existing model with my own. That way the edited version is the default skin in-game. However…

T3. I do not know why the mod isn't working anymore. Changing the vpk files shouldn't have affected it at all. I must figure out what's causing the issue. I've boiled it down to three guesses. 1. It's my computer, it just doesnt like or doesn't want to cooperate. 2. There's something actually wrong with the mod, i.e. it's not using the right dependency or something 3. somehow. palpatine returned.

T4. Changing crosshairs is very easy, thankfully. Getting crosshairs to behave is somehow another task entirely since I don't fully understand the games language/structure yet. For this, I need to get a hold of the Ace Combat game files and to be honest I haven't even begun to look into that yet. Hopefully it won't be too much of a hassle to import the assest into the game since they've both been out forever. I'd also like to take this time to stop myself before I add another task onto my already full plate. However…

11/7/2023