#hopefully it won't take another two months to finish that ;)

[figmentforms]

Part 247 of  “A Tale of Two Rulers” (Jan 24, 2024)

I managed to finish something!!! ᕙ(⊙ᴗ⊙')ᕗ

Thank yo all so much for your usual patience and kindness! Next update will be in about two months. Hopefully sooner.

I won't be able to go do conventions for a while since getting sick right now would be very very very bad timing with my medical situation, so I took on a big commission and a kickstarter to supplement my income a bit, so that will slow me down. If you happen to like Mothman or/or ita bags, you may like the upcoming KS. I will make a post when it's ready, but I promise I won't spam about it.

(Also, comic will be looking a little different like this from now on because my old set up broke and i had to switch to another one. ^_^')

★ Webtoon-  https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/a-tale-of-two-rulers/list?title_no=292453 ★ - I’m still building up this archive.

★Patreon- https://www.patreon.com/LorIllustration ★

★Store - www.etsy.com/shop/FigmentForms

for those that wonder how the medical stuff is going, I'll put that below the cut so anyone who doesn't want to see it can skip it easier:

Yay for not having cancer! A nice relief there! I'm now taking the various medications required to start my first embryo transfer. I'm really excited but also nervous. It will happen in just a few weeks and i'm really praying that the lil' guy lives and gets to be born. lol, now to enjoy the impossible task of trying to NOT be STRESSED as HARD AS I CAN.

[silliest-sideblog]

Days since last anvil incident: 1 0

After seeing the art that @wasyago made for Tango for Hermit a day May, I really wanted to write a little something for it.

So here we have 500 words of Tango and his goofy little factory helpers!

Writing under the cut!

The factory hums around Tango as it steadily works in the background. He's gotten used to the noises around him by now, especially now that it actually has been working for a few months without a major hitch. 

Minecarts are rolling around, lights are blinking on and off, and Tango has to admit, this place might be a home? Well, maybe home isn't the right word. But it is done and he feels satisfied with it. Even if there still is a bit of stuff left to do. 

Like cleaning up. 

With all the recent finishing touches he's made to this place, the boxes have stacked up, and all the work outside, shaping the paths, has tracked enough dirt inside that Tango felt the need to finally fix his mess. 

One would think that this is what he invented the teknicians for, right? But if he left those guys alone with this, no work would get done, in the best case. In any worse case he'd have to reassemble them again after another anvil to the face incident. 

So instead, Tango is swiping up dust, mud and debris himself, two hands on the broom, his other two hands holding his pesky tail out of the way before it can absentmindedly swipe through one of the neat piles he's just made. All while making sure his little guys are actually helping. 

One definitely is, and Tango can't help but smile, always enjoying to see when his inventions actually work out, as he's carrying around some trash bags. 

Another one is currently trying to dust off a few boxes which is... Admittedly less helpful but it's got the spirit. 

Maybe this isn't going to take forever. He's been making good progress and one of the little guys is even helping with unpacking the non-trash boxes, carrying around items to his storage, even if he plays around with them for a bit first. 

With a smile and a small shake of his head, endeared by the teknicians, Tango keeps swiping until he sees something red being lifted out of one of the boxes. Oh no.

"No no no no no no no"

The broom is clattering to the floor as Tango sprints over, tackling the small robot away before he can actually light the TNT. Rolling over the floor, a safe distance away, Tango can catch his breath, picking the robot up by his neck like one might a cat. "No! Bad teknician!" Tango is aware of how exasperated he sounds. "How often do u have to say, no lighting shiny boom booms inside the factory?" 

With a sigh and a pat on the head he lets the guy down as he waddles off, hopefully doing something else now that won't give Tango another heart attack. 

Sitting on the floor for another moment, one hand in his lap, the other two propping him up, Tango allows himself a momentary break, going through his hair once with a free hand. 

His moment of peace is interrupted by another anvil falling down, dangerously close to where Tango is sitting, causing him to practically jump out of his skin and scatter away with a loud "Gah!" 

Looking up he saw another teknician, the one that presumably held an anvil a few seconds ago, fallen onto his face, struggling like a bug turned on its back. 

With a deep sigh, Tango gathers himself, and mildly regrets having made these little helpers so stinkingly adorable. 

[d3adbr3inc3lls]

Hi!! This one hits rather close to home and I wonder if you'd be willing to do Friede x reader after a particularly rough time when we weren't on the same page about relationship/lifestyle goals so we split for a few months but now trying to reconcile and get back together.

I understand if you prefer more light-hearted stuff. Just kind of hoping for a little pick-me-up if you could, thank you so very much. I rather like the way you write.

Friede x Reader | Different Lifestyles

When you were dating Friede, it was like a dream come true,

The two of you clicked like Legos- everything went smoothly.

But just like Legos, some pieces don't fit when you try to build with them, making you use cursed building techniques often frowned upon to make it work.

And just like some lego pieces, you wanted to settle down in one place whilst Friede wanted to continue his travels.

The two of you sat down to talk about it and what the future holds for the two of you.

But ultimately, the two of you agreed that it's to break best up. No matter what happens, one of you wouldn't be happy, so it was better to leave it on good terms rather than have a messy breakup.

In all honesty, you didn't think that you'd see eachother again, the two of you had really different paths.

So it suprised you to see him entering through the doors of your favourite cafes.

He ordered the same drink he always got when the two of you came. A regular coffee, no milk, no sugar.

As Friede pays for his drink he glances around, making sure that he won't get ambushed by an Explorer, an old habit that never seemed to fade, before his gaze settles on you sitting in your usual seat by the window.

Waving you down, Friede walks over with a slight bounce -if you can even call it that- in his step.

Cap is sitting on his shoulders with his signature -well- captain cap, before he jumps down to talk to your partner pokemon.

"Hey, it's been a while. How have you been?" Friede asks as he settles down in the seat opposite of you with a friendly smile.

You shrug looking down at your 'mons before replying, "I've been good," you decide to reply before glancing back up at him, "You?"

Friede nods as he takes a sip of his coffee, "I'm doing well myself. I finished my research not too long ago,"

You nod before the two of you fall into a comfortable silence with your 'mons chatting to eachother in the background.

"You still have my number, right?" Friede asks after a bit as you take a sip of your drink.

You never had the heart to delete his number.

Hesitantly nodding, Friede's gaze gains a new shine to it before he continues, "Great. There's a new bakery nearby and I was also wondering if you're free tomorrow afternoon. Maybe we could start over again, continue from where we left off at?"

Grabbing out your rotomphone, you check your calendar before replying with a simple, "I'm free," and he quickly messages you a time and place.

"Hopefully I'll see you there," he says followed by your name before getting up and patting his shoulder, indicating to Cap that they're leaving.

Before Friede leaves, he picks up his half-finished drink and slips the amount you paid for your drink before he walks over to the exit with a smile and wave.

--Alternate drabble

A/N: Loosely set after everything in HZ ends,, it didn't have the light-hearted mood, so I rewrote it to the fic above but I wanted to keep it

Friede's eyes scanned the room, a habit he had gained after Amethio had began to constantly attack him -another reason why you didn't want to stay.

It didn't take long for him to spot you next to the window where you always sat at, and it didn't help that his heart began to race, just like it would when he first met you.

"Mind if I sit here?" His voice cuts through your thoughts, making you look up at him from your drink.

Giving him a small nod, he sits down opposite of you before looking out the same window that the two of you would usually neglect on dates.

Meeting up with him felt bitter-sweet. What do you even say? Was there anything to say? Are the two of you ment to hate eachother now that you're no longer dating? That's what all people do.

"How have you been doing?"

"Good."

That sounded drier than you expected, so you decide to clear your throat before repeating yourself in a friendlier tone.

You could see the hopeful glint in his golden gaze, maybe. Maybe you could restore the relationship you once had.

"Look,-" Friede sighs, taking a small pause, "-I know that we broke up, but-" his fingers grip the paper cup "-I'm sorry."

Your eyes widen at the sudden apology and he looks away.

What was he even apologising for at this point,?

"I get it, you probably don't want anything to do with me anymore, but I'd love to give us another shot. I'm wiling to settle down for you."

Oh- OH.

--

A/N: I've never dated,,, but your situation sounds awful anon,,, I'm sorry to hear that happened,,,

[heavenescent]

⋆˚꩜｡ june: monthly goals & how to achieve them

summer is officially here. there's no more time anticipating the deadline of bikini/glow-up season, and it came a lot faster than you thought. personally, i just finished my first year of uni and it went by quicker than i would've ever expected! i took a week to relax, but now it's time to pick myself back up. here's my top 3 monthly goals for june & some tips:

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GOAL ONE: get back to the gym!

.ᐣ - what does this mean for me?

i've been recovering from some pretty bad hip, back, and knee injuries from a car crash a little over a year ago, but i'm cleared now to go back to the gym! my body is the weakest it's ever been right now, so i've been getting back into being active by taking outdoor walks, not too difficult hikes, and gentle bodyweight exercises when i have the time. even at the gym, i take things easy by going on the elliptical (mainly to alleviate pressure on my knee) and stick to cardio. once i get my new car in a week, i'm excited to have the freedom to go to the gym again! i'lll be sure to blog about my fitness journey too!

.ᐣ - what does this mean for you?

being disciplined does not mean that you need to be depriving yourself of care. it's so easy to get sucked into toxic motivation and put your all at first, and then lose momentum because you wasted all your energy in the first couple weeks, or even days. i know the advice "be realistic with your goals" is pretty overused, so i like to say, "be firm, but be kind." if your body can't take it, there is no shame in taking a step back. don't be ashamed to let yourself rest, especially when getting started, or starting again. routines should be built to last, and you should not feel like death when you have to stick to them. understand that struggling with change is one thing, but struggling to live in that change is another.

if you feel awful about missing out on getting the summer body for this season, don't fret. even if there isn't realistically enough time to reach your goals, getting started now will feel infinitely better than continuing to push it off. aim to get those 10k steps a day to the best of your efforts. exercising isn't just something that keeps you fit physically, but it truly keeps you fit mentally as well. if you've got a case of summertime sadness, try listening to music or an audiobook on a calm walk. if you can't walk outside or on a machine, just keep yourself on your feet or moving your hands. learning a skill is a great way to stay active, both with your body and your mind.

i'll hopefully be making a complete beginner's guide to the gym soon, because it truly is the best once you get over that initial anxiety. i'll also make a guide to exercising at home in various settings, either living with parents, in an apartment, or with other roommates.

GOAL TWO: cut down on mindless screen time!

.ᐣ - what does this mean for me?

i won't lie... i think i'm one of the worst people i know in regards to screen time and phone usage. and i am ASHAMED of that fact. i used to think phone addiction would never affect me, but i spend nearly every free moment i have on a screen, mindlessly scrolling or consuming brainless, meaningless content. when unpacking the things i brought home from my dorm, i noticed i had a serious problem when instead of putting on music like i would normally do, i struggled to find an enticing enough youtube video to put on in the background. i was subconsciously afraid of being left alone with my own thoughts; i needed something in the background to narrate a controlled train of thought for me on a predetermined topic. in short, not good. for this month, i want to be more mindful of the time i spend online. i started this blog primarily to deal with this issue, and to keep myself accountable by having a place to track my habits. i also just really enjoy journaling and writing, and having a blog is already so therapeutic. instead of doomscrolling, i'll find physical media to interact with, or find knowledge on attaining my aspirations.

.ᐣ - what does this mean for me?

everyone seems to be so attached to their phones, but the way you use your social media is different. you aren't just doomscrolling with no purpose, you're finding tips on improving yourself, or inspiration on new ways to upgrade your personal style. all of this is fine, but the key word in this monthly goal is mindless. if anything, the goal should read: be more mindful about your screen time. be aware that even consuming positive content, such as scrolling through #self improvement can still reach a point of overconsumption. so then, what does it mean to be mindful? well, i think it's a little different for everyone, as most things are.

on one hand of the extreme, no one should ever be spending more than 12 hours a day on social media. on the other hand, i understand why some people can't justify spending less than an hour being on their phone. lifestyles are just too different to be offered a one-size-fits-all solution. so, instead of giving my own unjustified advice, i'd like to recommend a book i read recently:

Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy Digital World by Cal Newport

to be blunt: this book was incredibly eye-opening, and provides so much more context and solutions to achieving a healthy, balanced relationship and life with your electronics than i can try to muster in one tumblr post. i really cannot recommend this book enough, especially for those of you angels that want to live more presently, without the shackles of algorithms fighting to keep your attention.

GOAL THREE: get closer to finding the real you!

.ᐣ - what does this mean for me?

this is the most abstract goal on this list, and quite fitting for the last of the three main goals of the month. in a world with so much emphasis on finding what makes you individually unique, yet also finding the group or label that fits with that individuality, i have struggled to find something that is truly, authentically myself. over the years, i've come to accept that all the past, present, and future versions of myself (or who i think myself to be) are all me. but even with this in mind, i can't help but feel something nagging deep inside my soul that knows i'm not being authentically true to myself. outside of all the trends and niches, who am i? another reason why i started this blog is to really explore the intricacies of my entire personality, both what i appreciate about myself and what i need to work on improving. i hope that being consistent in my blogging, reflecting, and interacting with others helps me see my genuine interests and characteristics in a relatively anonymous space. please perceive me!

.ᐣ what does this mean for you?

i don't feel all that qualified in giving real advice for this, since it is genuinely just the blind leading the blind here, but i will leave some questions/advice that have helped me be more introspective:

if you were to die tomorrow, what would you be most proud of? you can't be negative or self-deprecating, be genuine. what good have you left in the world? amongst your family and friends, who would remember the impact you have left, and what would they say about it? i promise that even if you think there's absolutely nothing, there is something. think hard, and be kind to yourself.

describe yourself in 3 words, now describe the 3 defining characteristics of what you aspire to be like. how much of an overlap is there? how do your current defining characteristics connect with your desired characteristics? make note of how similar or different they are, and regardless of which it is, find the similarities in them anyways.

look through some pictures of yourself throughout the years. what are the common themes between your past and current aesthetics? even if they seem like they couldn't be any more different, find at least one similarity. the similarity could very well just be that they're popular or trendy at the time. take note of these similarities, and reflect on what this means you're drawn to.

i know these questions all seem pretty different and quite random, but really reflect on all your answers. and i mean reflect. write it down on paper, think it through, jot down all the thoughts as you ponder over each answer. thinking it inside your brain and getting it all down on paper are completely different, and being able to visually see what troubles you grounds you enough to think everything through more. thoughts can very easily get muddled and jumbled up in your head. get them out and reflect on them for the month. no matter what conclusions you come to, use them for good.

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i'll be sure to figure out a way to improve this really blocky formatting, but thank you for reading! i wish you all the best of luck!

love, kate

[thatgayb1tchwhosimps4her]

Naked In New Orleans

Chapter 5 - Redemption + Correction.

Word Count: 1857.

CW: Mentions of Penelope being shot, mentions of pregnancy and potential termination (like once), small mention of puking in the first paragraph, Emily being the GOAT (+ no.1 Y/N-JJ shipper) part 2, I think that's it??

Summary: When Garcia gets shot, JJ calls reader; feelings are resolved and secrets are revealed.

A/N: There is a gap between the two chunks of writing I've done, bc I genuinely couldn't write anything else for this in the month between posting chapter 4 and this one, so it's just explaining away what goes on between it.

Sorry I couldn't do more - I really did try, and I feel like I'm letting myself + you guys down by not finishing it properly, but hopefully the next one will be better!!

~~~ Two Weeks Later

JJ's heart was beating out of her chest during her phone call with Hotch; Penelope had been shot. It made the bile rise to the back of her throat at the mere thought of it (though, it could be the bean-shaped secret she was keeping, making it worse).

The drive to the hospital was a blur, Hotch was already there, pacing the waiting room, and Emily arrived about twenty minutes later, which she was incredibly grateful for. After another three hours had passed, and Reid and Rossi arrived, there was still no word from the surgeon about how Garcia was doing (or about where the hell Morgan was for that matter), JJ couldn't take it anymore, and decided to step outside and call Y/N.

Sure, contacting the girl who's heart she shattered probably wasn't the wisest decision in the world, but JJ needed her; so call her she did.

'Voicemail, of course.' The blonde thought to herself, as the automated message on what to do next played in her ear, and she huffed slightly. "Hey, Y/N, it's me. Look, I know that I'm probably the last person you want to hear from, right now, but if you're listening to this and just deciding not to pick up, please hear me out. Garcia's in the hospital; she's been shot. I'm scared, and I really need you right now, so please can you get up here? I know that's insane of me to ask, and I understand if you don't, but if you do we don't have to talk about anything; I just can't do this alone. I made a mistake letting my fears drive a wedge between us, and I promise I won't let that happen again, if you decide to give me another chance. I love you, and I was afraid of that before, but I'm not, anymore. Just call me back, please? Bye." The liaison rambled.

"You love me?" A timid voice spoke from behind her, a couple minutes later, the previously subtle accent bleeding through more than it did before, causing JJ to spin around on her heels, and stand face-to-face with Y/N; a duffle bag slung over her right shoulder, cane in her left hand, and phone down by her side.

"Oh my God-" JJ muttered, going over to the detective, and wrapping both arms around her, hugging her tightly and burying her face in the crook of her neck.

"Hey, it's okay- I'm here; I'm listening." Y/N comforted, leaning her weight onto her good side, sliding her phone into her pocket, and hooking her right arm around the blonde's waist, as the bag fell down her arm, and onto the floor, while she sobbed into your neck. "Sh, sh, sh, sh, it's okay."

After a couple of minutes, JJ pulled back, and sniffed slightly, her eyebrows then knitting together after a bit. "How did you- Wh- Are you a teleporter, or something?"

"Emily called, about 3 hours ago. Told me to get my butt up here; that you'd need me." The other woman answered, moving to rest her hand on the girl's hip, making the liaison's stomach flutter at how close you were to her secret.

"Oh?" JJ said, swallowing some of her feelings, before fully processing your words. "Son of a bi- You know what? It doesn't matter, I'm just really glad that you're here."

"Yeah, me too. And I mean, I know everything ended badly, but it's only like a two and a half hour flight, so it's not really that big of a deal." Y/N responded, shrugging slightly.

"It's a big deal to me. I appreciate it; really, you have no idea." The blonde cut in, flashing her a small smile. "Come on, let's go inside."

Once they got back to the others, Morgan came rushing in around thirty minutes and a cup of decaf coffee later; panicked and explaining to them how he had his phone off because he was in church?? None of them had much time to dwell on that revelation, as the doctor came in mere moments after, telling them all that the surgery went well; they'd retrieved the bullet, and patched up a lot of the damage, the next 36 hours was just a case of wait-and-see.

A/N: Basically after this, obvs the team talk to Garcia, and figure out who shot her, which Y/N helps with (because Hotch gave her like special privileges to do so, like in chapter 3). Then Y/N goes to the BAU with Rossi, Hotch, and JJ, when Penelope's back at home with Emily, Morgan, an Reid, and talks with Hotch (scroll down to know why....), then JJ shoots the guy, which takes us up to this next bit :)

---

"Y'know, the last time I was in here, things got a little NC-17." Y/N joked, sitting down on the couch in JJ's office, after following her there once things were sorted in the bullpen, trying to make light of whatever situation was coming next.

"Yeah, well, I hate to disappoint, but that's not gonna happen." JJ replied flatly, moving to sit next to her.

"Hey, what's going on? I know we've not been on great terms the last couple months, and everything, but you can talk to me, you know?" The detective stated, running her thumb over the girl's knee.

"I'm pregnant." The blonde exclaimed rather bluntly, after a few beats of silence, opting to just getting this over with.

"Oh?" The other woman said, slightly taken aback, before questioning her softly. "How far along are you?"

"Um, 8 weeks 4 days." The liaison replied, mentally preparing herself for any backlash she might get.

"Oh." Was all Y/N said; 'While we weren't together, that's gotta be a bonus of some sort'.

"It, uh- It's Will's." JJ forced out, her face scrunching up a little, as she internally winced at how cruel this was.

"Oh-" The detective stammered after a little bit, her voice wavering slightly. "Wow, okay." She added, getting back up, and stopping halfway between the couch and the door, looking down at her feet.

"I know it's not gonna change anything, but I'm so so sorry. I don't know why I went there, or what I was thinking, but you have to believe me when I tell you I'd change it if I could." The blonde explained. "It was a mistake."

"So, what, you're just not gonna tell him?!" Y/N exclaimed, borderline shouting, as she spun around. "You can't have it both ways, Jennifer. You can't be gay when it suits you, and suddenly decide to be straight again when things get difficult." She added, no real hint of malice in her voice.

"I know that, but I don't want him." The liaison gritted out, her face a cross between pure anger and utter sadness. "I want you. Yes, I made a mistake by going to him, when I was upset about us not being an 'us' anymore, and I regret it wholeheartedly, but I'll also regret not telling you that I've fallen for you; hard. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but regardless of how this ends, I'm having this baby."

"I'm not telling you to get rid of it, but Jesus Christ, Jen- He's my brother. Yeah, I really don't like him, most of the time, but it's not like I can just never see him again, and just pretend that all of this isn't at least a little bit fucked up." The detective stated, shifting her weight to try and get comfortable standing.

"He already knows, Y/N! And he wants nothing to do with them, with either of us! Look, this isn't me being left with the 'second choice', or whatever, just please-" JJ started, before getting choked up, as her eyes got flooded with tears.

"Woah, hey; hang on-" Y/N said, immediately crouching in front of her, and resting a hand on her cheek. "It's alright, just breathe for me, JJ; I've got you."

JJ let out small, choked out sobs, as she tried to regain her breathing, and her shoulders shook slightly. "It's okay-" The other woman reassured, sitting back down next to her and rubbing her back, resting the blonde's right hand over her chest. "Just breathe for me, alright?"

"I'm sorry." The liaison sniffed, after a few minutes, curling into Y/N's side. "Just please, don't leave. I wanna fix this; I'll do anything."

"No, it's okay- I'm here." The detective comforted, holding JJ close to her, combing a hand through her blonde hair.

"I'm not gonna pick between you two- Or three. But as long as Will knows, and he's made his choice, as you said, then I'm gonna stick around." She stated, once a couple more minutes of sitting in a comfortable silence had passed.

"Yeah- Yeah, okay. And I totally get if you need to take a while to process everything, or something; I know it's a lot." JJ replied, resting her head against your collarbone.

"Nah, it's fine; already done." Y/N said, pressing a kiss to the crown of the blonde's head. "You know, I was talking to Hotch just now? Before everything went down."

"Oh? And why exactly would you be talking to my boss, after being here on the whim of my best friend getting shot?" She questioned, tilting her head to look up.

"I was curious about the profiling classes; how long it'd take to be one, and all that." The other woman replied, drawing patterns on the liaison's thigh with her finger.

"No way-" JJ spoke after a minute, turning her body to face you properly. "Wh- Wait, what about New Orleans, and the police department, your dad-?"

"I'm sure if he were still here he'd want me to be happy. Not chained to a desk, or Louisiana, for the rest of my life. Here, not just with you, but at the BAU, I feel like I could help make a real difference. You know, instead of just being "Bill's little girl"." She explained, watching the blonde's face beam softly.

"What happened to 'not knowing how I dealt with it all', during that abduction case?" She asked.

"Let's just say a phone call from a certain someone who broke my heart, changed my minds." Y/N joked slightly, watching as the liaison's smile be replaced with guilt.

"Hey, it's fine, honestly; I've dealt with worse. Plus, during said talk with boss-man, he said that because I've already had a lengthy-ish experience with the military, as well as the police department, I'd only need to read through a few textbooks for basic profiler things, and pass a couple tests, as well as retake a firearms qualification, to join the team as a trainee profiler."

"I think that's a very good idea- Not that I'm biased, or anything." The other girl spoke, grinning slightly. "Plus, 'Agent Lamontagne' has a pretty good ring to it."

"I love you, Jen." Y/N said, after a few more minutes, which made JJ smile.

"I- I love you, too." JJ exclaimed, her lips curling in an even bigger smile, before pressing them to the other woman's.

~~~

Taglist: @chestnutninny @severepeanutartisanhands @bluetreearbiter

~~~

Hi, so some of that last part in hindsight was probably a little biphobic, but as a bisexual person myself, I feel like it kinda made sense for the whole "heat of the moment" type thing, but I apologise if it came off differently.

Also, I have zero clue on how FBI things work, so the whole "Reader joining the team, after just doing a few tests" thing to do so is just me completely making it up, cause it was the easiest and quickest way I could think of to get that done between this chapter and chapter 6 :)

I hope you guys liked this.

-Harlow

[gloomysoup]

'tis the season

@steddiebingo christmas prompt: winter

rating: teen+ | word count: 1808 | tags: omegaverse, hurt/comfort, sick fic | ao3

another edition to home is where you are 🥰

Eddie Munson has always loved winter. He loves the snow, and hot chocolate, and lights, and Christmas. He loves curling up with a whole bundle of blankets to read a good book while snow falls outside. He loves catching snowflakes on his tongue and watching his breath fog up in the cold air. He loves kissing Steve under the mistletoe and dancing around the kitchen in their pajama pants and fuzzy socks.

What he doesn't love about the winter is sick pups.

The first time he and Steve deal with a sick pup is the first winter after Addie is born. It's mid-January, and their little girl is only four months old when she catches her first sickness. Steve and Eddie do not take it well.

Addie didn't sleep for days. She hardly wanted to nurse. She just cried and cried, and nothing could soothe her. They tried everything. They were both stressed out. Addie just kept getting worse.

Eddie got a call at work.

The baby was still crying, broken up by awful intermittent coughing, and Steve was freaking out.

“Something’s wrong,” he stuttered through his own tears. “I don't- I don't know exactly what, but- but I just know that something is wrong, and I don't know what to do.”

Eddie frowned. “What's going on?”

“She just- she has this cough that won't stop, and her breathing is all crackly, and- and she spiked a really high fever. 103.6 last time I checked it. She hasn't eaten since yesterday morning. Something is wrong, Eddie. I just know it.”

Eddie sucked in a breath and looked at the clock. He still had a couple hours left in his shift. “Okay. Okay, let's not panic.” Eddie was definitely panicking, but he couldn't let Steve know that. “Just- just take a breath, baby, okay? We’ll figure it out. Um… just keep watching her temperature and her breathing. We can take her to the doctor together when I get off. If she gets worse before that, though, call me and go to the ER. I'll meet you there as soon as I can.”

Steve hiccuped on a breath. “Okay. Okay, I can do that. I- I'm scared, Eddie.”

“I know, baby. We’re gonna do what we can, though. I love you.”

Steve sniffled. “Love you too.”

“I'll see you soon.”

Steve hummed and said goodbye before the line went dead. Eddie sucked in a shaky breath, scrubbing his oil-stained hands over his face. He had to get himself back together before he went back to the garage.

“What's up, man?” Dan asked when he finally stepped back in to finish working. “You look a little rough. Everything okay?”

Eddie sucked in another breath and picked up a new rag, sticking it through his belt loop as he tried to focus on work. “My pup's sick,” he explained. “That was my mate that just called. He, uh, he's kinda freakin’ out. She's just getting worse. Spiked a high fever today.”

Eddie couldn't see Dan’s frown with his head in the engine of a Cadillac. He could hear it in his voice when he spoke, though. “Damn. She's not very old, is she?”

Eddie shook his head. “Four months last week.”

Dan hummed, back to what he was doing. “Rough age for gettin’ sick, especially this time of year. Lots of stuff that's worse for the little ones. Y'know what she caught?”

“No, not a clue. Hopefully gonna get her in to see a doctor after my shift, though.”

“Better sooner than later, man. You don't wanna mess with that shit when they're that young. No immune system to help ‘em out. Somethin’ small can turn into somethin’ big real quick, man, trust me. My youngest caught a bad case of RSV when he was about seven months, and it ended with a two and a half day hospital stay.”

Eddie’s heart pounded in his chest. He really hoped it wasn't bad. He hoped she was going to be okay. His stomach kept churning. He couldn't get Dan’s words out his head, or the panic in Steve’s voice on the phone. He should have just told Steve to take her to the doctor without him. He shouldn't have made him wait. He knew Steve. He knew his mate was just going to keep worrying himself sick.

And then the phone rang again.

Jennifer, the older woman who ran the shop’s front desk and did all the behind the scenes work, answered. Eddie caught a glimpse of her through the window as she was immediately on her feet. His stomach dropped.

His entire world shifted on its axis when she stuck her head in the door and called Eddie’s name.

“You gotta go, sugar,” she said, as gentle and sweet as she always was. “Your ‘mega’s headed to the hospital with the pup.”

Eddie sucked in a breath and nodded, tossing his dirty rag down and following her inside the building. It took him barely a minute to sprint down the hall, grab his stuff from the break room, and sprint back outside to his car. He tried not to speed to the hospital, knowing Steve would be pissed if he spun out on the ice or got pulled over, but it was hard. He could barely focus. He whipped into the parking lot of Hawkins General, back tires barely catching traction on the slick asphalt. He hardly had the car in park and turned off before he was rushing through the Emergency Room doors.

It didn't take him long to find Steve and Addie, always able to pick out where they are in a crowd with ease. He rushed over to where Steve was running his hands through his hair, and a doctor was listening to Addie’s lungs.

“Steve,” he said, just as he got close to them. He instantly wrapped him up in his arms, both of them uncaring for the oil that would no doubt be staining Steve’s clothes. “‘M so sorry, baby,” he whispered, eyes on Addie as Steve burrowed his nose in Eddie’s neck. “What happened?”

“She- she could barely breathe,” Steve whispered, his voice cracked and broken with his tears. “She was coughing so- so much and couldn't catch her breath, and- and her fever just kept getting higher. I- I couldn't wait any longer.”

“Shhh, it's okay.” Eddie threaded his fingers through the hair at the back of Steve’s head, scratching at his scalp. “You did so good, baby. I'm so proud of you. The doctors are gonna help. They're gonna take care of her. She's gonna be okay.”

They would eventually find out that Addie had a severe case of RSV and pneumonia. They stayed in the hospital for five days while the doctors treated her, and even after they finally got to leave, it was another week of at-home breathing treatments. Eddie hated seeing his pup so sick, knowing there was nothing he could do.

Luckily, none of their other pups got quite that sick. They could get by with cuddles and Tylenol and all the other tips and tricks they got from the older parental figures in their lives. Joyce helped a lot with home treatments that wouldn't break the bank.

One particular winter, right before Sophia was born, the Munson household got hit hard. It was nothing more than a small virus, but the pups were all miserable with it. All they wanted to do was cuddle all day long and sleep. Eddie wasn't about to deny them whatever comfort they needed. With the big snowstorm that had blown through, he had two extra days off work. It wasn't ideal, but the garage’s owner had decided to close instead of letting any of them risk the drive. Eddie knew Steve was grateful for that; he always worries when Eddie has to be out in bad weather to get to work.

First thing that morning, as soon as the pups were sniffling and complaining, Eddie got everyone set up and comfortable in the big living room nest that he had helped Steve put together. Violet was immediately curled up next to Steve, resting her head on his swollen belly and closing her eyes. The rest of the pups cuddled in close, and Eddie kissed Steve’s forehead before going to the kitchen to make breakfast.

He made a whole platter of toast, scrambled eggs, and chopped fruit for the whole pack. He made sure everyone was fed and put on a movie. Then he settled into the nest with his family and cuddled them close. Grace and Lucy ended up in his lap, Grace against his chest and Lucy's head on his legs. James curled into his side, and Addie squished between him and Steve. They were barely twenty minutes into the movie when all the pups fell back asleep. Steve leaned his head over to rest on Eddie’s shoulder, despite the fact that it wasn't the easiest angle to get. Eddie kissed the top of his head.

“I love you,” he whispered.

Steve hummed contently, his own eyes starting to slip closed. “I love you too.”

Eddie smiled softly. “Y’know, I really hate when our pups don't feel good, but I can't say I'm upset that they just wanted to cuddle all day.”

He caught the edge of a sleepy smile on Steve’s face. “I know what you mean. Lately, it's like they don't want anything to do with me during the day. All they ever want is to know when you're coming home. Then they get sick, and all they want is to be held and cuddled.”

Eddie frowned slightly, picking up the hint of insecurity in his voice. “You know they love you, right? You're their mom, and an amazing mom at that. You do so much, taking such good care of them, and they will always love you. You know that, don't you?”

Steve sighed softly. “Of course I know that. They just want you because you're not the one here with them all day. Doesn't mean I don't miss all the early stage cuddles sometimes. They think they're gettin’ too big for that, especially Addie and Violet. And of course, Lucy wants to be just like her big sisters.”

Eddie pressed another kiss to his mate’s head. “They'll come back around eventually. Until then, we can just enjoy the time we have with the cuddles that they do want, even if they are all sick.”

Eddie still loves winter, despite how much he doesn't like seeing his pups sick. He and Steve will always take advantage of the extra cuddle time, though. Just another reason he loves the season. Any day, little Sophia would make her way into the world. Eddie couldn't wait to add one more to their pack, especially during his favorite time of the year.

[humansbgone]

Break week is over. I started the break week sooner than anticipated, so I'm ending it sooner too--back to the grind! The simplified model and shaders for the ant are done, as you can see here, so that I can run big crowd scenes of them without the laptop crashing.

As you may have seen, I'm streaming again at 2PM PDT today! Link below:

Currently I'm working on the ant's walk cycle. Next up, actually instancing the ants in crowds. Will have to do that a few different ways for a few different shots. Hopefully, that won't take longer than the weekend to finish up.

Then, as I promised myself, I'm going to pause on background and prop set-up to start blocking in animation. The idea is that aaall the prep work I put into the new rigging systems for the faces and walk cycles will have made this part much easier. But, because they're so new and prone to breaking, they might actually make it much harder. We'll see!

A month for blocking in animation, two weeks for finalizing backgrounds and props, and another month or two for finishing animation. That's the plan. We'll see how it goes. Until next time!

[sparklingcamelia]

"LOST SPARKS" - UPDATE + SNEAK-PEEK

Disclaimer: this is a post about things I wanted to say/write to give some more info about what's coming. It's not that much, though if you're intrested only in text of "Lost Sparks", it's at the end of the post!

Ok, so here's the thing: something is coming. And I think this is the point of no return. I made a commitment, so yeah...

A little (short) background of the events: out of nowhere I started thinking about writing fanfiction. It was quiet strange thought, but suddenly I was like: let's go.

Actually, now I'm thinking about it more and more as passion-fan-project and a creative exercise. You know - how far I can push the plot, make some unexpected (or expected) plot-twists, cliffhangers, create characters to play in some interesting storylines.

But over-all: I want to create interesting story.

I think some important points of this story you can find here.

But there's more, I promise.

I can't reveal many details/spoilers, but I can give you right now is the tittle: LOST SPARKS. I decided to leave it and I think I will stick with it. And as it suggests - LOST SPARKS - one of main themes will be about being lost: about life, choices, consequences, future, expectations, relationships, emotions and feelings. Of course, it won't be the main focus of the story, but I think it will be very important.

I also plan to write about themes like freedom, ambivalence, judgement, prejudice, injustice, discrimination, censorship.

And I'd like to take some of the characters and describe them in new way.

In some way I'm torn about this topic, but I have to admit that I want/need to introduce some original characters into the story, because I want them to fulfill some certain roles in the plot and I'm fully aware some people won't like this idea. I'm building whole lore/new universe for these protagonists, so maybe there will be some side-stories or spin-off, but now I'm not taking this idea for granted - I want to focus on the main plot.

As for the cast of the story - it's still work in porgress, but there's something I must confess: it will be mix of characters, events and anything beneath, because I like some certain things from every known universe. Why? Because I think it will be interesting mash-up. I don't know if it will work out, but hopefully, it will be good.

To be honest - I never thought I would be able to do so much in such short period of time. I've almost finished with drafting most of the chapters for part/season one. And I'm actively working on chapter 1 and 2, and I can assure you, they'll be long - chapter 0 is super long and will be available on Tumblr same day the first chapter of the series is posted on AO3.

I hope to publish it on late June/July.

I hope I will be able to give you some more informations about plot and characters very soon.

One last thing: I've been thinking a lot about this and I'm convinced that I might leave this blog as a place for sharing/reblogging great stuff, just because I really like things Ikeep finding, even if some blogs have been on hiatus/not updated for months/years.

BUT now you can find everything about things I'm currently working on HERE.

I will also publish latest updates there!!!

And I think, the most important part:

If you are here, so I serve you another sneak-peek. It includes two characters of the main cast: Nightbird and Rem.

‘Wakey, wakey, Nightingale.’

‘Oh.’ Nightbird sighed. Blinked. ‘Oh – It’s… Just you.’

Rem’s face hardened.

‘Just me. Your bestie. Your sister. Your navigator. Your partner in crime. Your –’

‘Ok, ok, sorry, don’t be mad,’ Nightbird chuckled. Her friend sighed and visibly relaxed.

‘I’m never angry with you, chillax,’ Rem sat down, next to her. ‘Hope you had a sweet dreams before “just me” came to wake you up.’

‘Yeah, it was –’ young mech hesitated. ‘It was nice.’

Just a dream. One of many.

Rem without waiting for permission took pad that was lying on her friend’s lap.

‘Of course,’ screen turned on and the latest drawing was displayed. ‘Dream about Cybertron will never die.’

Nightbird smiled with shyness.

‘It’s a nice drawing, though,’ Rem nodded in approval. ‘I hope we will be able to see this city, as we planned.’

Nightbird used an old photo as a reference. The drawing showed Iacon, the city where Mother and Father had studied. Although the city was amazing and had so much to offer, her Father often mentioned that he liked the climate of Kaon and Tarn better. He has always preferred more industrial views and technology-focused environments.

Before everything just collapsed.

It was obvious – even after Space Bridge was shut down, there still was hope.

‘Have you ever wondered if they think about us as much as we do about them?’ Rem turned her optics towards the sky. ‘Maybe someone is looking at the sky and is thinking about Ceall? About people they will never met? Places they will never see? Things they will never experience?’

Nightbird also looked towards the sky.

‘… yeah.’

To be continued...

If you want to read another sneak-peek, come here.

[adventuringblind]

Flowers in your throat

Lando Norris x Reader x Oscar Piastri

Genre: Angst

Summary: the problems of unrequited love

Warnings: hanahaki disease, blood, coughing

Notes: idk what this is... Does anybody wanna spam my inbox with things to write over break? Logan is on the list, but I'm blanking on ideas for the boy T_T

Masterlist

Flowers. Beautiful things that each have their own meanings. One that even color plays into.

Beautiful amd deadly things, these Flowers. She can't even stomache the sight of them anymore. Not when they are the source of her current misery.

A misery she has yet to understand. Is one not enough for her? Will Lando hate her for loving more then just him? Is she really that greedy?

Her driving had suffered because of her lack of focus. She's coughing over the radio now and her engineer has started to notice. Her trainer even more so with how sick she looks.

She doesn't want Lando to find her like this. Maybe she doesn't even like Oscar and this is because of the loving looks and gentle touch he's been sharing with her boyfriend. Is she jealous? In a way yes, but she wants that from both of them. She coughs up another petal at the thought.

Hopefully Lando isn't awake. She'd been on the floor of the Hilton bathroom for at least an hour now. Her mind running through all her options. How she might be able to fix this.

Death is the easiest option in the long run. The surgery would hurt Lando as she would struggle with any kind of love afterwards. Oscar loving her back is another, but again, how would Lando react?

She'd yet to even open up to him about the idea of polyamoury. To scared from past encounters and getting hurt. Easier just to ignore anything else. The words of her last partner rings through her ears. 'It's either one or the other' but never both. How can she have such a love for two people to the point it's killing her?

The door creaks open. She panics and tries to hide from Lando's worried gaze. He still ends up on the floor with her.

"Please talk to me."

"I can't. You're going to leave me."

"Whatever this is, we'll figure it out, okay? But we can't even begin to work on it if I have no idea what's going on." And he's right. For as chaotic as he is, Lando has always wanted to work through things together.

"I'm not - well - before I start I should say I love you dearly with every fiber of my being."

"Is this a break up?"

"No!" She shouts a little to loudly and quickly. Lando looks a bit startled but calms we he sees just how panicked she is. "I don't want us to break up - I just know that you won't want me anymore."

The thoughts of Lando leaving her flood her mind. Having to watch him and Oscar be teammates while she watches from afar. Her body wracks with coughs again as another petal comes up, pretty but splatters in red.

"Is that-?"

"Hanahaki, unrequited love."

"But I do love you so then..." He takes a moments to process. "It's not me is it?"

"My parents always told me my heart was to big." She inhales shakily. "It's Oscar."

"Since when? How long do we have before-" He doesn't finish the sentence.

"A have a few months left maximum. I'm already two months in."

"Silverstone."

"I'd already been fond of him before that but watching the two of you smile together like that." Tears slip past her eyes as she tries to stop the burning in her chest. "I'm so sorry and I understand if you leave. It's not like you signed up for this."

"I'm not leaving you. I don't care who else you love as long as I'm here with you. Plus, it's Oscar, I'd be lying if I said I don't have any feelings for him." Lando Admits with a shrug.

"Really?"

"I know you love me, too much, probably. If this is what loving you means then I'll be here every damn step."

She throws herself into Lando's arms, curling into the warmth of his body. And for the first time on two months, she cries in relief.

~~~~~

On the other side of things, Oscar isn't fairing any better. The constant scratch of his throat has started in August. Over the summer break when he had to bare witness to Lando and his girlfriends pictures.

He couldn't tell who he was more jealous of, or if he was jealous at all. Both, he was jealous of both because he wants to be with both of them. It's illogical, he thinks, that he should want two partners so desperately. They are committed to each other, why would they want him as well?

Lando is once again on the podium his female counterpart part there to congratulate him. Eyes shining as they smile at each other. The itch in his throat is to much. It burns in his chest as his lungs try to fight for air.

He runs back to the garage after getting weighed. Just in time to collapse onto the floor of his driver's room. Petals fall from his lips. Beautiful and soaking in red fluid.

He's still struggling to breathe when his door flys open. Logan amd Liam swim in his vision and ears. They drag him off the floor and get him upright again.

They clean him op and sit with him until Kim comes to get him for debrief. The older male looks horribly concerned. Lando also looks at him with something he can't pinpoint while sitting through the meeting. It's enough to make his chest burn again just knowing Lando is even looking at him.

Logan and Liam come knocking at his door that night. They want answers and rightfully so. He tells them, coughing on the bathroom floor while doing so.

"Have you talked to them?"

"No, why would they want me Lo?"

Liam hands him more water and pratically forces him to drink it. "Have you seen the way they look at you?"

And no, he hasn't, only how people say he himself looks helplessly in love.

How would they look at him now? In disgust? Maybe pity?

Shame he may never find out.

~~~~~

Another hard race. Las Vegas had messed them all up in some way shape or form. She couldn't breathe knowing Lando had crashed to hard. She coughed an entire petal up during the yellow flags just thinking about how he must be feeling.

She's been coughing up whole flowers recently. Tonight was no exception. Lando, despite being on heavy painkillers, was desperately trying to help her through a few larger ones.

She was barely eating anymore. Couldn't breathe. Her teammate had even noticed the drastic change in her appearance. Max and Christian had both been on her case. Third seemed so far away now as Lando tries to get water down her throat.

"I don't want you to die."

"And I don't want to live without love."

Lando manages to pull himself off the floor to answer the door. Mumbling about how it's probably Jon making sure he's alright.

She can hear the familiar voices of Oscar and Logan through the thin walls.

Oscar sounds rough. She blames it on the long race he had. He'd looked so tired coming out of the car, hands running through his hair.

Her lungs burn again. It's more so this time. Her entire body is on fire. She can't even cough properly and wails as she has to pull out whatever is in her throat.

A stem. One with thorns.

Lando is frantically pleading with Oscar and Logan for something. Oscar is also coughing. Enough that is worsens her own.

She coughs again. Another stem feels like it's tearing her open from the inside. She wails at the stinging pain. Panic overcomes her as it seems to never end.

The door swings open. Lando and Logan drag in a coughing Oscar.

He's in the same boat as her. He's been suffering this whole time.

"Logan who is it?! Please, I need to know." Lando is begging now. The sight of what's happening can't be helping his nerves.

"It's you two, both of you I think. He didn't say exactly."

She tunes out anything else. It's them. He is feeling this because of them. She coughs up the rest of the stem and the burning starts to fade.

But then the exhaustion hits. She wants to tell Oscar everything. Enough so he doesn't have to cough up thorns like herself.

She passes out before she can.

~~~~~

Oscar wakes up in bed. One that definitely isn't his own. He tries to sit up, but his body is depleted still. Noticeably, his lungs feel lighter then they have in months. The ache in his chest has lessened, but his love for the two is still there. If this isn't the work of a surgery then-

He sits up frantically, searching for something. Someone, more like. A hand on his shoulder pushes him back down.

"Relax, we're still here." It's Lando and his partner is on the other side of Oscar. She's dead asleep and rightfully so after what he witnessed her cough up.

"Where's Logan?"

"Asleep on the couch. He didn't want to leave you."

"And you - do you and her - are we?" His words are broken. He can't think properly.

"Caught feeling a while ago, mate. Her before I realized myself. She loves hard, enough to cough up flowers, apparently." Lando crawls into the space between Oscar and the female. Oscar, in his sleepy haze, latches onto Lando. He feels better being apart of whatever cuddle pile this is.

He falls back to sleep so easily. Only to be woken up later by a few frantic coughs. Lando is immediately trying to get the female out of bed and to the sink. She claims she's fine and it's confirmed by the lack of petals.

"It's from what the thorns did." Her voice sounds wrecked. Oscar tries to get up to help only to be pushed back again by Logan. Curse his exhaustion.

The American gets everyone water. Oscar is grateful for it as it soothes his still sore throat.

"So does this mean you three are going to be together then?" Logan raises an eyebrow.

"If either of them say no after this, I'm throwing hands. After the hell they've put me through I will force them to cuddle if need be."

[imagines-by-cleo]

Alright I’ll be adding another one to your numerous kaz requests😅can we get one where a female assassin (not Quiet lol) attempts to murder mgsv!Kaz and despite the hate he falls in love with her? I just thought the idea of Kaz having an ex assassin lover might be interesting.

and like everyone is saying…please take your time and don’t rush. Love your blog xoxo

~I'm back~ and omg I can't believe it took me until the new year to finish this. I've been writing this one bit by bit for the last couple months and I liked this prompt so much I'm almost sad to finish it. Thank you friend for thinking of this! Maybe I'll do a part two after I finish the rest of the requests and the few of my own I have in the works that should hopefully be out soon.

CW: SMUT, kinda dubcon, bondage, nipple play, teasing, fingering, orgasm denial, switch!Kaz, rough sex, unprotected sex, hair pulling

You gasped as another bucket full of freezing water was dumped over you, making you shudder and strain against the chains that held your arms above your head. Ready to shout another insult at the overdressed bastard that had been interrogating you until the swish of the sliding door echoed across the room and a stranger stepped in.

His presence held weight and his silence added to that, while you held your breath the only sound was the clanking of his cane on the metal floor slowly coming closer and closer.

"I tried everything, but unless you want me to seriously hurt her she's not gonna budge." The cowboy spoke, sounding just a little too excited as he hinted for permission to really get to work.

"That's not necessary." Kaz replied, sounding just the slightest bit defensive. "Let me talk to her. Alone."

"I don't think that's a good idea..."

"I don't care what you think." Kaz snapped back.

With a shrug the other man walked out of the room and you were left alone with your former target. If he wanted you dead it's likely he would have just killed you already, it was more possible that he wanted answers, secrets that you were in no position to be giving away. There was still a chance that you could save this mission from failure but if you cracked and gave away any information you would be dodging assassins better than yourself for the rest of your life.

He came closer in no hurry at all, clanking of his crutch hitting the metal floor echoed through the silent room like a doom drum. As he stood between you and the only light in the room he made a rather intimidating silhouette, towering over you in complete silence. Though you knew that his calm collected nature was just a ruse to put you in suspense you couldn't help but feel a little defeated as it was working.

"Let's start at the beginning." He said before starting his interrogation. "How did you get in?"

"Wouldn't you like to to know soldier boy?" You quipped, earning the smallest hint of a growl that he made quick work of silencing before he continued.

"Who do you work for?" He asked.

"You have a lot of enemies. Kaz." You teased, staring him down. "Just pick one to blame it on for now, it won't matter in the end."

"This doesn't have to be difficult." He stated, more reasonably than anyone who was almost murdered had a right to sound.

"Oh you haven't even seen difficult yet." You challenged, sounding more like a bratty child than a deadly assassin.

He quickly raised his hand, thinking he was going to hit you you flinched, not expecting to find him only reaching for the top button of your fatigues. It really did catch you off guard when he started to pop open each button slowly, one after the other until your whole front was undone and chest ready to be exposed by the slightest pull of the fabric.

Though the clothes still covered all that they were supposed to, the chilly wet fabric clinging tightly to your skin left little to the imagination. The sunglasses covering his eyes made it hard to tell where Kaz was looking yet you could still feel yourself shrinking under his gaze and fought your restraints with the urge to cover yourself.

Raising his hand to his mouth and biting down on the fingertip of his glove he pulled it off with his teeth then spit it onto the floor. He touched his bare hand to your neck, feeling how your breath was starting to quicken and more so when you knew he noticed, then pressing his thumb lightly over your windpipe he felt it stop. You found yourself wondering, doubting and then fearing again if a one handed man could even strangle you. Something in his firm grasp told you that he was ready to, and threatened, no, promised that he would.

His fingers moved, tracing your collar bone then stopping on the center of your chest, feeling your racing heartbeat for just a moment before slowly pulling one side of your shirt open. The touch of his hand on your skin felt both foreign and warm against your cold skin, even when he started to cup your uncovered breast it was difficult to reject.

"What are you doing?" You asked with an all too telling shake in your voice, receiving no answer from the man touching you.

You wanted to kick him away, spit at him maybe, call him a pervert or something worse, but the way he touched you was so meticulous and not at all a rushed taking of an opportunity. His touch was deliberate yet gentle, and the bitter scowl still stuck on his face told you that this wasn't for his enjoyment.

The cold water had already made your nipples stand out leaving them much easier to touch, he circled one with his thumb lightly toying with it and making you shudder. You did your best not to show a reaction and began to bite your lip in fear of making a noise as he continued to squeeze and massage the soft flesh in his grasp.

Soon his fingers started to wander lower, until they had reached a point that made you assess whether you should reject his touch or open up to it you found your body had already answered for you as your legs parted without any resistance. Truth be told there were certainly more horrible people to be captured by, even when you were looking at his file and saw the messy blonde hair and the mysterious shades you thought it would be a shame to kill him.

His fingers ran slowly up and down your slit, only brushing your clit with every other languid stroke. You could feel yourself getting wetter and eventually hear it too when you started to soak his fingers and make it easier for them to glide over your folds. When you rolled your hips forward to grind against his palm only finding he suddenly pulled his hand away, now you knew what his goal was.

"That's a dirty trick." You huffed, rubbing your thighs together though it was no substitute for his touch.

"Talk." He demanded, returning just one finger to rub little circles around your clit without ever really touching it.

"I can't." You growled in frustration. "They have other assassins ready to kill anyone that cracks."

His fingers moved down to circle your entrance, making you more and more desperate with each stroke. The satisfied look on his face as you got visibly closer to breaking was your only motivation to stay quiet. He leaned in close enough that you could feel his breath on your skin, the ghost of a touch of his lips on your ear seemed to hit every nerve in your body as he whispered.

"Are you sure you're so worried about that?" He asked, challenging the last bit of strength you had left.

One finger pressed in slowly, enough that you could savor the slight stretch which you couldn't tell whether it came from the thickness of the digit or how hard you had been clenching around it. Sliding in as deep as possible before curling, you moaned out loud as the feeling in the core grew more intense and demanded relief.

Kaz leaned in close until his lips where just ghosting over your own, you wanted to lean forward to kiss him but he was just out of reach. Still he lingered, tasting every breath growing deeper and faster while his fingers pumped in time. Just as you were sure you could cum all over his fingers he pulled his hand away.

"No, no, no, please!" You whimpered, trying to get his touch back before your release was lost.

"Tell me." He reiterated much to your frustration.

"It's XOF, okay? They sent me to kill you." You finally broke down and admitted not even caring about the consequences.

"What else do you know about them?" He continued.

"They don't tell me that much, probably in case I got captured, but they have more people they're gonna send if I don't come back."

"In that case we're gonna have to tighten up security around here..." His attention drifted off as he started to mentally plan.

"Did anyone ever tell you that you're a damn tease?" You jeered.

That seemed to be the only thing that broke his scowl as he let out a short laugh, he even seemed to stay amused as he turned and walked away. "Well if those assassins are only as skilled as you I guess we have nothing to worry about."

"Hey, where are you going?" You asked though you received no answer

Totally unbothered as he kept walking and not the slightest bit guilty for leaving you so desperately untouched as he entered the code and stepped out the door.

"Kaz, you can't leave me like this." You shouted after him shamelessly bargaining. "It's gotta be against the Geneva convention or something."

As as the door shut behind him and your begging shouts had turned into frustrated curses as you strained against your bonds. The room was left deadly silent making the sound of your pounding heart echo louder through your neglected body and you found yourself wishing that someone would have mercy and dump another bucket of cold water on you.

~

Ever since that day you had been working exclusively for the diamond dogs under the direct orders of Kazuhira Miller. Doing odd missions and assassinations that Big Boss was too busy to take care of, your most difficult mission so far was convincing everyone that you were no longer a threat, but for the most part you left that up to Kaz. Your loyalty lied only with him and for the worst reason, every day that you worked you counted yourself lucky that that no one else knew the truth or what your goals really were; although every once in a while you would get a knowing glance from that cowboy you met earlier.

Soon enough you had earned enough trust to have the privilege of a room of your own, it was hardly an upgrade from your cold cell but it at least had a proper bed, the only real problem was how empty it felt. The nights there were unbearable alone and you constantly found yourself tossing and turning with an insatiable need burning through your body. Your own touch was hardly enough to satisfy, even when you pretended your fingers were his while tracing all the places he had touched before.

One night you couldn't take it anymore, frustrated with the growing wetness between your thighs you ventured out to go find the relief you had been craving for far too long. Without even bothering to put on more than the t-shirt you slept in and a thin pair of panties you snuck out through the halls avoiding detection much like you would on a real mission.

Security had increased since you first infiltrated the base, but luckily for you not in the places it mattered. The routes patrol took were the same and the direction cameras were pointed never changed either, both faults practically inviting you into Kaz's quarters.

He wasn't a very sound sleeper, just like the first time you saw him he was tossing and turning in a fight with his own dreams before he even woke to notice an intruder. Quietly and carefully you crept onto his bed watching him twitch and mumble for a moment before you crawled over and straddled him, pushing the sweat dampened hair back from his forehead you noticed his breathing start to steady as his eyes fluttered open.

The peace didn't last long however, when he woke up enough to realize there was someone else in the room his expression changed to pure rage. His hand flew to your throat squeezing tight even after he recognized you almost as if you were the nightmare he had been fighting with. Only gently setting a hand on his arm while trying not to give in to your instinct to fight back, eventually his grip relaxed though he didn't let go of your neck.

"Trying to kill me again?" He questioned, baring his teeth.

"No." You answered simply, a blush crept onto you face along with a hint of a nervous smile.

Kaz was about to say something else, most likely a follow up question until he felt the answer in your fingertips creeping along the waistband of his boxers. He was stunned at the boldness of your touch, giving you the opportunity to grab his wrist and pin it to his side.

"You never told me how you got in here." He confidantly remarked, as if he was still in control.

"The same way I got in last time." You answered proudly. "And you didn't even bother to lock the door this time."

Noticing the hint of a smirk on his face you could almost assume that he knew, even as you felt him strain in your grasp but never really fight against it made you think this vulnerability was just an act or more likely a trap. Suspicious as his behavior was you couldn't help but take the opportunity before you, hooking your finger on his boxers waistband and slowly pulling them down.

With a few light strokes you soon felt his cock stiffen up in your grasp then once it was nice and hard you gripped tighter and pumped a little faster. Watching his chest rise and fall as his breathing grew deeper you were hoping to get something like a whimper or maybe you could even get him beg and look as pathetic as you must have when he was teasing you.

The idea swirled in your head as you softened your grip and slowed down until you were only giving him short lazy strokes. Kaz let out a deep frustrated groan, while it wasn't what you were hoping for it was a start. He opened his eyes to see you staring down at him with sadistic intentions then gave you a defiant smile while shaking his head.

Pouting at his reaction you became even more determined to get him to crack, with only your thumb and your forefinger you continued to work his shaft until you could practically hear him grinding his teeth. He had almost wiggled his wrist out of your grasp but you kept a firm hold on him.

After deciding you had enough of teasing him you let go and moved up to hover your hips just above his, though he tried to hide it his twitching and squirming gave him away. Your mouth watered at the sight of Kaz held down panting with his swollen leaking cock out and proud just waiting for you to touch it while the growing ache between your own legs was getting too much to ignore

Too impatient to even take them completely off you simpliy slid your panties to the side before straddling him and lowering down, taking a minute roll your hips and drag his tip across your slit and feel it twitch while you soaked his cock. He let out the most delicious gasp when you slammed down on him and took the entire length with little resistance, for a moment you stayed there just savoring the feeling that was so much better than you had imagined in the long lonely nights.

The small victory wasn't yours to enjoy for very long, you held still long enough to feel him writhe impatiently and try to raise his hips in protest, you kept your resolve and only lifted slowly off of him then lowered back down taking just one inch at a time. Kaz groweld at first, then he sighed, then he whined. It was just like how you were when he left literally hanging in that cold cell, maybe even worse. The idea of that revenge made you dizzy with the promise of relief like you had been wanting, and you found yourself feeling just merciful enough to use him to get it.

Squeezing around him and making him moan without any hint of shame, his wrist went limp in your grasp and he relaxed and allowed you to continue your sweet torture. It did feel like a victory to render him as helpless as he was beneath you, even the idea of it made you wetter than you thought possible and the sight of it made you shudder. In that moment you needed release more than you needed revenge, the bitterness you felt toward him slipped further away every time you sunk down on his cock.

Your hips were moving on their own at that point, it was hard to tell who was getting more pleasure out of it all you knew was that you were getting so close to that sweet relief you had needed since he first touched you. Reminded of that night you had the idea of bringing his hand up to your chest, having him touch you like only he could.

As soon as you released his wrist his hand flew to your thigh grabbing tight and using it as leverage to throw you off onto your back, already stunned at being tossed off like that you never expected him to flip you again before climbing over and using his weight to keep you pinned down with a hand on the back of your neck.

"Fuck! Not again." You groaned, feeling your release slipping away.

His fingers twisted into your hair while he pushed your face into the pillow, the way he held you down made nearly impossible to even shift your weight let alone break free. Although his still hard cock rubbing against you from behind curbed your want to escape.

He laughed as you tried to wiggle yourself out to no avail. "I expect better from my best assassin, I should teach you a lesson."

Fighting his grasp just enough to turn your head for a moment to ask while sliding your panties down and coyly grinding against him. "Would you call this a lesson, or maybe a punishment?"

"A mission, now shut up and take it." He answered bluntly before forcing your head back into the pillow.

The first thrust buried his entire length deeper than it had gone before, without even realizing it you were whimpering helplessly while he pulled out to the tip and repeated the action again. Over and over the cycle continued of him leaving you nearly empty just to plunge in even deeper and quicker.

It was almost too much but you were so afraid of him stopping and not letting you finish that you spread your legs farther and took even more. Your cheeks grew red in pure embarrassment as you lost all control over the noises coming from your mouth, more so when Kaz pulled your head back by the hair and forced you to cry out in the open.

"C'mon, let everyone know who you're loyal to now." He demanded, twisting your hair and earning another scream.

He was so cruel, but honestly that was what you wanted, the violence, the insults, the brutal manhandling, all of it. Ever since that day you were wishing he would just pound you like this, all the while giving you that blood chilling scowl.

That feeling of reaching your peak came creeping up through your body again, and with it a fear that you would be denied release. You arched your back and bucked your hips in rhythm with his trying to take in as much of him as you possibly could while fully expecting him to chastise you for being so desperate.

"Don't... Don't make me beg for it again." You panted out, lifting up and pressing your back to his chest.

He snorted at your request. "You're so lucky I'm bored of teasing you."

Having him so close while you came made the sensation so much more intense, feeling his breathing get deeper while he pounded even harder and pulled your hair even tighter. He tugged your head to the side so he could put his mouth on your neck and practically taste every moan that flowed out, his lips felt scorching on your already burning skin consuming you completely in a wildfire of passion.

Kaz pulled out and turned you over while your legs were still twitching, before he could even push back in you caught a glance through the glaze in your eyes and saw the first spurts of cum dripping out of his cock. He shut his eyes and bared his teeth while he continued to roll his hips forward, letting out long low groan and gripping your thigh tight. The feeling of him twitching inside while he while he filled you up was just too much for your sore overstretched hole, but the lingering need to keep him close kept you from telling him to stop and instead making you wrap your legs around his waist.

Spent, exhausted and finally finished he dropped down, his face only a few inches away from your own. Your breath mixed and your eyes locked in a moment of honest exposure, the bitterness and tension being released finally allowed the two of you to really see each other for a brief moment.

He didn't hold back at all, touching and kissing you wildly wherever he pleased while you were still shivering and giving you all the contact you had been begging for all this time. While you were a little taken aback by his treatment you readily accepted and even returned the affection where you could.

"Do you know how bad I wanted to do this while you were all tied up in there?" He revealed through heavy breaths.

Even his affection was violent. Kisses from a man who forgot any other way to be intimate could nearly drown you in wave after brutal wave, but you wouldn't just survive without returning in kind. Not simply allowing Kaz to take over your body, you savagely took his as well. Becoming nothing more than a tangled mess of tongues and teeth, hands grabbing and pulling desparately whether they landed on hair or skin.

In one of the rare instances when your lips had to part for oxygen you took the opportunity to say. "Kaz. Don't take this the wrong way but, I'm so glad I came to kill you."

"There's no right way for you to take this but, I'm glad you're bad at your job." He replied with a grin.

With the slightest urge to prove him wrong right there you laughed and kissed him again. For the rest of the night it continued like that, with the two of you sharing banter while holding each other close. The end of the agonizingly tense relationship you previously had sparked the begining of something that would be a challenge to explain if anyone on base found out. If they found out.

[twink-lesbian]

EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS

If you can't pay for commissions, even just a reblog counts! I'm also taking donations, any bit helps right now.

I'll spare explaining my situation for the end of the post under a "read more" section, so let's get to commission info!

Prices are based on vibes, I haven't come up with a for certain system for pricing right now. So, with that said, prices are very much negotiable! We can def work something out in your price range, so if these prices don't quite work, feel free to message and ask!

No limit in available comm slots, so no worries, just message me and we'll talk about it!

Here's some examples and a price estimation for each!

The process in steps will go like this:

We chat about what you want and work out pricing

I get half the payment up front through PayPal for your sake of buyer's protection

I finish the sketch, send it to you for approval

I finish the line art, send it to you for approval

I finish coloring, send it to you for approval

I finish shading and send you the final result when I get the rest of the payment!

If you only request basic colors no shading, a sketch, etc, then obviously I won't be going on with any steps further than that, but will still get a confirmation of your satisfaction. If you're not satisfied with anything I send for approval, then feel free to speak up and I will make the requested changes for it! Each "example" will have a big watermark on it, but the final result will not, so don't fret about the text in the way of the progress pics!

Below the cut is an explanation of my situation if that may help any at all:

I am a physically disabled nonbinary individual and experiencing (hopefully) temporary mental disability from severe mold toxicity, and my partner is a transfem individual herself.

We are currently experiencing a housing crisis due to unexpected circumstances that came up very last minute.

A year ago I had to move states from somewhere in the Bible Belt to somewhere much safer up north to a very blue state. A month after I moved, the job I had lined up to get settled here ended up having to let me go because of their own financial struggles. I could not get another job due to my physical disability finally catching up to me. My partner has struggled to find a solid job, and right as we hit $0 in their bank account from struggles, they landed a job. However, that was only two months ago, so we've been battling with catching up financially.

However, the apartment I am living in has mold and has HAD mold in the AC unit and in the walls of the external closet the HVAC unit is kept in with a vent that airs directly into my bedroom, so I get double blasted with the spores circulating through our air ducts and from the direct vent open to the air duct in that closet, and it has remained unrepaired for the entire year of living here due to the building maintenance's neglect, so I have been experiencing worsening neurological symptoms impairing motor functions, speech, memory, cognitive, and emotional abilities as well as some concerning physical impairments such as vision loss, chronic pain, bleeding disorder related symptoms, and worsening chronic pain on top of my existing chronic pain. A physical therapy appointment yesterday confirmed that I officially have medical agreement that I have graduated from needing a cane to needing a rollator.

Maintenance has continued to be negligent and yesterday they decided to try to take care of the mold themselves by opening the drywall and spraying a mixture of bleach and ammonia based mold spray, effectively gassing our apartment with a combination of MORE mold spores that were a result of the drywall being torn out. The externally sourced mold specialist/repair man confirmed that the mold amount was certainly bad enough in quantity and location (in our air ducts, especially with a hole in the vent in that closet circulating the mold through the apartment) to make us all ill regardless of what type of mold it is. The symptoms, however, point towards it being one of the Scary Molds (I'm guessing Stachybotrys or Aspergillus, probably more likely the former based on the symptoms, however I'm not an expert and I don't think the experts even tested the type).

Then on top of that, yesterday when we applied to the new apartment, they said they had to move our application to another unit because someone else applied and units go on a first come first serve basis. The unit we originally applied for had a rent special where first month's rent was free. Now the unit we moved the application to doesn't have that special and so now we are expected to pay $995 more up front than we are expected. With that being said, we went from having enough money for the uhaul, needed furniture and cleaning supplies (as I have severe allergies that I need to have a clean apartment with), and the move in costs, to now we are short $650 for move in costs AND we do not have any funds for cleaning supplies and a uhaul now thanks to this.

Any help is appreciated. Tips are accepted and appreciated as well on top of the agreed costs for the commission, but are very much not an absolute requirement and will not reflect on the quality of work and customer service kindness.

If you've read this far, thank you very much!

[dayseedrawz2]

Okay, yall asked for it, so here's the Showtime fic!

Some aspects are inspired by a different fic by @sm-baby (also just tagging because you said you want more stuff like this, so ur welcome)

I might split this into parts tho but it depends on if I have the energy to finish it all right now or not

Without further ado, here it is:

☆Settings for two☆

It's been about a month since Pomni arrived in the digital circus. And it's safe to say she hasn't been doing any better than she was the first day... The others have sometimes found her staring off into space, scribbles replacing her eyes. But the one thing that made her cope was plotting and searching for an exit. Witch didn't seem likely... until one day she found what she thought might be the answer she was looking for...

It was early in the morning. She was wandering around the circus grounds aimlessly since she couldn't sleep. When she saw what appeared to be another random door. Presumably leading to some wacky room like all the others. But still she decided to take a closer look. Upon walking closer, she was able to read the heading of the sign on the door:

*Settings room*

She thought to herself:

"This must be it! I have been looking in all the wrong places! Surely, this will have some sort of way to exit!"

She went inside and was greeted by a wall of interactive screens

Graphics <

Difficulty

F.P.S.

Max. Players

She thought for a moment... then she thought of the perfect plan!

Graphics

Difficulty

F.P.S.

Max. Players <<

[Select Max. Amount of players]

- 6 +

"Ok, if I'm right, then if I set the amount lower, I should be kicked out!"

[Select Max. Amount of Players]

-1

- 5 +

One click, and that was it. Now all she had to do was wait...

She quietly sneaked out of the room. She had nothing else to do. Well- at least until Caine woke up everyone else for today's adventure. Boy, was she not looking forward to it...

With nothing else on her mind but the chance of leaving, she continued to pace around the circus halls. So much so that she had lost track of time... Pomni had been walking around for who knows how long, when she was caught off guard by a familiar, cheery, obnoxious voice:

"GOOOOOOOOOD MORNING, POMNI!"

"Gah! Caine!?"

Of course, she thought. The best person to be around when she was disoriented...

"THAT'S ME ALRIGHT! Say, what're you doing up so early? The others usually aren't out of their rooms until the lights come on..."

"I- uhhh couldn't sleep. It's been hard to do so since I've been here..."

"Is that so? Why haven't you been able to, my dear?"

It was odd to her that he would even consider asking. She still hardly trusts him. She hesitantly answered:

"Well... I'm not exactly sure if there's one answer to that. This place can be so bright and loud sometimes. It's so- overwhelming on top of the fact that we are all stuck here..."

"I see... Well, enough waiting around for me! I'm going to go wake up the others! I'll meet you at center stage! See ya later, Pomni!"

"I- okay-"

She was still a bit shocked by the encounter they had. Hopefully, she won't have to deal with this place any longer.

Until then, may as well mentally prepare for the next adventure...

Ok, well, I guess this concludes part 1! Stay tuned for the next!

(Gee, this was alot-)

[frostiwars]

Frosti o Frosti, where art thou

long rambling rant/vent and life update under the cut

Why is chapter 16 taking so long?

- I've mentioned it sparsely but a large chunk of this chapter is a very complicated and extended fight scene. Like, complicated enough that I had to draw up a diagram in my sketchbook. That alone wouldn't be an issue, but in January, I got sick, first with a really bad head cold, and then with walking pneumonia. Because of that I didn't get anything done for like two weeks. Still, that wouldn't be bad enough, right? Well, the problem is that I have this ridiculous art schedule. I try to make sure that I post a piece of art on my Instagram every day of the month that's divisible by three. Not only that, if I miss a day, I still have to 'catch up' and post more than once on the next day. So all those delays meant I spent basically all of February trying to catch back up. Which meant basically I spent two months unable to work on writing at all. So the typical one month delay I experience because of being in school is taking place three months in. (It does not help that I'm on my last semester of college. I don't have a very rough schedule but my hours are set up in such a way that I don't often have long chunks of time to work on things. On top of my weekends being almost completely eaten up by work.) I really really really want to release chapter 16, and I feel like (for spoiler reasons) once I finish it, I'll be able to hopefully slam out chapter 17 very quickly. I just hate feeling like I'm letting you guys down. And before you rush in saying that I'm not, you don't need to worry about that. I know I'm being irrational, I just have ridiculous expectations for myself.

2. You said podfic would be up last month, what gives?

- I pretty much always do all my audio recording in my closet. However, because of some very irritating personal circumstances, every single item I own besides large furniture has been stuffed into my closet. There's barely any room and it would be very difficult to do any recording for long periods of time. I did almost all the recording in January. I read every single line of dialogue and the first chunk of narration. And then this got in the way. Once I get my closet back, I'm probably just gonna start over recording because the setup is gonna be incongruent and that's gonna bug me. The problem is I have no fucking clue when I'm gonna get my recording space back. I'm relying entirely on my family to just randomly decide when I can go back to my normal set up and they are taking their sweet fucking time doing all their shit.

If you can't tell, I'm annoyed and I'm tired and I want nothing more than to be able to just do the things I wanna do. I wanna post stuff and share things with you guys and it eats me up that I'm not able to do that. I'm not really trying to apologize for anything, I'm just venting. I'm tired. I miss writing. And a lot of this is my own fault because I don't need to be doing any of this shit. I don't need such a rough personal art schedule. I don't need to worry about being 'late' for fanfic projects. I don't need to justify myself by saying I'm doing both school and work. But I do anyway because I feel completely disappointed in myself if I'm not doing all of these things. I feel obligated.

I really do love making all of these things. I really love you guys too. I hope you enjoy what I make when I'm done. I hope things are as good as they can be for all of us.

This is way more serious than it needs to be, but it's been a while, and I'm tired. I keep saying it. I'm tired. I'm always tired. I can't wait to move out. I need to take more pride in myself for everything I'm doing.

Well, here's another excerpt of the chapter at least. I'm really loving what I've been able to do in this chapter, and I hope it won't take me much longer. I want to eat my own frontal lobe and rib cage.

[benkyoutobentou]

2025 First Quarter Goals End of Month Check In

This is extremely late, so here's the plan for the rest of the "quarter": I won't be doing a mid month wrap up this month, but I will be doing the end of month wrap up early, since I leave for Japan (!!!) on the 26th.

Firstly, I have been reading so much that I honestly just want to take it easy during March and mood read exclusively. I've been trying to get both my English and Japanese tbrs down, so I haven't fully been focusing on Japanese. I also did not finish another novel in February. I started volume 4 of No. 6 by Asano Atsuko with plenty of time left to finish it in February, and then just ended up needing a break from reading. I also have been reading books not on my tbr for book clubs, and recently reread a favorite of mine (ヒラエスは旅路の果て by Kamatani Yuki) for a manga book club, which was actually a great time. It's been a few years since I read it the first time, and it was nice to see just how much my reading has improved since. No bingo on my board yet, but I'm getting close!

As for finishing a TV show, I watched the majority of 京都寺町三条のホームズ in the first half of February, and then I still haven't finished it. I only have one episode left. It sounded right up my alley- I love Kyoto, mysteries, antiques, and Sherlock Holmes, and yet. I just could not get into this show. I'm planning on watching 四畳半神話大系 (English title: The Tatami Galaxy) next, so hopefully I'll enjoy that more. I keep seeing the book at the bookstore and it looks interesting.

I did indeed finish another level in my kanji app, as well as continue going to my Japanese language exchange. Last week, I played a board game in Japanese (Idol Alive) and it was actually really fun! I'm not usually into board games but I'm considering getting myself a copy just in case I ever have friends over and need a little board game. My Chinese study is also just the same as it's been. I've switched up the way I study vocabulary a bit, though, so I'm hoping that I start to see improvements in that regard. Simply put, I've been reviewing the chapter vocabulary each time I pull out my textbook, which I probably should've been doing all along.

With regards to my one non-language learning goal, I crushed my one-object-a-month crochet goal! I finished the baby blanket early in February (only just gave it to the new mother a few days back though), made a valentine's themed bandana for my dog, made a little jellyfish with the extra blanket yarn, and made a little gargoyle. I'm currently working on two projects at once, which I honestly try to avoid, but I don't have the right size safety eyes for my next doll, and I'm making another gargoyle for my friend before I leave for Japan.

For the rest of the month, I really think I just want to chill, especially with my reading. I might end up focusing on reading my manga and just enjoying my reads instead of trying to read as much as possible in multiple languages and burning myself out by the end of the month. My friends. I read 12 books in February. And started 2 others. I think I can tone it down a bit.

[galvanizedfriend]

YOKAN!!!!! I MISS YOU!!!!! CAN I GET ANY OF YOUR FIC UPDATE BEFORE END OF THIS MONTH!!!! I MISS READING KLAROLINE THROUGH YOUR WORDS!!!!!🥹🥹😭😭😭😭

SORRY for the above spam dear 😔 have really bad days for really long time so missing KLAROLINE and Your fics a bit more these days 🥲

I know you are SUPER BUSY so its okay, whenever you find time to write something or anything, even a small one short from you would do wonders to my days🫰😭💕

Lots of love and motivation to you ❤️🫂🥰

Hope you get the required time to write something 😉🫶

(P.S - Sorry this message is not to disturb you, don't take it the wrong way😭😭 THIS is some motivation from your lovely, stupid fan 🤧)

I owe everyone an explanation 😔

I never meant to take so long to update the story, I genuinely thought I could have another chapter finished in less than a month, but I underestimated how much work I'd have around this time and clearly overestimated my ability to juggle everything.

My work is related to the Olympics, so you can imagine how busy a time this has been. The entire year has been pretty insane in preparation, but the last two months or so especially, and it hasn't even started yet.

I have done some writing, but tbh I have been working so much that I don't think anything I wrote is even salvageable. It probably won't survive a thorough editing, so I might have to start over. And I probably have less than 20% of the chapter completed anyway. And that's just The Wolf, the other WIPS haven't even been opened in months.

In times like this I end up having to choose whether to write or sleep or work or go outside for a couple of hours and see the light of day or go to the gym and in this context writing has sadly been the last thing on my priorities list. :( Not because I don't want to write, but because I simply don't have enough hours on my day.

I'm heading out to Paris this weekend and I won't be back until the Olympics are over, so I'm very sorry but it will be a minute before I have any updates :( I wish I had been able to churn out at least half a chapter, but I struggled a lot with inspiration on the little time I had to write. I remember my original plan was to have six chapters out by now lol What was I smoking?

Sp I'm very, very sorry to you and everyone who has been waiting for updates and sending me messages asking about next chapters. 😔 I really tried, guys, but sometimes things do be this way. Hopefully it will be easier after August.

[uroboros-if]

A few things

Hi guys! Just wanted to drop by and say a few things 💕

One, I will no longer be using Wix for Uroboros, and instead will be using WordPress. This change will happen once I finish Chapter 2 to keep myself focused on priorities with the IF.

Two, I've been writing a lot of personal pieces and projects unrelated to Uroboros, but I've written a lot this past month!

A part of me is sad not to be writing on Uroboros, but I've decided to work on my writing discipline to write a couple thousand words everyday instead of worrying about editing. I hope to translate this skill to the development of Uroboros! November will be Uroboros-free for the time being, however.

I've also done this to not lose steam with Uroboros. A certain mental quirk I have is being dictated by my fixations, varying in length and intensity. While I still love Uroboros dearly as one of my first serious projects, I do not want to lose my excitement for it, and that means writing other personal pieces. ❤️

I've learned quite a bit about myself along the way. For some reason, Uroboros is taking extremely slow for me to write relatively; I used to churn out 2k words a day for any other story. Uroboros is a big departure from that, and even writing 300 words takes the soul from my body.

Another struggle I have is getting past the prologue and Chapter 1 in any story I write. With some excellent advice, I've realized it's because I'm hyperfocused on the plot itself. Plot is the building blocks, the foundation, but story is the tale of the characters themselves, and how they carry the readers through the dullest parts of the novel.

I truly needed a breather from stressing out about Uroboros' progress and its finer details. Stepping away from it has given me clarity and perspective, and I have also began to long to return to it. Distance makes the heart grow fonder!

I will most likely be posting the side project I've been working on, under a different name. It's completely and utterly different from Uroboros, and it targets a much different audience, hence why I want to keep my personas separate. I won't say what it is, however!! :)

It'll be a much, much quicker write than Uroboros, but my magnum opus will always be Uroboros, and I will not waste inspiration on anything else if I had it; it's mainly for days I cannot bring myself to be inspired, which are quite many. 🥺

Anyway, that was quite a ramble. I will hopefully see you guys soon!! 🥺💕💕 In commemoration of this mini update, I will break my rule and write a little for Uroboros today. 💕