#hoo boy this has been in progress for a while

[nebulaeyedfish]

The guardian of The Crab Bucket, Pirate Haven of the Jade Chain Reef.

Tags: @swanofstorie @flyingfish1234

[captainlexapro]

hang on. I just need to talk about quinn's autograph for a minute because i have so much appreciation for the effort and intention he puts into it. (also i love linguistics/language/writing and how people sign their name is actually very interesting to me)

Been thinking about this (x) article from 2021 (and also very much demko saying "thoughtful" for his one word to describe huggy at the nhl awards this year. demmer u don't understand the implications of what you just said).

teammates chirping quinn for being a slow at signing because it's not a scribble or an unintelligible flourish...but he straight up doesn't give a fuck what they think because HE wants HIS signature to be easily distinguishable for FANS. like the awareness of how special that stuff can be for people. 💙 antoine agreeing that "you should always be able to tell the name without the number." YES!!! YOU GET IT!! (don't get me wrong, there can be iconic autographs that aren't legible whatsoever but idk. to me it's something about how it's a name and i'd like to be able to read it. it's so personal and a scribble doesn't feel personal).

i wanted to see how his signature has changed/progressed over the years, so i dug around a bit to see where he's landed at this point. let's back up to the beginning!

2018 (screenshot from this vid) -

huggy's first official nhl signature!!

his draft day signature shows he's still fully spelling out his first name. it also looks just very. teenage boy who can't do cursive.

BUT the elements are already there - heavy on the Qu, the Hu, (new nickname Q-hoo? like yoohoo? no? fine.) and the s. starting to stylize the gh.

*side notes: Qu is such a rough first letters pairing rip... it's a distinct shape. printing Q doesn't flow easily into the u while cursive Q is ugly (in my opinion) and idk if a lot of people actually know what a true cursive Q looks like (hint: it looks like a 2). also, "quinn" is hard just because it's SEVEN vertical elements back to back. i honestly think doing it in cursive requires more focus than printing. hughes is fun because it has the high and low elements right next to each other, which he emphasizes.*

2019 (nhl debut) -

oh boy. sill very choppy. still have those main elements of emphasis happening.

i feel like he probably hadn't started worrying about his signature yet (this was his first game, to be fair).

not a lot of connectivity (especially in Hughes)

the n has hints of what it will become later, though, which is cool to see!

2021 (from article)-

only writing Quinn now (only one dot for an i). maybe to speed it up, maybe just bc that's the nickname he goes by, maybe both.

seeing the connecting line/stroke between the g and h more prominently

s is looking more stylized as well

i think he's picking up the pen a fair amount still (maybe up to 8 or 9 strokes in this one?). so yeah, i'm sure it took a while compared to others...

2022 (from this silly vid)-

this is kind of not a 'true' signature to me bc 1) given the nature of the video i kind of doubt he would have put 100% effort into it (complete lack of stylized s) and 2) you can tell the surface/pen combo isn't great - see the jaggedness on the gh?

this is the most ~scribbly~ version i saw. like i said, idk if i really count this one but i don't want to dig around forever to find a confirmed 2022 signature

regardless, he seems to have sped it up and is better at the cursiveness aspect. Most of it is connected - i'd guess 5 total strokes for that version.

2023 (from wallpapers on the canucks' insta)-

definitely more committed to a "look"

Qu is kind of aggressive lol and the gh stroke isn't super smooth either. HOWEVER it is 100% a stylistic element he focuses on. also it's fast to connect them, so it probably feels pretty natural. just needed more practice on keeping that stroke aligned.

officially no dotting of the i anymore - just swooping up high (again, probably helps with speed)

we have the fully stylized s! i'm actually very fond of that part because lots of people will let the last letters fall to the wayside and basically just draw a line. he's kinda doing that a smidge with the n. but there's intention on the s and it looks very nice!

2023/2024 (from canucks' wallpapers & inhousemade insta)-

here we have our latest iteration

I reallyyy like the finishing on the n - it matches well with how he does the s, which is so pretty. such a fun letter to write lol

i think the gh line has been fully mastered at this point. and it's a good way to keep his signature legible but still give it a unique flair. not everyone's signature/name has that type of line so ppl can pick his name out rather easy i would guess.

i think huggy's probably settled on autograph style/look at this point. but i will still keep an eye out to see if he decides to try a new element!

thanks for reading and hopefully you found this mildly interesting ☺️

[genericpuff]

Can you give us your thoughts on Big Ethel Energy? I haven’t seen anything glaringly wrong with it tbh, but I might not be educated on the topics the comic brings up.

TBF I haven't read it as extensively as LO (though that's a loaded comparison because I definitely put WAY more into analyzing LO than most webtoons LMAO) but my biggest issue with BEE is just like... the main cast (primarily made up of women) are so manipulative and toxic all the time. A lot of the comic's narrative feels very preachy while not actually practicing that empathy, very similarly to LO in which characters will just yeet out Therapy Speak or whatever have you and then use it to justify their shitty actions, rather than actually learn from them/correct them/etc.

One big example I can think of that alerted me to its issues (as many others) was the scene where Betty tears into her boss (Seth):

And he totally has a point, he acknowledges that he made a misstep but I don't think the irony of her calling him a "judgmental jerk" has been lost here because she's literally basing her judgments of him off instant reactions (and hoo boy, do a lot of the characters in this comic do that, but we'll get into that shortly).

But then there's complete tonal whiplash where they go upstairs to the roof where he reveals that he's changed his decision about working with Veronica (thus correcting the misstep that Betty was calling him out on) and Betty is just SO overjoyed by this that she-

Like, this is her boss, for starters, who she's kissing (without his consent or even any signalling that he wanted to kiss her in that moment) literally MOMENTS after she called him a "judgmental jerk". And then when he rejects her because there would be a power imbalance in their relationship that he's not comfortable with (which is a VERY reasonable boundary to set), she just ?? Goes right back to being mad at him and the story paints it as if he's at fault ??

Like they actually had the opportunity to showcase a story in which a power imbalance in the workplace ISN'T romanticized (like it is in so many webtoons like LO and Let's Play) and instead it made the boss out to be the bad guy for rejecting the advances of a female lead. And so many of the female characters in the story are like this, it's like they're trying so hard to be "strong independent women" but then they just come across as manipulative and mean all the time. Like sorry, but you can't just use "progressive language" like "mansplaining" to make your characters seem smart, Betty is being a huge asshole here over something SHE caused. It's very "woman good, man bad" with no nuance or consideration for the actions of either party.

And of course, they follow it up with Betty actually realizing she wasn't in the right, only for Veronica to come in and be like "nah you're allowed to hate who you hate" even though that kind of advice totally isn't constructive here when Seth was being completely reasonable. So Betty is literally just flip-flopping between actually caring about Seth and his boundaries to hating on him for having them at all.

Like, this is so miserable to read. Don't get me wrong, Veronica is traditionally a very "fuck you, I do what I want" character, but it just feels so gross when we know what Betty did was wrong and Betty ought to know this as well because she's usually the more reasonable foil to Veronica. It's not like it's empowering either of them the same way it would if they were fighting over Archie (as they traditionally do in Archie comics) and then mutually decided he wasn't worth destroying their friendship over, this is Betty's boss who she kept changing her opinion about based on whether or not he sided with her. It's flimsy. And they never really address Betty's behavior here going forward or use this as an opportunity for growth (at least from what I read following this, mind you I haven't kept up on the comic in a while).

To talk about the main character, Ethel, there's actually another weird scene that comes after the Betty/Veronica exchange, this is after she's started seeing Moose (though they don't have an official relationship yet) and is going over to his house for the first time.

Like, these two aren't even officially dating yet and she's already nitpicking things about him and taking his choices personally. It feels very unnecessary and vapid - and if you're someone who's read Archie comics before, it feels very out of character for someone like Ethel, who's traditionally a very sweet (albeit hopeless romantic) girl, here she just feels mean all the time.

And the comic as a whole just has a lot of these passive aggressive scenes. The internal monologuing of Ethel is insufferable because it's often just her constantly judging people or jumping to extreme conclusions. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for characters who aren't morally good, but I don't want to read a story that lives in the head of an asshole LOL

All that said, I haven't kept up on anything from BEE in a while, from what I've scrolled through of newer episodes at a glance it seems to have dialed back on some of that passive aggressiveness, but I'm gonna have to do a re-read of it at some point with the newer episodes included to form a stronger opinion. So take what I say here with grains of salt.

I just don't think it's necessarily a good example of a "strong romance series". Everything feels so petty all of the time and when it does try to act informed or mature, it's completely undercut by characters who can't practice what they preach. A lot of comics on the platform tend to stress "women supporting women" but then really it turns into "women hating men" and it's just like...?? Is that really the point of the message we're trying to get across here?

Add in the extremely stiff dialogue and text dumping and cheap art, and this just doesn't feel like something that would be made for a series like Archie of all things. The Archie franchise has really been suffering from lame melodrama and unlikeable characters as of late, I know there's only so much one can do to re-adapt a series that was from the 1940's, but it feels like it's often misinterpreting the point of the more modernized messages they're trying to preach rather than giving us an actual story with characters who learn and develop along the way. It comes across more as the Archie franchise looking for shortcuts to connect with "today's audience" by using cheap buzzwords rather than put any actual effort into the writing.

IDK, it's just a very mediocre comic with very mediocre attempts at seeming "progressive" and it feels so disingenuous. The characters never feel like they have any real integrity or development, especially with how some of them flip-flop on a dime based on whatever the creators want the audience to feel.

It's just a big ball of 'meh'.

[chiprewington]

i'd love to hear some of your chip headcanons :3

HOO BOY UHH

Random Miscellaneous Chip Revvington Headcanons below! A fair warning that they start simple but I kind of... started to go off the rails a little bit. These also aren't everything, this would be so much longer if I had to list every single detail about him and I don't wanna do that LMAO

He didn't have a childhood. Rather, he was a suit that was built straight into adulthood, and after some prep was sent off into college. I like to think his first words were "What the frack".

His idea of "casual-wear" involves a lot of leather, tees, and/or tank-tops. Jackets with a ridiculous amount of zippers and most often in black, grey, or denim. The fact he barely has any time for himself however means he's not exactly gonna be wearing that kind of stuff anytime soon.

He's absolutely a metalhead. Probably has a decked out battle vest somewhere still in storage. He's a fan of progressive rock (and a variety of rock music in general) as well, but heavy metal is his primary go-to.

Hates being touched unprompted. Hates hates hates it. You will get a flinch out of him before he shoots you a glare and shoves you away. Do not touch him. Especially do not touch his saw.

I know I touched on this previously, but he used to emote using his saw. Plenty of revs to signify sighs, laughter, growling, etc. These days, he physically restrains himself. Revving instills a distinct feeling of dread inside him, even if it used to bring him comfort.

He doesn't own his own house, being in the middle of a war and all. Rather, there's a spare room at Cut to the Chase! that's sort of been remodeled into kind of a very compact... room. He's got a bed fit for a single tier 8 cog (though, he's a bit bigger than a normal tier 8) and plenty of drawers and shelves. Not really much room for anything else. It's enough to move around in.

Even then, he doesn't usually use that room. Usually he just turns on sleep mode while sat in his office chair. ...On that subject, he's shut off his dream capabilities. These days he gets nothing but nightmares, so there's no point.

He doesn't usually go in for maintenance hour, as it's the only consistent time he's able to have time for himself. It's okay though, he knows how to do some minor repairs on himself anyways. ...Most of the time it eventually ends with him turning on the aforementioned sleep mode before he starts dwelling too much on his thoughts, however. ...Oh, and he tends to get an earful once he's forced to go in.

[cobaltswriting]

Character Essay: Snape

So, there are some characters that I have feelings about. Like, that I can see what the author was trying to do with them, but I also just... think they failed.

Unsurprisingly, two of these characters have to do with Harry Potter. Severus Snape, and Albus Dumbledore.

Yes, I know, J.K. Rowling is a terrible person and a TERF. But this is still something I wanna write about. And this is my blog. So... yeah. The Albus Dumbledore post might come later.

So, Severus Snape.

I’m gonna break this down into 3 big issues I have with the character. Which does definitely call into question the way Snape was written. And I'll even put it under a read more so any people who are pro-Snape for whatever reason don't have to read any further.

And yeah, this isn't going to be nice to Snape. Like, I've said it before, and I'll say it again, Albus Severus Potter should have been named Rubeus Remus. It is actually kind of a crime that he never named a child for Hagrid, considering Hagrid was literally the first person who was nice to him and introduced him to the Wizarding World. But I digress, let's get to the main subject of this essay.

1. Treatment of Students

We know why Snape treats Harry like shit. It doesn't make it ok, but I wanna talk about other students. Disregarding the favouritism towards his own house, we already come across a huge problem, that is also a problem with Dumbledore as well...

Snape's an abusive teacher.

Even if we disregard Snape's treatment of Harry, we have how he treats students like Neville, and insults leveled at students not within his house. Even the best Hermione, who is basically as close to a perfect student as we get, is simply ignored and passed over without a comment, and Neville... Hoo boy.

Like, I don't know the specific guidelines teachers are given that they're not allowed to cross, but Snape breaks almost all of them. Insults and abuse are hurled towards Neville constantly, even when he's in other classes, like him insulting Neville right in front of Lupin. And while I do like Lupin... Lupin just smiles at it. Nothing ever happens. Snape apparently never even gets told off about abusing his students. Hell, he yells at Hermione and Harry in front of the Minister for Magic in the 3rd book, and Fudge, while surprised, does nothing about it other than trying to calm Snape down.

Like, is abuse just... not a thing in the Wizarding World? This comes up in my thoughts about Dumbledore as well, beyond this, but...

If Snape was a teacher anywhere else, he would have been fired. Like, immediately. But he's just allowed to do so. Like, the closest thing to punishment he gets is that he's not allowed to teach Defence of the Dark arts until Harry's 6th year.

And just so we know this isn't the norm, let's look at another teacher... Minerva McGonagall.

She is the head of Gryffindor House (although I still think she should be a Ravenclaw. As should Hermione. BUT ANYWAY) but she does not favour her house. Excluding Quidditch, in which she supports her House's team, but that's a different thing, that's fine. Whereas Snape has probably never taken so much as a single point from Slytherin, she was responsible for the largest amount of points taken from Harry at one time, if I'm right. If not the largest amount, certainly the largest amount of points taken in the first book. She is also strict, but is also shown to be fair, and will compliment a student and praise them if they do well. She praises Hermione in their first class, because while Hermione did not entirely succeed, she did show godd progress for her first try. And while we do not see her compliment a student from another House, it can be assumed that it does happen.

This is how a teacher SHOULD be. They are there to nurture students, teach them, not abuse them and play favourites.

There are other teachers in Hogwarts, but Snape is the main one who abuses them. A case could be made for Barty Crouch (disguised as Mad-Eye Moody) abusing them, by putting them under the Imperius Curse) but considering he was a Death Eater, and was apparently doing it because Dumbledore wanted him to, we'll just... ignore him. I don't think it's too far from what Moody would actually do, although I don't like to think of Moody as abusive.

But yeah, Snape is very abusive of his students, to the point that the most positive thing he can really do towards a student that isn't from Slytherin is ignore them or say nothing. And abuse is a really fucking bad thing, in case you didn't know.

Let's move onto the next topic...

2. His 'love' of Lily Evans

Yeah, I put the love in quotation marks. Mainly because it... doesn't really read that much like love to me. I am aromantic, so that might have SOMETHING to do with it, but...

It just comes off more as a creepy sort of obsession than anything else. An obsession deep enough for him to have a doe as a patronus.

Like... let's start from the beginning. The first time we see Snape and Lily, Snape is spying on her and it's implied that he's been doing so for a little bit. Even though they're just kids, I'm pretty sure that counts as stalking. And then he makes a branch fall on Petunia when she insults them, which could have seriously injured her, depending on the size of the branch and where it hit her. It was enough to make Petunia cry at the least when it hit her shoulder.

Snape also encouraged Lily to steal letters from her sister and read them, when they found out that Petunia had written to Hogwarts. Although I guess that doesn't really come into the subject of his 'love' for Lily.

We also see that Snape is very... racist, I guess? Does the whole blood thing count as racist? Calling Lily a Mudblood, and then when he tries to apologise he can't even deny that if it was anyone but her, he would not apologise for it. So basically having different rules for her, which I guess could come into a love thing but the fact that he calls muggleborns Mudblood and yet 'loves' one comes out as... kinda fetishistic to me, I'm not gonna lie.

In the books we also have him desperate to protect her from Voldemort, crying when she's dead... And yet despite that, he is horribly abusive to her son, just because he looks like his father. And yet he does say that he wants to keep him safe, angry at Dumbledore when he finds out they've basically been raising him like a lamb to the slaughter. So apparently he's fine with possibly mentally scarring Harry, but killing him? Oh, that's just totally unforgivable!

You can point out various things across the books that Snape has done for Harry, but that doesn't change the fact that Snape is INCREDIBLY abusive to Harry, even moreso than he is to other students.

And then we have him taking part of Lily's letter, just because it had her signiture, and part of the photo that showed her in it, which just... always struck me as creepy. Stalker-ish. I dunno how to explain it any better than that.

And then, we have absolutely the creepiest part... him wanting Harry to look at him as he dies. Just so he can pretend that he's looking into Lily's eyes, probably. Which... yeah, that's just super creepy.

Like, I honestly cannot see it as romance at all. It just comes off as Snape having an obsession. It's even worse in the movies where he is shown cradling Lily's dead body against him and crying. Which normally wouldn't be that bad but with everything else on top of that... yeah.

This does bring us onto the last subject...

3. Snape's 'Redemption'

Snape's redemption is supposed to happen after his death. Here's the problem... he's one of the main examples about why J.K. is very poor when it comes to redeeming characters. Like, Draco could have been set up for a redemption, but he wasn't, as were his parents. Snape was set up for a redemption... and J.K. seems to think it was enough?

So, the main thing that is supposed to redeem Snape, that is meant to make us think he's ok... is showing us his past with Lily, and various discussions with Dumbledore. The whole sequence is for exposition and to try and make us think Snape is a good guy because he 'loved' Lily, and that was his motivation for everything good he did. Which, again, comes off as pretty obsessive.

Here's the thing though...

Snape abused Harry for 6 years of his life. He made Draco set a snake on him in his second year. He repeatedly broke into Harry's mind which seemed to end up having the opposite effect that Dumbledore wanted. Dumbledore even basically admits as much, saying that Snape was a poor choice for it, that he had hoped Snape would be able to see past his hatred of Harry's father. He refused to listen to anyone when it came to Sirius, refusing the possibility that Sirius might be innocent (until Dumbledore talked to him about it, probably), outed a colleague as a werewolf, which, considering the allergory J.K. was aiming for, was like outing a gay man, and made him resign from his job because he knew student's parents would be writing in to complain about it, so it essentially cost Lupin a job, which as we know, is already something that werewolves had problems with.

I do have issues with J.K.'s allergory of werewolves as homosexuals... but let's just say that one of the most notable werewolves, after Remus, was known for attacking and 'turning' children and leave it at that. It's not relevant to the topic at hand anyway.

Showing us that Snape did some things right, and that he 'loved' Lily... like, let's pretend that he did love Lily for a moment, and that it wasn't a creepy obsession.

... That still doesn't excuse the shit he did. It doesn't excuse the abuse at all. It doesn't redeem him from being a Death Eater. His only reason for wanting to save the Potter family was Lily.

Saving Harry's life in the first year by countering Quirrell's curse, and then acting as referee in the next match to protect Harry? That doesn't redeem the abuse that he inflicted upon Harry in the first year, let alone the rest of it.

Let's assume he had the best intentions in Prisoner of Azkaban, and he was interested in rescuing Harry, Ron and Hermione from Sirius. Although that is a HUGE assumption, all things considered... still doesn't redeem him.

Checking that Sirius was indeed at headquarters and then alerting them that Harry had gone to the Department of Mysteries to try and save Sirius when Sirius wasn't even there? Still doesn't redeem him.

None of the good things Snape does redeems him for the abuse he inflicted upon his students and especially Harry and Neville, and his love for Lily reads more like a creepy obsession.

J.K. tried to redeem Snape... and absolutely failed. Sometimes when you write a character, you need more than a single chapter to redeem them.

I'm not even sure if Snape was redeemable at all. Abusing children is a pretty fucking terrible thing. And I don't think it's even me being biased for being abused by a teacher, it's just unacceptable.

[pluckyredhead]

Shipping ask: Tim/Bernard?

Hoo boy. Don't ship it, alas.

Why don't you ship it?

Listen. I WOULD LOVE TO. I am thrilled that Tim has finally been allowed to come out after being really really queer for...oh, 33 years? But DC has just completely dropped the ball. @irolltwenties said a lot of what I'm feeling here, but I'm opinionated so I'm gonna say it myself, too.

The short version: DC refuses to let Bernard have a personality or let Tim have any relationship with him beyond the most superficial, empty window dressing possible.

The long version: I remember Bernard, y'all. I'm an old lady who was actually reading his original appearances when they came out! He was a weird, annoying kid who thought that being aggressively "quirky" made him cool when it actually just made him obnoxious...which allowed him to circle back around to being endearing. He liked to hear himself talk. He enjoyed being a tour guide, gossiping, and conspiracy theories - he's the guy who likes to know things, or at least seem like he does. Whether you liked him or not (I liked him), he was specific.

Now? The only thing recent comics will tell you about Bernard is that he's blond. Tim might as well be dating a cardboard cutout, or a post-it that says "Boyfriend" on it. Is he gay or bi, or does he prefer a different label, or none at all? Did he always have a crush on Tim, or is this new? Was his vocal interest in Darla and Tim's stepmother Dana just performative, or was he actually into them? What does he do when he's not smiling blandly under a narration box full of exposition? Does he have hobbies? Does he have a personality?

I do have to disagree with my beloved @irolltwenties on one thing: I don't think Tim is getting all the development in this relationship. I don't think Tim's gotten any, either. He told Bernard that he wanted to date him in August of 2021, but have we progressed in any significant way with his character since then? He spent three issues of Urban Legends agonizing over his sexuality in a way that was so repressed he wouldn't even admit that was what he was doing, but how does he feel about it now? He hasn't said in a comic whether he's gay or bi or pan or even queer - and look, I'm not saying he needs to know what label he prefers, or whether he needs to use one at all. But that should be a character choice too! We don't know if he has an identity he's comfortable with, or isn't sure yet, or is rejecting all of them, or is refusing to think about it. We literally don't know anything about Tim's sexuality except that it includes Bernard, including how Tim feels about it.

We also haven't gotten to see him come out to a single person. Again, I don't want to reduce queer narratives to cliches, but like...it's very weird that it's happened off-panel repeatedly? With Bruce, with Steph, with Young Justice. I'm assuming the rest of his family knows, based on...exposition about Damian that doesn't even make sense. We don't get to see this fucking conversation with Dick? Are you KIDDING me? Some of us have been waiting literal decades for Tim to come out and we get absolutely zero of the emotional catharsis of that? It feels like we're being cheated, honestly it does.

And speaking of being cheated...we never did get to see that Tim and Bernard date. Or a conversation about their history, or liking boys, or literally anything ever. When was their first kiss? I WOULD HAVE LIKED TO SEE THE FIRST TIME TIM KISSED A BOY. I THINK A LOT OF PEOPLE WOULD HAVE LIKED THAT. We don't even know how long they've been dating - Tim's current mini said it's been "months" and "a month" in the same issue. Go, DC, give us nothing!

I don't know why Tim's sexuality and his relationship with Bernard are being handled like this. Is it because they're afraid that if they allow it to be three dimensional it won't be sealed in its "unproblematic queer rep" mylar bag and board anymore? Is it because they're trying to get credit for Bi Tim while leaving it as vague as possible to not offend homophobes? Is it because they're just doing a crappy job? It's so strange to me because that first Urban Legends story was so good, and I really was rooting for Meghan Fitzmartin because it is so, so hard to be a woman in comics. But so far, it's just been a disappointment.

2. What would have made you like it?

If we had actually gotten weird, annoying OG Bernard, I feel like that would have been very entertaining - Tim is such a reserved character that I always enjoy seeing him play off against someone chaotic (Steph, Kon and Bart, even Jason to an extent). Also just like...seeing the actual relationship on the page??? I'm begging here, DC.

3. Despite not shipping it, do you have anything positive to say about it?

I am strongly in favor of the concept! Tim dating a boy is long overdue. I just need DC to give me specific characters in a specific relationship, ON THE PAGE.

[hoarding-stories]

Favorite Midst character?

Hoo boy, that's a tough one! In fact, I'm going to cheat and give my favorite out of the 3 main characters and my favorite secondary character as well.

The main three are very, very closely ranked, but I'd have to say Moc Weepe is my favorite. I love me a good bastard man, and everything he's done and been through so far is fascinating. Thanks to the narrative distance he got in the 2nd season, I genuinely have no idea what the hell he's going to do now and/or what part he's going to play into whatever unfolds and I cannot wait to see it. His is for sure the arc that I think will be the most interesting to examine after everything is said and done. (Also in the poll I took on possible MC deaths, most thought he was going to be the one to die, if any, which is really fun. He really is giving doomed vibes)

As for secondary characters, it's again a close race, but I'd say Saskia is my favorite. Like while Spahr is fun to chew on as far as character progression, and Imelda is a wonderful villain to watch, Saskia is appealing not only because she has so much we don't know about her and how she got to where she is but also because she's a decent person. I'll be interested to see where this season takes her and her impact on things

Thank you for the ask!

[ghostlycorvid]

2023 Introspective

This year started with cutting off a toxic person who had already shut me out of mutual friend spaces but kept stringing me along with "maybe in a few more months I'll let you back in". 2022 was rough on its own, especially pre-antidepressants, but a huge part of it was stuff involving this person. Blocking them and finally accepting that it was not worth trying to repair what little relationship was left was the most freeing thing I've ever done and helped me to continue that with any other rude unpleasant individual I've had to share spaces with. It's been genuinely wonderful to realize I don't have to sit there and listen to bad takes or people who are needlessly mean, so I'm glad something came out of that friendship nightmare scenario.

It still took a lot of time to not sit there in anger and frustration spirals over the way things ended up, but in February I got permission from my bosses to bring my dog Chili to work with me due to needing to keep him and our other dog from playing while she was recovering from her spay. I ended up realizing that even though Chili is a huge anxiety baby, having him with me legitimately was helping distract me from negative thoughts spirals and gave me something positive to focus on when I was getting frustrated by work-related stuff in the moment. He ended up helping a couple coworkers come down from panic attacks later in the year too. My boss likes how "calm" he is enough that he gave me permission to bring Chili to work all the time (within reason), so he's come with me on most non-event days. His progress has been slow, but he's also been improving from the regular socialization!

I finally started to really focus on my own art and developing my own products and designs, both for my personal shop and for the shop at work. I've come out the other side of this year with 9 new enamel pin designs between the two! (A couple I haven't shared yet! ;D)

I was finally given an Adderall prescription which magically solved my problem where I couldn't stay awake during the day no matter how much sleep I'd gotten! And also it started helping me focus a little better too, but genuinely the non-sleepy thing was the most lifechanging part of the medication for me. The pit in my stomach when I was told that person felt like I was stalking and surveilling them if I was quiet in a call or stream despite years of me communicating that I was constantly struggling to even stay conscious was... HOO BOY. After years of fighting for my life to stay awake in college and sometimes even while DRIVING TO AND FROM WORK,,,,,,,, I really thought something was seriously wrong with me (besides the ADHD since I didn't realize it was a symptom of that)

With toxic people removed from my social spaces and general perception, I've finally started to join group calls with my friends again without anxiety or fear of not being welcome. It's helped me start to get back into playing games again, and I've been able to get into a few that either have built in accessibility features to avoid hand strain, or I've been able to modify my hardware setup to help with issues I was running into before. I've finally managed to pick up Warframe again, and I'm bouncing between that and Path of Titans without being hopelessly deep in a hyperfocus.

I officially got promoted at my job to Retail & Visitor Services manager (and got a $3 raise in Nov!!). While I'm struggling with finding help to ease my increased workload, I'm definitely way better off than before we hired on extra staff. It's given me a lot of networking opportunities (and excuses to go on field trips on the clock for ~*networking*~) and I've been juuuust starting to poke my head into local groups. One is a monthly artists crafting meetup right by work that starts right when I clock out! :D

I had the energy and free time to start branching out and trying other arts and crafts hobbies that had been interesting me! Ended up getting a serger machine to help really tidy up clothes that I make! I got into linocut & block printing, and have been having a lot of fun working on designs for that kind of printing. I even made a few printed shirts! And of course there was Andromeda, the first puppet I've ever made, and pretty much my proudest achievement in all my years of art so far.

I've honestly been spending less time on social media proper, usually forgetting to check tumblr for days or weeks at a time. Which has been good and bad, but overall better for me to stop feeling like I HAVE to fully backlog everything ever.

I got my first tattoo this year after wanting one for years and years! And that opened up a whole new can of worms and now I'm ending the year with 5 tattoos and 2 more scheduled in the next couple months oops! My first tattoo was Joltik, with my first ever pet spide!

I started keeping spiders this year after years of being too concerned about keeping pets that required live feeding! That also was a slippery slope. I picked up Indrid my red-backed jumper and Autumn my pumpkin patch t at the end of January, and now I have them, a regal jumper, a red-knee t, and a togo starburst t. You'd never guess that less than a decade ago I was scared shitless of all spiders. :> Especially now that I will occasionally free-handle wild spiders that need relocation to someplace safer. (Mostly still just jumpers tho)

Things aren't perfect by any means and I still have a lot of areas I want to personally improve myself in, but I feel like overall this has been a really really good year for me and I want to keep that momentum going into 2024! More art! More projects just for me! More time with friends! More enjoying games! More tidying my space literally and metaphorically!

[kelpan]

So…. did I vastly underestimate how hard the holiday season as a whole would weigh on my mental health? Hoo boy yes I did. Did I also bite off more than I could chew in a single chapter, and end up splitting it into two so I didn't go mad? Also yes. Did I take into consideration any of my personal health issues throughout all this, and prioritize them amidst an uptick of work in order to avoid crashing and burning? No, no I did not.

Needless to say, sorry for the bit of a delay in an update, but please enjoy what I have so far for you all! Hopefully I'll be able to get the next one edited and posted soon.

And as a personal note, please don't be like me. The holidays can be unduly hard sometimes. Please don't forget to eat, drink water, and get some rest. There is no shame in taking care of yourself. I hope for anyone else struggling right now, you find some tiny moments of joy to help carry you through <3

Credit for the OC Chrysanthemum headshot goes to wwispie on Etsy/Instagram!

Ao3: Petals on a Stream of Stars

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Act 1, Chapter 10: Storytime

Wednesday

4:30 pm

Chrysanthemum

It was almost too easy to stay on the sidelines while Sun and the kids ran about, weaving in and around as they screamed their little heads off. As caretakers, they’d naturally fallen into a good working dynamic together, their individual care styles complimenting the other; Sun, with his never-ending energy, kept everyone up and playing, a veritable fountain of excitement. Whereas Chrys, when the inevitable would occur and a lone child would tap out, out of breath, she would step in, meeting each one with grace and keep them occupied until their little batteries recharged enough that they felt ready and able to rejoin the group. 

The party progressed well, managing to make it to a third round of “Princess and Gremlins”, a tie-breaker to determine the fate of the kingdom. In an unforeseen twist, the kids decided to forge an alliance in order to defeat their true obstacle, the mighty dragon, who ensured not a soul could reach the princess. Gremlins and Knights alike swarmed Sun’s feet, their war cry valiant and determined. 

“Ack, what is this??? Betrayal! Betrayal most foul! Run my princess, run while you still can!”

Using his superior reach to his advantage, Sun took Marigold off his shoulders and placed her outside the swarm of kids, before collapsing to the ground, surrendering to their tickle attack.

“No! You are too much for me! I… I have been… defeated…”

With over-dramatized flair, Sun breathed his last, and the kids cheered, standing triumphant over their slain foe. 

“Ha, alright you little monsters, you’ve won, you’ve won. Let him get up.”

There was little resistance as they followed Chrys’s instructions, the whole group a mess of sweat and smiles. He’d succeeded in tuckering them right out. 

“It seems to me like everyone could use a break,” Sun asked, head raised. “Would anyone like to sit and listen to a story?” 

Shouts of “Yes!” and “Yeah, yeah!” followed. 

“Wonderful! Head on over to the reading corner then, Sunbites, while Miss Chrys gets you all a little something to drink.”

The children needed no more encouragement, and finding their second wind, pushed their little legs as fast as they could go to claim the best spots on the rug first. Chrys sauntered over, stopping at Sun’s head, arms crossed as she loomed over him for once. 

“You doing alright down there?”

His smile faltered, and for a moment she worried something actually was wrong. His face held a seriousness she wasn’t used to, at least not from him. She tucked a strand of hair that fell out of place behind her ear in an effort to mask her growing concern.

“Uh, hello? Earth to Sunny? Those kids didn’t knock your motherboard out of place, did they?”

Still, he didn’t answer her, but sat up on his elbows, rotating his head on its axis so he still faced her head on, despite his torso remaining angled in the opposite direction. There was a look to his eyes she couldn’t place, something intense yet… sincere. The lack of levity she normally saw there sent a rush of goosebumps across her skin. She could do nothing to break the tension while he continued to stare, grateful then once he finally spoke. 

“The lights make your hair look like you have a halo around you. It’s… stunning.”

His tone held nothing but awe, a dissonant thought for her to comprehend directed at herself. Heat snuck into her cheeks against her will, and she turned away, unable to stand to meet his gaze any longer. If such a comment would have come from anyone else, she’d have denied it without a second thought. But from Sunny… her instincts misfired. She cleared her throat to break the silence.

“Oh, s-stop kidding around, ya goofball, the kids are waiting.”

She booped his nose, the easiest way she could think of to get them back to the casual ease she was used to with him, and give her a chance to hide her cheeks. Thankfully, he took the hint. 

“Right you are, sunshine! You mind grabbing the juices?”

“Not at all. You get going.”

True to form, he flipped his head around and curled himself into a rolling tumble, popping himself upright to dismount before jogging over to the group of waiting kids, bells jingling mirthfully. Chrys watched him leave, a smile worming its way onto her face even as she shook her head. 

Don’t read into it too much Chrys, he probably doesn’t realize how things like that can be misconstrued. Get your head on straight…

She’d learned the day before that a small fridge sat just behind the security desk, which housed all their cold refreshments. While meals weren’t usually their responsibility, it was good to have some water and juices on hand for certain situations. Using the loose fabric of her shirt to make a pouch with, she filled up on little juice pouches and tiny bottles of water and made her way towards the back half of the room where everyone else waited. 

Sun’s voice cut through the cacophony of childish voices, heard all the way from where she was. It sounded as if someone was having an argument over their spot selection. She wasn’t surprised, not with how easily amped these kids were. Sun was a saint to have handled this many kids on his own before. 

She hurried back, managing to reach the group just as everyone seemed to settle down. While she handed out the drinks, Sun called out to Marigold, asking her to come up front. 

“As our birthday girl and honorary princess for the day, why don’t you pick out the story? Go ahead and choose whatever you want from the bookshelf.”

She smiled wide, and ran to search the collection. It took her hardly a minute to find the one she wanted, and soon came bounding back, book in tow. 

“Why thank you!” Sun took her selection from her. “Let’s see… Oh. “The Gardener’s Daughter”. I don’t recognize this one. Well, we can just discover it all together then!”

 Trailing a finger down the edge lengthwise, he flipped the book open, and pulled out a small microchip embedded in its blank pages. He then inserted the chip into a hidden port at the back of his head, eyes glowing entirely white while the information transferred. The kids waited with bated breath, their anticipation mounting once his pupils returned to their normal sky-blue color. Chrys found the perfect place to sit, where she could still keep an eye on everyone, and made herself comfortable, sitting crisscross on the floor. With a squeal of glee, Marigold hurried to rejoin the group, but chose instead to plop herself down on Chrys’s lap rather than return to her original spot. Chrys gave a small “oof” as her body adjusted to the child’s additional weight, and the girl relaxed against her.

“Alright, is everybody ready?” Sun asked.

“Yes!” Shouted the crowd in unison.

“Fantastic!” Soft, subtle woodwind music began to play through the loudspeakers at his command, adding a touch of magic to the atmosphere. Chrys made one last quick visual sweep over the group, just to make sure all was well, before letting her attention fall completely under the spell of Sun’s dynamic storytelling. 

“Once upon a time, there lived a young prince in a magnificent castle. His life was a blessed one, full of all the luxuries one could imagine. But for all his riches, there was one thing he lacked, something he desperately longed for. Companionship. His father was a stern, serious ruler, his smiles saved only for court. His mother, lost to childbirth. The boy was alone, with not even the servants willing to care for him more than their duties demanded.  

For weeks upon weeks, months upon months, the boy pleaded for a friend to any who would listen. He’d willingly go to every magic lesson with the cranky old wizard, would never refuse to eat another vegetable again, whatever it took. For just as long a time, his wishes fell on deaf ears. Until one day, the fates decided to grant his request.

The boy awoke to find that they had lost their best gardener in an unfortunate accident, killed while protecting his father. As a means to reward the man for his valiant service after death, the king appointed the man’s widow as the new royal nanny, providing both security and sustenance for his family, including that of his only child. A girl, of about the same age as the young prince. 

He had his playmate at last. 

From then on, the two spent every spare second of the day together. Playing. Exploring. Growing. Learning. The years passed quickly for the pair, though their time together dwindled as they grew older, pulled apart by their individual studies. Though the responsibilities of life kept them apart, the prince thought of her often, his heart always yearning to be by her side. 

With the dawn of the prince’s 20th year, the time finally came where he’d mastered his studies, earning him the right to be considered of age, and the entire kingdom ran atwitter with excitement. The king sent invitations far and wide for all to come and celebrate the prince with a glorious ball. The servants decorated, the chefs cooked, and after months of preparation, the night of the ball arrived. 

Family and honored guests of all kinds arrived in droves, all dressed in their finest in the hopes of attracting the eye of the newly eligible young royal, though none would be able to. The prince had his sights set on one person, and one person only. He searched the ballroom high and low for her, failing to find even a glimpse. That is, until the band started to play a new song, capturing the attention of all. 

There she stood, the Gardener’s Daughter, singing alongside the band with a voice that stilled the entire ballroom, no longer a child but that of a beautiful young woman, as bright and inviting as any flower bloom. The prince, mesmerized, knew then and there who his future queen would be.   

But as quickly as the fates could give, the fates could also take away. 

Black smoke filled the room, pouring in from every window and doorway. All the guests choked, and the prince faltered, unable to see his beloved in the onyx haze. An evil chuckle resounded, and like the wind, the smoke disappeared, revealing to all that though everything appeared the same, something was very, very wrong.

The Gardener’s daughter had disappeared. 

In a fit of rage, the prince—”

The sharp creak of the entrance gates cracking open disrupted the illusion, shattering the story. All eyes drawn to the front, two human staff-members entered the daycare, their uniforms identifying them as part of the Atrium’s food team. Any chance the new guests might have had of a warm welcome crumbled as the children registered what had happened, their shouts of disapproval instant.

“It’s alright my little sunspots, it’s alright! We can finish the story another time, I promise!” 

Sun did his best to console the children, but they were having none of it. Chrys attempted to nudge Marigold off her lap in order to help him get the situation under control, but even she fought with her. 

“No! I wanna hear what happens next! What is the prince gonna do, what happened to the gardener’s daughter?”

“Yeah! We were just getting to the good part with all the spooky stuff!”

A little boy shouted in support of Marigold, prompting others to follow suit. Sun sighed, and popped the microchip out from the back of his head, making it clear that the time for storytelling was done. A chorus of dejected “awww’s” rang out. 

“Now kids, don’t you know that stories are meant to be read in bits and pieces! That’s why we have bookmarks, after all.” He stood, gesturing for everyone to stand. “Right now it’s time for pizza and cake, and presents! Aren’t you all getting hungry?” A few kids nodded their heads. “So, let’s all go put our shoes back on, and keep the fun going! I promise the story will still be here when you get back.” 

At his word, the majority of the kids obeyed, their frowns slowly dissipating as they scuttled towards the cubicles by the front doors. Marigold gave one last pout before climbing out of Chrys’s lap and followed behind the others. Having had the extra weight sitting on her for some time, Chrys struggled to stand, grunting like an old lady as uncomfortable tingles flowed through her legs. 

Sun stopped and reached a hand out, to which Chrys took eagerly. He pulled her to her feet with hardly any effort at all, another reminder of how much hidden strength those gangly limbs held.  

“Thanks,” Chrys said, wiping the wrinkles from her pants. “Interesting uh, story there, Mr. Narrator. Can’t say I heard that one growing up.”

“I believe it! You know, I’ve read each and every book we have here dozens of times over, and this one is completely new to me! No idea where she found it.”

Chrys laughed. “Watch it be some creepy magic book or something, poofed here out of nowhere to haunt the daycare.” She wiggled her fingers and made a parody of a spooky sound.

“Oh, don’t put that extra responsibility on me. I don’t know how to count inventory for a book that can vanish at will.”

They followed behind the children’s trail, the majority having already gotten their shoes on and standing in a line by the door, likely a habit from school. The few who remained hurried to catch up, struggling to tie their laces. Chrys and Sun split, assisting all who needed it until everyone was ready to go.

“Alright my little sunbites! Off you go! Eat all the things! And when you come back, there will be a special surprise waiting for you all! Now have fun!”

The staff waiting at the entrance, arms crossed and faces painfully bored, slunk off the door frames they leaned on and started the line moving out of the daycare. Sun waved them all off before turning to face her. 

“Chrys, why don’t you go with them? Get yourself something to eat too. I can handle the changeover here.”

She furrowed her brows. “Wait, you sure? I’m alright, I ate already, remember?”

Sun sighed, and cocked a single, swirly brow at her, his face and voice uncharacteristically deadpan. “A protein bar, a cheese stick, and a cup of fruit do not a meal make. You need something more substantial, and we won’t get another break before the party is over. So no butts!” 

He booped her nose, a reflection of her tactic from earlier, and ended the conversation with a smug smile. She made a humorous, mouthy sound, and playfully batted his hand away, prompting an even cheekier grin to plaster Sun’s face. He wasn’t giving her an inch. She rolled her eyes with a smile, but still acquiesced to his demands without fuss. Truth be told, she wouldn’t have thought to deny him anyway, but he needn’t know that. 

“Alright, alright. As you wish, good sir.” She walked backwards, giving him a spirited bow with a forehead salute before returning to a normal posture, and picked up her pace to catch up with everyone else as the last few kids rounded the corner.

[pagingdoctorbedlam]

“Wish I Knew You When I Was Young”: Ebenholz, Czerny, and the Romantic Aftermath of Lingering Echoes

I need to ramble about Ebenholz, Czerny, and why this ship (which I’ve dubbed Czernholz) has rocketed right into OTP land for me. If you want some analyses on character, story themes, and Why The Musical Germans Should Smooch, step right up.

First off, let's talk about some parallels, because hoo boy do these lads have them. First off, let's look at how similar their fates were before joining Rhodes Island:

Physically trapped. Ebenholz was first trapped in the orphanage as an experiment, and then was locked up in the Spire. Meanwhile Czerny spent most (if not all) of his life trapped in the Afterglow, and as his oripathy worsened, spent an increasing amount of time housebound.

Pawns in the games of nobles. Czerny has to dance to the tune of Gertrude and other sponsors so he can maintain the resources to support himself and the rest of the Afterglow. Nobles groomed Ebenholz into the part they wanted him to play, and only through his own savvyness did he avoid falling into deeper traps of alcoholism and other weaponized luxuries.

Unwitting figureheads of a cause. Ebenholz is obvious, being the vessel of the Witch King's Voice, with cults after him for the power he doesn't want to use. Meanwhile, Czerny is the representative of the Afterglow, the figurehead on which their hopes of music and freedom rests. Even though that's a more positive connotation, it's still a heavy burden.

Traumatic loss of loved ones. First off, they lost their parents young, with Ebenholz's parents being murdered after the Witch King's demise and Czerny losing his father at a young age and then his mother to Oripathy as a teenager (which also led to him contracting the disease and barring him from attending the academy that would've been his ticket out of the Afterglow). These specters return to not only haunt our musical lads, but those next closest to them too, as it is his own link to the Witch King that ultimately kills Kreide, while Czerny's closest friend passed from Oripathy.

With these similarities in place, these two had a lot in common even before the events of Lingering Echoes, where these lads went from bickering their heads off to being ready to sacrifice their lives for each other. How they got to this point is also important. Czerny called out the worst of Ebenholz's habits, but also noted that he could do better, he still had the potential to change. At this point, Czerny fully believed he was close to dying, but he saw the potential in Ebenholz and that he could do so much more with his life. Beautiful! And once Ebenholz takes these words to heart (plus all his time with Kreide), our goat boy does open up and become more selfless.

You will note that, throughout Lingering Echoes and his operator record, Ebenholz is a dynamic character who changes and grows, seeing as he's the protagonist of these stories. Czerny spends most of these stories as a static character; we learn more about him as the stories progress, but who he is and how he acts doesn't change...that we can see. It won't until he joins Rhodes Island and has the chance to process all of what happened: that he survived, all the fear and other emotions his near-death experience unlocked, and all the implications these had. (I have ranted at length about these before, so if you want more light reading, check 'em out).

"Okay Doc," you say as you read this, "these are some cool parallels and story notes on these boys. But this doesn't explain to me why they are oh so clearly in love."

To which I say "hold ON I am GETTING THERE just stay with me."

Before I continue with the text, I do want to quickly note one element of their dynamic that I'm sure others have considered at least unconsciously, and that is the age gap. Or the assumed one.

See, we don't actually know how old either of the lads are. For Ebenholz, we only know he's the age of a University student, and that he'd be old enough to run Urtica on his own but was manipulated out of this by the nobles. For Czerny, we know he's older than 21 because that's the age he revealed Morgen und Abend and that happened...an indeterminate number of years ago. We can surmise from this that both of them are adults, and we can assume that Czerny is older than Ebenholz, but not by a large amount. Seeing as Czerny doesn't show many signs of age, I would assume he isn't that old; I'd pin him as mid 30's at most, but a musician can achieve worldwide fame in a short span of time. (I mean, look at the Beatles. Their entire career spanned about 10 years.)

So sure, call Czerny a dilf if you must, but I don't think any potential age gap between him and Ebenholz is that intense. In any case, I think that element of "older, experienced, and a bit resigned vs young, vibrant and ready to explore the world" is an important part of their dynamic, as you'll see further on.

Now, let us proceed!

After the concert itself, the lads don't get to talk much in Lingering Echoes proper. In fact, Czerny even remarks that he hasn't seen much of Ebenholz since they joined Rhodes Island (because they both need to grieve what they've lost — Kreide, the Afterglow, leaving the only homes they ever knew even if they were cages — in different ways. Also because Czerny was in so much medical hell). However! There is still one important turning point in their relationship, and that's in Ebenholz's Operator Record. If you haven't already read it, give it a readthrough here: https://arknights.fandom.com/wiki/Ebenholz/Operator_Record

See how they trust each other and talk openly with each other. See how Czerny finally opens up to Ebenholz that he's having a hard time, both physically and emotionally. Not something you'd tell a "coddled noble" you barely trust. But note at this point that Czerny has determined he can't do anything to help the Afterglow after all music has been banned.

And how does he react when he later hears Ebenholz breaking these rules to perform for the silenced residents?

"Ebenholz?! The one who brought music back to the Afterglow... was you?! On behalf of the entire Afterglow, thank you... But please, stop that right now! Your situation is already dire!"

Two points here. One, THIS is the exact moment, to me, when Czerny falls right the hell in love. How could he not? Ebenholz has thrown off his old self as a selfish noble and has not only become an Infected commoner physically, but emotionally. He's using the last of his privelage to give voice and song to those who've been silenced. Which brings us to point two: Czerny is so thankful for this, realizing how much it means, but he is far more concerned for Ebenholz's own safety. In a way, Czerny is finally being selfish in a small way: he'd rather protect this one person important to him, over the whole district he's spent his entire life supporting.

Aaaah my heart.

Alright, so that's what the text gives us of their relationship. Which is already a lot, but where do they go from here? What can we surmise, and how does it lead to that romance my heart so dearly craves?

Along with their parallels listed above, our Leithanian lads share a common theme in their archives and dialogue as their trust levels increase, and that is growth and recovery. As I've rambled about before, Czerny is (slowly) trying to get his health back in order with the unexpected extra time he has left to live, and he's also working to grow as a musician, but he also has a lot of emotions to wrestle with, especially fear. Meanwhile, Ebenholz comes to process his grief for Kreide, become the hero he needed as a kid by rescuing children from a different experimental orphanage, and taking pains to make friends at the book club. As part of this process, both of them reach out to Hibiscus (though Ebenholz initially runs from this development). They're confronting the sources of their respective traumas and learning to move forward with their lives.

This means, inevitably, these two are going to need to talk to each other. They are the only two surviving performers of Licht und Schatten. They are the only two who have stood up to the remnants of the Witch King and lived to tell the tale. And again, they were both ready to sacrifice their own lives to save each other.

So let them talk. Let them both embrace their passion and sincerity by opening up to each other. Let Ebenholz talk about how much it hurt to lose Kreide, where Czerny can comfort him because he's faced that same sort of loss before. Give Czerny the chance to admit how terrified he is, how he doesn't know how to cope with all these emotions, and let Ebenholz listen and maybe even recall his own fear from his time at the orphanage, which he only survived through the kindness of Kreide and others. Give them the chance to realize that their circumstances are far closer than they realized, and that maybe they can help each other recover and move on together.

With being so similar yet different, I find myself drawn to the idea of them coming to lean on each other. You've got Czerny with more experience but who'd been resigned to an early grave and is taking his sweet time breaking out of old habits to embrace what he now has. You've got Ebenholz rushing into this world he's only ever seen from his lonely Spire, with so many gaps from his sheltered experience to overcome but is charging ahead with a passionate heart. I love to imagine how they compliment each other in these ways. Ebenholz dragging Czerny out to go exploring and meet people. Czerny giving Ebenholz a chance to hone his own skills instead of the Witch King's, stepping in to smooth things over when Ebenholz trips over things from his old upbringing. The occasional argument born from misunderstandings and differing opinions — they're both incredibly passionate men with tempers they're still learning to reign in — but they always end up reaching an understanding with each other.

Whether you call their relationship romantic or something else, they end up with this emotional intimacy, an understanding and trust unique to the two of them. They give each other hope. They support each other.

And yeah, there's this potentially tragic element too. While they both have Oripathy now, Ebenholz's star is arguably still on the rise, while Czerny's decline is slowed but nowhere near halted. He's given his farewell concert and while his overall health is better for the moment, his infection isn't going to reverse. Unless something goes horribly wrong in a mission, or a miracle cure is discovered in time, these lads are stuck in a downward spiral and they both know that Czerny will be the first to crash and burn. Their time is limited. But unlike all their other losses, they're aware of this limit ahead of time, they see the parting on the horizon.

That makes it all the more precious, doesn't it? There isn't time to hold back or dance around their feelings. Whatever's going on between them, they have to embrace it and each other for all they're worth, before it all slips away. Their love is like a live concert, a performance that only happens once and can never be repeated once it closes.

...well, that's about that. How I fell for the Czernholz ship, how I view it (which you can see in the content I create for it) and why I need more people to jump on this bandwagon and talk about it with me because there is so much damn potential for these two.

[faeriekit]

nico di angelo

Ask game: 10 headcanons about a character!

Nicooooooo!!

For reference, please remember that I only read the original Percy Jackson series, and abandoned HOO once I realized it didn't have enough Percy and I got emotionally fatigued from the lack lmao

In a modern/mortal AU fic, he would have been a yugioh kid. Hands down. Catch him behind the school with a deck and a tournament in progress.

He probably needs a specialty shampoo/conditioner for his hair, and doesn't use one or know he ought to use one

Has a hot topic points reward account he always forgets about

Would be fascinated by the Sweeney Todd movie. I don't think he'd like it? But like in the way you spend all your time thinking about it?? Like two months later he's still asking people questions about "so what I don't get is-"

Rich dad, still thrifts.

See above, he probably thrifts stuff that reminds him of his original time- whether or not that's conscious or not, who knows. But.

Had an embarrassing crush on someone in a boy band for a while, and then completely forgot about it until someone brought it up years later.

"I JUST LIKED THE MUSIC!!" LIAR.

I think someone tried to convince him the ninja turtles were real and that they actually do live in New York. He totally didn't believe them...definitely not...but maybe he checks the sewer grates every time he visits NYC...

I'm missing one

Aaaaaaaaaaa considering the kids were in a school. And there might be just one modern school pic of his sister. He would probably take extra good care of it. It would live in a wallet or a locket he thrifted. And there would be an ever-present anxiety that, if it was ever lost- if he was alone and got pickpocketed, if a monster got his bag, if he dropped it- the only picture he had of his family would be gone forever.

Ey, thanks for playing! 😄

[taldigi]

hee hee hoo hoo I cant wait to see the felinette fucks get all discoursey again

The problems with adrienette started with felinette, and had felinette gone forward, it would have been bad- or possibly more toxic in a different direction- since Felix was never framed as a "pure and innocent sunshine boy" as the show seems to frame Adrien.

Cat's issues regarding nonchalance for his role as a hero and nonstop harassment of Ladybug stem from the original concept, of which was never re-framed to fit the new version of the deuteragonist until it became a roadblock for progressing an already-sluggish story.

Felinette was going to be bad because the show was still going to be written in the direction- and with the philosophy- that Marinette's suffering and misfortune was humorous. And while Adrien Agreste has, at least, the excuse of abuse and ignorance on his side, Felix did not. And from there, I can state, firmly. That Felinette would have been no better than Adrienette.

The idea that PV would have been "better" stems from the fact that, with a more serious (not darker, not more mature, but a more serious) tone, the show may have approached the story differently- and with less freedom to create more-for-lower-quality-3D episodes, the show may have compacted more of it's story into less episodes, resulting in a firmer progress of character development.

However, in the end, this is a result of writing and direction. Felix would have been no better than Adrien, I agree wholeheartedly. But he would have not been worse, either. The show would have still been spearheaded by the same folk who would have picked people to write the story as it matches their morals, humor, and vision for what the show would be. And if those people ultimately made the decision for titty physics on a 13-year old characters, skintight spandex on every little girl in the show, and sexual harassment/teenage girls are stupid and irrational humor then these people would have written Felix as shit because they write Adrien as shit.

And this also means that Fathom, or Luka, or whatever other character they could have decided on would be shit too- had they had made it canon instead of the LS. The same humor would have been draped over it- Luka, white savior, here to save Marinette from silly girl problems with his guitar and nonchalance- laughing at her every mistake and using his man powers to fix it. Look- My point is that he problem isn't adrienette, or marivanily, or kagaminette or lukanette-- its that the writing makes everything it touches toxic via marinette's humiliation becasue that is a CORE ELEMENT OF THE SERIES.

But Adrien was written, and Felix was not. It's hard for some people to really see that. Hell, some people can't see the difference between Pre-canon Felix(who is actually Adrien and PV Felix was named Adrien) and Felix Fathom. So of course people are going to make that claim- that Felix was going to be better. So while we have theories and what ifs, we don't have a solid statement on how old Love Square would have turned out. But we do have canon love square, we have six seasons of it.

But, you know what? Felix was not written. So I will write him instead, and I will write him better. I will write Felinette to be the way I always wanted Adrienette- except he wears a tie and is grumpy and has a punny name about being Lucky when he is not. Felix isn't Adrien- they changed him for a reason! I am interested in that version instead. I like to explore those what ifs. And if you're willing to put me down because of one thing or another outside of that, then get out of my space and leave me alone.

The only time anyone is ever wrong in this whole discussion is when they make the claim that PV = Fathom when actually PV = Adrien.

[genericpuff]

Ladies and gentlemen... we got 'em.

Every now and then, Rachel will post a sketch to her IG story or her page, oftentimes accompanied with a caption that states how hard at work she is.

Now, some of my pals and I in the UnpopularLO Discord have been taking note of the time stamps of when these get posted, so we could keep an eye out for when they inevitably show up in an episode. Normally I wouldn't be hyperanalyzing a creator's posting habits like this, but there's been a unanimous suspicion among the LO community that Rachel's buffer for LO is only a couple weeks ahead at any given time. So, we waited. We kept our eyes peeled for these panels to show. And hoo boy, are the results of this little experiment pretty damning.

The sketch on the left was posted to Rachel's IG about 4 weeks ago. It showed up in Episode 219, posted last week on October 29th.

The sketch on the right was posted to Rachel's IG story on October 27th. It showed up in this week's episode, November 5th, just a little over a week later.

I'm not gonna pretend like we know all the facts from this evidence alone, but again, people have been suspicious over this for a while now so seeing these finished drawings show up in the new episodes anywhere from a week to a month later tells us a lot. To lay out some of the brunt of it:

Whatever buffer Rachel has is small and shrinking fast. There was a 2 week break at the start of the season to "rebuild LO's buffer", and from cross-referencing the HxP make-out sketch and when the episode went up, we know that the buffer at one point was around 4 weeks. Most Originals creators are encouraged to have a buffer of 9-15 episodes, not episodes in progress, but actual finished episodes that are ready for posting, so that the series can still update with new episodes even if the creator needs to take a break for a week or two or if an emergency arises in their life. With the proof of last week's sketches showing up in last night's episode, I think it's highly probable we'll be seeing another 2 week break by the time December rolls around, but it will likely be presented under the guise of a "holiday break".

Rachel does the roughs at the last minute and nothing more. It's basically been confirmed at this point that Rachel's only contribution to the comic is the roughs and script. From former interviews and Patreon chit chat posts that allude to this, to the fact that the only progress pics from Rachel that we ever see are roughs, to the credits in every episode that feature upwards of five separate assistants working on each episode but somehow the comic still manages to have incredibly inconsistent plot threads and art that looks like it's been rushed, Rachel is basically just doing the roughs for her comic, writing/drawing one panel at a time, and passing them along to her assistants to finish at the last minute. This would account for the art being so inconsistent (Rachel's roughs likely aren't very polished and don't feature any sort of referencing or direction for the team), every episode now being made up of mostly copy+pasted panels, as well as it feeling so rushed, because the assistants literally don't have time to draw different shots or put the episode through any rounds of clean-up before submitting it.

Considering there are ALSO sketches of HxP fluff that haven't made it into an episode yet*, Rachel may as well be working on fluff content before she works on anything else. Just because that H x P panel was drawn 4 weeks prior to it being uploaded doesn't mean that's the buffer. She could have just as well drawn it first because it's what she felt like drawing and either shoehorned it in somewhere or just saved the 'boring' stuff for last. So either her buffer was only a month ahead of time at one point and has since shrunk back down to 1-2 weeks, or she's working on new episodes a week at a time and saves the 'boring' stuff for last hence why each episode ends up with so many repeated copy+paste panels and drawn out dialogue. Both scenarios are terrible and indicative of a creator who is both clueless and doesn't give a shit.

Rachel spends an absurd amount of time on social media. Between her Instagram and Twitter (both of which are often chock full of re-shared fan content that has the Lore Olympus hashtag on it) her new Tiktok account, her VERY strictly moderated FastPass FB groups (that she is an administrator for so she can lock any thread that has a hint of criticism in it**) and her Discord, Rachel seems to spend the majority of her time stalking her favorite hashtags and retweeting them (I've literally had some of my own fanart pieces retweeted within SECONDS of me posting them). But she'll still put out Tiktok videos talking about how behind she is and how hard she's working - literally working on episodes the week they're due as we've proven - videos that she's clearly spending time away from her comic to make and that she's sticking around in afterwards to check the stats and respond to comments from her fans. It's great that she's sharing fanart from her readers, but not so great if she's doing it so much that it's eating into her time to develop the very comic they're creating fanart for.

Hot take, but I can't help but feel that Rachel can only afford to not give a shit about her workflow and how she manages her team because she's in the top 1% of creators. Believe me, I've seen the stress building up in the WT Originals community from creators who are being vastly underpaid and overworked. None of them can afford to be so lazy with their work, because a single week without an episode for them means not paying the rent that month. They don't get mid-season hiatuses, they don't get 2 week 'buffer build' breaks, it's a constant grind of 12-18 hour days because if their series doesn't perform well, not only will they not get renewed for another season, but they likely won't even receive any FastPass revenue due to not hitting the 'threshold' they need to hit to receive it. This is not a problem for Rachel who is someone with millions of subscribers and thousands of regular readers checking in each week but also someone who we speculate got in on the FP program before they introduced the Minimum Revenue Threshold around 2020. Hence, she likely does not need to hit that threshold in the first place to receive her earnings. Every other Originals creator who is subject to the MRT system has to work their ass off and hope that Webtoons will give them enough promotion to draw in traffic to hit that threshold and not get cancelled - but those beneficial front-facing slots are often given to Lore Olympus every time it updates, often for an entire weekend at a time, while its creator fucks around on Twitter, gets mad at 'haters', talks about how busy and 'behind' she is, while she visibly miffs around with non-comic-production-related-things like making memes or rigging Vtuber models.

Let's just say, there's a reason why whenever there are Webtoon controversies concerning the state of their working conditions, you never see Rachel say a word. She is simply not affected by WT's current state of affairs so does not feel the need to speak up against it. I'm willing to bet the only time we'll ever see Rachel talk 'bad' about Webtoons, it will be after she's inevitably driven her own image and comic into the ground.

Concerning *: Here are some sketches that haven't made it into any episodes yet. It's hard to tell if they will, I can assume the one on Twitter will show up but the other two could very well just be Rachel faffing about for fun. Either way, these exist and are still publically viewable, so if they DO show up in any future episodes, we can cross-reference them later.

Left: Oct 28th Middle: Nov 4th Right: Oct 29th

The following Hades panel will very likely show up in the upcoming November 12th FastPass episode. If it does, that not only tells us Rachel truly is only working on these episodes 1-2 weeks ahead at a time, but also that she's working on them out of order as this FINISHED drawing showed up BEFORE the UNFINISHED Persephone sketch from above showed up in her IG story - with its respective finished drawing showing up literally a week later.

Concerning **: Rachel is literally an administrator in the official LO FastPass group on Facebook, which wouldn't be an issue if she weren't so anal about any perceived slight against her work. She will literally lock any thread that doesn't make her look good.

And her own interactions with these fans posts may as well be borderline psychotic. She'll either immediately refute any amount of fan theories on the spot (destroying any semblance of discussion or fun theorizing to be had) or just... comment really messed up shit that says a lot about her and how she writes her precious cinnamon roll protagonist.

Fun fact, she got banned from a FB group that memes on LO because she tried to harass the administrators of the group to ban all criticism. The admins banned her instead. It's not really relevant to this post but I wanted to say it anyways because it's fucking hilarious.

***EDIT TO ADD: She didn't just get banned, she was so butthurt over it that she apparently bitched about it in her Patreon, which her cult accepted as permission to go after members of this same FB group. All just for not kissing the ground RS walked on. Literally psychotic cult behavior.

Let's Play creator mongie has done similar things, so this seems to just be a general attitude among the top-earning creators on WT (yikes), but that's another topic.

Concerning the actual topic at hand, the last thing I'll mention is, save for the credits at the end of each episode, Rachel barely ever gives her assistants credit when she goes on rants about how "busy" she is or how "successful" she's become. You'll never see her thank her assistants or give them credit for how easy they're making her life that she can get away with doing the roughs at the last minute and spend the rest of her time talking about her dog, showing off her new gel nails, or talking about how much of a workaholic she is. But she sure as shit will throw her assistants under the bus whenever she has to come up with an excuse for the sloppy inconsistent art.

TL ; DR: Rachel is not 'busy'. She's just incredibly bad at managing her deadlines and team of assistants and would literally rather whine about how behind she is to make it sound like she's pressed for time. Which, she absolutely is. But it's not because of Webtoons or because LO is a hard comic to put together, it's literally her own undoing. You know what they say - it takes way more work to pretend to look busy than it does to actually do your job.

Rant over.

[hermit-gem-au]

So…

I’m alive…

A year and a half is waaaayy too long to have left the people who follow this AU hanging…

You all deserve an explanation and I’m gonna give it to you.

Every so often I’d remember this blog and this AU, but have never really found it in myself to really come back to it.

I still adore Hermitcraft, but nowadays find myself being a more casual fan than anything. I’ve been focusing on a different fandom for a good while and I haven’t really been watching Hermitcraft since mid Season 8, but recently started watching a handful of Hermits such as GoodTimesWithScar again and hoo boi I’ve missed a lot. Maybe too much.

I’ve also gotten busier the more I’ve progressed in my university degree and find myself stretched thin with other projects, both educational and fandom, as it is.

My art style has also changed significantly, and I feel it no longer fits with the art I’ve done for the Hermit Gems.

For these reasons, I’m leaning towards either discontinuing the AU or passing on whatever notes still remain on it (that I can find) to somebody else so I can pass on the torch to another artist or writer.

This is not a decision I take lightly by any means. I loved working on this AU while I was doing it. But for the sake of closure, it’s time to move on and close the chapter…

So, this AU is on indefinite hiatus until further notice…

If you would like to become the new artist or writer for the Hermit Gem AU, or just want to talk about it, drop me a line in the @hermit-gem-au ask box. If possible, send in a piece of artwork or writing, preferably involving the AU characters.

Take care all and stay safe out there! :)

[astromechs]

hello lovely! 3, 12 and 20 for the year in review thingy? <3

3. what’s something you learned about yourself as a writer?

i'm a weenie; this is what i learned. fucking myself up over almost killing a beloved character, like, man. i could kill a character if a story demanded it but hoo boy i'm gonna be upset about it!!

i think the other thing i'm learning is how much more i get accomplished as i get more and more comfortable with the concept of allowing imperfectness to exist; i'm a recovering perfectionist so this has kinda been ongoing for a while, but i'm seeing real progress on that front. focused writing sprints really work well for my tendency to hyperfocus, and when i read back over what i write in those sprints, i actually generally end up keeping most of it. so it's like... i can trust myself. i'm getting there. it's cool.

12. what fic was the most difficult to write? did you finish it?

i have a couple of answers for this, and one is a published fic and one is one i haven't finished and published yet. the unfinished/unpublished fic is one i've had to write in very small pieces because, i'll disclose, it's been hitting on beats that are getting a little Real at a time when my mental health hasn't been, like, the most stellar, so facing my own feelings by proxy has been a bit Yikes lol but i'm gonna get it finished because for all those reasons, it's also good. this is so vague, but 😂

as far as finished fic? show me how it ends was difficult because it hurt me to hurt jyn that much. see previous answer, i'm a weenie.

20. share your favorite ending line

from it's only you (who can tell me apart):

It could almost be relief. But it’s a lie, she knows, that they’re both pretending to believe for each other.

fan fic 2023 in review!

[clownfire]

Spoilers for episode 14 of Prime Defenders, below cut!

I’m totally normal about William turning intangible as he goes into shock, as if he’s subconsciously withdrawing so that he doesn’t have to feel his body anymore, so that he can’t be hurt again. I’m totally normal- 

These last three episodes went for my fucking jugular dude, but I am really excited about the direction things are going! 

FINALLY MORE DAKOTA BACKSTORY YES!! I’d love to learn more about the Doctor and why Dakota specifically was chosen for this. It seems like the -izlys have something cool all written out that they haven’t gotten the chance to bring up before, and trying that together with the Will angst(s) going on was I good segway into that.  It was nice to see the emotional intelligence that Dakota and Vyncent displayed as they tried to console Will, they both went about it in slightly different ways and I’m glad it wasn’t one contributing more than the other.

The statue talk was really interesting, talking about the idolisation of heroes, what makes a ‘hero’ and what are good motivations for being one. Mini-theory time, but I do think the PD are going to go down a vigilante path. Whilst Dakota is a lot more trusting of the hero system than Vyncent or Will, in season one he clearly showed frustration in how restricted their actions were: times where he ignored the warnings and instruction of pro-heroes because he so strongly believes in his moral obligation to save as many people as possible. I could go on way longer about this, but I’ll make that it’s own post.

Now for the GhostKnife confirmation, my first thought was ‘holy shit they’re actually doing this for real’. I have the same sentiment as a lot of people on here who’ve discussed this so far, but having ghostknife be slow-burn leading to an eventual end-game works better for this series (and honestly could tie into that theme Charlie mentioned he wanted to cover in the Just Rolled, but put a pin in that). Will’s got a stupid amount on his plate rn, so I think he’s going to compartmentalise his crush and push it aside for now (but that is going to be difficult with Cantrip around, hoo boy), as it appeared to him that his crush wasn’t reciprocated. The whole scene was the perfect way to canonise and incorporate the relationship into the story proper. Reiterating the status-quo: Awkward tension, Will’s perceived romantic rivalry with Cantrip, and everyone but Vyncent being fully aware of what’s going on. Dakota sending Vyncent out specifically to console Will, recalling the 10 months they spent together. A big dramatic gesture that pushes William to open up and allow himself to be physically and emotionally vulnerable again, mirroring the scene in season one where Vyncent fell in the gymnasium and Will tried to catch his fall. William reaches out to make the first move, and his hesitation and shame stop him from committing to the kiss. Progress has been made - William made a genuine attempt to make the first move - but this is totally in character for the both of them for where they are emotionally right now. However, while Vyncent is currently unaware of Will’s feelings for him, this scene makes it evident how completely he trusts Will, and how deeply he values him and their relationship. 

Getting back to that pin. In the Just Rolled for this episode, Charlie mentioned a theme that he wanted to explore with William that they haven’t covered in the show before. My best guess would be shame (or fear in general); William is ashamed of his powers, and his use of them is very limited, especially after Ashe’s disappearance. He doesn’t understand why and is abhorred by how his powers affect his body and make him different from other people. This shame could be extended to his crush on Vyncent. I don’t know if the crew would be willinging to discuss homophobia, biphobia, and potentially religious trauma in their silly-goofy superhero podcast to any extent, but William could be afraid of ‘ruining his friendship’ with Vyncent, or feel - with Will’s self-esteem as low as it is - that he doesn’t deserve Vyncent.

Anyways, that was an essay and a half. A lot happened.