#honestly serve

[comicavalcade]

Has any love interest ever had a better introduction than Betty Dean?

[glassrooibos]

FABIAN DON’T DO THAT. THAT’S SCARY.

[letsplaythermalnuclearwar]

Homer!Odysseus and Epic!Odysseus would try to kill each other if they ever met

[sparticus2000art]

Here’s the bad sanses as team rocket (with nightmare as Giovanni)

It was originally going to be a bit of a shit post but I got a little too into it

Based on a joke from a cjdoesva stream

Nightmare by jokublog

Killer by rahafwabas

Dust by ask dusttale

Horror by sour apple studios

Cross by jakei

[tinynerdycthulu]

blah blah blah moshang/bingqiu fic that seems like your stereotypical bodyguard/noble fic but no one realizes shang qinghua is the noble and shen yuan is actually just the third son of a mildly prestigious family who became a knight.

shang qinghua is arranged to be married to mobei-jun and luo binghe, mbj's assistant, is the one whoe escorts him and his knight sy to the castle. the journey is pretty long so they end up talking to each other and luo binghe somehow comes to the conclusion that shen yuan is the prince.

shang qinghua doesnt bother to correct him and he orders cucumber-bro not to. to him it makes sense because hes not really princely. plus he can admit shen yuan is extremely unintentionally seductive and lbh is clearly already smitten anyway. plus its super fucking funny to see cucumber-bro completely oblivious to lbh's desperate pining.

(luo binghe's inner monologue: i can't,,,he's my lord's betrothed,,,but he's so kind,,,so lovely,,,i must Resist my base urges,,,)

anyway they finally make it to the palace and lbh is crushed that shen yuan doesnt seem sad at all (is he just fine with marrying a complete stranger? even his bodyguard is sadder than he is!)

before the "official meeting" shang qinghua literally runs into mobei-jun. b/c he's gotten into the bodyguard role he immediately prostates himself and apologizes. cue shock from lbh when mobei-jun falls over himself (well, reaches down 1% quicker than usual) to help his fiance up.

lbh: is my lord smitten with...the ugly rat man? ths servant? when yuan-ge is right there???

(yes they've dropped honorifics, they dropped honorifics like 1 day into the journey bc shen yuan doesnt know what boundaries are)

mobei-jun for his part is completely perplexed. shang qinghua is obviously his future empress, who else would it be?

lbh ofc doesnt care about the whole trickery thing once he realizes he can court shizun to his hearts desire.

bonus cumplane double wedding. everyone thinks mobing were the ones who arranged it because cumplane get into a violent fight during the feast. actually luo binghe cried for 10 straight hours at his shizun's feet trying to convince him to change his mind.

[garykingz]

[buscemifan]

“ok but you guys better not be cunty cher and nicolas cage when i get there”

our dumb asses:

[mobius-m-mobius]

Maybe he wants to mix it up. Sometimes you get tired of playing the same part. Is that possible? He can change?

The Avengers (2012) // Loki (2021 - )

[jkvjimin]

❝so wouldn't it make sense if I was yours and you could call me your baby but we say we're just, say we're just friends, just for now❞

FRI(END)S by V of BTS

[lenin-it-to-win-it]

im making text post memes for the whole student council but nanami gets her own post bc shes gods specialest little princess

[alphaketoglutaricacid]

The bell shuro gives laios is such an elegant piece of symbolism. Laios immediatly stows it away but it's jingling at the bottom of his bag (and mind) the whole time as the crew enters the most isolated section of the story.

Rescuing Falin was the first thing shuros ever wanted or asked for and Laios return pushes him to be more and more proactive abt his desires. On Shuros side, its constantly ringing, out of his control, and annoying to him and everyone around him. Despite being mortified w intruding on other people, he keeps it on him even when he sleeps. They both almost throw it away several times.

Thru the story its a little ambiguous what shuro feels about laios. IMO the dead giveaway is where he puts that bell:

At his heart!

[lostreverb]

bed chem (short n' sweet)

(colin zabel x fem!reader) your internship just got more interesting...

warnings / content: not really proofread, age gap (reader is 20-22, colin's like 32-34), swearing, perv!reader tbh, NSFW - masturbation (toys) + fingering (fem receiving), p in v

(this fic is a part of my short n' sweet collection!) a/n: every time i listen to this song i think of colin like he's just so... AHHHHHHHHHH i've literally had this idea since the album came out! tried to incorporate as many lyrics as i could idk how well i did tho!

--

the easttown police department wasn’t exactly a hub of thrilling action. that was probably a good thing for the town, but for you, it made the days of your internship drag endlessly. stuck behind a desk, processing minor domestic disputes and petty incidents, the hours stretched out. you couldn’t help but wish that, just once, you’d be allowed to join an officer out in the field. to witness a slice of the town's life up close instead of through dry reports. but no, you were stuck in the back office, relying on your imagination to fill in the blanks while you typed up incident after incident.

on this particular afternoon, you were making your way down the hallway with a precariously high stack of files balanced in your arms. you could feel the papers shift, hear the quiet rustle of their movement as they started to slide. panic gripped you briefly—this was going to be embarrassing. you were already imagining the cascade of documents scattering across the floor, how you’d have to drop to your knees and scramble to gather them up, probably while everyone watched. just as the stack tilted dangerously to one side, a hand swooped in, catching the top section before it could tumble.

"here, lemme help you with that," a man said, accompanied by a friendly smile. a smile too relaxed, too bright for this quiet, indifferent corner of pennsylvania.

grateful, you gestured toward your desk a few feet away. "thanks," you mumbled, trying not to sound too embarrassed as you placed the files down with a sigh of relief. he set the rescued papers down beside yours, glancing at you with a foreign look. like he actually saw you as a person instead of the intern that does the shit no one else wants to do.

"you doin' okay?" he asked. his concern seemed genuine, which again, took you a second to process.

"yeah! yeah, i'm good!" you responded, a little too enthusiastically perhaps, as you straightened the files in a futile effort to regain your composure. "thank you."

the man chuckled softly. "you know, sometimes it’s easier just to take the two trips." he shot you a wink that made your pulse quicken. "speakin' from experience," he added, leaning a little closer as if sharing a secret. "when i was in your shoes, i had to learn the hard way."

the chief called him over and, after a charismatic "duty calls" farewell, he walked off. you sat down at your desk, face hurting from the corners of your mouth being lifted for so long, but you couldn't bring them down.

you buried your face into your arms, letting your forehead rest against the cool surface of the desk for a few minutes. if anyone saw the flush creeping up your cheeks, you’d never hear the end of it. you took a deep breath, trying to shake off the feeling, willing yourself to get back to work. but the more you tried to focus, the more impossible it became.

why? because guess whose office was in clear view of your desk? mare's. and guess who was now in mare's office quite adorably rehearsing a conversation with himself?

yeah... you were done for.

the man's lips moved slightly as if he was practicing lines for a play, his brow furrowed in concentration, and every so often, he’d run a hand through his neatly cropped hair, or shake his head in disapproval, looking entirely too charming for his own good.

you needed to find out who he was right away. what was he there to talk to mare about? was he a detective? why couldn't you stop thinking about him pinning you against a wall?

unable to live with the mystery you pushed yourself up from your chair and marched over to the nearest officer, your pulse still racing. "hey—uh, hello." you cleared your throat, trying to sound casual despite the warmth still lingering in your cheeks. "who’s the cute guy in mare’s office? you know, uh.."

wide brown eyes, chiseled jawline..

"navy jacket- big briefcase."

the officer looked up, raising an eyebrow at your blunt description before glancing toward the office. "county guy chief brought in to help with the katie bailey case," he replied nonchalantly. "last name's zabel if i remember right."

you nodded, pretending like that was enough to satisfy your curiosity, but then another officer nearby chimed in with a smirk. "that’s him? poor guy’s gonna be in for it."

they quickly devolved into their own conversation, talking shop and completely forgetting you were even standing there. under normal circumstances, their dismissal might’ve bugged you, but you had bigger priorities now.

back at your desk, you grabbed your phone and opened up a browser, your fingers flying across the screen. within moments, you’d found him. detective colin zabel of delaware county. recently praised for solving a cold case involving a missing 10-year-old girl—a feat that had earned him respect in the force and beyond.

you couldn’t help but grin. of course he was the hero detective. it made perfect sense. but now that you knew who he was, it didn’t make the butterflies in your stomach any easier to ignore.

when mare had finally arrived, you watched the awkward interaction between the two of them. colin outstretched his hand only for her to disregard his formalities. you saw it coming, but it didn't make it any less painful to observe.

you waited until she had left (which wasn't very long) to discreetly travel over to the office. the door was open so you knocked on the frame.

"it's not personal. she's got a lot going on" you said with an understanding smile.

at the sound of your voice, colin turned around, giving a deflated chuckle towards your remark. "you er- saw that whole thing?"

"my desk is right there" you said, pointing, the two stacks of files barely touched. "sorry i kinda.. visually eavesdropped"

"no worries-" colin briefly smiled at your humorous confession then looked away. "uhhhhhh- did you need somethin'?"

"just wanted to introduce myself" you said, extending your hand out. "i'm y/n"

when he firmly took yours in his, your eyes couldn't help but flicker down and notice the veins that decorated them. a thought crossed your mind about where they might show up on other parts of his body.

"that's a pretty name"

you looked up from the grip your two hands were intertwined in, colin's attentive dark eyes on you.

"thank you.." you said softly, pulling away. shit, why were you out of breath? "uhm- i read about that... that case you solved? amazing work"

"oh- that was- i'm not-" he scratched the back of his head, trying to find words to minimize the accomplishment. you didn't know what was more attractive—hearing him stumble over his words or his humility. "we brought her home you know? that's what matters"

you nodded earnestly in response. "100%... well let me know if you need anythin'. i know people here can be a bit closed off but it's not all that bad."

"yeah thanks... nice to know i got a friend already" he smiled.

a friend... for now.

--

seeing as he was always in the back of your mind, and you couldn't care less about filling out reports, daydreaming about colin became your favorite past time. and every smile, every corny joke he greeted you with only fueled your crush.

it wasn't long before you noticed he had his eyes on mare, but the way he stared at you while you spoke about your criminology major... crossing his built arms, leaning forward on his desk to show you he was really listening. the way he'd routinely check on you and stop by your desk to chat....

for god's sake he started to get you coffee every morning.

there had to be something there... right? something more between you than mere camaraderie.

you definitely thought so. and thought about it often.. in bed.

eyes closed, you pictured colin's body hovering over yours. you could discern his toned figure from the form fitted button-ups he wore.. he'd have absolutely no problem picking you up and turning you over, manhandling you... though he probably wouldn't. he's too sweet for that. so sweet... and yet no ring? colin seemed like the type of man who should've had a wife and 2 kids by now...

maybe you could be the one to give that to him.

not now of course.

one day though.

still thinking of him you reached down into your panties, playing with your delicate folds in the caring manner you imagined him to have.

"so beautiful" he'd whisper, pumping two slick digits in and out of you at a sensual pace.

gasping moans escaped from your mouth as your fingers moved faster, the squelching sound of your fluids filling the room.

"that's it... god, i love how y'sound..."

belt unbuckled, he'd pull down his pants and boxers in one swift motion revealing his hard cock ready to drive into you. from underneath your bed you grab your dildo—oversized and veiny as colin would be and removed your now-soaked underwear.

he'd smile against your lips as he slotted himself between your legs, your body accommodating as he entered. after he'd ask (quite endearningly) if you're okay, you'd quickly nod, giving him permission to continue.

you try to imagine the expression of lust on his face... the sound of his deep groans in your ear as you fucked yourself gently, attempting to emulate your bodies rocking together in synced movement, the riveting sensation of the veins against your walls sending shockwaves through your body.

"fuck... oh my god" you panted, feeling the heat build up in your core. you were close.

"let go, i've got you... taking me like this, you're doing so well... makin' me feel so good..."

you increase the pace at which you pummel the dildo into your quivering cunt, eyes rolling back as you reach your climax, your body left trembling.

with colin, your sure you'd probably both arrive at the same time.

but for now you just had to live with unsatisfaction of not feeling his warm release coating your insides.

--

the next morning the chief had called you into his office.

a grin spread on your face as the he detailed the new program the department was implementing, how you'd finally be able to shadow an officer like you'd hoped when you first applied for the internship.

"any officer you have a preference to be paired with?"

you turned your head and caught colin's gaze through the office window. he was deep in conversation with mare, but when he noticed you, he gave a small wave. you smiled back, feeling a slight flutter.

"yeah, i’ve got someone in mind."

--

extra note: part two coming (hopefully soon!) it'll be based off the song "busy woman"!

tags (ask to be added or removed anytime!): @fear-is-truth @juliamaximoff @jazz-berry @violetsghosts @quickreider @tiffysdeath @honeymoon8

[wolfythewitch]

Hey I wanted to ask, one time you said you disliked the then-current drafts of 'not sorry for loving you' because of the calypso representation in them, so what do you think of the final product?

Hummm I mean tbh, it didn't change much from the drafts so my opinion remains largely the same haha. I think it could be an interesting attempt at manipulation? But my issue is specifically with the line "I love you. But not the way that you want me to." I saw some people say it could be him trying to placate her, but the thing is he leaves Immediately after, which would make trying to placate her not very useful. It's almost like a last word kind of thing? But it's crazy work for your last words to your captor to be I Love You

[distant-velleity]

“Show ‘em what you’ve got, alright?”

[SR] Yuhua Wei - Cheer Wear

event - "Go Go Night Raven!" ( @cheerleaderman )

the clumsy king of asymmetry and unwanted rambles joins the party~

(UI-less version and voicelines under cut!)

~

Summon: Cheerleading isn’t my forte, you know… But I don’t want to lose, either. 

Groovification: — LOCKED —

Set to Home Screen: Let’s see your spirit.

Home Transition 1: …Honestly… who came up with some of these chants? They’re— Oh, don’t mind me. 

Home Transition 2: I think this is the most school spirit I’ve seen anyone demonstrate in… well, ever. I guess the turnout was because it got turned into a competition?

Home Transition 3: Have you seen my poms anywhere? I swear, I left them just on the bleachers over there, but now they’re gone…

Home, after login: Slacking off? C’mon, don’t be like that. Let’s go practice.

Home Transition (Groovification): — LOCKED —

Tap Home 1: What do they call a straddle jump in cheerleading—toe touch? Yeah, I have those down pretty well. Aerials, kicks, leg holds, too… 

Tap Home 2: This armband is from Octavinelle. Something, something, advertising the Mostro Lounge… You get the idea. At least, that’s what I think it’s for.

Tap Home 3: I’ve never done cheerleading before, but I used to know people who did. From there, I just… absorbed a few things. ‘Course, it helps that I used to do competitive dance.

Tap Home 4: Hm… I wonder if I’ll be able to snatch a jacket from someone. What? I’m not plotting anything, I swear… not much, anyway.

Tap Home 5: H-Hey, this is for looking and not touching… Can you ask next time?

Tap Home (Groovification): — LOCKED —

~

taglist (ask to be added or removed): @thehollowwriter@theleechyskrunkly@elenauaurs@casp1an-sea@nahelenia

@skriblee-ksk@boopshoops@scint1llat3@nyx-of-night@nemisisnemi

@sillyslipperybananapeel@beneathsakurashade@kathxrat-01@lumdays@twistedwonderlandshenanigans

@taruruchi

[age-of-moonknight]

“Khonshu: Strikefile,” Moon Knight: Fist of Khonshu (Vol. 1/2024), #0.

Writer: Jed MacKay; Penciler and Inker: Alessandro Cappuccio; Colorist: Rachelle Rosenberg; Letterer: Cory Petit

[petercushingscheekbones]

The Deadpool fourth wall breaks are living up to my expectations