#honestly ANY of the options are valid reasons

[aacalienz]

I honestly get frustrated when low support needs people say that a professional diagnosis is a privilege. It’s true, but not in the way they think. Some of them are like “I need a professional diagnosis so I can finally get validation for myself and my needs.” But you don’t need a professional to validate you. I get why you want that, but you can validate yourself and take your own needs seriously. You don’t need a professional diagnosis for that.

Meanwhile there are people who desperately need a diagnosis for vital services and can’t get it due to cost. There are higher support needs autistic people who were visibly disabled as children who never got a diagnosis of autism or another developmental disability because of severe medical neglect.

I know people with higher support needs that have showed obvious signs of autism from VERY early childhood to the point schools repeatedly pointed it out. The parents never tested their children or listened to the schools’ concerns. I know a person with high support needs that was in and out of institutions their entire childhood and doesn’t have a diagnosis of autism because their adoptive parents hid or destroyed their medical records and tried to pretend they had a non disabled child.

These people are unable to get access to the services and supports they desperately need. They are left completely stuck. They can’t get disability benefits or paid support people because they don’t have a diagnosis. Most are only even alive because of a close partner takes care of them. If they had been diagnosed when they started showing obvious signs it would have been in early childhood or when they entered school.

A diagnosis isn’t a privilege for medium, high, and even some low support needs people. It’s a fucking necessity. When some medium and high support needs people don’t have a diagnosis they can die because they don’t have services and can’t care for themselves.

When a late diagnosed low support needs person who can mask very well and has a high paying white collar career doesn’t get a diagnosis they don’t get emotional validation and can’t wear headphones at work.

Ok I know that isn’t entirely accurate and I’m being harsh. I just want to show that the stakes are nowhere near the same. I know low support needs people struggle. But higher support needs people can literally die without support.

And when some people whine about “oh my precious validation” they miss the fucking point. They don’t understand how for lots of autistic people a diagnosis is the only way they can get support in any official way. When professional diagnosis is framed as a way to prove yourself right, instead of as a way to get services it hurts autistic people. Especially the most marginalized autistic people and autistic people who need a diagnosis out of necessity.

Also high support needs people who did get a diagnosis in early childhood are NOT privileged. The main reason they did get an early diagnosis is usually that their symptoms were so visibly disabling people couldn’t ignore it.

Calling a professional diagnosis a privilege feels like calling food or housing a privilege. Technically it is a privilege if you enough food because many don’t. But food is a RIGHT, not a privilege. Because it’s required for survival. For some autistic people a professional diagnosis is required for survival. So it’s not a privilege. It’s a right.

If anything making it until your 30s until anyone notices anything is wrong is the privilege. Because that means that your autism wasn’t causing a significant delay in milestones like talking, toileting or other activities. There may have still been some delays looking back, but they weren’t so obvious that everyone noticed and intervened.

So a professional diagnosis is necessary for lots of autistic people and framing it as a privilege makes it seem like it’s something you’re lucky if you have. But for many people a professional diagnosis is their only option. A diagnosis is a right. And people can die without one.

[aplpaca]

On one hand plastic fiber is bad for the environment and its production should be regulated imo but also like the way most of the posts talking about the issue are framed is really tiring and doen't sit super well with me bc theyre all "these fabrics are horrible and feel bad and we should only ever use natural fibers and nothing else and in a better society polyester wouldn't exist."

but like. I'm autistic and my main sensory issues are with touch and texture. I can't wear like 98% of clothes sold in stores bc the styles and fabrics set off my sensory issues and make me feel like I have to rip my skin off and break my skull against a wall. And a solid 75-90% of what I'm actually able to wear is polyester bc of how it stretches (for reference, polyester clothing is about 50-60% of the market). Pretty much everything I can wear that's not a generic cotton t shirt is largely polyester, and I have not found any natural fibers that are wearable for me without also incorporating polyester. Like I can honestly make an argument that access to polyester clothing is an accessibility issue for me. And there's no way I'm the only person this applies to.

So like. the framing of "and it's such a shitty bad-feeling fabric" as a reason to limit its use is just. literally not true for a lot of people (even those who don't have sensory issues. If no one thought it was comfortable, it wouldn't sell, my man). and also completely irrelevant to the actually important environmental issues.

also like. With addressing the environmental issues of polyester and other synthetic fibers, it should also come with consideration of like, either finding an environmentally friendly alternative that's *actually* a valid alternative in terms of texture, stretch/behavior, and utility. or, in the absence of an alternative, finding a way to reduce the production of and reliance on polyester without making it impossible for those who can't tolerate other options to find clothing that works for them and doesn't make them feel like they're physically combusting

And "polyester bad shitty fabric and I hate it i love you linen uwu" does neither of those things (also I fucking hate you linen). like. If I could wear 100% natural fiber pants, I would. But I literally can't do that without having a meltdown. So until that issue is addressed, the "just wear natural fibers"/"we need to only use natural fibers" type of clothing sustainability campaigning unfortunately isn't accessible to me and others with similar issues

[queenvhagar]

It’s hilarious when TBs cry “Rhaenyra TRAINED to be heir” because that honestly makes her look worse. Wdym she spent 20 years training and managed to fuck things up more than Aegon, who got pulled out of the trash 2 days ago?

Legitimately and it's why nerfing the Greens was such a dumb choice 😭

Like what do you mean you apparently trained your whole life (which btw spending years away from court hiding from bastard rumors "managing" Dragonstone is not really training for ruling an entire kingdom, especially when it comes to navigating political realities when in power) (but then again that's something she no doubt figured she could ignore in favor of ruling with hardcore fire and blood and fear of dragons and Daemon)

Like apparently you "trained your whole life" for this and you're somehow the only one divinely ordained and suited and qualified enough to rule...

AND YET SOMEHOW up against these apparently incompetent, short-sighted, impulsive Greens, who are made up of:

- a drunk dude who's apparently never been trained to rule despite him ruling being the plan since he was a baby, who appoints his unqualified and unnamed frat boys to Kingsguard, bullies his brother in public, drunk flies his dragon to battle, and executes a dozen dudes for "no reason" causing a "PR disaster"

- a kinslayer attempted kingslayer who took out one of his side's only dragons and rider because he got bullied :( and now he hates his brother and wants power and also he's gonna nuke a village for no reason except to feel powerful and manly I guess... also he unfairly does nothing about Rhaenyra's blockade and it's HIS fault people are starving from the blockade apparently and that's why the common people LOVE Rhaenyra SO much

- the dowager queen who converted to Team Black out of sapphic longing for a woman she was friends with decades ago for a couple of years, who willingly sells out her entire family to the enemy, including the son she crowned, two other sons fighting for the war she started, her father who was her only ally at court, her brother who was the only one to sympathize with her position, her sworn shield who lives to serve her and protect her family, her uncle and his men leading the Hightower host out of Oldtown, most of her family's dragons who will die defending their riders... all for the chance to win the favor of a woman who never showed any ounce of care for how her life turned out and the sacrifice she made (in fact the woman who was remorseless about her son's eye getting cut out, who blatantly pushed lies that endangered her whole family, who married a man who hates her whole family and wants them dead) (she fails in winning her favor) but girls stick together - girl power! And she's finally free from the confines of medieval feudalist patriarchy :) (except there's nowhere for her to go and no way to live her life as a free woman in any capacity as the wife of the former king and a highborn lady, unless she wants to try to be a survivalist in the wild or go to Essos and join a pleasure house, which, again, not really "free" and sustainable long term options for her)

- a poor helpless infantalized neurodivergent woman who can't even ride her dragon because she doesn't like it for some reason and she's incapable of acting outside of autistic stereotypes, also she's totally fine about her 6 year old getting murdered in front of her very eyes now, and actually she's gonna use her visions to condemn the brother who's always had her family's back up until this point and instead help the man responsible for her child's death, because she's seen the Grand Design and wants to help Team Black now :)

- "misogynist incel" but somehow also at the same time "Alicent worshipping and unreasonably Rhaenyra hating sex toy" (don't think about why he might have valid reasons to hate this particular woman) who doesn't think ahead and is apparently the most violent terrible hypocritical person in this show (don't think too hard about the show making him Dornish and casting a brown actor and the implications it has for this character on and off screen because the show and mainstream fandom won't!)

- offscreen brother nobody barely remembers who only just started riding his dragon apparently

- former Hand of the King immediately fired and sent away and captured off screen after doing nothing to help the war effort apparently

- Lannister twin off to Essos to fuck several wives and mud wrestle LOL!!

- foot fetishist shadowy creep (don't think about how they made a disabled character have a fetish involving their disability for no reason)

AND YET SOMEHOW against THESE villains... she can't even beat them 😭 she can't beat THESE guys who at this point are actively helping her out... she can't take and hold the throne against THESE Greens...

Like way to just completely make her and her team look equally incompetent by failing to take on THESE foes and instead elect to... mope... complain... do nothing except what others tell you to do... basically make no real decisions of your own except... dress as a nun and sneak into enemy territory with no real plan, leaving nobody in charge while you're gone despite a war looming... and burn a group of people alive for no reason to get dragons that you immediately refuse to use... ride dragon... speak a foreign language... cry... kiss your advisor immediately after she opens up about being violently assaulted and mutilated and never bring it up again... girlboss 💪💅

Truly astounding how badly they managed to fumble the bag with the show. Like. My god 😭 THIS was your vision for the historic Dance of Dragons aka the worst civil war in Westerosi history where both sides were Targaryens with dragons who destroyed each other and the Realm in their quest for power? Like THIS is what the singers in mainline ASOIAF books were singing about? 😭😭😭 bruh 😭😭😭

[unholy-virtue]

Here's a hot take:

I know that Azula losing her bending (I mean Avatar taking it from her as punishment) is commonly used to redeem her, but I honestly feel that it would make her worse instead of better.

Aside from the fact that Aang, who typically refuses to mess with spirit and energy bending stuff and only uses it as a last resort, would not do that to her if he didn't see any other option, Azula losing something so integral to her identity would push her further into her beliefs. Remember, she's the prodigy. That's the main reason she had Ozai's approval in the first place. It's all she has.

Losing something so integral to her identity would make her double down on her desire for vengeance. She already wants revenge for her loss of the Fire Lord position, which was the goal she had been striving for all her life. Losing her bending, which to her is even more important than the position of the Fire Lord, would validate her belief that the world is against her even further. Consequently fueling her desire for revenge.

In addition, it would be an attempt to fix the problem without addressing it from its cause. And this is the difference between Azula and Ozai. Ozai wants power. Azula wants to be loved. He's a wielder, she's a weapon. Taking Ozai's bending worked because to him it was a tool for power. But the root of Azula's problem is the reason she uses her bending. It will be properly solved when the motive changes, which can only be achieved if she manages to trust somebody enough to let them love her. Which is the hard part, but that's for another time.

[akxmee]

★ 00. 𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗟𝗢𝗚𝗨𝗘.

"...and we are not certain of how long that would take. Please, hide at home and by under any means, do not open your doors to any animal. Thank you for your attention!"

You turned the television off from the sofá you were sitting on. It has been chaos these days, and you were so sure it was a matter of time until the government confined the whole city until they find them.

Them, the hybrids.

Humans with the hability of turning themselves into different kinds of animals.

Humans, if that's even a valid term to refer to them. Dangerous humans that think as animals and don't feel any remorse.

The lack of information the government was giving everyone about them was close to none, and it was making you mad.

God, you were so tired of this.

"Woof!"

The bark interrumped your thoughts. You looked to your left and before even knowing it, you were being assaulted by a huge and ridiculously fluffy dog.

Ah, satoru.

He was your adorable samoyedo, a beautiful and friendly canine breed that was licking your entire face the moment he laid his paws on you.

"Ew 'toru, gross. Get off!"

You tried your best to get your pet off you, reaching your goal after a few struggles. With the end of your sleeve you wiped your face as well as you wrote a mental note of cleaning your face before going to sleep.

Satoru kept wagging his tail, waiting for his rubs that he got not too long after. You pet him for a while until a yawn comes out of your mouth, looking at the hour.

2am.

Damn, that extra shift at work was long.

So yes, maybe going to sleep was the best option at this very moment. You got up and walked through the rooms, stopping at the bathroom to clean the sticky mess satoru made mostly on your cheek. Once your face was clean enough not to feel gross anymore you grabbed the nearest towel and dried your face with it, staring into your reflection's eyes in the mirror.

You had bags under your eyes, messy hair and your skin looked paler than usual; it was painfully obvious that you haven't had a wink of sleep lately.

There were so many reasons why.

For example, the fact that you were getting fewer and fewer clients with the pass of the time since the news of hybrids walking among humans were simply thrown to the audience's face. Some people were scared to go out and you were losing money, not a lot, but still money. Extra hours at the café were spent working just to get a few more clients, and you don't even know how to manage your time right now to get a proper bit of sleep.

But honestly? You could go with It just for your pets' sake.

Because they were the reason why you had your own business right now, and the only ones who listened to you rant about your shitty day at work at the end of the day.

So you shaked your thoughts away and went for satoru, patting the side of your leg as a silent order for him to follow you.

"C'mon, toru. Let's go to sleep, i'm sure suguru is there too."

The dog ran to your side in no time and you two went to your room. It was cozy, simple with a lot of photos pinned on a huge cardboard on the wall.

Some were of you, some of your friends and family. Your gaze landed on a specific photo, one of satoru and suguru dressed in some type of cheap pets costume you bought for a few dollars online. They looked adorable, satoru's fluffy hair looking so messy in the picture and suguru making a funny face that you got just in time. You were so sure they hated that picture, but you loved it.

As you looked over the bed you found out your assumption was right, since the black cat was already drowning in the softness of a pillow on your bed and sleeping. Much to suguru's dismay, satoru jumped on the bed to greet him and woke the poor cat up. They started to fight in a playful way, suguru's tiny paws hitting satoru's nose repeatedly.

You laughed at the scene, finding it kind of silly.

Soon after, you were already in bed with a dog sleeping soundly at your feet and a cat on the canine's tail, using it as some kind of pillow.

The sudden sound of scratching woke you up.

It came from your window, and you ignored it until it was unbearable. You angrily got up and rubbed your eyes while trying to find the light switch in the dark.

The sudden clarity hurt your eyes for a little until you got used to it, looking where the sound came. You thought that it was probably a bird or a branch being dragged by the wind and constantly bumping into your window, but it was not.

Something was there.

Something big.

Why didn't satoru bark? You looked around just to find not only he was gone, but suguru was nowhere to be seen too. It wasn't something new, sometimes it was too hot at bed and the pets went to the cold floor at some random room so you didn't really mind that. But still—

"Woof."

Was the sound coming from behind the window just now? You thought about it and got closer to it. The closer you got, the more you could picture the silhouette of a dog.

Okay, that had more sense.

"Toji?"

You said as soon as you opened the window. It was Toji, the stray dog you fed when he passed by.

He didn't have any owner, no home to go.

But he was fine, he didn't want any.

The times you opened your door for him to get in, he wouldn't. He liked you just because you gave him food, that's all. Sometimes he came with a few stains of blood on his dark fur but he wouldn't let you take care of him.

"You should choose better hours to ask for food, really. I don't think i have something left in the fridge, but let me give it a look."

The dog just barked again and sat down while you were gone looking for something good enough for him to eat.

That's what happened a few minutes ago now. You fed Toji and just like he always does, he left. Now you were going to your kitchen holding the dirty plate you used to feed the stray dog, careful not to wake your pets. You didn't know where they went, but your house isn't that big either so you can hear any loud sound even if you're in the furthest room.

"We need to tell her, Satoru. She will eventually find out, and you know that."

"Suguru, don't mess with me right now. You know what they say about us on TV! She will think we're liars and.."

The voices stopped talking as if they both knew what he was going to say next.

You froze.

You could feel your heart sink and your breath stop. Never in your life has someone broken into your home, and you only had a dirty plate that you were holding with a tight grip.

What was going to happen? Also, were your pets okay? Did they hide? Your mind raced with thoughts and doubts, not only worried by your safety but satoru's and suguru's too.

Wait.

Was it your pets' name you just heard them mention while talking to eachother?

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓. 🌷

—𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧

@kingshitonly @snake-lover-artist-blog @ashers-playpen

[madeby-meru]

I have always seen the argument of "If you don't like it then stop playing" flying around since I have been in gaming communities and I have been thinking on writing a more detailed post on why I personally think that this statement doesn't truly fit in many of the complains about MCL NG.

Just as a heads up, I am not directing this to anyone in specific, honestly I can't even remember who has said this cause I have seen this comment across multiple social medias and various forums. So, to make things clear: I am only discussing the concept behind the argument, that's it.

Leaving it under the cut.

Now,

why do I think this response doesn't apply to (many of) New Gen critiques?

Lets use another free game with microtransactions as an example that I think will make things pretty obvious: the new Nikki game

If I came into that fandom and began complaining about the concept of style battles, of how focused it is on dressup, the storyline being about fashion... That is a me problem, that is my issue alone. I am complaining about the core of the game, about the purpose of it and about what makes the game what it is. I am not the target audience. I should, therefore, simply stop playing cause the game does not align with my taste and I am not gonna enjoy it.

I believe this is not what is happening with New Gen.

The most common critiques I have seen about it are: - The AP system (merging AP and Gold, expensive dialogue choices) - The style contest (unfair competition) - The price of packs (they are not simply cosmetics, they are means of earning more in-game currency, so they create an imbalance in the playerbase between those that can afford them and those that cannot) - The lack of transparency and communication with the company (announcements coming too late, not letting the players know what they will need to spend in events) - The timing of events (the pack event timings, overlapping) - The quality of the writing (inconsistencies, lack of a linear storyline, characters feeling OOC, nonsensical plots)

These complains are not a matter of taste, these complains are a matter of unfair treatment and poor quality (despite the cost of the game).

In this specific case, those of us that complain about these things are the target audience. We have a history of nostalgia, we like the personalization and dressup aspect, we like the adult setting and characters, we like the style of otome, we like the free option to play. And most importantly, I feel like most of us that complain so vehemently want to keep playing. We are still here for a reason, there is still something that keeps us logging in every day. We don't want the bad things to overpower the good ones.

"Don't play the game" feels like a dismissive argument here, it casts aside complains that should be made. You should complain about the poor quality of a product (specially if you have invested money and time in it), you should complain about the poor treatment you are receiving (feeling pushed to make purchases, feeling unlistened, feeling like you are not treated the same as other plaeyers, etc). These types of comments are necessary and beneficial. A critique that is well worded and based helps the game be better, a company should hope to receive those and not simply compliments. A company should what to fix what is wrong.

I think that the negative sentiment many players share its completely understandable and it should not be labelled as simply being hateful for no reason.

Of course I am not including hate for the sake of hate here. That may help vent when you're frustrated (valid) but it does not add anything or help in any way. Obviously, it's very easy to get wrapped up in the negative mindset and not allow yourself to enjoy the parts of the game that you do like and that you can find fun and engaging. It is important to take a step back every now and then and see when you may be being unfair (specially to other players, its unfortunately easy to get heated in a discussion and hurt someone else). And if you feel like the critiques towards the game and company are affecting you in any way, please step away from them. Mute, block, silence, keep your peace in your online experience and cater it to yourself <3

[shadowed-dancer]

Horikoshi recently revealed that Endeavor was supposed to die during the PLF war and that honestly validates something I've been feeling but couldn't quite articulate: "Horikoshi doesn't know who the central Todoroki is" (or he does, but he changed it halfway through to the worse option)

Endeavor dying would have been AMAZING if Shoto were the central character in the Todoroki subplot. The main reason this is so is that Endeavor would be out of the way. Shoto would have full reigns on how he wants to handle Touya (the "final villain" of the Todoroki subplot), and the rest of the family can play a role in this as a supporting cast.

However, Shoto is NOT the central character in the Todoroki subplot. Or, at least, he used to be, but he's not anymore. He's not allowed to have a final fight with Touya because Touya needs to still confront Endeavor. Regardless of how that fight ends, whether it's Shoto saving his brother or knocking him out, Shoto isn't allowed to end the conflict until Touya and Endeavor interact.

At the start of the series, it was really obvious that Shoto was the central figure (and was our pov character) for his family drama. During the sports festival, HE'S the one who shared the backstory. The flashbacks are framed around what HE saw. HE is the one taking a step forward to fix his family, and it starts with reconciling with his mom. At this point, Endeavor is what I'll call "the instigator". He is the cause for the family drama, and though we may not know Touya at this point, Endeavor has already released the future final boss of the subplot into the world.

In the Pro Hero arc, Endeavor becomes his own central figure as a pov character into the world of pros. He then overlaps with the Todoroki subplot by wanting to atone and remove himself from the role of the instigator. The thing is, he can't. What was done cannot be undone, and the most he can do at this point is try to make things better for his family moving forward. At this point, he and Shoto can coexist as central figures because the final boss has not yet been introduced.

The second Touya confirmed his identity, either Endeavor or Shoto had to stop being the central figure. Having Touya need to fight two heroes before being able to come to any end just feels sloppy, and since Shoto was given the first fight, it makes him seem like the less important figure. Even Touya doesn't care! He spends a good chunk of the fight talking about how he'd rather fight Endeavor. This makes Endeavor into the central figure as he is now the one to end the fight. HE'S the one the final boss has been waiting for, not Shoto.

The thing is, this started as Shoto's story, so it would have made sense for it to end as Shoto's story as well. Even if it meant killing Endeavor to force Shoto to be the ONLY central figure (probably to Touya's dismay) it would have allowed Shoto the space he needed to lead the ending he deserved, rather than be pushed to a side character.

TL;DR Endeavor surviving forced Shoto into the role of a supporting character in a plot line that started as SHOTO'S plot line.

[yuri-is-online]

Been brainrotting lately and now I present to you what I think is an underused story beat for Yuu. What if “Yuu” isn’t even the prefect’s real name?

Considering that Yuu’s first experience in Twisted Wonderland is waking up in a coffin, wandering around an obviously foreign place, and being questioned by a suspicious man in a crow mask surrounded by people in black hooded robes… I just think most people would not give their real name in such a sketchy situation.

Fast forward to when Yuu is more comfortable with the cast and there is both comedy and angst potential here. On one hand, the reactions to the deception could be pretty funny. (Cue a “woe is me” from Crowley. Of course he can’t find a way home for you when he doesn’t have your real name!) On the other, this could be a great way of exploring the prefect having a crisis. Yuu already lost so much in being taken to Twisted Wonderland, and now in a way even the prefect’s name has been taken.

What do you think?

waking up in a coffin, wandering around an obviously foreign place, and being questioned by a suspicious man in a crow mask surrounded by people in black hooded robes…

Annon, annon, annon, when you put it like that it sounds like Yuu woke up in the middle of a cult ritual of some sort. Which I suppose if you were an edgy Night Raven student idia you might argue that the enrollment ceremony totally is as an excuse not to go

But to be more serious, I have seen a few memes about this concept and I like it a lot σ(￣、￣=) It's a fun character concept, it's not everyday you get a chance to re-invent yourself completely.

That being said, just based off of the few dialogue options Yuu has at the start, I think Yuu is implied to believe that they are dreaming:

Which honestly doesn't make this idea any less valid. If you're dreaming about waking up in the middle of some weird necromancer's rite, why not give him a fake name? It's not meant to be serious anyway. Just go with the flow and hope things don't get too weird (and get offended when your dream doesn't give you magic powers) until it's too late and you realize everyone thinks your name really is that bad joke you made.

If you want to get darker, maybe Yuu really did think they died. A black carriage pulling a coffin really only goes to a funeral, and death has been depicted as an unmanned coach with black horses. Maybe Yuu is only just coming to grips with the fact that they really are alive when they see Riddle overblot and he hurts them. Maybe they now are sitting next to two people who have started to think about them as a friend, a really close one. Maybe they think Yuu is really brave because they charged headlong into danger without a second thought, and won, twice now. Maybe Yuu cries themselves to sleep that night because in a way... you died so yuu could live.

As for reactions, Crowley and the other staff members I think would be the most dramatic, followed by Adeuce and Grim. Jack I can see accepting your reasons and not thinking too hard about it, maybe even respecting your survival instincts, while Epel... well he says he's mad but mostly he's just concerned. He knows what it feels like to have two dueling parts of yourself and trying to find the middle ground. Ortho would be excited, you have a secret identity just like a magical girl/super sentai/anime idol/superhero take your pick really. He certainly doesn't mind getting to know you all over again.

Sebek screams at you for being a threat to Wakasama but it's clear to everyone who actually knows him that he's really just worried about the amount of stress you put on yourself. He would hate for you to have the same issues with self loathing he does. And Malleus? Well he lied to you about who he was because he was worried you would be afraid, even though you didn't know he existed. It would be very petty for him to hold a grudge against you for doing the same.

In general I think this would be something the others would have an easier time understanding as opposed to Yuu's sense of alienation or loneliness at not having magic. Identity issues are common themes in fiction, so I could see them actually seeing it as a problem as opposed to an abstract problem like no government papers (since these kids with one obvious exception don't do taxes.) But it would make for a great way to explore the prefect having a crisis just as you say, in a way it's the perfect example for every problem they might have with being in Twisted Wonderland.

[chaifootsteps]

sometimes I see fans say the reason Verosika felt like Blitzo was bad in bed was because he didn't really love her. meanwhile Stolas has no complaints on that front because they're more sexually compatible

honestly, I really disagree. when Ozzie's came out my read on Blitzo's behavior was that it was another way of keeping people at a distance. that he didn't meet Verosika's needs that great because he was self sabotaging again and when that didn't work he picked the nuclear option of stealing her credit cards (in other words, the old 'I'll do something I know is sucky then deny it was that bad to make you break up with me because I'm too much of a coward to do it myself' routine - he snaps back at her in e3 but in e7 he looks regretful when she calls him a heartbreaking freak; knowing he really did hurt her hurts him).

He and Verosika were actually dating and going steady together. They had a real relationship but Blitzo just wasn't emotionally ready for things to get serious or to trust anyone who says they love him. Which Verosika very likely did, she got his literal name tattooed on her arm

Meanwhile with Stolas they're not actually dating so Blitzo doesn't have to get as anxious on that front since he thinks all Stolas wants is sex not love or intimacy, not to mention his entire business is riding on him keeping Stolas sexually satisfied. It seems more likely that Blitzo is the one getting less sexually out of his arrangement with Stolas - even in full moon where he's suddenly the most enthusiastic he's ever been on screen he still takes about sex with Stolas like it's a chore he needs to do and do well ('taking a break from having to plow Stolas', 'now I'll have to do this specific position I was keeping in reserve to keep him happy'). Sure, Blitzo maybe enjoys the sex but fundamentally it's just part of his job (and Stolas in season one was written like someone who had a completely voracious sexual appetite who basically just dragged Blitzo along for the ride)

not to mention how Blitzo seems to derive some of his self esteem from being good at sex - with Verosika that slipped because he had other validation from her in that she presumably liked him as a person before he screwed her over and they broke up

of course now we're in season 2 and trying to make Stol!tz happen by any means necessary it's probably only a matter of time before the whole thing gets flattened into 'Blitzo actually enjoyed being forced into sex where his partner used him like a toy and him missing that is a sign he really loves Stolas!' whereas with Verosika he wasn't actually into her, or something like that

This is an excellent analysis and also tough to read, because you just know all of this is something that would have gone without saying in a better show. Also, that the people saying that Stolas's sexual satisfaction = proof that Blitzo loves him are the same ones who were claiming Blitzo looked tired and absolutely miserable in that picture of them together. You know, this one.

As heartbreaking and fucked up as it would have been, I actually wish they would have left in the "Is this because I couldn't cum a couple of times?" line from Blitzo when Stolas starts to take the book back. It would have been so telling, and I'm sure that's exactly why they cut it.

[pebsterino]

Im a fan of Da since 2019, I've cherished all 3 games, my favorite one is DA2. I will not be persuaded by anyone that DA4 is a good DA game.

They have damned everything I loved about Dragon Age for... this???

This is no longer the dark fantasy I fell in love with; it's a game that feels more like a Disney movie, complete with writing intended for children. The way they treat YOU as a player suggests that you aren't capable of solving the easiest riddle in this world. The direction of the writing is baffling. The constant explanations for everything make my blood boil because I'm not a child, and I can think for myself. They claim this is an RPG, yet it lacks any meaningful RPG elements. You have no choice whatsoever; your character is scripted the way the developers wanted them to be. (By the way, I had no idea that no matter which option you choose, your character will always try to be funny in an unfunny way.)

As for the gameplay, I've never cared for the gameplay in any Dragon Age games, so I won’t dwell on it, but I’ll share my opinion nonetheless. I think it’s still an improvement from Inquisition, but that’s not hard to achieve. The game was designed to be played online, which is another insane thing to consider. Is a Dragon Age game supposed to be online??? It’s so ridiculous, and I have no idea how BioWare thought it would work when nobody showed any interest in the multiplayer mode in Inquisition.

The lack of choice and the absence of consequences for your actions are glaring issues. Not a single companion cares if you try to be "rude" to them because you simply can’t be. The fact that you cannot make any of your companions leave your party is ridiculous. You are forced to harden one of your companions (which happens in almost every title), and the only consequences of them being hardened are that they will refuse to heal you and their approval rating is slightly lowered. You can literally romance both of them as if nothing happened.

I'm tired of my companions constantly reminding me that they have issues and need to work through their trauma with my character. As someone who goes to therapy every week, I find this portrayal insulting and ridiculous. Therapy is neither fun nor pleasant. It isn’t something you resolve by completing two quests and reassuring a character that “it’s fine, we have each other, and I care about you; your feelings are valid.” It’s the most absurd echo chamber I’ve ever been in. The fact that none of my companions can stop making everything about themselves and get their shit together while a blight is swallowing the world is beyond me. Therapy takes months, even years, and it’s a deeply personal journey that friends cannot, and shouldn't, interfere with. The whole idea that my protagonist can choose what’s best for the companions is equally absurd. My companions should be making choices based on how I treated them throughout the game; it shouldn't be up to me to decide that. And the best part is that, in the end, it doesn't matter, because no choice in this game has any real weight. Honestly, it’s narcissistic of anyone to expect others to fix their mental health issues. This was a reality check for me when I was younger; it hurts, but it is what it is.

The writing of the characters is something I never thought possible, but here we are. Most characters are written as if they're afraid to offend anyone. My wise friend once said, "If you live your life trying to avoid offending everyone, you might as well not live at all," and that’s true. It’s probably another reason why I can’t take anything seriously in this game—because nothing is serious. Nobody talks like this ever. So much of this is self-indulgent writing, which is fine and valid if you do it for yourself, not for the masses who will play this game.

This is easily illustrated by the Commander of the Grey Wardens, who tries so hard to be the bad guy. He won’t listen to logic or reason; he’s just a children’s movie villain who is evil for the sake of being evil. Honestly, the dialogue speaks for itself.

[worms-in-my-brain]

Being an ally to autistic people is more than understanding that we might not always get social cues.

It’s also respecting our perspectives as valuable and accurate.

If every time you hear about a conflict involving an autistic person your train of thought goes something like, “I’m sure they didn’t mean it like that but I’m sorry they did that!” and not, “I should probably hear their perspective before I assume that the person I’m talking to is giving me a perfectly accurate depiction of events,” then there is something wrong!!

I’m saying this because this or things like this have happened to me with MULTIPLE different friend groups and the result is never good. I always feel like I’m not respected, like they don’t value me or my emotions, I feel infantilised and like my autonomy has been disrespected. And on top of that, my friends end up assuming things about me that aren’t true! Maybe I said what I said not because I was “confused and didn’t understand” but rather because the other person was being an ass?? That option is NEVER considered when you’re autistic. And then because they assume that they also assume I’m going to react to certain things in ways I straight up won’t. Like they’ll assume I’ll get really mad when I never have in that situation before just because they think I don’t understand a situation and they think I’m categorically in the wrong and need to be “corrected” or “let down easy” or something when, in reality, what I really needed was to have a talk with my friends and actually communicate so that the misunderstanding could be cleared up.

And this applies even when autism IS the reason I understood something differently (it’s not always just didn’t understand—it can also be understood differently), that doesn’t make my autistic perspective any less valuable or real. If somebody said “meet me at 5” and meant “meet me at 5:15-30” and I got annoyed because I had to wait for them 20 mins even though I can’t stand for that long, my perspective is still a valid one. It’s not, “oh well Cyril is autistic so of course you have to talk to them like a child or else they’ll throw a fit,” it’s, “Cyril is autistic but their perspective is not a child’s perspective, it’s an autistic perspective, so they don’t deserve to be treated as a child, they deserve clear communication with appreciation of their autism and also treatment and respect as an autonomous adult with their own emotions.”

Honestly the people who treat me best are the people who see me primarily as a person and not an autistic person. Like yes you do have to keep in mind that I am autistic, but you can’t be reading every single one of my actions through the lens of autism, or you’re never going to see me as another person who you can, in fact, understand and relate to, even though you are not yourself autistic! I’m not an alien. If I can understand you, albeit not perfectly, then you can, to some extent, understand me.

[the-lincyclopedia]

In Defense of Juliet

I just read Romeo and Juliet with @socialshakespeare, and I felt like I understood it for the first time, since it’s a play I’ve never studied, and I’ve mostly been exposed to it by seeing it performed a couple times. And I am so angry on Juliet’s behalf. She has been done so dirty, both by the adults around her within the world of the play, and also by the way she’s been remembered in pop culture. She’s not a foolish, simpering teenager the way she’s often thought of as being. I honestly think that Juliet is the most reasonable and pragmatic character in the play, and that there aren’t any major decisions she makes where she truly had a better option. 

Romeo and Juliet, the characters, are both often mocked for how quickly they fall for each other. And I do think there’s something to that when it comes to Romeo, especially given that he was professing love for Rosaline literally hours before meeting and apparently falling for Juliet. But Juliet? What people often forget is that, right before she meets Romeo, Juliet is informed by her father that he has arranged a marriage for her, and that she has to marry Paris whether she likes it or not. 

Now, a few notes on this: 

Juliet is 13 years old. There are plays and books where you have to kind of guess at characters’ ages or figure it out from context clues, but this is very much not one of those times. Juliet being 13 gets talked about, explicitly, a lot in this play. 

It was not normal for girls to get married that young, even in Shakespeare’s day. Here’s a great essay on that. 

Paris is definitely older than Juliet. It’s unclear by how much, but it could be over a decade, maybe by a substantial amount. He’s also canonically pretty skeezy. 

Even in many cultures where arranged marriages are common, it’s also common for the consent of the couple to matter. “Arranged marriage” does not by necessity equal “coerced marriage,” and indeed, the Church in Shakespeare’s day did (at least in terms of doctrine) require the people being married to consent in order for their marriage to be valid. (See the essay linked to in point 2.)

So here Juliet is, knowing she’s going to be forced into a marriage she doesn’t want. Her options are basically to go along with marrying Paris, or to do something that her parents can’t undo that will make the marriage to Paris impossible. What are her options for that? Well: 

She can become a nun. This isn’t her first choice, and she’s not too keen on it even later in the play, when her options are much more limited and Friar Lawrence suggests it. 

She can run away but not become a nun. This would basically mean she would be destitute and incredibly vulnerable. It’s not surprising she doesn’t choose this option. 

She can kill herself. Again, unsurprising that this isn’t her first choice. 

She can quickly and secretly marry someone who isn’t Paris and present the marriage to her parents as a fait accompli. 

It’s really, really not surprising to me that her first choice is option (4). I mean, personally I would have considered becoming a nun, but I’m ace, and Juliet seems to, uh, probably not be. So, okay, you’ve got Juliet, literally fresh off a conversation with her father about how he’s going to force her into an unwanted arranged marriage, and she’s trying to figure out how to get out of it, and then this guy approaches her at a party and seems totally into her. Like, are she and Romeo hasty and probably hormonal to think they’re in love this fast? Yeah, probably. And Romeo a) was professing love for someone else this morning, and b) does not seem to be under urgent familial pressure to marry. But Juliet is desperate to marry someone who isn’t Paris, as soon as humanly possible, and Romeo seems both interested and more tolerable than Paris. Is it surprising that she’s all in? 

So then Romeo and Juliet have the balcony conversation, and then the next day they get married in secret at Friar Lawrence’s. Cool. Now they can break the news to their respective families, Juliet won’t have to marry Paris, and everything will be fine. Right? 

Except then Juliet’s cousin Tybalt picks a fight with Romeo’s friend Mercutio and winds up killing him, so Romeo retaliates by killing Tybalt. Romeo, by law, should be facing capital punishment, but the Prince commutes his sentence to banishment. Which is still a problem for Romeo and Juliet since they’re newlyweds and the Friar and the Nurse are the only ones who know. After spending the night with Juliet in secret, Romeo leaves town because he doesn’t really have a better choice. 

Meanwhile, Tybalt’s death has significantly increased the urgency of Juliet getting married (which her parents don’t know she’s already done). Tybalt and Juliet are the only two in their generation of the Capulets, so Tybalt was The Heir, which means that now that he’s dead, Juliet needs to marry immediately, because, as a girl, she can’t inherit. Ideally, she needs to start producing heirs as soon as possible. Her father suddenly moves the date of her wedding from some inexact time in the future to this Thursday. 

So Juliet’s close cousin has just died, her husband has been exiled, and her second (and, by the standards of the time, inherently sinful) marriage is suddenly very, very soon. She tries to talk her parents out of forcing her to marry Paris, and her dad is still very much not having it. She is, understandably, desperate. She goes to the Friar’s place and starts talking about suicide. 

The Friar tells her not to kill herself, and he gives her a potion that will make her seem dead for a couple days. He tells her to take it before she’s supposed to marry Paris, and then instead of getting married, she’ll be buried, and then she can wake up and get smuggled off to join Romeo in exile. Juliet goes home and takes the potion as instructed. 

But unlike Much Ado about Nothing, this is not a comedy. The potion works; Juliet’s family finds her “dead” and holds her funeral, and Friar Lawrence sends a letter to Romeo informing him of the plan. But the letter doesn’t make it--the friar carrying the message is quarantined for fear of plague--and meanwhile Romeo hears that Juliet has died. He comes back to Verona, duels Paris at Juliet’s tomb, finds Juliet seemingly dead, and kills himself. Juliet wakes up, finds Romeo dead, and (despite the deeply inadequate arguments of the Friar, who leaves Juliet by herself when he hears someone coming) kills herself. 

And like, what the fuck else was she supposed to do? At any point? I thought of the musical Six a lot during today’s read-through, and Anne Boleyn’s line “Like, what was I meant to do?” feels so appropriate for Juliet (as does "All You Wanna Do," for other reasons). She couldn’t just keep living with her parents and being a teenager--she was going to be forced into an unwanted arranged marriage unless she could find a way to make herself permanently unavailable for marriage to Paris. Marrying Romeo seemed like a better idea than becoming a nun, running away and becoming destitute, or dying. Taking the potion of living death and then joining Romeo in exile seemed like a better idea than entering a sinful second marriage. Maybe becoming a nun would have been better than suicide, in the end after Romeo has died, but Juliet has been through an incredibly stressful few days at this point, her cousin is dead, her parents clearly don’t care about her happiness or well-being, and, oh yeah, she just woke up with her dead husband in her lap--I think she’s allowed to be Done at that point. 

I’m not sure that Romeo and Juliet make a good couple with long-term potential or whatever. But this is absolutely not a story about how teenagers are dumb and impulsive. The adults are the ones making terrible decisions--the Montagues and the Capulets for having a deadly feud, the Prince for not doing more to end the feud earlier, the Capulet parents (especially Lord Capulet) for trying to force Juliet into an unwanted marriage at a very young age, Juliet’s Nurse for encouraging Juliet to marry Paris even though she knows Juliet is already married to Romeo, Paris for continuing to try to marry Juliet when she’s clearly unhappy about it, Friar Lawrence for leaving the tomb before Romeo arrives and then leaving again when Juliet wakes up and is freaking out--literally all of the adults suck, and Juliet is trying her best in the face of some seriously awful circumstances. 

If the throughline of tragedies is that they couldn’t have gone any other way, I think that’s especially true for Juliet, specifically. She’s so smart, and she’s trying so hard, and there is no way out.

[genderkoolaid]

It's honestly really validating to read your thoughts on butch identity. I kept myself from fully accepting I might be a gay trans man for a long time because being a butch woman was so integral to my identity (I wept after finishing Stone Butch Blues. It was like being seen for the first time) and I hated that it felt like there was no way I could be both. So I was sort of performing trans man comphet and trying to convince myself I liked women just so I wouldn't lose that word. There's so much gender nuance to being butch that I feel like gets lost when we only focus on the sexuality aspect of it.

"There's so much gender nuance to being butch that I feel like gets lost when we only focus on the sexuality aspect of it." Yes!!!!!!

I came out very young (elementary school) as a lesbian, and cut my long hair to a pixie in the same year. And then shortly after began realizing was I was trans as well. I spent essentially my entire life being visibly queer and visibly queer-masculine a lot of the time. And this affected so much, because I latched onto "butch" extremely young and that became my model for my gender. I never shaved largely because, due to reading about butches, I felt that it was part of my path, even though I also knew it distanced me from others. My sense of masculinity and masculine fashion has always been deeply butch, regardless of my gender. Its such a deep and integral part of me and has been my whole life. I truly feel that I can't not be butch. I don't relate to a lot of "female socialization" both due to being autistic and being visibly queer; I always knew that, while being categorized as "girl," I was also never going to be a "real girl," and everyone knew that. Becoming a butch adult felt more natural than puberty.

Which is why its so annoying that people center butchness on sexuality, and specifically romantic-sexual attraction to femmes!!!! Because while I have, in fact, dated femmes (arguably I dated too many cis femme women who I felt I had to walk on ice around to avoid scaring them with my butch gender), like I said, my butchness is a natural part of me. Being queer is a part of being butch, but the way we talk about butchness makes me feel like people can only view it existing in relation to romance (and femmes). And obviously because of radfeminism, trans men & mascs' unique relationships with butchness have been largely ignored in any way besides "I used to be butch, but now I'm a Normal Straight Man!" & also the general erasure of transmasculinity in lesbian history. Lesbian spaces have always been a haven for trans people, because for a long time in the West, your options were generally "move to a new town and go completely stealth for as long as possible" or "find your local lesbians and be a dyke within a community." There's a reason "butch" has always held so much gender nuance. Radclyffe Hall, who wrote the famous lesbian book The Well of Loneliness, has been argued to have been transmasculine- but the idea that butches may truly call into question the gender binary causes too much anxiety, so we have to constantly re-affirm that butches are above all else women. I'm a firm believer that butch4butch relationships have long been a way for gay trans men to indulge their desire for men within the context of lesbian identity (because all the trans guys are fucking each other and always have been).

Anyways. yeah. let butches exist beyond our sexuality. Understand that "butch" carries so much color and cannot be reduced down to a simple binary concept.

(Also anon, if you haven't, you should read this article about transmasculine comphet wrt gayness).

[badaziraphaletakes]

Submitting this... it's a long one, sorry 🥲

*Shakes out very, very long scroll*

*In Bildad voice* "Shall I summarize?"

✅ Demanding that an ab*se victim have a plan for how to fix their ab*ser's Evil Scheme

✅ Saying you would handle the situation better than they did

✅ Acting like outsmarting an ab*ser would have been as simple as writing a sneaky lil note on a sneaky lil piece of paper, like I'm sorry but holy sh*t y'all that is just the most patronizing, trauma-invalidating BS I've ever heard

✅ Saying "idiotic"

✅ Using it to describe an Autistic-presenting character

✅ Who is also an ab*se victim

✅ Calling an ab*se victim "egocentric"

✅ Which is even more problematic given that that ab*se victim is also feminine

✅ Assuming Aziraphale actually wanted Crowley to come back with him, when we aren't yet in full possession of the facts

✅ Assuming Aziraphale meant literally anything he said in the entire Final Fifteen

✅ Assuming that, if Aziraphale really did actually want Crowley to come back with him, he didn't have a valid reason for it (maybe he actually thought it was the safest possible option for Crowley! We don't know!)

✅ Obliquely blaming Aziraphale for maybe being scared to go back alone? Or just not wanting to be lonely when he knows he might very well die up there?

✅ In short, eviscerating an ab*se survivor for having the audacity to respond to the horrendous situation their viewer has trapped them in, in anything short of an entirely morally irreproachable manner, and acting like their (supposed) moral failings gives us license to pronounce judgment on their situation

✅ Accusing Aziraphale of thinking he's always right and Crowley is always wrong, when we know Aziraphale says all that stuff like "You, I am sorry to say, are evil" in the knowledge that heaven and hell might be listening in at any moment

✅ Calling the things Aziraphale said under the ever-watchful eye of his ab*sers "starting a fight"

✅ Ignoring that, if Aziraphale is to blame for "starting a fight" , then just maybe Crowley might share some of the blame. (For the record, we don't think either of them are to blame here, considering Metatrash deliberately trapped both of them in a pressure cooker and turned up the flame, while simultaneously trying to manipulate each of them into thinking the situation was their husband's fault. A strategy which, incidentally, to have worked on a good portion of the fandom... << But we digress. :p )

✅ Saying Aziraphale "meant" the things he said while those ab*sers were possibly listening to him, and had literally just made an extremely explicit death threat

✅ Implying Crowley "doesn't have any spirit left"

✅ Accusing Aziraphale, rather than his and Crowley's ab*sers, of bearing the real responsibility for Crowley's distress

✅ Ignoring that Aziraphale was every bit as distraught as Crowley

✅ Saying Aziraphale "refuses to listen" because he cut Crowley off, even though he was stressed at the time and that's something all of us, especially the neurodivergent folk, do when we're stressed (AND even though he also probably stopped Crowley from saying something that would might have gotten them both roasted on a spit in the flaming cesspits of Abbadon)

✅ Saying that an ab*se victim has been "ignoring" their problem and needs to

✅ "confront"

✅ the "consequences" of

✅ "their" actions

✅ Acting like Aziraphale hasn't already (like any other ab*se victim/survivor) suffered more than enough for a million lifetimes

Did I miss anything lol?

(And okay, yes, the OP is responding to the "Aziraphale has a perfect plan to fix everything" take, which is an arguably slightly-problematic take in itself - but honestly, given that they responded to it by piling on a bunch of crap that was a thousand times more problematic, I'm not feeling disposed to make allowances.)

[steveharrington]

can you elaborate on how fanon nancy is different from canon nancy?

yes <3 when i made that post i was mostly referring to how often i see people seeming to write nancy as like the voice of reason within the group or even the one who provides comfort and stability to others and i just personally don’t think that fits her at all. i think that dilutes what makes nancy so interesting, honestly!! 1. she is not very reasonable and 2. she has trouble expressing herself in a way that other people understand.

1. nancy’s defining character trait imo is her passion. in seasons 1 and 2 she literally v physically cannot accept just allowing barb’s death to be uninvestigated and subsequently covered up, even when steve tries to reason that going along with the cover up is the safest option that ensures no one gets hurt. nancy still can’t allow that to happen and moves forward with her plan to bring barb’s death to light despite it being dangerous and potentially hopeless because she’s acting on her instincts and her love for barb, not on the safest option. in season 3, again, jonathan tries to reason with her and persuade her not to investigate the rats any further for fear of losing their jobs, but in nancy’s mind it’s worth the risk. now im not saying nancy is dumb, because shes canonically extremely smart and even when she does take risks, they’re calculated and planned. but it kinda grinds my gears when people depict her as this levelheaded by-the-books kind of person when she has demonstrated multiple times that she will simply do whatever the fuck she wants, if she feels it’s justified

2. this one moreso, i feel like nancy has fallen victim to that trend of having characters talk like they’re 10 years into therapy. i see this a lot in ship-related content for her, whether it’s jancy or ronance or stoncy, etc. people will often have her make these declarations of love very outright and talk through whatever issues she’s having with someone, which is so….. she doesn’t do that 😭 she historically struggles to bridge the gap between someone else’s position and her own, and it clearly frustrates her. case in point, she isn’t honest with steve until she’s drunk! then afterwards she still struggles to communicate, to the point that in the alleyway scene steve just fully walks away after she fails to respond at all to his questions. with jonathan she’s the same way—their big car argument is clearly frustrating to her and ends with her simply saying “you don’t know what it’s like” after jonathan gives a multi-point argument explaining his point of view. even at the very end of s4, the most recent scene we have of her, there’s so much that isn’t being said between her and jonathan. they’re not being forthcoming with each other. even with robin, she can’t express why robin’s presence is clearly bothering her in s4, even after robin openly gives her the chance to be honest and says “please tell me if im coming off badly”. there’s an enduring lack of communication in nancy’s relationships, and that makes total sense because she doesn’t have a good example of a healthy relationship in her own home. her parents just leave the dinner table when they’re upset with each other. so it blows my mind seeing depictions of her where she’s like “guys our feelings are all valid <3” like she would nottttt say that omg. she may Think it, and Want to express it, but i think it’s a disservice to what makes nancy interesting to just skip 5 years in her emotional development and suddenly have her acting as this mother-figure of the group who addresses everyone’s feelings concisely and plays it safe.

i think it’s a liiiittle bit stemming from misogyny. the “mom friend” trope is kinda pushed on her automatically, even amidst mom steve jokes, because she’s a girl in the group so she MUST attend to everyone’s feelings and make sure all the kids have snacks or whatever. it just does not reflect the more interesting and unique character we see on screen