#i/dd

[aacalienz]

Adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities are ADULTS. Not eternal children

[sillylandmagic]

Everyone is all about supporting autistic folks until they do things that are ‘gross’ or unhygienic.

For example, I spit when I talk because It’s hard to control my saliva. I also am prone to drooling.

I couldn’t dry myself off effectively until I was over 13 years old. I don’t wash my body frequently other than my privates sometimes because of deficits in motor skills and just the inability to effectively do it each time.

I can only slightly scrub my hair with shampoo but it’s dirty after a day because i can’t wash it efficiently. I go days without washing my hair.

I can’t shave or trim any body hair, I can’t remember to use deodorant. I don’t brush my teeth for over a week because no one tells me to and I can’t reliably do it without support.

I’ve never been able to wipe enough after using the bathroom usually leading to wet spots in my underwear. I’ve had UTIs because I can’t realize that my bladder is full. It’s slightly better now but I remember a year ago I held everything in so long that I dribbled some in my underwear because I didn’t go to the bathroom until last second. This happened frequently at home and school. And I would be too embarrassed and didn’t change.

It’s not gross or nasty that certain autistics need substantial support for things like hygiene, toileting, and grooming. Or don’t have support and are left dirty because they can’t do it themselves. You’re not any less human or a person for dealing with these things. I love you/platonic 🫂

[beatingtheouijaboardallegations]

i love you nonspeakers. i love you nonverbal people.

i love you nonverbal people who prefer to be called nonverbal. i love you nonspeaking people who prefer to be called nonspeaking. i love you nonspeaking nonverbal people who tired of debate about terminology or can’t keep up with it and just want be heard and communication rights respected.

i love you people who not speak ever since birth ( hi! ). i love you people who use to speak but experience regression / catatonia / burnout or with degenerative physical disabilities. i love you nonspeaking nonverbal people with acquired disabilities.

i love you multimodal communicators. i love you people with complex communication needs. i love you apraxic people who are unreliably speaking. i love you minimally verbal people. i love you semiverbal people. i love you speaking people with selective mutism with intermittent speech ( who listen to us and not speak over )

I love you nonspeaking nonverbal autistic people. i love you nonspeaking / nonverbal people with other intellectual & developmental disabilities. i love you nonspeaking / nonverbal people with apraxia / dyspraxia ( full body or apraxia of speech ) . I love you nonspeaking nonverbal people with brain injury with stroke with aphasia with genetic disorders. i love you nonspeaking / nonverbal people with mental health disabilities that affect language ( eg schizophrenia ) .

I love you AAC users. I love you users of text based AAC. I love you users of picture based AAC. I love you users of low tech AAC. I love you people who can’t afford the big expensive robust systems and rely on free apps or low tech for that reason. I love you people who need small grid size. I love you people who need visual accommodations to AAC like high contrast. I love you people who need alternate access like switch , eye gaze , head track , joystick , partner assisted scanning to make AAC accessible. I love you nonspeaking / nonverbal people who use sign languages. I love you picture card users. I love you letter board users. I love you people who need human support to use AAC , people who use methods like FC and RPM and S2C and all the “ discredited ” method that are constant at risk of being take away from you.

I love you nonspeaking nonverbal people who haven’t found a way to communicate with words that works for them yet. i love you people who communicate mostly or entirely with behavior with gesture with pointing with vocal sounds not words. i love you people who only way communicate is what the system calls “challenging behavior.” I love you people who communicate through violent meltdown, who SIB and hurt others , run away unsafely , destroy property etc and who are punish institutionalize incarcerate or other abused oppressed instead of helped find other way to communicate. i love you nonverbal nonspeaking people who won’t ever see this post, who under institution control or informal more subtle control and don’t have access to social media , or who disability make social media hard , or who just don't like / have interest in being on here (was me for a while !)

I love you nonverbal and nonspeaking people who have found a home in the nonverbal / high support need community on here and who feel like experience is represent. i love you nonverbal and nonspeaking people who have found a home in offline AAC / nonspeaking world like CommunicationFirst and the spellling to communicate conferences. I love you nonverbal and nonspeaking people who not find their " home " in the disability / nonverbal nonspeaking community yet , who not see own experience represent anywhere.

i love you nonspeakers of color. i love you nonspeaking nonverbal queer and trans people. i love you physically disabled nonspeaking / nonverbal people. i love you mentally ill / Mad nonspeaking nonverbal people. i love you poor nonspeaking nonverbal people. i love you nonspeaking / nonverbal people not from global north.

i love you nonverbal people. i love you nonspeaking people. we are great and we deserve to be heard.

[hiiragi7]

I can't relate to the way people talk about autism online nowadays, and it feels incredibly isolating.

For example, I am glad that people nowadays can be open and celebrate their special interests, but I never had that and feel disconnected due to it. My special interests meant I was socially isolated growing up and trained through ABA not to speak about them unless asked, and to limit myself even then.

Same with stimming, growing up I always had very large stims and it was punished out of me, and now I have a skin picking disorder and don't know how to reconnect with stimming at all. I'm glad for people who can stim without worrying, but at the same time I don't share the experience and feel a bit odd about it.

The way people talk about autism in general nowadays also just doesn't line up with how I have experienced it, which is okay, I just don't relate to the community because of it. Autism for me meant developmental delays, needing help with basic self-care a lot longer than my peers, various speech disorders, facing discrimination from a very young age for being visibly autistic, growing up in SPED and ABA, not having my IEP followed and having no power to do anything about it, my parents fearing I'd regress in my skills and talking about sending me to a special needs home, learning disability and being unable to keep up with my peers in school, processing issues and being constantly overwhelmed by stimuli, needing to have noise cancelling headphones to manage being in public, having to switch schools because they couldn't support an autistic child, elopement, specialized schedules, autism therapies, and... a lot of shit that just doesn't get talked about in the online autism community, basically.

Which, I feel a lot of that is because most people in the online community are diagnosed late and "level 1"/"high-functioning"/"low supports needs"/whichever term you prefer, which is fine, but I also wish I knew of spaces for autistics which don't have that experience - I'm sure they exist, but I don't know of any and don't know where to look.

There's no point to this post, really, I'm just like... rambling, and maybe even hopeful that someone who reads this can point me in the right direction with where to find experiences like mine, and community. Others like me I can talk to. More space for people with medium and high supports needs. Stuff like that.

[kittentism]

love msn / hsn spaces , love i/dd spaces , love nonverbal / nonspeaking spaces , love tbi spaces . these spaces help kitty understand self , help kitty be kinder to self , help kitty advocate for self .

know not perfect person to be in spaces , know not understand things well and know will say wrong thing but still love spaces even if scary to me . still love spaces that help kitty realize not exaggerating , not being paranoid , not struggle because personal failure . spaces that help kitty find voice to say have issue and need help and need acknowledgement despite years and years of told just " attention seeking "

[pixierainbows]

some times autism is too loud too frustrating too awful too terrible to live with. Pixie have very very difficult today .

have to keep cleaning to stop from hurts the Pixie, but not did help enough . now Pixies head really hurting , and feel like throwing up . Pixie try. try so much it make head just hurt more .

this, and also the can not make food to eat, and other things , make need caregivers . all the time .

but can not get because not enough caregivers for everybody what need. and . nobody willing to work with *Pixie* specifically , Pixies needs are too much for everybody ... ? the last one made Pixie cry so much .

Pixie can not fix this, just have to keep trying Pixies best . so . guardian Wizard can go work and . not worry about the Pixie , being at home alone .

[pulsar-ray]

shoutout to Everyone who cannot Read books. i cannot read books.. Have not willingly since i was 12, it was warriors. Cannot read 'adult' books because my cognition is ASS!!!.. so be it then!!!! i need not to read to be worthy . Get over it

[rurustims]

people don't understand education in any form for someone like me is too hard im in specialised sessions right now but it sucks im not progressing staff aren't the best and im just so fatigued and overwhelmed

i need to do a few hours every day ideally but this week was the first ever i have actually went in every day to do a session i keep staying home because i cant do it but im luckily seeing my SENDCO worker today so im happy with that i see her for about 1hr+ ish

[boughkeeper-dainsleif]

do any intellectually disabled people have advice for someone who is suspecting they may have intellectual disability? i am not going to self diagnose it as i have been told by people with ID that it is not a self diagnosable condition, so i'm looking instead to be formally evaluated by a professional. but i have some questions for people with ID first.

what is the diagnostic process like, and what should i expect? which professional (therapist, psychiatrist, or pediatrician) should i bring it up with first? are there things i should think about in regards to myself before pursuing an evaluation? will my existing diagnosis of level 2 autism make the diagnostic process different/harder? if you have other advice or information please share. i'm confused right now and don't know what my next steps might look like.

[zebulontheplanet]

Dating as semi-verbal

I’ve had multiple partners. All of which have known I’m autistic, and have known that I do struggle with speech, however most just marked it off as me being “quiet” or when I fumble over my words as “cute” and “quirky”

It wasn’t until my current relationship that I started being very open about my communication needs, and how quite frankly I don’t talk a lot and even struggle with it. My partner is very understanding. While I’m going through regression with speech, has been supportive and even encouraging of me using an AAC device. Me and my partner are long distance right now, so we’re able to plan the days we call which gives me time to gather energy to talk more. However recently, with my regression + new medication, I’m a lot less verbal and speak in shorter sentences. At first I was frustrated. I just wanted to talk to my boyfriend the 1-2 days a week we do. He didn’t mind though, even if I spoke in just yes or no’s, or echolalia, he didn’t seem to mind. Wether that be because he just didn’t notice, or because he was being supportive I will never know.

It takes time to gain courage to talk to partners about your struggles, and it takes a long time to find the right person in the first place. Give it time and you’ll find that person.

[ira-407]

My Definition of "Manchild"

Manchild is an age old name people have on the internet for people they don’t like. It’s been used pretty broadly but generally speaking it means one or more of the following

An adult (usually male) who…

Still collects action figures

Watches cartoons

Likes things made for kids or all ages

Is passionate about sci-fi and superheroes

Has an air of “child-like” innocence to them

Still lives with their parents

Is unemployed

Has poor hygiene

Is possibly incontinent

Regularly visit amusement parks like Disney by themselves

Likely has an intellectual and/or developmental disability

Incessantly whines about unimportant stuff

Not all of these things are inherently bad. In fact, most of them aren’t. There’s certainly a stigma surrounding adults who indulge in escapist material. Many adults who do this are likely to have an intellectual or developmental disability. This is especially obvious when you regularly attend fan conventions. I’m not even saying that to be funny, it’s literally true. I in many ways fit the description of a “manchild”. If someone called me that for those reasons alone, it would be patronizing and infantilizing.

Many teens and adults, this especially goes for people with intellectual disabilities, are viewed as “having the body of a teen/adult but the mind of a child”. The reasoning used for this is a combination of what their interests are, what their general disposition is, how much support they require from others to live, and how they dress, among other things. None of these are things that actually make someone a manchild. None of these things are exclusively characteristic of children. None of it justifies talking to someone like they are a child if they are not one nor does it excuse putting them in classes that are basically kindergarten for older kids/adults. Nothing justifies these things.

The last point on the above list is something that I think actually does make someone a manchild. While many people on the internet who complain about, say, their favorite sci-fi franchises “going woke”, check off the other boxes as well, those things are most certainly not one in the same. But there are also adults who act this way and are not into geek or internet subculture. Btw, a gender neutral term for this I think could be appropriate is Whiny Little Shit. Crybaby, perhaps. Or even just whiny.

Children aren’t even like this, funnily enough. Sure they get upset over small things very often, but a lot of the time it can either be due to disregulation, not yet having better control of their emotions, or a combination of the two. Manchildren *do* know better, yet still get upset over petty BS. And it’s funny.

So here are a few examples of things manchildren/Whiny Little Shits often complain about

Losing an election

Being rejected by women or someone they perceive as female. Or anyone they make inappropriate advancements towards.

Being rightfully criticized for their actions

Getting deplatformed for spewing dangerous ideas

Being kicked out of a venue for public indecency

A prominent character existing in the newest iteration of a long running series they like being female, nonbinary, canonically disabled and/or a person of color. Bonus points if they call it “woke”.

Having it so hard despite being a billionaire

Being told “no” in general

So manchildren exist, or any other variation of the term. They are not worth your time if you come across them. But just because they fit some of the criteria listed above doesn’t automatically mean they are an unpleasant brat. So whenever I happen to call someone a manchild-it’s really the incessant complaining that I am referring to.

Short version: There is a common term on the internet for people known as “manchild”. It tends to be applied to someone simply for being an adult that likes certain things or lives a particular lifestyle. Those things alone are not do not make someone a manchild. This term can be especially harmful to adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities. What actually makes someone a manchild is who they are as a person.

[aacalienz]

if you’re autistic (even if you’re white, able to mask and fully speaking) you’re much closer to people with intellectual and developmental disabilities than you ever will be to neurotypical society. Include people with I/DD in your activism. Don’t separate yourself from us. I’d go as far as to say all autistic people have a developmental disability. You don’t have to identify that way, but really think hard about why you’re choosing not to. Autism is a Developmental Disability and and by separating yourself from intellectual and developmental disabilities (I/DD) you are throwing autistics with higher support needs and autitistics with intellectual disabilities under the bus. (Signed developmentally disabled autistics without ID who are considered developmentally disabled by the state)

[sillylandmagic]

Decided to make a more thorough post of how my autism and other co-occurring conditions affect me. Took a bit so I hope you like it.

[malazansapper]

Who else goes to day support programs?

[consumebread]

[pulsar-ray]

happy Pride month ! ! here is your reminder that intensely / severely / big / whatever word wanna use Mentally Disabled people CAN use whatever label/exoression they want because they have the same autonomy as You !

yes this includes Kink

includes Gender

includes HRT

includes Sexuality

includes Romance

includes Neo/Xeno labels

includes those who Can't understand gender sexuality etc because STILL have autonomy to do whatever want

includes EVERYTHING & EVERYONE

!