#honestly ​i can see myself running up and down the building to do shit like this

[hiddenworldofmary]

my neighbour is singing abba again and it brings me so much joy that i’m considering trying to hunt him down to tell him he’s cool if i hear it again because third time’s the charm

[mywritersmind]

WINNING KISS - LN4

summary : lando isn’t used to being a human mirror, but when a pretty girls tells him to hunch down and let her fix her lipstick in the reflection of his glasses, he’s more than happy to oblige.

listen up : no warnings!!

word count : 750

⋆｡‧˚⋆

I can practically feel the music through my veins. The lights of the club are flashing and my friends are laughing and swinging shots back.

I won today. Singapore has been fucking amazing honestly. Besides the whole drowning in sweat thing.

“So…” Max Fewtrell claps a hand on my shoulder, “Taking a girl home tonight, winner?” He teases me as I roll my eyes and sip my drink, “What- You too tired?” he fakes a frown. I didn’t really want to go out tonight but decided it’s sort of a one in a lifetime thing.

“Go find your girlfriend, idiot.” I eye him.

He throws up his arms and laughs, “Gladly!” As he walks away I feel a hand on my shoulder, spinning me around. I’m surprised who did it had such force for being so small.

A girl stands in front of me, a pencil in hand and for a second I think she’s going to ask for an autograph, “Bend down a bit!” She tugs on my shirt and I do as I'm told because I'm genuinely so confused and the pretty girl means business.

She takes the sunglasses from my head and pushes them over my eyes, looking directly into them and bringing the pencil to her lips.

The ‘pencil’, I now realize, it’s a makeup product and deposits a dark color to her lips as she uses me as her mirror.

As she’s stood in front of me, my eyes can’t help but analyze her. This club is stuffy and smoky but she’s so close I can see everything she has on.

She’s got messy brown hair, silver jewelry, a mini skirt, a fur jacket, and a white corset top. Something about her feels magnetic. She’s stunning.

My eyes go to her lips which she smacks together before pulling out a proper lipstick, as she runs the makeup over her lips I start to smile a bit. She finishes quickly and doesn’t pauses as she starts to place the makeup back in her back.

I slide the glasses down to hang around my neck, I see the recognition appear on her face, “Shit.” She says confidently, “You’re that guy!”

I laugh a bit, standing up straighter and looking down at her, “Nice to meet you too.”

“Sorry! Everyone’s been talking about you today!” My tongue runs over my teeth, smiling a bit, “Thanks for being my mirror. And- congrats, I guess?”

“Thank you. And no problem, I’d never deprive a pretty girl of her lipstick rights.” This makes her laugh and fuck I want to keep her laughing.

She gets a look in her eye, her arms behind her, and her eyes staring up at me, “Well I appreciate it. Like it?” I look at her lips again and I’m beginning to think this is a trick just to make me want to kiss her.

“I do. It suits you.” Her lips pull into a wide smile and she steps a bit closer. “You know- people are talking about me for a reason.” I say, building myself up a bit.

She squints, “Right… A win?” I nod, “You’re celebrating then?”

I nod again, “A bit boring though… if only there was a girl to make my night better.”

She scoffs, “Suppose you want a winning kiss then?” I eye her, sipping my drink once more. My eyes flick to her lips but she doesn’t stop looking at me.

“I mean- your lipstick would look great on me.” I say smugly as she stops herself from smiling, humming and nodding.

“Would it?” She says into my ear, the club getting louder with the music.

“Suppose we’ll have to check and see.” I say in her ear this time and when I pull back, I can tell she’s trying to figure me out.

She hums again, leaning in close and slipping her hand onto my neck. Her cool rings practically sting my hot skin. She turns my head slightly, I feel her stand taller to softly kiss my cheek.

When she pulls away, I’m smirking again, “Let me get your number.” I don’t even ask it as a question.

She pulls the lipliner out of her bag once more, uncapping it with her teeth and taking my arm. She scrolls the numbers slowly against my arm, holding me close.

When she’s done and there’s red numbers up my arm, she closes the product and smiles kindly, saying “Congratulations, winner.” before walking away.

[certifiedlovergirlsstuff]

your knight to the rescue

pairing: dick grayson x gn!reader

WC: 1.8K

warnings: cursing, creepy older man, sexual tension? i think thats it.

summary: being a plus one has its perks and downsides.

A/N: i wrote this for @alecmores​ my editor and friend since they did a fic for my birthday this year. a little reward for having to read all my stories and listen to me talk nonsense in chat.

also tried to make this as gender neutral as possible. so if theres something that comes off as fem presenting just let me know and ill fix it!

also used two prompts from @urfriendlywriter​ , forced proximity numbers 3 and 4 

in the drafts since may13

masterlist / dick grayson

“please, y/n! you’ll be doing me a solid!”

“if you get on your knees and start begging i might consider throwing myself to the wolves.”

you were just joking, you would’ve done anything dick asked of you. but he got on his knees with his hands clasped in front of his face and put on his best puppy dog eyes. oh! he really didn’t want to go.

“y/n l/n, will you do your best friend in the whole world a huge favor and be my plus one to this wayne gala event?” he even shuffled closer and leaned his head against your thighs as you leaned against the cave computer.

without a thought you set a hand on the crown of his raven hair and run your fingers through the strands. “can we get a big belly burger after?” you know the gala will only have alcohol and finger food.

dick moved his head as his chin sat on the meat of your thighs so he could look directly into your eyes. “of course, y/n. what kind of friend would i be if i let you starve yourself on my time?”

“a terrible friend.”

“and i am anything but a terrible friend.” he groaned as he pushed himself from the floor and walked to the suit displays.

“sure you should be going out? i heard you groan from just getting off the floor, you might be getting old.” you followed behind with your arms crossed over your chest.

dick just threw a middle finger over his shoulder, not wasting his time to look your way. “fuck you. i’m in my twenties, this is my prime.”

“yeah, okay, boy wonder.”

dick grabbed his black and blue outfit before heading to a changing area. you lingered around and the silence slowly got to your head. your fingers bit into your biceps and looked down at your slippers.

“just… just be careful, dick.” you scrunch your face at your simple wording, “cause- cause i’m sure alfred is tired of patching you up. and- and you don’t want to look a mess at the gala… could cause some rumors or something.” rambling just so it doesn’t seem like you care too deeply for dick’s safety. honestly just saying, “i like you dick grayson, so don’t be an idiot as you’re backflipping off buildings.” would be a lot easier than what just came out your mouth.

dick stepped back into the cold cave and stood in front of you. his black eye mask was in place along with his gear all secured in their compartments. you couldn’t see his baby blues due to the white holes staring back at you, but he had a smirk on his lips that made you scuff without knowing his next words.

“worried about my safety?” he copied your arms-crossed stance. his head cocked to the side. you narrowed your eyes, “no shit, dumbass. you're fighting criminals, street level and insane.”

you rolled your lips, “i know it’s unavoidable at times, just…” you sighed, “just don’t get in the line of fire if you can.” you touched his arm before walking away and back up the spiral stairs.

in your rush to leave you missed how dick’s arms fell and his smirk vanished in a blink. hidden eyes watching your every step until you were gone from his sight.

-

“i want big belly burger.”

“all in due time, y/n.”

your hands tugged at the nice, but tight fabric of your black formal attire. you even shuffled on your feet, already feeling the blisters forming. you were used to loose and flowy clothing with sneakers or slippers since you worked behind the scenes.

with you knowing there would be cameras in attendance, you took extra long to make sure you were presentable and cleaned well. especially since you would be standing beside dick for most of the event, you didn’t want to look like sewer trash next to a sculpted statue.

“stop fidgeting,” dick leaned close to your ear, “you look marvelous.” his breath caressed your ear and you had to suppress the shiver it caused.

leaving the outfit alone, your hands clasped over your stomach. a more appropriate gesture than arms crossed as you stare down the boring one percenters. you could spot bruce somewhere in the distance chatting along with some people, and you could spot his fake laughing from a mile away. letting your eyes scan the room you land on detective gordon, who’s tucked away in a corner with his hands shoved in his khaki trench coat.

“looks like gordon didn’t get the dress code memo.” giving dick a hit from your elbow as you knocked your chin in the cop’s direction.

“wants a little attention. nothing wrong with that.” and something about that last part… “i’m- i’m gonna get a drink. i’ll- i’ll be right back.” and you hurried off before dick could stop you.

politely moving through the sea of people, you landed at the open bar. palms wrapping around the cool granite counter, you leaned forward and waved down a bartender. he was very handsome, but he wasn’t-

“just champagne, please. thank you.”

the flute of bubbling amber liquid sat in front of you and the bartender left to help others. you fiddled with the stem and bottom, giving the liquid a little swirling making the bubbles fizzle. you held the glass in hand as you turned your back to the counter and faced the chatting party. you needed a breather from grayson.

from the corner of your eye, you saw an older gentleman saddle up to the bar top, right next to you. to close for comfort. you could feel the air shift as he moved his arm, suit jacket popping your bubble. you stiffened, not feeling brave enough to make it obvious that he was the cause of discomfort. now you wished dick would come to your rescue and lead you away, on the other side of the room would be nice.

“may i just say,” his hand touched you, “you are a visionary.” fingers moving caused goosebumps. you had to swallow the acid rising.

“you're too kind.” fake smiled as you raised your glass. where is dick?

“are you here alone? how do you know bruce wayne?” the man questioned. moving closer, his chest almost bumping yours.

you licked your lips, “i’m a- a worker for bruce wayne… secretary. or personal assistant to mister wayne.” not too much of a fib. “and i’m here with someone. i should,” you pointed a finger at the crowd, “i should go look for him.”

the man’s grimy fingers trapped your wrist after just a step and tugged you into his body. his breathing grating against your ear and neck, “what’s the rush? i’m sure your friend can wait.”

“really, i should-“ he slipped an arm over your waist and you shut down. it’s like you were hit with mr. freeze’s ice gun.

your heart started hammering and your eyes were darting around for any sight of him. your chest was heaving, your panic growing the longer his touch and breath were on your body.

“how about we-“ “there you are, baby. i was starting to get worried.”

it’s like an angel was sent to save you from death. the chandelier lighting cast dick in a halo of blinding light. his tall stature and wide shoulders held with grace and strength. his dark black hair swept in a clean style as his piercing irises stared the man down. you heard the gasp and took a shallow breath when you felt him move away.

dick held a hand out and you grasped it like a lifeline as he tucked you into his side. arm protective on your waist and fingers splayed, it was the warmth you need after freezing to death. your arm circled his waist to pull him even closer, head falling to his chest. he even positioned himself to where you were less in the older man’s eye line, his wider frame acting as a shield.

“who’s your new friend?” dick asked. it came off playful, but you heard the undertone. he was ready to hang him upside down by his shoestrings.

“i’m not sure. haven’t been given a name.” and you haven’t. but you already have his face memorized.

the creep opened and closed his mouth. a fish gasping for water as sharks played with their dinner. you tried to give the air of innocence to compliment dick’s bomb that was slowly ticking with each second.

he stuck his hand out for a friendly shake, “dick grayson. nice to meet you…” he trailed off. waiting for the answer before he searched him up on the computer back home.

the man took his outstretched hand, “mr. cooper. pleasure to meet you.” and you saw the flash of pain over his face. dick’s grip looked like it could crush a skull.

“mr. cooper, well i hope you have an excellent evening. if you don’t mind, i’d like to steal my dance partner back.” without waiting, he walked the both of you away. you left your champagne behind without a thought.

near the edge of the dance floor on the other side was where dick planted the both of you. he held your right hand in his while his left hand settled at the small of your back. you let your left-hand rest on his strong shoulder. it wasn’t much dancing, just bodies swaying.

“thank you… for back there-“ “no need to thank me. i would do it again in a heartbeat.”

his eyes twinkled. your heartbeat stuttered.

the orchestra continued their melodic strumming and you let yourself get swept away. eyes closing, you leaned your head on dick’s dress shirt. right near his heart. the smell of citrus and pine invaded your senses and you almost got dizzy. the hand on your back pressed in harder and then rubbed along your spine.

you almost snapped your eyes open at the feeling of dick’s lips being pressed to your temple. and it wasn’t just a simple peck, it lingered. your body felt hot and you would bet ten bucks your ears were burning red. his lips moved and then he nudged his nose against your hairline as he sighed. 

“i still want a big belly burger.”

your hunger broke the romantic moment.

feeling dick’s laugh through his chest and hearing the boyish noise lit you up. pressing your chin into his shirt, you made eye contact and both flashed smiles.

“wanna ditch?” “you make it sound like high school.” hands tightening. he grinned, “you're right. i think it’s time to leave.”

and dick grayson, being your knight in shining armor, led the both of you out of the stuffy venue. and he took the waiting chariot to the closet's big belly so you could stuff your face with food you’ve been waiting to scarf down. 

and as you moaned with ketchup at the corner of your mouth and chugged soda, dick grayson thought you were the best thing to ever happen to him. and he would do anything to keep you safe and smiling.

...

[bi-bard]

If I Could Leave, I Would've Already Left - Luca Imagine [The Bear]

Title: If I Could Leave, I Would've Already Left

Pairing: Luca X Reader

Based On: Paul Revere

Word Count: 1,413 words

Warning(s): mention of breakdown/mental health issues

Summary: When Luca left for Copenhagen, he didn't mean to leave (Y/n) completely on their own. After years of not talking, he finally finds that nerve to reconnect with them, deciding to invite them out to visit. At first, all seems well, but something is clearly off... Luca just has to get (Y/n) to admit that.

Author's Note: I changed who this story was going to be about so I could give y'all this. Don't say that I don't do anything for you.

NOAH KAHAN - STICK SEASON [WE'LL ALL BE HERE FOREVER] WRITING CHALLENGE MASTERLIST

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I felt a pit in my stomach as I walked to the door of the restaurant.

This wasn't even my place of employment. I had no obligations or expectations here, but I still had raging anxiety sitting in my chest.

Maybe it was the association I had with early rising and restaurant doors. Maybe it was the memories of yelling and pressure and intensity. Maybe it wasn't related to any of that. Maybe it was all just fear over seeing someone that I hadn't seen in a while that meant the world to me.

I shook my head, trying to calm myself down. It wasn't successful.

Once I accepted that I couldn't just dismiss my anxiety, I picked up my hand and knocked on the door.

I stepped backward, taking a few more deep breaths.

The front door opened suddenly. I felt a need to collapse to the ground when I saw Luca in the doorway. I fought that need.

"Hey," I said awkwardly, messing around with the strap of my duffel bag.

"You made it," he replied happily, stepping forward to hug me tightly. I closed my eyes as I hugged him back. "I told you to call me when you were on your way. I would have made plans to get you settled."

"I know, I know," I muttered as I stepped back.

"I'll call someone in, so I can get you set up in the guest room-"

"No, no," I shook my head. "I came here to see where you're working. That was your offer."

He chuckled. "Well, come on in then."

I followed him into the restaurant. I looked around at the sparkling location. Shining counters, organized inventory, the blue sign just under the clock that read 'Every Second Counts'.

"What do you think," he asked.

"It's beautiful," I mumbled, still looking around the entire building.

"Oh, believe me, this is nothing," he waved it off. I looked back at him. "Well, nothing when compared to the quality of the food."

I chuckled. "Impress me."

"I always do."

He tapped a part of the steel tabletop so I could stand across from him. He continued working while I put my bag down next to me.

It felt weird to watch someone else cook. I had grown so accustomed to running around the kitchen and getting as much work done as physically possible. But now, I was standing there, twiddling my thumbs. It just felt... wrong.

"Do you... Do you need help with anything," I asked.

"No, no," he shook his head. "I am making something for you. You are on a trip."

I held my hands up. "Alright, alright."

The silence after that was nice.

It was the first time since getting on the flight that I didn't find myself fixated on the work that I was missing. I was finally letting myself breathe. I couldn't relax fully. I don't think that I had the ability to. It was still momentary bliss.

"How've you been," Luca said after a while.

"Good, good," I replied, playing it as polite. Like I would speak with my relatives at big family dinners and shit like that.

"You're still working in Chicago?"

"I haven't worked there in a while," I explained. "I moved to New York. Carmen Berzatto apparently mentioned my name a while ago."

"He did?"

I nodded.

"I don't remember him ever being that kind... did he have a change of heart?"

"Honestly, I think it was an accident."

Luca laughed, having to stop what he was doing for a few moments. "That sounds more like him."

I chuckled with him.

"But New York is good?"

"Yeah, yeah. It's the dream, right? The big-time restaurant and the fancy guests."

"I guess so."

His eyes moved to me. I saw them trace me, looking for a sign of... something. I shifted a bit in my spot, grinning at him. I wanted to know what he was looking for. I wanted to know what he was thinking of me.

"How are you doing," he said.

"You asked that already."

"I know but you told me that everything is good yet you're sitting in front of me on a very sudden trip to a different country."

"You invited me out to visit-"

"Yet you didn't tell me when you were on your way."

I froze. He was right.

"What's going on?"

I took a deep breath. "I... I took a leave of absence."

"What," he asked. "Can I ask why?"

"I... I broke," I confessed.

Admitting it felt like some kind of betrayal to myself. I was already dealing with enough guilt from running away from work, but now there was even more guilt because it wasn't just because of my own weakness.

"I was in the kitchen, in the middle of dinner rush, and then everything felt like it froze," I continued. "And I... I couldn't move or talk. I was just... gone. And then, it all hit me at once. I couldn't breathe. Nothing made sense. Everything was going too fast. It just... it wouldn't go back to normal.

"If it had just been that once, then I could have explained it away as nothing. But it just kept happening over and over.

"I could hide it for a while but then, I just kind of snapped. I ran out of the kitchen; I hid in the alley out back and just sobbed. I just remember thinking that I had to get out. So, I decided to take the leave of absence and try to figure out what the fuck was wrong with me."

"I'm sorry," Luca said. "That sounds terrifying."

I just kind of shrugged.

"Are you... Are you seeing a therapist at all?"

"I have an appointment set for when I get home. I just... I needed something- someone familiar."

Luca stepped out from behind the counter so he could drag me into another tight hug. I closed my eyes, hiding my face in his shoulder. That was the most detail I had told anyone about how I had been feeling.

"Can I ask you something," he asked after a little while. I hummed. "Why don't you just leave entirely?"

I scoffed as I stepped back. "And go where?"

"I don't know... here?"

I shook my head.

"I could put in a good word-"

"I can't do that," I stopped him. "I can't just run away."

"Why not?"

"Do you have any idea how hard I have worked for this?" I snapped. "How much of my life has been dedicated to this?"

"That doesn't mean that you have to end up hurting yourself!"

"You don't get it!" I stepped even farther away. "I don't just do this for me. New York is the best place for me to make everyone happy. It's for my family whether it be supporting them or giving my mom a chance to see her dream that she didn't get to pursue or for my dad to get the chance to be proud of me. All of this goes so far beyond me! It's not that I don't want to leave! I can't!"

Luca didn't reply.

"I... I look at my parents and all I can think of is how disappointed they'd be if I didn't keep going, keep pushing myself."

"I'm... I'm sorry."

I looked away before stubbornly wiping away any tears that found their way to my eyes. "I'll... I'll leave it all one day. I'll leave all of it behind and find something that doesn't terrify me as much, but I just... I can't yet. I can't."

"I shouldn't have pushed so hard," he replied. "I... I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," I mumbled, running my hands over my face. "Can we just... Can we focus on literally anything else?"

He nodded, going to step around the counter again. "I've thought about you a lot over the last few years."

"Really," I asked.

"Yeah. I... I always felt... wrong for leaving the way that I did. I felt like I had abandoned you."

"If it helps, I never thought that. I just hoped that you were happy."

He offered a grin in response.

He started working again.

As silence surrounded us, the air seemed to shift. The weight wasn't gone. I don't think it ever would be. But it was lighter. As if I wasn't holding it on my own anymore.

And maybe that extra pair of hands was all I needed for now.

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Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

[lnkedmyheart]

Vld rewatch was a wild trip honestly. My general opinions are as follows:

Generic ass show. I'm not entirely sure why it took off as much as it did but it was generic af.

I still stand by that the Alteans spout some serious "white man's burden" type of shit. Very reminiscent of all the shit I spent slogging over in my postcol lectures.

I'm still shook that people never pointed out Alfor literally nuked Daibazaal and basically forced the Galrans into exile.

Haggar's character died when she remembered she's a mom.

I may not be huge on Allura given some of the really weird choices made with the Alteans but damn you really murked the victim of a genocide for the greater good, huh?

Kl fans really thought their ship was gonna be canon cause a couple people on the show drew art for it. I guess Revy and Roberta have been screwing behind the scenes.

Shiro is my son and the only good thing second to my best friend acquisition to come out of vld. I would have added Zarkon but we literally had only 2 seasons of him before his daddy ass was nuked.

I originally went in expecting ka1lura because that's how it always went and started actually liking a1lurance by the end. Yes it was developed pretty well all things considered. Only one other duo was developed more than them and it wasn't the two twinks.

I like the MFE pilots more than the paladins given that the latter's bond was non existent by the end.

Hunk and Shay were not a good couple in terms of development. Sorry it's cute but it's boring as fuck. No build up, they meet, the fat guy liked the fat girl and they immediately start dating. That's the way of the fat peeps in media. Lord forbid we give people who aren't skinny actual developed love stories.

My use of the word daddy is reserved for two fictional men. He's one of them.

Keith, Matt, Ezor and Allura were the prettiest characters. I can see why everyone wanted a piece of Keith in particular for their ships.

Keith x Axca would have been the lamest endgame. My boy is running around in space, is a part alien and with so many unique looking characters around him only to end up with the alien with the most uninteresting character design is just ridiculous. Had she looked buff like Zethrid or unusual like Ezor I'd have been down for it.

Krolia had bad character design. She's a generic fem galra Keith au fan art.

You couldn't get me to take [Man]'s existence seriously. If you put a loaded gun to my head and demanded I do I'd squeeze your trigger finger and off myself instead.

Shiro's new arm is UGLY.

The castle of lions looks like a giant fancy dildo.

Lotor's arc was dumb. Loved the racism of Lotor's Altean side being praised when he's faking goodness but a Galran when he's evil? As if it's not his Altean mother's obsessive ambition that led to his downfall while Zarkon literally went mad because of his love and devotion for Honerva? Oh right, Alteans good Galra bad. My mistake.

LM and JDS don't deserve a fraction of the slander they still keep getting. The show was bad in the way a generic idea tends to be when you have a bunch of different writers.

S8 is objectively awful but the quality declined after s2.

I hate their chins. Shiro was the only one with a chin I could get behind.

I really want to go back to that time when we used to slap "Disclaimer: I do not own *insert show name*. The show and all the characters are the property of *insert company/creator's name*". It will definitely reduce the obscene entitlement amongst modern audiences.

[cassius-casim]

Despite My Despair:Chapter 2

 Trigger Warnings:Historically acurrate ableism , mentions of violence / injuries , senskry overload aftermath, mentions of war , unhealthy coping habits.

Word Count: 3900

⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎⚣︎

(Tommy’s Pov) 

Thank fucking god that was over.

That meeting was a total shit show. Leaving the room gave me instant relief.The room that  was calm at first glance, but upon further inspection revealed a choking atmosphere. One that only needed a spark to set it alight.This looked completely different. As it was loud and with so many people , it was hard to get around the place . The warm light gave a relaxed air , taking solace in . How the fuck was  this meant to work and not ruin everything I have, without losing Aunt Pol, that through Kimber we wouldn’t have to worry anymore. As much as  what we have going on is good I can't risk it . Not with what I have now.

Filtering across the busy bar to go see Harry, who was helping the barmaid manage the crowd,when it starts to calm down I piped up:

“Hey Harry, can I get another one of these?” 

“Yeah sure Tommy.”He took my glass , as seeing the familiar honey coloured liquor it contained asking what was bothering me . 

“Thanks,has Polly already left with Cassius?” 

“Polly left but I hadn't seen Cassius with her.” 

Thank god at least we won’t have to fight about this aga-. wait did he say ? That can’t be right , someone else must’ve picked him up.

“Did he leave with someone else ?” 

He must’ve , no-one would be thick enough to  leave him by himself.

“No. Honestly I haven't seen him for a while now.”

No.This can't be happening. How can this be happening?

“Harry , when was the last time you saw him?” I asked while willing myself to remain calm. 

“When you were with him about an hour ago?” 

My eyes bounce across the room , maybe he’s around here somewhere? But no , no matter how hard I look I can't find him anywhere.

Fuck. Okay Tommy calm down.We need to get it together . I need to get Arthur now , whilst using all my willpower to keep it together with each step I take.

“Arthur, have you seen Cassius?” 

“No Tom, is something wrong?” 

“I don't know where he is , he hasn't left with Pol or anyone else.”

“Fuckin hell….right I will ask around to see if someone has seen him,don't worry we'll find him.”

“Alright”. 

Leaning against the bar I once again force myself to relax , he wouldn't leave the building by himself but then why would he still be here? And how come nobody knows where he is ?

“Tommy , come over here !”

Head snapping up ,springing off my chair to go where Arthur was gesturing.  

“Yes Arthur, have you found him ?” 

“No but I think I found out where he might be.One of the guys-”

 He gestures to a conflicted weasel of a man whose soul seemed set on leaving his body. That paired with a large stain on the front of his shirt. He was surrounded by his group of friends who were loud and incoherent ,at the bar 

“-saw him in the bathroom.”

“When was this ?” 

“Like 15 minutes ago.But Tom he said tha-”

I didn't let him finish that sentence before barging into the bathroom calling out:

“Princely,  are you alright?”

Hoping that he would be there , while my eyes adjusted to the dim light of the bathroom wondering my next move. Is he okay? What do I do if he's hurt? 

Under the flickering light bulb there laid Cassius curled up on the dirty wooden floor , hitting his head in a frenzy  whilst looking in  agony. Making weird sounds impossible to make out. Running over to him wanting to help but not knowing what to do.

It hurts to see him like this but I must push my feelings aside as he needs me now. Taking a deep breath to get my shit together,trying to figure out what to do. Asking gently as possible:

“ Princely are you okay, what's wrong?”

Please don't be hurt.

 “Noise….it's too loud.”

 He strains out as he rocks back and forth.

“Is it okay if I hold you ?” asking gently  as to not upset him further.

As nodded ,  I moved over to hold him from behind, wrapping my arms around him to stop him from harming himself . Holding him I think : 

How did this happen?  How could nobody notice?

Does he need to go to a doctor? But the answers to those questions had to wait. First priority was getting him home safely. 

“Princely I'm gonna take you home now. Do you want to walk or do you want me to carry you?”

“...carry”, he responded faintly. 

Placing my arms under him whilst lifting him up bridal style carefully as possibly  to not cause any further harm.Just as I was about to reach the door Arthur bursts in  with his usual loud voice.

“Tommy oh thank god I found yo-"

he stops as his entire expression shifts as he takes everything in front of him. Lowering his voice he asks 

 “Tommy, are you alright? What’s happening?” 

Honestly I don't even know the answer to that question.

“I don’t know Art ,Cassius is not doing well. I need you to go get the car ready so I can take him home.” 

“Will do.I’ll meet you out front.”

Getting ready to leave the bathroom , it gives me time to re-examine the situation.Judging by how Princely looks I need to get him out NOW. Once I finally get the door open with one hand my eyes strain from the sudden shift to the bright light while simultaneously getting hit with the smell of smoke,booze and wood.Feeling something down my arm, I see Cassius trying to hide his face in my neck, shielding himself from someone's gaze. It’s the beer stain guy from earlier,talking to a group of people surrounding him while pointing in our direction. For what reason? Zeroing in on his group his voice carries across the short distance:

“-and then I saw this cretin spazzing out on the floor acting like he-”

Son of a bitch.As much the idea of me dealing with him is appealing I have to take care of Cassius. Resuming my journey out of this buildung inconspicuously proves challenging.

“Wait, is that the freak you were on over there?”

Oh for fucks sake.

Turning back around which lets me get a better look at them,even though they're a group,only two of them are actively in the conversation: beer stain and this other guy who looks in a sort of daze. But it’s clear they're both shit-faced, if their red-toned, snow-powdered faces are any indication.

“Yeah that's him, you should have seen him earlier, acting like he belongs in a looney bin.”

“Wait, is that Tommy Shelby carrying him?”

“Probably to spare us the misery, by the looks of him he needs to be put down.”

“Why don't you deal with him yourself?”

“You’d need to pay me to touch a lunatic like him.”

“How about I buy you another pint if you do?”

“Deal”, beer-stain responds with intent.

He shuffles off his seat ,turning his attention to me as he approaches. 

 “Alright Mr Shelby, let me get that freak off ya hands.”

He says whilst looking at Cassius as though he was something to dispose of.Did he not know what he is doing? Jesus, how much Snow did he take ? 

“No. Get the fuck away from him .”

“What? Why’re you defending this freak?”

“That's none of your fucking buisness .”

“None of my fucking buisness? This imbecile is the reason jobs that should be going to men like us , men that fought for this country instead they are going to freaks like him. Freaks that are taking away money that could help us and you don't want to fix this?”

His anger is not unjustified but his target is wrong.

“You're blaming your lack of a job on him?”

“ No Mister Shelby”

 He walks closer to me, putting his hand on my arm while getting so close that I could see the individual hairs on his moustache. He must be so far gone if he thought this pathetic display would be seen as intimidating.

 “I'm saying that those like him are a burden on us.After all,that happened to us in the war why should he get the benefits that we deserve by doing fuck all? If anything we would be claiming what is rightfully ours.”

What in the actual fuck? As much as the desire to beat the living shit out of them grows by the second, it's not worth it and inconvenient. Why beat up a man clearly in turmoil? A man whose means of coping is not different to my own? But getting Cassius home safe is at the forefront of my mind. My first priority. Thiugh how the fuck am I meant to manage that with beer stain blocking the door?  Just from first look alone, getting out of this could get ugly, so I’m double fucked. I cant fight without risking Cassius getting hurt  and they’re too far gone to be reasoned with.So what do I do now?

SLAM

Oh thank god.

Arthur burst in his usual fashion.

“There you are Tommy! Thought you got lost.”

Sensing the tense air, Arthur shifts with stance from casual to anticipatory, ready to spring into action.

“What’s going on here?”

 Arthur said, tone filled with apprehension.

Turning over to me he sees what’s happening: me trying to leave with Cassius and how beer stain guy is stopping that from happening.

“I was just about to leave.” 

“He's free to after he hands that idiot over.”

“Why would he do that?”

“Because like I told him , that thing needs to be put down.”

“YOU FUCKIN BASTARD”

Arthur roars lunging close to bear-stain leaving him to veer off to the side.

With that sentence the whole atmosphere around me changes to a whole new level of chaos setting off as Arthur punches beer stain man in the face. Suddenly, the whole pub shifts from eerily quiet to a total brawl as men are fighting each other with whatever they can get their hands on. Debris littering the floor. Violence for the sake of violence, no reason necessary.

Dodging this mess was challenging to say the least, continuing to navigate my way out of here between dodging flying fists and the onslaught of objects in my way. As I approached the exit, I proceeded to scan my surroundings in all directions, on my way out noticing Grace looking at me. She seemed largely unaffected by what was happening, with how despite the chaos in front of her her station is somehow clean. Though that didn’t explain the annoyance in her gaze which though significant at first glance but insignificant in terms of current priorities.

Princely I hope you didn't hear anything those bastards said.

Finally in what seemed like forever, we made it outside unscathed. Taking advantage of the calm we rush to the car as quickly as possible. Thinking about what to do once I got there. It took me longer than it should to start the car, even though the car was going as fast as it would go, everything around me felt suspended in time. For now everything is alrigh-

HONK

THAT FUCKING BASTARD . WHAT WAS HE THINKING!? Wait, did I hit someone? Why is there yelling? Looking back to see Princely freaking out, curling into a ball whilst yelling and crying at the same time. 

Getting out to open his door ,pulling him into my arms , stroking his hair whilst trying to do my best to comfort him.

“Princely, it's okay. The car is gone, everything is going to be okay”. 

“I know you can’t talk right now but I’m here, we’re not that far from home now. You think you are ready to continue our way home.”

He nods 

Getting back into the car,we continue our way back looking at Princely through the side windows , bloody hell he looks so out of it like a walking corpse.

When we finally approach home, we are greeted by the familiar light from the house.Picking Cassius up,he looks so out of he I don't think he knows what is happening,getting us to the door which when i finally manage to open . Cause ruckus due to forgetting that I was carrying Cassius . Who knocked over the coat rack.

“Tommy what is happening?”

Turning around to see Ada who looks dressed up for this time of night.

“Ada what are you doing up?”

“Waiting for you, now tell me what’s going on?”

“Cassius was left alone at the Garrison when I found him he was like this . I don’t know what to do.”

“Tommy, listen, it's going to be okay. Take him upstairs and get him ready for bed. I'll make him a plate of his favourites , I will meet you up there.”

Nodding back I get to the task at hand whilst carrying him up the stairs being careful not to let anything hit him , as I help him get change into his favourite blue nightie… wait what? That can't be right.Double checking to see it again , that can’t be right.There were a sea of purple bruises decorating his back spreading to his right arm which looks like someone dug their nails deep into him,enough to draw blood.It barely looks like a human did this , more like an animal.How on earth did he get these injuries? His job wouldn't do this as how can he get this carrying baggage? And he could have been mugged as he still has his things.His injuries look recent so this must've happened just before he went to the Garrison? Why on earth would he go to the Garrison if that was what happened? Is this why this is happening to him ?

If that's the case no wonder he looks spaced out , poor thing he must still be overwhelmed from what happened hopefully rest will help. While he was nearly ready for bed , the thought stayed in my mind but it wasn’t the right time.As much as I want to ask about his injuries he's in no state to answer.

There is a knock on the door.

“Tommy, can I come in?”

“Yeah Ada come in”

“Hey Cassius , here are the biscuits you made here and some Ribena. It will be right here if you need it.” 

As she places it on the side table.

“thanks”

“Do you need anything else?”

 “no ,thank you.”

“Okay but if you need anything me and Tommy will be downstairs okay?”

How is she doing this so effortlessly , has this happened before?

 She turn over to me

“Let’s talk downstairs okay?”

“Okay”

I tuck Princely in

 

“Night , night Princely” 

After kissing him good night , dressing to my nightie to get comfortable.Then I went downstairs to talk to Ada. She is at the living room drinking whiskey looking like a lot of on her mind.She notices me staring, lifts up the bottle:

“Hey, you want some?”

“Fuck yes”

Sitting down on the chair next to her, the exhaustion I didn't know I had now hits me. 

“How are you feeling?”

“Honestly? Shit. I found the man who I love suffering but I couldn't even help him.”

“Tommy, you didn’t know what to do , this is your first time seeing this.”

“Someone had beaten him before?”

“What? What are you on about?”

“When getting him ready for bed,I saw bruises and marks on his body.Isn’t that what caused this?”

Ada looks at a loss for words

“No Tommy, that isn’t how this works.Did he mention anything to you?”

Ada got up from her chair to get more whiskey.

“No ,nothing”

“Oh shit.”

 Ada exclaims whilst looking at the back of her chair.

“What?”

“Tommy, you should see this.”

With that she throws the coat at him . Looking closely at it it's Cassius's work coat but the damage on it doesn't completely match his injuries. As one of the sleeves was torn , so how did he get the puncture wounds ?

“How the fuck did this happen?”

“No idea but trust me when I say me and Pol are gonna get to the bottom of this.”

“thanks Ada but can I ask you something?”

“Go for it”

“You said this happened before , what happened?”

“It was during the War when it happened . Cassius was at the factory coming home from work when we were meant to be expecting letters from home .Arthur and Johns came but yours didn’t that set him off.Since he was  he was convinced you were dead as according to him you promised you would never forget to write to him . He then freaked out, hitting himself , not talking, and made weird noises whilst rocking back and forth.”

“I didn’t think he would notice.”

“Why do you think that? He would bake something on the day he got it to celebrate you surviving, he thought it gave you good luck.Honestly i felt that was the only reason it kept him sane at the time.”

That explains why he likes baking so much. 

“Did you take him to a Doctor?”

“Yeah me and Polly took him down to one , we thought it was hysteria at first but when he looked at him . He told us that he was insane,even ranked him as feeble minded and told us he shouldn't go out and about . Saying he needs to be put in a colony.”

Wait what? That can’t be right.

“Colony? He wanted you to send him abroad during a war?”

“Not that type of colony, it's where they sent people like Cassius to villages where they would be taken care of.”

“Why didn’t you send him there?”

“Because if i did then you wouldn’t’ve seen him again.”

“What?” 

What does she mean by that?

“Tommy, when someone is sent to the colony, they are separated from society so no one ever sees them again.”

“Bloody hell.”

“Luckily for us , the people in the Colonies were working in the factories so the Doctor couldn’t send him there. Yeah so after that , me and Pol figured that he only had these episodes when overwhelmed or things were getting to him like if the noise was too loud.”

“What was happening here ,besides the whole letter thing, that could lead to him being overwhelmed?”

“Just because you were fighting a war over there , it didn’t mean that we weren’t affected here.”

“How?” 

I thought only those that fought suffered how they did suffer? I thought they were safe from it.

“The years where we spent in fear not knowing whether our loved ones would die every day,where we had to work ourselves to exhaustion to get by , fearing for our lives if we lost, what would happen to us? It messed us all up to the point we had to find different ways to deal with it :Polly had to pray every night to sleep,Cassius had to bake everyday to keep it together and read your letters constantly,and I had to keep myself busy so I wouldn't think about it in order to survive.”

“So how come he never told me this?”

“He’s scared.”

“Scared?”

“He’s afraid that even though you love you won’t be able to understand him no matter what happens so he’s afraid for you to see this part of him in case he scares you away.”

“I feel the same way towards him. But that doesn’t make sense. He helped me through the shock after I came back.”

“You’re not seen as a lesser for it , he is.”

“ Fuck Ada what do i do now?”

“Talk to him about this , after me and Polly find out the truth.Until then keep an eye on him and don’t let him near any loud spaces for a while.Okay?”

Getting from my chair I turn back to Ada.

 “Okay, again thank you Ada”

“No problem ,night Tommy”

“Night”

Going back upstairs , what Ada said to me is bouncing through my mind. So this is part of his Autism,but how can I get him to talk to me about this? How do I convince him this is nothing to be ashamed of ? I can’t do this alone but how could I find a doctor that won’t send him to the colonies?

Fuckin hell

On top of the whole Kimber and guns , I wonder how I am even functioning at this point. Thank god i can finally rest.Reaching my bedroom entering as quietly as possible while going back to bed where I left Cassius. Despite everything that has happened today he looks so at peace, something I envy him for ,as I held him in my arms I vow to myself to never let this happen again,never let him think he has to hide this from me again and to find who on earth would do this. I hope Ada and Polly give them hell. 

☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎☟︎︎︎

2 hours later 

Polly emerges from the door,entering gently so as to not wake anyone up in the early hours of the morning.Just as she was about to approach the stairs she notices a figure in the living room, hunched over drinking. Thinking it was her nephew who was causing a lot of trouble recently her energy returns to speak her mind to him. “Tommy what are playing a-” 

She doesn’t finish her sentence as it is not Tommy but Ada. 

“Ada what are you doing up?” 

“Waiting for you , we need to talk.”

Pulling up a chair Polly sits down preparing for the worst

“What has Tommy done now?”

“Nothing.This is not about Tommy ,it’s about Cassius.”

“What’s happened?”

“Tommy came back freaked out , he was carrying Cassius who was having an episode.Do you have any idea what could’ve caused this?”

“This is important?”

“Yes Polly ,I need to know.”

“Okay Cassius came home with a tattered coat, all he would tell me is that a customer tore it after a petty dispute and his boss docked his wages.”

Ada said nothing , just sat there and took on what Polly said.

“There’s more to this, isn’t there?”

“Tommy thought you had to be hurt to have episodes.”

“ Why on earth would he think that?”

“Because he saw marks on Cassius’s body whilst changing him.”

Polly pauses , as she notices the shift in atmosphere.

“What type of marks Ada?”

“Bruises and a puncture wound , like he had been beaten.”

“Why would he hide this from us Pol?

“We’ve been there for him when he needed us the most, why not tell us about this?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do we ask him?”

“No, we have to find out for ourselves, we don’t want him freaking out anymore than he already has.”

“So where do we start?” 

“You know this boss’s name?”

“Sort of ,I know his secretary Ms Jameson from a dance hall I go to sometimes.”

“Alright, here's what we’re gonna do. We are going to get some rest , god knows we’re gonna need it if we need to get to the bottom of this.I think it’s time we pay that secretary of his a visit don’t you?”

[wrenanigans]

SAW A SKYRIM POST YOU REBLOGGED. SKYRIM FAN???

YES! New skyrim fan! I finally started playing the game 12 years after its release and I am HOOKED! I’m gonna use this ask as an excuse to ramble so uh, long post beware xD

Okay so my first ever run has been the most chaotic shit. I just finished the main questline, but it was a JOURNEY to get there.

I’ve been playing with my gf @bucca2 who introduced me to the game. The first thing she did, as soon as we got out of the tutorial (and got mods working, including multiplayer), was take me to a little farm up north to meet somebody. “You liked Kefka, I think you’ll like this one,” she said. Cryptic and concerning! And I found this wagon and met Cicero.

To quote Aby, “Yeah, honestly, it was like taking a kid to Disneyland for the first time. There was this quiet wonder in his voice like he was discovering magic was real...honestly, I wish I had been recording. It was very adorable. He was hooked from Cicero's first voice line.”

Dude, when I say “blorbo at first sight” I mean I was down bad in an instant. I was writing fanfic based on that interaction alone (with some helpful hints from Aby). I had dreams about the bastard on night one. I got obsessed.

That feral enthusiasm did not wane as the game went on, because I went straight for the Dark Brotherhood questline. I was the Listener before I had even spoken with the Greybeards. I even updated a mod from an old Skyrim edition myself so I could marry Cicero. I was all about that wretched little fool and it was making a fool of me.

With Cicero as my first companion, I went onto the Thieves’ Guild quests next. Did you know that you can fail the tutorial pickpocketing quest? Because that’s what I did! They recruited me anyway. I got up to the Sepulcher quest, but never finished it, so I just have the skeleton key xD

When we assassinated the vampire in the DB questline, I got infected, and decided “eh, why not!” So I became a vampire. This made the inheritance of Bloodchill Manor extra fun — I simply sat back and watched the bloodbath! I only had to lift a finger when the Dawnguard came knocking xD

I went to the Bards’ College next. We’d “acquired” an expansion mod for it (do not get me started on other modders who charge for their shit. i have strong 🏴‍☠️ opinions) so that was a fun extra questline.

Up next was some Daedric prince shenaniganry. I got the Ebony Blade and did some light murderizing to buff it, then met Sanguine for some debauchery. My stealth archer build got even more broken when I stopped by to pick up Barbas from Clavicus Vile. Immortal dog to tank for me? Yes please!

Then I did the Dawnguard questline! I accidentally-on-purpose cheesed the pilgrimage to go fill the ewer. I got so lost in the Vale that I found the palace treasure room when I was only on shrine two. Seeing Serana shove the snow elf bastard off the cliff was fun, though I did miss the loot…

After that, I decided it was time for some warmongering, and signed up for the Imperial Legion. Which was a little awkward, considering I’d assassinated the Emperor already, but what they don’t know can’t hurt me! I had great fun in the battles where I simply perched up high and picked Stormcloaks off, like some sort of nefarious gargoyle. Also, General Tullius? would. He also saved my ass when I got lost in the Whiterun battle and found by 7 or so Stormcloaks, and he tanked while I shot them down. Sometimes the game’s mechanics make for great story :P

Finally, it was time for the mainline quest. I tolerated Delphine until she was no longer useful, at which point I turned to Parthurnax for guidance. Being told to go on a grand quest to find the Elder Scroll I already had was pretty entertaining, especially considering I’d done the same thing with the dragonstone from the first dungeon (which I’d gone to early to retrieve the golden claw). It was also funny as hell when I tried to talk my way into heaven and the only faction dialogue choices I had where the two that the dude didn’t like xD

After that, I went, “well now what? …probably lunch.” So I went and munched on somebody, as a vampiric treat. That’s where I last left my playthrough! I’ve had an absolute blast with the game, even if I am playing it ass-backwards. I may go do the Dragonborn DLC content next. If you have any recommendations for more shit to get up to, I’d love to hear it! Especially if it involves murder xD

[simping4villains]

I got a request for more Phinks content, so here y'all go! Hope you like it!

Warning: Sexual content

~~~~~

Our original plan had failed.

   As soon as we got to the special event island, we were stopped by one of the game's creators and beamed to one of the main cities. Shalnark decided that it would be best for us to find somewhere to rest tonight and regroup in the morning.

   "Come on," he said to us. "There's a place up the road where we can rent lodging for the night."

"So, now what?" I asked while we walked. "Can we still go through with the rest of the mission? We don't have the boat anymore."

He rubbed his chin as he thought. "I guess for now we'll just play the game until we can find another way off of the island."

"What he means," Phinks clarified, "Is that we'll steal whatever cards we need in order to get the treasure. That's what Fei and I did before."

"Right," Shal agreed as he pushed through the front door of one of the city's brick buildings.

The decor inside was very old and rustic-looking. I noticed that there were cobwebs wrapping around the chandelier that hung in the center of the room. There was a small cat-like man sitting in one of the lobby's plush chairs, reading a book. He smiled at us as we came in, hopping up to run behind the counter.

"Hello! What can I do for you folks?"

"We'd like to rent six rooms, please," Shalnark answered.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm afraid I've only got three left."

"Should we go somewhere else?" Franklin asked Shal.

"No, no, we can just pair off—you and Kortopi, Phinks and y/n, and me and Feitan."

   I had a feeling that since I always paired up with Phinks and Feitan for missions, Shalnark would probably have me room with one of them. I guess I should have been relieved that it was Phinks he'd picked. I was still pretty sure that Feitan hated me.

   We grabbed our keys from the man behind the counter and climbed the stairs to our shared room. It was simple and rustic, just as the lobby had been. The only furniture we had was a beat-up writing desk, a nightstand with a dusty lamp, and a bed just big enough for two.

   "God, I'm fucking beat," Phinks said, throwing his bag down and flopping onto the mattress.

   "One bed," I said. "Guess we're sharing?"

   "It's either that or one of us sleeps on the floor, and it sure as shit ain't gonna be me."

   "Alright. I think I'm gonna run down the hall to the bathroom to change."

   "Yeah, I guess I should probably change too," He said, standing up and pulling his shirt off.

   My eyes nearly bulged out of my head with how shocked I was. This man clearly didn't care if I saw him half-naked. And honestly, he had nothing to be ashamed of. Sure, his incredible strength came from his nen, but he still had the rippling muscles to match it. I hadn't meant to stare, but. . .

   "What, see something you like?" He smirked.

   Shit.

   "Fuck off," I snapped and left the room as quickly as possible.

   I could tell by the heat in my cheeks that I was blushing at being caught and I didn't want to give him a reason to keep teasing me. It wasn't even like I was really attracted to Phinks or anything, I was just caught off guard. That was what I kept telling myself as I regained my composure.

   When I came back to the room, he was already in bed with the covers pulled up to his chest—which was still bare. He turned when I entered.

   "Jeez. Took ya long enough."

   I frowned. "You don't always have to be such an ass. I mean, would it kill you to relax for once?"

   "I'm trying, but I had to wait all night for you to put on your massive tshirt."

   I lifted the bottom of it to reveal my shorts. "These, too."

   He threw his arms up. "Christ, forgive me. Those must've taken forever on their own."

   "You're a real dick, you know that?"

   "Yeah, whatever. Get your ass in bed. I'm fucking tired."

   "Fine."

   I climbed under the covers with my back to him and he turned out the light. After an exhausting day, it didn't take long for us to fall asleep.

*****

   I was jolted awake by a sharp kick.

   I sat up, ready to defend against whatever intruder had attacked me, but it was only Phinks and I in the room, and he was still asleep.

   He must've moved a lot in his sleep because he was sprawled out over the majority of the bed, his elbow was digging into my back, and he had taken most of the blanket as well. I tried to take the blanket back, but the force shifted his body a bit and he ended up kicking me again.

   I yelped and kicked him back, giving him a massive shove to move him back onto his side of the bed. He woke up and was immediately pissed.

   "What the hell are you doing?"

   "You're taking up too much of the bed!"

   "Well, you don't need to get physical!"

   "You kicked me first!" I yelled, going to shove him again.

   He caught my wrists. "No I didn't!"

   "Yes you did!"

   "Well, I didn't mean to!"

   "Whatever," I said, breaking out of his grasp. "Give me the blanket!"

   I enhanced my aura as I went to yank the blanket back from him and ended up pulling him along with it. He caught himself with one arm on each side of my head. We both froze.

   I looked down at the way our bodies were now pressed together. My face suddenly felt hot again, but I couldn't run this time.

   Phinks chuckled. "Well, damn. If you wanted me so bad you could've just said so."

   "Shut up! This was an accident!"

   "Oh, really? Cause I don't see you shoving me away."

   "I could say the same for you," I pointed out.

   His cocky grin dropped. "Well—I just—that's because I. . . shut up."

   As if my comment made him fully realize the position we were in, he moved to get off of me. Without thinking, I reached out to stop him, wrapping a hand around his arm.

   He looked back at me. "What are you doing?"

   "I don't know," I answered.

   It was the truth. It was like my brain and body had stop communicating. I was moving without any control. I hadn't even had the idea to snake my hand up his chest and into his hair, but it happened anyway.

   "Do you want me to stop?" I asked, tugging lightly at his golden locks.

   His lashes fluttered ever so lightly at the sensation. "No," he breathed.

   I guided him into a kiss. Our mouths moved together, tentatively at first, but before long we both melted into it. He slid an arm beneath me and held me tighter so that my body arched against him. I couldn't help but let out a small gasp at the action. Phinks used the opportunity to catch my bottom lip between his teeth, pulling a moan from my throat.

   "Oh, you like that?" He teased.

   "Shut up."

   "You can admit it if i'm turning you on."

   I enhanced my aura and flipped us so that I was straddling him. Before he had a chance to recover, I dipped down and bit his neck.

   "Fuck," he hissed, tilting his head back to give me better access.

   I laughed against his skin. "I'll admit it when you do."

   "Well, don't hold your breath. There's nothing for me to admit."

   I sat back up to cock an eyebrow at him. "Really?"

   "Really."

   He was a fucking liar. I could feel how hard he was beneath me. If he was going to play hard-to-get then I'd just have to drag a confession out of him.

   "What's this, then?" I asked, rolling my hips against him.

   He sucked in a breath, trying to keep his composure. "I don't know what you're talking about."

   "This." I repeated the same action.

   He couldn't stop himself from groaning that time, letting his eyes flutter shut for a moment. "Alright, fine. You're turning me on. You're a fucking smokeshow. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

   I affectionately swiped my thumb over his cheek. "It was. Thank you."

   "Don't you have something to say to me?"

   "I said 'thank you.'"

   "You aren't going to tell me how bad you want it?"

   I shrugged. "Meh."

   "Oh, fuck off." He laughed. "You're such a brat."

   He grabbed my hips and started rolling them so that I moved back and forth on his length. With only a few thin layers of fabric between the two of us I could feel every inch—and god, he was right, I did fucking want it.

   He changed the angle of my hips, shifting all of the friction to my clit. My hands shot to his chest when I felt a jolt of pleasure run through my body. I gave him a warning look, but he just flashed me a cocky smile in return.

   "What's wrong?" He slid one of his hands between us, stopping where I was most sensitive. "Is it this?"

   He started rubbing circles over my shorts. I bit my lip, trying to hold back a moan. I didn't want to give Phinks anything else to feed his already inflated ego.

   He laughed again, shaking his head. "Aw, come on, you don't have to hold back for me. It's all yours as soon as you tell me how bad you want it."

   I didn't say anything—hell, I couldn't have opened my mouth without moaning.

   "Fine, if you're gonna be stubborn. . ." He pushed my shorts and panties aside to run his fingers through my folds. "Fuck, you're soaked."

   He found his way to my clit again, sending another shock of pleasure through me. I couldn't hold back my moans this time.

   He smirked. "Yeah? Does that feel good?"

   "You're such an ass," I said, but it did feel good. He'd barely touched me and I could already sense a coil of pleasure beginning to tighten in the pit of my stomach.

   He chuckled. "And you've got a terrible poker face."

   He dipped a finger inside of me, then another, slowly scissoring them. He forced another moan out of me when he curled them over an especially sensitive spot. I tightened my grip on his chest, digging my nails into his skin.

   He drew in a sharp breath, pulling his hand away. "Fuck, are you trying to make me bleed?"

   "Don't stop," I whined.

   I regretted it as soon as the words left my mouth. I hadn't wanted to seem so needy—so desperate for his touch. I thought he'd end up teasing me for it, so I was surprised when he flipped us back over and gave me exactly what I wanted, ripping my shorts and panties off in one move before thrusting his fingers into me at an even faster rate. I threw my head back, arching my back and curling my toes. Phinks took the opportunity to give attention to my neck, planting kisses along my jaw before he made his way up to my ear and nibbled on the lobe.

   "Are you getting close?"

   "Yes," I breathed.

   "I'll let you cum," he murmured, "if you admit that you want it."

   "Want what?" I asked, feeling the coil in my stomach continuing to tighten—the tension threatening to explode at any minute. I thought if I stalled then maybe I wouldn't have to say it.

   He quickly proved to me that that strategy wouldn't work as he moved to pull his hand away again. I grabbed his wrist.

   "Wait! Alright, fine. I do."

   "Do what?"

   "Want it."

   He pressed his thumb to my clit, moving it in slow circles. "Want what?"

   "Y-Ah-You."

   His fingers curled over that same sensitive spot again. "What do you want from me?"

   I was so close. I needed it. I just had to say it.

   "I want you to f-nngh fuck-I want you to fuck me."

   "Oh, that's what you want?"

   "Yes."

   He stopped teasing me with such a slow pace, pumping his fingers faster and making quicker circles over my clit. I could feel the coil of pleasure tightening again. Every movement was working me closer and closer to the edge.

   And then Phinks murmured, "Then you'd better hurry up and cum for me already."

   If my mind weren't completely numbed by the intense pleasure I felt, I would have been pissed that THAT was what pushed me over the edge. But as my orgasm washed over me, I was too dizzied by a blissful fog to be upset, unable to focus on anything but melting into the mattress. I was so distracted by my high that I failed to notice that Phinks had gotten undressed. I didn't realize it until we were making out again and his erection brushed against the inside of my thigh.

   His hands moved under my shirt, pushing it up to guide it over my head. While I was sat up, he reached around to unhook my bra, using our proximity as an opportunity to suck on my neck. I thought he'd lay me back down once my bra was off, but instead he pulled me into his lap so that my legs were wrapped around his waist.

   "Damn," he said as his eyes raked over my body. "You're a fucking dime, you know that?"

   "And you have such a way with words." I moved my hand between us to wrap around his length, moving it up and down at a torturously slow pace.

   He groaned as he let his head fall to my shoulder, pressing his hand into the small of my back so that I was forced closer to him.

   I couldn't help the smirk that tugged at the corners of my mouth. "Something wrong?"

   "Yeah. Quit teasing me like that."

   "Like what?" I asked, playing dumb.

   "Don't act cute. You know what you're doing."

   "What do you mean?"

   He laughed and pulled back to look at me. "You're really gonna do this? After you were practically begging for me to fuck you? Now you're gonna just sit here and play your little games with me? You're really asking for it."

   "I think you're all talk. And besides," I leaned in so our lips were nearly touching. "Who said I didn't still want it?"

   It was like my words had lit a fire inside of him, calling him to action. He grabbed my thighs and lifted me up, lining himself up with my entrance. I slowly sank down on his length until I was resting on his hips.

   "You okay?" He asked, rubbing my thighs.

   "I'm good," I answered. "How are you doing?"

   "Oh, i'm fucking fantastic." He said before catching my lips in a kiss.

   I wrapped my arms around his neck so they rested on his shoulders, giving me the extra bit of leverage I needed to lift myself off of him, just to sink back down again. He groaned against my lips, grabbing my ass. I repeated the motion, building a faster pace. It didn't take long for Phinks to take over. With his grip on my ass he started rocking my hips to meet his thrusts. The whole thing felt incredibly intimate—our arms wrapped around each other, our lips exploring every inch of skin they could find, and our small gasps and moans that filled the air with each movement.

   "Phinks," I breathed when the sting of him stretching me out was gone, replaced by the feeling of pure pleasure.

   "What is it, babe?"

   "Harder."

   "Harder? Shit, I don't wanna break you."

   "Please. I need it," I begged.

   "Fuck, alright. Anything you want. Hold me tighter."

   I braced against his shoulders and hooked my ankles together around his back just in time for him to lift me off of the bed. He carried me to the other side of the room and pinned me up against the wall.

   "You'd better hang on," he said before pulling his hips back and thrusting into me harder than before.

   I threw my head back and moaned, digging my nails into his shoulders. It only encouraged him to go faster. He was ramming into me with so much speed and force that I worried we might break through the wall.

   "You like that?" He asked, gripping my thighs so tight I was sure he'd leave bruises. "You like it when I'm rough like this?"

   "Yes," I whined.

   "You like it when I fuck you nice and deep?" He rolled his hips on an especially hard thrust so that his strokes rubbed over my g-spot.

   The sensation made my back arch off of the wall so that I pressed my body into him. My hands shot to his head, tugging at his hair as I nearly screamed in pleasure.

   "God, yes! Don't fucking stop!"

   He nipped at my neck, repeating the same movement. "That's it. Just like that, baby. That's my good fucking girl."

   He kept fucking me like that, relentlessly abusing my g-spot until he forced another orgasm out of me. I screamed out his name, desperately clawing at his skin. He gave a few more erratic thrusts before spilling inside of me, burying his face in my neck and panting next to my ear.

   Once we'd both recovered a bit, he unhooked my thighs from his hips and set me down. When my feet hit the floor, my legs wobbled beneath me and I nearly fell over before he caught me in his arms.

   "Whoa there, easy."

   "I'm fine," I told him.

   "See, I knew I'd end up breaking you if I gave you what you wanted."

   I rolled my eyes. "Fuck you."

   He smirked. "Again? I'm not sure you could handle another round so soon."

   "God, I hate how cocky you are."

   He just smirked and pressed a kiss to my forehead before moving to my ear. He dropped his voice to a low, teasing tone. "If that were true then you wouldn't be full of my cum right now."

   "Fuck off," I snapped. I could already feel it running down my leg.

   He laughed, knowing he'd won. "Come on, I'm tired as hell after all that."

   We both cleaned up and got dressed before climbing back in bed. As soon as I was under the covers, Phinks scooted up behind me and wrapped an arm around my waist, holding me against him.

   "What are you doing?" I asked, inching away a bit.

   "Trying to spoon you. Will you just quit fighting and let it happen?"

   I gave in and tried to relax in his arms. Before too long his breathing became slow and deep, telling me he'd fallen asleep. I closed my eyes and focused on the comforting warmth of his embrace, falling asleep to the rhythm of his heartbeat.

[wrenreid]

Just Acting

18+ NSFW story | all chapters in masterlist

Chapter Fifteen

"Jess... I uh, I got some shit to tell you,” you say, phone pressed to your ear.

"You did what?!” Jess barges through your apartment door after your brief talk on the phone. A call in which you told her what Matthew and you did.

"Yeah,” you blow out an exaggerated sigh.

"So you do like him!” She gloats.

"No,” you pause for a second. “No. I just had sex with him. There's a difference actually."

"So you like his body though?" Jess raises an eyebrow.

"Oh definitely,” you nod, biting your lip gently.

Jess laughs. "What are you gonna do now?"

"I don't know.”

"Do you want to do it again?"

"I don't know,” you say again, dragging out the last vowel a little.

"Girl,” Jess says sternly but there’s a smug grin on her lips.

"I know, I know. I sound stupid, but like I'm honestly confused myself,” you let out a soft groan. “And I have to see him tomorrow. At work. Where we play a couple.”

"Maybe talk to him? Ask him where you go from there,” Jess suggests.

"Maybe, yeah."

______

You have a few very important scenes coming up for the show. You're nervous, especially for one of them, but it should be entertaining.

You're ready in Delilah's clothes and style, waiting around for your next scene of the day. What you did on the couch you sit on now, not that long ago, burns in your brain. You can almost feel it. You push it back, it's crazy.

A little, and stupid, part of your brain wants to do it again. Wants to feel Matthew, kiss his lips, feel his hair in your hands, his mouth on your neck. What is wrong with you?

You pray that this won't affect your relationship as you leave your trailer and head to the film set. You run into someone coming out of the building when you're going in.

"Might want to watch where you're walking." He says it more sarcastic than rude.

You look up at Matthew, shooting him a sarcastic almost-grin. "Yeah thanks, jackass."

Most of your scenes today are just Delilah at work. It doesn't take any more than 3 hours to film until you're walking back out to the trailers.

"Can't stop thinking about it huh?" Matthew's voice sends shocks on your skin. His breath graces your hair.

You turn around to face him. "You wish," you won't give him satisfaction just yet.

He steps closer to you, touching your arm. "Too bad the first has to be the last." Matthew's voice is low.

"What?"

"Just doing as you said, 'move on with our lives'. Right?" There's a hint of bitterness in his tone.

You inhale, "Right. Yeah."

He looks you up and down, then walks away into his trailer. You're left standing there shocked and confused. You're even confused as to why you are shocked and confused.

You understand now why guys say women are confusing, you can't even comprehend your own feelings right now.

You shake it off, forget this. Matthew was just a one night stand type thing. It was a fluke. A weird, but highly pleasurable fluke.

Okay, Y/n... you're fine. it's out of your mind. You leave for home since you're finished until early tomorrow morning.

You eat some ice cream from your freezer while you sit on the couch, flipping through channels. A sex scene comes on from some random movie, you change it quickly. "Really?"  you say as Matthew's face pops up on the tv from a rerun of Criminal Minds season 13. You change the channel, rolling your eyes.

____

It's been a week since the incident, and you and Matthew have not gotten along one bit. One minute it's sarcastic comments, rude remarks, dirty stares, or just plain ignoring each other.

"You know? You were right that day when you said nothing between us would be anything but our characters. Because quite frankly, you're sort of a bitch in real life,” he spits out.

"Excuse me? I'm a bitch? You're the one who acts like an immature assclown every second of your God damn life,” you tell him, arms crossed, brows furrowed.

"That's not what you said while we were fucking.” The grin on his face is the most annoying, smug bullshit you’ve ever seen.

That's it. That's what triggered you so hard to where you snapped. Your hand connects with Matthew's cheek. "Go fuck yourself," you say and storm off. He's stunned as you walk away.

It's taking everything in you not to cry. Angry crying is the worst, and it's so embarrassing. You're strong. You will not cry.

I hate him. I actually hate him.

_____

"We have to what?" You say, louder than intended. Your eyes widen at the script in your hands.

"I think it says you have to have sex," Aisha says.

"Yes, Aish, thank you," you say sarcastically.

You stare more... Spencer and Delilah sex scene. Sex scene. You and Matthew. You're going to die of embarrassment or murder him before you do.

You can't believe you have to have pretend sex with the asshole who called you a bitch. You knew, that playing a couple, you'd have kiss, but you're not ready for a sex scene. You roll your eyes, throwing your head back in anger. You let out a groan. Why me?!

——

Two words continue to burn in your mind. Sex. Scene. Sex scene with Matthew.

You keep reminding yourself that this is what you signed up for; maybe not faking intimacy with the man you hate right now, but you're an actress and doing things you don't particularly want to is part of the job. You wanted this role, you've got to do it.

The scene is tomorrow, it's your second one of the episode. Everyone else is on set right now while you sit on your couch at home. Matthew is probably plotting some way to make the scene more uncomfortable and angering for you. Sounds like something that asshole would do.

You order a pizza and Jess comes over to your apartment. The two of you watch Netflix and eat.

"How's the Matthew thing going?" She asks, half distracted.

"I'd rather his name not be mentioned in this house,” you warn sternly.

She laughs. "So, well I see."

"Yep, totally."  You roll your eyes, taking a bite of the pizza.

You don't tell her about the upcoming scene. She'll just think it's funny and ironic.

You ask about her girlfriend, and she rambles on. It's nice to see her so happy. Maybe even in love? You haven't felt that way about someone in a long time. Since you were 20. You let Jess continue to talk about her, it's a nice way of distancing yourself from your own stupid life.

Jess and you watch a few more hours of tv until she heads out to see meet her girlfriend and her friends.

"Good luck with Gubler," she says on her way out.

"I definitely need that," you say quietly. "I'll see you later!"

You clean up, putting glasses in the sink and paper plates in the trash. Then, you head to your room and plop down on the bed.

You call Lola, checking in on how school and everything is going. You assure your sister that you'll be visiting as soon as you can.

This acting schedule life has been crazy, you haven't been back home in a while. A part of you likes that you've been away, free from the stress of your parents and exploring Los Angeles on your own. It makes you feel more grown up than turning 34 will.

You slip into a pair of plaid pants and a white t shirt and wash your face and all the other nightly shit you do. You crawl into bed, a knot starting to tug at your stomach.

You wake up from a random ass dream, dreading the day ahead of you. As you get dressed, the knot tugs and pulls tighter in the pit of your stomach. You slip on joggers and a band t shirt, throw on a flannel, and step into white sneakers. Quickly, you comb through your brown hair, wash your face, brush your teeth, and get ready to head out of the door.

Grabbing your keys and a cup of homemade coffee from last night, you head down the stairs and to your car.

You arrive on set around 11am, heading to hair and makeup almost immediately. Your already slightly curly hair is curled more then pulled apart, leaving gorgeous waves.

A natural look as always is applied to your face, then you're sent to grab Delilah's outfit for the day. You put on black jeans, tan healed booties, a blue top, and a tan blazer to tie the look together.

You head down since they told you they were ready for you as soon as makeup, hair, and costume were done.

After talking to the director and marking/ planning the scene, it's time to shoot. This is just a quick scene of Delilah heading home from work early after getting a message from Spencer.

‘I have a surprise for you. Can you get off work for a little while?’

Delilah heads to her place after saying goodbye to her employees. "I'll be back later today, call me if you need anything." She gets in her car and starts the drive to her apartment. She plans to change really quick before going to see what Spencer had planned.

She unlocks her door and finds her boyfriend standing in her living room facing the other way. He's grabbing something.

"Spencer?"

He turns around, holding a rose in his hand. There's a sign above him that reads "happy birthday".

"Happy birthday, Delilah,” he smiles proudly.

"Thank you. But it's not until tomorrow,” she chuckles.

"I know. I didn't know if I'd get another day off this week, so I figured we'd celebrate today," he blushes, handing the rose to her as she approaches.

"Thank you, Spencer." Delilah wraps her arms around him. She looks down at the rose in her hands after pulling away.

"I wasn't sure what your favorite flower is, so..."

"Daisies... but you can never go wrong with a rose." Delilah smiles up at him, kissing him softly.

"Oh I almost forgot, I also got you this," he leads her over to the kitchen table where a cupcake sits in cute packaging. The mini cake says "to d - sr". "I couldn't fit your whole name," he chuckles nervously.

"You made this?"

He nods. "Baking is harder than I thought."

Delilah laughs. "It's perfect."

"You're perfect," he says.

She sits down, motioning for him to do so too. The cupcake is vanilla with purple icing. After taking a couple bites, she offers Spencer the rest of it.

In the kitchen, after washing her hands, she wipes off icing Spencer had gotten on his mouth.

Spencer wipes his thumb along her bottom lip.

"Oh did I have some too?" She chuckles.

"No." He leans in, pressing his lips to hers with desire. The kiss isn't rushed or too slow as their mouths move against each other's. Delilah starts to take her blazer off, he assists her. Their lips begin to move faster, tongues seeming to fight each other in passion. Delilah's fingers find their way to the bottom of Spencer's sweater, and she pulls it up over his head. She looks at his bare chest for a moment before his lips find hers again.

Spencer's pushed her up against a wall now, one hand on the side of her face and the other up against the wall. Her hands tug through his hair as their mouths move faster.

He kisses down her jaw to her neck, sucking just softly at the skin as he fiddles with the buttons of her jeans. Delilah's head leans back against the wall, a small whimper escaping from her mouth.

"Are you okay with this?" He says, slightly out of breath.

"Yes,” she nods eagerly.

He kisses her neck again, then his lips trail down to her chest. Spencer takes her shirt off, then continues to kiss down her body. When he reaches the top of her waistline, he stops.

On his knees, he looks up, asking once again for permission. Once she grants it, he's pulling Delilah's pants down and off her body.

"Spencer-"

Before she knows it, he's grabbing her hand and pulling her into her bedroom. She hovers above him on the bed. "You're so beautiful."

She smiles, leaning down to kiss him. All of her insecurities are pushed away when his mouth his on hers, when she feels his warmth. He flips their positions, gaining dominance.

"I love you," he says. Delilah's hands tangle in his hair as his mouth works on her. Gasps leave her lips as she feels the sensation.

When he's done, she pulls him down to her mouth, kissing him. Her tongue runs along his bottom teeth. "I love you," Delilah says against his mouth.

She helps him remove his pants and boxers before he unclasps her bra while kissing her neck...

Pulling away from her mouth, he asks if she's ready.

"Yes," she answers, nodding.

His pace stays slow for a while, speeding up with each tug she gives his hair. Moans leave both of their mouths as the pace quickens and gets rougher. She silences his groan with her tongue in his mouth.

You can't believe you just filmed that with Matthew. Obviously, you guys didn't actually have sex. But faking it seemed pretty damn real.

You stay silent as the recap of what just happened runs in your mind.

"Brings back memories, doesn't it?" Matthew says quietly in your ear.

It takes all of your strength not to turn around and slap his stupid face again. Instead, your body shivers, and you hate yourself for it.

You rush to your trailer as soon as you're allowed to. Your entire being is filled with fifty different emotions at once. For some reason, you almost want to cry. Maybe it's out of frustration?

You shut your eyes tightly, pushing back any feeling in your body or stupid thoughts. You pull your knees up to your chest and try to slow your breathing.

There's a knock at your door. Shit. You don't want to answer it, or talk to anybody. The trailer door opens, and the person you want to see the least is standing in the door way.

"Go away, Gubler.”

"Look I'm sorry for what I said earlier. And for calling you a bitch. You were right, I was being immature,” he says.

You nod your head, pushing your lips together tightly. "Actually I said you were an immature assclown."

Matthew chuckles slightly, "Ah yes. That."

It's silent for a moment. You can feel the tension between the two of you. It’s full of frustration and annoyance and attraction.

"Y/n, I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to pin you up against a wall since the day I met you.”

You stare at him, wide eyed. Even in shock, you make a sarcastic comment. "Like violently or the saucy way?"

"Definitely the second,” he says calmly.

You try to chuckle, but it comes out as a huff.

"I'm sorry, but I can't help it. And today the kissing, the touching... it didn't help the situation. Even if it was for the show, it wasn't just acting for me,” Matthew tells you.

"It wasn't for me either..." your words are soft.

"Seriously?"

Oh shit he heard me.

You nod your head with a shrug.

He sits next to you on the couch. "So we're good?"

"We're good. I suppose,” you say with a dramatic breath.

Matthew smiles softly. You grab his face, pulling it down to yours. His lips return the favor immediately.

"We're not having sex here again though.”

"Oh why not? It was kind of sneaky of us,” he says. “Huge turn on.”

You chuckle and roll your eyes, kissing him again.

sixteen

tags: @pauline5525mgg @theintimatewriter @lilibet261 @greysviolets @jazzymariexoxoc @one-sweet-gubler @thatsonezesty13 @necromaniackat @awhoreforspencerreid @sebs-oxygen @scarredelirium @bts-sugaplum @awesomeness1679 @preciousbabypeter @yazzyu @cynbx @r3idsp3ncer @1010lizz @tiredbut-here @skulzombiw @lena-1895 @eevee0722 @danis-stuff-is-here @kylakins88 @daydreamingqueen1 @regulus-black-223048 @virginmusicloverr36 @inlovewithcharmers <3

[gffa]

I can't follow most of the pro-Jedi blogs since they're pretty much all anti-Anakin and I love him too much to deal with those posts, but I also love the Jedi order so do I check in on your blog and a few others sometimes. I wish the pro-Jedi part of the fandom wasn't so hostile to Anakin and his fans because I really do appreciate the thoughtful pro-Jedi posts. It really baffles me how anyone can hate them. I don't think they're perfect and I don't mind certain critiques, but the people who legit seem them as the real bad guys just make no sense to me.

It sounds like you're in the spot I am with the Jedi--I love Anakin, but I can't follow most Anakin-centric blogs because they're all Jedi "critical" and I love them too much to deal with those posts, even though I love Anakin very much and spend the majority of my time talking about him, and I often wish those blogs weren't so hostile to Jedi fans. That said, this is one of those things where so much of it comes down to personal experience, because for me I don't have trouble finding Anakin-positive spaces within Jedi fandom (within the limited scope of pro-Jedi fandom, which honestly is pretty much just this corner of tumblr in my personal experience, literally everywhere else on the internet seems to be Jedi "critical") I have plenty of space to enjoy all the characters. I get why I'm getting these messages and it's a situation that I think has about a dozen different things going into it (including that I have had my nerves scraped raw by a certain subset of anti-Jedi-fans fandom, it makes it really hard to be sympathetic to Anakin when so many of his fans are polarizing the situation), but that there's not much I can do because, like, I'm a pretty Anakin-positive blog in the way I want to be Anakin-positive. I surround myself with other Anakin-positive blogs in the way that I like being Anakin-positive. I built the corner of fandom that I wanted, because that's the only way it was going to get done, you know? The polarization of fandom isn't just from Jedi fans, it's from all of fandom and I have a lot of sympathy for the feeling of being stuck in the middle of all that polarization. And so this keeps reminding me of how I started out in fandom--can you believe, back in the day, I had less than a dozen total meta posts I could reblog that were positive about the Jedi in a way I could agree with? A. Dozen. Total. I felt so alone, especially as all my Jedi-positive friends that I talked with behind the scenes were leaving fandom because people kept dog-piling their posts to try to make them change or yell at them. I had to work so, so hard to build a Jedi-positive space in fandom (along with others, it was hardly just me! XD), I had to ignore so much shit from people constantly flinging casual little snide remarks my way on my posts or in the tags about me, I had to really focus on what I wanted to create here. And I think that explains a lot about how I run my blog, that I get feeling like nobody likes stuff the way you like stuff, and that the only way to get through that is to roll up my sleeves and start creating the fandom I want. And so I don't think it's that hard to find Jedi content that's pretty positive towards Anakin, my experience is that the opposite is almost impossible, that it's hard to find Anakin-positive content that's also Jedi-positive. But, then, I guess that's where we have to start rolling up our sleeves and making what we want to see in the world!

[system-of-a-feather]

Also a lil more elaboration on this post from the OG guy in the system who talks this shit but it's also important to know when adopting radical self acceptance is that being a fucking idiot and a coward and crap literally has no inherent "oh Im a good or bad or cool or lame" person on it's own

Literally everyone is stupid in their own way and literally everyone has the things they are scared to deal with and face from time to time. I'm a part very dissociated from the concept of fear and my brain converts it fast to other shit, but I do fear letting myself down - both as a part and as a part ofba system - and doing harm by the few I deeply respect; momentarily I am prone to being scared of having my shit taken - trauma crap

That shits literally normal, being scared of shit is literally a completely normal and natural thing across almost all animal species (some argue all). There is no personal judgement attached to literally any feeling on its own.

The difference is whether you can look at that feeling and say "damn I'm scared and that a sucks ass feeling" and actually accept, address and deal with that feeling - or if you are going to deny-deny-deny.

And that isn't to say "Oh you are a stupid coward for wanting to deny it" because again, it is OK to admit you are scared and not ready to deal with something. That takes huge fucking balls to admit. If you aren't ready to deal with it, cool man that's fine, but do take a moment to actually affirm that with yourself - that CURRENTLY in the moment you are not ready to deal with it.

That is not "running away from it like a coward" that is acknowledging the truth of your current state and leaving space for it.

If you can get comfortable admitting that you are too scared to do something right now, you are inherently - in subtext - letting yourself know that 1) you accept that you are scared and it is a real thing about you that you are willing to embrace but also 2) that as much as that is a truth of your current state, that it is just that - a current state.

There literally is no shame or inherent judgement to be found in a feeling alone. Feelings alone don't mean shit. Feelings alone LITERALLY don't mean SHIT. It's how you handle and act in regards to them both internallyvwith yourself and externally with others that determines if you are being cringe (derogatory) or cringe (affectionate) and sorry not sorry, every action you do there will be someone who thinks you are cringe so theres no escaping being cringe WHILE being your authentic self.

Anyways, building radical self acceptance is a hard thing to do so I got mad respects for anyone building it. Most of the system doesn't get it yet either and so I get how hard it is and all.

I actively basically bully and harrass Riku about it 24/7 7 days a week 52 weeks a year for the past 3 years until they get it into their dumb skull. And while I call them a fuckin dumbass, I am pretty proud of how casually and readily they have learned to admit when they are being "a coward" which is easier verbage for them than outright saying "scared" which I'll take.

But honestly, get in touch with your vulnerable "not cool" parts of yourself that you are embarrassed about and just get used to stating it as it is. Those vulnerable and embarrassing aspects are only as embarrassing and insecure as you let them be. If you hide them and try to keep people from seeing it, of course you are going to feel scared to let others see it, of course you are going to feel insecure, and of course you aren't going to be confident when anything relating that comes up out of fear of your insecurity showing.

It's self assassination honestly. Judging your emotions and internal experiences like they mean anything other than a reflection of your current self and what you need us just not productive.

But I digress. Its a complicated and difficult thing to build and work on and itll always be more nuanced and specific to the individual than I can ever chart out in a casual ramble on some of my life philosophies and principles on shit.

So take home message? Try to stop judging your feelings and just, ya know, have them. They may suck but its just how it is in the moment and the moment can always change.

[wetfungi]

Pre-op trans man gets fucked by boss. Focuses more on the build up to fucking and not really the fucking tbh. Trans guy is 20, boss is like 35-40. All genital and terms for body parts are used. No feminization. //

~

Want my boss to pull me into his office for some work shit and see him get a boner from just talking to me. I wanna see him get embarrassed and try his hardest to keep talking while I just listen. Have him stumble over his words while I nod and sit there.

I wanna hear him lock his door while he let's me out. I wanna go about my day like nothing happened cause.. honestly I don't know if what I saw was true.. did my boss really just get horny from talking to me? I wonder if he thinks I didn't see it.

I start to notice I have a lot more shifts with him. He says hi to me a lot more too. Somehow we run into each other a lot more. I'm really intrigued at this point. I purposely search for him to let him know when I plan on taking my breaks and he always starts a conversation when I tell him. He always tells me to have a good break after we've talked for as long as my break should be. It's like he's trying to interact with me as often as possible.

He asks me to stay later one day and offers to drive me home after for the inconvenience. Before we leave the parking lot, he brings up the thing I never thought we'd talk about..

"So.. I think you may have noticed something different at work. You've seen me a lot more huh?" He laughs.

"I just- I want to apologize. I want to say sorry for the time I called you in my office and I- there was a situation. I want to be professional about this. I thought that scheduling you with myself more and trying to talk to you more would get us to a level where it wouldn't be weird, but-"

He turns away from me.

"I'm going to stop scheduling you when I work because.."

I interrupt with "it's okay! Yah know I get things just happen. It's not a big deal. I didn't tell anyone. It's not weird! It's normal. Really we don't have to talk about-"

"I take my job very seriously but everytime I see you, I imagine that day and start to wish I didn't meet you."

I just sit there stunned. "Oh, um.. yeah I- okay"

"I wish I didn't meet you because then I wouldn't have ever gotten the urge to bend you over my desk and fuck you. If I never met you, I wouldn't have to deal with this fight in my head if I should risk it. Should I risk it? You can tell me. Look, I have an uber pulled up right now, I can get you a ride home, no questions asked, no problems. But if you tell me I should risk it... I'll drive you out of this parking lot, I'll drive you home, but that won't be it. So please. Just tell me you understand what I'm saying and let me know."

I don't even know what to say.

"I'm sorry, I can be softer." He looks at me now. "Do you want me to drive you home or would you rather me get you an uber? Either is definitely okay"

I ask him to drive me home.

He smiles and nods. He drives out of the parking lot and starts heading to a hotel. He parks and hands me a keycard and tells me the number to his room. I head to his room while he waits a moment. I just sit on the bed scrolling on my phone and after about 5 minutes, the door opens. He sets his stuff on the dresser, takes off his shoes, untucks his shirt and stands in front of me to take off his belt. I'm staring up at him with doe eyes at this point. I can't believe he's going to fuck me.

"I need you to promise you'll tell me to stop if you want me to stop. I only wanna fuck you if you want this too. Do you wanna continue?"

I nod and say "yes boss" because I think it's funny.

He smiles. "How about 'yes sir' and you'll be my good boy hmm?"

"Yes sir"

"Good boy"

And it starts. He unbuttons his pants. He takes off our shirts. He takes off my binder. He takes off his boxers. His dick is hard in front of my face. I open my mouth and he puts it in. I start sucking him while he plays with my hair, holding my head at all times.

"Be a good boy, lay face down okay?"

I don't even say anything I just eagerly lay back and flip over.

"You have to arch your back, ass up, I need to take off your-"

I move so quick so he sees how desperate I am for him. He gets me completely naked and pushes my ass back onto the bed. He mounts me and I feel bliss like never before. His cock fills me up perfectly. I love the feeling of his thrusts and his cock pumping in and out of me. The way he holds onto my waist and humps into me. The way he encourages me to touch myself while he fucks me. I've never felt this way before.

He flips me over and starts making out with me while his dick is just rubbing against my clit.

We fuck for hours. He cums inside me. We spit into each others mouths. I cum on his cock.

The night ends with him ordering room service and us making plans to fuck again. We talk about kinks and I feel like we've been doing this for years. Like I just feel so good after everything.

I can't wait for the time my boss fucks me again.

[myfriendofmiseryyy]

Fade into you

A Marcus pike x plus sized fem reader fanfic 💜

Content warnings!!!!!!

Mentions of very toxic relationships,mentions of verbal and emotional abuse,mentions of sexual assault and abuse.

3 months earlier:

Rain falls down my face as I stand outside his apartment for the last time,I’m done done with his mind games and constant gaslighting. I call an Uber to pick me up,and take me back “home” my own fucking apartment doesn’t even feel like home anymore every where I look I see all the memories and arguments I’ve had with jake,I can’t even sleep without having vivid nightmares about the last 12 months of our relationship.

I moved half way across the world for him,for it to be thrown back in my face when the abuse started. I should of seen it coming,I was stupid to think someone could actually love me. But at least I’ve got a job now,and I enjoy it. I work for the government,fbi to be exact,how I fucking FBI Agent didn’t see the fact my own boyfriend was abusing me for 4 years is beyond me. I get in the Uber and tell the driver the directions to my apartment,I feel on edge,I don’t trust anyone especially men. He gives me a kind smile and starts driving towards my apartment,sensing I didn’t want to speak,he just turned the radio on. Thank fuck.

I get home and slump on the couch,my now ex boyfriend has sent me multiple messages

11.30 pm

“Please I fucked up,please I love you forgive me”

11.33 pm

“Please baby,I will do anything”

11:45 pm

“Fuck you,worthless slut. You are not worth anything. Your friend is a better fuck anyway”

I block his number and his social media accounts.

One thing about being in the fbi is that I know he is going to pay for what he has done. Maybe after this is all over I will help over people in the same situation as me, help them get their life’s back on track. But first I need to help myself.

My apartment is a mess,my constant state of depression and being at work all the time has really taken its toll,I try my hardest but sometimes all the cleaning gets too much. I do the reminder of the dishes then decide to head to bed,not that I will be getting any sleep. I’m constantly terrified jake will break in,he has done it before. Breaking in to my apartment at the dead of night just to shout abuse at me,but my neighbours know what a scumbag he is,and they have cameras all over the building. “I’m safe” I tell myself.

No way am I sleeping with the lights off though,I do my nighttime routine and then text my co worker Marcus to say that I might be running late tomorrow because I’ve only just gotten back. Honestly,marcus has been suspicious of jake since the the day he burst into the office demanding that he needed to speak to me “right now” ever since then marcus has kinda been protective over me. Marcus and I have become pretty close friends (as close as Jake allowed us to be) and we check in on each other regularly. He has been through some shit the last few months with his ex Teresa,she abandoned him and called off the engagement after she met another guy. Marcus was in bits,I just wish I could of helped him more at the time. But I had to be home at a certain time,Jake set an alarm on his phone for what time I finished work,and if I wasn’t home by then he would go ape shit.

At least now I can hang out with Marcus and other co workers after work without jake breathing down my throat.

———————————————————————————-

3 months later

It’s been 3 months since I broke it off with Jake,my life has taken a turn for the better. I got a restraining order against him and I came clean about what happened to Marcus,he was infuriated and wanted to put the man behind bars. However Jake is (was) a cop and trying to put a cop behind bars is…very tricky,Jake knew all the best lawyers and the case fell through. It’s weird because technically the FBI is above the police but it still felt like Jake had all the power over me. I cried and cried that night. Marcus has Been there for me every step of the way,even down to coming to my apartment at 4am after I call him hysterically crying because I had a nightmare about Jake. He has installed new locks and a ring camera for me so I can see who is at my door,and has even taught me how to defend myself in that sort of situation. We have movie nights often where we take it in turns to pick a movie,I still feel very on edge around physical contact,Marcus acknowledges that and keeps his distance if needed,but honestly I like snuggling into him. He feels safe and I trust him. I often find myself falling asleep in his arms,it’s a reminder that I’m healing. I’m healing from all the shit Jake put me through. Although at the moment I can’t see myself and Marcus being more than good friends,I can’t help myself but like him as more than friends,he is kind,caring,compassionate and not to mention drop dead gorgeous. I think somehow,somewhere,someone put us together. I’m not a religious person,far from it. But I do believe in “soulmates” and I also believe in spirit guides. Maybe this is the way my life is supposed to go. Yeah I’ve been through a lot,to much if I’m honest. But maybe meeting and working with Marcus is the best thing that will ever happen to me,he certainly restored my faith in men.

I’ve been going to therapy for around 3 weeks now,my therapist being a very wise mid to late 50s woman,who has also gone through abuse.she tells me I am very strong and have a heart of gold. And that I need to heal before I get into another relationship. She has told me a lot of methods and books I can read,I’ve read more in the last few weeks than I have in my entire life.

Marcus is interested too,I lent him one of my books and he came to work the next morning with tears in his eyes and said “if this is just a fraction of what you went through then you are the strongest person I’ve ever known” and pulled me into a hug. Marcus is never shy to show his emotions,I like that about him. He is never shy of crying at a movie or a good song,he is never shy of telling me how HE feels. It has come up in conversation once or twice how he “thinks the world of me” and I’m “the most powerful beautiful woman he’s ever met” it normally comes out on the nights I’m crying into his shoulder because I think it’s all my fault. “Darling,one day you will know how it feels to be loved by a proper man,a man who will do anything for you because you deserve everything” he will whisper into my ear,he knows I am not ready for a relationship yet,he actually encourages I heal first,just like he did with Lisbon. But feelings are feelings and we both know that our feelings towards each other are more than platonic at this point. Small touches and eye contact kinda give it away,I just wish I wasn’t so fucked in the head that I could act on those feelings.

Later that day

Marcus comes over for our weekly movie night and we start the night off like we usually do,getting takeout. I’ve started to feel more insecure about eating around Marcus recently because of my feelings for him. I’m a bigger girl and all through out my life I was told I’m “fat” and “shouldn’t be eating that” the take way is ordered and it comes in no time,we get the pizza and sourdough out of the boxes and sit down on the sofa. “You can eat around me ya know,I think your body is beautiful,I don’t care what society thinks” Marcus softly says. “I know…it’s just all through out my life people have told me I shouldn’t eat certain “fatty” foods because I’m already fat enough” I sigh.

“Well fuck them,eat what you fucking want. It’s your life not theirs.” He says softly then chuckles.

“You think I’m beautiful?” I shyly say.

“I know you are” he says and leans in closer to me.

Ya know how I said I love how Marcus speaks his mind? That is what I mean,he isn’t afraid to say something “controversial” he also isn’t afraid to admit something is off with himself or if something is off with me he will be the first person to notice. He’s just so god damn perfect.

I sigh deeply.

“What’s up” he says after finishing his pizza “pizza put you in a food coma?” He chuckles.

“No no,I’m fine! just…thinking”

“Penny for thoughts? Or do you want to be left alone for a bit?”

Prang there goes my heart strings again,god fucking damnit.

“Could we just cuddle for a bit? Could use the grounding?” I say softly.

“Sure thing hunny,come ‘ere” Marcus pats his chest.

We stay cuddled for around half an hour,to be honest I’m far from relaxed I’ve been rehearsing a fucking speech for the past hour,of how I’m going to admit my feelings to Marcus,how I’m going to go about it.

“You sure you ok? You are very quiet today” Marcus strokes my hair gently.

Fuck it I’m gonna tell him,what could possibly go wrong?

“Marcus,can we talk?” I say shyly.

“Yeah of course what’s up hun?” He lifts his head up slightly and pauses the movie on the screen.

I take a deep breath,”this has been bubbling for a while now,but I like you.more than just friends,you make me feel safe,protected…happy again,you’ve help me through the toughest times of my life…you’ve helped me heal. I never thought I would trust anyone with my heart again but you came into my life with your charm and kindness and swept me off my feet. I think I’m ready to take my healing journey to the next step,to be in a relationship again,and I want it to be with you”.

Marcus looks shocked but happy,he puts his finger on my cheek and wipes the tears,”oh darling I’m so proud of you, you already know how much I think of you,how beautiful I think you are. And how I want to spend the rest of my life proving how real love should be. But for you to say those words,I’m so fucking proud of you. I know how much it took for you to say those words,and how much it even took for you to admit you had feelings for someone again. We can take this as slow as you want,your in control here,we will do this at your pace. And I mean everything,sex,kissing,going out in public,everything is your pace I promise”. He holds my face in his hands before pulling me into a hug,I can’t help but breakdown a little. This is the safest I’ve ever felt,in years…maybe even in my life,and it’s all thanks to Marcus.”don’t cry baby,you’ll get me going” Marcus soothes me gently by rubbing my back. “There happy tears,I’ve never felt so happy and safe with anyone” I say wiping my tears.” “Is it ok if I kiss you,I really want to kiss you” “I want you to kiss me Marcus,I’ve dreamt of kissing you for the last 8 months,when I was with Jake, and he would kiss me,I imagined it was you,even though you are nothing like Jake…obviously,I’m rambling just kiss me” I laugh softly. The moment his lips meet mine it is like a million fireworks,his lips are so soft and plump,like they were made for me. They mold into mine so easily,the softness of his lips and the slight roughness of his stuble,it all feels so amazing,it feels natural to kiss him. Like we have been together all along,our skins rubbing against each other as we kiss.

When we finally break the kiss,the look on both our faces is pure bliss,”so your saying…all them years I’ve been in bad relationship after bad relationship you were here all this fuckin time,waiting for me?” I chuckle softly. “That’s how the world works darlin” he laughs and cups my face in his hand “your an amazing kisser,I can’t believe I didn’t kiss you sooner” he chuckles

“You and me both,I wish I found you when I moved over here. Not stayed with that abusive dickhead for another 5 years.” I sigh softly “you make me feel so alive Marcus”

We have a deep chat about how our relationship is going to go for the next 4 hours before heading to bed.

“Can you…sleep with me tonight, I know you normally sleep on the couch but…I want to be close to you” I say shyly.

“Of course hunny,I couldn’t think of anything more perfect” Marcus whispers.

We sleep in each others arms all night.

[aheckinmess]

Coffee Cures [Shinsou] (Fluff)

(One-Shot 14/? in a collection of My Hero Academia one-shots posted regularly on Saturdays - and sometimes Sundays.)

Read on AO3.

Tags: Shinsou x OC, Hitoshi Shinsou, Shinso, Original Female Character(s), Ichijiku Aoki, Shinsou-centric, OC Runs Into Her Best Friend, OC Writes Stories, Coffee Date Because Shinsou is a Cutie, Shinsou is a Little Shit, He Likes to Tease OC, Honestly They Are Disgustingly Adorable, Aizawa is Mentioned, Obviously, Also There's a Cat, Overall Cuteness

Word Count: 1,542 words

Summary: After a long time writing, Shinsou invites Ichijiku with him to the coffee shop to rest and relax. On the way home, they meet an unexpected friend on the street!

Ichijiku (Tigress)

“Hello? Earth to Ichijiku?” Shinsou tugs me out of my manic writing frenzy with his dulcet tones. 

I blink and he’s blurry. One more blink and he comes into focus. Damn. Was I really that out of touch with reality? I turn back to my computer where ten new pages of content look back at me from my word processor.

“How long have I been brain dead?” I grunt, stretching over my chair and popping my back.

“Almost two hours. How the hell did you manage ten pages?” He gapes, looking at the screen as I scroll.

“The characters wouldn’t stop yelling at me.” I whine.

I tilt my head back and he looks down at me with that sleepy smile. When he kisses me, all of the tension in my muscles melts away. Everything feels serene and pleasant.

“You look like you could use a break from all their rambling. Want to come to the coffee shop with me?” His fingers graze my cheek.

“As if that’s a question.”

. . . . .

Winds whistle through buildings and serenade my ears with another story. You’d think stories would stop floating around in my head after two hours of writing, but alas, no such luck.

Not that I mind.

“Do you think it’ll snow today?” Shinsou hums.

“I sure hope so.” I smile. “You know winter is my favorite season.” 

“It’s starting to become my favorite too.” 

“You just like seeing me in sweaters.”

“It’s not just that.” Shinsou huffs, hiding his smile in his scarf. “I also like that it’s cold enough that I can cuddle you everywhere I go.”

“If you’re trying to earn brownie points and make me buy your coffee…it’s working.” I laugh taking his hand and swinging it as a tinkling bell announces our presence in the shop.

“I’m trying to earn brownie points because you’re my girlfriend and I like seeing you smile.” He chuckles.

We step in and he kisses my cheek, making my eyes sparkle up at him. Coming from a family that neglected my need for physical touch makes these little micro-affections that much more meaningful.

“Hi, how can I help you?” A familiar voice asks as the barista turns around. Her eyes brighten. “Ichan!”

“Hana-chan! Hey!” I beam. “How have you been? I didn’t expect to see you here!”

“I’ve been great! I landed this job as a way to make a little extra cash. They pay my bills on the Support Team but you know I like to keep myself busy.” She laughs, making someone’s drink and then calling out the order. “How have you been, Shinsou?”

“Ichan still keeps me around, so life couldn’t be better.” He says casually, leaning his head on mine as he wraps an arm around my shoulders.

“You two are disgustingly adorable.” Hanayuki smiles, stepping behind the register. “What can I get you cuties?”

“A peppermint hot chocolate, please.” I say.

“And a hot coffee with cream and two sugars.”

Once our orders are put in and served, we thank her and head to a quiet space in the corner by the window. I take a sip of my hot chocolate and promptly singe the entire surface area of my tongue.

“A-Ah…” I splutter, swallowing and feeling every hot drop of liquid as it slides down my throat like scalding magma. “I have made a mistake!”

Shinsou’s lips twitch as he fights a smile, taking a sip of his hot coffee like it’s nothing and then setting it down as he raises a challenging eyebrow. Cheeky jerk.

“Don’t look at me in that tone of voice, Mister!” I squeak, swallowing a few times as the heat from my drink slowly dissipates. “Now I’m sad and demand cuddles!” I pout.

“It’s not my fault you can’t handle the heat.” He taunts.

“I mean, there’s a reason winter is my favorite season.” I crinkle my nose at him and stick out my tongue.

“Aw, want me to kiss it and make it better?” He puckers up.

“Gah!” I smack his arm playfully and then hide my face in my hands as I flush.

“Hey, don’t hide that cute blush from me.” Shinsou purrs, combing his fingers through the ends of my hair as he whispers in my ear. “If you hide, I’ll be forced to tickle you.” His hand skirts at my side.

“Don’t you dare!” I squirm, already feeling the tingling sensation even though he barely touches me. “You know how ticklish I…snow!”

All antics disappear as we gaze out the large window. Even though it’s outside, the falling flakes have a way of quieting the daily buzz of background noise. My shoulders slump and a smile settles on my face. Shinsou’s arm comes around my waist and pulls me close. For a while, we just watch and sip at our drinks - of course, I wait until mine will no longer scald my tongue. 

When we’re both finished with our drinks and a thin white blanket covers the street, Shinsou grunts and shuffles to the end of the table.

“Ready, Sunshine?”

“Ready.”

We toss our trash and head out the door when I hear a faint cry. No, a sort of whine? At first, I ignore it, scanning the area as I thread my arm through Shinsou’s as we move along.

Meow! 

“Do you hear that?” I gasp, turning and looking around for a little bundle of fur.

“Hm? Hear what?” Shinsou asks, but his eyes light up when the sound gets louder. “A cat?”

“A kitten! We have to find it.”

I scour a set of nearby bushes, but there’s nothing of note. Shinsou looks around the dumpsters near the coffee shop.

“Psst, over here, Sunshine!” He calls out, crouching down near the dumpster. “Hey there, buddy. Come on out. We won’t hurt you.”

I’m slow and methodic in my movements as I end up crouched at the other side of the dumpster. A tuxedo kitten pinballs between Shinsou and I, peeking out at one before crawling to peek out at the other. 

Trying to coax the little kitten out, I imitate the sound of a chirping mom cat, extending my hand low to the ground. Shinsou continues using his soothing voice to our advantage as well.

I don’t know how long we both crouch out by the dumpster trying to coax the kitten over when a familiar, droning voice interrupts us.

“What are you two troublemakers up to?”

“Oh, hey, Mr. Aizawa. Didn’t expect to see you here.” Shinsou responds, his attention quickly distracted by the sight of his old mentor. “There’s a kitten behind the dumpster. We were just convincing it to come out.”

“Mm. You might do that easier with a little cat food.”

The sound of rustling grocery bags tickle my ears as I edge closer and closer towards the little tuxedo. Eventually, I plant my bottom in the freezing snow and patiently hold out my hand.

A moment later Shinsou hands me a tin of wet cat food. I sit the open can beside me, watching the tuxedo venture closer at the promise of food. All three of us barely move a muscle as he creeps over to us, eyes wide as he debates whether or not to trust us.

Finally, he’s there. The sound of moist munching breaks the quiet of the falling snow and I slowly reach out to pet him. He snaps his head to me and I pause, but he lets me touch him when he turns back to the food.

“There you go, cutie. You must be freezing cold. We’ll find you someplace warm to stay, lil buddy.” I coo, feeling warm as he starts relaxing around me with every stroke of his fur.

When he finishes off the can, I scoop him up into my arms before he can run away, and squirm until I get my feet under me to stand.

“Look at ‘im, Hitoshiii.” I step closer to him and let him get in a few head pats before turning to Aizawa. “Would you like to pet him, Mr. Aizawa?”

Our expressionless teacher seems less than thrilled with the little animal, but if we learned anything from our time at UA, we know he’s got a soft spot. For his students and cats alike. So I’m not surprised when he scratches the little guy behind his ear and he starts purring.

“Aww, he likes you.” I giggle.

“I’ve already got four, I don’t need another.” Aizawa drones.

My eyes immediately find Shinsou and I put on my biggest pair of kitten eyes, holding the little tuxedo beside my face to soften him even more.

“No.”

“Pleeeasseee, Hitoshi-kun?” I plead. “At least let’s take him for now while it’s cold?”

“What will Fauna have to say on the matter?”

“You and I both know he’s small enough that she’ll treat him like her own.” 

I don’t miss Aizawa hiding a smirk in his scarf as Shinsou sighs, pretending like he doesn’t want the kitten just as much as I do.

“...fine.”

“Yes!” 

In the following weeks when I’ve got a cold and a sinus infection, I still don’t regret it. Especially when I find the little tuxedo - Kakure - napping with Shinsou, cuddled up on his chest.

Want More Shinsou? Try: Wash Away the Storm

[tectco]

Hello, just wanna start this off by saying that I love your art. I've decided to ask my favourite artists for art tips as I wanna get into it, but no matter what I do it never looks right. So, any tips?

WARNING YOU JUST OPENED THE FLOOD GATES GET READY FOR A LONG ASS POST

WOOOOO BOY, first off huge fucking compliment i honestly didn't think i was anyone's favorite artist (despite what my friends say) and i find it super cool of you to try and draw

Anddd nowww the cowards will run out as soon as you read more

okay so first things first, disclaimer! I AM NO PROFESSIONAL BY ANY STANDARDS, IM JUST SUPER INTERESTED IN ART, DO NOT TAKE MY WORDS AS GOSPEL AND YOU DO NOT NEED TO TAKE MY WORDS OF ADVICE (you didnt say i was but just to cover my ass)

I am still learning as an artist so this will just be advice that helped me, lets just hope i can remember what got me here, and this will be just me jotting down my thoughts as they come so maybe im not the best person to come to about this (i may repeat what other people say in terms of art so bare with me)

SO WITHOUT ANYMORE DISCLAIMER! YOU WANT ART TIPS FROM ME? WELL GET READY FOR SOME BULLSHIT FROM A PERSON WHO'S BEEN SO ARTSY FARTSY IN THEIR ENTIRE LIFE AND HAS NO IDEA WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT, WELL COME INTO THE SHIT TRAIN!!

Now i dont know if you are an intermediate artist, beginner, need help in specific areas or whatever the hell else but! here's the three main points i always wanted to scream at artists who are just starting out!

Your art WILL look like shit in the beginning

References and inspiration are YOUR FRIEND

DONT be afraid to trace

(I know I know this feels like regurgitated and it probably is BUT HEY STICK WITH ME)

does your art looks fucking trash? THATS GOOD!! KEEP DRAWING!! My art looked fucking ugly when i started and some might say (me) it still does, but thats okay!! You learn more and more from just drawing without any tips, art is a pure skill that builds up, do not be discouraged!! The point of art isn't to be the greatest in the world, it's to be at peace with what you create so if your art looks good to you and you are in a happy place in your progress, you are basically successful in my eyes at least (this doesn't mean to quit learning obviously but it'll come in time, be patient, do not push yourself! that's how you stop loving art and we don't want that happening!)

Ever find yourself asking "man why the fuck does (include art shit here) not look accurate??" well here's a tip, USE REFERENCES! DO NOT BE LIKE ME WHERE YOU JUST WING IT OR ELSE YOU'LL BE CRYING OVER YOUR DRAWING TABLET LIKE I DID AT SOME POINT!! Pay attention to the shapes of the reference, break it down and draw over it if you need to, shapes are very important in art and you need to be able to draw whatever you want in the most basic forms (im no good example of this, i really need to practice more aughhh). As well as references, inspiration is KEY!!! Everything is inspired off each other, nothing is original, so steal from your favorite artists!! Look at their speedpaints, look at how they use colors, analyze how they draw anatomy in their style, see how they use shapes, etc etc, learn from who you consider are the "greats of their times"!! USE ALL THE INSPIRATION YOU HAVE AT YOUR FINGERTIPS!!LITERALLY COPY THEM IF YOU WANT EVEN IF YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY DID THAT, YOU'LL LEARN WITH TIME!! just whatever you do, don't compare yourself so heavily against other artists, i know its hard, i do it myself even! If there is an artist who has a style you so so want, don't crumble if you can't draw in their style perfectly, you'll never win against someone in their art style. I suggest taking inspiration from multiple artists and mashing them together until it looks good in your eyes!!

That actually leads me to my next point! TRACING IS OKAY!! Now obviously I do not mean directly tracing over like some lines, showing it off/posting it and calling it completely original. I mean tracing over the references i mentioned before, or like what i said before, i believe you should actually trace from your favs! (don't call it original like i said before), tracing can help build memory on how to draw certain things like how i took a photo of my hands before, traced them, and then put it to the side to redraw it, making me understand futher how hands work! OR like how i traced a piece of art that i liked to understand how the artist drew their bodies, tracing is used by total professionals in the industry so do not be afraid!! You have total permission from me to trace my art and learn how to draw my wack ass bodies

and for a little extra bit, little bit of a hot take (I'm actually not sure how much of a hot take this is), i don't think you HAVE to learn the fundamentals to get into art. NOW BEFORE YOU RUN OFF SCREAMING AND SHITTING, IM NOT SAYING YOU DON'T NEED THE FUNDAMENTALS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!! I'm just saying that if you want to get into art as a complete hobbyist and just want to draw to yknow draw and be happy, you should just go for it! Again don't make art something you hate! I completely encourage learning the fundamentals but don't ever feel like you're failing just because you don't, get into it when you have the time! be patient with yourself, this goes for any hobby/skill but just sink some time into it, i promise you will get further in you hobby than if you push and rush yourself into complete burn out

OH AND HERES MY ULTIMATE TIP! THERE IS NO WRONG WAY TO DO ART!!

Uhhh i think that's everything? Im not exactly sure how comprehensible this is or how the spelling is since i am not beta reading this! But apologies if this wasn't what you were looking for! (if anybody even read this far) and i hope that if you asked your other favorite artists they answered with anything better than whatever this is! I wish you alot of luck in your art journey and thank you for giving me an excuse to talk about art! OH AND REMEMBER TO TAKE BREAKS

[paralyze-fic]

Paralyze.

Chapter 17

We all started to run back to the bus, but Pixie Bob made the earth shake and shift, making us all fall down the cliff. My fall wasn't as hard as I thought but the rest was groaning and rubbing their bodies in pain. Mineta took off running with his hand on his crotch, and I remembered him saying something about having to go to the bathroom.

But a loud roar made us tense. A big beast appeared in front of the tiny grape boy. Koda ran up to it yelling, but it didn't work, the animal wasn't obeying his words.

Then Izuku said something about them being made out of dirt, so I scoffed loudly. Great for me.

"Oi, asshole." I turned to look at Bakugou, who was staring at me with a frown on his face. "You can use me."

Blink... blink... blink blink blink.

Nosebleed.

"Shit," I turned my head away from him at the misinterpretation of his words. That sounded too sexy, fuck, I have issues.

"Huh? What the fuck are you on about?" Bakugou dragged me to him and charged at one of the dirt beasts. "Use me!"

After I swallowed my spit, I kept my eyes on his left arm, activating my quirk and stopping his muscles, then enhanced my own arm.

This was going to be a hard task.

//////

Slowly, panting and worn out, we all walked towards where we could see the building we were staying in. Mandalay, Pixie Bob and Aizawa were here... also that little kid again. The grumpy look on his face reminded me of someone.

I wonder who... my eyes moved to my right, where Bakugou was walking and I snickered at my own thought. He looked at me with an annoyed face.

"How can you laugh? Aren't you tired?" I sighed and my shoulders dropped.

"I'm so tired I'm about to die, but I still have my humour, Bakuboy." He growled at me and walked faster.

"Don't call me that, shithead."

A growl of my own resonated inside my chest, how dare he? He's the one giving us all shitty nicknames.

"What do you mean three?!" I heard somebody exclaim, most likely recalling the woman's words.

"That's the time it would have taken us. I'm sorry." Mandalay explained.

"So you just wanted to show off how good you are? That's mean." Sato replied.

"I'm hungry! I'm dying!" And now Kirishima yelled still sitting on the ground.

"But honestly, we thought it would take you all longer. You didn't have as many problems with my dirt beasts. Especially... you five over there." Pixie Bob pointed at us five; Iida, Midoriya, Bakugou, Todoroki and I. "You could attack thanks to your experience?" Pixie Bob licked her lips. She jumped at us pursing her lips and yelling something about how she was going to wait for us to graduate to marry us. I slowly backed away from her, and Izuku was gonna say something related to age, but the blonde woman rested her paw on his face, threateningly saying 'What about it?'

That was when Izuku mentioned the little boy standing beside Mandalay, who introduced him to us.

"Oh, he's my cousin's son. Come on, Kota. Greet them. You'll be with them for a week." Well, Izuku walked up to him introducing himself, but Kota punched his balls.

The sight made me flinch and instinctively, hide my dick with my hands. "That hurts..." I mumbled to myself, as Iida ran up to poor Midoriya who had gone a pale white colour, and yelled at Kota.

"Midoriya-kun! Savage kid! How dare you do that to Midoriya's scrotum?!" Iida's voice made me stiff a chuckle and I decided to walk up to the poor male in pain to help him. I used to my advantage Bakugou's yelling at Todoroki, because he wouldn't have let me go.

"You okay, Izuku? Let me help you." I picked him up bridal style and he curled up against me, whimpering in pain. "Let's get you an ice pack, alright?" He nodded and kept his eyes closed shut, hiding on my chest.

"Eh?! Where did that fucker go?! (L/N)! Get back here, bitch!" I growled at Bakugou's screaming and glanced at him over my shoulder.

"I'm not your dog, hedgehog! I can go wherever I want!" He turned to stare at me, and I swear, I saw fire in his eyes. He was stomping towards us, but I just kept on walking. "I'm gonna be with Izuku for a while, go with Eijiro or someone else." I went inside the building, and set Izuku down on a nearby couch, stepping off to get an ice pack.

While looking for it, my mind was racing. Thinking back to lots of moments I had spent with Katsuki.

I have to distance myself a bit, otherwise, I would end up really hurt.

I grabbed the ice pack once I found it closed the fridge, walked out of the kitchen and made my way to Izuku, he was still in pain as I handed him the ice and everybody started walking inside.

It has been a while since I've talked to the boy so I thought I could take this opportunity to do it. I sat down by his side.

"How've you been Deku? We haven't talked in a while." He chuckled and let the ice rest on his crotch.

"I've been fine, and if we didn't talk was because of Kacchan," I laugh with a nod.

We talked for a while, and I also told him about all those fights I've had against Bakugou, he seemed surprised to hear that every time we fought, I won.

"I'm surprised that he still talks to you, usually he hates those who win against him," I sweatdropped at his statement and looked down.

"He tells me he hates me at least twice a day, though, so I guess he does." The smile on my face was a fake one, I was hurt at the mere thought of Bakugou hating me. Izuku seemed nervous and tried to fix what he said.

"No, that's not what I..." he stopped and relaxed after some seconds in silence, and I looked at him. "He seems comfortable around you, and since you two met he had been yelling less at me and also seemed less angry." My cheeks heated up a bit.

"He seems the same to me," he chuckled and shrugged.

"Well, I've known him since we were kids, so I noticed the change in his behaviour." Izuku looked at me in the eyes and smiled brightly at me, "Thank you, (M/n), for being a good friend to Kacchan."

//////

Now, after we ate dinner, here we were.

All the boys were at the hot springs, and I was freaking out.

Why! Can't I just take a normal shower and go to bed?! I don't want to be there, in that pool, naked, with everybody around me! I'm shy!

My eyes were staring down at the cold floor underneath my feet, hearing everyone chatting and walking to the hot water. At the moment, my mind wasn't functioning properly.

"(M/n)-kun, are you okay?" Izuku's voice made me flinch and stare at him, only for me to cover half my face and look away. He's so close.

"Uh- eh, no, actually I..." I hunched over my body by my waist, making my voice groggy, "I feel a bit nauseous, maybe it was something I ate. I'll go to sleep early." I turned around, ready to leave, when I felt a hand on my back, rubbing it softly.

"Really? You want me to take you to the room?" Frantically, I shook my head and moved my hand away to smile reassuringly at him.

"I can go on my own, you go and enjoy the hot spring." He seemed unsure but nodded nonetheless.

"Call me if you need something," I hummed an affirmative 'huh uh' and walked out.

The very moment the door closed behind me, my body leaned on the wall beside it, a relieved sigh leaving my lips.

I'll have to bathe at some point, right? Just not now, and not with all the boys here.

With that thought, I walked to the big bedroom all the boys were sharing, changed into my sleeping wear and plumped down on my futon, closing my eyes and drifting off into a deep slumber.