#hitting post on this and going 2 sleep
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
i like fade dreams to have a twinge of horror—it’s a dreamlike, subconscious version of what a demon drawn to the worst parts of you thinks you want—and what i think would be insane is if tristan’s fade dream was that he and fergus had entirely switched places, making him the elder brother, the heir, the non-mage, oriana’s husband, and oren’s father. for best results bryce should also be king so in a weird way he’s stealing alistair’s place as well and so it’s a real mirror image of alistair seeing himself have a normal family
#i love. writing characters who are fundamentally envious#like catnip to me.#i think it would activate his least favourite parts of himself in a way that pleases me#tristan cousland#hitting post on this and going 2 sleep
48 notes
·
View notes
Text
to moving forward
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#gojo satoru#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itadori yuuji#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#satoru gojo#jjk manga spoilers#hina.comic#before any1 says anything i KNOw his birthday is in december ik ik ik this is just 2 show some post-battle bonding after the trauma#its winter in canon n megumi's birthday has passed and he spent it being piloted like a mech so they need to celebrate Now!!#also this was technically a request lmao anon wanted megumi birthday angst hehehehhe i hope u like it <3 bc it KILLED ME DEAD#im going to collapse remember when i said this wasnt harder than the hydrangeas im having second thoughts#page 8 made me want to bash my head in#could have stuck with one flashback image could have left them monochrome could have done literally anything 2 ease the workload#but noooo the chronic overachiever in me would not allow it#rule of threes i had to include all of them and they Had to be in colour it wouldn't have hit the same if i had kept it monochrome#i needed it to look how childhood memories look i needed it to look oversaturated and hazy and fond but unmistakably Gone#it may have killed me but im so proud of this rn like from an art style perspective these megumis and yuujis r top tier by my standards#personal favourites r the first and last panel of crying megumi like not 2 pat myself on th back but expression?????? hello??????#enjoy your cake megumi you've earned it <333 sorry fr hurting ur feelings it will happen again#oh my god i can sleep tonight bless <333 and i met my 3 day deadline NICE im so good at what i do
12K notes
·
View notes
Photo
HYUNJIN x ESQUIRE KOREA
#stray kids#createskz#bystay#staysource#dancerachasource#hwang hyunjin#hyunjin#*mary#*edit#only reason i edited these was 1. i saw carlys text post. 2. i spent 5 hours helping my niece do her homework#and i needed to do something that required less than 2 braincells before going to sleep.#my one and only chill activity of my only free day in the week :) live love laugh or whatever i guess. gnight#*hits#*hyunjin#*mary:hyunjin
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
INTERRUPTED (Parts I & II)
A short two-part comic (total of 20 pages + 8 extras) by me! (for me lol)
Fandoms: Ninja Showdown (Randy Cunningham 9th Grade Ninja x Xiaolin Showdown)
Ship: My Immortal Soul (First Ninja x Chase Young)
A comic where nothing really happens! But it contains a lot of half-naked men. So like, kids avert your eyes and adults don’t open it at work or whatever. ¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯
thanks for checking it out <3
#ninja showdown#my immortal soul#first ninja x chase young#first ninja#rc9gn first ninja#chase young#rc9gn#xiaolin showdown#randy cunningham 9th grade ninja#long post#i mean sorta! just be aware if you accidently click read more#CACKLING HOLLERING FUCK YE IM DONE WITH MY SHITTY SELF INDULGENT COMIC now i wanna slurp some coffee&sleep#this is for me myself and I and like 11 people who i seduced into this ship. hope you all enjoy this meal boos <3#my goal is to make at least one other person to go awooga about at least ONE image here ;3 hope someone can enjoy the bois#fun fact! In second week of me drawing this we got hit by an earthquake at like 1am so strong our building wobbled for like solid minute+#&aftershocks (which is a lot for my region) and I legit for a second expected that the last thing I ever drew would be Chase's tiddies lol#fun fact 2! i planned to finish this much earlier but i got hit with a killer migrain and than decided fuck it we postponning til 14th#it will make it ~thematic~. sorta. i guess? romance is only implied in this ship lol there is more tension here
317 notes
·
View notes
Text
aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i havnt drawn in a little
#I 4GOT CISSIES EARRIGG BG S#HITS TVSLE AAAAAAAAAA IM 2 LAZY 2 GO BACK IM SRRY GORLIE :(((#just a kint of konbart as a treat 4 me ig#4every piercing kon has; the more pronouns she attains#if i explained my thought process whenever i draw kon it would just be hehehehehehheehheheheheehe#heart glasseess!!!! i need 2 find more fun glasses shapes 2 draw her in tbh tbh#i did light shading & my head starts hurting godAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#i havent been on ib like a while & theres sm posts omg yummy im looking @ all my moots & kickin my feet omgg tehe#i need 2 try 2 sleep get rid of this headache b4 i continue 2 stare @ my screen tho….. i prolly wont i wanna talk im tired of bing sad LMAO#more kart 2 day ((literally prolly tmr))#ive been thinking about aus sm this is so its so woahhhh#kon el#kart#puppee art#GAAAAHHHHHH I WANNA EXPLAIN MY STUPID HCS 4 Y I DRAW KON LIKE THISSS#i dont bc im 80% sure ill b ripped apart but like i love talking about them i love talking about kon sm#@ least i do 2 my doggie
77 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
44 notes
·
View notes
Text
ok. migi & dali opening. i am going to talk about it now.
throughout the opening we see so many Things. the entire series up until the second to last episode, i hadn't paid that close attention to it because god that song is a banger and honestly i was more focused on the music than the animation, despite being captivated by it every episode. but that episode for some reason. i paid more attention that time and had some Realizations.
one question i've had every single time the opening has played has been "why does one of them take the cherry pie and the other does not?" throughout the opening the two of them are seen doing the same things, effectively mirroring each other, which makes sense considering it was most of the plot for the first few episodes, so i really didn't think about it too much. but with that pattern established, it's extremely strange when, at the end, one of them strays from the shared course of action to take one of the slices of cherry pie that's sitting on the chairs.
another thing i noticed when i actually paid attention was that the one in the shadows in all their activities is always dali.
and if that's not enough, we have this shot of migi and dali as sun and moon respectively, and i think we all have enough media literacy to understand the implications of that.
then we have this shot of them, showing migi floating higher and dali sinking lower.
all of these screenshots to say that the opening animation tells us exactly what the series, or at least the part that the anime currently covers, is about at its core. we see it in the series time and time again as these two try to make their way through the world.
migi is portrayed in the series as somewhat childish, frequently to a fault - generally more hopeful in what he believes, which shows in his actions and the way he interacts with others in a genuine way. dali is severe and bitter, much more driven by the idea of getting revenge for their mother, seemingly just for the sake of it at this point, and being willing to do it at any cost because he doesn't value anything other than his brother.
migi sees the good in things and, while still helping dali with their shared goal, is genuinely enjoying his life with this family and in this town. dali, on the other hand, is dedicating everything he has to their goal, not caring or bothering to invest any part of himself into anything else. (this is portrayed also by migi being in the light, enjoying the activities he's doing, and dali being in the shadows, spending all his time trying to solve their mystery.)
this conflict of priority between them results in the fight they have in episode 9. a showdown between hope and despair, over a bike in a river, all as a result of migi's off-comment about wanting to eat cherry pie again.
and now the bike. they state this explicitly in the dialogue, but it's the first gift migi has ever gotten. so when dali throws it in, he does not hesitate even a little bit to jump in and get it. the bike is meaningless to dali - just another thing to toss and discard for the sake of moving forward. he gives up on everything so easily because he never bothered getting attached in the first place. he's so quickly ready to abandon anything and everything aside from migi. there's no way that he can be happy like that and migi knows that. migi is all he has and they both know that.
the jealousy he expresses is just jealousy that migi is able to find happiness and value in things other than him while he's unable to do the same, as a result of his bitterness and his fixation on finding their mother's killer. he's jealous that migi is growing closer to other people and making connections that are important enough to him that he's not willing to just throw them away with the toss of a bike.
so he takes his brother down. he forces his head underwater, and asks if he's still thinking about that cherry pie (THIS LINE IS SO FUCKING GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!). he tries to drag migi down with him into his own despair, tries to convince migi that his beloved cherry pie isn't really all that important. that it's not worth as much as migi's acting like it is.
he tries to literally beat the hope out of migi. he is so desperate to be hopeless that he beats the shit out of his brother over and over about it.
but, of course, that would never be enough to stop him.
and we're back to the cherry pie. dali finally caves and agrees to go back and try to sort things out, not because it's what he thinks is best for their safety, but because it's what migi wants for his happiness. he realizes that he'll only continue to hurt migi if he pushes his own cynicism on him and forces him to leave everything behind, since he had the guts to get attached. even though dali doesn't really understand the value of the cherry pie, he sees how much it matters to his brother. he sees his resolve to experience those small moments of happiness again.
the cherry pie is taken from migi's side of the shot.
throughout the entire story, migi has been the one to see the value in the simple things, like taking walks with the dog, having friends to hang out with and do wacky bird shit with, riding a bike, and eating cherry pie together. he is not afraid to experience joy and is willing to fight for it, for both him and his brother, even if his brother doesn't see the value in it quite yet.
migi will see the good in things. he will have hope for the future. and he will take the cherry pie.
#migi & dali#migi to dali#migi and dali#felt like such a dork writing that last section#BUT I LOVE THIS SHOW AND THE THINGS IT SAYS TO U#I LOVE U THEMES AND MESSAGES#me: i should go to sleep#my brain: u should write up a tumblr analysis post abt this anime opening and the significance of its shots in relation to the series theme#me: ok#the way i hit the image limit and had to get rid of some#ARE U STILL THINKING ABOUT THAT CHERRY PIE IS SUCH A GOOD LINE U GUYS#could prob write a whole nother post abt dalis reluctance to let himself get attached to things#and his at any cost mindset and how it hurts migi thruout the series#but.#might get a little too personal xo so maybe i wont#I LOVE U HOPE VS DESPAIR THEMES#ok anyway#god#this took me 2 hrs to type up and gather screenshots for#ANYWAY TIME TO GO TO SLEEP#ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ#meta
62 notes
·
View notes
Text
...because any moment may be our last. everything is more beautiful because we're doomed.
#looking through my drafts and seeing this post unfinished and knowing in my core I'll probably never actually finish it .#but strangley enough i don't hate the way it looks with only those 2 panels ? beauty in simplicity or something idk#woe unfinished post be upon ye#honestly probably wouldnt even bother posting it were it not for the fact i was hit by a sudden wave of sadness#by being reminded out of the blue that alex really does just . lose nigel that night#enough deep level analysis my brain is all out i think . but just the simple fact that nigel dies that night#and alex has to go on for the rest of his life post-ending carrying that grief and loss with him#i know we talk about how nigel isn't truly 'gone' in the sense that they're one now and jack is supposed to be an amalgamation of the two#a product of their union and 'consummation' that night at the yard#but he's still gone . no matter how much alex might try and follow in nigel's footsteps#no matter how hard alex tries to tread that same path nigel did to feel close to him#he's gone . they will never have that moment beneath the house ever again . and alex has to go on living with that#anyway . normal again . imagine dropping a song rec like i used to. aha . go listen to sick like me by in this moment.#like minds#murderous intent#nigel colbie#alex forbes#nigel colbie x alex forbes#edit : THEY'LL NEVER HAVE THE MOMENT UNDER THE HOUSE AGAIN !!!!!#thinking about the moment where nigel sits across from alex after he shoots john#and the contrast to the scene in the crawlspace . nigel is trying to connect he is trying to get alex to see to understand#but now alex is closed off. something may be irreparable broken between them#do you think it was the moment where nigel starts to despair . to plead . realise that he needs to find a way to make alex truly see#i need to get some sleep
28 notes
·
View notes
Text
fanfic friday: aftg edition
Mug Diplomacy by DragonCat223 (@dragoncat223)
Summary: Jean is using mugs the way the Chinese government uses pandas, but Jean has something the Chinese Government does not: A sense of humor. Aka 2100 words of Kevin being the dramatic bitch he was born to be, followed by 1200 words of Jeremy being confused.
Tags: post tsc, Post-Canon, Fluff, i think, Kevin being dramatic, but that’s not new, Jean is enjoying his ceramics class, Minor spoilers for tsc, Jeremy desperately wants to solve the mystery of the disappearing mugs, no beta we die like men, NOW WITH EDITS
Words: 3,453 Chapters: 2/2
y'all this is the shit i live for. you had neil josten being a little shit? well turn your eyes to Jean Moreau, Little Shit Extraordinaire. also kevin is a Dramatic Bitch in this as well so really it's just amazing. anyways, jean gets into mug-making and kevin gets jealous, bless his dramatic little heart <3 (also the summary didn't make sense to me but the chinese government features a lot less in this fic than the summary implies)
check out the writer's tumblr and ao3 (both linked above) <3
#this really hit the post tsc fluff spot#fanfic friday#fanfic friday: aftg edition#aftg#all for the game#nora sakavic#andreil in the background#andreil#kevin day#jean moreau#jeremy knox#andrew minyard#betsy dobson#neil josten#david wymack#abby winfield#catalina alvarez#if any people read all my tags:#currently it is july 10 2024. you are seeing this 2 months in the future.#i have made 10 posts like this today to prepare for the future and i am tired. but also i got to read a lot of aftg fics <3#college app season has begun! this may possibly be my last post for many months#idk where im going with this#idk just like if you see this jan 2025 (or after) and i havent posted for months#please interact with me as a reminder to come back. idk just like spam ask me or smth.#and if future me ever sees these tags: good luck bitch. get some fucking sleep.
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
me: this is too much exposition. you should not directly tell all the time. let dialogue and tone/body language descriptions do some of the work
also me: this isn't exposition it's literally the second paragraph of chapter one you're setting up the plot you gotta drop a little exposition
also also me:
#I go back and forth back and forth back and forth and then I do zero actual writing and it's bed time 🙃#I need to STOP fucking myself up but I can't. I used to trust myself. at least a little. when I'd write.#like I never approached it with a big ego. I was always sick to my stomach when I'd hit 'post' on ao3.#I was always like IS this good though?#but now I can't even get a rough draft out without sabotaging myself which is 🙃🙃🙃🙃#I don't know where this extreme self doubt came from. It's been plaguing me for over a year.#I abandoned 2 massive major wips in the last year that I had poured WEEKS into. FILLED notebooks.#and my self doubt consumed me and I was like I cannot do this. scratched out the notebooks.#deleted the word docs entirely#now I KNOW I have one that's good. I KNOW it is. I KNOW this cause I've thought up the WHOLE fic. all the way to the end#and I wanna read it so bad#and that's how I know like. I got a live one on the line baby#I just. freak out. and quit. and that's not me. I don't know why this is happening.#but it's really discouraging and tough#and I just wish I could drag myself outta this weird self doubt spiral#and write this damn fic cause I KNOW I CAN. or at least I COULD. a year ago? this would already be written#all like 9-10 chapter of it. it'd be done and up and I'd be like ha I did it!#now I'm fucked.#I'm now done venting for the night I give up sleep meds time 🤷♀️
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
i headcanon that lake likes warmth but they don't naturally produce much body heat on their own
so sometimes jesse will wear a jacket for a couple minutes to warm it up before giving it to them to wear
#eliot posts#intr#infinity train#infinity train book 2#jesse cosay#lake infinity train#jesslake#queerplatonic jesslake#my parents' house used to get HELLA COLD on winter mornings#so the trick was to get your outfit ready and when the alarm rang‚ hit the snooze button‚ grab the clothes#and pull them under the covers with you while you go back to sleep for 10 minutes#so they'd be warmed up from body heat when it was time to ACTUALLY get ready#bc otherwise you'd have to put on freezing cold jeans on a winter morning and that was just the WORST#i have no reasoning to back up the first part of this headcanon#for all i know lake could be strangely warm like kez canonically is
136 notes
·
View notes
Text
Why am I so tired again I want to be able to do things but im just napping the day away again…
#i know bad sleep schedule i went to sleep at 4 yesteryesterday which hits hard now and then 2 am yesterday and oh yeah makes complete sense#I’ve talked myself out of complaining. I was also earlier like brain why are you not like allowing me to talk with people but no if im tired#then it makes sense to not allow the most energy expensive thing#this is a post i made#okay then im going back to bed hope I get to game and do homework but understandable if not
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Wow this sucks
#I’m literally gonna cry wtf#I’ve been trying to get back into writing so I was going through some old journals and reading the poems I wrote back in 2015#and I left my favorite pages sitting on top of my notebook on my bed and my family’s dog came in while I wasn’t looking and destroyed it all#like they’re completely gone#some of the few pieces of writing from my teenage years that I’m actually proud of and wanted to revisit and it’s completely destroyed#I’ve found 2 scraps and they’ve got about 4 words in total#this was multiple pages full of writing#this is so discouraging I don’t even want to write anything now#like I started taking an online poetry workshop last week trying to push myself out of my comfort zone and maybe possibly move in the#direction of trying to get some of my poems put out there#and I’ve been in a huge writing slump for the last like year#and I was hoping this might get me out of it but now I don’t have any motivation to do it#I just wanna cry#I can’t go back to being a teenager again I can’t rewrite the way I felt back then#and now it’s really gone forever#I’m so sick and im working 3 jobs and I just want to be creative again but I’m tired#and I’m about to get hit by this giant hurricane#I’m really overwhelmed I think this was just the straw that broke the camels back#brb gonna go cry myself to sleep over lost poetry#sorry this is me venting feel free to ignore this#vent post#will probably delete after I’ve gotten more than 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
did you guys know that Lovely Gate 3 ...For Egg Quarters
#listening to my sonic music playlist now#ohhfuck yes back 2 back came on right after i hit the post button. sonic rush soundtrack is so good#i was about to turn the music off and go to sleep but the werehog battle theme just came on .#and naturally i have to listen to that one all the way through
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
not to be emo on main but i miss when my birthday meant something to me :/
#and holidays & events in general :/#idk when it started but i just. stopped seeing them as special days or whatever they’re just another day on the calendar#now i may not know when but i think i know why: depression 🥴#but still i miss like. not being able to sleep the entire WEEK leading up to my birthday#but in recent years it’s just been me waking up. going ‘oh okay’. wishing a happy birthday to 2 of my best friends w/ the same birthday#and then i go about my normal shut-in routine. it’s just. augh.#it’s not like i’d rather go out and have a big thing because no i enjoy my introvertedness#and i like having an excuse to spend a day that way but. it just makes me sad to see how it just doesn’t affect me anymore :/#this ain’t even about milestone birthdays i haven’t even hit the last one yet i’ve been like this since i was like 15 😭#grace being stupid#text post#personal
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Jealousy is so evil evil
#its been 2 minutes since pmdd hit#WHATEVER#lasar being incoherent#pmdd posting#or yk#i could go to sleep
5 notes
·
View notes