#his lack of fear over what will happen takes me back to when he confessed that he’s more scared of living than of dying | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

devilfic · 2 months ago

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❝right place, right time❞

X. we don't fight fair.

parts: previously plot: you and bruce talk some more about your arrangement. everyone wants to know what's going on with you two. pairing: battinson!bruce wayne x gn!reader. cw: surgeon!reader, secret identities, slow burn, angst is back baby, but so are the romcom plot beats, somebody get gordon a drink and get one for me too. words: 7.6k. a/n: LOTS of plot this chapter, but also some maybe cute things coming later. in between the horrors :D

It takes more coaxing than you would like for Bruce to let you leave alone two days later. Even with proof of a patient, he insists he send you in his car, with his driver and his guards. One of the cops on your detail had confessed they were feeling redundant, leisurely as they were anyway, parked outside General with coffees barely keeping hot in the November chill, “Just the one today, right doc?”

You snuggle deeper into your coat, hands eagerly grasping at the warmers in your pockets, “Just the one. If everything goes smoothly, I’ll be out before lunch.”

“Well, we’ll be here. Holding down the fort.” The two of them snicker to themselves. Glancing to the side, you see Bruce’s men: one in the driver’s seat of his car and the other waiting by the entrance for you. Unlike your detail, they dared not crack a smile for fear of looking too cheerful. You wouldn’t admit it out loud (because these cops were being paid to keep you alive), but you felt like your life was in much better hands with people who weren’t currently goofing around on the hood of their car.

“Right. Thanks, fellas.” You can’t be bothered to sound sincere, and from their general lack of acknowledgement, they don’t seem to care.

You spin on your heels, preparing to follow Bruce’s guard into the hospital, but nearly crash into a woman walking behind you. The collision has you stumbling and jumping back, Bruce’s guard jumping forward, and the woman baring her teeth at you in a… smile?

Her teeth glint bleach-white off the gathering snow, a few shades lighter than the hair smoothly pinned at her crown. Unlike everyone else shuffling past on the icy sidewalk, she is perfectly content with standing right in front of you under the porte-cochère. You supposed the black, mink coat wrapped around her person kept her all warm and toasty. You felt jealous. Then you felt like you should apologize for ramming into her, but nothing came out.

“Apologies, I didn’t mean to scare you,” The extravagant woman speaks first, glancing over her shoulder at the guard who now looms between the two of you, prepared to defend if need be, “Oh! Hello, pleasure to meet you.” She reaches a hand out to the guard and when he doesn’t go to take it, she snatches his hand up from his side in a firm handshake.

You’re more forthcoming with your hand when she turns to you, though you’re not at all sure why she’s bothering to introduce herself. Anyone else would’ve moved on by now. And flipped you off while they were at it.

“Ma’am, is there a problem here?” One of the cops pipes up from behind you, eyes fixed on the woman.

Her smile grows wider, “Not at all, officer. I just thought this all looked so… curious.” She gestures between the cop car and Bruce’s car with one French-tipped finger, “You wouldn’t happen to be a celebrity doctor, would you? Plumping up the pillow-faces of our city’s darling socialites, perhaps?”

You try to scoot around the woman, but she moves with you, keeping perfect eye contact with you the whole time, “I’m real sorry, but I need to get going. I have an appointment-“

“With Bruce Wayne?”

You flinch. The woman looks… familiar, now that you’re looking at her more closely. Her name escapes you. “Excuse me?”

“Bruce Wayne. That’s his car- well, one of them anyway. A source of mine says it’s the same one from two days ago when you both arrived together for… something. And the same one from a few weeks ago; if I recall, Mr. Wayne made a generous donation—a whole wing!—to Gotham General earlier this month. And now you’ve been spotted using his car. What’s that all about?”

The same cop from before flanks your side, locking you in with Bruce’s guard and this mysterious woman, “Lady, they’re busy. I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.”

“I only want to ask a few questions.”

“And they don’t have to answer. If you keep this up, I’m gonna write you up for harassment.”

She looked like she’d been waiting to hear that. She reaches within the folds of her coat and pulls out a badge, brandishing an ID for the cop to read, “Whatever happened to freedom of the press?”

You peer at the ID yourself, at the impeccably styled photograph of the same woman with the same blonde hair falling in loose, Hollywood curls that frame her smile. Beside her photo is her name: Vicki Vale. You suddenly remember where you’d seen her before.

Vicki knows you know, too. You try to sidestep her for the door but she crowds in on you, barreling through the arms that attempt to hold her back, “Are you Mr. Wayne’s doctor? Is he sick? Is he dying?”

Your lip curls back in a snarl, “What ever happened to HIPAA?”

That amuses her. “Is he in the car right now? Is that why you’ve got all this security? Is Bruce Wayne paying for your protection after you were taken hostage a few weeks ago?”

The cop grabs Vicki by the upper arm, managing to wrangle her away from you, but she only pivots to the car, tapping her nails on the tinted windows and calling out for Bruce to comment. You almost feel sorry for her, in the way you might feel sorry for a rabid dog walking in circles on a busy street.

You feel a hand on your back and Bruce’s guard ushers you quickly into the hospital, even as Vicki shouts after you for clarification on Bruce’s whereabouts. His expression, as always, is flat.

When you’re far enough away from the lobby, you ask, “Does that kind of thing happen to… him a lot?”

The guard doesn’t bother to pause in his stride, doesn’t even bother to look down at you as he answers, “Yes.”

You supposed if you had to deal with people like Vicki Vale all your life, you’d become a recluse too.

At the very least, you hadn’t said anything damning. She would have nothing to go off of with whatever soundbite she managed to grab from you, and God save her editor when they’d inevitably have to cut out her getting threatened by a cop.

She’d been waiting for you, though. How she knew you’d be here, at this time, meant she’d either been tailing you or she had someone on her payroll doing it for her. The thought makes your stomach churn.

Bruce had been in your office twice, but you had never been in his.

It was bigger, obviously; it’s two floors below the penthouse with a receptionist outside and some hallways leading to God knows where. The receptionist—Jennifer, who insists you call her Jenny—is very forthcoming with refreshments as you wait outside for Bruce’s meeting to finish. You decide there’s no better time than now to pick apart the marble floors and TVs on the wall replaying WE’s corporate reel.

The lobby downstairs was modern, clearly remodeled, but Bruce’s office and penthouse were comparatively frozen in time. You could almost picture the first Waynes walking through here all those years ago. Everything—from the luxurious leather chair you were sitting on, to the warm low light, to the gentle clicking of Jenny’s fingers on the keyboard, to the empty glass of sparkling water she’d given you had almost made you forget that you were currently living in the penthouse upstairs.

The door to Bruce’s office opens, breaking you out of your contemplation. A man in a fine suit walks out, chatting with Bruce, though you couldn’t see the latter from where you were sitting. You can only catch the last half of their conversation: something about an auction?

You don’t have much time to think on it. Jenny quickly rises from her desk and slips into Bruce’s office, and a few seconds later comes out to invite you in.

You don’t see Bruce at first. The room is just as big as you imagined. Bruce’s desk is right across from the doors, backlit by large windows letting in the noonday light. It’s a heavy, wooden thing that is far bigger than it really has any business being with next to nothing actually on it. And, notably, he is not sitting at it.

It takes you a second to spot him to your left at a built-in bar, washing out a glass of what looked like dark liquor down the drain. It isn’t until Jenny shuts the door behind you that he looks over at you, setting the empty glass on the counter.

Today, he’d forgone a sweater for a white button-up with the sleeves rolled to the elbows. You noted the healed over cuts and scars on his arms and wondered if people asked about them the way you had, enchanted (rather than perplexed) by stories of martial arts hobbies with no concerns for where he went at night. He watches you thinking about it, but before you can ask, he speaks first, “So, you met Vicki.”

Your shoulders slump just at the mention of her. Bruce catches it and a smile, however small, warms up his expression. “Unfortunately.”

“Bet she made an impression.”

You cross the room in a few strides, undoing your coat and throwing it over a nearby chair, “She’s tactless. She said her source recognized your car and now she wants to know what we are to each other,” You pause in your ranting when you see him pour a bit of brandy into the glass next to him, “Is that for me?”

He casually hands it to you, “You look like you need it.”

You don’t have the marbles to take offense to that at the moment. You knock back the shot in one go, then go to pour yourself another one as Bruce watches you. After you throw back the second one, you realize that he hasn’t responded to you. “Weren’t you listening? I said she’s following us.”

“Plenty of reporters are, she’s not special.”

“Wh- sorry, what?”

Bruce shrugs, “Vicki Vale isn’t the only reporter in Gotham who knows what cars I drive, who I go to lunch with, or where I put my money.”

“Isn’t that…” You start to ask, but the way Bruce is looking at you makes you feel like your perfectly reasonable question has a perfectly obvious answer already, “…isn’t that bad?”

“Not when I know what cars they drive. I know who works for them. When I don't want to be seen, I’m not seen. They don’t have that luxury.”

“You keep tabs on all of them?”

You watch Bruce lean against the bar to face you, one hand in the pocket of his- okay, whoa. Either his thighs were getting bigger or his pants were getting tighter. You don’t remember his other suits being this… formfitting. You can’t help but notice how they stretch as he reclines, and though your eyes flick back up to his before he can catch you, he makes no mention of it… even if his eyes narrow some. He waits until he’s sure he has your undivided attention, “I like to be informed. Especially since we’re selling a narrative, now.”

“A narrative.” After a moment, it clicks in your mind. “That we’re together. The narrative we never agreed on selling.”

Bruce brushes right past that, “So what’d you tell Vicki?”

You pour yourself a third shot, though it’s a bit more modest. You cap off his brandy and move away from the bar as if it would silence the siren song of day-drinking, “I told her that asking if you're dying is a HIPAA violation.” Bruce's mouth twitches as if containing a laugh. "What?"

You watch him contemplate telling you, and then, as if he suddenly thinks better of it, he shakes his head. “You just reminded me. If we do agree to do this, I will have to fire you. Patient ethics."

“Which is another reason why we probably shouldn’t do it.”

His head tilts, “Probably?”

You flush. You sip on your drink, folding your other arm around your waist as he questions you with his eyes, “I just… I’m frustrated. I hate this. I hate that the safest choice here is to hide away while you take care of it. It’s not that I don’t trust you to do it, I just don’t want to run away.”

Bruce watches you in that way of his, calculating and assessing. “Going in alone is running away too. You’d be Isaac bound at the altar.”

“And you, Abraham? Delivering me to a cruel god?” A rush of exasperation sours his expression. “I’d be stopping him. It’s me he wants.”

“And what about your parents? Your friends? Judith? You’d be fine leaving them to bury you?”

“Of course I’m not- of course not.”

“Then you don’t have to do it. Trust me.”

“I do trust…” You stare at him for a moment, “I trust you. I have to. But you get that this is weird, right? Getting together for the press? Putting all eyes on us? You get why this feels weird for me, don’t you?” Bruce is quiet, holding your gaze steady. You know that this plan wasn’t his first choice, and yet he didn’t look nearly as put off by it as you were. Perhaps it was another way you two differed. Something else to chalk up to being so rich that things like this- maneuvers like this become necessary. “Why do you want to do it?”

He pushes himself off the bar, taking a step and then another until he’s squarely in front of you. You have to squeeze your hands into fists to tamp down the immediate flight response you feel being this close to him, seeing this almost unguarded side to him. It was different from the deer-in-headlights deal he had when you first met: open, but unsure. It rocks you that he doesn’t look so unsure anymore. You swallow and keep his gaze, but it feels like a lot more work for you than it is for him.

“You said you don’t want to hide, and I don’t want to make you. We need a good reason for me to stick by your side. This is a solution.”

“You don’t need to stick by me. I’ve got a detail, remember?”

“I don’t trust two cops to keep you safe.”

“Your guards, then. You’ve got more than enough to do the job for you.”

Something in Bruce’s eyes flicker, “Maybe I want it to be me.”

Your courage slips. Your lips part, sounding out words you can’t bring yourself to say. What do you say to that?

He wants it to be him. He wants to be the one to keep you safe.

Logically, you know he’s right. GCPD’s finest couldn’t hold a candle to his strength and dexterity. They couldn’t even keep him out of their servers. And his guards were better, but they were still fallible. A gunshot or a stab wound would take them out just as easily as it would anyone else. The man before you had survived both of those things and more.

Uncanny warmth unfurls your fists. It curls around your rib cage, through each bone, around each lung, worming its way up your throat and unspooling in your mind. You feel warm all over. It is a terribly strange feeling to have for Bruce Wayne, but you’re having it all the same.

If he was still just Batman to you, you might’ve done something you couldn’t easily take back.

You suddenly wish for the times when that was the case, when blindfolds were commonplace, so you wouldn’t have to look him in the eye or think through how one might have gone through with those thoughts, if one had the chance- “As far as reasons go,” you struggle around the lump in your throat, “That’s not the worst.”

Bruce smiles.

He skirts around you and heads for the desk as you watch him go, the scent of him finally permeating past your defenses. He didn’t smell like green apple today—more sandalwood or pine—and as you debate on the specific notes, he comes back to you with a flier in hand. It takes your scent-drunk mind a minute to read it.

Gotham City Food Bank presents: The Thanksgiving Bachelor Auction!

You stare. Bruce is still holding the flier out to you, expecting a reaction. You can’t really think of one. “Uh.”

“I’d like you to come.”

“Why…?”

“The food bank puts together Thanksgiving baskets every year for the needy: turkeys, tofu, yams, stuffing, the works. They do a charity event to raise money to stuff the baskets. It’s for a good cause.”

“That’s awesome. What does this have to do- oh, fuck.”

Bruce raises his eyebrows. You recall what the man from earlier mentioned about an “auction”. You snatch the flier away to look at the finer details. It would be this weekend, there were six bachelors planned (including Bruce), and each person was encouraged to bid big for charity. Dinner would be provided. It sounded nice.

“You can bring Dr. Madison,” Bruce offers, “I think she likes me.”

She does. She painfully does. You could imagine her emptying this month's and last month's paycheck on a date with Bruce. Taking him to the nicest (and least vandalized) sushi joint in the city, engaging him with tales of the kids she's saved and her love of Broadway. Pampering him with praises for his charity work, admiring him openly and easily, charming him the way she charmed him at General.

She is a charming, sweet, beautiful woman. Bruce would look very good with her, even for charity. You wonder what things would've been like had he broken into her apartment instead of yours.

“Just wait 'til she finds out you personally invited her," you force a laugh, "She's going to have to take out a loan."

"I didn't know you were planning to bid on me, too." He's joking. Obviously, he's joking, if the barely restrained smile is anything to go by.

"In your dreams, maybe." Bruce shrugs. "But... I thought we were creating a narrative. Letting someone else buy you for a night isn't very romantic." You hate how hesitant you sound, like the idea of it displeased you. You don’t mean to sound that way, of course. It's just that if anyone were going to go on a date with Bruce... shouldn't it be you?

“The dates are just for fun. You'd be my real date.” His real date. God. “It would make you look like a good sport." He sees you mulling it over, still unsure. He folds the flier into his pocket. "Or not. We don't have to tell them anything yet. I wouldn't want to make it awkward for Dr. Madison if-“

If what? If she found out you were "dating" Bruce days after telling her to her face that you didn't know his relationship status? God forbid she rub it in your face after you spent so long being indifferent about him. “It's fine. We'll come. But maybe hold off on calling me your real date until you’ve fired me. Officially. You know.”

“I'll have my people talk to your people.”

You feel queasy at the smile he gives you, so casual and reassuring. You could really use a lie-down right about now. “Okay. Well. I’ll see you at home.”

Bruce blinks, but you’re already heading for the doors of his office before you've realized what you just called his place. You hear a quiet “see you” from behind, but you don’t dare to look back.

“Please don’t agitate the inmates. We are liable for anything that happens to you on the premises, but if you go poking around where you shouldn’t, that’s on you.”

The corrections officer hands you a clip-on badge with your name on it, but when she goes to ask Batman for his ID, she hesitates.

“He’s with me.” Detective Gordon assures her from his other side. The officer’s eyes narrow. James raises an eyebrow, “I talked to the warden about it. If you’d like to bring it up with him.”

That seems to be all the convincing she needs. She passes James his badge and gestures for you three to continue on down toward the visitation room.

It had been a hassle getting Bruce through the metal detectors, and it had been distraction enough that it didn’t weigh on you just who you were going to see until you were already in the room.

It was wide, with vending machines and a couple of tables scattered about, barred windows allowing a look into the unusually sunny afternoon outside. A handful of inmates were already there: some visiting family, others meeting with lawyers. It made it easy to spot him. Lucien was the only one alone, and from the looks of him, he was more happy to see you than you were to see him.

As you three walk over, he stands from the table, grinning ear-to-ear. You barely remembered his face from when you were younger, save for the same patchy beard that had yet to fill in after all these years. He greets Bruce first, holding out a hand, “Wow. You know, I’ve never seen you up close before. Kinda glad about that.”

Bruce does not shake his hand. Lucien’s smile is unwavering. His eyes slide past yours to meet the detective’s, and James shakes his hand out of pity.

It isn’t until you and James sit down that Lucien finally looks at you dead on. “You look good.” You feel your stomach lurch. It didn’t feel good to hear, especially when he looked at you like freshly caught prey. When you make no move to reply to that, he shrugs, “I almost didn’t recognize you. I hear you’re a doctor now. Really worked your way up from gutter trash, huh?”

Your expression hardens and he snickers.

James cuts in for you, “Mr. Goulding, we requested a visit because we think you might be able to help us with an ongoing case you were involved in. Can you tell us what you remember about Dimitri Young?”

Lucien’s eyes slither back to James, “Not much. Kid wasn’t with us long. He was… skinny. Cried easy. Up Nat’s ass all the time.”

“Were you close with Ms. Young?”

“Yeah, yeah. You could say that. We worked with each other. Ran the trade for a while with a couple other kids. Got a lot of customer service experience back then. She was… nice. Shame what happened.”

James raises an eyebrow, “Seems like you were on good terms. And after Natalie was killed, did you keep up with Dimitri? Visit him at Arkham, maybe? Write him letters?”

Lucien glances at you. “Well… it was tricky. Thanks to the good doctor and friends, I had to steer clear of the whole thing for a while. Felt bad for the kid, though. When I heard about the plea deal… I’d have taken life here over Arkham. I don’t care how fucked up the kid got over Nat’s death. What they’re doing down there?” He looks over at James and grimaces, “That’s the real criminal shit.”

You remembered that. His lawyer had pleaded insanity under the guise he’d get parole on good behavior, gain sympathy for having lost his only family so brutally. You remembered what Bruce said too; he’d been good. He was doing good until he saw you.

James gears up to ask another question but Lucien cuts him off, “Are they gonna talk or are they just decoration?” He points his finger at you and Bruce who hovers over your shoulder.

You wring your hands underneath the table, feeling Bruce’s eyes burning into the back of your skull. The truth was that you had a list of questions to ask him. You’d stayed up all night writing them down, rehearsing them.

Now, you could only remember Natalie and the barrel of her gun.

Lucien was there, too. He was on the frays of the memory as he always was. The shootout had yielded successes and failures, and Lucien, who’d been there that night—who laughed as Alex laughed and laughed harder when the bullet nestled itself into the meat of her brain—had not been found for years after that. You thought sometimes that you saw him on the street, but his appearance in your memory was just as frayed.

It all comes back to you now that you’re sitting in front of him. The everyman, a person meant to blend into the crowd. It didn’t surprise you that he’d managed to stay out of here for so long.

“…You don’t have to if you’re not ready.” James’ voice floats in between your musing, making you aware of his and Lucien’s eyes on you. Lucien is still smiling, strands of golden hair slipping out of the small bun at the back of his head.

“Why did you stay with the Vipers for so long?”

Your question surprises him, like he hadn’t expected you to have a voice after all these years, “I was open to new opportunities. But they paid well and you’re almost guaranteed a good position if you don’t get gunned down before 18. I was running my own little unit of teenyboopers before I got locked up.”

You frown. How casual he is describing it all. “They didn’t toss you aside as soon as you got too old to control?”

“No, no. That was your friend’s big issue, wasn’t it? Scared to be controlled. Nah. The boss man liked me. You know they like ‘em young, easy to impress upon and all that. They want the lifelong loyalty. I’ve never been that devoted, you know? But I liked the money.”

“Do you know what happened to Dimitri?” This question, Bruce asks. For the first time, you see Lucien’s smile dim some.

Lucien clears his throat, “No. Kid kick the bucket?”

“He broke out with some inmates not too long ago. He’s on the street hunting down people related to Nat’s case.”

Lucien looks from Bruce to you, then breaks out into a fit of hysterical giggles. The sound is grating to your ears. “Holy shit. He wants to kill you.”

“He’s killed one person already,” James stresses, trying to save you the humiliation. “We need to know if you think he could be working with the Vipers again. We believe someone is supplying him with… venom.”

“Venom? Fuck me. That’s expensive, especially those newfangled strains they had on the street when I was out. Can really fuck you up if you’re not careful.”

“Did the Vipers have their hands on that kind of stuff? You were a lieutenant after all.”

“Maybe. Not as much as they did drops. That was all the rage. Venom’s too volatile and, like I said, it can really fuck you up,” Lucien exhales hard through his nose. “If Dimitri’s on that, he’s not gonna last. Especially if the Vipers are giving it to him.”

You frown, “Why especially?”

“I mean, come on. Same reason you and your friend beat the shit out of him all those years ago,” You flinch at the memory. “He was weak and nobody gave a shit about him except Nat. My guess is the kid probably went back to ‘em for help, and they saw an opportunity to make him a lab rat.” You feel Bruce shift behind you as his cape brushes what little of your arm you were allowed to leave exposed here. Lucien’s eyes drift up Bruce’s body, sparkling with some new recollection, “And with Mr. Vengeance on the streets, I imagine juicing your best men up with venom oughtta make a nice challenge.”

Lucien watches as you process what he'd realized instantly. Behind the feigned impassivity, some little bit of him seems to find this just as awful as you do. Even if it's just pity, a shake of the head as foresight grants him the knowledge that what comes next will undoubtedly be a tragedy.

It had to have been Dimitri’s first time on venom when he attacked Russo, and as uncoordinated as he was, he had put up a fight against Bruce. You couldn’t imagine what he’d be like if he got better at it. If he got more of it. And he would, if the Vipers had any sense. You knew they didn't give a shit about you, or Russo, or Alex, or Dimitri. They were just hoping that his rage would make a casualty out of the Batman.

He was going to kill himself for the chance. And the Vipers wouldn't care. They would leave his doped up, bloated carcass in the street like they had left Nat.

You realize that you aren't breathing when you feel a cool hand on your upper back, closing around your scruff and sending a jolt of awareness through you. You almost think that it's Dimitri—having crawled out of your racing thoughts and come to take you once and for all—before realizing that it was Bruce, hovering so close now that his cape brushed your shoulders. His leather-clad thumb brushes against the nape of your neck, and when you look up to see him looking down at you, you catch him imploring you for something. Urging you to get out of your head.

Looking at him reminds you to breathe. You take one deep breath in, holding his gaze, and turn back to Lucien.

When you do, he looks different now. His eyes linger on Bruce’s hand. When you ask him your next question, he doesn’t seem to delight in the drama of it anymore, “After Dimitri was put away, what did the Vipers do?”

Lucien stares at you, then past you. His tone is solemn after a few moments of silence, “It was business as usual. They packed up what they could, moved to their other safe-houses in the city, relocated and reallocated. They talked about… the kid costing more than he was worth. Handful of us pitched in and got Nat a grave. I’ve been a few times. Not recently. It was nice.”

“Where?”

His eyes narrow at you, “Why do you give a shit? You feel guilty? Wanna leave some flowers for the dearly departed?”

You feel your lower lip wobble and you curse the feelings burning inside you. You were trying so hard to keep it together. “Do you think any of the Vipers would bother to tell him?”

He stares at you for a minute. Someone new walks into your peripheral view. It’s one of the correctional officers warning you about time. Something soft coats Lucien’s voice then, "She's in St. Agatha’s cemetery, near the treeline. The name on the marker is Adelpha Lions. We couldn't bury her as Natalie.”

Adelpha Lions. St. Agatha's. You think about bringing her flowers, but the thought leaves a terrible taste in your mouth.

The officer from before comes back to escort the three of you out, and Lucien doesn't bother to acknowledge her or James thanking him for his time. He only watches you, leveling you with a look of such contempt that you feel your chest hollow out, breath stolen again. He watches you well until the door to the visitation room swings shut.

Bruce and James walk ahead of you, though you notice that Bruce lags behind, glancing back at you every once in a while to make sure you're keeping up. James mentions something about keeping an eye on the cemetery, just in case Dimitri does know about it, and it leaves the same terrible taste in your mouth from before.

You know you ought to say something, but you find yourself drifting after them, mind elsewhere, stuck on the way Lucien looked at you. It was like a switch flipped when he saw Bruce touch you.

Why had he touched you? So blatantly, so intimately? He had to have known how that would look. Could it have been that he didn't care? Or, that he cared more about you?

You peek at Bruce’s profile as you walk; the cold lights above you both make the black of his cowl stand out, but they also make the blue of his eyes that much more piercing when they suddenly zero in on you. Your name is called. You look to the side and see James staring at you, expecting, worried almost, “You good back there?”

“Sorry. What?”

“I said I’d like to talk to you.”

“Oh. Sure.”

“Alone. If you don't mind.”

You look at Bruce. His eyes have focused on James now, searching for what he might want to talk about. You wished you could read minds. You decide it couldn't hurt to ask, “Can I ask what about?”

“Just some... questions. We haven't had the chance to really speak since the night you were attacked. I'd like to follow up with you." You bristle when you realize he expects Bruce to fully leave. James notices, glancing between you and Bruce. "I’ll drop you back at Wayne Tower, since your detail says that’s where you’re staying now.” When you don't make a move to confirm, he sighs, jerking his thumb toward the exit, "...I'll let you two talk."

You watch him walk toward the parking garage, just as Bruce crowds up against you, dropping his voice to a whisper, "He wants to know about me."

"Yeah, no shit. What do I say to him?"

"I told him I'd look into Bruce Wayne to keep him off my trail. There's not much I can do since you told him what you saw." You can hear the irritation bleed through his words. "As far as he knows, Bruce Wayne could be a suspect and you could be in danger."

You curse under your breath, "So I need to clear your name."

"What exactly did you tell him the night you were attacked? Exactly."

"I... I said that I had reason to believe... uh, confidential information was leaked to Bruce."

"Did you tell him exactly what the information was?"

"No."

"Did you tell him where you saw it?"

"No. Just that I knew you knew something you shouldn't. But he knows I had no proof."

Bruce goes quiet. You see him looking off to the side, eyes flicking to and from as he thinks about what to say next. Each second feels like a minute, and you keep watch over the direction James went for fear he'd come looking for you after too long.

You feel Bruce's hand take your upper arm and he brings you closer, tucking you away from the security cameras overhead and into him instead, "Can you lie?"

"You want me to lie to a detective?"

"We don't have a lot of options here. Can you lie?"

You frown, biting into your bottom lip to ground yourself. The pain focuses you some, "What do you want me to say?"

It's your luck that James is patient. A few minutes later, you find him propped up against the trunk of his car, hands in his pockets as he waits patiently for you and Bruce. Bruce gives you both a single nod before heading off to his own car, leaving you alone with the detective and the world of questions he could be gearing up to ask you.

But before you prepare yourself for the first one, James walks around to the driver's side door, flashing you a playful look, “You ever seen the Bat Signal up close?”

The answer was obviously no, but now that it was right in front of you, you wanted nothing more than to see it turned on. You'd seen it light up the cloudy night sky a million times it felt like, and it never failed to take your breath away. It's far too sunny out to see it now. As the chilly breeze tries to sneak under your clothes, you turn to watch the sunlight glint off the skyscrapers, enjoying the little bit snowy Gotham afforded this late in the year.

The city’s still loud from this high up, but it’s different. Kind of like how it felt watching the city from the penthouse. Up here, it felt secluded. Private. Perhaps that’s why James picked it. He kicks the base of the floodlight with his shoe and it barely tremors, “Was a hell of a time trying to get this thing up here. Chief's still coming around to it.”

You think about the burner phone in your pocket. Bruce’s relationship with the rest of the GCPD was… strained at best, but he and James seemed close; you wondered just how deep their relationship went, exactly. Apparently, not deep enough to tell him who he was.

His voice catches your attention just then. “You living with Wayne, now? How'd that happen?"

You breath out a heavy sigh, “I uh… yeah. He offered. After the whole thing with Dimitri. Just until he’s caught.”

“That’s awfully generous.” You don’t respond to that, so he presses more. "Did he offer or did he...?"

"He offered. No coercion." That wasn't entirely the truth, but you had no room for nuance right now.

“Do you feel safe with him?”

“I do.”

“You seemed worried when we first talked about him. You said he had your file.”

“I... I said that I thought he had access to it. Because of something he said."

James’ eyes narrow at you, watching you with his head tilted. “What'd he say to you?"

"He just mentioned something about the... the case. I told him where I grew up and it jogged a memory."

"Is that so?"

You cursed how apathetic James could make himself look. You had no clue if this was working on him, only that you had to follow through with this, seams tight, no loopholes. "He heard about the shooting. His butler, Alfred, he's always been really protective of Bruce. Everyone knew the Vipers snatched kids with no one to check on them, I think he just wanted Bruce to stay safe. Make sure he didn't make the wrong decision if he went out and got himself in trouble. Like I did."

"So, you told Wayne where you grew up, he brought up the shooting, it triggered something in you. You assumed he knew about your file and you felt threatened. That's why you went to the Bat."

"Yeah."

"And now... nothing?" James raises an eyebrow, gesturing to the empty air. "It's all good now?"

It wouldn't be a good story if it was all good. You twist away from James, leaning against a nearby pillar, "Not exactly. I don't know if he really knows or not, it just felt like a scary coincidence. You know? But I told Batman and he said he'd look into it. I trust him above all else."

"You seemed so sure the night I interviewed you."

"I was looking for patterns."

James hums. "The Bat seems to really like you."

That a was a shift. You perk up a bit. “What do you mean?”

“He speaks highly of you. Says I can trust you like I trust him. If you say you feel safe for now, I trust you." Your skin prickles with flattery. "There's just something that's not quite making sense to me."

“Oh?”

"When I looked into your file, nothing looked out of place. GCPD keeps a log of who accesses a file, and from what I could tell, it hadn’t been touched in years. It looked fine… at first.”

Had this been a few days ago, this information would have shook you to your core. It still does, but for an entirely different reason now.

“I’m—admittedly—not great with computers. Normally, I’d ask the guys down in IT about this kind of thing, but seeing as… anyone could be involved, I had my daughter take a look at it. She-“

“Your daughter?”

James pauses. You were no cop, but that didn’t sound particularly legal. Then again, you didn’t have much room to speak. “She… she showed me the metadata, beyond just the stuff we usually see up front, and she found something. The database logs who accesses what because poking around files you have no business looking at can get your badge taken. Needless to say, she found more than a few things wrong.”

“Oh?” This time, your “oh” sounds decidedly more nervous.

“The name and badge number of the last person to access your file was scrubbed from the frontend, but it was still available on the backend. It was an officer, Paul Brown. When I pulled him aside to ask why he needed your file, he claimed he didn’t know anything about it or you. He seemed to be telling the truth, but doing some further digging, I found a trail of cases he’d been accessing over the past two years. Cases related to certain notable figures in the city.”

Notable figures. Like Bruce? Was there more he hadn’t told you?

"I found a connection between those cases and some recent movement from the Penguin. Turned out the guy was a mole feeding intel to Cobblepot. And not just him. I was checking the files he accessed against a timeline of events, and I have reason to believe he’s been feeding a couple of politicians the same need-to-know information. Politicians like Daniel Roberts.”

“Councilman Roberts.” You feel your blood pressure rise as James nods, “Detective, I don’t mean to be rude, but should I even be hearing about this? This sounds serious, way too serious for me-“

“You were there that night at the party Wayne threw, and so was Roberts.”

“Well, yes, but that doesn’t mean anything. There were tons of politicians there who support the mayor. Bruce is interested in politics. Doesn’t mean he’s in bed with them.”

Your defense seems to intrigue James. He rests an arm on the floodlight, “Did the two seem chummy at the party?”

“They didn’t really… talk. I mean, he intervened when I got into an argument with Roberts, but-“

“An argument about what?”

You could kick yourself. It was like this man had a skill for drawing the truth out of you. “It was stupid. He said some stuff about Batman and it got me riled up. Bruce put out the fire.”

“Roberts is the most vocal anti-vigilante member on the city council. Now I know he's connected to a dirty cop, and that he's in Bruce Wayne's circle. Doesn't that seem a little strange to you?”

You swallow, “What exactly are these questions leading to, detective?”

James moves away from the floodlight, approaching you slowly, cautiously, as if he expected you to take flight the second he got too close. “You told me that night that you knew Wayne had information about you he shouldn't have. I found the thread, I pulled it, and now I find Wayne at the center all over again. I'm looking for patterns, too. So, I'm going to ask you again," You watch him reach into his pocket and pull out his phone, flipping the screen to you. In big, bold text, it reads, "NOD IF WE'RE BEING RECORDED" "Are you sure you're safe?"

You should win an Emmy for how you school your expression into one of complete nothingness. All the while in your head, you are cursing the very bed Bruce was conceived upon. You curse him for leaving you here to explain all this, but most of all, you wish you’d kept his bottle of brandy.

You shake your head. James blinks. "I'm sure." You watch him exhale heavily, shoving his phone back into his pocket. "I'm telling you what I believe, detective. I believe I was wrong about Bruce Wayne."

"Maybe. But maybe there's more out there I still need to find."

"You're a good detective, James. Thank you for caring so much. If you can't trust me, trust Batman. If there's something to find, he'll find it."

You can see the slight shake in James’ shoulders. You wonder if he’s starting to freeze up here. You reach into your pocket and hand him one of your warmers, and though he recoils when you first hold out your hand, he thinks about it for a moment, then takes it. "You and the Bat..." He starts, rubbing his thumb against the heat pack in his hand. "He tell you who he is?"

You dodge the question as stealthily as you can, "Did he tell you?"

James considers your question, stern-faced and shivering, “No. But I have my theories." After a moment, he side-eyes you. "You didn't answer my question."

"It's... not for me to say."

He's not satisfied, and you didn’t expect him to be, but he looks too tired to argue now. He runs a hand along his face and looks out onto the city horizon. Under his breath, you hear him whisper, “Yeah. I figured.”

"He trusts you a lot, you know. For the record. I can see why."

You watch him reach into the pocket of his coat and pull out a lighter and cigarette, bringing it to his lips to take a long, deep drag. He holds one out to you, but you shake your head. You'd never been one for smoking (you'd seen the effect it had on the insides), but you could envy the temporary peace on James' face as he blows out a cloud of smoke. "Not a lot of that to spare these days."

a/n: this was a bitch to write with a headache

#bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne scenarios #bruce wayne fic #bruce wayne #batman x reader #batman scenarios #batman fic #the batman #battinson x reader #battinson #dc #mjwrites #bw; rprt

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strwberrytae · 1 month ago

Text

Beyond Desire | 05

→ pairing: taehyung x reader → rating: 18+ only - m for mature - sexual and graphic content → genre: drama / romance → words: 9.9k → disclaimer/trigger warning: this is a piece of fiction based off of the fifty shades of grey series. this is not a parody. there are mentions of strong dominant and submissive lifestyles based on research and personal experience. there are also various psychological issues that are addressed throughout the series; including anxiety, self-destruction, blood, bruises, panic attacks, childhood abuse, non-consensual sexual acts and self-harm. this is a work of fiction and not to be taken as a promotion of the series, fifty shades of grey. this is an original piece of work. edit is created by me. enjoy! feedback is greatly appreciated.

→ a/n: thank you everyone for their patience! so much! I started this series years ago with the intent to continue it. life and lack of motivation got in the way, but it's made it's way back into fruition! this was frantically edited multiple times, though there still may be some errors. I hope you enjoy!

→ chapters: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 [series in progress - must read previous chapters]

→ summary: it’s never easy falling for your best friend when you have so much history. it’s especially difficult when you both share the same sexual desires and lifestyle. taehyung is a dominant CEO of a well known company in Seoul and you are an up and coming editor. while both of you come from a troubled and dark past, you lean on each other for support and comfort. what happens as your feelings blossom and grow over the years? what happens when you fear Taehyung may be falling in love with someone else? will you confess your feelings or remain in the shadows?

The next morning, Joon Jae awoke at 6am as you realized he did every morning for work. You laid in his bed, so tired but awake. Your restless mind forbade you to sleep peacefully throughout the night. It was unclear how you felt, truly. Such an interesting feeling.

All you knew is that you were stuck with the familiar dread of emptiness that you had experienced many times before. It felt as if you became a vessel overnight yet again whenever you've done this; letting men completely take over and dominate you in ways against your wishes as if it's perfectly normal. Not to say that’s what the BDSM lifestyle entails. In the past, you’ve had a bad run of Doms who didn’t truly grasp the concept of consent. Men who think they're dominant, on the contrary, they're just abusers. Looks like Joon Jae is just another one. The only thing to do now is play along until you figure out how to escape this - safely.

Joon Jae emerged from the bathroom, rubbing his damp, onyx hair with a towel and a satisfied smile on his face.

“Morning gorgeous,” he greeted with his award winning smile. The term of endearment felt everything but. The word curdling in your ears. Turning over to face him, you put on a face as well as you always could; as if you hadn’t been utterly violated by this man the night before.

“Good morning, sir,” you purred sleepily. The bitterness coated your tongue as the words came out. Whether or not he caught on was not clear - most of them didn’t. As Joon Jae walked over to his black wooden dresser, you continued to lay on your side. Something caught your interest in the corner of your eye. Your gaze fell to your wrists. The handcuffs.

Upon your wrists were bruises from last night; a deep red color fresh in hue. It would certainly darken to purple throughout the day. You began to nibble on your bottom lip as you nervously checked under the blankets for more markings. Peppered on your hips remained fingerprints. They were not markings you were proud of - not like this. Bruises from the right person made you feel empowered, cherished. This was abuse of power - hatred. Your loathing for them grew rapidly; even though they've only just became a part of you.

“Why are you so quiet? Did I wear you out that much?” Nonchalantly, you place the cover back down as if you were only fixing it. Turning your head to face Joon Jae, he pulled on his boxers with an idiotic smirk on his face. His form was still beautiful, yet you were so disgusted by him now. Your eyes couldn’t help but to wander over his body; inspecting him. There was nothing - not a bruise or scratch. Here you lay in his bed completely marked and emotionally wounded by him and he gets to go to work without having to hide a single thing. Typical.

Letting out a big sigh, you sat up in the bed; making sure to cover your body with his gray silk sheets. Ever so slowly do you run your fingers through your hair and gracefully lick your lips to look as innocently seductive as possible. It was time to put on a show, and you were used to this performance. A sly smirk stretched on your face as your eyes became softer. After all, you still have some dignity left. That is something he can’t rob from you.

“And here I thought a little mystery to a woman was appealing. Does my silence bother you, sir?” Your voice slithered with seduction; hoping your little innuendo granted you his kindness with your performance. Joon Jae was a man after all, and you knew how to handle his type - call him Sir, Master. Obey, say please, submit. No matter what, or else. This was a man that got off feeling like he was the greatest thing on this Earth. A man who loved knowing that his submissive was actually afraid of him, displeasing him. To you? He’s the most disgusting person you have ever met.

The dark haired man sauntered over to you, grabbing hold of your chin with his index finger and thumb. A soft yet firm gesture to make you look up at him without protest, yet it felt so putrid.

“Was that sarcasm in your voice that you heard,” he questioned in a quiet tone. And there it is. His lips were barely moving as he spoke; an indication telling you that he didn’t find your comment too cute after all. You subdued your flirtatious attitude and retreated back to what you knew best - submission.

“No sir,” you whispered in a soft voice. He hesitated before letting you go. After a moment of cringing silence, a smile appeared on his face as if he was just messing with you. Using fear to make you submit, and then flipping a switch - how sadistic.

“Good girl. Get up and get dressed. I’ll drop you off at work.” Fighting back every morsel inside of you, you swallowed your pride to obey. You need to come up with a plan when you’re in a safer place. As such, you responded as you always do, following his instructions with a charming smile on your face.

Just as you suspected, the extra dress you brought with you came in handy as you anticipated staying the night. Your naked reflection in the mirror sent chills down your spine. Bruises peppered your skin with revulsion brewing inside of you . There were bags under your eyes as lack of sleep dragged them down. To put it mildly, you looked like hell. No matter how many times you've seen this sight from past failed relationships, the pain you felt in your heart still aches at the same intensity. You’re yearning for love grows more desperate. For real love.

A week’s time flew by as an absolute blur. To say you had quarantined yourself was an understatement - scared to face the world in your vulnerable state. You had completely submerged yourself into full submissive mode. It was all you could do to survive. The fear of what Joon Jae would do to you had clouded your mind as your dark thoughts took over. No matter how hard you tried to think of ways to part ways with him without retaliation, it was useless. There was a desperation coursing through you to reach out to Taehyung. No, you couldn’t. He would drop everything to aid you - fix the problem. It would be a burden. Instead, you carried on with your week as usual.

Dealing with Taehyung was easy. Whenever he asked to see you for lunch, you were busy in meetings. Important meetings with clients were underway thanks to Jisoo making you as booked as possible per your request. Taehyung knows how dedicated you are to your work, and he has all eyes on any projects you’re working on. Nothing out of the ordinary for the new Commissioning Editor, right?

In all honesty, you were legitimately busy besides the tedious work you’ve added to your pile. Your contract with GQ Korea Magazine, Joon Jae’s magazine, was reaching its end which means long hours, lots of editing, and lots of problem solving. You promised them that by the end of the month, you would increase their profits via online and social media by forty percent. Your coworkers told you that it was too risky to promise such a big turnaround, yet that didn’t sway you.

Typically, Kim Publishing worked with writers of novels, short stories, and more of the like. Occasionally, they worked with other companies that seeked better publication and production of their materials - online revenue. Working on this project ensured that while you were trying to remain distant from the world, you could see Joon Jae throughout the days without being entirely alone. Safe.

When he demanded your presence at night, you showed up at his apartment and gave him anything he wanted. Joon Jae did not hold back his passion for pain in forms of pleasure when you were together, but you had finally voiced for him to be cautious with marking you too much. Taehyung’s father’s charity ball was approaching, so requesting to avoid bruising wasn’t exactly unheard of. Unfortunately, that didn’t stop him from putting bruises in places he knew no one could see.

As time progressed, you found yourself reaching a breaking point. Typically, you loved seeing marks tattooed on your body as a reminder of your nights of lust and dominance over you - but not with him. Every time you saw your Dom, you felt like you were going to be sick. Faking orgasms was getting harder each day. Although, as Joon Jae was a purely self-absorbed man, he didn’t really notice.

At last, it was the day before the ball. Arrangements were made to leave work early so you could go home, and practice your song one last time before you had to perform it at the charity ball. You just wish you had the energy to be remotely excited about it. This was supposed to be your night to release your true feelings through the sound of music towards Taehyung. Although, here you were, in a relationship you couldn’t get out of. You're almost positive that Taehyung’s relationship with Yuri has only blossomed wildly this past week. Naturally.

When you arrived at your apartment, it was shortly after noon. Any other day, you would have grabbed lunch by now, but you've completely lost your appetite. It’s been like this all week. You've been surviving on ramyeon and espresso coffees all the while. Luckily, Joon Jae was going to be out of town today for an event, and wouldn’t be back until the ball tomorrow. You were relieved to finally have a whole day to yourself without twitching at the thought of him arriving at your doorstep any minute or ringing your phone.

Once inside your apartment, it felt warm from the sun beaming inside of it. Perks of having a home with large windows in place of exterior walls. For once, you felt like you could breathe as you closed the door, greeted with silence. Your feet dragged you to the bedroom as you dropped your contents one-by-one on any surface you passed by on your way. Walking in a zombie-like state as your body starts to feel like putty, your body relaxes with each step. A hot bath would be absolute heaven right now; perhaps a glass of wine too.

As you take off your cardigan, you hear something shift behind you. You turn around, gasping from shock before easing into instant relief and butterflies. It was your best friend standing there so casually.

“Jesus, Taehyung. You have to stop doing that. You almost gave me a heart attack. Honestly.” You clutch your chest with your hand over your rapidly beating heart. Although who knows if it’s because he scared you, or if this is just how your heart always beats around him. Likely the latter.

Taehyung stood there, examining you. He didn’t say a word, but instead walked up to you blatantly looking you over you with a fiery gaze. And yet, in the same gaze seemed to be softness with concern. You had to subdue the inappropriate thoughts that instantly came to your mind. With a sense of security, and belonging that was not earned, your submissive side called out to his dominant side as he towered over you. He reached to cup your face, but you flinched ever so slightly by accident. This caused him to worry; melting to a sheepish stance.

Taehyung’s touch had never bothered you before. He knew it was always platonically welcomed by you. At this moment, a look of hurt appeared on his face. With caution, Taehyung slowly proceeded to cup your face again, gently turning your head side to side as he looked you over. It was no secret that he was truly concerned about you.

Out of shame, you couldn’t dare look him in the eyes as fear began to fill you; fear that he would see right through you. Taehyung released you, standing before you with a softer demeanor yet he still held a dominant presence. His aura made you want to run into his arms, but you refrained.

“Y/N, how long has this been going on,” he inquired in a low, calm tone. You pulled your oversized cardigan back over your shoulders to bring you extra comfort; suddenly feeling cold and uncomfortable. Just as your anxiety crept in, you noticed that Taehyung seemed fidgety in the slightest. He tried his best to hide it, but you can see his hands twitching inside his pockets.

“What do you mean,” you asked quietly as an attempt to hide your little secret. Swiftly, you move away from him to head towards the kitchen for the glass of wine that you desperately need right now. You could easily sense that Taehyung wanted nothing more but to stop you in your tracks. He suppressed the urge to interject as it wasn’t his place. His arm stopped abruptly as he removed his hand from his pocket, re-routing to “adjust” the hem of his shirt. He followed you to the kitchen casually.

As you grabbed a bottle of merlot, pouring a reasonable amount for yourself, you took a deep breath. Following suit, you poured another for Taehyung as you know he would desire to join you. The first sip didn’t calm your nerves as much as you would have liked but the second one helped a little more. Taehyung took a respectful sip from the glass and maintained eye contact with you. His stare burns into your skin as you become flush with heat.

“Y/N. Answer the question,” he said in a firm voice. This time you looked up at him immediately without hesitation. Your submissive instincts take over as easily as they always do around him. Taehyung wasn’t dressed for work. Casual attire in loose jeans and black t-shirt; something that always looked good on him. You sighed softly as you realized just how much you missed him this past week.

You’ve barely spoken, and you skipped out on your weekly therapy appointment with Yoongi. That’s probably why he was here. Therapists are supposed to keep client confidentiality unless you’re Kim Taehyung who seems to always get what he wants. It was ridiculously infuriating sometimes. It’s not like Yoongi flat out tells Taehyung information but he’s really good at pointing him in the right direction. Why does he even bother? Knowing that the inevitable conversation was about to take place, you took your glass and went back to your room. Taehyung flattened his pillow-like lips, and made way to follow you yet again. For someone that had so little patience, he always seemed to be wildly patient with you.

“I told you I was busy this week,” you retorted with a shrug as you took another sip of wine, “I didn’t even have time to meet with Yoongi. Once this contract with GQ is done, I’ll meet with him, okay? If that’s your worry. You don’t have to interrogate me. Now, if you don’t mind, I was planning on taking a bath. Why don’t we catch up tomorrow at the party?” Your defensiveness took over like a prey-worthy animal in a corner - oversharing when caught.

There was desperation in your voice that you could not hide so easily. Taehyung couldn’t hold back, and reached out to grab your arm. He pulled up one of your cardigan sleeves in a quick motion, revealing the bruised lining around your wrist. You panicked to pull the sleeve back down and dropped your glass of wine. The red liquid spilled on the wooden floor as glass shattered around your feet. In the face of a small scare, you had never been so grateful as to not have carpeting. Red wine stains are the worst.

“Shit,” you whispered. You rolled your eyes as you took a step to get towels - frustrated with yourself. Taehyung stopped you in mid-step. His touch and rapid motion do not trigger you. The air stills. In the face of his dominance, you feel safe. Safer than anything and anywhere else in the world. His warm touch makes your legs weak.

“I’ll take care of it,” he lets out a sigh with worry. You bite your bottom lip, and look down at the ground to avoid his beautiful eyes - gentle almonds filled with care.

“It’s happening again, isn’t it,” Taehyung asked with calmness in his voice, evident with disappointment but primarily worry. He let out a frustrated sigh. Knowing exactly where you keep your cleaning essentials, Taehyung grabs the items effortlessly. His focus truly never leaving you.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Y/N? You promised that you would tell me if someone was taking advantage of you again so I could help you. How can I help you if you shut me out? Don’t you care about yourself? This is...” And then it happened, you shut down. Taehyung stopped himself from proceeding forward as he realized his overreaction wasn’t making you feel any better. What you really needed right now was comfort, not a lecture.

The atmosphere stilled with silence as you fell into submission. Speechless with no words clouding your mind, and too timid to look him in the eyes. Everything went blank. He was right. Leaving him out of this was doing more harm than good, and yet here you were shutting down instead of running to him. Honestly, you didn’t know how to pull yourself out of your head. It was suffocating. Taehyung knelt before you as you spiraled. A soft breath escaped his lips.

“I’m sorry, Taehyung,” was all you could manage to say. A bashful response as you felt that you had disappointed him. Internally, the inner demons you harbored convinced you that he was angry with you and would leave your side. Your best friend tilted his head to try to look at you. A soft, tender gaze looking at you with the sweetest smile on his lips. He reached to brush the hair falling near your eyes. Tears prickled your eyes as you melted into his touch.

“No. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things. That’s not what you needed. I put my worry and needs before yours when you’re clearly not in the right state,” he let out a soft sigh with worry evident on his face.

“What can I do to help you trust me?” He took your silence as an answer, and looked over your covered body. He took notice that you managed to cover every possible inch of you, even on a warm day. Words remained silent on your lips.

“How bad is it,” he continued kindly, “Please. Share your pain with me. Let me in.” Just like that, he unraveled you. Every wall came crashing down as the desperation in his voice made you yearn for him. Suddenly, the words flowed from you so easily; from your first date to the first time he punished you, to the hard limits he abused.

“I was going to text you the first night it happened but...I was too scared. I submitted to him in more ways than I wanted to. I felt so pathetic,” you looked at him with tears in your eyes, “Please don’t be upset with me.” Taehyung’s nostrils were flaring. He was trying so hard to contain his anger towards the man that abused his power over you. After a couple of deep breaths, he stood up and held his hand out to you.

“Come on. I’ll draw you a bath. We’ll talk about this once you get some sleep. You look like you haven’t slept all week,” he said in a low, soothing voice. As much as you wanted to protest, the mention of sleep made your eyes heavier. Delicately, you took his hand and nodded. With his arm around your shoulder, he led you to your bathroom. He knew where everything was and drew you a lavender scented bath - your favorite. After grabbing a towel, he turned to leave but stopped.

“N/N...can I see them? The marks,” you froze in place as his question made your cheeks burn. The marks on your body ranged from your wrists to the back of your hips, and the round mounds behind you. The crimson hue to your skin reached your ears. Taehyung has seen you naked before but that was by accident. One shower incident, not knowing he was inside your home as you danced to the kitchen to grab a snack. One very embarrassing incident - and he laughed.

You know it’s nothing sexual, yet it’s still inadvertently intimate. Even stripping down to your underwear, you’d be so exposed to him. Surprisingly, you considered showing him, to be seen by someone else and feel validated that these marks are just as putrid as you see them. This boundary… Is it appropriate to cross it? He is your best friend after all - the person you trust most.

“The marks? They’re in private places, Tae. I don’t think Yuri would like that very much.” Taehyung stiffened and for once, he seemed slightly embarrassed. Maybe it’s because he’s not used to having a girlfriend and didn’t think about that. He took a step closer and handed you the towel.

“Yuri doesn’t control me,” he said in a stern voice but then softened, “You’re my friend and I- I need to see them. I need to know.” There was sincerity in his eyes. It almost seemed as if he was scared. Is he punishing himself for what happened to you? You've only seen this side of him once before.

You were in the hospital after a bad session with one of your past Doms. Taehyung was away on a business trip for a week and when he came back, you were asleep in the gurney with several bruises and a cut lip. He thought you were asleep, but you could hear his tears and his apology for leaving you; promising he would never let this happen again. On the outside, you looked like you would be fine but he knew you wouldn’t be - not mentally. Perhaps this would be proof to him that this was real yet again. With a soft nod, you slowly began to undress.

Out of respect, Taehyung kept his distance; taking a step back as you did so. First your cardigan, then your knee length dress that hugged your curves - leaving you in your bra and underwear. Surely that would be enough for him to see the bruises that peppered your body - now shades of yellow, green, and brown. His eyes started making their way across your skin. You bit your bottom lip, and watched his gaze. It gave you chills in a way of vulnerability but also, arousal. Thankfully your bra was padded, otherwise he would be able to see how much his eyes affected you. Your nipples were erect, and your underwear damp with need.

Desperately you wanted him to touch you - hold you. You wanted to feel his hands caressing your body in ways it’s never felt before. Somehow you knew that his touch would heal you. It would make you feel no pain, only happiness. Something fierce turned in you, and it took every ounce of your being not to speak up. Taehyung did something that surprised you. His coffee-brown eyes seemed darker or maybe it was in your imagination.

He took a cautious step closer to you. His eyes remained on your hips where the worst bruises rested. On each side, beneath the black fabric that hugged your hips, bruises in shapes of fingerprints - marks of Joon Jae’s nails that had pierced your skin. Your breath became shaky as he stood before you. It was like he was hypnotized by your marks, yet you couldn’t read what was churning in his mind. He extended his hands and slowly reached for your hips. His fingertips brushed over your skin. His eyes moved to yours to look for a sign, expecting you to wince from pain or hesitation of his touch. Little did he know that his touch relaxed you beyond compare.

“S-see...it’s not that bad,” you whispered as you met his gentle gaze. Something shifted in his eyes as your eyes locked, something you've never seen before. You weren’t sure what it was. Yet, he just stood there - unwavering his eyes.

“Taehyung-”

“I should go. I have to take care of something before the ball. Thank you…for showing me,” he said softly. You nodded as he released his gentle hold on you, leaving you cold and in need of his touch again.

“Min-hyuk will pick you up at 7 tomorrow night. I’ll be wearing a black mask. Come find me when you arrive, okay?” A lighthearted chuckle escaped you as he handed you the towel to cover yourself.

“A black mask in a sea of other masks? I don’t think that’ll be too hard.” He smiled back at your little joke, and left you alone in your bathroom. As soon as you heard the door closing faintly in the distance, you felt like you could breathe again. Your body was on fire as you could still feel his touch. It felt like electric waves coursed through your veins just in a few seconds.

Turning to the warm bath that awaited you, the bath he drew for you, you sighed. When you discarded your bra, your nipples perked just as you knew they would. It was no surprise that when you eased your underwear down your legs, a string of arousal clung to them as your core remained swollen. As usual, the bliss of your own fingers, imagination, and a soothing bath will have to ease your ache for yet another night.

Not a single word out of Joon Jae today. It wasn’t unusual but since he was returning today from his trip, you figured you would have had a message from him with instructions for tonight. Although it’s not like you’re complaining. His silence is your saving grace.

As you sat in the back of Min-hyuk’s car, you watched the traffic as it rushed by. He looked in the rearview mirror to glance at you. Your mask wasn’t in place yet as there was no reason to hide your identity just yet. There was never a need for a divider between you as he was your friend as well.

“Miss Y/N,” he said from the front. Your gaze met his in the mirror and smiled in turn.

“Yes Min-hyuk?” Min-hyuk’s eyes flickered between you and the road to drive safely. He watched the road as he spoke.

“You look very beautiful tonight. I hope you smile a lot tonight. You deserve it, N/N.” His words made your heart skip a beat. Min-hyuk was like family to you. Almost like an uncle but more of a dear, old friend. He told you once that he hopes his daughter grows up to be like you, and that was the greatest compliment he could have given. Although, for both of their sake, you hope she becomes much better; stronger and wiser, just like her father. Min-hyuk stopped the car as he pulled into the Kim’s driveway. Grabbing your mask to put in place, you leaned forward to get closer to Min-hyuk. You gently placed your hand on his shoulder to kiss his cheek.

“I don’t know what I would do without you, Min-hyuk. Thank you.” He smiled back at you whilst trying to remain professional, he averted his gaze straight ahead. Various people in all colors and shapes cascading into the radiant home. So many elegant gowns with elaborate details to match the masquerade theme. A gentle thought crossed your mind and you couldn’t resist.

“Why don’t you go home? I can easily find a ride home. Besides, I’m sure your daughter would love to see you at a decent hour.” There was a sparkle of hope and admiration in his eyes that you couldn’t help but to adore.

“Don’t worry. I’ll let Taehyung know I relieved you. I’ll take the scolding.” It was obvious that Min-hyuk tried masking his excitement but you could see right through it. With the slightest of smiles but the fullest heart, Min-hyuk got out of the car to open your door. You got out and stood by his tall, broad form.

“Thank you, ma’am,” he responded. Smiling at him, you squeezed his forearm gently.

“Have a good night, Min-hyuk.” With that, you sauntered off into the night to join the rest of the mysterious guests of Min-ho’s masquerade ball.

The Kim’s home, that had always been your safe haven, had transformed into a modern renaissance extravaganza. It was simply stunning. Hues of red and gold filled the room with chandeliers to add to the expensive tone. Jesters and performers of all kinds were scattered around the room to entertain guests as they walked by. From jugglers to a man swallowing a ball of fire as if it was water quenching his thirst.

A smile appeared on your face in appreciation of how well the Kim’s always throw a party. It was over the top and yet they always spent more money than they pocketed in profit. It’s never about the money for such events, especially a charity event. This night is for underprivileged children in broken homes and drug addictions. A cause they have always been passionate about. It was admirable - and why you’re a part of their family today.

Feeling confident as you glided into the mansion, you felt proud of your dress. You felt sexy. It was conservative yet not. The dress caught your eye ages ago, deciding to keep it for a special occasion. A golden dress with glimmering accents that made you feel radiant. Your bare skin peeking through the nude toned mesh material, from afar looking see-through in a teasing way. Sequins reflecting every light you pass under as if you were a walking piece of jewelry - not too tacky or gaudy. A delicate turtleneck with exposed shoulders to reveal your soft skin in contrast to the floor length gown. Caressing your hips and between your breasts was a sheer fabric that lightly exposed your skin, just enough to show you were not wearing a bra or underwear - not enough to give everyone a show. Fortunately, the material cupping your breasts was thick enough to hide the perk to your nipples as the dress was mildly stimulating. The ensemble you chose didn’t go unnoticed by the others at the party. People casually glanced your way, yet your head remained high as confidence coursed through you

A gold mask laid on your face well enough to hide your insecurities. It matched your dress in its sparkle and shine. There is just enough makeup for a natural, bronze look to pair evenly with your attire. With grace, you scanned the room as you walked through. The Kim’s decorated their home to look like a casino to allow people to gamble for a cause. People of all sorts spread throughout the home at blackjack tables, poker, craps, roulette, but also the dance floor. Smooth jazz played in the background as the live band and black tied man sang at the microphone.

For the first time in a while, you felt unafraid and sure of yourself. At least until you saw something that made your confidence drop into the pit of your stomach. Taehyung entered the room with a silver dressed goddess on his arm - Yuri. She wore a silky dress that clung to her petite body. It was apparent that Taehyung bought it for her. It had his taste written all over it. Even you could tell that Yuri was a simple girl that didn’t like extravagant things. The dress suited her and you can’t deny that you don’t envy her for it. Although you love the dress you're in, a part of you wants to be in that dress instead - or perhaps, on Taehyung’s arm. Thankfully, Taehyung’s elegant mother approaches you, and gives you the distraction you desperately needed.

“Y/N! Oh my… You-,” she let out a sigh and smiled sweetly with tears in her eyes, “You look absolutely stunning, dear.” Sooyoung reaches you, immediately giving you a kiss on each cheek after a warm hug as she always does when she sees you. She looked stunning in her black dress. She always looked beautiful in such a warm way that made you feel nothing but comfort.

“Thank you, Sooyoung. You look beautiful beyond words as always. The party seems like a success as I knew it would.” Sooyoung smile, humbly brushing off your compliment. Letting out a pleased sigh, she looked around and nodded.

“You’re too kind, dear. It turned out very well. I can’t say I’m not proud.” At that moment, Taehyung and Yuri turned towards you to meet Min-ho, his father, to exchange a few words. You tried your best not to acknowledge the situation. Fortunately, a waiter walked by with a tray of champagne. Quickly taking a stemmed glass, you downed it without a problem. Sooyoung smirked and took a sip from her own that she gathered as well.

“I’m sorry to hear about Joon Jae, although I’m sure you’re a little relieved,” she said as she lowered her glass. This caught your attention. You cocked your head slightly as you lowered your glass to hold elegantly in your hand.

“Joon Jae? What do you mean?”Sooyoung almost looked amused at your question.

“Why do you sound so surprised? It’s been all over the news all day - the arrest. Surely, you heard about it,” she waited a moment before continuing, “Embezzling thousands of dollars for years is bound to catch up with a person. I must say, I had a bad feeling about him. At least now you don’t have to part ways in an uncomfortable way. Assuming you would be parting ways, that is.” Embezzling money? What on earth is she talking about? You tried your best not to seem too surprised. Instead, you nodded to agree with her. Thankfully, a couple approached her to grasp her attention; giving you an opportunity to get away.

Out of your small clutch purse, you pulled out your phone. Your instinct told you to just search on Naver for Joon Jae’s name to see what came up. To your surprise, his name appeared instantly in a headline - “Ahn Joon Jae Hordes Thousands from GQ Korea Magazine”. Within the first paragraph, it described his crime; stating he stole money from the company through false stocks and bonds. An anonymous tip warned the authorities yesterday afternoon and he was arrested the moment he landed back in Seoul from a business trip. Something about this raised an alarm inside of you. You looked up from your phone to find Taehyung. He was deep in conversation with another couple with Yuri clinging to his side.

A part of you felt upset by this, yet another part felt touched. The ultimate fear inside of you of the consequences from this couldn’t help but to surface. There was no doubt it was Taehyung. The situation was too perfectly timed. He had to take care of something alright, you thought. Joon Jae was a powerful man. Could Taehyung’s power overshadow his or would this come back to haunt you? Your thoughts were interrupted by a man in a tuxedo in a black and silver mask. This man was Ki-young, Taehyung’s older brother.

“Can our girl dress to impress or what? N/N, you look freaking amazing,” the golden retriever said cheerfully. It was obvious from his ecstatic mannerisms that it was your unrelated brother. Right away, you could recognize his date from your previous dinner together. She wore an elegant blue dress that complimented her dyed blonde hair accompanied by a silver mask. Ki-young leaned forward to give you a kiss on the cheek and you reciprocated.

“You always know how to make a girl feel special. Hello Yoona. You look beautiful. I can see why Ki-young is so cheerful tonight.” The young woman blushed, and squeezed Ki-young’s arm as she held onto him.

“Thank you. I have to say this isn’t your everyday crowd, but it’s a lot of fun being here dressed like this. So many elites and chaebols are here,” she whispers excitedly, “But seriously, N/N. That dress is to die for. Your boyfriend must be a mess seeing you like this. Where is uh...Joon Jae, right?” Ki-young looked a little guilty towards you, or at least knowing of the situation. You simply smiled kindly.

“Joon Jae isn’t here tonight. I came alone. I couldn’t let this dress go to waste,” you teased lightly, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to speak with Min-ho for a moment. Have a good evening you two.” As much as you wanted your exit to seem nonchalant, Yoona looked at Ki-young with apologetic eyes. She could sense she unintentionally made you uncomfortable. He assured her that she did nothing wrong with a simple kiss to her temple.

Indeed, you did go to find Min-ho for further instructions on your performance tonight. You couldn’t face Taehyung; not yet at least. Besides, he was busy entertaining Yuri, so you didn’t want to interrupt them. In fact, the more you thought about it, knowing you were truly alone tonight, all you wanted to do was sing your song and make your exit. Going home, putting on some pajamas, and watching a chick flick with a big glass of wine sounded delightful - maybe a whole bottle.

Min-ho was found standing with Sooyoung as they spoke to another lavish couple. As you approached them, you tried sneaking glances at Taehyung. Luckily, he never noticed. Your fictive kin parents took notice of you as you approached them, and said their goodbyes to the couple they were speaking with.

“N/N, dear, you look stunning. I’m so glad you made it,” Min-ho said with delight. You leaned forward to give him a kiss on the cheek. He had such young features for a man his age; so comforting and bright. The Kim’s were truly a good looking family, even including Taehyung being adopted into the family. Their wealth and status never faltered their kindhearted nature. They always remained true and pure. You couldn’t have asked for a better family to stand by your side throughout your years.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” you took another quick glance at Taehyung, whom you found on the dance floor with Yuri. Sooyoung took notice as she always does - as most mothers do.

“So, your performance. Are you well prepared?” Min-ho smirked as the instruments in the background came to an end. The guests clapped respectfully for the band. Butterflies tingled to your very core.

“It looks like it will be about right about now,” he remarked with a wink as he walked towards the stage. The intoxication of the champagne seemed to hit you like an IV tap - giving you enough courage to carry on. Sooyoung stepped closer to you and put her hand on your arm for comfort.

“Don’t be nervous, dear. It’s going to be beautiful,” Sooyoung reassured in her sweetest, motherly tone. With a sigh, you put your hand over hers before she let go.

“I’m...going to sing something different. Something with more meaning. I don’t think the world is ready for the mess I’ve been writing these days,” you joked with a nervous laugh. It was a decision you were perfectly happy with. Most of the songs you sang had a dark and somber meaning between the lines. This selection was specifically driven towards a more light yet still romantic setting. As you sat down each night to practice this song, something felt right. This song made your heart hurt in the most healing way - the old, jazz classic, Everytime We Say Goodbye.

“It is my pleasure to introduce a beautiful, young woman who has been nothing less than a daughter to me and my wife over the years. It turns out that she has wonderful talent, and now she’s going to share it with all of you. We’re delighted to witness such a gift. Ladies and gentlemen, Y/N L/N.” When you heard your name, your heart pounded in your chest. Your eyes on the microphone as you approached the small stage area.

It’s been so long since you've performed in front of people. Well, you had piano recitals in school, but you didn’t have to open your mouth to sing. Ever. This was new territory and surprisingly, you didn’t feel like you were going to throw up. Although, it did feel like your heart was beating in your throat. A part of you felt relief that Soo-young convinced you to stand outside of your comfort zone. It was especially invigorating as no one really knew you could sing. And now, the people closest to you and a room of elite strangers were about to see your vulnerability on display.

The crowd lightly applauded as you took your graceful strides forward. When you got up to the stage, you were greeted with a sea of elegant men and women in extraordinary dresses and masks - a beautiful sight yet excruciatingly intimidating. Even though this was an upscale lifestyle you were used to seeing, you still didn’t feel as if you fit in. But now, with this song, you could escape to a world that was always your safe place. It should be a terrifying thought but the only set of eyes that make you weak in the knees are his.

The piano keys begin playing in the background in a harmonious fashion. Nervous fingers twitch at your side to the melody to follow along the rhythm. Instantly, as you close your eyes to take it all in, it takes you back to your childhood. When you and Taehyung were having your darkest of days. Playing jazz albums on the vinyl player he kept in his room, this song in particular - Every Time We Say Goodbye. Tonight, the beautiful melody was sung by you.

We love each other so deeply That I ask you this, sweetheart Why should we quarrel ever? Why can't we be enough clever, never to part -

It wasn’t until you drew out the last note that you finally opened your eyes. Closing your eyes allowed you to feel the music and travel back to the time you held so near and dear to your heart. When you opened them, your focus was on the pair of brown eyes that always made your heart flutter. It took no time to find them as if your auras were calling out to each other. The melody remained slow as your voice led the flow of the chords. So tender and raw with a hint of deep love with each note that escaped your lips. A fabrato purred in your throat with each ending word naturally.

Every time we say goodbye, I die a little Every time we say goodbye, I wonder why a little Why the gods above me, who must be in the know - Think so little of me They allow you to go -

The song flowed in perfect harmony with your voice as people began slow dancing along. Eyes respectfully tried to remain on you as your presence was captivating in every way. In particular, Taehyung was watching. There was a soft smile on his lips. You couldn’t tell if he was surprised or in awe or just content to be near his beloved. Yuri said something to him that you couldn’t make out. He then turned his attention back to her. It was only for a moment and his gaze was back on you as they continued dancing with one another.

When you're near, There's such an air of spring about it I can hear a lark somewhere begin to sing about it - There's no love song finer But how strange the change from major to minor Every time we say goodbye Every time we say goodbye -

The song came to an end with a big weight lifted off of your chest. The room cheered. In Particular, you took notice of Ki-young and Min-ji clapping and cheering louder than anyone else in the room - such supportive siblings. You couldn’t help but to smile with a tinted rose in your cheeks. Graciously, you curtsied to the crowd. Walking off the stage, the band began playing the next song to keep the mood for the party. You decided to go towards the dance floor to find everyone; well, Taehyung. Interrupting your search with eagerness, Ki-young, Yoona, and Min-ji walked up to you. Min-ji was the first to give you the biggest hug her petite body could handle.

“Y/N L/N! Oh my god! I didn’t know you could sing like that! Babe, you sounded like an angel!" As you hugged her back, you couldn’t help but to giggle. Her enthusiasm made you feel warm. Min-ji was always such a bright spirit and you loved her for it.

“Thanks Min-ji. I’m sorry I didn’t greet you before going on. You look ravishing as always.” Min-ji gave you a look and then the same to Ki-young.

“Can you ever take a compliment without giving one back,” she asked with a laugh, “but thank you. You know how much I love a good party.”

“You love anything that involves you dressing up, Min,” Ki-young interrupted with a kind smile. Min-ji turned to him with a cheeky smile showing that he was right on the nose.

“You know me all too well, big brother.” At that moment, Taehyung arrived by your side and gently placed his hand on your lower back. An instant chill ran up your spine as you caught a glimpse of the coy smile he gave his siblings; his scent filling your nose. Smoked cherries - spicy and sweet. Ba-dum, ba-dum. Be still my heart.

“Ki-young, Yoona, Min-ji, do you mind if I steal N/N for a moment?” The trio smiled and willingly let him whisk you away. He didn’t waste any time to take you further onto the floor, readying himself in position to start dancing with you. He held you close and your instinct was to find Yuri to ensure this didn’t bother her. She couldn’t be seen anywhere.

“Where’s your date,” you asked casually. Taehyung looked at you without an emotion you could read and held your hand a little tighter in an endearing way - a comforting way.

“She’ll be back soon. So, when were you planning on telling me that you could sing like that? I've known you practically your whole life and I've never heard you. Curious.” The word slithered out like a snake who just caught his victim. The way he asked seemed as if he was slightly insulted that he didn’t know. A playful scoff came out. The man acts as if there can be no secrets between you two. Little does he know. He discovered something about you that he couldn’t read in a file. Poor thing. You looked into his eyes and remained coy.

“You don’t have to know everything about me, you know?” He laughed lightly in amusement. Lowering himself to meet your ear so only you could hear, his breath tickled your skin.

“You and I both know that’s far from the truth. I must know everything about you,” his voice hummed deliciously in a way that made you shiver, “For what it’s worth, you have a beautiful voice, along with how you look tonight. You sang our song. Should I be flattered or was that just a coincidence?” His gaze returned to yours as he parted from the side of your face. Prayers couldn’t prevent your cheeks from changing colors. His irises seemed darker somehow. It made your heart race.

“It depends. Are you flattered, Taehyung?” Wait. Are we flirting? It’s been a while since we’ve been playful towards each other; at least since before Yuri came into the picture. A smirk formed on his perfectly shaped lips - hypnotizing.

“Flattered enough that I want to hear you again. Would you sing for me,” he asked in an enticing voice. It was then that you realized how close you were dancing together. His touch felt like fire against your lower back as the material of your dress was dangerously thin. You could feel how firm his chest was as your torsos were sandwiched together. The smell of his body wash and light scented cologne makes your head spin. Surely he could feel how fast your heart was beating. Or perhaps he could smell how aroused you are. Your cheeks flushed deeper as you looked up at him.

“You know I’ll do anything you ever ask of me. I’ll do anything for you, Taehyung,” you said in a submissive tone. Saying his name when you spoke to him was your own way of being submissive to him, but you're not sure if he ever noticed. Something changed in his expression. It seemed as if time stood still. Suddenly, Taehyung’s attention averted towards the entrance. Yuri was headed out in a rushed fashion - almost as if she was running away. His attention was no longer in your presence as he watched her descend towards the doors.

“Perhaps a raincheck. Excuse me.” And in an instant, Taehyung left. Initially, the feeling of disappointment coursed through you yet your empathy took over. Whatever it was, it would be awful of her boyfriend to just stand there and watch her leave. And yet, how quickly he ran to her without hesitation made your heart drop ever so slightly. You got your dance and sang your song. May as well make your exit. Regardless, it was all you wanted from this evening.

Sooyoung and Min-ho are sitting at a table engaging in conversation with other elites. With a deep breath to regain your composure, you make your way over there to say goodbye. They both look up at you with delight.

“Sorry to leave so early but I think I’m going to go,” you interrupt politely. Min-ho went to speak but was pulled into another conversation by a peer. Sooyoung looked disappointed by this.

“But the evening has just begun, darling. Won’t you stay for the auction? It’s coming up soon.” Ah, the auction. Bidding on items and events isn’t exactly your cup of tea. Your contribution was your voice and you couldn’t bear to be there any longer. Walking over behind them, you kissed each of them on the cheek.

“Enjoy your evening, okay? I’ll come over soon to share a meal.” Sooyoung opened her mouth to protest, however, you left before you could hear another reason to stay. For once, you wanted to be selfish. You needed to be selfish. Besides, nothing sounded more appealing to you than spending the remainder of the night with yourself. Perhaps tonight, you’ll start learning how to move on; starting with the biggest bottle of wine that you can find.

It was nearly midnight and you were sure the party had come to an end by now. A content sigh escaped you as you walked out of your bedroom in your most comfortable loungewear. Face washed and your routine night care had been complete - leaving you feeling fresh. Eagerness coursed through your veins as your bare feet led you towards the kitchen. A steaming cup of tea awaited you.

With your cup in hand, you walked over to your couch whilst taking tiny sips to soothe your soul. A fuzzy blanket laid lazily just calling out your name. Now that the ball was over, a weekend ahead of catching up on rest seemed like a dream. Just as you were about to turn on an episode of one of your favorite dramas, there was a knock on the door. Panic made you freeze; alert yet confused. Who would be at your door this late at night?

Fear rose in your chest as you slowly got off the couch. Please don’t let it be Joon Jae… Your phone in hand ready in case you need to make an emergency call to someone, anyone. Thoughts mumbling internally as you approach the tiny security screen near your door, you take a peak to see your visit. To your surprise, it was the last person you were expecting to see. Instantly, you opened the door.

“Taehyung? What are you doing here?” His hair looked slightly teased. His suit jacket was gone leaving him just in a button down shirt, the top two buttons undone and his tie unraveled around his collar. He looked up at you in a way that caused your heart to skip a beat. Had he been crying?

“She’s gone. I guess I’m more of a monster than I thought…” His voice sounded so defeated. It broke your heart into two. Nothing stopped you from reaching out for his hand to lead him inside.

“Ah... Come inside,” your soothing voice whispered. When you closed the door, he stood in place. Looking around your apartment as if it was the first time he had ever been here. Lost and dazed. What the hell happened to make him so disheveled? As much as you wanted to wrap your arms around him, you decided to keep your distance. Instead, you went to the kitchen to grab a cup of tea for him as well. He looked like he desperately needed one - something comforting. When you returned to him, he hadn’t moved an inch. He slowly reached for the cup, wrapping his hands around it without taking a sip.

“What happened? I haven’t seen you like this...in a really long time. Are you okay?” Somehow, you felt as if you could feel his pain. Your attachment to him truly took a hold. The empathetic connection you shared was all consuming, as if you had the power to fix everything.

“She wanted to see. She wanted to know how far I could go. It wasn’t even my furthest. I proceeded with caution, started slowly. But she looked at me as if I abused her. I trusted her to tell me to stop and she never did. Why didn’t she use her safe word? I...I don’t know what I did wrong.” Blood boiled inside of you. Although he spoke without much context, you knew exactly what he meant. Yuri must have challenged Taehyung to show her his true dominance. Why like this? Yuri was new to the world of BDSM. Trust is the utmost important aspect of the realm. To defy this trust is the worst you can do - whether as the dominant or the submissive.

Remember when you interviewed Yuri a while back, she asked you questions about this lifestyle. It wasn’t a life for her. She didn’t understand. You don’t just become submissive. You either are or you’re not. Maybe you should have warned Taehyung but he needed to see for himself. In the moment, all you could do was keep to yourself. Now wasn’t the time for “I told you so”. He needed a friend, a confidant.

“You’re not a monster. Don’t ever think that way. You have strong feelings for Yuri and I get that. I really do. You gained feelings for someone who doesn’t understand this life, which isn’t easy. Being a dominant or a submissive isn’t a sin. It’s not weird or unusual. It’s an intense relationship that involves trust in so many forms. You need someone who can give you the best of both worlds - a submissive and a deep connection outside of the bedroom. I’m...sorry that person wasn’t Yuri. Give it some time. Maybe she just needs to think about it and she’ll come around. If you’ll accept her trust again, that is.” Taehyung’s gaze never left yours as you spoke. Something softened in his eyes.

“I don’t think I could trust her again. Who is to say she won’t do it again? Maybe…I need someone that can give me that trust. Someone...like you.” Your jaw dropped and lips dried as you lost your breath. Eyes widened at his words, your head frantically started replaying his words to make sure you heard them correctly.

“I-I...I don’t know w-what you mean. You’re not thinking clearly. Why don’t we sit on the couch?” Fighting every fiber of your being to think too much into the situation, you turned to go towards the couch. His hand reached for your wrist to still you. His eyes were dark, lingering enough to make your skin heat with anticipation.

“I’m thinking more clearly than I have in my entire life. Y/N, why didn’t you tell me how you felt?” Time stood still. What did he mean? It couldn’t be. The song perhaps? How did he know? Thinking back, you recalled getting an unusual text from his mother after you left the ball.

It will all be better soon. I promise, dear.

Sooyoung. What the hell did she say to him? The breath in your lungs became dense as the room became smaller. The deepest secret between the two of you had been revealed without your permission. A string of emotions rushed over you as you tried to find a way to escape this.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. We’re...just friends. That’s it,” you stuttered timidly as you tried to play it off with nervous laughter. Taehyung didn’t look phased.

“If you wanted to be more, all you had to do was ask. I thought I was clear about that.” Then that’s when you started putting the pieces together. Did he think you just wanted to be his submissive? You couldn’t help but to laugh lightly - insulted.

“Taehyung, I’ve told you a thousand times. I don’t want to be your sub. I value our friendship far too much for that. I don’t know what your mother told you but I think you got the wrong idea. Don’t read too much into things.” Feeling the perfect opportunity as he loosened his grip, you removed your wrist from his hand. The fear of him feeling your heightened pulse made you retreat from his warm touch. Surely she said something subtle and he took it the wrong way. He’s suggested such a dom-sub relationship for years; no strings attached. It was a line you could never cross as you knew you would get attached and want more. A real relationship. Love.

“I’m sorry, Taehyung, but that’s not a line I can cross with you.” Your gaze into his eyes were soft - sincere. Rejecting his offer yet again to avoid a potential broken heart, it was the best solution. It had to be.

“So you’re not in love with me then,” Taehyung replied in a low, sultry tone. Your breath caught in your throat, your eyes widened in alarm. Shock got the best of you, making you drop your teacup causing it to shatter against the floor - the only sound that remained in the room besides your thoughts.

Fuck...

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zvtara-was-never-canon · 3 months ago

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One of the things that annoy me the most about people (mostly zutarians) trying to argue that Zuko saying he wasn't being himself in a war meeting with Ozai somehow means he doesn't want to be Fire Lord or date Mai is not just how it completely misinterprets Zuko's character and the things he has explicitly stated to want multiple times - but also because it ignores one of the most realistic portrayals of what it is like to live with an abuser that isn't on Evil Bastard mode 24/7.

During "Nightmares And Daydreams" Zuko is being treated shockingly well. He can get literally anything he wants, whenever he wants. He is being so pampered that he doesn't even have to walk anywhere if he doesn't feel like it, and everyone adores him - he is basically being treated like Azula.

Yet unlike Azula, he was not invited to the meeting. And he doesn't feel safe to ask his father about it directly or to just assume there was some communication issue and show up regardless of the "lack of" invitation. And considering what happened last time he tried, it's not hard to see why he feels that way.

But oh look! He WAS supposed to be there! And Ozai even refused to start the meeting without him! He saved Zuko a spot so he'd be at his right hand, and even wants to hear him out when discussing ideas! Surely that means he cares about Zuko and values his opinions, right?

Not quite. There's another catch. There's ALWAYS another catch. He can say what he wants... provided it is what Ozai wants to hear.

Zuko has every privilege in the world, but he doesn't have the basic to right to have his own opinions, to speak to his own parent and to not constantly fear he will suddenly be, at best, ignored, and at worst physically abused, kicked from home and cut off from everything and everyone he is familair with just because Ozai woke up in a bad mood or felt challenged/insulted in some way.

This episode was not about Zuko realising he didn't love Mai, or wanted to go back to the job he canonically hated. It's about him finally realizing that the most luxurious cage in the world is still a cage. That he will never feel safe with his abuser around, even if Ozai isn't constantly lashing out. That no matter how good his life seems to be on the surface, he will never truly have anything (from basic stuff like a roof over his head to luxuries like literal royal treatment) when there's someone that can just randomly decide to take it all away from him and not face any consequences for it because he has absolute power over everyone.

That's why in lots of frames during his conversations with Iroh, the animation makes it look like Zuko is behind bars while his uncle is free. Why Azula, the child that stuck by Ozai's side, ends the show having a breakdown and feeling worthless after being randomly abandoned by him and excluded from what was supposed to be THEIR moment. Why during the eclipse, Zuko literally says "I'm going to speak my mind and you're going to listen."

And why he confessed that entire inner conflict to Mai - yes, his girlfriend, but also someone who can RELATE to his struggles, because while her parents are not abusive, they are neglectful to the point of it being criminal and she full on says "I could get anything I wanted, as long as I behaved."

She knows what's like to feel trapped, and that's a big part of why Zuko felt comfortable enough to "take the mask off" with her instead of with anyone else.

#anti zutara #pro maiko #pro mai #zuko meta #abuse

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athanasius-symposium-of-writings · 1 year ago

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this was for an ask but it became something different from the ask but I still wanted to post it cuz cute (tm)

Rated M (im just being safe)

taglist: @ghostinvenus

The kiss is terrible, you tremble, lips just pressing on his; it's so bad. Astarion has had his share of terrible kisses, inexperienced kisses, and ones that left him out of breath (rarely). Yours easily tells him everything about you, from why your hands try to figure out what to do, to why you try angling your face, and pressing your lips on his. You retreat with heated cheeks, eyes looking everywhere but his face.

"That… Wasn't good, was it?"

He laughed, "If you have to ask, it was bad." It is cute truthfully seeing you sulk followed by throwing your hands in the air, "You are overthinking this." His hand reached and cupped the side of your face, "Look at me." Your eyes can't stay on his face, shy and nervous. "Look." When your red eyes meet his red eyes, "Build up the anticipation," His thumb traces your lips, lightly brushing your bottom lip, "You are in control." When he pushes his thumb ever so lightly past your lips, you don't know why but you welcome it parting your lips and your tongue licking flesh.

His lips form a smirk as you easily get enchanted then lead in as his thumb keeps your mouth open, "Do as I do." Like a spell, spoken and you obey.

This is a kiss.

His hand remains on your face caressing your cheek, the other around your waist supporting you. You are still confused about what to do yet where your mind lacks, your body reacts; instinctively seeking him. Your hands gripping the back of his poet blouse, your body leaning as if sculptured to fit with his, mouth meshing with his and tongue tasting him.

Wine and blood, strange that excites you.

The kiss is still inexperienced but not as terrible as before. His eyes are half shut while yours are completely closed. Seeing the way you struggle to match him, the relief when he welcomes your tongue in his mouth.

Happy. You look happy when the kiss ends.

"So this is why there are so many love poems." The observation blurted out of your mouth, "This is inspiring."

"Oh, should I expect a flowery love song tomorrow evening?" Teasing you as he releases his hold on you, physically leaving your warmth is getting harder to do as these days pass.

"A song? Astarion, you inspire a symposium with only the way you look."

He laughs, that narcissistic laugh which given your words is deserving, "Go on."

"Kissing you or talking." Your hands didn't leave his body, they rested on his waist as if fearing him escaping into the moonlight, swept away by Selunê's glow.

"Either one is quite interesting."

You are on that high of your first kiss with him, "Can I have more?" Lowering your head with eyes looking up at him, "Kisses, I mean."

"So polite," Oh, how he enjoys you discovering the pleasures of the flesh. "Of course." Once more he moves to take charge only to stop as you copy his movements from before, though your fingers tracing the shape of his face then his ear.

A lyrical tone follows your next words, "Hot blood begets hot thoughts," Recalling words from a book your mother gave you, "And hot thoughts beget hot deeds," Your nose brushes against his. "And hot deeds is love." When the kiss happens, you are slow. Methodical.

Astarion makes adjustments along the way even as his mind is on that line you sang to him.

One could say there is nothing behind those words or one could see it as a confession. Well, another confession as you do not hide your heart from him.

When you both end up on the ground under the stars of clear night, he has you singing his name. A siren's charm ensnares him.

It is you who starts greeting him with silly flowery words. With the tune of a lute, violin, or flute at night serenading him over a meal of wine, bread, and cheese. In love, helplessly and innocently.

The only good side of this is that he isn't using the charms to hand you off to Cazador, you are his.

And that slips out.

Vampires cannot love, they are creatures of the night blessed by Kanchelsis to feed on blood and debauchery (as stated in the books from your old master's library).

Yet, he feels its grip! The way you care for him, respect him, seek him as a person and not a tool.

Things he lacked towards you— you are just another sorry spawn who will help him achieve his goal…

Clumsy.

He tries to list what he would change about you, flaws that bother him. And there are many as he makes a mental list while currently watching you from the shadows. You are providing a distraction as he steals something you need for some ridiculous quest.

Too helpful.

Maybe that is good for him when he has you in his service upon his ascension.

Nice.

Definitely too nice for your own good. It makes him want to be nice to you back, God. Even now he had to threaten someone because you froze because someone didn't feed before getting here, saw the way your eyes glowed with the hunger. Probably will kill that patron after he returns to your side with the stolen documents.

Those eyes follow you, studying the body he knows quite well, then to the way the low-cut blouse exposes your neck and from his view the hickey he left from yesterday morning.

"Thank you, Astarion." Breathing slowly to tame the beast. "Guess you were right."

"Trust the one who has been at this for two hundred years, darling." The smile you give is downright blinding. He turns his head away, "Here." The evidence you take and read over.

Nice…

“Hm?” You do not stop him when he kisses you. In this smelly, loud, and dirty tavern; you felt the world fall away with Astarion’s lips on yours, a feeling shared.

#reader insert #fanfiction #astarion x tav #astarion x you #astarion x reader #baldurs gate astarion #astarion #baldurs gate 3 fanfiction #baldur's gate 3

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ts1m1kas · 1 year ago

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Original Ask: the main concept is that the reader was hired as an intern in the media team for barca, she’s young, has a fiery tongue and can handle herself around players, and gavi ( who’s known to be a hot head cause he’s sergio ramos’s long lost son lol ) cannot help but melt everytime he sees her, pedri tries to nudge his best friend into talking but a funny incident happens that causes them to admit their feelings to each other. (@findingnemosworld)

Word Count: 904 words

(author's note: another request from @findingnemosworld whose ideas never fail to amaze me 🩷 apologies for the lack of fics, my inspiration seemed to disappear on me !!)

Being hired for a media internship at Barcelona Football Club was the best thing to ever happen to Y/N. Every day was different, and she had developed close relationships with the players.

Y/N had a reputation around the Barça office for being brutally honest with a fiery tongue. She voiced every thought that came into her head and never lied to anyone.

She had been tasked with setting up the training equipment for the session on that day. She walked through the corridors of the training complex, heading towards the equipment cupboard.

Pablo's coach had also sent him to retrieve a clipboard from the same cupboard that, unbeknownst to him, Y/N had been sent to.

What Y/N didn't know was that Pablo had been admiring her from afar for a while. Every time he saw her, he flushed red with embarrassment. He thought she was the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen.

Pedri and Ansu were walking through the same corridor. They saw Y/N collecting cones and balls to take out to the field for the team to use during their training session.

When Pedri saw him enter the same cupboard as her, he took his chance. He locked the door behind Pablo and ran back to Ansu, laughing.

Pedri was sick of hearing his best friend talk about Y/N. Every time the pair saw her, Pablo would try and drag him away in fear of making a fool of himself. In an effort to finally get the pair together, Pedri resorted to locking the pair in the cupboard. If that didn’t work, he didn’t know what would.

Hearing the door close behind him, Pablo spun around. His eyes widened when he saw the doors were shut.

"Hello? Who is it?"

Pablo recognised that voice. He'd know it anywhere. It froze him to the spot. He didn't want to believe what was happening to him at that moment.

"Pablo, is that you?" He heard Y/N ask. He finally saw her walk into view.

"Yeah, it's me. I think the door's locked itself, so we might be in here for a while." He replied, scratching the back of his head awkwardly.

"Oh no. The team won't get their training equipment on time then."

She frowned. The idea of losing her internship made her sick. All she wanted to do was get the equipment and watch her friends train.

“It’s fine, I’m sure they’ll notice we’re gone soon.”

Y/N let out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding in.

“How come you’re in here anyway? I thought you just had to turn up to training?”

Pablo laughed and shook his head.

“Coach wanted a clipboard, and I knew they were in here.”

Silence descended over the pair. Pablo wracked his brain, trying to think of something else to say to Y/N. His fear of embarrassing himself was growing larger by the second.

“You look pretty today. Not that you don’t look pretty every day, just you look really-”

Y/N cut off his bashful rambling, “Thank you, Pablo, that’s nice of you.”

Since starting her work with the football team, Y/N had always liked Pablo. As she got to know him more over the years, she noticed herself falling for the young player rapidly. His humour and kind nature drew her in, and before she knew it, she was hooked.

Being locked in the equipment cupboard wasn’t where she thought she would finally confess her feelings for the Spaniard. However, she wasn’t going to let the opportunity slip through her fingers.

“Pablo, I have something I’ve been meaning to tell you. Before I tell you, I hope we can remain friends afterwards.”

His face dropped. Assuming the worst, he nodded at Y/N’s words, urging her to continue.

“When I first started my internship here, I didn't intend to form such lovely connections with anyone. But since we first met, I’ve found myself liking you more and more; what I’m trying to say is that I like you. A lot.”

Pablo was dumbfounded. Through his shock and disbelief, his heart began to beat faster.

“Are you serious?” Pablo’s mind was running at 100 miles an hour. “I feel the same, I have since I first saw you walk in through the front doors.”

Y/N’s face broke out into a grin.

“I don’t think we can remain friends, though. Pablo commented. “I would like you to be my girlfriend, though?”

Nodding ferociously, Y/N’s smile got impossibly bigger.

The pair moved closer together and Pablo wrapped his arms around Y/N. Just as the pair were settling down, they heard the click of the door handle and then footsteps. Looking up at the sound, they saw Pedri poke his head around the corner.

“I knew it!” He exclaimed, “I’ve been waiting for this moment for ages. You two were made for each other. I’ll finally be rid of Pablo talking about his ‘crush’ on you”

The trio laughed and Y/N and Pablo got up, making their way out of the cupboard.

The three of them headed to the training field, laughing at the unusual events of the morning.

Pablo knew Pedri had locked him and Y/N in the cupboard, but he didn’t feel anger or resentment. Instead, he felt grateful for his friend and appreciative of the road ahead of him.

#pablo gavi x reader #pablo gavi x you #pablo gavi x y/n #pablo gavi #football #fanfiction #fanfic #hot footballers #request #fc barcelona #by ts1m1kas #🧡

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drowninginblox · 1 year ago

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Between a Rock and Moss Place

TW: Fighting in general, accusations of being suicidal, Zoro dealing with the actions of his consequences

"I will never understand you," I confessed while a numbness I knew too well branched up my arm. We've been at this for hours, painstakingly redressing his wounds while a thick silence entangled with tightly loomed thoughts. He ceased his struggle just a few minutes ago when he finally realized there was no way out of there until he was fully healed. "Join the club sister." He snickered under a sinister growl. I rolled my eyes. "You know, I've seen far scarier than you."

"I highly doubt that." He countered through a doubt-filled glance. But rather than give in to his curiosity, I continued in my work. He eventually noticed my lack of an explanation while I reached over for a new roll of bandages. It's been- god- not even a day? "And you're already itching for a fight," The thought slipped through a huff I thought was quiet enough. "Not a fight. I know my limits-" Again, he tried to defend his bruised pride from the slab but all I could do was fail in holding back my bitter laughter. Whether it be out of rage or fear, the bandages and scissors I held were slammed onto a nearby table. "Do you now? Was that before or after you got your ass handed to you what was his title again? Oh right, the strongest swordsman in the world, Zoro. Honestly." The moss head tried to get up, the searing pain that coursed through his chest kept him down though. "Y/n, It is my dream-"

"I know! To be the world's greatest swordsman! I know that Zoro. But, god damn it. You have to be alive to do it." A crass laugh swept through the heavy air. "Tell that to Gold Rodger," I glared daggers at him, getting up from my station to grab a bottle of alcohol spared for disinfecting. At least, that was what it was supposed to be for. Opening it was easier with all the rage. "Gold Redger's dream was to have a legacy. To be king of the pirates. You don't need to live long enough to see it happen. You just need to make an impression." With that, I dared to down whatever was in the bottle. Its rancid taste reminded me of nail polish remover and the smell made my eyes water as soon as it wafted through my nostrils. But that didn't stop me from dedicating myself. This conversation isn't something I planned on having, but Zoro can die. Especially not by biting off more than he can chew. Regardless of how big that stupid mouth can be. "So I haven't left an impression on you?" Speaking off.

Zoro's voice barely made it, but the ghost of his intention was obvious regardless of how quiet he meant to be. A tired sigh broke through my bitterness. "Zoro, I couldn't forget you even if I tried." He scoffs. His rebuttal slithered up his throat, bathing itself in something I hadn't heard out of him yet. At least, not directed at me. "Nice acting. You should go professional." I take another sip, this time staring into his eyes. Something was building behind them at the fact that I wouldn't share with him while he was in this state. I couldn't tell what it was though. He didn't give me enough time to properly ponder what it was before he turned over to stare out that small port window. "Are you done yet?"

When I made my way back to him, I leaned over his slab of bed just to see for myself if it was a struggle to look at me. I like to think it was. It looks like it was a battle to focus on those ever-changing waves. "That depends. Are you?" His eyes narrowed while his Adam's apple swallowed down what could only be assumed to be a bark for me to back off. "What put that stick up your ass y/n?" I bit the inside of my mouth at that. But that sweltering pain didn't stop you from banging a fist against his bed, making the damn thing almost capsize in the process. "What the hell is wrong with you?!"

"You! You asshat!" I didn't mean to shout as loud as I did. "Ever since you decided that you'd die to a master swordsman than to admit that you're not all you're chalked up to be!" The silence that followed was telling enough. I didn't need to see that stupid, blank face Zoro puts on when tensions are high. But he still bothered to egg me on. "What's that supposed to mean?" And he knew I always took the bait too. "You heard me, just before we picked up Sanji, you heard me talking to Luffy about what I think of y'all. And I was honest. Even after I realized that someone was eavesdropping on us, I was honest."

"Oi y/n! Why don't you join us when we dock this time?" It was dark. I like to think that I was reacquainting myself with the ship after years of only seeing it from my apartment and in my dreams of running around with Usopp when we were children. Knowing him, he probably knew this ship front to back. I didn't expect to see Luffy up this late. Considering his child-like demeanor, I'd thought that he'd comedically pass out at 8:30 on the berry like any other child. "Oh hey, Captain! After everything that happened over on 'Syrup? Consider it a no. 'Sides, someone has to watch the ship while y'all are dinkin' around. Rev the engines to ready our escape ykno?" I say, mimicking a motorcycle in the process. He keeps quiet, cocking his head to prove that he has no idea what I was talking about. "Eh, never mind. But seriously though, I'd rather stay here. Get some alone time from..." I didn't know what to call them yet. Crewmates would be the best answer but being official isn't Luffy's style. So what would've been good enough to call these guys? Not-

"Our friends? Why'd you want that?" Beat to the brunt. Even though Luffy didn't seem like the type to, he can rip the band-aid off pretty well without even knowing it. "Well, Luffy, it's nothing against you or them. I just, I don't see them as friends yet." Even in the dark, I could see him slouch at that disappointing truth bomb. "It's not that I don't like y'all. I just, don't know you that well." Luffy huffed like a child, making me smile. "Well, then why did you join the crew?" I sighed. Part of it was Ussop, Kaya and I knew too well he needed a grounder and Kaya was in no state to leave her home. Not even for him when her health was so poor. Another was Luffy. The genuineness, the optimism, it screamed like a bad idea but when he asked both Usopp and me, god damn it. But, if I were being really honest with myself, "Regardless of what everyone else says, Luffy, you're a really good judge of character. And you read me." He smiles slightly at that. "But, even though I don't what you see in me to offer up a place, I wanna make it worthwhile." I leaned up against the railing of the ship. "I never liked disappointing people. 'Especially not the ones who matter."

"How am I one?" I smiled. "You just... I don't know how to describe it other than... You're like raw hope Luffy. I haven't even known you a week and I can see that." I straightened slightly. "I've met and seen a lot of sailors and pirates, you're unlike any other I've experienced." I could feel his smile. Even in the cool darkness, the air seemed to warm with it. "Okay, but what about them? What do you think of the others?" I don't remember what was going through my mind initially but my immediate reaction was to sigh. "Okay, well, going off the top of my head... Usopp may be a coward and prophetic liar, but he's good. Like, good good. The type of good that everyone is born with but not everyone actively chooses to be. And yes, he does bad things. He's a liar," my right-hand grazes over the railing of The 'Merry, momentarily admiring the polish of the painted wood. "..but he always tries to do what's right. Even when he's scared out of his mind." I smiled. "He's one of the realist people I know." Luffy took after me and leaned against the rail, but rather than face the sea, he positioned himself to face the deck. But his eyes remain on me. "Now Nami, I want to know her. But I just don't. And you and I both know that she can be scary-" out of habit, Luffy tensed as if bracing for a blow to the head. "You don't need to tell me twice." I laughed for a moment before regaining myself. "I think she's hiding something Luffy. Granted, It's not my place to pry," He nodded in agreement. "but I'm worried for her. She seems strong on her own, but there's always strength in numbers y'know?" He shrugged, his posture returning to being loose. "Do you think she's made a deal with someone or something? Like a monster?" At that point I didn't think I knew what he was saying so I just laughed at it and went along with the joke. "Yeah. Totally sold her soul to the devil." I concluded intermixed with a chuckle. Luffy's gaze turned back to the door leading below deck for a few moments before he returned to me. "What about Zoro?"

I didn't mean to tense up when he asked. There wasn't a reason to, it was just Zoro after all. We were amicable both on and offshore. "I... I don't know what to say about him." I didn't notice Luffy was leaning over my shoulder until I could feel his cheek squished into mine. "What do you mean?" he whispered just before I shoved him away with a hearty laugh. "Look, I just... I don't know what to say okay?" Luffy steadies himself on the railing again before properly standing. "Do you think he's boring or something?" I will admit, I took some time to consider it. But that didn't change my answer. "Yeah? I think so. I mean, swords can only be so much of someone's personality though so I may be just missing something or-" Luffy's laughter interrupted me before I could properly explain myself. "Hey! C'mon, man!" From the corner of my eye, I could've sworn I saw a light. Not a lantern or anything, probably a candle with how dim it was, but just as soon I saw it, it was gone. It wasn't until Luffy called out for me to get to bed, that I noticed the door leading to the upper floor from the mast was slightly ajar. I didn't think about it much at the time but,

"But you keep on putting up this 'Master Swordsman' front but you aren't there!" I continued. The anger from before kept building and building from my feet to my chest. "Of course, I'm not!" Only grew hotter and harder to control with every acknowledgment I gave him. "Then why did you walk in front of one of the deadliest people in the world and tell him to make you into a pincushion?! What is wrong with you Zoro? Are you suicidal?" For some fucking reason, this time he managed to get up, using his elbows to prop himself up rather than relying on his core muscles. "Of course not!" My throat tightened just as I screamed the loudest I had ever been in my entire life. "Then what is it? Why are you so careless with your life?!"

"Because I have to be strong enough!" He screams, tears threatening to spill from his face. "Because I have to! I was the first person Luffy asked for, that makes me the first person he looks to! If I'm not strong enough for him, for this crew," He opened his mouth but closed it just as soon as he realized. Instead, he took the moment to breathe and level out his voice. "Y/n, I have to be strong enough to achieve both my dream, and to be the person Luffy can rely on when he achieves his." Through his defense, I realized just how emotional I got and whipped the tears I had away. "You wouldn't understand." He eventually concluded before he turned back to his damned window.

"No! Of course, I wouldn't understand. How could I? How could I- the "weakest bitch" on the crew, not understand about getting stronger? Rather, how could I understand the complexities around being relied on?" He turned back to me. "No, don't bother Zoro. Clearly, I wouldn't understand your constant and tedious struggle. Absolutely none of us can!" I declared while I motioned my arms above my head to the main deck above us. "y/n-" I don't bother to hear him out. I was on a roll anyway. "Not me, not Sanji, not Ussop, not Nami, no! None of us know the struggles of the master swordsman Roronora Zoro!"

Part 2

#opla zoro x reader #zoro x reader #live action zoro x reader #opla #one piece zoro #one piece #x reader #haha angst #roronoa zoro #i love #putting men in their place #<3

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7ndipity · 1 year ago

Text

When Your Relationship Gets

Revealed

Taehyung x Idol Reader

Summary: You and Tae discuss what to do when a video of you together is leaked. Can be read as a prequel to "Try Again" or on its own.

Warnings: angst, mentions of harassment and toxic fans, not proofread

A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! This went a little more angsty than I originally planned, but I couldn't really help it. This is really starting to turn into a full Idol!Au series, and I can't say I hate it tbh.

Masterlist

Requests are open

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

You were faintly aware of a low, persistent buzzing, slowly being pulling you away from sleep by what you gradually recognized as your phone on the bedside table.

Groggily, you rolled and unlocked the device, wincing at the bright glow of the screen, only to be met with multiple notifications and missed calls from your manager and several friends.

Confused, you tapped on one of the most recent messages, which included a video link. As soon as you opened the video, you felt your heart falter to stop before taking off again at breakneck speed.

The video was of you and Tae walking through the park earlier that night, him swinging your joined hands playfully and making you laugh before pulling you to him in a tight embrace. Your faces were hidden due to how dark it was and the fact that you both had on masks, but anyone who knew you both could recognize you easily enough if they tried.

"Tae." You nudged the sleeping form next to you, but received no response. "Tae!" You shoved him a little more forcefully.

"Ow! What? What's wrong?" He whined sleepily, turning over to face you.

"Somebody saw us." You said, handing him the phone as the video played on loop.

He stared at the screen for moment, before passing the phone back to you.

"It's not that bad, we can just ignore it if you wanna." He said, trying to soothe your nerves as he had when this had happened previously.

But that was part of the problem, this had happened, several times, and was continuing to happen with increasing frequency. But every time, the two of you had chosen to brush it off or ignore it, Tae saying it was easier that way, but you were becoming less sure.

"What if I don't want to ignore it?" You asked hesitantly.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"This is the third time this has happened this year, Tae, there's only so many times we can lie before people catch on." You explained. "I don't know, I'm just wondering if maybe it would be better to just say something. At least then, we wouldn't have to sneak around so much."

You glanced over at him, but he was staring down at the bedspread, silently. His lack of response causing a weight in your stomach to drop.

"Do-do you not want people to know we're together?" You asked in a small voice, afraid to vocalize the nagging fear that been brewing in your mind.

"No! I mean, that's not it." He scrambled to find the right words to express himself. "It's not that I don't want to tell people, I do, it's just... I'm afraid." He confessed.

"Of what?" You asked.

"You know what some people are like, how they attack and tear down Idols partners." He said, casting his gaze down again. "I don't want you to have to go through any of that."

You knew what he was referring to, you'd both seen too many friends and labelmates go through hell just for admitting they were dating someone, both online and in person. You understood his fear, but he seemed to be forgetting the scrutiny you lived under everyday already as an Idol.

"Tae, I'm already dealing with things like that, people already say things about me. It comes with the territory, unfortunately."

"You never talk about that." He said, looking up at you with big eyes.

"Because I know they only have power if I let them." You said, grasping his hand

"I don't know if I can protect you." He said quietly.

"You don't have to protect me from everything, we're supposed to take care each other, remember?"

He nodded. "So what do we do?"

"We'll figure something out, but whatever we decide, whether that's telling or not, we'll do together, alright?"

"Yeah, alright." He said, giving you a shy grin before pulling you a hug, kissing you temple.

"We'll be okay."

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minminyoonjii · 1 year ago

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Hii,how are you ?? I hope you're good :)

Can I ask you to make a part2 of "When you have to share your daddies/Masters ” ot8?? Like their reactions to yn running from home and etc

Take your time,you don't need to write it rn,please take care of yourself bcs its more important and don't overwork yourself too hard ♡♡

❤️Ultimate Masterlist

💜Rules and Guidelines

P1: Rainy Days|P2: Burn|P3: Losing You

🕯Summary: Cause losing me is better than you. Making a decision is hard, and it gets worse when it's on love. But what's the point when the decision is made?

🌹CW

💌 This is a work of fiction, I by all means don't force ship anyone. They have the right to love whomever they want.

🍄Wordcount: 1.7K

Felix gulped, eyes glued to the door, "Did she?" he whispered, biting on the tip of his tongue. Jeongin gave out a weak chuckle, "She'll come back, right?" he asked, looking at his lovers. Seungmin grumbled, "Of course. She has to," he said, blatantly. A frown etched on Jeongin's lips, "Hyung, I'm scared," he whimpered, leaning into Seungmin's open arms. He sighed, "She'll come back to us, Innie. She doesn't have anywhere else to run to," he said, rubbing Jeongin's back.

Changbin scoffed, "Stop being hung up on her, she made her choice," he said, mind still clouded by anger. "A choice you forced upon her," Felix mumbled, looking away. Changbin pressed his tongue against his inner cheek, "If she didn't make it such a big problem, none of this would've happened," he retorted, towering over Felix. "It was a big problem for a reason, hyung! What happened to you?" Felix asked, hurt displayed on his features.

Changbin rubbed the bridge of his nose, "We fell out, Yongbok-ah. We fell out of love," he said, breaking the tension. Jeongin's eyes widened at Changbin's confession, "What? Wasn't she the one we dreamed of?" he asked, feeling his entire relationship cave into his heart. "No," Changbin said, curtly. Anger boiled under Felix's skin, "Then, why? Why the false hope? I thought this was our end game," he said, teeth chattering from the overwhelming feeling of pain washing over him.

"You're too young to understand," Changbin said, making a slip of the tongue at the sight of Felix snap. Felix squinted his eyes at him, "Don't pull the age card, hyung," he growled, linking hands with Jisung and Jeongin. Changbin gulped, "Well, I-." he stuttered, eyes darting between Felix and Chan. "Felix, please," he pleaded, hands trembling. Felix hung his head low, "I can't, hyung. I can't" he said, dragging both Jisung and Jeongin with him out the door.

Changbin looked at Chan, "Hyung did we make the right choices?" he asked, tears brimming his eyes. Chan shook his head, "We were wrong from the start," he said, rubbing his face. "We're sorry for taking more than we can chew," he added, looking at the girl who got entwined with their mess in the first place. She gulped, "It was wrong of you to use me like this, I thought... I don't know what I thought," she whispered, packing her things before calling herself a taxi.

"I hope you don't hurt others like you did to me and her," she said, knowing it was partially her fault. Hyunjin frowned, "I still don't see what the issue was," he said, genuinely not connecting the clues. "Are you kidding?" Seungmin questioned, giving his lover a side glance. Hyunjin lifted his hands, "I mean, there's nothing wrong with falling out of love. Sure, cutting her off by being cold was a dick move but-," he rambled, moving his hands to express himself.

"But nothing," Chan said, making Hyunjin shrink back. Seungmin sighed, slapping his cheeks, "Fuck, we got too greedy," he admitted, laughing dryly. A familiar ringtone rang within the room. "Is that hers?" Hyunjin asked, pointing to the vibrating phone. Changbin furrowed his eyebrows, "She went out in this weather without her phone?" he questioned, worrying crawling up his limbs. Chan's breath hitched, "I have to find her," he whispered, about to leave the room.

Changbin held his shoulders, "We, hyung. We have to find her," he said, following after Chan. Minho sighed, cracking the jolts in his neck, "I'll stay back to look after the kids, they got hurt in our decision too," he said, leaving the room to find the rest. Seungmin hummed, "Okay, I'll call her friends vaguely. Just in case," he said, grabbing his phone. Hyunjin nodded, running after his older lovers, "Fuck, she better be safe," he cursed, getting into the car.

He sighed, leaning to the seat, "Hyung does your chest feel numb?" Hyunjin asked, looking at Changbin. "Yeah," he replied, closing his eyes, bearing the dull pain spreading through his torso. "We lost someone we shouldn't have," Chan said under his breath, eyes glued to the road. Hyunjin frowned, "Do you think she'll ever take us back?" he asked, bringing his arms around himself in a tight hold. Changbin sighed, "I highly doubt it," he said, staring out of the window.

Hyunjin grumbled, "Why did we even bring in a new person?" he whispered, tucking his face between his knees. Chan smiled weakly, "Love felt comfortable and we got scared of that," he said, knowing fully well where they went wrong. "It's pouring hard and I don't think she took an umbrella with her," Changbin whispered, looking at the storming clouds. Hyunjin pursed his lips, "Hyung, did we fall out of love or were we convincing ourselves that we did?" he asked, looking at Chan through the middle mirror.

"That's a question I'm afraid to acknowledge, Hyunjinnie," he said, staring ahead. Hyunjin frowned, "I don't know how to forgive myself after today," he whispered, tightening his hold around himself. "Am I a bad person, hyung?" he added, voice cracking as he spoke. Chan gulped, "Listen, good or bad. If you're feeling remorse, that shows you have empathy," he said, stopping at a red light. "What if the worst happened to her?" Changbin mumbled, thoughts spiralling.

Chan shook his head, "We're not going to take that into account," he said, hoping it would ease Changbin's worry. "The expressions, Yongbok-ah, Jeonginnie and Hannie showed us tore my heart apart, hyung," Changbin whimpered, gripping his chest. Chan tilted his head back, blinking his tears away, "I know, Bin-ah. I know," he whispered, gripping the steering wheel tight. Hyunjin perked his head up, "It's her favourite convenience store, do you think she could be there?" he asked.

Chan shrugged, pulling up to the brightly flashing neon board, "We could check," he said, turning off his car before entering. "Excuse me? Did a girl with a plush happen to enter here recently?" he asked, looking at the worker. "Not that I can recall. Would you like to have a look at the cameras?" the workers suggested, looking at their worried expressions. Chan nodded, "Thank you so much," he said, about to follow the worker behind when Changbin shouted from outside.

"Hyung, we found something!" he yelled, holding something brown in his palm. "No," Chan whispered, looking at your plush drenched in mud. Hyunjin gulped, "She's gone isn't she?" he whispered. thoughts racing in tandem with his quickened heartbeat. Changbin frowned, noticing the bridge behind them when he squinted through the rain, "No, no! She, no! " he exclaimed looking away from when he noticed. Chan panicked, "What? What is it?" he asked, holding Changbin's shoulders.

"The bridge," he whispered, pointing behind him. Hyunjin giggled, "She's alive. She has to be. Her plush just slipped, she's not dead," he said, pushing his hair away from his face. The silence between his older lovers made his heart drop, "Hyung, she's not dead, right? She wouldn't take her own life like this! She hates the cold, she would never, right?" he yelled, choking on a sob. Chan's hands shook, "Right, right. We're making it seem like the worst. Her plush probably dropped and she didn't realize it," he said, hoping to rationalize.

Changbin looked down at your plush, "It's her favourite plush, hyung. She had it longer than she's known us. How?" he asked, feeling his throat tighten up. Chan clenched his palms, "I don't know! I don't know," he cried, covering his mouth.

Felix sniffled, calling his sister, "Via, has bunny contacted you recently?" he asked, gripping his phone hard. Olivia tilted her head, "Not recently. Why? Is something wrong?" she asked, hearing the faint sniffles on the other end. Felix gulped, "Could you check up with Hannah or Rachel if she's with them?" he asked, hoping his sister would get something that could ease his aching heart. Olivia furrowed her eyebrows, "Weird request but I don't see why not. You better explain yourself after though, oppa," she said, a worried smile etched on her lips.

"I will, I will. Thank you," he said, hanging the phone up. Jisung held Felix close, "She'll be alright, Lix," he mumbled, kissing Felix's temple. "How about we look for a gift box with all her favourite things?" Minho proposed, hoping to distract his younger lovers from the current distress. Jeongin huffed his cheeks, "Will she accept it?" he mumbled. "Well, if we hand it to Olivia and ask her to hand it over, she just might," Minho reassured, ruffling Jeongin's hair.

A buzz echoed within the silent room, 'She's having a girl's night with Hannah but for some reason, she told me not to tell anyone. So you better not leak this, even to your lovers, Lee Yongbok,' Olivia texted. Felix smiled, sending heart stickers back to his sister, "She's safe," he said, feeling relieved. Jeongin's eyes widened, "Really, hyung?" he asked, looking at Felix. "Yeah, she's alright. For her location though, I don't know," he lied, displaying a frown on his lips.

The front door swung open, "We found this," Changbin croaked, lifting the plush. Seungmin ran down the stairs, "Where was it?" he asked, looking at them. A shiver ran down Chan's spine, "In front of the convenience store, before the bridge," he said, hands still shaking. Hyunjin gulped, "We lost here, I don't think she jumped but, fuck, I-I can't help but imagine," he stuttered, walking into the house. Felix hesitated to tell them the truth, "She's alright. I asked around and she's fine. However, I don't know where she is." he admitted, taking a deep sigh.

Hyunjin dropped to his knees, "Oh, thank god," he breathed out. Changbin gulped, "I want to find her now, knowing she's alright," he whispered, biting his bottom lip. Chan shook his head, "Let's give her some time," he said, pulling a chair out at the dining table. "Hyung's right, plus it's already late," Felix agreed, stretching his tense body. Minho hummed, "Come on boys, clean up and go to bed," he said, shooing them up the stairs. "Hyung that includes you," he added looking at Chan.

"I know, Min. I just need to piece myself together alone for a bit," he whispered, holding his head. Minho frowned, "Alright hyung, just remember that we'll be right here. One door away, okay?" he reassured, kissing Chan's kiss. "Thanks, Min," Chan whispered, looking at Minho with his tired eyes. Minho chuckled, "Yeah, yeah. Don't push yourself too hard, hyung. Not everything was your fault," he said, turning off the lights behind him. Chan sighed, "I'm so sorry," he said, whispering into the empty room. "Love shows itself through people in many ways, and in certain cases, the love you hold for yourself is the strongest." "Love is also horrific, however by fearing love you're not only hurting yourself but those around you."

That's the 'Moral Of The Story'

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vanishingstarrs · 5 days ago

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masterlist

katsuki bakugo

playing house

after getting you sick, you boyfriend makes it his personal mission to take care of you, and you can’t help picture what living together would be like due to the domesticity of it all

this is me trying

your day at work was less than ideal, your confidence took a significant blow by the end of your meeting, and yet somehow your boyfriend always has all the right words to cheer you up

try again

just because you asked for permission to use his given name didn’t mean you were quite ready to actually use it, nor were you ready to accept the implications that came with it either

midnight haze | midnight dreams | midnight rain | one more night

fear and anxiety bring on a new bout of insomnia, and you weren’t the only one, it just so happens that three nights later… baking, binging, and bakugo were the only things soothing enough to get you back into bed after midnight

twenty something

you were never too big on birthdays, it was just another day, or at least it was up until your new boyfriend entered your life, he made it his goal to show you everything you were missing, spoiling you and reminding you just how much you deserved

pancakes for dinner

coming home from a tiresome day at the hospital required an immediate nap, you weren’t expecting to wake up to get lavished in the best way by your pro hero boyfriend

sweet treat thief ( smau )

the cookie jar was empty and you were going to get to the bottom of why your boyfriend hadn’t made a replacement, those were the rules, after all, whoever had the last desert baked the next batch for the tin, you happened to be blind

inspiration strikes once your relationship comes to the light and your fans are upset with your taste in men, you might just have to take to music to explain why you owe no explanation

eijiro kirishima

box hair dye

self doubt clouds his decision making, but your boyfriend thinks it’s time for a change of hair, and you decide dyeing yours along with him might make the transition a bit easier

decode

a secret admirer? in retrospect, romantic, but after a while it becomes frustrating when they won’t reveal their true self, so you gather your friends to plot a way to unravel the mystery

anything for you

your boyfriend was one of the most emotionally intuitive people you knew, he somehow always managed to lift your spirits and put a smile on your face when you were down

always been you

how much more obvious could you be? when your crush takes it upon himself to assume you like his best friend, you’re left with no choice but to spell it out how much you liked him

izuku midoriya

coming soon

shoto todoroki

coming soon

denki kaminari

electric touch

the boy you liked wasn’t the smartest, not for lack of trying, but he was definitely a little more gullible than the average person, luckily his lack of smarts landed you a confession

hanta sero

strange you never knew

when your date cancels on you last minute, your best friend takes it upon himself to not only be your stand in to the pumpkin patch, but to also make this your best date yet…

shota aizawa

you’re my weakness ( smau )

the legal side of things are finally taken care of, and eri is free to finally settle into your home, the adjustment period is easier than you thought it’d be because your husband can’t say no

keigo takami

wish on an eyelash | 11:11, make a wish

he’s a hopeless romantic and loves finding beauty in all of the little things, wishes made with coins tossed into fountains, on shooting stars across an inky sky, blowing the dandelions into the wind, lucky time, and eyelashes over your shoulder, their rules were sacred and so was the love granted by your wish

touya todoroki

coming soon

#bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #bnha masterlist #mha masterlist #masterlist #ʕ•́ᴥ•̀ʔっ #vanishingstarrs

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an-ambivalent · 1 year ago

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I thought of this scenario... 😳🙃 So um anyway... Back on my uchiha bullshit.

Warning: yandere content and themes of abuse. Read at your own discretion. I do not condone this behaviour in real life.

Imagine one of those medieval european settings from any villianess/isekai manhwa you've read. The royal family (the Uchihas) are tyrannical rulers, particularly the current monarch Fugaku Uchiha. There's no room for error, people are easily beheaded left and right for the tiniest mistake or "disrespect" against the Uchiha family.

Itachi understood his family dynamics. So, he adapted quickly and knew how to behave and navigate his family complex situations to not get on his father's bad side. Despite whatever he believed, he did whatever Fugaku expected him to do to not face his father's wrath. But, Sasuke on the other hand... He's always been a bit more oblivious from a young age.

He lived a sheltered life. His mother already lost her first son to Fugaku, she didn't want to repeat the same mistakes so she kept him more isolated and protected. It didn't matter because Fugaku ignored his youngest son anyway. He only cared for his heir, Itachi.

Raised in his own little bubble, there were only few people Sasuke interacted with: his mum, his nanny, and his nanny's daughter and his only playmate: you. There wasn't much else for a long time, just sweet innocent childhood memories. That's until he reaches a certain age and starts noticing the difference between his brother's status and his own, and his own father never even speaks to him. He wants to start seeking out his father and yearns for his approval.

There have been something different about Itachi lately. Fugaku knows he's losing his control on his son. There's not much he can do until he notices his second son lingering around. Its perfect because Sasuke is seeking his approval and Fugaku needs to restart his training for a new puppet.

The tyrannical monarch, when seeking out his second son for the first time, witnesses the most appaling his scene. His son, a royal prince is confessing to you, a mere servant's child, a commoner. That's not the worst part: how dare you, a filthy peasant, dare to reject his son?! Who did you think you were?!

That scene is enough to show how lacking Sasuke's education has been under his incompetent mother. The most pretegious family, Uchiha, they don't ask. They take what they want, when they want it.

And then before anything could happen, both you and Sasuke are captured by the imperial guards. You're terrified. You've heard countless of stories about how ruthless the Emperor is. You knew that with your status, death awaited you. For Sasuke, despite whatever his harsh punishment, his royal status would protect his life.

You cried out in pain as the knights pinned you to the ground. The concrete dug into your skin, causing painful abrasions, and you felt blood gushing out of your forehead.

Sasuke cried out in panic at seeing your situation. "Father please! Stop-"

"Insolent child! No child of mine will be ever at a peasant's mercy! Clearly, your education has been lacking. I've been too lenient with my dear wife. It's about time I take you under my wing.

"You're not going to be like Itachi, I'll make sure of it. I'm going to teach you how to take things for yourself and keep them for yourself."

Fugaku loomed over Sasuke; the young boy wept in fear, with tears at the corner of his eyes, and legs shaking.

"Do you want her?"

"W-what?"

Fugaku clicked his tongue and his glared hardened. "Don't make me repeat myself boy, I will make you regret it. You confessed to her. Do you want her?"

"Y-Yes."

"Then you will have her. No child of mine will be denied anything, especially not from a peasant. You're going to keep her and learn how to take what you want and keep everything under your control." He said, grinning widely.

You could do nothing but tremble in fear knowing that you were going to be nothing but become a possession for another future tyrannical monarch.

#yandere x reader #Sasuke x reader #Yandere sasuke #Yandere scenarios #Naruto x reader #Yandere imagines #Uchiha x reader #Yandere uchiha #Ambivalent writes #Yandere naruto

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baby-xemnas · 3 months ago

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🐯🐻‍❄️ big big love (sort of a draft i want to make into a comic but itll take so long im scared)

pre rship lawbepo - the thought that the boys could suggest law gets into a relationship - ofc while joking that theyd be sad to share captains time with a woman, but it cant be helped! - bepo overhearing and getting upset....ofc law dismisses it, but it still hurts

does captain need a romantic relationship? would it make him happier, does he feel incomplete? its awfully selfish to not want it to happen then ..but where does that leave HIM - bepo chan spiraling into those thoughts... he knew that maybe one day his friendship wont be enough but he couldn't prepare for such a day to come

it would be cute if he didn't even consider himself as a viable sexual partner. they are different races, captain is not gay etc...maybe he rubbed off to a thought of what it would be like to be a cute girl being fucked by law 😳 oh bepo...his thought going there because of logic - okay im a human, and captain is a man, so he would be into a human female, what would that be like? and getting SO embarrassed so quickly because while he knows little about human romance he does know how things work (and how women act around their love interests in literature) so projecting onto that making his head explode. bepo doesnt have time to analyze how he feels he just panics, overwhelmed by the idea and after surprise subsides getting real upset that he is not in fact a human woman...

little did he know that not only its possible but law wants him BADLY. bepo darling he thinks about bending you over and spreading those furry cheeks So Much that if you'd know you would die of embarrassment.

physically it makes no sense cuz hes so big but i love light weight bepo - maybe its the lack of exposure cuz he drinks rarely. but imagine him confessing awkwardly like "haha if i was a human girl i could date captain and never let any other girls near him! 😖" much to 😦😦😦 from the other 3

penshachi: gtg bye (theyll later come back to not find neither law nor bepo cuz theyve gotten back to polar tang to make out in laws cabin. under the guise of "bepo you drank too much we have to go" and when law grabs his hand bepo cant do anything

law is so excited he can barely think straight cuz he only said he doesn't care much for women or human women, trying not to foam at the mouth at the chance with bepo that fell into his lap.

But its an uphill battle how to delicately explain to Bepo that not only Law wants him as he is (male and mink and all) he is the ONLY person he wants. imagine the pressure and fear that he simply misunderstood bepo.

imagine their walk back to the ship from the bar - bepo still tipsy but sobering up from fear because atmosphere got real weird once he said what he said ...and the boys left so they cant even get captain distracted. its just him.

bepo walks behind silent law and anxiety keeps bubbling up to the point bepo starts tearing up because hes not sober so emotions are extra hard to contain and he is so afraid that he ruined everything and what he said will break their relationship now that law knows how he feels. he made it weird and now law hates him 😭

law turning around after he hears bepo sniffle and ofc he puts two and two together

-bepo im not mad or grossed out

-whuh?? 🥺😭

-you dont need to be a girl to keep women away from me you know

-huh??? (at that point bepo is so drowned in worry he forgot what he said)

-you....[sigh] bepo calm down

-sorry...

-if you were a girl you would be my lover?

-dont say it like that captain im sorry its stupid i shouldn't have said it!! 😭😭

-but cant you do it now?

-do what?

-be that

-what, a girl??

-(law closing his eyes in frustration not wanting to call bepo stupid even tho he's being VERY stupid right now) my lover, bepo, it would make me happy if you were my lover now, as you are, you dont need to be a human woman for that

[cue bepo's whole would breaking to the point he almost faints]

#looking at my drafts idr if i posted it #sorry if i did #talk tag #lawbepo

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arlana-likes-to-write · 1 year ago

Text

Lightning Bug - Chapter 21

Masterlist

Warning: panic attack, nightmare, mention of past turture, trauma dump, religious abuse, mention of murder, protective avengers

Word count: 5.1k (we are less than 3,000 words from this fic being over 100,000 words)

Wanda enjoyed this alone time as she mediated with her thoughts and how things in her life were changing. Sometimes her thoughts scarred and worried her. At times they were dark and depressing but she knew there was light at the end of the tunnel. The witch smiled. “I know your there,” she said. Her accent was thicker when she was in this state. Wanda opened her eyes and saw Vision standing in the doorway. He looked worried and conflicted. “What’s wrong?” She asked as her feet touched the ground.

“It’s difficult to explain.”

“Try,” Wanda said. The android sighed, closing the door and sitting down in the empty chair.

“Miss. Y/n and I played a game of chess last night and she seemed rather upset,” Wanda frowned. She must have not gone back to bed once they left her. “We talked a bit and when she was going back to bed she asked if she could touch the mind stone and I let her.”

“You did what?” Wanda questioned in disbelief.

“I know it was incredibly irresponsible -”

“It could have killed her!” She knew her eyes flashed a hit of red but Vision remained calm. Gods, he was one of the smartest individual in the tower but he lacked such common sense.

“But it didn’t,” he folded his hands. “Similar to how it didn’t kill you or your brother when you came into contact with it.” He was right. It didn’t kill them but it changed them. “I know it was wrong of me to do but she trusted me enough. Doesn’t that say something?” Wanda nodded, taking a calming breath.

“What happened?” She asked and pulled up a chair to sit down with him.

“That’s why I wanted to talk to you,” he said. “I do no know. She touched the stone and normally I can know what occurred similar to when you touch it. But I felt nothing. It was as if the stone didn’t want me to see what it showed her,” Wanda’s frown deepened. “I asked what she saw but she claimed she saw nothing.”

“Is she in danger?” Wanda asked. She would do anything to keep the young girl safe.

“I don’t know,” Vision admitted. “But something is coming and I fear our young friend may be caught in the cross fire. Maybe if you can get her to confess what she saw in the mind realm it could give us a clue on how to protect her.”

“What is happening?” Wanda asked as she stepped out of the elevator. Her head was spinning with Vision’s warning. She made him promise to keep it between them until they could get more information. It was unnecessary to worry the team if they weren’t sure something was coming. During the elevator ride up to her floor, she tossed around the idea of telling Natasha. She wasn’t sure yet. She was in need of a cold shower to clear her head but she saw Kate with scissors in her hand about to cut Y/n’s hair. The archer froze, smiling as if she got caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

“She wanted a hair cut and no on that was qualified enough to cut hair was around,” Kate explained. “So here we are.” Wanda crossed her arms with an amused smile on her face.

“And you couldn’t wait for someone?” The young girl giggled.

“I did suggest that,” Kate defended. “But it’s very hard to say no to that face especially when she gives you puppy dog eyes.” The eyes in questioned locked onto her green ones. They were so much brighter compared to when she first saw that girl on the side of the road. Wanda promised herself to never let that light go out. With a sigh, she walked over the duo.

“Give me the scissors,” Kate sighed in relief and handed them over to Wanda.

“A life savor,” The archer praised. “Truly a life savor. I owe you a great debt Wanda Maximoff,” the witch rolled her eyes and stood behind the girl. “Now I have to go call Clint. See ya.”

“Bye Kate,” Y/n waved. “Tell everyone I say hi!” The archer gave a salute and headed off towards her room.

“So,” Wanda said, gently brushing her hair. It was freshly washed and it came down to the middle of her back. “Why do you want to cut your hair?” Wanda watched the girl’s shoulders move up and down.

“Never liked my hair long,” she began. “But no one would cut it when I was growing up and I didn’t really let people touch me to cut it,” she sighed. “I remember finding kid scissors in my brother’s room and I tried to cut it myself,” her body shook as she laughed. “Didn’t go well as you can imagine.” Wanda smiled as she set the brush down. “I was grounded for 2 weeks because of the mess I made,” her voice got soft. “I still have the scar on my shoulder where my father grabbed me and threw me into the wall.” Anger bubbled in Wanda’s chest. It was a mystery to her on how a father could hurt his child. She pushed the feeling down.

“How short are we thinking?” Wanda asked, changing the direction of the conversation.

“Maybe to my shoulders and we can go from there.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Wanda began to cut the long hair that was desperately need of a good cut. She wondered why her or Natasha didn’t suggest this to the teen earlier. Were there other things they were neglecting? “Vision told me that you and he played chest last night,” Wanda said. “Could you not fall asleep after your nightmare?” The teen shook her head. “Keep your head still,” the witch giggled.

“Sorry,” she said and Wanda could hear the smile in her voice. “I tried to,” she continued. “The room felt to small so I walked around the tower and found Vision. I like him. There is something abut him that makes me feel safe,” Wanda understood that feeling. He helped her overcome her grief of losing her brother and her actions in Laos.

“How are you feeling?” It took a minute for the girl to answer as she did a mental category of everything.

“Good, just a little tired and I have a headache but Kate gave me something for that.” The problem was Wanda felt the girl’s honestly and what worried her more was she wasn’t holding anything back. Wanda’s frown deepened. “Are you mad at Vision because he let me touch the mind stone?” The witch sighed.

“No, honey, but it was very dangerous and you could have gotten hurt.” The girl twisted around in the chair to face her.

“I didn’t see anything,” she said. “I promise. If I did I would tell you,” Wanda smiled.

“It’s okay, I believe you. Now,” she gently turned the teen forward. “Stop moving so I can finish cutting your hair.” The witch believed her. She felt no dishonestly in her words or in her mind. Whatever she saw or whoever she spoke with made her forget what she saw. That worried Wanda even more.

You didn’t like the feeling of loose hair on your neck so you took a quick shower once Wanda was done. You loved your hair, it was short and easy to manage. So many times people grabbed onto your hair to hold you in place or pull you back. It was nice to be free from that. You hung up the towel when your hair was dry and walked out of your room. “You cut your hair!” America exclaimed when you entered the main area. Her and Yelena were sitting on the couch with Natasha in the kitchen.

“Yeah,” you said, feeling your face flush at the attention. “Do you like it?” She continued to stare at you until Yelena hit her in the stomach.

“Yeah,” she cleared her throat. “It looks good. Yeah, good,” the blonde rolled her eyes and mumbled, ‘Ya Delayu Eto (idiot).’ “What did you just call me?” You giggled and sat down at the kitchen counter.

“Wanda said you asked her to cut your hair,” Natasha said.

“Actually, I asked Kate but Wanda took the scissors from her,” you giggled.

“That is probably for the best,” Yelena said, appearing next to her sister. “She would not have done a good job.” You smiled. Yelena hit her hip against the redhead, you didn’t like the way both of them were looking at you. You raised your eyebrow in question.

“Do you want to join Yelena and I for a walk?” You looked between knowing well they were hiding something.

“Yeah sure,” you said. “Sounds like fun.” You expected them to lead you outside to walk around a park but they lead you to the training area and onto the track. It was surrounded by windows that over locked the city and letting natural light in. You wondered what it would look like in the winter. The Black Widow due walked on either side of you. “So,” you said after you finished the first lap. “Are you going to tell me what you really want to talk about?” Yelena chuckled.

“There is no keeping secrets from this one,” you nodded your eyes.

“Helen suggested that adding exercise can aid in your recovery,” Natasha explained. “Plus I agree with Wanda and I think it’s a good idea to train your abilities so you don’t hurt yourself.”

“Will that make me an Avenger?”

“Do you want to be an Avenger?” You shrugged.

“Not really. Seems like a lot of paperwork.” Yelena laughed.

“You are so right,” she said. “Those mission reports give me nightmares.” Natasha pinched her sister which caused the blonde to yelp. “It’s true! Maria made me redo one 3 times!”

“That’s because you wrote the entire thing in hieroglyphics, then piglatin, and finally English,” Yelena shrugged.

“As Deputy Director she should be well versed in multiple languages,” Natasha shook her head with a sigh. You liked watching the two Black Widows interact with one another. There were moments where you saw Caleb and yourself in them. They desperately wanted to protect one another, it was the same for you. But there were times you wished you and Caleb could be more playful as they were; joking around and teasing with one another. You both were focused on surviving. Sometimes you would sneak into his room and talk and () your laughter so you wouldn’t get caught. You loved those memories. “Natasha talked to Steve and myself, Wanda, or Maria will be helping you train. As well as Nat,” she added. It was a good plan and you felt safe with those people.

“There is more we need to talk about,” you figured as much. “Helen also said there is damage to your hippocampus. There is ways to heal it; exercising being one of them and you need to stop hurting yourself.” You never planned to let it get that bad again. You felt guilty for worrying everyone.

“Hippocampus,” you repeated back to her. “What is that?”

“It’s part of your brain that helps with memory,” Yelena answered. “Have you been experiencing memory loss?” You weren’t sure. There were moments you could remember crystal clear like you were watching a movie. Your memories when you were with HYDRA or living on the streets, there were gaps. Not everything was clear but you chalked it up to your brain protecting you from traumatic events. You nodded. “Those memories may come back,” you frowned, stopping in your tracks. The duo kept walking before stopping when they realized you weren’t following.

“What’s wrong, dorogoy (sweetheart)?” Natasha asked, walking back over to you.

“I don’t want to remember,” you whispered. You didn’t. You wanted to forget all the pain you caused, the blood on your hands, and the screams. The screams were the worst part. “I want to forget all those horrible things they made me do.”

“Who is they?” Natasha knelt in front of you, gently taking your hands in hers. There was a burning feeling to tell them. To come clean and wash away all the hidden secrets. They must know, right? You’ve told them you’ve killed, the your hands have been tainted red with blood. What other organization was in the business of kidnapping people and turning them into weapons? They were waiting for you to tell them, to take that leap of faith.

“HYDRA,” your voice shook. “They took me off the streets, promised me a safe place to sleep and food. I didn’t-” your lips trembled. “I didn’t want to do it.”

“Oh I know,” Natasha cooed, whipping away your tears tat fell. “Your okay,” she promised. “They won’t hurt you, never again.” You believed her and she brought you into a tight hug. You burrowed your face in her shirt, letting more tears fall.

“It’s hard when you start to remember the things you’ve done,” you turned to face the blood, still wrapped in Natasha’s arms. She was leaning against the railing with a frown on her face, starring at her shoes. “It’s like a scab over a cut so you always know it’s there but the cut opens it seems to hurt more than the first time.” Finally, she looked at you. The look in eyes reminded you of that day in the gun range, far off and dazed.

“How do you move on?” You asked softly. She chuckled, looking away. She clicked her tongue to the rood of her mouth.

“Like a scar, it takes time,” you wished she had a different answer.

“But you have us,” your attention went back to the Black Widow. “You are safe here and no matter what happened in your past it won’t change how we see you now.”

“Promise?” You questioned.

“Promise.” Yelena reassured you.

You stayed in your room until dinner, going over what Natasha and Yelena said. You were exhausted and grateful that those around you didn’t force you talk talk, you needed the quiet to decompress. Even Helen’s voice rang in your head, ‘you need to let them in and allow them to shoulder that fear with you.’ Oh but you were so scared to do that. Even with the promise that they wouldn’t look at you differently, you were still scared. So when dinner came around, you didn’t engage in the conversation as they asked Bruce how Wakanda was. Instead, you pushed your food around your plate to lost in your own thoughts. Once dinner was put away, Tony ordered ice cream for everyone. It was suppose to be a fun team bonding experience but the ice cream made your stomach twist as you listened to the team talk and laugh. “Hey,” America whispered, pumping your shoulder against yours. “Are you okay?” You sighed, not meaning it to be loud enough to grab the attention of other other Avengers. You swirled your spoon in your ice cream so the colors were mixed together.

“I,” you sighed again, feeling angry with yourself for not finding the correct words. “I want to tell all of you about what happened to me, if that’s okay?” The mood of the group shifted and you felt a little bad but you needed to do this now before you lost the courage.

“Of course, " Wanda smiled. “Take your time.” You crossed your legs and focused on your ice cream.

“I was born with this ability,” you started. You knew some of them knew that but you thought it was good to start from the beginning. Dropping your spoon, electricity danced around your fingers. “They didn’t surface until I was about 4 but even then my parents made it clear they wanted nothing to do with me,” you took another spoonful of your ice cream, hand shaking slightly. “They didn’t want a second kid and my mother didn’t know she was pregnant until a friend told her. He claimed God spoke to him through a dream and told him of the pregnancy. But I wasn’t going to be a gift, I was going to be a curse. That not even the Devil wanted me.” You heard Natasha scuff. You smiled at the sound, imagining the red head rolled her eyes and Wanda quietly having to tell her to behave. You kept your eyes trained down. “So they kept me a secret, only a trusted few new about me.”

“Why didn’t they give you up for adoption?” ate questioned. It was a good one that you asked yourself all the time.

“I learned quickly that my father enjoyed two things; power and control,” you answered. “There I was a young girl desperate for her father’s love. I did everything I could to get it, no matter how many times he hit me,” you whispered, shaking your head. “Anyways, I accidental shocked my brother. They were furious and locked me in a small room in the basement for 3 days. The only reason I survived was Caleb bring me food and water. He had to be careful too. He was my parents’ favorite but that didn’t always protect him. When they found out I lived, they sent a priest to form an exorcism on me to get the Devil out.”

“You were 4 years old,” you heard the anger in every word Yelena said. You nodded. Your father held you down at the priest performed it. It wasn’t the only one you had to endure but they didn’t need to know that.

“Obviously, it didn’t work,” you chuckled, trying to lighten up the situation. “I remember they made me kneel in the corner and pray to God to save me. I spent hours reading over the bible,” you took another bite of your ice cream. It was melted but it was a good distraction. “That went on for a year or two until they realized I could use my powers to benefit them. I gave power to the church, our home, and those who knew I existed but it was not good enough. Every bad thing that happened I was to blame, someone leaving the church, my father getting into a chair accident, or my brother getting sick. It was all my fault and one day I snapped,” you felt America tangle her hand with your free one, squeezing it tight. You were grateful for it.

“You don’t have to continue, sweetie,” Pepper said. You smiled at the CEO. You were almost done with this section of your story.

“Caleb went to school,” you continued. “And my father wouldn’t stop yelling. I don’t remember why he was upset,” your voice began to shake. “The pressure was building and I couldn’t stop it. It became to much and I let go. I woke up to the house around me was burnt to the ground. First responders were on their way and I ran,” you finally looked up at the Black Widow, seeing nothing but warmth in her eyes. “I learned later they said it was an electrical fire but it was me.” A heavy silence fell among the group, it was Tony that broke it.

“Look I’ll be the first one to say it since we are all thinking it. They got what they deserved,” Pepper gasped, slapping the billionaire.

“Tony! I can not believe you said that!” She shirked. You fought a smile that was forming on your face.

“What? I know we are all thinking it, tell me I’m wrong!” No one said anything. “See my point. Look kid,” he stopped mid sentence. “I have words for wisdom to tell you but I fear my wife so I’ll tell you when we are alone.” You laughed, whipping away a tear that fell.

“What I think Mr. Stark is trying to say,” Vision said. “We are very sorry you had to endure that as a child.”

“Yeah, shit,” Rhodey said. But there was a second half to your story. That was a nice intermission. You finished your melted ice cream, set it on the table, and leaned back onto the couch still holding onto America’s hand. It grounded you.

“To no one’s surprise,” you continued. “I was an easy target on the streets by the other kids, adults, and authorities. I was a quiet kid to afraid to fight back because I didn’t want to hurt anyone. But I survived the best I could then a man approached me,” you looked down at your lap. Sometimes you felt so stupid for trusting him. “He promised me a safe place to sleep, food, and that other ids were going to be there. I went with him.”

“You weren’t stupid for believing he was telling the truth,” Sam said. You shrugged.

“He brought me this black van and he drugged me. When I came to I was in a cell and I found out I was with HYDRA. Very quickly they learned they couldn’t use their normal methods because I could redirect the electricity,” you smiled. “Pop quiz, what is great conductor for electricity?” You looked up, watching the gears turn in Bruce and Tony’s head.

“Water,” the doctor said. You nodded, keeping your eyes on the floor.

“If I didn’t complete the mission, they would fill a tub of water, force me inside,” you looked at Bucky. “And electrify it.” The color drained from this face, making his blue eyes pop. “I tried to redirect it but the onslaught was to much.”

“What did you do for them?” Steve asked.

“Anything they wanted,” you whispered. “I did everything that man told me to. I was his little spark and he was papa,” Bucky licked his lips. “I tortured, killed, and helped reset the Winter Solider,” it was so silent. You feared the could hear the beating of your heart. “Do you remember me?” You asked Bucky. “Because I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to hurt you.” God, you could hear his screams echoing in your head.

“So am I,” Bucky got up suddenly, leaving towards the direction of his room. The others watched the man leave.

“I’d go make sure he’s okay,” you told Steve. “Those few years weren’t kind to us,” the blonde hesitated to leave but you nodded. “It was an endless cycle. He’d hurt me, I’d hurt him, it wasn’t fun.”

“How did you escape?” Natasha asked. You sighed, resting your head on America’s shoulder.

“I did what I do best and burnt the place to the ground,” you said softly. “I made it back to the states and lived on the streets until Natasha found me.” You were exhausted. It was an emotionally charged day.

“Shit,” Sam said. You chuckled at the blunt comment. “Not sure if I want to hug you or hurt everyone that has hurt you.”

“Get in line, Wilson,” you saw the same anger in Natasha’s eyes when you told her about the incident a the Barrera house or when the shop owner put his hand on you. Everyone seemed to share the same look, even Bruce looked upset. You smiled.

“The past is the past,” you said. “Can’t change it. I just have to keep on moving forward.” America squeezed your hand.

“With all of us by your side.” Yeah, you thought, that sounded nice.

“Buck,” Steve said, chasing after the man. “Bucky, hold on.” He finally caught up to him and grabbed onto his arms. He could see that he was on the verge of a panic attack.

“I can’t,” he struggled to say. His blue eyes were wide, frantically looking around. “I can’t be in the same room as her. I-”

“Sh,” Steve cut his boyfriend off. “I need you to breath for me. Can you do that for me?” Bucky hesitated but shook his head. The blonde sprang into action. He brought Bucky to the ground and sat with his back against the wall and Bucky between his legs. With Bucky’s back flushed against his front, he wrapped his arms around him. Steve started to breath, in for 5 and out for 5. Repeat. Repeat, until he felt Bucky’s breathing calm down.

Physical touch was usually never the answer to ground Bucky, especially after a nightmare. Steve learned the hard way when Bucky grabbed him by his throat and wouldn’t let go. But there were expectations to the rule especially when he couldn’t regulate his breathing. Steve rested his head on Bucky’s shoulder. He waited for Bucky to gather his thoughts. “Lately, I’ve found myself starring at her,” he began. “It was my body remembered her but my mind refused to.” Steve hummed, indicating that he was listening. “I almost killed her.” His voice shook.

“You and I both know that wasn’t you,” Steve said. Bucky turned around to face him.

“You don’t understand. When she said they held her down in that tub that was me. God Steve she’s just a kid.”

“And you were tortured and held against your will with no choice but to do those things,” Steve countered. He cupped his boyfriend’s cheeks, drawing circles with his thumb. “Do you blame her for what she did to you?”

“No..” Bucky whispered.

“Then I wish you’d offer yourself the same level of forgiveness,” Steve whipped away tears that fell from his blue eyes. “I can not fathom the guilt you carry, baby, and the path to moving forward is long and messy but you have to remember what you did for them wasn’t your choice. You were trapped,” Steve bit his lip before he could say it was partly on him that HYDRA got to Bucky but this wasn’t about him and Bucky didn’t need to hear about his guilt.

“I don’t know how I’m going to be able to face her.” Steve sighed, dropping his hands.

“I don’t think she blames you, Buck. But if you need time to process everything I’m sure she’ll give you that.” Bucky nodded, chuckling softly.

“What would I do without you, punk,” Steve smiled, kissing his forehead.

“Do you want to go back down or head to bed?” He had a feeling what he would chose but wanted to give him the option.

“Bed,” Steve chuckled, stood up, and pulled his boyfriend to his feet. He kept his hand tightly in his. Sam was right, the tower seemed to attract HYDRA’s puppets. He believed it was because everyone in the tower could help heal them.

You were fighting to keep your eyes opened as you rested on Kate’s lap with a movie playing. It was a Scooby-Doo movie but you were lost on the plot with sleep clouding your mind. Also, Kate running her fingers trough your hair wasn’t helping. But you were scared to fall asleep. You worried what monsters your mind would create. You were powerless to fight it and fell asleep.

On either side of you was a guard as you walked down the familiar hallways. They were armed with assault rifles and military armor with orders to shot on sight if you tried to escape. You weren’t going to escape. Every bone in your body hurt. There was a dark hole growing over your hear; accepting your fate here. They opened a door and pushed you in, not entering with you. Inside was a man, long brown hair and blue eyes. He was strapped to a chair, unable to move and no light in his eyes. The most striking part of his appearance was his one metal arm. “Hi little spark,” he stepped out of the corner. “Come here,” you took a few steps and took his out stretched hand. “This man right is very important to us. You can call him Winter.”

“Winter,” you said slowly but the man didn’t move.

“But even though he’s important to us doesn’t mean he’s free from punishment. Just like you.” you moved you behind Winter where there was a wooden box. “Up you get,” As you stood on the box, he let go of your hand. “Punish him.” He told you. You had a feeling what he wanted you to do but you couldn’t. Maybe he was mistaken. This man could die. Before you could protest, he grabbed your hands and put them on either side of his head. “I won’t ask again.” You nodded, licking your lips and focused your energy to your hands. It was a small electrical discharge, Winter didn’t make a sound. “Stronger,” you obeyed and this time Winter made a small noise. It was no where near your full strength and knew it. He grabbed on your hair and pushed you against the wall.

“Stop wasting my time,” he put his forearm against your throat. It was hard to get air into your lungs. “I will have him kill you, do you understand?” Kill me, you wanted to screamed, I want to die. You wanted this to be over.

“Yes papa,” you whispered and he released you. You sucked in some much needed air and stepped back on top of the box. Placing your hands on the side of his head, you let out a shaky breath. “I’m sorry,” you mumbled and released the electricity. He fought it and you were impressed by that. Soon he couldn’t fight it and he screamed. He screamed and screamed and screamed.

You jerked away and fell onto the floor with a thud. “Jesus Christ,” Kate said. The movie paused. “Are you okay?” You scrambled to your feet, starring at your friends and heart pounding.

“Yeah,” you said, licking your lips. “Yeah, I’m great.” You chuckled. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle everyone.” You felt your hands shake and you placed them behind your back out of view. But Yelena saw. The Black Widow stood up and took your hands in hers. You tensed at the contact, you didn’t want to hurt her.

“A nightmare?” She questioned, sitting you back down on the couch. You nodded. “Do you want to talk about it?” You shook your head. “Okay, then we can sit here until you are okay.”

“I’m fine,” you didn’t believe the lie you told your friends.

“Your shaking,” America whispered. You weren’t even aware you were.

“Oh,” you spoke softly.

“It’s okay, bud. We’ll sit here and watch the movie until you feel better.” You nodded as America continued the movie. As the movie played, the visual affects and funny dialogue helped your body relax. But in the back of your mind, all you felt was fear.

When your body stopped shaking, you excused yourself to your room. You took a cold shower to wash away the dream and changed into a long sleeve shirt and sleep shorts. But you knew you weren’t going back to sleep. So you sat on your bed with a book in your hands. It was going to be a long night.

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