#his intro is a little bit too cute🥺

[subtle-as-an-earthquake]

So I know this post is pretty overdue and a bit superfluous by this point maybe, but since I am now back home and finally have time to sit down and write down my thoughts about the last few days, I thought I'd still do a recap post of my experience of the Dublin shows (and a bit about my trip to Dublin in general). Just for anyone who might be interested or even just for me to remember everything by!

Having said that though, I don’t actually know how to even begin putting into words what this trip meant to me 🥺 I’ve said this before, but after seeing them in June and thinking that was it for the foreseeable future, getting to see them again so soon, twice, and it being the very last two shows of the tour as well, felt like an incredible opportunity and huge gift and I could not be more grateful for it ❤️

Recap of Dublin shows 3 & 4 and some more pics below the cut!

I flew in from Amsterdam on Tuesday morning with a Dutch friend, and we met up with another friend of mine who flew in from London at the same time (my London friend went with me to Tuesday's gig, and my Amsterdam friend to Thursday's gig)

London friend and I then headed to the 3Arena to queue up outside and it was fucking freezing lmao. But we played ‘guess the Arctic Monkeys song from the intro’ and had a chance to catch up so all in all it wasn’t too bad, and it’s always so much fun being surrounded by fellow arctic monkeys fans who love them enough to queue up for hours in the cold <3

Once we were inside, we legged it to the stage and then spent another two hours trying to defend our (pretty good, very central) spots and trying not to think about the fact that we had to pee, as you do. We happened to be standing next to a group of Dutch speaking girls, and it turned out one of them had also met Miles in Amsterdam recently, at the same signing I’d been at! Such a small world. But they were really lovely so the two hours flew past, and then it was Miles time!!!!! 🥰

And my god, he literally blew everyone away, he was just insanely good as always. My friend was not really a Miles fan before the gig, and then while he was playing, she kept going “holy shit minnie he’s so good??” and I was like “TOLD YOU”, so now she’s a big fan as well, which is honestly very satisfying 😌 There were so many amazing moments during his set, but the one that stayed with me most I’ve already talked about in this post. It was honestly just…. very intense and really hard to explain in a non-shippy way? Even my non-shipper friend was like… hmm ok yes, that seems very significant 🤔

But anyway, Miles rocked the house, and then it was only a short wait until the main show. And while most of it is a blur because I just lose my mind when I see my boys play, I did make sure to really absorb some special moments and things I really wanted to remember. Being able to clearly see Alex’s intense, goofy and beautiful facial expressions, his HANDS, the cute little interactions he had with the rest of the band (giggles with Matt and smiley asides with Jamie and Nick), the moment where Alex made grabby hands at the plushie and then laughed some more when he couldn’t have it, Jamie being an absolute rockstar as always, Nick looking like a total snack (my friend has a giant crush on Nick, understandably so), Matt being a literal drum god (I love seeing him play SO much). Just... incredible 🙌🏻💘

I really wasn’t expecting Miles to join them during that show, so when Alex gave him a shoutout I knew it was just that, but my friend didn’t, so she started hitting me like “he’s coming back!” and I was like “no he’s not”, and he wasn’t unfortunately lmao. The Dutch and Belgian girls next to me were extremely disappointed (they were Milex shippers as well, of course), but I know at least one of them was there on Thursday as well so I love that for her. Other memorable moments were Alex singing the “remember when you used to be a rascal” line followed by “do you remember? I remember” after which I yelled at my friend “Miles used to be a rascal!!!” and then later I found out Miles was actually on that side of the stage 😭😭 Even though I didn’t find out about that until later, I definitely noticed that Alex kept gesturing towards that side of the stage (the Star Treatment intermezzo was wild, I was like, “WHO is he pointing at for the dolls like you and me thing??” And then it turned out to be Miles 🫠

Another thing I noticed was that the average age of the crowd was way lower than I’m used to it being, which my friend explained may have something to do with tiktok? Lmao idk, hut the the standing crowd did mostly consist of younger, shorter girls for some reason lol, so there wasn’t as much jumping as I’d have liked there to be. My friend and I just went for it regardless, even if we were some of the only people going crazy. But you just have to, you know what I mean? Anyway, it was such an incredible show and after it ended, we were just on cloud nine, singing Fluorescent Adolescent with everyone on the Luas going back to town, which is always just such a blast. And then we ended up in Temple Bar where there was more live music as well as about 500 other Arctic Monkeys fans, so that was great fun too 💫

The next day, the three of us went to a tattoo shop where I’d booked an appointment and I got my tattoo which I am EXTREMELY happy with. The tattoo artist was a girl from Brazil and when she asked me about the meaning of my tattoo (I’ll post a pic later) I told her it was an Arctic Monkeys song and the just yelled across the shop to a few other artists and it turned out they’d been at the concert too, so we all geeked out about them while I got my tattoo done lmao, so much fun 😂

Then my London friend unfortunately had to fly back home later that day, so my Amsterdam friend and I ended up in the pub again because that’s what we do. It was just a very average pub with two very average men playing amazing folk music, and when we walked in, I was like “huh that guy looks like Zackery Michael, that’s funny.” And then later I was stood next to him at the bar and heard he was American, so I was like hmmm, and decided to just ask him if he was in fact Zackery Michael. He was like “that is me!” lol (thank god, would’ve been embarrassing if it hadn’t been) so we had a little chat about the fact that we were both in town for Arctic Monkeys but in slightly different capacities lol, and he was just super nice and was happy to take a photo with me, and then I let him get back to his conversation with the three extremely pretty girls he was with 😅

Anyways, so then on Thursday after breakfast we bought some souvenirs and I bought some great Arctic Monkeys mini posters and some other stuff at this lovely little comic book/record store which was playing Humbug, the owner of which told us he also went to see Arctic Monkeys on Tuesday and loved them, so that was another amazing chance meeting 💜 And then it was after 12pm so it was time for whiskey, and then the meeting with the fellow TLSP/Arctic Monkeys/Miles Kane fan bartender happened which I posted about here, which was so lovely and also secretly made me want to believe it was a sign for the show that night 🙈

But I still couldn’t let myself hope or believe TOO much, so I just kept telling my friend “they’re not going to do it and that’s okay” and she was like “sure, whatever you say” 😂 We had seated tickets for this gig, so we were unfortunately much further away than I had been on Tuesday. And also I just don’t like being seated at concerts, let alone an Arctic Monkeys one, but to be honest, the seats were pretty good. Miles once again gave his absolute all and converted not just my Dutch friend as well, but also a lot of the people around us who we overheard saying things like “did you know he was this good??” and checking Miles’s Wikipedia page, which was great to see. And from up on the balcony we could clearly see that the people in the crowd were really singing along and having an amazing time during Miles’s set (COTT was extremely emotional, all the lights were so lovely ✨️) and I just felt so proud of him and happy for him that it was such a roaring success 🥹💖

The roaring success continued for Arctic Monkeys of course, although it was really weird to see so many people go mental for Snap Out Of It and Arabella etc. 😅 But yeah, the people do love AM it seems, which is why the first part of the setlist was pretty much the same as it had been on Tuesday. Hello You was amazing though!! And then after There’d Better Be a Mirrorball, I knew that it was 505 time, and Alex did say ‘Let’s hear it for Miles Kane’. But because it was the same thing he’d said before, I was still convinced Miles wouldn’t come on. AND THEN HE DID 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I absolutely lost my shit, not even kidding. I just started screaming and threw my phone at my poor friend being like “FILM IT” which she did, bless her heart, and uhhh, yeah then I cried throughout the whole performance 😭 And then at the end, the lights went out and I saw their shadows (our shadow puppets <3) coming together so I was like did they hug??? And then I only found out later that evening when I checked tumblr that they in fact did hug and then my night was just completely made (lol, I say my night but I mean my life, obviously)

Do I Wanna Know was a total blur after that of course, but I was back for Body Paint which was absolutely incredible as always. And then they did Big Ideas as the encore and uuhhh yeah I sobbed 🙃 It was SO beautiful, and so special hearing it live with the strings, and SO fucking sad. And then once RU Mine? finished and the lights stayed off, I was like aaahhh we’re getting one more!! And then OF COURSE it was Perfect Sense because Alex is a dramatic bastard, and of course I cried some more. It was stunning and extremely emotional 💔

So then my friend and I went to drown my sorrows (and elation about the Milex reunion) in the pub and we actually had a great time with some fellow AM fans and live music again. I swear it was like all of Dublin was just there for Arctic Monkeys. Unfortunately, we were not in the pub where the boys apparently went ugh, but still, it was fun. And yesterday morning I woke up with a killer hangover so I swore I would not drink anymore, but it was raining so much, so we did end up in the pub again where we got talking to some really cool Irish guys who (surprise) also loved Arctic Monkeys, and they insisted on buying us drinks so obviously I couldn’t decline. So we just sat and drank with them until we had to catch our flight, and of course by that time I was tipsy and maudlin and the weather wasn’t helping so I cried all the way to the airport (especially since we passed the arena again) and then I cried some more in the airport like the drama queen I am 🥲

It’s just that I’m so sad it’s over, and so scared and worried about the future of the band, with how much this felt like a goodbye 😔 But I’m just going to assume that it’s just goodbye for now, and that they’ll take a well-deserved break, maybe do their own things for a while, and that in a few years’ time they’ll get back to making music together again. I really do think they have so much fun doing what they do together, and they’re basically like family, and Alex wouldn’t know what to do with himself if he couldn’t make music, so surely they’ll be back eventually. But please, just don’t be too long boys 🥺🙏🏻❤️

All in all, though, what has stayed with me most from this trip is a sense of gratefulness that I was lucky enough to experience all this, my 8th and 9th Arctic Monkeys gigs to date, the last dates of the tour, the Milex reunion (!!!!!!!) and to get to share it with two of my best friends in the world, a whole bunch of arctic monkeys loving strangers who I randomly met, and all of you guys I’ve met on here these past few months. The sense of connection and community I’ve found through this band means so much to me, more than I can say, actually, and I’m so grateful to them for that, in addition to the music they’ve given us. And although the tour is over, I am honestly looking forward to sharing the love we have for them with you all for a long time to come and for now, I am so excited about getting back to writing my silly little Milex stories (and insanely happy they finally gave us that little reunion we hope for, so that I’m still excited and hopeful about their relationship rather than heartbroken and resigned, which is what I probably would’ve been if they hadn’t performed together. So thank you for that, boys 💘)

So yes. Very, VERY long story short: Arctic Monkeys is and always will be my favourite band in the world, they ended the tour on an absolute high (and with Miles!) and this was an experience I will never, ever forget ❤️

[chvnnie]

Thinking about a giant cuddle pile with Chan and Felix and Jisung when I’m sad 😢 just all soft and cuddly with snacks and blankets and snuggles all around 💕

this made my heart really warm 🥺 why not start the day off with something cute and soft

It’s just one of those days where nothing is right.

You woke up late, having to decide between showing up to class on time or brushing your teeth (rip the last stick of gum in your backpack). On the power walk to the science building, you realize there’s a teeny hole in the bottom of your worn out sneakers. Hardly noticeable — until pieces of gravel find it’s way inside.

Oh, did you forget? There’s a quiz today! Open book? What a silly little question, of course you have nothing but your memory to rely on when you’ve only just woken up.

Dropped your coffee literally minutes after buying it. The rice you bought for lunch was cold. Your favorite pen broke, you forgot your water bottle on your rush out. Bad thing after bad thing — it’s a surprise you held in the incoming spiral until you got home.

Their voices fill the hallway. About halfway to your apartment, you pause and take a really deep breath. Normally, Felix inviting his friends over doesn’t bother you. After all, they’re yours too. Jisung you’ve know since elementary school, and Chan you met on your first day of university.

“Shit.” You heard the strange boy mumble beside you, digging through his bag hopelessly. “Shit, shit, shit-“

“Are you okay?” Normally, you’d keep to yourself in class. But he seemed really, really flustered.

“I can’t find my pen. How did this happen? I bought a new pack this weekend and—“

Before he can even finish, you put a blue one on his notebook. Shiny, new. You had gone shopping yourself.

“I’ll give it back.”

He never did, and somehow lost the pen within four classes. So, you gave him another. By midterms, you had bought a pack just for Chan.

From that intro to ethics class blossomed a friendship that you can’t picture your life without. Through you, he met Jisung, and through Chan, you met Felix. The quiet, sweet guy whose roommate broke the lease unexpectedly and really needed someone to fill that vacancy.

Coming home to them is a daily occurrence. One that you typically look forward to. But today. Today you’re exhausted. The tiny apartment is going to be so loud until the early hours of dawn — how much can you take today?

They don’t hear the door open, too busy yelling at each other over Mario Kart. Jisung is losing, and Felix is gloating. The typical.

“Hey, you’re back!” Chan, happily in both the middle of the couch and ranking, flashes you a smile while still focused on the tv screen. “Want in? This race is almost over.”

“‘m okay. Kinda tired.” You force a yawn to make it more believable, dropping your bag on the rarely used dining table. “I think I’m going to take a nap.”

“Are you sure? We—“

“Maybe later?” You’re really trying to keep it together, picking at the skin around your nails. “I just need a bit. Didn’t sleep well last night.”

Chan raises an eyebrow at you, not fully convinced and slightly worried. Deciding it’s better not to press, he just nods, and turns fully back to the game.

You don’t even make it to your bed before the tears start. Body shaking, you change into a comfier set of clothes before lying face down in the center of your big bed. One deep, broken breath and the sobs begin.

Why did today have to happen? Left and right, no matter which direction you took, the outcome was the same. Sucking the life out of you and giving nothing in return.

You feel exhausted. Defeated. Hopeless.

The teeny, tiny knock is barely audible. But the creak, and shutting of the door, breaks through your cries. You don’t move, head too heavy to try and see who it is. They don’t announce themselves either; padding across the room before climbing in the bed with you. Lying right next to you, hiking his leg around your body.

The cologne is a give away. “Come on.” Jisung whispers, coaxing you into his arms. When you grunt, he moves you himself. Head to his chest, pulling you close before covering you both with the duvet.

Remember when you were little, and you fell from the play set? It wasn’t a far drop, but for your tiny body it felt like a lot. Nobody was around, class playing on the other side of the playground. All alone, softly sniffling. Your jeans are ripped, knee poking out and bloodied.

“Ouchie.” You whimper. When you try to stand, you teeter. Unsteady. Painful. How can you get help?

“You went boom.” You hear a tiny voice say, turning around to see a boy your age right behind you. “Did it hurt?”

You nod. “Big ouchie, look.”

He comes over, plops onto the ground next to you. Little brown eyes widen, lips parting in shock.

“Woah!” He leaned closer to get a better look. “You’re brave.”

It’s only of the first things Jisung ever said to you, and if you were to ask him to describe you today, he would say the same thing.

Brave. You’re brave. He’s always thought, and always will.

“Want to talk about it?” Jisung is drawing circles on your back, nails digging in just enough to be soothing.

You shake your head, clinging onto to his hoodie. “Just sad.” That’s what it comes down to — it doesn’t matter that you woke up late, and that the world was crumbling with each step you took. When you woke up, you were already aching.

There doesn’t have to be a reason. There isn’t one. Sadness just stopping in to say hello, and overstaying it’s welcome.

Your friend nods, shuffling in the bed to get more comfortable. Mingled breathing is the only sound, soft and easy. Almost lulling you into a much needed sleep.

Fluttering in and out of consciousness, you don’t notice that the tv has turned off. Jisung is just so warm; he smells good, he makes you feel safe. Why pay attention to anything else when comfort is finally hauling sadness out?

A dip in the bed, and you whine, thinking Jisung is trying to leave you. That is, until a board body presses into your back. Holding you from the other side.

“Are you guys napping without me?” Chan playfully asks, tickling your side lightly. Though you smack his hand away, he sees the teeny smile it brings. “That’s rude.”

“So was you cheating in Mario Kart, but you don’t hear me complaining.”

“You’re just a sore loser-“

“You cheated!”

“What is this?” Felix’s voice breaks up the bickering. You look up to see your roommate in the door, jaw dropped in faux shock. “A cuddle party? Without me?”

When you moved in, the apartment smelled like…burning sugar.

The blonde man was in the kitchen, spilling the most vulgar words you’ve ever heard as he quickly puts on oven mitts. You watched from the front door, not wanting to spook him as he takes the hot pan out of the oven.

He brings it to his face, closely inspecting the dessert. They were supposed to be white chocolate brownies, instead they’re as dark (and hard) as coal. With a frustrated sigh, he drops it on the counter.

“For all it matters.” You make yourself known, resisting a giggle at the way he jumps. “It smells good.”

Huffing a laugh, Felix puts his hands on his hips. “Just because we’re living together now doesn’t mean you have to appease me.”

“It’s the truth.” You say, fully entering the apartment. “What happened? Wrong temperature?”

He presses his lips together. “…I took a nap.”

It’s a shame, really. Tragic. You hate for sweets to go to waste — but oh, how you laugh. Leaning your head on his shoulder and staring down at the burned brownies.

“One day you’ll get it, Lix.”

The tupperware container is filled to the top with the same brownies, the lid almost popping off. Quickly abandoning the treats on your dresser, your roommate rushes to the bed.

And lays right on top of you.

While you giggle, the other two men groan.

“Come on, Felix.”

“This isn’t comfy—“

“It’s not my fault you didn’t leave space for me!”

You can feel the youngest man wiggle, trying to get more comfortable and thus torturing his friends. It isn’t the most practical way to group cuddle, but it is the most heartwarming. Smothered in love that you’ve never really felt worthy of, but are forever grateful for.

What was it that you were so upset about, again?

[stepswordsen]

【KHR AU】 XanLena Chibi Commission by Hika ❤️💜🔥🪷

XanLena (Xanxus/Selena) Chibi Icon Commission by Hika (@/onigiwi2namayo)

Hika's Twitter: (X)

Hika's VGen: (X)

In accordance with Hika's Terms of Service (TOS), editing, using, or reposting these arts, in any way, is prohibited without explicit permission from Hika, and me, the commissioner.

Intro

I commissioned Hika to draw my beloved XanLena ❤️💜🔥🪷

Selena is my beloved KHR OC and wife 💜🪷

Her name is Nguyễn Selena, and her Vietnamese name is Nguyễn Nguyệt Vân Liên. Her Viet name, Liên, means "lotus" in Sino-Viet 🪷

She is a Viet NB assassin with a calm and aloof personality, who's reserved and mainly keeps to herself, but cheerful around people she's close to. Her design is NB flag colours 💜🖤🤍💛

She has an interest in gardening (collecting flowers, plants, learning about different types of poisons), and fashion (collecting clothes, including traditional clothes) 💐👗

Xanxus/Selena matching cheebs ❤️💜 The little Xanxus and Selena... I'm SOOOO happy!!!

My friend Snow and I used Hika's XanLena chibi icons as matching PFPs on Discord for a bit 🥰 They're just that cute 💘

Rambles

WAHHHH THE XANLENA CHIBI ICONS ❤️💜🫶 OH MY GOD THEY'RE SO CUTEEE MY BABIES!!! 🥺💗

THEY'RE SO CUTE IN HIKA'S STYLE… REALLY ADORABLE OMG I LOVE THEIR EXPRESSIONS 🥰💞💘🫶

Selena's smiley :D and Xanxus' grumpy pouty >:|

The round lines and shapes... OMGGG ✨ I love the colours too!

I love how Hika drew Selena's eyelashes and underlashes with the dots...

I asked Hika to draw TYL Xanxus' design since I felt like his TYL (Ten Years Later) design would be easier to draw.

Hika originally chose a dark blue BG colour for the both of them, but changed it to yellow and red respectively to make them stand out more!

The blue ones were nice, but omg the final versions Hika went with, do reflect their actual colours better. These fit them better! Matching eye colors (plus it makes their hair stand out from the BG more)

Since Selena and Xanxus are toned with blue/purple in Hika's colours, the new BGs have more visual contrast!

Hika was very accommodating with minor colour edits and revisions as well! 🙏

I wanna commission Hika to draw JuAli and IdaTatsu with my headcanon designs of them in the future 🥰💘✨

My Message

This was the message I left for Hika!

The finished commission arts are wonderful! Selena and Xanxus look so cute in your art style ❤️💜🥺 Really adorable~ I'm very happy with how it turned out!

I love their expressions 🥰🫶 The thick round lines and shapes in your chibi style are great. I love how you draw dot eyelashes in your chibi style!

The colours are amazing! The orange~ish red and blue tones you chose for Xanxus has such nice visual contrast!

I love how the background colours you chose match their eye colours too~ It really brings out their designs' overall colour schemes and hair ❤️💛

Thank you for being very quick and accommodating with colour revisions as well! I look forward to commissioning you again sometime in the future! 🙏 👍

Read more under the cut if you're curious!

Misc Rambles

XanLena doodles by Sen (@/stepswordsen)

I feel like the KHR ani style goes for a much more generic art style, compared to Amano's unique art style.

For Xanxus' late manga design (Rainbow arc Xanxus), Amano improves the shape of his hair and makes it more wavy and easier to draw.

Amano has an amazing art style, and really detailed lineart and inking. She's one of the biggest inspirations for me. Her style was honestly very inspirational for me...

I started drawing everyday as a kid (at 11) BECAUSE of KHR, so KHR is very important and personal to me. I first watched KHR and read the manga at 11.

Amano's style is honestly defining to my style - It shows in the way I draw faces and eyes.

I'm not big on the KHR ani's art style, but I do appreciate what it gave us with the chibi interviews, character songs, etc. It's also cuz of the KHR ani that we (somehow) get endless KHR merch.

I prefer the manga designs, but I prefer the ani's colours for the charas because the KHR ani generally gave the KHR cast more skintone variety (when everyone was pasty in the original manga)

The KHR ani did such a great job by giving the KHR charas more skintone variety... Even pale charas in the KHR ani have different skin tones from each other.

Original vs. My Edit

I headcanon Xanxus to have tanner/warmer skin.

Xanxus with darker skin (olive skin in the KHR ani, and either olive or tan skin in certain KHR ani merch arts), literally just looks better from a character design perspective, imo. That's just facts 📠

His design has much better colour contrast with the ani colours. Like the black and red colours in his design contrast better with darker skin. Also against his blood/wine red eyes. It has more colour harmony and cohesiveness in terms of the colours

Xanxus with pale skin has less cohesiveness in terms of the colours

Xanxus, Yamamoto, and Ryouhei's designs just look so much more boring, pale, imo.

For KHR, I go manga design + ani colours + my own take on the ani colours.

Since I have a tendency to saturate colours with my own arts.

As a personal HC, I think Xanxus has a very mixed ethnicity.

My Italian American friend Feuri said Southern Italy and namely Sicily has a more mixed population.

The ani colours provide a good base for me to work off of for me to improve the colours :3

I do colour edits for fun. I like playing around with colours (editing official arts to see how the colours work together) to help guide my arts. I either do colour edits first or just immediately start picking colours for my arts

...

I usually hand artists a Drive folder filled with XanLena's art refs (including my own doodles) and write some notes on their design details since this makes things easier for the artists I'm commissioning.

Selena is Vietnamese/SEAsian with light tanned skin. She has black hair with a long ponytail that goes down to around the same length as her long front hair strands, and wears a white blouse with frills and a black seam with white buttons. She wears a black pleated skirt with a white line near the ends, and black thigh highs with horizontal white diamonds, and black doll-like shoes.

Since Xanxus wears a brown fluffy accessory, red feathers (that may be dyed red -> orange -> yellow), green strings with red beads, I don't mind if the artists I comm simplify these details.

So, whenever I commission artists, I ask for them to draw my HC versions! I'm very glad that all the artists I've commissioned have been very accommodating! 🙏💖

The XanLena chibis Hika made are being used for Hika's Chibi Icon samples 🥺 Wahhhh

...

The modern remakes of old 90s - 2000s animes have such boring and bland dull colours to me.

I seriously fear that if they ever do a KHR remake or reboot, that they're gonna take away the OG KHR ani's better colours and make everyone look pasty pale (just like in the manga) just for "manga authenticity" and "loyalty to the source material" even though everyone looks so much more boring pasty pale!!! 🧍

[milesdickpic]

Goose and Carole: The Alternate Universe Pt. 3

Click here to see the master list

Hey, besties. This is an impulse post for everyone's well-being. I know we all need a little something happy that can counter the recent chapters of HLG I have released! So without further intro... here is our Leia's first birthday! ❤️ (a birthday post for my birthday 🥹) I love you all so much! 🫶🏼 Happy reading and enjoy! 💕

A/n: It's Leia Rey's first birthday. She is going to be showered with gifts, but little do you and Bradley know... She has a gift for you all too 🥳

Word Count: 1.5k~ sowwy it's short 🥺

Warnings: cursing, but so much freaking cuteness you might throw up 😭❤️

Please don't take my work, I will find you. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Leia’s first birthday was coming up. You and Bradley had been hard at work trying to get everything ready for it. It was going to be cowboy/cowgirl themed. You and Bradley decided it was going to be called, “Leia’s First Rodeo.” Nick, Carole, and Mav helped you and Bradley with the workload. Carole especially, she practically was at your’s and Bradley’s house every day helping you do party favors and whatnot. 

“She’s gonna be one already, babe. Where has the time gone?” You and Bradley were laying in bed the night before Leia’s party. Bradley was gently rubbing Leia’s back as she slept on his chest. He looked over at the clock. “0000, sweetheart. It’s our baby girl’s birthday.” He kissed the top of Leia’s head and started to sing happy birthday to her in a whisper. 

You rubbed Leia’s back and smiled at her and Bradley as he sang to her. She was facing you and it was as if she could hear her daddy. She started to smile in her sleep. 

“Oh Brad, look!” You said in an excited whisper. “She’s smiling.” You rubbed your index finger against her cheek. “Our pretty girl.” You leaned into her and kissed her lips. “Happy birthday, Princess Leia.”

The next morning you woke up to giggling. You opened your eyes slowly and looked over your shoulder. You saw Leia sitting up on Bradley’s stomach. He was holding her hands and making faces at her. She was giggling and bouncing on his stomach. You watched as he picked her up and held her parallel above him. He brought her up and down, every down he placed kisses on her face making her squeal. When she squealed really loud Bradley gasped. “Oh, my little love. You have to be quiet Mommy’s asleep.” 

You turned around all the way and smiled. Bradley and Leia both looked over at you and then back at each other. They had the same guilty facial expression. “Uh-oh, Leia. We’ve been caught.” Bradley blew a raspberry on her tummy and laid her down in between the both of you. 

“Are you ready for this party babe?” Bradley smiled at you. 

You nodded. “Let’s get this rodeo started.” You started to giggle.

~~~~~

Bradley had invited some of his close friends from work. Mav, Carole, and Nick invited some old friends. You invited your best friend Bri and her boyfriend. 

Bradley came down the stairs with Leia on his hip. He had his whole outfit on and ready. He tipped his hat to you and winked. "How do we look, honey?"

You raised your brows and bit your lip. You made your way over and placed a kiss on Leia's cheek. You fixed Bradley's hat and winked at him. "You are sexier than socks on a Rooster." (hehehe 😈)

He hummed and got closer to you. "Huh, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me, mama." You started to giggle. "Although, I think I look sexier with just socks on." He winked and you started to laugh harder. Then the doorbell rang. Bradley placed a kiss on your head and gave you Leia before he went to open the door.

Nick, Carole, and Mav were the first ones to show up. Nick was wearing a whole get-up with Mav. From the cowboy hat down to the boots. They came galloping into the house. Mav was holding up a gift bag as he came over to greet Leia. 

He picked her up and kissed her cheek over and over again. “Happy Birthday, my little Leia!” He continued to attack her with kisses until Nick took her away from him. 

“All right, Grampa Goose’s turn. Step aside, Mav.” He tossed Leia into the air and blew a raspberry into her cheek. “Happy birthday, my favorite girl!” He pointed at Bradley. “Not you this timed, squared. My other little girl.” He poked Leia’s belly causing her to giggle. 

Bradley rolled his eyes and went to go help his mom carry in some gifts for Leia. Nick and Mav came up next to you with the biggest puppy dog eyes. You looked at them both confused. 

“Can I help you, boys?” You started to laugh. 

“Can Leia open our present now?” Mav gave you a pouty lip and held his hands to his chin. 

Nick nodded. “Yea, y/n. Pretty please.” He put his cheek next to Leia’s and gave you the biggest pouty lip. 

You started to laugh and Bradley came over. “What the hell are you two doing to my wife?” He started to laugh. Carole came over and slapped both guys on the back. 

“Oh! Would you two stop!”

They both stood up and rubbed their backs. “Ow.” Mav furrowed his brows and looked at Carole. 

“Ouch, honey. That wasn’t very nice. I’m holding Leia.” Nick pointed at Leia as she sat against his hip. Carole squinted his eyes at him and took Leia from his arms. 

She punched him again and he flinched against it. “OUCH!” Leia started to giggle. 

You looked at Mav and Nick as they winced at their pain. “She can open ONE.”

They high-fived. “YES!” They brought over the gift bag to Leia and cooed at her. 

Carole held her in her arms and bounced her up and down as Mav and Nick covered her in kisses. “Happy birthday, Leia!” The three of them said at the same time. 

“Open the present, baby!” Nick helped her pull the paper out of the bag. 

Mav pulled out the little pink boots for Leia. “Oh my gosh! What’s this, sweetheart?” Mav gasped as he showed them to Leia. You and Bradley sat back against the counter and watched as the three of them showed Leia her first gift. 

“How about we try them on, sweetheart?” Mav raised his brows at Leia. He slipped them onto her little feet. “Oh, they’re perfect!” 

Nick and Carole clapped for Leia as she kicked her little feet. “Yay!”

Nick pulled out the next present, “There’s more, little Leia!” He poked her belly. He pulled out a matching pink cowgirl hat. “Ooooo! Your first hat, honey!” He placed it gently onto her head. Leia smiled big. “Oh, you are the most beautiful cowgirl I have ever seen!” Nick placed a kiss on her cheek. Mav grabbed Leia from Carole and held her up to show you and Bradley. 

“She’s ready for this hoedown!” You and Bradley clapped and Bradley went over to grab his daughter. He kissed her over and over again as they all crumbled at Leia’s outfit. 

~~~~

Everyone had finally arrived at the party. Everyone was dressed accordingly. It was finally time for Leia’s cake. She was sitting on the floor with Bradley’s friends playing with toys. She kept handing her toys to Bob and Fanboy. She loved when they made noises with her planes and flew them around. Phoenix and Payback were making radio calls acting like they were the pilots in the planes. Hangman held onto Leia as she was standing trying to grab the planes from Bob and Fanboy. Coyote laid back against the couch and watched as they all were entertaining the birthday girl. 

You and Bradley came over and were ready to steal your girl for her cake. Bradley squatted down and held his hands out for Leia. You, Nick, and Carole stood behind him. “Come to Daddy, sweetheart!” Bradley gave his daughter a big smile. 

She had yet to take her first steps. Bradley was always practicing with her but she would always fall before she took her first step. Hangman held Leia as she took steps to Bradley. He eventually let her go and she was standing on her own. 

“Holy shit.” Bradley watched as Leia gained her balance. Every guest in the house watched on. 

Mav watched closely with wide eyes. “She’s gonna do it. Holy shit.”

Leia wobbled slightly and took a little step. Bradley opened his mouth wide. Everyone stayed quiet as they watched Leia take another step and then one more before falling to her butt. Everyone erupted and Bradley swooped Leia into his arms and covered her in kisses. “You did it, babe! You took your first steps, sweetheart!” You and Bradley cried and gave Leia kisses. Nick came over and attacked Leia with kisses. 

“You did it, Jedi! You walked!” He grabbed Leia from Bradley and he and Carole covered her in kisses. He held her up to everyone. “WATCH OUT EVERYONE, WE HAVE A WALKER ON OUR HANDS!”

~~~~~~

Bradley finally made his way to Leia’s high chair and placed her in it for her cake. You placed her smash cake in front of her and lit the candle. You and Bradley stood behind her high chair as everyone began to sing happy birthday to Leia. You and Bradley blew out her candle and gave her a kiss on her cheeks. You both kissed her so hard to squish her cheeks and gave her a little fish face. 

Everyone clapped and cheered for Leia as she dug into her cake. You and Bradley knelt down next to her and she each fed you both some cake. Bradley kissed Leia’s messy face and smiled. 

“Happy birthday, princess. Daddy loves you so much.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AHHHHH! We all got to experience her first birthday! I hope this all helped a little with the pain I've been putting you through. I love you all! See you in the next post! 🫶🏼

Leia's first birthday party guests are in the comments 🤠🥳

[goosewriting]

guys GUYS i started playing star wars outlaws yesterday and today ND-5 finally made his appearance and omg. the SCREAM i scrumped when he appeared on screen, and with such a cool intro too argh!! also like the designers were cooking with the big coat and the rolled up sleeves and the low belt and tiny waist and deep voice and hfuwjjfjs😩🤤🤌 it's not a stretch to say i only wanted to play this game for him and i am actually having a grand old time playing? like i have to hold back my cal instincts of going into any place sabre and blasters a-blazing, but the sneaky aspect is really cool and there's a lot of new mechanics i'm enjoying and nix is such a cute little sweetheart 🥺💕

all of this to say, the brain is rotting and the worms are feasting, so please stay tuned for what comes next :') once i advance the story a bit more and get a better grasp on ND's personality and backstory, i am most definitely writing something for him!!!

[green-planets]

Making up for some missed StEx Appreciation Month days! Here's an old family photo of Human! AU Freight Family. In addition to adopting all these kiddos, Momma and Poppa also opened their doors to any kids who had troubled home lives, so CB and BV were at their house quite a bit. Eventually, they'd adopt Rusty too!

I put more StEx Appreciation Month stuff under the cut because it's long

StEx Appreciation Month Day Twelve: Poppa/Momma!

Favorite Songs/Moments: The intro to Starlight Express and the Starlight Sequence, love Poppa/Momma's duet with Rusty ❤️

Favorite Costume: I don't have a favorite. All of them are fine

Favorite Ships: Poppa x Belle or Momma x Belle are fine

Unpopular opinions: I don't really like Light at the End of the Tunnel. I'm sorry, the conversion to steam stuff just rubs me the wrong way

StEx Appreciation Month Day Thirteen: Rockies! The sillies!!

Favorite Songs/Moments: Freight! Also love watching them during Poppa/Momma's blues. Shout out to Right Place, Right Time being so objectively funny! Here's Rusty at his lowest then the Rockies bust in and tell him to give up while dropping the sickest dance moves

Favorite Costume: The old Bochum ones, gotta love the booty shorts (also Pink! Rocky, my beloved)

Favorite Ships: Brocky, I don't have any ships for Rocky 2 or 3

Unpopular opinions: None I guess? Bring back Rocky 4 but make him pink??

Stex Appreciation Month Day Fourteen: Hip Hoppers! I don't have much to say about them, but their version of the Rap is cheesy and fun

StEx Appreciation Month Day Fifteen: Dustin! Super underrated, I love Dustin so much

Favorite Songs/Moments: His little moment with Rusty after the Starlight Sequence, going ham on the harmonica during Poppa/Momma's Blues, the OLC Rap where he defends Rusty. I'm so glad that he stays back with Flat-Top now after Rusty is beaten up by the gang. If you can't tell, Dustin and Rusty's friendship is so important to me 🥺

Favorite Costume: Once again, I don't think I have a favorite but the Bochum ones are nice

Favorite Ships: Rustin is cute

Unpopular opinions: None!

StEx Appreciation Month Day Sixteen: Flat-Top! The smelly garbage boy (affectionate)

Favorite Songs/Moments: He's so fun to watch in general! The brick selfies are great and he's especially hilarious during Pumping Iron and Poppa/Momma's Blues

Favorite Costume: I appreciate his London look, but Bochum edges it out for me. I like the bricks

Favorite Ships: Flat-Top x Brick I don't actively ship him with anyone

Unpopular opinions: I don't think I have any!

[scrappedtogether]

EDIT: Wrote this back before there were physical copies released! But yeah! Happy we got the DVD eventually 🥳🥳🥳

Not saying I watched a pirated copy of Scooby Doo and Krypto Too but supposing I did, here were my thoughts. 😅 Spoilers!

Things I Loved: :)

* Fred was literally 🥺 this whole movie

* The VAPHNE in this movie omg. the Daphne saving Velma and the little exchange with Velma saying Daph could be Wonder Woman and her saying Velma is more like Wonder Woman. OBSSESSED

* The way the Gang was so cute with Krypto. Fred scratching him, Daph’s little kiss at the end, Velma patting his back.

* The Krypto & Scoob friendship was !!!

* Krytpo’s cute little round little face and his eyes

* The framing of so many shots with Daph in them, esp the shot with the batarang

* I liked the opening song a lot

* REX RUTHOR RAT’S RIGHT

* RATS RIGHT. RAND

* Daphne having extra Scooby Snax

* Fred trying so hard to impress Daphne and her trying to be put out but she just finds him so adorable and how flirty the whole locker room scene was and IMSCREAMING rn

* Shaggy’s archery skills <3 and not abandoning Scooby

* Daphne’s cute exasperated “Freddie…” 🥹

* Scooby landing in Daphne’s arms after he fell and then later him in Daphne’s arm and Shaggy in Velma’s

* The Fraphne cheek kiss and the hands 🥰

* Fred in Daphne’s arms. MY HERO

* Velma putting her chin in her hands after hacking in the computer while being so :3

* The Gang (I think Daph) offering to give Lex a dollar…😡 mY BiLlS aRe PeRfeCtlY CrIsP

* Fred offering to drop Lex off someplace (he’s so nice guys I just 💙🧡💙)

* Fred getting low key annoyed when the Valet was smooching the Mystery Machine

* Scooby and Shaggy’s costume swaps were cute in this <3

* Lex’s alternative villain monologue

Other Things

* Feel like the opening intro to Metropolis may have gone on a bit long. It was very cool to see all of Superman’s baddies but considering some of them didn’t come back (a few I don’t think even got properly introduced/name dropped like Brainiac) I think they could have cut it a bit 🤏

* Wish there was more time with the JLA esp. Superman!!! Totally a bias thing but I just love them and it would have been fun to get a few more scenes between Krypto & Superman I think

* Not a critique but I was very curious why Krypto didn’t speak in this movie

* The end fight scene may have also gone on a smidge too long but there were a lot of great moments

Overall, enjoyed it and bummed it likely will never get a full release and the people who put so much into this film will never get their deserts for it. :/ What’d you guys think?

[helluvapurf]

Ayyyy new HB episode just dropped, and its the Fizzarolli one!~ Been SUPER curious about it since the initial trailers/sneak peek previews, soooo... lets talk about it~

*SPOILER WARNING AHEAD FOR THOSE WHO DIDN'T SEE IT YET-*

First things first, the Positives:

-Loved loved LOVED Fizzarolli and Asmodeus since their initial debuts in "Ozzie's", and... yeah, I very much enjoyed them here too!~ 👏From Fizz's maniacally-pampered goofiness to Ozz's "lovingly suave & powerful" demeanor, it blends into some super enjoyable chemistry when we see them both onscreen~ ❤️Not that they have a flawless relationship ofc, given Ozzie's overprotective coddling at times & Fizz being too careless about his own safety (+his inner worry of what the public would think of Ozz dating an Imp)... but at the end of the day, whether it's fluffy cuddles, kinky fun, or pummeling the hell out of some boring lawyer dude... it seems like nothing will ever tear these two apart, aww~ :3

-Blitz and Fizz's dynamic was SO fun to watch from start to finish, everything including their snarky banter at the start, their gradual teamwork when kidnapped, and their heart-to-heart by the end was quite touching to see play out (like man you can just FEEL the pain in Blitz's voice as he recounted all that tragedy/genuinely felt remorse for what happened... poor guy ;-; )🥺 I know some could argue that Fizz forgiving Blitz at the end was a little... "rushed", but personally I like to see it more as them agreeing start over "fresh" to give time in rebuilding things, with plenty to catch up on now that they're free from danger 👍 Here's to some more great Blitz/Fizz content in future HB eps!

-As... "lukewarm" as I've grown towards Stolas lately, I honestly found him pretty fine here in terms of character portrayal/writing (surprising too that he didn't take up much screentime since he stayed more to the sidelines during the B-plot... huh .3.). The lil bit of him excited to read the contract was pretty funny too lol ("Ohoho, I love words!~")

-Didn't expect to see Striker so soon, but he proved a fun threat to watch along with the bigger arsenal in Crimson's gang! 👌 Curious to see what he'll be up to next, with that slick escape of his by the end~ 👀

-I liked the lil fly-Chihuahua things Fizz had as pets during the intro, they were cute :3

-Much better writing in the humor-department here, as even some of the "raunchier" jokes (like from Fizz and/or Ozzie) didn't really phase me here since most of them do come from two prominent Lust Ring performers. Ironically enough though, it was actually Crimson who surprisingly gave me the most laughs ngl (like the screen recording threat to Ozzie, his confused face at Fizz singing in Italian, etc. lmao).

-Beautiful shots of animation & color work as usual, and even Fizz's song (-cluttered as it was lol) proved an amusing one to see given the circumstances of him improvising the whole time XD. Hope we'll see more of Alex Brightman's singing talents in HB's future, given his past Broadway work! 👏

-So it looks like we were right to assume Stolas is planning to give Blitz an Asmodean Crystal after all (possibly meaning the end of their Full Moon deal, too? :o), so that'll be interesting to see how that'd play out later (esp. now that Fizz gave the okay to let Blitz have it by the end, thanks to their renewed bond ^^)

Now, as for any potential Negatives...:

-As much as I enjoyed Striker's antagonist role here, along with the looming forces he gained from Crimson's alliance... like, why is Crimson of all people here for the villain-count, again? .-. Sure, it is refreshing that Striker's learning to let go of "sucking up" to Goetia's (aka: Stella & her brother) to get by... buuuut idk, I would've thought Crimson's next big appearance would've been suited more to a Moxxie and/or Millie-centered plot, I guess? 🤷 Idk...

-For someone who went through such an intense kidnapping/beat-up during his last starring role... I'm surprised Stolas is apparently walking around fine now, with no other visible injury? I mean sure, he is a Goetia so I guess it makes sense he'd heal up fast... yet since its only been canonically a week since "Western Energy" happened, I feel like he should've at least had a couple bandages/scars on him, to at least leave some more of a narrative impact of what he went through imo.

-Funny as the B-plot was with the boring lawyer guy... yeaaaaah I'll admit after awhile, I couldn't help wondering why Ozzie didn't just say "f*** it" and killed the dude already lol. Like, big threats from Crimson aside... Asmodeus IS an Embodiment of Sin nonetheless, arguably more powerful than any Goetia if we consider the Hell hierarchy system. Couldn't he have just... idk, raised up hell like Stolas did in "Truth Seekers" to go save his man? 🤷 Not that it took me out of the ep too much given all the great Blitz & Fizz content we got instead... buuuut yeah lol.

-With that one flashback sequence of Blitz and Fizz's childhood... I'm surprised Barbie Wire didn't show up much in it (save for the burned photo with their mom)? .-. I mean I'll admit I even saw some leaked storyboard-screencaps showing that Barbie was meant to be seen running out during the tent fire scene, but in the actual-finished ep she's just... not there somehow? Weird .x.;

-I'm... not really sure how to feel about Blitz straight up calling Striker a "supremacist"? Like yeah Striker's clearly within the "Eat The Rich" mentality since his debut in S1... buuuut with how its been subtly stated of how oppressed the Imp race is compared to most other Hell classes, I don't really get how Striker is "wrong" to outright detest royalty/rich folk? .-. Idk, hopefully they'll clear this up more with a later episode/backstory moment for Striker down the line... 'cause otherwise, the implications of it all just feels very... ehhhhh .x.;;

-...okay, I'm just gonna cut to the chase here (*and no offense meant-in advance to any shippers out there, btw*), but I'm... reeeeally not a fan of how much this show's been trying to "water down" Blitz and Stolas' current dynamic here 😑 Like, its one thing to show Stolas catching honest, genuine feelings but recognizing his mistakes enough to try & make things "right" (hence again, the Asmodeon Crystal thing)... but to straight up paint Blitz as being some "uwu stubborn meanie who doesn't know true love when he sees iiiiit~" is just... really? 🤦

Mind you, Stolas is the same guy who coerced Blitz into their Grimoire deal all so Blitz can keep up his I.M.P. business (& for Stolas to... well, "get some" >>;), kept stepping over boundaries throughout S1 (aka: calling him "Blitzy" over & over, hitting on him when he's not interested, etc.), and then didn't even try to defend Blitz when they both got publicly mocked in "Ozzie's" (only way later when they were in the privacy of his manor did he offer to talk/have some "cuddly couple time" together... 😒). Again, I don't mean to dunk on Stolas too much 'cause I know he IS trying to be better now (+Blitz wasn’t exactly a saint either, given that he only ever asked out Stolas back then just so he could spy on M&M >>)... but really, all that in mind I can't say I blame Blitz for not being exactly "receptive" to Stolas' affections 🤷 Personally, I think its best that these two just give eachother some space (once the Grimoire/Crystal thing is sorted out), imho...

----------

Aaaaand yeah, all-in-all I'd say this ep was... probably the best of S2, so far??😳Not "perfect" by any means, and def could've used a bit more polish in a few scenes/plot holes/script-writing... all-in-all, the strong chemistry of Blitz, Fizzarolli, Asmodeus amongst the drama made it a truly worthwhile episode~! 👏👏As for my current S2 ranking atm:

"Oops" (S2 Ep. 6)

"Western Energy" (S2 Ep. 4)

"Exes and Oohs" (S2 Ep. 3)

"The Circus" (S2 Ep. 1)

"Unhappy Campers" (S2. Ep 5)

"Seeing Stars" (S2. Ep 2)

[seiwas]

omg ari.... i have no words....

ari 😭 you wrote me a damn essay i am crying 😭😭😭

my jaw dropped when i saw this in my notifs omg i'm sorry i'm getting to this so late too!!

you are always so thoughtful and kind with giving reviews i am sniffling sawbing what the hek!!! 😭😭 am gonna try to answer to each thing as much as i can!!

pls don't apologise at all for taking long omg i'm thankful that you even considered reading it in the first place 😭 you are so cute!! dshbfsj needing the time to absorb it omg 😭 i completely get you tho, i'm like that too!!

to say my writing makes you emotional bc it's so painfully soft that it hurts omg 😭 that is such a nice thing to say i am so emosdfhbsdf and to say rdg my fics feel like surgery omg PLS 😭 i am so touched that this lil work of mine made you cry 😭 (am sending you a box of tissues for reparations 🤧)

ive always found my writing style to be relatively plain and simple so am so happy to hear that you like it 🥺 esp since i find yours so distinct and rich!! it means so much coming from you 🥺 being able to make people feel things is such a compliment for me bc what is art!! if not to make others feel smth right!!!! 🥺

i am so glad!! you saw through my intro line and am happy that you think it set the tone for the fic 🥺 i feel like i always try to start fics that way now—with one line that introduces an element of the fic, whether it's tone, or mood, or motif, theme, etc. in this case, it was the theme (and unintentionally, the tone too!) it's exactly that too!!!! a contrast to his greedy nature jhbfs you get it!!

i am always so touched when people comment on my characterisations bc i do feel like i spend the most time on it �� writing this piece was honestly torture lmao 😭😭 getting into gojo's headspace was tough and i was having such a hard time that churning this out literally felt like i was writing in the dark 😭 so to hear you say this!! that i wrote him thoughtully and that he feels real and human 🥺 it makes everything feel so worth it.

as my first long gojo fic, writing gojo shy and boyish was such a joy for me too 🥺 bringing out a side of him that i didn't think a lot of people wrote at the time. i think a bit of my own personal affections came through too 🥺 (that ice cream scene was one i went over time and time again, but i'm happy with how it turned out in the end!!)

and omg him being desperate and afraid—i'm so flattered you found in chilling. i thought about the concept of gojo being openly afraid for a while because i didn't know if it was ooc for him to be that way. but ultimately, i did realise that that's exactly why it's so heartbreaking—because he isn't like that normally. yet, with this, he's brought down to his knees, in pain, almost pleading. it hurts to think about and it hurt writing it. and i think the journey there is complicated and tiring and frustrating, esp on the end of whoever's dealing with gojo (col reader), because, he really is so hard to read!!! it is so satisfying for me that you picked up on all of these things (ofc you did, it's you ari 😭).

that office scene was especially hard to write because i felt the tension crushing my heart shdbsajhd having him kneel was a conscious choice bec i wanted it to be a moment of surrender, and like you mentioned, helpless!!

and here you are!! flattering me again!! omg 😭 telling me that i'm good at bringing out a character's humanity??? omg 😭 i could cry!!! the little details about them?? omg 😭 i don't want to get all sappy here but ultimately i think it's because i think that's how love is!! knowing someone so intimately, good and bad and still accepting them for it. the little quirks & habits that make them them, the ugly parts they don't want others to see 🥺 yeah... i have lots of feelings abt this 😭

and omg the divinity theme yes!!! our brain cells connecting IS SO TRUE PLS

AND OMG. the tethered to satoru in pursuit of gojo—i feel like you might be one of the first to point out that line!! you got it 100% omg 😭 it's really losing himself in pursuit of something else, 'greater', and in the process losing col reader too 🥺

hsdjgdjf i'm so happy that you also noticed that he does love reader and fears for how he affects her too 🥺 i think it's so easy to get lost in the idea that gojo doesn't care as much as reader does, and is entirely too focused on himself to worry about how reader feels... but i do think!!! that given their history and what their relationship has gone through, there's just no way he could disregard her feelings like that. there has to be a reason why he's distancing himself, and it's in consideration of her too.

i've read this fic so many times, going over it, editing, rereading to see if i still like it as much months later, that all those lines you mentioned stay burned in my mind omg 😭 they're all lines i hold near and dear to me too.

to hear that you resonated with col!gojo a lot omg especially w that line 😭 that line actually inspired the whole concept of the fic!! dbsdfb

you are also (once again, im not surprised) right!!!! the frustration of not knowing how to do this one thing when he can do anything else right. i liked playing with that idea bc of the contrast it provides to his character!! how this one thing that should come so naturally, doesn't to him.

and col reader omg.... when i tell you ari.... the way col reader has grown on me too. some people might think this is a self-shippy thing, that i write col reader patterned after me, but that isn't the case at all 😭 i wouldn't put up with half the stuff col reader's put with 😭 like she's a trooper fr!!! such a sweetheart!!! an ideal partner i envision for someone like col gojo 😭

i am so happy you see her resilience, you don't even know. a lot of the readers that i've read with gojo have been either feisty ones that match him, or ones absolutely lovestruck with him. i kind of wanted to see what it would be like with a reader who's gentler, a bit quieter, letting him speak when he's ready, and patient most of all. because of that, i was really scared that col reader would feel a bit passive, even though i really intended for her to have this steady resilience to her. someone can be strong and kind, yes!! that's what i wanted her to embody 🥺 and that observation of yours!! gojo being the physically stronger one but depending on reader for the emotional side of things!! that's so true 🥺 i didn't really think of it that way initially, but now completely see it too!!!

the col couple is so very dear to me because they really are so gentle with each other 🥺 i'm so happy you love them too 🥺 (i also giggled at 'this gutted me like a sad fish. ur ability to turn my heart into sashimi w only a couple of finely chosen words kills me every time' that is so vivid but ofc i can trust u to come up with smth like that 😭😭😭)

seeing you go through the feels for col reader is SO lovely 😭 she truly deserves everything for all the shit she put up with 😭 how she gives him an out always because she understands that it's scary and it's hard and she loves him that's why she's so considerate of him 😭 the love in her heart too!! AAAH there's a line in... i think 2 fics from this one, 'look my way, you're what i crave', that kind of affirms the kind of reader col reader is and i 🥺🥺🥺 all the time

(and omg!! i have that fic in my tbr rn 😌 i am SO excited to read it, i LOVE concepts like that sdfhbs the ambiguity!! the need for nothing labelled!! nothing more!! as long as the feelings are there and mutual 🥺 yeah 🥺 i also get so happy when our views overlap!!! bc then i think 'omg i can run to ari w this and they'd get me 200% shdfsdh it's like you said!! our braincells connecting!!!)

omg ari... i swear... 😖 i do think gojo cries abt it 😭 tears up 😭 gets emotional 😭 the whole thing 😭 & that trope/dynamic is also so dear to me!!! the patience is very healing to me too 🥺

and yes omg reader's struggles with it too. sometimes i feel like i don't portray it enough but reader definitely had such a hard time with gojo 😭 i don't mention it i think (maybe in future works), but reader truly... had to build her way to that level of understanding. she didn't just come out knowing how to deal w gojo 😭 i think it came with a lot of time, shared experiences, and a deep knowing of him that got her to this point (smth i hope to explore in col 0 and fics set between col 0 to 'do you believe in love?')

AND AAAAAH their lil cute scenes were my my ways of soothing myself while writing this omg 😭 u r so real for being jealous of both of them 😭 i'm glad you can see their history and comfortability with one another!! flustery gojo is the cutest i agree 🥺 to reduce such a self-assured man to a blushing mess!!! i swear!! it does smth!!! and all the subtle intimacies between them!!!!!

and omg the final point you discussed, how gojo has such a big heart! yes!! omg i think gojo's a complex character because he's always somewhere in the middle of two things. in this case, while i do think gojo has a big heart that cares for others and looks out for them, i don't think he's selfless either. i actually think he can be pretty selfish, whether for personal motives, or for the sake of other things that will contribute to a goal he wants tor each in the end. it's smth i think abt a lot, but gojo isn't necessarily a goody goody guy but he cares about the people who matter to him.

and your tags!! omg these are all so sweet pls don't feel bad at all 😭 it's not a mess!! you relayed your thoughts so perfectly!! and even if it were a mess, i wouldn't love it any less!!!

i appreciate you so much for taking the time to read this, to sort through your favourite bits and write such a long and lovely essay on it oh my goodness 😭 you didn't have to do this at all ari!! you are so sweet!!

i always feel such an outpour of love from you in every interaction we have and i am so grateful for it 🥺 i appreciate you so so much and i know i can always count on you when it comes to our guy 🥺 you just get him. ily ari, truly, we are writing novels for eachother atp HAHAHAHAHAHA

₊˚⊹｡ tell me about love (show me how) | gojo satoru

wc: 7.4k

summary: you teach gojo how to love. 

contains: f!reader in mind but no pronouns mentioned, descriptions of blood (typical jjk canon type stuff), shibuya onwards manga spoilers, implied minor character death, there are swears, suggestive bit at the end (but it’s funny!), lots of internal thoughts/dialogues, kind of canon divergent

a/n: relates to my short blurb, do you believe in love?, explores a lot on how i think gojo would be when it comes to love; ambiguous but linear timeline (jumps through scenes)

collection masterlist: conversations on love 01. do you believe in love? <- you are here -> 2.5. and my body keeps saying (it's yours)

When Gojo has love for the taking, he makes no move to reach for it. 

It’s unusual for him to be so restrained, being born into greed and predetermined purpose—a one-man clan fated to hold power close to God. There exists a hunger within him, insatiable and stubborn, unstoppable until he gets what he wants. It’s all he’s ever known: to take and devour, simply because he can. 

Yet with this, he doesn’t. He can’t seem to. 

“I think I’ll always want to be with you, Satoru.” 

When you offer your heart to Gojo, he looks at you softly. 

You catch his eyes and see the sky, bright, with flecks of light floating on his irises like cotton clouds in its periphery. It’s different from the piercing blue you’re used to—a terrifying riptide that washes you away. 

It wasn’t intended as a confession, but Gojo always takes whatever you have to say. He commits it to memory each time; how could he not? Words that come from you flow so naturally, so earnestly that the air around you shifts all on its own.

His lips part slightly, red spatterings lining pink inner corners before they close again. He doesn’t say anything, but you know Gojo and the fingerprints of his soul—the way he bites his lips to withhold himself from speaking. 

It’s dangerous, he thinks, how you make wanting something so complicated seem so simple.

He takes a small breath, then you feel it, pressed against you—the faint signature of his cursed energy overlaying his entirety. It tickles your skin a little, the effects of it brushing. You don’t remember the last time he put it up around you.

A million things run through Gojo’s mind for every split second he breathes, but at this point in time, he counts a million and one—one thought that if he touches you by infinity instead of his hands, he can have this good thing for now, that this is the only way how. 

You’d think this a rejection, if any, but he doesn’t move away from you, and the blush blooming at the tips of his ears says more than he ever could. 

.

.

.

The subtle intimacy you share with Gojo grows sporadically, from knuckles brushing to pinkies touching. He stands next to you more often, a few inches closer than he used to and sometimes, still, with an infinity connecting you.

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.

When you hold Gojo’s hand for the first time, he jolts very slightly, as if you’ve shocked him. He’s started to put his infinity down around you again, and you continue the limbo of whatever it is you both are—except this time, he’s made it clearer, just a little bit. 

During the last few leaves of fall, Gojo skips to an ice cream stand like a pre-schooler on early dismissal. You trail behind him slowly, shaking your head affectionately; he’s the only adult you know that still acts like he’s 5. 

“You’re like a horse.” you jest, stopping next to him in line.

“You’re a snail.” he huffs, side-eyeing you, like a child.

You gasp exaggeratingly, hitting his arm. He fake-winces, but that’s all it is; Gojo’s the strongest and you don’t know of any human touch that has managed to hurt him, except—

Yeah. Your eyes trail to the side of his neck, hidden in the shadows of his jawline; there’s really nothing, but sometimes you blink and see crimson, oozing, gushing, leaking—you shake away the thought.  

When he receives his ice cream cone stacked with vanilla-strawberry-vanilla and rainbow sprinkles on top, the smile on his face parallels the sun. He looks cozy, almost boyish, beaming against the autumn breeze blowing on his thick gray hoodie. 

You wonder if he feels just as warm.

(Maybe that’s why you do it, then).

Once Gojo turns to give you the cone, you reach for his other hand tentatively, shyly—your fingertips grazing his palm lightly. You want to give him an out if he can’t take this, but he doesn’t move. He twitches a little, as if he’s been caught off guard, but that’s it. 

His eyes widen briefly, just a bit, before turning into the same soft skies frequenting them lately. 

“Sorry, is this okay?” you whisper, peering up at him. 

He stares at you for a while, his hand in yours unmoving. You leave a sliver of space between your palms–your own version of his infinity–just in case. And he takes it all in: how tiny your hand is wrapped around his, how gently you speak—how warm he feels now amidst this autumn breeze. 

“The strawberry’s really good,” he finally replies, pressing the dessert closer to you, “try it.” 

You give him one last look before you indulge in his request. Gojo’s always been good at that: pushing and pulling—pushing you away with non-answers only to pull you back in with something else. 

But he doesn’t let go of your hand, so you keep yours there, palms nearly touching. (You make a point not to mention how the parts that do touch become clammy for the rest of the afternoon). 

.

.

.

You start to think that your relationship with Gojo is going somewhere, then he disappears (‘gets sealed’ might be the more proper term). 

His absence is deafening. You’ve all lost so much, and it hurts, but you carry on knowing full well that this is what being a jujutsu sorcerer means. There aren’t many left to fight his fight, so you do what you can to. You stay with Shoko, mostly, if not going back and forth with Utahime. You can’t afford to be crying when the students, the kids—you can’t even bear to think about what they’re going through.

Nights are the hardest, when the world is quiet but your mind is loud, throwing far too many questions you can’t find the answers to.

What will Gojo come back to? Then the scarier thought: Will he even come back? 

You don’t want to doubt him, ever, but your mind continues to play back that day, like a final memory. The unintentional confession; his eyes like the sky. 

You don’t want it to be the last important thing you tell him. 

“I should start looking into retirement plans, like Nanamin.” you raise an eyebrow, questioning. Gojo’s never spoken this far into the future before, most especially his. 

“Work is shit now for you too?” you scoff, leaning back on the wooden ledge. 

Gojo rolls his eyes, skipping the coverage of his blindfold today. 

“Well, after I remove the old geezers and change everything, there won’t be much left to do.” 

You hum in response. He does make a point. 

“Also, Megumi won’t need me anymore,” he pouts, whining, “who else will want me around?” 

You try to hold back your laugh, wanting so badly to tell him that Megumi doesn’t even really like him around to begin with—but you figure breaking Gojo’s heart isn’t really something you want to do if you value your peace. 

“I don’t know,” you reply, shifting your weight, “I think I’ll always want to be with you, Satoru.” 

Even now, especially now. You wish you were with him, too. 

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.

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The day you hear of Gojo’s potential return, you drop your breakfast outside the 7-Eleven near Jujutsu Tech. You’re supposed to meet up with Utahime for a weekly check-in but your feet take you to Shoko, and the footsteps in your heart have never echoed louder. 

This is the first good news in a while—especially after finding out about the state of Megumi and what happened to Tsumiki, your sweet girl Tsumiki. 

When Gojo comes back, it’s like he never left. He pops out of the box joking the same way, talking the same way. He proves himself to be the strongest all the same, and when he wins—there are scars, but he wins and that fact stays the same. 

So, when you reach for his hand now and he moves away, you’re stuck wondering what’s changed. 

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.

You let it stay that way for a while, your understanding extending to Gojo the way it always has—you don’t push, and he gives you what he can. It honestly isn’t all that bad, because at least he’s still talking to you like he used to. 

Jujutsu society is still shaken from its core. You and all who have survived bear the task of building everything from the ground up; it’s exhausting, especially since most of you are still mourning. 

Megumi’s been put in an induced coma; you understand why but it still tugs at your heart when Shoko tells you it might take a while. Everyone else has been assigned to sweep through the rest of Japan to ensure that any remaining curses are taken care of. 

You see Yuuji and Yuuta visit Megumi sometimes, along with Maki and Toge when they’re free. Gojo’s there pretty often too, using healing sessions with Shoko as an excuse to see the boy he’s practically raised at 17, with you. 

But while Gojo’s smiles to everyone else remain as charming as ever, you can always tell when they’re untrue. 

.

“Are you okay?” 

You find Gojo a little after midnight on the rooftop of the faculty building. The city always looks pretty from up here—a sea of lights reflected up on the sky. It’s a running joke that rooftops are Gojo’s ‘thing’, but you know he really only comes to places like this to think. You wonder what’s on his mind now, coming here every single night since being unsealed. 

Despite how quiet you try to be, sneaking up on Gojo is almost impossible; he senses you before he hears you, sees the familiar traces of your cursed energy through his Six Eyes. 

“Can’t sleep thinking about me?” he teases, looking straight ahead.

The steps you take towards him are careful, afraid of running him off like you seem to be lately. You sit beside him, leaving a space larger than you usually do, then shrug, “These days, yeah.”

It’s times like this when Gojo forgets how honest you can be, how he takes your word for everything, completely. 

It’s threatening, he thinks, how you can say so much with so little. 

“Well, maybe I can suggest—” 

“Seriously, Satoru,” you grip the ledge tightly, knuckles turning white, “please.” 

You tend to let Gojo dodge your questions a lot of the time, his elusiveness a hallmark of who he is. So you never sound like you do now, serious, pleading. 

Gojo fiddles with his fingers, pondering. He hums lowly before speaking, “Does it matter?” 

It hurts you a little, how that’s even a question. He should know better than to ask that to you. 

“It matters to me, Satoru,” you sigh, “you know it does.”

You barely catch the way his brows furrow at your response, but there are creases on his blindfold that can’t be created by anything else. And Gojo knows—is so painfully aware of the way you care. 

Since coming back, he’s never felt like he’s fully returned. It’s an odd existence of in-between, like he breathes everything and nothing all at the same time. The emotions are even worse, overloading his senses with feelings he can never pinpoint. 

How does he tell you that he must be fucked in the head? That every second in his mind is another step closer to insanity? That he’s lost your tether on Satoru in pursuit of Gojo—of being a god? 

“I’ll tell you,” he starts, “but you have to look away.”

You’ve always treated Gojo tenderly, patiently, and he knows, without a doubt, that no matter what he says you will continue to do the same. But he can’t allow that, not anymore. Not after the way you looked at him that day.

“Okay,” you mutter, turning your head the other way. 

He breathes out and you can almost picture it: half-bitten lips and eyes like low tide. 

“I’m fine,” he says to the back of your head, “you have nothing to worry about.” 

A breeze picks up and brushes past your neck. It’s a lie. He knows it, knows you know it too, but—

it’s easier this way, he thinks, to give you answers when you’re not looking.

Gojo’s never found a weakness he can’t work around, but he might have just found one with you—in your eyes, that read through his every lie. If you turn around now, he’ll want to tell you everything.

“Satoru,” you whisper, letting his name fill the air. You get it—him, and even when you don’t, you try damn hard to because you refuse to let Gojo carry all of it on his own. 

There are crescent indents on your palm from squeezing your knuckles too hard. You think, is this how you form shallow cuts on your heart?

“It’s just me,” you continue, facing him when you say it. 

He takes you all in—your eyes that hold the city lights, your lips, the only vessel that handles his name so delicately. It’s that look on your face again and Gojo’s hit with an ache in his chest—the overwhelming truth that whatever it is, he feels the same. 

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.

.

There’s a secret Gojo keeps, one he’s certain he’ll never tell you: that when he looks at you upon his return and finds an emotion he refuses to name, he’s never felt so afraid.  

He takes in the shadows under your eyes and the sunkenness of your cheeks—the number of blinks it takes you to reign in tears on the brink of leaking. The way your voice shakes when you say his name.

Shoko tells him about it because she knows you never will—about how you’ve been running yourself dry, speeding through colonies to gather intel for any possible way to break the seal. She tells him about the sleepless nights, how she catches you standing outside his office at 3 a.m. before travelling to Utahime the next morning. 

And he cannot comprehend it at first, cannot understand how he’s caused you to crumble this way. 

If this is all because of him, how you’ve broken yourself all for his sake, he can’t allow it. To see you ruin yourself over him, over anyone ever—you deserve better.

So, when Gojo has love for the taking, he makes no move to reach for it; he cannot possibly take any more from you if this is what is left of you when he does. 

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“You’ve been avoiding me,” you catch him by the door of the conference room. 

Rebuilding an entire society requires work and apparently a lot of meetings. Gojo doesn’t usually go to most of them, leaving you and Utahime to carry the chunk of his attendance when he’s not there. In the rare times that he does show up, he makes it a point to be the last one in and the first one out. Utahime hates him for it but you don’t blame him—he isn’t exactly amicable with other figures of authority.

He pauses when he steps out of the door, hands in pockets as he turns to face you. 

You’re not mad or anything, just stating the fact. He’s always known you to speak this way. You lean against the wall next to you, keeping your arms crossed. More people continue to file out of the conference room, some eyeing the two of you curiously as they pass by.

Gojo glances at them, suddenly self-conscious as he clears his throat, “Right, I’ve been avoiding the paperwork you left in my office,” he emphasizes, practically announcing it to everyone in the vicinity, “let’s finish it now.” 

You don’t know whether it’s irritating that Gojo’s so terribly bad at acting, or comforting that he still can’t, for the life of him, successfully lie in front of you. 

He motions for you to follow him as he strolls down the hallway, but you intentionally lag a few steps behind, careful not to encroach on his space lest it make him avoid you any more than he already is.

Stepping into Gojo’s office after so long feels weird, like you belong here but only to a memory of it—as if closing the door behind you feels like activating a muscle you haven’t for a while. It’s been months after all. 

Your eyes skim over the entire room, zeroing in on the stacks of paper lined up on his desk; paperwork has always been Gojo’s least favorite part of the job, often leaving you to do them with him (or alone, when you’re feeling generous). Not much has changed in his space; the mini living area still exists to the left of the room, with little bits of you in its interiors—the pillows, the coffee table books. 

Gojo plops down on the sofa chair and props his feet up on the ottoman, giving four scrolls to his phone before pocketing it. He has the audacity to casually offer you the seat across from him, as if nothing’s wrong—as if he hasn’t been avoiding you for god’s sake. 

Ever since the rooftop, he’s canceled lunch with you six times for reasons that you’re now realizing are less likely to be true. He’s kept a distance of at least one person in between you at all times, and to this day, you still don’t understand why. 

You sigh, taking a seat and leaning back to cross your legs. 

“You’re so bad at acting.” you start.

Being with Gojo for so long, you’ve come to realize that there’s no point being angry with him when your heart can never take it. 

“I technically wasn’t lying.” he replies, sticking his index finger up. 

“Yeah, I can see that,” you snicker, nodding to his desk. 

It’s always like this with Gojo: he pulls you in and you follow. No matter the distance between you, when you sit down together like this, it still always flows so easily. The banter you’ve built together over a decade and more shines through no matter what state your relationship is in. 

Neither of you say anything until Gojo replaces his blindfold for his sunglasses, placing the piece of cloth on the coffee table. 

You break the silence. 

“Why have you been avoiding me?” you ask quietly. Gojo aches at that, how you still choose to regard him so kindly. 

Why has he been avoiding you? It’s a good question, completely valid with how he’s been treating you lately, but he could draw up every answer he has, all one million and one, and still not know what to say.

Gojo’s a pretty bad communicator; for how much he talks, he doesn’t really say much—and maybe that’s the root of all this. There are too many things he wants to say but can’t formulate in the right way. 

“If it’s something I did, can you at least let me know?” you continue. Gojo frowns, how can you be wronged yet still think of yourself as the one to blame? 

“Why do you do that?” he tuts, head tilting sideways as his hands dig deeper into his pockets. 

“Do what?” you furrow your brows, confused. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong, so don’t worry about it.” he says dismissively. 

You arch an eyebrow; he has it all mistaken. 

“Satoru, I’m not worried because I feel guilty,” you sit up, inching towards the edge of your seat, “I’m worried because you’re pushing me away.” your voice is level, but your pupils shake.

Something grips at his chest seeing you this way; together or apart, he seems to be the main contributor to your heartache. 

You wonder if confronting him like this is any good if he’s not going to say anything anyway. 

“If you want space, that’s okay, I get it, but,” you exhale, “at least just tell me why.” 

This entire time avoiding you, Gojo’s had you on his mind—the million and one. He’s come to terms with what he feels when you’re together, and how it amplifies when you’re not. 

It’s shitty of him to practically ghost you, not just in text but in real life too. But he’s thought about it logically, really, that removing himself from your life should be just like ripping off a bandaid—painful but quick. At least that way, you’d get over it fast. 

He’d been resigned to doing that and that was the plan—until now. 

All it takes is seeing that look in your eyes, and his resolve falls apart. 

“I can’t.” he speaks softly. 

What hurts the most is that beneath his sunglasses, his eyes still hold the sky. 

You think you want to cry. 

You take this as your answer and close your eyes, taking a deep breath before getting up to leave. If this is goodbye, you don’t want your last interaction to be an awkward memory of him watching you bawl in his office chair. 

You push yourself up with the armrest only to sit back down—because Gojo is right in front of you, blocking your way. His infinity is up but touching, a tingling sensation sweeping across your knees. 

“Wait,” he swallows, a franticness you’ve never seen before. His head stays down as he bites his lips, sunglasses hanging by his fingertips. You wonder what he wants to say, that even if it comes out messy, it’s okay. You want to tell him that it’s just you—that you’ll always want to hear it all anyway. 

What comes next is unlike any version of Satoru you have ever known—nervous and uncertain, almost like he’s afraid. He lowers himself, slowly coming down to his knees in front of you. A giant of a man so small in your presence. 

“I don’t know how.” he mutters, dropping his sunglasses to the floor. 

You blink once, twice, still surprised by what’s in front of you. Gojo has always towered above you, has always known how to do anything and everything so effortlessly without fail. 

Watching him now, with every inhale and exhale dragging in slow motion, you do your best not to startle him. 

“How to what?” you whisper, the moment so fragile. 

He looks up, eyes locking with yours. A reaction happens in that moment—the split second of all his thoughts collapsing into one. You see a clear sky, blue and bright as day, the Satoru he saves for you—while he sees you, with that look on your face, the one that he knows has always only meant love. 

The sincerity in your gaze overwhelms him—makes him look away before it becomes too much. Red blooms at the tips of his ears as he bites the inner corners of his lips, fingers grabbing at the fabric of his pants. You’re afraid he might run away again, but he doesn’t and stays right where you are. 

“You know…” he looks to the side, pouting, “whatever you do….”

“Like…?” you coax lightly, trying hard to hide the small smile forming on your lips. 

You wonder how many versions of Satoru you’ll meet in your lifetime, and if this one, shy and nervous, will be one you’ll fit into the crevices of your heart just like all the others. 

He grips his pants tighter, fabric bunching under his fingers, “When you hold my hand… those things. You get it.” 

And you do (get it), so you don’t push, taking whatever Gojo has to give you like you always have. 

The tension relieves from you slowly, comforted by the fact that at least he’s given you his reasons now (no matter how vague they still seem to be). That at least there are no non-answers this time. 

You tell yourself that it’s okay, that you’re content as long as Gojo’s in your life even without the possibility of becoming something more. 

“Ok—”

But there’s always one thing you forget about Gojo—

“So show me how.”

—in the moments you least expect it, he speaks the words that matter most. 

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.

.

You choose to show him slowly, gently, like the trickling introduction of water to a man who is first learning how to drink. 

In the first few weeks of you and Gojo readjusting to one another, he turns on his infinity again—but only when he gets close enough to touch you. Lunches together happen more often, dinners sometimes too. Then he puts his infinity down, indefinitely. 

For the most part, your relationship falls into the usual steps of your dynamic with Gojo; there’s no pressure for anything and he likes that, appreciates the time you’re giving him to learn things at his own pace. 

It grows organically that way: knuckles brushing as you both reach for the stapler, pinkies touching whenever you walk side-by-side during site visits—until you’re able to hold his hand fully again, leaving that little infinity between your palms for him to close (hopefully, one day). 

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.

The faculty room is cold, especially during winter. The heating system is never warm enough to keep your hands from shaking whenever you mix your morning coffee. 

“So loud so early,” Gojo saunters into the kitchen, hands in pockets as he approaches the pantry. 

You stop mixing, ceasing the clinking of the spoon against your mug. “How are you not freezing?” 

He shrugs, grabbing his box of (heavily sugared) cereal. “I guess I’m just hot.” he says, turning to wiggle his eyebrows.

You roll your eyes and set your coffee on the table, Gojo following with a bowl brimming with cereal and milk. 

Mornings usually consist of you and Gojo, with an occasional new hire who has an early class that day. Most of the time, it’s just you two though, with Shoko coming in much closer to lunch time already. 

“Want some?” he asks, holding out his spoon.

It’s routine—Gojo asks and you decline, choosing to save yourself from the cavities that he somehow manages to evade despite having a diet of 80% sugar. 

Today though, you’re feeling a little adventurous. 

You nod, opening your mouth. Gojo’s eyes widen, nearly dropping the spoon at your request. You see the flush of his cheeks and smile, corners of your mouth extending wider. The spoon is shoved to your mouth too quickly, almost like he’s embarrassed to feed you. 

“Too sweet,” you scrunch your face, swallowing down the copious amount of sugar you’ll feel for days. 

If there’s one thing you’ve learned about Gojo throughout this whole relationship trial period, he recovers from any state within a nanosecond. There’s no end to how shameless he can be. 

“Like me, right?” he winks.

“Sure,” you drawl sarcastically and Gojo smiles like it’s high praise. 

You sip your coffee slowly, revelling in the heat that flows down your throat.

“Can I have half of that?” you point to his bowl. Gojo looks at you, confused, but slides it over anyway.

What happens next is an abomination to Gojo’s eyes—pure absolute disgust: you pour half of his cereal into your coffee and mix, sipping and crunching on a few pieces every now and then. 

His face contorts into complete distaste, horror and revulsion in the way his mouth hangs open. 

“What are you doing? That’s gross!” he nearly yells, reaching over to bring your mug down. His hand covers yours for a moment, the contact still causing gallops in his heartbeat. 

You laugh, giggling as he processes what you’d wasted his cereal on. It honestly doesn’t taste that bad, you think. 

“You’re weird,” he says to you, the grin on his face uncontained. This morning, he feels fond, like the butterflies in his stomach are warm, tickling him from the inside. “Give me.” he motions to your mug. 

You hold it up for him to take a sip but he keeps his hand over yours when he tastes, sticking his tongue out once the bitterness of your coffee hits. You set the mug down, preparing to reach for your spoon, but he takes your hand in his, long fingers slotting right between yours, interlacing. 

Gojo doesn’t normally reach for your hand, much less interlace them together (a recent evolution to your hand-holding), but this feels nice, how your fingers fit right in the spaces of his. 

You turn to him, a shy smile on your face. The tips of his ears are blush red but he looks at you the same, “Your hands were cold,” he pouts, “is this– is this okay?” 

“Yeah, it’s warm. Thank you, Satoru.” you nod, beaming. And it’s not a competition but he hopes you see the light in his eyes, how it feels to be ignited within him only when he’s spending breakfasts like this with you. 

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.

Shoko asks what you are and you don’t know what to tell her other than you’re happy and it’s good. Gojo’s existence is loud and vibrant, easy to spot from miles away—but he cares for you discreetly, in the hand that gently rests on your lower back while crossing the street, and the seemingly unlimited supply of your favorite coffee when you have no recollection of restocking it ever. 

He gives you a new mug for Christmas, one with little cereals painted all over while you give him his own tube of hand cream that he claims always smells like you. 

During the faculty New Year celebration, you overhear one of the new hires make a move on Gojo. You aren’t bothered by it or anything, simply walking past to sip your sake by the couch. You can hear them talk a bit from the kitchen, but you try not to pry despite how curious you are about his response. 

Until—

“I’m taken,” you hear Gojo say bluntly. 

Everything rings in your ears after that. The countdown music is loud, but your heart beats louder; there are murmurs and footsteps around you, but only one man crouches down to check on you, glass of water in hand. 

You snap out of it and see blue, the sky—a familiar light; you don’t think you can control the smile on your face, the alcohol lowering your inhibitions to paint on something lovesick. 

And when he smiles back, pink lips stretching wide—oh your heart can’t take it. He places one hand on your knee, rubbing gently. You hear it faintly, how he asks if you’re okay, but all you can do is nod, words failing to express how you feel right now.  

The countdown starts. 3 — and you take his face in your hands, squishing his cheeks to an image of him on your phone from many, many years ago. 2 — you go closer and his eyes go wide, a mixture of panic and surprise, but soft at the same time. 1 — you lean in and his eyelids fall shut, his chest on rampage. Then it lands, there, on the tip of his nose: a delicate peck and the smell of sake mixed with mint (like the lip balm you always carry around in your pocket). 

When you pull away from him, you’re smiling the biggest he’s ever seen, and he can’t feel it from how numb his cheeks have become, but he’s doing the same. 

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.

.

That kiss to his nose serves as the catalyst to the months that follow: Gojo becomes more comfortable touching you now, and though he blushes every single time, there’s nothing to be ashamed of because you do too. Shoko can’t believe the slow burn this is taking you both, having watched this on the sides since you were both 22, but you think you like it—like the slow drizzle of honey on Gojo’s favorite breakfast waffles. 

“How is it?” you ask, watching as Gojo takes a big bite. 

“D Beft.” he replies, mouth full as he chews. You take the seat beside him and take a spoonful. 

“There’s a secret ingredient.” you say mischievously, wiggling your eyebrows. 

He swallows before he scoffs, “What?” cutting up another piece, “Love?” 

You’re surprised because he says it so casually, and Gojo’s never talked about love, has never even mentioned the word since this shift in your relationship. He realizes a beat late by the expression on your face and gets flustered, thinking immediately of ways to brush past it. 

You had meant to say that you used that infused sugar he buys whenever he goes to Kyoto, but… you suppose love works too. He should know by now, right? 

“If it is?” you whisper, pretending to stir your coffee. 

Gojo doesn’t know how to approach this, really, but he’s come too far to back out now. He clears his throat, mentally running through what he wants to say, then, “Good. ‘Cause that’s what I put in your coffee too.” 

You laugh and the tension dissipates; there are hearts in your eyes for how hard Gojo has tried after denying himself of this for so long. 

He stares at you—at the laugh lines by your eyes and the soft curves of your lips, the moment moving much too slow, stop motion in his mind. He’s drawn in until you’re all too close, a few centimeters from your noses touching. 

Your laughter dies and your cheeks feel like they’re on fire; he’s so close you think he might kiss you. The signs are there—his eyes scaling your face to focus on your lips, his tongue peeping ever so slightly to wet his lips. 

So you wait. 

But he doesn’t, because he moves away after wiping his thumb on the side of your mouth. Even though you know there was nothing there. 

Gojo continues to eat, blabbering about a site visit he’s assigned to next week, but you don’t miss the way his ears are fully red and how he’s biting his lips to death.

.

The tension this time is different; instead of a growing rift, you can’t seem to be close enough. Every time you part ways, he lets go of your hand more reluctantly—as if he wants to say more, do more, but stops himself while he still can. 

When he leaves for missions, you kiss his cheek, pull him in by the hand and linger there, shyly. He gets embarrassingly red but tries to cover it up by telling you not to miss him too much (even though you know you will, and he knows he’ll miss you more). 

Your near-kisses with Gojo happen more frequently, and it comes to a point where he even manages to land one on your forehead, while you fall asleep next to him on his office couch. 

It’s driving you crazy, this tension—the mixed signals of it all. You try to kiss him a few times on the lips, but he evades them each time. You’ve caught Gojo staring at your lips more times than you can count; if that isn’t a sign, you don’t know what is. 

Now that Gojo thinks about it, he’s come so far yet the prospect of kissing you properly still scares him. What if he fucks up? Doesn’t do it right? What if it’s not how he wants you to be kissed? 

There’s that secret Gojo will never tell you, of how seeing that look on you has never gotten him more afraid. And he’s worked through that now, but it’s evolved into something else: how Gojo is now afraid of love, more than anything else, not because of loss but because he might not know how. 

And kissing you, loving you this way—he’s never done it before, doesn’t know how to make you feel love without his lips shaking and heart palpitating; how to do it while letting you know he feels the same. 

.

It happens during an assignment out of town. Curses aren’t as bad as they used to be, but they’re still stronger than what any of the available sorcerers right now can handle. 

You don’t remember the last time you saw Gojo use his technique that way—almost forgotten how powerful and ruthless he can be. Every time since, holding your hand, keeping you close—he’s just been your Satoru. 

Your apartment for the weekend is a two-bedroom unit with one bathroom and a decently sized living area and kitchenette; Gojo always chooses the room in front of the bathroom because he tends to wake up in the middle of the night to pee (information you know from your many other assignments with him before). Still, going as what you are now—it feels different. 

There’s a charged air between you as you move around the unit; you make your nightly tea while Gojo looks through the groceries for some crackers. It’s peaceful and quiet—domestic almost, but there are goosebumps on your skin for reasons you can’t explain. Being around Gojo lately has felt that way.

He brushes past you to throw the finished packet of crackers and the feeling intensifies; it’s not awkward, just tense, like anticipation sitting deep in your bellies, waiting on each other to make the first move. 

He announces that he’ll use the bathroom first, if you don’t mind, and you motion for him to go ahead. Your mind is fuzzy and having Gojo around seems to only make it worse.

When you walk past the bathroom and straight to your room, you hear Gojo humming that soft pop tune from a popular girl group on the radio earlier. You giggle, thinking it’s sweet—how he sings obnoxiously around everyone else but is admittedly pretty good when it’s just him, alone. 

You still have the rest of the weekend in this area, having agreed to monitor the site and any nearby locations for other suspicious activity, but at least the worst of it is over (maybe just to you though; Gojo hates paperwork). 

The sound of running water stops and you hear the bathroom door swing open. You don’t see Gojo when you exit your room but he leaves the door open to release any remaining steam.

There’s a reason why people say showers are good for the mind. You’re happy for those who’ve found it, but that couldn’t be you, because the only thought plaguing your head right now is Gojo—and whether you should greet him goodnight, if you should kiss his cheek or hug him tight. The tension between you now is palpable, an electric current waiting to zap on both ends. 

Your mind is so out of it that you don't realize you’re missing your skincare bag until after you finish brushing your teeth and dressing for bed. You open the bathroom door with the sole intention of going back to your room to get it, but instead, you’re met with a wall of chest.

Gojo’s eyes are wide, bright blue with damp strands of white falling like curtains barely shielding the sky. He’s just as surprised as you are, toothbrush in his hand as you hold up the towel wrapped around your head. 

You’ve seen Gojo in his pajamas many times before—white long sleeves with gray cotton pants, but your eyes trail to his collarbones and the way the bathroom lights cast it under a soft glow. The redness on his cheeks, a visual manifestation of the heat on yours. 

Gojo can’t stop staring at your lips, at how soft they look—at how soft you look fresh out of the shower. The little baby hairs sticking out under your towel are cute, and he leans in without knowing—a pull he can’t seem to resist. For once in his life, Gojo’s mind is still. 

You try to meet him halfway, tiptoeing, but you’re a little out of your element; you don’t know where to put your hands and your heart’s about to explode out of your chest. When your noses touch, you can’t breathe, closing your eyes while you wait for it. 

But it doesn’t come. 

You feel Gojo’s breath stilling before speeding up into little exhales. Something is wrong. You open your eyes and find him staring back at you, a version of Gojo you haven’t seen in a while—that you rarely see ever, except that day during your confrontation in his office. 

Concern laces your features and you move back a little, hands coming up to caress his cheeks. His eyes still look frantic, but they focus on you when you cup his face so gently. 

“Satoru,” you whisper, voice grounding. His breaths slow down a little. 

You realize that it must be true then, what they say, that those who love to be feared, fear to be loved, because you’ve never seen anyone afraid of something so good as Gojo is of this. 

“Satoru,” you repeat, massaging his temples with your thumb, “we don’t have to if you don’t want to.” 

Gojo hates it, how you’ve always had to adjust for him. He hates that he can’t give you this one thing, hates that you’re still so patient, that he’s still so afraid. He swallows, closing his eyes tight before opening them again. 

“I want to,” he chokes out, “I just don’t know—”

You chuckle, without judgment, “I don’t either,” you lean forward, foreheads touching, “but do you want to try together?”

You learn that Gojo sees himself so differently from how you do—and maybe that’s everyone, but Gojo tends to say things while doing the other. He says he can’t bother with kids, but continues to take so many of them under his wing anyway; he calls your cereal concoction disgusting but tastes it regardless; and he says he can’t think about love, doesn’t know how, but proceeds to try so much harder, everyday. 

When you look at Gojo, you see a heart so big, so capable, that he can’t see it himself. 

You nudge his nose with yours and he breathes deeply, closing his eyes once again. If he doesn’t do this now, how much longer ‘till he does? 

Gojo hums before nodding his head slightly. His hands come up to cover yours, toothbrush wedged in the spaces between his fingers; they’re clammy, he’s sure, but he’s kept you waiting long enough. 

When you kiss Gojo for the first time, everything trembles—his pupils, his lips, the breath he takes. It’s all shaky and nervous, but your lips touch and all you know is that you like it there. He’s a little bit stiff but you don’t mind, pressing closer just for a little bit before pulling away. 

Gojo keeps your hands in place, half-lidded eyes staring at you lazily. His ears are fully red now but he’s giving you a look you’ve never seen before—like lightning crackling in the gaps between his eyelids. 

When you kiss Gojo for the first time, you don’t expect it to be by the bathroom door of a rented apartment, while away on a mission. You don’t expect it to be in your pajamas, towel wrapped around your hair as you’re getting ready for bed. You definitely don’t expect him to guide your hands down his neck while he places his on your lower back, squeezing lightly before pulling you in to kiss you again. 

This time, his lips move more pliantly, parting yours slightly; he tastes mint, mixed with the strawberry candy he had earlier and it’s nothing he could have ever imagined before, but is now everything he’s ever wanted. The push and pull between you is magnetic, soft lips and the intermingling of held breaths. All Gojo can think of now is to take, to devour—to keep you with him, like this, always. 

You wonder if Gojo is lying—that he’s never done this before, because you don’t think you can kiss anyone after this and not think of his lips on yours. 

By the time you part, the air is significantly warmer. Your fingers thread through the hair at the base of his neck and you smile, sighing. Gojo looks warm, with his swollen lips and flushed cheeks. 

“That…” you trail off, nudging his nose. 

Gojo looks at you fondly; to ever even think he could have this now, with you—he doesn’t believe in any higher being but you must be his prayer come true. 

“We can practice a bit more, I think.” he pulls you closer, hands gripping your hips. 

You feel it against you, something solid and firm against your stomach and your eyes go wide at the realization; Gojo does the same. 

“Satoru, you–” he moves back and freezes, untangling himself from you completely. There’s a faint outline on the crotch of his pants and your whole face goes red. 

“Let me use the bathroom real quick.” he panics, rushing past you and closing the bathroom door. 

You stand there stunned for a good minute before you shake out of it, laughing. Gojo yells about how you’re being so mean, making fun of him when he’s like this, but you aren’t—not really. 

It’s been a long time getting to this point with Gojo, but considering all things, you think, this might just be the beginning.

thank you notes: i would also like to shoutout @stellamancer for leaving such lovely comments on dybil that it actually kinda pushed me to write this longer piece connected to it!!

comments, tags, and reblogs are greatly appreciated ♡

[onlyseokmins]

The tag looks so cute aw 🥺

Your Choice was your intro to Seventeen? I love finding out when people got into groups. You chose a pretty solid year to get into them, especially as a DK stan lmao. He just ate that year tbh. I remember everyone losing their minds over him (rightfully so).

Dino has been yelling in my ear since I got into Seventeen 💀 but I will admit it got worse during Rock With You. Like we all know that was his era but, every since then he's been so much worse, god. I don't even want to unpack 2022 Dino. It's not good for me.

WHY DO YOU ENJOY MAKING ME SUFFER? I don't like to think about that photoshoot with Joshua. I enjoy my peace.

I'm so glad! Ur adorable mwah <3

Yeah it was! A little bit after tho I think I was it was a month after promos or smth haha but a good time to get into them haha oh and that's sooo funny ahsjksk when did you get into them?

That's so very valid, he can be SO loud sometimes - he was like my... 4th bias I think? Hahahahahaha I'm sure you do, I too love to not think abt how devastating Joshua can be... 2nd bias still going strong at times 😭

[simp4ace]

☁️SO... im Aris (he/him) and im 15 (yes im a child). im a guy... most of the time at least, im kinda genderfluid. I mostly like boys but girls r so pretty too <33 my orientation is a mess so imma just say that I'm an aromantic that loves romantic physical attention 👽 therefore i cant really write anything thats actually romantic... 😔

...Therefore I spend my time in class writing small drabbles on my social and political studies book.

I love listening to Arctic Monkeys while daydreaming about Ace and other sweethearts from fictional worlds in modern AUs. In other words I'm projecting 😎😎

OTHER THAN THAT- I love Jojo, noragami, assassination classroom and one piece among others SO MUCH I COULD BE WRITING ESSAYS ABT THEM. I'm also familiar with genshin Impact and its pretty boys 😳

So yeha that was my introduction 🙏🙏🙏 it'd actually the first time I'm an "anon" on a blog, so I can guess that ur just too cool 💪💪 I fell in love with ur blog I'm staying here to send imagines and drabbles if u don't mind me😔😩

Ariss hiii❣❣❣ omg your bio is sooo cool???!!! ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞ • *✰ idk why but I have a feeling we could get along well if we met irl hehe :333 there's a lot in common, not everything but mostly yess XDD I'd love to tell you a bit about myself too if it's ok ( ˶ˆᗜˆ˵ ) (since the official bio I put in my blog is pretty cringed imma delete it after this and might do another ahhh ;u;)

gonna put everything under the cut cuz I don't wanna disturb anyone's dashboard <33

Sooo hello again, I'm Rin (she/her). I just turned 19 2 months ago, but I'm still a child at heart who is not ready for her 20s yet;u; idk I'm scared of growing up dfhjvdfhjv

I'm a hopeless romantic, but when a guy hit on me I got scared and run away lmaoo, and run back to my small imagination world where I feel much safer... you can tell I'm a nerd or a coward, either way (╥﹏╥) but then I also crave for romantic physical attention, it's just complex you know;o; oh yeah, and I'm touch starved, like, very...

therefore!!! therefore, all the love scenes I've written so far are just my mere imagination haha I haven't had any experience yet XDDD just like you, I also love writing headcanons and drabbles in class hehe(i'd love to do anything in class but study ;) ), I listen to Lana Del Rey's songs for inspiration tho, cuz as I said I know nothing about real love:>>>>

AND OHH WHEN YOU SAID YOU LOVE DAYDREAMING ABOUT FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN MODERN AU, bro, I know we could be bestieeeee 😳😳😳 no because I'm a sucker for modern au too!!! especially high school au omg omg omggg!!! and especially if that fictional character has a tragic life in the manga??? oh no they deserve a happy life in our modern-day!!!! idk why I'm always so attached to tragic characters??? and tragic stories ;u; I like fluff the most don't get me wrong, but sometimes I just want a good cry and a good heartbreak💔

My favorite manga atm are One Piece, Attack on Titan (cuz tragic), Nana (cuz tragic, also :')) Kingdom (tragic...) Demon Slayer (crying tho T-T) Welcome to Demon school Iruma-kun (oh hey this one is not tragic, very wholesome) and Spy x Family (the cutesttttt) AND OMG I LOVE ASSASSINATION CLASSROOM TOO FDHVJBDFHJV I CRIED BRO I CRIED A LOT JVHBDFHJVB😭😭😭😭 I dropped Noragami a while ago to wait for more chapters, gonna come back to it someday :>>> and Jojo oh Jojo :'(((((( don't know why I can't find a website to read Jojo online??? I'm upset! I don't really like watching anime, especially a whole series cuz I'm lazy af so <///3 I still watch anime tho, I love Studio Ghibli and basically any 90s movie 🥰🥰🥰 do you like Studio Ghibli's movie? :>

Hmmm anything else about me?

Oh right, I have an unhealthy obsession with platform shoes, I love Japanese fashion in general, and uh my attention span and my memory span are really short

I'm living in a hell of homework, deadlines, exams, and housework atm, so sometimes I will disappear for days. I apologize in advance if it takes me long to respond :<<< also I'm not an English speaker so I might make lots of mistakes ahhh I hope you don't mind :>

Thank you for reaching out and talking with me, Aris 💖💖💖 I appreciate you and anytime I see your message I just can't help but smile a lot SO YES PLEASE DO SEND ME DRABBLES AND HCS AND THEORY AND WHATEVER YOU LIKE EVEN JUST SILLY CHAT BBY I LOVE TALKING TO YOU:333 you're always welcome here I love youuuu💞💞💞

P/s: Knowing that I'm the first blogger you anon to is really really touching you have no idea 😤😤😤 I have been smiling to myself all evening djhfvbdfhvjbdvdb

[lunarmothmann]

finally watched the roller coaster safety tutorial so here were my thoughts throughout

~OBVIOUSLY SPOILERS FOR RIDE THE CYCLONE IF YOU HAVENT SEEN IT BUT I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT~

- VIRGIL. HE PLAYS BASS. I LOVE HIM.

(its a bit of a mess so bear with me)

- how the hell did they make Jane look headless in the intro, thats so cool

- the expressions on everyone's faces when Jane is introduced is hilarious

- OCEAN AND HER WHITE GIRL DANCE MOVES

- i hate that they got rid of Ocean's riff at the end of What The World Needs

- Karnak is the expert of giving information just a little too late

- BORTHDAY.

- "your cousin was in grade 4, he had to get his stomach pumped" is unironically funny

- GIVE JANE A HUG ISTG SHE HAS HER ARMS HELD OUT AND EVERYTHING

- i think Noel might be a masochist, just saying-

- Noel's life is honestly really sad. I feel so bad for him

- NOT HIM CALLING OCEAN A SUCCUBUS LMAO

- ngl he makes the dress work

- MISCHA??? HELLO??? THATS KINDA FRUITY

- that chair is a paid actor bc its been through so much in just this number alone

- HELP CONSTANCE TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM JANE IS SO FUNNY

- "not in my Bible, baby. BONSOIR" I am struggling so hard to keep my composure while typing

- THE HIP THRUST WHEN OCEAN SAYS "teen sex KILLS"

- THE PORN MUSIC. HELP ME IM DYING OUT HERE

- "im not mad at you, im just frequently disappointed" you know what I felt that

- I dont agree with them saying Mischa as the angriest boy in town, he was just mistreated and had a hard life :( he has so many nice moments with the other kids

- OCEAN AND HER FAN THAT ISNT EVEN TURNED ON-

- seeing Mischa talk abt Talia makes me so sad

- Talia is such an underrated song, this makes me wanna sob

- idk why but Ocean touching Mischa's cheek at the start of Talia did something to me I cannot explain

- the projections are making this so emotionally distressing to watch

- THEN THE FUCKING UPBEAT POP SECTION

- CONSTANCE'S GUILTY LOOK AT THE VIRGIN LINE

- oh god here comes Space Age Bachelor Man

- DID RICKY STICK HIS FINGER IN OCEAN'S MOUTH????

- what the hell i am so uncomfortable

- I hate those cat masks so much

- "it gets weird" ITS BEEN WEIRD WHAT

- WHAT IS HE WEARING. im not even gonna talk abt the fake abs.

- this choreography is so sexually charged and im so confused

- Jane makes me so unbelievably sad why cant they treat her better

- no comments, just The Ballad of Jane Doe.

- ok one comment, the ACTING. the VOCALS. ITS ALL PERFECT.

- THE BIRTHDAY SCENE IS SO SWEET LIKE THEY ARE TRYING TO MAKE JANE FEEL BETTER

- the new birthday song 🥺

- Jane's little sway aww

- BORTHDAY PT 2

- Savannah with the greenest eyes 😭

- THE BOOB PUNCH. "you just punched me!! in the freakin boob!!"

- Constance's favorite ride was the one that killed her :(

- IM SORRY CONSTANCE DID WHAT?

- THE TATTOO WAS WHAT????

- oh no this is so sad

- the impromptu dance moves during sugar cloud bc they arent being controlled by Karnak are so cute

-Ocean's white girl dance moves pt 2

- RECORDER SOLO WOOHOO

- OCEAN SOUNDS SO BROKEN WHEN KARNAK TELLS HER ITS HER DECISION TO MAKE THE FINAL VOTE

- "you knew all along I couldn't do it" "what?" "choose myself" IM DYING OUT HERE HELP

- "id gladly take my seventeen years over nothing" WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME

- the sad little "democracy rocks"

- is the video meant to show Jane's life as she crosses over? or is it just showing imagery of life overall bc of the theme of this show

- It's Just a Ride after everything I just witnessed is like a punch in the gut

- they seem so happy :,)

- im in physical pain over this show.

[raplinesmoon]

The Test Kitchen (KSJ x Reader!)

❅ Holiday in Handcuffs ❅ hosted by @bangtanbathhouse

⤖ Spaces: [8I,3I,3J, 10G, 10H]

Pairing: Husband!Kim Seokjin x YouTuber!Reader

Genres: floof

AUs: established relationship, holidays AU

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: oc breaks glass, some kissing, otherwise super cute fluff

Ratings: G

Summary: Tiktok made you do it… again. Luckily Jin is there to help you have some fun in the kitchen.

A/N: It's basically December, so I can post this... right? I had this cute idea for husband Jin lovingly helping his YouTuber spouse with their cooking channel, and it was so cute I think I nearly died writing it. This is based on my favorite Youtube channel, Rachhloveslife, who does tons of vids testing out hacks with her absolutely adorable husband! Srsly, they’re goals and you all should watch them for a smile. Thank you to the wonderful Moon (@lavienjin) for looking this over for me <3 I hope you enjoy! 🥺 Lots of love, Isi 💜 Banner made by me.

Taglist: @jinpanman @sunshinerainbowsbts @joheunsaram @kithtaehyung @jjksblackgf @minyfic

“Helloooo my lovely people, it’s December and you all know what that means! It’s basically the most wonderful time of the year!” you accentuate your intro with jazz hands as you slide on the red Santa hat you’d dug out of the basement especially for this video.

“And everyone, look-, look, I decorated!! Just to get in the holiday spirit!” you excitedly gesture to the string lights and tinsel you’d hung up for the video, paling when you realize half your string had gone out and was now dangling limply from the cabinets.

“Or, at least I tried. You know, because holiday cheer is all about spirit anyway! A for effort.”

Nice save.

“Now, today, I’m very excited because we’re going to be diving into the vast world that is holiday Tik Tok. A world that, until recently, I didn’t know existed, until my husband showed me all these cute little DIYs and recipes and decorating hacks. You guys, I AM OBSESSED. So I thought it’d be fun to try out a bunch of different recipes for you guys, and of course, we’ll have Jin come in and try them too!”

Speaking of Jin, you had a long day of filming ahead, and he was supposed to be arriving any second with your daily cup of Dalgona coffee. As a native, he’d initially been all grumpy and grumbly when the trend had hit the interwebs, mumbling under his breath that it wasn’t even “authentic” to traditional Korean dalgona.

A few trials later, and the two of you had become hooked on the sweet, foamy beverage. You made Jin eat his words as he got up every morning to prepare the two of you a cup before heading off to his office to work from home in a crisp white dress shirt and fleece pyjama bottoms.

Hearing him pad into the kitchen with two cups, you smile as he slides you your cup out of the camera’s eagle-eyed view.

“Madam, your coffee,” he smirks with a whisper.

“Okay, now that I have been deemed caffeinated, it’s time to spread some Christmas cheer! And I feel like now, more than any other holiday season, we really need a bit of cheer. So come on and cosy up, grab some fuzzy socks or a blanket, maybe grab a mug of tea, or maybe even hot chocolate, ooooh that sounds so good right now. Also this hat, this hat is getting very hot, and I’m wearing fleece pyjamas and the heat is on and let’s just not talk about the poor planning here and jump right into it!”

Jin shoots you a warm smile before taking a seat at your kitchen table behind the camera. As a raging introvert, sometimes having a bubbly YouTuber for a wife was a lot to handle. But his favorite days of the week were the times he got to sit down and help you test and film and edit. His heart always fluttered at seeing you so passionate and invested in doing what you loved, and bringing joy to your hundreds of thousands of subscribers.

“So for recipe #1, we’re gonna be making these shortbread cookies, but they’re not just shortbread cookies. Look everyone, they’re also little lids!! Like these cute little lids that you could just put on a mug of hot chocolate to keep it warm! How genius is that?”

Jin had a couple of questions about the shortbread cookies. He was doubtful that 1) they’d be as cute and adorable as Tik Tok made them seem (the app had a bad habit of overselling anything and everything), and 2) whether they’d actually keep anything warm without turning into a soggy mess. For now though, he’d just sit back and enjoy the way your eyes widened and lit up over the recipe in question.

“Now, to begin, we’re gonna roll out some dough,” you grunt, as your ball of shortbread dough smacks onto the counter with a satisfying thunk!

“Does this rolling pin in my hand make me look menacing?” you ask the camera, but really you were asking Jin.

Jin shakes his head vehemently. You were too cute, you couldn’t even be scary if you tried.

Your shoulders drop and you pout slightly at his response, but decide to keep chugging along.

“So the funny thing about shortbread actually, is that baking it during the holidays is kind of a tradition in my family. My dad had this really good shortbread recipe that he used to make when I was a kid with lemon zest, rosemary, and orange zest. I remember I got so upset one year because when Jin and I had just started dating, his parents taught us both how to make songpyeon for Chuseok, and the same year, my dad taught Jin the holiday shortbread recipe but not me! I threw such a fit, and my dad was like, “you’ll just have to keep Jin around so he can teach you one day.”

Jin remembers your first holidays together like it was yesterday. Although it had been a whirlwind, flying to Korea for Chuseok and staying there for a few weeks, and then flying back to spend the holidays with your family, he wouldn’t have traded your sleepy, puffy cheeks and jet-lagged cuteness for anything. That was the first time he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you.

“And now, I couldn’t find a cookie cutter that fit my mugs perfectly, so I’m just gonna use this glass bowl to stamp out the shapes,” you hold it both hands, palms flared outwards, showcasing the glass bowl as though it were the most precious artifact.

Jin’s eyes widen as your hands slip, and the bowl wobbles, tumbling into the air. Poised and ready, he darts into the frame, pushing you out of the way of the falling glass as it falls to the ground and shatters into hundreds of tiny crystalline pieces.

He looks up to see your despondent face as you take in the disastrous sight, reaching over his broad frame to cut the camera.

“We can always edit that out,” he says gently, noticing how tears glisten and cling to your lashes.

“I’m always so clumsy,” you sob, wrapping your arms around him and burying your head into his chest. “I can’t even hold a bowl straight, I ruin everything!”

Jin learned the hard way that filming recipes for YouTube meant more than your fair share of kitchen disasters, often resulting in the air smelling like burnt dough, or the stand mixer going haywire, causing batter to hit the walls. No matter how many times you edited it out with the “oh no no no” sound from Tik Tok, he knew you took each little failure to heart, lamenting at how you couldn’t be like those aesthetic influencers you saw scrolling on your phone every day.

“People love you because you’re real, baby, not because you’re perfect,” he presses a kiss to your hair. “Accidents happen. What matters is that no one got hurt.”

He smooths your hair and gives you another kiss, running to your supplies closet to grab a broom. Sweeping up the evidence of your transgression, he gives you a wide smile and reaches to take your hand in his, wiping the smudged mascara from under your eyes.

“Now, let’s roll the camera. We have some cookies to bake, don’t we?”

“Okay guys, we are back! And recovered from our little mishap,” you chuckle. “Just to recap, while we were away, Jin helped me finish up the cookies and put them in the oven! And now, we are gonna get started on the next recipe, which are these adorable peppermint spoons to go with our cookie lids!”

“So this recipe is from Tiktok," you recall, “but my mom actually does this at home using chocolate during Christmastime with our little nieces and nephews!! So, you know, maybe if this hack turns out to be a success, Jin and I can incorporate it with our little ones someday!”

Sputtering as he takes a sip of water right when the words come out of your mouth, the tips of Jin’s ears turn red. Yet another holiday season where the whole family would ask about when you were planning on having kids. It wasn’t that he didn’t want kids, of course. Jin’s heart swelled at the thought of you, him, and a little baby, making pancakes on a Sunday morning, the small squeals and giggles along with the clapping of tiny hands. But there was no pressure in his mind. You were both still young, and enjoying each other’s company. Children could come later.

“So I got these crushed up spoon moulds from Amazon,” you continue on, “but that’s not the cool thing. Look what I found!”

You hold up the bag of crushed up candy canes. You’d jumped up in delight when the two of you had gone shopping together for this video, not even excited about the hack, but more excited to tell the world about the amazing new revelation that was crushed up peppermint.

Now, all you had to do was sprinkle them into the mould and pop them into the oven, and then your viewers would love these cute spoons that took no effort at all.

“I was just thinking,” you ponder, “these are so easy, you could totally make them, and package them up with a cute little mug, and maybe some hot cocoa mix and give it to friends. We should totally do that! Right, Jin?”

Looking beyond the camera, you see Jin nod and give you a thumbs up. You’re unsure whether he’s agreeing with your suggestion or merely telling you that you’re doing great, but you don’t mind his encouragement either way.

“Jin is too shy to talk right now, but he agrees with everyone. So don’t steal this gift idea from me!” you joke.

Finishing up the candy spoons, you pop them into the oven and cut the camera once more, happy that this hack seems to be working out so far.

“Nice recovery,” Jin says from behind you. “I told you everything would be okay, didn’t I?”

“I know,” you sigh, “but I always make you say it every time. I somehow can’t believe my own brain, but totally melt from the encouragement from my awkward, dorky husband.

“Omg, melt?!” you nudge his arm. “Do you get it?”

“Babyyy,” he tugs on your arm, grinning as he pulls you away from the counter. “You’ve been working so hard since you got up. Let’s take a break and eat. I made some kimbap yesterday, and we can play some Mario to unwind before we start filming again.”

Jin has barely finished persuading you to come along when you lean over and press a kiss to his pink lips, his face flushing at your bold actions.

“Lead the way, handsome.”

“AAAND NOWWW, for the grand finale! It’s a Christmas miracle!” you yell, gesturing to the side as if you’re presenting a magic act. “Everyone, after months of persuading, I have finally convinced, the one, the only, my darling husband, Kim Seokjin to join us for our taste test!”

“Everybody give him a big round of applause,” you jump up and down, making crowd noises with your mouth as Jin awkwardly stumbles into the frame, greeting the camera with a small wave.

You usher Jin over, proudly presenting your hot chocolate themed creations to him. He takes in the scene, his chest swelling in pride as he takes in your cute cookie lids, peppermint spoons, and the ever famous Tik Tok hot chocolate bombs that he’d helped you frantically finish after the two of you spent too much time lazing around, playing Mario Kart.

With a glint in his eyes, he nods his head, his eyes glancing over at the pile of dishes that rest in the sink. You let out a tiny gasp, catching onto his mischief, and slowly press a finger to your lips and let out a small “shhh!”. Not even one minute into his camera debut, and his chaotic side was already making an appearance.

“I had a crazy thought,” Jin blurts out. “What if we put the hot milk on these chocolate bombs, and it just turns into a big gloopy mess? That seems pretty likely.”

“Jiiinnnn,” you whine. “Everybody, tell my husband to stop being a pessimist just because he’s the better cook.”

You grab the measuring cup full of hot milk, and drop a hot chocolate bomb into two mugs, one for you, and one for Jin. Pouring the milk into each cup, you feel your breath hitch, Jin’s heavy breathing behind you, as both of you wait for the long awaited surprise.

“I-, wait, oh, I see it-, oh,” your voice drops, taking in the melted chocolate that looks more like sludge at the bottom of the cup.

“I guess it kinda worked,” Jin scrutinizes. “But let’s be real, drinking this would clog our arteries. So it looks like all our efforts were in vein!! Get it?”

He guffaws, nudging your shoulder as giggles escape you too, the both of you doubled over in laughter from his dad jokes.

Still, determined to save this, you reach over and grab one of the peppermint spoons, stirring the hot liquid with it. You let out a tiny “oops” as half of the spoon completely melts away, dropping into the sweet liquid, and turning it an even more unappetizing color.

“Well folks,” you say, looking up at the camera with a smirk, “we struck out on 2 out of 3 of these recipes. Now, for the grand finale, will these cookie lids work?”

They look cute enough, you think, as you grab one of them from the baking tray, plopping it on top of the cup.

“Aaaand salvaged!” Jin announces, hand meeting yours in a high five. “They had us in the first half, not gonna lie, but my amazing wife manages to make everything work.”

“And there you have it folks,” you declare, wrapping up the video. “Tik Tok baking hacks that kind of, semi-worked? That was more anticlimactic than I thought it’d be, but we had so much fun! See you all in the next video!”

You reach over to turn to press the button to stop recording, but not before Jin’s “Aish, kids these days” sneaks into the A-roll.

“Ugh," you groan, rubbing your temples. “I was so excited for some of those, I thought they’d work! There’s like hundreds of videos on Tik Tok about them!”

“It’s not you baby,” Jin wraps his arm around your waist. “They’re just bad recipes that somehow happened to go viral. Maybe next time we should bake some of the recipes from your family cookbook? And I can ask my mom for some of hers. I’m sure the viewers would love that.”

“You know,” you sigh, a sleepy yawn interrupting your train of thought. “That’s not a bad idea. My dear Jinnie, you always know what to say to make me feel better.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” he says softly, pressing a kiss to your cheek. “Now, I think someone is a little tired, don’t you think? Let’s go to bed.” He supports his weight, the two of you lumbering up the stairs sleepily to your cosy bedroom, changing into your matching flannel pyjamas.

As he listens to your quiet snores, Jin looks out the window, silently watching the snow fall outside, painting a magical scene in your front yard amongst the twinkling lights. Soon enough, there’d be another day waiting for the two of you in the test kitchen. In his heart, he knew this holiday season would be your best yet.

A/N pt 2: Thanks so much for reading! As always, any comments or feedback are much appreciated, but I appreciate you all anyway <3

[stormblessed95]

Winter Package 2020 Part 2

My thoughts and commentary as I watch Winter Package 2020 part 2! There is only the one making DVD in this package (92 minutes long). The other part of this was just the photobook and extra merch. Reminder that these are just my thoughts, it's not very organized. You get me typing it out as I go like I'm reacting to a friend. Somewhat like a bullet point format in a way. Love these packages! You can read Part 1 here.

The second half of winter package is kicking off with video journals at the end of the day 2 in the saunas. Just all recounting their day. Tae did his outside the sauna, he didn't like it in there lol. Namjoon is going to make me cry though! He is just still worried about JK who cried earlier while doing the letters to ARMY. "Jungkook-ah, if you are watching, know that I believe in you and I'm always rooting for you. I'll always have a hug ready for you." JOON 😭😭 My namkook heart is not okay!!

On their car ride, Tae tried to suggest a game which somehow instead turned into everyone singing his Jump Verse at him 😂😂 they had to get on a car ferry to get to Suomenlinna and Jimin was worried about Hobi who gets seasick really easy 🥺 my heart. He said he would be okay though. 🥺 Jihope!

First shooting is for the group shot! Lol and Jimin calls out to Jin all sweetly, who answered by calling him "JK" by accident. The giggles 😂 Jinjikook having trouble not laughing after that too lol. Jimin then getting all up close and personal with the camera, JK noticing and shouting after him "stop, Jimin! Stop!" Well the lack of honorifics there, sir. And the lack of scolding you got for the completely informal way of speaking to your hyung! Lol not even jokingly scolded! Just totally normalized behavior!

Moving to their next location, JK jokingly "why do you keep following me?" Jimin, jokingly pretending not to hear him while totally keeping exact pace with Jungkook to keep them walking together 😂 JKs smile at him 🥺🥺 Jin, Jimin and Hobi all fighting for solo GCF shots 🤣 its constant chaos with them! JK joining everyone's solo shoots for a bit this time for his solo shooting for GCF. His little "he looks good" "wow he is handsome" comments for NamJin. 🥺 their winter package looks are all soooo amazing. Like some of my FAVORITES for all of them. Stunning!

The last group shot, the staff telling Jimin to put his arm around JK and Jungkook then sweetly singing "put your hand around my shoulders" as he leans back into Jimin. 🥺 more GCF shooting, Jiminie this time and the captions "Jungkooks favorite model appears" and Jimin saying he just keeps wanting to be goofy for the camera. And how he keeps sneaking into the background of his scenery shots and in the back of Tae's solo shoot too. "I want to be in every scene you are filming" 🤣

The staff during the vminkook unit shoot, as Jimin is leaning down for some intense eye contact with JK, "Please don't look at each other" Jimin's giggles as he looks up 😂 (photo of that moment up under the post intro). Jimins flirty approach to JK, just for the classic turn around move. Tae walking up to Jimin just for Jimin to go "wow you are so handsome." Ugh, this trio has my heart! I love this moment. The power they hold as unit!!

Finally, indoor shooting!! Warmth! Lol Tae, joon, and JK doing a unit shoot together. All snuggled up on the couch. JK asking if Tae washed his hair or not and then smelling it? Lmao! I hope he passed your sensitive nose sniff test 😅 they are cute. Joon sitting on JKs lap. JK being squished between TaeJoon, literally going "I'm being crushed" lol and them laughing at him 😂 I might need to make a post just about these 3 together during this winter package. I'm dying at the cuteness.

Everyone excited about the scenery outside! Jin, Hobi, Yoongi and Jimin doing their unit shoot. When walking to their spots though, JinMin were holding hands so cutely. And then Jihope did cute little dramatic spins together too. And the JinMin back hug. Jimin you are overloading everyone on love right now!! And then JK giving his camera to film and take pictures over to Jimin to shoot for him. Even directing him a bit on how to use it and to keep changing where he is standing for varied shots. So that he can get film of his unit shoot with TaeJoon. 🥺 I talk about why JK handing off his camera to Jimin and what only looks like a select few staff is worth noting to me, in this post here.

They all spent what looks like such a nice dinner together. All the giggles as JinJiKook play foosball together too. They had so much fun!

Ending Day 3 off with their Diary writings again about their day! Yoongi did his first and gave his day 5 out of 5 stars 🥺 he said he wants to live there he liked it so much! Jin joins him and does his next. Jin talks about how it felt like Harry Potter while he was there. Lol Hobi tells him his handwriting is weird! Rude! Hobi talks about it didn't rain and that Finland gets more charming the longer you stay. Namkook go next and Joon talks about how he looked like a unicorn in his photos because of his hair. Lmao jimin joins JK and they are both working so diligently on their entries. Lmao and Tae just wants attention. He ends up rolling around on top of JK and then knocking into Jimin, and when that goes ignored loudly fake snoring until Jimin looks behind him to see wtf is happening and starts giggling. Lmao Jiminie also gave his day 5 stars! He said he had a lot of fun in the evening with his members and the good music and was very happy. (Tae oohhing in the back lol!) JK talked about how well it went filming for the teaser for GCF and how it made him happy. (Tae heckling him in the background lol). Tae said his favorite part of the day was dinner. Jikook had left but came back to read over what Tae wrote and they drew ALL over it. Lmao poor Tae! When he showed up and caught them, Jimin pushed JK under the bus with a "sheesh, Jungkook! That's That's childish!" Lmaooo why are they like this!!They did their sauna video journals too! Yoongi said it felt like a real trip, which made him happy. Jhopes big smile talking about how he hung out with Jinin and how much Jimin loved it too. 🥺🥺 Jikook watching Tae so fondly play with the gnome doll. Lol JK petting Tae's head was PRECIOUS. And then Jimin got behind Tae and moved his arms around the same way he was doing to the doll before, making Tae the doll. Please it's always so cute and so silly!

Day 4 starts and its the day of their free time adventures in the teams they picked at the beginning!! Namkook go to Kaivopulsto Park and watch the sunrise. They take so many photos of each other too. JK with his big DLSR and Namjoon with his little film camera! Lol they spot a crow on their walk and Namjoon keeps crowing back at it. Lmao they get coffee and treats together at a local shop. "It's nice not having anything to do" they were really just enjoying their time hanging out together being peaceful 🥺🥺🥺 after their peaceful morning they go to a souvenir shop and look like they have such a good time looking at everything.

JiJinHope head out as well and hit up a market first it looks like. Please, Jiminie is the maknae in this trio too. Jin bought ice cream and gave the first bites of his cone to Jimin and Hobi. Hobi bought sweet bread and gave the first bite of it to Jimin, and then ends up just giving it to him when he said it was better than he thought. Their baby 🥺🥺 They go out shopping together and Jin tells them to "buy whatever they want, hyung will get it" even though their budget from the production team was the smallest from the games and Hobi didn't even bring his wallet. Jin was treating them 🥺 Hobi was so cute, holding up his bag "Jin hyung bought me this!" New store and Jimin finds his iconic white hat! They praise him SO MUCH for the hate is amazing. They give out what's left of their euros to a street performer they see too.

TaeGi, the hand holding duo, holding hands while traveling to their destinations for a landmark tour. 🥺 Yoongi sharing little facts about the church they visited. Yoongi praying for their next album to be a success. 🥺 a landmark library too! The way they took so many pictures in both spots too. They were so chill and so cute. They also go to a furniture store. Tae talking about how it reminds him of artists he likes, Yoongi enjoying the lights. Jijinhope meet up with them there. Yoongi and Tae immediately petting Jimins new hat and complimenting him. Lol

"Our free time in Finland is now over" aww seriously though, their free time together was all so touching. All of it. 🥺 now we are exchanging snowglobes! To the person whose name they drew at the beginning on Day 1! Jk gifting his first. So cruel, acting like he was going to gift it to Jimin, but changing last minute to Tae. Lmao it's giving me flashbacks to run where they all teased Jimin with presents the same way 😂 Everyone saying Tae was so lucky to get his since he made it so well. Lol JKs letter to Tae lmao "ayo! Who's the bear?! V!" Lmao his giggles! "The closer you are the shorter the letters." Lmfao JK cracks me up 🤣 Tae gifted gifted RM and wrote in his letter that Namjoon was the work of art himself. Cuteee. RM gifted to Jin, and wrote in his letter that he hopes the snowglobe gives him good energy. Jin gifted to Jimin and wrote the SWEETEST letter. "Shine like the moon wherever you go, Jimin." And he said he tried to grab the prettiest materials because he knows Jimin likes collecting pretty things. And Jimin so cutely petting Jins hair in thanks 🥺 Jimin gifted to Suga. He said Borahae in his letter! Suga gifted to JK and included Holly and a rabbit in there to represent them together. And in his letter says he hopes Holly can help him find peace of mind too and invited him over to see Holly for real basically too. 🥺🥺🥺 Hobi got himself! Lmao and wrote himself a letter about loving winter. Lmao i love him.

They wrap up the DVD with footage of their last meal in Finland, yet eating Korean food. Lol they kept giving it such high praise though. Said if it was made by a foreigner they are really talented and it tastes like home!

Finally Diary entries at the end of Day 4 before they head back home. Jihope start us off doing theirs together after Jhope tackles Jimin onto the bed. Lol Jimin gives his day another 5 out of 5 stars for his day out with 2seok! He talked about shopping and all the cute small shops. Hobi also gave his day 5 stars and he talked about buying cute dolls to get ready to celebrate Christmas and how Jin bought him gifts. Yoonjin went next. Yoongi gave his day 5 stars too! He talked about how amazing the library was he went to go see. Jin said he was sad the golden statue street performer didn't dance but otherwise had a good day. Lmao Taekook went next to write theirs. Tae gave his day 5 stars, and talked about how much he loves interior design and visiting the art galleries. Namjoon joins JK to finish theirs. RM showing us his photo of him and Kookie where he drew cat whiskers on their selca and said it was the "cutest ever" 🥺 he also gave his day 5 stars. Jungkook also gave his day 5 stars and drew whiskers on his namkook selca too. He also wrote that his day was "perfect" 3 times over! He had such a good day with his hyung please 🥺 He said for ARMY visiting Finland, they should pack "money, camera, medicines, gloves, friends, lovers and family." Im so glad that they had such an incredible time with each other on their last day!!

I love this package. There is just so much in it and they all seemed to have a wonderful time, which is truly just all I love seeing!! Thanks for letting me share all my thoughts with you! 🥰

[feelingofcontent]

DNP Rewatch: Viewers Pick My Outfits!

Date video was published: 10/01/2017 (X)

DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 359

The first of these! I can’t believe I’m at this video finally (although I also can’t believe this video came out 4+ years ago, so...) Phil had asked for clothes suggestions just about 10 days before this was posted.

0:03 - Dan’s dramatic gasp in the background is great

0:13 - absolutely love that Phil will try anything on his channel at least once. He definitely doesn’t feel the need to make “serious” content like Dan does

0:17 - Phil not being able to hold it together with Dan there just reminds me of this clip 🥺 also, Dan seems to just be sitting on the floor for this intro

0:44 - here it’s “pajamas” (probably one of Phil’s shirts actually, as we’ll see in the reflection later); by the next of these videos it’s just “pants”

0:49 - do they just walk through the halls of their building from the living flat down to the filming flat in pajamas sometimes? lol. or sometimes it seems they keep some clothes down there, for gaming video filming and such

0:52 - “here in spirit and sarcastic comments” perfect 😂

1:10 - god Phil’s face every time he looks at Dan during this intro 😭

1:40 - he’s already so nervous about this...but then less than a year later!

1:50 - this room setup works pretty well for this video

1:52 - Dan with the immediate “woooo!”

2:25 - Phil went so northern with “I don’t wear hats”

2:29 - “reveal yourself” ...Dan

2:36 - Dan is 1000% encouraging in this video, while still gently teasing. I love it

3:05 - I can’t with Phil's catwalk attempt 😂

3:18 - Phil spends very little of this video actually looking at the camera

3:34 - Phil with the tattoo talk even all the way back here!

3:41 - the way they just bounce off each other to develop ideas...more and more I think this is how they produce even most of their individual tweets

3:44 - I think Phil looks cute in a baseball cap. He has all the nervous body language in this though

3:49 - I could 100% see Dan wearing that jacket

4:00 - why Phil?! also the “yes, yes...yeah! NOOOOO” 😂 Phil really can’t take it seriously

4:09 - the banter in this video is such a mess in a fantastic way

4:18 - Phil is expecting something great here from Safiya...welp

4:31 - again with the “yes, Phil!”

4:46 - help 😭

4:49 - “I don’t want to come out!” Dan’s gotta be holding back from the obvious joke here

4:53 - Dan smiling in the reflection and again with the “yes...YES” and then the “👏 twirl 👏 twirl 👏 twirl”

5:08 - and the hyena laugh

5:31 - “this might be the best one yet” oh Phil...he has such high hopes for something good

5:33 - Dan whispering directly to the camera is great

5:37 - I remember not believing they left this bit in when this video first came out. also, I love that Dan is standing up on the coffee table(?) with the camera there to get the angle right

5:50 - I can’t deal with Dan’s commentary. Phil looks very uncomfortable in this one. His arms though...christ 👀

6:03 - again focusing entirely on banting with Dan and not at all at the camera

6:25 - Phil looks terrified and I remember people freaking the fuck out about this ring bit when it came out

6:44 - every one of Phil’s walks is really something 😂

6:48 - not entirely sure what Dan’s implying there

7:02 - panicking when this happens just makes it worse

7:19 - that is definitely a distinction I have with some of my clothes too

7:32 - I wonder if Dan pre-decided on the order of these outfits. I’m guessing yes

7:47 - Dan with the “holy shit” at this one a Phil just laughing as soon as he can see himself clearly in the mirror

7:55 - yep with the very careful hand positioning...and the zoom-in in editing on his own ass, lol

8:16 - “it’s all going to be okay” from Dan there...how did Phil get into them like that

8:28 - Phil looks so pleased at Dan’s somewhat sincere compliment here...and Dan just wants Phil to take one thing seriously and stop making bad camouflage jokes 😂

8:33 - *butt wiggle*

8:53 - “please just do one normal one” Dan is trying so hard hahaha

8:58 - dying that Dan just...bought Phil underwear and gave it to him on camera

9:11 - Phil is enjoying that tweet

9:21 - the start of the cheese costume! it appeared in several upcoming videos/gaming videos/live shows

9:34 - Dan laughing so hard he made the camera shake...I am also always laughing at this, especially the choice to not wear jeans with it, but to put back on his socks & shoes

9:43 - “this is my lowest point on YouTube” 😂😂

9:55 - this is a lot of skin for Phil on YouTube. at least since uni-Phil. quite the pose...why does he somehow seem more confident in this than some of the other outfits

10:02 - and the blurred ass...this video was a definite ramp-up to what videos in 2018 were like

10:28 - I love that after the most embarrassing one, Dan chose to give Phil the outfit he probably knew he would like the most and look great in 🥺

10:32 - he got out of the cheese outfit as fast as possible

10:42 - Phil does look good in this one...and he seems quite confident in it

10:52 - loud about the BTS boys!

10:54 - love that Dan wants half of that outfit for himself

11:23 - Phil would immediately think about how the clothes are going to injure him

11:32 - Dan doesn’t want to say anything too bad about it, but he’s not really succeeding

11:49 - is this Phil’s interpretation of “cyber goth” 

11:59 - Phil’s still so optimistic...

12:14 - Dan’s “achieve your destiny” hand gesture in the reflection is great

12:29 - that looks VERY uncomfortable

12:41 - Dan with his “phil trash #1″ phil facts here, lol

13:16 - sarcastic Dan here and Phil knows exactly where he’s going and is just laughing

13:30 - “take it off...take it off!” okay we know what you want Dan... 😳

13:49 - so long before he would do it again

13:51 - “glamorous assistant” 

I mean, I love everything about this video and this concept. Could Dan be anymore supportive of every single thing Phil puts on?! He also called the video “premium content.” I’m so excited for the upcoming “Viewers Pick My Birthday Presents” one.

DNP were having a busy start to the autumn; they were briefly in Spain for the YouTube Creator Summit, where they hung out with Anthony again and went to a roller disco (1, 2, 3, 4). Plus, they must have been deep into tour scheduling/planning at this point, though they wouldn’t announce that for another month.

[natigail]

lmaoo this thread is HILARIOUS!! twitter(.)com/btsallure/status/1265535347225739265?s=21 ❤️❤️ and also this edit of sweet night is sooo cute and sweet! 🥺 twitter(.)com/pjmhobi/status/1264681887341187072?s=21 also what do you think of augst d-2? what are your fave tracks and what did you think of the mv? 😄

Anon, please know that I love this ask so much. The twitter thread is indeed hilarious and I was actually laughing the whole way through. I can’t with these people - one of the replies from other people also showed more instances of people not knowing they were one of the same and trashing the group while praising the individuals. I will say that I was slightly confused about the multiple names when I started listening to them, but come on - a quick google would be able to fix it.

The Disney video edit to Sweet Night is gorgeous. I adore that song a lot, I’ve got a vmin fic (10k+ already) that I’m working on in the background and that song of V’s has a particularly important role in it. I’ve gotten distracted by my magical BTS fic series and phanfics but I will come back to work on that fic soon. The edit just reminded me of how much I want to work on that.

I love D-2 a whole lot! (It’s really funny that I’ve never been much of a rap person, but then I started listening to BTS and I just found a whole new appreciation for it?). I like Yoongi’s flow, melodies and lyrics so much. He’s always had this bite to his works, and it’s so clear that he had something to say when he raps.

The first song that stood out to me was People when I did my first blind listen through (not looking at lyrics). Even if I couldn’t really understand most of it, I just really liked it almost from the first few notes. Is that a xylophone in the beginning? Maybe? And after I listened to the lyrics on the second listen, I was just even more hooked. I try not to let my mind get too existential, but I can’t help but wonder about it sometimes. Change is at the heart of this song, as many of my other favourites, and I love that. I often need the reassurance that it’s okay to change and we all go through it.

Another one that I like a lot is Strange - though it hardly comes as a surprise when Namjoon is involved as well. But more than anything the lyrics of this one just come to my house and rip the blanket out from under me. I know Yoongi said that he’s just more posing a question that trying to answer it, but the phrasing in this and the lyrics make it pretty evident how the two boys feel about the darker aspects of society. I like the Korean title of this number even more than the English one: 이상하지 않은가, literally Isn’t It Strange? More like posing a question, and it feels like the two of them just have a conversation philosophising about why the world is like this.

I’ve also got a huge soft spot for Moonlight - in part because it’s the opening track and the little intro bit of Yoongi just casually opening up when he’d know everyone was freaking out to hear his second mixtape. I love that. The messages in this song was just something that really hit a chord with me. At the core, how he reflects that we all change and grow (it’s inevitable), but we can still find comfort in some of the things around us staying the same. The doubt and insecurity if you’re doing what you should with your life is also very prevalent to me right now. Posing the question of what you’d do if you were asked if wanting to go back in your life and change something? Yeah, felt that.

Lastly, I really like 28, even as I again find that I like the Korean title more. 점점 어른이 되나봐 - which the official literally translation states is I Must Be Growing Up, but that first word means “gradually” or “bit by bit”. The feeling of growing up without really realising it, and suddenly you’re an adult, even if you don’t feel like one. It’s very relevant to my life right now, maybe because Yoongi and I are somewhat similar ages (1.5 year apart). I feel like most people in their mid to late twenties are hit with that feeling of being a “proper” adult now but not really knowing what that means to them. You learn more and more about the world as you grow up, and you see that it’s not always a very pretty place - even so I’d choose knowledge over ignorance.

(I could probably write a paragraph for every single one of the songs but these four jumped out as initial favourites to me)

Lastly, the Daechiwa music video! It’s just so fun. I love the contrast between the old king Agust D and the young, modern Agust D. I love all the little references, such as the Bang PD drawing. How modern Yoongi has six other guys with him, always representing the members even when they do solo projects - I also saw speculations that the girl that “hands” him the key is supposed to represent ARMY. The costumes and the beat and everything is just incredible and I keep discovering new details whenever I watch it again. I adored Seokjin and Jeongguk’s cameo, they were so damn fun. The scar is a really cool detail and Yoongi’s expressions all throughout the mv - but in particularly when he’s wrapping and curling up his lip - just so freaking cool. I love the influence of the traditional Korean marching music and how that was reflected in the music video.

Anon, you made me ramble way too much! And now I’m really curious what are your favourite tracks of D-2? Thank you for sending this ask, I had a lot of fun answering, even if I might have been using it to procrastinate something I needed to do as well. Better get on it. Thank you for the links and the questions!