#highly highly recommend the book
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Me watching tv: it’s what murderbot would have wanted
#my thoughts#murderbot#tmbd#the murderbot diaries#Martha wells#rewatching the queens gambit#good show based on an excellent novel#highly highly recommend the book#one of my favorites#beautifully written
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I love this book to death, so here's some things I noticed <3
#hyde being short is quite possibly my favourite thing ever#this isnt me jabbing at the takes that stray from the book#just btw XD#i think thats a big reason why i love it so much is that theres a WEALTH of inspiration that can be taken from the jekyll and hyde trope#theres so much out there i love#that being said#ive been buzzing about jekyll n Hyde recently because of this game that blindsided me with a jekyll n hyde trope#its always fun seeing it out in the wild#as seldom as that is LMAO#if anyones curious though its called vampire therapist and its a character named dr drayne#very cute and very fun game 💕💕#jekyll and hyde#the strange case of dr jekyll and mr hyde#dr jekyll#mr Hyde#also talking about blindsided by gothic lit blorbos#saw an animated Jekyll and hyde movie at the DOLLARSTORE for 5 smackaroos#easiest 5bucks i ever spent#literally the funniest shiy ive ever seen highly recommend watching it pals#its also on youtube for free and its in that so bad its good category for me
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Not Chalice of the Gods continuing the trend of Percy having no clue how his own sword works, six years and two wars into having owned it.
Iconic.
#percy jackson#pjo#cotg#cotg spoliers#percy jackon and the olympians#Hoo#chalice of the gods#percy and annabeth#percy and grover#grover underwood#grover pjo#House of Hades#this book seriously was a blast#highly recommend#heores of olympus
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"The scars formed a mould waiting for my fingers"
#Finished reading Crash and watched the film finally and WOW#The book def adds to the experience of the film I highly recommend to read it. Perfect for freaks like me#Crash 1996#Crash#david cronenberg#Cronenberg#James Ballard#Crash Vaughan#Vaughan#fan art#art#sketch#character art#Scars#Body horror
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"... What I thought was that if you-- maybe just once a year-- if we could come here at the same time, just for an hour or something, then we could pretend we were close again-- because we would be close, if you sat here and I sat just here in my world..." "Yes," he said, "as long as I live, I'll come back. Wherever I am in the world, I'll come back here--" "On Midsummer Day," she said. "At midday. As long as I live. As long as I live..."
(from Philip Pullman's The Amber Spyglass)
#good omens#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#crowley#aziracrow#his dark materials#both the books and the tv series are GORGEOUS#I highly recommend if you've never given them a chance#HDM
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That's all that's left. Fifty-seven pages of research, two bottles of morphine and one ticket back to the Capital. The train departs at dusk.
An illustration for a Patho AU inspired by Bulgakov I'll probably never write properly but it's been worming in my brain for over two years now.
#pathologic#pathologic 2#daniil dankovsky#pathologic bachelor#patho bulgakov AU#this piece has been in my WIPs for at least a year too#finally finished it properly#I'll keep shoving A Young Doctor's Notebook and Morphine into Patho fans' faces#there are film adaptaions too#I enjoyed both but the british TV series is more easily digestable#the russian film is a heavier watch#but the book is the best#it's short too#highly recommend it
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Alright, I’ll fold. Can some one recommend some really good billford fics? I’m new here and I need to see this old man yoai with my own eyes. Also any other really good gravity falls fics could be sick too. Please and thank you!!
#bill cipher#stanford pines#billford#bitter exes you say…show them to me…#just send your favorites#preferably from ao3 but I’m willing to branch if it’s highly recommended#gravity falls#the book of bill#book of bill
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Holy Feast and Holy Fast, Caroline Walker Bynum
#quotes#quote#Caroline Walker Bynum#id in alt text#literally just started this book tonight but I’m really enjoying it#& I got a cheap used copy online so I highly recommend if you have any interest!! pick up a copy & we can chat about it!!!
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I've been scanning the Yami no Purple Eye art book and it got me thinking about why I still feel so strongly about Shinohara Chie's horror-tinged works in particular. They don't have the sweeping settings, period detail or political intrigue of her historical titles, but they're still the works of hers I revisit most often.
I love the way Shinohara captures the physical and psychological horror of being a teenage girl. How truly overwhelming it can be to come into a new physical state and be hit by heightened strengths and fears. All while grappling with how to reconcile this new, hungry state with the "good girl" you were before the change. It's the way she combines this age-old puberty parable with an escalated 80s bent on 40s Hollywood female monstrosity that never fails to linger in my mind.
Let me unpack my rambling thoughts on this a bit and yeah they are pretty rambly I'm sorry I've got that neurological thing going on and it makes being articulate harder than it has ever been before. Forgive me!
Spoilers, bloody images and rambling re: Yami no Purple Eye, Ao no Fuuin, Umi no Yami Tsuki no Kage and Mizu ni Sumu Hana below.
The heroines of Shinohara's longer horror works are all seemingly average girls who are awakened to something horrific within them as teenagers (be it Rinko as panther, Ruka to psychic abilities, or Souko as an oni). Suddenly they're overcome not just by abilities but feelings, appetites, desires. They go from being good, average girls to young women battling forces within them stronger than anything known to science. There's always a boy there to support them through this, but they feel otherwise isolated or dangerous, unable to seek support from anyone else.
Yami no Purple Eye is frequently compared to the 1942 film Cat People and understandably so - in both you have a beautiful young woman descendended from "cat people" whose beastial side can take over when base urges overcome their normally sweet demeanor (though this film is absolutely not the first example of a 'cat person' in speculative fiction). The major difference, I would posit (aside from the more explicitly sexual nature of Cat People's change), is that Irena is an adult and while she also struggles with her identity and powers this battle is not new to her, she is hopeful for a way out but also somewhat resigned to the way things are.
Rinko from Yami no Purple Eye is new to being a panther, she is fearful of her secret getting out but also fearful of herself, of her purple eyes and her "unnatural" urges. While so much of Cat People is a relatively subtle look at female sexuality as a monstrosity in itself, Yami no Purple Eye shows a transformation that at puberty can be harnessed as a form of protection but also remains linked to the animal kingdom and not "enlightened" modern human society.
While Rinko's incredible strength saves her from all sorts of precarious situations, it feels new and out of her control. It isolates her from normal humans and it paints a target on her her back for Kaoruko, the primary antagonist of the series. I think what makes these pubescent power awakenings so alarming for all Shinohara's horror heroines is this lack of control. They didn't willingly trigger their transformation, they don't understand it properly, and they cannot control it. Ultimately each of them goes through a period of feeling incredible isolation from human society, which is common in a lot of speculative texts where the lead finds themselves estranged from society at large.
In Umi no Yami, Tsuki no Kage Ruka has the double-whammy of losing her normal life and her twin sister, Rumi, who has become deranged while coming into her own psychic powers. Although Ruka has the support of love-interest Katsuyuki, it is this love rivalry which put a wedge between her and her sister in the first place. At times, Ruka feels lost with all the destruction triggered by the sisters' transformation, held by Katsuyuki but with a 1000 yard stare in her eyes. Both Ruka and Rumi know deep down that only they can defeat one another, but how do you defeat your identical twin? How do you fight what is essentially your shadow self and your base instincts run riot?
It requires an understanding of the transformation, an acceptance of the change that has taken place, and a peace with what must come next - all of which takes Ruka the better part of 18 volumes to achieve. Mizu ni Sumu Hana takes a shorter route on a similar theme with the two Rikkas and the seeds, giving us another set of two near identical yet drastically different girls fighting for survival.
And being a teenage girl in these stories is very much focused on trying to survive. Another consistency across all these series that underscores the isolation of the heroines is the loss of those around them. Family members and friends are murdered or manipulated indiscriminately. Even if Shinohara's heroines try to seek support from someone other than their love interest, it is very quickly put to a stop by an opposing force. For a young woman in these worlds, struggling to understand her new body and changed mind, there is no option for support outside a male romantic interest.
That in itself is horrifying (though admittedly not as well-examined within text as I'd like, it certainly does feel like a comment) but it becomes a hell of a lot worse if your love interest's goals are at odds with your own. We see this with Souko in Ao no Fuuin who is revealed to be an oni that must survive by consuming humans. Her (false) memories are human and she has only recently learned of her oni nature so understandably she doesn't want to be a predator, yet she must eat people to survive. Akira, her love interest, rather than being a dutiful normal boy like Shin'ya in Yami no Purple Eye, is from an opposing family tasked with destroying her.
Eventually Akira's affection for Souko outweighs his duty to eliminate her and the two work together to try and figure out a way for her to become human and thus no longer require defeating. But initially in Ao no Fuuin, Souko is entirely alone with her growing hunger and power, unable to confide in anyone and unsupported by a romantic interest which proves just as isolating as it sounds. Like Rinko, Souko has gaps in her memory, a sensation that she's done something unnatural but a desperate need to be wrong about it, to be proven human despite all evidence to the contrary. As both heroines have entered their teenage years they have lost all they knew of stability, family and normalcy to have it be replaced by the uncanny, unnatural and unacceptable.
To have the body and mind become unreliable in your teenage years, to feel overwhelmed by forces you didn't know were within you, to feel like you're the only one experiencing such horrors... I mean it's all a big puberty metaphor isn't it? And yeah, to a degree these stories are simply turning the horror dial up to eleven on a cross-cultural feeling of coming into the power and bodily changes of adulthood before your mind can catch up with them (though in the case of Shinohara's stories every lead is shown to be attracted to the opposite sex and not explored as being anything other than cis, so there's definitely a lot left unexplored regarding pubscent queerness in her worlds).
All of Shinohara's long-form horror heroines seem to go through a period of grasping back for the safety and "normalness" of their childhood selves, of who they were before their body and mind betrayed them. Souko repeats to herself countless times that she is human not necessarily because she knows it to be true, but because she wants it to be true. She longs for who she believes she once was and we see similar grief for Rinko and Ruka, now awakened to their new lives as teenage monsters, as they reflect back on the comforting dullness of the recent past with a newfound appreciation and longing.
Ultimately, however, Souko was never a normal teenage girl. Rinko's power was dormant but she was always of panther blood. Rikka was always going to be used as a pawn between black and white dragons. Only Ruka, whose power was awakened after surviving a near-fatal bacterial infection, ever had an entirely normal human childhood and even then she must accept that what she and her sister had in their innocence can never be rediscovered. For some of these heroines there was never a "normal" to go back to and even for those that did have a glimpse at average life, it is ultimately gone from their grasp regardless. Time marches ever onward and for these young women there is no ability to wind back the clock, they must continue forward like all of us, even if their awakening to adulthood is more violent and bloody than most.
While everything I've touched on so far seems absolutely godawful, I think it's important to tie this all together with a bow of hope. Shinohara Chie's long-form horror and suspense stories put all their leads through the wringer, but they are never without hope. There is some degree of happiness out there for all her heroines, victims of circumstance and blood. However, it is not the happiness they had anticipated for themselves as adults and I think that is key to the whole exercise. Shinohara's heroines can at times be passive, clinging desperately to the idea that they can reverse what cannot be reversed. But in the end they must accept and embrace their new bodily powers. Just as we all must accept adulthood even when it doesn't adhere to our childhood hopes and dreams.
Rinko goes through absolute hell to try to get her happy ending and ultimately she doesn't get it, but her daughter Mai does manage to carve out a sense of happiness just by being with the man she loves. Souko can shed her obligation to the Kimon and be with Akira because her previous incarnation's daughter willingly takes on the role of heir for her. Ruka can live on but to do so must kill a willing Rumi and accept that what happened to them will ultimately be forgotten by the greater consciousness. Both Rikkas are revived and can choose their ultimate lifespan as the lost lotus flowers blossom once more.
None of these are your traditional happy ending, but what links them together is a sense of sacrifice. Part of the journey into adulthood, into surviving the horror of having a body as a teenage girl, is accepting the flawed state of adulthood. It comes at considerable sacrifice and it isn't necessarily what you dreamed it would be, but it is yours and you got where you are as an adult through the blood, sweat and tears of your younger self. There's a beauty to that and to Shinohara's flawed heroines and their often patchy narratives. Having a body can be horrific, it can be overwhelming, and it is inherently isolating... but it is essential to experiencing the beauty we do have in this world.
And idk I just think that's neat.
Shinohara isn't an artist to everyone's tastes and I do think there are strengths to her historical tales that perhaps aren't as present in her more horrific works, but her super powered horror stories manage to capture a type of pubescent alarm that a lot of other authors cannot master. While all these works do feel dated to a degree and present a limited scope of gender and sexuality, there's something I find timeless about revisiting the horror and joy of being a girl both cursed and blessed with the burden of a body.
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Edit 14/10/24: I would like to point out that my use of the term "horror" here relates to consistent thematic elements presented in these series rather than their specific genre labels, roots in other sub-genres or relation to other foundational texts outside of Shinohara's oeuvre.
Shinohara's speculative work is frequently labeled battle/suspense manga (with some shorter works earning a 'suspense horror' description at their most intense) and I am in no way disagreeing with these labels or trying to relabel the above titles as strictly horror. Nor does this post seek to break down the full context of these titles as they fit into the development of 80s/90s/00s shoujo.
This post exclusively reflects my personal thoughts on the bodily perils faced by Shinohara's super-powered heroines in the aforementioned texts through a horror lens (which in turn reflects my area of focus back when I studied film).
Everyone will have their own intrepretations of these texts and these characters and that's what makes hearing people's opinions so interesting - always open to hearing yours if you stumble onto this. ^^
#personal#ramblings#shinohara chie#chie shinohara#blood tw#random manga i recommend#shoujo manga#shoujo#shojo manga#shojo#it's 1am here and i feel like garbage#so i may edit this more when i can think a bit better#but wanted to get it out there lest i just bin it#i highly recommend all of shinohara's art books btw#truly gorgeous artwork
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vampires? Pirates? Vampirates!
*Queer* vampirates!!!
Coming to shores near you in a *month* !!!
Add it on Goodreads!
#vampires#pirates#vtm#iwtv#lgbtqia#i suppose it says a lot about me that i just have all this stuff lying around the house#every trans womans life is made better by the addition of a sword#highly recommend adding a blade to your repitoire#solves a number of problems#but you know what else would solve problems?#getting my book! =P#you might enjoy if you support womans wrongs#also murder to a gratiuitious amont
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tbh my latest biggest theory for why HoO and onwards is such a dramatic drop in quality and consistency is just. Rick stopped making teaching guides.
Like, the Lightning Thief teacher's guide is SUPER in-depth with even stuff like sources about middle grade child psychology and exact specifications of where he's applying that, explaining what different character's goals/motivations are, their dynamics with each other and their environments, etc etc. Even specifying which specific myths certain plot elements are supposed to reference or be about.
That stuff just doesn't exist for later books. There's activity guides and smaller, significantly more simple teacher guides for later books but they don't go into anywhere NEAR the same level of depth. The TLT one is a full lesson plan that breaks down the book at every level and explains what's going on and more or less why Rick did that. The others are all basically just glossaries of terminology and some simple question guides.
And they didn't even use the TLT teacher's guide for the Disney+ show because they clearly aren't adhering to any of what's discussed in that breakdown of the book.
By creating a teaching guide alongside writing the actual book, that's forcing you to document what you're doing, why, your sources, and information about your characters and the story they're in. It's like an even more in-depth version of a series bible. But that's lacking for later books (and etc) and it shows because that level of thought and depth and attention just isn't there anymore.
#pjo#riordanverse#rick riordan#rr crit#< i suppose#imo one of the most damning parts of the drop of quality in the later books is you can tell exactly what parts of what books#Rick had planned in advance and which are just filler to get from point a to point b#because characters will jump in and out of consistent behaviors - particularly in HoO - and those lapses where they act weird#are almost always super disconnected from the rest of the plot or storyline or whatever arc that character is on#or are just so clearly sped through because they aren't important#Leo is a great character imo to look at to figure out if it's a filler scene or not lmao#if he's clearly masking being somber by putting on a silly act but dropping it quickly or otherwise largely acting serious/somber#then it's probably a more considered scene and actually paying attention to his overall character arc#or just remembering how the characters are supposed to act (in Leo's case - quiet/thoughtful/somber but masking it with humor/etc)#if he's 100% silly goofy depression arc nowhere in sight then its probably mostly a filler scene or at least his part in it is filler#anyways i highly recommend reading the tlt teaching guide its really interesting actually
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my final piece for @turnabout-cinema! had an absolute blast working on this one :]
#wocky kitaki#turnabout corner#ace attorney#apollo justice ace attorney#aa4#left over sales are available till dec 15th if you missed out on the initial run!#i think physical books are sold out but still highly recommend the digital zine + merch everything is so high quality#also this was the first aa zine i was able to apply and im so glad i did such a great project ;_;#my art#fan art#undescribed#zine#2022
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losing my mind over this, actually.
#this book is so so good so far#it's Less by Andrew Sean Greer#if you wanna check it out#im only halfway through#but i highly recommend#bi mlm#mlm blog#gay mlm#mlm love#mlm post#mlm thoughts#trans mlm#mlm poetry#mlm books#queer poetry#queer books#nblm account#nblm textpost#trans nblm#bi nblm#nblm post#nblm yearning#nblm#mlm#t4t#t4t nblm#t4t mlm#ftm mlm#mlnb#dantes talking again
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Dealing with Dragons: Cimorene sketch ^_^
Been re-listening to Dealing with Dragons recently (anyone who knows me knows I will not shut up about how formative this series was for me re: many things but mostly dragons) and so I got the urge to draw Cimorene again (I sketched her like a year or so ago, but can't find it, so I thought a redesign with my new style was perfect!)
Also, my fav book reviewer (I have one of those now?? What??) Just covered the first book of the series, so if you want to check out a great reviewer AND my favorite book of all time, here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMaKkwHQQKM
Not me trying to speak into existence an Enchanted Forest Chronicles graphic novel series that I get to adapt, whatttt noooo... ^_-
#enchanted forest chronicles#dealing with dragons#Cimorene#books#nostaltic books#fantasy#cool Princess#I also love her other princess friend#Morwen is also great#also so many cats#this is also where I got my CATS ARE BASICALLY DRAGONS thing#Kazul my love#what a fantastic series tho#highly recommend the audio book#if you like high fantasy with a subversion of tropes and with a fairy tale story structure#yes I know the book doesn't say she has freckles but it's my design so of course she has#this is also where I got my love of long braids
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you arent too stupid to get back into reading. i dont know i feel like i see this sort of weird self depreciating sentiment a lot thats like 'oh social media ruined my attention span too badly for me to read books anymore' or 'i cant read anything other than fanfiction' and i promise thats not true. yes it can be hard to get back into it if you havent read anything in a while but it not impossible and you *can* work your way back up to it if its something you want to do. just pick up something pick up anything and chip away at it. if you cant finish it its fine to put it down and pick up something else. but just try at least give it an honest effort. like not to sound an ad for a public library but its not impossible for you to start reading
edit: t.erfs are not welcome on my blog. try reading something other than uselessly reactionary 2nd wave theory from the 70s?
#also if you havent tried audiobooks i highly recommend giving them a try#sometimes thats the only way i can force my brain to absorb information. and thats ok! its the same book!
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Seraph
Benjamin Woodside from the book Hell Followed With Us
#my art#hell followed with us#benji woodside#digital art#fanart#cw: body horror#highly recommend this book!!
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