#hey rube

[hood-ex]

Still pissed that TT missed the perfect—and I do mean PERFECT—opportunity to use, "Hey, Rube!" in the flashback scene where John Grayson started fighting Tony Zucco. Look at these instances where Dick used or mentioned the term "rube." Raaah!! It would've been such an amazing callback!! Such a good way to draw a connection between Dick and John, and the circus culture they lived in!!

Instead we just got John and Mary trying to handle the situation themselves. But if they had just used, "Hey, Rube!" to call for backup, I would've been thrilled. I would've been like, wow, TT has actually done some intensive research into Dick's history—but nooo 😒. Instead, we just got this:

Nightwing (Vol. 4) #82

[nicklloydnow]

“The New Dumb

Something is happening here

But you don't know what it is

Do you, Mister Jones?

- Bob Dylan

No sir, not a chance. Mr. Jones does not even pretend to know what's happening in America Right now, and neither does anyone else.

We have seen weird Times in this country before, but the year 2000 is beginning to look super weird. This time there really is nobody flying the plane....We are living in dangerously weird times now. Smart people just shrug and admit they're dazed and confused. The only ones left with any confidence at all are the New Dumb. It is the beginning of the end of our world as we knew it. Doom is the operative ethic.

The autumn months are never a calm time in America. Back to Work, Back to Football Practice, etc....Autumn is a very Traditional period, a time of strong Rituals and the celebrating of strange annual holidays like Halloween and Satanism and the fateful Harvest Moon, which can have ominous implications for some people.

Autumn is always a time of Fear and Greed and Hoarding for the winter coming on. Debt collectors are active on old people and fleece the weak and helpless. They want to lay in enough cash to weather the known horrors of January and February. There is always a rash of kidnapping and abductions of schoolchildren in the football months. Preteens of both sexes are traditionally seized and grabbed off the streets by gangs of organized perverts who traditionally give them as Christmas gifts to each other to be personal sex slaves and playthings.

Most of these things are obviously Wrong and Evil and Ugly - but at least they are Traditional. They will happen. Your driveway will ice over, your furnace will blow up, and you will be rammed in traffic by an uninsured driver in a stolen car.

But what the hell? That's why we have Insurance, eh? And the Inevitability of these nightmares is what makes them so reassuring. Life will go on, for good or ill. But some things are forever, right? The structure may be a little Crooked, but the foundations are still strong and unshakable.

Ho ho. Think again, buster. Look around you. There is an eerie sense of Panic in the air, a silent Fear and uncertainty that comes with once-reliable faiths and truths and solid Institutions that are no longer safe to believe in....There is a Presidential Election, right on schedule, but somehow there is no President. A new Congress is elected, like always, but somehow there is no real Congress at all - not as we knew it, anyway, and whatever passes for Congress will be as helpless and weak as whoever has to pass for the "New President."

In the world of sports, it is like playing a Super Bowl that goes into 19 scoreless Overtimes and never actually Ends...or four LA Lakers stars being murdered in different cities on the same day. Guaranteed Fear and Loathing. Abandon all hope. Prepare for the Weirdness. Get familiar with Cannibalism.

Good luck,

DOC

- November 20, 2000”

[popsixsquishcicerolipschitz]

HEY RUBE!

[oxideblack]

[taiga-fujimura-official]

look I understand AI art is a more nuanced topic than people give it credit for but like for real who the fuck is paying for other people to make it for them

[pleuvoire]

starting ultraman r/b my attention span is so shot today it’ll be a miracle if i make it through the first ep but omg this premise is so fun

[sanguinewolves]

absolutely hate when ppl say that dean winchester is just some guy bc it forces me to confront the fact that to a majority of ppl he does in fact look like Just Some Guy

[arc-misadventures]

I Don't Want To Take That Class...

Today was now, Jaune's second day at, Beacon Academy for, Beast Masters. And, Jaune's school experience was so far: Not that great.

Well, at least today he could learn what his classes would be. Beacon had a system where on the first day of school students would orient themselves with the school, get settled into their room, but most importantly they would show off their, Spiritual Beasts so the teachers knew what monster they had, and how to best teach them to master their, Spiritual Beasts powers.

Jaune wasn't sure what he would be learn, considering, Salem's powers were so fast, and how certain members of the teaching staff were giving him, and more importantly, they were giving, Salem some very questionable looks. Particularly, Headmaster Ozpin.

Salem had told, Jaune about her rather interesting past with the man. Only the brief rundown of things, but he figured it would be for the best if she explain everything in detail. Less he walked into something he didn't want to be in.

~~~

Jaune: Okay... Where am I...?

: Oh, hi, Jaune!

Jaune: Hmm? Oh hey, Ruby.

Ruby: Here to find out what classes you're in?

Jaune: Yeah. Have you found out what classes you're in?

Ruby: Yep!

Jaune: Can you tell me what classes you have? Maybe we have one in common.

Ruby: Sure! I have classes for, Shadow, and Wind magic. But, since you are omni-elemental we'll probably have the same classes. You're probably have the same classes as everyone.

Jaune: Probably. I'll also be in the flight class since I can... well: Fly. Regeneration though... yeah...

Ruby: C-Can you actually regenerate...?

Jaune: Yes.

Ruby: Are you going to elaborate?

Jaune: Do you really want to know how that works?

Ruby: ...

Ruby: No...

Jaune: Smart lass.

Ruby: Okay, but can you tell me about.. Ooph?!

: There you are, Rubes! I've been looking all over for you!

Jaune was taken aback as an older, far more well endowed blonde woman put, Ruby in a headlock, and started giving her a little noogie.

Ruby: Yang?! Stop it!

Yang: Alright, alright I'll stop. I'll... Oh? Well hello~! You must be, Jaune Arc, the guy with the, Spiritual Deity!

Jaune: Yep, that's me. And, you are...?

Yang: Yang Xiao Long! This little twerps big sister! It's a pleasure to meet you!

Jaune: Pleasure.

Yang held out her hand for a hand shack, and Jaune moved his hand to shake it. But, it stopped when her hand was slapped away from his. Yang, and Ruby turned to look at her hand utterly perplexed. All the while, Jaune turned to left as he scowled at the air.

Jaune: Why did you do that? It was just a handshake!

Yang: Uhhh...?

Jaune: We just met her, what's so untrustworthy about her?

Yang: Who is he talking to?

Ruby: Oh! He's talking to his, Spiritual Beast!

Yang: They can talk to each other?

Ruby: Yeah, they do it all the time!

Yang: That's true? I thought that was just a joke?!

Ruby: It's true! Although, Jaune does look a little crazy since he's talking to 'nothing.'

Yang: Yeah, that does look a little...!?

Jaune: What?! Just because she's wearing a midriff, and showing off her belly does not mean she's a harlot?!

Yang: The fuck did you just call me?!

Jaune: Nothing! I did not call you anything at all! Salem called you a harlot though...

Yang: You wanna go missy?!

Yang pointed in the air, as she challenged a god to a fist fight.

Jaune: She's behind you.

Yang: Eh? OWW?!

Yang turned around, and then reeled back as she felt someone's finger flicked her forehead.

Yang: D-Did she just flick my forehead...?

Jaune: Yeah, sorry about that. Salem is... possessive to say the least. She doesn't like it when other girls get too close to me.

Yang: Sounds like a possessive wife.

Jaune: If you knew why she's so possessive of me... you... you wouldn't blame her... that much.

Yang: Are you going to tell me?

Jaune: Best you don't know. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to learn what my classes will be.

Jaune quickly left to go see what classes he was placed into, leaving the sisters alone.

RY: ...

Yang: Well... He seems like a pretty nice guy... It's a bit weird to have an invisible girlfriend batting everyone away from him though.

Ruby: She's actually his wife!

Yang: Really?

Yang: It's still weird that she does that.

Ruby: Yeah it is weird...

~~~

Jaune: Do you see my name on any of these lists, Salem?

Salem was floating over head the crowd of students, searching for her beloveds name among the. She was phasing through the ones who were to close to the board overhead for those she couldn't see.

Salem: Afraid not my love. I've scoped all of these lists, and I haven't found your name on any of them.

Jaune: That's not good...

Salem: Oh, and why is that?

Jaune: Because of you, Salem, it means that they've no doubt come up with a special class of some sorts exclusively for me... And, since i am one of the rare few to have a, Spiritual Deity as my, Spiritual Beast they'll want to run some tests on us.

Salem: Are you sure of that?

Jaune: It's been over four thousand years since the first person became a, Spiritual Beast Master. And, since there have only been just over two dozen, Spiritual Masters who have formed a bound with a, Spiritual Deity. And, to make matters worse, I am the first person you've ever formed a bound with. They are going to run some tests on us.

Salem: These tests... I will have to show myself before them then... This feels like a trap...

Jaune: But, is it for me, or is it for you?

Salem: That doesn't matter! You are my husband! If they come after one of us, then are coming after the both of us, and if they dare harm so much a single golden lock of hair from your head, I will introduce them all, I will remind, Ozma of what is a, Spiritual Deity's FURY!

Jaune watched as a whirlwind of elemental powers swirled around, Salem. Fire, ice, lighting, earth, shadows, and light rage in a kaleidoscope of raw power hang in the air about her. It was a beautiful sight to behold, his beloved showing off the full range of her powers.

To him that is.

Jaune: Salem, you look beautiful, honey. But, everyone is looking at me like I'm crazy since they can't see the, Oni Queen making a storm of elemental powers in the air, they just see the elemental storm ball.

Salem: Eh...?

Salem looked to her side seeing a crowd of students looking on, some in awe, others in fear.

Salem: Whoops...

The storm slowly faded away as, Salem nervously floated down in front of, Jaune. She bashfully looked away from him as a fierce blush was spreading across her face.

Salem: Sorry...

Jaune: It's okay, Salem. It was a good way to flex on everyone.

Jaune rubbed his hand along, Salem's cheek as she swooned into his hand. This loving moment between couples was swiftly brought to the end, when the were interrupted when someone unexpected appeared.

: That you are, Mr. Arc. Lady, Salem...?

Standing before them was the deputy headmistresses of, Beacon Academy. Who looked rather cross...

Jaune: Hi, Professor Goodwitch! C-Can we help you with anything?

Glynda: Can you.. two come with me. Headmaster Ozpin wishes to have a word with you.

Jaune: About our classes?

Glynda: Yes, since you have made a contract with a, Spiritual Deity we've had to come up a unique set of classes for you to do.

Jaune: I expected as much...

Glynda: Will you come with me so we may discuss it?

Jaune: Alright then... We'll come...

Salem: Are you sure this is a wise idea, Jaune?

Jaune: Nope, but what else can we do?

Salem: Improvise?

Jaune: That'll work...

~~~

"Ding~!"

The elevator doors slowly opened, and Jaune, and Salem were greeted to the sight of a trio of teachers, Jaune didn't want to see.

Before him was, Professor Peach, Dr. Oobaleck, and lastly, Headmaster Ozpin.

Out of the three, Professor Peach was the one, Jaune was the least suspicious about. She was a medical doctor, so she was probably here to see about his regeneration abilities. He could understand her curiosity about that, everyone was curious when it came to his regenerative abilities. However, based upon how she wanted to test these abilities, that's where he started to grow cautious of her.

Dr. Oobaleck put, Salem's nerves on end, and in turn, Jaune's as well. He was a scientist, so of course he was curious about the capabilities of, Salem's powers. But, Jaune had read enough science fiction books, and shows to know that the most dangerous scientist there is, is the one who was trying to test the bounds of science, and no one was there to tell them this one simple thing: "No."

So many terrible events that happened because science gone crazy could have been solved if someone just said, "No, bad scientist, no!"

And, lastly he had, Headmaster Ozpin. Out of the three, Jaune was most cautious of this man. Salem had told him plenty of things about, Ozpin, and the results of his, Spirit Curse. So, unless everyone didn't behave. Things were going to become very bad, very, very quickly.

~~~

Ozpin: Ahh... Hello, Mr. Arc. Do you know why we brought you here today?

Jaune: Considering that I didn't see my name on the list of classes, I assume you asked me here to tell me what my classes are?

Ozpin: You are correct, Mr. Arc. Because of your unique circumstances, being partnered with a, Spiritual Deity, and all. Along with your wide variety of spiritual powers, we had to come up with some unique classes to teach you, Mr. Arc.

Jaune: I expected as much... what classes will you be teaching me?

Ozpin: Well, start with, Professor Peach. Professor?

Peach: Thank you... Hello, Mr. Arc, I am Professor Padma Peach. We won't be having too many classes together. Mostly we'll be having tests.

Jaune: Trying to determine the capabilities of my, Regeneration abilities?

Peach: Why, yes! I am most looking forward to learn how that ability of yours works!

Jaune: That's one of us...

Ozpin: Bart.

Oobaleck: Hello, Mr. Arc! My name is, Doctor Bartholomew Oobaleck! I will be teaching you how to control your basic elemental powers! Earth, fire, water, and air! I have never taught an omni elemental before! My fellow teacher, Peter Port will also be assisting me during your teaching! He was busy monitoring the students so he couldn't be here! But, I can assure you, he is most excited to teach you as well!

Jaune: O-Okay...?

Ozpin: And, lastly, Mr. Arc, I will be teaching you how to use your light, and dark magical powers. We will be dividing these class for three to be spent learning ight, and dark magic, and the rest will be spend on your other elemental powers. Professor Peach will only be available during your other elemental powers. But, that should offer her enough time to study your regeneration capabilities.

Ozpin: We will be sending you a timetable of these, and your various other classes you will be taking. We look forward to teaching you, Mr. Arc!

Jaune took in his words with a grain, no, a heap of salt. Professor's Port, and Peach, and Doctor Oobaleck all teaching him in tandem made sense, he was omni elemental after all. But, having a class all alone with, Ozpin.

Jaune mulled over this news, but as he looked to the side, and came to a simple conclusion.

Jaune: I don't want to take that class, Headmaster... No, I won't be taking that class...

Ozpin: Excuse me?

Jaune: Deputy Headmistress, Glynda Goodwitch already teaches classes on dark, and light magic, I want her to teach me those classes, not you.

Ozpin: What are you talking about, I am the most skilled teacher of those elements the world over. I can assure you, I can help you master those powers.

Jaune: And, I can assure you, Headmaster... We will not be taking any classes with you...

Ozpin raised his mug to his face to take a drink, but paused as he took in his wrods.

Ozpin: 'We?'

(Smash.)

Ozpin: What was...?

Ozpin dipped his drink to far, and his drink spilled out of his mug. But, instead of a splatter of how bean water, a solid chunk of coffee ice fell out, and shattered on top of his desk.

Ozpin: What the?!

Ice. Ice emanated from the floor around, Jaune. The temperature in the room fell rapidly, one could see their air as they breathed. For all, but one that is. Jaune stood before, Ozpin, his body was at ease, calm. He didn't seem to be bothered by the coldness building in the room, or it didn't appear that the cold was affecting him at all.

Jaune: Now you've done it, Headmaster...

Ozpin: Done... Done what?

: Not taking my 'hint!'

Within a fraction of a second, The Oni Queen, Salem appeared before Ozpin. She was floating in the air before him, a calm smile played across her lips as the tempest of the storm loomed over the, Headmaster.

Ozpin: Hint... What hint...?

Salem: You think I flicked your forehead as some sort of 'playful teasing?' Hmm...?

Salem cocked her head to the side, her voice was loud for all to hear. Jaune could tell she without seeing her face that she was giving him a cold, an emotionless toothy smile. And while, Jaune knew she had a beautiful smile, it was a predators smile. She bore fangs that could rip through metal with ease, and when she showed off her fangs, the likely hood she was threatening you was very, very high.

Salem: No, that was a warning... a warning to tell you to keep your hands to yourself...

Ozpin: Keep my hands to myself...?

Salem: Yes. For it has come to my attention that you do not seem to remember why you were cursed with immortality. And, we are all too willing to remind you of why that all happened. But, if you dare touch a single hair on my lovers head. I will show you why my daughter held me back the last time you received divine punishment! Understood, Ozma.

Ozpin's body has slowly begun to freeze to his chair as, Salem lowered the temperature more, and more to the point his, Aura's protective barrier was failing to withstand the extreme cold. With a shaky, and cold breath, he answered her.

Ozpin: O-O-Okay...! I-l-l-leave you two alone!

Salem: Good~! Now then...

Salem soon floated over, and appeared before, Glynda, the pair locked eyes before, Salem gave, Glynda a toothy half smile, before she returned to address, Ozpin.

Salem: Glynda here will be teaching, Jaune how to master his light, and dark magic works. Understood?

Ozpin: Y-Y-Yes...

Salem: Good~! Now, let go, Jaune. I'm done with this worm.

Jaune: Alright then. Goodbye, Ms. Goodwitch, Professor, Peach, Doctor Oobaleck. I look forward to seeing you in class.

With that the pair walked into the elevator, and left. Leaving behind the three freezing, and frozen teachers behind.

Glynda: Ozpin... I do not care for whatever schemes you are planning, but I will take you down before she gets a chance to if you push things too far! Understood?

Ozpin: P-Perfectlly... Miss Goodwitch.

Glynda: Good!

Ozpin: Now then... B-Bart?

Oobalek: Yes?

Ozpin: Can you call, Port up here at once... I-I-I'm frozen, and can't move...?!

Oobaleck: On it!

Well, Jaune now would have his class schedule, and Salem had given, Ozpin's final warning. The school year was finally about to begin for real!

Hopefully things didn't go to hell too quickly...

[a-very-tired-jew]

Absolutely wild to see a Jewish blog on here that has historically called out antisemitic rhetoric in media, such as Disney and AoT, fully embrace that same rhetoric when it comes to Israel and Hamas.

But I also understand.

I won't call anyone out, but if you can spot the similarities in AoT to Nazi rhetoric about Jews, then you can sure as shit spot them in the rhetoric of Hamas and their allies. Willfully ignoring it because "Western Civ is Bad" is an indicator that you have been radicalized by that exact same rhetoric, except this time it's coming from people you like or share interests with.

My Left leaning shalomies, you have got to be careful. You may identify as a Democratic Socialist, a Socialist, or even some form of Communist, but that "West Civ is Bad" rhetoric and talking points you're repeating that you heard from your more radical Comrade comes coupled with thinly disguised antisemitism. They're using your dissatisfaction with the state of things here in the USA and other Western countries to spread Holocaust Inversion/Denial, spread blood libel, ZOG, and other such antisemitic conspiracies.

How do I know?

I'm in my late 30s. In my 20s I was an avowed anti-Zionist. But as time went on more and more of the rhetoric I was being told by other anti-Zionists didn't make sense. It was a lot of Bundist talking points about how the diaspora was always safer while also denying the well documented pogroms that had happened against us.

While also denying what happened to the Bundists in the USSR.

What happened to people like Benjamin Zuskin.

And so many others who argued that we were "safe".

It was the Holocaust Universalization mixed with Denial and Inversion. It was so many things that when you looked at them in a bigger picture they ended up contradicting themselves.

It was the denial that Nazis allied with various regimes in the MENA to blatantly kill Jews for simply existing.

It was the denial that antisemitism was actually not a big problem nor as pervasive as it actually is.

Simply put, after enough time, life experience, reading, and thinking it became very clear to me that I had been fed a line of bologna. They had played on my dissatisfaction with the USA and its past actions.

I legit had the line "Israel only exists as a modern day concentration camp to keep all the Jews in one place and then exterminate them later. Jews need to be dispersed around the world to keep them safe" as justification to be anti-Zionist thrown at me when I was younger.

And it made sense at the time. You're fed so much pro-USA material growing up that eventually you find out the narrative that the USA lies, that the UK lies, that the West lies all the time. So you look for alternatives, but you end up embracing propaganda from even worse sources that are downright authoritarian and trying to deny their own atrocities and bigotry by pointing at others. You honestly swing so far the other way on the pendulum that you embrace and repeat rhetoric without fully understanding the nuance and complexity of it all.

When I hit my 30s I realized I had been taken for a ride. A veritable rube if you will.

And I see this same pattern in a lot of younger anti-Zionist Jews in that same age bracket. It's the same dissatisfaction that is being manipulated into antisemitism under the guise of anti-Zionism. It's the denial that what they're saying is antisemitic because surely they, as Jews, know what that actually is, and even if it is, they can't be antisemitic because they're Jewish. Right? Right???

So I beseech you. When the rest of us are saying "hey, this is actually antisemitic" and you go "Um, actually... As a Jew..." please stop for a moment. Think why some of us would be pointing that out. It's not for Zionism sake or any other political ideology. It's because that hate fueled rhetoric hurts all of us and some of us have been in your exact same shoes.

So if you can see the antisemitism in something like AoT and Disney, then you can surely see it in these slogans, rhetoric, and actions of anti-Zionist activists. And if you don't...well hopefully this will make you stop and think.

[lord-of-rain]

Vol 10, Jaune's ranged option

And it's consequences have been a disaster for his pelvi-

Jaune: Oh, there you are Rubes.

Ruby: Oh... hey Jaune.

Jaune: Okay... I know things aren't the same between us, but you need to see this

*Hands Ruby a white and gold pistol*

Ruby: *Turning it over in her hands* Woah, you made this yourself?

Jaune: Yeah, I kinda... based it off your design.

Ruby, blushing: Really? But making it a pistol would decrease its range and stopping power.

Jaune: Yeah, I had to make a few tweaks, but I mostly got around it with these experimental rounds that replace the tip with micro-rockets.

Ruby, nose bleeding: Oh~

Jaune, 4 hours later: *shirtless, and half dead from exhaustion*

Ruby, fidgeting: A- and that's why Jaune's in my bed... like that.

WBY:...

Weiss: Not explaining this to his team, one, two, three, not it.

Ruby: Not it!

Blake: Not it.

Yang No i- fuck.

[superiorsturgeon]

Blake: So, Ruby, since you’re dating both Jaune and Pyrrha, I have to ask…

Blake: …top or bottom…?

Ruby: Well, you might have guessed from my confident personality and the the fact that I’m a team leader- 😏

Jaune: *suddenly whispers in Ruby’s ear* Hey, Rubes~! 😘

Ruby: *crumples into a shuddering mess* AAAAHHH…! 🫣

Blake: 🤨

Jaune: 😏

Pyrrha: Jaune, don’t tease our girlfriend like that! 😠

Jaune: *immediately* I’m sorry, mommy! I’m a good boy, mommy! 😖

Blake: Wow, not only are you a bottom, you’re a bottom TO a bottom!

Ruby: 😫

[reashot]

Why Do People Keep Saying Jaune Is A Daddy?

Ruby: *grumble* Can you believe the nerves of some people!

Weiss: What's wrong with her?

Blake: She saw a bunch of Milfs trying to get close to Jaune.

Yang: Oh? I thought she got PMS.

Ruby: How could tho-those hussies throw themselves to Jaune like that how shameless, how enviable.... I mean, those bitches be crazy y'all!

Weiss: You know Rubes. I don't get what you see in Jaune anyway?

Blake: Yeah, he's just a typical white cis-het male. Which according to my belief is that they're responsible for everything wrong with the world.

And the only way to remedy it is to reject all heterosexual relation and embrace radical lesbianism.

Yang: Okay... Anyway where's Vomit Boy?

Weiss: He's taking care of Adrian.

*opens door*

See Jaune and Adrian Sleeping together peacefully.

RWBY: .....

Ruby: Girls... Please get Adrian out of here.

Blake: Way ahead of you.

*gently picks Adrian up*

Weiss: So how are we going to do this?

Yang: We will take turns obviously.

Ruby: Good idea. Blake please lock the door.

*click*

Blake: Let me be first.

Yang: Said the radical lesbian.

RW: *giggles*

Blake: Oh go F yourself.

Jaune: *waking up*

Hey girls. What are all four of you doing here... Wait, where's Adrian?

Ruby: *crawl up to him*

Adrian is fine.

*kiss Jaune*

Jaune: Wait, why are you kissing me?

Yang: It's more fun to show you.

*all four starts undressing*

Jaune: Brothers preserve me...

In another universe.

Jess: My Jaune is about to become a baby daddy without his consent sense is tingling!

Baz: That's... Oddly specific?

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Emerald And Jaune are making out on a couch, Emerald straddling Jaune

Jaune: *Pulls away, breathing heavily* Wow you're really Int-

Jaune: *Jumping up* AH! PENNY!

Penny: Salutations!

Emerald: *Picking herself off the floor* Ow- How long were you there for?!?

Penny: Two Minutes.

Jaune: Were- Were you just watching Us?

Penny: Yes!

Emerald: Why?!?!?

Penny: I am interested in learning more about physical intimacy, and figured that you would not mind my observation, given you are in an open, public area.

Jaune: That's ... Fair enough I suppose.

Emerald: In the future, Ask whoever you're watching. Or JUST Don't watch!

Penny: Understood! I apologize for overstepping the boundaries, and will not do so in the future!

Jaune: So ... Is there anything else you wanted?

Penny: Might I join you for a time?

Emerald: What? Like a Threesome?

Penny: If you mean the Three of us engaging in a romantic or sexual act of intimacy together, Yes!

Emerald: *Looks to Jaune*

Jaune: ... *Shrugs* I mean, I don't see why not if you don't.

Emerald: Then I guess you can Penny.

Penny: Sensational!

~Several Hours later~

Ruby: JAUNE! PENNY! EMERALD! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS!

Jaune: *Chugging a 5-Gal Jug of Powerade* Hey Rubes. Me and Emerald accidentally awakened Penny's libido.

Jaune: I suspect I have 6 to 12 seconds before she finds me again or Emerald tags out.

Thieve's Respite Wraps around Jaune's midsection

Jaune: I figured. I would suggest leaving the are for your own innocence. If you don't see me in Six Hours, have emergency fluids ready.

Jaune: *Getting yanked back* AAAH-

[notmaplemable]

Ruby: *Sitting on her front porch by herself*

Yang: Hey Rubes, you're missing your own birthday party.

Ruby: ...

Yang: Everything okay?

Ruby: ...I just realized I'm older than mom was when she died.

Yang: ...

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Jaune: Hey Rubes. Looking good cutie!

Jaune: *kisses her hard*

Ruby: *internally* So hot. Wow. Sex? Sex time?!

Ruby: What was that for?

Jaune: I felt like it.

Jaune: *walks away*

Ruby: Get back here! You made me horny!

Jaune: That’s not my problem.

Ruby: You can’t just walk away like that!

[drdemonprince]

hey hi I'm the homewrecking anon from a month ago. instead of the rube goldberguesque plan to elope with some loser's wife I wandered into a bdsm club and my hyposensitive autism made me a natural at getting the shit beaten out of me and loving it. fast forward I've fallen in with a polycule of clown acrobats who can't go one week without hosting an orgy. A few have read your books. Life's good.

thank fuckin god anon. Many here would do right to follow this now ascended soul's example.