#hes doing a great job manipulating everyone honestly i would fall into the trap too

[mirkwood]

The whole annatar / mirdania thing is so fucking FUNNY like you can CLEARLY see he's manipulating her AND using the galadriel compliment to get her to trust him 😭😭 bro you're insane and I respect the things you're willing to say and do to get this random elf to lose respect for celebrimbor likeeee

[frenchphobic]

long fucking post on why a c!dream is a shitty person and probably should not have a redemption because it is unpog

honestly i just want to refute dream apologists thats why im making this post. i think that dream as a villain is interesting but i think that trying to make him out to be secretly a good guy is just bad ngl. also /roleplay and all

tw for abuse and mentions of suicide

dream as a villain

dream is a villain. he is chaotic evil according to wilbur, deliberately does not stream to appear less sympathetic (and yet), and is set up as an antagonist to tommy who bears the title ‘hero’. dream is not a good person, no matter how you look at it or try to justify his actions.

‘but he wants to unite everyone to be a big family :((’ the ends dont justify the means believe it or not. having a vaguely positive goal does not excuse the actions you’ve done. it also goes hand and hand with saying dream is correct for punishing tommy the way he did because he acted up. if i socked you across the face and then suddenly said ‘sorry there was a roach on ur face’ does that make it okay? probably not i still punched you, enacting an unnecessary amount of violence. thats a very simple analogy i will admit and there are more complex comparisons. another example off the top of my head is say a child just scribbled all over you walls with crayons. would hitting them be a justified answer? if u said hes thats really fucked of u go seek help u loon. violence as a punishment is very toxic, just because it gets the job done does not mean it is okay. at the end of the day, you still committed this act and the harm you caused is real, having a good motive doesnt suddenly make it okay.

‘but tommy causes all of the conflict’ the disk war wasnt even caused by tommy, it was sapnap and then tommy got involved. and the reason why tommy even caused conflict was because of the discs, because he wanted them back. and most of the time there was a level of antagonism from another party, such as schlatt exiling him, dream taking the disks in the first place, dream threatening l’manberg. and if dream wanted to end the conflict so badly, why didnt he just give tommy back his disks? tommy upfront said everything started with the disks, so he wants them back so he could end the conflict. notice how after tommy got his disks back he has been staying out of conflict, apologizing to everyone, and the only bad thing hes done is try to scam people but everyone does that. this would have been the most peaceful option, yet dream chose the path that would further antagonize tommy which then draws everyone else into conflict. why did dream need to have leverage over tommy so badly? why did he want to hold power over tommy so badly? its because of control, and that’s ultimately dreams end goal. sure he wants a big server family, but would said family have a free will?

‘but dream is sad’ the thing is dream is completely at fault for everything that happened to him. he pushed away sapnap (and george ig). he tried to take control over the server and their possessions. literally everything that happened to tommy. literally everything involving ranboo. villains can be sympathetic, i am not arguing against that. but it does not mean that they should be left off the hook. that doesnt mean u should ignore the shit theyve done because ‘oh no theyre sad’ because it doesnt make anything better. dream had this shit coming for him.

now people also skirt around calling dream an abuser. which is fair ig, its a very loaded word. its much easier to say manipulated. that being said, dream can classify as abusive. and no, tommy is not abusive. abuse is about control and a power imbalance. dream has power over tommy, but tommy does not have power over dream, at least not in the way dream does. he’s taking back power to stand up for himself, dream uses power to control.

the reasons i listed for why dream is from the Domestic Abuse Intervention Project so if u want a source on that, there you go.

using coercion or threats: dream often threatened tommy, such as the pit thing and often employed violence on him. while normally this could be attributed to Normal Minecraft Player Go Smack. minecraft mechanics cannot always translate to real world since violence is pretty normal in minecraft however we also need to consider the context of the scene. dream gave an order, tommy refused, dream applies violence, tommy submitted. thats why its a threat, it has tangible effects that can correlate to real life.

using intimidation: dream blew up logsteadshire as a punishment. dream also destroyed tommys items anytime he visited. dream also hit tommy with his axe i believe. he killed mushroom henry, one of tommys pets.

Using Emotional Abuse: dream guiltripped the shit out of tommy for just hiding things and pinning the blame on tommy for just wanting his own private items. he definitely played mind games on tommy, pretending to be his friend. honestly i probably dont even need to go as in depth because it was so obvious.

Using Isolation: putting him in exile in the first place. destroying the bether portal so no one could visit tommy anymore. i really dont think i need to expand upon that.

Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming: dream in tommys stream when he got trapped said that exile wasnt that bad. he does shift the blame onto tommy for logsteadshire being blown up, even though dreams reaction was entirely unjustified for not listening and hiding.

Using Economic Abuse: see this is where i attempt to parallel minecraft mechanics to real life. obviously, there is no monetary system in place, so when i mean economic, i will use valuables such as armor, food, etc in place of currency. the idea behind economic abuse is to limit the victim’s resources so that they are dependent on the abuser and cannot escape. dream only really allowed tommy to have the armor he gave him while not giving access to armor so he does not regain a sense of power, and in the prison stream, dream holds all the potatoes which puts him in a position of power over tommy. this argument is more ambiguous i feel cause the whole minecraft mechanics thing is kinda weird so u don’t necessarily have to take this part in.

i feel like i need to emphasize this very strongly because dream is not a good person. abuse cannot and should not be a response to someone. its an awful mentality to have. i just want to prove the point that dream is not a good person, his reasons absolutely do not justify his actions.

what makes a good redemption

redemption arcs are tricky. when done right they are great. when done poorly, its a slap in the face. rn im going to establish a formula to what makes a good redemption with an example.

the most well known example of a good redemption is zuko from atla. first, its the magnitude of what theyve done and why. zuko did commit some shitty actions, since he was in a position of power in the fire nation but its because he is a child being abused and wanted to regain honor. zukos real awful acts was season 1 and the whole betrayal thing. thats not to say that zukos actions suddenly are okay, he did shitty things. but its something that can be traced to a higher entity or seem less malicious then the other villains. the thing also about the magnitude of actions is that there is a certain point of atrocities that there is no redemption. some people simply cannot be redeemed because the actions they commit are so ingrained in their character or the action itself has serious moral issues that it would just be wrong.

the next is acknowleding what they did was wrong. a genuine reflection on the self and analyzing what they did and why it was not okay. zuko realized what he did to uncle iroh was bad for example. he turned his back on his father, realizing he didnt and shouldnt seek acknowledgment from someone as heinous as him. its pointing out your actions and going ‘hey, this wasnt right i should not have done this’ and not even excusing ur actions. its also going straight for the root of the problem and figuring out to stamp it from the source. just because a character is sad does not mean they are reflecting, sometimes they are attempting to garner pity. it has to be direct and clear acknowledgement of the injustice.

and finally, an important part about redemption arcs is the actual redemption part. its when you make amends. zuko made amends with katara by trying to help her get revenge, he fought against the fire nation and tried to make things more peaceful in his rule. he apologized to iroh. an important part of the amends section is that it does have to be a genuine desire to change and become a better person, not to change a person’s perception of you. the thing is u cant expect a person youve hurt to forgive you. you cant expect people to be sympathetic towards you nor should u attempt to make urself sympathetic. u shouldnt be expecting a pat on the back or an award. redemption is about internal and character change.

why dream should not be redeemed

ive already established the key points to a good redemption (imo) but heres where dream falls short. his actions are extremely heavy so redemption may not even really be possible. abuse is not something you can wave off so it does cross to the point of fucked up. acknowledgement of what he did was wrong? all he said was that he changed, yet never explained why he changed or was too vague. he needed to label specifically what he did and bring it up. attempting to make amends? he’s been doing the exact opposite in fact he continues to manipulate tommy and ranboo. its not a genuine change. he is still repeating the cycle and has given no indication of ceasing. at the moment he does not have any signs of redemption.

and the thing is most of the attention around a dream redemption comes from either justifying his motives (which i do want to emphasize does not make anything suddenly okay) and because he is sad in prison sad face. these are not good reasons. its gonna pain me severely to bring this up but snape from harry potter does have some form of sad character ig yet he very much abused his authority to bully children as old as 11 just because he said ‘aight gonna die’ doesnt suddenly make his general bigotry and abuse suddenly okay there is a threshold. again im so sorry for using harry potter as an example none were coming to mind and i needed a popular one i do not like harry potter please dont say i do i would pass away.

and the last thing to consider is the audience. keep in mind that the audience is composed of minors and while yes there are adults, minors are the main component of the fandom. keep in mind that there are quite a few people who can relate to tommys character because they might be in the same position or have gone through his experiences. tell me what kind of message does it send to that audience that abusers can be redeemed. this is not a narrative u should push to this audience in these situations and the writers are seemingly aware of it. remember how in exile tommy spiraled into a suicidal mentality? consider how fucked of a message it would be if he just committed suicide instead of escaping abuse and attempting to recover from his experiences. tommy did an excellent job in not going that route and having a message of ‘it will not get better’. its the same thing here. victims are not obligated to care for or forgive their abuser, and portraying an abuser as sympathetic might fuck with the message a lot, even change their perception in that ‘oh, maybe my abuser was right, maybe they had a reason for treating me the way they did’. this is not to say that every victim watching this will internalize this message, but people also look up to these characters. there can be a degree of influence from the story onto oneself and thats the dangerous part.

conclusion

all in all dream is a shitbag asshole and probably shouldnt get a redemption because it would not be pog thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[takerfoxx]

The Owl House, Season 2, Episode 1, "Stranger Tides," First Impressions!

Yo ho, yo ho, it's a pirate's whaler's life for Luz!

Now, if you'll recall, a common problem I ran into while reviewing season 1 is that while I was definitely enjoying it, it was so episodic that I often found it difficult to find something new to say about each episode. There wasn't a whole lot carrying over from one episode to the next that I could really sink my teeth into and fill out a full review, with the plot not really kicking in until the final two episodes.

Fortunately, I did not have that problem here, and now that season 2 has started, I have PLENTY to say about its debut episode.

So, this is what you'd expect for the first episode of the new season, an episode basically intended to bring everyone up to speed on how the characters are dealing with the ramifications of the previous season and introduce a few new elements that will set the tone for the season to come.

And basically, things at the Owl House are...not really great. I mean, sure, everyone got away and it looks like Emperor Belos hasn't really made their recapture a priority (most likely deliberately), but thanks to Lilith deciding to share Eda's curse to neutralize it, they both have found themselves powerless. They're not completely without magic, but what they have left is so meager to be practically useless. All expect for Eda's detachable limbs. Those still work. For Luz, as she never had magic to begin with and had to work extra hard to get around that handicap and find ways to keep up with everyone else, that means she's suddenly the breadwinner of the family, the one with the most power despite living with two (previously) notoriously powerful witches, and thus has taken up bounty hunting (sort of ironic, if you ask me). For Lilith, that means coming to terms with losing literally everything important to her, from her power to her position as the Emperor's Coven's poster girl, having been replaced by a spoiled teen prodigy (and oh, ho, ho, we will get to him!) as well as her own feelings of guilt for having cursed Eda in the first place.

Actually, guilt is the main motivator in this episode. Luz feels guilty for having gotten Eda trapped and that Eda now has to prioritize what little money they have for Luz's sake, which motivates her to take on more and more dangerous bounties to try to make it up to her. And Lilith feels rotten for the curse and that the fix ended up sapping Eda's powers, so she's driven to find some way of making herself useful, which fills out this episode's A-plot and B-plot.

Meanwhile, Eda herself is...handling things like a champ, actually. Sure, she's not thrilled about losing her power, nor does she care for the sudden dip in respect from the locals as a result, but she's not wallowing in self-pity. No, she's working and innovating, finding ways to adapt and keep ahead of the game. And to rip off the Empire too, because fuck those guys.

So anyway! Let's start with our A-plot: Luz the bounty hunter. She's doing her best to keep her spirits up and keep food on the table, but bounty hunting is a tough job and because everyone knows that Eda is powerless, the bondsman has no problem ripping them off because he knows he can get away with it. Furthermore, with the portal gone, Luz's messages to her mom aren't getting through, which is weighing on her mind.

Okay, we already know that Luz's mom is probably going to get involved this season. I predict that at some point, Emperor Belos completes his repairs of the portal, and when he does, all those unsent message will suddenly spill out all at once, giving good ol' Mama a heart attack.

Sort've serves her right though, because, you know, G-RATED CONVERSION THERAPY!

But anyway, she overhears Eda talking about eschewing her booze in favor of getting Luz food she can actually eat, so she resolves to make it up to her by taking on the biggest bounty of them all, which so happens to be a magical creature called a Selkie-dama, which requires her to join a ship that's setting out to do that so she could get a cut.

A ship that just so happens to be under the command of Lilith's replacement, who also so happens to be the mysterious spy working for Emperor Belos that we met last season, whom we will get to!

Anyway, they fortunately rush through the bit of Luz proving herself to the crew, because who cares, King finds out agent's private room (in a reveal that calls back to a similar scene in Gravity Falls) and gets captured, and they find the Selkie-Dama, in which Luz shows us how far she's come by utterly wrecking shit.

Unfortunately, the bounty is stolen by a mysterious figure, and Luz isn't about to get ripped off again, so she goes after them, only to find that that SURPRISE, it's Eda, who figured she'd cut out the middleman and just steal the bounty directly, because you have to admit that that does make sense.

But anyway, none of that matters, because that's when HE finally is properly introduced.

Hear that? That's the sound of thousands of thirsty fangirls (and quite a few fanboys and fanenbys as well) shrieking.

Meet the Golden Guard. Yes, he's arrogant. Yes, he's sassy as fuck. Yes, he's voiced by Zeno Robinson. And according to his brief appearance in the OP...

HE'S A PALE-HAIRED PRETTY BOY, Y'ALL!!!

So. We now have this season's small antagonist.

And since Luz is the only resident of the Owl House with any real power (Hooty aside, but we'll get to that) and now with Amity as Luz's close friend (more on that later as well), that makes him Luz's new rival! Ooooh, I can smell the Enemies to Lovers fics already!

Yeah, it's gonna be a HUGE ship, but that's no prediction, everyone knew that anyway.

But while I doubt they're actually going to get together (though count on our bi-queen Luz getting smitten once she sees his face), I do smell a redemption arc for this guy. I mean, why would they make him so likeable otherwise?

Yes, he was a jerk, but he was a jerk in an endearingly entertaining sort of way.

But beyond that, I do note that he also has a tech-powered staff (seems to be the same one that held the palisman that Belos fed off of last season, but with an upgrade), and wields the same flesh-based magic as well. Now, his ears do show that he's not a human, but I still wonder if all that tech magic (which has to be manipulating the flesh of the Titan itself) is either a crutch for the magicless or a shortcut for those who want power fast.

Also, in addition to slotting in as Luz's rival, he also has taken Lilith's place as the face of the Emperor's Coven and also uses Eda's "BYYYEEEEE!!!" catchphrase, he's set up to be a foil to just about everybody!

Anyway, he's not here to take them out just yet, but instead forces them to kill the Selkie-dama. They don't, of course, and instead trick him into thinking that they did, but it does show that 1. Emperor Belos is content to leave them be for the moment, and 2. Emperor Belos is seeking the destruction of magical creatures. Huh.

Also, called it on Luz becoming Eda's teacher when it comes to glyphs.

But speaking of rivals and ships, the question over all of this is Amity, who's been MIA with a broken leg for a while. No doubt she's not going to be upset about Luz being stuck in the Boiling Isles, but if Luz does start crushing on Prettyboy Golden Guard, I can see her feel all sorts of upset about that. I still thinking that Lumity is endgame, but now she's got to work for it, and there is going to be angst.

Anyway, our B-plot has Lilith trying to make things up for Eda, by putting together a scrying potion to spy on the Emperor's castle. Nice, will probably be important later, but the real important part, in addition to her getting over her pride (not an easy thing) was the surprisingly touching friendship she's building with Hooty of all people! I didn't see this coming, but they honestly have some great comedic chemistry.

And honestly, I can see it. Lilith's first introduction to Hooty was him opening a can of whoopass on her and her men, and now he does it again to save her from the fire bees. Sure, he's weird and annoying, but he's strong and competent as hell, something that she would naturally respect. I honestly like what they have building, and the Lulu and Hooticifer nicknames were adorable.

And now, onto our brief glimpse of Belos, who still managed to steal the whole damned episode with just a few words. We see he's gone that long, white hair thing going for him, so not a rogue palisman. So, human or shortcut-exploiting conman. Regardless, just as he seems content to leave the Owl House be despite Luz having the key (which will definitely be important later), he also seems aware of the scrying, and has no problem letting it go on.

Okay, this season is shaping up to be a great one. And next episode is an Amity episode, in which her parents meet Luz, so let's fucking GOOOOOOOOOOO!!! on the Lumity teases and oh God NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! on the awkward cringe comedy that is sure to result!

[quicksilversquared]

Helpfulness with a Side of Spite

Superheroes are kind. Superheroes are patient. Superheroes are helpful.

....that doesn’t mean that superheroes can’t manipulate the situation, though. And they’ll do it with a smile on their face.

links in the reblog

Superheroes were, practically by definition, meant to be helpful.

Ladybug and Chat Noir helped all of Paris by fighting supervillains and restoring the city. They helped save lives and property alike if they happened to be nearby when a bus or news helicopter went out of control. They saved cats that were stuck up in trees and helped parents with young kids evacuate when there were akuma attacks nearby. They even helped out spoiled brats and snotty liars who were getting targeted, even if they definitely didn't deserve the help.

It was one of the reasons why they were so liked, really. Paris' superheroes weren't aloof or cold or focused only on their job and their job alone. They went out of their way to reach out and make sure that people were okay.

….but even the most patient of superheroes had their limits. There were only so many times that Ladybug could put up with Chloe's clinging and endless babble when, despite Chloe's assurances, she had definitely done something to tick the unfortunate akumatized person off and therefore entirely deserved to be the target of their ire. And really, trying to help Lila at all during akuma attacks was a waste of effort, since she seemed determined to fake injuries and try to distract them. But it was still expected that they at least try to help, because- well, they were superheroes.

Still, being a superhero didn't necessarily mean having superhuman patience. And even though it was still early in the morning- they hadn't even finished homeroom yet- Lila was already wearing Marinette's patience thin.

Really, it was an impressive accomplishment, considering that Lila was "out of town" on one of her mother's "trips" and therefore not even physically in the classroom. But she had video-called in first thing after homeroom started to give an overly saccharine-sweet "recounting" of what she had been up to the previous few days. This time she was calling from "the fjords of Finland, I wish you guys could be here because it is gorgeous!" and prattling on about some princess that she had supposedly met and was discussing charity work with.

Marinette could not envision anything being a bigger waste of time. They could be catching up on curriculum that had gotten behind because of akuma attacks, but nope, no such luck. Instead, they were listening to Lila's completely made-up and not at all relevant stories and wasting their entire homeroom period. Lila had been yammering on for over forty-five minutes now, and showed no sign of stopping.

(Also, Marinette had some serious questions about how Lila was supposedly getting enough internet to support the call while on a hill overlooking one of the most spectacular of the Finnish fjords, which was decidedly not close to any sort of civilization.)

At least Marinette had started bringing projects to school to work on during their calls with Lila. If they couldn't use their time productively for schoolwork during homeroom, then she would take the chance to get some of her other work done. Maybe Ms. Bustier frowned on it, but. Well. Marinette had more or less ceased to care. She had too much to get done to be too concerned with what did or didn't bother her teacher, particularly when what she was doing wasn't hurting anyone.

"So I'll be out for the rest of this week and maybe a couple days next week," Lila chirped at long last, beaming at them. "Depending on whether I can persuade Princess Sophia to join Prince Ali and I on our global campaign to end pollution! I'll keep you all updated!"

The entire class exploded with assurances, everyone hastening to tell Lila that they were sure that she would be able to get the princess to help, and how amazing it was that she was doing such great work, and how everybody was sure to pitch in and help her get caught back up on her schoolwork once she returned to Paris. Lila basked in the attention, gushing about how kind everyone was and how lucky she was to get placed in what had to be the world's nicest class.

Which of course meant a whole new round of people telling Lila that she was nice and kind and fantastic, too.

Barf.

Finally, finally, Lila signed off after another few rounds of back-and-forth gushing. Marinette let out a sigh of relief, plenty glad that she wouldn't have to listen to Lila's humble-bragging for another couple days. The far-fetched stories that Lila had been spinning- seriously, how were people believing that Lila had somehow saved a beloved prized cow herd with only the help of their traditional decorative cowbells- had been grating on her nerves.

Cows with decorate cowbells wasn't even a Finnish thing. Somehow, Lila (and everyone else in the class, with the sole exception of Adrien) had forgotten that that was a Swiss tradition.

It was probably too much to expect that Lila would actually pay any attention to details like that. For her, differences between countries and cultures were probably annoying little details that she didn't feel like bothering with.

"Well, we won't be doing anything as exciting as discussing anti-pollution plans with a princess today, but we do have plenty of other things to cover," Ms. Bustier announced as soon as the call ended, glancing up at the clock. "We're actually running a little behind schedule in Literature, so let's use the last, ah, three minutes of homeroom to try to get a bit of a head start so we won't have to have as much make-up homework this weekend!"

Marinette could only sigh and hope that the rest of the day wouldn't be so incredibly exasperating.

Because right now? She didn't feel like being very helpful at all.

  By the time news of an akuma out and about reached the school in the early afternoon, Marinette was almost relieved at the excuse to leave for a bit. It seemed like everywhere she turned, people were talking about Lila's latest so-called adventures- so much for not having to put up with it for at least a couple more days- and speculating about what new royal support might mean for Lila's campaign. And as if that wasn't bad enough, Ms. Bustier had pulled Marinette to the side between classes to tell her off for her obvious disinterest during Lila's video call, so Marinette's mood had slid even further downhill.

And now? Well, she was in the mood to work out some of her frustrations on Hawkmoth's latest minion.

But not too obviously, of course. People would wonder if they saw her punch an akuma's face in, just because she was pretending that it was Lila's. Besides, whoever was under the akumatization was a victim, as she and Chat Noir were always reminding the press and the people that akumas had targeted. They weren't in control of what they were doing.

(Well. Mostly. There had been some exceptions, largely consisting of Lila, but proving that enough to be able to persuade anyone in power was a bit difficult. On top of that, once the first accusation of on-purpose collusion with Hawkmoth stuck, then- well, it could easily turn into a slippery slope lined with baseless accusations from people out looking for revenge.)

Though to be fair, it honestly seemed as though this particular akuma completely deserved whatever beating Ladybug gave her. Best-Laid Plans seemed entirely entitled, screaming in fury whenever her "foolproof" plots to capture Ladybug and Chat Noir were defeated and yelling about how dare they not fall fire her traps, how dare they not believe whatever she said, how dare they laugh at how (laughably) easy and transparent her so-called complex plans to catch them were.

Honestly, she and Lila would probably get along fantastically. Both of them had some serious delusions of grandeur.

"I can't figure out how she thinks these things are foolproof and complex when she can't spend more than a couple minutes seeing them up," Chat Noir said as he yanked the side off of another "hidden" cage and chucked it off to the side so that it wouldn't pose them any danger. "They're impulsive and showy but lack any real substance."

Best-Laid Plans let out another screech of fury. "Stop making fun of them, they're foolproof!"

"Right, because even fools would be safe from them!" Ladybug yelled back. "Because they fool no one!"

"How dare you, I learned how to make traps from an expert in Bolivia! You're just getting lucky!"

"She does realize that claiming that doesn't somehow make it true, right?" Ladybug sighed, utterly exasperated. They had wasted half an hour already, and she really wasn't in the mood for another half hour of this nonsense. "Lucky Charm!"

A bottle of soap dropped into her hand. Ladybug sighed, then glanced around as she and Chat Noir sprinted after Best-Laid Plans. She was heading up, up, up the Eiffel Tower, fast but not fast enough to outrun the superheroes.

"There's another trap there," Chat Noir pointed out as they leapt up another level. "I bet she's planning on pushing us in."

An idea clicked in Ladybug's mind. Of course! "She's going to stop on the next platform- hit the soap bottle right at her as we pass, hard enough for it to split! And- now!"

It was practically a work of art, really. Ladybug tossed her Lucky Charm at Chat Noir, who hit it at just the right time. Sudsy pink soap sprayed across the platform, completely coating it. The split bottle and what little soap remained in it slammed into Best-Laid Plans' face, sending her staggering right into the slippery puddle of soap.

And she slid, cursing up a storm, right off the edge of the platform and neatly into the trap she had set up below.

"Well, would you look at that," Chat Noir said cheerfully as he and Ladybug swung down to land next to the soap-covered Best-Laid Plans. "Your traps can catch one person, at least! So they're not entirely fool-proofed after all."

Ladybug nearly choked on her laughter as she snagged Best-Laid Plans' cell phone, snapping it in half and catching the butterfly that fluttered free. The akuma only glared, furious but unable to do anything with the ropes of her trap twisted around her arms and keeping them bound.

Really, it was art.

After a moment's pause to appreciate the sight a little more, Ladybug snagged the remnants of the soap bottle with her yo-yo and tossed them into the air. "Miraculous Ladybug!"

The glittering swarm rushed around the city, wiping away all of the destroyed traps and putting things back to normal. Once everything else was fixed, the light swept around Best-Laid Plans and left a sulking Lila Rossi in her place.

Somehow, Ladybug was not entirely surprised.

"Surprise," Chat Noir sighed, rolling his eyes as he stepped up to her side. "Gee, and wasn't she meant to be out of the country right now?"

Deep in Ladybug's brain, there was a distinct aha as an idea was born, and Ladybug pounced on it. Pasting on her best friendly-helpful-neighborhood-superhero look, she approached Lila, who only looked more sour.

"You must have been really upset about whatever plans didn't quite work out!" Ladybug told her, trying her best to sound sympathetic instead of smug. "It's always disappointing when things don't work out the way we want them to, but it's rarely the end of the world!"

Chat Noir nodded seriously, only the twitching corners of his lips giving away the fact that he was maybe not quite as sincere as he was pretending to be. "Exactly! If we miss a movie, there's always another viewing. If we can't go out with friends, there's always another day. It's not worth getting too upset about, because then we miss out on other stuff. I'd say just let it go and move on with the rest of your day."

Lila looked mutinous. Ladybug had to assume that whatever plans had been foiled hadn't exactly been the sort that could just be picked up and done another day. "Uh-huh."

"Chat Noir is right," Ladybug said immediately in her perkiest voice, cheerfully ignoring Lila's deepening scowl. "It's best not to linger too much over plans that didn't work out and just go back to your normal day instead. In fact, to help you get back to your normal day, I'll even give you a free ride back to school, so you don't miss even more class! You're at Collège Françoise Dupont, right?"

Without waiting for an answer, Ladybug grabbed Lila and hoisted her over her shoulder before the other girl could realize what was going on and object. She and Chat Noir were usually more careful when carrying civilians- after all, the over the shoulder carry wasn't very comfortable- but she definitely wasn't keeping Lila in any position where she could make a grab for her earrings. "See you, Chat Noir!"

Chat Noir waved back, looking suspiciously like he was struggling to not double over laughing. "See you, Ladybug!"

With that, Ladybug was off, jumping off of the Eiffel Tower and letting herself do a free-fall for perhaps a little longer than she normally would before casting out her yo-yo and swinging at top speed towards the school.

She really couldn't tell if Lila's screaming was in fear or in anger.

It took almost no time at all for the school to draw near, and Ladybug did some hasty calculations to figure out where to go- her class should still be in Literature, though they would be switching pretty soon- before aiming right at the window Ms. Bustier had opened earlier in the day and dropping neatly in.

"Ta-da, back in class!" Ladybug announced cheerfully, dumping Lila back on her feet with perhaps a little more force than necessary. Lila staggered and nearly fell before catching herself. "And it looks like they managed to start up class again after you got akumatized! That's good, I know that sometimes after people get akumatized in school, the whole day just gets entirely disrupted. And I'm sure you wouldn't want to be the cause of your class falling behind on their work!" She sent the class a smile, then jumped straight back out the window with a wave. As soon as she did, the class exploded with noise, confusion clearly reigning supreme.

Ladybug only smiled.

  By the time Marinette slipped back into the classroom, there was such mayhem going on that no one noticed her come in. Lila had clearly tried to spin a new story to cover why Ladybug had brought her to class- and how she had gotten akumatized when she was meant to be several countries away- but this time, no one was buying it.

In fact, Marinette noticed as she slipped back to her seat, Mr. Damocles had already been called in and was currently punching a number into his phone. No doubt Lila's mom was being called now that there was solid evidence that that Lila had not been where she was supposed to be. It was definitely long overdue, honestly, but better late than not at all.

Adrien slid into his seat a minute later with a politely puzzled look on his face, apparently having missed the commotion with a poorly-timed bathroom visit. He caught sight of Marinette, pretty much the only other student still sitting in her spot, and raised a curious eyebrow.

"Lila got akumatized and Ladybug was being helpful and brought her back to class," Marinette whispered, unable to hide her grin. "And, well…"

"Now she's in trouble because clearly she wasn't in Finland," Adrien finished. He grinned back. "Somehow I suspect that Ladybug might have known that Lila hadn't been in class in the first place."

Marinette bit back a tart I don't know what you're talking about before she could give herself away. She wasn't sure why Adrien would suspect that Ladybug would know about Lila's lie about not being in the country, but- well, maybe it was because he had seen Ladybug call Lila out before, and it wasn't exactly normal for her and Chat Noir to return civilians to wherever they had been at the start of the fight.. They only did it for young kids, really, and only if they had enough time left before they detransformed.

So maybe she hadn't been very subtle, so sue her. But at least now Lila wouldn't be able to carry out whatever no doubt nefarious plan that she had been dreaming up. It had already then thwarted once, and Ladybug hadn't been about to let Lila take another swing at it, despite what she and Chat Noir had said about trying again.

"Hopefully she won't get akumatized again," Adrien added after a minute. Up in the front, Lila was in full meltdown mode, but no one seemed particularly inclined to comfort her. Mr. Damocles had clearly gotten through to Lila's mom and had retreated to the corner to try to hold a conversation uninterrupted by the commotion. "I mean, Ladybug and Chat Noir have already fought her today, I'm sure they don't want to again." He grimaced. "I'd hope that Hawkmoth would be tired of her by now, but considering how many times Mr. Pigeon has showed up, that….might be too much to hope for."

Marinette made a face at that. True, another Lila akumatization would be less than ideal, but on the bright side, if she got akumatized at school, then hopefully classes would be canceled for the afternoon and no one would notice her missing. Besides, well… "I'm sure they'd rather just deal with her being akumatized again today than being akumatized several dozen more times in the next couple months, because she is totally on track to do that."

"Ooh, good point."

"And honestly, if anyone is going to get akumatized today, I would guess that it would be one of our classmates," Marinette added, glancing around. People were clearly ticked off about the lies Lila had told, with all of the connections that she had promised and the "industry advice" that she had given people getting their hopes up. Now those hopes were dashed, and people had to come to terms with the fact that someone who they thought was a friend- a friend that they had gone out of their way to help more than a few times- had been outright lying to them to manipulate them. That had to stink, and she was sure that some people would be particularly upset. "Oh, poor Rose. She looks like she's about to cry."

"And Alya looks like she's about to commit a murder," Adrien added. There was an edge of laughter to his voice. "But she's still filming, at least."

Marinette looked and had to try not to laugh herself. It seemed like Alya was torn between chewing Lila out and getting her scoop, so she had combined the two in what could only be described as an accusatory interview given in a yell with less-than-flattering angles.

Well. Whatever made her feel better, she supposed.

"All right class, that's enough!" Ms. Bustier finally yelled over the noise. Mr. Damocles had clearly given up on making his phone call in the room and had fled. "Everyone, to your seats, we're going to continue class as normal until further notice- yes, that includes you too, Lila. Just borrow some paper and a pencil, since you didn't come prepared. And now, back to the lesson-"

Marinette exchanged a grin with Adrien as slowly, everyone filtered back to their seats. Most people were clearly in a state of shock still, but others were whispering, comparing stories and trying to figure out where they had missed the signs where things didn't quite line up. The gossip and speculation continued even as Ms. Bustier resolutely tried to forge on with her lesson, questions about what had happened reigning supreme.

The rest of the story came out less than an hour later, during an easily-overheard shouting match between Lila and her mom inside of Mr. Damocles' office.

As it turned out, Lila hadn't intended to get akumatized at all this time around. She had gotten so upset partway through the day because she had gotten an email- an email that should have been sent to her mom, but apparently the email on file was Lila's instead- that said that, given her test scores and the absolute piles of unreturned makeup work from during her trips, the school would not be able to approve any further travels for the rest of the school year and- even worse- she was in serious danger of having to repeat the grade. She had been furious- there was no real way for her to lie her way out of that- and, well, the rest was history.

And Lila was soon to be history, if Alix was to be believed. She had managed to keep hiding nearby after the rest of the class was busted for skipping class and eavesdropping, and had caught more of the fight. Lila's mom was removing her from Paris effective immediately- apparently she had a very strict aunt and uncle back in Italy who would be willing to take her until either Mrs. Rossi could be transferred to a different embassy or Hawkmoth was no longer an issue. In fact, because of Hawkmoth, Lila was going to be sent back to Italy that evening, before she could get akumatized again.

Marinette honestly couldn't be more relieved about that. Lila's akuma forms tended towards the difficult and more indirect than a lot of other akumas, and she got akumatized often. With her gone- and with the class relieved that Lila was getting properly punished for lying to them- the chance of more Lila-related akumas was steadily dropping.

"What I think is funny is that, if Ladybug hadn't done anything, Lila still wouldn't have lasted much longer," Marinette told Tikki as she headed home after school, completely unable to hide the spring in her step. "She wouldn't have been able to go on any more 'trips' and Mr. Damocles would definitely have to reach her mom about the whole being held back thing, so all of the lies would have come out. Ladybug just sped it up." She grinned. "And maybe it was a bit fun to see everyone's reactions." She paused. "...and maybe it was a bit fun to get my revenge, too."

Tikki giggled too, clearly amused. "I bet it was pretty funny to see everyone's faces! And at least now you don't have to worry about Lila anymore. I bet that people will forget about her pretty quickly once she's gone."

"I hope so." Marinette glanced back at the school before she stepped into the bakery. More people than normal were still lingering, no doubt gossiping about everything that had happened and trying to come to terms with the betrayal. Her class was resilient, though, and they would move on. Maybe there would be some lingering disappointment about the hopes and dreams they had pinned on Lila's lies, but it would fade with time.

After all, Lila Rossi wasn't worth their time or energy.

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / SEPTEMBER 27, 2019 // the poisoner

hi yall its been two full weeks since the last ep which means carson's been in jail for two weeks so on with the rewatch 🥳

-"it's all my fault" love how shes still making other peoples traumas about her

-"tell him yourself" of course the best advice comes from a woman here (yay adults!!)

-something about nancy not eating d/t stress + george's mom making food for her after being possessed (bc moms cook and nancy doesnt have one? idk)(carson makes meals but they always get interrupted thats a future ep bullet point lmaooo)

-that is a HUGE fucking cake lmfaooooo

-"she talks to my mom" think i mentioned this previously but something about george --> george's mom + bess & nancy /like victoria has this relationship with these girls who dont have moms, which is ironic bc victoria can barely be a mom to her own kids (& wondering if george is taking her mom for granted or jealous that she helps these other momless girls but not her own girls)

-"i'm the worst" again with the melodrama like can u stop 🙄

-"Hi." - this moment really made me ship nace honestly

-look at nick swooping in to take the heat for nance

-lmfaoooo w/ her fighting w/ herself like this to look it up or not (+ace stalking in the bg lmaoo)

-living for this side part of hers honestly

-"where you punched a bookcase near my head?" okay you were acting crazy too bitch

-BESS in the office 😂 the unsubtle queen

-"you okay?" 😔

-switching to the actual video footage of her recording was the perfect opportunity to have the killer close a laptop screen or something to make it look like they were watching 🤦🏼‍♀️

-okay real talk. someone PLEASE explain to me what owen, nick, and bess were trying to bargain/bribe ryan with during this whole conversation

-"you're not your father, are you?" oh foreshadowing my good and loyal friend

-so in all honesty when owen broke that ghost trap i thought it was connected to how tiffany had possesed george (bc she was a freshly dead new ghost looking for a body to inhabit) and that owen had been nearby when sebastians ghost popped up and just possessed owens lil body until he took over owen's chi and became "owen" just to make up for having died on the bonny scot combined with how everyone thought he was sus and thats why owen broke the ghost trap bc he was actually a ghost. but it turns out it was just foreshadowing his death and the agleaca 🙄

-love how intuitive owen is w/ bringing nancy food here like he just knows shes been neglecting it and wants to see her eat in front of him so he knows shes eaten lately

-ACE with the sneak over nancy on the obits drawing her to the claw 0/1 high card rules

-"i'm the reason another person gets killed" damn sis how many fucking times can u blame urself for someone elses trouble

-bess's little smirks with these obits are so inappropriate but so funny lmfaooo

-absolutely loving ryans manipulations against mom here

-i knew that couple who walked past her in the car were super weird but i would never have thought they were ghosts

-"hero of horseshoe bays friends" vs "theyre not my friends" 🥺

-LOVE how she takes her beanie off when shes not alone anymore 😂😂

-i get being-dragged marks but how on earth do u know peoples shoe sizes from eyeballing prints??? (i mean i know my shoe size but if theyre limited stock then i get what i can get u know)

-i ship george/her crowbar

-"i failed my drivers test the first time i took it" okay bitch so did i lmaooo i didnt get ice cream tho i just got screamed at

-yes dr. nick show me that chemistry Phd

-wish claire would have gone into more detail about what fascinates her about heroes (false pretenses maybe? exaggerations made by press? wishing to strip heroes of their power by taunting them with perfect crimes? she probs did get off on getting away w it lmaooo not funny tho)

-okay. i can safely say claire would be me in this scenario with modified rare ass poison, a short list, and somehow getting away with it for years

-how does claire not notice her ring being taken??

-PRO FRIEND GRABBING THE PURSE GEORGE

-so actually george had the chem degree here, nice

-george + that hand on nancy's leg 😌👌🏻

-as a mom lucy must be so pissed here, "WHAT are u doing dying right now?? after all i went through to keep u alive?? unbelievable"

-love claire's instant fake limp at seeing ace lmfaoooo

-you did a good job. 💙

-i like how bess fusses at the end to make up for missing the drama

-"i'll sit this one out" nick says that in ep 2 bc he misses the morgue caper, then george misses the lilac inn sneak, (#saltcircleprobs) then ace misses the seance and now bess misses the poisoner 🤷🏼‍♀️ #justnoticingthings

-"why do you always show up?" what a fucking bitch slap lmfaooooo nancy is literally the worst sometimes 😂 like first the constant pity party of "all ills in the world ever are all my fault" and now literally sassing the people who helped u when u didnt deserve it by asking this rude ass question in the RUDEST WAY POSSIBLE?? nah sis lmaooo

-loving her hair here tho (her half up half downs are the best)

-"she found me though. when i was dying." 💙

and lastly

-"what are friends for?" LMFAOOOOOOO NICK U FUCKING SAVAGE good on u for reinforcing ur boundaries and not falling back in with the toxic ex 😌🙏🏻

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Home - Part 21

A/N- Thank you to everyone who’s still reading! I think there’s gonna be one more part and an epilogue then this will be done :) 💕 

32 weeks Pregnant

"Im so over being pregnant now Wanda you have no idea!" I moaned as we sat in the newly decorated nursery folding the baby clothes id washed through. The extension was finished and Bucky, Steve and Sam had done a great job of doing the twins nursery.

Wanda had been amazing helping me with the girls, i was always so tired nowadays.

"I bet, it looks uncomfortable now. Im glad I'm only having the one!" She laughed holding a hand against her own tiny bump, she and Sam had found out she was pregnant 4 months ago.

"I told Bucky id be the size of a house with these boys! You've seen the size of him so its no surprise is it!" I laughed shaking my head as i rubbed the side of my stomach.

"You okay?" Wanda asked looking concerned.

"Yeah think I've got a foot digging in somewhere.... their running out of room in here now"

"Not long now hun"

"Im counting down the weeks, this whole pregnancy has flown by up until now! Now its taking forever"

"You getting nervous?"

"A little bit, but mostly i just want them here already"

"When is Bucky due back from his trip?"

"Later tonight, it was meant to be tomorrow but he won the case, it all got settled a lot earlier than he thought it would, his driving back tonight"

"Do you want me stay over until he gets home?"

"Its fine Wand his already arranged for Steve to stay when he gets back with the girls and stay until his home"

"Thats okay then, i just didn't want you being on your own"

"Im never on my own lately" i shook my head and laughed.

"Their very protective" she agreed, they had been terrible lately! One of them was always with me incase anything happened. The only reason they weren't here now was because Wanda was here!

"I know they mean well but they are driving me crazy! Every time i go to get up their there! I cant even go to the bathroom without questions"

"That would drive me crazy too! I'll kick Sam's ass if he does that!".

We spent another 30 minutes or so sorting the clothes and other bits before heading downstairs for some tea. Not long after that Steve got back with the girls, he had taken them to the zoo for the day and they all looked exhausted... Steve included!

"Hey you guys, have you had a nice day?" I asked as Allie and Brooke came straight over and cuddled up to me.

"Yeah it was soooo good" Allie smiled up at me before stroking my huge bump.

"Hi baby brothers! I missed you"

"I just felt a kick" Brooke laughed holding a hand to the side of my tummy where i had been feeling it before.

"Looks like they missed their big sisters huh?" I smiled at them both.

"Im gonna head home now Steve's back to keep you company. Call me if you need anything" Wanda said hugging me goodbye before saying goodbye to Steve and the girls and heading off.

It didn't take long for me to fall asleep once Wanda had left. Steve ordered some pizza's for the girls dinner because he didn't want to wake me up, when i finally did wake up the pains in my side were back with a vengeance!

"You okay sweetheart?" Steve asked looking worried.

"Yeah just getting uncomfortable.... would you be okay keeping an eye on the girls while i go take a bath, see if it eases off a bit. They might move a bit so its not so bad"

"Yeah sure"

"thanks Steve" i gave him a smile and went up to the bathroom.

STEVE'S POV

I was sitting in the living room watching The Lion King with the girls when i heard Y/N calling for me.

"Steve...?....STEVE!!"

"What??" I called back rushing upstairs to the bathroom "What is it??!" I asked from the other side of the door.

"Erm...I think the babies are coming!" She called back sounding like she was freaking out.

"Oh shit..... have your waters broke?!"

"How do i know im in the tub!! All i know is it hurts like a bitch!"

"Okay. Okay.... let me call Sam and Wanda to come look after the girls and i'll take you to the hospital"

"Call Bucky!! If this is it i want him there!"

"Okay im calling him now" i told her pulling out my cell and dialling Bucky.

"Steve...." she said quietly from inside the bathroom.

"Yeah sweetheart?"

"Im gonna need you to help me out of the tub..... i can't do it on my own"

Oh shit!

"Hey Steve, everything okay?" Bucky answered after the second ring.

"No Buck! No! Everything is not okay! I think Y/N's having the babies and now i have to go help her out of the tub!"

"What?? But its too early! This isn't supposed to be happening yet!!" Bucky said loudly "I'm still a couple hours out.... erm can you get her to the hospital and i'll meet you there?.... call Becca to come watch the kids...."

"Im gonna call Sam and Wanda their closer, Wanda said to call if we needed anything"

"Okay that works"

"Buck, what about the fact i gotta get your girl outta the tub??"

"Steve!! Will you hurry up for fuck sake!" Y/N yelled through the door.

"Just do it pal, you gotta help her for me"

"Okay, I'm gonna put you on speaker...."

As i opened the bathroom door i stuck my head in slowly and let out a sigh of relief when i saw she had pulled her towel over her to hide her nakedness.

"Did you reach Buck?"

"Im here baby" Bucky said as i put the phone down on the counter and went to help her up from the tub.

"Bucky..... how long are you gonna be?"

"Couple hours tops....i'll be there i promise! But i need you to go with Steve. His gonna stay with you until i get there"

"Okay".

Once i helped Y/N out of the tub i wrapped a dry towel around her and helped her into the bedroom so she could get dressed.

"Im gonna call Sam while you get dressed, i'll be just outside if you need me" i told her with a reassuring smile.

Reader POV

I was still getting dressed when i heard the knocking at the front door.

"Uncle Steve, Uncle Sam and Auntie Wanda are at the door!" Brooke called up the stairs.

"Okay sweetheart, can you let them in please?"

"Okay"

"Steve, you can come in I'm dressed" i called to him, he came in and grabbed my bag i had packed for the hospital and then wrapped an arm around me to help me downstairs.

"You okay?" Wanda asked as soon as she saw me.

"Honestly i have no idea" i shook my head and laughed nervously "thanks for coming"

"No worries darlin'.... i blue lighted it here!" Sam laughed, that would explain how they got here so quick.

"Okay lets get you to the hospital.... i dont want to have to deliver these babies" Steve joked before leading me out to the car.

When we arrived at the hospital they took us straight through to a delivery room and made me change into a hospital gown (which Steve had to help with!) And then hooked me up to various machines to monitor mine and the babies heart beats. Id been here for over an hour now and the contractions were getting so much worse, i was already tired and i hadn't even gotten to the bad bit yet.... I'm pretty sure Steve hates me for squeezing his hand so tight every time a contraction hits, but he smiles through gritted teeth and tries to keep me calm.

"I want Bucky.... why is it taking so long?" I moaned after getting through a rather bad contraction.

"He'll be here soon sweetheart" Steve smiled brushing my sweaty hair back from my face.

"Thank you for staying with me Steve, I'm not sure how id be coping on my own" i told him truthfully "owww! Shit my back is cramping...."

"You can turn her onto her side and rub her back dad" a nurse that i hadn’t even noticed til now said to Steve as she checked the monitors.

"Oh... oh I'm not dad, I'm dad's best friend. His on his way"

"Oh sorry i just assumed. You can still help her out though" she shrugged.

"Sure, i can do that"

"Its fine you don't have to....." i started to say not wanting to make him uncomfortable.

"I got you, come on lets get you on your side" he smiled helping me roll onto my side so he could massage the cramp from my back.

"Oh my god Steve! You've got magic hands i swear!" I moaned as the pressure started to ease.

"Don't let Buck hear you moaning my name like that sweetheart he might kick my ass" he chuckled trying to make me laugh.

"Too late punk" came the voice of the man i was waiting for.

"Bucky! Your here!" I cried as he walked over and kissed me.

"I told you i would be didn't i?"

"I was just trying to help" Steve said quickly holding his hands up.

"I know, thanks Steve. Thanks for looking out for my girl" they exchanged a manly hug before Bucky took his place rubbing my back.

"Anytime, girls got a grip on her just a heads up. I think she broke my hand"  we all started laughing at that but the room fell silent when the alarm on one of the monitors started going off.

"What is that.....whats going on?!" I said panicking as the nurse came back in followed closely by the Doctor. The Doctor stood at the machine looking at a print out before turning to face us.

"Lay her on her back please.... at last one of the babies is in distress" the doctor said. Bucky helped me turn onto my back again and the Doctor started pushing around at my stomach.

"Ow!!!" I cried out in discomfort squeezing Bucky's hand.

"What are you doing!?" Bucky snapped at him looking like he was ready to murder the doctor.

"Im trying to turn the babies a bit, i think one of them may have the cord trapped...." he said as he continued trying to manipulate the babies positioning. Suddenly the alarm stopped beeping and he stepped back to the machine.

"Y/N, i think we're going to have to perform a c-section. The babies are in distress and your not dilated enough yet to do this naturally. Usually we'd give you some medication to help you along but i really don't want to leave them much longer. The quicker we can get them out the better" 

"Okay.... whatever you think is best Doc. I just want my babies to be safe"

"Nurse go tell them to prep the OR"

"Yes Doctor" she said quickly before rushing out.

"Lets go have these babies shall we?"

I nodded at the Doctor and turned to look at Bucky "Buck im scared"

"You'll be fine baby, i'll be right there. You've got this" he smiled kissing me quickly.

"I'll wait in the waiting room, good luck sweetheart" Steve beamed down at me pressing a kiss to my head before hugging Bucky. The nurse came back with a porter who pulled my bed out and started wheeling me down towards the OR, Bucky walking along side me holding my hand as we got ready to meet our newest additions.

Home taglist: @jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @lumar014

@bbmommy0902 @past-perfect-future-tense @heathens-takeitsl0w @captainchrisstan @ladymelissastark @93generation @sebastianstansqueen @oceansxpurple @Imjstaghoststory @rainbowkisses31 @superavengerpotterstar @cap-just-said-language @booktease21 @ms-betsy-fangirl @wildest-dream- @michelehansel @thummbelina @abbylizy @sweetlittlegingy @lorabem @barnesandrogersworld @dumblani @broco8 @xxloki81xx @keithseabrook27 @jesseswartzwelder @saiyanprincessswanie @stormi-ames

[aqvarius]

[REVIEW] Her Love in the Force: Ayumu Shinonome - Who I Once Was

I got some pretty good reception on my previous Episode 0 review, so I thought I would share my thoughts on Shinonome’s Who I Once Was as well. It’s not so much a review as much as just my personal thoughts on what this Episode 0 contributes to Ayumu’s past and future, some character analysis on Shinonome, Naru, AyumuxMC, Team Kaga, and why I think it tells us a lot about how I think Ayumu’s Love’s Trial route might play out.

Ayumu’s whole season so far has gone in a pretty different direction from everyone else’s. For example, one of the biggest differences is that his Love’s Battlefield route actually focusses more on his development rather than his MC’s (who frankly… gets little to no development). This is due to another big difference, which is how the role of Tsugaru is used to emphasise the changing dynamic between him and his MC due to their change in hierarchical divide. (I’m also currently working on a piece about how the MC’s dynamic with Team Tsugaru is used as a plot device for the key character and relationship developmental themes and how this differs from route to route, as well as what is consistent.) His Episode 0 does a similar thing.

When I read Soma’s Who I Once Was, it thrilled me because it helped contextualise and provide insight into his character by letting me retrospectively analyse his behaviours and traits in his earlier routes. This was important information since Soma is someone who doesn’t change much before and after joining Public Safety; his MC is the one who has the biggest effect on his changing attitude (and it’s something that he is conflicted about even into his second season). Therefore, his Episode 0 helped develop a more well-rounded picture of the version of him that we actually get to see.  Ayumu’s Who I Once Was does the opposite thing for me. While Ayumu’s Ep 0 does provide a lot more information about his past that we have never heard of (almost everything that happens in Kaga, Goto and Soma’s routes are things that they have already mentioned), what this does is help set up the direction that Ayumu’s future route is heading towards. If Goto’s and Soma’s Episode 0s help us understand where they came from, Ayumu’s tells us where he is going.

Typically, the rest of the PSD instructors join Public Safety to fulfil their vendettas, except Ishigami whose reason for joining Public Safety (apart from maybe his sister’s case) is never explicitly stated afaik because his Episode 0 is literally just about academy life with Kaga lmao. However, Ayumu has no personal tragedy that leads him specifically to Public Safety. He ends up there because of his own mistakes, and the act of joining Public Safety alone helps him to develop a sense of purpose. Contrast this with Goto and Soma, who are still lost in the mist of grief and vengeance even after joining Public Safety, or Kaga, who literally only just got closure on one aspect of his motivation and is still working on the other. For the others, joining Public Safety is a stepping stone to helping them get to where they want to be. For Ayumu, Public Safety finally gives him a sense of purpose and choice, meaning that the Ayumu we see in his MS1 is already markedly different from the version of him we see here in his Episode 0. Later, I will expand on why this is still not entirely him going on his ‘own’ path, but it is still a significant decision nonetheless.  

The path that brings Ayumu to Public Safety is influenced most strongly by two reasons, the former of which is influenced by the latter, and they are: (1) ennui; (2) his love for Sachi.

You may be thinking: how could you leave out Naru, who orchestrates the entire string of events that leads to Ayumu even first getting involved with the police? That’s because the reason that Naru even comes to learn of Ayumu is because of Ayumu’s ennui. So let’s begin with that.

Ayumu’s ennui stems from his privilege and his sense of obligation. We learn that he’s studying at T University (presumably Todai, a.k.a. Tokyo University, one of the country’s most elite institutions) to take over his family’s business (which is in electronics), but that he finds this unsatisfying. Because he thinks that he was adopted just to be the successor to the illustrious Shinonome house, he feels like he has to fulfil his role as heir. However, this is something that he finds personally unfulfilling. The reason for this is partially that he is just a genius who needs more intellectual stimulation. But more significantly, this is because he is struggling with his internal conflict over obligation to his parents (becoming the heir to Kochi Electronics) and his feelings for Sachi (becoming a police officer in the hopes that he will recognise him as her hero). Ayumu is someone who we know to be extremely concerned about his image – not just in the literal, physical sense, but also his whole persona. We know that Ayumu doesn’t even like to show his true self to his own parents; the only person that he’s ever been truly vulnerable around is Goldie. He protects his true feelings well and is quite prone to doing things to keep up an impression that other people have of him. At the same time, he is also someone who is not very communicative, and can often make assumptions about people’s intentions. This is one of the reasons why he is so inherently burdened by what he perceives to be the expectations of others.

Anyway, the different mindsets that he holds regarding these two options are illustrated particularly effectively through the two groups of his university ‘friends’. On the one hand, you have the guys, who are little more than schmoozy jerks who are only interested in one night stands and talking about their sexual conquests. They represent life as a future CEO, where Ayumu would be forced to network with people (and perhaps even become the type of person) who he finds shallow and frankly not worth his time. 

On the other hand, there’s Suo, who represents both a more idealistic and meaningful type of future and a choice that goes along with Ayumu’s goal of being Sachi’s hero, but this path is also something that he clearly is unsure about. Both of these options are ones which are based on what Ayumu thinks that other people want him to do, not because of his personal interest. This is why, quite predictably for a genius but also because he is trapped in a place where he feels he has no real control, Ayumu ends up unfulfilled.

This lack of fulfilment leads him to partake in something that is genuinely a personal interest of his: hobby hacking. We can tell that this is actually fulfilling to him not just because he’s exceptionally talented, does it a lot and says he enjoys it, but also because hacking is the only thing that he is sure about. This is expressed through the directness of his hacking style, which Naru becomes attracted to and praises as “straight to the goal, like a comet”. And this is why I would argue that Naru is less responsible for Ayumu’s ultimate trajectory than Ayumu’s own tedium, because it is the tedium and indecisiveness that Naru takes advantage of the most.

Kinda weird that they didn’t use a close up sprite of Shinonome to match Naru’s one tho. 

If you’ve played Ayumu’s Battlefield route, it’ll come as no surprise to you to know that Naru is manipulative. Honestly, I would go as far as to say I find him to be one of the most terrifying villains throughout HLITF. I won’t go too far into his character, but I want to talk a bit about the relationship between him and Ayumu. For all of his smarts, Ayumu falls into Naru’s trap so easily. This is because Naru recognises and targets certain weaknesses that he picks up, such as Ayumu’s disdain for those around him, which is why he taunts him that he can do better than being friends with those “kids” whose conversation is “way below your level”. 

He’s both stroking Ayumu’s ego and affirming his belief that the uni friends are immature. He does the same thing with the job situation, taunting him not just about Ayumu’s consideration of applying for a civil servant position but also about taking over the family business. Here, he recognises that Ayumu has reservations about both, and seduces him into taking a third option beyond those two: to focus on his hacking and join forces. Naru shows him that his current situation isn’t enough for someone as great as him, recognising Ayumu’s tedium and showing him a dangerous, challenging world.

Ayumu becomes tempted. I think the biggest clue that he has actually fallen into the trap deliberately set by Naru comes at this one point, where we see Ayumu’s internal monologue about how he is spending more and more time with Naru and on the hacking forum. He thinks that he should quit soon, since he was treating it just as a challenge and now knows where his level is. Naru interrupts this line of thought, saying “Too sweet”. He is commenting on the peach nectar, saying that it’s literally too sweet (too much sugar), but the same word 甘い in Japanese is also used to mean naïve, meaning that Naru could be calling Ayumu naïve (for being so easily manipulated). Obviously, Naru probably isn’t responding to Ayumu’s internal monologue since he can’t read minds, but from a reader’s perspective, I think that moment was quite deliberate. Maybe I’m just reading too much into things, but I found it to be both very clever and also quite haunting, especially since the next move that Naru makes is his first attempt to propose the hacking duel which ends up being a trap for Ayumu to allow Naru to steal confidential NPA data.

It’s also clever that Suo interrupts before he can go through with this proposal, since wholesome Suo represents an idealistic path towards justice.

Anyway, even after Naru, who has more or less lured Ayumu almost completely to the dark side, actually successfully proposes that battle, there is one thing stopping him from going through with it, and that leads us on to point number 2.

Let’s talk about Sachi.

She, and his love for her, are the only reason why he’s even considering a future in law enforcement at first. He says as much, that it’s not his dream. 

Those typical Ayumu character traits that I previously discussed in relation to his relationship with his parents make their reappearance. Firstly, the fact that he feels like he needs to keep up a certain image, which is demonstrated when he drinks coffee in front of her and lies about no longer drinking sweet beverages. In this case, he is trying to perform maturity. Secondly, his feeling of obligation: he feels obliged to Sachi to fulfil his promise that he’ll become a police officer in her stead. Thirdly, the fact that this feeling is self-imposed. Sachi never explicitly said “I want you to become a police officer.” He made that promise of his own accord, assuming that’s what she wanted. Ayumu is doing everything that he thinks is expected of him.

(We later find out that she never forgot and he was just assuming that she did)

Even his disillusionment at uni life and his friends to some extent stems from his feelings for Sachi. The main reason he sees those friends as immature is because they talk about nothing but girls and hooking up, even when they are getting top scores in tests. He even actively separates himself from them in this regard: when he thinks about their girl chat, his mind drifts to Sachi and he thinks about how he’s different.

Ayumu is a fool for love. We see the same thing happen over and over again even with his own MC: he’s surprisingly (not that surprising anymore haha) childish and emotional when it comes to his feelings. He is a one-woman man through and through, to the point where he is literally so head over heels that he often allows his feelings towards the subject of his love to dictate his actions. We like to think that Ayumu is so clever and calm and logical – and he can be, when it comes to work – but every mistake he makes in his Episode 0 is the result of an uncontrolled emotional response to being hurt by Sachi. He lost his virginity to a random one night stand when Sachi went on an overnight trip with her teacher. He’s resigned to throw away a future in law enforcement as a way to get back at Sachi because he thinks she’s forgotten her words. 

Think about it: he has no personal negative feelings about the police, not in the way that Soma does, for example. He sees the police agency as a place that’s associated with a promise with Sachi, and how he wants to be seen by her. I previously mentioned that Ayumu is someone who cares a lot about how people see him and is weighed down by a feeling of obligation that he imposes on himself. Thus, when he thinks that she isn’t even thinking of him anymore, he decides to go through with hacking them as a way to get back at her as well as to throw away his heavy feeling of obligation towards that promise. To be honest, every time he threw everything down just to listen to Sachi talk about another man was devastating to read every time. My heart just ached.

However, despite being the reason why he ultimately chooses to give in to Naru’s manipulation, Sachi is the one element about Ayumu that Naru doesn’t know about. What Naru doesn’t know is that all of these emotions that he used to taunt Ayumu lead back to Ayumu’s feelings for Sachi. Those college friends’ talk of hooking up is cheap next to his feelings for Sachi. His indecision over career is due to his internal conflict over whether he will just have his heart broken again. We know that his parents are such great people and keep encouraging him to do what he wants to do, but Ayumu actively chooses to disregard their sentiments in order to keep himself trapped as an excuse. 

To be honest, I think he is choosing to be in denial since he knows that even if he does go through his promise to Sachi and becomes a police officer, it wouldn’t change the fact that she loves some other guy, but he just is too afraid to admit that to himself honestly. He wants the choice to be taken away from him so he doesn’t have to take responsibility for the outcome. Let’s be real, refusing to admit his honest feelings to himself is one of Ayumu’s defining traits lol.

This is why I truly believe that Ayumu is the one man in HLITF who loves the hardest. At the end of the day, all of Ayumu’s choices and mistakes in his Episode 0 come down to his feelings for Sachi. His indecisiveness over his career, his disdain for college talk about hooking up, his conflicting feelings about law enforcement, even his choice to ultimately join Public Safety, almost his entire identity is based around Sachi. Personally, I really appreciate that the writers didn’t underplay how important she was to him and almost his entire past just to appease readers who want to forget about her. Even when the choice to join law enforcement becomes his own choice (bc of the bombing incident), he still relies on Sachi for strength. 

The reason I feel that way is because this is a demonstration of how strong Ayumu’s love is, but also because it just goes to show how much his MC changed him to make him able to forget about someone as important as Sachi and fall in love with her instead. And this is also why I believe, in Ayumu’s future Love’s Trial route, that Naru will be defeated because he will not be able to understand the level of depth and dedication that Ayumu’s love truly reaches, and how his words, actions, thoughts and entire world are shaped by his love for his girl.

Let’s revisit those three points of his character that I mentioned previously and see how they relate to his relationship with his MC – more specifically, how she has managed to overcome them.

1.       Needing to project a certain image. This defence mechanism is something that HLITF MC gradually wore down over the years through her relentless pestering but is dealt with most explicitly in Our Graduation Epilogue chapter 3. She wants to be his home, i.e. the place where he can be himself entirely without any pretence of trying to be cool.

2.       His feeling of obligation. This is something that isn’t as clear cut as a promise, but I would say that the closest thing to obligation here would be his role as her instructor. I think this is one of the reasons that he is so adamant about maintaining that teacher/student boundary and why he has always worked to bring out her innate strengths, because he feels obliged to her as an educator and mentor and that he has to fulfil this duty to her. That’s why he gets so worried about losing that dynamic, because he’s worried that he’ll lose his worth to her when that role no longer exists and that she won’t need him anymore. Luckily, she disproves that for him and shows that she’s actually more excited for that boundary to be dispersed.

3.       Being assumptive/imposing burdens on himself. This is related to what I previously explained about his anxieties. But also, jumping to conclusions is something that we see Ayumu doing throughout the first two seasons and substories as well. These two are constantly getting into arguments because of miscommunication, particularly in substories (the ones that come to mind the most are Temptation Lingerie, 夏、ほてりが冷めるまで and Surprise Date Love Story). But luckily, we know that things always work out because he’s just so in love with her haha and because she’s so unwavering in her love for him~

Naru is formidable. I really think the second half of Ayumu’s S3 is going to be one of the most intense routes in the entire game because he is a direct nemesis who just seems like an anarchistic edgelord, not a whole terrorist group or organisation that has a goal wider than just chaos. He’s clever and crafty, and I believe his hacking skills will be at least on par with Ayumu’s (i.e. I think Ayumu will find it challenging to go against him technically). I think he will be furious that someone of Ayumu’s talent has been coopted by Public Safety, of all people, and he will do anything he can to get his ‘friend’ back with him, perhaps employing the same types of taunting and tempting techniques that he used in this Episode 0.

What will separate the two will be what Ayumu will do for, and with, his MC. The one key point that Naru was missing the first time was that Ayumu’s decisions were ultimately swayed by Sachi, because you know he would have exploited that weakness if he had known. And I believe he will miss that point again this time when he tries to take Ayumu back. He already knows that Ayumu cares for his MC but what he won’t realise that Ayumu’s love can strengthen him now; it’s not a weakness. Plus, Ayumu has already demonstrated, and is now even more explicit about, how far he is willing to go to help her. Also, if he has to battle Naru, he won’t be doing it alone. He has the love of his life, who he personally trained into a specialist, fighting alongside him.

Anyway, that’s enough speculating from me. I don’t have the energy at the moment to articulate in detail about the ways in which Ayumu and his MC love each other, but I’m sure it’s obvious to all of you who have read his routes and fallen in love with him. I just want to mention some things that I loved about this route.

The great thing about every Episode 0 route is that all of the characters are still extremely flawed even at the end, which allows us to get a good sense of how they got from point A (life before PS) to point B (joining PS), and then how that then brings them to point C (meeting and falling in love with you). I mentioned before that joining Public Safety is still not really Ayumu’s own choice. This is because he’s still madly in love with Sachi, and his choice is still at least partially because of her words, although also because of all his mistakes. Also, speaking of mistakes, man does Ayumu make a whole lot of them here.

I really enjoyed seeing him get thrown into a position where he suddenly becomes startingly aware of his relatively privileged life, which also contributes to his sense of ennui btw, and become forced to question huge questions about life, death and morality. Considering all this happens in about 5 years and he presumably spent a couple years at the Police Academy before entering Public Safety, it made me realise that Ayumu learned and matured really quickly. The Ayumu we know now is so much more experienced that it was really fun seeing him basically just be a dumb kid who think he’s so great getting caught up in something bigger than he could have ever imagined. The bombing issue is Ayumu learning what being truly powerless really means. Choosing between life in IT or life in the police becomes a non-issue when he suddenly gets given a day to figure out what to do with his stolen information.

Also, can we just talk about Kaga’s kindness? You guys know how much I love Team Kaga dynamics, and I kind of love that we get to see that their dynamics are basically like this from the start, with Ayumu basically being a brat to Hyogo-san and then Kaga kind of begrudgingly adopting him and going out of his way to recruit him. We love bratty Ayumu but thinking back now, I also love how obedient he is to Kaga and how much they trust each other despite their first ever interaction being Kaga beating Ayumu in a dark alley lmaooo. But the thing that is the most telling to me about Kaga is the fact that we now know that Shinonome was involved in the deaths of Hamaguchi and co., i.e. the very thing that made Kaga choose to transfer to Public Safety. So like Goto and Soma, Kaga and Shinonome play a role in bringing each other to Public Safety. You can tell the writers consulted either a show bible or Kaga’s Ep 0 because the dialogue at the press conference is almost exactly the same in both routes haha. Anyway, Ayumu got tricked into stealing files that Naru deleted from the NPA database regarding the bomb threat case that Kaga was working on. It was Ayumu’s tip to all the reporters and Kaga that led to Kaga sending Hamaguchi and the rest of his squad to the abandoned building where they lost their lives. I mean, obviously, as Namba says, the fault lies with the terrorists (and then with NARU!!!, and of course with the higher ups who just buried the case) but Kaga knows that the case information that Shinonome helped Naru steal was crucial to this case, and yet not only does he not blame Ayumu, he actually goes out of his way to recruit him. I love how Kaga-style it is as well to say “I’m gonna have you in the end anyway. You may as well come quietly. Say yes and then think about it after.”

(This is almost a Prince Joshua level “yes or yes” proposal)

By the way, I also want to bring attention to this one moment in particular where Kaga’s expression SOFTENS when he sees Hamaguchi… Kaga cares about the people around him so much ;~~;

Anyway, I’m gonna wrap it up now because I will literally keep on going and never stop and I’m already about about 4000 words so I’m just gonna add a few more of my notes:

No wonder Namba still treats him as a kid cause he met bratty 20 year old Ayumu

By the way, how great was Namba’s advice? “Whatever you choose, I only hope that it’s to help others and not for your own amusement”

This is another defining difference between Ayumu’s (current) and Naru’s mentalities which I didn’t want to get into cause I had a slightly different focus.

I said this before but I’ll say it again: Ayumu’s parents encouraging him to follow his path and do what he wants to do even though it means that their business will no longer be a family business…. Gives me Emotions

“The shittingest”

Why did Ayumu get the nice giant dorm room that MC gets at police academy when Kaga and Ishigami had to share one room lol

And Goto and Subaru had to share a room too even when they were working detectives in Criminal Affairs

Ayumu calls Kaga yakuza no less thanTHREE TIMES lol

I know that this has been mentioned by Sachi before but this route really hit home for me that the bullying way he treats his MC is like... what he does when he’s happy?! He was so depressed and disillusioned this whole route that we got none of that behaviour and it made me really miss it

By the way, I’m like 90% certain that Suo is going to make an appearance somehow in Ayumu’s Love’s Trial route

TSUKUNO AYUMU!!!!!!!!!!

Also, I wish they gave us a little more introspection on Ayumu’s relationship with MC at the but also what a typical scene between the two of them we get to see! (Her being a dorky, clingy girl and him grousing but actually ENJOYING IT like the tsundere he is)

Do you agree/disagree with my thoughts? Let me know what you thought of, and enjoyed about, the route and my notes on it! 

[makersclark]

WandaVision Closes with a Heavy Sigh and Little Payoff

WandaVision turned into the worst kind of disappointing, for me, which is when a piece starts feeling lazy, or as if the creators gave up after a while. The equivalent of constructing a lovely diorama and then throwing it all onto the floor.

Except that's not quite right, because that would at least be an engaging and potent choice, rather than the staid beats and half-hearted reveals we get. The other element that makes it disappointing, of course, is that there's so much operating at a high level in the program. A wonderful cast, a brilliant design aesthetic that leaves room for an enormous amount of play. They had a great hook and kept balanced on the cusp of something really engaging, only to fall back on old tricks that just don't do the job.

It's difficult to get past, to start, how half of the characters have incoherent motivations or no motivations at all. Is Hayward really going to be arrested...for doing his job? How about what's going to happen to Monica and Jimmy for assaulting some of their peers? Darcy nearly kills Hayward, so that seems like it should levy some pretty serious consequences. But nope! It's dream logic, predicated on both the creators not caring enough nor thinking the audience is capable of thinking beyond any given moment of what is happening (Note: this is a terrible idea anyway, but particularly in a regards to something constructed for the Marvel Cinematic Universe, which people love to pick apart). There's an enormous amount of assumed empathy on the part of the script. The creators want the audience to root for Darcy, Jimmy, and Monica because they are the supporting cast, not because their characters have done (or even end up doing!) anything to earn that support.

The construction and execution of the storylines for everyone outside of the Hex were some of the most shockingly shoddy writing in the MCU to date. So much so that despite the entire show feeling, to it's detriment, like a backdoor pilot for Monica, her storyline feels begrudgingly tacked on. The show continually insists that Monica is right and righteous about everything going on, and that Hayward is somehow nefarious and up to no good, except very little happens that reinforces this. Monica is wrong about everything, basically. She's wrong that Wanda isn't to blame for the Hex, and she's even wrong that the children are real. And when she finally gets back into the Hex under her own power to try and stop/help Wanda, she fails at that, too. If she were entirely excised from the show then the events would hardly be different whatsoever, which is about the most damning thing you can say about a character and storyline that takes up the amount of screentime she does.

One of the biggest issues for MCU films to date has been their predilection for telling instead of showing us character moments and stories. In WandaVision, we're told a handful of times that Monica is grieving her mother, which gives her insight to the grieving Wanda, but this is so rarely backed up by the actual filmmaking on display that it's easy to forget it's even supposed to be the essential ingredient for her character and for her purpose in the story.

Meanwhile, Agatha Harkness (the wonderful Kathryn Hahn, who gets wasted in these last few episodes with some unfortunately typical MCU villain business) being revealed as a movie-of-the-week villain who wants more power is about the most boring interpretation of the character I can think of. And it's hard to even parse what the purpose of the Ralph/Fake Pietro reveal is (and then two entire scenes of him interacting pointlessly with Monica), since it's equally unsatisfying and incoherent. The casting of Evan Peters is a delightful red herring, so much so that it's real-world insinuations undercut whatever it could possibly have been revealed to be on the show. Agatha used a charm, I suppose, to give him powers and also used the somehow public knowledge of the Sokovia event to give him passing knowledge of Pietro's life? But what was in it for him? And was he the person in Witness Protection that Jimmy mentioned way back in Episode 4? It probably doesn't matter, which is fine, of course, except that the show sprinkles nuggets like this throughout production that never amount to anything. Another example: Who was the aerospace engineer who helped Monica out, and was given several eyebrow raising mentions? Guess it doesn't matter all that much! Which means all that emphasis and build-up was wasted time.

To the larger endgame plot, that Agatha is not manipulating Wanda for some further end, like to help corral her abilities with some tough love, or that she's working for a sinister master like Nightmare or Mephisto, is shocking. The show is clearly invested in setting up further stories and tying into the larger MCU in other ways, but it's trepidation about committing to a larger story within itself an immense let-down. We're told that WandaVision was supposed to lead directly into Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Madness, and yet the good Doctor doesn't show up. He's not even mentioned!*

A lot of these criticisms fall into the realm of nit-picking for me, but they are indicative of the overwhelming problem I mentioned at the beginning: there's an air of laziness to the whole affair. It's as if they came up with the beginning and trusted it would all sort itself out, or went with the first idea that popped into their heads.

It's not all bad, I should say. The Vision on Vision combat is some of the best in the MCU to date, and that Vision ends up out-smarting himself with logic puzzles and empathy rather than violence is the kind of cleverness I root for in comics. Paul Bettany, the cheeky bugger, told press that he had a scene with someone he's been "waiting to work with his whole life" who ended up being, of course, himself. Wonderful stuff.

I felt very cool about the MCU after finishing Endgame, honestly. It felt like the whole affair had reached it's point of diminishing returns, where anything going forward wasn't going to satisfy or delight me the way so many of the Phase 1-3 films had. Then the first episode of WandaVision knocked me over. It was surprising, precise, tightly done and with a very particular and specific notion of what it was about. The intimate setting, clever application of powers, and low-stakes were just what the doctor ordered after the universe-shattering events of the last several movies.

But the beast must be fed, it appears. The beast here being what filmmakers seem to think general audiences want and only want from their stories: The same thing, time and again. I said this after Episode 4:

[...]if there was one thing I was looking forward to with it's new horizons on D+ with it's TV shows, it was that the creators would have more freedom to remove themselves from the trappings of contemporary blockbuster writing. This episode is an indication that rather than removing themselves from those trappings, they're actually just exacerbating them to an egregious degree.

Unfortunately, Episode 4 turned out to be a tone-setter even moreso than the pilot, as the rest of the series slowly trudged towards the finish line and into the same failings that made that episode feel so slapdash and unsatisfying. WandaVision ends up being a disappointing finish to Marvel Studio's TV beginnings.

*The Sorcerer Supreme gets a mention, but that was just in reference to the position, not Strange in particular

[holylulusworld]

I don’t like you but stay

Summary: James ‘Bucky’ Barnes is the newest addition to the Avengers. Trying to help his friend settle in Steve asks his friend and the teams moral support to help him with unknown consequences.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader, Steve x Reader (platonic), Sam Wilson, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner, Wanda Maximoff

Warnings: angst, language, Bucky being a douche, arguments, fights, violence, angry Bucky, tension, possessive Bucky

Takes place after Endgame. Everyone is happy and alive. No one got hurt...

“You could at least try, Buck.” Steve tries once again.

“They don’t like me and I’m not a team player…not for a long time.”

“But Sam helped us back then, just like Wanda and Clint. We fought together against Thanos, it’s only one dinner. Come with me and eat with the team. Y/N will be there too. You know, my best friend.”

“A doll is your best friend now, huh?”

“She’s not a doll, more like our moral support. Y/N listens to us after a hard mission or if we have problems.”

“A goddamn psychologist or more therapist? No way I let her rummaging in my brain. I’ve got enough of people trying to trick my mind or manipulate me, Stevie.”

“Buck, calm down. She doesn’t want to manipulate you in any way. She’s a friend and I want you to visit her once a week. That’s an order Sergeant.” Steve says full Captain now.

“Fine, Captain. But I will not talk to that woman.”

“Then go to her and just sit in her chair but you will visit her.”

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

----

“How is Steve’s friend?” You ask.

“Unfriendly.” Nat chuckles. “Ruined my bikini figure by shooting me.”

“That was years ago, and he wasn’t himself.” Bruce throws in.

“Says the guy with the temper problems.” Sam chuckles.

“Guys, I wanted to know how he is now. Not his time during the Hydra crap. It’s awful this happened to him.”

“Honestly we do not know much about him, except he’s a great fighter and Cap’s friend. I mean he’s not hanging out with us at all. Always stays in his room or trains with Cap.” Sam says, and you nod.

“Thought so. That’s the reason Steve asked me for advice. Jesus this will be a hard piece of work.”

“He’s not a bad man. I could read his emotions and he’s torn and hurt.” Wanda says.

“I guess so. After all, he’s been through. I mean being a puppet to someone must be awful. Waking up and everything you know and love is gone is the worst.” You whisper. Lost in thoughts you barely recognize the man standing behind your back.

“The puppet just arrived.” Bucky spats and you sigh.

“Be nice, Buck,” Steve warns.

“Why? She called me a puppet.”

“I said that being a puppet must’ve been awful. I showed compassion.” You say turning around to face Steve’s friend.

Angry blue eyes stare back at you. You never saw more beautiful eyes at a man. Steve has blue eyes too, but this man is beating him without any effort. The soft brown hair frames his handsome face and you can’t stop looking at his lips.

“Got nothing else to justify your speech?” Bucky mutters.

“Hell, I didn’t hold a speech. I…forget it. I’m sorry if you got it wrong. I was just asking how you are doing. Hi, I’m Y/N, a friend of Steve.”

“A therapist without any compassion.” The blue-eyed man snaps at you and anger is boiling up inside of you. Seeing you rolling your shoulders and your body go stiff Steve plants a hand on your shoulder.

“Just breathe…he didn’t mean it that way. You know you can’t…not yet.” Steve says and you narrow your eyes.

“Fine by me, let’s eat then. Wanda and I cooked for all of you. Including our new member.” You say and Bucky scoffs.

“Won’t eat a bite of anything that doll cooked.”

“Then starve to death, Jamesy.” You chuckle.

----

Around one week later…first appointment…

“Why is there no chair or stuff…only a couch?”

“I like to get comfortable while talking to people. I’m not your therapist. We are not in my office this is my room. I invited you to talk to me, but you don’t have to. There are books and newspapers.” You say to lighten the mood.

“I won’t talk to you doll, no matter which kind of trick you will use.”

“I will not force you to anything, James. If you just want to sit over there it’s fine by me. I’ll answer some emails and stuff then.” You say opening your laptop. Seeing you and Steve as your wallpaper Bucky narrows his eyes.

“Are you fucking Stevie?” He mutters.

“Steve and I are only friends. There’s no physical attraction between us.”

“Lesbian or blind?”

“Huh?”

“Have you seen Steve? He’s Captain America.”

“I know that Steve is very attractive and most of the woman want a physical relationship with him too, but like Wanda and Nat, I’m not into him that way. We are friends since he came back. I helped him find a way to live in this for him new world. I would never risk our friendship for sex.”

“So, you would fuck him?”

“I do not like the word fuck…James. I’m not someone who has one-night stands.”

“Prude then?” He asks again.

“Neither prude nor a whore. Are we done talking about me and my sex life? Steve and I are friends. He’s into someone else, by the way, so if you want to talk about something start with your life.” You grunt.

“I like sex, I’m not prude.” James chuckles and you roll your eyes.

“Yeah. I get it.”

----

“Anything? Did he open up?” Steve asks.

“If you mean asking me about you and me and if we fuck, then yes, Steve. He opened up.” You mutter.

“Seriously? He asked if we…uh.”

“I told him we do not have sex. Don’t worry. Also, I told him I don’t like the word fuck.”

“Same.” Your friend stammers shaking his head. “Why did he ask you?”

“Saw the wallpaper on my laptop.”

“I see.”

----

Three weeks, James. If you do not want to talk about anything it’s fine by me. I’ll call Steve and tell him you are…whatever.” You groan while Bucky continues throwing knives at your books.

“Can you stop this? These books are rare. First editions. Stop ruining my books.” You yell now and Bucky starts grinning.

“That so? Do not look rare to me. Just old paper, doll.”

“If you throw one more knife at my books I’ll call Steve right now and tell him you can not attend any mission for the next months. How does that sound to you Bucky?” You mutter and he narrows his eyes. Searching your face, he licks his lips and throws a knife into the nearby wall.

“What the fuck!” You yell.

“Ah, you said fuck, doll.” Bucky teases and you want to strangle him.

“You threw a knife into my wall, you idiot! I can’t believe I promised Steve to help you. What a waste of time and energy. Could have good sex right now instead I’m trapped in this nightmare.” You groan falling onto the couch.

“Good sex? You…seriously.”

“As if you would know how to satisfy a woman.”

“I know how to fuck a girl to make her scream, doll!”

“Sure. That’s the reason you are hiding in your room since you came here. Just like in Wakanda you stay to yourself. No visitors or friends come around. You are one poor and lonely boy trying to get Steve’s attention.”

“I don’t need to listen to your stupid babbling,” Bucky yells storming out of the office.

“Finally, a reaction. I can work with that.” You say to yourself.

----

“How long do I have to come here.” He groans after two minutes.

“Until Steve says otherwise, or we killed each other.” You retort too tired to fight today.

Closing your eyes, you try to ignore the man staring at you. You can’t see it, but his blue eyes are searching your face.

“Why are you so silent today?”

“None of your concern.” You sigh.

“Tell me and I’ll tell you something too.”

“I do not trust you.”

“Pinky promise.”

“Fine, I was seeing this guy for some weeks. We had a few dates and I started liking him.”

“Was the sex bad?”

“Dunno. We didn’t have sex so far. I was busy with my job, the Avengers…you. I haven’t seen him for two weeks, so I called him and he acted like he’s busy. What he didn’t know was that I was in front of his house. I wanted to surprise him and then…”

“Then what doll? Don’t hook me on a story and don’t continue it.” Bucky mutters.

“I saw him with the waitress of the restaurant we were eating at during our last date. He almost choked on her tongue. Grabbed her ass and more.”

“So, he had fun. What’s the problem?”

“Only a guy can ask you something like that. I started liking him. If a woman does like you she imagines things…a future with you. We don’t see just a potential sex partner. We see marriage, children, a home…”

“Sex?”

“Yeah, dammit, Barnes, sex too. But first of all, I thought he likes me but obviously, he did not. He was just another asshole trying to get in my pants. Satisfied?”

“Hmm…” Angrily clenching his jaw Bucky decides to pay your friend a visit.

“Will you tell me something now?” You ask.

“I ate pancakes and strawberries for breakfast.” Bucky chuckles and your eyes widen.

“I can’t believe I opened up to you only for you to make fun of me.” You yell. This time you are the one storming out of the room.

----

“This won’t work Steve. I’m trying to make him open up for six months now and honestly, I’m done. He’s making fun of me. Lies…”

“Lies?” Steve asks.

“He made a pinky promise if I tell him something personal he will do so too. I told him, but he didn’t keep his promise. Told me what he ate for breakfast. I’m done, Steve. Let him go on missions or not. I really don’t care. You know him better than I do…I just can’t do this any longer. I’m sorry for letting you down.” You sigh.

Moving his arms around you Steve gently plants a kiss to your hair. What you both can’t see is the angry look on Bucky’s face and the jealousy welling up his stomach.

----

The next sessions Bucky never shows up, so you decide to tell Steve you did your best. After the little breakdown, you promised to give his friend another chance but obviously, he doesn’t want it.

Leaving the room to finally meet up with Nat to go on a shopping trip you bump into Bruce staring at you with wide eyes.

“You okay? Do you need my help, Bruce?”

“I think James needs your help. His hand is bloody, and he doesn’t want to tell me why he’s injured. Looks like he hit someone, but he refuses to talk to me.”

“Okay. Calm down, breathe.”

“I’m not going to ‘hulk around’ right now. I’m just worried about Steve’s friend. I would’ve asked Cap but he’s away.”

“On a mission with Tony and Clint, I know. Let’s go then.”

----

“Will you tell me why your hand is bloody and your knuckles almost broken?” You ask.

“…”

Sighing you shake your head. He even refused to let anyone clean the wounds.

“Listen I know you don’t like me.”

Not answering Bucky stares at the wall beind you.

“Dammit, you are so frustrating. Steve had to soothe me after our last session. Cap had to hug me to calm me down, idiot!” You mutter and Bucky’s face lits up.

“I had to hit someone.” He mumbles finally letting you clean the wound.

“Why? Was someone else in danger?”

“He hurt a woman and I had to defend her.”

“Oh, then it was justified, I guess.” You say gently putting some sanitizer onto his wounds.

“Hmmm…I’m sorry I did not come to our session. I had to take care of that guy first.”

“It’s okay. I can throw knives at my books on my own.” You tease and he smiles at you for a moment.

“I can do this for you. Bet you can’t even hit the right target.”

“Maybe…or maybe I’m a master…”

----

“He did what?” You gasp.

“I’m sorry to tell you but it seems like Bucky beat your friend into a pulp,” Sam says.

“Why should he do such a thing? I never even told him anything about Matthew. God, did his wife see this? Was she there too?”

“No, luckily we came just in time and thanks to Starks technology we could fix what Bucky broke. Why is he going after your friends?”

“I think he hates me and tries to hurt me that way, Sam. This ends now. No matter what Steve told me I will make Bucky pay for this. Friend of Steve or not I will mop the floor with the Winter Soldier right now.” You yell storming toward the training hall.

Bursting through the door you see Bucky’s surprised face a smile on his lips he walks toward you but the moment he approachs you he feels his body gets slammed into the nearby wall.

“You think you can do this and believe I will not hurt you!” You yell.

“I got no clue what you are talking about.”

“No clue? You almost killed my friend!”

“A worthless piece of shit!” Bucky talks back.

Using your powers, you slam him into the ceiling and then down on the floor. Groaning in pain he can see you start feeling dizzy. Steve was right. It’s too soon to use your powers again.

“I swear I will break your neck stupid bitch!” Bucky yells.

“Do it! Steve will be very happy after you killed his best friend, asshole!”

“I’m his best friend!”

“Forget it! You tried to kill him, you psychopath. Crazy piece of a man, not even able to control his emotions. I’m done…I’m just done with trying to help you for Steve’s sake. Fuck you, Bucky Barnes. Go to hell or back to Hydra. I don’t care!” You yell and for the first time, Bucky flinches at your words.

Tears stream down your face and you need to brace yourself against a wall to not break down. Before you can react an impact next to you make you scream.

“You won’t just leave! I’m not done with you! I don’t like you…but stay…” Bucky pants removing his metal hand out of the wall.

“Why? You tried to kill my friend! He never did anything wrong. His pregnant wife was in his house. Would you have attacked her too?” You sniff and his eyes widen.

“Wife? You said he cheated on you with a waitress.” Bucky gasps.

“Waitress? I don’t…wait…did you believe Matthew was the one cheating on me?”

“Yeah…he was not?”

“No, Matthew is my cousin's husband. One of my best friends since college.”

“God…then I was wrong. I wanted to punish him for hurting you…”

“Why would you do that?” You ask feeling even dizzier.

“I…”

“I think I need to sit down…” You whisper.

Scooping you into his arms Bucky picks you up to run with you toward Bruce’s lab. Someone has to help him...

----

“You see she’s like Wanda but at the same time different. Using her powers means using life energy. She drains her own energy out to perform her powers. I told her she’s too weak by now. The fight with Thanos got her good. Y/N was defending Vision with Wanda and almost died.” Steve explains looking at your unconscious form.

“She’s an Avenger too?” Bucky asks.

“Kinda…more into defending an injured team member and stuff. She uses a shield to protect us if needed. Y/N barely attacks. It’s just not her style.”

“But she attacked me…really good. A hell of a woman.” Bucky says.

“Ask her out, Buck. Man up and tell her how you feel. Watching you pining is kinda sad.” Steve says knocking Bucky on his shoulder.

----

“Hey, doll. Don’t move too much. You really shouldn’t have attacked me.” Bucky says gently holding your hand.

“What happened?”

“You were unconscious and I brought you to Bruce.”

“Oh, Steve was right. I wasn’t ready to use my powers yet.”

“I’m sorry for hurting your friend. I was wrong…uh…I just tried to punish that guy.”

“You don’t have to punish anyone for me, James.”

“But I want to…I don’t like you but…stay. Please stay with me. Don’t leave me too.” Bucky says kissing your hand softly.

“Bucky?”

“I want…I need…I like you. Would you go out with me?”

“Seriously?”

“You don’t want to?” He sighs.

“I mean you need six months to ask me out? Do you need that long to get me into your bed too?”

Eyes darkened Bucky grins down at you. Covering your body with his he presses you into the mattress.

“No.” He rasps before kissing you breathless.

“Fuck. I like you too…but you will have to tell Steve you stole his best friends heart.” You tease.

“I’m his best friend and he knows you stole mine.” Bucky retorts.

“That’s not true! I’m his best friend.”

“Woman don’t make me mad! I don’t like you but I will make you stay…and I’m Stevie’s best friend.”

“In your dreams…now kiss me again and we ask Steve.”

“Those are the most useful words ever leaving your lips, doll,” Bucky mutters claiming your lips once again.

----

“Fucking finally,” Nat groans dragging Steve out of your room.

“They were fighting over me.”

“No, they are fighting to turn each other on. You really don’t want to see what happens next.” Nat chuckles when you and Bucky start moaning.

“I guess you are right. I like them both but I will not stay…”

[castiels-angel-friend-blog]

Prompts: Prodigal Son

Prompt 40:

"It's been six years!"

------------------------------------------------------------

Malcolm wasn't quite sure how he got in this situation, yet here he was getting yelled at by his mom while Ainsley and their father watched, an odd glint in Martin's eye. He knew why his mother was angry, he just didn't know why his secret had to come out the one time he couldn't physically escape the conversation.

Ainsley always joked about his ability to escape talking about something he didn't want to. She said he was a master at being an escape artist and always brought up the time he actually jumped out a car to avoid their mother. Jessica was never pleased when she did, so Ainsley made a point to bring it up at least once a month during their family dinners.

But now he was trapped in a cell with his family. He fully blamed Ainsley for his predicament.

******************************

He went with Ainsley to visit their father, after she batted her eyes up at him with a sweet smile. And he was weak, so he said yes to his baby sister and went. Jessica stormed in half way through and demanded they both leave. That, of course, led to Ainsley arguing with her. Malcolm tried to calm them while Martin subtly egged them on. Malcolm then tried to dissuade his father and left the women to shout as he dad then began to use his psychological warfare on him. At least he stopped antagonizing Jessica and Ainsley.

It took a while but eventually the women calmed down and began to come to an agreement. So naturally that's when the alarm began blaring. Everyone's heads snapped around as the guard began shouting.

"Stay inside. We've had a containment breach!" He told them before rushing down the hall.

"Wha-" Ainsley muttered, confused and frightened.

"A patient escaped." Malcolm clarified, gently directing her and Jessica away from the door. It still stood open from when Jessica whirled in like a tornado. They let him, not realizing he was angling himself between them and the door. He had itched to shut it but thought that being trapped with Martin might be worse. He hoped the prisoner was captured soon.

It didn't take long for another argument to start, this time between Malcolm and Jessica. He wasn't even sure what started it, only that it got heated fast. Ainsley tried to step in but Jessica kept steamrolling over her.

"-never listen to me, Malcolm. All I've ever wanted was you safe but-"

"Yes, I know, " he rolled his eyes to the ceiling, an air of mocking in his tone. "You don't need me to love you. You just need me alive." Ainsley winced while Martin watched in amusement.

"Malcol-" Jessica cut Ainsley off again, eyes blazing.

"I am your mother, Malcolm and you need to respect me as such." Her teeth were gritted in anger, mouth pursed.

Malcolm stared at her for a long moment before sighing. He was frustrated with the conversation and how she never stopped pushing about everything.

"I do respect you." He replied, ignoring Jessica's huff of disbelief. "I give you as much respect as you give us." Jessica faltered at that, her brows furrowing in confusion.

"I'm afraid I don't know what you mean." She said stiffly. Malcolm gave her a faux smile and gestured to his sister.

"It means Ainsley has been trying to talk for the last ten minutes and you have not once let her speak." Jessica looked to Ainsley who stared at Malcolm with a slight hint of awe in her gaze. The alarms cut off, the room falling into an eerie silence. It only lasted a moment before Ainsley spoke up.

"Yes," Ainsley said, turning to her mother, eyes filled with determination. "You are always telling us what to do and how to live our lives but if it doesn't fit the idea you have for us it means nothing. You are always pushing us to be the picture perfect family but news flash Mom, we're not perfect!" She was just as frustrated as Malcolm and was letting it all out. Jessica listened in stunned silence.

"You are constantly telling Malcolm how his job is terrible when he is out saving peoples lives! And you may not think that's great but it is and I'm really proud of him." She shot Malcolm a smile he returned easily. "My job is great too and you want to know why? I get to be a voice for people when they can't speak. I am always there to tell the truth because people deserve to know it! But you can't see that because it's not what you want for us. And I'm sorry, but I'm not changing anything for you. And neither is Malcolm. Because we shouldn't have to. Us living our lives and doing what we love should be enough for you. Nothing we do is enough though is it?"

Malcolm took a step forward, worried as Ainsley's voice became thick with tears. She blinked rapidly, refusing to let them fall.

"And I know why now," she said, swiping angrily at her eyes. "I know why Malcolm is afraid to tell you about Grac-" she cut off, wide eyes turning to Malcolm, who stood frozen staring at her with a look of betrayal.

"Malcolm," she pleaded, eyes flooding with new tears that she let fall freely now. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!"

"Shh," Malcolm shushed her gently, pulling her into his arms. She clung to his jacket, face pressed to his chest. Malcolm spoke softly to her as she cried, sweet nothings that eased her quickly.

"I really am sorry." She whispered, looking up at him pitifully.

"I know. It's okay Ains. She had to find out eventually." Malcolm smiled softly down at her. She smiled sweetly back, eyes red rimmed.

"Find out what exactly?" Jessica's voice cut in. They both tensed before pulling away from each other. Ainsley slid her hand into Malcolm's. He squeezed it gently in thanks. She nudged his shoulder in solidarity, letting him know without words that she was with him. Through thick and thin, hell and high waters. And even in the face of a looming and intimidating Jessica Whitly.

******************************

That was how Malcolm broke the news. That he was a father to a beautiful baby girl. Who just happened to be six years old. Jessica was not happy and made it known.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me! I'm your mother Malcolm and her grandmother! Were you ever going to tell me? Or was I supposed to find out once you started making tuition payments?! Why did you wait so long?"

Malcolm wasn't sure what to say. "I don't know." He said honestly. "It just never seemed like the right time."

"The right time?"Jessica's brows rose, face stunned. "It's been six years!" Her voice cracked, so many emotions running through it.

Malcolm and Ainsley shared a look, hands still linked. They both turned back to see Jessica staring at them. Martin was too but had been staying oddly quiet. Malcolm didn't want to think why that was.

"Ainsley knew?" Jessica asked. Malcolm flinched at the hurt in her voice, at her eyes flickering sadly.

"Oh please," Ainsley scoffed. "I only found out because she came running into me when I dropped by a few weeks after he moved back. Now I know why he never wanted any visitors. He made me promise not to tell. And honestly, no one can say know to his doe eyes." Jessica looked to Malcolm who shot Ainsley a look.

"Well," Jessica said, smoothing imaginary wrinkles out of her dress. "I want to meet her. What is the girl's name?"

Malcolm glanced at Ainsley before answering. "Her name is Grace. Grace Bright."

"Bright?" A voice said. Everyone jumped, actually forgetting for a moment that Martin was still there. "You didn't give her the Whitly name?" It seemed like an innocent question but they could all see the anger simmering just beneath the surface. Jessica and Ainsley shifted closer to Malcolm, wanting to put a barrier between him and his father.

"Yes," Malcolm said, meeting Martin's eyes. "I gave her my name. I refuse to carry on the name Whitly." Martin's eyes narrowed and everything was tense. Suddenly, Martin beamed.

"Very well, my boy. If that is your decision. When can I meet my granddaughter?" His eyes were shining with a warmth that had been absent just a heartbeat before. It threw them all off, shocked at the sudden change.

"You-you want to meet her?" Malcolm asked, surprised. Only a second later he realized he really shouldn't be. Martin loved all of them, granted his love was selfish and possessive. But it was love nonetheless. So it only made sense he would love Grace. Malcolm didn't doubt the man already felt protective of the girl despite only knowing her name.

"Of course," Martin said, stepping forward. A smile crossed his face as none of them stepped back. "She's family."

All of them shuddered at the utter possessiveness in his voice. They looked at each other and silently swore to never let Martin Whitly near Grace. They wouldn't let him taint or mar Malcolm's little girl. He wouldn't ruin anyone else in their family. Not as long as Jessica, Ainsley and Malcolm worked together. They turned as one when the guard knocked on the open door.

"We're all clear." He told them. They nodded. Ainsley and Jessica nodded to Martin before leaving without a word.

Martin watched his son as Malcolm struggled with what he wanted to say.

"I'm not going to bring my daughter here." He finally said, rushing to finish before Martin could open his mouth to argue. "This isn't a place I want her to know exists. I'm going to let her grow up free of all of this. She will grow up free of the murders and manipulation. And free of you." Malcolm's eyes shone brightly when they met Martin's again.

"She will never know you." With that last statement, Malcolm turned and strode out of the cell. He ignored Martin's calls for him as the guard shut the door behind him. He smiled at his mother and sister, waiting for him at the end of the hall. They smiled back and each took one of his arms. They left together, still smiling.

Martin watched them go and felt a sense of deep anger stir in his gut. He would get them to come back to him. One way or another, no matter what it took. After all, they were family. And nothing stood in the way of family. Absolutely nothing.

[toxicfucksaround]

Big ass art dumb, scroll through at own risk

Hello guys! It has been absouletly forever since the last time I posted anything here, I’m sorry. I kinda forgot I had a tumblr for awhile. But I’m back, with a whole new, much, much better artstyle compared to before.

So, in honor of this, I decided to start posting again, starting with an unbearably long art dump going from oldest to newest art on this computer so, scroll at you’re own risk.

Here is my first attempt at Pixel art in awhile, my girl Zoey when she was younger and being bullied or something.

Next is art of Marina and Mark, her awful ex, brought to you by the song Show and Tell by Melanie Martinez.

Next is my flower bab Mono, a skeleton who became the unwilling host of a parasitic like flower, which loooves sunflower seeds for some reason. The flower doesn’t hurt Mono, rather it protects him, as without a host, the flower will die.

Now meet Adelaide and Juniper, Mono’s moms. One is a stay at home mom that grows fruits and vegetables in their large backyard, and the other one is a flower scientist who studies all sorts of strange and gorgeous flowers, as well as experiments with them.

Meet Green Pearl, half of a permi-fusion based off a really pretty gem I saw, the Watermelon Tourmaline.

Meet Star Ruby, the other half of my Permi-fusion.

Next up is the fusion itself, Watermelon Tourmaline.

After that comes an OC I made named Matthew. He was made after I listened to Honey I’m Home too much and decided to make a character who’s a sweet christian trans boy who’s dad beats him because said dad is an asshole and an alcoholic.

Next two is a Hazbin Hotel OC before and after she died, who in life was a cannibalistic serial killer and in death became even worse. She’s not actually a vampire, I just remember reading somewhere that butterflies drink the blood of dead things and I thought it was cool.

Next up is Marina dressed in three outfits heavily inspired by the GHOST songs in this order; Apetite of a People Pleaser, Honey I’m Home, and Happy Days.

Next is a Blue Spinel OC I made, simply because the idea of entertainment gems is too fantastic to not make twenty versions of, come on. Besides, Spinel’s are great. This is my Blue Spinel, who’s gem is on her back like lapis. Her entertainment is mostly singing as well as a few smooth jokes.

After Blue Spinel is Liliac Spinel, one I plan to redesign in the future,I wanted to give her a more clowny apperance, and she acts a lot like the Spinel we got to know in the movie before Pink abandoned her, except that she can actually read social clues and knows when to calm down and give people a bit of space,

Next is my Blue Moonstone, and don’t worry I just recently redesigned her so, she looks better.

Next is criminal Marina and criminal Zoey, who I won’t get into right now but maybe I will later.

Next is Moth Zoey and Snake Marina, part of a mate au that I won’t get into right now but I will at a later time.

Next is my little Sally Face OC Tabitha, known affectionatly by her dad as Tabi Cat. Tabitha is... definetly one of my weirder OCs, as she’s obsessed with demons and ghosts, and actually isn’t scared of seeing demons or ghosts around the apartments. However, she is unbelievably angry at all the poor, innocent deaths that take place thanks to the cult, expressing her outrage often. She exists in two different timelines, one where she dies to the cult, and the other where she lives and through it and backs up Sal in court, effectively keeping him out of jail.

Next is a fursona I made. I’m not a furry, I just thought it would be fun to draw, although there is nothing wrong with furries anyways but whatever, here’s Mouse! Inky.

Here is the Moonstone redesign I promised. Now, when it comes to Moonstones in Steven Universe, we really don’t know anything about them. But I like to think that they are rather high up gems, by more of a theory then anything. See, you know the Moon Goddess statue that was supposed to save the Lunar Sea Spire? I like to think that the “Moon Goddess’s” are really just Moonstones, who are rather rare to come by but extremely valuable gems. Bismuth revealed that Spires are made for important gems to think in, and I believe that this particular spire was made for moonstones or other oceanic gems. As a ‘goddess’ like gem, she is calm, quiet, and wise, but very compassionate for others. My Blue Moonstone fled from homeworld during the rebellion, after hearing of a better place for gem kind, as well as their plan to protect the humans that occupied earth. Her Black and Gold Pearl, who belongs to my friend Luna, joined her. By the time they finally escaped to earth, the gem corruption had already taken place, and they were safe from it.

Next up is the Fell/Edgy version of Zoey, who is honestly one of my favorite versions of Zoey I’ve ever made.

This is Kelly, Marina’s youngest sibling and honestly the most mature out of the four. She’s 18, and rather sweet, does most of the cleaning and cooking at home because her siblings are all lazy shits, and she has a very good sense of judgement when it comes to people. However, she is very frail and spends a lot of time indoors to stay safe. She’s Asexual and straight, but supports her siblings even when they make her wanna gouge her own eyes out.

This is Aurora, the second youngest. She’s twenty one and currently working as at retail, having quit her stripper job the year before. She’s really into fashion, and wants to design her own line one day, for now she’s just making clothes for her siblings.

And Jonah, honestly I have mixed feelings about him. He’s a huge piece of shit, and I kinda hate him but I also love that he’s a dick, I don’t know why. He’s Marina’s twin brother, and the oldest of the four, and is just, very overprotective and mean to everyone.

This is Baby Doll, a Hazbin OC of mine that’s one of my favorites, personally. In the 1950s she was trapped and manipulated as the perfect housewife, bending over backwards to do everything her husband ever wanted. But about 5 months after she gave birth to his baby, he killed it while he was drunk, making it seem like it was an accident. Baby Doll was heartbroken, and blamed herself for the death, and was pushed over the edge when she returned from grocery shopping to find her husband cheating on her with a younger woman. She snapped, killing her husband and his mistress, before realizing what she did and killing herself.

Time to meet Coco, and boy he he one of my favorite Hazbin OCs. In life he was addicted to cocaine, and when offered a nice supply of it for sleeping with a drug dealer, who was he to refuse? So he totally slept with her, and the two made it a regular thing, getting closer to each other and falling in love. The got engaged, and that’s when things went to shit. The Drug dealer got into a drug war, and during said attacks, Coco was killed horribly. His fiance, distraught, gave up her life of crime and worked towards becoming a better persona, and later died, going to heaven since she had repented and become better. Coco himself had went to jail, and never got to see his fiance again.

[tillman]

hi i ranked every single dark souls 1 character by who i think is the most kissable . its 79 characters all with a description of why theyre at the place theyre at with images for reference :-) its all under cut for u to enjoy.. thank u

this is all my opinion cus hehe im making the list but also im god so this is fact now . 

counting down because u know what ! buildup is fun and i have to start off with everyones most favorite:

GWYN - 79

im kidding. fuck gwyn and everything he stands for. he wouldnt even be a good kisser he doesnt have FUCKING LIPS

SEATH - 78

oh you really wanna kiss the incel dragon who kidnaps ladies for his weird experiements?? yeah?? who are you, big hat logan?

EINGYI - 77

heres one i wont get hate for: this fucking asshole . die bastard . he cant even kiss his face is all infected and gross!

KAATHE - 76

he sucks.

SMOUGH - 75

not only is he too big to kiss! hes a cannibal!! hed eat you!!!! thats no kiss i want!

MANUS - 74

listen i know yall love daddies and all that but hes manipulative and not a nice person so id watch out. i GUESS hes kissable as he was a human before but def not a good kiss

BED OF CHAOS - 73

its just some vines that sometimes set on fire!! If it were still the witch of izalith she would be probally in the 20s as shes a good person who tried very hard to help the world but in this state... u cant even kiss her!

FRAMPT - 72

better than kaathe but the whole no lips and being a manipulative snake monster really throws me off and shoves him down at the bottom

FINA (GODDESS OF LOVE/BEAUTY (?)) - 71

(mentioned character - no image sorry :-( )

Listen as much as im all for love, this is love u dont want ! just trust me dont be lautrec dont do it you dont want to kiss fina listen to me. please dont kiss fina.

VINCE AND NICO - 70

way of the white members are NOTABLY unkissable but these guys. are just so boring. theyll be your white bread boyfriend as neil would say... bad kissers and bad people!

LAUTREC - 69 

aw fuck wait can i make another character 69 he doesnt deserve it. anyways not only is he not over his ex (fina) hed probally gut you and steal your lunch money half way through the kiss anyways so whats the point . thats not how u treat a lover idiot

CENTIPEDE DEMON - 68

it eats your face and you die. next pleaaase

PETRUS - 67

another way of the white cleric. he at least starts off nice and he says fuck rich people but also he let that happen to rhea and i fucking hate his guts so no.

PALADIN LEEROY - 66 

out of all the way of the white idiots hes the best in that he wears armor and seems cool but its the way of the white man.  i cant get past that. sorry leeroy at least your armor is cool. he probably hasnt kissed someone in hundreds of years anyways 

MOONLIGHT BUTTERFLY - 65

delicate ... but beautiful! i dunno how to smooch it but i def would if i could ! i dont think it can kiss back but, o well! we all have flaws

IRON GOLEM - 64

it cant kiss back but its COOL and can throw me like a javelin so like . yeehaw id smooch its little face place 

UNDEAD MERCHANTS (BOTH) - 63

between moss and yulia i think they got enough on their plates! plus since theyre so hollowed, i dont think they have any lips to kiss back with! 

INGWARD - 62

hes not like . bad persay but also i dont trust him after he helped with new londo. cool design tho. i wanna kiss that bird beak mask

JEREMIAH - 61

was a bullfrog, and never took off his crown long enough to kiss another person...... i feel like if he did though! oh boy!!!

Asylum Demon + Demon Firesage + Stray Demon - 60

more kissable than some bosses, but still not the greatest lips. good butts though on all of them.... so i guess thats fr u kinky people 

SNUGGLY THE CROW - 59

(no image shes a crow) 

please stop drawing her as an anime girl shes literally just a grow that likes warm things oh my god you freaks be nice to her

BIG HAT LOGAN - 58

hes hard to kiss around the hat! and on that note hes pretty much taken with his obsession with seath. good luck! hes nice though so better than most of this list so far

GAPING DRAGON - 57

ranked so high because past its giant underbelly of teeth and destruction is this very tiny head which i think is so funny i cant help but want to kiss its little snoot.... hehe baby

PRINCE RICARD - 56

oh now were actually getting into kissable range! ricard is a prince (maybe even of astora... kissability increase.) so his high ranking might get you some kissability points, but the hollowing is gonna lower that. 4/10 no kissable lips!

4 KINGS - 55

whats better than a prince..... a king... whats better than a king..................  4 KINGS! just watch out for their overly anime spiky armor and the fact their in a never ending void nightmare but they do have faces so thats points above the rest!

SALAMAN - 54

(mentioned character only! sorry!)

hmmmm we dont learn much about him other than he was close with quelana and he was ............ hot!  hes a pyromancer.  being of the great swamp pushes him down a bit because he prolly smells like his name sake but u know what ! maybe hes cute! we cant be sure! hes in the running at least!

TAURUS DEMON - 53

hmm... bad lover.... good kisser................................................... the things i do for big beefy demon love.

GOUGH - 52

While you cant kiss gough cus all the sap in his helmet i cant bare to put him lower than he is hes just so sweet. a kiss on his helmet because i love him so much

NITO - 51

while he cant kiss back, nito deserves a kiss or two! plus he has a lot of hands so u can hold his hands and be hugged at the same time and u know what that might be just as good as a nice kiss. good on you nito!

STONE DRAGON - 50

again a non kisser........ damn beaks! the stone dragon does need a kiss though. they havent seen another living soul in years down in ash lake! so im giving them points on that alone.

VAMOS - 49

like the last two.... no lips! vamos though makes up for it in his charm and wit, and his exceptional skill in smithing! so even without lips to kiss, you still should kiss vamos! hes a good friend

ARIAMIS - 48

(mentioned !)

wow... a painter! and a skilled one at that! this man created the painted world used to keep priscilla safe and that is so noble it gives him points right off the bat! i feel like though, as an artist, he might be a bit weird about it. so watch out and be safe, but in the end, get free art and some free smooches out of him!

ELIZABETH - 47

thats my mom ... of course she gets a good cheek smooch for all her hard work keeping dusk safe!

DOMHNALL - 46

i love domhnall hes a good guy whos trying his best but also his mask is so fucking goofy i dunno if i can do it .

RICKERT - 45

as much as i think rickert would be a good kiss (hes smart, cute, and skilled!) he is trapped behind some bars willingly and probably wont let you in. i can dream though!

CEASLESS DISCHARGE - 44

if theres any boss that NEEDS a kiss its him. poor dude lost all his family and was turned into this laughing stock of a creature. youd probably burn your lips but .... please just be nice to him :-(

SHIVAS BODYGUARD - 43

ooo a strong yet silent type.... hes even cute under his mask! good kiss, but i feel like he might just care more about his actual job than a kiss ! hes dedicated !

CIARAN - 42

putting aside me knowing shed be a good kisser, i just understand she probably doesnt want a kiss right now, shes grieving over the loss of her friend and i respect her comfort. maybe a good pat on the shoulder and a cup of nice tea with her would be nice though! 

PINWHEEL - 41

may seem like a weird choice to put a necromancer up so high on the list but.... honestly pinwheel needs some love. dude lost his whole family and in trying to revive them accidentally fused them to himself. while he might not be the best kisser, i honestly just wanna tell him everythings gonna be ok.

KIRK - 40

ok if you know me you KNOW how much it pains me to put kirk so low but. hes a busy guy! not only is he doing so much work to help out where he can with the fair lady, but you might just get pricked by his spiky armor while youre going in for the smooch! so, as much as he deserves a kiss for all his hard work, maybe pass until another time!

SIEGLINDE - 39

were getting there! she is just so strong... and so brave........ she may not even be undead! sieglinde is so strong and wonderful doing all that just to deliver a message to her unruly father, she deserves so many kisses! Shes got a lot on her plate though so please respect her......

BERENIKE - 38

(just mentioned!)

implied to be a huge strong knight who made it to even sens fortress! yes please ! 

BELL GARGOYLES - 37

hmmmmm,.......... if u can get past the whole lighting your face on fire, these are two loyal gargoyles! that seems pretty good to me!

BEATRICE - 36

a wonderful helpful witch friend! she is so nice to help you defeat flying bosses with her magic!! i love her so much! shes even cute to boot! 

GIANT BLACKSMITH - 35

HE HELP ANYTIME................... I HAVE TO GIVE HIM A KISS FOR ALL HIS HARD WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LEGALLY I HAVE TO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RHEA - 34

putting aside my hatred of the way of white.... rhea really is just a babey.... shes adorable and kind and just wants everyone to be ok so im won over. maybe a little forehead smooch for being such a good person!

OSCAR - 33

oh oscar. a noble, heroic, and cute knight but in the end. would he be a good kisser........ i feel yes, but maybe not so much so! hes busy focusing on being a hero you know! hes a good friend and i cant help but fall in love with nice guys

THE FAIR LADY - 32

she deserves the entire world and all i can give her is my humanity and a kiss........... sobs. i wish i could do more to ease her pain but she is so strong and wonderful! please give her a nice smooch! 

QUELANA - 31

i didnt wanna separate them ........ her wonderful sister! who even taught humans pyromancies! shes smart and nice, and honestly probably needs a kiss. 

MILDRED - 30

uh my notes from last night are just

so yeah! thats mildred!

CRESTFALLEN MERCHANT - 29

hes sad as fuck but also... kinda handsome! he was a knight of berenike and made it almost all of the way through sens fortress showing how skilled he is! a strong man like this (inspired by maybe the best kisser in demons souls, boirr) has to be a good kiss!

SIEGMEYER - 28

hes going through a lot right now but... how could u not think siegmeyer is kissable. thats on you man. thats your own character flaw.

OSWALD - 27

ok this might be slightly controversial but i feel like oswald would be a good kisser. if you got past his slightly weird love for velka who well get to (thats just carimites (carimians? carimfolk???)) hes nice and kind and maybe the funkiest character in dark souls

KALAMEET - 26

another cant kiss you but.... kalameet is just so cool ! very shadow the hedgehog and u know what that is NOT a bad thing. you might have a rough time trying to get there, but..... aww whos a good dragon.....

DARKMOON KNIGHTESS - 25

alright the final stretch! the darkmoon knightess is the anor londo firekeeper, and a friend of gwyndolin! shes supposed to be “ugly and shit” (real quote. i would never lie to you) but her model is so cute! defiantly kissable as fuck!

 SANCTUARY GUARDIAN - 24

GOFH ITS JUST A WIDDLE KITTEY CAT........... I GIVE IT A WIDDLE KISSEY ON ITS FOREHEAD AHOWHWWAWWW BABEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ALVINA - 23

AWHAHWAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW SHES H(FADOESAGVFOSDHFSO CUET EIFEDKC LKOFIE JS I LOVE YOU FJEADFIDASHCODEUFCUSFKSDHFKSUHFC

DUSK - 22

oh yes!! the princess of a lost land...... will you be her knight in shining armor.......... oh i just love her so much. shes sweet and nice and cute and deserves a kiss or two!! please be nice to my daughter!

SHIVA - 21

hottie with cool armor and a cooler sword. since they cut his whole sidequest i can with all certianty say YES he is super kissable and is probably a great kisser 

QUELAAG - 20

IGNORIGN HER GIANT SPIDER LOWERBODY........... SHES JUST DOING THIS FOR HER SISTER SHE JUST WANTS TO HELP HER POOR SISTER WHOS IN PAIN HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE HER SO MUCH!! PLEASE KISS QUELAAG! 

GRIGGS - 19

im putting griggs so high cus hes kissable in a factor unseen before...... baby factor. hes soft and nice and is just trying to find his dad! just tuck him into bed and kiss him goodnight! its what he deserves! 

ARTORIAS - 18

everyone already KNOWS why artorias is a good kisser. hes nice, strong, brave, and most importantly. cool as FUCKING HELL ! HE DOES SICK ANIME FLIPS!! if you can look past the abyss slowly taking him over, youll find a good good boy who deserves a good kiss.

ANASTACIA - 17

the good firekeeper who we spend most of our time with in 1! YES of COURSE Shes kissable. she deserves SO MANY kisses for all of her hard work in keeping the firekeep shrine lit! good job anastacia im sorry lautrec is like that

VELKA GODDESS OF SIN - 16

(just mentioned!)

if her title alone doesnt bring you in, youll be pleased to know shes implied to help watch over priscilla (who well get to hold your horses) and keep the poor girl safe! a strong sense of justice and a love of crows, shes probably an amazing kiss if you can find her! 

ANDRE - 15

were closing in on #1 and i just have to throw andre in here. hes so nice and strong! just . please kiss andre! he deserves some he does so much work! 

PRISCILLA - 14

poor priscilla. called a monstrous crossbreed and has to hide in a painted world to stay safe from those who would hurt her. including the internet! leave her alone you freaks shes not your fetish fuel!!! she deserves a good kiss on the cheek and a hug for all she has to put up with

 CRESTFALLEN WARRIOR - 13

its my list i get to put the crestfallen warrior where i want. and u know what? he would honestly be a good kiss. hes kind and helpful and never once wishes you harm, he just needs to be held tightly and kissed passionately and u know what. dont we all. 

GWYNEVERE - 12

she is beautiful but .... 1 shes married and 2 shes not even real! whatever. her husband the flame god flann is at least.......... hot! haahgdaefshdfcdhswfe im so fucking funny

BLACK IRON TARKUS - 11

listen i see a big beefy dude i go “hey thats hot please kiss me” so of course tarkus is this high up hes the beefiest dude around.... right?? anyways all knights of berenike are kissable hes just the MOST kissable of the 3 named ones!

ORNSTEIN - 10

this dude kisses the son of gwyn you KNOW hes a good kiss. the golden lion armor just helps so much. we love you ornstein .....

HAVEL THE ROCK - 9

HERE HE IS ... THE BEEFIEST GUY AROUND ... this bitch uses a DRAGONS TOOTH as a huge club to bash people with if that isnt big dick energy i dont know what is. armor made of stone. heart made of gold. havel the rock please god kiss me passionately under the moonlight .

SIF - 8

oghfoghfohg puppey..................................... SMOOCHIE THE PUPPY>...........

NAMELESS KING (!?) - 7

(hes just mentioned in ds1!!) 

I KNOW HES A DS3 BOSS BUT LISTEN TO ME THEY TALK ABOUT HIM SO MUCH IM ALLOWING THIS.  he defected from his awful dads team to go help the DRAGONS!! thats so cool hes so kissable. would be more kissable if he wasnt kissing ornstein but thats ok . i respect them both.

MARVELOUS CHESTER - 6

this MAY just because i have a huge crush on him but also here are some good kissable things about him: his fasion, his voice that sounds like a purr, his laugh, his malice, his funny mask, him. thank you for your time.

GWYNDOLIN - 5

FINAL FIVE! heres gwyndolin. the most kissable of all of gwyns children for the sheer fact of how much work they put in to making sure people stay safe and happy. they are so kind and wonderful they deserve SO MANY kisses! good on you gwyndolin....

LAURENTIUS - 4

now heres a fun one! laurentius is one of the nicest guys u will EVER meet in any souls game. he genuinely cares about you, he loves and respects u even if u dont respect him or his skills, hes nice cute and above all: i love him . please kiss laurentius he is a nice guy who just wants the best for u..... dont be mean to him.....................

CAPRA DEMON - 3

the highest one that cant kiss back and thats for the capra demons SHEER HORNY ENERGIES. this is a demon you can fuck! thats it i have nothing else to say i just think the capra demon is funny

SOLAIRE - 2

do i seriously have to explain why solaire is so high up. not only is he nice and cares about you, hes handsome, passionate, and just a good fucking person. he is hands down one of the most kissable characters in any souls game ever! fuck yeah! go off you funky little lover boy! 

and finally.

its patches.

[carmenlire]

The Son’s to Bear

read on ao3

With a wave of his hand, a viewing window opens on the wall, allowing Asmodeus to watch his son unobtrusive.

He sees matted hair, greasy and unkempt. There are circles under his eyes, dark bruising that betrays his bone-deep exhaustion. Laying limp in his bed-- with its Egyptian cotton and hand-woven duvet-- Magnus looks broken.

It’s a sight for sore eyes and Asmodeus drinks the scene in hungrily.

He’d tried. Lilith knew that he’d tried his damnedest to mold Magnus into the man-- the king-- he was born to be. He’d known from the moment his son was born, wails echoing around the little village he’d slipped through several months earlier-- that this would be his heir. None of his other children had ever been so powerful from the start. From Edom, Asmodeus could feel the strength in the babe, the magic already so bold and strong.

When he’d visited the little house on the outskirts of the village, he’d crept through the house as silent as a shadow. He’d frowned at the little mementos that mundanes liked to scatter around their homes-- bibles and trinkets and wasteful possessions.

Following the beckoning of the blood in his veins, Asmodeus had found the child swathed in cotton and sleeping peacefully, thumb in its mouth and expression serene.

He’d stared down at his son for long moments, cataloging the dark hair and tawny complexion. Suddenly, the child shifted in his sleep, reaching out to Asmodeus before opening eyes that were identical to his own.

Captivated, Asmodeus has slowly reached his own hand out, allowing his son to wrap a little fist around his finger. Paternal pride had clenched his chest at the power contained in such a little body. Asmodeus could detect the magic running through the child and it was potent.

Asmodeus had stood over the crib for hours, watching his son sleep while his mind churned with plans. Lost in thought, he’d stayed until the night sky started giving way for dawn’s weak light and he heard the stirring of the house on the other side of the door.

It had been nothing to keep a watchful eye on that corner of the world and when he’d heard rumblings about a little boy wreaking devastation in a tiny village, Asmodeus had known it was time.

The boy-- soon enough, Magnus-- had been distrustful, frightened. Asmodeus had coaxed him closer, though, with a sincere smile and gentle touch. He’d waited for his son to accept him, to welcome him, to reach for him before whisking the two of them away from this pocket of the world.

The next decades had been everything Asmodeus had hoped. He’d honed Magnus’s magic and watched as his son grew into his power, as he wielded devastation on his own terms and not as an act of fear.

And what devastation it had been.

In some places, there are still whispers of The Great Destruction. Asmodeus’s tutelage had been as complete as it had been uncompromising. Magnus learned to control his magic until it was second nature. Mercy wasn’t a concept the boy had known and he’d watched, time and time again, as Magnus destroyed villages and punished the people who scorned him, who shrank back in terror at eyes that should have instead commanded respect and awe.

Still, he’d failed. As Asmodeus watches the way Magnus seems to sink into the bed, listless and disgusting with it, he shakes his head mournfully.

Somewhere, he’d gone wrong. Magnus had turned against him, against the father he’d never had but always wanted, against the one person who would have given him the world on a gold-plated platter.

He still remembers the day Magnus had turned his back on his legacy. It had seared through him, a maelstrom of disbelief and rage and sorrow. He doesn’t know where he went wrong, just that Magnus had sworn that he’d never become his father-- as if that was a bad thing, as though it was shameful to fall into Asmodeus’s shadow.

But look where they are now, Asmodeus thinks with a slow, private grin.

His son never learns. His spirit is indomitable but it can be manipulated as easily as any mundane’s. All he’d had to do was dangle Magnus’s lost magic before him like the most persuasive carrot and his son had completed a little mission for dear old dad, leaping through the fires of the damned a second time in as many months.

He’s had Magnus in Edom for several days and he’s greedily watched as Magnus’s spirit had plummeted hour by hour until he was left in his room, pitiful and pathetic.

The shadowhunters are chasing their tails in the city. Magnus’s boyfriend is beside himself and it’s been an amusing diversion to watch as Alexander runs himself into the ground trying to find where Magnus had gone.

Everyone around him has started suggesting that it might be time to give up the search. It will be interesting to see how long it takes for Alexander to follow suit.

Asmodeus can already picture telling Magnus-- showing him-- that his lover had given up on him. Yet another fickle human unworthy of his son.

They’re all the same, honestly. Asmodeus wonders if this time, Magnus will listen to him, if he’ll understand that his father is his one constant, the only person who loves him and will love him through the passing centuries.

Magnus was a fighter, he’d give his son that.

No one understands a father’s love, Asmodeus muses. No one can understand the depth of feeling, the pride that is just as easily displaced with bitterness. Asmodeus will always welcome Magnus to Edom with open arms and his vision of the future has never wavered-- Magnus at his side as they rule together.

A legacy that strikes fear and respect and admiration and awe in the hearts of demons and mortals alike.

At first, Magnus had been furious at the perceived betrayal. Asmodeus had returned his magic to him-- what lost was so easily regained-- and locked him in his old suite in Edom until he’d seen reason. He’d watched as Magnus had been consumed with fury as he’d searched feverishly for an escape.

He’d watched as Magnus’s shoulders had slumped as he hadn’t found anything, as the days had passed and he’d remained trapped. It was for his own good and Asmodeus knows that he’ll come around eventually, that all will be forgiven as soon as Magnus realizes just how much Asmodeus loves him.

Taking a step back, Asmodeus waves away the viewing window and turns on his heel.

Magnus is breaking but he isn’t broken yet. His thoughts fill with ideas as Asmodeus walks away from his son without a backwards glance.

Magnus barely looks up as the doorknob turns.

He’s angry but it’s distant. His goddamn father always has another trick up his sleeve and Magnus will never fucking learn that apples from Asmodeus are poisoned to the core.

He’d naively thought that he could regain his magic if only he completed a little mission for Asmodeus. But he’s stuck here, in this filthy ruin of a castle.

He’s sworn time and time again that he wouldn’t return to Edom, that he’d walk away from his father and never come back but here he is like a fucking fool, playing right into Asmodeus’s hand.

It’s galling. It makes bile rise in his throat.

Magnus is stuck here until he can find a way to escape. The days have started blending together and he’s tired. It seems like Edom saps the soul right from his body. His dreams are plagued with nightmares and his thoughts turn to Alec whenever the darkness is particularly heavy.

Alec is his lighthouse in the thunderstorm. When things get too hard, when the nightmares leave him gasping and sweating, he thinks of his boyfriend.

He wonders what Alec’s doing now. He wonders how Alec’s doing. Hopefully, he’s taking care of himself and Magnus desperately hopes that Alec knows where he is.

After all, he was only supposed to be gone for an afternoon. Like an idiot, he hadn’t told anyone where he was going and his appointment book only has the ever helpful client designation in the time slot.

“Magnus?”

Magnus blinks slowly before it registers who’d just spoken and then he’s sitting up so fast he’s dizzy.

Alec is standing in the doorway.

Alexander.

His expression is grim but Magnus sees emotion in those lovely hazel eyes. Alec’s gaze is watchful, ever the soldier, as he takes a look into the corridor before focusing back in on the room.

His bow is ready in his hand and he takes a single step inside. Magnus cringes a little as Alec studies him, eyes sweeping from head to toe. He knows that he’s a sight for sore eyes and he wishes that he could look better for Alec, even if the thought is ludicrous right now.

“Are you alright?”

Alec’s tone is curt but Magnus tells himself that Alec’s just hypervigilant right now. For heaven’s sake, the man has stormed hell to save him. Now wasn’t the time for grand declarations.

Standing, Magnus straightens his shirt. It’s both a nervous tic and an attempt to look not quite as ghastly as he’s sure he does.

Alec doesn’t seem to notice.

“I’m better now that you’ve arrived, darling. Where are the others?”

“The others,” Alec asks, frowning for a moment before his expression smooths out.

Magnus stares at him, incredulous. “Don’t tell me that you’ve come here by yourself, Alec. As happy as I am to see you, I don’t want you pulling hare-brained schemes in an attempt to rescue me.”

“I’m your boyfriend,” Alec says, shaking his head impatiently. “It’s my job to protect you.”

Something about his tone is off but Magnus can’t put a finger on it. The words are halting, frozen. They don’t fill Magnus with the warmth he’d ordinarily feel and it’s jarring.

Chalking it up to the trauma of Edom, Magnus walks toward Alec, smiling. “I assure you, Alexander, I very much appreciate this mission but let’s not be hasty. I don’t need protection. I think you’ll agree that Asmodeus is a particularly vile devil and that these are extenuating circumstances.”

Clenching the bow, Alec’s shoulders are rigid as he replies, “I don’t think you know who you need protection from.”

Magnus rears back as though he’s been slapped. “Excuse me.”

Grabbing his hand, Alec pulls him closer. His grip hurts and Magnus has to fight his instinct to pull out of the hold.

“You think your father’s the devil incarnate but he saved you from starvation, from filthy streets and certain death. His power runs through your body. He’s given you everything you could wish for and more. He lauded you over his other children and this is how you repay him? You sicken me.”

Magnus chokes on a breath as he stares into Alec’s eyes. The grip has turned punishing and he feels bone grind against bone as a dull ache starts in his wrist.

“What,” he whispers. Swallowing painfully, Magnus bites his tongue. He hopes the pain will clear his head or awaken him if this is yet another nightmare but it doesn’t do anything, it doesn’t change anything and Magnus is left standing in front of Alec as confusion and dread swirl around him.

“I don’t love you,” Alec says coldly. “You were a convenience, a way to test the waters but I’m tiring of you. Do you really think that a shadowhunter could want a warlock, could love something half-demon? Did you think I could? Yeah,” Alec says softly as his nails dig into the softness of Magnus’s skin, leaving bruising crescents in their wake. “I bet you did. And that makes you stupid as well as weak.”

His stomach turns and it’s all Magnus can do to swallow the bile that scalds his throat. The words pierce him, splintering his heart into a thousand pieces before crumbling it to dust.

“Alexander,” he mutters hoarsely. “I don’t--”

Before he can finish the sentence, something’s happening. Alec’s face blurs, morphs. His body changes, leans out as thin fingers dig into him.

And then it’s not Alec standing in front of him but Asmodeus.

Everything crashes down on Magnus in an instant. It’s a burden that bows his shoulders, that makes them tremble as he tries to keep his knees from buckling at the realization that Alec was never with him, that escape is as far away as ever.

“You bastard,” Magnus hisses and recoils as Asmodeus smiles warmly.

“You’re welcome, son.”

Biting back a retort, Magnus can only ask, “What are you talking about? Why the hell should I be thanking you for pulling such a heinous stunt?”

“You think that was a stunt?” Asmodeus’s mouth forms a moue of distress. “That was a lesson, my boy. Alexander Lightwood is the latest in a long line of self-righteous shadowhunters who think it sport to hunt our kind. You are nothing to him but a willing body and it pains me to see you sink so low. You need help, Magnus.”

“And what,” Magnus bites out. “I’m supposed to believe that you’re the kind of help I need?”

“I’m your father, boy. I’ve only ever had your best interests at heart. Forget about Lightwood and come home. Return to my side and we will forget about mortals who are beneath us, who could be so easily crushed under the heel of our boot. You’re made for better things, bigger things, than to degrade yourself with a shadowhunter and pander to people who will never know the kind of power you possess-- and would condemn you if they ever found out.”

“No,” Magnus says. “I will never forsake everything that makes me human just to turn into you. I made that clear centuries ago and that will never change, not as long as there’s a heart beating in my chest.”

Asmodeus doesn’t say anything for a moment, studying Magnus with eyes that make Magnus’s skin crawl. Alec might love them, might’ve tried his damnedest to make Magnus love them, but every time he looks into his unglamoured gaze, Magnus is reminded of his father and of a past that haunts him, even after centuries.

“We’ll see about that,” Asmodeus finally says. “Sooner or later, we all must return to the houses of our fathers. You’re lucky that yours is so benevolent, Magnus. I know it will take time for you to come around.”

He steps closer and Magnus stands still through sheer force of will as his father tilts his head up with a finger under his chin.

“Lucky for us both then that we have all the time in the world, isn’t it?”

With that, he turns on his heel and leaves as suddenly as he’d arrived. Magnus stumbles back as the door closes and sags onto the bed. It feels like he collapses in on himself as he bends over, burying his head between his knees and trying to get his breathing under control.

God damn Asmodeus for wearing Alec’s face and damn him for believing it.

“Jesus Christ,” Magnus whispers, throat working as he gasps out a breath. He’s shivering, cold even in the infinite warmth of Edom.

He knows-- damn him, he knows-- that Alec didn’t say those words, that Alec hadn’t flung those vile words at him.

He can’t stop repeating them, though.

I don’t love you.

Did you really think that I could love a demon?

Burying his hands in his hair, Magnus grabs fistfuls and pulls until his scalps stings, until the pain clears the fog.

Edom is nothing but tricks, but smoke and mirrors, and Magnus has been away for far too long-- yet never long enough-- if he’s forgotten that painfully learned lesson.

Alec’s out there and he’s looking for Magnus. Magnus needs to remember that, to believe it, otherwise he’ll go insane and when Alec really does find him, there will be nothing of worth to bring back.

Magnus crawls into bed and lays on his side, tense as if waiting for another blow, this one fatal.

He’s still in the quiet of the room, all of his thoughts focused on Alec, on the love that burns bright between them. It will be his saving grace, that much Magnus knows without a shadow of a doubt. He plans and he plots but Asmodeus won't let him go so easily again and Magnus despairs of finding a way out without help.

His boyfriend’s voice is a soothing background in his mind as Magnus stares at the chipped, ruined paint of his bedroom wall.

There’s something dark lingering under the surface, though. Magnus tries to ignore it but it seems to spread like ink on parchment.

It stains his heart even as he fights against it.

Asmodeus watches as Magnus breaks a little more over the next weeks. The next time he’d masqueraded as Alec, Magnus had fallen for it again.

Along with the time after that, and the time after that.

He’d watched the light go out a little more each time Magnus’s hopes were dashed. Every time he heard Alec denounce him, reject him, Magnus grew a little smaller, his eyes a little more hollow.

Remembering Magnus’s vow-- not as long as there’s a heart beating in my chest-- Asmodeus works, slowly, painstakingly, to grind the offensive sentiment into dust.

By the time Asmodeus is done with him, love will be an anathema to Magnus. All that will be left will be power and strength and a duty to his father.

Asmodeus loves Magnus but he doesn’t need that love returned. No, he just needs Magnus with him. Whatever that takes, Asmodeus is more than willing to do.

With that thought in mind, Asmodeus closes the window on Magnus, who was babbling to his imaginary love about Tokyo of all things.

It’s less than a thought to shift form into Alexander as Asmodeus reaches for the door to Magnus’s quarters.

By all the demons in hell, Asmodeus will break Magnus if it’s the last thing he does.

There is no escape. There is no respite.

Magnus is his and it’s time that the world remembered that-- that his son remembered that it was him, Asmodeus, who was responsible for his very existence.

Opening the door, Alec is greeted with a dull stare. Magnus tries his best to ignore him but like a moth to a candle, he’s pulled into the scene for the dozenth time, hope flaring bright before being mercilessly crushed.

Alexander will be Magnus’s downfall.

Asmodeus will make sure of it.

[the-twin-trollhunters]

it’s been literal ages since i’ve actively DONE anything with this blog but i really wanna get back into developing this au since i love it a lot,, even if “developing” is more just. writing scattered drabbles and snippits instead of writing through it chronologically so...

if you have questions or prompt ideas or cool thoughts about any particular era, please do let me know, i love talking about this crossover! 

the 5 eras of this crossover:

Era 1: (August 1967- June 1968) Glass Shard Beach/Quartz Shard Cove Era 2: (1968-1982) Stan in Trollmarket/Ford’s research years Era 3: (1982-2012) Wilderness Years Era 4: (2012-2016) Summer 2012 and beyond Era 5: (Spring 2016~) The new trollhunters

(a ton more rando ideas under the cut)

Era 1: (August 1967- June 1968) Glass Shard Beach/Quartz Shard Cove

Big ideas: -Stan finds amulet, discovers underground civilization of trolls alongside Ford -Helps protect Quartz Shard Cove, the troll city below them, over the course of senior year -Major foes are Korsiva (a disgraced ex-general of Gunmar who’s been in hibernation for years) and an east coast branch of the Janus Order -Stan and Ford’s baby nephew (son of their big brother Shermie), Alexander, gets swapped out for a changeling. Chaos ensues. -Carla- Stan’s best friend- is brought into the fold/fights alongside the twins. -That time they recovered a single piece of the Killahead that was unguarded- they learn the changelings are trying to rebuilt it early in this AU. The piece is stowed away for safekeeping in Trollmarket, deep in the catacombs.  -Over time there’s found family themes with Alex the changeling, and he ends up defecting from the Janus Order entirely.. after experiencing all the horror of the Darklands, he just wants the chance to live a good and honest life. Through ancient magic, he finds a way to wipe the evidence of his existence from the Order. -Blinky and Aaarrrgghh pretty much slam adopt on all of these humans. -Stan and Ford’s relationship becomes more and more strained as the year goes on because Stan keeps pushing him away (thinking he’s protecting him by doing so)

Era 2: (1968-1982) Stan in Trollmarket/Ford’s research years

Big ideas: -After Stan is kicked out, he moves with Blinky and Aaarrrgghh back to Trollmarket. -Ford, to college. -Stan becomes really close with Draal during this time. -A lot of Stan’s work during this time is working to maintain peace in the troll world with the continuing threat of Killahead bridge being knowingly rebuilt, and trying to figure out WHERE the bridge pieces are being stored. (Currently it’s being hidden in a place far away from Arcadia.) -Ford still goes to Gravity Falls to research the strange and bizzare, and the Bill Cipher stuff still happens, except in this AU the Nightmare Realm and the Darklands are the same place, just this interdimensional dumping ground that Bill and Gunmar are both trapped within. They’re pretty much both competing to see who can get out first.  -Stan sent to go investigate the going-ons in Gravity Falls bc the trolls sensed an open portal to the Darklands there. He’s pissed and confused to realize it was his brother’s doing. -Ford gets sucked through the portal, along with Stan’s amulet.

Era 3: (1982-2012) Wilderness Years

Big ideas:  -The troll Tribunal forbids Stan from setting foot in any troll settlement in punishment for losing the amulet to Gunmar’s clutches. They’re essentially without a trollhunter for these 30 years. -Stan realizes the truth about Ford, that he was manipulated by an ancient eldritch being. Now feeling insanely guilty for leaving him to the whims of something like that, he begins to rebuild the thrashed portal. It may be ultimate treason to the trollkind he once swore to protect, but his family is forever more important to him than law. -Ford, meanwhile, discovers a shocking fact- the amulet calls his name too, and he can wield the armor and Daylight as well. He travels the multiverse for 30 years, learning more about the amulet and what it means to be a trollhunter along the way... crossing into dimensions where other trollhunters exist, gathering stones to use in it, gaining proficiency at fighting... -Alex- or as he comes to call himself, Lex- grows up, moves to California, falls in love with a human woman, and to his great surprise they’re able to have kids- twins. As far as he knows at that point, they’re essentially fully human- but they all know about his changeling nature. -They raise their kids in Arcadia. Occasionally, Lex does reconnaissance work for the trolls- Blinky and Vendel specifically.

Era 4: (2012-2016) Summer 2012 and beyond

Big ideas: -Lex sends his kids to GF for the summer for Stan to watch, paranoid that the Janus Order discovered what he did to their records and found him again  -Much of the summer is spent trying to uncover their Grunkle’s hidden past (he’s kept all the trollhunting stuff on the down low from family as a result of his disgrace from troll society. only lex knows the full story.) and what’s up with this mysterious journal in the woods. -The journal is p much the same except it has a toooon of troll stuff in it too. Ford’s a nerd. -Wendy is a changeling. Originally she was stationed in Gravity Falls to keep an eye on Stan and make sure he’s not up to no good, but she’s never actually gotten the chance to sneak into his basement to see what he’s working on. His security is too top-notch. When she’s finally a teen in human years she gets a job in the shack so she can get closer to him.  -Honestly I think she also flips. Just, all the changelings eventually flip when they see how great found family and friendships and anything that’s not Gunmar is, okay? XDD -Fiddleford isn’t actually entirely insane- but he’s still not all mentally there. Long story. He lives with his son and actually wears clothes most of the time. -Yknow I’m pretty sure Dipper and Mabel prob catch Wendy shifting between forms and that’s how they esp bond -Also let’s be real the two of them definitely end up exploring the troll civilization under Gravity Falls -the Wham moment where Ford walks out of the portal wearing the Armor of Daylight and everyone’s like :O OOO two trollhunters!!! ! -Weirdmageddon’s weirdness wave activates long dormant changeling genes for Dipper and Mabel, and they shift into troll forms. They’re a unique case of changeling because they are their own familiars. -Post 2012, the full story of what happened with the amulet becomes known to trollkind, and Stan’s ban from underground is lifted. He and Ford together continue trollhunting business, and they’re still a force to be reckoned with, even with their age. -In early 2016, the amulet leaves Stan and Ford, and stops responding to them both. The assumption made is that it senses the two of them are unable to carry out their duty anymore at their age, and has made the choice to move on. (normally a trollhunter just... would die long before they grew old enough for this to be a problem, so...)

Era 5: (Spring 2016~) The new trollhunters

-Dipper and Mabel are both 18, in senior year. They are fully able to shift between forms at whim by now. -Amulet picks Jim. A lot of broad canon strokes remain the same, but the trolls already are aware of the changelings still existing, and of the Killahead bridge’s threat- and have made the appropriate precautions. Tbh I still need to develop more logical divergences this new canon would make in what happens. -But I do know for sure that the changelings have to infiltrate Trollmarket to steal the stone Stan retrieved LOOONG ago in 1968 to even open the Killahead bridge at all.   -And I think Bular’s been out and about for some time trying to sniff out where this piece was being kept. His hunt has only recently brought him back to Arcadia. -Dipper and Mabel accidentally out themselves to Bular during the equivalent of the ep Young Atlas as they try to rescue Jim. This also outs the fact that ONE of their parents must be a changeling to the Janus Order.  -There is a Kidnapping that occurs,,, as Strickler is trying to pry info on where the last piece is from Lex, using Dip and Mab as collateral. Strickler gets the info he wants, sigh. -Through the battle of Killahead that eventually ensues, both Nomura AND Lex are sucked through into the Darklands. Not only does everyone want to rescue Claire’s baby brother, but they want to rescue Lex too. (There’s also some interesting ethics on whether or not they should rescue the REAL baby Alexander Pines afforded the opportunity, too. I’m still not sure if they do or not.) -When Jim goes into the Darklands, Stan and Ford return from their sailing expedition to keep the peace as best they can in Trollmarket/Arcadia. Sans amulet, of course, bc it won’t respond to them anymore but.. it’s something. -They’re there for the remainder of “S2-3.” -Ford ends up trying to defend Jim at the tribunal, but despite his eloquence still fails to convince them of anything. -When the Merlin quest happens, Dipper and Mabel are there as well. They can’t shift forms because of the magic ban, but their addition is enough to help fight off/kill Angor Rot and save Draal. -Ford knows from his journeys through the multiverse what Merlin aims to do (he’s met a future half-troll version of Jim, he Suspects) and is Against It. They fight alone at one point. -Battle stuff... Except the battle goes Fucking Wrong because of some key elements (no Angor Rot to blindside Morgana) and it ends up with the eternal night becoming permanent and some hellish frickin stuff, Morgana murders Merlin, she reconstitutes the shattered fragments of Bill Cipher within Stan’s mind (those two have History and that’s literally a whole nother Story please do ask me about it) and whisks him away in seconds to GF to go break Bill’s full essence free from his stone prison because she wants to p much steal his power for herself. -Ford found a sort of special amulet stone whilst in the multiverse that he’s been keeping all this time in case of emergencies... it allows the bearer to jump backwards in time, but only once. Only thing is, it’s also. in Gravity Falls. Kept safe in Fiddleford’s mansion. -Claire jumps them to GF via shadow staff. -Jim gets the stone and is able to use it like, just before they pretty much all die. He jumps back to RIGHT when Merlin wakes up in the tomb. -He realizes that the only real way he can stop all of this from going to hell completely is by making sure that all the shards of Bill in Stan’s mind are well and truly destroyed forever... and so they do just that. It’s a big dramatic mind demon eternal exorcism, a family/friends effort.

-there’s probably more but I’ve literally been rambling on like a noob. that’s pretty much the highlights. please do ask me questions about events/character relationships/places/timeline stuff/etc etc etc i would love to see them!

[nellie-elizabeth]

Outlander: Do No Harm (4x02)

I honestly had some pretty big issues with this episode, although I also admit that this type of story is very difficult to tell, and I'm not sure I have the answers as to how to tell it better.

Cons:

Okay. Outlander needs to confront the realities of slavery to tell the story it's trying to tell. I'm not sure the best way to go about that, but I am sure that this episode falls short of that goal. First of all, this story screams "white savior" to me. There are a few moments, that I will address below, that were actually pretty good, but the overall theme here is that Claire is disgusted with slavery and she decides to brashly interfere to save a young man who was sentenced to death for attacking a white overseer. Sure, her instinct to help is totally warranted and makes sense. But Claire's overblown compassion and concern for Rufus and for the other slaves is the focus of the episode, while the actual slave characters have virtually no say in what happens to them, whether Jocasta or Claire is the one pulling the strings.

Also, Jocasta is a complicated character, sure, but the show doesn't go quite far enough in condemning her for being a slave owner. They can't be sympathetic to someone who owns 152 people, and yet here they're trying to play some sort of middle ground. Jocasta doesn't separate families! Jocasta views some of her slaves as friends! Even Claire standing up to her isn't enough to reach equilibrium, here. Jamie, for his part, feels like he's just anti-slavery because Claire is. He has some generic sort of statements about how he doesn't like it either, but mostly he's just riding on Claire's coattails here.

Even Ian, in his conversations with new character John Quincy Meyers, portrays some troubling racism, although in his case it's towards the Native Americans. Again, this is a difficult line to walk, and book readers will know that Ian's journey takes him to some interesting places in regards to the nearby tribes. Here, we get this charming idea that "the natives really aren't that different from the Scottish tribes" because both are persecuted minorities whose land is controlled and culture is crushed by the British. That's a very... I mean, it's a nice thought, but it's also kind of patronizing? And Ian's fascination with the "Indians" comes across a little bit icky to me. Part of that is of course Meyers talking about how their women love hairy men, which jumped us straight into fetish territory.

Setting aside the social issues that this episode raises, I also want to say that this episode didn't feel as detail-oriented and complex as many of the others. We focus on some details of River Run, sure, but in the books the place feels real to me. It feels lived in. I remember that party scene being incredibly long and involving a lot of shenanigans, and here it's a couple of minutes, and some more white people being racist so Claire can glare disapprovingly. I think this is the product of a) less time in a television format to tell the story, and b) the episode's decision to focus primarily on the issue of slavery. Again, I really, really, don't know what the alternative should have been. If this episode had included slavery as a small footnote and then largely ignored it, I would have been pretty livid about that as well. I'm aware that I'm describing a problem without offering a solution, but... I guess this is a situation where you know a good episode when you see it. I've seen media do a good job of portraying this sort of moral situation, and I didn't feel that here.

Pros:

This episode did look stunning, though. River Run is amazing. The costumes are great as always. I don't generally spend a ton of time dwelling on those sorts of details, but I did want to give them a shout out here.

Jamie's dilemma about accepting River Run from his aunt was necessarily minimized by the larger story going on here, but I do hope we have time to explore that a little bit more in next week's episodes. For Jamie and Claire, owning slaves is a pretty insurmountable obstacle to being able to run the estate. But Jamie also has other feelings about the idea of owning land and being something of a "laird." He gave up Lallybroch for the protection of his family, but I think there's a part of Jamie that belongs in a leadership position, and he's struggling with family obligations, his own wishes to be able to support his family, the moral issues of slavery and the extremely harsh local law, and various other aspects. Maybe we'll get to see some of Jamie's thoughts on these subjects in the coming weeks.

For the most part, the new characters were amazing. Aunt Jocasta, while perhaps shown in too sympathetic a light here, was still excellently portrayed. Her blindness, her forthrightness, her genuine affection for Jamie, and her manipulative mind, were all shown off. I feel like you get a sense of who she is as a character within five minutes of knowing her, which is great.

Ulysses gets MVP for me for new characters, and it's here that I want to discuss the one moment in the episode that I felt handled the slavery situation very well. Claire has just saved Rufus' life, and Ulysses basically chastises her for it. He tells her that she's just made it so much worse for the rest of them. See, Ulysses seems to be perfectly content throughout the episode. He lives a life of slavery, but also a life of relative comfort. But in this moment, there's a crack in the mask. He all but tells Claire that he has learned to keep his head down in order to survive, and Claire's arrival has messed things up for him and for the other slaves at River Run. For Claire, who is genuinely trying to help, even though she has no appreciation for what's really going on, to be confronted and chastised like this, really added some depth to the situation. You can feel how trapped Claire is in that moment. If she tries to insist that she knows what's best, then she's speaking over the realities and the voices of the slaves, and that's really the last thing she has the right to be doing. But she knows in her bones, as does everyone who is watching the episode now, that the situation is horrific and slavery is a moral evil. How does she stand by and do nothing? I think a greater focus on Ulysses, Phaedre, and the other slaves would have helped this episode a great deal.

John Quincy Meyers is great. Yes, his conversation with Ian about the native tribes in the area was kind of gross, but he seems like just the affable, likable man we know from the books, and I'm hoping we get lots more of him. I'm also weirdly pleased that the whole skunk incident made it in to the show!

Okay, I'll stop there. I don't know how this episode could have done things right, but I know that I what I just saw, wasn't it.

6/10

[mysdrymmumbles]

Andraste’s Witch - Chapter 67 - SFW

Pairings: Slowburn Cullen x F!Witch!Inquisitor

Rating: M for later chapters which will include violence, PTSD, withdrawal,  angst, body horror (think red templars), and possibly other stuff that I will be sure to tag. This is not actually a grimdark story, but I just wanna give people a heads up for stuff that will happen. There will also be fluff and friendship and magic (though to be fair, this is Thedas, so magic will not always be positive and very rarely as adorable as that last statement implied).

Genre: Action/Adventure with elements of romance  

Summary: Finley has a rather unpleasant meeting with her demon.

Going for three chapters this month, lol.  Thank you to everyone who reads, likes, reblogs, and comments! Ya’ll are awesome :3

Chapter Warning: mentions of child abuse. 

Andraste’s Witch

Fragile Dreams 

Spires of uneven green rock floated in the sky, with a few smaller, loose rocks punctuating the empty air. The path she was on snaked out into nothingness ahead, a few haphazard attempts at buildings hanging near, but not connected to it. Wisps played in the distance, darting after one another, an occasional arc of magic crackling between them as they teased and played.

And above it all, the Black City hung, it’s dark outline somehow standing out against the void around it.

The Fade was a bit more obvious than usual, almost clear—it was still too bright and too fuzzy, yet somehow she felt almost like she’d been drawn back into the Fade physically. Solas had mentioned that there were likely to be more side effects for the mark. Could this be one? Could it somehow draw her closer into the Fade?

The mere idea of it made her uneasy.

She tried to think back to her last memories. They’d started the trek to Denerim. Despite wanting to cuddle up to Cullen every night, he’d pulled her aside the morning they were to leave and explained that it would look unbecoming for her to be so intimate with her general. It would look like their relationship had sway over opinions and decisions.

Finley didn’t quite understand that, but she’d asked Josephine casually about it—she hoped it had been casually, as she didn’t want to get Cullen in trouble—and Josephine and Leliana had both confirmed it.

In the end, it boiled down to politics.

Josephine had seen Finley’s irritation and offered her that a quiet relationship out of the public’s prying eyes wouldn’t be so frowned upon.

Finley didn’t see that it mattered. If they both did their jobs, what did it matter if they were sleeping together?

And why couldn’t they on the trip up? It was just sex. It wasn’t like she was demanding he march the templars a certain way or she would flit off in the middle of it to leave him to please himself.

He was right there, and yet she was expected to treat him like any other person in the Inquisition.

It frustrated her more than she would have expected.

Curious. I would not have expected you to fall so readily for a templar.

Her stomach turned at that familiar non-voice, that echo in her mind that never quite reached her ears.

Whirling around, Finley grew still.

A desire demon—her desire demon—lounged a short ways behind her, the demon playing with a wisp and swooped and danced around her hands and horns, like a pet of some kind. With a wave of her hand, the wisp flitted off into the sky, disappearing with surprising quickness.

As Finley’s gaze snapped back down to the demon, breath held that the creature might have drawn closer, she found her still relaxed, though her dark eyes were on Finley, unblinking.

Long nails tapped lazily against an imitation of a large, mossy rock that she had seated herself on.

Finley knew that rock. It was one of her favorites in the Wilds.

She didn’t like the demon resting there, even if it was just an echo of the real thing.

What bothered her, more though, was that she hadn’t felt the demon’s presence, hadn’t even known she was being watched. Did that mean that the fear demon she’d felt after her before might still be watching her as well?

How exactly did Solas’ charm work?

You needn’t fret. You are safe.

Despite herself, she was almost disappointed that the demon still bore the telling traits of desire. After a few of Finley’s talks with Solas on the way back from the Wilds about how perception played a great role in what was seen in the Fade, she’d half wondered if she would see the creature differently, but the creature was still a desire demon, horns curving up and away from a ghostly face, black eyes with slit, white pupils watching her.

Always watching…

Finley wasn’t sure what to do. It had been years since the demon had come directly into her dreams like this. She knew Finley didn’t want her around.

The creature stretched languidly and sat up finally, appraising her carefully.

We must talk.

The words had been serious, echoing far less than most things did in the Fade, as though they were trapped in a small space. Her demon had never done this sort of thing before, though Finley had heard of it. She’d heard horror stories of other mages facing demons in their Harrowings, of how the demons manipulated the world to pull them in. To be let in.

That was not about to happen.

Frowning, Finley whirled away from the demon, only to find the scene she’d just turned away from in front of her. Echoes of both Donovan’s and Solas’ suggestions to confront the creature whispered in the back of her mind—no doubt easy for the creature to read—but Finley rejected them.

Once you preferred me, you know. The demon let out a wistful sigh. You asked for me. You wanted your mother to bring her ‘black eyes’ back. There was an odd fondness in those words.

The world around them shimmered and twisted and suddenly between the two of them, Finley saw a tiny, child’s version of herself, sitting with her mother—with the demon wearing her mother.

“Bird,” the demon murmured as she patted a finch on the head with a finger.

Finley’s tiny hands wrung together as she inched closer, whispering the word. “Bir.”

“Bird,” the demon reiterated.

Tentatively, Finley patted the bird, a little roughly, on the back. With a shiver, it took flight, soaring off into the sky. Finley watched it with wide, wondering eyes, a single laugh slipping out before she hushed herself, looking at her mother, as though to see what the response would be.

The demon simply smiled and drew her closer, holding her in her lap and petting her hair.

Finley stared up at the sky, watching the great blue stretch out overhead. “Bir…”

Pulling her attention away from the quiet moment, Finley scanned their surroundings, feeling dread curling inside of her. She couldn’t stay here. She searched the air and their surroundings for signs that a spell was in place. If she dispelled it, she could leave…

You will not ignore me today.

Finley glanced at the creature to see her past the frozen memory, standing close to the conjured image of a peaceful Finley with…that.

Finley took a careful step back.

Child, you test me.

“I’m not a child.” Finley hissed, despite herself.

More images burst to life around them, of her mother’s possessed form rocking her when she was little, teaching her other words, patting her head and telling her she would keep her secret if she cried.

Even as panic began to roil in her, Finley shook her head. Even as she tried not to let herself get swept up in the memories spilling forth around her, her gaze happened on her hand. Even here in the Fade, her hand was marked with that same, shimmering green.

An idea sprung to life, and abruptly she brought up her left hand, clenching her fist. The mark crackled and the images melted away.

For a moment, the two of them were silent. It was easily the first time that she’d ever directly challenged the demon in such a manner, and she felt fear prickling up her spine.

The demon looked mildly put out, though she simply shook her head. I told you not to fret. I’ve already rummaged through enough minds to know that children are rarely grateful to their parents. There was a hint of indignance in that last bit.

Shaking her head, Finley glared. “You’re not—”

Before she could finish, the demon was in front of her, almost nose to nose. She motioned around them as though she might bring back those earlier memories. Who fed you? Who bathed you? Who taught you your first words? Who kept them from drowning you in every puddle they came across?

Without meaning to, Finley winced at the last part, remembering her father’s complaints clearly. The Fade brought them back, a harsh, crisp edge to his disdain.

“Better to drown the rat than let that thing keep playing with it.”

Finley didn’t want to do this. She didn’t want to delve into the past, into all the things that had happened. She didn’t like to think back to before her time with Ser Caudry and the others.

Her host was of another mind. I have cared for you your whole life, even if you pretend you don’t remember. I’ve kept you safe from demons and mages alike.

The words were a challenge, an assertion that she could neither flee from nor ignore. The words ‘don’t cry’ echoed in her head as she tried not to panic. She took in a slow, ragged breath, meeting the creature’s stare. “Don’t pretend you never hurt me.”

For an instant, the demon looked truly, honestly distressed by the accusation. Her gaze broke away from Finley’s as though rummaging through her own memories. Then, at length, the creature shook her head. I did not. I protected you.

Finley stiffened. “You told him my blood would help his spells.”

I never bled you. I held you safe.

Without thinking, Finley’s face twisted with anger. “If not for you, he wouldn’t have bled me, hurt me, at all!”

He would have done far worse had I not intervened.

“It still hurt!”

The Fade twisted at her words, cracks shooting through the rock around them, jagged and empty. Everything felt too empty. There wasn’t enough air in the Fade, though that shouldn’t have been much of a surprise. Funny that she would need so much in a dream, though…

Stepping back, the demon looked truly unsettled by Finley’s words, as though they were some great revelation. Finally, her voice whispered out, far fainter than usual. He needed a reason to keep you.

Finley’s shoulders shuddered. “No, he didn’t.”

Children are supposed to stay with their parents.

“Not when they’re murdering, sadistic monsters!”

At that, the demon did something she hadn’t expected. Her eyes widened and then she looked away, as though searching for something and finding the Fade empty of it.

Finley felt light-headed and sick.

Could this thing in front of her really have never realized what she was doing was wrong?

The memories of the boy being let go, of all the others who had died when she didn’t want them to, came bubbling back. She tried not to think, not to let the Fade catch hold of them and bring them to the surface to be reenacted.

I do not know how to fix what has been done.

“You can’t.” The words were barely a whisper. She needed to wake up.

For a moment, the demon looked so incredibly hurt. The world around them shifted, the rocks more spiked than before, as though reflecting the creature’s distress. With both of them miserable, the Fade itself seemed to crumble away.

I could… She stopped herself with a sigh. You would not accept that.

The creature looked disappointed when Finley didn’t ask about what she had thought of. Disappointed, but not surprised.

I will leave you to your dreams of that pretty thing you curl up with at night, the demon offered, though the fact that she knew of Cullen left a bit of a pit in Finley’s stomach, but—

“You can’t hurt him.” Wake up, wake up, wake up…

The demon shrugged her command away as though it were nothing. Instead, her tail flicked behind her, agitated. After what looked to be an internal debate, finally, she turned away, flicking her hands up in defeat. Much more of this and I will forget why I drew you here.

Finley tensed, though the creature either didn’t notice her fear or ignored it.

This king you seek to ally yourself with. He considers himself a witch hunter. The demon stopped a few feet away, glancing back over her shoulder. He fears neither Flemeth nor her daughters, and will not care if blood does not tie you to them. And more than that, he has evidence of who your blood does tie you to.

For a moment, the Fade was eerily silent.

Finley was having trouble concentrating. The world spun, and she was rather sure it wasn’t just a whim of the Fade. Wake up…

“Why tell me this?”

For the same reason I drew you out of the Nightmare’s realm. For the same reason I always… The demon trailed off, looking forward again, body rigid.

“I never asked for your help.” Finley clarified, feeling that usual dread bubbling back up. “I owe you nothing.”

The demon let out a half laugh at that. It rang bitter, though when she spoke again, she didn’t argue. One last word of advice, whether you take it or not… The king and your newest playmate have seen eye to eye in the past. He may have left that Order of his, but he’ll always be a hunter, and we both know what you are.

No sooner had the words been spoken, the Fade shifted to something resembling sprawling fields, with large trees climbing lazily toward the heavens.

Finley’s eyes snapped open, and she jerked upright, her breath catching in her throat. Someone help her, but she couldn’t breathe. It was as though the air had been squeezed out of her lungs while she was in the Fade. No wonder she’d been so lightheaded.

Even as she tried to breathe, she felt something twisted around her ankles legs.

Half-awake as she was, she was sure the templars were making their move.

She flailed against the restraints, kicking and clawing until they came undone and fell away from her. As she dragged herself away, looking about at her surroundings to see how many of her attackers there were, she slowly realized that she was in her tent. As he gaze snapped back to her discarded bindings, she found her blanket, bunched up and torn in a few places.

“Inquisitor?”

She jerked her attention toward the flap of her tent, hunching closer to the ground. She didn’t know that voice.

“Are you alright?”

“Go away.” She snapped back.

There was a shuffle outside, and then the shadows moved to rearrange themselves across the tarp separating her from whoever that had been.

There were too many people here…

With barely a thought, she ducked out the back of the tent as quietly as she could and wove her way through the shadows until she found a sizable tree at the edge of camp.

Only when she was perched safely in the upper branches did her heart finally begin to slow. The wind was sharper and stronger in the upper branches, and she gulped down that cold, clear bliss. As the fears and fight drained out of her, she leaned back against the trunk, closing her eyes.

She wouldn’t get any more sleep tonight.

She heard what sounded like the whimper of a wounded animal, and even as she stopped to wonder what it was, she realized that she was the one making that noise. Tears spilled unwanted down her cheeks, and her chest heaved, even as she tried to tell herself to stop being so pitiful.

This was that stupid demon’s fault.

There was no way what she’d said had really been news. She’d thought those things so many times, it should have been able to pick up on them so long ago. That it could sit there and pretend like that…

Vile thing.

Vile liar.

Like she would trust something so wicked. Josephine had told her of the king’s mannerisms already. He did not like mages, but that hardly made him a witch hunter.

And Cullen…

Cullen was a good man. He wouldn’t…

“Finley?”

She nearly fell from her perch as the word broke through the quiet.

Curling in on herself, she dared a glance to her left to find Sera half hanging from one of the branches near her, brow pinched together, eyes gleaming in the darkness.

Relief flood through her, and she shuddered as she slumped against her drawn-up legs, resting her forehead on her knees.

The branch she was on creaked as Sera settled onto it in front of her. When she finally had the strength to lift her head up, Sera was leaning toward her, worried.

“If…” Sera trailed off a moment before pointing down at the camp. “You got someone bothering you, you let me know, yeah?”

Finley took in a few deep breaths before forcing an awkward smile. “Going to steal their breeches?”

“Pft,” Sera scoffed softly, frowning. “Deserve more than that for hurting you.”

Even as Sera mumbled something about candlewax in their ears, Finley reached up and ran her fingers through her hair. Her pinky caught on a twig caught in her tangles, and she frowned, reaching up to work it loose.

“So?” When she realized Sera was watching her expectantly, Sera rolled her wrist as though to drag information out. “What’s got you fleeing camp in the dead of night to cry in old trees?”

As she finally got the twig loose—with a few lonely strands of orange still caught around it that made her scalp sting for an instant—she sighed and dropped it. She opened her mouth to respond, though nothing came at first. Finally, she shook her head. “Bad dream.”

“Oh, hate those,” Sera offered, relaxing a little as she settled more comfortably on the branch, only to scowl and awkwardly half fall, half swing herself to another when it creaked ominously. When she was safely perched on a nearby branch so that they could still talk, she leaned against the trunk. Then, almost instantly, she perked up. “Best way to get rid of nasty feelings up here,” she tapped her head, “is to do something good. Something fun.” She drummed her fingers against the branch as she peered down. “Gotta be something we can do. Something that won’t hurt nobody, but could cause a laugh or two… We could—”

“Inquisitor?”

That was a familiar tone that normally would have sent a shiver up her spine. However, now, as Finley peered down to see Cullen standing at the edge of camp, peering around—with an occasional look up, though he hadn’t spotted them yet—she couldn’t help but remember what her demon had said.

He’ll always be a hunter.

“Wanna stay quiet ‘til he goes away?” Sera asked, frowning down toward the man.

She was a bit surprised how much she wanted to say yes, though instead she shook her head. “They’ll…” she didn’t like the words that came next, “need to know where I am.”

“Piss,” Sera muttered. “Point of that is to keep you safe, yeah? I got you up here.” She gave Finley a reassuring nod, though she sighed when Finley did. “Alright. Don’t tell him I’m here though. Had to sit through a whole speech about proprieties and necessities and all that shite. Didn’t listen to half of it, but got the gist. They don’t want me near their precious nobles. ‘fraid I might ruin something shiny and new.”

Even as Finley let out a soft laugh, Sera rolled her eyes and motioned down. “I’ll wait ‘til you lead him off, then.”

Carefully, Finley went down the tree, twisting around to the side furthest from Cullen and slipping quietly to the ground.

As she turned around, she just about had a heart attack when she turned to find Cullen mere feet behind her.

He’ll always be a hunter.

“You needed something?” She asked, trying to sound as innocent as she could.

Rather than answer right away, Cullen breached the distance between them and reached out to cup her cheek. “I received word that something was wrong, and when I came to check on you, you were missing.” His thumb stroked her skin softly. “You’re pale and…” He didn’t point out the obvious that she’d been crying.

A million different thoughts raced through her mind, so jumbled that they did little more than leave her feeling sick.

“Cullen, did you ever—” Her voice cut off as she started to ask about what the demon had said about him agreeing with King Cousland.

She was being ridiculous. There was no reason to listen to that monster.

None.

It was just trying to steal one more person from her, like it always did.

Without thinking, she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him, pressing her face against his tunic’s shoulder. For a breath, he stilled and she thought he would protest about all that damnable professionalism and the like.

Instead, he wrapped his arms around her, fingers in her hair and holding her close as he bowed his head, pressing a soft kiss to her head.

“Things will work out in our favor in Denerim.” His voice was calm and confident, though she felt his heart beat a little faster and knew he was making it up as he spoke. “We’ve done a lot for Ferelden already, so I don’t see how anyone can argue against the good we’ve done.”

Despite his reassurances, and his offers of Ser Barris knowing nobles and Josephine being quite good at what she did and the like, Finley’s mind couldn’t stay focused.

Even as she rested against him, her mind kept going back to what the demon had said.

There were so many questions that came with that, and she wanted to ask them all, to clear the air and know beyond a doubt that Cullen was the man she thought he was, that he was good and kind, as he’d proved to be over and over.

Yet…

Yet asking any of them felt like she was letting the demon influence her, and ridiculous as it was, that scared her more than anything else.

After all, she’d promised herself, hadn’t she? Again and again, as her world expanded and fell apart.

She would never fall to a demon’s sway.

Never.

Even if she was a demon’s daughter.