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slothquisitor · 1 year ago

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Enough for Now

Before setting off on their next adventure, Liv has a surprise for Astarion. They also have a very long overdue discussion. OR why aren't more of us using Magnificient Mansion in these post-campaign fics? Also featuring the dumbest joke I've ever written. I'm not sorry. Liv x Astarion, 4.5k, fluffy for once.

Also on AO3.

As Astarion retreats into his room at the Elfsong, he finds himself less frustrated by the impending day and the rising sun. There is an anticipatory air to this morning, though it is the end of his day. In some ways, time feels as if it is moving both too slowly and too fast. He has spent the last few days poring over tomes and city descriptions to pick where he and Liv will go from Baldur’s Gate. He settles on Neverwinter because it sounds big and beautiful and cosmopolitan. There are so many places he wants to see and explore and know…and now he can. The abundance of choice is still overwhelming sometimes, but he feels good about this one.

It’s not a short journey from here to Neverwinter, but there are some perks to traveling with a wizard. Liv has been preparing, scrying on locations, and learning as much as she can about the city, and she seems fairly confident she can get them there without a mishap. The risk doesn’t bother him at all. He’s just excited to finally go .

Once he settled on Neverwinter, the more impulsive part of him wanted to take off immediately, but Liv is a planner, an organizer. Especially since she’s getting them there with potentially risky magic, she wants everything to be just so. It’s not something that he will readily admit, but he’s grateful for her meticulousness, even if it means waiting just a little longer. They plan to leave tonight, and that means only one more day in this godsawful room while the sun shines.

Liv hasn’t returned yet, so he busies himself reading a travel guide he’s sure isn’t even half accurate about the different areas within Neverwinter. Beyond exploring the city, he doesn’t have a plan for Neverwinter. Yet. But he’s sure that once they get there opportunities will materialize. Showing up and causing chaos has worked pretty well for him so far, and he plans to do just that.

When Liv returns, her arms are filled with spell components and books and her eyes are bright even though she’s stayed awake longer than usual to run their morning errands. He greets her at the door, taking some of the books from her arms. She shoots him a grateful look as he steps over to the small, ever-crowding desk. The desk looks less like a desk and more as though someone ransacked a wizard’s library and component stash.

“I really should’ve taken the bag of holding with me,” Liv replies. “Rolan made sure I have anything I could need, and he sent me with a few tomes of interest that he found.”

“Nice of him,” Astarion replies sidestepping Liv so that she can take off her cloak. No part of him is going to miss this cramped room.

She shoots him a sheepish look as if she knows exactly where his thoughts have gone. “I have a surprise for you,” she says hopefully.

“Oh?” A surprise? Something she picked up while out shopping this morning?

She quickly picks up a few items from the desk and nods. “I just need a moment.” And then she sits tailor fashion, facing the empty wall. He watches as she sets out a carved ivory door, a silver spoon, and a bit of marble in an exacting line before she begins casting. Liv is at her best when she is drawing and directing her magic. She is precise and confident. There is much she is not sure of in life, but her magic has never been a question. She calls, and it answers. He loves watching her like this, the way her fingers form the somatic gestures and she whispers the words to speak her will into existence. He has watched her conjure fireballs, call down lightning, and even disguise their entire party, but he’s never seen her do magic like this.

As the spell finishes, he can feel the world tilt just a little, her magic reshaping reality. In a blink, a door appears on the empty wall. It is utterly out of place in this room of theirs. The door is painted a pretty light blue, trimmed in dark metal that swirls and filigrees. Even the brass doorknob is ornate, with vines and flowers, and other minute details he can’t quite make out.

“What is this?” he asks. Where does this door go?

Liv is triumphant when she turns to face him. “Well, I thought perhaps we needed a place to stay in our travels. There’s little difference between a tiny inn room here or in Neverwinter when the windows are drawn, after all.”

He doesn’t understand. What is this? “What…did you conjure a house or something?” He’s heard of such magic, of course, but it has always sounded more like folktale than reality.

Liv nods. “I’ve been working on it for a while, but it’s not a small bit of magic. But I thought maybe…it might be home.” She shifts a bit from foot to foot, and he realizes as she speaks that she’s nervous.

“Home?” The word still feels like a complicated one, still sharper than it should be on his tongue. Neither of them has a home, not really. Not beyond the abstract idea of this city. There’s a reason they’ve been stuck in this tavern since the brain was defeated. But as ever, Liv fearlessly leads them onward, banishing old, tainted memories while they forge new ones together.

She steps forward, extending her hand. “Come on.”

He slips his fingers into hers, a comfortable tangle that still feels like a novelty despite how second nature reaching for her is these days. She pulls him over to the door and looks up at him expectantly. With his free hand, he reaches out and opens it. He’s not prepared for what he finds on the other side.

It’s as if he’s opened the front door to an entire cottage that he’s never seen before, but it feels familiar all the same. He notices the books first, so many books. Every wall in this space is covered in bookshelves that are laden with tomes, the colorful spines shining in the warm firelight. A large fireplace crackles lazily to the side, and the whole space is littered with comfortable, mismated furniture that looks perfect for cuddling up with a book. There’s a long, wooden table that looks like it could fit at least twelve people tucked into a nook off the side of a small kitchen area. The kitchen contains no cupboards, just open shelves with bowls and cups and plates. It’s simple but beautiful, and he steps forward without even thinking, without even considering whether he must be invited in.

But nothing stops him, and together, he and Liv step inside this…place. He’s aware of the door quietly snicking shut behind him, but he’s still taking in the space. There are stairs to his right that disappear up around a corner, and there’s a door off the kitchen that sits open and inviting, and he catches the barest glimpse of a desk inside. The windows are bordered by soft, gauzy curtains, but there is nothing outside but a soft blue glow of night-time. A small door in the same style as the one they entered sits along each wall, but these doors are no bigger than a picture frame. They remind him of the dumbwaiter in the Elfsong, but they make little sense here.

He turns to look at Liv, who seems to be watching and reading his every reaction with rapt attention. “You…you created this?”

There’s a soft sort of wonder in her own expression as if she can’t quite believe it either. “I had some help, conjuration isn’t exactly my specialty, but yes, do you like it?”

Like it? Is she serious? “It’s incredible.” He releases her hand so he can wander. He touches the bookshelves, runs a finger along the spines of the books, and touches a soft, tufted chair by the fire. He can feel the heat of the fire warming the place. It all feels so solid, so real. “Where are we exactly?”

Liv considers his question for a moment. “Do you want the long answer or the short one?”

He laughs. “Spare me the lecture, please.” He often loves seeing her get lost in explaining a tangent of spell theory, but right now he’s more interested in understanding the simple answer.

“Think of it like a pocket dimension.”

Well, that certainly explains the lack of landscaping out of the windows. He steps into the kitchen, pointing to the open door. “What’s this room?”

She has followed in his wake, quietly watching him. Her cheeks redden a bit. “Our room if you’d like it to be. But there are more rooms upstairs if you’d prefer.”

He wanders inside the large and artfully appointed room. A comfortable-looking bed takes up most of the space, but there is a desk and component table in the corner. There’s even a bathing chamber connected to the room. Compared to the cozy chaos of the first room, this room feels softer, and less demanding somehow. As ever, she has offered him choices, options. The prospect of shared ownership of any part of this place is an intoxicating idea.

“Our room,” he confirms, and Liv’s answering smile is everything. Ours. How nice that sounds. He’s sure he’s grinning like a fool. His attention snags on another of those small doors he noticed earlier. He wanders over to it. “What are these?”

She walks over and opens the door. Inside, a small shelf slides out. There is a small stack of parchment and quills on the shelf. A notecard sits beside the parchment, and in the elegant script reads, Hello, Astarion. What do you require?

He looks at Liv questioningly. “What’s this?”

“The house would like to take care of you. Ask it for something you want.”

“Like what?”

She shrugs. “Anything.”

“ Anything ?”

“Anything.”

There are many things he could ask for, but he’s most curious about whether it could provide him blood if he asks. So, he writes down ‘human blood’ feeling the need to keep specific and yet simple. Then, she slides the shelf back in and closes the door. A moment later, the door dings softly, and she opens it back up. Sitting inside is a golden goblet filled to the brim with bright red blood. Tucked beneath the stem is a little note of parchment, it reads Enjoy in the same elegant writing. He picks up the goblet and gives it a sniff. “Where does the blood come from? Whose is it?”

Liv’s brow furrows. “I’ve asked the same question. I changed the spell and well, it’s worked in ways I didn’t quite anticipate. You see, the original spell provided servants to attend within the space and provide whatever we might ask for, but I didn’t want that. So I changed it, but now have the doors and well, we can put in any request and the house will do its best to fulfill it. But nothing here can leave; take it past the threshold and it will turn to smoke.”

He tentatively sips the blood. It’s…definitely human, but it’s odd. There’s almost nothing unique about it. Like drinking water. It quenches his thirst, but it’s not very fun. He sets the goblet down, considering the implications. With access to this, he’ll never have to worry about starving again. It’s both a relief and another sort of complicated feeling he’s not quite sure he wants to examine right now. “Well, that…that is very convenient.”

“It is. Especially since I don’t have much desire to learn to cook. But it’s more than food. The house can mend things, clean things, and provide almost anything you could ask for.”

“But it just can’t leave.”

“That’s the catch in a place that isn’t really real. And I’m sure there are limits I haven’t discovered yet. Come on, there’s one more room I want to show you.”

“Another room?” he asks incredulously. He’s not sure what else she could have in store after…well all of this. He follows her eagerly.

In the corner of the main room, tucked beside the fireplace there is another door, but this one is closed. She waits in front of it, looking more nervous than before, hands twisting together as if she’s not sure what to do with them.

“This whole place is ours…obviously…but I thought you might like a room that was just yours.”

He can’t remember when he last had a space that was his, just his. Even his bunk in the dormitory at Szarr palace wasn’t his…not really. Cazador often reminded him and all the other spawns that nothing in that house belonged to any of them. Besides, he spent almost as much time being tortured in the kennels as he ever did in that bed. After their abduction, his tent was the first place he’d had that was his. He had gathered odds and ends, pillows and mirrors, anything he could take and make his own; he was desperate to create something that was his . There was something about carving out a place of his own that helped him feel like a real person again during those first terrifying and exhilarating weeks of freedom. A whole room to himself sounds like an impossible luxury.

“Really?” But he doesn’t wait for an answer before reaching for the doorknob and opening the door. He desperately wants to see whatever she has built for him. When the door opens, he is met with bright sunlight. He draws back instinctively, lest it burn him, but Liv catches his elbow gently.

“It’s alright…it’s not real. It’s just an illusion. It won’t hurt you.”

He extends his hand out cautiously and feels nothing but the soft, unexpected warmth of sunshine against his skin. He twists his hand around as if he might be able to capture the rays of sun within. When it still causes him no pain, he steps fully into the room, eyes falling shut as he stands in the sunlight. “It feels real,” he whispers, marveling at the way it feels just like a gentle, golden morning.

Finally, he opens his eyes and drinks in the room. It is a glass-walled solarium. He cranes to see what might lay beyond the windows, but it is just bright light and nothingness. Plants hang from the ceiling and vine along shelves. There is a small sitting area with chairs and an elegant bright green chaise. A rug covers the wooden floor, but otherwise, it is open and waiting. Waiting for him to fill it…to make it his own.

“Gale helped me with the illusion. I left it rather empty in here so that you could tell me what you’d like it to look like, and the next time I cast the spell, it’ll be just how you want it,” Liv explains, her words are rambling, full of explanation he doesn’t need.

He realizes that he hasn’t said a word.

Her voice is quiet. “I know that it’s not the same as being able to go out during the day, but I hope that it will be enough…enough for now.”

Enough for now? This…this is everything. “You did all this for me?”

She smiles. “Well, most of the books are for me, but -”

He closes the distance, pulling her into a hug and effectively cutting her off. Her arms wrap around him, holding him as tightly as he’s grasping onto her. “Thank you,” he whispers against her hair. “This is much more than enough.”

He feels more than hears the sigh of relief, the way she curls into him. “You really like it?”

He pulls back just far enough to meet her eyes, cradling her head in his hand. “Like it? This…you are incredible. I love it. I love you .”

Her smile is a lovely thing.

“I do have some decor suggestions,” he adds.

She laughs. “I assumed you would. It’s our place, after all.”

Our place. It doesn’t quite feel real. He almost asks then if she was actually nervous he wouldn’t like it, but then he knows her well enough to know that answer. She spent the whole of her life being told she wasn’t enough, and despite that, she offers so much of herself willingly. Her heart is better than he deserves.

“I wish it hadn’t taken quite so long. I’ve been working on it since we defeated the Netherbrain, and I wanted it to be a surprise.”

He leans his forehead against hers. Of course, she has. “You know that some people celebrate their victories before immediately finding new causes.”

“Is that so?” she presses closer, her nose skimming his. Tone, light, teasing.

“Yes.” He tilts her head back and hovers a breath away from her lips. “Promise me that when we get to Neverwinter you’ll do some things for yourself.”

“I promise.” And she seals it with a kiss. Liv always keeps her promises, and that’s good enough for him. Good enough for now.

***

Watching Astarion wander with wonder around the home she had only ever dreamed in her mind makes Liv’s heart feel like it’s going to burst. She knows how much he’s hated being trapped in the Elfsong, and she wishes she’d had the magic and the components ready to give them both this place sooner, but the wait was worth it for the way he embraces her, calls her incredible. The world is big and their adventures will be too, but having a place they can always return, a home, makes it all feel just a little less scary.

When she kisses him, she doesn’t expect to be met with passion and urgency. It feels as though Astarion cannot get close enough to her for the way he holds her. He kisses her deeply, his clever tongue darting between her teeth, his fangs gently nipping her lips. His hands are insistent. He is a swiftly moving current, and she desperately wants to lose herself in him, let his lips and fingers pull her far from shore. He guides them to the chaise and they tumble down into the softness. There is no question of where this is going as he rolls his hips into hers and begins undoing the buttons of her shirt while her fingers tangle in his hair. She is already breathless, already pulling him closer.

They have only had sex a handful of times since the night in the cemetery when Astarion told her he wanted to try again. And they haven’t talked about it, not really. At first, it was because there was a big world-ending problem to solve and every moment felt like it could be their last. And then they were just thrilled to be alive and to have moments together. But now, there isn’t an excuse not to pause, to ensure they are on the same page.

As he parts her shirt and presses his cool lips against her collarbone, she whispers his name and gently cups his cheek.

“Hmm?” As he looks up at her, his red eyes are blown wide with genuine desire. It’s validating to see, and all the more reason to talk.

“I think we need to pause and talk for a moment.”

“You want to talk right now ?” His voice has dipped suggestively, but his hands have paused their exploration.

She sighs. “Not my best timing…but yes. If we’re going to be having sex more…regularly. We need to talk about it.”

He stiffens a bit. “I’m not exactly sure what there is to talk about, darling. I did need some time for our relationship to grow and for me to feel safe to re-engage in sex, but everything’s fine now.”

She runs her thumb against his cheek in what she hopes is a comforting gesture. “I’m glad that you feel safe, and like everything is fine. But I think we need to talk about what we’re both comfortable with, what we both want. Boundaries and all that.”

His brow furrows. “Oh…I…alright.” There’s a reluctance there that she wasn’t expecting, but she forges on anyway.

“For example, I don’t know how you feel about me initiating sex with you. I’d like to know your boundaries…the things you might not be comfortable with or things you want to try. Sex is complicated for you…and we haven’t always gotten it right. I just want to do better moving forward.”

“I appreciate that. I…I admit that’s not something I’ve ever done with a partner before.” He’s not quite meeting her eyes, and his fingers seem to be tracing patterns in the cushion beneath her.

If she’s being honest, she hasn’t quite had these conversations so explicitly with a partner before either, but things with Astarion are different, and she wants this to be something that lasts. “Let’s just keep it simple today…Let’s just talk about things we like and initiating sex. I’ve felt like you needed to be the one in control of when sex happens…so I haven’t felt like I could initiate. I don’t know if I’ve misread that.”

He lets out a heavy sigh, his weight settling down into her as he shifts them both to the side, so they can face each other on the chaise, but he’s not holding himself upright. “That’s…that’s not an incorrect assumption, and perhaps something I needed…before. But now, I think I’d rather like to be propositioned by you. I don’t think you’ve ever propositioned me.”

He’s not wrong. At first, it was because he had pursued her and then it had been simply out of respect for what he had asked for: time and space. “Good to know. And…what do you like when it comes to sex?”

She knows she was right about them needing to talk by the way Astarion’s face tightens at the question. His words are careful, less sure than he usually is. “I don’t know what I like. I like…everything I do with you. Even when it isn’t about me…I like watching you and knowing you’re enjoying my attentions. I do enjoy sex with you, to be clear, but I think I enjoy the bit after, better. When we’re just naked together.”

She smiles and turns more fully into him. “I like that too. I like the way I feel connected to you when we’re together like that. I wouldn’t mind cuddling naked any time really, no precursor sex required.”

“Any time?” he asks with a mischievous glint in his eye.

She laughs. “I draw a line at having an audience, but yes.”

“Our cemetery exploits haven’t broken you of that?”

“Not at all. What else do you like?”

He considers for a moment, “I like drinking your blood when I’m inside you.”

“I think I have picked up on that one.”

“Am I that obvious?” he cocks an eyebrow.

She shrugs her free shoulder. “It’s still good to hear you say it.”

“And you? Are you going to tell me what you like?”

“Yes…” As much as she’s the one who initiated this conversation, she can’t help the blush that warms her face. For his part, Astarion looks utterly delighted; she shoves his shoulder. “I like your mouth on me.”

“Oh, but there’s so many places for my mouth to be…do be more specific, darling.”

She glares at him. “Cunnilingus.”

“Ah yes. I’ve been told I’m quite the cunning linguist,” he says with such an air of pride, and the joke is so bad that she can’t contain the laugh that escapes her.

“Really? Cunning linguist?”

“You’re so adorable when you’re embarrassed. I had to do something,” he pulls her close and kisses her nose.

“You always make the worst jokes when I’m embarrassed,” she says. He has a rare gift for telling the worst jokes in moments like these. It makes her love him even more.

His smile tells her that he knows it. “Tell me something else you like.”

“I like it when you’re not entirely gentle with me. Not all the time, mind you, but I like feeling a little danger every now and again.”

“I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised considering you’re bedding a vampire.”

“Am I detecting the slightest hint of judgment?” she asks, feigning offense.

“Considering that I’m very much on the benefiting end of it, absolutely not,” he replies with a slight laugh. “Though that does sort of lead into something I’m less comfortable with…”

She waits while he searches for the words.

“You’ve never shied away from my true nature…but beyond drinking from you…I don’t know that I want to be reminded of what I am. That might change, but when I’m with you intimately I need to be reminded that I’m a whole person…”

“That makes sense.”

“With that said, I’m also not very comfortable playing with power dynamics. At least for now, I need to feel that we’re…equals.”

She tries not to think about why that is, why certain dynamics might be triggering for him. “That sounds very reasonable.”

“Is there anything you’d like to avoid?”

She considers for a moment. “I had a partner once who was sort of into degrading talk…I didn’t like that at all. Otherwise, I like the things we’ve done together too, and I’m open to trying new things as well as you’re comfortable. We’ll just keep talking through it.”

“I do like the prospect of more opportunities to see you embarrassed.” His eyes are bright and his arms tighten around her.

“Someday, I’m going to find whatever it is that makes you all flustered, and then you’ll never know peace.”

“Mmmm. Is that a promise?” He asks, burying his head into the crook of her neck and kissing along her jawline.

“Is this your way of saying you’d like us to not talk for a bit?” she asks, arching into him to grant him better access.

“Well, that’s entirely up to you. I always know I’m doing a very good job when you’re muttering unintelligibly.”

She swats at his shoulder as she feels his laughter shake them both. His lips find hers once more, and she melts into him. There’s still plenty more to discuss, but this is a start. And it’s good enough for now.

#astarion #astarion x tav #astarion bg3 #astarion x liv #bright lost things #healthy communication abounds here!#proud of these two #slothquisitorwrites

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