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#he's just .. what did we do to deserve him
lazylittledragon · 2 months
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ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:
i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???
#ramble#sorry i'm currently in a phase of 'of course this happened' and 'oh i deserve this because i didn't give him what he wanted'#like he knew i was grey ace since the start. and he let it go on for SO long after i said i might be vaguely aro as well#if that's a dealbreaker for you bc of your love language then FINE but NIP IT IN THE BUD#he said he put it off because he didn't want to hurt my feelings but it only hurt me MORE#like you're an adult. grow the fuck up and communicate like one#holding your negative feelings in hoping somebody notices you're hiding them is what TEENAGERS do#and also i told him VERBATIM: i didn't think anyone would ever love me because i'm not comfortable with xyz. and he just confirmed that#idk i still feel like i'm being selfish because how could i expect someone to be in a relationship with me when i can't give them anything#also tmi but it's not like we did NOTHING. we still held hands/cuddled/were close. he just didn't have his tongue down my throat anymore#so obviously i'm assuming by 'missing affection' he just meant sex and as an ace person that just fucking sucks#also oh my god i HATED how much he would imply we were going to have sex. i would have to keep SAYING 'i don't like doing this'#he always spoke like it was inevitably going to happen and it didn't click how GROSS i felt about it until recently#also ALSO not to go there but i never told him WHY i struggle with it (it's sensory issues)#and like. what if something had happened to me that made it hard for me and i just wasn't ready to tell him. and then he did this#again sorry to overshare this is still just a lot for me and i have no idea if i'm being unreasonable#if you're ace and in a relationship please let me know bc i'm starting to think it'll end this way every single time
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witchofthemidlands · 2 months
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everytime i watch anything that has paul mcgann in it i always sit there afterwards thinking what a fucking tragedy it was that he never got seasons as the doctor.
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moeblob · 7 months
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What if I straight up didn't explain myself? What if I just said trust me on this? Would you?
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homoeroticgrappling · 7 months
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Danhausen tweeted this after his GCW match and I couldn't help but think about his tweet when he started looking for bookings
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crustyfloor · 2 months
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The way Till looked genuinely pissed off because of Ivan but he’s not mean about it. Just thinking. The fact that he didn’t just say fuck off right then and there when Ivan asked him for a kiss, but he instead worked around it, as if after realizing Ivan was actually serious he said this as an attempt to pacify Ivan. because even though we get the irony here, it does look like Till trying to ‘let him down easy.’
Even his internal dialogue is harsh, but he doesn’t voice it.
And when Ivan starts whining and getting in his space again, Till doesn’t bother pressing it and just lets Ivan sulk, as if he’s simply handling a pouty child. Like he’s used to it and just letting it be, it doesn’t mean he liked it but Till really wasn’t trying to hurt Ivan.
(even more unsurprising how no punches were thrown, again. Till can only be provoked into acting that way, had this been Ivan’s perspective I’m sure this situation would have looked a lot more narrow-minded)
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sysig · 5 months
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Wuh oh (Patreon)
Bonus:
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The novel experience of being crushed by a giant rock, a visual metaphor
#Doodles#ISaT#Siffrin#Loop#Yaaaay suffering <3 <3 <3#Lol#Starting with a cute practice Sif to get used to drawing them a bit more they're so cute what the heck#He's so shaped I love that for him and about him#Crisp design very nice#Sif really is the embodiment of ''Ignorance is bliss'' and being so maladjusted about it :'D#His memory issues make the me a sad#Ironically I try not to think about it too hard or else I'll get Really sad lol#Memory is the foundation of individual personhood! It's such a tragedy weh#Him brushing things off by falling back into his issues is just so agh Sif no you deserve better!#Some sillies lol I never know if I should give content warnings for these kinds of jokes - I don't make them often!#Loop's line in the Jello streams is So good I couldn't not lol#Happy Wednesday fr btw lol yes I did do that on purpose#The last one agh the red and like - can we talk about Sif (and Loop's and Odile's) specific portraits where their hands do the spark thing??#I always forget how art can be Whatever and that overlapping/removing lineart to imply shapes and movement and just jfdslafd#It's so cool I love it so much it's very inspiring#The bonus is mostly a joke lol - again while watching the Jello streams Lenti was talking about how much she relates to Sif#And I was privately like ''Haha thank goodness I don't relate to him! Couldn't be me!'' And Then#It's fine lol I'm aware of my overlapping issues - I fall more on the Isa side of ''Sounds fake but okay'' but yeah.....yeahhhh lol#As long as I don't get trapped in a time loop about it! Poor Sif haha
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memoriamp4 · 3 months
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I hate that we never heard Astrid tell Hiccup 'I love you'. I was fully expecting her to tell him she loved him back in rtte 6x06 after he told her he loved her... but she didn't. Like they really made an entire episode about Astrid wanting a more lovely dovey relationship but then she never even said 'I love you' in the episode?? And Astrid has so many inspiring and loving speeches to Hiccup but I wish there was an 'I love you' included in at least one of them
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haec-an · 7 months
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have you ever seen anyone more beautiful
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sourtomatola · 9 days
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Ruin gets to kill 50 billion versions of his abuser. As a little treat.
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fisheito · 26 days
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yakuya in MY swamp? in MY ecosystem? no . i am still in disbelief. i hope you all know that my particles are bouncing off the everything. i am using periods as punctuation but the state of my mind is naught neareth final.
#the devs really did surprise me.....i'll credit them with that#i fully believed it was gonna be rei#i looked at that silhouette. saw the chunky heels. thought of kuya#but i scoffed at myself. tch. of course not. devs wont play with their strange topbottom segregation. i'll never get the yakuya event#at least not until it's with garu so they have a yokai hella exposition event#it's gonna be rei at a specific angle to SIMULATE a kuya. he will be wearing kuya-esque heels just to spite all the kuyafans#AND YET HERE WE ARE#UNDER THE SEA NO LESS#WHAT ARE THEY DOING INVADING MY SPACE LIKE THIS#like hell i'm gonna share my zone (abyssopelagic) with those accursed sirens#i'm going lower#i'm moving to the trenches. i'm gonna slowly lose the use of my eyeball sight . i'm gonna adapt to conditions#SO MANY conditions. maybe even learn to bioluminesce#actually no. then the predators might find me. and i'll have to regain the use of my eyes in order to improve my chances of escape#perchance even enlargen them like the giant squid. living in constant fear of a fox or a snake appearing in the depths#yet i get the creeping suspicion that kuya is just going to bully yakumo (when he's not bullying eiden)#kuya gonna drop a sad story about personal sacrifice and the difficult lives he's lived#and yakumo ever the baby in comparison will stare at him with his massive saucer eyes like.... do i... deserve to feel sadness?#if i have not gone through the trials and tragedies that master kuya has???#is kuya gonna be soft yokai grandpa or is he gonna be Auntie of Hard Reality#the boy just wants to find new soup ingredients#kuya will then unveil the ethical ramifications of harvesting these specific ingredients#and using them for a purpose other than their original spiritual intent by the indigenous merfolk#along with the questionable supply chain and processes that go into creating the ingredients in the first place#(not that any ethics or spirituality rituals or stuff like that is actually enough to influence kuya's behaviour in any way)#but it'll certainly mess with yakumo!!!! and that's where all the fun is?#furrows brow. what will they do with this event.....#i am so very excited to see them interact..!#mirage of scales#yakuya
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the directors said cut but jonah hauer king king heard slut and he went with it
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byfulcrums · 10 months
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Something I love about ATLA is that it doesn't force the "forgive the villain" on all the characters. It's been left clear that Ozai is a bad person, and there's no chance of redemption; the only reason he's not dead yet is because Aang is a pacifist
The one episode where a character is supposed to forgive someone who has hurt them in the past is the one where Katara is off to kill a man (which, fair) and Zuko helps. In that episode, even if Aang is telling her to let go, she doesn't forgive him. She never will. But she spares him. Not because she thinks he doesn't deserve death (he does), but because she's not willing to continue the cycle of violence
Killing someone can have a very important impact in your entire being, mostly depending on who you are as a person. Aang would've never recovered from killing Ozai. Katara wouldn't be who she is now, had she taken her revenge on the man that killed her mother
And the best part of it is that Ozai doesn't deserve to die. Not in a "I'm defending him" way (ew), but in a "he deserves worse that than" way
Taking away his bending was the perfect punishment for him. He believed bending made you superior and he never cared enough to train something besides his bending. What a loser. Zuko and Azula wouldn't be restrained by something like that
He's alive. Nobody has forgiven him. Nobody ever will
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naamahdarling · 1 month
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angelnumber27 · 3 months
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It’s so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they don’t give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.
#I fucking hate having bpd#while I’m at it I don’t understand the fuckin audacity some people have to say they love you and do horrible things to you#I feel so stupid#I feel so stupid for believing all the lies#but I was so in love and put him on such a pedestal that I just allowed it all.#thinking about someone constantly and grieving over them and knowing they’re perfectly fine and to them you don’t exist#I’m still in such a state of grief and I don’t understand why time hasn’t healed#it honestly feels like it’s gotten worse w time#I just torture myself but I can’t help it my brain wants me dead#it’s so painful I feel so fucking stupid#being abandoned with no closure by someone who’s your entire world#for someone they were unfaithful to you with multiple times (I don’t even know how many and dony want to know) immediately#like that was the plan all along#he took our cat hundreds of miles away and I don’t even know if he still has her or if she’s still alive and I miss her every day#I never loved someone like that and it feels like the heartbreak is actually physically killing me#i spent 1/5 of my entire life with him#I was my prettiest and had the best body at the time and I wasted it on someone who didn’t appreciate me#not wasted. it wasn’t wasted. we had some incredible times together#I’ll never be that beautiful again#and now idk what do so bc i can’t decide which is worse: being alone and isolating or loving deeply and ending up horribly hurt all over#it’s all just so upsetting.#and I feel so stupid for allowing it all#he knows more about me than anyone and he made me feel like he loved me so much sometimes and then did horrid things and it’s so fucked up#nobody read this I’m so embarrassed and horribly broken#it traumatized me so much there was so much abuse and pain idk if I’ll ever recover#I deserved it but it still hurts my heart#I was so mentally ill and sick I know it had to have been miserable to be around me#there are so many things only he understands and knows about me and I need to talk about them I j wanna b able to b there 4 each other#but that girl is so beyond insecure and controlling so. if I want to talk to who fuckin gets me I’m just fucked#why lead someone on like that for years knowing you’re going to abandon them the second it’s convenient
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i-didnt-do-1t · 7 months
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May be a controversial take, but I really Do Not think that Katherine should punch Jack after the rally when they’re in his ‘penthouse’ (and in no world would she)
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winepresswrath · 4 months
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i am going to wind up on team #justiceforarmand but it's going to be so situational. justice for armand specifically during the period of time louis is all "oooh who needs labels." a very different kind of justice for armand on matters pertaining to claudia.
#usually i would be like 70 years???#that's just your husband. sit in your choices as u might say#obsessing over your first love isn't going to change anything about what you decided to do and who you decided to do it with#but in light of claudia i'm forced to be like hm. well if you just wanted to torment him by dangling yourself in front of him for decades#that would be valid. like you should probably do more and worse but the time for that was before he did the atrocities to your child#so. here we are!#press says iwtv#interview with the vampire#the thing is i love claudia in all mediums she's my girl#but this version is so vulnerable and actually desperate for louis to see her and choose her#whereas while that's not absent from book!claudia she is notably higher on both louis and lestat's list of priorities#and i think more of a player. not that show!claudia isn't shooting her shot but u would never catch book claudia joining the bad news cult#because she's that desperate to be loved#book!lestat genuinely wanted her to stop being mad at him for cursing her to exist in the way they do and go back to playing happy families#evil of my evil etc#louis is sick of their mutual misery but armand really had to fuck with his head to bring the madeline situation about#also i am faintly annoyed that we don't see her souring on the possibility of making friends within the coven more directly#like did she conclude they'd turned too inward to be friends the moment she got that dress?#anyway. regardless. does she not deserve love? and mass murder?
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