#he’s like my textbook of favorite character tropes

[thediamondswordsman]

What a pain.

[soujux]

24 for 2024 — BL Series Wrapped

Despite my lack of posting and writing last year, I still spent so much time watching series. Honestly, more time than the time I spent working on several final paper. So, here's a semi-comprehensive summary of what I watched and enjoyed.

I watched 24 shows in 2024. Not including Your Sky, because it's on-going.

3 from South Korea. 4 from Thailand. 17 from Japan.

Released in 2024

Show titles and the little notes I wrote while being half asleep.

I Hear the Sunspot

Kouhei fell first for hungry boy Taichi.

Friends-to-lovers in my Japanese BL? Fork found in kitchen!

Kouhei has an auditory impairment, so Taichi (tries) to help him with his studies.

Taichi ultimately fails, but wins Kouhei's heart anyway.

Cosmetic Playlover

Mamiya works hard (serious) but Sahashi works harder (romantic).

Domestic fluff.

Men in a women dominated workplace.

Is this considered an office romance?

Perfect Propose

Burnt out office worker (Hiro) stumbles upon a younger man (Kai) who claims to be his fiancé.

Forced proximity if you squint.

Flirty aaah Kai.

Takara's Treasure

Grumpy Takara/Sunshine Taishin/Mountains

"Is it true that gay people exist?" - Taishin probably.

Asexual characters (Source: Me)

Japan presents its favorite "senior/junior" trope.

It's 25:00, In Akasaka

Yuki wants to be a star, so he acts in a BL show with super star Asami.

Oh, they also know each other from college.

Sensual melodrama with a fake-dating trope.

Love is Like a Poison

Lawyer Ryoma thinks he's in a legal drama when he's actually in a BL.

Sexy Lawyer x Sexy Scammer = Fluffy Downbad Boyfriends!

Haruto is Ryo's husband, but is also my wife (crime of the century).

Well-written characters for a well-written story.

Happy of the End

"Fuck it. Guess we both ain't shit." - Haoren and Chihiro

They were, in fact, not happy at all.

Unethical use of sex toys.

Read warnings before watching.

My Love Mix-Up (Thai)

A Japanese culture incorporated in Thailand made possible by making Mudmee half Japanese.

Just confused boys (Atom and Kongthap) falling in love.

Century of Love

Grandpa san waits a hundred years for his wife to be reborn only to find out that her reincarnation is a boy (Wee).

Grandpa learns what "gay" is and fell deeply in love with his husband.

Love Sea

Rich novelist Tongrak buys flirty island boy Mahasamut and brings him to Bangkok.

Good sound design in my Me Mind drama? A treat!

Would not recommend to everybody, but if you're into a sexy romance show, then this one is for you.

It has enemies-to-lovers, pet play, master-servant dynamic, rich boy x poor boy fantasy, falling in love, age-gap, and FortPeat.

My Stand-In

Joe gets transmigrated to the body of another Joe and fatefully bumped into his crazy ex-boyfriend Ming.

A BL with the plot of a telenovela.

Let go of your morals for this.

Joji's "Glimpse of Us" plays in the background.

A Time of Fever

Donghee's actor portrayed his role as someone who wishes that Hotae isn't gay to protect him from what he went through.

A coming-of-age story of self-discovery told through beautiful mis-en-scene.

Love for Love's Sake

Isekai in my BL?! Sign me up!

Myungha is given another chance to live in a game created by god himself.

Fictional character Yeowoo suddenly finds himself a protective clingy senior.

Gay, mental illness, and actors who looks like Soobin.

Released in Previous Years

More shows and more notes written from dreamland.

A Man Who Defies the World of BL (2021)

Straight man (Mobu) gets isekaied to a BL world.

The title is the story.

A world where homosexuality is the norm, and heterosexuality is unconventional.

Minato's Laundromat S1 (2022)

Age-gap nobody asked for.

High school boy (Shintaro) falls insanely in love with laundromat owner (Akira).

This is textbook BL live-adaptation.

Takara-kun to Amagi-kun (2022)

Sweet boys Takara and Amagi navigate their relationship in high school.

Grumpy x Sunshine trope and Popular x Nobody trope

They want each other so baaaad!

God's Favor (2022)

Yashiro dies after confessing to his childhood friend Kenta, but transmigrated as Kagura by choice.

Iconic line: "Why would you come back to me as a woman?"

Kagura and Rin yuri.

Everyone is bisexual.

My Beautiful Man S1 (2021)

Me (Hira) and the bad bitch (Kiyoi) I pulled by being autistic.

Whipping boy trope.

How not to start a relationship: see your partner as a god.

Finger sucking in my BL again.

My Beautiful Man S2 (2023)

"There is no way that my boyfriend who makes love to me every night actually loves me!" - Hira about Kiyoi

They match each other's freak.

Established relationship and domestic fluff.

My Beautiful Man: Eternal (2023)

Hira finds other (healthy) interests besides Kiyoi.

Celebrity x Photographer

Life changing franchise with an actor who looks like Beomgyu.

Became the Main Role of a BL Drama (2023)

Celebrity Yuichiro and former child-actor Hajime cohabitate for a BL series.

Freak x Anxious Boy

My Personal Weatherman (2023)

Weatherman Segasaki successfully pavloving his stay-at-home boyfriend Yoh into getting horny when the sun comes out.

Yoh being too blind to see just how much Segasaki is in love with him.

The exploration of Japanese couple dynamics and "amae."

I Cannot Reach You (2023)

Yamato is in love with his childhood friend Kakeru.

Low stake problems presented as high stake problems.

Yearning and eager kisses in my BL? Aaah childhood friends-to-lovers.

Yamato has the prettiest eyes!

Sing My Crush (2023)

Everyone knows that Baram and Hantae are married except them.

Best friends to soulmates to housemates to lovers (finally)

Hantae realizes that he's gay after acting upon it.

Singing in my BL as usual.

To wrap-up this comprehensive summary, I'm rewarding certain shows with special awards, because it's so much fun that way.

Best Writing

Love is Like a Poison (2024) - Ryoma's narration gave the show so much personality, but the most commendable about this show was how it kept getting better and better. The ending was perfect, because it provided the audience with continuity while simultaneously tying all the loose ends. It was not greedy! It understood what the show needed, especially for Haruto's character.

Love for Love's Sake (2024) - The concept of isekai is not new, but this show added its own twists to made it one of a kind. There were great choices made in this. It knew the perfect time to reveal information that would greatly benefit the narrative. Not only that, the show also managed to surprise me by being a mental health advocate. A little fact, this had one of they saddest break-up scenes I've seen last year.

Honorable Mention: My Beautiful Man S1 (2021) - The show provided me so much space for thinking, wondering, appreciating, and understanding of Hira and Kiyoi's relationship. The story had conflicts unique to the characters, and it was overall, so literary. The monologues were my favorite part along with the switching of point-of-views.

Most Beautiful Mis-En-Scene

A Time of Fever (2024) - This show bathed in sunlight! The yellows and oranges are so beautiful, so fitting for the coming-of-age theme, and so perfect for a prequel that's supposed to tell a story of the past. Every location is well-lived. They don't feel like sets, but real places. The camera work is perfect! Each frame is deliberate. There is a quality of intruding that makes all the scenes between Hotae and Donghee so raw. It's just an overall eyecandy.

Honorable Mention: Love for Love's Sake (2024) - The show has one of the best camera works on this list, but I did find it repetitive. Everything else is so pretty though.

Best Scene

Hira's Self-Pleasuring Scene in Episode 1 of My Beautiful Man (2021) - Hear me out! This scene surprised me, almost appalled me, so much. However, after rewatching the show 4 times at least, I grew a profound appreciation for the scene in connection to Hedonism. Hira wasn't even touching himself! He's merely looking at Kiyoi's face and thinking about him. I'll be talking more about it in a post one day, but you've got to give me a chance first.

Haoren and Chihiro's "first kiss" on the boat in Happy of the End (2024) - Well, something about them going on a date, kissing for the "first time," and Haoren telling Chihiro he "wants to die," altered something in my brain. The vulnerability was so loud—I swear I can peek into Haoren's soul if I looked into his eyes long enough. I've never experienced a scene like this before.

Best Official Soundtrack

Re-Move On by Gemini and Fourth - The impact of this OST is undeniable. Not only that, this song is so good! I'm glad they kept the streak of good songs since My School President.

geometric by osage - This song genuinely fit the feeling of Love is Like a Poison, and the sound directors perfectly knew when to play the song at the end. I genuinely see the show flash before my eyes whenever I listen to this song. It sounds like the ending of an adventure. Too bad, it's not talked about enough.

Other technical awards will be added in future lists once I get better at my production classes. Best editing, best script, best score, and everything else are way out of my expertise. I'm afraid I'll have to pass on this first. Here are categories created without much logic, just instincts:

Certificate of Appreciation for Better Sound Design

Love Sea (2024) - After the hell my eyes went through in Love in the Air, the company finally improving the audio equipment, and doing a better job at editing the recordings. Listen, it's not perfect, but it's definitely better. Hearing Tongrak and Mahasamut despite the harsh winds, and the lack of actors accidentally touching the microphone again made my ears so happy.

Certificate of Appreciation for Prettiest Kiss

Takara's Treasure (2024) - I've seen better and stronger kisses, but the way Takara kisses Taishin is just so beautiful. They are pretty kissers—visually pleasing lip-lockers. You can almost feel how soft their kiss is through the skin.

Certificate of Appreciation for Cutest Characters

I Hear the Sunspot (2024) - I really love watching Kouhei and Taichi individually the most. They interact with their environment delicately, full of care, understanding, and full of kindness. Both Kouhei and Taichi are very big characters, in my opinion, that's why the show somehow felt underwhelming, because I feel like there were so many unexplored and underexplored areas in their stories. I'm in dire need of a season 2.

Overall Best Show in 2024

Love for Love's Sake (2024) - I only have feelings about this show, not thoughts. The writing, cinematography, acting, chemistry, editing, and message won me over. It's one of those shows that you think about for so long after watching it. If I loved it any less, I might be able to talk about it more.

Watching in 2025

I literally got a iQIYI subscription for Your Sky. I'm also watching Perfect 10 Liners, because nobody told me it's so funny and cute!

I'm looking forward to Ticket to Heaven and Love You, Teacher this year. I hope they meet my expectations, because they both look so promising.

[sleeplessv0id]

Hi Zero!! I have three questions for you from my sleep deprived brain before I'm now finally going to bed:

Do you ever feel like you shouldn't make a piece of art/write something, because it's "too cliche" or "not artistic enough"?

Do you prefer to write really long sentences with lots of commas, or short sentences whenever possible (may depend upon genre)?

And do you have a neutral moment in your life that you think back to often?

(For example, I was at my friend's house once and I was talking about how I was always trying to make my assignments fun for me to write, and she asked me "Does everything have to be fun?", and for whatever reason, I think about that a lot.)

I like your blog, and I hope you have an amazing day :))

hello nemusnail! thank you for the ask, and welcome to my blog. It's fun interacting with others on here.

as for your questions!!

-

1. I have, and still do struggle with the following.

but think of it this way, you're reading fanfiction, and think of your favorite trope. slow burn? that's too vague. what if you wanted a college AU where your favorite ship first meet in the library. one a part-time librarian at work. when the other approaches them and asks where to locate a certain textbook. holding out their hand, they had the book code penned in ink on their palm. and it turns out the librarian was holding the book the other was in search of.

only to dig everywhere to find nothing of the like.

so, in truth, whether it be writing or other artistic mediums, there is no way to be, 'too cliche' or the like. because at the end of the day, you're creating for you. not for the public eye.

(unless you go about sharing your work).

I journal, and for years, and I mean years, I never wrote to the full extent of what I was feeling because what if someone read my journal? would they think I'm interesting enough?

so, at the end of the day, create for yourself. art is a reflection of the soul.

-

2. I tend to write really long sentences with lots of commas. but short can also hold a great deal of weight. I often use shorter sentences when I'm writing, say, a character pleading for their life.

truly does depend on the genre and what's happening in the scene.

-

3. I'm unsure if I am interpreting what you mean by 'neutral moment' wrongly. I'm thinking of it like, when someone says something to you that makes everything, even time, seemingly stop. not for others, but it stopped for you.

but this is what I thought of.

my past isn't the best. a lot of shit went down and still goes down to this day. but there was this one moment in particular.

on my page, you'd see I vent about various things. I had recently gotten out of a foster home, I had exposed the s@ all 3 of my cousins put me through and how manipulative my aunt is, my attempt to escape my house. all it is is reminders, and I can't heal if I'm constantly surrounded by reminders.

but that's not the moment. I was spending my first weekend back home up at my grandma mother's with my guy friend, who she took in as a foster cause he had nowhere and he turned 18 in just months.

I don't remember exactly how it all was cause I genuinely was losing it. but my grandma said something while talking to me, something about me having made up 'all those lies'.

fast forward through a breakdown, my grandma came into the living room, I was crying; obviously. and my guy friend was going off on her. she eventually turned her attention back to me and told me to look her in the eyes and say it was all true. she said something about how then she'll believe me.

I still can't believe I fell for that. 💀

I did as she said. she looked into my eyes and said she didn't believe me. there's more to it, but that was the moment I thought of. my love for her died that night, and I still vividly remember how this cool calm washed over me. It felt like I disconnected.

sorry if the last one is a little dark.. I easily misinterpret things, and this is the closest to what i thought a neutral moment.

[chaifootsteps]

Chai, what are some of your favourite stories. Books or movies, whichever you prefer. As a kid I read a lot and I noticed my preferred theme is Coming of Age.

Like my 5th grade class read Maniac Magee and I loved the book so much I stole it and took it home with me to finish, lol. The book focuses more on racism and growing up in a world divided and how kids are taught hate by adults. Maniac is an orphan kid so he never is taught the construct of racism. It also covered a lot of found family tropes and finding a place to belong.

My favourite romance coming of age novel is called Flipped where the book literally flips ever other chapter lol. The boy's pov is written one way and the girl's is written upside down to it. I actually really loved this book. Like, if I recall properly, the girl has a crush on the boy who is in his bootie phase or something. But as they get older he realizes how amazing and talented the girl is and, meanwhile, she doesn't really wait for him to grow up. By the time he comes around she's already interested in moving on. But I read it a very long time ago.

My absolute favourite has to be The Outsiders though. Fuck the author, Dally was the first character I read as queer coded. Like he really loves Johnny and the end of the story for them is so tragic. It's not in your face, probably because the author didn't intend for it, but they feel like a true queer teen pairing in the intolerant era of the 1950s and 60s America.

Hmm...I don't know that I have a favorite genre of fiction, although I used to ravenously consume entire textbooks full of short stories as a kid, then get in trouble for not following along with the class that was doing the finger-read-thing. It's how I discovered All Summer in a Day by Ray Bradbury.

I do lean towards fantasy as a whole. Got a love-hate relationship with Warrior Cats and Redwall, and a love-love relationship with Good Omens and the Silverwing trilogy. One of my favorite books of all time is The Dog Who Spoke With Gods, and I strongly recommend tissues for this one.

My favorite book when I was probably too young for it was A Clockwork Orange. Somewhere, there's a picture of middle school me dressed up as Alex for Halloween and posing with a glass of milk, stuffed codpiece and all.

[fabuloustrash05]

Shocked how no one sent you Ramona. So uhhh, ramona! (Bonus if you want but maybe renetengelo as well?)

MY OTP!! I love these two so much! As I mentioned with LeoLotus, I’m a sucker for the trope of guys falling for girls after she kicked his ass in a fight, and RaMona is the textbook example of it. How Raph fell in love with Mona is both hilarious and very in character for him. I love how understanding and trusting they are with each other, and I love how they have no shame in their relationship. They’re in love and are not ashamed to let the others know how much they love each other, as well as show off their love in front other their friends.

I love how Mona loves Raph for who he is regardless of his flaws and Raph not only loves her for the woman she is but also never degrades her or makes her seem like she less compared to him to help with his ego. She’s bigger, stronger and a better fighter than him and Raph is not ashamed of that. He’s proud that this incredible woman is his girlfriend.

Also you cannot tell me that these two would eventually get married and have a shit tone of kids in the future!

Adorable ship!! I love them! Honestly one of my favorite Mikey ships. Same thing with Kalangelo, I’m okay with this ship staying plantooc and not becoming canon, I love their dynamic regardless.

As much as I love Renetangelo, in truth I cannot see them becoming an official couple in their future. I HC that they dated for a while but eventually broke up because the long distance was hard (and confusing) for them, so they decided to stay friends but in their adult life they would occasionally get back together for. Ashley low roof of time when Renet would visit. I guess a friends with benefits type relationship?

[astralithium]

Hi! This is not a question, but I just want to say I absolutely love your fanfic, "Beyond the Final Frontier"! The writing is so immaculate, and is no doubt the best Mario and Sonic crossover fic I've ever read! I adore the characterization so much, along with the found family trope, which is one of my favorite parts of the fic, of course. And one of my other favorite parts is the way you write and portray Mareach. I just love how you write them to be so extremely in love with each other, with so much history together, yet they still aren't technically married yet because of the *many* trials and tribulations they faced lol. Not to mention the pacing, wording, and the way all the characters interact and them individually just flow so naturally. Like even something small like...

Okay, I remember you saying somewhere that Mario would try to change or reshape himself so he can reach Peach's standards. And I think in the latest chapter, Sonic walks in on him reading law textbooks, clearly unenthused, yet he's still putting what he believe she might see more of him than his own toleration.

Or just the fact that Sonic's trust in both Mario and Peach is a slow burn, yet not at the same time. He feels like he trusts easy, just because he doesn't know how it feels to be around new people who just want to care for him just because they want to; however, it's also clearly showcased that he's putting as much distance between his trust and Mario and Peach at the same time. Which both fit him fairly well. I loved all four of these characters before for different reasons, but the way you write them all just made me love them just a bit more. Imagine my delight when a fic with two of my favorite fandoms ever has such a sincere and heartwarming fic dedicated to them lol.

But anyway, try not to stress yourself with the other parts! Take as long as you need, as there is no need to rush <3. Have a good day\night\ or whatever else lol

Can I kiss you? Is that weird to ask? Like don’t get me wrong, no romantic intent here, I’m just so, so happy that you’re enjoying it so much!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to rush. I just thought I’d be done with 18-19 several weeks ago. But then I posted that very same Mario thought that you just referenced, and that became a huge factor in the chapters I’m currently writing, and, like the fic as a whole, it just got waaaaaaaaay out of hand. Do you know, I was only planning on writing ten chapters for this whole fic originally? Shows what I know.

I’m so happy you’re giving me an excuse to ramble about characterization. It’s been the HUGE motivating factor here, solely because I know that all of this *gestures to what I’ve been mentally referring to as the Toadstool family* has a huge chance of not working out. In this fic, it can, and I know how it will! But trying to sum it up in a sentence or two just feels wrong. Cause, like, how do you tie Sonic down? How do you give him the mom, the dad, and the white picket fence, and somehow make it feel right? Like it’s not a betrayal of the life he loves and the freedom he fights so hard to keep? Like they’re just trying to support him, to not clip his wings, and just let him fly knowing he’s loved?

Those are the hoops I’ve been trying to jump through writing this fic.

But somehow, it’s working. And I’m still working, too. Even though I’ve hit a wall, it’s finally crumbling, and even the dreaded nineteen’s slowly going down.

Thanks for letting me ramble. And thanks so much for your lovely comment! You’ve truly made my night!!!

[shrinkthisviolet]

character ask game 2, 3, 4, 5, 15, 16, 23, 24, 25 (sorry there's so many lol) for Mr. Eddie Thawne <3333

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

He and Iris are sweet together! And he is, in general, very sweet—befriending Barry even tho he suspects that Barry and Iris are in love (and keeps being proven right)?? How could I not admire him for that omg

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

I didn’t like him keeping Barry’s identity a secret from Iris, but…I mostly blame the writers for that one tbh. The sexism strikes again 😒

EDIT: I completely forgot s9 existed, apparently 🤦‍♀️ THAT is definitely the worst thing they did to him, hands down. They ruined his character…and for WHAT, the arc wasn’t even good!!

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

Eddie gives me Disney Prince/knight in shining armor vibes. A fairytale epic would be perfect for him 🥰

(Or a pirate setting, like this wonderful Westhallen fic 👀)

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

As strange as it might sound, “Cave In” by Owl City. I think Eddie, for all his optimism, does struggle with self-worth—we know he had a hard time making friends as a kid, especially given his dad’s job, and given that he was originally from Keystone…this is more speculation, but I doubt he and his dad were particularly close either (especially if his dad is the sort of person Eowells would like).

And in “Cave In”, there are multiple instances of the narrator/singer struggling with inner turmoil, depressive thoughts (“please take a long hard look through your textbook, ‘cause I’m history”…which also ties in tragically to Eddie’s ultimate fate of dying heroically at the end of s1) and yet trying to be optimistic despite it (“if the bombs go off, the sun will still be shining, because I’ve heard it said that every mushroom cloud has a silver lining”). It’s very Eddie-like imo 💞

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

Westhallen wins for me, hands down. Eddie is great with both of them individually too, but like…all three of them = the superior ship

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Admittedly I don’t really read a ton of Eddie fics, so idk many ships for him 😅 I guess Eddie x Caitlin? Not a bad pairing per se, and I’m the last person to complain about shipping characters who have never properly met onscreen (Reyrose (I haven’t read the comics where they interact) and Franmaya are two of my favorite ships, after all)…I just don’t get that vibe from Eddie and Caitlin. But also, I think that ship only has a few fics anyway, so 🤷‍♀️

23. Favorite picture of this character?

I don’t really have one tbh but he looks so lovely he smiles, so I present you with:

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

Jim Paxton from the MCU! Scott Lang’s wife, Maggie, remarried when she and Scott divorced, and Jim is just an absolute gem. A great husband to Maggie, a great friend to Scott, and a great stepdad to Cassie. They’re such a wonderful family, all four of them, and I love them so much 🥰

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

I gotta be honest man, I was suspicious of him. Idk if I thought he was the RF, but I definitely thought he was gonna turn out to be a bad boyfriend because of how that trope usually goes, and that would be the impetus for Westallen getting together. Imagine my shock when that didn’t happen!! When, in fact, he befriended Barry, Westhawne was going strong for a while, and died a hero!!

(I would’ve preferred that he not die, ofc, but on the other hand…I don’t trust the Flash writers that much. They would’ve ruined him for drama, I can just feel it)

character ask game!

[thebreakfastgenie]

🍈🫐🍍 for the fruit writer ask game !! Love your works btw :-)

🍈 Who’s your blorbo and what are some of your favorite headcanons/ideas about them that repeatedly show up in your fics? Free pass to rant about blorbo opinions.

My current active blorbo is Hawkeye Pierce and this is one of those questions that is such a good question and as soon as someone asks my mind just goes blank!! I suppose..... you could say dying and being dead, but that's only one published fic so far, the other two are WIPs (and he survives one of them in the end; it's a time loop). I can't say for sure all of these come up in my published fics, but they are always informing my writing and may be used in WIPs you haven't seen yet. Being born in 1922 and going to Bowdoin are canon to me, to those are always going to turn up. I have a lot of ideas about his background in Maine and I reference a lot of local Maine details because I know and love Maine. He had the childhood diseases early, because his dad brought them home from work. He was a precocious kid who read his dad's medical textbooks. I think he read a lot of novels and poetry his mom had, too. He was kind of an odd kid, but still popular--a class clown. After his mom died, he started helping out more at home because it was just him and dad, so he learned how to take care of himself younger than most boys did at the time. His family was financially secure, so during the Depression they weren't at risk of starving or losing their home, but things were still lean. He was a tiny kid until he was twelve or thirteen when he stayed skinny but got tall overnight. Once puberty hit he started attracting and enjoying attention from girls. I do feel very strongly about who he is but it's surprisingly hard to articulate. I think he kind of walks a cliff-edge with his mental health, even before we meet him (that comes up in the Hamlet fic). I think he just says stuff a lot of the time but he's being honest, just not entirely literal. He doesn't sleep well or enough--that one is a bit of projection, too.

My other blorbo, who I'm not actively writing right now but will again in the future, is Josh Lyman. I draw on his secular Jewish background a lot, because I share it, and New England too because I have strong ties to this region. His loyalty to his friends is my favorite character trait and I like digging into that with regards to his various relationships. I write a lot about his stubbornness and determination, too. His sister Joanie was significantly older--seven or eight years--which may be because his parents had trouble having children in between them. He's always affected by being shot, though he gets better at dealing with it. This comes up a lot in my fics because so many of them are about that trauma. I think Josh is misunderstood in-universe and I like exploring the dissonance between who he really is and his public image (that he helps to cultivate).

🫐 What’s your favorite underrated thing in your fandom? (A ship that only you seem to write for, a character there’s almost no fics about, a trope that criminally hasn’t been written yet, etc.)

The first thing that comes to mind is just gen fic. Case fic, too. Missing episode type stuff!! Just... more of the show. I also want more sick fic but not like cute somebody takes care of someone with a cold sick fic... a little angstier than that, I guess. Plotty fic, please!!! MASH gives so many interesting story opportunities and I want them all! Definitely more of the original cast, too. More character development for Henry and Trapper, since they didn't get a ton of it on the show. I wish there was more Hawkeye/Margaret too because I have kind of particular taste in that.

In West Wing fandom I am always desperate for fic about Josh and CJ, Josh and Toby, or Josh and Leo. Those dynamics compel me more than anything. Also, 1998 Bartlet for America era!!!

🍍 What kind of AUs do you like? Are there any AUs you hate or just generally have beef with?

I love canon divergence so much. AUs that stay pretty close to the source, but change one significant thing are sooo interesting. I love me some major character death AUs. Full on AUs can be fun, but I usually like them more as posts or conversations with friends. It depends on the fandom a lot too, but MASH and The West Wing are both such specific and delicious premises that I don't usually want an AU. It's also hard to imagine those characters in an AU, because their jobs are so integral to who they are. It's hard to imagine a Josh Lyman who doesn't work in politics, or a Hawkeye Pierce who isn't a doctor. That being said, a well-written AU can be really fun! I hate superhero AUs. I've just never encountered one I actually liked. Maybe my mind could be changed. I hate soulmate AUs because I have beef with the entire concept. I'm not a big fan of magic/fantasy AUs, especially if they involve extensive worldbuilding.

[furiousofpanda]

A LITTLE ABOUT ME!!!

18 • Demisexual • Genderfluid • INTP-A

Hello! I am Wake, your local shapeshifter and jester harboring immortality at it's finest.

I go by any pronouns besides feminine aligned ones (she/her/etc) and I'm somewhat okay with neopronouns as long as you aren't being weird about it.

Because my sexuality and gender are under huge umbrellas, I jokingly use umbrella terms or similar at times (non-binary "non-biney", Trans, Asexual, Gay, Lesbian, Saffic) I'm still figuring out what to alighn with for what I'm attracted to but lets just say... Women

My internet Mascot and Sona is Wake, who is a hyperfix of mine

My favorite games are Portal 2, Bioshock (1&2 only), Stanley Parable and Viva Piñata: Party Animals

I love older or more obscure games that were once popular but I don't watch any television at all or read any books, if I watch TV it's anime or a cartoon series pfft

Particularly 8-bit rpg's, old Xbox 360 games or Friend sims (dating Sim style gamed where you can't or don't have to romance the/a character)

I am part of the closed species fandom. By textbook definition I am a furry and I have a fursuit + draw furry art, but I do not interact and am oftenly severely disconnected to the fandom. If anything the fandoms I interact the most with unironically have been the tf2 and Undertale Fandom even though I'm way too jaded and not all that interested into Undertale anymore.

My username is the same on all platforms, though if your unsure if a platform is actually me, feel free to message me, it's a really long list of how many websites I have accounts on.

My favorite Genres are Horror, Surrealism, Action/Adventure, RPG/Simulators, and whatever genre ENA and Yumi Nikki fit into

I do also like some games for their characters despite not liking their tropes, for example John Doe (from John Doe game) has kinda occupied the back of my mind despite hating the yandere trope and having been stalked before n the trama from it

He's a special kind of cluelessly wholesome aight? I can't describe it :/

I own several original species listed below, some I made, some I've gotten ownership of over time, I'll make posts on them eventually

All except Spinks and nakimi are open species

Nakimi and Spinks are "open" meaning you can make em without asking but they need to be approved by me to make sure they follow anatomy.

Spinks

Nakimi

Ucheraros

Quoins

Feirnix imps (Fluffy imps)

And a few more that are still in development

I ran out of image space but I also have 200+ ocs and about 152 or so on my sales account over on toyhouse! Same user ofc

So yeah I'm chill, this is me, howdy I exist.

I don't judge people unless they do something outrageous stupid that isn't funny, so feel free to message me whatever, I need friends y'know-

[concrete-the-cat]

oh i binged 16 episodes yesterday night until 3 am and finished it

i'm not sure if i'm just apathetic but it didn't hit me too hard, especially with how a plot device was essentially thrown in to kill spoilers you know who randomly & anticlimactically to get him out of the way

still one of my favorite characters though considering the general accidental apathy and the fact he's a lamplight from like the 1800s so he's been there longer than he thinks he has

my dislike of the waterfall is also ironic because that's just a textbook Chekov's Gun which is my favorite plot device in the history of writing ever

the attempted murder was great though that worked well and showed off both the breaking point of 'human'ity and the forgiveness of 'human'ity

main problem - one of only three, which is a REALLY good score trust me - i think i had was i didn't know it was different at the beginning

like i said in some other post, imagine playing ddlc before any other dating sim and assuming they're all like that - that's what happened to me with one because i didn't know object shows were SUPPOSED to be innocent

like okay you plucked a bunch of people from their lives and they're rebelling, you're probably killing them when they get eliminated because evil secret horror villain but only the villain knows. okay sure

and then you realize that's WILDLY different than the norm and technically something you had an idea for (see: eclipse's wonderful academy, a failed academy rp on the wof wiki which was going to pull a One and terrify everyone by not giving them the expected format) and oopsy daisy you just missed out on the biggest you-style twist ever

second was magazine? criminally underrated and bullied and canonically she does not live super super far from me on a map so. great lakes power

that is all

third was yeah. i get a lot of people moved on from 'eh that was sort of a lackluster ending' but considering i just finished i haven't

to me there are certain shows where 'leave ties open in order to let the viewer decide what happens' works and on the other hand 'close all the ties down and let the viewer write au fanfiction if they want' works. i just think one would've been better not self titled tbh. like sure there were a whole bunch of things that the viewer could decide but like what about bryce (second favorite character by the way, always like to see The Logical One tropes survive since they're the most relatable to me) and his past??? viewer can't decide the past. we're left to assume he grows up in an abusive household - super honestly the most almost tearful i got due to personal reasons - and he's got a - sister? - and that's about all

one was good though overall, even with what i said. plenty of W plot twists that even a person thinking it's the normal object show trope would be surprised by so thanks for the recommendation

i'm still having my mom react to it for content and personal reasons

make sure to read tags for extra thoughts

@concrete-the-cat how's ONE going? Has the ending left you an empty shell of a human yet

[tetsvhoe]

ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL SOMEONE CATCHES FEELINGS

character/s: terushima yuuji x f reader

genre/s: suggestive, angst to fluff

warning/s: fwb. mature themes. not for minors.

gwen's notes 🤍: one of my favorite tropes but i kinda don't like how this turned out also my brain is dry why do i keep ending my fics like this n e way this blog is run by a terushima apologist i am so sorry

MASTERLIST | TAGLIST

you have known terushima most of your teenage years. as popular as he was in high school, he was hard not to know. he made johzenji seem smaller than it actually was. he was always around the corner, an arm's reach but you never dared to get closer until your paths crossed again in college. admittedly, he was hot. he was also repulsive but charming at the same time which you deemed impressive of him.

"i know you," he announced, stalking up to where you were sitting next to the window, alone with your thoughts. the sly smirk he always wore on his face seemed to suit him better than you recalled.

you offered a tight lipped smile in return. "terushima right?" you didn't expect him to remember, let alone notice you. not like you were vying to get his attention in the first place.

the way your name rolled off his pierced tongue paired with his boyish smile had you floored for a split second.

"do you have somewhere to be?" he asked as he gathered his things and stuffed it in his backpack.

"not really," you shook your head no as you curtly replied.

"good, let's grab something to eat i know a good place not far from here."

he grabbed your hand which you yanked away to cross your arms above your chest. an eyebrow raised you challenged, "don't you have somewhere to be, terushima?"

hearing you call his name twice in a row had him faltering and he didn't understand why.

"yeah, about to get lunch with a pretty girl."

you held back a smile which ached in your cheeks. "ask me nicely and i'll think about it." you took two strides towards him, making a mental note that this was the closest you'd been with him and that you were much more bold than you usually were.

"would you maybe want to grab some lunch with me, pretty girl?" he tried again, clearing his throat. he smirked down at your meticulous gaze.

you rolled your eyes, walking past him. "i guess i could spare you the time of day."

"for the record," you mumbled cheeks stuffed, legs propped over his dashboard, "this isn't a date."

"bold of you to assume i was asking you out on a date in the first place" he teased, cheeks as stuffed as yours.

"whatever i just wanted free food," you joked making him throw a piece of tissue in poor retaliation.

"this isn't free venmo me my money back, you freeloader."

you let out a lighthearted laugh, wondering how and why it was so easy for you to get along with him. you guessed it was part of his infamous irresistible charm.

"y'know, you're not as dumb as you make it seem." you commented out of nowhere as your head hung upside down from the edge of his bed. there was an attempt to study for finals.

he glanced at you from where he sat, legs sprawled disgracefully over his gaming chair. "is that supposed to be a compliment?"

you rolled over to your stomach, facing him. "no i'm calling you out for being a pick me boy."

he frowned, throwing the nearest thing he could grab which happened to be a dirty sock lying around. shrieking, you threw your 2-inch thick textbook at him and called it quits.

he grabbed the edge of his bed frame to wheel himself closer to you. you strained to keep your head up looking at him otherwise you would end up face to face with his–

he gently grazed his knuckles over your cheek, his touch feathery light against your skin. "sometimes the smartest thing you could do is to play dumb."

terushima never would have thought that you would use his own advice against him; the way you played dumb against his advances. you pretended not to notice the yearning kisses he seared onto your skin. you played dumb to the way he'd flip you over and stare into your eyes with such intensity as he plowed deep inside you. he'd hold your hand in his, pausing to leave gentle loving kisses along your knuckles and wrist, your thighs and calves. you complained against him leaving hickeys higher and higher along your neck, like you didn't know his motives for it. you pretended not to notice how he'd find more and more reasons for you to stay over longer than you used to–"do you want to watch a movie?", "did you eat yet? we should order take out.", "you seem tired, wanna cuddle? or you could always stay the night if you want." you ignored how he touched you, soft and careful, even when you're doing mundane things and not at each other's throats in his bed. you laughed off the quiet compliments he'd give, staring at you with sincerity and vulnerability he swore he doesn't show to anyone else. you reasoned to yourself that when he kissed the parts of you you told him you hated, it was all a mere coincidence. you weren't dumb though. you were afraid. because there was always a reason why you had kept a safe distance from him in the first place.

you were afraid that acknowledging these things meant speaking it into existence–your feelings for him which you promised you wouldn't have before you both started fucking around.

"you're so beautiful," he mumbled in awe, more to himself than to anybody else.

you frowned at him as you popped your head out of his hoodie, your hair a disheveled mess, your lips swollen, eyes glazed over. there were dark circles under your eyes from trying and failing to cram the semester. your skin riddled with little red spots without makeup to buff them out. his clothes did close to nothing for your figure. and terushima thought you were beautiful.

"you're so beautiful," he repeated, louder this time.

tears brimmed your eyes for reasons you didn't understand yourself. his dazed smile was replaced with worry as he caught a glimpse of your distraught features.

"stop that."

"i mean it," he pleaded, trying to reach for you, to hold your hands and kiss it gingerly, to hold you in his arms and stroke your hair. but you didn't let him.

you quickly stood up, not meaning for the tears to fall down your cheeks. "stop it seriously is everything just a goddamn game to you!?" you started to gather your stuff in a panicked haze, but he was quick to jump off the bed and seize your trembling hands.

"no, of course not i mean it i really do i–"

he tried searching your eyes for some kind of sign but you refused to look at him, especially in this state.

"yuuji i know damn well that you know what you do to me," you sobbed, voice cracking and arms falling limp on your sides.

his fingers lifted up your chin, making you look up at him. you stubbornly avert your eyes until it eventually felt like he was burning a hole through you.

"well then let's stop whatever this is between us."

your lips trembled, but before another sob climbed its way up your throat, he added, "i don't want this. i want you. all of you. i like you so much sometimes it feels like your driving me crazy, fuck." he threw his head back, a bitter chuckle resounding from his throat.

"i'm scared, yuuji. i don't want to like you like this."

"well too bad because it sure seems you like me a lot." he sighed as you fell silent again, wrapping his arms around you tightly.

"i understand why you're scared. and we might have done things out of order, but i like you and i want to give us a try. if... if you let me, if that's what you want."

[flowerandthesongstress]

Psst. Hey. You. Yes, you, the person who plans on doing NaNoWriMo. Clean your place today if you still haven't. You won't regret it. Do it. DO IT.

Right, so for the next month, or however long it takes me to scribble 50k words, I'll try my best to avoid distractions and not post anything lengthy here. Maybe just some funny screenshots or something.

But before I start on the exercise in self-compassion that is NaNoWriMo, I wanted to say a few words about what you miGhT hAvE guESsed is my favorite TV-show. Not just because ‘I won't have time later’, but because the thing I've been writing for the last 11 months, the thing I beat the last NaNoWriMo with, and am intending to repeat the trick, is as Harmon-esque as I could manage, in ways so convolutedly — and sometimes idiotically — metafiction that I can't even begin to describe. But as long as it helps me process stuff, right? Anyway, I owe this to my favorite auteur, and I owe this to Community. ❤️

I am not a fan, I am not a groupie, I am an academic © 

I’ve seen people write fanfiction, theorize about the plot and the setting, ship characters, i.e. treat this show in a normal way, as a TV show. A regular story about a bunch of characters. These people are within their rights, of course, go ahead and perceive in any way you wish, not everyone’s brain is set into overthinking mode 100% of the time, duh-doy. 

But I can’t. I’m only capable of perceiving Community as a TV show about TV shows (and more). To my eyes, it’s not a story about characters, it’s a story about stories. About media of all types, about writing and storytelling and structure and tropes, about how fictional narratives shape our lives and our thinking; for me personally, writing fanfiction about the immediate archetypes involved in it, for instance, would be like writing fanfiction of a narratology textbook. Ridiculous and makes no sense. These people don't exist, can't exist, their world doesn't bend to the narrative, the narrative IS their world, a brechtian student play; they and their 'stories' are illustrations on the pages of a manual that teaches contemporary storytelling of the westerner variety.

Which is to say: to me, Community is a work of NONfiction. It’s entertaining and witty nonfiction, and at times it's GENIUS nonfiction, yes, but Community is Not Real in any way; a page-turner study that provides the viewer (me) with brilliant and memorable examples as the viewer learns. Community is what that dumb motherfucker Campbell wishes he could have been (I fucking hate you, you racist dipshit, wish I could resurrect you and then kill you a hundred times for the damage you have done).

In general, Community is not the playful or heavy-handed sort of meta we’re used to these days, the type that rewards you for understanding references and then goes on to give you exactly what you expected. Community sends a deconstructor fleet after everything within its reach, it challenges and sometimes even punishes the viewer for their preconceived notions and for blindly submitting to them. 😈 But... not only.

See, I bought into (what I now think of as) the charade at first, just binging the show in an idle manner — what am I saying, if it hadn’t started out the way it does, tricking everyone into thinking that they’re watching another run-of-the-mill sitcom, this time about a bunch of goofs in a community college, I bet Harmon would have never gotten the project greenlit; plus, in hindsight, the show needed to build its own comprehensive mythology — but I squinted pretty soon, when the show itself started to call me out. For instance, when Shirley addressed the whole ‘two attractive white people are bound to get together, that’s how it always goes’ situation, and I found myself thinking: huh, I am expecting that to happen, I am absentmindedly ‘shipping’ those two, but why, which outside influence had led me to this absentminded compliance? And just look at what the show did with my trained expectations, how brilliantly it called me out. I applauded and I wheezed. 

When the shift in perception happened, I couldn’t undo it. Finally registering that the show's theme was a cheerful song about SUICIDAL IDEATION made me go 'oh...right. I thought I smelled you, old buddy'. But the realization was made that much stranger by how it also clashed with the honesty of the irony I was witnessing. I felt encouraged and supported, not merely mocked, I felt comforted and inspired, not laughed at, and my hand was held, not slapped away.

I was like: hmmm waaaaait a second, this...isn't muh 'old buddy' postmodernism, this is something uuuuh...beyond? What...is...THIS?

Community was how I discovered metamodernism. The encroaching ironesty of our age. The morning after getting smugly high and drunk on postmodernism, the morning of having to face a new day with a horrendous headache and paralyzed legs. The prompt update brought on by ‘okay but if we stick to just poking and mocking our own stories i.e. ourselves, we might as well fucking kill ourselves right now, so could we please come up with something not as depressing?' The soft refusal to hate oneself or to see only doom and gloom in everything.

Moreover: Community taught me the English language, so it ended up being more than one textbook for me. Although 'nerdview' was a word I learned much later.

As I was watching for the first time, trying to pace myself (quiet fart on fourth...the unfortunate proof that yes, auteur theory does apply sometimes), I re-read several works of nonfiction that had been my holy tomes in uni and beyond — litcrit, comparative mythology, creative writing. But I was also spending hours on the TV tropes website, absorbing and re-absorbing, and looking up articles and essays, and just generally, all jokes aside, watching the show as an academic would (look how Community predicted and lampshaded this, too, and even mocked me a little, with Professor Sheffield!) 

I, too, was raised by TV, but not the American TV, and I guess the fact that I grew up watching mostly different media, just added to my interest.

Sidenote: now I can quote Community in my sleep. That's how well I know my favorite textbook.

And I still think that the epilogue was perfect in every way. It called me out, it challenged my perception one last time for the road, it asked if I really wanted from my media what I’d been taught to want, and it offered me to engage in the ultimate introspection regarding stories, and learn to compromise, and remember that real life is real life and fiction is fiction, and neither owe me happy endings, and that comfort, closure, and acceptance are instead to be found within me — and then *I* hugged my teacher goodbye, twice, one for a gripping course, one for what the course had taught me, and my teacher left to teach someone else. 

That’s why I said I worship Abed. To me Abed is not a character per se, and not even (not just) a raisonneur; in the confines of this piece of media he’s a mechanism, he’s a book spine, he’s a table of contents, he’s the narrative that holds within itself every narrative that’s ever existed, guiding you through the learning process.  

Right, that’s it, I love kettle corn and Community, Community is a fun time show. 😁

Imma go vacuum some more.

Good luck if you're doing Nano, too.

[transpat]

pat moments where he acts as if he fell straight out of a bollywood movie pt. 2

like. we know pat didn't like ink during this phase, he's just projecting his feelings for pran on to her, which makes this scene so funny bc. this is pat probably having his slow mo, windy, romantic moment, and thinking this is how the hero would look at the heroine bc he's a clown like that.

(it's also smth deeper about pat being accustomed to acting a certain way he isn't bc of his father's influence like: hating pran, picking fights, flirting openly w girls, playing rugby. he's used to doing this to the point where he genuinely believes its him and not his father. but that illusion is shattered soon after this so. phew. ming's son is icy pat, but pat is warm. loving pat broke the cycle of hate pran was stuck in where he hated himself for the lies he crafted for his mother. loving pat taught him to love himself. that same way, loving pran was a journey of self-discovery for pat. loving pran helped him break out of the mold his father forced him into.)

not a bollywood movie necessarily but he definitely got this one from a drama. some bad popular romcom that cishet women like and requires u to kill critical thinking to watch.

bc men change when they find the 'right girl'. lol pat must have genuinely wanted a dreamy cishet romcom romance and actively played the role of a male lead thru out his relationship w ink (and possibly w other girls). when he realizes he's not het, he stops confining himself to gender roles and takes on any act he found romantic.

brother nearly killed me from second hand embarrassment here, but. why are all his flirting tactics so filmy?

holding pran's gaze for a moment after telling korn he's had enough today to say 'this is for you.' is such a textbook bollywood hero moment please fnsfls

this!! this moment is the culmination of his playing-pran's-male-lead career. idk how he was expecting this all to play out w wai right there like. he was trying to show wai he was more important to pran w/o considering pran's feelings at all like a true bollywood hero!

jag soona soona lage moment.

i saw this and immediately thought of shah rukh khan. like. i don't even remember if he's ever had a moment where he's done this but its such an srk move that's the only thing i can think about when i watch this scene, that's why its one of my favorites. its such a movie trope, and that p'aof used it here makes me so happy, like every lgbt kid w a penchant for romance must have wanted to see those same romances w characters we could identify w and p'aof did that. every silly, popular trope from asian cinema he's included that and my love and respect for him ballooned. (btw. tu jaane na would be a perfect soundtrack for this arc.)

prev | next

[comicaurora]

How much have your characters evolved since their original versions? What were their original versions like? Are there any characteristics or arcs that you had to toss for narrative purposes but still miss?

Oh my god. Dare I plumb the embarrassing depths of everyone's earliest drafts?

Reminder that I started playing with this concept when I was eleven. Everyone started off very generic, because at the time I was just having fun playing out the tropes I liked. I had a lot of edgier concepts, too, more vent stuff - and a lot of unexamined tropes from the broader space of fantasy I later decided were boring, gross or broadly unnecessary. I think exploring that would boil down to "character was edgy and flat, now they are not" which doesn't sound very interesting.

However, it is interesting to me how the characters have changed since I started releasing the comic. I expected things to change during the drafting and development process - I was more blindsided by the organic development as I wrote the actual thing.

Kendal's character has remained fairly consistent, though he's gotten more serious in the eleven days he's been alive - a reasonable reaction to all the everything, I think. The part I wasn't originally planning was the exploration of his complete lack of self-awareness in the most literal sense. "Self-sacrificing hero type" is one thing, but he really doesn't think of himself as having value beyond what he can do for other people. I don't wanna spoil, but I'm positively giddy at how that arc is shaping up in the stuff I'm currently boarding. After that, we're in uncharted waters.

Alinua started off totally chill, took a major dive into Dark And Sad territory when I first came up with the concept of the chimeric plague, and is now in a strangely liminal space where her general personality is relentlessly positive but she's floating on this bottomless abyss of eldritch horror. I had plans for how I was going to explore that, but what surprised me was her caution about it. It makes sense - she's had a life of her own for a week and a half, she's not going to want to jeopardize it by diving headfirst into the full implications of her power and existence. She feels like this situation is far too fragile, which means while a lot of the reveals are happening faster than I expected (my original plan had the "Life's Vessel" reveal way down the line) she's playing it pretty close to the chest.

Erin hasn't actually changed that much, but his narrative pacing has shifted somewhat. The void dragon is a textbook Superpowered Evil Side, but since I can't risk overusing it, it's more of a back-pocket thing that only rears its head rarely. His arc is less about it than I originally expected. As we build up to it I think I'll be able to play with it more, but pacing it out has been tricky.

Falst has changed simultaneously a lot and very little. His basic concept has remained consistent from the first draft onward. He's cranky, confrontational, angsty, fiercely loyal but too emotionally constipated to express it, all my favorites. Writing him is like putting together an ice cream sundae. No matter what I add, I'm gonna get something I like out of it. If anything, the only surprise is I haven't leveraged the angst much yet. After his intro mini-arc we've been pretty solidly in the fluff zone as far as I'm concerned. Sometimes I worry I'm being too nice to these guys…

Tess hasn't changed, but her role in the story has. I'm still mulling over some directions for that. I originally hadn't worked out 100% of how this arc was going to wrap up, and looping Tess into it (with the storm connection) was a comparatively late addition.

The Dragon is a really basic character, so he hasn't really changed, but The Collector has shifted from one villain archetype to another. In my original version, she was a very stock coldly-calculating-type evil sorcerer. She was also a guy, although that's much less relevant. Broadly, the big change was giving her an actual personality. Unfortunately, since she's waaaaaay outside of our heroes' current challenge rating, it might be a while before I can loop her back in, but when I do, I think she'll have some interesting dynamics I didn't anticipate.

Dainix is still changing for me. I've had his core character for ages, but his personality has been slipping around like whoa. Earliest draft had him much angrier overall, middle draft made him a generic-enough paragon even I was finding him boring, and before I'd boarded his intro I'd slipped into a weird little middle ground where he was lacking any overarching themes. Eventually what I hit on was weirdly simple, but has been working so far: Dainix is emotional in a way the other characters aren't. He doesn't suppress or sanitize his feelings, he's the character who visibly and audibly reacts whenever he's feeling a certain way. And I definitely didn't realize that "completely honest" was such a rare character trait in my cast! I need to get him and Falst in a room together asap, the conflict is going to be incredible.

[fandomsonrequests]

tv trope

fandom: be more chill

characters: michael mell

reader: gn! 

word count: 1.5k+

summary:  To him, you were the walking definition of those television tropes of the denim-clad, badass person who practically oozes confidence. The people wanted to date or be with you when they got to know you. And he was whipped. Like so whipped, not even Jeremy’s pining over Christine matched up to it. And that alone is saying something. 

a/n: AHHHHH i love Michael mell (and george salazar cos why the hell not) so much ;^; he’s such a dork i just wanna hug him

Michael Mell always thought you were so cool— like The Matrix kind of cool. You weren’t really popular but you had a reputation around the school for being this tough kid who always stood up for themselves and didn’t take any shit being thrown at them. And, when circumstances permit it, you rode your freaking motorcycle to school. Not only that, you didn’t really flaunt anything off and spoke up when you needed to.

To him, you were the walking definition of those television tropes of the denim-clad, badass person who practically oozes confidence. The people wanted to date or be with you when they got to know you. 

And he was whipped. Like so whipped, not even Jeremy’s pining over Christine matched up to it. And that alone is saying something. 

But at the same time, he was scared. He wanted to talk to you so badly, to get to know you past the television trope he saw you as. He wanted to get to know you for you. And he probably would’ve done so already if all his insecurities and anxious thoughts wouldn’t come crashing down against him like a violent wave. 

For example, in Chemistry class. You were situated in the seat right in front of him and when Mrs. Clarke requested the students to pick a partner for the lab activity, Michael hesitated in reaching out towards you. His heart was all in for it but his head was telling him otherwise. 

What if they could smell the weed on you? What if they find your Pac-Man pin collection on your bag childish? What if they think you’re weird? What if they don’t like you? 

The poor boy would retract his hand and shrivel away as he watches you get whisked away by one of his other classmates. Now he understood what Jeremy felt before he got with Christine— talking to your crush was much easier said than done. 

And the cycle repeats daily. He works up the courage, getting some hype from his best bud, which slowly crumbles the second he comes within a five feet radius from you. He turns on his heel and runs away back to his locker, scolding himself for chickening out.

But fate was getting tired of this beating around the bush and decided to take matters in its own hands. 

Michael decided to go to the library to pick up some books he needed for school while he waited for Christine and Jeremy to finish up with drama. So imagine his surprise when he saw you in the corner of the library in the “reading nook”, a very familiar comic in your hands. His favorite video game had released a few issues of their new comic, a spin-off to the main plot in the game. Of course, he bought all of them— out of impulse— and was already halfway through the first half of the series. So when he spotted the bright cover of the comic amongst the warm, monotone colors of the library, he couldn’t help but be intrigued. 

Before he knew it, his feet were dragging him towards you. He took note of the faded Mötley Crüe shirt you wore along with a pair of acid-washed ripped jeans and your scuffed sneakers. A pair of earbuds were plugged into your ears, your head bopping along to whatever music you were listening to as you read your comic. 

He fiddles with the frayed sleeves of his red hoodie covered in those iron-on patches, thoughts of what he was going to say to you running through his head. He eventually ended up just backing out and settling with pining for you from afar but his movement had caught your attention, making you look up from your comic book.

Michael freezes up as his nerves took over him- eyes wide behind his dark-rimmed glasses. You quirk a curious brow, plucking out one of your earbuds before offering a small smile. “Hey Mell,” You greet cooly. “What’s up?”

You knew his name??? 

“Wh- wha- wait you know me??” The boy stammers as he nervously meets your gaze. 

You let out a soft chuckle and he couldn’t help but fall in love with the sound. “Yeah, you’re in a few of my classes. Of course I’d know you.” You uncross your legs and close your comic book to entertain him. 

“Oh, wow.. Uhm, it just seems l-like, uhm,” Michael continued, voice shaky while his hands grew clammy. “It, I mean you, you just s-seem like the type to not r-really know others.” 

You nod in understanding at his defense. “It’s the vibes I give off isn’t it?” You sigh and shake your head. You look up at him again and scoot over to the other side of the couch situated in the reading nook to offer him some space to sit on. “Well, I hope you believe me when I say that I’m not really scary.” 

He looks over to space you had made from him and back to you before going back to the space. It goes on for a couple of moments before he decides to sit down- but on the opposite side of the couch. You two say nothing for a while, just observing one another before you speak up again.

“Anyway, is there anything you need?” You tilt your head curiously, the small smile returning to your lips. 

“Ah, no not really,” Michael admitted and scratches the back of his head. “I just saw that you were reading Apocalypse of The Damned: The Laboratorium and I kinda just… gravitated towards you.”

Your smile morphs into a bright grin and the speckled boy decided right there and then, there was nothing brighter than that rare, million-dollar-smile of yours. “You know Apocalypse of The Damned?” You ask excitedly and clutch the comic book to your chest. 

“Like the back of my hand,” He replies as confidence starts to flood his system. “I practically bought the whole series.” 

Your hands fly to your mouth to muffle your excitement, shifting in your spot to look at him properly. “Have you finished it?”

“Halfway through it. But don’t worry, I’ll try not to give out any spoilers.” 

You let out some kind of excited squawk, red coating your cheeks at how stupid you sounded. This was definitely something Michael hadn’t expected. He expected you to be cold, aloof, maybe even a bit grouchy like Jade from Victorious but your personality was quite the opposite. And he couldn’t help but grow more enamored by that. 

“I wish I had friends that geeked out with me about these kinds of things,” You huff after your small laughing fit. “They always make fun of me for it.”

“What?? Are they crazy? They’re assholes for doing that to you.” 

“No, no. They aren’t really mean but they think it’s too dorky.”

“Well,” He motioned to you. “They’re clearly missing out on things.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at that, bashfully looking down at your hands while toying with the loose end of your earbuds. You nibble at the inside of your cheek before piping up again. “You’re pretty cool, Mell. We should hang out more often.”

Michael’s jaw almost drops at that. Not only did you invite him to hang out with you, but you had actually found him interesting. That you didn’t find him or any of his quirks weird. It was such an elating feeling, one that spurred his confidence even more.

“Does this weekend sound okay for you? We could go out, grab some sushi and maybe binge read the comics together at the old drive-in.” He offers, a bit sheepish, and you nod beaming from ear to ear. 

“Sounds great,” You fish out your phone and hand it over to him. “If you don’t mind, can I get your number? So we can coordinate this whole… I guess date later in the week.” 

Michael’s face turns a deep shade of red and you couldn’t help but giggle at that, your own cheeks flushing the same color. He was so damn adorable, you wondered why you hadn’t spoken to him sooner. He types in his number and hands you back your phone, smiling uncontrollably at what was happening. 

You glance down at the time on your device, seeing that you had to go home soon. “Well, I better head out. Keep in touch will you?”

“Y-yeah, roger that.” 

You stood up and gathered your things, turning back to him as you flashed him one last smile. “I’ll see you around, Mell.” 

He waved goodbye as you walked to the exit for the library, the lovestruck expression never leaving his face. He sighs dreamily, knowing full well that if his friends saw him now they’d tease him for being so whipped for you. He didn’t mind though because at least, he had something to look forward to this weekend.

Michael gave himself a mental pat on the shoulder for working up the courage to get to know the real you as he picked up the textbooks he needed. At least he knew now that you weren’t some tv trope but someone so much more. 

[stayndays]

𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 - 𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧

my gift to @wingkkun for @kafenetwork‘s holiday treats event!

genres & tropes - fluff, minor angst, comedy, misunderstanding(!!!), magical boarding school au (hogwarts but not really), dorm neighbors au, best friends to lovers au, shy!chan, extroverted!reader, gender neutral reader, chan’s pov

disclaimer - the entire fic is based around the fact that the reader was kinda accidentally drugged with a potion, two swear words, chan likes an unnamed female character (but hey in this case he likes everybody!!)

word count - 5.1k (uhm?? what the fuck?? this is coming from the blurb writer guys what the hell happened)

summary - bang chan does not have a crush on you. actually, he has a crush on his partner in potions class, and decides to do something about it… until it goes all wrong, and the liquid of a love potion is running down your throat. now, chan has to deal with your lovesick antics for a week while trying not to become infatuated with you himself. spoiler alert: it’s a lot harder than it looks.

a/n - it is i, penguin anon, the dude who made that survey for stayblr writers, a friend of your own friends, yes hi lol KJFSKDF honestly, this could be a very confusing fic to some people, as some things don’t line up, i will admit that! that’s mainly because i frantically put this together in the last two weeks while preparing for midterm exams, so not all the ideas i had in mind lined up correctly. regardless, i hope you enjoy this, especially you kai ^^ 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐳𝐞𝐫𝐨, 𝐚 𝐟𝐞𝐰 𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞

Bang Chan does not have a crush on you.

You’re his best friend, his next door dorm neighbor at the boarding school he goes to. He comes to you for one subject, while you come to him for another. You’re the person he sits next to at lunch, and the counterpart to his timid personality. You are anything but his crush.

He does, however, have a crush on the cute girl he’s partners with in potions class, aka, not you.

“So,” you start off, tapping your feet repetitively on the wooden floor of Chan’s dormitory, the chair you’re sitting on face away from the desk it accompanies. “Let me get this straight.”

Chan nods for you to continue, playing with the blanket threads on his bed to anxiously wait for your response.

“You’re going to make a love potion for your crush to drink?” you confirm with him, to which he nods, lips pressed together tightly. Chan can easily tell how flabbergasted you are at his simple, yet elaborate idea, wheels turning in your head. “But this could go wrong in so many ways! How are you going to get her to drink it anyways? How are you even going to get the ingredients to make the potion?”

Chan scratches the back of his ear, which is slowly growing red by the second. A nervous grin slowly growing on his face before he answers you. “You see... that’s where you come in.”

He notices the deadpan on his best friend’s face and winces.

“...You want me to steal the ingredients, don’t you?”

Chan nods timidly.

It’s not Chan’s fault really, Chan believes, as you’re known for being a master at being sneaky. Not only can his own clumsy hands barely lift up a pencil before dropping it onto the ground, he has to be a role model to the younger students! It’s only right for you to do the job instead.

“Fine!” you throw your hands up into the air in exaggeration. “What do I get in return, though?”

“Hmm...” Chan ponders on your question, tapping his chin in thought. “Banana milk for a week?”

“Pleasure doing business with you, sir.”

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲 

Bang Chan has made a huge mistake. It’s the kind of mistake that’ll affect his entire school year, undoubtedly. The kind of mistake that he’ll scream out at 2 am into his pillow, not only because it’s highly embarrassing, but also because it could ruin everything.

It all starts with a carton of banana milk.

The plan, originally, was quite simple. Chan had seen his crush fold open a carton of banana milk in class and gulp it down right in front of his eyes. Well, while he pretended to be busy looking up something in his textbook, at least. By gifting her banana milk, that was actually drained out and replaced with the love potion he brewed, not only would he seem like a nice person to her, she would be infatuated with love for him. 

Two birds hit with one stone. Simple as that.

Until you came in, strolling down the hallway Chan was leaning his back on, eyeing the pastel yellow carton in his hands. He knows that his first period is potions class, he knows that you greet him every morning with that same smile on your face while he waits outside for the classroom doors to open. However, he should’ve known that openly holding a container of banana milk in his hands for everybody passing through the hallway to see was not a good idea.

And that’s how Chan ended up where he is right now.

“Hey, Chan!” You approach him with a grin, hair thrown back messily. “First of many banana milks you got for me there?”

Chan’s breath gets caught in your throat while you look up at him expectedly. His eyes continue to shift over from the paperboard box in his right hand to your bold eyes.

“Um- Er- I-” His fingers curl tighter around the drink, but his voice just so happens to fail him out of all the times in the world.

And then his head fails him, and he nods out of pressure.

He watches your eyes light up, and your hands lightly touching his own as you snatch the drink from his possession.

You rip open the opening to the carton. Pressing your lips against the entrance, you pour the drink into your mouth and down your throat, all in one go, right in front of Chan. His mouth is slightly agape at your bold actions, his head screaming at him to tell you what you just did in hopes that you’ll snap out of it before it’s too late, yet he stays silent.

“Hmm, the liquid is more like water than milk, but at least it still tastes like banana!” You gently crush the carton before patting Chan on the shoulder. His eyes widen when you pause, and then laugh in a dazed manner. It’s almost as if he can see the hearts forming in your eyes.

“Thank you, Channie. See you at lunch!” You wave him off in a flirtatious manner, something he’s never seen you do to anybody in all the years he’s known you, and his heart pounds faster with worry.

Soon enough, he falls out of his stunned trance and presses his back against the wall shamefully, slowly sliding down it. He’s too anxious to care about the weird stares he’s getting from other students going down the hallway, curling himself up into a ball.

“WhydidIdothatwhydidIdothatwhydidIdothatwhydidIdothat-”

“Chan?”

Chan’s head shoots up from his position on the ground, only to lock eyes with his crush’s worried eyes. He gasps quietly before rocketing up from the floor, brushing himself off, startling his crush. “Y-Yes?”

“Why were you slumped down on the floor like that?” He watches her scanning his face while he bunches up the sweater he’s wearing with his hands. “Your face is really red too… should I take you to the nurse’s office?”

“Oh! Uhm, no, it’s okay. I feel fine. Class is starting in a minute, regardless,” Chan reassures her, and fortunately to him, she doesn’t question it any further and changes the subject of their conversation.

Yet, his back of his mind sends him flying back to what happened previously. The flashbacks of you drinking that love potion right in front of his eyes sends a pit down his stomach, churning it to make him feel sick and lightheaded. He ponders about how much he screwed up this time, thanks to his stupid brain and timid decisions.

That love potion you drank was not meant for you.

You are not his crush.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐨, 𝐭𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲 

Bang Chan is a fool, a dunce, the embodiment of stupidity.

At least, according to his two closest friends besides you: Lee Minho and Seo Changbin.

“You’re such an idiot, Chan!” Minho cackles as he bangs his fist repeatedly on the wooden table of the school’s dining hall, accidentally sending his hot chocolate flying all over the place as he flinches.

“I have to agree with Minho on this one,” Changbin, who’s passive behavior is the opposite of Minho’s wild personality, tells the oldest boy. “You really messed up on this one.” He continues to flip through the pages of his textbook after cleaning up Minho’s mess with his wand.

Chan groans, letting himself fall onto the table pathetically, head first. He covers his eyes with his hands and shouts in agony, making Minho laugh even harder. Eventually, once the rowdy student calms down, he shakes Chan’s shoulder to get him to sit back up again. “No, but seriously, what are you gonna do now? They’ll be completely obsessed with you for the next couple of days.”

“A week, actually,” Changbin corrects, flipping to a specific page of his potions textbook and displaying it to the two. “A love potion's lasting effects depend on the amount you give the drinker.”

“And a milk carton holds like, a liter of liquid? So if you multiply those numbers, it’ll for sure last an entire week, which started yesterday,” Minho points out with his finger, directing Chan’s eyes to the info on the page. 

Chan lets out a deep exhale, scratching his scalp as he processed the information. “So, do any of you have advice for what I’m supposed to do?”

“Don’t look at me-”

“I know, Changbin, you’re too focused on your studies to find a partner. I’m mainly asking Minho, our designated player in our year.”

“Well,” Minho cracks his knuckles before answering. “I’ve never accidentally drugged somebody with a love potion before, so unfortunately you’re all on your own. Fortunately, however, Y/N’s coming right your way!” Minho points cheekily to behind Chan, making him whip his head around.

And there you are, walking right towards them.

“Channie!” you stroll on over to the trio of boys with a pep in your step and a grin on your face. “Let’s go to Insanis!”

Chan’s ears perk up at the name of his favorite cafe near campus, always serving the best scones and cinnamon rolls he’s ever had, and the fact that you know his love for the place. However, he comes back to the realization that you’re under the effects of a love potion, so he shakes off the blush that’s threatening to appear on his cheeks.

Slowly starting to feel under pressure at the fact that you’re waiting for his response, he nods his head repeatedly with a shrug, packing up his belongings spread out on the slightly dirty, wooden surface. Your face lights up at his agreement, and you eagerly wait for him to stand up. Chan waves off his two friends, ignoring Minho’s snarky smile and Changbin’s desire to laugh right then and there, and exits the dining hall with you holding his hand.

You’re going to be hard to deal with these next few days, he thinks.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞, 𝐰𝐞𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan thinks you’re going crazy.

You’re acting like a drunk person whenever you see him, completely helpless of your own mind. Then again, you’re the one who drank the love potion a couple days ago.

He just didn’t realize how strong of a potion it was.

“Channie!!” you holler out to him from behind, crunching snow beneath your feet as you try and keep up with his pace. “Let’s go into the snow! Come on!”

He turns around to your grinning face, eyes drifting over to the bobble on the beanie you’re wearing that’s covered in snow. You point excitedly to the thick snow next to the outdoor path you two were walking along. “But we have astronomy class in half an hour, and I have to meet up with my potions classmate during that time, remember?” Chan objects, giving you an uncertain look.

You whine dramatically with a pout, stomping to him and grabbing his wooly coat, yanking him with you. “It’ll just be for five minutes!” Leading him off the pathway, the two of you entered the snow covered grass field. Chan shakes his head at your childish, yet heartfelt actions, watching you turn back and fall onto the snow back first without hesitation. 

“You know I’ll get sick if I-”

“You’re underestimating my healing skills, Bang. Now get in the snow and freeze your ass off with me,” you point to the snow below you, slowly feelings your fingers become numb despite the knitted gloves you’re wearing.

Chan breathes out a laugh at your desperate attempt to get him to join you, shaking his head as he finally accepts your offer. Unlike you, he slowly sits on the ground at first and then lies down on his back hesitantly. The cold feeling of the ice on his back makes him shiver, and you giggle at his reaction while making a snow angel. 

The two of you stay like that for a few minutes, taking in the sudden silence of the campus grounds and the snow falling on each other’s faces. Chan’s body is as stiff as a board by now, but he endures it for the sake of your enjoyment. That is, until he finally decides to get up after checking the analog watch on his wrist.

“Hey! Do we really have to go now?” you yell at him with wide eyes, making Chan roll his own.

“Yes, Y/N,” he pulls you up from the snow, turning you around so he can brush off the snow sticking onto your back. “Now I have to meet my classmate in just a few minutes.” 

“Why her?” you whine once more. “Do you like her more than me?”

Your sudden question makes Chan pause for a few seconds, before shaking off the feeling of his heartbeat slowly gaining speed. “D- Don’t worry about it. Now let’s go.”

“Hey! Answer my question!” 

You realize that not even Chan knows the answer to your question.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫, 𝐭𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan is a shy person when it comes to affection.

This day, however, he realizes that you are the exact opposite of him.

You and him have a routine every Thursday where you’d come into his dormitory at 7 O’ clock sharp to study until his brain was filled with herbs and spices he has to memorize for his gardening elective. It’s not his fault he didn’t get into the magical musics class like he wanted to, and got stuck with becoming a botanist instead. You, on the other hand, usually had trouble with your spells class, always pronouncing the Latin words slightly off. The two of you would study until it’s pitch dark outside, and then Chan would walk you back to your own room.

However, Chan already anticipated how this study session would be different.

He flinches slightly when he hears a set of knocks on his door already, checking the clock on his studying desk. Chan shakes his head out of disbelief, and opens the door without even checking the peephole.

“Y/N, you’re ten minutes early, why are you-“

“Chan!” Your face lights up and wraps your arms tightly around Chan’s torso, catching the boy off guard. “I missed you.”

“You- You saw me yesterday though,” Chan tries to tell you, checking the hallways just in case other students were around to possibly witness this. “and the day before, and the day after that, and-”

“Yeah, yeah, but even if I don’t see you for a couple hours, I still miss you,” you admit with a sudden, shy tone, burying your face into his chest. Chan feels himself flare up at your actions, catching him off guard. Not once have you ever expressed affection like this towards him, always settling for high fives and fist bumps, possibly even a side hug if you’re feeling nice. 

“Just uh, come in. I heard from my potions classmate that our upcoming quiz for spells is quite hard,” Chan makes you let go of the hug against your will, and awkwardly guides you inside of his dorm. 

“Ahh, why do you always mention her?” You question him with curiosity flowing through your voice, sitting down on his bed casually and tossing your schoolwork next to you. Meanwhile, Chan goes back to his spot on his desk chair. “It’s like you’re obsessed with her.”

Chan’s ears flare up at your remark, but at the same time, he fights the urge to call you out on your antics for the past few days. Thinking about it, it definitely wouldn’t do any good for you, and you needed his help for your upcoming quiz. “Nothing you need to worry about, Y/N.”

“But-”

“Let’s get to studying,” he urges for you to start with him, to which you roll your eyes at, but place your textbook in your lap regardless. Chan smiles softly at your willingness, and gets to work as well.

Typically, the statement “study until it’s dark outside” applies for at least three fourths of the year, especially since you two tend to stay on campus for the summer simply because you both liked the area. However, once winter rolls around and the snow starts falling, the sun is up for a lot less time, sometimes even disappearing by dinner. Chan knows this well, so the two of you instead set a timer for two hours and pray that you won’t get distracted by each other’s antics.

What Chan did forget is how jumbled up you get once the sun goes down.

“I’m already sleepy...” you mumble out behind Chan’s back, rubbing your eyes with your index fingers. 

Chan scratches his head, contemplating his next move. To be fair, it’s quite difficult to get a love sick person to do what you want, even if you’re the person they’re in love with. “But Y/N, we’ve only been studying for an hour and a half.” He decides to move his stuff to his bed to join you, his joints already becoming stiff from sitting on such an uncomfortable chair.

“Yeah but I’ve had a long day-” you lean over so you can rest your head on Chan’s shoulder. “Even though I wanna spend more time with you, I kinda just wanna sleep...”

Chan freezes up, cursing you for being so sleepy at times like these, cursing you for being so affectionate towards him these past few days, cursing you for being so-

“Fine, you can sleep.”

You smile with a daze, closing your eyes. Mumbling a small thanks of gratitude, it’s the last words Chan hears you say before you drift off. Chan finds himself not being able to focus with the weight on his shoulder, twirling the pencil in his hand back and forth. He lets out a sigh, at last realizing how he’ll never get another word written down in his situation, and uses his wand to place his work away and close the light. Pulling up a spare blanket for the both of you to share, he finally closes his eyes as well.

Until Chan realizes that if his crush did the exact same gesture to him, he wouldn’t treat her nearly as well as he did for you.

You don’t know that, though.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞, 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐲

Bang Chan is not good with love. 

If it hasn’t already been clear enough. Although he’s had quite a few crushes in his teenage life, including the one he has right now, he’s never had the confidence to confess or god forbid ask somebody on a date.

So why not ask the person who’s under the spell of a love potion for advice?

Sure, it’s a far stretch, even Minho agrees, but maybe, just maybe, Chan could get something good out of this week.

He catches you off guard one day, bright and early before class, while the two of you were heading to your locker. 

“Hey Y/N,” Chan asks you out of the blue while waving through classmates left and right. Thinking about it, it was a miracle that nobody was talking about Chan’s mishap and spreading it around. “Would you consider yourself... good at love?”

He watches you almost choke on your own spit with a worried look. You turn to him after clearing your throat with an almost offended expression on your face. “Why are you asking?”

“Well, uh, I wanna try confess to somebody..”

“What?! Who? Tell me,” you blurt out without a second thought, staring at his side profile with wide eyes. “Is it your potions classmate?”

Chan is quick to notice the gazes of your fellow classmates after you raise your voice, motioning for you to keep it down. “It’s nothing for you to worry about! I just need some advice on how to do it, you know?”

“Hmm, well...” you take a pause to think, resisting the urge to pout. “You realize you’re asking somebody who’s never confessed either, right?”

“Still, you’re more.. extroverted? Than me, so you must know more than me,” Chan shrugs, feeling his neck grow hot while he tries to explain to you why he asking you, not anybody else, without telling you the actual reason.

Your shoulders slump down in defeat, “Fine. Just- uh- ask them on a date first? If you just confess straight away, you’re most likely to be rejected because they may not like you,” you explain to him, your voice getting shakier and more quiet as time goes on. “At least if you ask them out first, they can start to like you at the date.”

“Okay.. I can do that,” Chan scratches his red ears, already feeling the queasiness in his stomach just at the thought of being rejected. “Right? Hopefully? Probably?”

You simply hum in response, looking down when Chan turns his head to get a look at you. He holds his breath out of instinct, afraid of a sudden outburst coming from you, but nothing comes. Most likely, Chan thinks, you’re more than upset because you’re not the one he’s confessing to.

It’s a poor idea, and was a poor idea in the first place.

You’re jealous, and Chan can tell.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐱, 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan tends to forget instructions.

So when he’s left out in the snow after his crush rejects him, your words from the previous day only then come back to him.

“I’m sorry,” his crush frowns once the words leave her mouth. “I don’t see you the same way.” She shakes her head, and Chan’s shoulders slump down as she turns her heel to walk away.

The feeling Chan experiences is neither his heart shattering into a billion pieces, nor the emotion of relief. It’s in between those two, for a reason Chan can’t figure out straight away.

It’s somehow not heartbreak, yet Chan still wants answers.

“Oh, uhm, one last question,” Chan perks up at the last second, his crush whipping around at the last second. “Why? Why do you not like me?”

His crush stares at him for a few moments, lips slightly apart. Then she laughs.

“It’s because of Y/N.”

“Y/N?”

“I can tell you both like each other. This week, I’ve noticed that your friend has been acting different, and although I saw that you were kind of uncomfortable with it at first, I could see you warming up to it,” she smiles. “Chan, you and Y/N have something that I will never have with you, it’s a given. I hope you come to realize that, if you haven’t already.” She nods one last time, bidding farewell to Chan for the day, and drifts farther and farther until Chan can’t see her anymore.

Later that night, when Chan reflects on his crush’s explanations, staring at the ceiling, he wonders if it would’ve been different if he listened to you more carefully. Maybe he should’ve slowed down, and instead of practically shouting at his crush that he likes her, he should’ve spoken more properly and asked her out on a date like what you said. Maybe then, he’d take her to Insanis, which happens to be his cafe of choice that you and him go to almost every week. And maybe, him and his crush would play in the snow and make snow angels happily, like how you two did a couple days ago...

No. Chan’s crush is right.

His head’s thoughts are slowly being all about you.

You, on the other hand, believe that you’ve lost him.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧, 𝐬𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲

Chan loves you. 

No matter how hard he tries to diminish his feelings for you that has grown in the only the past few days, he can’t stop himself.

From your happiness when playing in the snow, to the way you become cuddly when the moon comes up, to the explanation his own crush gave him. 

It all lines up.

“Dumbass,” Changbin speaks up bluntly when Chan reveals his realization to his two guy friends while walking to the dining hall for breakfast. Minho laughs in response as Chan rolls his eyes.

“I gotta admit,” Minho swings his arms around the two, bringing them in closely. “You only just realize now? It’s impressive how dense you are.”

“Dense? Am I really?” 

“Yes,” Changbin and Minho both say at the same time, and for once, Chan can only laugh. The trio approaches the dining table, while Chan scans the room standing up for your familiar face.

Minho, takes notice of this fairly quickly, “So, what’s your next move? It’s still a gamble, though.”

“Hmm? How come?” Chan genuinely asks his friend.

“Did you fall in love with the Y/N you’ve known this entire time, or only the Y/N you’ve seen this past week?” 

Minho’s question makes Chan silent for quite some time, sitting down slowly on the dining benches. His two friends patiently wait for his answer, Changbin in particular already digging into his breakfast when Chan finally responds.

“I think I’ve always liked them, I just never realized it.”

To Chan’s utter surprise, they both nod their heads in agreement. Changbin swallows the food in his mouth before commenting. “I think you’re right. Maybe you just had that crush on your potions classmate to state that you and Y/N are  just friends to everybody, without even meaning it yourself.”

Minho elaborates further, “And she said that you and Y/N have something between the two of you that’s unique? Then she must’ve implied that you guys have this bond that makes you two inseparable.”

Chan simply hums, taking in the information. He’s glad to know that he’s right for once, finally having a plan on what to do next. He sighs in relief, grabbing the nearest plate of food and stacking it onto his own plate, digging in. Yet, Chan still wonders where you were that morning, and how he only saw you later in the day hanging out with your other group of friends. Not even talking to him once.

You simply weren’t sure anymore.

𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭, 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲 

Chan has not seen you for the entire day.

It’s supposed to be the day that the potion wears off from your body, and you can finally go back to your normal self (despite Chan’s wishes), but Chan has yet to see you. Not once at the dining hall, or the hallway potion’s class is in, or even with your other group of friends who join you in history class. 

Fortunately, though, he’s able to overhear your dorm roommate, who says that you’ve refused to go to class today for reasons they don’t know. So Chan takes matters into his own hands, considering that nothing eventful ever happens in herbology class on Mondays, he decides to skip the period to head to your dorm room and approach you, with the help of your roommate giving him a spare key to enter.

The moment Chan walks into your room, a sudden chill goes down his spine, most likely because of the cold air. The lights are closed, with only the morning sun’s brightness seeping through the cracks of the window. The curtains that hang over your bunk bed, as you sleep on the bottom, are blocking his view from where you are. He closes the door gently, but makes sure he’s loud enough to alert you that he’s there. Peeking through the curtains, he sees your body covered in heaps of blankets, smushing your face into your head pillow.

“Hey,” Chan takes a seat at the foot of your bed, taking in your mellow appearance. “Are you okay? Are you sick?”

It takes you a minute to answer, and Chan starts to wonder if you’re actually awake right now, until you speak up. 

“It’s not like you to skip class, Channie,” you choose to say instead of answering his questions. You appear from your spot in your pillow, gazing up at him with a tired look on your face. “What’s that in your hands?”

“Oh, it’s- uh- banana milk. It’s for you,” Chan extends the hand he’s holding the drink out for you to take, but you don’t budge. 

“Are you sure that one doesn’t have a love potion in it instead of milk?”

Chan gets taken aback at your sudden theory. “You knew it was a love potion?”

“I could tell, even through the effects of it,” you state, finally sitting up and gently taking the milk from his hands. “Don’t feel bad though, since you’re here, I might as well tell you something.”

“During that entire week of being under that spell, I learned that-” you pause briefly. “If you already love somebody, your love for them basically strengthens by ten. It becomes something unstoppable, and you start to unravel your feelings for that person instead of hiding them. Originally, I wanted to kept those feelings inside of me forever, but because I accidentally drank that potion, look where I am now. Have you caught on yet?”

Chan could only stare at you, even after putting the puzzle pieces together. You tense up at his reaction, only fearing the worst to come out of this.

His next words surprise the both of you, however.

“That’s the best side of you, though,” Chan admits without a second thought, and you have to do a double take to see if your best friend, known for being shy and timid, really said that.

“C-Care to elaborate?” you stutter out through your shock, a light tint of red spreading throughout Chan’s body.

“The best side of you is the one you showed me last week. The one where you let your guard down instead of keeping up your confident persona,” Chan explains hesitantly and slowly, gripping his fingers tightly with each sentence. Then, he suddenly smiles, then grins, something you rarely ever see coming from him. 

“That’s the side I fell in love with.”

“Love?!”

“Mhm.”

“Really? You’re not playing with me right?”

“Mhm!”

You groan loudly once it finally hits you, pressing your forehead against his shoulder. Chan starts giggling at your reaction, the both of you finally feeling at peace with one another. It’s as if all the awkwardness and tension from the last week drifted away slowly, with Chan’s now ex-crush leaving his field of vision, only for you to come in at the right time. He wonders how Minho and Changbin will react once he reveals that he finally got into a relationship, and how the rest of the school year will pan out with you by his side.

“So,” Chan starts to snicker uncontrollably. “You really are infatuated with me, huh?”

“Ya, Bang Chan! That’s the first time you’ve ever teased me. Ever!” your eyes widen in utter surprise, punching his arm slightly as Chan laughs harder, you joining him soon after. You nudge him one last time, coming up with something to make him as equally flustered as you are right now.

“But doesn’t that mean you’re infatuated with me too?”

@skzwriternet​ @stayracha-net​ pls reblog my fic for once i beg u