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tinfoil-jones · 22 hours ago

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Jerk Ford AU: The Worst Timeline

Out of all the scenarios and alternate timelines / other AU's this one could cross over into or adopt elements from (You can see a Reverse Portal Scenario Here and Here), the worst and most destructive alternate timeline for Jerk Ford would be Drifting Stars.

If you don't know, Drifting Stars is a popular AU where during the events of Not What He Seems, Mabel goes through the portal instead of Ford coming out. And now Mabel and Ford are together in the multiverse.

Stanley never stopped being involved with family because he was never kicked out, so Mabel and Dipper have actually known their Grunkle Stan their whole lives, they've even visited him a fair few times and stayed over, the summer that the events of the show takes place in is just the first time they stayed for an entire summer.

Imagine if, about five years before the show starts, little 7-8 year old Mabel falls into the bottomless pit and somehow gets ejected to the only other thing out in the multiverse with the same dimensional signature as her; Jerk Ford, her great uncle who has been missing for twenty five years.

Jerk Ford sees this crying little kid and he takes pause because, for one thing what is a kid doing in Mystery Flesh Pit National Park in the Body Horror Dimension, and another thing why does she have an eerie resemblance to his nephew, who was only ten years old the last time that he saw him?

Jerk Ford at first was considering leaving her to the lost and found at the tourist outpost of the national park, but then she called him "Grunkle Stan." (Because she is mistaking him for Stanley, and Grunkle why did you cut your hair?) And it's all over.

Jerk Ford, a multidimensional space hobo vagabond who has been trying to get home for the past twenty five years at this point and has had absolutely no contact with his family for obvious reasons, he just goes YOINK THIS IS MINE NOW.

And why is this the worst timeline for the Jerk Ford AU?

You know that scene in the Lion King when Rafiki is holding up Simba to the valley? Well, imagine Jerk Ford doing the same thing with Mabel. Except she's like this:

Because Jerk Ford already has poor impulse control when it comes to pettiness without his brother to reign him in, and now he has Mabel who is a very similar brand of unhinged as he is, they're just subjecting the entire multiverse to a path of glittery destruction the likes have which have never been seen before and will hopefully never be repeated.

Jerk Ford was already wilding all on his own now he has Mabel who has so many ideas. And she has this pathetic, lonely man wrapped around her little finger.

Also, Jerk Ford is a known runner. He does not fight if he doesn't see himself winning, and he'll usually go out of his way to not kill people. He just lacks the trigger-happy 'shoot now journal about it later'-gene that most Fords have. (He has very specific exceptions)*

But in a scenario where he has Mabel? Where he isn't facing consequences all by himself? He isn't letting anything in the multiverse so much as breathe rudely in her direction. So now, he isn't just some jerk or mostly harmless nuisance, he is stacking bodies (not in Mabel's line of sight, obviously).

The (Jerk) Ford Hate Club is besides themselves. Now, stopping or killing Jerk Ford isn't their only prerogative, they also need to 'rescue' this small, innocent child from The Worst Ford and his influence. Unaware that the terrible-flavoured beanboozled jellybeans that keep making their way into their catering were all her idea.

When Jerk Ford and Mabel return in 2012, Dipper is besides himself because, sweet Moses his sister is alive! She's really alive!

But she's been with with The Author who he hates, and being raised by him for the past five years has had obvious effects on her development.

She's still happy go lucky and nice, she's not a jerk at all like her Grunkle Ford.

But she's basically a supervillain who is on the FBI's Most Wanted List in every dimension she's been to that has one, and some organizations both official and criminal consider her a bigger threat than Jerk Ford (relative to body size).

Her sunny disposition did not change at all; she's blowing up whole buildings with a damn smile on her face

It's terrifying. This is the worst Jerk Ford timeline.

*While he was in the multiverse, instead of celebrating Jewish holidays the traditional way there was no point without his family, he would travel to different parallel Earth dimensions to kill Nazi’s. He would try to be a little more traditional, and halt the killing spree while he had Mabel with him, she was too young for murder.

#Jerk Ford AU #Jerk Ford #stanford pines #ford pines #grunkle ford #mabel pines #mason pines #dipper pines #consider for a minute that this man is horrible but also family oriented #and has not had any family for almost thirty years #he wouldn't fight for himself #he's not a fighter #but when the chips are down and you think you're harming any of his family #no you arent #not while hes breathing #gravity falls #gravity falls au #I imagine she wears a hoodie instead of sweaters just like Jerk Ford #But its an advanced futuristic hoodie that she can change the colour and logo settings on

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symphonyofsilence · 5 months ago

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Let the poor man rest.

#also no he doesn't want to experience life as a normal person. no he wouldn't sacrifice his powers to live again.#he LOVED being powerful. he was very proud of his powers. he was at the top of the world. what he disliked was being so lonely at the top.#which having reunited with Geto now he is not.#and he wanted to keep the next generation safe due to his past regrets and teach a generation of kids to be at the top together.#and he wanted to get rid of the corrupt higher-ups and reform the Jujutsu society.#and he did all of that. Yuta and Yuuji are both alive and safe and the kids are all reunited with each other stronger than ever #and the higher-ups are d**d.#Gojo obviously wouldn't hate to keep living. he clearly didn't expect to lose and die. but as he himself confirmed #he died doing what he loved. he went out the way he wanted. he went out with a bang. he had the best fight of his life and gave it his all.#as he said 'he had fun'. he said it would have been embarrassing if he died of old age or sickness.#and now that he's gone he's happy with his friends and especially Geto. he found peace.#He said it himself 'Now i'm wishing that it's not just a dream'.#also for those of you who say that Geto & Gojo wouldn't be together because one would go to hell and one to heaven... no. just no.#first of all. Gojo did a mass m*r*** before his death #second of all. they're Buddhists. they don't have heaven and hell. don't bring Abrahamic religions into everything.#and you'd be surprised by the excuses the Abrahamic religions find to not let people in heaven.#probably Gojo wouldn't go to heaven even if he didn't kill the higher-ups due to...idk... occasionaly doing pranks or sth.#but Gege apparently created a whole other afterlife of his own. and Toji Geto Gojo Nanami and everyone were all gathered there together.#you SAW that. so stop.#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #jjk gojo #gege akutami #my two cents #satosugu

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ruporas · 8 months ago

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need to exist in your warmth (id in alt)

#vashwood #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #blood tw #ruporas art #love u when i get to cuddle u and love u when i get to feel ur blood soak into my hands #being this close to one another means the eternal suffering of trying to separate love and mission. love for one and love for humanity #i like to think of pre-vol8 vash as someone who struggles with his feelings for ww bc as equal and as trusted he is -#vash knows his responsibilities and he knows/expects ww wouldn't let him stray from it either. for that he can't take to any romantic incli #and i think itd make him view ww in a stricter non-personal way... If that makes ANY sense.#for ww - take someone who youv gotten close to and ended up liking more than you expected #someone who has a belief and follows it stubbornly - someone who'll get into more fights and trouble more than youv had your entire life #ww thinks of him as a monster but he knows theres a limit he himself can take - i feel like hes considered what might be the limit for vash #for Safety measures. just in case. yknow. whenever he himself might have to load the bullet < him hyping himself up as if he could do it #my point being that the thought of vash being dead crosses his mind more than he'd like. i think its a simultaneous dread drop in his stoma #for failure of the mission - but also an Ok? They can be killed? and also a disastrous gunning of his own heart. considering how much they #both live in their own heads some days are Just the worst ever for them in each others company. but also they lov each other :[ sooo much

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somegrumpynerd · 8 months ago

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He's so normal

#UTDR #UTMV #Killer Sans #Saw this tweet and it reminded me of my hc for Killer #Which is that he hates being on his own for too long #He's fine amusing himself for a little while and even a bit longer with the cats as a distraction #But if he woke up in the castle and nobody else was there #It wouldn't take very long before he started getting worked up and destructive #This is part of why Nightmare got Dust #Not only because he and Killer were now outnumbered as the Stars had come together #But because any time he was gone for too long he would come back to find Killer had gone a little bit feral in the castle #And since they were so similar in circumstance he thought Dust would be a good match #Both in fighting ability and in keeping Killer company #And he was so right! They got on like a house on fire and nothing ever went wrong credits roll #(Just kidding he would be dealing with the aftermath of this decision for months)#Anyway be sure to get your henchmen in pairs so they don't get lonely

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serpentface · 5 months ago

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This was going to be a panel of a little comic but I got too invested in drawing minute background details so, here.

#They are having an argument over 1) whether crops can be grown on the moons 2) what - if any - impact does this have on the feasibility #of an afterlife being located on the moons #Brakul is a partial convert to the Imperial Wardi faith but this mostly entails having adopted the seven faced God (and some #other elements of the belief system) into his worldview and participating in expected rites while retaining his central #ancestor veneration practices completely unchanged and mostly prioritized.#This doesn't actually cause much friction in of itself with the big exception being disagreements on the afterlife #Wardi practices surrounding death prioritize proper handling of the corpse and funerary rites in order to get the dead where they #need to be- death is a fraught transition from one state to another. analogous to birth. The role of the living is to get the dead through #this transition (preventing them from being stuck earthbound as earthbound ghosts - which is the Bad afterlife). Once the dead #make it to the moons that's it. They don't really interact with the living. There's plenty of conceptualization of what it's Like #in the lunar lands but the cultural priority is not even slightly on the Logistics of existence there.#Whereas the CORE of religious practice among the Hill Tribes is ancestor veneration - ancestors remain interactive with the living #and require/desire their continual support. They are conceptualized as having earthlike 'lives' where they eat and drink #and grow crops and herd livestock and they need the support of the living (in prayers and offerings) to do so prosperously.#There is a HIGH cultural priority on the logistics of their afterlife and it's self-apparent that the world of the dead needs fertile earth #to support them.#So like bottom line Brakul thinks there's no goddamn way that the moons could support an afterlife (they are described as #barren rock that was flung into the sky during creation and certainly Look that way)#and that the Wardi are just wrong about their afterlife's location. They probably go to the celestial fields (which are located #behind the moons and stars) like everyone else #And Janeys finds this aggravating and doesn't see his fucking point but has developed a nagging concern that Brakul Could be #partly right in that the celestial fields could Maybe exist in addition to the lunar lands.#So like maybe they aren't going to go to the same place when they die?#He's already terrified that he'll be stuck as an earthbound ghost and really doesn't want to be even further separated so #he figures he should make sure he gets himself dead and cremated at the same time as Brakul so they can navigate the #transitional period together.#Brakul is unconcerned because he figures that if Janeys actually does get stuck on those barren ass moons he can just kinda #Go Get Him #Ancestor spirits fly to the earth all the time and the moons would be a much shorter distance. Probably wouldn't be an issue.#Long story short these disagreements and underlying anxieties result in fights over whether you can grow corn on the moons or nah

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thebonesinmy-closet · 3 months ago

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Mark and Rex should make out, and Mark should totally wreck Rex's face doing so, and Rex should let him. a tender kiss to Mark, when filled with passion and pent up energy, feelings like a vicious bite to Rex, but he's not quick to point that out. Mark should kiss Rex till it hurts and Rex should dig his nails into Mark's back, barely managing to break skin, even Mark says it's ok. Rex should try and match the speed and strength at which Mark is capable of defiling him, but ultimately fail — he could never dream of catching up to a Viltrumite. Rex should tell Mark he doesn't have to be gentle.

both have always had to be careful, but they can rip each other apart and welcome it. they've endured so much pain, why not find a way to enjoy it?

Mark should hold Rex tenderly with arms that could crush him, and Rex should relish in feeling secure. they should tangle their legs together and mingle their breaths and push each other against walls and mattresses and pillows. friction and heat building between them. moments where they stare at each other as Rex pants for breath and Mark waits for him to catch his breath with a look so patient it hurts they pant for breath, and there's the pull to be tender that feels slightly foreign but also so very good and right. their foreheads come to rest against each other at some point.

they talk about their insecurities. about the shit no one else wants to hear or knows what to do with. Rex covers Mark's hands with his own so he can't see the blood that isn't there. Mark takes hold of Rex's when they shake with a tremor that will never fully go away.

they aren't perfect. but they're something good. just for now.

#welcome to the delulu folks #Mark is the “he does what he's told” type of guy. and if he's not told to do something. he's just gonna make out with you aggressively.#without directions. he just defaults to that.#I will die on this hill.#if he's caught up in the moment he is not thinking for himself. he's not making decisions. he's just gotta focus that passion and that-#energy somewhere. and kissing is easy #unfortunately for the state of Rex's face.#Mark can go for hours with the strength. stamina. and endurance of a Viltrumite.#he will kiss that man *raw*#he will leave his face bruised #fights have left his face looking better #I also think the dynamic of the “fuck boy” being with someone who is A. as tender hearted as Mark and B. someone who physically-#out matches him in every way.#would eat #I think it just. has a little kick to it.#markrex #rexmark #rex x mark #mark x rex #mark grayson x rex sloan #rex sloan x mark grayson #mark grayson #rex sloan #invincible #they wouldn't make each other better. but not quite worse either.

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zhoufeis · 9 months ago

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THE DOUBLE 墨雨云间 (China, 2024) Dir. Bai Yun Mo, Lu Hao Ji Ji, Ma Shi Ge – Ep. 19

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automatonknight · 1 year ago

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here's the prick i was talking about^ i have so many thoughts and notes about him but they're mostly incomprehensible so when i organize maybe them i'll post them who knows

#art #oc #id in alt #um ummm #idk. if you have any questions as always feel free to ask #ANYWAYS. geez making him has been so fun i love this asshole so much i'm going to put him through the horrors #salute to you Kordian if you see this if you hadn't shown me stalker i probably wouldn't be running in circles about patches now #more notes. i actually have no idea how magic works in-universe i just thought it would be cool. he's not good at using it he sucks. he's #shocked himself so many times probably. will that stop him? no #he practiced fencing for a few years so he actually like. knows how the fight flows or whatever. i think he definitely picks out targets wh #don't get their bearings quite as well and dances around them and shit like that he just likes to be mean i guess #idk idk. also he joins the lovelies at one point. that's like. semi-canon. it's sorta like with triumphant and normal walenty to me. like #they both exist but the. so to speak. evil one kind of doesn't in a way if you get me. i mostly thought it would be a fun thing to think #about. and also patches would do that and then he'd freak out like what the fuck am i doing and leave #another random thing about his pronouns. well i mostly use he/him for him. that 'any' is more in a way that if you referred to patches as #she or they or it or anything else he wouldn't care #but he usually doesn't mention it and stuff

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astralhope · 4 months ago

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Rank 54: The true king of Numbers!!

#Yuma's power of believing in people was what strengthened their bond #Yuma had always believed in his friends and he had trusted Astral even when he didn't remember his past and his mission #and even in that moment he was dueling against Astral because he believed in a better future for him #a better future for them #I think that this power what was Astral loved more about Yuma #because it was Yuma's trust that made Astral believe more in himself #and even if this first and last duel between them is tragic #I can't help but think that Astral was happy to see that Yuma was ready to fight to stay with him #and also that Astral already knew that he would have sacrificed himself even if Yuma had won #and because of that he wanted to be sure that Yuma wouldn't lose this important power of believing #I'm losing my mind about how they are looking at each other #Yuma's eyes are filled with determination #he is fighting this duel with all of himself because he wants to save Astral #he still believes in a future where they can be together #while Astral's expression is full of love #he simply adores Yuma #He loves Yuma and his spirit his Kattobingu his power of believing in people #astral zexal #astral yugioh #yuma tsukumo #zexal #yugioh zexal #yu gi oh zexal #ygo zexal #zexal manga #zexal manga spoiler #(I also have to add how stunning Astral looks here)#(I love him so much)#(I mean he always looks beautiful and stunning)#(It's just that I keep adoring him more every time I see him)

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slumbering-shadows · 10 months ago

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Do you guys think Bobby Dawn, a very devoted cleric of Sol, knows that Porter's little plot for godhood got his grandson killed. Does he know that Porter has essentially, in the eyes of his religion at least, damned his grandson to hell for eternity. does he know. does he care?

#fantasy high #fantasy high spoilers #fantasy high junior year #like its obvious from the letters or emails or whatever that riz found that bobby is not a follower of ankarna #he is supportive of porters plan but still very much a follower of sol #did he know porter was leading buddy away from the righteous path of helio?#he has to guess somehow that porter was involved based on what kristen told him. but the last correspondence we see was about the devils #honey #like thats gotta be... that HAS to important to him. otherwise wouldn't porter have told him? wouldn't buddy have reached out?#is bobby himself dead now after confronting porter? or will the bad kids perhaps gain an unlikely ally in this last fight?#or was him freaking out just a very good performance? i dont think it was but...

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sassypantsjaxon · 9 months ago

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Absolutely blows my mind that anybody could insist Zoro is so loyal to Luffy (and apparently only Luffy????) that he would fight (kill????) another member of the crew, and yet somehow that loyalty wouldn't make him listen when Luffy tells him not to????

#yes this is about people saying Zoro would kill Sanji if he had gone to whole cake island #no he wouldn't #go reread thriller bark. enies lobby. whisky peak #<- yknow. the one where Zoro fights Luffy himself???#not to mention Wano??? where Sanji just trusts Zoro to understand what he means by 'not himself'??? without any further explanation????#but that's okay. carry on with your loyalty scaling.#one piece #roronoa zoro #black leg sanji #monkey d. luffy

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nemesis-is-my-middle-name · 4 months ago

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this is a tiny pet peeve but i think its kinda odd that people seem to like. forget, or maybe just neglect to take into account, that yellow, for whatever reason (whether he's an alt universe john or a fresh piece of this universe's KIY that kayne went and ripped off) has ALSO been trapped in the dark world prior to being with arthur and has exactly as many Feelings about it. this is a very load bearing character trait imo