#he was actually being trained by batman
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oifaaa · 1 year ago
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I think the only way Bruce would be able to avoid the batman allegations is if he steered into it he does an interview where he acknowledges that Jason is Red Hood but then blames it on Batman
I keep thinking about how nonchalant Jason is about giving away his secret identity and how if even one of those goons bothered to look up Jason todd they'd probably have a half decent chance of figuring out who batman is
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voiider · 10 months ago
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fake psychic Tim but its just. its just psych. Jason dies and batman goes off the deep end so Tim (instead of becoming robin) starts going ham on the 'tips to the police' bc if the police can deal with the smaller crimes then Tim doesn't have to worry about batman killing a petty thief.
Except he's running himself into the ground and he starts getting sloppy bc he's giving the local police info, and bludhaven info (bc dick) AND probably giving Nightwing info when he can and someone catches him or he leaves a paper trail and then Officer Dick Grayson apprehends him and takes him in for questioning and Tim is like "you can't talk to me without my parents or a lawyer present, I'm a minor. And my parents are in Guatemala, so you better call my lawyer."
and Dick is like "kid you're not in trouble i just need to know who's giving you this information." Because there is NO WAY this kid isn't working with someone. Someone who is using a child to drop off information, which while noble to help the police, is putting this child in danger and tim is like, pretty offended actually. That it's being implied that he COULDN'T do this himself.
So he's like "im not working for anyone."
and Dick is like "you have to be getting the info from somewhere. I just wanna help."
and Tim is like AUGH ADULTS "I just- i figured it out on my own" and its CLEAR that Dick doesn't believe him which is, first off, super insulting, never meet your heroes, and second he shouldn't be talking anyway or admit that he goes out at night or Dick will do something stupid like try to make him stop. So he's like (rolling eyes) "I'm psychic. Are you happy? Can I have my phone call now?"
#batman#tim drake#Cue Dick ALMOST not buying it but he's like 'okay kid'#if you're psychic prove it.#And Tim is like oh he thought i was serious??? Uh#“you're favorite animal is a bat.“ And Dick looks at him confused but then sorta pales a little and is like ”... what.”#and tim is like “and you really like nighttime... walks.”#And Dick like turns off the recording and is like “kid what are you saying to me”#and Tim is like “I know you're Nightwing. The ... spirits told me.”#and honestly it's more believable that a 12 year old kid is psychic than that he figured out who Nightwing was on his own#ted talks#anyways lots of fun hijinks can ensue. Tim is technically a security rick and even though dick REALLY doesn't wanna talk to bruce#he should tell him about this... psychic child#Which can just be more questions and Tim answering them and is like#if i wasn't psychic how would i know this.#and Bruce.... doesn't know. So they have no choice but to believe him#psych tim au#also including: bruce being like “.... can you tell my son (jason) i love him?”#tim would actually be pretty good on the field with moments notice observations#he's been trained his whole life to read people at parties and know what they want from him and what they mean#regular people are MUCH easier to read than the elite who say everything backhanded and all have like poised masks of perfection#raye was telling me their psychic tim au and i was like 'ok but what if just psych'#catch us out here both writing separate fake psychic tim aus
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wesavegotham · 11 months ago
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I would have more sympathy for people complaining about "Damian being treated as Bruce's only real child because they are related by blood" if Damian didn't literally spent probably over 75% of his existence doing something far away from his father while Bruce doesn't even comment on the fact that he hasn't seen his son in months and has no idea what he's doing.
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dukeofthomas · 2 months ago
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BTAS Batman feels like a normal human who's really trained and skilled and manages to pull off amazing feats
Comics Batman just feels like a superpowered human
#my dc posting#btas#batman#the moment 2 big guys with weapons stop being actual threats is the moment he's no longer realistically human to me#like it doesn't matter how skilled or trained you are. a guy w a weapon is always a threat!!#yes it's fiction this isn't an actual complaint#but the point is when BTAS batman succeeds and does something impressive i go wow! amazing! just a regular human w lots of training#doing cool fucking shit!#but when i see any otherbatman do anything ever i just go -_- bc he's not actually limited in any way or grounded in real human capabilitie#this is why i enjoy the action of BTAS so much bc it actually makes me ROOT for the hero#bc he CAN fail and get captured and all that and it doesn't feel unrealistic and when he gets out of it i actually feel#excited abt it yknow??#is it a crime to wanna watch something that actually manages to make you root for the hero instead of just sitting there like this -_- cus#y'know he's gonna succeed anyway and whatever Amazing Super Cool Shit he pulls off doesn't actually feel all that#...kinda reminds me of doctor who when it's done right#like idc how much i get told abt Wow he's just a non-powered human pulling off all these amazing things! he's just so strong and smart!#when there's nothing abt him that makes me actually believe these are normal non-powered human things#like i'm not gonna cheer when a superpowered guy can fly. they have superpowers. and batman FEELS like that no matter what i'm told by word#idk honestly i'm just complaining at this point. but i like doing that especially abt something so low-stakes as this so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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welcometogrouchland · 11 months ago
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I support the "Batman was unfairly biased to Stephanie for XYZ reasons" crowd so strongly bc DC claims that Bruce is a master planner who is able to understand anyone's psychology but he didn't realize that literally every single one of Steph's problems as a teenager would've been solved by her joining a shitty punk band. If he couldn't figure that much out then he didn't understand her for a minute
#ramblings of a lunatic#PLEASE TALK TO ME I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ON STEPHANIE IN A SHITTY PUNK BAND#her bandmates have turned into ocs it's stage 5 at this point boys#anyway what is steph dealing w/ pre-52 as spoiler that got her in hot water?#1. the anger issues. easily fixed by her getting to scream about beating her dad to death without actually doing it#2. nobody fucking listens to her (including batman). well when u are playing music ppl are definitely fucking listening#3. has no non-batfam friends and thus ends up feeling abandoned almost every time she gets kicked out of the group. bandmates are friends!#don't like being in your shitty house? go to your band mates house and jam!#need to articulate the anger issues in a way that doesn't disturb your frazzled paranoid boyfriend? write angsty songs!#also I do genuinely have a lot of thoughts on how music was applied to Stephanie's character and what it tells us about her#like she loved it. clearly. and she was GOOD at it too. steph is constantly perceived as a screw up and has pretty low opinion of herself#piano was something she could take pride in. in i believe issue 113 of tims og robin series-#-tim is AMAZED at her playing all these years later. so is nocturna a few issues earlier#there's a standard visual language in comics for good or bad music- notation drawn in either shaky or smooth lines#stephs are all smooth and golden. she's good even after all these years of not practicing#but all she says to tim after he compliments her is ''i used to be better...'' SHE SEES THE WORST IN HERSELF AND HER ABILITIES#SHE DESERVES A CHANCE TO FEEL GOOD AT AT LEAST ONE THING LIKE SHE FINALLY GOT TO AS BATGIRL IN HER SOLO#and onto my final point: dinah has several times expressed some degree of fondness/admiration for steph. steph has likewise trained w dinah#and thinks she's cool as fuck. which makes sense. bc dinah is cool as fuck#and what is dinah in??? that's right. a band#steph should join dinahs band for her mental health. this has been an essay#stephanie brown#spoiler dc#dc batgirl#batgirls#<- since that series re-canonized pianist steph!! bless them!
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roseworth · 4 months ago
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I feel like people have this really weird thing about needing Dick to be more skilled than Jason which I don't get since Jason's just had more teachers than Dick and also a lot of people have this weird idea that Dick was taught by slade
i think dick being trained by slade is one of the best examples of how bat fanon is like a big game of telephone. like i think he was trained by slade for a bit in the teen titans cartoon (idk i never watched it but ive heard ppl talk about it) then people talk about the renegade arc as dick working with slade so people start to think that renegade was dick being trained by slade and. no. if you actually read the renegade arc dick barely spends any time with slade (its pretty much all with rose) but ppl think that it was dick as slade apprentice/sidekick and constantly working with him or something??? iirc slade and dick dont go on a single mission together for that arc. its basically just dick on babysitting duty while slade's doing his own thing
i understand that some people are insistent that dick is a skilled fighter because in current canon hes being written like hes incompetent, so my heart goes out to dick fans. however ! idk how people continue to insist that dick is one of the best fighters of the bats. hes a good fighter but thats because theyre all good fighters sorry!! dick's training comes primarily (and possibly exclusively) from batman, so he only has the same amount of knowledge as anyone else that was trained by batman. the ones who are better fighters are the ones that were trained outside of just the Bat Training, like cass jason & damian
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godblooded · 2 years ago
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throws on the batman while i prep to write bruce because i need to love my boy. be back when i’m done crying to probably dump my thoughts. ps: love the league of assassins ref that’s the beginning with baby bruce in the training attire. gorgeous touch. 
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starlooove · 2 years ago
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How to explain my fave Robin is Matt McGinnis
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angstandhappiness · 4 months ago
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BAH HAH interesting
Jason using his guns as blunt weapons is so funny like imagine ur getting shot at by the Red Hood, he runs out of ammo, you think you have a chance and he just throws the fucking pistol at you
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im-totally-not-an-alien-2 · 19 days ago
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"Oh my god." The kid muttered, pacing back and forth in front of the summoning circle anxiously as he clutched some old book to his chest, "Oh my god, I just killed Nightwing."
"Uh," Nightwind started to speak, but didn't get far.
"Oh my god, my dad is Nightwing!"
"Wait, what?!"
That seemed to catch the boys attention and...yeah the kid looked a lot like he did as a teen. "I, uh" The kid rubbed the back of his neck nervously, "I'm kinda your clone. My parents made me and told me recently about how I was born and I wanted to meet you!"
He threw his hands up in the air, one hand still clasping the book, "They told me you were dead, so I tried to summon your ghost! I swear I didn't know!" This seemed to switch him back into whatever spiral ge was in before, "Oh god, I killed my own father."
Dick hurried to speak before he lost the chance again, "I'm probably still alive."
"Huh?" The kid looked over at him, a hint of hope in his features
"Yeah," Nightwing shrugged, "some other bats were with me. They're trained to keep my vitals up until they can get me back to the cave. Plus, I felt my soul pulled out of my body by force. I don't think you actually stopped anything from functioning."
The kid sagged with relief, "So batman isn't going to murder me?"
An odd sound came from within the summoning circle as Nightwing covered his mouth
"Are you laughing at me?! I'm being serious!"
This time, the vigilante made no move to hide his laughter, "We don't kill kiddo, besides he probably won't maul his own grandkid, right?"
Unfortunately this gave the kid something new to spiral over, "Oh god, my grandpa is Batman."
"How about we start over?" The bluebird asked, "I'm Nightwing, what's your name?"
"Um, Danny. Danny Fenton."
Dick gave an award winning smile, "Nice to meet you, Danny. Could you break the circle so I can get out?"
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bloomeng · 3 months ago
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This is my official Batfam Magical Girl AU Masterpost (everyone clapped)
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(image updated: 9/21/24)
I’m going to do a brief overview and then go into more details for those interested.
Bruce being from old money (and apparently being connected to Camelot) inherited a mysterious mineral with unknown properties. In its raw form it’s very unassuming, but when cut like gemstones and added to accessories it can be harnessed into a tool. By altering the mineral into a wearable item it allows the magic within to be channeled. The magic of the mineral connects with its wielder to create an outfit and (typically) a weapon. These outfits do not grant the wearer special abilities outside of the transformation and the weapon, but when worn the wearer is granted (what is basically) hammerspace and a nearly impenetrable outfit. The uniform granted is not something they can alter the appearance of but will change gradually overtime to reflect how the wielder has grown.
This mineral will henceforth be known as Arcanium. It operates on Kryptonite logic in that it’s— allegedly— super rare but also shows up whenever the plot needs it. (I’m aware it shares a name with a card game, but I wanted my Kryptonite spoof)
Martha Wayne unknowingly started the cycle by turning— what she thought was a rare gemstone— into a brooch. She died shortly after having it made and Alfred held onto it in her memory. Like canon Bruce goes on his journey of self-exploration to train. When he comes back he enacts his plan the way he does in Batman: Year One, where he goes out in basically just make-up, and it goes poorly. He wanders his manor trying to formulate a strategy and is drawn to his parent’s room and finds his mother’s brooch. Cue the first magical girl transformation. From there he alters the brooch to fit his bat aesthetic and the Batman Brooch is born.
Dick comes into his life the same way as canon. Bruce takes him in as a ward, Dick tries to track down Zucco on his own, etc. Bruce decides to use the other raw sample of Arcanium to turn into a second magical artifact. He lets Dick pick the theme, and thus the Robin Pendant is born. The rest is history.
(Before I continue I want to warn that I’m making shit up as I go, so some of this is subject to change as I move forward.)
The Robin Pendant is passed down from Robin to Robin. Each Robin got their own unique look while using it. Following canon, Dick and Bruce have their falling out and Dick gives up the Robin Pendant in a moment of anger. In this au I think Dick, not having the pendant to fall back on, tries to lead a vigilante-free life, but of course falls back into it. During a fight he somehow manages to stumble across Arcanium in its raw form. Recognizing it he takes it with him. Like Nightwing: Year One he has his conversation with Superman and decides to become his own hero. Using his knowledge of Arcanium from his years with Bruce he creates his own magical artifact and becomes Nightwing.
This is a good place to interject that I’m not changing any of their hero names. I was asked about it a couple times due to the caption, “Red Bow & Sailor Nightwing” on my Dick and Jason designs. It was just a silly caption, because I didn’t want to simply state “Jason and Dick Magical Girl au.” But being serious, I don’t really see a reason to change their names, with the exception of maybe Red Hood, seeing as I didn’t give him a red hood. My au operates on Sailor Moon logic where despite the lack of masks no one recognizes them, and it’s just vaguely explained by magic. I think it would be funny if Bruce chose to wear a mask anyway because he’s that paranoid, but we’ll see when I actually design him. Anyway point is Red Hood is lacking a red hood, maybe he secretly has a red hood on his jacket or maybe he really does go by Red Bow, I’ll leave that up to interpretation.
Arcanium does not just accidentally appear. At the end of the day it’s still a mineral and it’s not sentient, but the magic has an element of “the wand chooses the user.” It’s not so much a “chosen one thing,” so much as the magic can sense intention. It doesn’t care about the morality of the user, the magic is more seeking a symbiotic connection. (Meaning yes rogues can in fact wield artifacts.) Simply put, it wants a host that will be able to wield it. In its raw form the magic is dormant but it seeks to be… not dormant, so when it finds those who actually have the potential to create an artifact and use it, it reveals itself. It was not a coincidence that Martha had the inclination to have the brooch made, it was not a coincidence that Bruce was drawn to his parent’s room, and it was not a coincidence that Dick found Arcanium in the alleyway.
Each of the Bats have their origin moments with their own magical artifacts. I don’t have the whole timeline down, but I will say there was a lot of drama between Tim and Damian, because Tim was forced to hand over the pendant. Even though he technically relinquished it, emotionally the connection wasn’t severed. No one was sure if the transition would work, but Arcanium responds to whoever needs it more and therefore who will use it more. Like canon, Tim is having an awful time during that era. On top of all of it he’s had his title stripped from him and he can’t even argue because if it wasn’t the right move the pendant wouldn’t have responded to Damian. Dick tries to comfort him by telling him that Arcanium will appear for him when he’s ready, but Tim is furious and impatient. So like a well-adjusted person he decides he’s going to engineer his own magical artifact artificially. It goes as well as his attempt to clone Kon does. It’s not until Tim starts to get back on his feet that Arcanium presents itself to him. My thinking is that while Arcanium finds its users when they need it most, Tim’s case is abnormal. His acquisition of the pendant was unconventional from the start since he showed up and demanded to take on the Robin role. Arcanium is drawn to individuals who will actually use its properties. Tim tends to rely more on his own detective work, which renders the pendant’s properties pretty moot. Especially when he’s going off the deep end, he becomes a hermit meaning a) he wouldn’t really need/use Arcanium’s properties and b) he inadvertently limited his own chances of stumbling across it “in the wild.”
In a similar vein I believe Barbara’s journey is abnormal in that she forged her own Batgirl artifact that operates a little differently than the others, seeing as she made it without Bruce’s influence. After the accident she shelved it, maybe she passed it down to Cass, but eventually she gets it back. She created the Oracle identity without it, and for a long time the Batgirl artifact is something she avoids using, until she gets the idea to combine it with her computer to create a magic computer… sort of. She gets a uniform that is basically connected to the computer.
Going back to Damian needing the Robin Pendant more, its reaction to his acquisition was unique. As I mentioned previously the suits typically provide a weapon, well Damian is the exception. Unlike all the other Robin’s Damian didn’t need more weapons in his life, what he needed was guidance. For the first time the pendant granted Damian a magical animal guardian, which is how he gets Alfred the Cat in this au. Despite being an animal lover Damian is extremely pissed at this development. He wanted dual swords or a scarier animal at least. He can’t formally communicate with Alfred the Cat but he understands him intrinsically, though Alfred the Cat seems to be able to understand human speech somewhat. Only Damian seems to be able to truly understand Alfred the Cat. (Cue the antics of his siblings trying to figure out what the cat means or trying to control him in any capacity.) Besides being an animal, Alfred the Cat is also unique in that he doesn’t dissipate when Damian isn’t in uniform the way that the weapons do. Like the weapons he can be summoned by the pendant, but he seems to have existed prior to the pendant’s creation. (I’m toying with the idea that while in uniform, the cat would also get some sort of uniform.)
Before I get into Duke and his abnormalities, I want to address the Speedsters in this au. It’ll make sense after.
So the Flash. I want to say I don’t know if I will get around to creating full designs for them. I do have plans for Bart and maybe Wally, but I have determined how I want their mechanics to operate in the context of the au. Not all the heroes in this au are “magical girls,” in fact I’ve made the executive decision that you have to be human to wield an artifact. Arcanium may have magic in it, but it doesn’t grant its user magical abilities beyond the uniform itself. The speedsters retain their canon origins, hit by lighting blah blah blah, only with one key difference: they had Arcanium on them when they were hit. Instead of engineering an artifact Arcanium fused with their bodies granting them powers. I want to keep the magic transformation aspect (because it’s not a magical girl au without it), so instead of using a physical artifact as a channel for their powers, it’s instead the act of transforming that serves as a gateway to their speed abilities.
To me it was always important to maintain Batman’s identity of not having super powers and having to rely on engineering, which is why the Batfam have to physically build their artifacts. In a similar way I wanted to retain the integrity of the Flash’s identity of being meta but also still human. Which brings me back to Duke. I know in canon that Duke inherited his abilities, but for the sake of the au I’ve decide that he either had an accident when he was young in which traces of Arcanium fused with him or his parents had it in them and he inherited it from them, but regardless it’s less potent, but operates similar to the Speedsters. For years he couldn’t fully transform or use his powers and it wasn’t until— with Bruce’s guidance— he was able to create an artifact that allowed him to channel his abilities and transform. Even though he is a meta I wanted him to still have some of those Batfam qualities in there.
But what about the Superfam? They’re not human so how do their transformations work? The answer is simple: They’re not “magical girls.” At least not real ones, they’re faking. They’re not human (Kon and Jon are technically half human but they still get their abilities from their Kryptonian DNA), and thus cannot forge a connection with Arcanium. Truthfully I’m about to get silly— even sillier than this au already is— but I have decided that Clark is a fake artifact wielder. I like the idea that Batman has been operating longer than Superman has, so when Clark decided to become a hero in his own right his only example of how to style himself was from the bat themed vigilante, who might as well be a cryptid, operating out of Gotham. Only blurry pictures of him existed, so Clark designed his outfit based on his Kryptonian origins and Batman’s aesthetics. He had no idea about the existence of Arcanium or how it worked. This is also why Kon’s design looks so much like his canon outfit with a few magical girl elements (and definitely not because I think the lines in his canon suit already lend themselves well to a magical girl aesthetic and didn’t want to change much). Later when he gets to know Batman more he learns about the transformations, to which he panics and invents his own transformation using Kryptonian tech (ex: MAWS’s transformation). For years Bruce goes crazy trying to figure out Arcanium’s effects on aliens and if it grants them abilities on top of the ones they’re born with, and if Clark has plans to use it as a weapon, and how he managed to forge the connection in the first place— Clark comes clean as a fake once they reveal their identities to each other.
Side tangent but I find it hilarious that Green Lanterns are— by technicality— already “magical girls,” considering they’re granted magical accessories that give them powers and transform their clothing. Hal is very clear with the JL that he is nothing like Batman and constantly feels the need to assert that he is not a magical artifact wielder. The non-human members of the team still lump them together anyway.
Things I haven’t figured out:
- what each of the batfam’s weapons are
- what each of the magical artifacts are
- what to refer to magical artifact wielders as
Stepping outside the canon(?) lore of the au for a minute, obviously I’m redesigning DC characters using inspiration from a genre, because that’s what “magical girl” is. It’s a genre. This is why I refer to it in quotes and don’t call them magical boys, because I am always referring to it as a genre, which isn’t a gendered thing. However, in universe they wouldn’t call themselves magical anything, the same way the characters of Sailor Moon don’t refer to themselves as magical girls, but rather Sailor Scouts. As of right now I’m sort of just referring to them as artifact wielders, but I feel like Bruce would come up with a better name. On a similar note, throughout this whole thing I’ve been referring to Arcanium in it’s wearable state as an artifact. I don’t know if that’s the best term, but I can’t think of anything better for the generalized form of Arcanium outside of it’s raw state. For now I guess it will be “artifacts” and “artifact wielders.”
- how the wonderfam fits into this
I really can’t think of a reason why Wonder Woman would be a “magical girl” in this au. She was born with abilities, she’s not human, and I can’t see her altering her uniform to match the aesthetic. A transformation would just be a waste of time for her. I could to see maybe Cassie or Donna wanting to match with their respective teams, and perhaps maybe that’s why they would alter their uniforms? All I know is I want see Tim, Kon, Bart and Cassie as a matching “magical girl set.”
Fin… for now.
[I’m just going to put this here preemptively, because I’ve gotten messages about turning my au into fics or tiktok skits. You’re free to use this lore HOWEVER you MUST credit me not just for the designs but for the creation of the lore. I’ve put a lot of time and thought into this and I love that people love it, so I just ask for recognition. If you want to make something that’s inspired by my designs or loosely based on my au, just a simple credit for the inspiration is fine. You’re free to change things this is just how my own au operates. Regardless I would prefer to be tagged so that people can find me but also because I’d love to see other’s work.]
Current designs:
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thevoidstaredback · 7 months ago
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A funny thought just came to me, so here's a new writing prompt:
The Justice League doesn't think that Batman has a civilian identity. For the most part, he only ever comes out at night, adding to the nocturnal rumors, but he has been seen during the day when there are huge problems or bigger rouge attacks.
And, because the JL don't think he has a civilian identity, they naturally assume that none of the other Gotham Vigilantes do, either. Signal, the only consistent day shift, is obviously a different breed than the rest. All of the others are nocturnal.
Extra points if they think they're a group of cryptids.
One day, Bruce and Tim are needed to help set up at WE for a press conference. One that Lois Lane is covering. At the same time, the JL Is having a meeting. Normally Dick would put on the Batman suit, but Nightwing is needed at the meeting, too. They can't say that Batman is off world, because all of those trips are logged and followed by the Lanterns. So, the next logical thing to do is for Nightwing to tell the JL that Batman and Red Robin were needed as civilians, but he will make sure to pass the information on to them, as well as record the meeting.
"Batman doesn't have a civilian identity," Is the response he gets. "None of you do, right?"
Nightwing, for all his training, doesn't react outside of his smile getting slightly bigger. "You don't think we have secret identities?"
"No, we kinda just assumed you all just hid away in a cave or something when you weren't needed or on duty."
Oh, these sweet summer children. Nightwing is trying very hard not to laugh at them. "We, we do have secret identities, we don't do nothing when we aren't in costume."
"Are you sure?" That's the Flash. "'Cause I'm pretty sure we'd recognize you guys out of costume." Kudos to him for being so confident about that. "Most of you only have tiny masks over your eyes. That's not enough to cover an identity."
Nightwing takes a glance at Superman, not that anyone can see his eyes move behind the domino mask. The alien's eyes have shifted left.
"I've been to Gotham plenty of time," Green Arrow speaks up, "I know I haven't seen everyone in the city, but I'm pretty sure I'd recognize your build. It's pretty distinct."
Bold. All of the Wayne Clan have met Green Arrow in and out of costume. They've actually met most of the JL in and out of costume. Should he tell them? Nah, that's not funny. He can't wait to tell the others.
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menolly5600 · 1 month ago
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The irony of Dick being furious with Bruce about gaslighting them when Danny was real, when they were all gaslighting Bruce about Danny when they thought he wasn't real.
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Also, someone else wrote a fic!
Okay so we all know how Danny fits into the 'Wayne' look with dark hair and blue eyes. But hear me out. Bruce adopts kids too fast for the majority of the population to keep up so when citizens see Danny they just assume Bruce already adopted him and they just haven't checked the news yet.
Just Danny going to get a burger and the guy behind the counter goes, "on the house!" Danny doesn't question it and moves on. People just keep treating him with great respect thinking he's a Wayne and Danny is just oblivious.
At the end of his trip or whatever he explains how he has no idea why people complain about muggings and crime, everyone was just so nice there.
Not until like a week later at a fancy party a news person asks Bruce where his newest son Danny is and Bruce is just so fucking confused. He doesn't remember adopting a Danny, but he doesn't want to be wrong and look like a bad father for forgetting one of his kids so he panics and says he's in his room or some bs.
Later he realizes that he has adopted no Danny but now people think he did and he can't say "Oh I don't actually have a son Danny" after telling someone that he did have a Danny.
The news gets curious on why they don't ever see Danny. Bruce says that poor little Danny is camera shy and isn't ready to be in the spotlight yet. The rest of his kids are absolutely dying watching to see how far this lie takes Bruce and tell him it's his fault for not remembering his own kids.
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rhinexstone · 8 months ago
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I know there’s already been some hcs about Bruce Wayne going on a DC universe version of SNL but I just need to play it out for y’all
The whole bit is that this is the first time Brucie has ever taken anything so serious in his life, like the promo clip where he’s awkwardly standing with the music guest and a cast mate is basically like “I went to this thing called a meeting yesterday, have you guys ever heard of those before?? Wild!!” And Alfred makes a cameo in his opening monologue where he hands him his script on a silver platter.
But the thing that drives his family crazy is that he actually does a skit where he IS Batman. And they’re all freaking out because like holy shit Bruce there’s walking the line and using it as a jump rope. And he won’t elaborate on any of the specifics just that he actually pitched the idea himself.
The skit is basically just “what if Bruce Wayne was Batman” and it’s him trying to stop a mugging, but he immediately takes a tumble (his Instagram story hinted at stunt training and everyone had their theories, but it all being so that he could do a Buster Keaton-esque stunt is so much better). He freaks out at the sound of some warning fire and immediately surrenders despite the mugger really being equally afraid of him, and then a Villain of the Week captures him with ease, and he flirts the entire time he’s being dragged away.
He fucking kills it for someone without an acting background (to most people’s knowledge) and from that point on it’s a running joke/meme for gothamites to post or talk about what Bruce Wayne Batman would do in place of regular Batman
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writerfromthestars · 1 month ago
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DP X DC PROMPT: DANNY'S AN ASSASSIN?!
So Danny gets adopted by the Waynes somehow.
Now, he's a teenage vigilante, he knows all the signs. And he can clearly tell that Damian and Tim are sneaking out under the cover of night to fight crime as Robin and Red Robin.
While ordinarily this would lead to the connection between the Waynes being Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood, and various other assorted vigilantes, that's not what we're here for, so instead, what happens is that Danny thinks that his two absolutely normal little brothers are sneaking out, meeting strange people dressed in spandex and Kevlar on rooftops, and punching criminals.
He has no issue with this.
The only issue he has is that Tim and Damian are inexperienced, I mean, Damian's twelve or something like that, he can't have been Robin for long. He's not particularly willing to get back into heroism himself, though, so this leads to him casually dropping random tidbits of information that only an ex-vigilante/hero/assassin/other part of the caped community, would know into regular conversation.
Like, if Tim's using bandages on his hand, Danny will suddenly drop the fact that that particular brand is very absorbent and works really well to take care of large, bloody wounds, like bullet holes in important places.
If Damian's reading a book about different knives, and their creation processes (because be real, he totally would) Danny will read over his shoulder a bit and then just point out a knife that would particularly good for stabbing someone in the stomach, or slitting someone's throat. (he knows this because of a. his rogues trying to kill him and b. Dan likes sharp things.)
The three of them are watching some superhero movie or something, and Danny goes on a twelve-minute rant about how the fight scenes would never work that way.
Tim and Damian come to the conclusion that their new brother has been trained by the League of Assassins or something.
Here's the issue. Danny hasn't.
So Damian starts dropping little hints that he knows that Danny was part of the League, for example a reference to a technique that only a League member would know. Danny, who has been trained in hand-to-hand by Dan, who was trained by dead League assassins in the alternate timeline, knows the moves.
Danny is just happy that his baby brothers are taking his advice, and opening up to him too. Damian is even starting to talk about fighting with him, and he thinks that they might actually tell him about their nighttime activities soon.
Finally, the two confront him on it. And by that, I mean that like the emotionally constipated bats they are, they utterly fail in their interrogation because they can't just come out and say it out in the open.
Tim: so Danny, I noticed how you know a lot about fighting. and first aid, and stuff.
Damian: I have noticed this as well. Might I inquire as to where you gained these skills?
Danny just thinks that they have figured out his past as a vigilante and that they are worried about him being hurt.
Danny: Don't worry about it. I don't do that type of thing anymore.
Now that's a deflection if Tim's ever heard it.
Damian, digging for more information: I wish to know. Maybe I can learn from whoever it was that taught you?
Danny grimaces slightly before answering.
Danny: Trust me, kiddo, you don't wanna learn from the people who taught me this stuff. They squash you like a bug.
Tim and Damian take this as confirmation that Danny was involve in the League. Danny just means that pitting his rogue gallery, which consists of exclusively ghosts, against living boys would be unfair.
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redsray · 9 months ago
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Batfam AU where Jason never dies, so Tim doesn't join the family the standard way. Instead, he continues pouring most of his time and energy into his photography, eventually becoming known as a popular photographer for events and all that. So now, picture this: Tim gets hired to be a photographer for a Wayne gala. Obviously, he's ecstatic, because he can take pictures of Batman, Robin and Nightwing and be in their presence for a whole night. Since Tim is so naturally talented in stealth and taking pictures unnoticed, the second one of the fam realises this they're like: this kid is good. Tim manages to go unnoticed by all 3 of them (all bat-trained, one literally batman) multiple times during the night, and even when he is noticed, he disappears before they can manage to get a good look at him; to the sheer amazement of Dick and Jason.
Jason, (very discreetly putting snacks in his suit pocket): i know you're under the table, kid.
Tim: don't mind me, Mr. Todd-Wayne, sir, just taking a few pictures
Jason: right... Jason's fine, and what pictures were you taking from under the table?!
Tim, showing him perfectly good shots of him: these.
Jason: how did you get that. it looks like you took it from the rafters
Tim, nodding: I did.
Jason, glancing at the ceiling: ...what?
Tim, gone:
Jason: no fucking way.
Dick, hearing a very, very faint camera shutter from behind him:
Dick, turning around and finding no one there: what the actual...
Dick, getting the feeling of being watched and whirling around to find Tim staring at him from across the room: ... huh.
Jason, pulling Dick aside: you see that kid too, right?!
Dick, nodding: the camera kid, yeah?
Jason: who is that.
Dick: he's one of the hired photographers, apparently. one of the best in his field, despite his age.
Jason: he's good. like, really good. snuck up on me 4 times already, the little bastard.
Dick: you too? i swear he's constantly watching. it's creepy how well he can sneak past both of us.
Jason:
Dick:
Jason: you don't think...
Dick: no. B would've told us.
Jason:
Dick:
Dick: did he get another kid and not tell us somehow
Bruce: what do you mean another kid?
Jason: you heard us. did you adopt another kid and not tell us?!
Bruce: no?? how would I even?? ... what's this about?
Dick: one of the photographers has managed to sneak up on both me and Jay multiple times already
Bruce: what.
Jason: he also can't be more than like. 15 or 16. so forgive us for assuming you took another one in.
Bruce: do you know his name?
Dick:
Jason:
Bruce: really?
Dick: in our defence, he's very hard to catch. i wouldn't be surprised if he's snuck up on you, too.
[camera shutter noise]
All of them, whipping their heads toward the sound only to find nothing but air:
Tim, smiling from the other side of the room:
Jason: do you see what we mean?!
Cue an entire night of shenanigans where it's just Dick, Jason and Bruce trying to catch Tim and learn about him. Upon finding out who he is and where he lives, Dick immediately asks to keep him as an honorary member of the family. Jason is hesitant at first but at some point Tim calls Bruce Batman instead of Mr. Wayne on accident and Jason laughs so hard he's basically won over. Bruce can do nothing but watch as Tim proceeds to come over almost every night for sleepovers and is coddled by both of his sons. And he can't deny, the kid's investigation and stealth skills are top tier. By the time Dick and Jason both start referring to Tim as 'their younger brother' Bruce has just accepted his fate.
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