#he might become my The Character ™️ again

[dragonchomperz]

Uh oh.

[janiedean]

I have a few problems with Brienne's character.

1. Shouldn't she be bitter to world for someone who went through what she went through like Tyrion? Isn't it boring this way?

2. Brienne believes in rules. Why does she support Renly? She should have supported Joffrey first because she didn't know about incest. She should have supported Stannis after she learned incest.

3. If she doesn't care about the rules, why is she angry at Jaime for killing Aerys? She says he shouldn't have killed him even though Aerys was cruel. She never says I don't think you killed Aerys for the right reasons, she just says you shouldn't have.

weeell

1 she could... and most people would have been, but if she became then that she'd be sandor or tyrion or jaime, not *brienne* - like the entire point of her character is that she manages to *not* be bitter and cynical even if a bunch of shit happened to her and that *even* after she gets through her whole affc ordeal which does give her even more of a wake up call when it comes to how bad things are around she still doesn't become cynical or bitter and she still believes in her vows, which is why brienne is gonna eventually become the best knight in the realm™️ recognized by everyone and not just by the readers, because she's the only one who embodies all the knightly virtues AND lives by them AND even if she went through experiences that could and might have turned her cynical and bitter that's not gonna be what's in store for her

and btw my pet theory that she's gonna kill lady stoneheart for jaime in front of him is also because I think it's fundamental that a jaime who's back on his track to be honorable and found some peace can coach her through what happens when you kill your liege lord who went insane and might help her not turn out the way he did, more on that in answers two and three

2 she doesn't believe in *rules* though, she believes in honour and the knightly code and she's also in love with renly - like, the thing is: renly is the only person who treated her decently in her eyes (for her standards which is BAD - like again I love my girl but she was ready to die for him because he danced with her and didn't tell her she was ugly to her face which is a very fucking low standard), he's obviously her type, she fell in love with him, she swore herself to him and wanted to be in his guard, so unless renly did something like exceedingly HORRIBLE or dishonorable or something nothing was stopping her from siding with him - also when it comes to current westeros kingship..... I mean maybe but if you want to split hairs then the baratheons in themselves could have been seen as them being usurpers if one thought targaryens had the right of it. also if renly visited tarth and renly has storm's end technically she's already sort of sworn to him or anyway more in his orbit (he went to visit tarth for the political trip not stannis), also like the incest thing was something *stannis* said to corroborate his claim but it's not like cersei or anyone else ever owned up to it so she could care about it or not, but tldr if there's a crown crisis and people secede knights are free to side with whoever they think has the best claim. now I don't think renly had the best claim and as everyone and their walls know I'm everything but renly-friendly or anything like that (like I frankly dislike canon renly a lot for various reasons tho I think he could be a decent person in modern au) and that I think he should have sucked it up and supported stannis... but to her if she's not sworn to stannis first, if renly does his thing and if she loves him then nothing stops her from siding with him without it being a problem for her. like she wants to be a knight following a honor code and choosing a lord/lady/whatever to serve and then doing it to the bitter end is also that. she happened to pick renly but idt that's like anything that is particularly not coherent given the situation.

3 the problem with jaime killing aerys isn't the *rules*, it's the *vows*. now in general so it's out of the way: I was one of those people who was ride or die for jaime from the second he showed up in story and I already had a feeling from the get-go that whichever reason he had for killing aerys he most likely had done everyone a favor even without knowing the specifics, but like... no one knows why jaime did it and the fact that everyone thinks he has shit for honor because he's a knight and killed his liege he swore a vow to and he has zero patience to correct them when he actually did it for a very good reason is half of the reason why everyone has an unwarranted bad opinion of him and why the only person who actually likes him is tyrion bc he knows he's a decent person but no one else got as far as noticing it. now we can discuss to hell and back why jaime just went like fuck that who gives a shit and then decides maybe not but that's not the point.

the point is that a) the way you put that question doesn't take into account a lot of things which I'm getting into in a second, b) that literally no one knows jaime as a person beyond tyrion also bc he doesn't gaf to let others close beyond cers, so like for everyone in the realm that's the guy who killed his king when the ultimate knightly oath is serving your king. now not going into the fact that grrm is showing that knighthood is a rotten institution etc, from brienne's pov when she meets him

a) she's ugly, she doesn't think she has a chance to do anything except dying young while fighting and have ballads written about her while she tries being a knight a thing she knows she's good at and put all her chips on because she has literally nothing else going for herself

b) she's a woman so no one takes her seriously even when she's obviously good/better than 99.9% of her peers and it doesn't happen even after she wins a goddamned kingsguard spot after beating people who bet about who was gonna take her virginity first and the only thing she wanted was being in the kingsguard of a man she loved that she hoped to see on the throne

c) meanwhile jaime has everything from her pov - the name, the looks, the skill (because like everyone talks shit abt him but no one doubts he's good at his trade), got accepted into the kingsguard at *fifteeen*, could have had any woman he wanted had he chosen to not be a knight, while being a knight he's sworn into the highest possible position he could reach in westeros in that role like idk how to put it on paper if you wanna be recognized as a bonafide true knight ™️ no one would ever laugh about being in the KG is what makes it... and what does he do he kills his king and is absolutely unapologetic about it and doing the ultimate wrong thing a knight should never do and he gets to stay in the KG anyway when according to outside view he should have been kicked out while she had to eat dirt to get where she was and no one took her seriously anyway

d) she's also at almost her most naive and she still thinks the world works like vows so she doesn't even consider the fact that he might actually have had a reason to do it, so when

She says he shouldn't have killed him even though Aerys was cruel. She never says I don't think you killed Aerys for the right reasons, she just says you shouldn't have.

... yeah she says she shouldn't have killed him because that = spitting on an institution she thinks is the highest honor to be in (which ofc isn't true but other problem entirely) and it doesn't matter what reasons he might have had to do it, bc at that point she presumes that if he had any he'd have said back in the day and since he never bothered to do that then it doesn't matter. he shouldn't have because he's an anointed knight and it's dishonorable to kill your liege, end of story...

but there's the fallacy with your question because yeah... that happens in the beginning of asos before they get their trauma bonding road trip. if you read asos carefully she starts calling him ser or by his first name only without insults or the kingslayer the second he saves her from being raped the first time, she takes care of him at his worst, he ends up not having any fucks to give anymore about pretending he doesn't care about aerys and after they come through almost dying together and end up in the bath she's ready to hear why it happened and he's ready to share it for the first time period. he does it with her, not with anyone else, and on the spot she probably can't process it but after *that* she basically puts him back on his feet and takes care of him and gets in the way anytime someone else wants to get close before they meet roose, after he saves her from the bear pit she stops calling him names or anything but ser, when they meet and he gives her oathkeeper she tells him the white cloak becomes you so she obviously changed her mind... and in her affc chapters when people talk shit about jaime and his oathbreaking she stands up and leaves the premises because she can't bear to hear it and she tries to justify him to lady stoneheart (good luck) and she doesn't think he's wrong for that anymore. like yeah she doesn't go and tell him straight after he shares his story but she has no reason to because he knows she knows and they trusted each other at that point and when we get into her head she only thinks good of him and it's obvious she changed her mind which again... is another point I never managed to meta about even if I wanted to back in the day but like

tldr

if you notice when you read his pov and then hers and you see how they interact with each other he sounds way younger than his actual age (because he emotionally got stuck at when he killed aerys and only started moving on since he gets chapters) while brienne reads way older than she is because she got through enough shit even if she's barely nineteen that it makes sense she would have matured way faster, but when it comes to their ideals he is way more cynical and jaded because he got through ALL that crap at seventeen and he saw that things suck and he just went like fuck it while she is all idealistic and her-actual-age about it because of what I said in 1 - other than being younger and not having had ptsd level military trauma at his age she is also set apart because she's that devoted to being a knight in a way that reminds him of himself when he was young... so after they get past their crap he remembers wanting to be like her back in the day and tries to get there again and get back his honor while she becomes more mature and less naive and realizes the world isn't black and white so they actually hone each others' sharp edges out in that sense and they get better/learn from each other and that's another thing that's compelling about them, but like if you gotta get there then it makes sense he starts thinking she's a naive idiot who's gonna get jaded the second she finds out how the world works and then he's shocked when she doesn't and she thinks he's a pos who spat on the thing she wants most in the world and she can't have because people don't take her seriously and then she realizes he's actually not like that at all and that he did it for the most noble reason to the point she's willing to die for him later.

like again you can find those things not coherent or whatnot or you can just not vibe with brienne but question 3 hinges just on the beginning of their relationship and doesn't take into account the fact that she misjudges him harshly, openly admits it and regrets it and that post road trip and his hand loss it's obvious she only thinks good of him, question 1... well, yeah, there's that person in the books and it's sandor (and jaime too), if she were the same now she wouldn't be primed to become the new galahad now wouldn't she, and question 2 I answered but like again I still think following renly is the only stupid thing brienne ever did but didn't all teenagers in love at 16-17 do something exceedingly dumb and stupid and then grow up? because that was how old she was when they met (if not 15 actually) and it still didn't clash with the knightly code given she wanted to give him fealty.

anyway for extra clarity wrt my thoughts on most of this stuff that I've given through the years: why brienne in the kg makes no sense, why brienne gaf about renly post affc is preposterous and why the show version killing stannis made no sense (delved into the renly aspect), why brienne's pov is important and why she's primed to be best knight in westeros ™️, jaime's rship with both b. and c. and how it's all courtly love deconstruction which went into the knightly stuff which i couldn't possibly recap rn *flies away*

[pain-in-the-butler]

Out of curiosity…if Ono is your third fav Seb. What’s your Offical Sebastian Ranking™️?

Just as with the ask about the Anime Expo panel, it's fortunate for me that someone reached out, because I was thinking of making this a post on my own eventually someday anyway. What follows might be more information on my opinions of Sebastian than you care to have, so apologies in advance. Let's count down from worst to best:

6. Hiro Mizushima from Black Butler (2014)

There's a reason no one talks about this movie. It's because it sucks, and somehow I feel I can't really blame Mizushima for his performance, but... it is still a mixture of weird and unmemorable. That hairstyle does him no favors either, but maybe the fact that I find him a little bit frightening to look at should give him points rather than detract them. Off-screen, he looks like a completely normal man; somehow the film's efforts to make him a sexy butler were unfortunately funneled into making him unnerving and unappealing. And the movie is two entire hours long.

There's a lot I've deleted from my memory about the Black Butler live action film, but that lack of memory seems a sign that he should sit in dead last. Whether he's acting like a total weirdo or actually successfully impressing me, Sebastian should never be a forgettable character, and all I can think when I consider Mizushima's performance is that I never need to see it again.

5. Yuya Matsushita from That Butler, Friendship, The Most Beautiful DEATH in the World, and the first run of Lycoris that Blazes the Earth

I know some people may find this placement to be blasphemous, but honestly, the only thing I really like about Yuya's Sebastian is his singing voice, and even then I'm not that wild about it. It's been a few years since I watched TMBDITW, so it's not super crisp in my mind, but I will give him some recognition as an early Sebastian who still had little material to work with. He probably had to do some of his own legwork to adapt the character to the stage and to the original stories he was expected to act in. That can't be easy, and it makes sense that his Sebastian would be one that had to stand somewhat independent from the canon. I also appreciate that he is playing Sebastian with purpose behind his actions and not a sexyman who just serves whatever convenient purpose the narrative dictates, like Mizushima's Seb.

With that caveat out of the way, I still don't like his Sebastian portrayal. It's clear Yuya really drummed up the "I'm no one but I can become anyone" aspect of Sebastian. He can invent personas that suit the situation, like when he decides to seduce Undertaker, but as soon as the problem is solved, he reverts back to being robotic and unsmiling. You get the feeling that he's rather cold and calculating and that he is only interested in doing things that will earn him Ciel's soul. I didn't watch with subtitles, so perhaps that evaluation is misplaced, but his mannerisms dictated that energy to me.

Also, I can't get behind the sort of sexual and romantic tones that sometimes felt present, especially when real children were involved. It will always taint his work for me. There's one song where he and Ciel look at each other the entire time and it's three and a half minutes long but it felt like a year. I wanted to crawl out of my skin because it was so horrifically awkward. Stick this man in fifth.

4. Toshiki Tateishi from The Public School's Secret

So I went into this musical fully prepared to hate Toshiki's performance, considering the act he was following, and... I thought it was actually pretty decent. When I think of Sebastian in the Weston arc, I think of the "sexy professor" angle Yana kept trying to push, and I was worried Toshiki would play into that, especially considering Ciel was being portrayed by a legal adult onstage for the first time. I was pleasantly surprised! That's not what happened at all.

Though likely unintended, I would say Toshiki gives off a rather maternal vibe, behaving more like Seb does in memes: kind of silly, kind of fussy, an overworked single mother who cares for her boy. Toshiki's Sebastian was very attentive of Ciel. He was frequently pleased with his kid's impish nature and didn't seem that annoyed to be taking on extra tasks, only complaining lightly, "Even though I have things to do too!" at the end of the chores song. When Ciel came up with a plan to foil Maurice, Toshiki seemed excited to praise him and gratified to help. He was like Sebastian Lite, only a bit insidious at times, mainly the ever-attentive helper.

To me, it's the first time one of the musicals has made Sebastian feel like a supporting character rather than the driving force behind the story. I prefer when he and Ciel are both treated evenly as protagonists, but I hate it when it's All About Him. I think Toshiki's performance has a good heart and he made me laugh at times. He's not quite canon Sebastian, but I like him. I trust him not to eat the sonboy just yet. Mostly.

3. Daisuke Ono from the Japanese dub of the anime

Daisuke Ono was a part of my first experience with Black Butler, so there's something about his voice that feels like it's just right for Sebastian. And it kind of is. It's a really flexible voice, and one that is clearly giving a performance when you listen to him. He also infuses his dialogue with what sounds to me like inherent smugness, which I think suits Sebastian perfectly. Ono's performance is the most self-satisfied in nature. It makes you think of a well-fed cat licking its chops while it considers its next meal.

His voice is not sexy to me, but I can see why people find it to be. At the same time, Ono isn't afraid to give Sebastian different inflections, even ones that some might consider too embarrassing or OOC for Seb. He's a veteran voice actor and he knows how to do whatever is requested of him. Sebastian treats his career just the same: he too will do essentially whatever Ciel requires. I think Ono is a natural match is what I'm saying, especially having now seen him in person and observing the way he works a crowd so effortlessly.

All that said... Ono's Sebastian is perfect. I don't mean that as a compliment: I mean he's too lacking in flaws. Sure, he has the big flaw (okay with killing a child) but he isn't really giving "silly idiot." Ono's Sebastian is the one the girlies write about in their self-insert fiction. And for the first two seasons, that's kind of who he was supposed to be, so fine. But even when he has silly or idiotic moments, it doesn't feel quite authentic, if that makes sense? I think to Ono, Sebastian's stupid mistakes are just a fluke, quickly corrected. It doesn't feel like they're a fundamental part of who his Sebastian is.

If you consider this nitpicking, you're right! The next two Sebastians are just that good. I still consider Daisuke Ono to be a very talented and accurately-portrayed Sebastian.

2. J. Michael Tatum from the English dub of the anime

While it's possible that I pick up on more nuance in Tatum's performance because he's the only one here who speaks the same language as me, how fortunate we are to have him doing Seb's English voice. He might not actually have a real British accent, but he's just too charming not to love. To me, he has all the vocal command of Ono but is more candid in his delivery. Ono may be Sebastian the perfectionist and Sebastian the performer, but Tatum is Sebastian the butler, well settled and confident in his human role.

I really appreciate the ways you can hear Tatum's voice change notably depending on Sebastian's emotions. This is especially prominent in Book of Atlantic during the flashback sequences: an annoyed Sebastian is an entirely different sounding dude than when he's being cunning, and again when he's being subservient. And he really does have this very silky, ASMR-ass way of speaking that suits Sebastian to a T. It's inherently convincing.

And more to my own interests, Tatum's voice for Sebastian has a really paternal nature to it, and I like that. I think it adds to the complexity of Sebastian's role in Ciel's life when you can hear this caring quality in the voice of a demon that will one day kill the child he works for. He can also be snipped and punctual, and then he can be gentle and reassuring, all in the same scene. And he can be scary too... and I'm super looking forward to hearing how this plays out during season 5.

To compare him to Ono again, I think Tatum knows Sebastian can be an idiot at times, but that quality still takes a backseat to the suaveness. He's almost perfect. And I probably would even say he is perfect, if we hadn't seen perfection itself. As he is, I think Tatum is an excellent voice actor for Sebastian, and I'm grateful that we have him in the position that we do.

1. Yuta Furukawa from the second run of Lycoris that Blazes the Earth, Noah's Ark Circus, and Tango on the Campania

Yuta Furukawa. What a legend. What an icon. This is where I would say "he isn't just playing Sebastian, he is Sebastian," but Furukawa is even more than that. He's what Sebastian should be. And that's not just me being rude to Yana. Yana has flat-out said that Yuta knows Sebastian better than she does herself. She's right.

If you have yet to see Yuta perform, then congratulations: you're in for a treat. What I wouldn't give to forget my first watch of Tango on the Campania and relive that magic all over again. Yuta knows who Sebastian is with every fiber of his being. And the fact that you see him over the course of three plays means you get to witness for yourself how his Sebastian goes from being a smirking demon who lives to impress, to a creature who understands fear, hardship, and pain. And yet you still wonder: is he really learning and growing after all? Or am I too being tricked by this suave being who appears to be emotionally moved?

I'm also proud to report that Yuta plays Sebastian as a true idiot. He says silly things, he behaves in silly ways! He's embarrassing enough to make Ciel roll his eyes, he uses his brawn before his brain, and he's often surprised enough to gasp. He's not afraid to look impressed or astounded or even frightened: he wears his emotions on his sleeves, but he can hide them just as quickly. This Sebastian lives for attention from humans, but what he loves even more is learning from them — perhaps so he can become a better hunter, perhaps so he can become a better scholar. He leaves you wondering which in the most intriguing way.

And I may be biased, but Yuta to me is the most paternal of all the Sebastians. Whether or not a fatherly nature is intended, I'm at least happy to report that his Sebastian is not one romantically inclined towards Ciel. His coworker is an actual child, so there's no reason that should be an acceptable angle anyway, but it really shows in all the little ways he primps at and supports Ciel on-stage. His rapport with Reo is especially adorable and shines through in their every scene.

Not to mention, he's so endlessly entertaining to watch. He has legs for days and he can fuckin groove. He may be playing a demon but he has the voice of an angel. If I called him to my house, he'd probably fix my leaky shower. What can't this gift of a man do??

I could literally go on and on and on for paragraphs. Yana is just the same. We all love Yuta Furukawa, the only Sebastian who is more Sebastian than Sebastian and probably the best thing, in my humble opinion, to come out of the Kuroshitsuji franchise. Thank you, based Yunbastian. We did nothing to deserve you.

[pinkiemachine]

Hey Pinkie,

Could you give me the basic gist of the NTT Team Dynamics, like the different relationships within the team?

Sorry if i'm bombarding you with these asks.

Oh, not at all! I realise I mainly covered individual characters in my previous post, mainly to cut down on time, so I’m happy to flesh things out a bit more! (I’m happy any time someone asks about my work, really 😊)

Okay, so I briefly mentioned Tim and Steph’s relationship, and there’s a lengthier post I did a while back about them, so I’ll link that at the bottom of this post.

Then there’s Tim and Conner. This one’s fun, because sometimes they get along great—Tim has a rebellious side to him, and kind of a skater boy thing going on—but he was also raised by very conservative parents and has Batman for a mentor, and he’s smart enough to know that doing something stupid will lead to stupid consequences, so sometimes (a lot of times) he winds up becoming the Mom™️ of the group. And when that happens, he and Conner come into conflict. Thing is, Conner’s smart in his own ways too, so when he gets into trouble, he’s really good at getting out of trouble, and… he knows how to spin his ideas to convince Tim to go along with them. Basically, it’s like a constant game of “join the dark side, Anakin… we have cookies!” And Steph is usually the one holding the cookies. Then Tim comes to his senses, or Batman shows up, and suddenly he’s all “of course, I—a responsible leader of this team—would never even consider doing the immature thing—cough cough!” But they become good friends. They poke fun at one another a lot, throwing zingers, and they enjoy talking when they get the chance. They just find it easy to vibe with one another.

Unlike…

Conner and Cassie! Now, this is all based off of one comic panel, but I just latched onto this idea like a barnacle to the hull of a crusty ship. Cassie did initially have a crush on Conner when they first met, but that was short-lived because she quickly discovered how annoying Conner can be sometimes. He’s like that little brother who just shows up and—for no reason—starts poking you, flipping the light switch, making noises, and generally just being a pain. Cassie was raised alone with her mother, traveling a bunch, meeting kids from a lot of other cultures, so she knows how to get along with a lot of very different people… she’s still never met someone as annoying as Conner. Plus, her moral compass points toward: being kind to people, being respectful, trying NOT to be annoying. You can see how Conner might just be pushing her buttons in a very specific way when he starts acting a little too much like Lex, and gets carried away. They’re like a cat and a dog. Chasing each other. Screaming at each other. Tim has to intervene. Sigh. But when it counts, of course they’ll always be there for one another… just for no longer than 30 seconds…

Cassie and the other two girls. Now, Cass isn’t particularly older than them by much, but it’s mostly because of her knowledge and confidence mixed with her moral compass that she (generally) is kind of looked at like the leader of the three. But only so much. Again, they’re all about the same age, so it doesn’t feel like she’s the “mom” it’s more like they’re sisters, and she’s the oldest sister… so naturally, Steph intentionally doesn’t listen sometimes. She believes that she’s got enough street smarts of her own (plus Batman’s training) that she and Cassie are on equal footing, which can sometimes lead to arguments, because Cassie feels like her world traveling and being mentored by Wonder Woman gives her more experience than Steph, so… you could say there’s some tension there… Both of them have more experience on Earth than M’gann, so she tends to look up to both of them, and often turns to them for advice. Steph loves playing “mentor” but sometimes Cassie feels like she’s giving the wrong advice (her father being a supervillain doesn’t help Cassie’s opinion, but over the course of the show, we find out that a lot of the members have villainous parents, so it becomes a moot point eventually). Now, it’s not as though Cassie enjoys being in this position of contention. She can be plenty impulsive and adventurous and is a bit of a dork, but it’s funny the way hanging out with certain people can bring out a part of you that you didn’t even know you had. Steph is such a firecracker that it’s impossible for someone not to feel a little apprehensive about what she does and says, but after the girls get to know one another better, their relationship turns from sort of a competition, to more like “partners in crime” almost. Cassie remains the moooore level headed of the two, but yeah… they can get up to trouble if left unsupervised. But with M’gann, Cassie is very sympathetic. She’s traveled, she’s felt like an alien before, she’s been the only white girl in a room before, she gets how M’gann must be feeling. (In truth, she doesn’t quite fully grasp the specifics of her situation, but to be fair, M’gann didn’t tell everyone the specifics up front, so…) Anyway, M’gann appreciates how thoughtful Cassie can be, and often looks to her for advice, especially when it comes to…

Conner and M’gann! Alright, don’t go running for the hills just yet. I know that the Young Justice cartoon scared a lot of us, but trust me when I say that these two characters are not the same ones from that show. Yes, M’gann does see Conner as fitting into the “ideal human boyfriend” category that she’s seen in all those Earth TV shows, but that image usually comes crashing down the minute Conner opens his mouth. Now, they both kinda liked the look of each other the moment they met, but keep in mind, Conner has only actually been alive for about a year or so. Maybe a year and a half—two tops. So, he’s never been in love before. It was never taught to him. He’s just a big ball of raging hormones with no guidance! yaaaaaay… Don’t worry, nothing bad happens, but imagine a six-year-old’s approach to girls… girls he likes… that more or less sums up how Conner first approached things. Very blunt, very innocent, not knowing what’s considered “too forward” or “rude” so he makes a lot of critical errors at first, which he doesn’t realise are errors until he talks to the other guys. Overall, though, his confidence levels remain relatively high, so he plans on adjusting his approach and going in for round two. M’gann feels awkward about the whole situation, like “is this how Earth boys actually are in real life? Is this just a Kryptonian thing? Am I missing something?” She’s overanalysing the situation something awful, and she wonders if it feels wrong because of something she’s doing, or not doing, and she talks to the other girls about it… When Conner actually gets it through his head how to talk to girls, that’s when their relationship starts. He can be very rough and playful, like a big golden retriever, but he’s learned that he needs to be careful with someone like M’gann, who’s more of a sweet little bunny who gets really excited about things, like “Earth Cooking” and “Vending Machines.” The two of them don’t always understand Earth things, or customs, but they’re relieved that the other doesn’t, so they kind of come up with their own private jokes, and it’s really sweet. The great difference between the two is that: Conner is super confident a lot of the time, especially about who he is and where he’s going, but M’gann is exactly the opposite. Over time, he helps her uncover the things that matter most to her, and therefore helps her understand what sort of person she is and who she wants to become.

Conner and Kaldur. Naturally, Kaldur didn’t get close to anyone at first, but after that whole adventure… he and Conner have a very specific relationship. Ever see a cub or a kitten or a puppy trying to play with their mother’s ear or tail or something, but the mom’s just sitting there, looking tired? That’s kinda it. Kaldur finds Conner’s antics amusing, up until they become irresponsible, at which point he shifts into Mom Mode.™️ He and Tim kinda share the title of “Team Mom.” Or maybe one of them’s more like “Team Dad?” You decide. (If everyone starts acting irresponsibly, Kaldur is usually the last adult standing.) Point is, Kaldur is still a battle hardened warrior, and even though he’s learning how to be more expressive, he still thinks Conner can be a bit of a drama queen, and a little too… much… at times. They’re almost a little like Jack O’Niell and Teal’c from Stargate SG-1, if anyone’s seen. But they’re cool, Kaldur doesn’t ever get annoyed with Conner, he simply handles Conner.

In general, Kaldur still has a hard time getting really, really close with the others, mainly just having serious heart-to-hearts or observing their hobbies and interests, but if there was one person on the team I would say he’s close with, it’s Tim. Tim does his best to check in with him and be there for him, as the team’s leader, and they tend to have a lot of very long, very deep conversations. They often go back and forth about battle strategy, they share the title of “Team Mom” a lot, being the two most responsible members, they’re both smart, and they’re both depressed a lot.

(Lol, just had a thought. Kaldur and Steph = Tigress and Po from Kung Fu Panda 2. *Kaldur catches Steph and flips her back around as if she were made of paper* Steph: “Did you guys see that? It’s called being awesome.”)

Now, Steph is the most extroverted in the group. She’s the one who always breaks the ice, who has no problem jumping straight into the deep end, and is the most comfortable chillin’ with the guys. Cassie never really did the whole “hanging with the guys” thing growing up, it was mostly “all the neighbourhood kids or nothing,” so, like, sort of adjacent, but not quite the same thing. Then M’gann never really hung out with guys ever, so Steph is kinda alone on that one. She and Conner are a dangerous duo. They require at least two babysitters. Then, once Bart comes along (post memory wipe, that is) their duo of chaos becomes a trio. NEVER LEAVE THESE THREE ALONE EVER. Steph tries to get close to Kaldur, and tries to introduce him to certain fun things, but for a long while she just can’t understand why they aren’t clicking, and why he and Tim do it so easily. Then, she realises that what Kaldur values is genuine conversation and connection, which is harder for her, but they wind up sharing a few moments together that help them bond a bit more.

Now Bart. I saved him for last because it’s a little confusing having to talk about two different versions of him. Pre-memory wipe, Bart is afraid, anxious, and thinks like a little kid. Being trapped in a computer for a year tends to stunt you like that. So when he first arrives, after the NTT’s initial suspicion subsides, they kinda adopt him. He’s never had his own bedroom, or owned normal civilian clothes, or eaten anything besides rations, (bacon was an eye opener), so the team can’t help but feel bad for him, though Conner specifically tends to feel like he’s a little bit like dead weight at times during their journey through time, because he’s too afraid to actually do anything for much of it. Put simply, the main form of bonding that happens with them all on that adventure is: trauma bonding. But then, there’s post-memory wipe Bart. After the wipe, his personality changed. He still naturally feels disquieted and repelled by tech, but beyond that, he’s more cheerful, funny, always moving too fast for his own good, forgetful, but with a bit of an attitude when he feels like it. Especially when people give him “the look.” Something he noticed after the memory wipe. People who knew him before sometimes look at him like he’s a wounded puppy, and he hates it. This is what eventually leads him to want to regain his memories, but that’s a story for another time. Like mentioned earlier, he gets along a little too well with Conner and Stephanie—he can drive Tim up a wall with how much he doesn’t sit still, or listen, or just… do the thing he asked him to do twenty minutes ago! But Bart’s a good kid, Tim can’t stay frustrated with him forever. Kaldur has another child to reign in. Cassie takes on an almost “big sister” role for him, and M’gann loves testing out new Earth recipes on him, because he’ll eat anything.

Alright, I think that’s everyone. Please don’t hesitate to ask more questions! Always love getting to share!

Tim and Steph’s relationship 👇

[necromancerkisses]

I have some thoughts headcannons about De Riva Rook (any gender), specifically their background under Viago.

In the character creation menu when choosing your faction, it states that Rook hasn’t been a full-fledged crow for very long. For this thought process’ sake, let’s say a couple years. As far as I’m aware (based upon some google searches and what I know from previous games/ in-game dialogue) the training to become a crow is tedious, and takes at least 5-10 years. In my headcannon for my crow Rook, I think she’s around 26. That means that she’s been training to be a crow since she was between 13 and 18.

It’s mentioned multiple times that Rook and Viago have a very interesting relationship. He seems to have been their mentor, as he somewhat(?) is to Jacobus. I’ve seen some beautiful found family and complicated relationship headcannons from people on tumblr and TikTok respectively, and for my Rook I’d like to think it’s something like that. However, why does Viago seem so particularly critical of Rook? Everyone— Teia, Lucanis, Illario, and I think even some other minor characters make commentary on this. I understand that Rook is the main character, why would we hear about some rando crow that has nothing to do with the storyline? I digress.

I’m choosing to take that and run with it. In my headcannon, not only does Viago see himself in Rook, he truly wants them to be a master assassin and possibly reach as close to Talon status as possible. I’d like to think that this means he was incredibly harsh during their trainings together. No missteps, truly anything less than perfection wasn’t good enough for him.

I’ve also had a thought floating around about what (other than knife-wielding, magic if they’re a mage, poison, concealing themselves, etc.) creative aspects went into Rook’s training. Although this is arguably for a better cause, what if some of their training matched that of the Black Widows from marvel? Not the brainwashing and being literal puppets for a Big Bad™️, but the drill-like lessons? Some sort of conditioning to desensitize killing? Dancing? And on that point, party members will comment on Lucanis’s fighting looking like a dance. So, I’m imagining a somewhat disgruntled Rook having to learn ballet at the ripe age of 13 because it helps with movement, flexibility, control, and discipline. This is feeding into the fact that maybe all crows had to do this (hence the comments about Lucanis), but because of what I’ve already said, Viago was much harsher about Rook’s lines being straight, toes being pointed, and having total control of their muscles and bodily movements. I’m literally picturing Viago standing at the front of a room with his arms crossed shouting “AGAIN!” at a lone Rook who did not live up to his standards for whatever ballet combination he’s having them do.

This is not at all under the assumption that Viago doesn’t care for Rook. He does, deeply. But because of the possible personal connotations of Rook being under his guidance, he feels that a harsh hand is best for them. And, it kind of proves to be? I mean, yeah you start the game with the knowledge that Rook has been lowkey ‘suspended’ from whatever faction you choose, but that could literally tie into Viago being a little too harsh on them. Rook becomes the savior of all of Thedas— if not the world, so…maybe all the ballet that they dreaded and shiver if they linger on a memory about for too long was for good reason.

I dunno. I had a lot of thoughts. I feel like I could go even further into them, but I also might save that for some prequel De Riva Rook fics/ headcannon list.

Also, if anyone else has had this thought or would like to discuss I am all ears (and all yap). I haven’t seen anything like this and I couldn’t not share it with the possibility of discussion— and I’m totally welcome to criticism as well! I know not everyone has the same headcannons for their own Rooks and that’s totally fine!

[mitternacht]

UU Appreciation Week Day 1: A negator you appreciate

Of course I was gonna sit here and yell about Rip! I’m still fairly new here but I have so much to say about him and his character, I ran out of time to do any sort of proper fic or anything so I’ll stick to what I do when all else fails and that’s write Too Much Meta™️ about my faves. So here is a bit of that.

The rest under the cut for spoilers!

Rip Tristan, where do I even start.

The tragedy of someone whose entire life was decided for him as a child, who never had any choice but to continue trying to carry out the singular goal he’s had since he was young and will be forever haunted by that. The constant visual symbolism of him not being able to escape his child self in Loop 100, the constant reminder that he’s changed and he’s betrayed everything he used to stand for. The cover for 175 in Loop 101, the entirety of chapter 176 finally allowing him to make peace with his inner child as he’s been given the chance to finally keep the promises he’s been holding in himself for so long.

The tragedy of a doctor turned weapon, no longer able to use his hands to save or heal, only to kill and maim. Blades used for saving lives only now good for taking them. The ever constant betrayal of himself and his ideals, of his deeply internalized need to help and save people, all in the name of love. Someone who was once willing to do anything to save the lives in front of him now willing to sacrifice quite literally everything around him for the sake of seeing the one he loves again.

The tragedy of someone who doesn’t realize the love in front of him until it’s too late. So blinded by the love he would sacrifice everything for that he didn’t recognize the love that would sacrifice everything for him.

The tragedy of someone so kind becoming someone willing to let the entire world burn without remorse, for love.

And that kindness that occasionally shines through in Loop 100 is genuinely what saves him in the end, going into Loop 101. And the few times he’s thrown aside his own goals and objectives to rush into trying to save a life don’t go unnoticed by those around him (aka trying to save Anno after using Life is Strange on him, and when Fuuko was stabbed by Unruin he immediately ran to her and started trying to figure out how to save her)

Has anyone ever talked about how the handgun Rip gives to Fuuko and ends up letting her keep after the Autumn arc becomes one of her main tools of offense and self defense going into Loop 101, and how she’s built an entire fighting style around it?

Have we talked about the way that Rip (in Loop 100 specifically) actively avoids direct physical contact with those he doesn’t want to hurt, unless absolutely necessary? And the way this parallels Fuuko, the way she might see a bit of herself in him? Rip in Loop 100 is so careful to avoid touching Lucy after saving her from Unruin, and it’s such a sad contrast to how affectionate he is in Loop 101 before Unrepair manifests.

The ways in which Rip and Andy also foil each other, the way they both begin Loop 100 trying to handle everything theirselves, not letting others share their burden. The ways in which they will both in the most literal sense sacrifice life and limb for the ones they love. The way we see both of them slowly take that next step forward, learning to let others shoulder the weight they carry (Rip took a whole loop to learn how to do this, but better late than never).

Rip was never supposed to be a villain, and he’s never written to be one which I adore. He tries so hard to portray himself as one in the beginning, but his true nature always ends up shining through, for the better.

I also adore so much the ways in which he will fight to keep holding on to the people he loves, regardless of whether anyone else in his life approves. He’s fought so hard to achieve his dreams, and I’m obsessed with his absolute refusal to give any of it up. He’s a bit of an idealist, of a romanticist, but he’s always proven to back that up with his actions and words.

He’s a beautifully written character with such a lovely storyline and it’s made me so happy to see him finally getting to exist as his truest self in Loop 101. He’s so full of love and light and I hope with every fiber of my being his story ends on a positive note.

I also need to give an honorary mention to Latla, because she is my queen and she is such a force of nature, I love her to bits.

[blakbonnet]

curious about your favorite underrated artists/fic writers/creatives on here?? and maybe your specific favourite underrated fanwork??

Ooh. I love this question so much, anon ❤️

Underrated gif maker, and I say this with no bias, is definitely Ida @bizarrelittlemew because she just puts in so much effort in all her gifs. Ida looks through tutorials and then also does so much on their own, but mainly: if you look at all the recent gifs, they have such a unique Ida ™️ vibe to them. From rotoscoping (still don't know what that is) to playing with blending, Ida deserves to be right up there with one of the most creative gifmakers this fandom has produced recently.

Unfortunately I just very very rarely hang out reading ofmd fics T-T (I'm mostly in the hobbit and sandman fandom side of ao3) and there are a few writers I love and I tend to stick to them (xoxoemynn, forpiratereasons being the main ones) Most of what I read and like in the fandom is when a mutual ends up writing something that isn't modern au.

Having said that, underrated writer to me 100% is @palavapeite because their writing just never fails to transport me to whatever setting they're talking about. Listen, I just don't read modern AUs, they don't do it for me (def a me issue, I'm sure there are brilliant modern au writers in this fandom but it's something I filter out) but I would absolutely recommend this fic as something that brought me so so much joy, is fast becoming my more reread fic, because it did a perfect job with getting Stede's voice right. I can hear every single thing he says in my mind, it's SO good. Also their fic with priest!stede lives rent free in my head and I would soon find the time to read their non blackbonnet fics.

Another one is adamarks who, again, has such a good grasp on Ed and Stede's character that it doesn't matter which AU Jay has picked, it just always always works somehow. My favourite is this fic tho which is just so them that I might as well weep.

For artists, my recent faves (and I think they're underrated) are Lilo @harrylovesspaezle who's so so talented and I still can't get over that sketchbook tour - the growth and love for this show ough, @ofmderapolag whose pieces are just so so dreamy, and also @spookynadja whose style just floors me every single time.

I'd also like to shout out one underrated category, people who write such amazing text posts like @ourfag who obviously has the s3 scripts and is only sharing them with us in small increments due to the nda and @tulipseason for the currently unpublished book of "1 million ways I will articulate how much I love hit television show our flag means death"

and then there's my favourite most beloved cheerleaders who are always lifting up new writers and artists too like @marbledwings and @insteading ❤️ I especially love that everyone has a beautiful story with these two, you could ask any small or big writer in the fandom if they've been made to cry by wings or insteading and yeah, they're just lovely.

[professorwerewolfmcwerewolf]

Okay, I have an idea. Gotta admit, first, I haven't watched most of Chicago PD (or Med but that's not relevant here. I've seen all of Fire). I was already in love with the Halsteads and now I've fallen in love with Mouse as a character. I also fully blame @kitweewoos and @gregorygerwitz for that. And I'm not sure if y'all's hc of Mouse's parents being rich and having disowned him is just a hc or somewhat implied in canon, but it's fully canon in my brain.

Alright. My idea. When Mouse starts to get restless being part of the unit, his initial thought is still reenlisting because that's familiar. And Voight tightening the fucking leash just totally reconfirms the need to get out. But then for some reason or another. (maybe Moustead happens and he can't bring himself to leave Jay even if he has to leave the unit. Maybe he gets to talking to Severide or Hermann or any of our 51 firefighters at Molly's.)

He starts looking into the CFD. He would still need his record cleared. But even if Platt had had hesitation, uh clearing his record so he can join the fire academy? *(calls Mouch)* Babe, I got you a veteran to join the cfd! He already comes with a nickname!

And so Mouse signs up for the next like available opening in the academy. And with a sus amount of luck *(side eyes Sargeant Platt)*, his number's called the same year. He's hopeful. The lack of gunfire is a relief as much as a bummer, but it's not a deterrent. And he isn't 100% sure how he'll do if he gets too close to explosion or gets a serious injury, but he'd have that same uncertainty overseas, just extra likely. And, of course, Jay is thrilled. Voight isn't, but he also isn't acting as much like a toddler because he has to respect the CFD. But Jay's thrilled that Mouse isn't trying to put himself through That™️ again. He feels guilty for a bit when he thinks maybe Mouse dropped the reenlisting idea just to placate him, but Mouse tells him it was just his first idea.

So Mouse goes through the fire academy, fucking excels. The soldier-like bits are like coming home. This he knows. This he can do. Sure, he might need to fill his free time with stuff to use his tech skills so boredom never leads him to hack the wrong shit while tipsy, but he would've done that anyway. He's not even opposed to helping out the unit, but only when they actually just can't figure it out themselves.

Fresh out of the academy, he obviously becomes a candidate at Firehouse 51. Do they need one right now? Don't care. They're getting Mouse. They need a new stray, and he needs a bigger family than just Jay and Will via Jay. Okay, I just checked the timeline, and Mouse's last CPD episode was conveniently at the same time as Jimmy Borelli's uhhh incident 🔥🫠 in October 2016. So, 51 does, in fact, need a candidate. 🫢😅

Humor in the tags. But seriously. Mouse can't decide if he absolutely hates them trying to include him in stuff (because past experiences say this is a lie and they wanna lure him into a false sense of security before being shit, despite the fact they've never individually given him bad vibes before) or desperately wants to do good to feel like he deserves them.

This part specifically applies to the Gerwitz-family-being-rich hc: It doesn't take the house long to piece together Gerwitz, and that Mouse isn't involved in his parents' lives. But you know Otis. Otis is Otis. Mouse is a candidate. So naturally, he's gonna joke about it. Mouse is fine at first, just acts like he didn't hear him or just glares or walks away, and everyone else has the decency not to laugh if it's the latter two reactions. Otis continues. Until one day, he jokingly implies nepotism. Mouse stops him in the locker room. "Listen, funny guy. I get this. The hazing is part of the job. It's fine. And you have plenty of material to work with. You wanna joke about my service, my addiction, working for the intelligence unit, my friendship with Jay? I don't care. But you make another crack about nepotism like my parents gave a single fuck about me after I wasn't their perfect little socialite? Like I wasn't fully disowned and cut off? That's a fight you won't win, Zvonecek." And his pronunciation of Otis' last name being perfect is oddly the sticking point for him. Otis is a bit butt hurt for a few days, but accepts the honesty and threat as good enough reason to back off on that topic.

[tenderhungering]

howdy howdy!!! do u have any thoughts on jack’s background? I think it’s really interesting the few tidbits we have (Illinois Boy™️, the Oh Calcutta story, getting his start in radio) + in the case of those first two its like. clearly been told time and time again for an audience. or if you’d prefer something else any thoughts on minnie 🙏😭 haunting the narrative icon

hello hello ! i so wish we’d gotten a little bit more about him but i’ve always imagined jack as being a little more introverted in his younger years? i think he really enjoys validation and this is such a difficult thing to achieve as someone as slightly awkward as jack. (don’t know why. maybe i just enjoy pathetic men but his blushing at naked bodies and his little “oh! not my chair!” has always made me feel like he has had to build up this persona he has made for himself) charming and quick-witted but very easily crumbles whenever he’s in an uncomfortable position (he seems to almost dissociate often?)

i think he might’ve been in some sort of college radio and broadcast (i’ve discussed this with a friend before!), and he was just so happy to build an audience. there’s no mention of his parents (my memory is foggy!) so part of me thinks that they’re either not in the picture or he’s lost them? so you know,,, mommy and daddy issues galore despite either one. maybe even one of them didn’t think being someone on television would maintain a steady flow of income. regardless, it might make him more interested in gaining that connection with the audience, getting validated for his feelings. getting praise for it. no you’re so cool please continue to make your show! i’m such a big fan!

he doesn’t know who is there for him as Mr. Midnight and who is there for him Jack Delroy so he blurs the line and vents to his audience, looks at the camera with every intention to impress.

i imagine meeting minnie was very sweet though. they were both sort of up and coming and it’s nice to have someone who understands that struggle! i imagine minnie being in theatre makes her the more extroverted out of the two ! (she was the one sharing stories and jack getting shy about them!), but also a lot more open about her emotions. jack seems like someone who keeps to himself and doesn’t quite understand how to communicate well (he does hide a lot from others when they ask what’s going on. might just be that 70s toxic masculinity upbringing that makes him unable to express these,, daddy issues? who knows!)

i do fully believe he loved her though! younger jack probably never dreamed of finding a girl like minnie. maybe a bit of idealization for her occurred earlier on but minnie was so fresh and bright and full of life even during her time spent ill that i always thought she just good humor and a knack for just being naturally talented at the arts.

which is a big difference between the two! minnie just had that spark of life, she was always going to end up being someone big, she knew how to capture a room. jack was awkward and had to find his voice, he had to learn what people liked, what good jokes landed and how to deliver them, he had to work hard (and i don’t mean this as minnie not working hard! jack just had to work to become this persona while minnie was able to become her characters almost immediately, she’s able to understand their emotions and feel for them immediately. i think it makes her a much more empathetic person while jack is a lot more sympathetic. jack needs to be verbally told what people are feeling which might be why ratings are so comforting. they’re either good or bad! they’re easy to read.) and become who we know as Mr. Midnight. something of an artist obsessed with not their craft but what their craft will mean to others

sorry if this wasn’t exactly background stuff pfft! i more so focused on how their personalities were! i do think that minnie was possibly in dance, and has that ability to be able to play a song after she hears it on time on the piano. i think she has to teach jack how to pick up on it though, he’s sort of stumbling and his keys are sour baha. he probably used to stay up late studying little mannerisms talk shows had. i think he has a natural charm to him but that charm is a lot more meek than what we see? i love them both dearly,,,

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

i’m sorry but why was i supposed to find out that the apothecary diaries (2023) are an absolute banger on my own???

it’s very reminiscent of sugar apple fairy tale (2023) for some reason, but the roles are reversed - the main male love interest is golden-retriever incarnated and the main protagonist is the CEO of bad bitches™️

(Challe fen Challe, my beloved, you have never done nothing wrong in your fkn life and i think about you literally every single day)

(Anne Halford, would you do me the extraordinary honor of becoming my wifey~)

A N Y W A Y

i’m on episodes 6-9 atm and i’m fucking ROLLING

i’d jump in front a bullet for Xiaomao, i’d squish her cheeks and give her all the love and delicious food she deserves for her hard fucking work

Xiao Mao is such a cute nickname btw

Master of turning unfortunate circumstances (uhm, fkn kidnapping for example) into her bitch

this girl is the CEO of if you touch me without my consent and i will castrate you second time around™️

also CEO of I’ll get what I want & it’s just a matter of time™️, master of tactics & negotiations, she plays 4D chess with everyone in the palace

MAOMAO WHY YOU GOBBLE ALL THE POISON LIKE IT’S FOREPLAY- STOP-

this bitch doesn’t fuck around

WHY IS SHE GOBBLING THE FOOD AGAIN, SOMEONE STOP HER-

why do you think jinshin is fooling around boy, i mean we don’t mind but GIRL HAVE YOU SEEN HOW THIS MAN GAWKS AT YOU-

JINSHIN MY MAN 🙏🏻

please pray with me in his name, this masochist clearly needs it

his masochism makes my eyes widen in shock, someone slap this clueless puppy out of it, SOMEONE GIVE HIM A FUCKING CLUE CUZ HE LOST ALL HIS MARBLES

NO SERIOUSLY YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND-

this man hadn’t had a single thought penetrate that thick handsome skull ever in his life and he’s so real for that

this man is the CEO of no thoughts head empty™️ and he carries all the himbo energy on his back alone

his head is so empty he’s one of the rare competitors for the king of thoughtless idiots™️, Howl Pendragon himself

if Xiaomao and Jinshin won’t form a fucking power couple i might commit tax evasion or sue the studio

LIHAKU, YOU DESERVE THE WORLD-

(side characters earn 10/10 rating, i actually didn’t expect the concubines being so nice and interesting)

I highly recommend this anime. It doesn’t follow shoujo tropes to the dot, but the romance is ✨brewing ✨. The plot is overarching, but each episode has its small little mystery than you can try to solve along (girl, the theories I came up with and was deadass wrong-). I’m watching the dubbed version since I’m working on the side and I SWEAR IT’S SO FUCKING GREAT. I caught myself cackling on occasions.

[thejujvtsupost]

When the World Comes Crashing Down…

This is my first Itafushi post, and non-insert post. I really thought this would turn out longer than it did but I got too emotional tbh. Which was disappointing bc it felt like I was writing for ages. I also chose a different aesthetic for my dividers, my usual cutesy ones don’t really fit here lmao✌️🤠 Manga spoilers past chapter 212

Notes: Itafushi, hurt, so much angst, self loathing, major character death(s), end comfort but everything is not okay™️, discussions about not wanting to live, low self worth and trauma/culling games aftermath.

Megumi Fushiguro no longer wants to live.

Megumi Fushiguro, who let his guard down at the worst moment. All in the name of stupid emotions he didn’t deserve to have.

Megumi Fushiguro, the only person capable of destroying everything precious to him so quickly.

Megumi Fushiguro let himself be taken over, he let himself become a puppet to a monster- the same monster that killed his sister. The same monster that killed Gojo, his father figure. The same monster that ripped out his love’s heart right in front of him those months ago.

Megumi Fushiguro, the boy everyone left behind. His mother died, who cares about his father that left on his own, the sorry excuse of a parent his stepmother was- at least she gave him Tsumiki. Yet, he failed her… Tsumiki died in the world she had no business being part of. The world he joined so he could protect her. He failed.

Megumi Fushiguro, whose thoughts were interrupted by the presence of another- which shouldn’t be possible while he was in this state of limbo he prayed would end every day.

Megumi Fushiguro recognized the energy in front of him, how could he not? His love, Yuuji Itadori, was his only remaining tether to the earth. And he had hurt Yuuji too. Not only did he eat his finger, he’s seen how roughly Sukuna has treated him during this battle.

“Fushiguro! Get up, it’s time to fight back and end this!”

Megumi Fushiguro was unable to do anything besides stay crumpled on the ground, begging for everything to end. “I can’t, I’ve had enough…” He couldn’t even look his love in the eye. He didn’t deserve to, he didn’t deserve the love Yuuji gave, the love they had yet to put a label on and now never would.

“Get up! Get up so you can live! You’re our only chance, look at me Fushiguro. My time is almost up here, we need you!” And Yuuji did sound desperate, but if he met his eyes he might fall to his will.

Megumi Fushiguro felt a hand on his cheek, forcing him to open his eyes and let out a sob at the sight. Yuuji was bleeding, but he really was right there in front of him…

“We need you. I need you ‘gumi, please? You’re strong enough for it. I know you are.” He felt a kiss on his forehead before the presence vanished.

Megumi Fushiguro, who wanted to die when Yuuji left him, once again, alone in limbo. He wanted to die but he didn’t want to be alone. And if he died, would he be alone forever? Would his suffering ever end or would the crushing pain continue? What happened to Jujutsu sorcerers in the afterlife?

Megumi Fushiguro, then made the decision to go where he wouldn’t be alone. He would go where he could have companionship, comfort, even if not everyone would be there to greet him. Even if his world had crashed and burned.

Megumi Fushiguro got to his feet, though it took several tries, and made his way to a door he didn’t know was there all along; that he would have seen had his fog lifted sooner.

And everything was brighter than the sun, unbearable and beyond painful, until there was nothing. Absolute nothingness as he fell unconscious- oh…

Megumi Fushiguro, who woke up in a familiar room. The too well-lit clinic of Shoko Ieiri, with his own heart beat loud, coming from a monitor to his left.

Megumi Fushiguro, who then groaned and properly opened his eyes to the world.

Megumi Fushiguro, who heard the grating noise of Satoru Gojo’s chatter- and the sight of him sitting up in bed. Of course he had the audacity of eating pudding and making a no doubt annoying comment that he couldn’t quite comprehend all the words off. But he’d let Gojo be annoying, because it meant Gojo was alive. Alive and not cut in half by his own hand.

“Damnnnn I thought you’d take longer to wake up, now I owe your boyfriend money. Quick, go back to sleep before he notices and we’ll pretend this never happened.”

Megumi Fushiguro caught a few words, Boyfriend?

Megumi Fushiguro, whose hand was weighed down by one of his pink haired love’s own.

Megumi Fushiguro managed, against his will, to blush. Yuuji was knocked out at his bedside, slumped over the edge of the bed and lightly snoring. Good. God knows how long he’s been awake…

Megumi Fushiguro lost many people, good people that didn’t deserve to die. People that shouldn’t have died so young.

“Alright alright, you’re obviously not going back to sleep I guess. YUUUUUUUUJI YOUR LOVER’S AWAKE!” And Yuuji jerked awake with a snort and looked around, as if he was trying to discern where the fire was- then smiled at him so big…

Megumi Fushiguro let a few tears drop (also against his will) because maybe he lost many, but he did still have people to care about him. He really did.

Megumi Fushiguro wasn’t alone.

Megumi Fushiguro was gonna be okay. Definitely not now, but eventually…

Megumi Fushiguro decided he would live.

Thinking about making a request? Check my bio to see if they’re open!

[alloveydovey]

Hellooooo, dramas from this past month :) I had a lot of fun watching most of these, which hadn't been happening lately.

The Story of Park’s Marriage Contract, 2023 (kdrama) 7.5/8

A woman from the past travels to the future where she meets a man who resembles her deceased husband. In need of a wife, he strikes a contract with her, and blah blah blah, you know what happens next.

The chemistry was there 100%, the comedy too, but overall, I think it was just a mid watch for me. I was three episodes away from finishing but was struggling big time because I was getting bored.

The Romance of Tiger and Rose, 2020 (cdrama) 8

A scriptwriter ends up inside her own creation as a side character who dies early on in the drama and has a really bad reputation.

This was hilarious. Laughing out loud alone type of hilarious. It didn't make any sense at all, and it was extremely silly and sometimes even frustrating, but both actors were so great with the comedy (Zhao Lusi the actress that you are), so everything was just fun and romantic and cute... and weird enough, emotional af as well. I love these types of dramas where, after watching, you kinda feel empty inside lol. Comfort drama material? 100%

My Demon, 2023/24 (kdrama) 8

A demon becomes powerless after crossing paths with a cold heiress (who he obviously knew in their, guess what? Yes, past lives)

Kim Yoo Jung and Song Kang (his character is everything) were so cute in this! Their chemistry was definitely chemistring. I loved the concept and all, but for some reason, I couldn’t put my whole heart into this drama, which resulted in me being a bit disappointed. I’d get bored sometimes. I still don’t know if it’s my problem though. Maybe it wasn't the right time to watch it since I had been watching so many dramas with similar storylines. I’ll give them this, though, these two were truly a comedic duo™️

My Man is Cupid, 2023/24 (kdrama) 8

A love fairy accidentally shoots himself with an arrow and ends up in love with a human, condemning him and his group of cupids to 500 years on Earth. In modern day, he gets entangled with a veterinarian who might be connected to what happened in the past. Also! Murder mystery.

This one just goes to prove that liking a drama is all about vibes for me. Is this different from what I’ve been watching? Nope. It’s not better than the other ones above with similar premises. Yet somehow, unlike the others, it got my attention way more, and I totally binged it. Even when this particular one had some very confusing, probably so-so writing, moments. Granted, it has Nana in it. Nana makes everything worth it (Jang Dong Yoon was cute as well lol).

My Girlfriend is a Gumiho, 2010 (kdrama) (rewatch!) 7.5 ⭐️

A cute gumiho saves an irresponsible rich kid who wants to become an action star by giving him her bead. Both of them gotta stick together while he heals.

Like I said back when I first saw this, COMFORT!! And I was in the mood for something silly and sweet after the same themes over and over again. I can't get over how cute Shin Min A and Lee Seung Gi are in this.

Falling Into You, 2022 (cdrama) 9

A student-athlete wants to do high jump but doesn't have the required height for the sport, so a postgraduate student-coach decides to take him under her wing and train him. Noona love story ensues.

So... I have a lot of mixed feelings about it because, all in all, I think this is one of the best cdramas I've watched. It's beautifully shot, the music is incredible, and the pacing, story, characters, and acting are all impeccable. Aside from Meet Yourself (fav ever) it's truly one of the most naturally acted cdramas I've seen so far as well. Even outside the romance part, everything was really good.

Now, was it inappropriate? For me, at least, I think it was. This young student is supposed to be 20, and his coach is said to be about to turn 28. They are both consenting adults (let's put it that way), but the power dynamics thing is still there. Overall, it was a nice surprise, and I completely binged it.

Welcome to Samdal-ri, 2023/24 (kdrama) 9

After a scandal, a famous photographer runs back to her hometown. Her ex, with whom she had an intense fallout (childhood friends to lovers), is there, and it seems like neither of them has moved on. (Also about family, and grief)

From the moment I saw Shin Hye Sun and Ji Chang Wook's pictures next to one another on a tweet saying they were going to be in a new drama together, I knew this was going to be a 10/10 in my books. Maximized joint slay. Add the hometown cha cha cha vibes, and you have an amazing tear-jerker drama. The rest of the cast is a great complement as well; their acting and their stories just make everything really emotional (I cried a lot lol), but it is 100% worth the watch. I'll be honest about one thing, though. As much as I loved it, it took me a while to finish the last two episodes cause I feel like they dragged the story a bit.

Princess Hours/Goong, 2006 (kdrama) 8

In a reimagined modern SK, a girl from an ordinary family gets hitched to the crown prince because of a promise both of their grandparents made in the past. A Diana x Charles x Camilla drama ensues (but like, with a happy ending).

This is what I like to call DRAMA™️. The type you hate everyone's behaviors, and you laugh, and you hate the ML, but you also want him to get with the FL, and you start hate watching, and then you giggle when they share moments and completely forget ML is a really shitty person lol. I started this cause I got sick, and I got way into it. ML being a major asshole and the FL having no self-respect (like the good old dramas and telenovelas) aside, I enjoyed binging this, and I can see why it was so popular. Their romance, though deeply flawed and a product of the time the drama was made, had some great moments, slow burn and natural as well. I was lowkey hoping for a happier ending, tho, but it was cute enough. Also, music bro, that main song is never getting out of my head. Comfort drama material: 100%

Playful Kiss, 2010 (kdrama) 5

FL confesses to ML, and he rejects her harshly. When her house collapses, her father moves them in with an old friend, who ends up being ML's father.

So after Goong, I thought I'd probably be able to watch this. Wrong. Shin's got nothing wrong in comparison so Seung Jo. Seung Jo is probably my most disliked ML ever lol. I binged this, hoping it'd get better, or just like Shin in Goong, he'd change a bit after getting together with FL. But nope, he remained an asshole throughout the whole thing. Gotta love that consistency. Comfort drama material: 1% (I saw the comments on Viki, and I don't know how people rewatched this, lol.)

[edupunkn00b]

Hey hey Edu! I am having a day™️today and I have been thinking about why it is so hard for me to reread "What Might Have Been", but not "The Uses of Adversity"

Buckle up, there are spoilers for anyone who somehow has not read those masterpieces already

So, I think, I figured out my difficulty with WMHB is that at the core, I can barely cope with how much Remus spirals in that fic. The way he loses his grasp on himself more and more, the way his mind offers him another reality to deal with the how his life is getting out of order just- it did blindside me. Not because it's unrealistic or because you wrote it badly.

I think it just took me so off-guard after reading Happily Ever After where Remus, may have struggled but ended up helping Logan so often. Like, there is this underlying strength in his character that I adored. This hope and playfulness that never seized to show up.

And then he falls apart. It all falls apart and shatters. And I know that people do that. I know that characters do that and that it creates so much more interesting stories.

Later in different tidbits you show us how Remus was, versions of Remus and how he self-destructed before. You showed us better versions of himself, where he gets help earlier, chooses different paths, is able to choose different paths.

So it makes sense that he spirals, gets worse than ever before.

It just hurts so much because to me, it felt like he had it already. It felt like he was out of the woods. It felt like he had gotten better and was stronger than this. But the problem is that healing isn't linear. Sometimes you don't heal at all. Sometimes you just deal with the chipped state you're in.

And I think that was the thing that hurt. That Remus wasn't broken, but chipped. He seemed fine. He seemed to be doing well, to adjust, to grow. But he wasn't really broken, he was just chipped. He is chipped. And that is not something to be fixed but to be dealt with. And it's exhausting and tiresome if you don't know how to do it or have lost the motivation to do it.

But in TUoA we have Logan. And this version of Logan, who has suffered so much and is hurt and fearful and so very much in pain is less painful for me to see than WMHB Remus could ever be. Because that Logan has been broken. That Logan has been irreparably changed and will never be the same again.

And yet. And yet he gets the chance to become someone new. He gets the chance to be put back together in a new way. He gets to have Roman by his side, who looks at his broken pieces with love and care and is with him anyway.

And I think that hit less hard than what happened with Remus and feels more hopeful to me even though I understand that there is much more to come for Logan in that universe. But maybe, he'll be spared to have his son admitted to a mental hospital. Maybe he'll he spared to see his love fall apart because of something he couldn't have.

Maybe at least this portion of his life ends up being gentler than what WMHB would have given him.

Yeah.

I am very normal about your fics.

Kudos.

First of all, all the hugs in the world for you, Eir <3. You are beautiful inside and out and I hope you know that your stories touch me in so many of the same ways you're describing. (Most especially Life on Crow Avenue and Words Are Hard.) <3

I first read your note last night and had to sit with it because you're right, at the core of Remus' journey in What Might Have Been is the terrible truth that mental illness doesn't just go away. It can be managed to varying levels but it won't ever simply 'heal' like a cold or a broken leg. It's always there with us.

That was a difficult lesson for me to learn and one I'm probably still learning. I knew it intellectually but there have been times when life decided I needed to really learn it.

So many of us are those chipped cups, sitting on a shelf or serving some purpose. Just like those chipped cups, some of us break more easily than someone who has never been cracked and we do require extra care.

When I wrote Happily Ever After, I intended it to be a fairy tale. A fantasy, my fantasy, of what my life could have been like had I had friends like Janus and Roman in my life during my darkest times. Of how much stronger and better I could be if I'd had the support they gave him over the years.

I structured it like a fairy tale, took every chapter title from the first line of famous books. Logan started the story sad but unbroken, still surrounded by love and support. He ended the story discovering what I discovered about my self, ended the story with love for him and promising futures for his children. It was my dream fairy tale ending.

And it was completely unrealistic.

After sitting with the story for bit, I wanted to see how that might have actually happened, what a real ending to Logan's story might have been like, because if I could make Logan's fairy tale ending more realistic, I could make it realistic for me, too. That if in the more realistic version when Remus couldn't just bounce back again this time, if in even that version, he and Logan (and Janus and Roman and all of them) could still find a happy ending, I knew I could, too.

The Uses of Adversity is the same tale but backwards. What could possibly lead Logan to a happy ending when he started without Janus as a friend? The first part of TUoA, It Could Always Be Worse was very dark and was nearly even darker. I wasn't sure how it would end until I got to the last chapter. The original tags included an "author chose not to use Archive warnings" tag because that story nearly ended very differently.

Strangely, The Uses of Adversity, as straightforward as Logan and Roman's love story was, was much harder to write than WMHB or any of the other tales.

I hope that for every person who can't ever go back to WMHB, there's a person who reads it and can see that happy endings aren't just for fairy tales. That we can go through it all and still find a way to happiness in the end. That, chipped and broken and spiraling, there's always another chance for us to pick ourselves up or to allow ourselves be picked up, and keep on going toward a place of warmth and joy.

No matter what we've been through, it's never too late to build joyful connections with other people. It's never too late for a happy ending.

[bookishfeylin]

Okay this will be a rant so I'm sorry but I have opinions! And the world needs to know them. So I was thinking how SJM has overused "trauma" in ACOTAR to a point that now it just makes me cover my ears lol.

The reason Feyre went from not wanting to have children because she was parentified at young age and now just wanted to be free?✨TRAUMA✨ She felt her mate die and so she's scared they might not get time again and so it's a decision born out of that fear. Without Feyre would've not considered it.

Why Nesta and Elain become Fae and get absorbed into Feyre's world and become a part of IC?✨TRAUMA✨ they just had to go through a traumatic experience of being violently boiled alive and have their bodies changed. Otherwise they would've never wanted to be a part of the Fae world. They were way more adjusted to the human world than Feyre ever was.

Why Nesta was alone in HoW with Cassian as her keeper and became a warrior ™️ in the end?✨ TRAUMA✨ literally there was no other reason that Nesta would've ended up where she did and how she did if sjm didn't traumatize the shit out of her and completely beat her to the ground taking her where Feyre was mentally after UTM. As if she hadn't been through enough in book 1.

Why Azriel and Rhysand and Eris are the way they are and why they do the things they do?✨TRAUMA✨ yes, i know all of them are vastly different people but they all have one thing in common and that's all of them have had a traumatizing experience and so all their decisions are excused with "he had trauma!". I'd thought that maybe Eris will be this unapologetically snarky asshole with a "devil may care" attitude kinda like what Rhys was in book 1 minus the UTM stuff but he is just another sad boy who was traumatized and is just pretend evil. It's just SO repetitive that I cannot bring myself to give a single fuck anymore. While yes it's true that trauma shapes people up but not everyone is the way they are because of trauma dude. Why does SJM think that trauma is the only way she can give any depth to her characters instead of actually making them interesting and nuanced?

Because Sarah wants you to interpret the text her way and her way only. And if you don’t agree with her opinion, then clearly it’s because you don’t respect the ~trauma~

As an example: Feylin is unshippable because Tamlin abused Feyre and worsened her trauma. Valid! But if you argue that Rhysand was also abusive and therefore Feysand is just as unshippable, all the fandom screams about is that you don’t care about Feyre's trauma (yes I HAVE been told this before). Nevermind that it’s weird the text glosses over how traumatized Feyre should be because of Rhysand (eg the bone twisting torture and the sexual assault UTM) and only allows things associated with Tamlin/the Spring Court to trigger her.

The trauma is used as a cover to force you to agree with Sarah's opinions, which as I’ve discussed before is why only selective events are allowed to traumatize her protagonists, and if you disagree with what Sarah's written then it must be because you don’t respect the trauma the characters underwent.

[circusgoth-dotcom]

(picrew: 1 | 2) (designs subject to change)

RAAAAHHHH SONIC SELF INSERT. OFFICIALLY.

meet Stellar Orion Robotnik, grandson of Gerald Robotnik, cousin of Maria and Ivo, and general relative of any other Robotniks that might be out there

while he inherited the hyper-intellect of his predecessors, he'd rather use it for something creative rather than something scientific, so for the most part he's known as an incredible and eccentric fashion designer

however, as he became aware of beings like Sonic and Shadow, his curiosity got the better of him and somewhere along the line he was briefly stuck in the form you see on the right, "Orion the Goat"

he eventually figured out how to become human again and now has the ability to shapeshift into his goat form mostly whenever he pleases

i have some Lore™️ and character dynamics ideas floating in my brain but i don't want to post too much at once 🙇‍♂️

[synonymroll648]

Listen here, if Fintan isn't dead, then Kenric isn't dead. I am in a constant state of denial

Theories

- Kenric was "protected" by the Neverseen and is now probably a pale, beaten thing on the floor

- Kenric was brainwashed by the neverseen and Oralie's true loves kiss saves him or something cute like that

- Kenric did light leap out of there, he never went back to the council because he decided that the council is Bad™️

whaddup i am over a month late to answer this :D anyway. i am not necessarily in denial about kenric being dead but i am sure as hell in denial about a lot of other things in life so. i get that. let us vibe in elf hell mostly under the cut because i know myself and my response is going to be long. warnings for mentions of immolation, torture, etc that tend to come with talking about kenric!

response to theory one:

there are a lot of fascinating potential implications with the use of quotations around protected. obviously, the implications are most likely under the umbrella of 'taken by the neverseen and isolated from the public and its knowledge'. but there's a lot of different ways you could do that! my first thought is that fitnan somehow managed to get kenric out of the fire before he burned to a complete crisp.

and then kenric was taken as a hostage. maybe they told him that if he told them council secrets, he could go free. he probably didn't give in, and that's why he's a pale, beaten thing on the floor. but who knows, maybe he did - sooner or later, your pick - and they kept him beaten and pale on the floor anyway. sounds like something they'd do. sure would hurt as a reader :')

response to theory two:

kenric being brainwashed by the neverseen is another interesting concept!! interesting and o w on the emotional scale. i'd like to think that gethen's the one that does it. so it's a character we already know and we can have connections to crescent bite marks and frostbitten ridden nails and other things associated with gethen that could contrast with kenric as we used to know him and/or who he is now. it'd also be nice to come back to kenric in person, someone who was a huge comfort - almost father-like - figure to sophie before everblaze and what went down at oblivimyre, but twisted. well, not nice, it'd hurt like hell, but that's the fun part! taking a beloved character that's become more relevant through the opening of his cache in stellarlune (and legacy? i don't think so. but i can't really remember) and seeing him again would make me go :O (/pos or /neg depending on execution, but i'm leaning toward /pos)

as for the part about oralie - first thought, incredibly cheesy but i love cheesy. plus, considering the series we're talking about, i can see it working and being in-character and lore-compliant. kenric and oralie weren't ever together, but they are like. undeniably canon. and important to canon, because the nature of their dynamic was ultimately the catalyst for a lot of aspects of the series. i mean, like, sophie probably wouldn't exist biologically in the way we know her today if it weren't for her being close enough to kenric for him to consider her as a moonlark dna donor and for her to trust him with something like that.

so having oralie, someone who was incredibly important to him before he supposedly got roasted at oblivimyre for many years, kiss him? something he wanted for so very long but never got in canon iirc? that might snap him out of mind control. not just 'cause he's like head over heels in love with her but also because he has so many memories that are important to him tied to her, whether it's like. romantic or council shit or something else. considering the lore in kotlc surrounding the idea of triggering memories and/or resurfacing a form of someone's consciousness through things that are deeply tied to their past, big or small, this seems like a solid solution. and some fluff and/or hurt/comfort that shannon would probably lean into. also the consequences of a current councillor kissing a former councillor would be fucking DELICIOUS. probably angsty. still very scrumptious

response to theory three:

oooooh i'd never considered that! i'd always thought of kenric as the kind of guy that wasn't necessarily loyal to the council first and foremost - considering how much he cared about sophie and oralie and possibly/probably the black swan or at least certain members of its organization - but cared too much about the elvin population to abandon his post as councillor willingly. though i do suppose there's always been an element of longing for a different life with his character, isn't there?

this is largely expressed through his love for oralie, but i'm sure there's more layers to it than that if you look close. i never really fixated on kenric, so i can't think of concrete evidence from the books off the top of my head that doesn't involve oralie, but you could probably pull from moments between him and sophie. she literally asks - forkle, i think? - if he's her father. and, y'know, she's wrong (unless shannon decides that was a lie), but. to stand up for a kid enough that she asks if you're her dad? definitely can be read as wanting a family at one point. which isn't a stretch, considering how oralie literally tells sophie that she gave the black swan her dna for project moonlark because she'd always wanted a kid but she couldn't as a councillor, and that was her one compromise available. and kenric is, as previously mentioned, infatuated with oralie. them secretly wanting a family together makes sense.

also, like, the entire series makes a point of him being a lot more mysterious than he looks on a surface level. some parts of the mystery of his character compelling him to leave the council behind when he gets the chance? understandable. heartbreaking, to know that he left sophie and everyone else he swore he'd protect behind instead of coming back, and unknowingly leaving them all to deal with the menace (/neg) that is alina as a councillor, but alas. it could work. i'd want reasons, though. lore as to why, lore as to where he went once he disappeared, what he's done with his new life.

random side note: it's an interesting thought to muse about whether or not kenric saw keefe while he was hiding in the forbidden cities. if he decided to get closer or further. if it was closer, it was probably in disguise. but chances are, he probably walked off as soon as he could.

if you read through to the end i'm proud of you holy shit