#madeleine delroy

[tenderhungering]

i do love how Late Night With The Devil explores the supernatural and occult, but there is something fascinating about tearing away at the layers and finding that the entire movie just revolves around loss and trauma.

whether it be the loss of fame, of lover, of a child, of drive and passion, of the drive to continue living, of a childhood, of morals, or even of respect for yourself and others; all the characters seem to have lost something as soon as they stepped fully into the industry. as soon as they decided to stand in front of the camera. there is something to be said about how much trauma is mentioned and used as something to exploit, to turn into spectacle.

you need to make something out of the tragedy that you and others have faced that can be packaged and sold or else it was all for naught. you need to benefit from your hurt or else you have suffered for nothing. your own personal hell was created for you long before you had ever made a deal with the system that acts as though money can be placed over an open wound to stop the bleeding.

money is the drive here because money means power, and if this means having to put a price in exchange for the comfort that it brings to pretend to have any power over what has happened to you then so be it. look at how much hurt i carry, can you offer me comfort? no, but we can throw in some bucks for playing the game! we can televise it. we can make your hurt real by placing a camera in front of it.

[thefawnfallacy]

Jack Delroy, if you can hear me, you will fall in love with the demon you sacrificed your wife to. Jack Delroy, if you can hear me, you will fall in love with the demon you sacrificed your wife to

[bonesaremoney]

I was talking to @nurse-strangelove about Jack’s radio days pre-Night Owls and the idea of him as sort of a counter culture darling came up, so even though canonically I know how he and Madeleine met I started doing this and could not stop

I’m waaaay out of practice with writing and it’s more little scenes than a real narrative but here, a little late 60s Jack and Minnie ft. my long haired Jack agenda

It’s 1967, and Madeleine wasn’t prepared for Chicago winters when she was cast in a two-week long production of The Tempest. New York got cold too, that’s what she’d thought when she’d packed a few extra sweaters and the peacoat her mom had gotten her for Christmas after college.

The coat got lost in the flight over. The little diner was warm, though, and the smell of coffee, cigarettes and pizza grease made her feel at home. And her date was more than “tall with dark hair and a green jacket,” as her temporary roommate had described him.

“I wasn’t sure what you liked in your coffee so I - ah, shit.” He knocked over the little carafe of milk and scrambled to soak it up with little brown diner napkins. She couldn’t help smiling as she pulled a handful out of the dispenser and tossed it on the last uncovered edges of the puddle. “Jesus, I normally don’t do that sober,” he said, one hand on his hip as he surveyed the damage. “It’s nice to meet you.”

He ran a hand through his hair absently before reaching to shake hers. His hair was longer hair than any guy’s she’d ever been out with, curling a little around his shoulders. When he smiled his dark Bambi eyes crinkled a little around the edges.

“It’s nice to meet you too, Jack,” she said, because “you’re beautiful” was a little too forward for the first five minutes. Instead she told him later that night as they crashed against his apartment’s door, her hands tangled in his hair.

-

It’s 1968 and they fly to see each other as often as they can. The gate agents at O’Hare know Jack by name.

They kissed in the cab all the way to Madeleine’s parents’ house upstate, where honest to God her mother had an apple pie cooling in the window. He felt Madeleine squeeze his hand under the table when her father asked skeptically what he did for a living. “I’m in broadcasting, sir.”

-

“Don’t worry about him,” Madeleine said as they walked hand in hand down the midway at her hometown’s county fair. “He’s still in mourning for my lost secretarial career. Though it’s probably a good thing he and Mom never saw the nude production of Spring Awakening I did before we met.” She took a bite of cotton candy, watched the tilt-a-whirl’s purple and green lights shimmer in Jack’s eyes and the faint blush color his cheeks.

“He wanted me to marry an attorney, that’s all. He’ll warm up to you.”

“I’m not holding my breath on that,” Jack laughed. “But he doesn’t need to worry. I’m gonna give you the world.”

Madeleine laughed, half-expecting him to break into Jimmy Stewart’s monologue about giving his girl the moon.

“The world, hm? Start with that Minnie Mouse doll by the ring toss and we’ll talk about the world.”

[sourszt]

𝟏:𝟏𝟗 𝐚𝐦 | 𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 — jack delroy x fem!reader

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 — nsfw, p in v sex, reader helps jack ‘relax’, slight coercion/convincing, unprotected sex, on a counter/table ? LMAO, rough sex lowk, cant think of any other tags, except its not proofread!

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 — this takes place right before the halloween special lol, def might be ooc jack but idgaf!! this took me two days to write i lowkey forgot how to write smut ?? discovered i was a lesbian and forgot how het sex worked my bad yall! anyways enjoy cuz i have yet to see a fic about this man.

the studio was buzzing with excitement when you arrived. crew members blew by you from every direction, barking orders and carrying pieces of halloween decorations that would be strewn around the night owls’ set within the next hour. tonight was the halloween special that was expected to bring jack’s show to the top, and he’d said he wanted you there to see it.

you’d only been there a couple of times — jack advising against you visiting him too often in case people started suspecting things about your relationship.

it was his first since madeleine had passed a year ago, and he wasn’t quite ready to go public yet. especially if it meant it would hurt any chances of the show not beating johnny carson’s tonight show.

afterwards would be your time, he promised you.

you hugged your coat closer to your body as you tried to navigate the set yourself, skimming over the panels beside every door until a familiar face came into view. you sighed, instinctively grinning when you spotted leo fiske, the show’s producer.

his stress-lined face shifted the moment he saw you, greeting you with a kiss on the cheek and a brief hug. “how are ya, sweetheart?”

behind his sunglasses, he looked you up and down and hummed softly. you flashed him a tight grin and pulled your coat shut. he was charming, sure, but sometimes he was more direct than you liked. something told you that he knew about you and jack, and probably threatened the latter with it, but if he did he hid it well.

“i’m alright,” you kept the atmosphere light with a laugh, “where’s jack?”

the mention of his name made the man roll his eyes and scoff. “jackass has been locked up in his dressing room for the past half hour.” you pouted, realizing how much pressure he must be feeling. “end of the hallway to the right. i’ll slide you a fifty if you can untwist his panties, alright?” leo joked, gently patting your shoulder before brushing past you. you watched him go for a second, watching him beckon a female crew member over for something.

you hurried down the hallway to the door leo had directed you to, relieved when you saw jack’s name next to the door. knocking gently, you waited for him to call you in. “jack?” you called out when he didn’t reply.

boldly, you cracked open the door and stuck your head inside, finding jack sitting at his makeup vanity while an artist stood poised at his side, patting powder onto his forehead.

she startled when she heard your entrance, and flashed you a curt smile before returning to jack. he noticed you only when the woman had paused for too long and gestured you inside.

“give us a moment, will you?” he murmured to the makeup artist, who nodded and left the room.

you waited until the door was shut and her footsteps had gone quiet before sliding your arms around jack’s shoulders from behind. “how’re things going?” you asked with a coy grin, pecking him on the cheek.

he groaned when he saw a faint mark from your lipstick and realized he’d have to get another touch up later. “as great as they could be.” he replied rather bitterly, making your smile falter slightly. you gave him a curious look in the mirror, and that was his breaking point. his head lulled into his palm, paying no mind to how his fingers ruffled his gelled hair. “i swear to god, fiske thinks i can’t fuckin’ do it. he doesn’t think i can pull it off tonight.”

you hovered beside him for a second, unsure of how to console him. “what do you mean? tonight’s been all the talk for a week now, it’s gonna do great, baby.” you tried to reassure him, gently shaking him by his shoulders in his seat.

this seemed to ease his nerves just a little and he sighed, sliding a hand up to grab your hand. he found your eyes in the mirror and smiled for the first time that night, then looked down at your outfit.

you’d picked his favorite red dress, pairing it with the little devil-horn headband tucked away in your purse. it was shorter than you liked it to be, often having to tug the glittery fabric back down the curve of your hips, but jack loved when you wore it. tonight was a special occasion, so you figured he’d appreciate it.

“i just don’t know what i’m gonna do. what if he’s right?” jack continued to ramble. “you know, he keeps tellin’ me christou’s gig isn’t gonna gain enough traction to get us up. gus was tellin’ me that he’s called an act in last minute and he hasn’t run it by me yet — i swear to god, if it’s that jackass carmichael—” he huffed and stopped when he realized he was getting too worked up.

he hadn’t realized you had peeled yourself off of him and was tossing your coat onto the couch beside him. “hand me a smoke, won’t ya sweetheart?” he pointed loosely to your purse, knowing you were carrying some.

you two smoked the same brand, so he often stole yours. you didn’t mind.

you handed him a cigarette and he leaned in for a light. he sunk back into his chair as he blew out a puff of smoke, the tension steadily chipping away.

“baby, you need to relax, alright?” you cooed softly, stealing a quick drag of his cigarette. “you’re gonna do great. you always do.” your lithe fingers gently rubbed at his shoulders, smiling as his eyes fluttered shut and he melted under your hands.

“c’mere.” he grabbed your wrist and tugged you around his chair, steadying you with his hands on your hips before him. his eyes raked down your body and he sucked in a sharp breath. “relax, huh?” jack’s voice was low now, deeper. it made your breath hitch in your throat.

“jack, i…” your eyes flickered over to the unlocked door and you took a step back. your ass bumped into the edge of his vanity. a startled cry escaped you. “you’re on soon.” you whispered with an uneasy grin. although, he wasn’t live for another hour or so.

as much as your stomach fluttered at the look in his eyes, you feared the embarrassment if someone were to walk in on you two. especially if you weren’t public yet.

“c’mon, sweetheart,” jack groaned, chasing you out of his seat. his hands caged you in against the vanity, one reaching out to smash his cigarette out into the ashtray beside you, and his body pushed against yours. he practically forced you on top of the counter, a few bottles and trinkets toppling over in your little scramble. jack took the chance to nudge his knee in between your legs, humming with satisfaction at the small whine you tried and failed to keep inside.

you ducked your head shyly, but he moved with you, coaxing you into looking up. when he had you, he could tell there was no going back. your lips parted as you glanced down at his.

“that’s it.” he whispered with a gentle smirk before he kissed you. you sighed into it, feeling his urgency as his tongue slipped past your teeth. your fingers wrapped tightly around his biceps, your legs threatening to give out underneath you.

they instinctively parted when you felt the tip of jack’s finger trail up the top of your thigh. your skin dimpled with goosebumps and you shivered. he had such a feathery touch until he reached the hem of your dress, stealing a quick glance at how it bunched up at the fat of your hips and revealed your red panties.

then his hand dipped in between your thighs, his fingers prodding at your clothed cunt. you whined, a little too loudly, and jack flashed you a warning look.

“can you be quiet for me, sweetheart?” he whispered. you hardly had the mind to nod, let alone comprehend what he was saying. your mind was fucking spinning trying to get a grip, and it didn’t help that jack’s middle finger was lazily circling your clit over your panties. “what’s that?” he taunted, chin lowering with expectancy.

“mhm, yes, yes i can,” you eagerly nodded, words stringing together in a barely coherent murmur.

“good girl.” jack groaned. he slipped his hand into the waistband of your panties, a smirk dancing on his lips when he felt how wet you were. “you wanted this, huh?”

you hadn’t entirely realized that he was talking to you, too busy working your hips against his heavy fingers. your body felt like it was on fire. you desperately pleaded for him to hurry up, for both of your sakes.

he looked down at your clumsy fingers as they tried to unbuckle his belt, but it was like it was welded around his waist. frenzied whimpers filled the room until jack finally helped you, almost taking pity on your incoherency. while he worked at the zipper on his trousers, you quickly slid your panties down your hips and around at least one foot. the thin lace dangled from the toe of your heel when jack captured you in another fervent kiss.

you feel the tip of his cock catch just below your clit and your breath caught in your throat. one of his hands slid to the small of your back, pulling you to the very edge of the counter. your legs widened for him, waiting.

he granted you relief, easing himself into your tight cunt. he groaned into your neck, stilling so he didn’t cum on the spot. “god, you’re so fuckin’ tight.” his voice shook.

he went until his hips were flush with yours, watching how your face contorted with pure ecstasy. your lips parted in a high cry and your eyes squeezed shut, and your head lulled back. jack stole the opportunity to latch onto your neck, adorning your skin with kisses and licks. you pulled him closer with your arms around his neck.

“shit, jack,” your fingers raked through his hair, neither of you caring about how pissed hair and makeup were going to be with him. long, dark strands fell over his forehead and tickled your skin. “jack.”

he loved how his name sounded in your mouth. how he always managed to get you like this, though for some reason it was quicker than usual that your face flushed and your eyelids drooped with arousal. it stirs something deep in his stomach and he slams into you, setting an unrelenting pace. he didn’t care that it rocked the vanity mirror back into the wall with a hollow thud.

your thighs hug his waist and your ankles meet behind him, silently pleading for more. “greedy little girl, aren’t you?” he whispers with half a grin. he draws a strained cry from you with each deep thrust, your cunt clenching in fluttering pulses around him.

“fuck,” he hissed, knowing he wasn’t going to last much longer. he knows you wouldn’t either. your cries were growing louder and louder and more frequent. the mirror kept tapping against the wall and things kept rolling off of the counter and onto the floor. tears gathered in your eyes, painting your eyelashes each time your eyes squeezed shut. though each time you did, jack would remind you to look at him. he gently shushed you at first, then used his mouth when you weren’t listening.

your back arched into his chest as you came with a cry of his name, jack murmuring into your ear, “good girl, that’s it.” your body seemed to melt in his arms, going near slack as you came down from the high he was fucking you through.

it was only a few more thrusts until he came, barely managing to pull out before painting the insides of your thighs. he knew you would be pissed that it got on your dress once you realized, but he didn’t care.

after a minute of blissful silence, jack checked his watch. “shit, fiske’s probably lookin’ for me.” he rolled his eyes as he buckled his belt, praying to god that his beige pants were relatively stain-free.

if push came to shove, he’d tell him that he spilled his drink in his lap. he gave you room to get to your feet, watching with quiet pride as your knees wobbled pretty noticeably.

you tugged your dress down your hips, absently searching for a tissue box. a smile crossed your lips when you looked up and you lifted yourself onto your tip-toes to press a kiss to his lips.

“knock ‘em dead, baby.”

lowkey surrounded this smut based on the “secret relationship” trope and the last line. lowkey ass and rushed but enjoy!

[accidentally-in-fictional-love]

Chocolate Whiskey and a Borrowed Bed - Leo Fiske/Jack Delroy

Warnings: Era-influenced homophobia, publicly closeted Leo, entirely closeted Jack, mutual pining, Leo really gets around, blowjobs, handjobs, anal sex, hopes for the future ;w;

Wordcount: 10074

Summary: It's been one year exactly since Night Owls was brought back from the dead, so Leo throws the crew and their friends a big party at his unlisted address so they can all celebrate properly away from prying eyes after the near disaster last year almost was, and maybe, a little party is all Jack needs to finally get some things off his chest.

Notes: I wrote this for my wonderful talented amazing friend @glamgoths for her birthday, love youuuu 🥰💗💗💗 she's a Jack/Leo truther to the point where it made me a Jack/Leo truther, Leo became so cool in my eyes that I not only have fun writing him in readers but it also overwrote my selfship jealousy in order to ship him with Jack, so I surprised her with this hehe

Halloween, 1978.

No one could explain what had happened last year no matter how they looked at it, their carefully planned show to get great ratings just in time for the start of Sweeps Week nearly ruined by a series of bad luck. Even he couldn’t figure it out, not with undeniable certainty, but it’d led to Christou getting some kind of food poisoning after his unknowingly staged communication with someone in their audience, then some carefully planned messages from some poor woman's son, and finally ending with him throwing up all over Haig after having to deal with his usual bullshit. 

It was funny if not shocking, but it had done the ratings good, something from his pre-show meal turning the contents in his stomach black, squid ink he'd said, which sounded disgusting when Leo had heard it, but damn if it hadn't worked in their favour.

Haig had kept his check in the end, and he'd flashed it in June's face when he'd been able to recreate the same kind of hypnosis as her, hell, it’d even gotten him a little backstage, but he’d never admit it. She'd stormed out when Jack tried to replay the footage of Lilly’s possession to then prove that she hadn’t faked anything, that'd been the last straw even with Lilly wanting to show Haig once and for all that he was wrong, and the show had ended with Cleo singing to a disappointed audience. But the ratings, the fight for that last scene that never came, they'd impressed Cavendish’s new vice president of marketing just like they’d wanted, and it'd brought the show back to life.

It was a year later, Halloween again, and this time Jack was determined to have Haig eat his words. He'd searched high and low for even better guests, found another illusionist like Haig had been but better, and the moment she’d walked out on stage it was clear that there was an air to her that Christou hadn’t held. She'd claimed to levitate as well as commune with the dead and read futures, and he'd almost paid - his presence was practically required after last year, to Jack's chagrin - but decidedly hadn't when she refused to tell him how it was done. The audience had been split, one half telling him to pay her while the other wanted to know how she did it when he did the same and he was perfectly fine with explaining it, and she'd ended up being consoled by Jack when she became overwhelmed on camera.

Leo didn't like that part of the show, just another June to replace Madeleine, and he'd downed a bit too much whiskey as the show continued on after the break. She didn't stay no matter how much Jack pleaded for her to, her bit was done in her eyes and Haig wouldn't let up even when the cameras were off, so Leo had to be the one to help her gather her stuff and make sure she reached her ride. He did it as calmly as possible even though the memory of Jack's arms around her made him light up a smoke while they waited by the busy street, despite her request that no one smoke around her; it was petty, but she'd live, a little smoke wouldn't kill her when it was very clear she'd only come on the show because she wanted to be near Jack, not because she believed in his mindset about the occult despite her career choice.

The show was wrapping up now, it felt like it'd lasted several hours this time instead of just one, and Leo had Jack's favourite ready for him with a spin, picked especially for tonight; it was a glass of Ballotin's new brand of chocolate whiskey, to keep in the spirit of Halloween and candy while also being perfect for a man surely stressed beyond belief because he needed to top last year, and as soon as the cameras cut and he handed over the glass, Jack downed it all before he even had a chance to open his mouth to congratulate him on how it’d went. It took him a moment to register the chocolate amidst the usual burn of the whiskey, his eyes going wide in surprise as Leo just smirked.

‘Thought you could use a taste of the party before we get there,’ he told him before blowing a light lungful of smoke towards the ceiling, Jack swirling the last drops around before taking a sniff.

‘So is this considered a trick, or a treat?’ he asked him, already starting to calm again now that it was over, and Leo liked the sight of that as he led him backstage to gather his own things as the crew cleaned up for the night. 

‘Depends on how much of a surprise it was,’ he figured as they reached the snack table, or what was left of it, it'd been picked clean between the crew and Jack sneaking the chocolatey treats to the Madame all night before her departure. Jack thought about it before considering it a treat apparently as he poured himself another glass, drank it back, and then left it to be cleaned up later. ‘You doing alright after Haig drove away your girlfriend again this year?’

‘You know I'm not seeing anyone, and I'm more concerned with how it all turned out, how were the phones this year?’

‘Ringing off the hook once she started floating and no one could find the strings, not even Haig,’ Leo told him, the two making their way out of their set room and into the hallway leading to the elevators. ‘Rang so much we had to borrow some phones, lots of questions about how we did it and if she'll be back with more, since she isn't performing live for a while.’

Jack did a little leap for joy as the elevator doors opened, his eyes wild with excitement over the news, he always got so youthful despite nearing his 50s the moment he learned that a show had done well; he was getting better with accepting he would never beat Carson, he'd been against the therapy at first, but seeing how much his fans and co-workers still cared for him had encouraged him to despite the stigma, and while he was still getting over Madeleine, at least he was okay with putting on a good show without also putting his entire self-worth on the line.

That was good, Leo liked to see him happy and wanting to be ready to knock ‘em dead again, he could worry about the numbers and the sponsors enough for the both of them from now on.

‘How late you gunna stay out tonight?’ he asked when they reached the ground floor, Jack thinking about it and pulling on his thick coat over top of his suit while they headed for the door leading to the staff parking lot.

‘Not long, trying to get better sleep, Bianca says that it'll help me focus better if I cut down on the late nights, try sleeping when the sun is down instead of working til it rises,’ he told him as they reached their cars, Leo holding his cigarette between cold fingers as he rested on the roof of his car.

‘Another woman in your life?’ he teased, but there was a bitterness in there, his eyes hidden by the dark as well as his sunglasses as Jack leaned against his own car.

‘Far from it, she's my therapist and she's married, for one,’ he chuckled almost nervously, Leo raising an eyebrow.

‘Hey, I won't tell her husband if you don't,’ he joked just to see if Jack liked her, the other man running what was definitely a nervous hand through his hair at that one.

‘For two, she isn't married to a man,’ he continued in a quieter voice than before, silence falling between them as Leo caught on instantly; they didn't talk about this sort of thing even though more of them were appearing in public. He was one of them, not that he'd ever tell, but she must trust Jack in order to tell him that, and the thought of why she'd trust him made him nearly crush his cigarette before he snuffed it out on the back of his hand really quick before tossing it away.

‘Ah, well, that'll put a stop to things,’ he agreed, Jack laughing again a little more easily now that he knew Leo wouldn't judge this random woman he knew. There was a flash of something in his eye, even from afar and in the dim lights he could see it from there, and he gave the car a tap to get Jack's attention when he started to unlock his door. ‘Hey, why don't I give you a ride to my place, save a bit on gas?’

‘You gunna drive me home later? I already told you I can't stay long this time,’ he reminded him, but he was already walking over, and Leo waved away his concern for his sleep schedule.

‘You know I've got plenty of room, just steal a bed when you've had enough, at least stay up to bob for some apples and watch a movie with us, I spent a lotta time setting all this shit up,’ Leo insisted, and Jack laughed even easier as he reached for the handle.

‘You mean you got your assistant to set it up?’

‘Fuck no, she only knows about the penthouse, not the house.’ They piled into his car and he turned on the heat as soon as the engine turned over for Jack's sake, and he had to admit it was a nice sight to have him sitting there in the passenger seat as he fiddled with its position and got warmed up. He didn't smoke anymore, he'd quit for good after last year, and Leo made sure not to light up on the way to the house; naturally there was a group of them gathered around his front door when they arrived, he'd banned it inside to avoid Jack giving in to any cravings and forcing him to restart again, and made a mental note to tell them to go out back next time. He shooed them aside as they approached even though Jack didn't need him to, everyone was already inside since those who knew about the place knew where the spare key was hidden, and they'd started everything while the show was finishing up.

He found out who'd gotten there first and went to thank them as Jack went through the motions of another successful show to those who didn't see him as often, the two separating as the party took them elsewhere for a while; he'd made sure to leave a note for the ones who arrived early, since it'd be a choice on their end seeing as they all knew that filming didn't finish til 1AM, and the living room and kitchen were filled with adult versions of the classic activities the kids around the city were surely also doing. There was a cheap tub filled with water and apples as promised, but there were also a bunch of hidden items in boxes the guests could touch and then guess at what was inside. There was a pin the skull on the skeleton taped to the wall as well as the tail on the werewolf for those who were feeling a little more childish on this fun night, and of course, the kitchen was filled with snacks and candy galore. 

He'd secretly spent a fortune on tonight because he knew this was Jack's favourite holiday, and because he needed to keep riding the high of good company and even better alcohol - he was still working on that - so he needed to make this as tempting as possible. On the outside he looked uninterested with it all, he was the adult here amidst this group of children, but on the inside he was glad everyone was enjoying themselves, small smiles escaping him when someone got too excited about placing the tail or skull correctly, by grabbing an apple on the first try. It took a while but Jack joined them after he met with what was probably every single person in the house - and even the ones outside - to continue marketing himself to them, making more connections, now that he was back, as he put it.

Leo let him mingle until he was done, and he had more Ballotin ready for him when he found him in the kitchen while he was going over the supplies for the remainder of the party. ‘No thanks, I've been trying to cut back, believe it or not.’

‘Jack Delroy, I can believe you when you say you've given up smoking, but drinking? What's gunna keep you running these late nights?’ Leo joked as he accepted the glass from himself instead, but this time Jack didn't laugh, in fact, the mood seemed to have dropped a bit. ‘You're serious?’

‘Yeah, Bianca helped me see I was relying too much on it after- after Minnie, so I've been cutting back, what you gave me earlier was the first drink I've had all week,’ he confessed in the emptiness of the kitchen while everyone else partied in the other rooms, and Leo felt a somberness he hadn't felt since he'd heard about Madeleine's diagnosis fall over him. Jack talked a lot about things, he had big dreams and never stopped at them no matter what tried to keep him down, it was the thing that drew Leo to him in the first place when he was looking for a producer to help get him into TV, and it was what made him fall in love, along with a long list of other things.

Yeah, he'd admit it sometimes, he'd fallen in love with Jack instead of just telling himself it was a crush that grown men shouldn't have on other men, but Jack was easy to love, always had been, even when Minnie had gotten there first and stolen his heart so completely that she never left, even after death.

He set the glass down on the counter and walked over to Jack where he was still picking through the assorted snacks for the specific ones he wanted, a small pile of chocolate-covered pretzels in his hand as Leo rounded the island and clapped a hand on his friend's shoulder. Jack stiffened, he'd probably meant to keep this one a secret since the smoking was shared by so many in the studio, and Leo squeezed to let him know that he'd respect that journey the same way he had the moment Jack had swore he'd quit for good when he'd been offered a smoke come November 1st last year.

Jack smiled and held Leo's hand over his shoulder, this was getting dangerous, but there was no one there to judge as Leo refused to pull away, just like he always did when Jack needed him to stand by his side. ‘You're a good friend, Leo, you've been there for me since the start, if you hadn't been with me when I lost her, I… I don't know what I would've done,’ Jack told him quietly, his energetic voice so soft the way it always was when he talked about Madeleine and almost quitting the business, and he knew he shouldn't, but he couldn't help but pull Jack into a tight hug. 

‘You're a good man, Jack, always been better than the rest of us, how could I let you crash and burn out there when there's still so much fire in you?’ he asked into his arm, because he couldn't face him, and he heard Jack let out a breath as he nuzzled into his neck in appreciation. He didn't get the shivers, his heart didn't skip a beat, his face didn't redden, but Leo felt like he could maybe admit he was in love twice in one night as Jack took all he could from the hug and finally pulled away. He looked a bit better, he must've been having a hard time restraining from everything when this time of the year was so hard to top, and instead of the whiskey, Leo grabbed two glasses and filled them with ice water instead.

This one Jack did accept, and they toasted over chocolate pretzels and candy corn while someone pinned something perfectly according to the yells from the next room. Jack drank it with a hiss through his teeth at the freeze instead of the burn, and he placed the glass on the counter and took his pretzels with a small shrug towards the stairs in the distance. ‘Gunna turn in for the night, you still got my room made up?’ he asked as he walked backwards towards it, and Leo tipped his glass towards him, of course he did, he always would. Jack nodded and helped himself to one of his pretzels before disappearing into the crowd, Leo watching him go before heading back out there himself, a smile plastered to his face as he greeted the night owls and other business casual friends, the late hours ticking away until they needed to either leave or crash on his couches. 

He made sure to clean up before retiring for the night as well, he'd hate himself come morning if he didn't no matter how much he wanted to put it on the ones currently taking up his couches, armchair, and even floor as well as the remaining rooms upstairs, and it was well into the AMs by the time everything in the kitchen at least was tidied so as to not disturb those already resting. He was dead tired as he scaled the stairs so he could finally get to his room, a symphony of snores coming from the spares lining the halls as they always did when he threw parties like this; it was the reason he bought the place, he'd always known people, even when he was young, thanks to his parents and who they in turn knew, so continuing that tradition and getting a place where he could gather everyone together and create this kind of environment for them in this unlisted home had always been second nature to him, always been who he knew he would be when he grew older.

He reached his room and turned the handle, everyone knowing to stay away because he did not lend this one to anyone if he was going to stay the night no matter who they were, and he was in the middle of taking off his sunglasses and rubbing his eyes when he noticed that the bed wasn't empty.

His eyes adjusted to the dark as he stared at the form under his blankets, someone had come in and snagged it while he was downstairs, and an annoyance like no other overtook him as he stormed over to kick them out, this room was off limits. He stopped when he saw it was Jack, his suit jacket ditched and the buttons on his shirt undone as he snored soundly away under the covers. The hair peeking over his undershirt made Leo stare even though he'd seen it before during emergency costume changes, or when Jack and Madeleine used to take over his pool. Now it felt like this was against some rule that'd never been spoken, this was intimate, a side of him he shouldn't be seeing, and he sighed before rubbing his eyes again and giving his friend a small shake.

‘C’mon, I wanna get some rest, go find your room,’ he told him softly, like he didn't want to wake him despite what he was both saying and doing, but when Jack understandably continued to sleep he steeled himself and pushed a little harder. ‘Jack, let's go, let me sleep.’

‘This is where I wanna be,’ Jack mumbled as he got even comfier, and Leo retracted his hand instantly as if he'd been burned.

‘This is my room, thought you asked about your usual?’ His voice just kept lowering even though he was actively fighting to speak loudly so as to keep Jack from falling back asleep, the latter glancing up at him through one barely opened eye before reaching for his hand and pulling it back to not his arm, but to his chest.

‘Let me stay…’ he whispered before his face softened again, he was just conscious enough to ask as he now actively tried not to fight off sleep so he wouldn’t have to leave, and Leo considered it before he frowned; he knew this couldn't be what he wanted, it was dangerous to be what he was and he couldn't have Jack following after him after working so hard to gain Cavendish's favour and sponsor and bringing Night Owls back from the dead.

‘Jack, stop this, get outta my bed,’ he demanded, his usual firmness back in place to protect himself, and this woke Jack up as he sat up with surprisingly clarity and stared him down.

‘I'm where I want to be,’ he repeated, and Leo's eyes trailed over his chest before he grabbed onto him, tried to pull him up.

‘You're too old to be playing games like this, you're a grown man for Christ's sake,’ he insisted as he tugged, Jack fighting him until he lost his balance; he fell forward, a knee shooting out to stop himself from crashing into the other man, and there was a moment where they stared at each other in the dark. He swallowed, this was too intimate, this was dangerous, if anyone heard and came to see what was wrong the both of them might lose everything even though nothing was even happening, he couldn’t do this to him, he’d nearly lost it all before.

He tried to shove him away, just let him have the bed, he’d find another room or join someone on the goddamn floor if he had to, but Jack was holding him so firmly, just like he did when he’d come to him about Madeleine’s sickness, and her passing. He was refusing to let go, and there was a sadness in his eyes underneath the desperation and fight to stay, there was something he was hiding from him just like he had about going sober. He tried to pull away again but Jack tightened his grip and used all his strength to attempt to bring Leo to his chest, and when that didn’t work he threw himself into his arms.

‘Jack, you don’t know what you’re doing,’ he warned, but his voice wasn't as harsh as before, and he felt Jack shake his head against his shoulder before turning to press his face into his neck. ‘Jack-’ He grabbed on but he couldn’t yank him off, he hadn’t drank much and that had been hours ago but he must be drunk, he knew the dangers too, there was no way this could happen no matter how the world was progressing, not for them.

‘Please, I’ll get you something to drink, you don’t even have to do anything with me, just let me pretend that it’s normal to feel this way, just for one night,’ Jack whispered into his skin, his unkempt hair disturbing Leo’s curls, and he froze and stopped trying to pull him away when he felt Jack tremble.

‘How long?’ he could only ask, and Jack didn’t pull away.

‘Since the Grove, being around the other men reminded me of what I’d forgotten.’

‘Fuck, no- how long have you wanted this from me?’ He paused when Jack didn’t answer. ‘Or am I just- the one you thought you could ask?’

It took him a while but he did answer, and Leo saw himself standing in the UBC lobby while Jack tried to make it past the receptionist all those years ago. All his big dreams to get into television instead of radio had made him turn on the charm with her, but when she couldn’t do anything because his low priority appointment had been canceled in favour of a high priority call and lunch date, he’d become desperate. Leo had watched as Jack had looked almost ready to give in and try again later, that fire in his eyes still there along with his frustration because he’d come so far, he had the experience and charisma, he just needed a chance.

Leo had been the one to give it to him, not because he’d fallen in love, because it’d taken a while for that to happen, but because he wanted to see what he could do.

‘Even before Minnie, I’ve… always wanted it from you,’ Jack confessed in the quiet of Leo’s bedroom like they were a couple of confused and experimenting teenagers again, just two kids who felt things that the world would never understand, come 30 years too late. Leo was definitely confused, he’d seen the way Jack loved Madeleine, that had been real, there were no lies or performances for the cameras between them, but for him to say this, to look like he truly meant it, maybe he knew less about the world than he thought. ‘Sorry, forget it, it’s the whiskey talking, I’m not actually a-’

‘You’re sober, you’ve been sober,’ Leo reminded him harshly, not wanting him to back out when it was reminding him too much of every single man he’d ever been with who told him the same the moment it was over, along with many utterings of it throughout whenever they asked him to fuck them. It hurt too much to see it come from Jack, the one man he actually wanted to be with, not just sleep with, and he let himself slip for just a moment as he pried his hands off of his arms so he could hold them instead. ‘You say it came back to you at the Grove? Have you been with anyone since you moved up here?’

‘No one, just Minnie,’ he replied like saying it was easing that weight, and Leo let his head fall forward until he was almost leaning on Jack’s shoulder; this was hard, if he let Jack know that he felt the same it would change everything, he could have what he wanted and be there for him in more ways than just as his producer. He could know how it felt to go home with him like tonight all the time, he could hold him in his bed without having to push him away or worry about those on the other side of his door, he could be the one Jack whispered and smiled at the same way he watched him do to Madeleine for years.

If he told him, he might just be the one Jack loved.

‘I just saw someone, the other week I think it was, right after the show,’ Leo told him, he hadn’t told anyone before, there was no one to tell. ‘We’ve been on and off for a few years, nothing actually serious, just casual fucking whenever we need it, cause I- shit, I never forgot, Jack.’

Jack swallowed as he looked at him in a new light, and it was like a weight had lifted off his own shoulders, but now a new weight was replacing it, because if Jack was like the others, if he did this with him now and then pretended like it’d never happened the next day, Leo would drink himself into a fucking oblivion.

‘So you’ve actually…?’ He couldn’t even say it, so Leo matched him by only nodding. ‘Yeah, me too, that thing they say about the rituals and the- the orgies, christ- it’s all- it’s all true, and once I was in, and they invited me to them, I couldn’t forget again.’ He looked almost ashamed, he might actually be like those other men, and Leo let go of his hands to grab him by the shoulders, he wouldn’t lose him to that shame over who he was now that he was saying it.

‘Jack, hey, listen to me,’ he urged as Jack actually looked away even though he’d been so ready for this, he’d planned on it by coming in here and getting into his bed, begging him to stay, he couldn’t back down now. ‘There’s nothing wrong with you, you hear me? Even if you had to find out again because of that, there’s nothing wrong with either of us, but it’s up to you whether you want to go forward with who you are, or to hide it again.’ Jack refused to look at him as he spoke, but he could see the gears turning, he was thinking, deciding on what his future would be now that they both knew about each other, and Leo was ready to give him all the time Jack needed to think when he suddenly leaned forward and kissed him.

His eyes went wide while Jack’s scrunched shut, this was so different from the way he held Madeleine, and he decided to give him time with this until Jack slowly pulled away; the gears were still turning, and Leo watched as he licked his lips, looked at his producer’s, and leaned in again. This time it was softer, more testing than just going for it, and he pretended like this hadn’t been what he’d been wanting for years as he eased his grip on Jack’s shoulders and let him figure it all out, he wouldn’t rush him.

It felt like he’d forgotten how to kiss, it’d been over a year since Madeleine had died already but he’d figured that he’d been at least hooking up once the guilt of having feelings for others had lessened, but with the way he was kissing him so carefully, like he was afraid to want more let alone touch him, he had to wonder if Jack had just been alone this whole time. It made him want to be patient even more despite his brain telling him to kiss him back already, and it wasn't until Jack rested his hand against Leo’s jaw and tried to deepen it that he allowed himself to. It came easier for Jack after that, like he was remembering it all, like he was getting comfortable in what he wanted, and Leo finally felt what Madeleine did when Jack let out a small sigh against his mouth and started to shift forward.

This was bad, this was exactly what he wanted and Leo didn’t know if he could stop as Jack got more into it, his unbuttoned shirt slipping off his shoulders before he was moving onto Leo’s. Jack was too big to slot himself onto Leo’s lap like the smaller men who wanted him to hold them down and treat them like girls, even like the men who’d never bottomed in their lives but wanted him to show them how, but damn if he wouldn’t try as he gave in and kissed him back with everything he had. He took off his own shirt thanks to Jack’s helpful hands, his own then sliding over Jack’s warm thighs to cup his ass.

He felt different than the others because he was Jack, this was a body he’d been beside every single day since he’d brought him upstairs to get his canceled appointment followed through, one so familiar to him in every way but still feeling so different under his palms and fingers. He knew each curve hidden under those pressed slacks, knew the exact angle his back naturally curved to when he hunched forward, knew how sharp his jawline was as he talked, but it was fresh and new to him as he reacquainted himself with each one. His thighs were full yet they held a slimness that allowed him to partially crawl onto his lap without any trouble. His ass was firm but also gave way in just the way he liked when he kneaded at it. His spine could just slightly be felt when his hand slipped under his undershirt for more, and his jaw worked in an almost devilish way as his clever tongue danced over Leo’s own.

It was all new, but in a way he’d always known all of this, and he groaned when Jack broke the kiss to mouth at his neck.

He shoved him back down onto the pillows, he didn’t know what Jack had done at the Grove and he wouldn’t ask, but for now he would show him how it felt to be loved by a man, not just fucked. It seemed to be exactly what Jack wanted, if he wasn't lying then he’d wanted this for maybe just as long as Leo had, and he returned the favour by leaving a trail of marks where they wouldn’t be seen by the cameras. Jack let out a noise that went straight to Leo’s dick as his hands tangled in his hair, wrapped in his curls and tugged in a way that drove him crazy, was he like this with the others, with Madeleine? 

He didn’t want to think about them now, not even her because he was with her husband, just like how he could never look her in the eye after every single night he got off imagining that the man underneath him was hers.

He lifted Jack’s undershirt over his head and moved down even further, it was clear that he either did really want this or he really hadn’t been with anyone since she got sick because Jack was so hard it looked like he could barely stand it. It made his mouth water at the sight, and he licked his lips before mouthing at his pants, his hands working on his belt. He didn’t give head that often, he preferred to receive it, because that way he could help himself to a cold glass full of dark liquid and guide their heads while he shut his eyes and pretended, but tonight he wanted to if it was going to be for him.

‘Leo…’ Jack moaned as he watched, and he wished he hadn’t taken off his sunglasses so soon because now Jack would know exactly where his eyes were while he did this. He tugged his pants down his hips a little, he was getting too old for this kind of foreplay this late at night with no sleep, but he was sure as hell going to try for as long as his back allowed if it meant getting to look up and see Jack looking back at him with that expression. He looked ready to burst, maybe it was the former and not the latter, and he hoped that it was true as he mouthed him through his briefs and started to palm him.

He waited until Jack was practically begging for it before pulling him out, and he mentally recited what had to be the first prayer he’d said since he was a child in Sunday school as he ran his palm dryly over the shaft just to feel his heat. He felt Jack pulse against his palm, a twitch following as Jack lifted his hips to try and fuck his loose fist, and Leo spit into his palm before stroking Jack more eagerly. His head fell back against the pillows, his legs already tensing as he was forced to look away, and Leo licked his lips again before taking the tip into his mouth and swirling his tongue over the leaking head.

Jack was already panting, a new but familiar desperation was overwhelming him more than he could handle after a year of abstinence, and Leo had to take his mouth away to hush him before continuing; if anyone woke up from their drunken stupors long enough to hear Jack’s voice coming from his room then it was all over, and he eased up just enough for Jack to catch his breath. He waited until he was quieter before taking the rest of him into his mouth as much as he could manage, and he savoured the taste of him and his lust like he would die the moment he forgot it.

Jack covered his mouth before grabbing Leo’s discarded shirt and biting down on it to muffle the noises when he couldn’t keep his hand in place, and Leo glanced up to see his friend bucking his hips and screwing his eyes shut tight as his teeth showed over the fabric. He moaned around him, Jack shaking his head at the feeling because that was too much, he couldn’t handle that, and Leo cocked an eyebrow at him before doing it again. Jack let go of the shirt and needed to cover his mouth again while his other hand found Leo’s hair, tried to get him to stop because it was going to make him come, and he just gripped his hips and bobbed his head a little faster in response.

He was lightly thrusting against his mattress so his moans came easier, he was never this vocal but it was driving Jack wild, and he was ready to be whatever he wanted him to be as the hand in his hair gave him a warning tug. He took him deeper, it was making him choke, he was definitely getting too old for this, but between Jack pulling his hair with both hands to get him off before the pleasure took him over and the growing sounds of his need he knew he’d risk that sore throat to finish this. He had to shut his own eyes when the sight of Jack fucking up into his mouth so he could come nearly pushed him over the edge, and he swallowed down every last drop as he felt his come shoot down his throat between punishing thrusts of the soft head hitting him where no man had been allowed before tonight.

He didn’t pull off until Jack was done, he’d needed that so badly that he’d gone limp the moment he was done, and Leo caught his breath and cleared his throat as he pushed himself back onto his knees; he never swallowed, he didn’t like the taste, but with Jack, like everything else, it was different, and he crawled up until he was practically straddling him. ‘Did anyone ever do that with you at the Grove?’ he rasped, Jack just shaking his head as he covered his eyes with his arm.

‘Always… made me take it… I… I liked it,’ he heaved, and Leo’s dick twitched so hard in his pants that he needed to get them off before he broke the old zipper. He didn’t take himself out, there was no way Jack would want to go again even if he was able to after coming that hard, and he gave himself a few tugs out of sight to ease the pressure before noticing that Jack was watching him again. He breathed a little heavier as he stroked himself again, Jack’s eyes trailing down until there was no denying what he was looking at, Leo doing it again, then again, until he couldn’t take it.

He rested on his heels as he jerked himself off, Jack eagerly watching like he wanted more before he sat up, slid his legs further under Leo’s body so he could get closer. He didn’t ask for permission again, just went for it as he palmed his friend and felt the way his hand moved under his pants, and Leo groaned again at his curious fingers then slipping in beside his own. Jack silently pushed aside his hand to stroke him instead, and his hand was smooth from years of easy labour even though he worked so hard. He braced himself on Jack’s shoulders and moved his hips, properly fucked his hand when Jack pulled him out so he could see him too, the two of them moving with each other in a way that Leo had never done with any of the others.

Jack loved gently, even though there was desire behind it he made love, Leo knew that just from the way he was being held. He pushed aside thoughts of him touching Madeleine just as gently, thoughts he’d kept coming back to when Jack had been a little too affectionate while they were in public, but no matter what they kept returning until Jack noticed his distress. He kissed his neck again, did it the way he liked to, and there were no desperate bites, no marks left behind by men who wanted to get off and go back out there like this wasn't who they were.

Jack kissed him like he loved him, and if Leo were an emotional guy that might’ve wrung something out of him, but it didn’t entirely as he just let his nails dig into his back and leave behind proof that this was happening. ‘I want you to fuck me, as soon as I felt that man inside me I knew I wanted to feel you too,’ Jack whispered to him, not in a way to turn him on more, but to left out this secret that he’d been holding onto for years.

‘You gotta stop touching me in order for that to happen,’ Leo reminded him, but neither made the move to disconnect as his pleasure built higher and higher. Right when he was about to come he grabbed Jack by the wrist and got him to stop, if he just had tonight then he wanted to fuck him too, he wouldn’t accept that Jack wouldn’t pretend like this was more than just longful sex once the sun rose, and he went to his nightstand to pull out his lube and condoms.

‘No, we all had to wear them at the Grove, I want to feel you,’ Jack insisted as he placed his hand over the condom, and Leo shook his head.

‘I’ve been with too many men, and it’s been a while since I was tested with how busy this month was, I won’t put you at risk.’ It wasn't a lie, but he also didn’t want to know how Jack felt around him like that, how warm and tight he’d be when he finally pushed inside.

‘Then stop seeing them,’ Jack blurted out seriously, his hand closing around the condom and wrenching it from Leo’s grip, ‘just stop, you won’t need them anymore if you have- if we-’

‘I won’t tie you down as some random fuck whenever either of us needs it,’ Leo frowned, and Jack shook his head again, his shoulders hunching as he thought about how to word this.

‘You don’t understand, I don’t just want a random fuck, Leo.’ Now Jack was frowning, but Leo wouldn’t believe it, he couldn’t after wanting this for so long, and Jack broke him out of it by kissing him again. He didn’t pull away until Leo was kissing him back, and he brushed his curls aside as he rested his forehead against him, their faces mere inches apart. ‘You know me, you know how much I care for the ones I love, I don’t want you to just be a random fuck,’ he continued in a whisper, they were so close again, and Leo felt his hands grip Jack even harder. ‘I’ve wanted you ever since you helped me get in, long before I saw Minnie.’

‘You chose her,’ Leo finally said, he’d been holding it in for so long, and Jack nodded this time.

‘I loved her more than I have any other woman, but I’ve always loved you, too, I just couldn’t have you, not out there,’ Jack confessed to him, and for once Leo let himself get sentimental as he hugged Jack tightly.

‘You won’t be able to have me out there even after this, they don’t understand people like us,’ he said softly, Jack nodding again, ‘I can live with it with those men, I don’t love any of them, but you-’

Jack froze as Leo realized what he’d said, he’d admitted it, he hadn’t wanted to but it’d just come out, but Jack didn’t look like he was going to back out now that he knew exactly what was going on here. ‘As long as we’re here, they’ll never find us,’ he murmured so softly it was almost below a whisper, said only for him, ‘we don’t need the penthouse or my place, we can just come here.’

‘They’ll find it eventually if we keep being seen together, we can only explain away so much to those vultures out there,’ Leo said bitterly, but Jack was soft, he was so soft as he was the one to hush him, this was how he loved.

‘I’ve always pushed the boundaries on Night Owls, it might skyrocket the ratings if they learned that Mr. Midnight was a homosexual, or whatever I am,’ he didn’t exactly joke, but Leo still coughed out a laugh all the same.

‘A widowed TV host and his homosexual producer revealing themselves to be getting together behind the scenes, the media will have a fucking frenzy with that one,’ he agreed, and Jack kissed him again before tossing the condom out of reach even though there were more in the nightstand.

‘Exactly, so why don’t you fuck me for tonight, and we’ll figure this out tomorrow, just like we always do?’ Jack suggested as he broke away to lean back against the headboard; Leo didn’t need to be convinced any more after that, and together they finished stripping each other like this was their first time and they couldn’t wait to get to the main event. Jack was already getting hard as they ditched their clothes and started kissing again, and Leo was about to touch him before thinking of something. He quickly got up and locked his door, no one would be able to come in no matter what they heard now, and it wasn't perfect but it would have to do as he rejoined Jack on the bed.

‘How do you want me to do this, old man?’ Leo teased now that Jack had finally passed the final threshold before he reached 50s as of this year, and he thought about it before getting on his hands and knees. ‘That’s a young man’s position, you think your knees can handle it?’

‘You think you can make me come again before your back acts up?’ Jack teased right back since they were only a few months apart, and he smirked and rubbed himself against his ass to get him to shut up; this felt right, this was how they’d always talked even though Jack was pushing back against his dick for just a little more until he could fuck him. If he’d just bit the bullet and asked back then, threw out some subtle hints that maybe he was interested, could they have had this all this time? Could he have been the one Jack came home to after every show instead of her? He didn’t know with how long it took either of them to say something, but he was glad he could have it now as he lubed himself up and started to stretch Jack out. ‘Don’t waste time, they never did, we can go slow the next time we’re here, I want to spend the whole night with you.’

Leo didn’t like the thought of who knew how many men treating Jack like that, but they could unpack all of that later, for now he really needed to get off now that it was coming back to him again. He teased Jack for just a moment before pushing in, and it was too tight but he didn’t seem to mind it, Leo would have to teach him about actual gay foreplay at this rate, but Jack was right, they could do it when they could spend the whole night together. It took him another moment to set a pace, Jack felt even better than he expected and he couldn’t get enough of the slow drag until the head was catching on his rim and making him keen, and he repeated the action a few times before getting to it.

He was used to the position, to the feeling and sounds of men under him like this, but he wanted to forget it all and learn it all again as he ran his hands over Jack’s back and started to thrust. Already it sounded like it was too much for him, like he was about to come if he kept this up, and he alternated between going fast and hard enough to nearly make him shout and slowing down until it almost felt like torture. He rolled his hips as he slowed, made Jack feel every inch of him as he did, and he could see his arms shaking in the dim light, he couldn’t hold himself up for long at this rate. He splayed his hand over his lower back and pushed as he traveled down to the base of his skull, and he guided Jack to rest on the pillows before trailing his hand over his jaw and to his mouth.

‘Suck.’

Jack obeyed, he must’ve been used to this command because he gave a wanton clench as he ran his tongue over Leo’s fingers, and he shuddered at the feeling before fucking him hard again. Jack moaned around his fingers as they both got what they wanted, two men who couldn’t even hold hands out there finding solace in fucking in silence, in the safety of his home that was currently compromised by the people he’d so willingly invited in. They couldn’t take this from him, when Jack had married Madeleine he’d thought that he’d have to let him go for good, but fate had allowed him just this one happiness that hadn’t been bought, hadn’t been given to him on a silver platter.

It was real, it was his, and he removed his fingers from Jack’s mouth so he could grip him by the hip and the shoulder as his orgasm started to build.

Sweat was dripping off the both of them from the exertion, the bed creaking with each thrust, Jack’s sounds muffled by the pillows as he hung on for dear life, Leo so expertly quiet after a lifetime of hiding that this was easy for him until Jack turned his head to the side. He looked back at him, eyes half lidded, mouth slightly agape with a smile, and in that expression Leo saw not lust but love, he really did love him, and he reached around to quickly jerk Jack off until he was coming just so he didn’t have to look at that expression any longer. He practically cried into the pillow at the feeling of Leo still going until the sensation was too much and he came too, and he’d never had sex without a condom before, but fuck if he didn’t like the feeling of coming inside the man he was resting his forehead against.

He didn’t pull out at first, he physically couldn’t, but eventually he had to, they needed to get cleaned up and one of them needed to find a different place to sleep before the others awoke and saw them leaving together. He was already thinking about the dawn but Jack was still a Night Owl, and when Leo pulled out and moved to get up Jack was quick to pull him right back down. They bounced on the mattress and it gave a concernedly loud creak that had them both freeze, but there were no bangs on the wall to shut up, no signs that anyone had heard them at all.

Leo lay with his back to his friend, or whatever he was now, before he couldn’t take it anymore and turned to face him, and he wasn't surprised to see how wet Jack’s cheeks were. Here it came, now that it was over he’d realize that he’d said a lot of things he didn’t mean like all the others still in hiding, he wasn't ready for a relationship in general, let alone one with a man, the end was coming before the sun rose. But Jack never said he regretted it, he was crying but it wasn't in sorrow this time, and Leo just laid there as Jack reached up to trace the shapes of his face, learned them more intimately than anyone else ever had before.

‘I nearly asked you to dinner that day, when we were in the elevator,’ he said vaguely, but Leo still knew he meant the day they’d met. ‘I was so scared being up here, thought for sure I was going to fail and that I’d have to go back to Chicago to beg for my job back, but you… you’d been the first to see me, you believed in me, how- how’s a guy not supposed to fall in love with that?’

Leo swallowed, he’d know those words anywhere no matter how they were changed, and he swore he wasn't sentimental, but he thought he might be as Jack looked up at him with a vulnerability he hadn’t seen since the funeral. ‘It’s a good thing you didn’t, I would've made you buy,’ he joked, but Jack was serious, and he didn’t say anything as the other man leaned in to kiss him again. He didn’t know what an afterglow was like, he was used to the others getting up and leaving while he had a smoke and got back to work, that was what worked best for him now that he’d gotten it out of his system and could go another week pretending that he was into all the pretty girls who tried to woo him to get onto the show, just for a little bit.

He turned them all down, he couldn’t fake an orgasm to save his life and any one of those girls could out him on that when he didn’t let them on the show after such a poor performance, but now-

Now he wouldn’t have to, they would never ask Jack himself after crying on live TV over his wife, and now Jack could come to him whenever one of the guests got a little too friendly, he didn’t have to watch him entertain them anymore. He chuckled to himself when they parted before rolling over to grab a smoke from the other nightstand, losing himself in the thought all the way up to flicking the ignitor, and he stopped with the cigarette in his mouth before remembering that Jack had quit. He quickly apologized but Jack just took it from him, lit it up, and enjoyed one single puff before handing it over.

‘I’m more concerned with the drinking, little late to cure more lung cancer if I’ve got it,’ he figured as Leo took his own puff, although that thought of that made him falter and hold it a bit too long.

‘Should we get that checked when I make sure I’m clean this weekend?’ he suggested, but Jack shook his head.

‘Already did, it skipped me, but if you want to…’ He trailed off, Leo exhaling again before putting it out, he could live with that much. ‘I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you to it too, to see you like that, I wouldn’t be able to come back to the studio knowing you weren’t there, it was hard enough going home to an empty house back then,’ he admitted, and Leo swore to himself that he’d quit too, cold turkey, if it meant he wouldn’t put the man beside him through that again.

‘We can do that, then,’ he decided, their first decision as a whatever they were, and Jack slightly smiled at him as another tear fell. ‘Christ, never thought I’d get clean because of anyone, let alone because I wanna do it for you,’ he muttered like he truly couldn’t believe it, but deep down he knew that he would’ve done it sooner had Jack asked, would’ve done it the moment Madeleine got diagnosed if he’d said those words to him. He knew it, and he could’ve sworn that Jack knew it too as he found his hand and held it. 

Jack was always a cuddler, he liked to be near those he loved and it made him inseparable from Madeleine until the end, and while Leo exactly wasn't the physical affection type, he never could keep his hands off Jack, and he let him curl up against him with a sigh that didn’t sound as forced as he’d wanted.

‘Y'know we can’t tell Gus about us, right?’ he said to the ceiling when Jack started to fall asleep again, and he came back to life at the sound of Leo’s voice. ‘He’s a God fearing man, he’s bound to have a sermon or two ready if either of us let it slip.’

‘Gus is fine, he seemed surprisingly interested when I casually pitched to him the possibility of having Bianca and her wife come on to talk about their lives, they’ve been talking about telling their family,’ Jack yawned, Leo raising an eyebrow at him again.

‘Pretty personal confession to a patient,’ he frowned, and Jack shook his head as the sleep started to take him again.

‘I told her about myself, which prompted her to tell me, it’s because of her that I wanted to do this tonight,’ he confessed, he was too tired to save this for when he was fully conscious, and Leo rubbed at his eyes again at the mental image of Jack coming out to some random woman only to come to the conclusion that he needed to finally confess after what was probably a very long session about the both of them, not just him.

‘Should’ve told me after how long we’ve known each other, but… I guess I get it,’ he figured, Jack nodding just slightly over his chest, he was almost gone. ‘So we get these lesbians on air, talk about therapy or something, and then you and I announce to the whole world that we’re now, what? Fucking, dating, living together?’ Jack mumbled out a confirmation, he had no idea what was going on on the other side of his eyelids. ‘It sounds nice, honestly, to imagine a world where we could do that and now lose the show, and the crew.’ No response, just light snoring. ‘It’s nearly the 80s now, dawn of a new decade coming up in just a couple years, maybe times will change before the next century, maybe one day you can talk to everyone about your own life, and I’ll be out there with you.’

He was talking too much only because he knew Jack couldn’t hear him, he was sentimental.

‘I think I want that for us, if we’re really doing this, fuck, 49 years of hiding and sleeping around with whoever I could find out there, I dunno how you did it for so long,’ he continued quietly, or maybe he was thinking it, sleep was starting to take him too now that he finally knew how warm an afterglow could be. Jack had pulled himself over his arm, and Leo fought to bend it until he could hold him back, the latter now even more on his chest to allow it. He looked down at him in the dark, he’d wanted this sight for so long that he still couldn’t believe he could have it, and he was definitely sentimental as he leaned over just enough to press a kiss to the top of Jack’s head.

He felt him grin against his bare chest before draping a leg over him, he must’ve smothered Madeleine all the time in their bed back in the day, and he shut his eyes and willed her from his mind for good. He apologized to her as she left, but Jack wasn't the only one who hadn’t let her go in all this time, and he prayed that she could finally rest as he ran his fingers through the short strands at the back of Jack’s neck, he’d take care of him for her, for the both of them, from now on.

[wretchedgoth]

Late Night with the Devil (2024) Review

**Spoilers ahead**

I love that this sort of movie made it somewhat mainstream. It feels fresh and different to the majority of mainstream horror and that definitely helps it out a lot.

David Dastmalchian absolutely does not get enough credit for being such a good character actor, but I’m glad he’s getting his flowers for this because he truly is phenomenal here. Great comedic timing throughout and really embodies the late night host persona perfectly. Ingrid Torelli is also a standout in the creepy child role of Lilly, just perfectly unsettling.

Even though the movie occasionally breaks its 70s aesthetic and dedication to the tv show footage with the behind the scenes footage, I don’t think it takes too much away from how authentic the movie feels as a whole. The filmmakers are clearly passionate about late night shows and that is very much represented in the final product with the atmosphere it creates.

My only issues with this movie, besides the use of AI, are some of the digital effects towards the end of the movie. When the movie is clearly well researched and dedicated to its 70s aesthetic and atmosphere, some of the effects choices just really take you out of it for a moment. The effect of Madeleine’s ghost behind Jack and Gus’ neck snap in particular just don’t look very good at all in my opinion. Luckily, the montage inside of Jack Delroy’s head at the end makes up for it.

I truly would love to give this 5 stars for the use of AI really puts me off. You can make the argument that this was filmed before the big discussion around AI began, however for a movie that touches upon media ethics and similar ideas, it feels a little hypocritical to go ahead and use something that could be considered controversial like that.

My Rating: 9/10

[usagirotten]

Movie Review: Late Night with the Devil is simple, honest, disturbing, terrifying and sinisterly entertaining

Streaming platforms have had a great boom since what happened with SARS-CoV-2, the options to hire have been many and varied, and each one has specialized in the material they present, with Netflix being the most popular. There are other more specialized and simpler platforms, their original productions may or may not be liked by locals and strangers, many of these are a pleasant surprise for their stories and how they have been presented, in this case, Shudder is an OTT video service on demand by American subscription that offers, among other things, series and films of horror, suspense and supernatural fiction, owned and operated by AMC Networks, they are the ones that have best known how to take advantage of the resource that this genre provides. Its programming sponsors work from different countries, including the United States (Christmas Presence -2019), Germany (Party Hard, Die Young -2019), Mexico (Belzebuth (2019), Argentina (Terrified -2019), Indonesia (Impetigore - 2020), France (The Room -2020), Australia (The Marshes -2020), Canada (Bleed with Me -2021) and South Korea (The Wrath -2019) among others. In 2024 they surprise us again with a production between Australia and the United States, Late Night with the Devil by directors Colin and Cameron Cairnes is much more than what may seem at first glance, a background that becomes increasingly more sinister.

What is the movie about?

Night Owls with Jack Delroy (David Dastmalchian) is a late-night talk and variety show that is about to have one of its most disturbing broadcasts, the events that occurred on Halloween night in 1977. Its popular host attempts to increase ratings by inviting a girl supposedly possessed by a demon, the revelations and events during this event will be sinister and terrifying for its audience. The premiere of this film is not intended to pay tribute or show the dirt behind this type of variety program, what it intends to do is tell a series of events that happened due to doing unknown things that turn out to be very dangerous, a mockery of the broadcasts of this type today where it is more important to have a high rating that shows content that we might think is rehearsed and done on purpose to keep its audience captive for a couple of hours. The film is set in 1977 and invents a program on a commercial television network in Chicago, something that aims to compete with others such as the one hosted by Johnny Carson, the program has been on the air for six seasons and its audience ratings have never been the best, consider that their content is boring and that they need to have something very spectacular to surpass the others and steal the attention of the public, a strategy will give them that opportunity and the consequences of this will be fatal and the much promised night of terror that they have promised will become something more than that.

The film's prologue opens as a documentary that investigates and presents an inexplicable event that occurred on Halloween night in 1977, during the live broadcast of an episode of the sixth season of the late-night variety show “Night Owls with Jack Delroy” to increase the show's ratings, decides that its strategy will be to make a special episode with an occult and paranormal theme on Halloween, special guests include self-proclaimed psychic and medium Christou (Fayssal Bazzi), skeptic and former magician Carmichael Haig (Ian Bliss), parapsychologist author June Ross-Mitchell (Laura Gordon) and Lilly D'Abo (Ingrid Torelli). During the broadcast and the back and forth about the subject and the integrity of this During Christou has a premonition about someone called "Minnie", Jack surprised by this reveals that it was his affectionate way of calling his wife Madeleine (Georgina Haig) who died due to cancer, after this vision, Christou suddenly falls ill and vomits a black liquid and is immediately rushed to the hospital during the commercial break, for Jack, things are going better than he expected in the segment following the cut, June tells them presents Lilly as the only survivor of a mass suicide committed by a satanic church that worshiped the demon Abraxas, despite June's warnings about the possible consequences of interviewing her. Jack convinces her to conjure the demon whom the girl calls Mr. Wriggles, during another commercial break the team informs Jack that Christou died from a hemorrhage in the ambulance taking him to the Hospital. It is to be expected that things will not go well at all and during June's spell, Lilly is possessed by Mr. Wriggles levitating in her chair and making his presence manifest with glitches in the light of the study while this happens Carmichael challenges June subjecting Gus McConnell, Jack's partner, to a demonstration of hypnotism, which causes everyone in the studio to see worms coming out of his body to the surprise of everyone present, the production team rewinds the recorded footage and demonstrates that this act has It has been an elaborate hallucination experienced by everyone in the studio, but the paranormal phenomena that occur during June's spell appear unchanged and they deduce that there is no trick and that everything is real. Jack is completely horrified when he sees his dead wife behind him on tape, Carmichael accuses Jack of presenting what happens as an elaborate hoax, Lilly becomes possessed again, a beam of light comes from the ceiling and connects to her left hand, another beam comes out of a television monitor and connects to his right hand, his head opens from which a bright light emerges, using telekinesis he throws Jack against a wall and then mercilessly kills Gus, June and Carmichael. At this point things are already out of control, the audience and the ratings are through the roof, and the executives think that all this has been an elaborate plot that is working extremely well and better than they thought, in the studio Jack is inexplicably transported to an alternate version of the show, to his worst nightmare reliving moments from the past before it is revealed to us that he has a connection with the demon that possesses Lilly and remembering that he already knew him during a ceremony at The Grove, then they reveal to us that has also been responsible for cancer that killed his wife in exchange for the sudden success and rise of his career and his show, a terrifying version of Madeline confronts Jack, blaming him for her death and asks him to end everything once and for all. that he has unleashed, this is how, using the ritual dagger of the ancient cult that has been used to make the spell, he stabs Madeleine to death, moments later he finds himself in an empty study where he sees with horror that he has stabbed Lilly to death on sight. from everyone and in a live broadcast. Disturbed and standing next to the lifeless bodies of his guests, he hears the police sirens arriving at the scene.

We are faced with a film that knows perfectly well what it wants to offer, that respects its own rules and those of the genre it occupies, and that, without being a marvel, manages to have a good development in its narrative, thereby generating the interest of the viewers until its end. , the proposal itself is honest and clean when presenting explicitly violent scenes The story is simple and does not need to rely on subplots that go nowhere, what we are told here is clear and concise, and in addition to the graphic horror it has the exact dose of tension that is needed to recreate something like this, the script was written by Colin and Cameron Cairne, it has sudden twists and disturbing revelations towards its end and justifies each of the actions that the characters have, and if that were not enough it also presents us with what is behind these presenters and how the entertainment industry is managed in this type of variety and interview programs, revealing that not everything is as we think, that not all that glamor we see is entirely true. This work is not completely perfect but it is very close to being so, the setting of the 70s is almost exact, the filmmakers took care of even the smallest detail to convince us as an audience that what we see is authentic, the cinematography and The filters they use make everything look old and even decadent in an era in which changes aimed to risk-taking things to a much larger medium and to another level when it comes to prime time. The camera work, lighting, and photography stand out and perfectly accompany the plot, which, being modest, are spectacular in some shots. The directors know perfectly well how to coordinate their ideas so that everything looks more real and convincing, as does their makeup. costumes and the very few traditional special effects with a mix of AI for some shots, leaving aside the CGI to make all this something simple but with a very particular style that is what cinema needs today. It could be perfect if the film didn't trip over itself again and again insisting that what we see is something they found in footage that is gradually being built, although there is no room for a trite and boring moral message. what he wants when he wants without following a parameter established by American talk shows and variety shows in the 70s, it seems that at times they cannot agree between still shots and those with a camera in hand so the editing is fluid and more in line with the type of cinematography you need. It is clear and direct in what it means, showing how far human ambition can go when wanting more than what you have, crossing the limits of everything established, and playing to know that you can handle any situation, no matter how unknown, transgressing with unknown topics. and dangerous can have fatal consequences, paranormal themes are what have had the most acceptance in this genre today, and fear of the unknown and easy scares are what they shamelessly make fun of here doing extremely well, each act has a consequence whether or not within a fantastic world or in the reality in which we live.

What is the cast of this movie?

The cast is made up of David Dastmalchian, Laura Gordon, Ian Bliss, Fayssal Bazzi, Ingrid Torelli, Rhys Auteri, Georgina Haig, and Josh Quong Tart, who are more than correct in their interpretations of each of their characters and understand perfectly well what we can expect from each of them in a film of this type.

Who composed the music?

The music composed by Glenn Richards and Roscoe James Irwin also stands out with its nostalgic and bombastic notes of this era, mixing them with something more current that grates in some scenes and can almost make our hair stand on end, a very worthy work that perfectly complements everything. the audiovisual that it presents to us. It is worth mentioning that its propaganda and visual aesthetics advocate a lot for nostalgia, its poster and even the trailer remind us of those seventies horror films that had impeccable art, and images that invited us and made us have a genuine and authentic interest in what they We wanted to see something simple but attractive that leaves us with that mystery and wondering what this or that film will be about, something that recreates the decade very well, that stimulates without pretending to be something that it is not, in this we can say that it pays a well-deserved tribute to all those involved in the design of this art and concept. In summary, Late Night with the Devil is not a film that boasts of being a great blockbuster or that has one of the most impressive casts in recent years, it stands out, especially in its simplicity and what it does, it does well and fulfills very well. well, the task of entertaining and earning a lot with very little, which is no small feat for an audience that has become more demanding over the years, a film that does not go unnoticed and that, from its title and propaganda, draws attention either by morbidity or the desire to want to see something new that has nothing to do with a remake or a reboot of something that was already successful, one more demonstration that ingenuity counts more when telling things than millions of dollars invested in a product that it necessarily has to work. Very good for Shudder, which takes the risk of having different content and allows filmmakers and directors to present projects that could hardly reach movie theaters in other countries or that are discarded from a highly competitive industry that only seeks It's staying current with any shit by pretending it's the best thing we as an audience have ever seen. Late Night with the Devil is now available on the Shudder platform. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YeKYfneOH3o Read the full article

[samuhelll]

“Yeah. Alright.” Sam sounds dry. Then, drawling- “Thinking Woman’s Sex Symbol.”

Jack nudges him. They finally make it to the car, and across from him at the passenger’s side, Sam stands looking over the roof, the lights throwing white squares into his eyes. “Hit the radio,” he tells him, pulling the car door open. “Coming to you live— Broadway on wheels.”

Jack’s place looks exactly like what a home occupied by Jack Delroy would look like, save for this: a woman’s touch. He can see traces of Madeleine in it from the drapes down to the contents of the cupboard, maybe even a designated ashtray by the balcony because sorry, no smoking inside. Madeline isn’t here tonight, though. So at an impossibly late hour, overlooking an empty street, no one will tell them no to the carton of cigarettes. The bottled beer. The cheesecake.

“...Jury’s still out,” Sam finally answers, adjusting the volume to the hi-fi. He steps back out to the balcony, door open. “I go where the people need me. It’s like, ‘Where’s Sam?’ and poof!” he exclaims, spreading his hand wide. “I’m there.” 

Of course jazz is playing. Jack’s go-to choice.

“Houdini’s got nothing on me,” he murmurs, smiling. “But, uh- hey. Ask me nicely, and who knows?”

Go ahead, Jack. Tell him, Please, Sam, will you stay a little longer?

[please stand by...] 〝 𝙻𝙾𝙾𝙺𝚂 𝚆𝙷𝙾'𝚂 𝚃𝙰𝙻𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶, 𝙼𝚁. 𝚂𝙸𝙻𝚅𝙴𝚁 𝚃𝙾𝙽𝙶𝚄𝙴! No one does it sweeter than you! But hey, that won't stop me from trying. I've got a reputation to uphold, y'know, and I play for keeps. Can't have anyone charming me out of a job, not even you. Carson gives me enough trouble as it is. 〞 A wink and a nudge— 𝙰𝙻𝙻 𝚂𝙼𝙸𝙻𝙴𝚂 indeed. By now Jack's beaming, he can't help it, not when Sam makes it so 𝙴𝙰𝚂𝚈. Theirs is a rapport he's happy to fall into.

〝 She's visiting family, actually. Someone out there's getting married... Didn't have a chance to catch too many of the details. 〞 One of the many downsides of being damn near 𝙽𝙾𝙲𝚃𝚄𝚁𝙽𝙰𝙻. Jack shrugs. He's used to it, the disconnect. 〝 Won't be back until Monday. She's got the whole weekend to try and relax, but something tells me they're going to ask her to sing. They usually do. She is a Broadway star, after all. 〞 And an incredible one at that. 𝙱𝚁𝙴𝙰𝚃𝙷𝚃𝙰𝙺𝙸𝙽𝙶 like none other.

〝 .. Beer and cheesecake sounds great right about now. 〞 Not that Jack needs any convincing... A testament to that silver tongue. Really, Sam could make anything sound good; 𝙰 𝙼𝙰𝚁𝙰𝚃𝙷𝙾𝙽 𝚃𝙷𝚁𝙾𝚄𝙶𝙷 𝙷𝙴𝙻𝙻 becomes a walk in the park. 〝 It's decided, then: my place it is. 〞

It doesn't take more than a skip, hop and a jump to get there. The hi-fi sings low and sweet, something to soothe the nerves New York always seems so eager to frazzle. Jack smiles as he dips a knife into their dessert. 〝 You decide how long you'll be in town for yet? I could get you a ticket to the show, come Monday. 〞

[tenderhungering]

so if you need to be mean / be mean to me / i can take it / and put it inside of me

[tenderhungering]

howdy howdy!!! do u have any thoughts on jack’s background? I think it’s really interesting the few tidbits we have (Illinois Boy™️, the Oh Calcutta story, getting his start in radio) + in the case of those first two its like. clearly been told time and time again for an audience. or if you’d prefer something else any thoughts on minnie 🙏😭 haunting the narrative icon

hello hello ! i so wish we’d gotten a little bit more about him but i’ve always imagined jack as being a little more introverted in his younger years? i think he really enjoys validation and this is such a difficult thing to achieve as someone as slightly awkward as jack. (don’t know why. maybe i just enjoy pathetic men but his blushing at naked bodies and his little “oh! not my chair!” has always made me feel like he has had to build up this persona he has made for himself) charming and quick-witted but very easily crumbles whenever he’s in an uncomfortable position (he seems to almost dissociate often?)

i think he might’ve been in some sort of college radio and broadcast (i’ve discussed this with a friend before!), and he was just so happy to build an audience. there’s no mention of his parents (my memory is foggy!) so part of me thinks that they’re either not in the picture or he’s lost them? so you know,,, mommy and daddy issues galore despite either one. maybe even one of them didn’t think being someone on television would maintain a steady flow of income. regardless, it might make him more interested in gaining that connection with the audience, getting validated for his feelings. getting praise for it. no you’re so cool please continue to make your show! i’m such a big fan!

he doesn’t know who is there for him as Mr. Midnight and who is there for him Jack Delroy so he blurs the line and vents to his audience, looks at the camera with every intention to impress.

i imagine meeting minnie was very sweet though. they were both sort of up and coming and it’s nice to have someone who understands that struggle! i imagine minnie being in theatre makes her the more extroverted out of the two ! (she was the one sharing stories and jack getting shy about them!), but also a lot more open about her emotions. jack seems like someone who keeps to himself and doesn’t quite understand how to communicate well (he does hide a lot from others when they ask what’s going on. might just be that 70s toxic masculinity upbringing that makes him unable to express these,, daddy issues? who knows!)

i do fully believe he loved her though! younger jack probably never dreamed of finding a girl like minnie. maybe a bit of idealization for her occurred earlier on but minnie was so fresh and bright and full of life even during her time spent ill that i always thought she just good humor and a knack for just being naturally talented at the arts.

which is a big difference between the two! minnie just had that spark of life, she was always going to end up being someone big, she knew how to capture a room. jack was awkward and had to find his voice, he had to learn what people liked, what good jokes landed and how to deliver them, he had to work hard (and i don’t mean this as minnie not working hard! jack just had to work to become this persona while minnie was able to become her characters almost immediately, she’s able to understand their emotions and feel for them immediately. i think it makes her a much more empathetic person while jack is a lot more sympathetic. jack needs to be verbally told what people are feeling which might be why ratings are so comforting. they’re either good or bad! they’re easy to read.) and become who we know as Mr. Midnight. something of an artist obsessed with not their craft but what their craft will mean to others

sorry if this wasn’t exactly background stuff pfft! i more so focused on how their personalities were! i do think that minnie was possibly in dance, and has that ability to be able to play a song after she hears it on time on the piano. i think she has to teach jack how to pick up on it though, he’s sort of stumbling and his keys are sour baha. he probably used to stay up late studying little mannerisms talk shows had. i think he has a natural charm to him but that charm is a lot more meek than what we see? i love them both dearly,,,

[tenderhungering]

Hey, that's no way to say goodbye.

[tenderhungering]

well, yes!

[tenderhungering]

Have you noticed how women are used in the film? Their suffering, grief, ambitions and even deaths. It all benefits the men.

yes, i have! i think it was during the first time i watched with two of my friends that we mentioned how fucked up it seemed to bring in lilly. she was an abused child in circumstances that june describes as inhumane and now she's supposed to come on and chat about said abuse.

to better delve into this though, i'm going to do a little ramble on each female character (i've been meaning to this regardless so this question has me excited!)

Lilly

as i mentioned before, lilly, to the public, is an abused child who has been rescued from a cult and is now the subject of dr. june's book. i believe that june really did care for lilly but she in a way, was still benefiting from her by writing about her. something to study while parenting. reminds me a bit about parents who write about raising troubled children.

jack brings them onto the show almost because he knows how shocking this is to audiences, to have survived what lilly did. i think that fear and shame but also desire kiss on the mouth. the public both fears the occult but want to learn more, there is some sort of fascination with the idea of someone being in it and being able to get out of it (would people do the same?). lilly is a spectacle. she is to go from not knowing the outside world to standing in front of the camera and expecting to behave like a typical girl her age. it's almost like she has to prove herself well-adjusted after her trauma.

june explains to her that everyone having a demon inside of them, acknowledging that lilly's might be a little more literal but because the demon serves as a stark reminder of her time in the cult, it's similar to someone working around their triggers. everyone has hurt in them. like a therapist helping you work with carrying that hurt rather than just suppressing it. clearly the demon leaves lilly exhausted, upset and feel not like herself. she's crying after her scene and asking june as to why she's hurt her, and apologizing for whatever happened when Mr. Wriggles was there. she is not in control of her actions. but jack wants more. he's momentarily sympathetic but realizes that it's getting him higher ratings. the more hurt is displayed, the happier than the media is.

even in the final scene, when the demon possesses her, we can see it in her face that she's distraught. confused. but all the camera does is zoom in on her expression,

June

june is so intriguing to me as a character because it's almost as though her instinct toward things is a calm and collected behavior, one that thinks of the ethics of it, whether anyone will get hurt, but her decisions are so easily swayed by jack. and he knows exactly what to tell her too. Everyone finally take you seriously. It is the 70s so there's no surprise that misogyny is rampant (though the 70s did introduce the second wave of feminism, she may be a representation of challenging attitudes as well). june is a very passionate woman in her studies, she'd be considered an expert in the field but this is almost immediately dismissed as soon as she's introduced as a doctor. you call yourself that. is that what you believe you are? can you prove you are?

i think it makes june feel better if everyone has a distance from lilly - hence writing a book about her. you can know lilly through the pages. you don't need to make her suffer for views then, you can educate yourself on what was happened to her and understand she's hurt more than necessary. she might've felt the need to write the book for them both. lilly need to be understood and emphasized with as more than just a "child of d'abo". but jack invites her with the idea of simply talking about said book, one of her biggest accomplishments and instead wants to treat them like some sort of circus act. do a trick for me, june! you know how to! it's not enough that you tell me you know, you have to show me, you have to prove yourself to me, the camera makes it real.

it is that logic that sometimes makes her feel inclined to prove herself. and sometimes this is at the cost of her own morals.

Minnie

my beautiful wife,,,

i love minnie. so much. i've written a bit about how i think she was prior to her death in other asks but i never quite touch so much on how much she was exploited by both jack and the industry.

to be ill is a personal affair. and it was on all the tabloids whenever minnie was diagnosed with cancer (even if she did not smoke! i mention this because while smoking might contribute to lung cancer, it did feel like an odd mention that they'd pay so much attention to whether or not she did? it might've been to emphasize how sudden this all was but i'd also like to throw in that perhaps she was also just taking care of her voice! she was in theatre.) she has no privacy to mourn the gradual loss of her life. some people believe the cult was implied to be the one who had made this illness manifest for her which is awful in its own regard and more so when one considers the fact they did it to get to jack. almost as though minnie is an extension of himself and not his own person.

jack inviting her to the show could very well be done just because he wanted to invite his wife (though it does feel a bit odd he waited till she was sick to do this. maybe it was some sort of public gesture of affection, they both live to entertain, it's their job) but there's something saddening about the ordeal. it's almost as though knowing minnie was sick was not enough, the public had to see her in order to have some sort of confirmation. and the immediate comment about inviting her over being followed how even then, this wasn't enough to surpass johnny carson is morbid to say the least. almost as though minnie had just been used as a way to gain better ratings. sympathy ratings. i don't want to remove any agency of minnie, it might have been her decision to go on the show but the public's reaction to is that is what is more concerning.

even her death was simply a sacrifice. she was nothing more than a missing puzzle piece to have jack move forward (or downwards?). something that would benefit jack. as all the women in the film have been. each with such distinct personalties and motives to what keeps them going (or who are still amidst figuring out what they'd want out of life) being only part of a larger scheme where men are the benefactors. the grove only allowed men. the cult birthed sacrifices from their women. women are a stepping stone. a chess piece. something that needs to bleed for someone who demands it.

i love writing about how compelling these characters are! so sorry if sometimes my ramblings feel leaning more towards just dissection rather than downright analysis! i hope it gave some insight though!

[tenderhungering]

i will retire to the salton sea / at the age of twenty-three / for i’m starting to learn i may never be free / but though i may never be free / fuck you and your money / i’m tired of your money

and i sit on the curb cause it’s the prettiest night / with no one else in sight / you know i wore this dress for you / these killer heels for you

[tenderhungering]

Why was Minnie's spirit so powerful? Do you think she was always the cults main goal and Jack was just used so they could get her soul?

ooh, this is so fun ? i’ve always assumed minnie was powerful enough to show up throughout the film (she’s in a lot of reflections and static!) because she had been a sacrifice, thus not dying of natural non-occult causes so she’s sort of stuck in this haunting the earth (and narrative) stage? almost forced to die for the cause and now having to spend eternity serving it. she wasn’t a vessel prior but maybe she is now. i think she had her own agenda as a spirit though — i’ve mentioned this in another post but she seems above all to want to communicate with jack? minnie’s ghost doesn’t seem very violent? whenever abraxas is present is whenever things turn for the worst, but most of what we see of minnie is just her causing the cameras to have static, appearing throughout the film on camera (maybe this is due to being in the industry! the camera loves her, hah.)

side note, i’ve always pegged her as being the more extroverted of the two (between her and jack), the natural performer, the one with the ability to captivate an audience even during her illness, so she would have definitely been more sought out? maybe they figured they could use jack as a pawn to get to her — jack is famous enough to garner attention but not so high up amongst politicians, giants of industry, and whatnot that it would be a loss to their cult (which by the way, the mention of jack’s show gaining them more money because people are realizing the cult’s power is insane? he was being praised for bringing them in more money) financially or reputation wise. or even, the thought of how much jack is willing to sacrifice as a man who feels like he has so little. jack is essentially not important enough wherever he may go and remains a pawn to everything he may throw himself to, he is never meant to be nothing more than a disposable piece of the game. there can always come more jacks. people have always been wanting more

[bonesaremoney]

Very newly bereaved Jack Delroy having a long drunk cry to You Belong to Me by Patsy Cline because he absolutely drunk danced with Madeleine to that at their wedding, no notes