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#a little bit of author honesty
edupunkn00b · 2 months
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Hey hey Edu! I am having a day™️today and I have been thinking about why it is so hard for me to reread "What Might Have Been", but not "The Uses of Adversity"
Buckle up, there are spoilers for anyone who somehow has not read those masterpieces already
So, I think, I figured out my difficulty with WMHB is that at the core, I can barely cope with how much Remus spirals in that fic. The way he loses his grasp on himself more and more, the way his mind offers him another reality to deal with the how his life is getting out of order just- it did blindside me. Not because it's unrealistic or because you wrote it badly.
I think it just took me so off-guard after reading Happily Ever After where Remus, may have struggled but ended up helping Logan so often. Like, there is this underlying strength in his character that I adored. This hope and playfulness that never seized to show up.
And then he falls apart. It all falls apart and shatters. And I know that people do that. I know that characters do that and that it creates so much more interesting stories.
Later in different tidbits you show us how Remus was, versions of Remus and how he self-destructed before. You showed us better versions of himself, where he gets help earlier, chooses different paths, is able to choose different paths.
So it makes sense that he spirals, gets worse than ever before.
It just hurts so much because to me, it felt like he had it already. It felt like he was out of the woods. It felt like he had gotten better and was stronger than this. But the problem is that healing isn't linear. Sometimes you don't heal at all. Sometimes you just deal with the chipped state you're in.
And I think that was the thing that hurt. That Remus wasn't broken, but chipped. He seemed fine. He seemed to be doing well, to adjust, to grow. But he wasn't really broken, he was just chipped. He is chipped. And that is not something to be fixed but to be dealt with. And it's exhausting and tiresome if you don't know how to do it or have lost the motivation to do it.
But in TUoA we have Logan. And this version of Logan, who has suffered so much and is hurt and fearful and so very much in pain is less painful for me to see than WMHB Remus could ever be. Because that Logan has been broken. That Logan has been irreparably changed and will never be the same again.
And yet. And yet he gets the chance to become someone new. He gets the chance to be put back together in a new way. He gets to have Roman by his side, who looks at his broken pieces with love and care and is with him anyway.
And I think that hit less hard than what happened with Remus and feels more hopeful to me even though I understand that there is much more to come for Logan in that universe. But maybe, he'll be spared to have his son admitted to a mental hospital. Maybe he'll he spared to see his love fall apart because of something he couldn't have.
Maybe at least this portion of his life ends up being gentler than what WMHB would have given him.
Yeah.
I am very normal about your fics.
Kudos.
First of all, all the hugs in the world for you, Eir <3. You are beautiful inside and out and I hope you know that your stories touch me in so many of the same ways you're describing. (Most especially Life on Crow Avenue and Words Are Hard.) <3
I first read your note last night and had to sit with it because you're right, at the core of Remus' journey in What Might Have Been is the terrible truth that mental illness doesn't just go away. It can be managed to varying levels but it won't ever simply 'heal' like a cold or a broken leg. It's always there with us.
That was a difficult lesson for me to learn and one I'm probably still learning. I knew it intellectually but there have been times when life decided I needed to really learn it.
So many of us are those chipped cups, sitting on a shelf or serving some purpose. Just like those chipped cups, some of us break more easily than someone who has never been cracked and we do require extra care.
When I wrote Happily Ever After, I intended it to be a fairy tale. A fantasy, my fantasy, of what my life could have been like had I had friends like Janus and Roman in my life during my darkest times. Of how much stronger and better I could be if I'd had the support they gave him over the years.
I structured it like a fairy tale, took every chapter title from the first line of famous books. Logan started the story sad but unbroken, still surrounded by love and support. He ended the story discovering what I discovered about my self, ended the story with love for him and promising futures for his children. It was my dream fairy tale ending.
And it was completely unrealistic.
After sitting with the story for bit, I wanted to see how that might have actually happened, what a real ending to Logan's story might have been like, because if I could make Logan's fairy tale ending more realistic, I could make it realistic for me, too. That if in the more realistic version when Remus couldn't just bounce back again this time, if in even that version, he and Logan (and Janus and Roman and all of them) could still find a happy ending, I knew I could, too.
The Uses of Adversity is the same tale but backwards. What could possibly lead Logan to a happy ending when he started without Janus as a friend? The first part of TUoA, It Could Always Be Worse was very dark and was nearly even darker. I wasn't sure how it would end until I got to the last chapter. The original tags included an "author chose not to use Archive warnings" tag because that story nearly ended very differently.
Strangely, The Uses of Adversity, as straightforward as Logan and Roman's love story was, was much harder to write than WMHB or any of the other tales.
I hope that for every person who can't ever go back to WMHB, there's a person who reads it and can see that happy endings aren't just for fairy tales. That we can go through it all and still find a way to happiness in the end. That, chipped and broken and spiraling, there's always another chance for us to pick ourselves up or to allow ourselves be picked up, and keep on going toward a place of warmth and joy.
No matter what we've been through, it's never too late to build joyful connections with other people. It's never too late for a happy ending.
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theostrophywife · 3 months
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MOONLIGHT
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🤍 pairing: theodore nott x reader.
🤍 song inspiration: moonlight by kali uchis.
🤍 author's note: high! theo is the best kind of theo. gif credit to @dramaticals
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A thick cloud of smoke permeated the air, making the room as hazy as your drug addled mind. Theo shifted in your lap and silently held the joint up to your lips. You smiled down at your best friend, his watercolour eyes as red-rimmed as your own yet still full of that familiar sharp intensity as he watched you with curious intent. Wrapping your lips around the blunt, you shied away from his gaze and inhaled generously. 
As the smoke filled your lungs, you felt your body relax. With an exhale, the terrible day you endured was gone in a breath. You rested against the headboard and let your eyes shut close. Theo traced circles on your skin, happily humming away while you scratched his head. Smoking always made the two of you more touchy and giggly, blurring the lines even more than they already were. 
Not that you were complaining.
A late night smoke session was exactly what you needed. Usually, the two of you would be indulging in Neville’s newest strain up in the Astronomy Tower, but thanks to the storm raging outside, you and Theo were confined to his dorm instead. 
In all honesty, you didn’t mind. Especially since Theo had a generous stash of snacks to pilfer through. 
“This new shit is strong,” Theo remarked, coughing a bit as he waved away the smoke. Above you, rain drops pelted the skylight in a soothing rhythm. “How does Longbottom even come up with this stuff?” 
“Because,” you drawled, every syllable slow and syrupy. “Neville actually pays attention in Herbology instead of skipping class and getting into fights.” 
“That’s the pot calling the kettle black, bella,” Theo pouted as he poked his nose against your stomach. “Didn’t you get detention for taking a swing at Cho this morning?” 
“She called me a slag,” you recalled with a frown. While you had no problem with Cho, she seemed to have a problem with you. All thanks to a certain Hufflepuff. Theo tensed underneath you, his anger simmering beneath the surface. “As if it’s my fault her boyfriend can’t stop staring at my arse.” 
“You should’ve told me. I would’ve taken care of it.”
You sighed deeply. “That’s exactly why I didn’t tell you, Teddy. You tend to be a little overdramatic.” 
“Me?” Theo asked incredulously as he placed the joint on its holder. “Overdramatic? That’s absolutely absurd.” 
“I know you hated Cedric. When we were dating, he told me you threatened to beat his face in if he ever broke my heart.” Your best friend began to protest, but you held your hand up. You didn't fault him for being overprotective. After all, you've been friends with Theo long enough to know that this is just how he showed that he cared. “I'm not mad. I just didn’t want to add fuel to the fire.” 
“That stupid prat poured gasoline on the fire and lit the goddamn match the day he made you cry.” Theo ranted, his eyes glazing over with fury. “I should've made good on my promise to beat his fucking face in. He’s lucky you stopped me before I sent him to the infirmary.”
"It's not worth it, Teddy."
Your best friend shook his head. "It's always worth it when it comes to you."
“You shouldn’t get into trouble just because I have terrible taste in men.” Time and time again, Theo warned you about the guys you chose to date, but you were too stubborn to listen. You laughed humorlessly. “I really know how to pick them, don’t I?”
“Hey,” Theo whispered softly, tracing soothing circles on your back. “It’s not your fault your ex-boyfriend’s a prick. He’s an idiot for fumbling you.” 
You smiled as you ran your fingers through his hair. “Thanks, Teddy.” He hummed and squeezed your hip. “It’s not like I’m that broken up about it. I’ve just come to accept the fact that my love life is a complete shit show.” 
“That bad, huh?” 
“Don’t get me wrong, Cedric had his moments, but even when things were good, it always felt like something was missing. We just weren’t compatible,” you paused as you considered your words. “Cedric and I weren’t a good match. Mentally, emotionally, and physically.” 
Theo cocked his head curiously. “What do you mean?” 
Given your longstanding friendship and history, there were virtually no secrets between you and Theo, but there were aspects of your past relationship with Cedric that you weren’t as forthcoming about. Your best friend wasn’t exactly your ex-boyfriend’s biggest fan, so you skimped out on on the details to keep the peace. That was long gone now.
“Our sex life was kind of…bland.” 
Piercing blue eyes zeroed in on you. “What do you mean by bland?” Theo pushed himself upright, his face mere inches away from yours. “Was it just missionary and a polite handshake afterwards? Honestly, Diggory seems like the type.” 
You snorted in response. Theo wasn’t that far off the mark. “Basically, yeah. I just don’t think we were sexually compatible. Plus, he never wanted to go down on me.” 
Theo looked absolutely appalled. “What?” 
“Well, we tried and it didn’t really work. It’s not his fault, though. Oral just doesn’t do it for me. I’ve never…” you flushed as you rushed past the embarrassment of admitting such intimate details to your best friend. “I’ve never finished that way. I think it’s just a me problem.” 
“Let me get this straight,” Theo said matter-of-factly. “Cedric ate you out once, couldn’t make you cum, and then made you think it was somehow your fault?” 
“Cedric wasn’t a dick about it or anything,” you said rather lamely. “He just never tried again, so I figured that was that.” 
“That’s a fucking shame.” 
You shrugged. The past was in the past. It wasn’t like you could change things now. “It’s alright. Like I said, maybe it’s just not for me.” 
Theo stared at you. “You’re just saying that because he didn’t do his job properly.” 
You rolled your eyes in response, playfully smacking his arm. “And you’re suddenly an expert on the matter, Teddy?”
“I sure am,” Theo exclaimed proudly. “Cedric’s a coward for backing out after the first try. I mean, sure, it took me ages to get the hang of it, but now eating pussy is my favorite thing in the world.” 
Heat flooded your cheeks. Part of it was shock and the other — well, you didn’t want to think of what that other part might mean. Talking about sex wasn’t anything new for the two of you, but it was always in a teasing way. It was never quite this personal. 
“Oh,” you said after a moment. Theo watched as you shifted, trying to alleviate the building pressure between your legs. “I didn’t realize…” 
“That I love eating pussy?” Theo asked with a smirk. You knew he was doing it on purpose. He never missed out on the chance to tease you. “I’m really fucking good at it too.” 
You didn’t doubt it. While you tried not to feed into the rumors of your best friend’s bedroom habits, you knew that he was much more experienced than you were. Judging by the longing stares that followed in his wake, Theo wasn't the type to leave his lover unsatisfied.
After a moment, Theo spoke. “I can show you,” he rasped, that thick Italian accent of his bleeding through the words like it did every time he smoked. “If you’d like.” 
You blinked in surprise, practically gaping at your best friend. “You want to eat me out?” 
Theo nodded, his eyes dipping to your mouth as you anxiously chewed on your bottom lip. “More than anything in the fucking world.” 
The intensity of his gaze sent a shiver down your spine. “Let me show you how it’s done, bella,” Theo whispered as he tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear. Though the action was innocent, his words were far from. “I’d get on my knees and beg for a taste of you. I promise not to stop until you’re a crying, whining mess for me.” 
Desire bloomed in your core, filling your stomach with butterflies. Fuck, why was that the hottest thing anyone’s ever said to you? What were you supposed to do? Refuse? That wasn’t even a possibility at the moment. After all, you were just a weak, weak woman. 
“Okay.” 
“Okay?” Theo asked softly. 
“Yeah,” you answered confidently. “I trust you, Teddy.” 
Theo smiled and leaned forward to place a kiss on your temple. “Good girl,” he murmured. “Now lay back, I’ll make you feel so good, bella.” 
A nod was all that you could muster as you settled amongst the pillows, watching with rapt attention as Theo crawled between your legs. He kept his gaze on you as he kissed your neck, his lips soft and warm against your skin. You leaned into his touch as he licked along your collarbone, his big hands slipping underneath your bra. Theo unclasped it quickly, nosing at the straps before kissing down the valley of your breasts.
Those dead eyes came to life as he flicked his tongue over your nipples, sucking on them until they stiffened. You shuddered in response and Theo savored the tiny whimper that slipped past your lips. After showing your breasts ample attention, he continued mouthing at your torso, nipping and biting on the way down. Every sensation was heightened by the weed, your body buzzing even at the simplest touch. 
Theo parted your legs and maintained eye contact as he toyed with the tops of your knee socks. He smirked and kissed the spot right above them. “We’ll keep these on, yeah? I like when you wear these.” 
You held your breath when he bunched up your skirt, leaving filthy, open-mouthed kisses on the inside of your thighs. His breath felt cool on your core yet your entire body ignited into flames as Theo kissed you through your lace panties. 
You gasped in surprise, bucking your hips against his mouth. “Oh, fuck…” 
Theo hummed against you. “Does that feel good, principessa? I haven’t even started yet.” 
With a cocky smirk, Theo slid off your panties and groaned. You were embarrassingly wet, but he didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he relished it. Theo teased two fingers along your folds, spreading your arousal and watching as your slick soaked him. 
“Fuck, you’re so wet.” His eyes were nearly black, swallowed by lust as they flickered up to your face. “I bet you’re sweet too.” 
Theo popped his fingers into his mouth, pretty eyes rolling back as he sucked them clean. “Gods, you’re so fucking delicious. Better than I imagined.” 
You whimpered, pressing your thighs together to tamper the need. Theo shook his head before prying your legs apart and diving in. When he dragged his tongue through your folds, you writhed underneath him, eager for more. The first lick had both of you moaning. He hummed in appreciation as he hooked your legs behind his shoulders. 
He chuckled darkly, before biting softly at the flesh of your thigh. “You like that, huh, bella?” 
You panted, frowning down at him. “Stop being a tease, Teddy.” 
“As you wish.” 
His dark head disappeared between your legs, silky brown waves slipping through your fingers as you held on for dear life. Theo wasted no time in showing off his skills, poking and prodding with his tongue. You tugged at his hair as he sucked on your clit, lightly grazing his teeth against the sensitive bundle of nerves. 
Theo popped up to take a hit off the joint before passing it over to you. His slender fingers held them up to your lips before slinking down to continue eating you out. As you held the smoke in your lungs, you inhaled deeply, letting the drug that was Theodore Nott singe your veins. 
Nothing in this world could've prepared you for this moment. Theo wasn't exaggerating his skills. If anything, he underplayed just how good he was. Theo switched strategies often, starting off slow and sweet before swirling and sucking, fucking you with his tongue like he’d never get another chance to taste you again. Once in a while, he’d come up for air, smiling as you offered the joint to him. 
Mostly, Theo was focused on feasting. He made out with your pussy shamelessly, making it as sloppy and messy as he possibly could. The higher you got, the more sensitive everything felt. When Theo found a particularly sensitive spot, you arched your back and nearly scorched his sheets with the joint. 
Theo only chuckled before taking it from your hands and putting it out. “You’re on fire, bella. But I’d prefer if my sheets weren’t.” 
You smiled shyly. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to.” 
He flashed a boyish grin back. “The only thing I’m sorry about is that we didn’t do this sooner.” 
“Me too, Teddy.”
He smiled softly at you. “Sei la donna più bella che abbia mai visto.” 
Before you got the chance to ask what he said, Theo pulled you by the ankles and picked up where he left off. He made good on his promise, driving you to the brink until you were writhing and whining. Tears streaked down your cheeks as you gasped, moaning his name in the night like a prayer. It only encouraged Theo to show off even more, using a combination of his mouth and fingers. His middle and pointer finger slid inside of you easily, squelching while he worked you tirelessly. 
There wasn’t a single coherent thought in your mind as you lost yourself to pleasure. When Theo introduced a third finger and flicked his tongue on your clit, a rush of heat flooded your body. 
“Oh gods, Theo. Please. I’m so close. Fuck — ” 
“C’mon, cara mia. Cum for me.” 
Theo watched as your orgasm rocked you from the top of your head to the bottom of your feet. He lapped you up like a man starved, not wasting a single drop. You tried to fight the overstimulation by squirming away from his mouth, but Theo merely held your hips down. 
“I’m not done,” Theo warned with a growl. “Stay still, principessa. You wanted me to eat your pussy? Then be brave enough to fucking take it.” 
When he brought you to your second orgasm, you were gasping for air. You roughly tugged at Theo’s hair, eliciting a filthy moan from him. Despite this, Theo was still decidedly not done. As the third orgasm approached, you screamed before squirting and soaking right through the sheets. 
With wide eyes, Theo stared up at you. “Have you ever done that before?”
You flushed, embarrassment heating your cheeks as you shook your head. “No — I — I didn’t even know I could do that.”
Your best friend smiled, brushing your hair back gently as though he hadn’t just made you see Merlin. “Did it feel good?”
“Yes,” you admitted. “Was it okay? I mean, was that too much? Oh god, I’m sorry.”
“No,” Theo said in a stern voice as he tipped your chin up. “Don’t ever apologize. That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. I like knowing that I’m the only man that’s ever made you squirt.”
“You’re not mad?” You sniffled, lower lip trembling. “I ruined your sheets.”
“Fuck the sheets." He caressed your cheek, gazing deeply into your eyes. "It's still me. Your Teddy. There's nothing that you could do that would make me mad. You're perfect, Y/N."
Theo kissed you softly, his lips pressed firmly against yours to emphasize the words. He was your Teddy. He always would be.
"You're really good at that, by the way."
Your best friend smirked, the cocky grin tugging at his lips. "Oh yeah? I couldn't tell by the way you kept screaming my name."
You rolled your eyes. "I'm not going to compliment you if you're going to be so cocky about it."
He cocked a brow before kissing the sweet spot beneath your ear. "What are you going to do about it, principessa?"
"No fair. You play dirty, Theo."
Your best friend smiled, taking in your flushed cheeks and kiss bitten lips. In one swift move, Theo pinned you underneath him. "I'll show you just how dirty I can get, bella."
He wrapped a hand around your throat possessively and pulled you in for a kiss. You moaned into his mouth, dizzy with desire. Theo slid his tongue against yours and claimed you with a groan. 
"This — this is what it should feel like. This is what Cedric failed to do. That stupid prick should’ve worshipped the ground you walked on, but he didn’t. He missed his chance. It’s my turn now.”
Wrapping your legs around his waist, Theo squeezed your ass as he grinded his erection against your core. Even through his sweatpants, you could feel how big he was. You bucked your hips in response, rubbing against him for more friction. 
“Oh fuck, don’t do that,” Theo panted breathlessly. “I won’t be able to stop.” 
“Who said I wanted you to stop, Theo?” 
Theo cursed up a storm, a mixture of Italian and English that sounded equally hot. “I want you so fucking bad. You’re all I ever want, Y/N.” 
You smiled up at him, placing a sweet kiss on his lips. “Then have me, Teddy.” 
It was like a flip switched inside of him. Theo crashed his lips against yours, frantically tugging your skirt off as you pushed his sweatpants down. They were barely halfway off before he was lining up at your entrance. 
Theo pressed his forehead against yours. “Deep breaths, baby.” 
Though you were sufficiently warmed up, you knew it was still going to be a stretch. His tip was barely in and you were already gasping for breath.
“Theo, fuck. Oh my god.” You clawed at his back as he inched inside. “You’re so big. I can’t — “ 
“You can, principessa. I know you can. We’ll make it fit, yeah?” Theo stroked your cheek, giving you time to adjust. “So fucking tight. I can feel you stretching to take all of me. Just a little more,” he slid in further, watching your expression intently to ensure that he wasn’t hurting you. “That’s it. Good girl.” 
When Theo finally filled you to the hilt, he pressed down on your stomach, marveling at the tight fit. You whimpered in response, clenching around his cock and making him groan. 
“Can I move, principessa?” 
Tears filled your eyes, but you wiped them away and nodded bravely. “Yes.” 
To his credit, Theo went sweet and slow as you adjusted to his size. He seemed attuned to what you liked and what you didn’t like even without having to utter a word. You weren’t surprised. Theo had always known you better than you knew yourself.
It took some time, but eventually the pain subsided to give way to pleasure. You kissed Theo as he thrusted into you, feeling every delicious inch of him sliding in and out of your pussy. He was going slow for your benefit, but your impatience craved more. It turns out that when it came to Theo, you were an all or nothing kind of woman. 
“Theo, please,” you pleaded through tears. “Please, I need more. I need all of you.” 
A feral expression crossed Theo’s handsome features before he hiked your ankles over his shoulders and drove in harder. His thrusts were deep and punishing, setting your teeth on edge as he fucked you into the mattress. Theo pinned your arms above your head, watching himself slam into you again and again. 
“I love watching your pretty cunt take all of me,” he murmured, intertwining your fingers together. “You’re a fucking goddess, baby. Dea mia, I’ll worship at your altar.”
“It’s never — I’ve never felt like this with anyone else,” you admitted.
Theo softened, his tender gaze drinking you in. “It’s never felt like this with anyone else for me either, bella.” 
You pulled him down for a deep kiss, the intimacy of the act surpassing lust and physical attraction. A spark awakened within you, like finally accepting an inevitable truth. 
The thread snapped and you allowed it to wash over you like a wave, the orgasm even more intensified than the first three. Theo followed soon after, panting into your neck as he emptied himself inside of you. He whispered your name, collapsing beside you when he finished. 
The two of you lay side by side, stunned into silence. You felt breathless and boneless, not quite believing that you just had the most mind blowing sex with your best friend. 
Theo glanced over at you. You glanced back at him. The two of you burst into a fit of giggles, breaking the tension. 
“Well, fuck.” 
He rolled over on his side, tracing your lips with his thumb. “Is that good or bad, tesoro?”
“Good. Definitely good.”
Theo smiled and kissed you softly. 
“I meant what I said,“ you breathed as he pulled you to his side. “I’ve never felt like that with anyone else.” 
“I know, bella.” Theo hummed in agreement, snaking an arm possessively around your waist. “You were made for me. Just like I was made for you.” 
“You knew it would feel like that?” 
He grinned. “I had an inkling.” 
“What did I tell you about teasing me?” 
“I’m not,” he said earnestly. “I knew it would be you since the moment we met.” 
The realization from earlier reared its head as you snuggled against him. “We’ve never been just friends, have we?” 
Theo shook his head. “Not for a single second, dea mia.”
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2K notes · View notes
arcielee · 3 months
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Devotion
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Summary: You are a Targaryen princess with an infatuation on a certain White Cloak. Paring: Ser Erryk Cargyll x Targaryen!Reader Word Count: 5.7k+ Warnings: AFAB Reader, neglect, angst, unrequited love?, kissing, fingering, unprotected p in v, more angst, oral sex (m and f receiving), a mother's reprimand, lots of blood, death, more angst Author’s Note: Thank you my beloved beta reader @zaldritzosrose for looking this over and helping me this story. I Mushroom-tweaked it to fit the angsty plot. This started as an anon request and unfolded into so much more. It is dedicated to my darling @opheliax98 who encouraged "all the drama" of this piece. I hope it you enjoy it. 💜 You can also read it on ao3.
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Your mother decided that you would return to the Red Keep as an envoy, because of your ability to hide in plain sight despite the poisoned word that first followed your steps–ilībōños, bastard. It was the same that was thrown towards your half-brothers, but with a tone as bold as their brown curls and brown eyes; they did not have the fortune of their Valyrian roots to hide under, their features often speculated as too Strong. 
You, however, were the first, albeit illegitimate, born of Rhaenyra and Daemon Targaryen, conceived the same night that her virtue was called into question. 
There was a bitter speculation of your origins that faded away with your birth; you were another nameless Targaryen princess that would decorate the family tapestry, another egg that turned to stone in the crib. Life in the capitol was lonely for you; your father was away in Pentos with his new family, while your mother remained preoccupied with her White Cloak, and then her Gold Cloak and new husband. There was an age gap between you and your brothers, your nephews and your niece, and it was an isolating chasm that placed you as an outsider, a spectator, with the unfocused eyes of the court looking through you. 
Your only company was your handmaiden, Elinda, but her loyalties reported back to your mother, and then your Septa, but her complaints were ceaseless, especially as you learned the pathways that Maegor the Cruel had carved into the Keep; they became your escape from her lessons. 
It was then your mother requested a knight from the Kingsguard to watch over you, and you mourned the little bit of independence acquired, assuming you would be assigned someone old, doddy, who served as another set of eyes that would only look through you. 
You were not expecting Ser Erryk Cargyll. 
To begin, he was only three years older than you–it was said his swordsmanship so impressed the Lord Commander that he also recruited his twin brother, bringing them both to King's Landing to serve in the Kingsguard. He was handsome, standing tall behind your mother, long and lithe. His ruddy complexion brought out the blue-gray of his eyes that showed unsure, almost shy with the introductions. 
You smiled at him and his lips curled upwards in response, a rose dusting to his cheeks. 
You liked him at once.
He was devoted to your shadow, almost rapt to your beck and call. The attention fed your girlish infatuation with the young knight, and you were always teasing him in a way that teetered on the edge of his duty and his oath with your coy questions and smirk. Ser Erryk was rarely rattled by you, but seemed more amused–he would answer you with a frank tone, a welcomed honesty, that ended with your title: it was always, “Yes, princess,” or “I shall see to it, princess.” 
It continued on for months until one evening, as he escorted you to your room, you asked him to call you by your name, to set aside the formality. You saw the brilliant blue of his eyes, bright amongst the flush of his features; his tongue wet his lips, searching for his voice. “I could never do that, princess,” he started slowly, his eyes flickering up again to look at you as if for the first time. You saw the dust of his freckles that burned bright against his skin. “My purpose is to keep you safe.” 
His voice was low, so serious, and it made your blood rise to the surface. You tried to laugh it off. “My purpose is to wait around until I am able to marry the highest bidder.” It was something that weighed heavy on your heart; your eyes fell away and your fingers grasped into the fabric of your skirts. “I know I will not be missed within these walls once I am gone.” 
“That’s not true, princess.” 
It startled you, and you peered back up from underneath your lashes, your heart vibrating against your skin. You watched Ser Erryk choke on his boldness, his regret knotting into his face before he settled on silence. You watched him go, the muted ensemble of his armor as he returned to the barracks below. 
That moment created something palpable that pressed overhead. You were too young, too rash to even know how to tactfully touch the subject again. The forced return to your norm left your bones aching; Ser Erryk doted on your steps, and you rambled on to drown out the incessant screaming of your heart within your chest. 
It spilled over at Driftmark. Your family went for the Velaryon funeral procession for Daemon’s wife, feeding further into the resentment that rifted within the house of the dragon. You slipped away and found Aegon in his cups, deciding to steal some of the liquid courage. When Ser Erryk found you, your eyes were glassy and your cheeks flushed. 
He sighed, shaking his head, reaching to help you stand, but you swore you saw the hint of a smile touching his lips. Ser Erryk said nothing, but wrapped his arm around your waist and matched his gait with your staggered steps to your room. You rested your head on his shoulders, enjoyed his smell of olive oil used on his sword and how it mixed with his perspiration. 
At the door, you felt his breath tickle your ear, “I will not speak of this to the crowned princess, but you should get some rest–” 
You spun to face him, your hands pushing on his breastplate to steady yourself on your tiptoes and pressing your lips to meet with his. Ser Erryk froze with your kiss, his White Cloak tightening like a vice. His palms were rough, but he was gentle to wrap your elbows and pull you back, his gaze rooting you to cobblestone. 
Moments ticked away with your beating heart that was now bruising against your bones before he finally said, “I cannot give you what you truly deserve, princess.” 
He said nothing else and your embarrassment fed the fire in your blood. You pulled away from him and slipped into your room, careful to close your door. Your back pressed against the carvings of sea creatures into the oak and you melted to the floor, your tears spilling to ease your girlish heartache. 
Elsewhere on the island, a dragon was claimed and bloodshed followed. The walls rattled as the king proclaimed his true loyalty and it ended with you being whisked away to Dragonstone. It was for the best, you decided, to leave your broken heart behind. You felt the tinge of hope when you learned that your mother and your father were finally together, and decided to set aside your infatuation of the White Cloak, but instead focus to aid your mother, to help solidify what your grandsire, King Viserys, had proclaimed to the Seven Realms. 
That she was to be queen. 
It had been six years since you last been at King’s Landing. It was now a place both familiar and strange. The same architecture rose above, shadowing over Blackwater Bay, though inside your ancestry of Old Valyria had been replaced, the Keep becoming a shrine to the new gods who had not yet paid their dues for such a show of devotion. 
As you entered through the Barbican, you smirked at the memory of the girl you were before, only ten and five, on the cusp of womanhood that required your gowns to be stitched to fit your slender frame. Now your figure filled your dresses, your curves pressing to the seams and your hair twisted and styled to showcase the dragonblood in your veins, that shined in the amethyst of your eyes. 
The queen was first to come and greet you. The handmaidens selected were controlled by Elinda, who watched their flurry to unpack. You looked up to see her lips pursed, her dark brown eyes washed over like you were a specter coming to haunt, like she wished for the earth to swallow you whole. 
“It has been requested–” her tone was queenly, but you noted that she would not mention how it was your mother that penned her a letter, “–for you to have a knight assigned. I was advised that Ser Erryk has served this role before.” 
His name caused your blood to roar in your head as you turned to watch him enter the room. Ser Erryk seemed taller, or perhaps that was how he now held himself, his pride set on his shoulders and onto his features that sharpened. He was still sinewy, though he seemed to fill out the armor hammered to fit his frame, polished and gleaming in the sun that streaked through; it burned bright in his copper hair that was brushed back to show his beard trimmed to fit his jaw. 
The coloring brought out his blue-gray eyes that shined almost unsure, almost shy. 
It kindled something within you that you believed to be gone, a feeling that washed away on the shores of Dragonstone and swept to the depths of the bay, buried in the sand. 
Ser Erryk looked at you and you could not help your smile. His lips ticked upwards and you felt your pulse flutter anew, seizing your heart again. 
Your iron-clad shadow followed after your steps, a devotion renewed, and it returned the muscle memory of his constant and comforting presence as you reacquainted with the old castle. Ser Erryk accompanied your rounds to visit with Helaena and her children, watching your brief exchange with each prince, and even briefer with the king who smiled when he called you Rhaenyra. Your knight then escorted you back to your room without a word, just the chink of his armor with his steps, echoing off the stone. 
You paused in the doorway, looking back to see his stance. As he watched you, your mind flittered with words but none could knit together. “Sleep well, princess,” he finally spoke with a small bow, excusing himself. 
The room had also been stripped of your Targaryen history, almost unfamiliar despite your chests unpacked. Elinda and the other handmaidens helped prepare you for bed, and a cup of wine was poured but your stomach would not hold it down. They left you alone and your quarters were now a gilded cage to contain you; you pulled on your pale, silk robe and finished half of the goblet, summoning your old courage to slip away.
The same panel opened with ease, but inside, basked in the amber light of torch set in a sconce, stood Ser Erryk with his hand resting on the hilt of his sword. Your mouth fell open and he grinned at you. “I take my oath with my heart, princess,” he reminded you. 
“How did you know–?” You stammered, licking the wine from your lips. 
He only shrugged, his eyes glittering in the fire. “You seem so very different, but also are still the same.” 
You pulled the panel closed to silence his chuckle. You finished the rest of the wine poured and returned to your bed.  
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Your days at Kings Landing were idly filled. Your old Septa returned with her scrutiny of the woman you had become, her brow furrowing to find fault as you showcased your refinement of a lady mastered over the last half decade. Your afternoons were spent in the company of Helaena and her children, the only ones welcoming your return, with the littlest one, Maelor, especially taken with you. 
The time was spent in the gardens with a blanket sprawled out. Helaena would hum songs while the twins played their games. Maelor was content to sit in your lap, his eyes wide to discover whatever came within his chubby grasp. 
And Ser Erryk, your shadow, would stay close by, always. 
“He will draw his own blood to protect you.” The princess spoke suddenly, jarringly–it was a common happenstance with Helaena, you learned. Her every impertinent thought spilled off her tongue in riddles. 
Maelor’s eyes widened with his beginning grasp of the spoken word. You blew a raspberry onto his cheek to distract him, and he fell into a fit of giggles. “He would draw blood, but only if it was needed,” you corrected her, your voice low. 
Helaena only hummed in response, falling back into whatever song as she looked over the flowers that surrounded you both, watching the insects that lived amongst them. Her words remained with you, echoing in your head long after the moon began its silver stretch overhead. It guided your steps back to the panel in your room and you pushed it open. 
Ser Erryk straightened at once, his hand back on his pommel. “Princess? Why are you still–” 
You stopped him with a gentle touch on his breastplate, steadying yourself to rise on the balls of your feet until your lips pressed to his once again. But this time he responded, melting against–his lips were soft and warm, and his beard tickled your skin. 
You fell flat-footed to the floor with a smile spreading across your face; he was enraptured to watch the words that spilled from your lips. “I thought I had forgotten that night at Driftmark, but it seems what you said has embedded into my bones.” You felt light-headed, but also embolden by his gaze and the black that swallowed his murky cobalt eyes. “You once said that you could not give me what I deserved, but did you ever think you could give me what I want, what I desire?” 
It was a dam broken and he surged against you, pressing until your back touched the other side of the corridor. He reclaimed your mouth with a honeyed fervor that warmed your blood. Your fingers pull away the tie that held back his hair and combed through his silky copper spill. His fingers bruised into your hips, holding on as if you would slip away. 
You broke the kiss, breathless, your fingers knitting with his own and pulling him back into your room. It was a quiet exchange, littered with soft kisses, as you helped him remove his iron armor piece-by-piece, stacking the plates aside. 
He draped the white cape over a chair and looked to you. Underneath he wore a pale tunic and cream slacks, his outline pressing to the seams in a way that made your thighs clench. He stepped closer, his desperation more controlled, and pulled you into his chest, his thumb pressed to tilt your chin for a slow and searching kiss. 
You sighed and his tongue curled to taste, his fingers peeling away the bedtime silk that covered your skin. He worshiped every inch shown with his mouth, blooms of color decorating your skin. 
You helped him pull his shirt over his head, wanting to feel the heat of his skin, to feel the golden hair across his chest. His heart was vibrating beneath, and his arms wrapped around your waist with another kiss that pulled the air from your lungs. Ser Erryk tightened his hold to lift you and walk you backwards until you felt the edge of the bed touching the back of your knees; you sat down, your thighs plush and pink.
His hands cradled your jaw, tilting your head back to look at you. “Beautiful,” he whispered before leaning to capture your lips again. 
Your fingers curled at the nape of his neck to pull him towards you, moving back against the mattress. He followed, his skin flushed red and his eyes wide as you laid back into the pillows. He moved on top of you, gentle to touch you with soft caresses and lingering kisses, following your guide as you led his hand lower towards the intimacy between your thighs, wet and wanting. 
He trembled with his exhale as his fingertips split apart your velvet folds, his calloused touch careful to map the bloom of nerves above. You gasped with his testing touch and his smile curled into his blood stained cheeks; he moved softer, but quicker, until it elicited a sweet sigh. 
Ser Erryk was responsive, attentive to you. He was aware of your breathing and soft sounds, matching his ministration to pull something deeper within you, sparking at the base of your spine. It felt different from your own touch, this passion he pulled without your control, and you squirmed from the pressure building in your core. 
“Erryk,” you whined, your hips lifting against his hand.
He grinned, shifting to press a kiss underneath your jaw, and your skin rippled over in response to the contrast of his lips and his beard. “That’s it princess,” his husky tone was hot against your skin; your hands moved to hold him close, another pitiful mewl spilling. He shifted his hand, moving to curl two fingers within your cunt while his thumb pressed to your swollen pearl.  
“Erryk–!” you gasped, and your nails pressed red crescents into his shoulders. 
His brow was knitted with his concentration, moving to litter kisses along the column of your neck and to your collarbones–a gentle nip that bolted the length of your spine. He does not stop, his fingers coated with your slick with his rhythm that curled upwards into you, sparking a euphoria that poured white-hot into your blood, your heart bruising until you feel it rattling your bones. 
His other hand touched to return you back to your body; his palms rough but kind, following the curve of your stomach and resting to feel the rise and fall with your bated breath. You felt dizzy, blushing, and you blinked, looking down to see him watching you. He moved to give you another searing kiss that rekindled the same warmth pooling between your thighs. 
You kissed him back and spread your legs for his slender waist to slot in-between. He pulled his slacks lower, allowing the underside of his cock to spread your velvet folds, a heady but delicious pressure against your cunt. You pulled him in for a kiss and he groaned into your mouth as you canted your hips, your heart pulsing against his heavy cock. 
He was flushed. “I will be gentle, princess…”
You swallowed his words with another kiss, your legs knotting around to rut your hips against him. He panted into your mouth, his arm dipping to line himself with your entrance, and you clenched with your anticipation. 
Erryk pressed into you with a trembled control as your heat enveloped him fully. You were split apart with the most delicious fill; you mewled, pitiful, and his head fell forward, tucking into the curve of your neck. “Gods be good…” he rasped. 
Your fingers dimpled into his waist, encouraging his thrusts. His pace filled you sinfully, a slow roll of his hips that spurred a pleasure coiling within. You gasped against his chest, your nails biting into his skin as he quickened, going deeper, almost bruising. You felt your walls flutter around him, pulling another guttural groan from the back of his throat, his rasped whisper of your name buried into your hair. 
The euphony trilled your spine and you clenched with your second release. It pulled him over that precipice of pleasure, crashing like a tidal wave. Erryk melted against you, hot, pulsing deep within you, and you breathed in his skin, the same intoxicating scent mixed with olive oil and wax. 
He pulled away, the tender moment passing as duty resurfaced. 
You made a noise, pushing to sit upright and your head tilting to watch his heavy sway between his thighs as he walked back from the basin with a clean cloth in hand. Your eyes met with his and his brow arched in return, teasing; you caught his wrist and pulled him back into the bed, against your heart. 
Erryk twisted his face until it pressed into your skin, licking and kissing whatever his mouth could touch. You giggled, squirming until you could rest your head on his chest. His arms wrapped around you. 
You did not want this night to end. “Do not leave me, Erryk.” 
“I am sworn to you, princess.” He reminded you, pressing his lips to your hairline. 
It was not what you wished to hear, but it was all you would get at this moment. You hummed, burying your face until his chest hair tickled, listening to the low thrum of his heartbeat. 
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That night changed the monotony of the Red Keep. You thought of any reason to pull Erryk away from prying eyes; stolen kisses and touches that lingered, heating your skin. Your eyes now would flit to find him and see that he was always standing close, his gaze piercing through, settled onto you. 
When the sun tucked away into the horizon, he would slip through the passageway and back into your embrace, the intimate tangle of bare limbs abed with breathless kisses and secrets shared. He learned your body, an instrument to be mastered and a passion to taste you on his lips, staining his beard. He became your confidant, sharing the mutterings of the court; he was the one to warn you about the claimant for Driftmark. 
You wrote your mother at once.
It had been months since you left Dragonstone and you were excited to see her, your father and your siblings again. You were deciding on what gown to wear while Elinda was cleaning up, pulling your sheets away with a scowl on her face. 
You laughed at her expression. “What is it?”
She was perplexed. “I cannot recall your last moonsblood, princess,” she admitted, her lips pursed. “I feel that time seems to run itself together within these walls.” 
Her words ripped through you, but you said nothing, your expression as solid as the stones stacked to create the walls she referred to. Elinda finished tucking the corners before she noticed. “Princess! Are you okay–?” 
“I am fine,” you lied. “Help me with my dress.”
Underneath you were rattled, frightened with the revelation of life within you. Your disquiet settled away, disappearing once your mother arrived. You rushed to greet her, seeing her swollen with another heir in the making. Her silver brows knitted as she looked over the state of the Red Keep, and you wrapped an arm around your side, pulling you close to whisper: “It is even worse than what you described!” 
There was comfort in your mother’s arms and you pressed a kiss to her cheek. She looked at you a moment before her gaze fell back to Erryk, your ever dutiful-shadow noted. “Good ser, you have my eternal gratitude for keeping her safe.”
He was pink with her words. “Thank you, princess.” 
Her focus remained on him another moment before she looked back to you, her eyes now careful to comb over. You swallowed, unsure, and she said nothing as her attention was whisked away to her purposeful return to the Keep. 
The days that followed were tumultuous in the least, with a tension that spilled crimson on the floor of the Throne Room. Your stomach dropped from the wet sound of the two halves of Ser Vaemond hitting the stone floor, the smell of iron thick around you; Erryk moved in front of you to shield you away. 
King Viserys called for a supper that evening to mend the ever-growing rift, but instead emotions imploded, splitting the room in half. 
Erryk moved to wrap his hand around your arm at your mother’s command. Your father escorted your siblings and their betrotheds back to their rooms, his silver brow furrowing at you and your knight. 
Your footfalls echoed to keep with his pace, a numbed process of what had just happened. “I will have to return to Dragonstone,” you whispered when you felt certain it was just the two of you. “Wait for me.” 
Erryk looked at you before he stepped closer, cupping your jaw. It rooted you as he leaned to give you a chaste kiss, the warmth of his mouth searing through you. You stifled a sob when he pulled back to place another kiss to your hairline, another secret whispered against your skin. “I always have, princess.” 
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Dragonstone was gray and dreary as you remembered, becoming a beacon for awful when the news came that the king was dead and that Prince Aegon II Targaryen now sat upon the throne. 
It wrenched through your mother and her hands pressed to her abdomen. The day waned with your father plotting at the very table the Conqueror laid plans, while your mother’s screams echoed throughout. You waited in the shadows, your hands pressing to protect your stomach; you prayed fervently to the gods, the old ones and the new, but they did not answer. 
A pyre was stacked for the bloody swaddle and you watched the flames swallow it, the heat licking your skin. Your mother was pale, her eyes empty as she watched the curl of smoke rise above, her morbid farewell to her child unborn. 
It was the swords unsheathed that pulled your attention, your heart pounding at the sound of his voice: “I mean no harm, brothers.” 
You swallowed your tears, watching as Erryk kneeled to the earth with his vow renewed. The setting sun gave an amber aura that reflected off the crown he pulled from his satchel, the same as King Jaehaerys’ and your grandsire after, the same that was placed on top of your mother’s head that commanded a rippled bow of respect from everyone around. 
Back inside, any unease was settled once Princess Rhaenys spoke of how he helped her escape from the Red Keep. Your mother forced a smile, her pain still haunting her features. “Your vow is to me, and to my family. You are to keep them safe, like before, like always.” 
And he nodded. 
With war burning on the horizon, its imminent threat that would swallow the Seven Realms, there was no moment spared where you could speak of the life created. You kept it cradled to your chest when you saw how war-wearied Erryk was already. His heart had been cleaved in two and one-half remained in charge of the usurper. 
It allowed a new desperation in the passion shared, a clash of teeth and tongues to taste whatever intimacy could be spared amidst the bloodshed. This ever-threat of life so fleeting is what pushed you to be bolder, which was why you were waiting for him outside the bathhouse one evening. 
You reached as he moved past you, your fingers tucking into his waistband to pull him into the shadows. Your royal apartment had a path that weaved as an escape, and tonight you used it to bring him back with you, to allow a moment to forget the inevitable that was coming. 
“Princess…” he started, but you stopped him with a kiss. 
“I missed you,” you confessed against his lips. “I need to feel you.”
Your room was basked in candlelight and you pulled him through the passageway, turning to dip your hand below his waistband, your hand pressed on his half-hard cock. It pulsed against your palm and you moved closer to place a kiss on his neck.
He sighed his pleasure and his torment. “Princess,” he tried again, but you would not let him. 
You nipped at his skin, halting his words, and he smothered a groan while your other hand pulled at his drawstrings. “Let me,” you breathed, and his skin rose in response. 
He felt heavy in your hands that wrapped around him. You stole another kiss before your chin dropped to your chest, your spit falling from your tongue and onto his cock. 
Erryk hissed as you stroked his length, watching as he jerked with another low moan. Your hand held onto his hip to lower to your knees, your other wrapping around the base and bringing his flushed cockhead against your tongue. You pressed a kiss and were rewarded with a groan that rumbled through him; your tongue trailed the side of his cock, feeling every vein and ridge, and you placed another kiss on the underside. 
His fingers combed through your hair, watching as you pulled back to watch you take him inch-by-inch, with your hand holding onto what could not fit. His hips bucked into your mouth, bruising the back of your throat, and you groaned, a heat pooling between your thighs. 
Your mouth and hand worked in tandem, working his cock until you felt it twitch with his pearly spend, his briny taste against your tongue. He shuddered, pulling back to sink to his knees, cupping your face and pulling you close for a messy kiss. 
“My turn,” he whispered, standing and pulling you to follow, his eyes lust-blown. 
You sank into the mattress and Erryk kneeled before you, an altar to be worshiped. His palm pressed to your cunt and his fingers spread your folds, allowing his tongue to run along your slit. You shivered as he pressed further, his tongue now carving into you with a well-known intimacy that made your toes curl. 
Afterwards, Erryk curled into you and your fingers ran through his still damp hair, the occasional pause to press another kiss to his scalp. “I am sworn to you,” he was quiet, his voice barely above your heart beat. “But you are so much more to me.” 
Your heart swelled in your chest. “I know,” you kissed your knight again. “I… love you too, Erryk.” 
He hummed against you, burrowing into the softness of your skin. His words replayed in your mind, giving you the courage that you needed, but your mother already called you to her chambers the next night. 
When you entered, she dismissed Ser Lorent, who locked the door behind him. Her eyes settled on you and your throat tightened. Her face was drawn, thinner, a woman shattered by all the blood spilled and plagued by the fact that more was yet to come. 
You remained standing, waiting as her eyes poured over you. She took a breath before she said, “I already know.” 
It was a relief, it was terror. Your stomach dropped and you looked to see Elinda busying herself with whatever her hands could find. Damn her. “I wished to tell you myself,” you admitted, your fists balled at your sides until your nails pierced through to the bones. 
Her eyes steeled in return, her jaw set. “Who is he?” 
Instead, you answer with, “I love him.” 
“That was not what I asked,” she snapped in a way that both you and Elinda flinched with her words that were scalding with her anger. “Your queen asked who is the father of the child that you carry.” 
But you saw her tears were threatening to spill, her face blotched with her anger. You pressed your hands to your stomach, the new habit formed over the last few weeks. “It is Ser Erryk Cargyll.” 
She closed her eyes, a fury now thrumming. “I should have fucking known…” 
“And how is it any different from what you shared with Ser Harwin?” You could not stop your tongue, her temperament reflecting. 
“You truly wish to repeat the follies of my heart, you daft girl?” She hissed, her tears spilling. “We are on the cusp of a civil war because… I allowed my heart to choose instead committing to the duty that I am bound to by my blood, the very same within your veins.” Her hand pressed to her chest, a sob caught in her throat. “And that choice is the consequence that I now suffer every day.” 
You wanted to glare, to fight back, but you saw her torment. Her tears spilling called to you and you moved to her bedside, melting into her. She fell into your arms with sobs that wracked her body. She held onto you and you remained, allowing her grief to pour over. 
Behind, you heard the other door opening. Your mother looked up from your chest, wiping her face. “Ser Erryk?” 
A cold-fire twisted into your stomach when you saw him, knowing at once that he was not the man you were in love with. The imposter knight stepped closer, unsheathing his sword. He sounded pained. “Believe me, I had no choice.” 
“Brother!”
Over his shoulder, you saw Erryk, his sword drawn and his eyes wild. “Do not do this. I beg you.” 
There was a clash of steel, of heartbreak and betrayal. Your mother screamed at Elinda, but she remained cemented to the cobblestone, stricken with her fear. She grabbed your hand to pull you from the bed, your legs buckling and your heart screaming to stay. You followed after your mother, remembering too late that the door was locked, and you looked over the room for a weapon, an escape. 
Erryk yelled when the sword cut through his thigh. 
Your fear pulled you outside of your body to see your hands resting to shield your stomach, the smell of blood rich in the night air. You prayed to the gods, a cursed habit, and again, they ignored you. 
You blinked to focus. Arryk fell first, a sword splayed through his stomach, and you looked to Erryk, your relief fleeting when you saw the dagger buried between his ribs. He looked at you, his knees buckling, collapsing to the floor with the clatter of iron. 
Your mother ran for the door, screaming for the maesters, for anyone to come and aid. You rushed to his side, your slippers slick in the blood that was pouring out on the stone, staining the pale silk of your nightgown. You lifted his head to rest on your lap, your trembling touch unsure if you could even staunch the scarlett flow. 
“I cannot do this without you,” you pleaded, your hands pressing around the hilt; his blood bubbled between your fingers. “I need you, Erryk. Our babe needs you!”
Erryk looked at you as if you were the sun itself, a dawning realization that washed over with your words. Your heart wrenched from your chest when you looked at him, a choked sob when you saw the red that stained his smile. 
His lips parted, but no words would come. Instead you watched as the blue of his eyes faded to gray with his last breath.  
You leaned over him, your tears spilling, and you pressed a kiss to his brow, your blood-stained fingers gentle to cradle the head of your devoted knight.
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hotd masterlist || arcie's navi
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yourejinx · 9 months
Text
Late Nights
Azriel x F.Reader
Warnings: NSFW, smut, +18, minors dni. Oral, fingering, unprotected sex, p in v. A bit of fluff? I think that's it.
Author's note: I wanted to try something different, this is my first time writing content like this so please be gentle but also PLEASE FEEDBACK.
Word count: 4k
It was the fourth night in a row that you were deprived from sleep, cursed with listening Cass and Nesta fuck like rabbits in the room next to yours. In all honesty, you loved your friends and were absolutely thrilled they were enjoying and exploring the extent of their relationship, they deserved it after everything they went through. You just wished they had a little consideration for your poor ears and sleeping schedule. 
You had been working your ass off the past few weeks, Rhys had you and Az going around the courts every other day, plus you've been dealing with Eris, since you seemed to be the only member in the Inner Circle that the Autumn heir tolerated just fine. So you had your plate full, and wished for a little peace and quiet at your own home. But your friends had other plans.
Nesta let out a particularly loud moan that you clearly heard through the too thin wall. It made you grimace and you decided you had enough. Huffing, you tossed the sheets off your body, grabbed the shirt you had stolen from the shadowsinger years ago and opened the door, putting on the clothing while you made your way down the corridor. If you were awake, then Azriel had to be too, he didn't miss a thing happening in this house. 
You didn't bother knocking on his door, you were way past that line with him. Azriel was your best friend, your confident, the person who you most trusted in the entire world, and vice versa. You were too comfortable with each other to bother with politeness. You flung open the door to his bedroom, making your way inside and slamming the door behind you dramatically. The room was dark except for the dim fae light hanging on his bedside table, Azriel had put down the book he was reading to stare at you amusedly. 
"Good evening to you too." He uttered playfully.
You didn't reply, just scowled, walked up to the other side and plopped down face first on the bed beside him. He chuckled. 
"Finding it hard to sleep?" He asked, setting the book aside. 
"They are insufferable." You mumbled around the sheets. They smelled like him, an instant comfort for your tired mind. "Agh! You can hear them from here too! How are you not bothered?!?" You lift your head from his pillows to look at him exasperatedly. 
Azriel smiled somewhat apprehensive at you. "I'm kind of used to it by now." He shrugged. 
You narrowed your eyes at him, smirking. "Kinky."
He rolled his eyes feigning annoyance. "You have no idea, sweetheart." His voice was a deep purr as he smirked back at you. 
You lifted one eyebrow in amusement. There was this recurrent thing between you two, where you usually teased and flirted with each other but never dared to actually do something about it. It was just for fun right? You were friends who just liked messing around as a joke. Always dancing the line between friends and something more, it was a dangerous game for sure, but you had to admit you loved the thrill of it. 
“Is that so? Oh please, do enlighten me then.” You shot back, lying more comfortably on his bed. Arms behind your head, eyes fixed on him. 
Hazel gaze traveled all the way down to the now exposed skin of your upper thighs, your movement had caused the shirt – his shirt– to ridden up a little, revealing more of your legs and the underline of a pair of lacy black panties. His pulse spiked slightly at the sight. You didn’t seem to notice, he averted his eyes before you could catch him shamelessly staring at you.  
There was a glint in your eyes when he caught your stare again, a slight flush to your cheeks, but he didn’t back off. 
“Curious now, are we?” He tilted his head, resting his cheek on his fist to properly look at you. 
“Ah, don’t flatter yourself, pretty boy. You brought it up, are you backing out?” 
Azriel opened his mouth to respond, a playful spark dancing in his golden eyes, when—
“Fuck, Ness!” Cassian’s growl reached both your ears as clear as day. There was a beat of silence after that where you just stared at each other stunned, then you broke in a fit of laughter. 
“Seriously Az, I don’t know how you endure it, if I have to listen to them one more night I’m gonna lose my shit. I haven’t slept in days,” you sighed, rubbing your eyes. “and neither have you, it seems.” you pointed out, poking open one eye to stare at him. Azriel had laid back facing you, wings tucked behind his back, shoulders involuntarily curving inwards, a sign of tiredness. You noted the dark circles under his eyes. 
“I look that shitty, huh?” he smiled tiredly.  
“Never.” You stated matter-of-factly. “You’re always pretty.” 
It was his turn to blush then, heat rapidly crawling to his face and neck. He could handle your flirting, your teasing, but he didn’t know how to react when you blatantly called him pretty. It just sounded so…sincere, coming from you. It made his heart flutter in his chest. It was no secret that he found you attractive, he thought he made that clear, but there was more to that, wasn’t there? He didn’t just think you were hot, he thought you were beautiful, smart, and kind, and it freaked the hell out of him to acknowledge all those things because that would mean that he wanted more. More than being your friend, but it terrified him to ruin your friendship. If you wanted him in the same way, you would’ve said something by now, right? You’ve known each other for years. 
“What are you thinking about?” you whispered, breath fanning across his face. He hadn’t noticed how close you were. He could feel the heat radiating from your body. 
“I’m thinking that we should sleep.” He answered, but made no move whatsoever. You smiled at him and nodded, making to reach the faelight to turn it off. You angled your body half above him and stretched to the bedside table, hair barely grazing the hot skin of his torso. Gods, you were practically straddling him, his mind taking him to all sorts of indecent scenarios. Your breasts were just a breadths away from his mouth, he could make out the perked nipples under the shirt. He loved seeing you in his clothes, but right now he wanted nothing more than to rip the fabric out of you. Azriel swallowed dryly. 
What was his fucking problem? It wasn’t like you hadn’t shared a bed before, he blamed his friend’s heated session down the hall. He had to admit it had gotten him a bit railed up, especially with you on his bed, smelling like him. It was hard to ignore the growing want in his veins. 
“Goodnight, Az.” You said, pulling back a little to look at him through half lidded eyes, even in the dark. Was it possible you were feeling the same? or was it just tiredness in your features? 
“Goodnight, angel.” He whispered back. If you leaned in any closer, he swears he’d kiss you, consequences be damned. But you slid right back onto your side, back facing him. 
Azriel lets out a quiet, frustrating sigh, reaching an arm out to wrap around your waist pulling you close. More moaning can be heard outside his bedroom, all the way to Cassian’s room. He feels slightly jealous. 
Suddenly you snorted, “We’ll sleep better if we get past the nghs, ohh, right there Cass!” you moaned, imitating Nesta. Azriel inhaled deeply, trying to ignore the way your little whimpering had shot straight to his dick. And the bite of jealousy he felt at hearing Cassian’s name falling so sinfully from your lips.
He scented the slight change in your scent though, a pinch of sweet arousal that got him mouth-watering. It had gotten to your head too, the display of passion from your friends a few bedrooms away. Azriel debated whether it was wise to do something right now, to taste the waters maybe. But you rolled onto your back again, facing the ceiling and letting out a frustrated groan. 
“Someone has to teach them though, make them uncomfortably listen for once. Maybe I’ll go to Rita’s tomorrow, choose a random male and bring him home. Beat them at their own game.” 
“No.” Azriel growled. You turned your head to the side, looking at him and were met with the dark, lustful haze in his eyes. You felt your core pulse in response. Fuck, why was he so hot?
“What do you mean"no "?" You asked, feeling your tongue paper dry  in your mouth.
“Why wait until tomorrow, if you can beat them tonight?”
The offer hung there, unspoken, for a few heartbeats. You felt your face grow hot, felt liquid fire pooling at your belly at the mere suggestion. He hadn’t even touched you and yet he got you all hot and bothered with a few words. You licked your lips, staring at him, shirtless, hair tousled over the pillow, shadows dancing dangerously over his shoulder. As if expecting your answer. He was a sight for sore eyes. It had to be illegal to be this beautiful. 
“I’m game if you are, sweetheart.” There it was, the deep purr again that had you clenching your legs together. He noticed the shift of course, smirking smugly. 
“Haha, very funny.” you said, huffing. 
“I’m not playing.” He pulled you closer, pressing you against his front. You gasped, feeling the not so subtle bulge in his sweatpants, rubbing against the side of your thigh.
“Is this why you kept me at an arm's length tonight?” you chuckled, but he could hear the breathlessness in your voice. “So I wouldn't find out they got you all worked up?” 
“No, this isn’t their doing, angel. It's all yours.” He dared a hand down your waist, past your hips, to ghost over the skin under the hem of your shirt. You shuddered. “Tell me to stop and I will. It's okay.” 
He lifted the fabric ever so slightly, inching closer to the waistband of your underwear. 
You turned fully to him, chests pressed together, breasts dragging against the firm muscle with every breath. 
“Fuck it, let’s show them.” You breathed into his mouth before crashing your lips together in a searing kiss. 
Azriel groaned low against your mouth, grip tighter bringing your hips flushed together, and kissed you back with fervor. Your hands found purchase in the dark locks at the back of his neck, tugging gently and urging him impossibly closer. He pushed you onto your back, knees parting on their own accord to accommodate him between your legs. It was all so hot and messy. Like you both have been waiting for this for a very long time, it made you throb with need. The thought of him wanting you as much as you wanted him. 
You rolled your hips onto him, desperate for any sort of friction, moaning loudly when the clothed tip of his cock catched on your clit deliciously. Azriel took his chance to slip his tongue inside your mouth, exploring every inch and taste of you, kissing you deeply, desperately. He wanted more, he wanted everything. A wave of arousal licked down his spine, your lips were sweet and addictive, he wondered — needed to know— if other parts of you tasted as sweet. 
He kissed your jaw, your neck, biting and licking his way down to your collarbones. His right hand came to fondle with the generous swell of your breast over the shirt, pinching at the perked nub. The smell of your arousal hit him at a full force, Azriel felt like a youngling in heat rutting his cock at your core. Fuck, he couldn't help himself, he was so enamoured with the sounds he was getting out of you. 
“Take this off,” he ordered, tugging at your shirt. “If I do it I may rip the damn thing off of you, and I love seeing you in my shirt.” 
You obeyed without a second thought, too lost in the feeling of him already. He invaded all your senses, his touch sending your skin on fire, his scent sparkling pleasure bubbling in your insides. The rich tone of his voice had you feeling all tingly and sensitive. Gods, you wanted him everywhere. 
With the offensive clothing now discarded, Azriel wasted no time dipping his head down and latching his mouth to one of your nipples, swirling his tongue and grazing his teeth around the nub. His hand came to play with your other breast, giving it the same attention, switching between your tits. You arched your back into him, whining in pleasure. 
He let go of your chest, looking down to admire you, all spread out for him. Nipples hard and shiny with his spit, breathing unevenly, underwear drenched with arousal, all because of him. He felt his cock throb within the confines of his sweats. Fuck, you looked so pretty like this, he had to taste you. Azriel looked up at your face, your glazed over eyes and swollen lips, and kissed you hard. Scarred fingers found the flimsy material of your panties, pushing them aside and dragging two digits along your soaked folds; you both moaned at the feeling. He rubbed tight circles around your clit, then ran a finger through your slit, smearing your juices everywhere. Your breathing quickened and he bit down your lip before kissing his way to your heat. Azriel looked at you from between your legs, pupils blown with lust, smirking wickedly. He hooked his fingers under the waistband and tugged the material painfully slow down your legs, snarling softly at the sight of your dripping pussy. 
“Beautiful,” he moaned. “So damn beautiful.” His tongue darted out to lick a long stripe out your center. It almost knocked the air out of your lungs, your hips bucking off the bed to get closer to his face. He chuckled darkly. “Eager, angel?”
“Az please, stop teasing,”  you whined prettily, eyes locking with his. 
At this point you didn’t care if your friends could hear or not, you wanted Azriel’s mouth on you, his fingers, his cock. You wanted to feel all of him. 
“Whatever my sweet angel wants,” he blew some air into your cunt, making you shiver in anticipation. Azriel dive in, devouring you like a male starved, like he might die if he didn’t get to taste you. He all but full on made out with your pussy, dragging his tongue along your folds, wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking sharply. He groaned at your taste, the reverberations causing your eyes to roll back into your head, hips jerking up. He wrapped one arm around your hips to keep you pin to the bed and switched between harsh sucks and flicking the wet muscle around the nub. The pleasure was all too much and not enough at the same time, you moaned his name aloud and tugged at the strands of his hair again. 
Azriel’s free hand reached down to spread your folds, soaking his digits in your arousal before proding one finger at your entrance, and pushing inside. Your walls immediately clenched around him, making you both growl in pleasure. 
“Fuck, sweetheart, so tight. Already clenching on me,” he moaned, teeth grazing your clit. You could feel the pressure building in your lower belly, walls clamping down on his finger when he added a second one. You cried out, desperately trying to ride his face. Azriel pumped his fingers inside of you faster, curling his digits to reach that sweet spot that had you seeing stars behind your lids. Words were beginning to fail you, mumbling incoherently about how close you were. “You wanna cum? C’mon angel, give it to me, cum all over my face and fingers.”
His words had an immediate effect on you, pushing you over the edge. Pleasure overpowered you and you let go, cumming hard on his fingers, moaning his name for all the house to hear. Azriel kept thrusting his fingers into your hole, guiding you through your orgasm and licking every last drop you had to offer. He watched you closely, eyes shut in pleasure, soft pants leaving your plush lips as you came down from your high. Only then he pulled his hand away, mesmerized by you. He crawled up your body, coming face to face with you. 
“Hey,” he whispered, smiling. 
“Hey,” you replied, face flushed and smiling satisfied. You reached your hand to push away the dark strands that had fallen into his face, cupping his cheek in your palm. He looked absolutely gorgeous, hair disheveled from your tugging, lips bruised and shiny with your juices, gaze clouded with lust and something else. More intense even, more deep. 
You dragged your thumb over his bottom lip and he sucked it into his mouth, you almost whined again. Breaths coming in short. You brought his face to yours, kissing him with such devotion you couldn't hold back any longer. Azriel shuddered, leisurely kissing you back, you could taste yourself on his tongue. Moaning softly, you ranked your nails down his body, from his pecs, to the hard planes of his abdomen, all the way to his cock, palming him through the fabric. He hissed when you slid your fingers past the waistband of his pants, gripping him in your hand. His hips buckled. He was big, and warm and sticky with pre-cum. You made to put his sweatpants down but he stopped you before you could take it any further. 
“Fuck baby, are you sure?” he asked, looking intently at you. A swirl of emotions passed through his eyes, it made your heart flutter in your chest. “We don't have to, unless that's what you want. I think we made our point clear.” He laughed breathlessly. 
“It is what I want Az. I want you, I need you. Please.” You watched him with pleading eyes, full of trust and… He didn't dare acknowledge that emotion yet, not unless you spoke it out loud. Although his heart still gave a flip. Pulse picking up. 
He helped you pull his pants down, and kicked them out of his legs. His cock sprung free, slapping against his abs, tip swollen and dripping. You flashed him the most beautiful smile he had ever seen you wear, dragging your eyes shamelessly through his body. It gave him a little bit of an ego boost. 
“You're so pretty Az. So so pretty,” you murmured, eyes half lidded already devouring him. 
There it was again, you calling him pretty. He didn't know what to do with himself so he leaned in to capture your mouth in a scorching kiss. You wrapped your legs around his hips, pulling him flush against you, both hissing when the tip of his proud cock bumped against your clit. 
You broke the kiss to slide your mouth along his jaw, down his neck, peppering his sun-kissed skin in love bites. Marking him as yours. Azriel groaned and thrust his hips forward, sliding through your folds, coating his length in your arousal. He repeated the action a couple of times before aligning himself with your entrance. He pushed in slowly, inch by inch, your wetness and the remnants of your orgasm making it easy to slide all the way in. Your walls hugged him tightly as he bottomed out, stilling, to give you time to adjust to his size. Azriel let out a moan so hot and sinful it made a new wave of arousal wash over you. 
He felt on cloud nine, his head falling to the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent and letting it intoxicate him. He could’ve cum right then and there, buried to the hilt in your heat. But he wanted it to last, taking his time to savor the feeling of you wrapped around him so perfectly. He had no doubt in his lust filled mind that you were made for him. You were his and only his. 
You rolled your hips at last, running your fingers down his sides urging him to move. That was all it took for him to pull out to the tip and slam his hips hard into yours, Azriel set a slow, sensual pace, intended in making you feel every last inch of him. You welcomed the stretch with a wanton moan, feeling the veins with every delicious drag of his cock against your walls. 
“Gods, Azriel, more!” you whined. “I can take it.” 
“I swear you're gonna be the death of me, sweetheart.” He panted. Pulling out he gripped your hips tightly and turned you onto your stomach, ass up in the air. He thrust in harsher, making you cry out in pleasure. All signs of restraint gone. 
Azriel picked up speed, angling his hips just fine so that he could reach even deeper inside you. He quickly found the spot that had you gripping him tight, eyes rolling to the back of your head. Abusing your hole, hitting your g spot every single time, mercilessly. He had you in a state of pure bliss, bringing one arm to wrap around your middle, reaching between your legs to play with your clit. You were so close, already too sensitive from your previous orgasm. Squirming around in his embrace, pushing your ass back to meet his thrusts. 
“Fuuck! Don't stop,” you managed out, fisting at the sheets for support. 
“I won't,” he grunted, the swollen head of his cock kissing your cervix. “You're mine, do you understand me? Mine. No other male gets to touch you.” 
“Yes, yes I'm yours,” you panted,  desperately wanting to please him. 
“Good girl.” 
He was relentless, hips slapping with a force that had the headboard smashing against the wall. He knew you were about to cum, could feel his own orgasm sneaking up on him. Azriel went impossibly faster, pulling sobs out of you. You clamped down on him after one particular sharp thrust and your high barreled through you without previous warning. You screamed, white hot pleasure blinding you. Cum gushed out of you, making a mess of your thighs and his. He held your trembling body up, pressed to him as he fucked you through your orgasm, thrusts becoming sloppier by the second. His wings flared proud behind him and he felt the tight knot in his gut snap. Azriel came with a growl of your name, hips coming to a stop. Your body falling limp atop the bed. 
Slowly pulling out of you, he watched astonished at the mess you made, both of your juices dripping down your legs. When his breathing became even again, Azriel leaned in to press a kiss to your spine, making you shudder. 
“You okay, angel?” He asked, scarred fingers gently pushing your hair out of your face. 
You smiled tiredly at him, content. “I feel amazing.” 
He chuckled and laid back next to you, pulling you to lay on his chest. You pressed a kiss over his heart, arms resting on his stomach, still catching your breath. No one spoke for a while, enjoying the aftermath of your actions. There was no room for worry, not with Azriel. Not ever. 
He traced iddle circles on your skin, loving how well you fit next to him. 
“Az?” You called softly to him, he hummed in acknowledgement. “Do you hear that?” 
He stilled, straining his hearing. Muffled moans could be heard down the hall and the distinct sound of a headboard smashing hard against the wall. You laughed in unison. 
“I think we may have spurred them on,” he said amusedly, voice hoarse. 
“I've never been more glad to have left my room than right now” you chuckled. 
“You and I both, angel.” He added, squeezing your ass. 
You turned to him, placing a kiss to the outline of his jaw. Silently admiring the hickies you left on his neck. 
“How does a second round sound?” You purred. 
He smirked, cock already hardening. “Absolutely delightful.” 
2K notes · View notes
chilling-seavey · 2 months
Text
Dreamland (ln4) - Part Five
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↳ A/N This part is so dang long it had to be broken into two. Whoops. But I'm also super pumped about who we (and Lando!!) are going to meet in the next two parts! Strap in, though. It's not going to be smooth sailing.
↳ Inspired By: 'Grapejuice' by Harry Styles
↳ Summary: George and Alex visit Lando in Monaco for a week that summer. Their visit seems to align perfectly well with the week where yours and Lando's situationship is tested the most
↳ Pairings: Fanboy Lando Norris x Famous!Author!Fem!Reader (NO use of y/n), University Student Lando x Internet Friend George x Internet Friend Alex
↳ Word Count: 20.6k
↳ Warnings: 18+, NSFW, angst and less than ideal ways of solving problems, talks of virginity, hints of dom/sub dynamics and possessiveness, name calling/degradation, spanking, spitting, borderline exhibitionism, oral sex (m & receiving), cumplay, [kinda rough] unprotected sex.
PART FOUR || PART SIX
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You had insisted that he go by himself. In all honesty, there should have been no reason why Lando was nervous but there was something so menacing about the Nice airport in mid afternoon on Friday that didn’t help to ease his anxieties over finally meeting his two internet friends after nearly years of talking. He didn’t put up much of a fight when he asked you to come and you said he would be just fine on his own - he didn’t want to look like a baby in front of you - but as he stood in the arrivals gate with his heartbeat in his ears, he was slightly regretting not pleading with you just a little bit more. 
Lando, George, and Alex knew each other better than anyone else in the world, it was just unfortunate that they lived in different parts of the country and therefore could never see each other in person. Thanks to you, that was going to change. At least for a week. With Lando living in Monaco for the summer and working alongside you and your team at your publishing company, you had arranged for his two closest friends to fly down to spend a week with him. It was yet another reminder that your relationship was something more than just something casual. A title yet to be determined between you, Lando was just happy that he was able to live out his dream of having something with you. 
Lando had probably paced the arrival gate a few times over since arriving at the airport that afternoon, trying to calm himself down in this uncharted territory. He was an avid overthinker and worried if his friends would think he was boring in person or weird or if they would find someone better in the sparkling city of Monte Carlo and drop him. Lando tried to breathe. On the outside, to onlookers, he looked simply neutral. On the inside, he was completely panicking.  
The large screen above the arrival doors indicated that the flight from Norwich International Airport had landed. 
George had arrived first. 
The moment he emerged through the arrival gates, Lando was straightening up in the crowd, his mind whirling as George scanned the faces of strangers to find him. Working up his courage, Lando raised his hand up and when George caught his gaze, he smiled widely and started over towards him. Lando bit back his grin as excitement grew in his chest to offset the nervousness that was still lingering in the pit of his stomach. 
“Lando!” George greeted happily with a handsome smile and reached out a hand as they approached. 
Lando took his hand and they both went in for a smooth one armed hug and a pat to each other’s backs before stepping away again. There was a moment's pause as they just stared at each other with content smiles and their slightly awkward silence had them sharing little chuckles. 
“This is unreal, mate.” George said with a heavy sigh, “Wow.”
“Yeah.” Lando shuffled his weight in front of him, “Monaco of all places.”
“I know!” George reached out to nudge his arm, “Who’d have thought it, huh?”
“I mean…I dreamt it.” Lando mumbled. 
“I guess manifesting works.”
“Guess so.” Lando smiled lightly. 
There was another pause. 
“How was your flight?” Lando asked casually, trying to make conversation until the last of their trio would arrive. 
George shrugged, “It was good. Were you waiting here long?”
“Not really. Maybe twenty minutes.” Lando assured him. 
George checked the time on his phone, “And when’s Alex landing?”
“Maybe forty-five?” 
“Perfect. Enough time for a coffee run.” George hoisted the straps of his backpack up his shoulders and adjusted his Tommy Hilfiger jacket - that he spent an entire paycheque on last year - as he scanned the busy airport, “Which way?”
“Uhm,” Lando looked both directions before pointing in the way of the cafés, “that way, I think.” 
“Great. Lead the way…and tell me all about your lady.”
“You already know everything.” Lando chuckled as they started off down the bustling airport hallways, “We text literally every day.” 
“Yeah, but I wanna hear it all in person.” 
Right on time, forty-five minutes later, the arrivals screen announced that the flight from Heathrow International Airport had landed. 
Alex had arrived.
George still had his coffee in hand - half finished - and Lando had his hands stuffed in his pockets. He didn’t get anything from the café mainly because he still felt like throwing up from nervousness but he played it off that he had a big lunch when George asked if he could buy him anything. Their conversation had flowed pretty well as Lando grew more confident being face to face with someone he had only ever talked to through a screen but with Alex’s impending arrival, his slight anxieties were back. 
When the final member of their trio stepped through the arrival gates, George wasn’t even hesitating a minute before waving to him. 
Spotting him easily, Alex grinned ear to ear and raised one hand up in return, calling across the crowd excitedly, “My boys!” 
The three hurried to meet up and excited hugs were shared over jackets and backpacks, standing beside suitcases and within the depths of the crowd. Alex had a way of making everything feel a little lighter - a little easier - and Lando found his nervousness melting away faster than before since familiarizing himself with George and now being completed by Alex’s arrival. 
Standing in a little triangle, Lando frowned, looking between Alex and George with a playful scowl, “My God, I never thought of myself as that short but why am I the shortest right now?” 
Alex laughed and George just smiled, offering him a reassuring, “You’re not that much shorter than us.” 
“Are you kidding? I look like your kid.” Lando tutted. 
“I’m also the oldest so it makes sense that I’m the tallest.” Alex countered, giving him a nudge too. 
“Oh, older than me by, like, barely two years.” George scoffed. “Besides, is age Lando’s excuse then? He’s the baby of the group after all.”
Both George and Alex looked at him and Lando opened his mouth to say something but his words failed him and he simply held his hand over his face with a shy laugh. 
“The youngest out of the three of us and the only one who’s not a virgin.” George pressed teasingly, “How’s that fair?”
“Oh my gosh!” Lando blushed, hurriedly giving George’s shoulder a shove as his two friends snickered between themselves. 
“You’re so shy in person.” Alex pointed out, slinging an arm around Lando’s shoulders, “You’ve literally sent us a picture of your scratched up back and detailed descriptions of how you fuck the girl of your dreams and here you are barely being able to word a ‘hello’ without blushing.”
“Okay,” Lando dipped out from under his arm bashfully, “No need to be bullying me like this.”
“Hey, you’re like…our youngest triplet brother. It’s only fair we get to bully you a little.” Alex said. 
“And it’s hardly bullying.” George added. 
Lando pointed an accusatory finger at the both of them, “You be nice to me or I’ll have my wealthy and insanely successful and attractive woman ship you back home.”
“Oh, oh, oh!” his friends laughed teasingly and the three guys shared cheeky smiles and playful tugs to each other’s sweaters. 
“There he is!” George patted Lando’s shoulder, “That’s the Lando we know.” 
Lando just laughed and shoved his hand away, “Come on. The car is waiting outside.”
“Monaco, baby, let’s go!” Alex clapped once and then rubbed his palms together and the three of them grabbed any and all bags and suitcases and headed towards the exit of the airport, ready to face the sunshine and their week ahead. 
George and Alex wouldn’t shut up about the black SUV that picked them up from the airport and took them to the hotel. Just as Lando had only a month or two before, they were just as thrilled about the mini fridge inside and the sleek leather seats that deserved nothing less than absolute gushing reviews. A personal driver to their multi-star hotel. The full Monte Carlo experience. 
“You got yourself a real sugar mama, Lan.” Alex tisked through his proud smile as they stepped out of the car and onto the pavement at the front doors of the luxury hotel. 
Landscaped with palm trees and coloured flowers, the hotel was in the heart of Monte Carlo and was sculpted as one would imagine a modest five-star hotel to be. In the late afternoon, the flood lights streaked up the front pillars and lined the pathway towards the sliding glass doors into the lobby. The driver started to take their suitcases from the trunk. 
“Hardly a sugar mama.” Lando snorted. 
“I mean, she is giving you sugar after all.” George smirked over at Alex. 
“She is?” Lando scoffed, “Please. I’m the one giving it to her.”
His friends burst into laughter at his smooth response and the driver - already half sick of their rambunctiousness as twenty-something-year-old boys - set their suitcases with them and closed the trunk. They called their thanks as he returned to the driver's seat and drove off, leaving them to their own devices. 
Lando led the way into the hotel and past the two-storey entryway and curling staircase towards the elevators and his friends followed eagerly, already talking his ear off with questions they wanted to hear to answers to in person that they didn’t have a chance to ask in the super cool car. 
“So how often do you actually stay in the hotel?” George pressed as they all piled into the elevator and Lando hit the button for the eighth floor. 
“Maybe half the time.” Lando shrugged proudly as the doors slid closed. 
“My boy!” Alex shook his shoulder from his other side. 
“Although we can’t really go out properly because it’s Monaco and I’m supposed to just be some interning fan at the company…kinda just feels like half-strangers with benefits but…”
His friends looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to continue.
Lando broke into a grin, “The benefits are so good.”
“How often a week?” Alex pried. “Come on. We gotta live vicariously through you!”
Lando smiled bashfully to the elevator numbers that approached eight. He shrugged, playing it cool, “Maybe five times a week? Sometimes more if we can go a second round.” 
“Jesus.” George groaned, running his hands over his face. 
On Lando’s other side, Alex was merely gaping and he shook his head, “Unbelievable.” 
“Although,” Lando countered just as the elevator reached their floor and the doors slid open, “we’re mostly using condoms now which fucking sucks.”
The two middle aged women who were waiting for the elevator on the same floor gave him a weird look as they so clearly heard what he said as their groups passed each other. Lando went red and nearly rushed down the hallway in embarrassment as Alex and George roared with laughter and hurried after him. 
“Have you told her about your little breeding kink?” George teased as Lando unlocked the room door. 
“No.” Lando hushed him quickly. “It’s not something she’d be into…not right now. She’s so busy with work and writing her fifth novel…she’d probably be completely turned off of even the idea of a baby right now. I don’t want to weird her out or make her uncomfortable.” 
Alex and George exchanged little changes behind his back and then followed him into the hotel room. The afternoon sun warmed the patterned carpet and pristinely made white linen sheets over the two queen beds, guiding them farther into the room and past Lando’s suitcase that was tucked empty in the corner as he had his belongings packed away in drawers and the closet. He was to be staying there all summer and living out of a suitcase would not be ideal. 
“Dibs on sharing with George.” Alex dropped his backpack onto the bed closest to the window, “I don’t wanna sleep in a bed that Lando probably fucked in.”
“Hey!” Lando glared over at him and George just laughed, “First of all, the sheets are cleaned every day. And secondly, we do it at her house, not here. Thank you very much.”
“Oh, right.” George piped up, flopping backwards onto the bed that Alex claimed for the both of them and he tucked his hands behind his head, “Then say that we don’t want to sleep in a bed that you probably wanked in.” 
“You guys are fucking disgusting. Have you always been this gross over message?” Lando rolled his eyes.
“Hey, you made us this way.” George argued. 
“You corrupted us.” Alex added.
“With all your filthy fantasies about this author girl you were drooling over.” George finished. 
“We have the receipts if you need proof.” Alex offered. 
Lando shuttered lightly despite his light chuckle, “No thanks. They’re probably so cringey.” 
Alex unzipped his backpack and took his headphones from around his neck to tuck away, “Too good for our thirsting hours now that you got the girl, Lan?”
“Never.” Lando chuckled with a shake of his head and he sat himself on the end of his own bed. 
George was texting away in his own world and when a silence settled, both Lando and Alex looked over at him expectantly. A few seconds later, George felt their staring and looked up, glancing between them. 
“What? I’m just texting my mum that I arrived.”
“Shit!” Alex pulled his phone from his pocket, “I need to do that too.”
Lando sat on the end of his own bed and rested his hands behind him, smirking proudly over at his friends, “Imagine having overprotective parents? Couldn’t be me. I’m living alone in Monaco…on my own schedule…”
Alex snorted without looking up from his text messages, “Yeah, okay. Says the twenty-one-year-old who got grounded a week before he left because he didn’t take out the trash.”
George chuckled from behind his phone. 
“Wow. Lot of smart talk today coming from a virgin.” Lando clapped back. 
“Oh shit!” George laughed. 
Alex gaped over at Lando who just smirked sweetly and peaked a brow at him. 
“That’s cold, mate. That’s cold.” Alex shook his head, although they all knew it was just in good fun. 
“Hey, I dunno about you, Albono, but I plan on losing mine while on this trip.” George said proudly and tucked his hands behind his head. 
“Not in our shared bed, you’re not.” Alex sassed. 
“It’ll be like we’re all roommates in college!” George laughed, “We’ll put a sock on the door when one of us has a girl over.” 
Lando answered quickly, “Speak for yourself. I have a million dollar penthouse to escape to when I need privacy away from you two old men.” 
Alex shook his head, “Are we really just going to bully each other this entire week?”
“Maybe. It’s kinda our brand.” George chuckled. 
There was a pause and at that moment, Lando’s phone buzzed in his pocket. He casually took it out to see who was calling, expecting his mother, but your name instead was across the screen, paired with your contact photo of a picture Charles had taken of you on one of the days your little work group went out for lunch. You didn’t have many private pictures just the two of you for extra privacy’s sake but Lando was okay with that - the real thing was much better than photos. 
The sight of your incoming call had him jumping up from the end of the bed in surprise, gasping before alerting his friends, “It’s her! Everyone shut up!”
Alex looked over at George and they shared amused little expressions before Alex snorted quietly, “We weren’t even saying anything but okay.”
Lando answered the call and raised his phone to his ear, keeping his wide wondering eyes on his friends as they would witness their first real-life interaction between the two of you, “Hey.”
“Hey, you.” you greeted through the phone. “Just called to check in and make sure George and Alex got there okay and the driver was good for you.”
“Yeah, the car was great.” Lando answered, slightly off topic, earning a thumbs up from both of his best friends, “And we all just got to the room now.”
“Good. I gotta admit it’s a little lonely at work without you…”
“Really?” Lando answered proudly, “Do you miss me?”
“Of course. You’re coming in on Monday, right?”
George and Alex exchanged smirks that had Lando holding his hand up to them as if to get them to stop distracting him. 
“Monday. Yeah.” Lando answered. 
Then his friends started with the kissing faces, mocking him annoyingly with ridiculous sound effects, and Lando turned away from them to try and focus on what you were saying. 
“And are we still thinking lunch tomorrow?” you asked. 
“Yeah. That’d be great.” 
From behind him, Alex and George were snickering together and it made Lando nervous again, feeling so watched even if it were only by his best friends. He didn’t want them to embarrass him in front of you. 
“Good. I’ll text you the details and you can let me know if that fits into your touristy schedule, okay?”
“Yeah…that…” Lando glanced back at his smirking friends. “That’s good.”
“Okay.” you could tell he was distracted so you wrapped up, “And the room is on my card so you guys can order room service or something if you want.”
“Oh…are you sure?”
“Yeah! You guys have fun. I can’t always have you to myself.”
“I don’t mind when you have me to yourself.”
Your sweet laugh through the phone had him grinning adoringly and you told him honestly, “I’ll see you tomorrow, lover.”
“See you tomorrow, baby.” 
Lando hung up and took a second to stare at your contact picture with a bashful grin, almost half forgetting that his friends were even there for a second. He was all too enamoured by you. 
Suddenly, Alex’s mocking had him startling back to reality, “See you tomorrow, baby.”
George joined in with a, “I love you so much I want you to have my children.”
Lando turned around to face them again but he was grinning nonetheless, shushing them modestly, “Okay, okay.”
His friends laughed teasingly and Lando drifted over to the desk across the room to grab the leather covered menu.
“So she said we can order room service if we want.”
“Oo.” George jumped up from the bed and came over to join him, peering over his shoulder at the menu. “Let’s order steak!”
Alex took to Lando’s other side, “Or caviar!” 
“Do you even like caviar?” George retorted. 
Alex shrugged back, “There's a first time for everything.”
“Okay…how about, like, chips?” Lando pitched, “I seriously don’t want to max out her credit card.”
“Burgers then?” Alex offered, pointing it out on the menu in Lando’s hand. 
The other two agreed. 
“Burgers and chips all around.” Lando reached for the chorded hotel room phone. 
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The next morning was Saturday and between jet-lag and excitement, the three guys were up before 8am. The hotel served breakfast and by 9am, they had eaten, been dressed, and were waiting outside for their Uber to get their adventures started. Lando had already been familiar with most of Monaco since he had lived there for a few months at that point so he was excited to be acting tour guide for his friends. 
He had planned a whole day - definitely not earlier that week at his desk when he was supposed to be doing real work - and had their destinations written in his phone, leaving a section free for lunch where you would meet them to take the three of them out. Most of their morning was spent around the Monaco Grand Prix routes - dreaming about their motorsports lives that could have been - and touring nearby locations of stars, artsy stores, and any locations that caught their interest along the way. Alex and George stocked up on Monte Carlo merch and George even blew a good chunk of his money on a pair of genuine Hermes loafers that he wore proudly through the square outside the Casino. 
When noon came around, it was time for them to meet you at the restaurant where you would be waiting. As Lando led the way - with some help from his phone maps - he found himself growing nervous again. So nervous in fact that he kept taking wrong turns until they ended up a few minutes late. Alex and George didn’t speak to it though because it was clear that their best friend was turning into his usual shy over-thinking self and they didn’t want to embarrass him further - especially not in front of you. Their friendship might have thrived on lighthearted banter, but they knew their limits. 
You were waiting outside the restaurant when they walked up, your car parked on the street with the parking meter already running and you were leaning against the passenger side door. Lando broke into a grin at the sight of you and you pushed yourself off your car with a smile that matched his own once you saw him approaching. George and Alex - only slightly starstruck at the reality check that was the fact that you were really truly there - followed slowly behind Lando as he hurried over to you. 
“Hey, you.” you held your arms out and Lando slid right in for a close hug. 
“Hey, yourself.” he smiled, holding onto you just a second longer than necessary. You didn’t mind. 
Lando shifted to stand right at your side as he introduced you to his friends, starting with Alex who had to shift his bags of Monaco merch into the other hand so he could shake yours. When Lando went to introduce George, he was simply gaping at your car. 
“Quit staring, GR.” Alex elbowed him teasingly, “It’s rude.” 
“Sorry, sorry.” George held out his hand to you just as Alex had, slightly nervous himself to know if he should go in for a hug and especially under Lando’s watchful eye from your side. He looked back at your car and let his eyes scan it greedily, “This is yours?”
“Yep.” you reached back to pat the roof.
“Jesus.” George breathed. “Mercedes-AMG…C 63 S…the silver. Shit, this is literally my dream car.” 
“Keep your tongue in your mouth, dude.” Alex snorted. 
You laughed lightly and Lando watched you carefully as you stared at George’s obvious drooling over your shiny silver car. He just wanted to touch you so badly…to wrap his arm around your waist and pull you in and nuzzle into your neck…so he stuffed his hands in his pockets instead. 
Proudly, you unlocked your car and opened the passenger door so George could look inside and you pointed out all the cool little features that had him completely fangirling over it. You kept it so perfectly clean that it was almost as pristine as new and George was almost afraid to touch any of it. Lando and Alex, waiting on the sidewalk with you and George both leaning inside your car, exchanged little expressions of half-amusement and half-concern. 
But Alex ended up smiling and nudged Lando’s arm as he mouthed with a whisper, “She’s real.”
“Yeah?” Lando whispered back with a surprised expression like anyone wouldn’t believe him. 
“It’s a little crazy…surreal?” Alex shrugged. 
Lando looked back at you and tried not to stare at the curve of your ass in your jeans as you bent over into the front of your car. He tilted his head to the side habitually and licked away his shy smile, “Yeah.”
“Okay,” you stood back up with a laugh and when George returned to Alex’s side with a blissed out smile, you closed the door again and locked the car, “shall we head in?”
“Thanks for that.” George took to your other side as Alex led the way into the restaurant. “I’ve only ever been able to see those cars online…never in person.” 
George was only being friendly but Lando caught himself dusting his hand over the small of your back almost protectively as you all entered and made your way towards the host stand for your reservation. You let his hand linger there for a few seconds, thinking he was just being polite, but when he didn’t move it, you looked back at him. 
“Okay?” you asked. 
He smiled tightly, “Yeah.”
You discreetly guided his hand away from your waist and then took the lead of your little group towards your table. Lando stayed close behind you and when the host set your menus down and then left, he was jumping into the booth seat beside you. 
“Dibs on sitting here.” he said with a little nervous sing-song to his voice. 
George and Alex sat on the opposite side of the table from the two of you and as you smiled down to your menu at Lando’s claim, his friends just snorted and shook their heads. 
Alex tisked, “No one was going to fight you on that, mate.”
Lando’s cheeks flushed pink and he hid behind his menu so no one would call him out. 
Under the table, you set a reassuring hand on his thigh and he reached down to tuck his fingers around yours, giving your hand a squeeze. No one noticed. You both pulled away again and continued skimming your menus without so much as a glance towards each other. It was almost as if you were too comfortable sneaking around. 
The waiter came by not long later and introduced himself and pitched the offer of drink orders. George and Alex ordered soda’s and Lando gestured to you to order first. 
“A bottle of red, please. Do you have Cabernet?”
“Yes. Glasses for the table?” the waiter asked. 
You glanced across to the other two who shrugged dumbly, having never had wine before. 
You smiled back to the waiter, “Yes, four glasses, just in case. Thank you.” 
“Since when do you drink wine, Lan?” Alex asked once the waiter had disappeared. 
Lando shrugged with a bashful smile, “Since a few months ago when I took this woman out for dinner and we shared a glass.” 
You nudged his shoulder with yours playfully and you shared little grins. 
“I guess it’s kind of our thing now, huh?” you said. 
Lando’s eyes dropped to your lips for a brief second before he was meeting your gaze again and answering coolly, “Yep.”
Oh how he craved to kiss you. 
The waiter returned not long after with your drinks and he poured all four of you a glass before setting the bottle on the table. With food orders placed, your little group was permitted some time to chat before it would be time to eat. 
You asked George and Alex about their college careers and where they have been since graduation. Alex spoke to his degree and how he had worked part time at a cat café in London but was still at home with his parents, making sure to spin it like it was a choice rather than a necessity. George took his turn next to explain his degree and goals, how he really wanted to try his hand at motosports but his parents never had the funds to put him into it growing up. 
Lando sipped his wine and paid close attention to your expression, how obviously interested you were in everything that they were saying, and he couldn’t help but see similarities in your face from the way you looked at him on the first day you met. He was overthinking again. Between your connection with George over your car to your pitch in conversation with Alex about your favourite animals, Lando was squirming for a conversation switch. 
Lando set his glass down and cleared his throat nervously. You glanced over at him and nudged him gently with your elbow, urging him to look back at you. Sitting side by side, you were quite close, and although neither of you made any sort of romance-infused move, your closeness and your eye contact still had Alex and George keeping extra watch. 
“So,” you started, setting a dramatic hand on Lando’s knee under the table, “I don’t think you have ever told me about how you three started talking.” 
“Oh, really!” Alex’s eyebrows raised and the two best friends looked over at Lando with amusement. 
“Did you not?” George pressed, his tone just as infused with teasing as Alex’s. 
Lando turned his head away from you to look to the table top with a blushing smile, “Guess not.”
“Oh no.” you giggled, “I made him shy. This must mean it’s a good story.”
“You wanna tell, Lan?” Alex offered. 
Lando contemplated the offer and realizing that it could have been a perfect opportunity for his best friends to exaggerate and make him sound terribly creepy, he took it upon himself, “Well…I had this little…pointless…not a big deal blog a couple years ago.”
Alex corrected him smoothly, “Two years ago.” 
“And,” Lando pressed on, “on this blog I reposted your Instagram pictures and stuff and wrote little reviews about your novels and little journal entries and stupid stuff like that.” 
“Aw,” you grinned and leaned into him for a moment, “That’s so cute. Like a true little fanboy.” 
“Yeah and these two were my most avid followers so don’t blame it all on me.” Lando nodded to the two across the table. 
“So they were fans of you being a fan of me.” you teased. 
“Hey!” Alex and George laughed. 
“No way were we fans of Lando.” George tisked. 
“Yeah, that guy sucks.” Alex gave a thumbs down to the table.
“Okay, fuck you.” Lando chuckled bashfully. 
“I dunno,” you pitched, “I think he’s pretty great to be honest.” 
George hummed, “I think you might be a little biased.”
Lando’s wide eyed glare and a stiff warning shake of his head had his friends shutting right up.
“Why biased?” you pried, ready to stir the pot and see what they had to say. Lando tried to read your expression but he couldn’t, torn between whether you were teasing them or genuinely concerned. He had never confessed to you just how much he shared with his best friends regarding your little strange relationship. 
“Uhm,” George tried to get himself back out of the hole he dug, “because…you know…”
“He’s your intern…and stuff…” Alex jumped in. 
You licked away your little smirk and you nodded, “I see.”
“Yep.” George nodded too. 
Lando held his breath. 
“No other reason?” you tried. 
George and Alex looked at Lando’s stricken expression and then back to you. They both shrugged. 
“Oh, come on.” you tisked, “I know that you know. I’m not dumb.”
There was an array of relieved sighs from around the table. 
You gaped at them, “What did you think I was going to do? Ship you all home? Like, damn, if I can tell my best friends all the tea, I think you guys should be able to know too.” 
“I dunno, we never talked about it.” Lando shrugged, slightly defensively. 
You bumped his shoulder again with a smile, “You’re lucky you’re cute.” 
“Says you.” Lando bumped you back. 
You turned back to his friends, “Did he say I was good?”
Lando spoke your name in exclaimed surprise at your blunt question but his friends just laughed. 
“We’re not ratting our boy out that easily, nice try.” Alex wagged a finger at you across the table. 
“I mean not like he has anything to compare it to.” George countered. 
“Wow.” Lando shook his head while you just giggled proudly and leaned into him again for a moment. 
Your eyes met and the two of you kept your eye contact for a few lingering seconds, sharing sweet smiles side by side as the reminder of the history of your strange little relationship hovered in your mind. You leaned your head against his for a second before turning back to the table like there was nothing going on between you. Lando reached for you under the table and you let him hold your hand, only known by his hawk-eyed best friends but no one else in the restaurant around you. You allowed it. 
The two of you acted so unexplainably platonic otherwise that George and Alex were racking their brains trying to figure out if you were even into each other or you had been pulling their legs the entire time. Even as goodbye hugs were shared at the end of lunch and you and Lando barely exchanged more than a three-second embrace with no drifting hands or sloppy kiss with it, George and Alex were utterly perplexed. 
When the three guys waved you off as you drove away from the curb in your shiny car, George and Alex were turning to Lando, waiting for answers. 
Lando was too apparently as he asked them excitedly, “Well? What did you think? Isn’t she amazing?”
“I mean, yeah, she’s awesome.” Alex agreed, “But, fuck, bro, I’m more affectionate with my sister.”
George nodded in easy agreement, “Yeah, I was ready for some serious PDA the way you talk about her.”
Lando just rolled his eyes, “My God…what’d you think was going to happen? We start sucking face at the table?”
“Maybe.” George and Alex both answered in unison. 
Lando scoffed despite his smile. 
Alex countered quickly, “You talk like you can’t keep your hands off each other.”
George repeated Lando’s confession from the previous day, “Fucking, like, five times a week.”
“And then you barely touch her! Not even a kiss goodbye!” Alex finished, gesturing towards the street that you had disappeared down. 
“Guys,” Lando stopped them calmly, “seriously, I want to literally jump her every second of every day but we can’t. Her job is so public and even everyone at the office apart from her three best friends don’t know about our…relationship…thing.” 
“Can’t she just tell the public that she’s dating you?” Alex crossed his arms over his chest almost defensively. 
“I dunno if we ever are dating.” Lando shrugged. 
“Based on the way she was looking at you?” George scoffed, “She definitely at least wants it.” 
“She has a boyfriend.” Lando reminded them.
“A fake one.” Alex countered. 
“The public doesn’t know that.”
“So tell them.”
“We can’t. It’s in her contract.” Lando pressed. “Believe me, I’ve asked many times. You know I can’t fucking stand that guy. But she insists that she’s not with him and that it’s just PR and I believe her…it just doesn’t make it easy. It’s nearly fucking impossible to not kiss her every second I see her.”
“Personally, I’m not going to believe you until I see you two kiss with my own eyes.” George shrugged. 
“Okay. Then you might be waiting a while.” Lando chuckled as they started to walk back down the street towards Casino Square and the rest of their touristy afternoon together. 
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It wasn’t until Monday that Lando was going to see you again when you were scheduled to pick him up at the hotel like usual to bring him to work. Although he had the week off, you both thought it would be fun for George and Alex to see the office and to meet your friends, especially since Lily - your illustrator - had taken a liking to Alex through social media. Maybe you couldn’t be publicly romantic together but it wouldn’t stop you and Lando from being undercover matchmakers when you could. 
At 8:30 Monday morning, the guys emerged from the hotel lobby to find your Mercedes parked out front waiting for them. George nearly had a skip in his step as he followed closely behind Lando towards the car and when he opened the back door, he sent a disbelieving grin back to Alex. Lando took to the passenger seat - of course - and you greeted him with a brief over-the-console one armed hug like every morning. George and Alex were tucked in the backseat and George was peering around the sleek black interior of your car with his mouth nearly hanging open like a kid in a candy store. Alex gently nudged his jaw shut. 
“Morning, boys.” you greeted them with a smile through the rearview mirror. 
They replied just as warmly and politely as you pulled away from the curb, letting your engine pull you towards the road with such pep that George was beaming and grabbing onto the window ledge of the backseat. Alex rolled his eyes at his dramatics. 
“Are you sure I can’t help out today?” Lando asked you. 
“Nope. You three are visitors only today.” you assured him, “You’re there for a tour and then you’re gone. No way I want you to be doing boring work on the week you guys have finally met.” 
“We’re the office VIPs.” Alex grinned. 
“Pretty much.” you chuckled, guiding your little group through the lanes of early morning downtown Monaco traffic. “Although this is a one time thing and I twisted a lot of arms to allow you guys to pop by so just try not to be too too distracting, okay?”
Alex spoke up jokingly from the seat behind you, “Yes, mom.”
Lando turned over his shoulder to send Alex a weird glare all while you just laughed. George and Alex snickered. 
Just like you had when Lando had first stepped foot in your office, he now accompanied you on showing around George and Alex. The four of you walked the lap of the office from meeting rooms to the lunchroom and the printing room and everything in between and all the while, Lando was just smiling proudly at you. He kept glancing at his best friends just to make sure they were still listening as you explained everything you were proud of when it came to your little office sanctuary. Finally, you ended your walk at the main open space of the office where most of the employee’s desks were laid out. 
Lando flopped into his chair, “And this is my desk. Where the magic happens.”
George snorted, “Okay.” 
Although everyone was working diligently - most with headphones on - you pointed out each important person from your team, ending right down by the desks where you were closest to your office, introducing your three best friends; Oscar, Lily, and Charles. 
Oscar, who had been trained to nearly follow your every move, was already at your side once you approached the area and he held a few files in his hands, insisting that you prepare for your afternoon media interview. You spoke to him quietly for a second, leaving the guys to busy themselves. 
Both Charles and Lily were at their respective desks with their headphones on and their minds busy with their work. George was sitting on the side of Lando’s desk and staring at everything he could possibly stare at, just taking it all in.
Alex, on the other hand, was pacing slowly, skimming the busy office and the dedicated workers that took it up. Lily’s desk was somewhat close to Lando’s and, being the next person nearby, he approached her quietly with his hands behind his back. She was clicking and typing away on her laptop as she edited one of her mockups; she knew your taste well after so long of working together. Alex watched from over her shoulder for a few seconds, going unnoticed by her, and when his gaze shifted from her screen, he scanned her desk. It was busy with some of the work she needed to have on hand but still quite organized and a few trinkets littered the corner. 
He smiled at the sight of the little golfer figurine and he stepped closer casually to poke its bobblehead, making the head with the visor sway to and fro. The sudden close presence had Lily startling out of her zone and she literally jumped at the movement of his hand into her space. 
“Sorry!” Alex took his hand back quickly. 
She pulled off her headphones and turned to him, “What are-”
Her words halted. 
“Sorry.” Alex repeated. He cleared his throat and then gestured to the golfer again, “Just liked your little dude there.” 
Lily followed his point to the bobblehead and then she looked back up at him, “I…thanks.” 
He glanced over his shoulder towards Lando and George who were watching him casually and he turned back to her, “I’m just here with Lando…he’s my best friend.”
Lily nodded with a small smile, “I know.” 
“Right.” Alex chuckled. “Of course you know.” 
There was a pause. 
Lily looked back to her golfer bobblehead that had been gifted to her by yourself on her one year anniversary of working with you. She directed a casual question to the handsome young man who had somehow helped himself to her desk, “So you like golf?”
“Yeah.” Alex answered easily, “But I’m so shit.” 
The shared light laughter. 
“That’s so cool.” Lily replied, “I love it too. Have you given the Monaco course a try?”
“No, not that I could even afford a round.” Alex snorted, suddenly realizing how uncool he sounded. 
Lily offered him a sweet smile and a little shrug, “I mean, you can always come with me sometime. I have a membership.”
Alex gaped, “Really?”
“Yeah, definitely! I’m in desperate need of a golfing partner. None of my friends ever want to come.”
“Seriously. I’m so down.” Alex offered honestly.
“Alright then.” Lily shared in his grin. 
“Lily!” 
Your call from a few metres away had them both looking over at you as if they had been caught doing something they weren’t supposed to. Their shocked expressions had you peaking a brow.
“Was gonna ask if you wanted lunch? Oscar’s gonna order something.” 
Lily nodded, “Yeah. Sounds good.” 
“And our guests have to get going…I have to prep for that Zoom later.” 
Alex quickly shoved his phone at Lily, “Can I have your Instagram or something? We can keep discussing this later if you want?”
She laughed lightly, “We already follow each other.”
“Oh.” Alex could have mentally punched himself in the face, “Right! Yes, I knew that. Sorry.”
She simply giggled and set her gentle hand on his forearm as if to reassure him with a soft, “I’ll message you.”
“Yeah. See ya.” Alex took a step back, “And sorry again for scaring you.” 
“That’s okay.” she smiled bashfully and turned back her laptop. 
Lando, George, and you were already heading for the elevator and he followed after you quickly with a beaming smile across his face, sliding his phone back into his pocket. 
“Was wondering how quickly you and Lily were going to find each other.” you chuckled knowingly as your little group waited for the elevator to arrive. 
Alex just licked away his smile and took one last glance over his shoulder towards the row of desks across the office. George nudged him as the elevator doors slid open. 
Stepping inside, the four of you had a moment away from the looming public and Lando slid his hand into yours easily as if the four walls of the office elevator had already seen enough of your secrecy before. You smiled over at him, letting the presence of his two best friends on his other side fade away as they fell into quiet discussion over two of your friends. 
“You have a good week, okay?” you told Lando gently, “Enjoy not having to work. I’m jealous.” 
“But does this mean I won’t see you all week?” he pouted slightly, keeping his gaze on your face. 
“You can see me whenever you want…but I want you to enjoy yourself with your friends too.” you replied, reaching over to rest your hand against his chest. “Okay?”
Lando nodded, speaking quietly to your lips, “I know. Thank you.” 
“You’re so welcome.” you smiled. 
He leaned in towards you naturally and your hand slid up his chest to wrap around the back of his neck as you met each other halfway for a soft kiss. Lips locked softly, you both lingered there for a moment as the elevator beeped past floor after floor. Only a few seconds later, you were moving back for a lick to your lips and the gentle sound of your kiss had Alex and George whipping their heads around to look, their conversation immediately dropped. 
Lando could feel their eyes on the back of his head and he smiled proudly as he leaned back in towards you and captured your lips with his own. Sharing a few more gentle kisses, you were soon leading him away by your hand back against his chest and you grinned to the elevator screen as the ground floor approached. Lando leaned in once more to kiss your cheek and then you had to let go of each other’s hands to face the public reality once more. 
George and Alex were deer in headlights next to the pair of you, startled by the sudden display of affection you shared and the fact that you had shared it literally right beside them. Meanwhile, Lando was walking on air and as you said your goodbyes and they headed for the bus stop, he was literally radiating. 
Once you were out of earshot, his best friends nearly jumped on him, tugging at his shirt and cheering dramatically for such an innocent kiss. Lando wasn’t totally sure what the big deal was - you had done plenty more than that - but he basked in the attention with pride over the fact that he had you and his best friends held the proof. 
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Monday moulded quickly into Tuesday, the days speeding by with trips all over the Principality and the South of France. As Tuesday ended with a tennis match for the guys and an Uber back to the hotel from the game after a long day, Lando found himself missing you more and more. Laying alone in his hotel room bed, he added up the days it had been since he had been able to fall asleep with you and he dramatically came to the conclusion that he hadn’t gone that long without you sleeping beside him since before he came to Monaco. He didn’t necessarily appreciate that discovery. 
So, to take matters into his own hands, he let his friends keep themselves busy on Wednesday morning as he insisted that he visit the office for lunch. Alex and George didn’t put up much of an argument and they made a plan to meet Lando after at a location to be determined. 
Under the sunny Monte Carlo sky, Lando took the bus farther into downtown to locate the street where the office building was located and he got off a bit early in order to make a pitstop on his way. He first stopped by a florist that housed the most vibrant arrangements of flowers along the sidewalk with chalkboard signs and billowing awnings that reminded him of France and he took his time walking along the rows of water filled pots to find the perfect little bouquet. 
With a bunch of pink peonies in hand and wrapped prettily in paper and cellophane, Lando continued a few stores down to a small bistro. He ordered your favourite pasta that you would always get when you went there - he always paid attention to every little thing about you…you were his dream girl after all and he would take any and every chance to impress you - and then he skimmed their wine list. 
“Anything of interest, sir?” the waiter asked when he returned from punching in the pasta order. 
Lando, who had virtually no experience in ordering wine, hesitated, “Uhm…I want something red.”
“Aged?”
Lando bit his lip, “Yes…old?”
The waiter smiled knowingly at the inexperience of his customer and leaned over the counter to look at the drink menu with him, “Our house wine is good to start off with.”
“Oh, it’s not for me.” Lando said, deciding to chance his invisibility in public without you at his side and therefore not being associated with him, “It’s for my girlfriend.” 
The word tasted too good on his tongue and he looked back down at the menu to hide the rouge that dusted his cheeks, a red that burned as deep as the wine he was ordering. 
“I see. She enjoys red?” the waiter asked. 
“Prefers it.” Lando nodded. 
“Then how about our Cabernet Sauvignon? Grown just outside Nice in local vineyards. Aged to perfection.”
Lando shrugged, convinced, “Sure. If that’s what you think is best.”
So he ended up with a bag of take out pasta, a bottle of red, and a bouquet of flowers in his arms as he took the elevator in the office up to the familiar floor. Maybe it looked suspicious that he was bringing you lunch when he had a week off but he missed you too much and he was willing to risk it for a romantic gesture as such. It had him brushing off the slightly confused smile in greeting from the secretary as he walked past and towards your office. He stopped outside the glass wall and peeked inside, only to find your desk empty.
“Lando.” 
The sharp whisper had him turning around to see Oscar hurrying over to him. A few of the other employees were glancing at him from their desks, probably just as confused over his appearance with a strange combination of items. 
“Hey, Osc.” Lando smiled coolly.
Oscar grabbed his arm and yanked him into your empty office, shutting the glass door behind the two of them.
“What are you doing here?” he spoke quietly but sternly, eyeing the items he was carrying. 
“I brought her lunch.” Lando answered softly, “And flowers. Because I missed her.” 
Oscar glanced back out to the office, his arms folded over her chest. 
Lando followed his gaze, “Where is she?” 
They looked back at each other. 
“She’s in a meeting.” Oscar answered. 
“Okay. I can wait.” 
“That’s not a good idea. Not with all this.” he gestured to the flowers, “What were you thinking? What kind of message does this send?”
Lando pouted, “A nice one?”
Oscar sighed, “Yes, it’s nice but not for the office. This is so risky. Especially today.”
“Why especially today?” Lando frowned. 
His obvious pout had Oscar pausing, staring at the sweet blush on his cheeks and the pleading look in his green eyes, his arms full of caring gifts for Oscar’s best friend. Oscar huffed and dropped his arms into a shrug. 
“It’s not my place.” he admitted in half defeat, “You’re right, it’s a nice gift.” 
“I just wanted to bring her lunch.” Lando mumbled. 
“I know. That was nice of you.” 
“I won’t get in the way.”
“I know.” 
“Is the meeting almost done?”
Oscar glanced back at the analog clock on the wall above your desk and then answered him, “Momentarily probably.” 
“Can I wait here?”
“Sure, but I have to tell her that you’re here.”
“That’s fine.”
Oscar brushed past him and he turned to watch him go, only finding the reason behind his slight panic the moment his eyes caught sight of the subject oncoming down the hall. Lando had to grip tighter onto the items in his arms as the slender brunette figure walking at your side had a fictitious knife jamming itself right into Lando’s heart. 
He had only ever seen pictures of your PR boyfriend, suffered through months and months of watching through social media and news coverages of your dates, your sickening comments on each other’s posts, and everything in between that made him feel his lunch in the back of his throat. Now he knew it was all a facade now but the mere sight of him had Lando’s fight or flight triggering. 
Oscar couldn’t get a single word out before you had already spotted Lando through the glass wall of your office. He had never seen your face fall at the sight of him before that moment. He swallowed. The man at your side locked eyes with him. 
Lando turned away from the hallway as he took a deep trembling breath, “Shit.”
The office door opened and in you came. Lando glanced back to the hallway and Oscar could barely send him a pitied glance, Charles with wide eyes beside him, staring back at him, before you were in his line of vision. 
“Who’s this?” the brunette asked, standing almost protectively right at your side, his words laced in a pristine French accent. Lando could have vomited on his brown designer boots. 
“Oh…this is Lando,” you introduced as calmly, coolly, as you could. “My intern.” 
The fictitious knife twisted in Lando’s chest. 
You unknowingly dug it deeper as you gave skewed context to the man beside you, “Y’know…the fan I flew out for the summer?”
“Ah, that’s right.” he snapped his fingers as if it all came back to him. He then held out his hand to Lando with an honest smile, “Nice to meet you. I’m Pierre. I’m her boyfriend.”
“Yeah.” Lando exhaled shakily but he didn’t have a hand free to take his. The cellophane that the flowers were wrapped in crinkled under Lando’s white knuckled grip. 
You spoke to him plainly, “What are you doing here? Isn’t it your day off?” 
Lando’s eyes searched yours. He wasn’t prepared for this…what it all meant…what he was allowed to say. 
“I…just picked you up lunch.” Lando tried. 
“Right.” you played it off expertly, shooting a smile to the slender Frenchman at your side, “I forgot I had sent for it.”
Lando pulled a tight smile as you took the take out bag and the wine from him. 
“Thank you.” you said, drifting past him to set them on your desk. 
Pierre gestured to the flowers that Lando still held, “The flowers?”
“I asked.” you grabbed them right out of Lando’s hand and barely gave him a second look, your own heart hammering in your chest, as you hurried back across your spacious office to set the bouquet in the empty vase on the table by the window, “Just kinda…brightens up the place.”
“They’re nice.” your boyfriend smiled and nodded. 
“Yeah.” you turned back to Lando, “Thanks.”
Lando’s voice wavered as he answered, “You’re welcome.”
“Anything else?” you asked him, although your eyes nearly begged him to leave. 
Pierre drifted over to you again and draped his arm around your back. 
Lando swallowed back the lump in his throat and he took a step back, “Nope.” 
“Okay. See ya.” you said. 
“Yep.” Lando nearly walked right into the glass wall before his shaking hand found the door handle. He yanked it open and hurried out into the main office space, sniffling casually as his hands jammed into his pockets and he bit his lip so hard it hurt. Lily, Charles, and Oscar watched from their desks as he hightailed it towards the elevator.
But, as your door closed slowly behind him, he caught your boyfriend speaking to you softly, “It’s cute…you can tell he’s a fan; his voice shakes when he talks to you.”
Lando didn’t wait around long enough to hear your response. 
It wasn’t until Lando reached his hotel room that the reality of the situation settled in and - just his luck - his best friends weren’t there. Struggling to keep his breathing controlled as his eyes burned with tears, he pulled out his phone as he started to pace up and down the length of the carpeted room. The fact that he had no message from you only made him more upset and he opened the group chat with his friends. 
landonorris: Where r u georgerussell63: We’re eating lunch at this place a few streets down from the hotel georgerussell63: You’re done already?? landonorris: No landonorris: It went really shitty landonorris: Are you almost done landonorris: Can you come back georgerussell63: I mean our food JUST got here…do you wanna meet us here? Tell us about what happened and maybe eat? landonorris: No I can’t  landonorris: I’m losing my shit rn I can’t be in public  georgerussell63: Fuck mate that bad?? georgerussell63: Wtf happened?? alex_albon: George is a horrible texter when he’s speaking for the both of us alex_albon: We’re coming Lan just hold tight a few minutes landonorris: k
Lando sat himself down on the end of his bed and exited the group chat, being faced with some fan account’s repost of Pierre’s story. It was a picture of you - of course - as you ate your pasta at your desk with the bottle of wine and bouquet of flowers just barely visible in the side of the frame. The caption on the repost was something from the fan expressing her excitement over how ‘cute’ you were and how ‘perfect’ he was for bringing you lunch and flowers. Lando wanted to throw up. 
He opened up his message thread with you, ready to send you some angry note but his thumbs hovered over the keyboard without pressing a button. The last messages stared back at him; your exchange of hearts and kissy emojis and Lando had to rub his hand over his chest from the ache in his heart that lingered. 
The sound of the hotel room door opening startled him - not having expected his friends so soon - but Lando jumped up from his bed to meet them, his face a mix of emotional and pathetic expression. George and Alex were just as wide eyed and not knowing what they were going to be walking into, take-out bags in hand. Lando’s bottom lip trembled over the fact that his friends skipped their lunch for him and the emotions that overtook him from the last hour and he pressed the heels of his palms against his eyes to try not cry in front of them. 
“Fuck.” he said through his teeth. 
“Shit, mate, what the fuck happened?” Alex set his takeout bag on the counter and George did the same, the two older friends hurrying over to tend to the obviously distraught youngest. 
“He was there!” Lando said loudly, dropping his hands. He had to explain but your boyfriend’s name always tasted bitter on his tongue so he settled for the codename that he and his two best friends had made back when your relationship went public, “Fuckin’…guillotine.”
George and Alex’s eyes only widened more. 
“Oh-“ Alex stumbled out. 
“Did he say something?” George pried. 
“H-He was nice but he clearly doesn’t know who I am and she didn’t bother telling him!” Lando continued loudly, “I brought her her favourite lunch and favourite flowers and even a bottle of red wine and she…she played it like she had told me to pick it up for her. She introduced me as her intern. As the fan.”
“I mean…was the entire workplace listening?” George offered an excuse. 
“No!” Lando answered, “It was just the three of us in her office and he was just…he was looking at me! I wanted to punch him in the face! Putting his arm around her…talking to me like I’m a kid! ‘Oh he’s definitely a fan…how cute’. Shut the fuck up. I’d like to hear him try and call me cute again after he finds out the way I fuck her.” 
George and Alex smothered their shocked laughter over Lando’s quick snap back. 
Alex spoke first, “She was probably just surprised that you were there and didn’t know what to do.”
Lando only continued in his emotional tangent, “If their relationship is fake then why does she have to hide it from him? Not like she’s cheating. He’s not the public. What’s it to him?” 
“That’s valid.” George agreed. 
Alex nodded. 
“And!” Lando wasn’t done, “He posted a picture of her eating the lunch that I bought her! Now all the fans are taking it out of context because they don’t know and thinking he bought her all that. ‘What a great boyfriend!’”
His voice broke at the end as he struggled to hold back his tears. George and Alex exchanged nervous glances while Lando waited for their life-changing words of wisdom. 
George sighed, “Jesus, Lan, we hate seeing you like this. We’ve always been a little apprehensive that you’d get hurt through all this and, well, here it is.”
“It’s always good.” Lando assured them easily with a sniffle, “It’s just…not good today.” 
“It’s part of that Monaco life, huh?” Alex pressed, “Like you have always said. It’s fucked up but it’s all just part of this balancing act?”
Lando nodded, “Yeah. It’s so fucking hard to stay afloat.”
“She’ll message you soon to clear today up…I’m sure of it.” George assured him with a gentle pat to his shoulder, “When she does, tell her how it felt today…being a little trapped like that. She’ll understand, I’m sure. Just give her the evening. We can tell she’s super into you so try not to get too in your head about it.”
Alex concluded easily, “And try not to read shit online. People are dumb.”
“Yeah.” Lando rubbed his hands across his in exasperation. 
George stepped closer to pull him into a hug first and Alex quickly joined, the three of them lingering in a group hug for a moment. Lando let out a heavy breath as he found his momentary comfort in the presence of his friends that had once only been able to reassure him with online messages. But now, sharing a hotel room together in Monaco, the three best friends sat down to divide up the two take out bags of lunch just to make sure that Lando had something to eat too. 
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Lando didn’t hear from you all afternoon…all evening…and even well into the following morning. Sitting by the hotel pool that Thursday afternoon, Lando was simmering in his constant state of stress with his phone resting impatiently, screen up, on his thigh. His notebook was open on his lap and he was scribbling notes down in messy lines across the pages as a way to let his anxieties out rather than the less than ideal alternative of sending you emotional paragraphs in your dms. It had been all too long since you had messaged him and not only was he missing you but he was upset with you all in the same. 
On the lounge chair on his right, Alex was bragging to the other two about his nearly daily messages with Lily where they filled the times discussing travel, their families, and their shared appreciation for golf. Lando tried not to be envious - what was there to even be envious of, he would silently tell himself, he was the one who had his girl in bed after all - but the green eyed monster wasn’t kind. Even right there, lounging by the pool, Alex’s shared stories were interrupted a few times by a ding on his phone to which he would make a point to pause his entire train of thought to answer Lily’s message. If it was any other time, Lando would have been elated for his best friend. Because it was right then, he was sure that if he rolled his eyes any farther back he would see his brain. 
“Anyway, where was I?” Alex put his phone down again and tucked his hands behind his head as he stared up to the Mediterranean sun with a smile, “Ah, yes. Lily was saying that she wants to take me to the Golf Club before I leave. She said it’s the most famous one in Monaco…views of the ocean. We might make a day out of it…if she was serious. Maybe she was just being hypothetically nice. Shit, do you think she was just being hypothetical?”
“No way!” George answered easily from Alex’s other side, scrolling aimlessly through his phone although he was still completely listening. He glanced over, “You gotta hold her to that, mate.” 
“I know, I know.” Alex agreed. “We only have a few days left…maybe I should make a plan for tomorrow. Were we going to do anything tomorrow?”
George shrugged, “Nothing specific.”
Lando answered from Alex’s other side, “Just hating my life.” 
Alex reached over and snatched the notebook out of Lando's hand, “What are you even writing in here?”
“Mate.” Lando huffed and tried to grab for it but Alex held it out of his reach as he skimmed the lines. 
“What is this? A poem?” Alex flipped the page. 
“Maybe. I dunno. I’m just scribbling random shit.” Lando mumbled, twirling his pen between his fingers anxiously as his private words were read by the eyes of his best friend. 
“It’s really good.” Alex told him. “You always tend to do your best work when you’re emo.” 
“Yeah, well…” Lando faded out as his notebook was passed back to him. He skimmed a few of his own lines before taking his pen and scratched out a large chunk. 
“Hey!” Alex frowned, reaching over to smack his arm, “What are you scratching out?”
“It’s shit.” 
“It is not.” 
Lando slouched farther back against his lounge chair and continued writing without another word. Alex sighed and picked up his phone from his lap again to answer his messages from Lily that he had missed while reading Lando’s notebook. As he typed his response with a smile, a notification popped down from the top of his screen. 
georgerussell63 sent a post
Glancing to his right in slight confusion, George was already staring right back at him, his expression flat. Alex tapped the notification to open his private chat with George to see what he had sent in such secrecy. The post that was revealed had his eyes going wide. 
alex_albon: Oh fuck georgerussell63: Right?? georgerussell63: Wtf do we do alex_albon: We need to tell him georgerussell63: Do we? He’s already so down after yesterday. This will just make it worse alex_albon: Yeah but he’s going to find out somehow regardless. Better he hears it from us georgerussell63: True…
In unison, both George and Alex looked over at Lando on their far left. Sensing their sudden stares, he looked back at them. Glancing between them, Lando frowned in confusion. 
“What?” 
“We’re gonna show you something and you’re going to hate it.” Alex warned. 
Lando’s face fell, “What? Then…don’t show me.”
“We have to because it’s going to be everywhere in a bit and we need to rip off the bandaid.”
Lando nibbled at his bottom lip, “Okay.”
“Yeah?”
“What is it?” Lando’s voice was wavering already. 
Alex passed over his phone. 
Lando took it cautiously and glanced at the Instagram post that was on the screen. Posted by paparazzi was last night’s footage of you and your boyfriend walking hand in hand to a date venue. Lando scrolled to the next slide and the next, witnessing photograph after photograph of you in a short black dress being touched and swooned over and kissed by this man. Lando zoomed in on the last picture, right up close, so he could stare at the way you were leaning into him with your smiling lips pressed to his and an expensive glass of red wine in your hand. 
Lando had spent all night virtually waiting by the phone for you to call and you weren’t even thinking of him. You were busy getting dressed up and going out with your fake boyfriend; not a care in the world to the way you hurt him that very same day. He never once received a message from you or a warning or any sort of reassurance that it was nothing. 
Lando gave Alex his phone back, letting it go before wiping his hands on his towel beneath him like the news was physically disgusting. He closed his notebook. His two best friends watched him carefully, worriedly. 
“What are you thinking, mate?” George asked. 
Lando didn’t answer as he took a second to stare across the glimmering pool into space, trying to collect his whirling thoughts enough to make a cohesive sentence. 
“Lan?” Alex pressed. 
Lando took a breath and then grabbed his notebook and pen and phone, “I gotta go.”
“Where?” Alex started to get up too. 
“Not you.” Lando stopped them both quickly as he stood up. “Just me. I just…need a fucking second.”
“Are you sure?” George asked. 
“You don’t have to be alone right now.” Alex added. 
“Yeah.” Lando barely offered them a response before he was walking off down the side of the pool area and back into the hotel. 
Alex and George watched him go. 
Lando was burning with heartbroken anger as he approached the elevators and pressed the call button a few times in impatient desperation. He didn’t feel like crying over it anymore - he was so numb to the sight of you with Pierre over the prior year - but now that everything was made more complicated by your situation-ship, Lando was just angry. Hurt and angry made for a cruel emotion stewing in his chest. 
Up in the hotel room, Lando was muttering unpleasantries to himself as he dressed into street clothes, leaving his phone on his bed as he did so. The screen lit up with a response from Oscar to the message he sent on his way up in the elevator, 
-She’s working late at the office tonight. Why do you need to know?
Lando didn’t bother replying as he snatched his phone from the bed, his wallet from the dresser, and was out the door in a flash. 
The late afternoon welcomed Lando out onto the street and he took the usual bus route farther into downtown, leaving his clueless best friends behind without a word of warning. His heart was absolutely hammering in his chest despite the fact that he had no plan ahead of him. Running on emotion was a dangerous thing to do but he needed to do it. He had only spent the last few years chasing you and he wasn’t going to let one useless, irrelevant guy get in the way of that. 
It was past 5:00 when Lando arrived at the office building and it was perfectly silent on the floor when the elevator doors slid open. The reception desk was empty and the logo on the wall behind the desk was dark and Lando hurried right past it and into the just as quiet office that was laid out behind it. 
The only light that was on - countering the fading light from the horizon outside - was the one in your glass framed office. It felt surreal as Lando made his emotional run to you without the slightest clue what he was going to say to you or expect of you once there. Regardless, he stopped right outside your office and took a second to stare at you as you sat at your desk, typing away at your laptop without a care in the world. You were wearing your usual work attire of a skirt and blouse and your hair was free flowing over your shoulders, still hanging onto the shape of the curls that you had styled last night for your date. The pink peonies sat on the corner of the desk across from you. 
Lando pushed open the glass door and helped himself to the room, startling you slightly from your silent writing bubble you had placed yourself in. You looked across your spacious office to where he stood in the doorway. 
“Lando…” you breathed in surprise. “What are you-“
He wasn’t willing to let you speak first. He wasn’t willing to give you the upper hand that you always had on him since the very start. 
“Don’t.” he snapped. “Don’t act surprised because I know you’re not that fucking dumb.”
You shut your mouth in utter surprise over his sudden out of character hostility towards you without even so much as a hello. 
“I know that this,” he gestured between the two of you as he took a step farther into your office, “is really confusing and unlabeled and made so much more difficult because of your work and I get that - I really do - but I am also not a fucking emotionless rug you can walk all over and expect nothing to come of it.” 
“Lando-“ you tried. 
He kept going, his words obviously emotional, and his expression screwed up in an angry mix of sadness and frustration, “We never spoke about what we are and maybe that was stupid but in case you didn’t know, I really fucking like you. My entire goddamn life revolves around you. I uprooted my entire summer to come out here not just to help your team but to be with you because I care about you and I want to spend every second of every day with you because I like you more than you clearly know. You took my fucking virginity for God’s sake, how do you expect me to act after that?”
You sighed softly and closed your laptop, “Lan-“
He cut you off again, “So sorry if I’m not another emotionless shell like everyone else in this stupid fucking city but I thought you’d at least have the decency to tell me when shit was going down. Like, I dunno, when he showed up?”
“Pierre?” you questioned. 
His name made Lando literally flinch. 
“You know he’s just a PR stunt. It’s not real-“
Lando jumped in easily, speaking loudly through your office, “Then why did you introduce me as your intern? Just some stupid fan? If he’s that meaningless then why can’t you tell him about us? Or do you have something you want to tell me?”
You stood up from your desk, “I don’t have anything to tell you. You know more than a lot of people already.”
“Maybe so but you don’t care! Because if you cared you would have told me that he was going to be here! Or that you were going out last night! Instead I had to find out on Instagram about your date night and see pictures of you touching him and kissing him like you’re supposed to be touching and kissing me.”
“It’s for promotion, Lando, I promise you-“
“I don’t give a shit!” Lando shouted. 
It was the first time you had heard him yell and it startled you into wide eyed silence. As he took a step towards you again, you could see the way his eyes nearly shimmered with tears but he kept them back almost expertly. 
“I don’t give a shit what it’s for and who tells you to do it! I deserve to know!”
“Why?” you pushed back. 
“Because you’re mine and I hate this!” Lando yelled. 
“Oh, I’m yours?” you pressed. 
“Yes!” Lando was right on the other side of the desk from you, pressing his finger to his chest purposefully as he spoke directly to you, “You’re mine. You are literally part of my heart and I deserve to know when things happen in your life…things that affect me!”
You leaned your hands on the glass desk in front of you and his eyes dropped to the open neck of your blouse for a split second before meeting your gaze again as you countered him expertly, “What happens in my business world is honestly none of your concern.” 
“Didn’t know being a slut for paparazzi cameras was such an important part of your sales.”
You stood back up straight and crossed your arms over your chest with a rush of rouge to your cheeks so you could only stumble out a, “Oh fuck you.” 
“Fuck you.” he snapped right back, turning his index finger towards you next, “Don’t even try to paint me as the bad guy here.”
“You called me a slut!” 
“Fine! Not like it bothered you before but then pick a better word!” Lando threw his hands up, only growing in volume with each second and each slow taunting step he took around your desk towards you, “What were you being, huh? Selfish? Ignorant? A stupid bitch who likes flaunting her money and her body around this fucked up city for any sliver of male attention because apparently having a genuine every-day guy from the middle class is too goddamn boring for you.” 
“Who the fuck are you right now?” you snapped back, “Because there is no way in hell that you are the same guy from that book signing…the one who brought me flowers-“
“Oh so you finally acknowledge that the flowers were from me! Nice!” Lando checked his imaginary watch, “Only took you almost two fucking days.” 
You let out a scoff in exasperation. 
“Sorry that I’m being a bit intense right now but I’m not going to apologize for being hurt.” Lando continued. “Because I’ve been sitting in my hotel room nearly crying since you completely blindsided me yesterday-“
“I blindsided you?” you gaped. “You came storming in here with a romantic lunch for two like it's our goddamn honeymoon while knowing full well that no one can know about us!”
“What about Pierre? Why can’t he know about us? Are you still involved with him? Are you still sleeping with him and that’s why you couldn’t tell him the truth?”
“Listen to yourself!” you shouted at him desperately, “You’ve gone fucking insane! I’m not sleeping with Pierre! I don’t lie to you! I didn’t feel comfortable telling him everything right there because if you weren’t aware, my entire fucking staff was sitting there with only a piece of glass between us! Get a hold of yourself!”
“Hard to believe when you were sucking face on your date later that night!”
“It’s our job, Lando! Fuck!” you raked your hands through your hair in exasperation, “It was a complete set up! We anonymously tipped the paparazzi to be there and everything for the publicity! We had to play the part! It wasn’t more than a few kisses, a few drinks over dinner, and meaningless hand holding to and from the car. I certainly didn’t enjoy it!”
“A text wouldn’t have been too much to ask!”
You slammed your hand down against your desk with frustration, telling him sternly right to his face as he stood only a foot or two to your right, “If you can’t handle the responsibilities that come with my job then maybe this position isn’t right for you.”
“I’m not here for the job!” Lando answered loudly. 
You responded quickly with a step closer, matching his volume perfectly with your upset expression staring right into his, “Then maybe being with me isn’t right for you!” 
Lando’s hand was on the back of your neck before you could even flinch and he yanked your mouth to his effortlessly. Your lips met a little off centre and you stumbled a bit closer to him as he forced you into a kiss. Almost nervous to touch him, your hands hesitated in midair between you for a beat as your lips locked with his in fiery passion that burned your skin. 
The heat from your intense argument had his heart racing in his chest, thudding against his ribs, and his clothes felt suffocating. He was desperate for air - a release that only you could give him - and your empty threats just made him crazy for more. 
Lando’s hand slid around from the back of your neck to grab you by the throat, guiding you through your shared open mouthed kisses in your silent vacant office. Both breathing heavily from your borderline screaming match only seconds before, the silence rang in your ears and your fingers dusted over the front of his t-shirt, still hesitant to touch him. But Lando just tugged you closer by your throat, taken over by some other force that pulled him out of his shy spell, and his sudden dominance was making you weak at the knees. 
You moaned softly as he guided you back against your desk and your ass hit the edge, your hands falling blindly onto the tabletop behind you, lips still taken by his. 
With a strong bite to your bottom lip, Lando was pulling away from your kiss and his hand around your throat kept your gaze on his as he spoke lowly to you, “Don’t you ever say that to me again. Being with you is and always has been my life’s entire goal.”
You stared at each other for a moment and as the honesty of his words settled in, you reached up to the back of his neck and pulled his lips to yours once more. Lando took a step closer to you, trapping you back against your desk as your arms slung around his shoulders and your body moulded against his. His cautious hands found the dip of your waist and he held you securely as he leaned farther into you, almost bending you backwards slightly as his lips locked with yours. 
The heat of your argument was still lingering in the colour on your cheeks and the sudden flip from anger into passion had your heart thudding in your ears. Your ten fingers pressed into the back of his neck, holding his mouth on yours through desperate emotional kisses that left you dizzy. When you tilted your head to kiss him deeper, Lando’s hand slid back up to your throat and he eased you away with one more nip to your bottom lip. 
“On your knees.” he ordered lowly. 
You had to physically bite your lip to hide the smile that threatened to come to your face at his growing dominance and he stepped away from you just enough to allow you to sink to your knees in front of him. Right away, you were pushing up the bottom of his shirt and popping the button on his pants and tugging down the zipper. 
“Fuck.” Lando breathed in near shock, trying his damndest to keep his composure, knowing he had the upper hand there. He grabbed your wrists to stop you before you could strip him down and you peered up at his face expectantly, the sweetest expression on your face that for a second he forgot why he was so mad at you. But he recovered quickly, “Who’s the only one you're getting on your knees for?”
“You, sir.” you responded easily. 
“Yeah?” Lando let go of one of your wrists so he could push his thumb past your painted lips. “Why’s that?” 
You hummed softly around his thumb, sucking gently as you stared up at him from your spot on your ground. You let him pull it from your mouth with a wet pop so you could answer him, “Because I’m yours. Only yours.” 
He almost believed you just by the look in your eyes. 
The concept of you submitting to him was invigorating and he shuffled down his pants and boxers to his knees and then slid his hand into the back of your hair to pull you closer impatiently. Your hands rested against his bare thighs and your mouth opened gladly, letting him guide his semi-hard dick in against your waiting tongue. You wrapped your lips around him and suckled softly around the head of his cock, humming at the feeling of him growing harder in your mouth with each passing second. 
Lando brushed your hair away from your face and over your shoulders, wrapping it messily around one hand so he could get a good look at you as he slowly eased you closer, his other hand holding up the bottom of his shirt. His dick disappeared into your mouth inch by inch and the warm wet confines that welcomed him in had his mouth falling open silently, burning with desire for you. You had a way of pushing his emotions to the edge time and time again; good and bad. He wanted all of you. 
“That’s it.” he breathed, pulling you deeper until your nose touched the warm smooth skin of his pelvis, “You wanna lie? Keep stupid little secrets from me? Should punish this mouth of yours.” 
You moaned around him, choking slightly as he stiffened completely by then and nudged at the back of your throat. He would never admit that he learned a lot from your novels - especially after hearing from you that you only wrote what you yourself were into - and only more so from firsthand experience in your bed. He only wanted to be good for you. And he wanted you to know just how much you meant to him. He only wanted you. 
On your knees for him, you held yourself steady by your hands on his thighs, starting to bob your head along the length of his dick until he was gripping tighter to your hair and starting to thrust into your mouth. Gagging loudly around him, you dug your nails down into his flesh but took what he gave you, letting him fuck your throat. You shamelessly had craved it since the first week you had met him, wanting him to get rough with you. There was no better time than that mid-argument make-up sex. 
You tapped out on his thigh, letting him know you needed air and he let you sit back for a second. You gasped out of it, watching how strings of spit connected your glistening lips to his swollen dick in front of your face. Blinking away tears that blurred your eyes, you looked up his body to the lustful expression on his face, shadowed by the dim lighting of your office and the sunset lights through the floor to ceiling windows only steps away. Lando set his hands flat on your glass desk, standing strongly in front of you. He impatiently dropped one hand back down to tangle in the back of your hair and pulled your mouth back down on his dick. 
“Fuck.” Lando hissed quietly, greedily starting to thrust into your mouth shallowly. 
The little gags that he fucked from your throat nearly made his eyes roll and he slammed his hand back down on your desk, leaving you to take what he gave you without guidance. You did, of course, holding onto his thighs with your manicured hands as he towered over your body and helped himself to your heavenly mouth and beautiful throat. 
He could have finished himself off right there, dizzy on the perfect sensations of your mouth and the lewd sounds of your throat constricting around him with each thrust he gave you. Standing behind your desk with a clear view of your pristine office surrounding him, Lando was sure it was a dream. It couldn’t get much better than that. Even as he slowed his hips down to a stop, you raised a hand up to keep yourself going instead, moving hand and mouth in quick steady time around his slick cock. 
Lando dropped his hand down to grab your hair and pull your mouth off him again, scolding down to you, “Did I say you could keep going?”
Your soft grip pumped his dick a few more times, coughing out a, “No.” 
“Guess you really are a cockslut, huh? Just fucking desperate for dick?”
“Oh my God.” you groaned at his words, “Yes.” 
Lando forcefully guided you to your feet by your hair, “Get up.” 
You grasped onto his shirt for balance, gasping against his kiss as he tugged your lips on his again. He was filthy with it - choking you with his tongue until you were arching into his body hungrily and your fingers were pulling at his shirt for more. Oh how he had learned so much over the summer so far…
Lando spun you around and shoved you forward against your desk and you caught yourself with your hands flat on the table top. He flipped up your skirt and slapped his whole palm down against your ass, forcing a sharp gasp from your chest as the sound echoed through your glass framed office. 
“Whose are you?” he asked. 
“Yours.” you breathed. 
He spanked you again, “What was that?”
“Yours, sir.” 
Another spank, “Are you?” 
You arched your back a little more so your ass was sticking out farther for him, “Oh my God, yes.” 
He groped the flesh of your ass in one hand and jiggled it, “Does anyone else get to touch you like this?” 
“No, sir.” you answered softly, licking away your eager smile. 
“Why’s that?” Lando slapped your ass again. 
“Oh, because I’m all yours.” you rushed out, pushing back against him desperately. 
Lando’s hands caressed your ass and your waist as you ground back against his body until his cock was pressed between your cheeks and against the thin lace of your skimpy little panties. 
“I’m your pretty little slut.” you promised. 
Your words and your insistent touch had him groaning lowly, his eyes focused down to your ass and he linked one finger around the lace of your panties and pulled them to the side, allowing himself room to teasingly angle the head of his cock between your cheeks. You shuttered at the feeling, hands flat on your desk and just waiting for him to take you, any hostility immediately vanished from your mind at that moment. 
“Please.” you breathed. 
Lando nudged the head of his cock against your pussy, smearing it between your slick folds, “Tell me you’re mine.” 
“I’m yours.” you answered easily. “Please, sir, I’m all yours.” 
Lando brought his hand up to lick across his three fingers so he could smear it between your legs to get you just a bit wetter. He then had to take a silent anticipatory breath before easing steadily inside you, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip as your body gripped around him so tightly. Your stiff whimper at the stretch had his hand raising to wrap around your throat and his other grabbed a handful of the back of your skirt that was bunched up around your waist and he slipped deeper into you. 
“Holy shit.” you exhaled shakily, “You’re so fucking big-“
Lando didn’t bother giving you a second to adjust before he was starting to thrust into you, tightening his hand around your throat. Your tight whimper and the snug grip of your pussy had his jaw clenching and his rhythm growing faster. His hand smacked down hard across your ass, making you squeak. 
“You like this, don’t you? Dirty slut.” Lando growled from behind you, letting his lingering anger out on your welcoming body. 
“Yeah, I’m your dirty slut. Your dirty little fucking slut.” you cried out, trying to fuck yourself back on him.
He spanked you again to stop you and then took his hand from your throat to push you down by the back of your neck, forcing you to bend at the waist over your glass desk. His tight grunt as he sped up had your mouth dropping open, slouched forward onto your forearms on either side of your closed laptop and your body took his quick strokes as deep as he could reach. It just made it easier for his balls to clap wetly against your pussy, making you arch deeper for him until they were hitting your aching clit with each thrust. 
“F-Fuck-“ you choked out. 
His hand grabbed a fistful of your hair to tug your head back as he had his way with you, fucking you over your desk until your moans were filling the glass framed room just how he had always dreamt. He spanked you across the ass again, leaving a blushing pink handprint on your skin in the light of the desk lamp that rattled with the rhythmic shuttering of the desk beneath. He wanted to claim you as his forever. 
Dizzy with lust, he let it speak for him, “Whose is the only cock you’re taking? Hm?”
“Yours, sir.” you choked out and reached an arm out to grasp the opposite edge of your desk for something to hold onto. “Fuck, it feels so good!” 
“Yeah?” he tugged your hair harder, making you cry out loudly through the office. 
“Oh, God, Lando!” you sobbed out, struggling to keep the smile from your face, “Just like that!” 
Wide eyed at his unknown ability to have you so pleading and responsive, Lando was burning with energy. He had enough practice with you over the summer that he wasn’t going to come so early anymore but he knew that wasn’t going to last long if you kept crying out for him like that. Even then, he definitely didn’t want you to stop. 
You only grew wetter as the seconds passed until you were streaking his cock in slick arousal right down to the base, dripping down his balls, and the sound of him fucking you over your desk just grew louder. His hand in your hair prevented you from dipping your face down against your desk, forcing you to keep your eyes up and across your spacious corner office, staring right out the floor to ceiling windows opposite with a view of dusk painting the city. But with one more sharp spank across your ass, Lando was leaning down over top of you with one hand flat on your glass desk and the other moving from your hair to your throat, squeezing the air from your lungs as he fucked you faster, deeper, his blue eyed gaze watching how your expression moulded into pain and pleasure all in once. It was erotic. 
“God, you’re so fucking gorgeous.” Lando groaned. “I better be the only one getting to see this face…looking so screwed up with pleasure for me.”
“Only for you.” you promised quickly, struggling to get words out with the way he pounded you over your desk. Even still, you arched your back for him the best you could to help him deeper, squeaking out a tight, “Yes.” 
“Good girl.” Lando mumbled, his warm breath falling against your temple, “Good little slut.” 
“Oh my God, s-sir- I’m gonna cum-“ you choked out, whimpering under his hand around your throat and your toes only curled in your red bottom heels against the floor. 
But before you could, Lando stood up and pulled out quickly, leaving you shuttering through the sudden emptiness and gasping as his hand left your throat. You slumped forward onto your desk until you were laying across your laptop, writhing with how close he had gotten you before leaving you throbbing with desire. He grabbed you by the back of your shirt and bunched up skirt and tugged you up, holding you in front of him like that, trapped between his body and the desk. You reached a hand back to try and pull his lips on yours by the back of his neck but he grabbed your arm to stop you. 
“Do you think you deserve kisses?” he asked lowly, right to your face. 
“I just want you to touch me.” you pleaded sweetly, grinding back against his body. 
Lando responded right against your ear, “I think I need to hear an apology before you are allowed to cum.” 
You licked away your smile as you stared back at him, “Sorry.” 
He slapped his hand down against your ass, “Not enough.” 
You whined softly for him, trying to pull his hands to touch you. Lando stepped away. 
He kicked off his shoes as he gave you your order, nodding to the narrow table against the wall behind your desk, “I want you up on that console table there. Legs spread.” 
He was so demanding it made you drip and you didn’t argue before hopping up onto the finished wood console, watching as he dropped his pants and boxers completely and kicked them to the side. His shirt came off next and you licked your lips at the sight of his naked body standing before you, your legs draped open wide over the edge of the narrow table, waiting for him. Your shirt was next as Lando pulled it up and over your head to let it drop to the floor with his clothes before he was following, getting on his knees in front of you. 
He barely gave you a second to process before he was prying your thighs apart wider and dragging his tongue up your pussy. You exhaled shakily and dropped a hand down to his hair as he moved right back in with strong purposeful licks to clean up the messy wetness that had smeared all over your skin from the way he fucked you only moments before. He had grown so addicted to the taste of you over the summer that it was almost rare when he wouldn’t go down on you. Even when you made him the angriest, the saddest, the most worried, he always wanted a taste. It was still you after all; his dream girl. 
“Lando…” you called sweetly, dazed with lust, and you reached down between you to link a finger around your soaked panties that were still just pushed to the side, “please take these off.”
He couldn’t say no to that and he took hold of the bunched up waistband and dragged the lacy material down your legs and to the ground. He then grabbed one of your thighs and pushed it up to hold you open for him, letting his tongue push inside you greedily to lick you out properly. Your hand in his hair only held him closer as your head fell back against the wall with a string of heavenly moans and whimpers that he forced from your chest. He only knew your body and no one else's so everything he learned was catered to you, meaning that every single thing he did was enough to make you breathless. 
Lando’s tongue toyed with your clit soon after, his eyes staring up at you from between your legs as he flicked a steady rhythm only increasing with speed consistently. Your hips ground against his face as you whined and moaned through your office, your head falling gently back against the wall between your two framed literary awards that hung proudly behind your desk. Lando was in complete heaven, all-encompassed by your taste and sounds that only proved to him that he was always the one for you. 
He suckled at your pussy with wet lips and tongue until his mouth was glistening and you were draping your leg over his shoulder, your heels falling from your feet one after the other until they hit the ground with two dull thunks. Writhing under his touch, you were moaning to the darkened ceiling, tugging at his hair, and blessing your office with the sound of his name on your lips. 
But then Lando was pulling away again and standing up, forcing a displeased cry from your throat that he silenced with his mouth on yours. Your hands grasped the sides of his neck as he kissed you strongly and you worked to keep up with his insistent pace of lips and tongue. You couldn’t think of anything else but him, not ever, but especially not when he was situating himself between your legs and pushing your thighs apart farther until they burned and he swallowed your strained whimper with his pillowy lips. 
In seconds, he was gliding his dick between your folds and then pressing it inside you again, watching how your head dropped back to break your kiss with the most erotic expression spread across your face. Lando could hear his heartbeat in his ears, burning at the sight of you giving into him. He grabbed your hips for stability and right away started to fuck you again, letting the filthy slick sound of your soaked pussy taking him in again and again fill your silent office. 
“Oh my God, Lando.” you cried out softly, wrapping your arms around his shoulders tightly to keep him close as you propped the heels of your bare feet up on the edge of the console table to keep your body spread for him. 
“Whose are you?” he tried, his breath falling against your cheek in jagged pants from the rough way he was fucking you. 
“Yours.” you answered melodically. 
“Whose?” he pressed, wrapping his fingers around your throat again. 
You groaned beautifully under his hand, staring into his eyes, “I’m yours, Lando.” 
“Uh huh-” he licked his lips, staring at how your breasts were pushed up nice and full in your bra, “No one else’s.” 
He used his other hand to grab onto the bunched up material of your skirt so he could fuck you hungrilly, keeping his eyes on your face as he did so. That way he could see every flash of expression that grazed your face, framed in the background by your awards that he himself had magazine cut outs of back in his bedroom at home. Now he was fucking you in front of the real things…having you as his own…life was a dream. A dream of just him and you. 
You could feel that overwhelming warmth building inside you again, your toes curling over the edge of the table with how you were spread for him, and your fingers dug down into his shoulders pleadingly. His hand tightened around your throat, choking your moans, and he kept his dick ramming into you in quick precise strokes that had your muscles fluttering around him. He was going to lose it.
So he pulled out. 
“Oh fuck you!” you gasped out sharply, the growing pleasure withering away into nothing again. You dropped a hand down to rub pleading at your pussy but he shoved you away, determined to stay completely in charge. 
“You are not the boss of me, you hear me?” he spoke sternly to you. “Just because you’re pretty and rich and successful does not mean you can walk all over me.”
“No, sir.” you hurried out, wrapping your legs around his waist to try and pull him into you again. 
“No, sir.” he mocked you gently, squeezing your cheeks in his hand. “That’s what I like to hear.” 
You dropped your tongue out expectantly. He spit strongly into your mouth. 
“Hold onto me.” he ordered quietly. 
You tightened your legs around his waist and your arms around his shoulders and he anchored his hands under your ass so he could hoist you up off the console table and into his arms. He wasn’t insanely strong but it was still impressive and you dipped down to kiss him messily as he walked you across the office and over to the closest floor to ceiling window. Your back hit the cool glass first and you moaned into his mouth as the evening soaked city lay beyond you, threatening with sights of strangers if it weren’t for the unrecognizable height you were at in the building. 
He took you so confidently like he had experience from the start and the sudden switch in his demeanor was completely arousing to you. You held his lips on yours by a gentle hand holding his jaw as your other arm was slung securely around his shoulders, breathing between your filthy wet kisses that only made you drip down your thighs. 
“Lando…” you exhaled shakily, “Please.” 
Despite the way you were magnetized to his lips, his eyes were open and lingering on your sweet face, holding your angelic body in his arms right up against the glass window to show you off as his own. He licked his way into your mouth, hungry, lost in the way you begged for him. 
“Please, baby.” you pleaded against his mouth, tugging gently at the roots of his fading blonde dyed hair, “Please fuck me. I want your perfect cock inside me, please.”
“Only mine?”
“Only yours, yes, sir.” 
Lando hoisted you up a little higher against the window and when he was sure you were secure, he moved one hand from supporting you to angle his dick between your spread legs. 
He opened his mouth to speak but you were one step ahead of him, giving him exactly what he expected of you with a breathy, “I’m yours.”
“Oh my God, good girl.” Lando groaned, rewarding you with the fullness of his dick sheathing inside you once more. 
Your head fell back against the window with a gasp, “Fuck!” 
Lando was sure he was running on adrenaline, buzzing with desire for you and the way you submitted to him so easily. He was hungry for you and completely dependent on the sound of your moans and how you begged for him, barely giving you a second to adjust before he was fucking you against the window, his eyes focused on your face. 
“Fuck!” you squealed again, clinging onto him tighter, “Yes!” 
His arms were aching slightly with how he needed to hold you up but your body wrapped around his made it impossible for him to stop. It was slightly clumsy the way he held you up with both of his arms around your waist and he would have second guessed his ability if it weren’t for the way he nearly had you sobbing. Your hands in his hair only tugged harder as he fucked you faster, grunting lowly against your cheek as the warmth of lust washed over him. 
“Oh my God, please don’t stop!” you cried out, body bouncing against the window as he had his way with you. 
A thing right out of his fantasies. 
He had you pinned right back against the glass and with every thrust he was pulling out nearly all the way before slamming back into you, making you feel every inch of him in such quick succession that your mouth was hanging open in near awe, struggling to keep his eye contact. The sounds you made were filthy and he couldn’t get enough of them, paired so perfectly with the wet slap of your skin. Lando’s left hand landed heavily against the window, leaving his arm around your waist since the way you clung onto him was support enough, giving himself the support to hold himself up. 
“Yes, just like that!” you pleaded, curling yourself into his neck in pleasurable overwhelm and your arms went right around his body. “Yes, sir, yes, sir, yes, yes, yes-”
“Fuck, baby-“ Lando moaned right up against your ear. 
Your nails raked across the skin of his bare back, painting him in red scratches that only expressed the way he brought pleasure to your body, clinging onto him desperately. He was overwhelming and the moans that spilled from your lips were uncontrollable, all thanks to the way he fucked you like you truly were all his. 
“Please-“ you sobbed into his neck, “Please- I’m gonna cum-“
Lando didn’t flinch, “Tell me you’re sorry and then you can cum.”
You answered easily, loudly, “I’m sorry!” 
“Mean it.” 
He still hadn’t stopped fucking you in that same addicting pace and you struggled to put together words to create a coherent sentence. 
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you!” you stumbled out, your words only made jagged by your messy moans and whimpers that he forced out of your body. “I’m sorry! I’m only yours - I promise! I promise!”
Lando’s proud smile was directed out the window as your body was clinging onto him and your face was buried in his neck. You obediently waited for his permission but holding yourself back was almost unbearable. 
“Please.” you whimpered. 
“Cum for me.” Lando ordered. 
“Oh my God.” you gushed in relief, letting yourself so quickly fall into pleasure that he brought you. 
Your nails pressed tighter into his back and your teeth sunk into his neck, needing some way to let out the intense feeling that rushed within you and bubbled to the surface. You tensed up in his arms, your pussy squeezing the life out of his dick as he fucked you into your orgasm and he groaned tightly to the window as he forced himself through it. 
Shuddering in his arms, he had to take his other hand from the glass to wrap around you again, holding you close as you gasped out his name and a pleasurable tear escaped your eye and fell onto the flushed skin of his neck. 
“Lan-do- fuck-“ you choked out of it, only having your easing out interrupted by the first thick spurt of him coming inside you. “Yes-“
His moans were loud and beautiful and you shut your eyes to focus on every inch of him, right down to how he shoved deep into you and gave you every last drop of warmth. All for you. 
Your hand raised to the back of his neck and you blindly pulled his lips to yours, sharing a few breathless off-centred kisses as he finished inside you, leaving his throbbing cock deliciously in place for a few more seconds. You gave each other little moans and sighs as your pleasure tapered off and after a few seconds, Lando had to pull away from your lips to catch his breath. 
“Gotta put you down.” he whispered. 
“Okay.” you permitted, carefully removing your wobbly legs from around his waist so he could pull out and help you stand on the floor properly. But your arms stayed around his neck and his hands rested on your waist, letting your heavy breathing fall in steady time as your noses brushed. Your lips nudged onto his next, sharing a few soft chasté kisses in the quiet light of your office, darkened by the sunken sun as he held you against the window. 
You pulled away with a lick to your lips and gently ran your fingers through the back of his hair, “You hungry?”
Lando let a small smile play at his lips, “Yeah.”
“Okay.” you rubbed his shoulders and dragged your hands down his chest, “I’ll order something and we can eat and talk for a bit.”  
Lando nodded, his pride suddenly exchanged with nervousness, “Okay.” 
You shimmied your skirt back down and Lando drifted across the spacious office to retrieve his discarded clothes and he pulled on his underwear and tossed you yours, trying not to let his mind stew over what you wanted to talk about. 
You grabbed your phone from your shifted desk and opened up an app to find something to order in, sitting yourself down on the small couch opposite your work space in only your skirt and bra. Lando drifted over to join you and he - almost nervously - sat himself down on your left. 
“Anything you’re craving?” you asked. 
He just stared at you, “Nope.” 
“Burger?”
“Sure. Whatever you want.” 
With your food ordered and waiting for its delivery, you were left to the silence of your empty office and the comfort of your private little lounge area despite the glass wall that stretched in front of you. The employees’ desks and meeting rooms were dark and vacant. Lando was staring at you as you stretched forward to set your phone on the coffee table and then you rested back again. 
You looked back at him. When you saw the expression on his face, you reached out a hand to rest against his bare chest and feel the thudding of his heart under your palm. A tiny smile came to your face, “What’s got your heart racing?”
“You.” Lando answered easily, his voice gentle as if the dim lighting of the office required it. 
“And fucking me all over this room?” you teased. 
He laughed lightly despite the nervousness that rose within him, “Yeah.” 
Teasing him just a little, you caressed the side of his neck, “You did well. You’re learning lots, young Padawan.” 
“Shut up.” Lando looked away from you with a small smile and a gentle shake of his head. 
There was a pause between you, tense silence lingering, and Lando kept his gaze on the coffee table with his teeth sunken into his bottom lip. 
You rubbed the back of his neck tenderly, “Can you look at me please?”
He took a small breath and looked back at you. 
“I’m sorry.” you said, “I really am.” 
Lando dropped his gaze to his lap, picking at his fingernails anxiously. 
Your hands framed his face and gently pulled his head up to get him to look at you again, “That was really shitty of me to not tell you what was going on.” 
“Yeah.” he breathed, barely audible. 
“I promise that you’re my only one. You’ve captured my heart in ways no one else has, I told you that.”
He nodded. 
“You’re the only thing that matters.”
You leaned in to kiss him, locking your lips with his in slow sensual kisses that had nothing but the strongest devotion behind them. Lando slowly lifted his hand to the back of your neck, melting into your lips and touch as he followed your lead until the gentle passion made him dizzy. You felt the same as he had a way of sending your heart and soul spiraling and you shifted a little closer to him on the couch so you could feel more of his heavenly presence. 
After a few long seconds, Lando’s words were suffocating him at the back of his throat, desperate for more reassurance, and he had to pull away from your kiss for a moment. You almost didn’t let him but you brushed your nose against his adoringly as he licked his lips and worded his question, “And Pierre?” 
Dizzy on bliss with a mind only taken by the man in front of you, you hummed out a, “Who?”
Lando smiled lightly, “Good answer.” 
You giggled with realization and pushed your lips back on his once, twice, and then you were sitting back. 
“He’s nothing. He’s work.” you rehashed, petting your hand through his messy hair, “I’ll tell him about us, okay?”
Lando, suddenly feeling a bit of shame, replied, “You don’t have to.”
“I do.” you nodded, “You made some good points when you came in here yelling at me.” 
You shared small smiles and Lando scoffed lightly with a shrug, speaking to your lips since looking into your eyes felt like too much sometimes, “I will never let you push me away.” 
“I’m not…pushing you away.” you spoke as casually as you could but the words held some sort of realization on your tongue and you faded quietly. You looked down, unable to meet his gaze as he stared at you so intently right beside you. 
Lando whispered his gentle notice, “You were pushing me away.” 
“I…” you didn’t know what to say. You hadn’t even realized it. You turned to face forward on the couch, eyebrows furrowed in thought as you reminded yourself of your actions from the last week. 
“I don’t know why you don’t think you deserve to be treated nicely. Even every time I compliment you it’s like you can’t ever accept it.” Lando continued softly, “You are my dream girl…woman…both inside and out and I’m not just saying that. You really are unbelievable to me…you take my breath away all the time and I still can’t believe that you want some random guy like me. Maybe sometimes that makes me a little paranoid and scared…maybe we’re kinda the same like that.” 
“Unable to accept the niceness of each other?” you chuckled. 
Lando smiled and shifted to sit forward on the couch too, “Yeah?” 
You sniffled although you weren’t crying and you looked at him at your side, “Yeah.”
“Nothing you could do could ever put me off.” Lando promised. “Unless you lie to me and hide things from me…then I’ll be a little upset but nothing we can’t work out, okay?”
You nodded, “Okay. I’m sorry.”
“That’s okay.” he leaned in to kiss you once. 
You smiled softly and chased his lips for one more kiss. Your hand reached for his on his lap and you slid your fingers between his, “And I’m not going anywhere so don’t keep thinking I’m going to find someone better because I’m not.” 
Lando leaned into you, “Okay. I’m gonna hold you to that.” 
You rested your head against his and, hands holding each other’s, you sat there in peaceful silence for a moment. Lando even closed his eyes, cherishing the warmth of your presence. He really wanted to tell you he loved you. 
Your phone lit up from its place on the coffee table and you reached forward to retrieve it, skimming the notification before announcing, “Our food is here!” 
Lando held onto your hand a little longer even as you stood up from the couch and you dipped down to kiss him once. 
“I’ll be right back.” 
“Promise?”
You smiled widely and kissed him again, “Promise, lover.” 
He let you go. 
You tugged your shirt on and slid into your heels while on your way out the door of your glass framed office and you hurried to the elevator to meet the delivery driver on the street. It was only then that you realized you were dripping cum down your inner thighs and you did your best to keep your legs together under your skirt as you shuffled across the vacant building lobby to the front doors. The driver was waiting on the other side and you pushed them open to grab your bags with a polite thanks and a wish good night. There was a handsome man waiting for your return upstairs after all; no time for small talk with strangers. 
When you were walking back down the hallway towards your office, you stopped outside the glass wall to watch as Lando - in only his boxers - arranged a little set up for the two of you on the rug. He had pushed aside the coffee table and set the two throw blankets and few decorative cushions on the floor in front of the couch, leaving the room still dimmed to only the light of the desk lamp. Despite the faint lighting, the emergency lights that lined the main hallway allowed a bit more visibility and enough so that you could make out the red scratches down his back. 
Smirking proudly, you lingered in the doorway just to stare at him for a moment, “Those pretty red scratches down your back do you wonders, baby.” 
Lando glanced over at you in surprise at your appearance but he broke into a bashful grin, “Glad you think so.” 
He then grabbed something from the couch and tossed it over to you. Your panties landed at your feet. 
“You forgot something.”
“I know.” you chuckled, kicking them back towards him with the toe of your heel, “I was kinda leaking down my legs the entire way downstairs. My thighs hurt from clenching them together so tightly.”
“You know, when I passed them to you, that meant put them on.” Lando tisked lightheartedly as you set the takeout bags on the coffee table and he stood close at your side. 
“Where’s the fun in that?” you replied casually as you started to unpack your food, “I like feeling you drip out of me.”
Lando’s little shuttering gasp made you smirk and he gave your bum a gentle smack, “Dirty girl.” 
With your food spread out on the table and the bottle of red wine you ordered sitting prettily in the middle, you left Lando to get situated as you retrieved two glasses from the bar cart by the window and once you passed them to him to fill, you kicked your heels off and pulled your shirt back over your head. You couldn’t let him be the only one half bare. 
You joined him on the rug and cuddled up close to his side with you both leaning back against the bottom of the couch. In your close proximity, you gently clinked your wine glasses together with your eyes focused all on each other as if you couldn’t get enough. 
“To us?” Lando asked. 
“To us.” you agreed with a smile and you took your first sips. 
As close as possible on your office floor, you shared your late dinner for appetites that had only grown substantially since he had helped himself to your desk more than an hour earlier. It was quiet for the first little bit as you focused on eating and drinking but as you slowed down, your focus was turned back to each other. 
Lando’s arm was around your shoulders and you were leaning into him happily, sharing fleeting feather soft kisses between feeding each other french fries. After almost two days of lows, Lando felt on top of the world again. You had a tendency of doing that to him. 
It was the way you always wanted more of him as you chased his kisses with one more, two more, pulling him in by the back of his neck to taste the rich red wine that stained his lips. Lando always seemed to swoon over how you silently showed how you craved him just as much as he always craved you. 
You rested your head on his shoulder with a quiet sigh, “I’m sorry my work is shitty.”
“It’s not shitty.” Lando answered easily.
“I don’t like that we have to be so cautious all the time.” you confessed, gently swirling your last few sips of wine around the bottom of your glass absentmindedly, “I want to be normal with you.”
“What’s normal?” Lando asked.
“Where we can go out for dinner without speculation…hold hands…look at each other for more  than five seconds even around the office.” 
Lando smiled to himself at the thought of those simple acts that were off limits for the two of you but he gave you a gentle squeeze, “That’s okay. It’s moments like this that make up for all that.”
You looked at him, “You sure?”
He nodded, his eyes drifting between your lips and your eyes, “Totally sure. I don’t mind being your little secret. It’s kind of thrilling sometimes.”
You smiled back at him, “It is, isn’t it?”
He slid his arm from around your shoulders and gently pulled at your bottom lip, “Mhm.” 
You leaned in towards him so you were almost resting against his chest and you caressed his cheek with the back of your finger, “I’m so thankful that I met you…that you waited in that lineup…stayed until the very end…and convinced me to come to dinner with you.”
Lando rubbed your back, staring deeply into your eyes, “I’d do anything for you. Always have. Always will.” 
You leaned in to press your lips to his, lingering there a moment or two before pulling away again. 
“Mm mm.” Lando hummed, raising his hand to the side of your neck to pull you back in for more. 
You smiled happily into his kiss, sharing a few closed mouthed innocent kisses as the last few french fries grew cold in their takeout containers. But as you both melted into each other and your lips locked deeply, kisses growing stronger, warmer, your leftovers were the last thing on your mind. It was like a dance between the two of you that had been only perfected over the summer right down to the way your tongues matched each other’s motions precisely until you were feeling those perfect butterflies in your stomach. Lando knew if it went on any longer, he’d definitely get hard again - that was so easy for you to do to him. 
But it wasn’t long before you were pulling away slowly, leaving both your lips pouted naturally out of it as your eyes fluttered open to meet each other’s gaze. You caressed his chest with your hand that wasn’t claimed by your glass and you requested of him breathily, “Come home with me.” 
He would never say no to you.
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er-osion · 3 months
Text
Stay (in my life)
pairing: Jason Todd x gn!Reader
summary: Red Hood comes back to your apartment for a patch job again, but his injuries are a bit more severe this time so he accepts your offer to stay over
word count: 4.3k
warnings: blood, fairly detailed descriptions of injuries, fluff
author’s note: sorry this one’s a little long ya’ll, i got a bit carried away. hope you guys enjoy. you can read part one here.
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“Holy shit, you look terrible!” You gasp as you take in Red Hood’s battered form as he clumsily steps over to your couch.
“Thanks, you look great too.” Hood grits out in reply as he slumps into the cushions. You hurry to grab your med kit and rush over beside him.
“You’re getting blood all over my couch, Hood.”
“Don’t worry, sweetheart, I’m really good at getting stains out.”
“I hope you’re also really good at surviving what appears to be multiple stab wounds and severe burns.”
“You’d laugh at that statement if you knew my background.”
“We’re gonna have to move this to the bathroom, I need better lighting and access to the sink.”
“I just sat down.” Hood exasperated.
“You know it’s not far.” You rolled your eyes at his words but couldn’t fight the rising anxiety at his condition. On instinct, you got up and held out your hand for him to take. Hood moved his head to look at your hand.
“Considering my size and condition, I don’t think you’re gonna be much help getting me off this couch by yourself.” He noted, unimpressed.
You narrowed your eyes at him but kept your hand where it was, “It’s more the sentiment. However, in your condition you might very well need all the help you can get walking the short distance to my bathroom.” Hood paused but set his gloved hand in yours. It was dirty with dust and what you assumed was blood and gripped tightly, probably more so than he realized, but you paid no mind with your thoughts wrapped up in Hood’s less than favorable state. The vigilante got up slowly from your couch and he wobbled to and fro once he was on his feet. The two of you started to move carefully to your bathroom, which was just down the hall, but Hood seemed to be more injured than you initially thought because his knees suddenly became weak and you both had to make a combined effort to catch him.
“Did you hit your head tonight?” You ask as Hood tried to restabilize himself.
“You asking if I have a concussion?” Hood responded.
“That’s exactly what I’m asking, yes.”
“It’s highly probable. I was thrown against a cement wall pretty hard.” Hood moved and wrapped one of his large arms around your shoulder for more support, immediately putting more of his weight onto you. The man was heavy beyond belief, but he did his best not to pile his muscle mass on top of you. The arm around your shoulders was secure and his hand gripped the fabric of your t-shirt tightly. Hood groaned while he settled more into you and you began walking again. Despite your rampant mind, your heart hammered in your chest at the contact and you felt the skin touching his arm dance. By some miracle, the two of you made it to your bathroom, and you did your best to help Red Hood down onto the floor in front of your bathtub.
“Can you just start listing off all your possible injuries while I get all my supplies out?” You asked Hood while you opened the first aid kit. Hood complied, and started listing off all the places he suspected was injured during his patrol tonight. You noticed, though, that his words sometimes got slurred and his sentences kept drifting off —in other words, he didn’t seem all there. “Are you sure you don’t have a concussion?” You probed.
“Told you, it’s very possible. What do you think, doc?” Hood shot back.
“In all honesty, I suspect you have a concussion. Maybe not a severe one, but a concussion is still bad no matter the level. How does your head feel, where it got hit?”
“It hurts.”
“No shit Sherlock, but I was hoping for a more detailed answer.”
“I guess it’s kind of a dull pain? Not like a migraine, but it also hurts in my neck and back of the head.”
“Okay, I think we need to deal with your head first.” You stopped when you realized the implications of your words. You’d need his helmet off to examine his head for any open wounds, you’d never seen Red Hood with his helmet off. Hood seemed to realize this at the same time since you saw him tense suddenly. Neither of you moved or said anything for a couple seconds, trying to figure out how to proceed. You quickly tried to remedy the awkwardness, “Look, I know I’m not supposed to see your face, I’m just concerned about your head but the last thing I want to do right now is push your boundaries, so if taking off the helmet is a no-go we’ll figure something else out.”
Red Hood shook his head, “No, you’re right, as usual. I trust you won’t go mouthing off about what the Red Hood’s face looks like.” He teased as he moved his hand up toward his helmet. You heard a clicking noise and a quiet hiss and felt your body still with anticipation. Hood slowly removed the helmet and you saw him peel off a domino mask underneath.
When his face was bare and uncovered in front of you, you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding. He’s beautiful. Red Hood was the most gorgeous man you’d ever seen. His eyes a mystifying swirl of green and blue, dim with exhaustion but there was still this inexplicable unnatural glow to them. His hair —while slightly matted from the helmet— looked deliciously soft, the color of the night sky with a bold white streak at the front. There was a long thin scar connecting one of his eyebrows to his pale pink lips. You were speechless as you took in Hood’s face, trying to wrap your head around how someone could look that goddamn beautiful. It really wasn’t fair. Your heart was racing out of your chest and you were having trouble maintaining a steady breath while you gazed at his features. Red Hood noticed your stare and shifted a little uncomfortably under your gaze, his gemstone eyes gluing themselves to the ground.
“You gonna stare at my face all night, or are you gonna fix me up?” His voice snapped you back to reality.
“Right right, sorry. I just… wasn’t expecting to finally learn what you looked like tonight… got caught up in the surprise I guess.” You tried to cover your embarrassment and scooched closer so you could examine his head. You looked around and felt very gently for any bumps or wounds. “Hood, you’re bleeding at the back of your head.” The worry in your voice was prominent.
“That would help explain the dizziness.”
Your lips pulled into a line and you started to clean his head wound as carefully as you could, and then wrapped it gently with a bandage. You then made the vigilante promise not to fall asleep on you while you worked on the rest of his injuries. The rest of his body made the head injury look like a splinter. Multiple abrasions were littered across his torso, the molested skin was red with blood and irritation. You could see small bits of debris lodged in the surface of his cuts and abdomen. The slashes on his arms were in a similar state. As if the knife assaults weren’t enough, spots of his body were marred with blistering burns the color of bright red and white. Your heart stung at the obvious pain your hero must be in. No one deserved this, especially not Hood. Your eyebrows furrowed deeper with concern and your frown carved further into your face.
You were startled out of your thoughts when a thumb brushed between your eyebrows, forcing the furrow to even out. You blinked, and shot your gaze up to the owner of the hand. Hood was looking at you with green eyes that were clouded with emotions you couldn’t pinpoint. He had been frowning, but when you locked eyes, the edge of his lips quirked upward ever so slightly. “Keep that face up and you’ll get wrinkles before you’re thirty.” He teased as his thumb once again brushed between your brows, to further his point.
You huffed and shook your head slightly, but not too much to force his hand off of your face. “Keep coming here on the brink of death at 2 am and I definitely will.” You fired back with the ghost of a smirk. Neither of you felt the need to say anything more, Hood’s hand lingered at the top of your head for a brief moment before he retracted it back to his side. You instantly missed the contact. But, you turned your attention back to the task at hand and began caring for Hood’s various other injuries. You used tweezers to fish out the pebbles that had burrowed into his skin and then cleaned the subsequent areas with water and your saline solution. You looked at each cut to determine if it needed stitches or not. For the ones that did, you warned Hood of your plans each time and made extra careful work of numbing the areas before stitching his wounds neatly and efficiently.
Jason watched you in a daze. He could never get over how well you handled everything. Even though he knew you were worried and filled with anxiety, you worked calmly and with composure. You were focused and didn’t let your fears rule your movements, something he greatly appreciated as the one with the injuries. Jason hadn’t planned for any of this to happen. He hadn’t planned for tonight’s ambush to go so wrong, he hadn’t planned to hobble into your apartment nearly blind with pain and dizziness, and he certainly hadn’t planned to take both of his masks off in front of you. Sure, the two of you had been getting closer as of late. After your offer to host him even on nights he wasn’t injured, Jason had been showing up to your apartment a couple nights out of the week to make dinner and watch tv with you. In the past few weeks, Jason had been relishing in the change in your dynamic. Just existing in the same space as you put Jason’s head into a flurry, but in the most exciting way. The best part of his day has been visiting you these last few weeks. And of course, each time he’s entered your place he’s thought about removing the helmet and allowing you to get closer to him in a way he hasn’t let anyone in years. But each time, he’s stopped himself in fear. Fear of what exactly? Fear of putting you in danger, fear of scaring you, fear of disappointing you. Jason Tood would not be able to handle it if any of those things occurred. But there’s no time like the present, as they say. At least you didn’t flinch when you saw him. He couldn’t exactly figure out what you were thinking (whether it was positive or negative) but it wasn’t disgust he saw on your face, so a win is a win.
The black-haired man is suddenly overtaken with words and spits out without realizing, “I’m Jason, by the way.”
You freeze and look up at him questioningly. “I’m sorry?”
“My name, it’s Jason.”
“Oh! Okay, Jason…” You test the weight of his name on your tongue, “Jason, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” You conclude with a genuine smile.
Jason’s entire stomach has just done at least 20 flips. His heart is beating so hard and loud in his chest he hopes you don’t hear it. The man never knew a person could say his name so sweetly. He never knew his name could be uttered without any hint of malice by someone outside of his family. Your pronunciation of his name is echoing in his mind like bells to a dizzying effect. He’s been a fool. He’s been such an idiot. How could he let fear prevent him from lifting his helmet and telling you his name, when he could’ve been hearing the beautiful way you say it all this time? Jason realizes he’s left you verbally hanging for a good minute just staring, so he clears his throat and adverts his eyes. “The pleasure is all mine.” When Jason looks back at you, he sees your smile is still plastered on your face and it gives him a strange sense of pride.
“I want you to know though, I know the mask was probably a lot tonight. I don’t want to force you to say or give up anything for my sake, I’m the one treating you. I’m so glad you trust me enough with your face and name, but I don’t want you to think I need it to help you, Jason. I’d fix you up even if you came in here one day as a bat-Frankenstein.” You’re worried you might’ve pushed him too far tonight. You don’t want Ho—Jason, to think you’re only out to discover his secret identity. You want him to understand that you’d care for him no matter the circumstances, whether you knew his face and name or not.
All at once, Jason felt his throat close up and tears brimming his eyes. Do you know what your words mean to him? Do you know how instantly you make him feel loved? Jason is so certain he is undeserving of your kindness and understanding, but here you are giving it to him freely. Will you ever understand the effect you have on him? How you heal pieces of his soul he thought long shattered. Jason’s full, pink lips quiver into a small smile. A smile of profound gratitude, appreciation, and sadness.
“Angel, it’s long overdue. You’re right on one thing though, I do trust you. I trust you far more than my colleagues would probably advise, but I do so anyway because I can’t do anything else. I keep invading your life in sharp broken pieces and asking you to pick me up off the floor, even at risk of hurting yourself. Yet, you do it each time with a grace Shakespeare wishes he could write about. The fact I want you to understand is that; if I didn’t want you to see my face or know my name, you wouldn’t. End of story. But that’s not the case, so it isn’t the end of the story. You’re not pushing me. And to know that you’d fix me up even if I did end up a bat-Frankenstein, is some of the most relieving news I’ve had all month.” Jason had to end his monologue with a small tease, worried his vulnerability would be too obvious without it. You listen to his words with so much intent you’ve forgotten the rest of the world. An invisible hand is squeezing your heart to the point it hurts. You can only take shallow breaths and you feel as though you might tear up.
“Well then, let’s finish fixing you up.” Your words come out barely a whisper and you go back to tending to his wounds. But neither of you can ignore the change in the air. The swift shift into a heavy lull that keeps a smile on both of your faces. You realize you’ll be done treating him soon and a wave of panic rises in you. He can’t leave now, not after everything we just left unsaid. But he leaves every time I finish taking care of him, without wasting a second. Then, an idea comes to mind. One you’ve conjured up multiple times in the past but never really entertained because of its unlikeliness to occur. It’s a risk, for sure. It’s very possible you mess it up and ruin the evening, but things have gone smoothly thus far and the success has given you a boost in confidence. Plus, you are still majorly concerned for his health, so you brave the question once you’ve completed the last bandage.
“I’m done wrapping your injuries, but that in no way means you’re recovered. I know you’re probably anxious to get back to your safe house or whatever, but you’re a severe liability in your condition.”
“So what do you suggest?” Jason asks with a skeptically raised eyebrow.
“…Um well, I was going to offer —and it’s perfectly acceptable if you say no— but I was going to offer you stay over here for the night, to have somewhere to lie down without having to brave Gotham at night with a concussion and several broken ribs.” You refused to meet Jason’s eyes as you offered him to stay the night, so you missed how they widened in surprise and then lit with anticipation.
“Yeah that— um, I—” Jason coughed awkwardly, something you’ve never seen him do but find endearing, “I mean yeah, that’s probably a good idea. Not sure I could make it a block without collapsing. But you uh— you sure you don’t mind?” Jason’s voice softens in volume at the end of his query.
“I wouldn’t be offering if I did.”
“Fair point.” You smiled at his acceptance of your invitation, secretly giddy at the idea of him spending the night. “But um, I don’t really have anything for you to change into.”
“Understandable. I have my compression shorts on though so I’ll be fine.” Jason assures you and you nod your head. You then help him up off of the bathroom floor. Jason once again lays his arm around your shoulders for support and your stomach twists into knots. The two of you say nothing as you move toward your bedroom. Jason helps open the door with his free arm so you can shimmy your two bodies through the opening. Jason suddenly feels very awkward and misplaced inside. He’s never seen your room before, and to do so now feels so intimate it makes him light headed. This is the most personal space in your entire apartment and it is just now striking Jason that this is where he’ll be sleeping since you don’t have a guest room. Too lost in his racing thoughts, the vigilante doesn’t notice you’ve helped him to sit down on the edge of your bed. You reluctantly pull away from his grip around your shoulders to go turn on your bedside lamp, immediately feeling the absence of his body heat. Jason is pulled back into reality at the loss of contact and is hit with the need to say something but he searches for words with no avail.
It’s you who breaks the silence in a quiet but firm voice, instinctively not wanting to ruin the quiet air of the room. “You can sleep in here tonight. I’ll be in the living room if you need anything. If you get thirsty or hungry please help yourself to anything in my kitchen. The bedroom door locks too, just in case that’d make you more comfortable. Like I said though, if you need anything just come grab me, I’ll be on the couch.” You turn to leave him in privacy, but Jason quickly speaks up.
“You’re gonna sleep on the couch?” He asks incredulously.
“Well that is the only other option.” You affirmed with a raised eyebrow.
“No no no. It’s your house, you can sleep in your bed. I’ll take the couch.” Jason started to get up, but you could see him straining with each movement. You rushed over and gently but forcefully pushed him to sit back on the bed.
“Yeah, no. You are the one who’s severely injured, I’m not letting you sleep on a couch in your state. I really don’t mind anyways, it’s just one night.”
“Well I refuse to make you sleep on a couch in your own home, you already sacrifice enough just letting me in here.” You were about to protest his use of the word ‘sacrifice’ before Jason continued, with a suggestion that made you still. “We could… we could share the bed? I mean— it’s big enough for two people and we’re both apparently too stubborn to let the other one sleep in the living room.” Jason’s lake green eyes scanned your face for any sign of disgust or hesitation, his palms felt sweaty and he suddenly felt like an idiot for even suggesting such a thing.
You were frozen, the cogs turning in your head at the implications of his offer. Your heart was racing. The two of you sleep in the same bed? You had just learned his name, and now you two would be sharing a bed? You tried to stop yourself from feeling so excited at the idea. Jason took your silence for uncertainty and continued blabbering, “We’re both adults, right? I don’t mean anything by it, I just— I don’t want you getting a bad night's sleep on your couch, and your stubborn ass clearly won’t let me sleep anywhere that isn’t a real bed so… I don’t know, maybe it was a dumb suggestion. You can forget about it, I’ll take the couch—”
You interrupted him with a burst, shaking your hands in front of you to keep Jason from getting up. “Oh, no no no. It’s fine, it's fine. Really, it’s cool. We can— we can share the bed I don’t mind. It’s a smart idea. Just, ya know, be careful with your stitches and bandages. I’d hate for you to worsen any injuries in your sleep.” You tried to sound calm and collected, but really you were shaking with excitement and nerves. Jason just nodded slowly, still looking a little unsure at your agreement, but he moved to step out of his armor anyway.
You walked over to your side of the bed, and started fiddling with random nick nacks on your nightstand to try and appear busy while Jason got undressed behind you. Lord almighty, it was taking every ounce of your strength not to look behind you and oogle at what you knew were rippling muscles. “Focus, gotta get through this night without making a fool of yourself.” You thought as you felt the bed dip on the other side, signaling Jason was ready to sleep.
With that, you turned the lamp off and slipped underneath the covers. Jason copied you wordlessly and you both laid in the dark, staring at the ceiling in silence. The air was so thick with tension it was near suffocating, but the two of you were too scared to speak and break the spell of the night. You unconsciously let out a little sigh and turned on your side so your back was facing Jason. You closed your eyes to try and force yourself to sleep, but your mind was hyper vigilant at this point. You could feel the bed dipping to accommodate Jason’s gigantic form on the other side. You weren’t used to sharing this space with anyone, and the fact that you could feel his breath through the mattress had your mind in a frenzy. You were fighting every fiber of your being that was telling you —no, begging you to move closer to the man beside you.
Jason was pleading with the universe in hopes that you couldn’t hear how his heart was thundering in his chest. For someone who’s lying down, his breathing sure is quick. Jason thought this would be enough. Just having you near by, occupying the same space, he thought that’d be enough to satisfy his urge to be near you. But for some goddamn reason, it’s making it worse. How can you be so close yet so far? How much closer can he get before he crosses a line? Jason blames his exhaustion for his next move.
Out of nowhere, you feel something heavy curl around your waist. Your eyes pop open in surprise, and you have to force your body to be still. Jason uses the arm draped across your middle to pull you closer to him. Your back presses against his solid chest and you forget what it was ever like to be cold. You can feel warmth seeping into your skin from every point of contact between the two of you. You can feel each breath Jason takes pushing into your back and you can feel the speeding rhythm of his heart, which you’re sure is close to the speed of your own. Your lips have curled into a smile and you’re fighting off a sigh of contentment.
“Is—is this okay?” Jason’s question comes out in an unsure whisper. If you hadn’t been so close you wouldn’t have heard him.
“Yeah, this is okay.” You reassure at an equal volume, worried that being any louder would shatter the moment. Your smile has evolved into a full on grin.
“Okay.” Jason mutters and then presses his head into the curve of your neck. His muscular arm tightens around your waist and his hand grips your shirt gently. You subconsciously shuffle further into him, though, you didn’t think there was anyway you could physically get any closer. Still, any space left between the two of you was eliminated. Your two breaths became one as your heartbeats synced up. You could feel Jason’s warm breath against your neck and it sent shivers down your spine. Jason felt so warm and happy, here with you in his arms. Holding you felt like a reward he didn’t deserve. He only hopes he’ll be able to do this again…and again, and again, and again.
You’ve never felt so safe as you do in Jason’s arms. It’s almost euphoric, being like this with him. You never want this moment to end, but the warmth of Jason’s embrace is quickly dragging you under the spell of sleep. You hope you wake up with him in the morning, you hope this isn’t a dream. You two have probably crossed some sort of line tonight, not that either of you care right now. The unclear nature of your relationship with the vigilante is something for you to wrestle with in the morning. For now, you’ll fall asleep wrapped in Jason’s arms, with the happy thought that he’ll surely be coming back to do this again.
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lilyhyperfixates · 7 months
Text
I think he knows - B.B
Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x Reader
Wordcount: 0.7K
Warnings: Age gap (10 years, Benedict is 28, Reader is 18.) No Y/N used.
Authors note: Who was gonna tell me our boy Ben is 28 in S2??? I was flabbergasted when i googled it for this fic😭
The ball was absolutely boring to you. You were silently observing the people there and the conversations being held around you. The dance card that dangled from your wrist painfully empty, the small glass lemonade in your hand turning lukewarm from being held so long. Your eyes fall on Benedict Bridgerton, one of the most eligible bachelors of the season.
This social season was only your first, having been presented to Queen Charlotte only two weeks prior. You held no hopes of marrying this season. The gentlemen of the ton had not paid a lot of attention to you thus far, apart from the few dances you’d had.
Despite mr. Bridgerton being 10 years your senior, you felt yourself oddly enamored by him. You had just turned eighteen, only just allowed to be out in society. Regardless of your age you had gentlemen far into their forties approaching you for dances. The thought of mr. Bridgerton wanting to dance with you did not repulse you like it had with other gentlemen. Thinking about it even made your stomach flutter a little, not that you would ever admit that.
Benedict had been getting pestered by debutantes and marriage minded mama’s all evening. Since the ball was hosted by the dowager Viscountess, his mother, it was to be expected he would be approached all night, but in all honesty you pitied him a bit. He had been getting more and more attention each social season that he remained unmarried.
You had heard of Benedict Bridgerton before your debut, as he was an acquaintance of your father’s. Now at the ball you saw him in a completely different light though, not an acquaintance of your father, but a man you found quite attractive. You had always thought him an attractive man, but in the lighting of the sun setting and the stained glass windows from the ballroom he looked simply angelic.
Benedict and your father often painted together and you always found small excuses to be in the room, harboring a small crush on Benedict.
Suddenly you were pulled out of your thoughts when Lord Beswick approached you. Lord Beswick was a man in his late thirties with little to no hair on his head. He had seemed particularly eager to have you dance with him on earlier occasions, which was hard to refuse without seeming impudent. As the man approached you, you prepared yourself to have to dance with him again.
Then you feel a touch on the small of your back. Your head snaps around to find the source of the touch and your eyes meet those of Benedict Bridgerton. Lord Beswick then finally reaches you and asks you for your next dance.
"Unfortunately for you, the lady has already promised her next dance to me, Lord Beswick.” Benedict tells the man in a smooth and charismatic voice. You silently thank him with a look and allow him to write his name on your dance card. He quickly leads you to the dancefloor and gets ready to dance with you.
As the music starts playing Benedict begins dancing with you gracefully, he had obviously had dance lessons as a child. “Thank you for saving me from Lord Beswick.” You thank him, speaking softly, almost as if you were frightened to talk to him. Truthfully you were slightly scared to be talking to him, he was a bit intimidating to you.
“No need to thank me, I could not let a lady such as yourself dance with such a man.” Benedict states. His voice enhances your attraction towards him, it being crisp and confident. You had noticed before he always carried himself with confidence and grace. “I shall thank you for it regardless, I do not believe I would have survived another dance with him.” You utter out, still nervous to be in such close proximity to him.
You feel like he has got your heart skipping down sixteenth avenue, it almost beating out of your chest. He gives you a small smirk, looking down at you as you dance. “I have noticed you looking at me, Tonight and whenever your father and I paint at your estate. Is there any particular reason for that, my lady?” He asks, the smirk still lingering on his face.
I think he knows…
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alwaysonthemend · 1 month
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Author's Note: Inspired by this wonderful post. Thank you so much @tripthelightfandomtastic for some incredibly sexy dialogue and @edgingthedarkness for calling it to my attention 🤭
Word Count: 4k
Warnings: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. Jake x fem!reader / rough sex / sir kink / unprotected p in v sex / digital penetration / oral / brief overstimulation / use of gag / some name calling (brat, slut) / minor cock warming at the end / begging / possessiveness (nothing too major) / please let me know if I missed anything.
Apologies for any typos/ spelling mistakes.
Enjoy <3
~~~~~~~~~~~
“I think I need to sleep for at least 12 hours tonight.” Jake tells his twin, patting his pockets for his wallet to pay the bill. “I’m exhausted.” 
“Oh is that why you were being so pissy today?” Josh’s grin is smug as he finds his own wallet first and fishes his card out and tosses it onto the waiting bill before Jake can. “Makes sense.”
Jake’s eyes narrow and you fight a tiny smile, trying not to let your amusement show. Jake can be a little moody when he’s tired. And just… in general. 
“I’m the pissy one?” Jake counters, flicking Josh’s card off the bill and placing his own there instead. “I seem to be remembering things a little differently.” 
Jake’s tone is snarky – just a tiny bit more accusing than Josh’s had been. You already know that Jake had a… rough day today. He’d told you about it in the car – Josh had been demanding retake after retake and Sam had quote on quote, “disagreed with every fucking thing I said just for the hell of it.” In all honesty, knowing the Kiszkas, it had probably been all three of them being more difficult than necessary while Danny had to play mediator… Not that you’d said that to Jake. God, no. You’d only listened, allowing him to vent; nodded and frowned at the right moments. Clearly, tonight’s meal and a few drinks with Josh had done little to help Jake’s temper. 
Josh opens his mouth to retort but you interrupt. “I’m going to run to the restroom.” Both sets of matching eyes flash to you as you speak. Josh grins and Jake nods, sliding out of the booth to allow you to exit.  
In addition to his sour mood, Jake has been jittery the whole night. You’d noticed from the moment the two of you stepped into the bar that he had other things on his mind – whether it was a new song or riff or lyrics you couldn’t quite tell. But he was distracted. You know already how common it is that he grows restless, as if there’s so much energy buzzing beneath his skin that he’s hardly able to stand still. At first, it had almost been hard to be around when he got like this. His restlessness so palpable you could practically feel it coating your skin. At first, you would simply move to another room, allow him to sort himself out on his own. But after a little while, it became easier to tune him out – to still navigate around him when he gets like this. His aura has gravity of its own, you’ve come to discover. It’s hard to be apart from him for too long. 
He’ll deny it if you ask him if something is wrong. He’ll say he’s fine – that he’s not upset about today anymore and that he’s acting perfectly normal. So you don’t bother asking. Instead, you simply allow his energy to wash over you as you watch him interact with his twin at the booth. 
By the time you return, they seem to have momentarily put their little dispute on hold as they both turn to look at you as you approach the booth. 
“Are you ready, love?” Jake’s voice is smooth – neutral. Betraying nothing of the chaos that you know lies within. “We paid the bill while you were gone.” 
“Halfsies.” Josh supplies and Jake’s eyes cut to him for a moment before landing back on you. You nod, smiling at the two of them as they exit the booth in almost complete unison, each twin now holding himself in the exact same manner as the other as they prepare to leave. “It was nice actually getting to see you.” Josh continues as the three of you walk through the restaurant and to the door. “Jake always keeps you to himself when we’re home.”
Josh is teasing; you can tell by the slight dimple that has appeared on his left cheek as he speaks. But Jake tenses ever so slightly beside his twin as you all come to a stop on the sidewalk outside. The night air is warm – humid enough that it makes your skin feel sticky. The joys of a Tennessee summer. 
“He can be just a little selfish, I suppose.” You answer back, thinking nothing of it. But again, that energy around Jake seems to increase, his chocolate eyes flashing in the light spilling out into the air from inside the bar. 
“Am I not allowed to miss her when we leave?” Jake queries, slipping a heavy arm around your waist in such a way that it almost feels possessive. “Plus, I’m always stuck with you.” He says to his twin, grinning a little. “Who would blame me for wanting her to myself when we are home?”
Josh’s brow raises, a knowing glance shot towards you before he regards his twin. He senses Jake’s energy – the restlessness; senses that he could easily poke the bear and start a senseless argument that would no doubt descend into an actual fight. But he holds himself back, metaphorically biting his tongue as he gives Jake a little grin. 
“Can’t blame you at all, brother. Not at all.” His grin turns a little wicked. “But maybe you should share her more often – she was my friend first, afterall.”
So perhaps he hadn’t decided against poking the bear afterall. You fight the smile that threatens to overtake you, realizing that now might not be the time to pick sides by agreeing with Josh. He had been the one to know you first. He’d been the one to introduce you to Jake, even. But Jake needs no reminder of that little fact right now. 
“I see you plenty.” You offer, feeling the pointed squeeze of Jake’s fingers into your hip, “Plus, you constantly blow my phone up with texts. We talk plenty, Joshua.” 
Josh grins and shrugs his shoulders, looking pleased anyway. 
“Great seeing you.” Jake offers. “But I’m sick of you already.” 
Josh laughs, completely unaffected by his brother’s words. He’s used to it. He knows deep down Jake doesn’t mean them… too much.  
“Love you too, Jakey.” Josh grins at you – the exact same grin that Jake gave him just a moment ago. “Lovely to see you as always, Y/n. Hopefully someone lets me see you again before we leave.”
“I hope so, too.” You answer him, laughing just a little despite your best efforts.
Josh gives a theatrical sweeping bow before turning on his heel and disappearing to his Jeep, laughing the whole way. Jake scowls and tugs you away towards his own vehicle, that heavy arm still pointedly around your waist. 
He opens your door for you, a soft “Princess” leaving his lips as he dips his head a little. You grin and climb into the car and he closes the door behind you. 
Jake playing guitar is sinful. But Jake behind the wheel of a car? It’s downright indecent – something that no matter how many times you see it, it still gets you just a little. The thick muscles of his forearm twitch and move beneath his newly tan skin (thank you Europe tour) and the clench of his jaw as he watches the road has you clenching your thighs. To your credit, you only stare a little bit as he drives the two of you back to his house (His house, not yours. Something that once again feels pointed.) Neither of you speak much, the silence between the two of you just as comfortable as idle chit chat. Fleet Foxes flow softly from the speakers, filling the air between the two of you that seems to grow thicker and thicker with each passing moment. 
“See something you like?” 
You startle, eyes cutting up to see the curve of Jake’s lips as he continues staring out at the road ahead. Apparently you had been staring too much – enough for him to notice, anyway. Cheeks flushing, you shake your head in denial. 
“Just thinking.” 
His brow raises and it does nothing to quell the heat pooling in your lower belly.  “About?” He urges you on, tilting his head as if to hear you better.  You open your mouth to give a bullshit answer but he interrupts. “And don’t say work or the weather. I already know what you’re thinking.” Your jaw snaps shut. The fucker.  
“If you know, then why did you ask?” Your tone comes out a little brattier than you meant it to and Jake’s fingers tighten on the wheel. Seems that Josh isn’t the only one who’s going to poke the bear tonight. 
“Because I wanted to hear you say it.”
“Say what?”
A sharp exhale is the only evidence you have that Jake heard you. Refusing to give you a response, he flicks on the blinker to turn onto his street in a way that somehow seems snarky. It doesn’t take long before he’s pulling into his driveway and putting the car in park. Dark eyes turn to you, looking almost black in the dim light of the car. 
“Get out.” 
His tone leaves no space for arguing and you quickly unbuckle and stumble out of the car. Jake doesn’t wait on you – crossing the driveway to the front door in long strides, fishing for his key from his pocket. As you follow, you admire the broadness of his shoulders, the dominance within his gait alone, and yet another thrill of anticipation curls down your spine and settles between your thighs. He opens the door, not even sparing a glance backwards at you. He knows you’re following, knows you’ll follow him into the very depths of Hell if he asked. 
You expect him to pounce as the door closes. But instead, he merely slips his shoes off and places them neatly by the door. His keys and wallet are placed on the foyer table. Your shoes join his by the door. Then your purse on the hook. You walk deeper into the house, making your way into the kitchen – one eye on Jake as he moves about the space, orbiting you but not yet taking the step to touch you. It puts you on edge in an odd, delicious sort of way. He’s like a shark who’s scented blood; not yet going in for the kill, but instead waiting for the right moment to strike. You grab a glass from the cabinet and pour yourself a glass of water from the sink. The cool liquid doesn’t at all soothe the fire running through your veins. 
Not a second after you place the glass on the counter, you finally feel the heat of him pressing up against your back. His arms circle your waist and his lips hover over the sensitive skin of your ear. 
“I don’t mean to be so possessive.” He murmurs, his lips brushing against your skin. “Or pissy. ‘m sorry.” He mumbles, voice low. The heat in your belly simmers just a little, easing into something softer for a moment. 
“You have nothing to apologize for.” You answer him, tilting your head to the side as his kisses trail softly down your neck. 
Using his grip around your waist, Jake pulls you tighter against him. You tilt your head back towards him and he kisses you – soft but urgent. His hands caress your sides, your hips, then come up to cup your jaw as his tongue slips through your parted lips. He’s thorough, kissing you as if he’s savoring a meal. 
“Why are you being so sweet?” You’d been fully expecting a night of Jake using you to get all his frustration and energy out – an occurrence that you were more than looking forward to. His sweetness is a welcome surprise, though not at all how you saw this night going. 
He kisses along your jaw before seizing your earlobe between his teeth, nipping delicately before his mouth trails lower. His hips press into you and there’s no hiding the hard line of him in his pants, hot and pulsing against you. 
“I just want you to know how much I love you,” He whispers against your neck, giving you more kisses, “and how much I respect you,” another kiss. “because I'm gonna fuck you like I hate you.” 
All the air leaves your lungs and your heart feels like it might beat out of your chest. The earnestness and simplicity with which he utters such vulgarity is the sexiest thing you’ve ever experienced, leaving your brain empty of anything beyond your desire for him. But he’s taking too long now, his sweet kisses no longer enough and leaving you hollow and aching for him to fulfill the promise of his warning. The words slip out from your lips unbidden. 
“Why don’t you get the fuck on with it, then?”
His body goes rigid for one beat, maybe two, and then he spins you impossibly fast, a hand against your stomach, pressing you back into the wall. He captures your wrists with the other, holding them prisoner above your head. 
“Fuckin’ brat.” He groans against your mouth and the rough timbre of his voice floods your veins with a wave of primal need for him. “This is the thanks I get for trying to be sweet to you?” His shoulders are tense, the muscles taut with pent up energy and frustration. You aren’t sure what it is that’s got him in such a state but you want to replace it all with lust. You want him to take it out on you – to give you the overwhelming pleasure that you know he’s capable of delivering. “Well?”
“Fuck me.” You demand in lieu of answering him and his eyes seem to come alive as his nostrils flare at your tone. “Sir.” You add, the word dripping with sarcasm, making a mockery of the title that he’s more than earned in the bedroom. 
His breathing changes and there’s a war in his eyes that you’re determined to win. He leans down, his face only inches from yours. “I don't think you know what you’re asking for, Princess.” The nickname, the growl of his words rumbles up through his chest and every nerve ending in your body flares to life. 
His mouth collides with yours in a kiss – a rough, demanding thing as he plunges his tongue between your lips, seizing your mouth as his. Lust strokes down your spine and wetness floods your panties as he takes your ass in his hands and hauls you up against his hips. Your back presses into the wall as you use it for leverage to get closer to him. You lock your legs around his waist as your hands settle on his shoulders, the muscles quivering beneath your touch. 
Heat floods your body in an addictive rush, setting every inch of you aflame as his lips trail down the column of your throat, nipping and biting as he goes. But they aren’t gentle as they had been before – no, the sting of his teeth lets you know that your neck will be a mess in the morning, a painting of swirling purples and reds that will stand as testament to how far you pushed him tonight. The hedonistic, lecherous part of you is only excited further by the thought.
With your legs still wrapped around his waist, Jake walks backwards and turns you. Before you can even open your mouth to ask him where he’s going, your back hits the kitchen table. He hadn’t used as much force as you know he could have, but Jake had placed you hard enough onto the wooden surface that the breath in your lungs freezes for a moment as you glance up at his looming figure above you. He presses in close, roughly gripping your knees and shoving them apart so that he can walk forward and take up the space between them. 
“Hands above your head.” The words are rough – more of a growl than anything and you instantly comply, suddenly feeling unable to do anything other than what he asks of you. His fingers trail down your torso, his touch searing your skin even through the fabric of your blouse. His fingers trail underneath, slipping up your stomach and then behind your back. He tugs the blouse off you and onto the floor. With impressive skill, he then unhooks your bra behind your back and tosses it away as well, eyes now trained on the hard peaks of your nipples as you lay there exposed for him. He pauses, as if drinking in the sight of you, and impatience has you speaking before thinking once again. 
“You just going to stand there and stare?” As soon as the question leaves your mouth you know that you’ve really done it now. Jake’s gaze turns wicked, his grin devilish, as he shakes his head at you. 
“Y’know you’re lucky,” He begins, stepping back from you and unbuckling his belt. His fingers work slowly to pull it from his belt loops. When he at last gets it free, he reaches down and grips your hands where they rest obediently above your head, “that you’re so pretty. Otherwise I wouldn’t put up with that fucking mouth of yours.” Slowly, teasingly, he wraps the leather of his belt around your wrists and then cinches it tight, securing your wrists tightly together and then placing them back down onto the table above your head. 
Your body tingles with sinful pleasure and excitement at the feeling of being bound, at being kept where he wants you. Despite your mouth saying things before you can think them through, you desperately want to please the man above you. You want to worship him, to give him anything and everything he could ever ask of you. You begin to respond to him but he silences you with a heavy hand over your mouth. 
“Careful, Princess. Before I make you shut up with my cock, yeah?” Eyes wide, you nod and Jake lifts his hand with a satisfied nod. “What do you say to me?”
“Yes sir.” The words are shaky, thick with lust. It takes all your focus to make your brain form the words, to make your lips form the correct sounds. You can hardly think beyond the lust swirling inside your head. 
Jake doesn’t reward you with praise for your compliance as he normally would and disappointment trickles through you for the briefest of moments. But then his mouth is on your nipple, his fingers digging into your hips to hold you still. He bites down and you whimper, core pulsing as his tongue swirls around the hard bud to soothe the sting. Then he’s trailing lower, searing kisses working their way down your belly until he reaches the waistband of your skirt. Jake bunches the fabric up around your hips, exposing your damp panties for him to admire. You wish desperately that he would take the damn skirt off completely but you know that you’re in no position to be making requests. 
“Look at you.” His words are honey sweet, dripping with thinly veiled desire. You can feel his hot breath on your clothed heat, his white teeth flashing as he grins up at you smugly. “You’ve ruined these poor things, haven’t you?”
You whimper as he trails the pad of his finger over your clothed clit, causing your hips to jump up towards his hand. Jake hooks his fingers in your panties with his left hand, shoving the fabric to the side – clearly unwilling to even take the time to pull them all the way off you. Then his other hand is hovering over your center, fingers running through your slick as he hums in approval. Without any more warning, he plunges a finger inside of you, curling upwards deliciously and instantly finding that spot inside of you that drives you crazy. 
You cry out, back arching up off the wooden table. Your hands lift up off the table and then slam back downwards, anything else feeling uncomfortable thanks to Jake’s belt keeping them bound.
“So responsive.” Jake shows no mercy, quickly sinking another finger inside of you. Distantly, your foggy mind realizes that – even though he promised to fuck you like he hates you, you know that he would never do anything without properly prepping you first. If you were able to focus on anything other than his fingers, you might have thanked him. Instead, all you can do is moan as he works you masterfully with his fingers. 
“Jake.” You plead as he abuses your sweet spot over and over, keeping you hovering over the edge of release. “Jake, please.” You beg again as he gives no indication that he’s heard you other than grinning devilishly. “Jake, I can’t- I need-” The words won’t form right no matter how hard you try, the agonizing pleasure proving to be too much. 
“I know exactly what you need.” Jake answers darkly, “But you’re not asking nicely, are you?”
Eyes clenched shut, you shake your head frantically. “Please, sir?” You try instead, hips bucking forward to try and find some sort of friction. “Please make me cum? Please, please, sir.” Even to your own ears you sound pathetic but you can’t be bothered to care. All you can think about is how badly you need to cum, how incredible his fingers feel. All you can think about is Jake. “Sir, please-” 
“Enough.” Jake’s fingers leave you, and you whimper loudly in protest. But you’re silenced as Jake suddenly tugs even harder on your panties. The fabric digs harshly into your skin, and then you hear the sound of fabric tearing. Jake rips them from you, and then he’s shoving the ruined fabric into your gaping mouth, silencing you as the taste of your own arousal floods your tongue. Wide-eyed, all you can do is stare at him. 
Jake, looking entirely too smug and pleased with himself, eases his fingers back into your aching cunt and has you back to the edge in mere seconds, your whimpers and cries muffled by the panties shoved between your lips. Finally, Jake’s mouth descends onto your clit, his fingers never once slowing or faltering as he sucks your clit mercilessly. Your orgasm swoops in – quick, overwhelming, the pleasure white hot as it rocks through your body. Muscles quivering, you scream through your make-shift gag as Jake moans into your pussy, his eyes closing as if the taste of you is a gourmet meal. 
When at last he pulls away, you're left there in a daze – aching for more of him already. Clearly just as desperate to feel you fully, Jake grips your hips and brings your ass to the edge of the table. With impressive speed Jake rips his shirt off over his head and then even quicker has his trousers off and discarded to the floor.
His cock – achingly hard and the head glistening with precum, has your mouth watering. He steps between your legs once more and instinctively your legs wrap around his waist, bringing your slick pussy to rsst his beautiful cock. Jake hikes your skirt up higher to your belly and then his left hand finds your hip – his grip bruising. Gripping his length in the other, Jake runs his cock through your folds, gathering your slick before nudging the blunt head against your entrance. 
“Fuckin’ take it.” He growls, sheathing himself fully inside of you at last. Jake groans deeply and you moan the best you can through your gag. Giving you no time at all to adjust, Jake’s pace is immediately brutal. After three hard thrusts, his cock brushing against your sweet spot each time thanks to the angle of your hips, the sting of him quickly bleeds into pleasure. The table creaks and groans beneath you, the legs screeching against the kitchen floor as Jake pounds into you.
"Such a slut." Jake groans, but somehow he makes the word seem like a compliment. The wet squelching sound coming from between your legs would be embrassing if Jake didn't look like he could fall apart already. "You like it when I treat you like this?"
You nod frantically in answer, loving every second and still wanting more.
"'Course you do." The words escape through gritted teeth, his voice shaky despite the hard persona he's putting on. "Shit, Y/n."
Jake’s gaze falls down between the two of you, eyes trained on where he moves in and out of you, his skin growing shiny with sweat. His hair sticks to his temples and the side of his neck, his necklaces swinging and clinking in the air between the two of you. “Look so fucking good stretched around my cock.” 
You can’t answer, the feel of him moving inside of you too perfect to think of anything else. Jake’s hips slap against yours, his impressive stamina allowing his pace to remain fast, mercilessly, without faltering for even a second. It doesn’t take long for the heat simmering in your lower belly to rise, your body plummeting once again, head first, towards your second orgasm. Jake’s mouth is open, his brows furrowing as his own release draws nearer and nearer. His hand reaches up and pulls your ruined panties from your mouth at last and instantly your cries – once muffled, echo throughout the room along with the sound of Jake’s skin slapping against yours.  
“Say my name when you cum.” Jake orders, his thumb finding your clit and circling the swollen bud. His touch isn’t gentle – the pace just as brutal as the pace of his hips slamming into yours. Your orgasm hits you like a freight train and you scream Jake’s name, the muscles in your body convulsing violently. 
“Oh fuck. Fuck, Y/n.” Jake’s pace finally begins to falter as your walls clench around him. Jake’s left hand braces against the edge of the table, his knuckles turning white from the force of his grip. A litany of curses and groans fills the air as Jake spills inside of you, the feeling of his hot release making your eyes roll back. Your body burns with pleasure – pleasure that is dangerously close to bleeding into hot agony from overstimulation. 
Finally, Jake stills, his cock softening inside of you as he breathes out shakily, one hand coming up to wipe the sweat from his forehead. Still staying inside of you, the feeling of him there somehow comforting, Jake reaches up and unbinds your wrists. He brings each one to his lips in turn, kissing the red skin where the leather had been digging into you. 
“I love you.” He offers, his brown eyes now regarding you with a soft, almost sympathetic look. “My princess.” His fingers gently trace over your lips, his touch reverent.
“Love you more.” You murmur tiredly,
“Impossible.”
<fin>
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silkythewriter · 8 months
Note
Hello! New anon here, um, so we have the headcanons for Vox x extravert reader. But what are your headcanons for Vox x introvert reader?
Got me curious :3
Vox x introvert reader!
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Warnings!: Non!
Fandom!:Hazbin hotel!
Author note!: AH I WAS WAITING FOR SOMETHING LIKE THIS (≧▽≦) TYSM FOR REQUESTING THIS! Hazbin hotel has my mind running and my hyperfixation on this show is actually wild. IM SO GREATFUL FOR ALL THE REQUESTS TRUELY
Summary!: Vox with a introverted reader!
❤️Written by silkythewriter Do not steal or repost on any other platform please! <3❤️
꧁𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹꧂
꧁𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹꧂
★📺✨!Vox!✨📺★
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First things first, he always makes sure the paparazzi’s back off. Being with one of the more popular and powerful overloads is definitely going to come with some press!. But don’t worry you’ll little head off he can always just zap the equipment or threaten them.
As the show shows us he’s one little show off! But as much as he’d love to show what’s his and who’s he’s with he’d keep it private if your uncomfortable with the sudden spot light.
Depending on your personality behind closed doors, like if your more on the calmer side, or on the but more ecstatic side, it will determine what he prefers to do with you!
If your on the calmer he’d love to wind down in your arms and just lay for a bit! Maybe put on the latest news. Or show you the good press he’s getting for his latest invention. He likes having someone to listen like actually listen as much as he likes having power and using it to scare people. It does effect his daily conversation with people since they want to get one his bad side, so he adores the calm conversations with you! Even if your more a listener then a talker.
Now if you were more on the hyper side behind closed doors, he’s gonna be so confused. Where was all this energy when you guys were in the building?! ヘ(° □°)ヘ!!
Once you explain your a bit more introverted in-front of people you don’t know. Which he has to admit he gets it to a degree.
Most of the time he handles any social interaction and takes the lead if someone approaches you not that he’s jelly of them or anything! Yk that meme where it’s like
“They said no pickles” that’s quite literally you and him
Sometimes holds your hand or links pinky’s with you if your ever feeling a bit overwhelmed by all the workers in the building, or the camera shoved into your face. He hates seeing so stress so he dose his best to figure something out, which he always does!
If your not a busy demon like him and are just with him for most of the day which he will admit in secret he absolutely loves he has your own little space in the three Vs building for you to chill out and not get interrupted. He filled it with whatever you said you’d like, even stuff you didn’t tell him… weird…(💧゜^゜)
Sometimes teases you, just because he doesn’t like seeing you upset doesn’t mean he’s gonna let you get away that easy!
Like one time him you and the two other Vs were ordering over phone and rang up the place. Before handing you the phone hurriedly as they picked up making you stammer and stumble over your words from surprise. He cracked up over this, now your always alert when he has a phone around you…
He’s devious, sometimes he makes you go up and ask for straws or something you always end up getting a bit freaked out only for him to laugh as he calls the waiter himself and does it. Yea he’s foul.. -_-
On the brighter note! He always with you in a second if your having trouble with a person and are to nervous to speak up. He dosent mind doin it for you!
Makes you steer clear of the other Val and velvet, their chatter boxes, also he just prefers you to not have to talk to them.
Sometimes he basks in the pure knowledge that your more comfortable with him then others
Overall! He does tease!, he loves the expressions you make!, but in all honesty even with his personality and attuned he’s a sweetheart! Does whatever makes you uncomfortable for you!, he’s a gentleman after all.
꧁𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹𖦹꧂
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AHHHH TYSM FOR REQUESTING!!! I LOVED WRITING THIS AND I LOVE SEEING WHAT I CNA DO WITH CONTRASTING HEADCANONS LIKE THESE I HOPE YOU LIKE IT! ☆ ~('▽^人)
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eiightysixbaby · 1 year
Text
afterglow
part 2 to cruel summer
tell me that i’m all you want, even when i break your heart
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word count: 10.2k
pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader
summary: you navigate the aftermath of your confession to eddie, but forgetting him is harder than you thought. it’s up to him to make things right.
cw: 18+ ONLY - MINORS DNI. angst, use of y/n, eddie and reader being lovesick for each other, tooth rotting fluff, use of pet names, unprotected p in v, oral f receiving
author’s note: i am so, SO beyond excited to share this finally! thank y’all so much for the love on cruel summer, i hope you all enjoy part 2 just as much. this is inspired by afterglow by miss taylor swift, so go listen to that if you haven’t! okay smooches love u all hope u enjoy
part one
It had only been a few days since you confessed your love to Eddie and he left you without a word, but it felt like it had been years. Every minute crawling by, the hole in your heart seeming to grow rather than get any smaller. Your mind was ping-ponging back and forth between being furious with Eddie, and missing him and yearning for his touch. In all honesty, you mostly felt horrible for the way you yelled at him. Sure, he wasn’t being considerate of your feelings and he was being a bit of an asshole, but how was he supposed to know you loved him? You don’t even know if you knew you did until you were screaming it in his face. It’s not right what Eddie did, making you feel special and then turning around and flirting with other girls in front of you, but it’s not right for you to get mad at him for not being exclusive with you when the two of you were only supposed to be fuck buddies, and you weren’t supposed to have feelings for him. The guilt was eating away at you, and now that you’d gone and blindsided him with the confession of your feelings, you knew you couldn’t fix things. He clearly didn’t feel the same way, and he clearly didn’t want to rectify the situation at hand. But there were also moments where the guilt would subside and you were filled with pure rage, wanting to hurt him the way he’d hurt you. To say you were conflicted was an understatement.
In actuality, Eddie was doing no better than you were. He’d barely slept since the night he left your place, the bags under his eyes growing increasingly dark and his mood constantly agitated. You loved him. How could that be? Had he really been that fucking blind? Admittedly, Eddie’s never been great with the whole “feelings” thing. Screwing around with a different girl every week was fun for him because no deeper feelings were involved. It allowed him to get those brief dopamine rushes without the room to get attached to someone, just for them to end up leaving him when they really got to know him. But it was always different with you, from the moment the first line was blurred and you crossed into uncharted territory with each other, it was different. This had unnerved Eddie initially, the way everything felt softer with you, more intimate. He couldn’t let himself fall for you, and so he kept you at arm’s length - or tried to, anyways. He’d continue to flirt with other girls, to sleep with other girls in hopes that it would keep his mind off of you. He needed to keep himself in the routine of bouncing around so that his brain wasn’t hyper fixated on you. Your mutual agreement to have a little friends-with-benefits situation surely meant that you didn’t feel anything more for him, right? He couldn’t be the one that fell head over heels for you, just for you to leave him in the dust.
He should have fucking known you’d never do that to him. And now here he was, the asshole that hurt you probably beyond repair. All because he couldn’t work out his feelings, couldn’t face you in the event that you rejected him. He scoffs at himself, because look at how he handled things, leaving your apartment without so much as a word after you confessed your fucking love to him. Eddie groans, flopping face first into his pillows, letting out a long exasperated sigh. The moment you said you loved him he’d wanted to say it back without an ounce of hesitation, and honestly, that terrified him to his core. He’s never loved someone like that, it’s different than the love he holds for his friends or Wayne, or that old trailer park cat he’d befriended as a child . The love he felt for you was all-consuming in a new way, and it made him sick to his stomach with unease. He’s startled by a knock rattling the trailer, and he heaves himself off his bed with a huff. A frown is etched onto his face, his hair a wild mess as he opens the rickety door to the trailer. There on his front step is Nancy and Jonathan. Oh fuck.
“-And so, we just kind of want to know a little bit about what happened, on your end? She didn’t really give us a whole lot to go off of other than you flirting with the bartender…” Nancy winces as she says the last part, noticing the way Eddie visibly twitches at her words.
“I wasn’t flirting with the bartender,” Eddie says through gritted teeth, trying to keep his cool. “I didn’t want to start anything so I just… let her flirt with me. But I wasn’t interested! I just wanted one more drink,” he mumbles, his head throbbing with stress and lack of sleep.
Nancy and Jonathan had come over to your place the day after the incident with Eddie, gently trying to coax some information out of you. You’d revealed that the two of you had had a few drinks and some bar food, danced a little bit, and then hooked up in the bathroom - sparing them the gory details of course. Then you told them you caught him flirting with a couple women at the bar after you’d left him to talk to Chrissy briefly. You intentionally left out the part where you, you know, professed your undying love for him in the middle of the night standing in the doorway to your apartment. You didn’t need anyone knowing that you said those three big words when he didn’t even reciprocate them, the thought of telling your friends far too embarrassing.
Nancy, being Nancy, felt like there was something you weren’t telling her, or at least wanted to hear the story from Eddie’s perspective, hoping to get some more info so that she could better understand how to be there for you. She gave it a few days, knowing Eddie wouldn’t like to be cornered right after the incident, and that’s how her and Jonathan found themselves on the couch in his small living room currently.
Eddie was also in no way planning on telling them about how you’d told him you loved him, and he’d walked away like a big fucking idiot. Although his friends meant well, and wanted to help, he didn’t need any extra inquiring minds knowing about this. He needed to focus on figuring out how to fix things with you before anyone else found out that the big ‘L’ word was involved.
“Eddie, please just be honest with us-”
“I am being fucking honest!” Eddie snaps, catching his friends off guard. “I swear, on my fucking life, I was not flirting with those women at the bar. I just didn’t have the energy to start an argument or something,” the expression on Eddie’s face is growing desperate as he talks. “I should’ve just walked away, I know, but I didn’t. But I swear I was not flirting with them. For once, I wasn’t trying to be an asshole.”
Jonathan gives Nancy a look, and she nods in understanding.
“We believe you, Eddie. Thank you for explaining,” she says softly, trying to meet his eyes.
Eddie doesn’t look at her, can’t bring himself to when he’s hiding the worst part of this whole thing from her.
“Is there… anything else that you need to tell us?” Jonathan asks, careful so as not to sound accusatory.
“No. After she thought she caught me flirting, that must’ve been when she called you guys. There’s nothing else to say that she didn’t already tell you.” Eddie sighs, his voice defeated.
They could tell their presence was no longer wanted in Eddie’s home, and so they made their exit.
“Thanks for talking to us, Eddie. We’re here if you need anything,” Nancy says as she closes the door behind her.
Nancy originally intended on ripping Eddie a new one when he admitted to flirting with the bartender a few days ago, but now she knows that’s clearly not the truth. It was all a misunderstanding, at least this time around. But the hurt behind Eddie’s eyes, the pain in his voice has her thoughts jumbled. Something deeper has to be going on, she just doesn’t know what.
“So, do you think we should tell Y/N that him flirting with the ladies at the bar was a misunderstanding?” Jonathan asks, breaking the silence in the car.
“I feel like she deserves to know. Not that it’ll change anything necessarily, it doesn’t have to, but she deserves to be free of that pain at least,” Nancy nods as if assuring herself, before taking the car in the direction of your place.
The rapping at your door breaks you out of your daze as you sit on your sofa watching Friends reruns. You debate even answering it, before deciding that you can’t wallow all alone 24/7. You open your door to reveal Nancy and Jonathan, inviting them in but grimacing at the disastrous state of your living room. They don’t even pay any mind to it, Jonathan sitting on the arm of the couch as Nancy stands in front of you.
“So, we just talked to Eddie,” she says, her eyes searching yours.
You swallow, hard. Did he tell them what you said? Do they know you love him?
“Oh? W-what did he say?” you ask, your voice coming out more shaky than you would’ve liked.
“He told us that he was never flirting with the bartender and the other girl. Insisted on it, actually. He said he just wanted one more drink while he waited for you, and didn’t feel like starting anything by turning them down,” she says gently. “I’m not telling you this to make you feel bad for him or anything, I just figured you deserve to have that weight off of your shoulders.”
You stay silent for a moment, taking in what she’s saying. Clearly Eddie was convincing when he told her all of this, because Nancy wouldn’t believe just anything. He wasn’t flirting with them, it was all a misunderstanding. You flipped out on him for nothing.
“Thank you for telling me,” you say finally. “Did he say anything else?”
“No, his story was no different than yours otherwise.”
You nod, standing in silence because you can’t think of a damn thing to say.
“We’re gonna get going, but I just wanted to give you that update,” Nancy says, sensing the awkwardness.
You thank them again and hug them both before shutting the door behind them. You sink back into the soft cushions of your couch, staring blankly at the TV screen. The whole reason you’d even admitted to Eddie that you loved him was because you blew up on him, you couldn’t take it anymore, the image of the bartender all over him bringing you to your breaking point. It was all a misunderstanding, and you spilled your guts to him because of it. Things could still be the way they were if you’d never opened your damn mouth. Clearly, Eddie doesn’t love you back. He hasn’t reached out to you in three days. There’s no way you can go back on your words now, and you’re confident you ruined everything with the only guy you want. It should make you sick, still, the fact that he left you and couldn’t even give you a response. You should be furious with him, you should be cursing his name at the sky, but all you can do is feel guilty for putting him in jail for something he never did. You lay down, letting out a scream into one of your fluffy throw pillows. If you had any tears left to cry, they’d surely be flowing now, but instead you just lie there, zoning out completely. The only thing left to do was try and get over Eddie Munson.
Almost two whole weeks since he last saw you and Eddie had been wallowing pathetically the whole time, making little to no improvements since Nancy and Jonathan’s visit to his home. He shouldn’t have gotten so defensive with you when you accused him of flirting with the ladies at the bar - how could he blame you for thinking that? It’s not like he was particularly loyal to you or considerate of your feelings any other time. Basically, he was throwing himself a gigantic pity party, and Steve had decided he’d had enough of his friend’s antics.
He found out a little about what had happened through Robin, who found out through Nancy. Word travels fast in the friend group, needless to say. Steve came to Eddie’s trailer, for the third time that week, still finding him withering away in bed and looking like a kicked puppy. Steve, from what he understood of the situation, couldn’t figure out why Eddie was so distraught. You’d finally gotten tired of his sleeping around, and you’d kicked him to the curb. If anything, you deserved to be upset because you clearly had some deeper feelings for Eddie. Eddie on the other hand? He was the asshole, always, what right did he have to be upset now?
“Ed, seriously man, you’ve gotta cut this out. What good is it gonna do for you if you let yourself shrivel up and die in your bed?” Steve had tried to be gentle the first time he came to see Eddie, but by now he was frustrated.
Eddie just groans, grabbing his pillow and covering his face with it. Steve rolls his eyes, marching over to the bed and snatching the pillow from him, like a parent snatching an item from a child.
“You’ve gotta talk to me, dude. What is going on here? You acted like an ass to Y/N half the time, no offense, and now you’re upset? I just don’t buy it, man.”
Eddie scoffs and gets up, pushing past Steve and heading into the kitchen to get himself a cup of coffee. Steve follows directly behind him, hands on his hips as he corners Eddie in the kitchen. The older man glances over at his friend, acting completely disinterested as he fills his Garfield mug with the black liquid.
“You’re being impossible. I want to help you, and you won’t even talk to me. If you want to be depressed as shit forever, then fine! Be my guest,” Steve says, like it’s final, like he’s done trying.
Eddie knows him better than that. He pushes past Steve yet again, plopping himself down on the couch and taking an obnoxiously loud sip of his coffee. Steve’s fuming, watching in disbelief as Eddie goes along like he isn’t even there.
“You know, I can see why Y/N got sick of you.”
This gets a rise out of Eddie. He brings the mug away from his lips slowly, his breath catching in his throat.
“Yeah, I mean seriously, if you’re this stubborn all the time then it’s no wonder she got tired of you…” Steve goes on, knowing exactly what he’s doing.
Eddie grips his mug tightly, certain it’d shatter if he held it any harder. He grits his teeth, breathing hard out his nose.
“You just couldn’t keep it in your pants, had to flirt with that damn bartender…”
“I DIDNT. FLIRT. with the FUCKING. BARTENDER.” Eddie is seething now, about ready to jump across the room and grab Steve by the collar of his shirt. He’s at his breaking point now, letting everything spill out of him. “You wanna know what’s going on? You really have to know? She fucking loves me, man. She told me she loves me, okay? And - and - and… that fucking terrified me, okay? So I left her apartment. I didn’t say a word and I fucking left,” Eddie’s trembling now, the brunt of his anger giving way to sheer anguish.
Steve goes quiet, his eyes widening. He opens and closes his mouth, scrambling to find words.
“Eddie, you just left her?” Steve asks, really not trying to rub salt in the wound, but what the fuck.
“I really don’t need you to lecture me on how wrong that was-”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. That’s not what I’m trying to do. I just-” Steve pauses, looking at his disheveled friend where he sits on the couch. “Do you love her?”
Eddie is silent for a minute, his hands clasped together and brought up to his mouth, elbows resting on his knees.
“Yeah. Yeah, I think I do,” his voice is noticeably shaky, and for the first time since Steve got here, Eddie’s sad brown eyes meet his.
Steve comes to sit down next to Eddie, the couch cushions dipping with his weight.
“I think you need to tell her, man.”
“How? How do I even start? She thinks I ditched her at The Hideaway to flirt with other women, she probably thinks I fucking hate her considering I left without a word after she-”
Steve puts a hand on Eddie’s shoulder, calming him down from the way his body has started to shake. Eddie looks at him, eyes glassy and confused.
“This is Y/N we’re talking about. I don’t think she could ever hate you. You need to tell her how you feel, Eddie.”
Eddie knows he’s right. Deep down, he knows. But facing you and admitting his feelings is the scariest part. He doesn’t like to be vulnerable, doesn’t like the way it feels to put himself so fully out there, and he honestly envies you for being able to spit the words at him so easily. Eddie has to tell you, he just needs to figure out how.
You stood in front of the mirror in your bedroom, holding up different outfits as you debated which you liked the best. Robin and Nancy scrunched their noses at one particular dress you held up.
“Too many ruffles,” Nancy blurts.
“You’d look kind of like a babydoll…” Robin muses, tilting her head as she looks at the short blue garment.
You groan, throwing all the hangers of clothes onto your floor.
“Guys, I have to wear something tonight and we’ve gone through, like, half of my wardrobe!” you hold your hands out at your sides, your voice incredibly whiny as you plead with your friends.
“Okay, okay, let me take a look,” Nancy says, getting up and searching through your ransacked closet.
You were going on a date tonight. Nancy had eventually squeezed the confession out of you that you loved Eddie, but you still hadn’t informed her that you actually told him that and that he left. It had now been two weeks since you’d spoken to Eddie and she kept telling you you needed to actively try and forget him. Because, big surprise, sitting alone in your apartment all day eating pints of ice cream clearly wasn’t helping - much to your dismay. So she took it upon herself to help and set you up on a date with a friend of Jonathan’s.
According to his Instagram profile, he was cute, and he seemed like a nice guy based on everything Nancy told you. He went by Argyle, which, a little weird, but hey - you just told your fuck buddy you loved him and he walked out so… you’re not really in a position to judge anyone for anything.
“Ooh! What about this?” Nancy holds up a hanger with a tight black faux-leather skirt and another with a shimmery silver top.
“Nance - they’re going to get ice cream, not to a strip club,” Robin chides, laying on your bed and flipping through a magazine.
“Okay, fine, but I’m borrowing this skirt,” she says, meeting your eyes to get your approval.
You roll your eyes, scrutinizing one strand of hair that won’t do what you want it to do as Nancy continues looking through your clothes.
“Okay! I’ve got it. This is casual, but not so casual that it says you don’t care,” she eyes her selections as she waits for you and Robin to weigh in.
She’s holding a pair of light wash denim shorts, embroidered with little daisies, and a baby pink top with ruched sleeves.
Robin bites her lip excitedly, nodding eagerly at you.
“Not my taste, but totally, absolutely, one hundred perfect for you. Put it on, put it on!” she urges.
You laugh, obliging and changing into the clothes Nancy picked. She has a good eye, you had to admit. The outfit was perfect, cute and expressed that you’d put effort into your appearance, but not overdoing it. As you look at yourself in your mirror, you can’t help but picture Eddie’s face if he saw you in that outfit. His arm snaking around your waist to pull you close. Your fingers trail down to the hem of the shorts, toying with a loose string.
“Hey, earth to Y/N?” Robin waves her hand, snagging your attention. “You still with us? Argyle’s definitely gonna need you alive for the date tonight,” she says lightheartedly, giving you a lopsided smile.
Your lips had fallen into an involuntary frown, and of course the girls catch it immediately.
“Don’t think about him, hun,” Nancy places a hand on your arm, giving you a gentle squeeze. “Argyle’s a great guy, and you’re gonna have fun tonight!”
“Yeah, no you’re right. I’m sorry. I want to give him a chance, I’m excited,” you smile, trying your best to shove the curly brunette metal head out of your mind.
It’s not that you weren’t excited for the date, you really were. Maybe a change of scenery and a new person were exactly the things you needed. But you still felt horrible about setting everything on fire with Eddie, leaving you to sift through the ashes now that the damage was done. And you still love him. The thought wafts through your mind like a bad stench through your nose, and you shake your head as if to rid your brain of it. Screw Eddie, you try and tell yourself. Who needs him anyway?
Just as Nancy finishes applying a healthy amount of makeup to your face, there’s a knock at your door. Like an absolute gentleman, Argyle arrives right on time. You feel wings erupt in your stomach, birds taking flight as your nerves kick in.
Robin notices you go rigid in her gaze.
“You’re gonna be fine. You’re gonna have a great time, you got this, kid,” she beams at you, giving you an affirming nod.
You try your best to give a confident smile back, nodding once in confirmation that you do, in fact, have this. The girls shuffle you out of your room and towards the door, practically shoving you to go answer it. Your straighten yourself, taking one last deep breath before swinging the door open.
“Well, good evening, ladies,” Argyle says, flashing his shiny white teeth as he smiles at you and your friends who stand modestly behind you.
“You must be Y/N. I’m Argyle, it’s so nice to meet you,” he keeps the smile on his face, reaching a hand out to shake yours.
“It’s nice to finally meet you, too,” you smile back, taking his hand firmly as you shake it.
“Mind if I steal her away, girls?” he jokes, directing the question at Robin and Nancy.
“Nope! Not at allllllll,” Robin draws out the last syllable, giving you a flirtatious wave.
“She’s all yours! Have fun you two,” Nancy smiles.
They give you a thumbs up when you take one last glance over your shoulder, Argyle leading the way out the door. And so it begins.
Tonight is the night. Tonight is the night Eddie is going to fix shit with you, or at least give an honest attempt. The thought of going through with his plan made him want to genuinely hurl, but he swallowed the bile that rose to his throat and was determined to right this wrong. After letting the truth spill to Steve, the only thing consuming his thoughts has been telling you about how he feels. The entirety of the past night was spent tossing and turning in his bed, fleeting dreams of you rejecting him flashing through his subconscious. His plan, as it currently stands, is as follows: he’s going to swing by the flower shop to get you a beautiful bouquet, and then head over to the local ice cream place to get you your favorite milkshake. Then he plans to show up at your door with his offerings, and apologize profusely. Like, he’s talking begging-on-his-knees, praying to the gods above, apologize. He stomach lurches as he mentally walks through the plan again, getting himself looking presentable for the evening ahead. He knows very, very well that there’s a huge chance this doesn’t go well for him. He knows you might just go ahead and rip the damn milkshake out of his clammy palms and throw it right back in his face, or maybe even throw a punch or two - hell, he deserves it. He’s not asking for forgiveness, he’s not asking for you to welcome him back in with open arms. He just knows that he won’t be able to rest well until he’s told you the truth, he has to apologize and be honest with you, whether you accept him back in or not.
Eddie gives himself a once, twice, three times over in the mirror, although his current attire isn’t much different from his usual. He’s still in his ripped black jeans, his surprisingly white Reeboks, and all of his chains and rings. Instead, though, he’s traded his usual band tee or denim vest with a black button-down shirt. He takes a deep breath, trying desperately to calm his nerves. He’d already smoked, hoping the high would ease his worries, to no avail. He’s not used to being nervous like this, not used to second-guessing his appearance or feeling his palms grow sweaty. He’s used to women throwing themselves at him, he’s used to one-night stands with no big feelings attached, he’s used to being balls deep inside someone and then never speaking a word to them again. He loves you. The thought plays over and over in his mind. He grabs his phone and his wallet and his keys before heading out the door, shuffling into his car and heading out on his mission.
The drive to the ice cream place wasn’t nearly as awkward as you thought it’d be, finding a lot to talk about with Argyle. He’s friendly and outgoing, never forcing a conversation but also never leaving room for the silences to be awkward. You don’t feel like you have to act a certain way to impress him, he’s just happy to be with you. It’s refreshing, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t find your mind wandering elsewhere. It was already proving hard to keep Eddie out of your thoughts - Argyle would make a reference to something Eddie liked, the air freshener in Argyle’s car is the same one as in Eddie’s, so on and so forth. It’s like your brain was purposely torturing you, distracting you from having a good time. Eddie probably wasn’t thinking about you, so why did you have to be plagued with near constant thoughts of him?
“Hey, are you okay?” Argyle’s smooth voice breaks you out of your thoughts.
“Huh? Oh, yeah, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to zone out. I’m fine,” you give him a reassuring smile, and he looks at you for only a moment before seeming to accept your response.
“Well, anyway, I’ve never had the ice cream here but Jonathan said it’s the best. You’ll have to give me some recommendations,” he grins as he pulls his car into the parking lot, one hand on the wheel as the other taps on the crevice of the open window.
“Will do,” you smile. “Though I have to warn you, I always get the same damn thing,” you laugh, and he laughs along with you.
You both step out of the car, the sweet scent of waffle cones and vanilla milkshakes filling your nose. Argyle opens the door and a bell chimes, signaling your entrance as he holds the door for you. The air conditioning is on full blast, hitting your skin and making goosebumps prick up. You cross your arms instinctively, rubbing the skin for some warmth as you eye the menu, even though you never stray from your tried and true favorite. Argyle notices your slight shivering, immediately slipping his hoodie off and holding it out to you.
You start to decline politely before he waves you off.
“You’re only gonna get colder once you start eating your ice cream. I insist, take it,” you blush a little as you take the jacket, slipping it over your shoulders and leaving the zipper undone.
It’s big on you, Argyle having a height advantage, so you bunch up the sleeves. Instantly, your brain goes to a memory of you at an ice skating rink with Eddie and the rest of the group. You’d forgotten your jacket at home, and Eddie had offered you his within milliseconds of you starting to shiver. It was one of few times where Eddie made any sort of affection towards you known to others, rather than keeping it a raunchy secret, and you’d felt on top of the world parading around in his sweatshirt. Of course, that night had ended no differently than the others, Eddie fucking you into his mattress and taking you home afterwards, leaving you feeling empty.
You try to replace the thoughts of Eddie with thoughts of your current date, try to convince yourself that wearing Argyle’s hoodie feels just as good as wearing Eddie’s, but it doesn’t, and you can’t. You put as much focus as you can onto what Argyle’s saying, put on a happy face as you give him your flavor recommendations, but a man that’s not here is tugging at your heart strings all the while. You order at the counter, your usual birthday cake milkshake, letting Argyle decide a moment longer. You actually wince when he orders two scoops of butterscotch ice cream, the exact same thing Eddie would order the few times you’d come here with all of your friends. You feel like the world is playing a sick joke on you, refusing to let you let go of Eddie. You feel like you’re not even in your body when you grab a hold of the cold cup that your frozen dessert is in, only coming back to reality when Argyle asks where you want to sit.
You choose a booth by the window, the electric glow of the ‘Open’ sign flickering onto the table through the glass pane. Argyle takes a bite of his ice cream, and you give him your best effort in conversation.
“Well, what do you think?” you smile at him, forcing it a little too much maybe.
“I think I could drop dead right now this is so good,” he smiles right back, licking his spoon clean of another mouthful. “How’s yours?”
“Even better considering I didn’t have to pay for it,” you take a sip of your shake to punctuate your sentence. “Thank you, again.”
“Don’t have to thank me, I’m more than happy to pay for a girl as pretty as you,” he gives you another little grin, nothing but kindness behind his eyes.
You smile back, but you’re cursing inside your head. You have a sweet guy sitting in front of you, genuinely trying to get to know you and have a nice date, and you can’t stop thinking about someone else. There’s nothing wrong with Argyle, and you’re trying your very best to will yourself to fall in love with him or something when the door chime breaks you from your thoughts.
You look up at the door instinctively, and you almost choke on your ice cream at what you see. Eddie walks in through the door, looking gorgeous as ever, because of fucking course this would happen right now. You go rigid when he looks your direction and meets your eyes, and your face is instantly flushed with heat. You suddenly feel suffocated in Argyle’s hoodie, your stomach churning as you stare into those all-too-familiar brown eyes. You manage to tear your gaze away before he does, not wanting Argyle to get suspicious and try to discover what you’re staring at. You give yourself a mental kick, refusing to allow yourself to crumble in Eddie’s presence. Don’t let him see you sad, show him you’re fine without him. You reach across the table and brush your fingers on Argyle’s arm, laughing maybe a little too loud at something he says. You feel bad using him as revenge in this moment, but lucky for you, you don’t have to do it for very long. Eddie doesn’t order a thing, just turns on his heel and leaves.
Eddie feels like he can’t breathe when he gets back into his car, sitting in the parking lot with his heart threatening to shatter beneath his ribcage. You’re on a date. He was going to try and fix things, going to tell you he loves you, and you’re on a date. Of course he noticed the garment keeping you warm, far too big to be your jacket. You’re wearing this other guy’s jacket, so the date must be going well. He feels the bile rise in his throat at the thought of you in another guy’s clothes, the thought of another guy taking you home and kissing you and holding you and treating you the way you deserved - the way he never treated you. The worst part of it all is that Eddie knows he deserves this. He doesn’t deserve to get the happy ending, he burned this whole thing to the ground and he’s left searching for remnants of life in the wake of the fire. He pulls out of the parking lot, no destination in mind anymore. The flowers he got for you sit mockingly in his passenger seat, their sweet scent filling his nose as if to laugh at him. What the fuck does he do now?
After seeing Eddie at the ice cream place, you couldn’t get your head back on straight. You ended up telling Argyle you had a killer of a headache, and without hesitation he brought you home. Guilt tugged at your feet as you trudged up your stairs with him, tugged at your heart when he asked if there was anything he could do for you before he left. The poor, sweet guy didn’t even question it, showed no indication of him doubting your excuse. You knew you’d get an earful from Robin and Nance if they got wind of this. You’d promised Argyle you’d be okay and told him he was fine to leave, thanking him for the lovely date. You hated yourself for the way you couldn’t like him, the way every inch of your body and mind was stuck on Eddie. Nothing about Argyle was bad, and you lay cursing yourself on your mattress in your room. You eventually decide to change into something more comfortable, shed any tangible reminders of the date you ended too soon. You crawl under your covers in sweatpants and your coziest sweatshirt, pulling the blankets up to your face as frustrated tears burn your cheeks. Anger bubbles up inside of you, and takes over any other emotion you’d been feeling.
You’re angry that you can’t stop thinking about Eddie. Angry that you had to see Eddie tonight. Angry that you went on a date with a very nice guy and couldn’t get into it because of Eddie. Angry that Eddie left without a word when you told him you loved him. Angry that you let him treat you so poorly because you just can’t get enough of him. Cotton sweater sleeves are soaked with tears as you let the feeling flow from you, balling your hands up into fists and releasing them. Entirely unsure of what to do next, or how to get over this.
Eddie went home for all of an hour before realizing he couldn’t just sit around in silence and do nothing. Not now that he’d already had his plan literally in motion, he couldn’t stop. Even if you didn’t love him anymore, even if you wanted nothing to do with him, even if you wanted to throw the flowers back in his face and throw a punch or two, he had to open up to you. He gets in his car, hands shaking and stomach in knots as he prepares himself. For all he knows, your date could be back at your place with you. Or maybe you aren’t even home yet. But he has to try, has to get his feelings out in the open, at least so you know - even if you don’t want to be with him. It feels like every stoplight on his drive is mocking him, glowing red for seemingly agonizing amounts of time. The more time he has to think, the more sick to his stomach he feels. When he finally arrives in the parking lot of your place, he just sits for a moment. Taking shaky breaths, his stomach somersaults in anxious anticipation. One ringed hand reaches out for the beautiful bouquet of flowers beside him, picking them up by the crinkly paper they’re encased in before he opens his car door and shuts off the engine. Every stomp of his shoes on the stairs makes his heart pound faster, coming closer and closer to a confession bigger than any he’s ever given before. He stands in front of your door, begging silently for you to simply answer, and finally, he raises a fist to the wood to alert you.
The knocking startles you out of your slew of emotions, and you groan as you heave yourself out of bed. You’re fully expecting it to be Nancy or Robin at the door, or both of them, ready to interrogate you on why you cut your date short. You swing the door wide, mouth open and fully ready to defend yourself to the girls. Instead, you’re met with that curly frizzy hair and those round brown eyes that you know too well. Eddie stands like a deer in headlights, as if he wasn’t the one who knocked on your door, holding a massive bouquet of flowers in one hand. You let out an incredulous laugh, a no-fucking-way-are-you-here-right-now laugh. You go to slam the door right in his stupid beautiful face when he holds an arm out, wrenching it open.
“Wait. Please,” his voice chokes up as he says it.
“What the fuck are you doing here, Eddie? Saw me on a date with someone else and had to come assert your dominance or something?” you scoff, crossing your arms as if to protect yourself from more emotional hurt.
“No, I…. is your date still here?”
“What if he is, Eddie? Can’t wrap your head around the fact that another guy wanted to go out with me?” you snap.
“No no, I just… I don’t wanna do this if he’s here,” his voice is desperate, rushing to get the words out.
“He’s not here. And do what, exactly? String me along again just to leave me stranded in the end?” the words hurt you as you say them, a part of your heart wanting to just run to him and never let him go, and the other part wanting to run from him.
“I need to tell you how sorry I am. I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N. I was an asshole, a horrible person to you, and you never deserved it,” his eyes flicker down to his feet before tentatively meeting yours again.
“Oh, my knight in shining armor, arriving at my door to apologize and I’m supposed to just fall at your feet, huh?” you shift your weight, raising an eyebrow at him.
“No! No, I don’t expect anything from you. But I can’t run from my feelings anymore.”
“Feelings?” you furrow your brows, your chest tightening.
Eddie is silent for a moment, fingers nervously fidgeting with the paper surrounding the bright green stems and vibrant petals. You roll your eyes, about to shut the door once again when he speaks up.
“I love you!” he blurts, his eyes frantic as they search yours.
“What?”
“I love you. I love you so fucking much, Y/N. I’ve known you were special since I met you, you’re different than anyone else I’ve ever met. I was too much of a fucking coward to tell you how much I liked you earlier because… because I was scared of getting hurt. And all I did was hurt you in the process, and I’m so sorry.”
You’re dumbfounded, your mouth hanging open slightly as you struggle for words.
“You didn’t say a word to me, Eddie,” your voice comes out quiet, pained. “You left without a single fucking word,” you hiss.
“I know I did. And it was the worst mistake of my entire life. I panicked, I didn’t know what to do - and that’s not an excuse - but I’m so, so sorry.”
You can see the hurt in his eyes, the fear encompassing espresso brown. He’s not joking around, he’s not playing with you this time.
“And you don’t have to say anything else. If you don’t love me anymore, if you don’t want to be with me or see me ever again, I get it. Say the word and I will walk away and never show my face to you again. I was a jerk, and I don’t deserve you. But I swear to you, I will never - never - hurt you again if you let me stay. I’m sorry it took me so long to say how I feel,” Eddie’s voice is breaking, and you can tell how much effort it’s taking him to keep himself together.
You snap, then. Your love for Eddie that you’ve been trying to shove down for weeks, finally claws it’s way out. No more forcing it back. No more hiding. Your feet are moving before you can process it. You throw yourself at him, taking the flowers and tossing them to the floor, wrapping your arms around him and feeling him hold you.
“I hate you so fucking much, Eddie Munson,” you smile through your wobbly voice, a new kind of tears springing in your eyes.
And Eddie laughs, his eyes also watery, because he knows you don’t mean it.
“I love you,” he says.
“I love you, too.”
“Be mine forever, please,” he murmurs, his eyes fluttering shut as his lips ghost over yours.
“It would be the honor of a lifetime,” you say.
He presses his forehead to yours, letting you lead when you lean in to kiss him. It feels like fireworks go off above your heads, your lips colliding in a way that finally won’t lead to a quick fuck on someone else’s mattress. No, this time you kiss him and it feels real. You feel secure, no longer worrying that the floor will fall out beneath your feet. His hands hold your face, thumbs brushing soft strokes along the apples of your cheeks. You cling to him like he’s your lifeline, kissing him like you never have before. Pouring your love into him, filling his cup because he’s finally allowing you to.
“Wait,” you say suddenly, pulling back. Eddie’s stomach drops, worried you’ve changed your mind. “I owe you an apology too,” you say.
He gives you a questioning look.
“I know you weren’t flirting with those women at The Hideaway the night we went out… Nancy told me it was a misunderstanding… and it was wrong of me to accuse you.”
“Sweetheart… you had every right to assume. I wasn’t exactly the kindest to you…” Eddie frowns.
“Even so, you weren’t flirting and you still deserve some grace. I’m sorry, Eddie. I blew this whole thing up in your face over something you didn’t actually do,” your voice is remorseful, and Eddie tilts your chin up with his index finger.
“I forgive you, always. I was never upset with you for that,” he promises, and his heart aches. The sweetest thing standing before him, apologizing when there was no need to.
You kiss him again, pulling him with you as you shuffle backwards into your apartment. He kicks the door shut, holding you to his chest as he stands against it. Your fingers clutch the collar of his shirt, mouth moving against his with fervor, like this is your last chance to kiss him. Eddie gasps in surprise when you tug him even closer to you, his large palms spanning across your back and holding you snug to his body. Tongues find their way into each other’s mouths, soft like velvet as they lick and explore. You find yourself grinding your hips into his, your body desperate to have him in a way like never before.
“Sweetheart, sweets,” Eddie pushes out between kisses, finally holding you back from attacking his mouth once more. “This doesn’t have to go any further… if you don’t want it to. I don’t want you to think that’s the reason I’m here,” Eddie says, and his tone is suddenly sad. You know the guilt is still eating at him, and will probably continue to eat at him no matter how much you reassure him going forward.
“I don’t think that’s why you’re here,” you reply, cupping a hand to the side of his face and looking intensely into his eyes, reassuring him. “But I’d be a dirty fucking liar if I said I haven’t missed your cock lately,” your voice drops lower, leaning up to his ear to murmur the words into it.
Your breath tickles his neck and he shudders, his cock stiffening in his jeans.
“Shit, baby,” he breathes, diving back down to your mouth for another heated kiss.
You lead him to your bedroom, somehow managing to make it safely despite the fact that your lips might as well be velcro’d to each other. Your hands roam his body like it’s the first time, butterflies fluttering madly in your stomach. Eddie’s hands are gentle on you, touching you in a new way. Nothing is rushed or hasty, instead Eddie takes his time as his hands find their way up your sweatshirt. You shiver when his fingertips graze your hips and start to glide up your back, his mouth devouring yours all the while. He groans into your mouth when you reach a hand down to palm him through the denim of his pants, making you pull back to smirk at him.
“Getting worked up for me, Munson?” you tease, silently reveling in the way he’s letting himself be more receptive to you.
“You have no idea, sweetheart,” Eddie murmurs, his hands steady as he holds you.
You smile, leaning back in to kiss him with a clash of teeth. Eddie pushes you backwards gently, taking slight control as he encourages you down onto your bed. You lie back on your mattress, spreading your legs open for him to slot himself between. He climbs on top of you, hovering over you, dark curls falling in your face and tickling your skin. Your phone rings then, breaking you both out of the moment. The screen lights up with Nancy’s name, and you can’t help but laugh. Texts from Robin pop up right after, and Eddie raises a brow at you.
“I’ll debrief them later,” you smirk at him, shoving your phone away and holding his face in your hands.
“I’m so incredibly in love with you,” he says, his eyes pools of melted chocolate, sickeningly sweet with adoration as he gazes at you.
“You have no idea how badly I’ve wanted to hear you say that,” you breathe out a little laugh, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear.
“I never thought I’d feel this way about anyone… never thought I’d let myself,” Eddie frowns slightly, relaxing when you grip his face in your hands.
“Thank you for letting me be the first,” you give him a soft smile, eyes lighting up when he blushes.
You pull his mouth back to yours, needy hands grabbing at the buttons on his shirt in a hint for him to remove it. He obliges instantly, unbuttoning it and sipping it off before being discarded onto your floor. You take a moment just to look at him, your eyes raking over his shirtless form. During your past hookups you never felt like you had the time to admire him, half the time you were too embarrassed to even try, for fear that he’d mock you for it. Now it’s different. You let your eyes and hands wander up and down pale skin, tracing the ink lines etched into various places. You can feel him growing harder in his pants when your fingers ghost over his crotch, smiling into the kiss when Eddie lets out a heavy breath.
“Need to get some of these clothes off you, sweetheart,” he mumbles into your mouth, pawing at the hem of your thick sweatshirt.
You help him pull it off of you, exposing your tits which lay perfectly on your chest, nipples perking up from the chill of your air conditioning. It’s his turn to admire you now, his hands cupping the soft skin of your breasts as he looks at you like you’re the greatest thing he’s ever seen.
“You’re s’fuckin perfect,” he murmurs, pressing kisses to your neck. “‘M so lucky,” a kiss to your collarbone, “the luckiest guy in the world,” his lips trail down to your tits before he wraps them around one of your peaked nipples.
His tongue kitten licks the sensitive little bundle, getting you breathless as his mouth switches over to the other one. One hand finds its way beneath the waistband of your pants, fingers curling over your mound still concealed by the thin fabric of your panties. There’s a wet patch already forming there, and you know he can feel it. Your cheeks flush when his fingers circle the wetness and he gasps a little, giving you a devilish smirk.
“Oh? What’s this?” he teases, leaning down to kiss your lips and then trailing his mouth to your jawline.
“Need you,” you whine, too desperate for him to retaliate against his taunting.
“You have me, sweet girl. For as long as you want me,” he brushes a strand of hair out of your face, leaning down once more to kiss you all over.
His lips move over the swell of your breasts, down to your bellybutton, finally stopping right above the fabric of your sweatpants. Big brown doe eyes look up at you, waiting for permission. You pull your bottom lip between your teeth, nodding at him as you feel yourself tremble slightly with anticipation. He hooks his fingers into the cozy fabric, tugging the pants down your legs before tossing them to the floor. His mouth kisses over your underwear, tongue pressing flat against your folds, causing you to moan at the heat you feel at your core.
“Ed-dieeeeee,” you choke out between a gasp, reaching a hand down in an attempt to take your panties off.
“So impatient, aren’t we?” he purrs, admiring the wet spot he contributed to on your underwear before pulling them off and letting them mingle with the rest of your discarded garments.
He buries his face in your cunt almost instantly, his plush lips so soft against your folds as he presses kisses to them. He tongue is gentle when it first licks a stripe up through your wetness, and you hiss at the contact. You missed his mouth on you, missed his hands roaming your body. It feels so good to know he’s not going anywhere this time. Eddie wastes no time getting to work, his tongue dipping inside of you before playing with your clit, shaggy curls tickling your inner thighs as his head moves. His name falls from your lips like a mantra as he devours you, licking and sucking on you like you’re his last meal. He ruts his hips down into your mattress, erection straining in his jeans. You notice the movement and halt him immediately, almost losing your breath when he looks up at you with sparkling eyes, chin glistening with your slick.
“Why don’t you take those jeans off, handsome?” you encourage, reaching down to run a hand through his wild hair.
His fingers undo his belt buckle with ease, it’s the handcuff one that you always struggled to maneuver. Black denim joins the pile on your floor, and you notice the tented fabric of his boxers instantly.
“Poor baby,” you coo, “look how worked up you are for me,” your gentle fingers stroke his shaft through the fabric, earning a deep groan from him.
“Feel so fuckin’ good, baby,” he rasps, and you can tell how desperate he is for more contact.
“Why don’t you fuck me, then?” you ask, looking up at him with half-lidded eyes.
Eddie doesn’t need to be asked twice, shoving his boxers down his legs and off entirely. His cock springs free, and he’s harder than you think you’ve ever seen him. You can see the veins protruding from the shaft, the head a flustered red with pearlescent pre-cum just starting to drip out. A patch of dark curls rests at the base of his cock, enticing you, his heavy balls hanging low beneath. You nearly whimper at the sight, and he watches you as you take in every inch of him. He’s always loved the way you love his cock, though it’s never felt quite like it does now. He knows he’s presenting himself to you in a new way, and you’re admiring him in a new way. All he wants now is to bury himself inside you, feeling every single inch of your tight pussy as it swallows him whole.
“You ready for me, baby?” he questions, leaning down and hovering mere centimeters from your lips.
“Mhm, please,” you whine, keening up to press your lips to his in quick kisses, a tiny string of saliva connecting the two of you.
One of Eddie’s hands grabs the base of his cock, rubbing it up and down through your wet folds. You arch your back instinctively, gasping at the sensation. Eddie chuckles, low and deep, pressing kisses to your jawline and traveling down to your neck. Without much warning he slips his cock into you, the head stretching you as it paves the way for the rest of him. You let out a pornographic moan, holding nothing back from him this time around. You want him to know how good he makes you feel, how he sets every inch of you on fire in the most remarkable way. He continues to stretch you open for him, groaning at how easily you’re taking him.
“Shit, sweet girl, you’re just suckin’ me right in,” Eddie praises, his forehead dropping to rest on top of yours.
You can’t form words in response, the air being punched from your lungs when he sinks the last inch of him in. You’re so incredibly full of him, you swear you can feel him in every inch of your body. Your hands wrap around his back, clinging to the backs of his shoulders, hooking yourself to him. You want him closer than ever, need him all to yourself, and the way he brushes his nose against yours lets you know that he’s not going anywhere. He starts to slowly move, hips rocking as he thrusts gently. Even with his subtle movements, the sounds coming from your cunt are obscene, and all he can do is curse under his breath. You whimper beneath him, clinging ever tighter to his soft skin.
“What is it, baby?” he asks, stroking your cheek with the backs of his fingers.
“A little harder, Eddie, please?” you ask, round eyes looking up at him.
“Okay, sweetheart. But I don’t wanna just fuck you tonight,” he says, pausing to kiss you. “I wanna make love to you, the way I should’ve been for months now,” he admits, his cheeks flushing pink at his vulnerability.
“I love you so fucking much,” you whisper against his lips, “make love to me then, Eddie.”
And that he does. He gives it to you a little harder, knowing it’ll drive you crazy if he keeps his movements too slow. But his strokes aren’t rushed, he’s not in a race to cum, he’s just taking his time with you. He rolls his hips into you, dragging out each thrust and letting you feel every vein and ridge in his cock as he stretches you. You’re a moaning mess beneath him, hair sprawled across your pillow, eyes glassy as you grow dumb on his thick length. Your lips brush, oftentimes frozen slack-jawed as you moan into each others’ mouths. Eddie devours every sweet sound you make for him, pinching his eyes shut as he picks up his pace a little. His balls slap against you as he delivers each thrust, filling you to the brim before pulling back out. His movements are sensual, his hands kneading your breasts or gripping your hips as he fucks into you. He kisses all over your face, unspoken ‘I love yous’ communicated by the affection.
You’re filled with so many emotions as you let him unravel you, your eyes welling up with tears. Having Eddie to yourself feels better than you could’ve imagined, every single snap of his hips into yours reminding you that this time, everything is different. He’s soaking you in like you’re uncharted territory waiting to be discovered, caressing every curve and dip of your body. You babble nonsense beneath him, his name falling from your lips over and over. Your lips are wobbly, eyes watery as you’re overwhelmed with adoration for him. Eddie’s quick to kiss your tears away, whispering his affections for you between each press of his soft lips.
“My favorite girl,” he mumbles into your skin.
The sentiment he’d given you so many times before, the one you always hoped he meant, always pining to be his most important girl. It sounds sweeter coming out of his mouth now, no doubt in your mind that he’s speaking the truth.
“‘M so close, Eddie,” you pant. “Gonna cum. Don’t stop don’t stop don’t stop,” your eyes roll back in your head as Eddie keeps a steady pace.
The tip of his cock hits just where you need it to, setting your insides ablaze. Eddie’s close, too, you can tell in the way his breathing has grown staggered.
“I’m gonna cum too, baby. Want it inside?”
“Yes,” you cry out, “please.”
Eddie rocks into you a few more times before you’re cumming around him, walls gripping him so tight, fluttering against his cock and giving him the friction he so desperately needs. You’ve got a death grip on him as he spills his load inside of you, his hips slowing as every drop fills you. He finally stills once every drop has left him, taking heavy breaths as he grounds himself. Your tits are pressed against his chest, feeling him so impossibly close to you, sweat coating your skin as well as his.
Chocolate brown eyes meet yours as you come out of your euphoric haze, Eddie giving you a lovesick grin. You giggle as you smile back at him, still catching your breath.
“That was amazing. You’re amazing,” Eddie says, letting out an airy little laugh.
“Feels so good to love you,” you reply, making him blush yet again.
He pulls out of you slowly, making you wince slightly. He goes into your bathroom without a word, grabbing a clean towel and getting it slightly damp with warm water. He returns to clean you up, wiping your sensitive skin oh so gently, leaving kisses on your inner thighs in the towel’s wake. You sigh contentedly, curling up under your blankets while Eddie goes to clean himself up. He makes himself comfortable in bed beside you once he returns, silently staring at you once more with those gorgeous eyes, saying so much without even opening his mouth. He pulls you closer to him, kissing the top of your head and rubbing your back.
“Thank you,” he says quietly. “For everything.”
You don’t say anything in response, words aren’t necessary to convey how you feel. The way you curl closer into him, wrapping your arms around him and squeezing, says everything Eddie needs to hear. You fall asleep not long after, the sound of Eddie’s breathing and the feeling of his strong arms around you soothing you into a slumber.
The next morning you wake to sunlight peeking through your curtains, casting a soft orange glow on your entire room. You rub your eyes, letting them focus as you look around your room. Your gaze lands on the discarded clothes on your floor before trailing upwards, over the sleeping form beside you concealed by your comforter, until it finally lands on Eddie’s face snuggled into your pillow. Frizzy curls sprawled over the pillowcase, long eyelashes kissing his cheeks as he continues to sleep peacefully. You smile to yourself, your heart thumping in your chest as you hear him snoring softly. After the mess of the last couple of months, your aching heart and puffy eyes over the last couple weeks, the dust is finally settling. Everything was set on fire, and you’re realizing now that flames don’t always leave decay and destruction in their wake. Sometimes, they pave the way for new growth, blossoming beginnings. You and Eddie lie here together now, as the smoke leaves the air and the sun rises, bathed in the afterglow.
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taglist: @paleidiot @ali-r3n @edsmunsonsgirl @edsforehead @bambi-horror @emma77645 @sidthedollface2 @figmentofquinn @girlwiththerubyslippers @myblindthirdeye-blog @aysheashea @suppeople @peaches-roses-sins @hideoutside @nope-thanks @squidscottjeans @hellfire--cult @chrissymjstan @hargrovesswifee @alissabckr @munsonzgf @a1ex-ba1ex @parmawiolets @zaddyskye69 @siriuslysmoking
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iid-smile · 8 days
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his printer , shinaguzawa sanemi
x fem!teacher!reader ! modern au, maths teacher sanemi, he's got a big fat crush on you! not proofread
author's note: idk what to put here.. i just couldnt stop thinking about teacher sanemi ahuhuhu 🌝
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most people were very aware of mr shinaguzawa's bias towards you.
no, more like a crush of sorts. you're a teacher, a fellow colleague of his, and your classroom just so happened to be next to where his maths lessons are held. coincidentally, your room is the only classroom in the school that doesn't have a printer, so you often make trips to his, because his is the closest.
teaching-wise, you're a lot more gentle on your students, so little to no noise was heard except for the shouting coming through the thin shared wall. somehow, mr shinaguzawa always manages to get troublemakers to teach, undoubtedly growing more and more irritated and stressed with each day that passes. you don't blame him, obviously, since the only way to get them to behave seemed to be yelling at them.
really, the only time they saw a little bit of light was when an angel liked you walked in, just emitting that addicting aura everywhere you go, a soothing effect of sorts.
his lesson had just come to an end, the kids quickly packing up their things and running out, as per usual. he let out a frustrated sigh in a failed attempt to calm down, running a hand through his messy white hair from all the times he pulled and tugged at it in a silent fit of rage.
just another rowdy and loud set of students coming within the next few minutes. was he ready? not at all. he needs a break, and a long one, yet the school year just started.
suddenly, a very familiar figure moves into the doorway of his classroom, catching his eye. that relaxed, tender gaze that met his fiery ones. he pauses, quickly straightening himself out. he tries to school his facial expression to look more neutral, hoping that would be enough. the last thing he wanted to do was be rude to you.
"need something?" he asks you, his voice coming out a lot more harsh than he intended. in reality, the sight of you had made him a little flustered. a little too flustered. quickly, he glances away from you and crosses his arms over his chest in an effort to look nonchalant.
"just wanted to pop in here before your next class starts..." you slowly approach him, but make sure to keep a professional distance. "are you planning on having a test today, by any chance?"
he slightly raises an eyebrow at you, a little surprised. though the two of you were in different departments, he was used to questions about assignments and whatnot, but not about possible upcoming tests. "yes," he says, "i am. why're you asking?"
for a beat, your expression drops to worry, but you smile once again. "just a bit wary of coming in while the kids are trying to focus. i have some things to print later on, so..."
he lets out a quiet hum of acknowledgment at your reasoning. in all honesty, he never really minded it when you visited to use the printer, even if the kids got a little distracted or chatty. he didn't blame them at all, you were an easy topic to talk about when you were and weren't around.
"you don't really need to ask," he says bluntly. "the kids'll get distracted either way." he uncrosses his arms and lets them fall to his sides, taking a small step toward you. "you're free to come in when you want. printer's always here, don't gotta ask me so much."
you appear to be taken aback. "are you sure?"
he scoffs, rolling his eyes. "yeah. 'course i'm sure." he says, gesturing a hand toward the printer. "nobody needs you going around the entire school to just print something. that takes up extra time you could use to be with the rest of your class."
he doesn't want to admit it out loud, but he also likes having you in close proximity. it provides a nice distraction on not-so-good days like these; which was every day. "saves your feet some rest too. besides, it's not like the kids are doing anything other than talking their asses off until class starts anyway." he says with a shrug. oh, was he talking too much? did he sound too casual?
you stare at him, and your permanent smile widens more, something he hasn't seen before. you actually looked happy— no, relieved. only now has he realised that the difference in your expressions could be so different. "thank you, shinaguzawa."
"it's no problem, miss." he offers the best smile he can himself, pretty crooked, but he's sure you can see it. with a little bow, you turn on your heel and exit the classroom, your hand grazing the doorframe for a moment. his eyes remain fixed to where you just were.
please come back and print some papers. soon too.
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callmeagardengnome · 2 months
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˚ʚ paint my world ɞ˚ | SONG MINGI
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pairings ᯓ idol!mingi x painter! fem!reader
genre ᯓ soulmate au, one-shot
synopsis ᯓ you’ve been seeing in black and white for all your life - until a popular idol comes in and changes things
w.c ᯓ 2.7k
author’s note: make sure to like and repost!!
not proofread!
masterlist
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blue. you’ve never seen blue before.
you stood in front of the clothing rack in shock, trying to process what you were looking at.
from the moment you were born, you were cursed by your soulmark. colour was something that was foreign to you, something that didn’t seem real. you never understood why your friends would fight over certain crayons or when people looked up to the sky, admiring its beauty - it all looked the same to you.
as depressing as it sounds, seeing in black and white wasn’t too bad. you weren’t distracted by the things around you and you could actually focus in school for the most part.
sure, you had a few awkward moments. like when you wore a completely mismatched outfit - highlighter yellow shirt paired with murky orange pants and pastel pink shoes. if anything, it taught you a learning lesson to always ask your parents for fashion advice.
ironically, you became a painter after you graduated. you were always a creative kid and being colourblind wasn’t going to hold you back from releasing your works into the universe.
you slowly rose to fame, with your artworks capturing the eyes of millions around the world. you even managed to earn a lot of money from it, leading you to buy more supplies for your job.
you stood up from your chair, cracking your back. you’ve been working on this certain art piece for at least 7 hours and you decided to finally take a break. it’s been a while since you’ve painted - you took a short holiday to one of your favourite countries which led you to forget the long hours of sitting down.
you reached for your phone, dialling your best friend’s number.
“hello?” your best friend’s voice echoed in the room.
“i’m boredd,” you groaned out, flopping onto your bed. “can we do something?”
she chuckled. “i’m guessing you’re done painting?”
“i’m taking a break,” you said, shifting, making yourself more comfortable.
“if you want, i can pick you up and we can go shopping?” your best friend suggested, her voice sounding more excited.
“you know me so well,” you replied, hanging up almost immediately. you ran to your closet and picked out a simple outfit, one that you knew matched each other.
you scrolled through your phone, waiting for your best friend to text you. when she finally came to pick you up, the both of you went to your favourite shopping centre, looking at the different stores.
that was what led you to.. blue? pink? yellow?
in all honesty, you had no idea of what colour you were looking at. when your best friend decided to stop at a random clothing store, you thought that it wouldn’t hurt to look around a little bit. while she was in the women’s section, you went over to the men’s section - you never know if they have better clothes.
you browsed through the selection of clothes mindlessly until a shirt caught your eye. “ayo what-“
you went closer to the shirt, one that stood out in a vibrant colour against the monochrome background. you touched the sleeves, the material. it was alien to you. for all of your life, everything was in greyscale. you’ve never seen anything as bright, or beautiful as this shirt that was in front you. you took a moment to inspect the shirt, wanting to imprint the colour into your mind. after all, you never know the next time you would see actual colour.
“‘____’?”
you turned to look at your best friend, who stood a few steps away from you, looking confused.
“…are you okay?” she asked cautiously, not knowing why you looked so stunned.
“dude-“ you coughed out, glancing between the shirt and your best friend. “i can see colour.”
her jaw dropped. “wait- really? can you see the colour of my shoes?” she pointed at her shoes eagerly, nearly dropping the pile of clothes she was carrying.
“well- no..” you replied, disappointed. “but i can see the colour of this shirt..?”
“hm..” your best friend hummed, moving closer to you. she awkwardly reached into her pocket, before starting to google about your soulmark.
˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆。☆ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆˚ʚɞ ⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
when mingi found out that ATEEZ was going on tour, he wasn’t exactly thrilled. of course, he was happy that he got to meet the international ATINY, but he couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed that he couldn’t properly enjoy the trip.
to him, he didn’t really see the fun in leaving the country, or even going outside. everything looked the same to him. no matter what, he couldn’t see the true beauty of the things around him - so what was the point of feeling excited to go overseas?
mingi flinched when the lights shined intensely in the plane. he slept throughout the entire plane ride, not even bothering to look outside the windows. he absentmindedly followed his group, trailing behind everyone as they got off the plane.
“what..?” his thoughts echoed in his head as he looked around at the airport.
it was.. bright. unusually bright.
it was almost comical how bright the airport was - it even hurt his eyes. he had to blink a couple of times to make sure that he wasn’t hallucinating.
he stopped following the group, taking in his surroundings. was this what normal people saw?
everything was so.. vibrant and bold. he couldn’t even comprehend that people could see this on the daily and not talk about it more. sure, he bumped into a few people by stopping suddenly, but that didn’t matter - in fact, nothing else mattered. mingi could see colour, and he wasn’t planning to stop anytime soon.
“dude are you okay?” yunho snapped his fingers in front of mingi, finally catching his attention.
mingi furrowed his eyebrows, hitting yunho’s hand away from his face. yunho looked at mingi, concerned. “we’ve been calling you for the past five minutes, why are you standing in the middle of nowhere?”
mingi turned away from yunho, shifting his eyes around the airport. “i can see colour.”
a collective ‘WHAT’ was heard from the group as they gathered around mingi, attacking him with questions.
“i don’t know, maybe this airport is just.. different?” mingi said, unsure.
“does that mean your soulmate is here?” wooyoung asked, looking at his members curiously.
“maybe,” seonghwa shrugged, typing in his phone. “i just googled it, apparently you can see colour of the objects your soulmate touches or the places they’ve been in often.”
yunho whistled. “that means your soulmate in the same city as us,” he said, nudging mingi.
mingi smiled, running his fingers through his hair. “how long are we staying here again?”
“..four days?”
“i only have four days to find my soulmate?” mingi exclaimed, his eyes widening in shock. “how am i supposed to do that?”
“i mean.. we have one rest day..?”
mingi groaned, his face in his hands. he was so caught up with the thought of finding his soulmate that tour completely left his mind. he had spent all of his life in black and white and he didn’t want to return back to that.
mingi asked his members to teach him the different colours. he ended up learning that colour can have different hues, brightness and he didn’t want to stop being surrounded by these colours.
unfortunately, they had to leave the airport due to their packed schedule. everything became ten times more boring. the cars passing by, the trees, the pavement, nothing interested him anymore.
his member’s obviously noticed his change in mood and did a small detour to a nearby shopping centre. they wandered around, going to different stores, looking at the different items the city had to offer.
mingi cheered up a bit when he entered a clothing store that was his style. he made a beeline to the men’s section and tried on a shirt that he liked. unluckily, his manager had to drag him to the car, preventing him from buying the shirt.
luckily for you though, fate brought you to the shirt. you unhooked it from the rack, bringing it closer to your face.
“what colour is this?” you asked your best friend.
“it’s blue,” she answered with a wide grin on her face, barely containing her excitement.
you nodded, unable to take your eyes off of the shirt. “where is blue found?”
“the sky,” she said eagerly. “the ocean too, it’s really beautiful.”
she added, “blue is normally used for sadness though. a lot of films portray it that way.”
you didn’t know that a beautiful colour like blue, could be associated with such a depressing emotion. it didn’t make sense to you.
however, you put off your feelings of confusion. now wasn’t the time to question these sorts of things. now was the time to find your soulmate.
˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆。☆ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆˚ʚɞ ⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
it was day 3 of ATEEZ being in your city. with each day passing by, mingi felt more and more anxious. he hated the fact that he didn’t have time to find you and how he had to spend most of his time performing.
obviously, he was extremely grateful that he got to meet his fans, but there was a part of him that always felt irritated.
not only that, on the day that he was planning on resting, he got interrupted.
“shouldn’t you ask someone else?” mingi asked, raising an eyebrow.
“no one here likes art,” hongjoong groaned, sitting next to mingi. “i get that you’re colourblind but pleasee accompany me.”
hongjoong was begging mingi to follow him to an art museum. there was art exhibition going on that was intriguing to hongjoong - but unfortunately, was not interesting to his members. this led to hongjoong asking his colourblind member as a last resort to follow him to the museum.
“maybe you can find your soulmate there,” hongjoong mentioned, wiggling his eyebrows.
“i doubt it,” mingi scoffed. “but you know what? i’ll follow you.. cuz i’m a good friend.”
hongjoong rolled his eyes before running off to get ready for the art exhibition.
˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆。☆ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ ⋆˚ʚɞ ⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
you looked at yourself in the mirror, debating what outfit to wear. should you go casual? formal? after a year of working on it, the launch of your art exhibition was finally here. it was an important milestone in your life and you did not want to mess it up.
you sighed, walking over to your closet. your eyes immediately landed on the vibrant blue shirt hanging on the side of your dull wardrobe. was this the right choice? it was a nice shirt, and it did feel nice to know what colour you were wearing for once.
after considering it, you grabbed the shirt from the rack and hurriedly put it on. you needed to make it to the museum quick - after all, you didn’t want to be late to such an important event.
you booked a taxi to the museum, going over to where your artworks were stationed. you looked at your art pieces in pride, unable to stop yourself from smiling wildly at them.
mingi and hongjoong reached the museum slightly later than they wanted to. they had to squeeze through the swarm of art enthusiasts crowding at the front of the exhibition.
when the two men finally reached the start of the exhibition, they’re eyes widened in shock. while hongjoong was impressed by your artistic talents, mingi’s jaw was on the ground for a different reason.
it was fully coloured.
he’s never seen a coloured picture before, let alone a painting. when he glanced over at the other art pieces, he noticed that they were too, coloured vividly.
“why- why is this coloured?” mingi muttered to himself, moving closer to the painting.
“you can see this?” hongjoong asked in surprise.
mingi nodded, walking over to another painting. “yeah.. all of the paintings actually.”
the two of them stood in silence, both thinking about what this could mean.
“dude- is the artist your soulmate?” hongjoong exclaimed, staring at mingi with wide eyes. “you can see colour of the objects your soulmate touch right?”
“uhuh..”
“you need to find her,” hongjoong said, squeezing mingi’s arm. “it’s the first day of the exhibition, she’s 100% here.”
mingi wasn’t prepared at all to meet you. the idea of even being in the same area as you terrified him. he was thinking about finding you on their last day in the city, he hadn’t even finished planning out what he wanted to say to you.
unfortunately, hongjoong pushed mingi away, forcing him to look for you.
mingi had zero clue of what you looked like - he had no idea of who he was looking for. after a while, he noticed that one of his shoe laces were untied and kneeled down to tie them. that was when he noticed something strange.
he saw blue-coloured footsteps littered all over the ground. he quickly stood up, looking around the room like a madman. at first, he was was searching for you without any real evidence of you being at the museum, but now, everything changed.
you were actually there, and he was going to do his best to find you.
as creepy as it sounds, mingi followed your footsteps, trying to trace where you were going. it was obvious that you were frantically running around the museum, for reasons that he did not know.
while mingi was trying his hardest to find you, you were trying your hardest to prevent any issues from happening. there had been certain entry problems or people requesting you to explain some of your artworks, which led you to scurry around the museum.
your eyes were glued to your clipboard that had all of the things you needed to take note of jotted down. you were so focused that you accidentally bumped into someone.
“sorry-“ you apologised quickly.
mingi picked up your clipboard and handed it to you. not expecting much of the interaction, he almost immediately moved away from you until.. you made eye contact.
the world around you seemed to stop.
the colours came in gradually at first - the blush of red in your cheeks, the rich colours in your eyes, the vibrant blue of your shirt. it was like the first brushstrokes of a painting, the colours spread and bloomed, saturating everything around you.
you blinked, staring at the man in front of you. the moment you locked eyes with him, you knew. he was the one - your missing piece. your soulmate.
“hey,” he spoke up, his deep voice surprising you slightly.
“hi..” you replied, barely above a whisper.
the both of you stood up, the universe revealing itself to you. for the first time, you saw the world in its true beauty - it was alive.
the museum held different hues, different shades of colours you could barely recognise, each colour filling you with a joy you didn’t know you could feel.
mingi smiled. “i can’t believe it,” he said softly. “it’s so.. beautiful.”
you could feel tears welling up in your eyes, your emotions bubbling to the surface. “it really is,” you said, unable to pull your gaze away from him.
mingi wiped the tear rolling down your face, pulling you closer to him.
“you’re so pretty..” he muttered, studying your face.
there was a pause - one that was comfortable. the two of you stared into each other’s eyes, not wanting to look away.
“can i try something?” mingi asked, tilting your jaw up.
your heart raced as a blush crept up to your cheeks. “sure,” you replied, feeling a flutter in your chest.
mingi leaned in slowly, giving you plenty of time to back away if you wanted to. but you didn’t. instead, you closed the distance between the two of you with your lips meeting in a tender kiss.
the world around you seem to overflow with colour, with the blue in your shirt mixing with the brown of his jacket. the colours in your paintings swirled, creating a beautiful illusion of contrast.
the both of you pulled back, smiling at each other. you saw his warm brown eyes, his hair and how his cheeks were dusted with a light pink.
“i’m so glad i found you,” he said, tracing his thumb across your jaw. “i don’t feel so blue anymore.”
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thetriumphantpanda · 10 months
Text
Don't Say I Didn't Warn You | Joel Miller
The Checklist - Overstimulation
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Chapter Summary | Another day, another thing to tick off your list. This time, Joel issues a challenge, which of of you will break first? Him, or you at the mercy of his hands and mouth?
Chapter Warnings | Again and as usual, this is porn without much plot, oral sex (f), fingering, sex toys, squirting, unprotected PiV sex, overstimulation (clearly), crying after sex, dirty talking, pet names (baby), aftercare, no outbreak au, no use of y/n.
Word Count | 4.1K
Pairing | Joel Miller x F!Reader
Authors Note | We are officially halfway through the checklist - this one was a bit of a challenge, but I hope you love it as much as I do. If you do enjoy this, reblogs and comments are always appreciated, and if you'd like to support me further, you can donate to my Ko-Fi.
A reminder that whilst this is part of a wider series, this can be read as a standalone if you wish.
Beautiful divider by @saradika
I no longer have a taglist, to keep up to date with my work, please follow @thetriumphantpandanotifs and turn on notifications.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Ko-Fi.
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“How many times d’ya think I could make you come before you couldn’t take it anymore?”
The question makes you splutter out your morning coffee, coughing a little to clear your throat.
“Joel, it's nine in the morning, can you let me at least drink some caffeine first?”
He’s laughing, in that deep way, straight from his chest that makes your heart swell, leaning up against his kitchen counter with his own coffee mug moving to his lips.
“Just curious, is all.” He smiles, head tilting to the little cork board on the kitchen wall, where he’s pinned the checklist.
“How many times do you think you can make me come before you get bored and want to fuck me?” You counter with a shrug.
He raises an eyebrow as he sips loudly from him mug, “You’ll be beggin’ me to stop before I break, baby, and you know it.”
He’s not wrong. You know what you’re like, even if you like to think you can talk a big game. Joel has never been anything other than focused on your pleasure, and normally, he can give you two or three, with some breaks in between, before you’re trying to crawl away from him, so you know he’s right.
“Guess we’ll just have to find out then, won’t we?”
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It’s late and you’re perched in bed, book resting on your knees, when Joel comes in from the bathroom. He pulls his t-shirt over his head, his back to you so you can admire the way his back muscles ripple as he moves. You turn your eyes back to the pages in front of you before he can catch you watching him. He lets out a little groan when he gets into bed, shuffling a little under the sheets to get himself comfortable.
You’re turning the page when you feel his wide palm slip over your abdomen over the sheer fabric of the nightdress you’re wearing, his body turning to rest on his side. He leans up, pressing his lips just behind your ear, his thumb running softly over the fabric, hitching the material a little further up your thighs as he goes.
“Can I help you?” You murmur, thumb folding the corner of your page so you can shut the book and put it on your nightstand.
“You wear this on purpose?” He asks, hand moving from your tummy to play with the thin spaghetti straps resting on your shoulder, “You know this little thing drives me wild.”
In all honesty, it had been the first thing you’d pulled from your drawer after your shower, but he didn’t need to know that, “Maybe I did.” You speak softly, moving your head to look at him, his own eyes fixated on his hand moving from the strap, down the neckline, fingers tracing softly over your skin.
Joel’s mouth moves softly from your ear, pressing feather-light kisses across the skin of your jaw and across the expanse of your throat, “I think we should challenge you tonight, baby.”
His hand moves down the front of your nightdress, cupping one of your tits in his palm as he thumbs over your nipple through the material. The soft and gentle movements of his hand makes your breath catch in your throat and an ache settle between your thighs. You can feel him pressing his hips into your side, already half-hard in his boxers, the scruff on his face scratching deliciously over the soft skin of your jaw.
“I’m going to make you come so many times you won’t even know your own name, baby.”
His promise makes you gasp, spoken right into the shell of your ear, as he trails his hand down, further down your body, until his hand is resting on the inside of your thigh, gently prising your legs open under the sheets. Joel shuffles down under the sheets a little, leant up on one elbow, casual as anything, when he looks up at you, fingers moving slowly across the skin of your thighs until they dip under the hem of your nightdress.
Joel is cupping your sex in his palm, your body sinking further down into the bed, his body pressed flushed to your side as he quickly brings his fingers to his mouth, sucking his middle finger into his mouth to wet it, before he’s putting his hand back between your thighs, that slick finger now moving slowly over your clit.
His touch is so light that you can barely feel it, but it’s there, slow, languid circles moving over you. You know now that you’re in this for the long haul, Joel’s patience is going to win out time and time again tonight. He presses his finger just a touch harder to your clit as he continues his circles, your hips bucking up into his hand at the added pressure, a whine falling from your mouth as his own moves back to your ear.
“I want you to keep count,” He breathes out, goosebumps rising across your skin, “Whenever you come, you keep count, okay?”
“I s-still think y-you’re going to b-break first.”
Your voice comes out choked and pathetic as his finger slips from your clit to your entrance to gather the slick he’s caused, dragging it back up to use to circle your clit once more.
“I think you’re wrong, baby,” He coos into your ear, hot breath skittering across your skin, “Look how close you are already.”
It’s infuriating because he’s right. You’ve spent the whole day working yourself up about the conversation this morning, dreaming of all the different ways he’s going to take you apart to prove his point. His finger is speeding up between your legs, adding more pressure as you arch your back up off the bed, pushing yourself further into his hand. Joel’s lips are pressing against your ear, the skin behind it, wherever he can put it as your body starts to shake under his touch.
Thighs trembling, pleasure blooming across your lower abdomen as the coil starts to tighten. It pulls tighter and tighter until it’s teetering on the edge of snapping.
“Please don’t stop,” You whine, “Right there, Joel, oh my god, right there, please.”
It snaps all at once, washing over every inch of your body as your hands grip onto his arm, fingernails digging into his skin, his name dropping from your mouth every few seconds whilst that perfect hand of his works you through the shaking of your body as you start to come down.
You’re vaguely aware of him pulling his hand from between your thighs and the duvet being torn from your body as he moves to settle himself between your thighs, giving you barely any time to register what’s happening before he tongue is licking, warm and wet, up the length of your pussy.
He uses his thumbs to spread you open to him, baring your glistening cunt to his mouth, tip of his tongue flicking gently against your clit. You’ve barely recovered from the first orgasm, his mouth working just like he knows you like it. He sucks your clit into his mouth, rolling his tongue over it, before letting it go with a lewd smack. It’s already a little too much for you. You can already feel the tightening of the coil again. It’s always easier for you to come the second time, but it never happens this quickly.
Joel pulls off you just enough to speak, “Come on, baby, come on.” He coaxes, tongue working flat across your clit, the sound of him literally slurping at your pussy the only thing you can focus on.
This one falls over you slowly, gradually, legs shaking around his shoulders, arching into him, fingers curling into his hair to hold him where he is as that feeling blooms and prickles across your skin.
“Fucking hell, Joel.” You manage to breathe out, chest heaving.
“How many?” He asks, mouth still so close to your cunt.
“T-two.”
“Too much?” He’s smirking when you look down at him between your legs.
“Not a chance, Miller.”
“Good girl.”
And then not only his mouth back over your clit, sucking it into his mouth, but two of his fingers are slipping inside you at the same time. As you cry out, you realise how empty you’d felt before, walls of your cunt clenching around nothing as he brought you to the edge and over it. You’re whining, trying to scrabble away a little, but Joel’s free hand comes to splay across your lower tummy, pressing you down into the mattress, keeping you still as his fingers curl up into you, pressing against that spot inside you as he suckles your clit into his mouth, letting it pop from between his lips, worshipping it with his tongue, before sucking it right back into his mouth again.
The clue is in the name, but it’s all so overwhelming, overstimulating. The stretch of his shoulders widening your legs, the way his mouth is just on the right side of pleasure, the short clip of pain that comes with being worked too much not yet there, and when you tip your head forward, look down over the expanse of his back, you can see his hips moving, it’s subtle, but it’s there, Joel, rutting himself into the mattress as he works you toward the edge again.
“Joel,” You whimper out, fingers still tangled in his hair, “Please, please don’t stop.”
And he doesn’t. He wouldn’t dare. Not when you’re so close, not when he knows it, that telltale clenching of you around his fingers, your head thrown back, mouth open, panting as you start to move your hips, meeting the upwards movements of his fingers.
You’re gritting your teeth, pulling hard on his hair as your entire body convulses the third time. You’re jerking in a way you’re not used to, just like you aren’t used to being made to come this many times in quick succession. It’s overwhelming, you can’t even bring yourself to moan, your mouth just dropped open wide, silently crying out into the air of the room as Joel finally drags his fingers and mouth from your cunt.
You bring an arm up, covering your face, sucking in heavy breaths as you feel his body moving, thinking smugly to yourself that you might have won this time, that he’s so desperate to bury himself inside you that he’s going to give up and do just that. You can feel him settle over your body, only for a moment, the bulge in his underwear brushing against your sensitive cunt. You haven’t won though because there’s the telltale sound of your bedside table opening. You drag your arm from over your eyes, watching as he reaches in, dragging out the small wand you keep in there.
He’s grinning at you, pushing himself to rest on his knees, bringing the vibrator to rest against your pussy, soaking wet and aching, but he doesn’t switch it on, mercifully.
“Are you going to give up yet?” He asks, eyebrow arched.
It would be so easy to say yes, to yield to him, to finally feel him heavy and throbbing inside you, but there’s the element of pride to it that you have to think about. Forgetting about the fire you feel settling across every inch of skin, the way there is sweat pooling across every inch of your body, and the way that even the gentle press of the silicon against the swollen folds of your pussy is proving a little difficult.
“N-no?” It comes out as a question more than anything, so you clear your throat, trying again, “No.”
He lets out a snort of breath from his nose, like he knows he’s pushing you, right to your limits and you both know it, but you’ve always been stubborn. It’s one of the reasons he loves you so much. But he’s not going to stop, not until you’re begging for it. So he presses the button, thankfully on the lowest setting, but it still causes you to jolt, to cry out in surprise as the vibrating pulses through you, centred right on your clit that is screaming at you for a break, screaming at you to stop, for him to stop.
“T-too much.”
“What’s that, baby?” He asks, smirk across his lips as he presses the button again, shifting it up a setting.
“Ohmygod,” You squeal, body thrashing about on the bed, but as usual, Joel has a hand pressed on your lower tummy, keeping you in place, “Don’t stop.”
You can’t believe it’s coming out of your mouth, but you’re teetering just on the right side of pleasure mixed with pain. Your hips are chasing the soft vibrations pulsing over your clit, revelling in the weight of Joel’s palm pressing onto your lower tummy. Your teeth are digging so hard into your bottom lip that you can taste blood, but you can feel it, that hot furl of pleasure, and you’re chasing it, running towards it, but finding it always just out of reach, no matter how much you hold your breath, pinch your eyes shut and focus on finding it.
“Faster.”
“What’s that?” Joel teases, leaning forward, his body over yours, lips pressed to your damp forehand, “Say it louder for me.”
“Faster!” You shriek, “God damn it Joel, faster.”
His fingers presses the button once more, speeding up the pulsing against your pussy, and it’s all over. You’re entire body shakes in anticipation, the actual collapse into pleasure following just behind. You can feel your cunt clenching around nothing, fluttering desperately, almost making you open your mouth to beg him to fuck you, but all that comes out when you do open your mouth is a pathetic whine, a murmur of his name over and over again, until the vibrator is pulled from your body, turned off and discarded to the side.
Joel collapses his body over yours, pressing his weight into you as he drags your arms up over your head, his fingers entwined with yours as he kisses across your face, kissing away the tears that are falling from the corners of your eyes, softly pressing his lips to the tip of your nose until he reaches your mouth, pressing his mouth to yours, once, twice, three times.
You can feel him moving his hips into your own, his cock hard and heavy behind the material of his underwear as it brushing against your swollen folds, catch ever-so-slightly on your clit as he moves. It makes you gasp against his mouth, makes you shift your hips against him.
“I know you want it baby,” He whispers against your mouth, “You want my cock, don’t you?”
His voice sounds just as desperate as the whines and whimpers coming from your mouth, his hips pressing against you, cock dragging against the wet of your pussy, finding just an ounce of friction as he presses his mouth to yours again.
“I know you want it,” He teases, “All you gotta do is say the words baby, say the words and I’ll give it to you.”
Now you’re at a crossroads. You could stand your ground, tell him to carry on, dare him to take it as far as his patience will let him, but you know you’ll be here all night if that’s the case, you’ve never met someone with the patience of Joel Miller before. Given half the chance he’d spend all night between your thighs, using his mouth or fingers to bring you over the edge until your bones were jelly and you didn’t know whether it was pleasure or pain you could feel. Or, you could tell him to do it, beg him to fuck you, get what you really want, what you always want, which is him buried impossibly deep inside you, filling you up with his cum, whispering into your ear what a good girl you are for him, and lose this self-imposed contest you’ve given yourself to outlast him.
Judging by the way that you feel like you might scream if the bulge of his cock brushes against you again, you opt to swallow your pride.
“Please,” You beg, “Please Joel, I want you inside me.”
“Good girl.”
He’s pulling back from you, pushing his boxers down just enough to free his cock, before the entire weight of him is pressing against you and he’s buried inside your cunt to the hilt. The tip of his cock is pressed so deep inside you, but he’s still, his hands squeezing your own where he’s gone back to entwining your fingers together above your head.
God, he’s so overwhelming like this. Every sense is just Joel, you can smell him, his body is under your touch, you can hear him panting into your ear as he starts sliding himself in and out of you, you can taste his mouth when he opens it against yours. Everything right now is Joel and pleasure & pain all mixed into one.
“You okay?” He asks, nose nuzzling against your ear, his thrusts shallow, so he’s slowly punching that spot deep inside you.
You squeeze his hands, in your own, leaning the side of your head into his face, so unbearably hot underneath him, but so unbearably needy too. You need more, you need him to fuck you properly.
“More,” You mumble, lifting your hips into his as he pushes back into you, “Please baby, harder.”
“You think you can take it?” He asks quietly into your ear.
“Don’t care, just want you.”
Joel’s hands let go of yours, pushing himself onto his palms, resting either side of your head. He pulls his cock all the way out of you, tip of his cock resting just inside you, then he snaps his hips back into yours, the force shifting your body up the bed a little, a cry pulled from your throat as he does the same, over and over again. Your eyes rolling back into your skull, fingers gripping at his sides, slipping round to rest against his ass, pulling him into you even more.
When you look at his face, he looks just a wrecked as you feel, sweat pooling in the dips of his collarbones, falling from the ends of the curls at the back of his neck. He hooks the backs of your knees around his arms, pushes you forward, pressing you even further into the mattress as he really pounds into you, cock stretching you so perfectly, as your name falls from his lips like a string of hail Mary’s.
“One more,” He pants out above you, “Put your hand on yourself and give yourself one more.”
“I can’t,” You cry out, feeling completely boneless and at his mercy, unable to move unless he’s manipulating your limbs, “Can’t Joel.”
“Yeah you can, baby,” He speaks, “Can feel you, gettin’ all tight around me, you can give me one more,” Then he leans forward, as much as he can with your legs hooked around his arms, pressing his mouth to the skin of your skin, “Just for me baby, one more, just for me.”
Your arm is heavy when you let it fall between the two of you. You run a gentle finger over your clit, so impossibly swollen and spent under your touch, the slick he’s pulled from you making it easier to move, but you still don’t think you can, you still think it’s too much.
“Keep goin’ baby,” Joel praises, “Just like that.”
You can feel your walls around him, sucking him in as deep as he can possibly get on each thrust of his hips, fluttering, clenching around him when your finger swipes across your clit, “Such a good fuckin’ girl for me, look at you.”
And he is doing just that, when you meet his eyes, those dark brown orbs, reminiscent of coffee and chocolate, he’s looking right into yours, right into your depths, admiring the way your sweat slicked hair sticks to your forehead, the way your eyes are glassed over, the way your body has folded so perfectly at his hand as you let him take what he wants. He’s looking at you like you’re the only woman in the world. That, mixed with the praise, and the way he’s hitting you just right with his cock as you falling over the edge, screaming his name into the room as you feel yourself gush all over his cock, all over the sheets underneath you.
“Yeah baby, fuck yeah,” His voice is deep, desperate, “Look at what you did,” He drops one of your legs, puts his hand on the back of your head and tilts your neck so you’re watching as his cock spear itself into your cunt, covered in wetness, “Made such a perfect mess for me, didn’t you?”
You can’t talk, you can’t think, you can do nothing but lie there as his hips start to falter, until he’s letting go of your other leg, dragging his cock from your tight heat, furiously fisting himself until he comes across the skin of your tummy, cursing, groaning your name until every single drop of him is mixed with every drop of you.
He collapses onto the bed next to you, led on his back trying to catch your breath, in much the same way as you are, until you start crying. It starts with a wobble of your lip which you try and bite away, then, they fall from your waterline, followed by choked sobs that you can’t keep under control.
“Woah, hey, hey,” Joel is on you in seconds, pressing his warm body to your side, hand on the cheek furthest from him, pulling your face to his, thumb rubbing the tears away as they fall, “What’s wrong?”
You shake your head, trying to calm yourself down, but now his kindness is making it worse.
“Baby, you gotta talk to me,” He urges, “Was I too rough?” You shake your head, “Was it too much?” To that you nod, because it was, too much all at once.
He drags your body further into yours, pulling you into a hug, rocking you back and forth, “Why didn’t you tell me?” He whispers, lips kissing your cheek, “You know to use your word if its too much.”
You take another deep breath and mumble against his skin, realising he can’t hear you, “I’m just overwhelmed,” You explain, “Was fine at the time, but I’m overwhelmed now.”
The cool air of the room is prickling goosebumps against your skin, causing you to shiver, “Will you be okay here for a minute?” He asks, lips pressing a soft kiss to your lips.
You nod, curling into a ball as he pads from the room, coming back moments later with a wet cloth. He turns you onto your back, uses the cloth to clean the his cum from your skin, then gently brings it down between your legs, letting it rest against your swollen pussy, the warmth soothing you a little as he cleans between your legs too.
You lie there as he puts the used cloth in the wash basket, pulling back the sheets on his side of the bed, dragging you gently over to his side, tucking you in as he rounds the bed, gets in on your side. It takes you a while to realise it’s so he’s led in the wet patch you made.
Joel runs those warm hands up and down your skin, warming you up, helping to dissipate the goosebumps, soft, open-mouth kisses pressed to every part of your skin that he can reach as he soothes you. Your eyes are heavy, you’re tired, warm, and completely spent, but most importantly, as he moves to press his front to your back, his arm over your waist, dragging you as close as you can be, you’re safe.
And the next morning, when you wake, take the pencil to written words of overstimulation on the checklist, you think perhaps that one isn’t quite for you, and that’s completely fine.
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pretzel-box · 1 month
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I really love reading your works!! Could you write something with Sebastian and a plus sized reader? :}
A little pick-me-up
Words: 1,1k
Tags: Plus-Sized/Chubby reader, reader gets bullied for a short moment, positive affirmations from Sebastian
Authors note: I feel like Sebastian is insecure about his looks and will definitely stand up if someone gets bullied for their appearance.
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Sebastian had never been one for company. In the depths of the Hadal Blackside, solitude was often a blessing rather than a curse. But today, as he sorted some of the newly recieved data in his shop, his mind started preoccupied itself with the latest group of recruits sent down to this watery hell. Urbanshade's current victims by avoiding prison time by jumping straight into their death.
The sound of muffled voices reached his ears, a mixture of cruel laughter and low, taunting whispers. He tiled his head and saw them coming out of the vent: a group of three, clad in the standard-issue diving suits, mocking you who was visibly uncomfortable, shifting awkwardly under their jeers.
"Maybe if you stopped stuffing your face, you wouldn't have to squeeze into that vent," one of the voices sneered, the words dripping with malice.
"Yeah, it's like you're taking up all the space and getting us stuck," another chimed in, their laughter echoing off the metal walls.
The target of their bullying—a chubby figure, their diving suit snug but by no means too tight—stood there, visibly shrinking under the barrage of insults. In other words, you. Your head was lowered, trying to keep their composure, but Sebastian could see the way your hands clenched into fists, the way your shoulders hunched as if trying to make yourself smaller.
Something snapped inside him. Maybe it was the memories of his own mistreatment, the endless experiments and dehumanization, or maybe it was just the sheer injustice of it all. But before he even realized what he was doing, he was moving toward them, his long tail scraping against the floor, the low rumble of his approach silencing the laughter.
The bullies looked up, their expressions shifting from amusement to confusion, and then to fear as they recognized who was bearing down on them.
"If I were you, I would shut up," Sebastian growled, his voice low and dangerous, the tone leaving no room for argument.
The leader of the group tried to stammer out some sort of excuse, but Sebastian wasn't interested in hearing it. His eyes narrowed, and the bullies took a step back, their bravado crumbling under the weight of his glare. Without another word, they turned and scurried away, their retreat almost comical in its haste. Instead they rushed to grab the keycard and went back into the darkness of the vent.
Once they were gone, Sebastian turned his attention to the person they had been tormenting. You were still standing there, shoulders tense, clearly bracing yourself for whatever might come next. But Sebastian wasn't like the others.
"Are you alright?" he asked, his voice softer now even when he kept his usual stoic face, the edge gone.
You looked up, your eyes wide with surprise. Then you nodded, though it was clear that the encounter had rattled you.
„Y-Yeah... thanks," you mumbled, your voice small but sincere.
Sebastian could see the pain in your eyes, the way you were trying to hide how much the words had hurt. It was a look he knew all too well—one of vulnerability, of being made to feel less than what you were.
"Don't let them get to you," he said, his tone firm but gentle. "People like that... they're the ones with the real problems. You don’t owe them anything."
You looked at him, studying his face as if searching for any sign of mockery or hidden intent. But all you found was honesty, and maybe a little bit of understanding.
"Thanks," you repeated, a little stronger this time. "I guess... I just wasn’t expecting that."
Sebastian nodded, his eyes softening as he took in the sight of you. He could see the strength it took for you to stand there, to not crumble under the weight of your teammates’ cruelty. It reminded him of his own battles, the way he had been broken down and yet somehow still found a way to keep going.
"People here can be cruel," he said, his voice low. "But that doesn’t mean you have to let them define you. You’re more than what they say, more than what they think."
For a moment, there was silence between you, the oppressive atmosphere of the Hadal Blackside lifting just a little. Then, you nodded, a small but genuine smile tugging at the corners of your lips.
"Thanks, Sebastian," you said, your voice steady.
He gave a small nod, and for the first time in a long while, Sebastian felt a sense of camaraderie, of connection with someone else in this forsaken place.
"It’s… it’s not easy, but I guess you just have to keep moving forward, right?"
"Yeah," Sebastian agreed, nodding a little too quickly. "That’s right. But, uh… there’s something else I wanted to say." He paused, fidgeting with the belts around his chest with his large hands, his fluorescent eyes flicking to you and then away again. "I know it’s not easy to hear stuff like what they said. But… I just want you to know that… well, I think you’re…"
He trailed off, his cheeks darkening as he struggled to find the words. The usually stoic and composed Sebastian was visibly flustered, and it was clear that he was venturing into unfamiliar territory.
"I think you’re perfect just the way you are," he finally blurted out, his voice softer, more earnest. "Your size, I mean… it suits you. You’re… you’re strong, and you’re real. And… I like that."
You blinked, taken aback by his sudden confession. You could see the sincerity in his eyes, the way he was nervously fiddling with the item in his hands, clearly out of his element. It wasn’t often that someone like Sebastian, someone who had seen so much darkness, would say something so vulnerable, so genuine.
"Sebastian," you started, your voice barely above a whisper, "thank you. That… that means a lot."
Sebastian looked down at you, his expression a mix of relief and embarrassment. "I’m not good with words," he mumbled, glancing away again. "But I just wanted you to know… you don’t have to change anything about yourself. Not for them. Not for anyone."
You smiled, a warm, genuine smile that made something in Sebastian’s chest tighten. "I won’t," you said, your voice steady. "And… thanks, really. It’s nice to hear that from someone who… who actually sees me."
The tension in the air slowly dissipated, replaced by a comfortable silence. Sebastian, still a little flustered, busied himself with rearranging a few items on the table next to him, trying to act like he hadn’t just said something so out of character.
But there was no denying the shift in the atmosphere. The connection between them, once tentative and fragile, had grown a little stronger. And as they spent the rest of the time together in the shop, it was clear that, for the first time in a long while, neither of them felt quite so alone.
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the-monkeies-girl · 2 months
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Well.. since all we have to do is ask.. could we get an imagine with Owen where he and reader have been long time friends with secret feelings… maybe throw some angst in there, and then at the end they tell each other and we get a cute makeout sesh or something? 🫣🫣🫣
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Authors Note: holy self-indulgence batman. I usually don't write stuff like this but let's give it a whirl. If it's not your thing, then just scoot along.
Title: Monkeying Around. Words: 4.2K+ Pairing: Owen Teague x Reader. Summary: You and he were best friends. What happens when he goes to Australia to film a little movie we all know and love? Taking place in 2022-2023. ** THIS IS PART ONE, THERE WILL BE A PART TWO IF ENOUGH INTEREST IS SHOWN ** Reblogs, likes and comments are always appreciated! Show support for fanfic writers!
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“Oh my god,” You laughed, clutching your phone that much tighter as you tossed your head back in amusement at what had popped up on the screen upon accepting the FaceTime from your best friend. His face was always refreshing to see; the crisp white nature of his t-shirt balancing off the darkened nature of his eyebrows and his--- You blinked, sitting up a bit with a stammer, “Owen, y-... Your hair, what happened?”
You could hear the sigh he gave through your headphones, wishing nothing more than to have him beside you to cause the hot breath that accompanied it against your shoulder. Slowly, you admired the way that his lanky wrist rubbed the back of his head, feeling the pricking of shorter hair between his long fingers as Owen muttered.
“They had to cut it for the uh… Suits. You know,” Drifting his hand forward, there was a delicately placed motion in front of the striking features he held, your vision coated with his thinned ulna and radius along with the splay of long digits. No rings or bracelets against his skin, you drew your bottom lip in, probably for filming… Your mind was quick to deduce a reasoning.
Your heart fluttered a small bit at the smile that tore against his features when Owen rested his hand back down after charading to you in silence that he meant the suit that fit on his head with the camera attached for the film he was working on and you heard the shuffle as he held his phone more sturdily and sat back on what appeared to be a bed. “The head piece, it’s gotta fit. My hair was in the way! I told them not to--- I said ‘You can’t do this, my best friend in the whole wide world--- she’s gonna kill me if I cut any of it off’.”
“You’re bald.”
“I still have some hair! Just not… A whole lot.” Playfully defending himself, Owen drifted his tongue along the front of his teeth and felt his lips pull into a smirk at your reaction. You cackled almost manically and garnered yourself a laugh from him. Slowly, your smile dissipated into nothing more than a mirrored reflection of how Owen looked. Solemn around the edges as you both stared at each other through a screen, peeking in at 10,000 miles apart from each other. It was light there, abundantly so as the timezone shifted greatly. Morning for him now, it was cusped around the evening for you back in the States and the sun would begin its departure soon and Owen would have to leave.. You would… Have to let him.
There was a small sinking in your stomach at that. There was nothing you could do to get Owen to stay, you knew now as it had been a month into filming and the schedule for him seemed so tedious. It probably was, given much of what he was doing was considered physical workouts at times.
 “Does it feel weird?” There was a drull nature to your tone as you shifted your body upwards to prop against your bed frame with a small grunt.
“Kinda refreshing.”
Earnest honesty was the way to go as Owen flashed that boyish grin that only until recently with him being gone did you realize that you missed greatly. The way it would shift from innocent to absolute terror filled in a matter of moments when he thought of something devious was captivating, the strong brow ridge was formidable now that Owen had grown a bit more you wanted nothing more than to caress with your finger tips, a strong mouth… You pouted to yourself at the feeling rising against the back of your neck.
When… did this become… Not friendly anymore…? Something… Deeper.. All things about him you expected to miss, he was your best friend but this… Owen… You missed, drawing your pointer finger against the case of your phone. “Won’t be for long, you know?” He must have seen the look on your face as you attempted to smile, “Hair grows back. It’ll be back to normal in a few weeks, I wanna bet it’ll be back to normal length when I come home.” “You just look so different,” Swallowing hard, you sat up a bit more so Owen was able to see your face properly instead of at an acutely unflattering angle. “Probably that Ape School. Got in your head, huh? Hoo-hoo.” There was piqued interest in how Owen laughed at that, baring his teeth for you and only you in the moment as he nodded in agreement.
“That’s… gonna take me a long time to get out of my head, I tell ya.” Owen huffed, “I’m gonna chase after you. I’m planning on taking the stilts they have me using when I need to move on all fours---”
“I will never forgive you if you chase after me as a monkey.”
“Not monkey,” Owen corrected you with a smug smile as he brought the camera closer to his face. Blessing you with a comedic angle that was facing upwards into his nose, you were finally beckoned to laugh wholeheartedly, “They’re called Apes, (Name).”
“Sorry, Monkey boy---” You popped your mouth as Owen chuckled deeply in his chest, the reverb itself attractive and you wanted to hear it in your ear. “Ape Man, more like it.”
“I’ll be the Ape Man to your Ape Woman.” 
“Think you can get me tuition to Ape School to start my training? I can book a flight to Australia---” “I’ll book the flight for you!” He joked, hearing a soft pattering against the door of his room. “Shit. I gotta go. Filming starts in thirty and we still gotta drive to the studio---” “Go, Ape Man.” There was an attempt to hide the disappointment in your voice but Owen was able to hear it as if you were already crying. He looked at the screen for a second longer than was needed, seeing the tear of your mouth from a smile into a mild frown. Not usually noticeable, but… He knew you well enough. Hell, being friends all these years, Owen probably knew you better than you knew yourself at times but… That wasn’t the point here as he heard Lydia and Travis chattering by the door, another knock ensuing.
He wanted nothing more in the moment than to sit and talk for hours like you two had done so many times before, occasionally even into the later hours of the morning. It took a lot to convince his mom to even let you stay in his bedroom, let alone that late but Owen managed. But there you were. Thousands upon thousands of miles away without him. He brisked you a slight half-smile that did nothing to reassure either of you.
“I’ll talk to you later, Ape Woman.”
“I’ll probably be asleep when you’re---”
“I’ll blow your phone up if you don’t answer me.” Owen chuffed, amused at the grin you gave him as your finger hovered over the end button to cut the call short. It pained you, always but it was better than letting him hang up on you. Anything… Was better than that.
“You better, Teague.”
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‘Flight lands at 3. Will you be here with mom and dad to pick me up?’
You stared at the text from your best friend, glancing longingly at the name ‘Owen’ accompanied by the monkey emoji. Fingers flicked against each other as you drew your laptop to a slow close and tucked your phone into the familiar stance of your hands. Hovering above the letters, you contemplated the answer. Months seemed to fly by without worry.
From October, into November… December… Two more and it was now nearing the beginning of March and the sensation of loss was right around the corner at the lack of contact that the two of you were at no fault for. Owen was busy, you understood that. Withdrawing was your way of letting him deal and do what he needed without you constantly pestering him. It was your choice as your fingers tapped a quick response, setting the phone down ardently face down as to not linger on it.
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‘Can’t. Busy with work. I’ll swing by when you get home.’
Owen’s blue-ish eyes stared at the message in a deepened state of dissatisfaction. That… Was not an answer he was expecting as his thinned thumbs tapped away at a response. Anything that made sense, his mind fluttering with sudden onset worry that you were mad at him. Why would you though? He’d done nothing wrong--- In fact, he was coming home so why weren’t you more excited? That was selfish, he thought to himself and drew a deep breath in, the rattling against his collarbones unexplainable. Reckon, there had been days where you two weren’t speaking. Owen’s thumb shifted upwards to look at the shared messages between the two of you, seeing more blue on his side than seeing any responses from you. 
Memes were Owen’s way of going around it, a few pictures sliding against his gaze as he clicked his phone shut, peering out the window of the airport. You’d been pulling away for months now. No doubt it coincided with his filming schedule and the proof was right there on the screen of his device. Lack of responses, you eventually even stopped reacting with the laughing emoji to the pictures he sent on set, fully garbed in his lyca suit and motion-capture camera. Not allowed, but Owen managed to sneak a few for your viewing pleasure. What was he expecting in the first place? Your undivided attention like you were his? You were just his best friend! Best… Friend… 
Eyelids slid shut. There was a small worry in his mind… What… If you found someone during that time? A boyfriend, he seethed inside of his own mind Sure, it was only a few months but you were well--- Owen tapped his phone against his thigh and sighed again, this one more melancholy than the last as he had no idea where this onset of feelings truly came from. You were you and he had no doubt that there’d be a line waiting as if he were first in it. 
He needed to say something. Anything.
Looking at his phone once more, he deleted the previous message. The ‘I miss you’ Owen longed to send in favor of a less drastic approach. Something… Less desperate, he hoped. 
‘Dinner is at 6. Mom is making my favorite ;) If you wanted to swing by.’
Owen left it open. Tapping send, he hoped… The hook at the end would garner him a monkey joke. Anything from you that wasn’t stagnant.
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“(Name)!”
Groaning softly, you rolled onto your side and peeped your eyes open for only a split second before they rested back shut. That voice… Your mom… She could wait, you decided and rolled back onto your stomach, face flattening into your pillow with a sigh of contentment. There was nothing quite like an afternoon nap. Well… From the darkness against your eyelids, you figured it was seeping into the evening time but that didn't matter as you tugged your blanket closer to your body. You’d sleep the rest of the night given the chance, better than picking up your phone and having to see what you would assume to be a bombardment of texts and maybe even a call from Owen. 
“(Name), if you don’t get out here I’m going to---” “What do you want!?” You snapped at your own mother, tugging yourself out of bed in a flurry and nearly slamming your door open as a result. “I’m trying to sle---” Peering down the hallway, you felt a small amount of shell-shock hit you at the lanky frame you were so incredibly familiar with. From the tear of the shoulders inwards to make himself appear even smaller, the long casing of his arms… The tousled hair and pursed mouth. Smacking your lips, you held up a hand and muttered hazily, “I’m still sleeping, that’s what this is.” Nodding at that, you trudged a hand through your messy hair and turned back to go into your room.
“Owen just stopped by to say hello!” Stiffening at his name, you rolled your shoulders and looked over your right one at the body standing next to your mom. “He’s been gone for so long, (Name), why didn't you tell me he was coming over?” There was nothing quite like getting scolded from her when you were still half-asleep though the other times she did this were often due to you not cleaning your room when you were younger. Go figure, you said sarcastically in your mind and reached up to rub your tired eyes.
“I---” Stammering once more, you held up your hand defensively in front of you and trailed down the small hallway into the ambient light of the living room. You ogled at him, no shame resting in your gaze as you started at his feet… All the way up Owen’s long and thin legs, the tapering of his waist the actual epitome of dreamy and the way his shoulders cascaded with strength you had not realized he garnered from his time in Ape School.
That was only noticeable up close and the shine of the necklace around his neck captivated your attention for a few moments to look at where his collar bones fused together under the otherwise pale and smooth skin you felt would be burning under your touch.  He was here. Actually… Here… Why? 
“I uh--- Sorry, mom. I must have… forgotten to tell you and I fell asleep---”
“See, I told you she fell asleep.” Owen told your mom with such a linen of recognition. You mom knew him as your best friend, after all. They were cordial and kind, friendly even as your mom constantly pestered you at times that he was single and you were single thus it made sense to want to date. 
Adamantly, that was torn down when you told her you had no interest. Owen was… Just a friend, your best friend that you lost contact with over the last few months, even now as Owen was looking over at you with what could be described as aggravated skeptical agreement, pointing at your mom with his eyes. ‘Just go along with it’, his expression said.
He was covering for you, you realized and laughed in the back of your throat at that. It was like no time had passed and Owen was chattering to your mom in the charismatic way he did in order to get himself into your bedroom with the door shut. Nothing would happen, he was always so assuring to her and even in this moment, you swallowed hard at the pat he gave your mom on her back. 
“Always sleeping, can’t even reply to my texts sometimes. You don’t mind if we go talk? I haven’t seen her in months, wanna tell her all about Australia.” His words were biting and unexpected as you crossed your arms in front of your chest.
Your mom looked at you and then back towards Owen with a smile, “Of course. Come over for dinner sometime and tell us all about it as well, I’m sure (Name)’s Father is interested in how big the spiders are down there.”
Owen playfully held his hand up and made a circle shape, “They’re huge.” Was said in passing as his taller body passed your mom and followed you closely to your bedroom. 
Your mouth flew open the second your bedroom door shut. “Why’re you here? I was really enjoying my na---”
“What a way to greet your best friend of all time upon his arrival from down under,” There was a faux accent placed on the last two words as you gave him a quirky grin. “I invited you to my coming-home dinner and you just left me hanging---” You groaned softly, bringing a hand upwards against your forehead to rub it tenderly. “I was taking a nap.” Truth. “I didn't even see your message!” Not so much the truth. “Liar,” The dark haired blond snapped at you with confidence and a smug smirk. He was right, you realized and gazed yearningly at the crown of his skull as Owen turned in your room so he was facing you properly, eyes lingering around the walls that held so many memories for the two of you from high school. His hair… Grew back. Not as long as when he left, but it was propped beautifully up and the mused tangles dug their greedy claws into you and you wanted to see how soft it was. You were just tired, you pushed that down and swallowed hard. 
“You have read notifications on, (Name).” Mentally, you slapped your forehead and looked off to the side, turning on the light to a lower hue so it wasn’t blinding you. Vaguely, you gave him a gesture to sit at the bottom of your bed as you crawled your body in and plopped down. A familiar position, this was how you two sat when in deep conversations with each other during the late nights of the summers. Sometimes, Owen would even sit beside you instead, letting his bony shoulder play against yours as you both fumbled over laughter. 
“Okay, so I read it and then I fell back asleep. You should--- Be with your parents, you just got home! I’m sure they miss you---” “Why weren’t you replying to my texts while I was gone?” “Oh my god, Owen.” Rolling onto your stomach, you pressed your face into the pillow once more. “Can I please fall back asleep and this is all just a nightmare?” Your voice was muffled as you felt the shift on your mattress and when you turned your head to peek, Owen was sitting beside you, nearly half off the bed as you were spread out, limbs flared outwards comfortably. “‘M sorry, I didn't mean that.”
“So, I’m the stuff of nightmares?” He joked and tilted his body against your own as you let out a small groan of approval at the sudden wash of body weight. It was hard to resist the small smile that played at your mouth, satisfaction falling on Owen for getting you to do that. “I don’t like being woken up---” “I considered just coming back, your mom was yelling for you though---”
That made you laugh hard as you cased your expression into the pillow again with a meager nod. 
“I was gonna come by tomorrow, honestly… I--- Just wanted to see you. It’s been months, (Name).” “I told you I was busy with wor---”
“I was the one busy with work, you think I don’t know what you were doing?” “Oh wise one,” You snorted and turned your head once more to look at him, your neck wrinkling with the unnatural movement, “Tell me, what was I doing that I wasn’t aware of?” “Am I a fortune teller now? I must have forgotten my ball in my other pair of pants,” Sarcastically, he rolled the beautiful rounded nature of his eyes and dropped his shoulders in comfort of there being some semblance of fun loving camaraderie between you two despite the small passage of time. “You were ignoring me!” “Was not!” “Even my sweet memes, you were ignoring all of them.” Owen placed a hand onto his chest to feign hurt and devastation. “The memes were aiight.”
“What about the pictures I sent from the set? You know I broke a big Disney rule sending those.” He teased, watching as you readjusted and placed a hand near your face. Lightly, you watched nearly cross eyed as Owen tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, the silver of his bracelet bouncing off what light was in your bedroom.
“They’re going to punish you for sending all that goodness in a lyca suit.” You raised eyebrows suggestively. 
“Not much goodness to be had, you should have seen Kevin Durand. Absolute madhouse. Big and buff,” Owen puffed out his chest and you laughed gently with the action, “I’m just… Me.”
“You’ll be a lot more when the movie comes out, you know. Even if you’re playing a monkey.”
“Ape.” “Will your Ape self be buff?” Owen smiled at you, cheekily at first before it touched back into reminiscence. He missed you and your comments. He missed the interactions despite forming great bonds with his co-stars while abroad. Nodding slightly, he turned his body to face you more head-on and you were catapulted into panic as your line of vision was almost thrusted directly onto his crotch. Nervously, you dragged your eyes upwards at the sound of his voice and watched his Adam's apple bob, “Why do you ask? You gonna have a big crush on him if he is?” “Maybe.” You snickered, rolling onto your back and gazing up at him with tenderness. 
Owen gasped dramatically, “I come back from Australia and you have a thing for furry Apes?” “Not when you put it like that!” Sniffling softly, you shut your eyes tentatively and drew a deep breath in, relishing in how it felt to be suffocated before exhaling sharply. “Maybe I’ll be just like everyone else and have a big crush on the actor instead. Remember the phase I went through with Andy Serkis? Same thing!”
“Well, in your defense, you could pull Andy Serkis any day.” Owen said confidently, throwing himself into self-doubt without care. 
“I’m glad you think that. I literally look like hot trash right now. I--- Would have gotten dressed up if I knew you were going to come over.”
“Leggings and a shirt are enough for me.” Owen admitted quietly, “Y’know I don’t really like all the glitz and glam. Makes me uncomfortable…” “The irony.” You teased, “Being an actor and such.” “That’s what’s so great about the role! I… can still walk down the street and act like a normal person. No one is seeing my face and no one is looking for me! Paparazzi who?” He admitted in a hushed tone to you, almost cusping around a whisper as if he were telling you a deep secret, “I don’t like that. I wanna still be able to come here…” He looked down at you with eyes that appeared more green in the ambience of the room, “Without anyone following me or speculating about what is going on. If anything… were to… go on.” 
“I don’t understand what you’re saying Owen.” You swallowed hard again, this time it got stuck in your chest. “You leave for a few months and come back all cryptic? What brainwashing did Disney do to you?” That was meant as a joke but as you fluttered your eyes back towards him, you felt a sinking in your chest. His expression was torn clearly into two camps. One of contemplation that rode against his strong brows and one of self-deprecation from the way that he was biting at his bottom lip. “Seriously, are you okay? You’re not jet lagged or…”
“Nahhh, I’m alright,” The man said next to you and lightly nudged you with three of his long fingers, “Just… Missed home, you know? You go off to pretend to be someone else. A completely different species and you start to miss home. Start to miss parts of yourself you didn't know were so important.”
“Australia turned you into a philosopher.” 
“I’m serious, (Name)!” Owen laughed ardently. Not at you. Never… At you but at the implications that your words made him sensationalize. They always did say that distance made the heart grow fonder, was that too philosophical to say to you? Would you understand what he meant? “Things…. Changed while I was there and I’m not sure I’m ready for that.” “Y’know you’ll always have me, Teague. I’m like a wart that won’t go away.”
“Right between my toes.” He played off you with such ease and felt a twisting inside of his stomach as he drew the fingers he had nudged you with down your forearm and to the bare skin closer to your wrist. “Things are gonna… Change. I’m going to have to do a press tour for this next year and then the premieres. It’s in my contract for me to be gone a lot…” Owen wasn’t sure if this was allotted information to share or not but there was no care, “I freaked out… On the way home thinking you hated me or something---” “Owen, you nee---” “I just… Wanna make sure when I get done with all of this, this whole… thing,” He gestured rather vaguely much like you had done earlier with his long arms, “That you’re still gonna be here cheering me on.”
“I’m your own personal cheerleader, you know that! I helped you keep your hair dyed when you did IT---” “This is different.”
Lifting yourself up, Owen broke the subtle contact he had around your gentle wrist and brought his hands back into his lap, watching out of his peripheral as you propped into a seated, cross legged position. “Seriously, are you okay? You sound like a crazy---” “Think I am jet lagged. Those fourteen hours are killer.” Owen deflected with a strangled laugh and stood up slowly, “Should get home. Get some sleep… In my bed.”
“Owen…” Your eyes were soft as you looked up at him, watching as he trailed around your bed to the door, “Y-you could spend the night here, you know. Like old times. I’ll sleep on the floor---” “Don’t worry about it,” He grimaced a smile for you that seemed forced. “I’ll swing back around tomorrow. We can go get ice cream at our spot.”
That was intriguing enough, your bottom lip dragging inwards as he grasped the handle of the door, “Hey.”
“Hm?” If Owen whipped around any faster, he was sure that his head would dislocate from his body.
“Did you steal those stilts from the set?”
“They’re in my car.” He admitted with a rushed laugh from you that made his heart beat that much quicker in his chest. “Why do you ask?” “Just wondering if I need to put my running shoes on tomorrow. Was hoping… You’d chase me a bit. Give me a taste of your Ape self.”
“I’m pretty fast on all fours.” He boasted. “Ape School taught me well.”
“Then it should be an easy chase.”
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021894s · 3 months
Text
— 18 I wish it was easier.. [1.5k w]
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MASTERLIST | PREV | NEXT
PAIRING: brothers bsf! sunghoon x f!reader
WARNINGS: language, mentions of oral sex
AUTHORS NOTE: it’s looking up for y/n and sunghoon!!
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your heart raced as you quietly slipped back into your room, the sound of your friends' voices drifting up from downstairs. you quickly sent a text to Sunghoon: "You go down first, I’ll leave the shower running so they don’t think anything." almost immediately, you received a simple "ok" in response. you could hear Sunghoon's footsteps as he descended the stairs to greet everyone.
"Hey guys, how was hiking?" Sunghoon's voice carried up to your ears, a mix of casualness and slight nervousness.
Saerom was the first to respond, her tone exasperated. "Horrible. I should’ve stayed home and slept."
Heeseung laughed, "Quit being dramatic! I had a great time."
Niki chimed in with a teasing grin, "Heeseung screamed like a little girl when he saw a snake."
The group burst into laughter, Heeseung trying to defend himself amidst the teasing. Saerom then asked, "Where’s Y/Nnie?"
Sunghoon, a bit nervous, rubbed the back of his neck. "I heard the shower running."
No one seemed to read too much into it. After a few more minutes, you came down the stairs, more giddy than usual, not that you were aware. "Hi guys!!" you greeted, your voice a bit too cheerful.
Sunoo gave you a skeptical look, "Ew, why are you so happy?"
"Oh, um, I just slept really good!" you replied, trying to sound natura.
you glanced over to see Jaemin and Ningning in their own little world, giggling about who knows what. unbeknownst to you , they had hit it off pretty well during their time away from you and sunghoon. not that you cared, jaemin was just a cover up anyway. you realized how messed up that sounded, but it was true.
Everyone went back to their activities. The three youngest settled on the couch to watch a movie, while the guys headed to the kitchen to start preparing lunch. saerom approached you, grabbing you by the arm and dragging you into her room.
"Are you okay?" you tell her, a bit taken aback by her sudden actions
“you dirty whore!” , she blurts out
Confusion clouded your mind "You slept with him, huh?!"
heat rushed to your face, avoiding her gaze "oh my god, you did." saerom gasped, "shh, keep it down... but yes."
Her shock was palpable. "We ran into each other in the kitchen, and things just escalated."
Saerom's face twisted in disgust. "In the kitchen? y/n , they're making our lunch on that counter as we speak..."
"Well, when you put it that way..." you trail off, feeling a bit flustered.
Saerom rolls her eyes and says, "I'll be skipping lunch, thank you very much."
You can't help but roll your eyes in response. Then, Saerom speaks up again, "So, how was it?"
You reply with a small smile, "Somehow even better than the first? Which doesn't even make sense because it was so rushed."
Saerom smirks and says, "First of all, ew. Second of all, it's probably the circumstances under which it happened. I mean, the first time you guys had no prior encounters and you didn't know what to expect. This time around you knew what it felt like and it's like you've been longing for it. It makes sense."
“yeah, i guess so..” you admit then add with a sigh “i didn’t get to finish tho”
saerom dramatically gasps “he didn’t make you cum??? oh girl…”
you let out a laugh at your honesty “no i mean i was blowing him in the shower when we heard the door open” you hear another gasp “oh my god i’m never gonna look at you the same ever again”.
you and saerom snicker when she all of a sudden lets out a “so what now?”.
“in all honesty i’m not sure. we’ll have to talk it out but it’s not like there’s many places it could go, I really don’t want to hurt heeseung” you explain to her the complexity of your newfound feelings.
“well for what it’s worth you guys can talk it out with him? seung is understanding and he loves you both. who’s to say he won’t accept it?”
a sigh leaves your lips “yeah i guess so… but I don’t wanna think about that right now. I just wanna enjoy our last day before going back home”.
saerom smiles at you, getting up from the bed and side hugging you, opening the door to enter the living space once again. you’re met with everyone in pretty much the same positions as you left them but food has started to gather around the table. you didn’t realize how hungry you were until the aroma filled your nostrils. after all sunghoon did distract you from the breakfast you had made yourself earlier.
everyone takes their seats at the table, you're sitting across from sunghoon. the chatter and clinking of utensils fill the air, but all you can focus on is the subtle tension between you two. It's the kind of tension that's almost electric, the kind that nobody else seems to notice but the two of you.
sunghoon glances up from his plate, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment before he quickly looks away, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. you feel your heart skip a beat and you can't help but smile back, even though you're trying to keep it cool.
you take a bite of your lunch, trying to act natural, but every time you look up, you catch sunghoon's gaze again. It's like a silent conversation, a dance of glances and shy smiles that only the two of you understand.
Across the table, your friends are oblivious, caught up in their own conversations. You steal another glance at Sunghoon, and this time, he holds your gaze a little longer, his eyes sparkling with a mix of amusement and something else you can't quite place. You feel a warm flush creep up your cheeks and quickly look down at your plate, hoping nobody else notices.
the moment is filled with laughter and chatter, but for you and sunghoon, it's like you're in your own little world, sharing a secret that nobody else can see.
“ningning and I are leaving early” jaemins voice cuts your little moment short. everyone turns to face the pair. heeseung is the first to speak “like.. together?”.
“well, yeah” ningning answers his question. “what about those two?” jake turns to you and sunghoon, both a little unsure of how to react to the situation. “sunghoon and I aren’t exclusive, neither are y/n and jaemin. we hit it off pretty well this morning so we’d like to see where it leads” everyone is left a little speechless and confused, not that you not sunghoon cared tho.
“aw well good luck guys” you wish them across the table, causing a confused glance from heeseung “you’re ok with this? you guys were all over each other yesterday”.
“well that was yesterday. you guys have fun!.” you answer. “sunghoon?” heeseung directs his attention to him. “i mean ningning is right we aren’t exclusive so”.
“you guys worry me” heeseung states, laughter erupting from the table. who would’ve know your little revenge scheme would end up working in their favor?
the rest of the day is spent enjoying the pool, taking in the final moments of your camping trip before having to go back to your daily routines.
The sun is beginning to set, casting a golden hue over the pool area, everyone else made their way inside, deciding to wash up and call it a night. you and sunghoon are floating lazily on inflatable loungers, the water gently rocking you back and forth. the evening air is warm, and the sky is painted with shades of pink and orange.
sunghoon turns his head to look at you, a soft smile playing on his lips. "This is nice, isn't it?"
you nod, feeling completely at ease. "Yeah, it really is."
a comfortable silence falls between you, the only sounds being the gentle lapping of the water and the distant chirping of birds. after a while, sunghoon speaks up again, his voice barely above a whisper.
"tou know, I've been thinking a lot lately," he says, his eyes focused on the sky above. "About us."
you feel your heart skip a beat. "What about us?"
he hesitates for a moment before turning to face you, his expression serious but tender. "I just... I really value our time together. You mean a lot to me."
You can feel the sincerity in his words, and it makes your heart swell with emotion. "You mean a lot to me too, sunghoon."
He reaches out, his hand finding yours in the water. The touch is gentle, but it sends a wave of warmth through you. "I wish it was easier" he says softly.
You squeeze his hand, a smile spreading across your face. “me too”
the sun dips below the horizon, casting the pool in a soft twilight, you and Sunghoon float there, hand in hand. The world around you fades away, leaving just the two of you and the unspoken promise of something more.
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