#he is such an angel oh my god
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words cannot even begin to express how much i adore this man
#caddicarus#he is such an angel oh my god#i hope someone recorded the whole show#i've seen the clip of the proposal that happened!!#and i saw the little clip of jim reading out that crazy hate mail from october LMAO#seems like lots of amazing things happened at this show.#unfortunately i don't live on the east coast where cool shit like this happens!#bro looked SMOKING in that suit holy shit#and it seems like he's picked up the habit of flashing a peace sign in every photo just like me lol#anyWAY i know i said a week ago i was writing a BPJ about TCWOC and it obviously hasnt come out yet...#i keep meaning to sit down and write it but man this school semester has been mentally DRAINING#idk y'all might have to wait a few weeks 😭#but i will say i adored that blu ray
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morning glory
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#itadori yuuji#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuuji#i cant even bring myself 2 b salty about No Megu part 4546768 bc oh my GOD#YUUJI RLY OUT HERE LOOKIN LIKE FALLEN ANGEL ALEXANDER CABANEL 1847 GEGE AKUTAMI THE ARTIST U ARE#we're so blessed we're so lucky this panel is ART i ran 2 open csp the moment i saw it#SO many s tier yuuji panels this chapter tbh but this. i dont think ill ever b over it#god im giddy im fangirling a little bit looking at it#i don't talk enough abt how Good of an artist gege is his expressions r masterful#it's incredible how much emotion he packs into stares n glances n gazes#and ESPECIALLY with yuuji there is so much weight and emotion and intensity in his eyes in every gd panel#king legend visionary etc etc etc does this man EVER turn it off ????#i honestly dont think i did the original panel justice its That good his gaze is That chilling#but i certainly tried my best :'> sampled colours directly from th fallen angel painting itself n it made the blues pop rly well#anyway if im sukuna im crawling back 2 him hands and knees give him back his boyfriend hes not here 2 play anymore FGHFGJSD
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My contribution to the Cursed Cat Alastor fandom
He is just a ✨️SLINKY✨️ boy
#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#hazbin art#hazbin angel dust#hazbin lucifer#cursed cat alastor#artwork#oh god what have i done#sir pentious#hazbin nifty#He do be spinning#my art#sketch
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#i love rocky#AND MICHAEL KOVACH VOICES HIM#I LOVE MICHAEL#i'll miss him so much in hazbin hotel my god#his angel dust was perfect#well high hopes for the new voice actor#ANYWAY#BACK TO ROCKY BECAUSE HE DESERVES ALL OF MY ATTENTION#THE VIOLIN??#THE FUCKED UP PART??#THE WAY HE FELL DOWN FROM THAT TOWER RIGHT ON HIS FACE LIKE A CARTOON CHARA... oh#LAUGHED A LOT AT THAT#AND HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH MITZI IS SO ADORABLE#LOVE THEM#LOVE HIM#LOVE THIS SHOW ALREADY#lackadaisy pilot#lackadaisy#lackadaisy animation#rocky rickaby
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oh my god. it just hit me. the time they met in eden, the first time in crowley's mind, he asked aziraphale a question and instead of smiting him or ignoring him, he answered. for the first time in his demonic existence, someone answered a question for him without any thought, like he deserved to hear the answer. no wonder he immediately fell in love huh
#UGHHHWHSHHSHHS#im sorry if im the last one to get this but OH MY GOD#LIKE with crowley saying 'just to be able to ask the questions' in job it probably means HE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO DIRECTLY ASK HIS QUESTIONS TO#GOD AND HE SAID IN EDEN 'they just said to go up there and make some trouble' and im sure as shit he asked questions about THAT but NOBODY#EVER ANSWERED HIM AND THEN AN ANGEL WHO SHOULD'VE SMITTEN HIM THE MOMENT CROWLEY TALKED TO HIM FINALLY ANSWERED HIS FUCKING QUESTION LIKE IT#WAS NOTHING#just imagine how must have that felt oh jesus#good omens#good omens s2#azicrow#aziraphale#crowley#aziracrow#ineffable spouses
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Sweet baby angel pretty boy please dont die pls pls pls i know you will be the first but i pray to clown you aren’t pls make it sally instead
#welcome home#welcome home eddie dear#eddie dear#eddie welcome home#MY BOY#MY BABY BOY#WAILS#i was on call with goon member 1#we watched the whole thing together#and oh my god#my angel#please#please go to therapy#dont he self aware#i beg of you#my dear#😭😭😭😭#ohhhh my god#eddie#😭#i dont draw him enough OR talk about him enough#but he is my number two favorite#number one is barnaby#and number three is howdy#but eddie?#Eddie you are now my number one#my vulnerable little round lad#please live for the jext update
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wrt prev post and sam’s original ‘fed demon blood by azazel as a baby’ arc like. actually that was the most insane thing to see depicted on my television especially when it seemed like no one else i knew or followed was talking about it. it felt so explicit and yet it was sooo deep in metaphor. she walked in on us. sammy, you’re my favourite. god it must be terrible to know something happened but that you’ll never be able to remember it or tell anyone about it. never be able to rip it out or scrub it clean. so azazel could get into my nursery and- bleed in my mouth? because i wasn’t clean. these trials - they’re purifying me. anyway. augh
#sometimes i think abt how i had no idea what the hell i was getting into when i started watching supernatural#i literally didn’t know sam existed. i just knew it from tumblr as the destiel show.#i didn’t even know it was a horror show initially#i didn’t know anything i just knew there were angels and it got weird and interestingly bad and meta and god was a guy called chuck#and there was this bisexual silly guy called dean winchester with daddy issues#and he had a homophobic brother#ANGERS me. rarrgh#anyway and then somehow i still started watching. watched the pilot. kept watching. became flat out obsessed in like 3 episodes.#i think i watched most of s1 in one day#and by the end i was like. oh this is good#like. Actually Good.#and i had no reference point for spn being good in especially the specific way it was good#which was a fucked up family is hell mini horror film every episode way that i really liked#anyway then i discovered samgirl tumblr when i was on like s4. And all was well#these tags r so irrelevant to the actual post but whatgeer#point stands i stumbled into this entirely accidentally and it made it so trippy to start seeing pieces come together before my eyes#csa tw#oliver talks#spn#samgirlisms
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Translation: You're all grounded
#i love that scotty was all for being the bigger people until his precious ship was insulted XD#angel watches star trek tos#star trek tos#star trek the original series#james kirk#jim kirk#he's slowly losing his mind oh my god
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THAT ONE SCENE WHERE HE CRIES ☹️☹️
MAN I JUST WANNA:⬇️⬇️
*holds him*
#hes everything I care about#hes my little angel my little precious kid I Love him w all my heart#I love him ☹️#he so dumb I love him ☹️#he so cute and adorable I love his little face hes my handsome young man I took so many pictures of him like a proud parent would ☹️#oh where have u been Lord Loki my son ☹️ oh where have u been my hansome young man ☹️#I love him I love him I love him 😭💖😭💖💖💖😭💖💖💖💖💖💖💖#*dies*#atreus#god of war#gow#gowr#gow fanart#atreus fanart#gow ragnorak#god of war ragnarok#gow ragnarok#EvilBeing#EvilBeingArt#Im drawing sm#tw blo0d#even if its drawn badly lol but yea whatever
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Killua and the Power of Wishes
Okay going to try and make this coherent because the amount of wish association all through Killua's character development makes me want to chew plaster.
As a fair warning, this analysis ended up being long as hell, and I didn't even include everything I could've said. This is also just one lens to analyze Killua's story arc with, and I feel there are other valid interpretations of some of these moments. This is just one of mine, so keep that in mind please.
One last warning that this analysis does discuss emotional manipulation and abuse, as is par for Killua's background.
Let's set the stage with one important piece of info: Killua's birthday.
Killua's birthday is July 7th, the same day as Tanabata. Tanabata is a folklore-rich festival where according to legend, the two lovers, weaver Orihime and cowherd Hikoboshi, represented by the two stars, Vega and Altair, are allowed to reunite once a year after separation. A popular custom of Tanabata is to make wishes by writing them down on tanzaku, then hang it on a bamboo tree so that the wish might one day come true.
Tanabata is also known as the Star Festival. Please keep this in mind, because I'm going to come back to it.
To finish setting up the lens for this analysis, I'm going to need to dig into the game-changer scene for Killua's early characterization - his confrontation with Illumi at the end of the Hunter Exam, and specifically, the exact nature of Illumi's manipulation of him.
I say "game-changer" because it really is - up until this point, it's kind of fair to not fully know what to think about Killua. Certainly, he seems excited to hang out with Gon (he approached him first, after all) and he's friendly enough, but he's also arrogant and claims to be motivated mainly by boredom. For all intents and purposes, Killua seems set up to be Gon's dangerous yet charismatic rival... but then this scene happens and it completely turns it all on its head.
Because Killua may have mentioned his family was controlling before, but he seriously downplayed the severity of it - likely because he has no point of reference for how awful his situation actually is other than it makes him feel bad and trapped. Illumi's appearance immediately shifts our understanding of Killua from runaway murder kid with annoying murder family to straight-up victim of emotional abuse, and dissolves his cockiness instantly to terror.
What does all this have to do with wishes? Glad you asked. Let's look at some of Illumi's dialogue.
[ID: A screenshot from HxH episode 20 of the 2011 anime. Killua looks up, sweating and conflicted, as Illumi tells him "You don't want anything or wish for anything." End ID.]
This is the crux of Illumi's (and the family's) control. Killua's desires do not align with the family trade. They must be excised from him.
When Killua insists that he does have something that he really wants, Illumi says "Tell me what it is you want", in a mockery of a certain other sibling who would have helped fulfill this wish - Illumi asks only so he can completely dismantle it. And Killua isn't even really surprised at Illumi's words, just heartbroken. You can tell this isn't the first time this sort of thing has happened.
Killua states his wish quite fervently; he really means it. But his words are not rebellious, nor cathartic. Instead, he answers Illumi quietly, as if fearful or ashamed, almost reminiscent of a sinner's confession.
[ID: Two screenshots from HxH episode 20 of the 2011 anime. In the first Killua looks down with a troubled expression, saying "I want to become friends with Gon...". In the second, his face is hidden as he stands with hands clenched at his sides with a spotlight on him. He says "I'm sick of killing people..." End ID.]
It's such an innocent, simple want.
And Illumi proceeds to make him feel like even something so simple is harmful and selfish of him... not to the family, but to Gon.
In a matter of a few minutes, Illumi breaks down Killua's wish by:
Acknowledging this desire, but twisting it into something that will inevitably fade over time, thereby causing Killua to doubt his own conviction and feelings -> "Gon is a novelty, a radiant presence who has piqued your curiosity. No more than that."
Acknowledging that Gon is someone important to Killua, and undermining this by telling him that by his very nature, he will eventually bring harm to Gon, which makes him feel as though Killua cannot trust himself to be a good friend -> "If you try to be friends with him, you will one day want to kill him... because you are, by nature, a murderer." (As a... delightful... bonus, this is also apparently how Silva and Illumi justify their treatment of Killua to him - "This is the essence of your existence and we taught you accordingly." Like they adapted to Killua's nature, instead of them molding Killua into who they wanted him to be.)
Delivering an ultimatum - to fight Illumi and win, or else Gon will die - that Killua is doomed to fail due to his upbringing and the needle in his head. Since Killua doesn't know about the needle, he assumes this is his own personal failure, something Illumi feeds into -> "You're just not qualified to make friends."
And it's the last point that breaks him. The first two shoot down Killua's present wish, but the last proceeds to shatter any hope he might've had of wishing for anything similar in the future - he has told him that his desires are weak, temporary, inherently dangerous to those around him, and worst of all, aren't enough on their own for him to deserve friendship and love from others. And the clincher: Killua feels like all of this is his own fault, that there is something inherently dangerous and wrong with him!
So, it doesn't even matter to Killua anymore if he fails the Hunter Exam. To him, he just failed the only test that mattered.
10/10 manipulation, Illumi. Fuck you, seriously.
Killua's character arc is mainly his quest and struggle to refute Illumi's arguments and to shake off the manipulation and the ways in which his family have molded and controlled him. And by far, the most difficult part of his conditioning to shake off is this idea that he is undeserving of anything more than what he is already given.
It's almost like the family has drilled it into him that wishes are dangerous. How interesting.
Thankfully, however, there are two parties to Killua's wish here - Gon, too, is a part of it, and it is not simply his reciprocated desire to be Killua's friend that saves him, but also his recognition of Killua's situation for what it is (notably, when no one else correctly identified the true issue).
"You know it wasn't his choice. You manipulated him, kidnapping his spirit!"
The ensuing Zoldyck family arc emphasizes that Gon is 100% correct: the main hold Killua's family has on him isn't physical - it's all emotional.
Killua breaks one of his shackles when Milluki threatens to have his new friends killed, but he only breaks the rest when Zeno tells him he's free to go. So, if Killua could break loose at any point, was this still a rescue like Gon said?
Well, yes - just because he absolutely could've broken out physically at any time, that does not mean he could just leave. That's the nature of situations such as this - it's not as simple as "just leaving". Support is necessary, as is actually having something tangible outside the situation to go to - otherwise there is little point to leaving at all. Gon (and Kurapika and Leorio) showing up to free Killua showed him that his wish was reciprocated and allowed him to break one cuff - this is the start of his journey, but he still has a long ways to go. Notably, he again hesitates and closes off when Silva asks what he wants.
[ID: Three panels from HxH chapter 42. In the first, Silva asks Killua "...would you like to see [Gon]?" Killua's expression is complicated in the next panel - he's closed off and uncertain. Silva continues "Be honest, Kil... what do you want?" End ID.]
Killua will backtalk and casually break his shackles and death glare his family... but he's too fearful to voice his wants aloud.
And once again, asked by his father what he wants, he is subtly set up to fail. His wish is granted, but made conditional - "Do not betray your friends", something Killua is regrettably set up to do by virtue of the needle in his head that he, again, doesn't know about. Silva fully expects him to fail and come back home, disillusioned, believing it's his own fault due to his "nature", and trusting in Silva still as a "reasonable" figure in his life.
This condition placed on his friendship is what drives much of Killua's fear and insecurity with regards to Gon for much of the series - the idea that Killua has to earn his right to friendship, and that if he doesn't, he will lose it, one way or another.
It really makes me wish that Killua had actually gotten to hear Gon's views on friendship from the beginning of the Zoldyck Family arc, because it entirely refutes this entire philosophy. He even outright refuses to go through the Testing Gates at first, purely because he thinks the sentiment of needing to prove yourself just to be friends is completely outrageous - he only relents because there is no other way.
[ID: Two screenshots from episodes 21 and 22 of the 2011 HxH anime adaptation. Gon looks up at Illumi and firmly states "[Killua] doesn't need to earn the right to be my friend!" In the second, Gon's face is seen in profile and close up as he asks "Why would you test your friends?" End ID.]
I doubt it would've truly prevented Killua's insecurity from manifesting even if he had heard this, to be honest - his issues with usefulness are very deep-rooted in his upbringing - but still, it would've been nice for him to hear, I think.
However, that's not to say that this exact sentiment doesn't come through in their interactions.
Gon, as Killua's friend, cares about what Killua actually wants and wants to make sure Killua knows that - and that's part of what makes the Whale Island conversation between them really important.
[ID: Two images, both of the same scene from HxH chapter 64, and episode 37 of the 2011 anime. In the manga panel, Gon has turned his head to look at Killua directly, who looks shocked and taken aback, to say "I like hanging out with you." In the anime screenshot, Gon has turned his whole body to face Killua, and says "I think it's fun to be with you." End ID.]
I see a lot of people chalk this up to just Gon being Gon, but it reads to me as much more deliberate than even his usual honesty. He's turned so he's looking directly at Killua, which is a sure way to make his words come across clearly. The lead up to this is Killua, again, not knowing or being able to vocalize what he wants. He doesn't have a goal to work towards like Gon, he only knows what he doesn't want - he's a mix of envious and admiring towards Gon, who knows what he wants and simply goes for it.
But this conversation makes it clear that they have a shared wish - they both want to be friends, and they'd both like to stay together. It's not about earning, to Gon, it's only about if they both want the same thing - mutual, not conditional. There's a nice almost call-and-response type dialogue here, where Gon asserts that he likes spending time with Killua (very directly lol), then shares that Killua is the first friend his age he's had. This prompts Killua to say that Gon is his first friend ever, and that he does have fun with him. And just like that, Gon replies "Then let's stay together!" and pointedly includes Killua's desire to find a goal in their, now shared, upcoming journey.
Overhead, a shooting star appears in the sky. A mutual wish is granted.
[ID: A panel from HxH chapter 64. The night sky is full of stars. In the centre is a shooting star. End ID.]
Hm. Stars. Remember how I told you to keep that in mind, all the way back at the beginning? Their association with Tanabata, making a wish on a shooting star, etc. etc.?
Well, buckle up because this star is going to make you experience so much sadness now.
[ID: Panels from HxH chapter 286. The first is a conversation between Killua and Meleoron where Killua asserts he intends to "go down in flames with [Gon]". When Meleoron looks concerned, Killua brushes off the declaration as a joke. In the second image, Killua is turned away, his outline pale, as Meleoron thinks "Why... did you looks so sad... back there?" The last image is a cloudy night sky filled with stars. At the centre of the panel is a shooting star. End ID.]
Yeah, it makes its reappearance directly after Killua has "jokingly" resolved to die with Gon if it comes down to it, after "since it means nothing to you".
I am assured, in Japanese, the word choice here is 心中 (shinjuu), the word for double suicide, where the intent is to die at the same time in the same manner in order to be reunited in the afterlife. The implication here is that Killua, having increasingly grown insecure in his place by Gon's side but unable to voice this, knowing that Gon is hurtling down the path of no return, thinks back to their conversation under the stars where they both mutually wished to stay together and, because he believes that it is no longer possible for him to help Gon, has resolved to stay by his side in death, and after it.
...holy shit, kid.
[ID: Two screenshots from the 4th ending of the 2011 anime. In the first, Gon and Killua stand back to back as meteors fall around them. In the second, they stand facing away from the audience towards a body of water under a night sky filled with stars - Gon throws a stone, which flashes in the air like a shooting star. End ID.]
And of course, here's the shooting star again in the 2011 anime's Nagareboshi Kirari ending, as well as it being the subject of the song itself and rather explicitly referencing that wish to go on a journey together, to stay together, because... Madhouse hates us. I guess. :'(
What started off as a simple wish for a friend deepened into a wish to always stay by Gon's side. This is largely good at first! Killua is able to explore and experience genuine friendship, to get a taste for freedom, and use the power of his fervent wish to protect his dear friend in order to rid himself of Illumi's needle. However, the more Killua wants, the more he traps these wishes in monologues within his own head and does not voice them aloud. Part of it is that he already feels he's been given much more than he deserves - seeing himself as a creature of darkness and Gon as light - but a greater part of the issue here is not that Killua is afraid to wish for things, but that he is afraid wishing without "compensation" will inevitably lead to horrible repercussions - namely, losing who he loves.
In order to feel worthy of staying with Gon, of earning his friendship, Killua works hard to help Gon achieve his goals, taking on the role of wish grantor, growing to do practically anything needed to support him for seemingly nothing in return - but that's not 100% true. Killua wants at least some appreciation, whether he admits it or not - it's a security thing, and it also clearly makes him happy, even if he's not great at accepting it. He insists in Chimera Ant arc that friends don't need to thank friends, but this declaration always read as very sudden to me or like a rationalization, and it's relevant to remember that this is at the peak of Gon isolating himself and self-destructing before his eyes, and Killua's own insecurity regarding his importance to him.
Killua might not mind doing things without thanks, but that doesn't mean he doesn't like to hear that Gon appreciates him. He clearly does appreciate verbal confirmation of their bond! We know this.
[ID: Two screenshots from the 2011 anime. The first is from episode 61. Killua smiles down at the ground with his hands in his pockets, the colours having gone soft and bright. The second is from episode 70 during the dodgeball match. Gon smiles determinedly in the foreground as Killua looks shocked next to him. End ID.]
Keeping all this in mind, Killua's story, or at least this part of it, couldn't have concluded in a better way than his rescue of Alluka, the wish grantor.
Now, I could probably write an entire other analysis on Alluka and Nanika alone, but for the sake of not making this any longer than I already have, I'm going to go through only a few points. Alluka is incomprehensible to her family because they make no attempt to understand her, with the exception of Killua. The only thing they do seem to understand, when explained to them, is the demands made after Nanika grants a wish - this, of course, fits neatly into their own predetermined views on "earning" and "punishment". However, beyond this, they make no attempt to understand her, and since her power is deemed dangerous and uncontrollable, she is locked away.
They are worried, first and foremost, that Alluka will bring harm to the family, and there's two ways in which this could be true:
As a function of failing to fulfill her requests, of course
Because she, just by existing, threatens the family's status quo
I stated at the beginning that Killua's desires do not align with those of the family business, and he's always apparently been more open to understanding others - he asks Alluka and Nanika questions to understand them, and treats them with respect, while his family are more so focused on subjugating anything that might be a threat. This is what Illumi tried to drill into Killua after all; never fight a superior opponent - everything is about assessments of relative strength, which leaves no room for open-mindedness or getting to know people.
Faced with a daughter who is clearly incomprehensibly powerful, and a son, the would-be inheritor of the family trade, who is showing a disturbing amount of willingness to befriend instead of retreat from her, the family made the decision to excise Alluka not just from where she could "harm" the family power-wise, but also likely to secure their control over Killua, who they then set about practically programming to not have any more wishes for himself, or at least to not be able to vocalize them without fear of loss or retribution.
The family's nickname for Killua is "Kil" or "Killu", which is deeply fascinating to me as a reader - nicknames are expressions of endearment, typically, and I actually don't doubt that here. Killua's family does love him, but their love comes with conditions. He must be molded into the perfect son, and every part of him that doesn't fit must be excised.
So: Killua's memories of Alluka are suppressed with the needle, and she is further cut from his life by dropping the "a" from his name (the Zoldyck children are named like a game of shiratori - Illumi -> Milluki -> Killua -> Alluka -> Kalluto). The nickname is also like a command or order "to kill", which is of course what they want him to do.
Saving Gon through saving Alluka and Nanika forces Killua to have to face down the last and hardest of Illumi's manipulations to shake, and that's the notion that a wish, that kindness and friendship and love, cannot be unconditional without severe repercussions - where the people he cares about get hurt because of him, something he cannot envision being forgiven for.
It's a little sad to me that after spending most of the series struggling against his family's teachings that they didn't lead to Killua betraying Gon at all, as he'd feared... but to him betraying Nanika, by sending her away.
Here is this little girl with a bloodstained past, incredibly powerful and dangerous and capable of amazing feats, treated as some evil thing by those who fear her. But she is kind at heart. Her true strength lies in healing, not killing. And she only takes commands from Killua.
Illumi thinks this is because Killua is the only one with control over her. Killua believes this is because she wants praise. They're both partially correct, but this is not the full reason Nanika does what Killua asks of her.
[ID: Two screenshots from episode 146 of the 2011 anime. In the first, Nanika smiles and says "I love Killua." In the second, Killua looks at her, stricken. End ID.]
Nanika loves him. Everyone has been trying to figure out all these complicated rules and conditions on her wish granting and why Killua is the one exception, but the answer is exceedingly simple. She loves him, and wants to do nice things for him so he can have his wishes granted. It's the only way she knows to get the love that she wants in turn.
Just like her brother, Nanika makes herself useful to earn love and appreciation from someone who accepted her when no one else did.
Even though he knows Nanika just wants to help, he still sees her presence as a danger to the person he sees as pure and innocent who must be protected. He sends her away because her "nature" is to be a threat to Alluka's safety, even if she doesn't intend to be. Killua's fear of Illumi and repercussions causes him to make a horrible mistake.
And Alluka tears into him for it.
[ID: A set of panels from HxH chapter 336. A furious Alluka glares and asks Killua if he made Nanika cry. When Killua stutters, she demands he apologize to her. End ID.]
You tell him, girl.
Oh hey, this looks a little familiar, huh?
"Apologize to Killua!" says Gon to Illumi after Illumi sends Killua away.
Nanika should not be the one punished for the actions of those trying to control her. She certainly shouldn't be forced to leave those she loves, or have to earn love from them.
And neither should Killua.
[ID: Three panels from HxH chapter 336. Alluka yells, tears in her eyes, "If you're going to protect me... you have to protect Nanika too!!" Killua looks shocked, then his eyes widen. End ID.]
It's interesting to me that this is the line that snaps Killua out of his fear enough for him to properly speak with Nanika and apologize. One party cannot receive all the protection, nor can the other only give and give limitlessly.
Killua makes it clear to Nanika when speaking with her that he will protect her, and that she doesn't need to earn affection from people by granting their wishes. He promises they will both be there for each other - Killua will praise her whenever she wants, and not just when she does something for him, but he also doesn't refuse Nanika's desire to grant his wishes. It's mutual, not conditional.
And on the heels of this "betrayal", Killua asks for what he never thought he could receive - forgiveness. And even though Nanika is clearly still very upset...
[ID: Two screenshots from episode 146. In the first, Nanika and Killua face each other, both of them teary. Nanika says "Kay." In the second, he has pulled her into a hug. Nanika is teary, her fingers gripping Killua's back tightly. End ID.]
...she doesn't even have to think about it.
I do think Killua still has a ways to go, but he is in a position right now to learn from his relationship with his sisters about balance - that love is not just selfless devotion, but also allowing those who love you to help you and make you happy too. I think that's what unconditional love is, in a way - supporting and working together with the people you love to make each other's wishes come true.
#oh my god this was supposed to be a brief write-up what happened 😭#ugh i feel like this is a bit of a mess and there's infinite other little points i could've made or elaborated on or interpreted differentl#but i'm so tired lmao#anyways tldr fuck you illumi you suck#killua is a snarky little shit but he also has so much love in his tiny body and i think we should appreciate him forever and ever#this also accidentally turned into alluka and nanika appreciation. i love them#nanika sweet angel i love you so much i hope you get all the head pats in the world#ghhh i'm so scared this doesn't make sense anymore i've been working on it for almost a week#hunter x hunter#hxh#hxh meta#killua zoldyck#call me ace detective the way i am ace. and also a detective.#storyrambles#also that one scene where gon turns to look directly at killua and tells him he has fun being with him makes me jdfhbvsdjfbvh#he's so intense about it i start laughing. no wonder killua basically just went ??!?!?!?! and like. leaned back because i think i would've#done the same lmaoooo#it's very sweet though :')#argh. gotta post. i need to stop hesitating. let's go.
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Alastor: Did it hurt?
Lucifer: *rolls eyes* Let me guess, when I fell from heaven.
Alastor: Noooooo
Lucifer: *raises eyebrow*
Alastor: *grins wider* Did it hurt when you fell for me?
#Charlie: STOP FLIRTING WITH MY DAD#Charlie: wait#Vaggie: babe-#Charlie: TWO DADS!!!!#Alastor: nononononono wait wait wait#Lucifer: 😈#Lucifer: god wanted me dead now you get to find out why#Alastor: NO NO NO NO NO#Angel and Husk *sharing popcorn*: this is gettin’ good#radioapple#or not who knows#probably just Alastor trying to piss off lucifer but Lucifer called and OH BOY was Alastor not prepared for THAT one#borrowed from a newsies meme#Niffty is already planning the wedding#two of the baddest boys#Charlie is helping#so is Angel the little shit stirrer#Lucifer could delete Alastor from existence any time he wanted but somehow decided this was more fun#Hazbin hotel#incorrect hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#hazbin lucifer#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin hotel alastor#what followed this conversation was just a 10 minute ass kicking#this can be platonic or romantic#or absolutely nothing#I just thought it was hilarious#lucifer morningstar#incorrect quotes
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I'm sorry, Spamton. I know you won't believe me, but I'm sorry we hurt you.
#GOD this fucker corrupted my gif again.#Ignore the page is missing im not gonna fix it. Hes looking at the paper. its just uhhh out of your view#made this one up on the spot lmao i dont have many inbetweens planned... if its not up to par to the others thats why#i wish i did do inbetweens but i only have the main ones planned#btw usually when he asks stuff like this he's looking for a response (im looking for a response. me.)#thank you anon oh my goooooodddd you were my descending angel while looking for an ask along these lines#this ask is perfect. Not too overcomplicated. nothing that would set him off. Short and sweet and to the point but its got nice impact.#in this context at least. I rlly needed it lol.#some were.. too much and some were really half assed apologies that go immediately back to asking him stuff LMAOOO#Guysss work with me here im actually trying to guide you to really apologize to him#[you've got mail!]#spamton#spamton g spamton#deltarune#deltarune spamton#deltarune chapter 2#Ill fix the inside of the dumpster later. its not to scale goddamnit.#Typos in his speech are on purpose to clarify lol#spent a damn hour fixing the gif. grrhhhhh....
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kinda wanna pick a fight w yuuji, yuuta, and megumi cus i know they're all fairly timid ^.^ would hate to actually upset them tho :((((
pushing their buttons is sooooo fun teehee
there isn’t really much you can do to upset yuuta…. he loves you unconditionally, so even if he does get upset, he would forgive you just as quickly even if you are in the wrong. see also…. and hear me out….. he kind of likes it, not because he likes arguing with you, but because that small part of him with a brat tamer kink gets to fantasize about what he could do to you….
it doesn’t really work on yuuji :// he’s kindhearted and strong to the point where words don’t really hurt him—he’s more focused on if/why you’re upset in the first place :(( you start a fight and the first place his mind goes to is how long you’ve been upset for, how come he didn’t notice it sooner, what can he do to make it better :(( even if you say hurtful things to him, he takes it with a smile, is so gentle while he holds you are reassures you that, “i love you, you know? you can’t ever make me see the worst in you because you’re my favorite person.” and if you’re mad because of something he did, then he’s the first to be on his knees with his stupid big eyes and a three foot tall teddy bear telling you how sorry he is
megumi… if anyone of them is gonna just get upset off the jump it’ll be him but it’s because he Doesn’t want to fight… he just wants an excuse to stew and be upset and dramatic and in his feelings. it’s why he’s the one most likely to give you space after an argument, but he’s also the one to give in first; the first to come crawling back because he misses you with his tail between his legs and a quiet i’m sorry and a cheeky “well, it’s your fault i missed you… so stay here to make it up to me.”
#anonymous#yuuji is ANNOYING! like bro just get upset oh my god ……….. he can never let u be emotionally unavailable in peace 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄#yuuta’s fatal flaw being that the people he loves are perfect to him and could never hurt him so everything is sunshine always bye#no but fr ur an angel to him…. if ur mad at him he did something wrong ofc he did he’s only a mortal compared to you
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Why not just Desmond being an angel.
And it freaks everybody out and everybody thinks he's holy or something and he's just like "all right okay why not"
It had happened by accident.
It had to be an accident, right?
Altaïr had been thrown out of the room and the Templars had unsheathed their weapons. Malik had been focused on protecting his brother, shouting at him to run as he tried to keep all of the Templars busy.
Robert de Sablé didn’t even look back when he walked away after ordering their death.
Malik didn’t know what happened.
He saw Kadar freeze when he neared the scaffolding that would lead to the treasure and Malik swore his eyes glowed gold for the briefest of moments.
Before one of the Templars charged at him.
Kadar snapped out of it and tried to block, his stance unstable enough that he slipped backwards.
Into the scaffolding…
Taking the Templar with him.
The Templar’s sword struck one of the wooden pillars keeping the scaffolding stable and…
Malik didn’t have any explanation for it.
It shouldn’t have happened.
The scaffolding started to crumble, making Kadar and the Templar run away from it as fast as they could.
And then…
The wall next to the scaffolding began to break apart, golden light coming from the cracks before the entire thing fell down.
Together with the treasure and the ark where it had been resting.
The ark broke in half, splitting in the middle to reveal an egg shaped thing made of stone that was around the height of perhaps Malik when he was sitting on the floor.
The treasure fell on top of it, shattering like it was made of glass.
Where the shards fell on the stone, the stone changed and spread.
Until…
What had been stone had changed to seemingly three pairs of wings with white feathers that seemed to shine gold all curled together.
The wings twitched…
Before slowly opening, stretching to its full size.
Revealing a young man seemingly sleeping, the three pairs of wings attached to his back. His head was resting on his propped up knees.
No one could speak.
No one could move.
Until…
“Altaïr?” Kadar whispered hesitantly and Malik could see why he would call out that fool’s name.
The man looked too much like Altaïr for it to be a coincidence.
Almost as if hearing the name, the man…
No.
The divine being in front of them opened his eyes.
Instead of Altaïr’s golden eyes, his eyes were light brown with specks of gold in them.
And Malik wondered how he could see them from where he was standing, a few meters away from the winged being.
The divine being looked around and blinked.
His eyes met Malik and his lips parted.
“It’s an angel!”
Before he could speak, the Templars all knelt and began to pray.
The Templar who had attacked Kadar took off his helmet and…
It was a woman.
A woman who was praying fervently at the divine being who…
… looked at Malik with wide confused eyes.
Unorganized Notes… I mean… sorta notes?:
Desmond is surprised for a few seconds then he goes “Be not afraid” and tried to sound super impressive “Ye are in the presence of…………… the will of God.” and he’s just bullshiting his way to uuhhh. He has no plans.
He glanced at Malik and Kadar and oh yeah, alright.
“Ye shall not harm these… men of justice for they are… under my protection…?”
At that point, Desmond knows he is ffuuuccckkeedd. Malik is obviously onto him. Kadar is super confused and just keeps staring at his face. Then…
Maria, of all people, agree and even goes as pledge her sword to him which is super weird and Desmond’s just “???”
In the end, Desmond accidentally takes the Templars about to kill Malik and Kadar with him as he leaves the temple with Malik and Kadar. It’s a very awkward journey and Desmond has no idea what else to do other than…
Oh wait… there were other Templars stationed nearby and they all saw him leave with his ‘entourage’.
Before he could try to say anything, Maria speaks for him, calling the messenger of God and that he had been sleeping in the Ark of the Covenant which sounded like a super big deal (and he can’t even whisper to Malik to ask what the hell she was talking about because the Farm was never religious and the only time Desmond even heard of the Ark of the Covenant was from Indiana Jones) and…
… why does it feel like Maria was converting people into becoming his personal army???
Oh god… Was this…
Was he going to take his own army to Masyaf???
#yeah that’s right#i’m back to my maria would totally worship desmond as her god bs#for some reason i’m imagining the battle in masyaf at the start of ac1 to be#assassins versus templars versus desmond’s ‘army’#which is really more or less zealots who believe his word is god’s word#he is not having a good time#oh god#altaïr is going to be seen as the ‘son of an angel’#asjdjfhjakdsfjkfbasjkdf#assassin's creed#desmond miles#altaïr ibn la'ahad#malik al sayf#kadar al sayf#maria thorpe#teecup writes/has a plot#fic idea: assassin's creed#ask and answer
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Some Crowley's lines that have me on my knees
And the whole "If that doesn't make you a professional conjurer, I don't know what does"
#good omens#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#crowley#aziracrow#oh god i love him so much#and he loves his angel so much#you probably can guess my love for 1941#nes posts
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"This man would hurl himself in death's way to save you. You are sure of this -- but why?"
#disco elysium#kim disco elysium#kim kitsuragi#trying to extrapolate the study#i'm clenching my fist trying not to start a whole essay in the tags about how much I love kim#acab except kim#the day i finished the game i printed his portrait and tacked it onto the wall#it's really close to the ceiling so it looks like i'm praying when i'm looking at him#I love the way Kim is written#Absolute angel#but he's also incredibly human and flawed#I mean compared to Harry maybe less flawed but just complex#the whole game is so complex#oh god i started to write alright uhh maybe I'll draw Jean next...#he really grew on me after I got my grubby hands into ao3
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