#he is one fine mothertrucker

[call-me-kitty]

I think we all know my answer so

[call-me-kitty]

I understand now

*insert nervous chuckle here*

🚂 🚂🚂🚂🚂🚂🚂🚂🚂🚂

Choo choo mothertruckers.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

[keeps-ache]

and it is a sunday once again.. my collection grows

[sootygoggles]

Parent!Paranoia Sanders Sides AU!

No explanation, but I'll probably give the backstory later. For now: memes of Paranoia being an A-class parent and a chaos gremlin. (okay it started as memes but then just ended up as fleshing the AU out)

~~

Paranoia, worried abt his kids: I'm uhhhh gonna go to my room see ya later light sides

Paranoia, sneaking back into the subconscious to check on his now teenaged children: I'm gonna leave duke a r a t that I found and thought looked cool

Duke, waking up the next morning and yelling for 'Nesty bc "HOLY CRAP NESTY LOOK AT THIS RAT ISN'T SHE ADORABLE I WANNA HANG HER ON THE WALL": !!!!!!!!!!

~~

Paranoia gets a habit of sitting on the fridge because his children were wild as kids and sometimes duke comin at you with a knife warrants jumping onto counters

~~

Nesty, who doesnt get paid to deal with duke: I'm raiding dads liquor cabinet it's my due for putting up with this

Paranoia, physically manifesting: put the key to the liquor cabinet D O W N, Honesty

~~

The lights are confused as to why he disappears at random times of the day and night and he just "leave me TF alone before I leave you a goshdarn diddly P R E S E N T while youre sleeping I'm tired"

~~

patton: my child! my dark strange son!!

paranoia, who has children: ,,,,yea ok

~~

Patton ticks him off so he leaves a big halloween decor spider on his bed and nobody sleeps for weeks after that bc pattons too scared to touch it and paranoia maybeperhaps glued it onto his cover

~~

He's like one of those people you know might mean well but ooooooo boy theyre pushin buttons

~~

Paranoia, whos fav animal/insect is spiders and whose children have tarantulas and snakes on the regular: hes not even realistic!! You need to learn to get along with mr sparkles patton!! look at him. he's fluffy!

~~

He has googly eyes and glitter on him at all times of course hes named mr sparkles

~~

paranoia gets to be a little petty. as a treat

~~

Paranoia just carries bags of glitter around and whenever mr sparkles gets duller he takes mr sparkles to the kitchen counter and he dumps glitter on him

Logan and patton are tired of cleaning up bc paranoias just petty enough to make their counters eternally sparkly

~~

"why is there glitter all over the kitchen?"

paranoia, holding mr sparkles: :)

~~

Paranoia, after AA: I hate purple but they dont know that now do they

Paranoia is actually orange the last side is purple lol

~~

Chaos Gremlin dark sides and nobody is surprised bc paranoia raised them

~~

paranoia, going back to see his teen children after acting like a teen all day: what is up, fellow kids

honesty: i am going to lose it

~~

Wrath, coming to yell at them to keep it down: why are you purple I'm purple

Paranoia, cackling bc finally I can get out of this horrible color: *snaps fingers * I'M PARANOIA MOTHERTRUCKERS HAVE FUUUNNNNN I'M GONNA BE MAKING YOUR LIVES LIVING HELL FROM THIS POINT FORWARDS

~~

duke and nesty, pumped for halloween bc u l t i m a t e s p o o k: :D

paranoia, coming out in a traffic cone costume with a shit eating grin on his face: :D

~~

Paranoia, decorating for halloween bc "oh I'm sorry it's just the *sniffles * homesickness and we a l w a y s decorated for halloween" knowing full well all of his decorations are spider and witch themed bc they all like the salem witch trials

~~

He leaves ONE fake snake in romans cereal and the lights just. Lose it. Hes kicked back into the subconscious to be chaotic with his kids, no new side, just the hours upon hours of film hes gotten from the bugs hed placed around the unconscious and a plan for the next several movie nights

He gets back and honesty is w h e e z i n g bc he was watching through the cracks and they make a fail compilation of the light sides

It takes like two months for the lights to just go insane with him around not due to yknow paranoia but bc hes such a gremlin

~~

Patton asks if he was raised by wolves and he shoves mr sparkles at patton saying "take the issue of how I was raised up with my father, a-hole!!"

He doesnt actually curse he just yells "A-HOLE" so loud his kids can hear

~~

They dont find out he's a dad until hes summoned and hes making cookies or smt with the kids and hes in a bright orange stereotypical witch outfit,,, corset and all and an apron that says "worlds most chaotic dad" on the front

And hes talking to one of the kids like "duke you can only put dish soap in your batch nesty cant digest it like you can"

~~

Patton has an apron that says worlds least chaotic 'dad' courtesy of paranoia he made it himself(read: he stole pattons good apron and scribbled over it in sharpie)

~~

Paranoia is always close to cackling when around the lights bc theyre newbs to any chaos

~~

Roman and remus are twins but roman is the kind of kid to promptly forget abt anyone and logan n patton knew remus less than a day before he "disappeared" aka ran to the subconscious to explore and theyve just kinda blocked him out

~~

Logans fine with it and actually likes the decorations tho he has asked if they had to be so brightly coloured and if there had to be so much glitter

I say decorations but hes a secret gremlin at heart and is super close to snickering at all times bc of the pranks

~~

Also yes paranoia mildly dads roman it's great but he dads in an older sibling type way

~~

So pat and logan are all "hes fitting in as an older brother well" and they tell him abt their approval of his older brother chaos and hes just like "no this is how I am deal with it nothing to do with brothers" bc hes not telling them abt his kids he doesnt trust them

~~

Hes up at like midnight complaining with logan abt how patton doesnt let him be full chaos gremlin and logan says "mmmhmm did your parents in the dark side let you go wild with the chaos" and paranoia just,,,,, looks at him, dead in the eyes, and says "I dont have parents"

Cue logan being confusion

Paranoia, who genuinely didn't have parents: my parents are mr sparkles and the cat we've had for my entire life

Logan, who doesnt know they had a cat and is now worried bc "are you taking care of it???": ???

Paranoia: it's great for keeping the Others in line tho I just say "do your chores or no snuggle time with ms peregrin" and they do their chores while I'm making dinner

logan, incredibly confused: i don't know what you mean but ok

Paranoia: yeah theyre dumb but it's the level of dumb youd expect from my idiots

~~

Or he slips up and refers to them as his children/kids and logan, not realizing they have an Actual Father/Sons relationship/age difference(paranoias abt.late 20s early 30s, remus defies all logic and has been about 9-10 for a few years now, and dees like early teens) just says "huh how.interesting would it be to have to deal with people your age that immature" and paranoias just. "Y e a h t h e y r e t o t a l l y t h e s a m e a g e a s I a m"

~~

Duke is very much baby and upon seeing duke eating glue paranoia and honesty the idiots decided to try it too

theyre so dumb dsdhdhdhjsdh

They AREEE and paranoia, after discovering that duke has the h a r d i e s t immune system they decide to test exactly what he can and cannot safely eat bc he may be dumb but hes also def a Dad and he just wants to take care of his kids and if that includes making sure that duke can safely consume toilet bleach then so be it

Duke can eat almost anything short of actual cyanide but cyanide just makes him sick like stomach bug sick

He somehow gets a fever,,,,, he has it for like half an hour and paranoia is amazed

Hes in bed,,,,, paranoia makes him soup,,,,,, hes all better and running around again

~~

Paranoias parenting rules:

Dont murder your brothers pls

Do your chores or no snuggle time with ms peregrin

Glitter is always a yes

Insults are fine just make sure you dont overstep and make your brothers insecure

all of them are printed and then the last one is scrawled at the bottom in

If you get sick, tell him immediately bc he will find out and he will be the most obsessive parent to make sure you feel better ASAP

If your pronouns/name/function change, tell him immediately, he'll make sure you dont feel uncomfortable as well as he can

Duke dont put dish soap in honestys baked goods you know he cant digest it

It's a nice system for making chaos but keeping it manageable

They're all printed then the last one's scrawled in glitter gel pen and duke wrote a reply that said (I'm sorry yall dont have as good an immune system as I do)

There was a whole passive aggressive arguement on the bulletin for the next week before it got taken down to make room for dukes art

They eventually started just putting them up over each other and using magnets instead of thumbtacks

The entire bottom portion of the walls are painted in chalkboard paint so theres no unerasable drawing on the walls and the rest of the paint is magnetic so they can hang pieces everywhere

Dukes improving rapidly tho and doesnt like looking at his old art all the time so paranoia holds onto the drawings in several filing cabinets in case he ever wants to do redraws or needs his original prints to make something in the Imagination

also bc,,, sentimental

jus a little

Yeah bc "yes my child draws nothing but blood gore and new animals but hes a creative genius and I love all of his art"

~~

Roman: anxiety I can see why you left

Paranoia: ??? What?? It's spoopy season??

Roman: there was BLOOD on the WALLS

Paranoia, internally: oh!!!! Duke perfected his blood recipe!!!!

Paranoia, externally: how did it taste?

Roman: WHO TASTES THE BLOOD ON THE WALLS?!?!

Paranoia: if it tasted like lemons or citrus you need to stay off of most foods, stick to crackers and broth- don't eat anything heavy until you're sure you wont throw it up

Patton, who was making cereal: ????

~~

Also!!!! @iliveinprocrasti-nation Thanks for helping me flesh this AU out!!!

[twistedcharismaaa]

Lost & Found Pt. 2

Summary: You’re living a suffocating life and you finally find breath in Masego.

Author’s Note: Hi guys! I’m back with chapter two as promised! For whatever strange reason, I’m pretty nervous about this chapter. I hope you guys enjoy! I love you guys and thank you so much for all of the feedback from chapter one! As always, leave a comment for ya girl! I live for the commentary!

“I see Lupita

You know I got the Jones

For my own Rashida

Can you put me on

With Danai Gurira

She stay on my dome”

Ladies violently swarmed towards the stage causing you to stumble forward instantly losing the grip on your phone which resulted in you watching it hit the floor harshly. Discombobulated. Disconnected. And maybe a little drunk since you weren’t much of a drinker. You squatted down and patted the floor in hopes your fingertips would seamlessly come across it. To your surprise, they did. But to your misfortune, some thirsty ass heffa kicked it further away from you.

“Fuck!” you yelled.

And where the fuck is Desmonde you thought.

“Ok ok, I see y’all are live in this mothertrucker. That’s what’s up.” Masego said while adjusting his shades.

He casually placed his saxophone on its stand and put his left hand in his pocket.

“So y’all wanna hear something new?” he continued completely enticing the crowd.

You stood upright and watched him in awe. You couldn’t believe this was the same man from earlier. What the actual fuck. You watched him standing confidently in his expensive velvet threads. A glorious, multi-talented giant he was. He worked flawlessly around his equipment. Conjuring soothing melodies with heavy bass drums that made you want to shake your ass a little. 

“So today I met this shorty. She was mmm. I don’t even know how to explain it. But anyway, I wrote this song about her. I’ll tell you the rest of the story on IG. Alright, let’s go!” 

“Ooh, I saw her and she hit me like (Tadow)

Saw that thing so beautiful (Tadow)

She just hit my heart, ooh (Tadow)

Full force and she got me like (Tadow)”

You smiled and partially covered your lips watching him sing passionately to the crowd. He pulled down his shades and walked towards the edge of the stage. Suddenly, his eyes locked with yours causing a subtle smirk to form on his lips. 

“I be like (Tadow)

Baby (Tadow)

Why you so fine? (Tadow, tadow)

Gotta make you mine (Tadow, tadow)

So hard to find (Tadow, tadow)”

He winked at you and walked back to his music station smoothly. You tore your eyes away from his gaze and smiled to yourself. You looked up once more witnessing him becoming consumed by his music - entirely lost in it. Subconsciously, you bit your lip and tilted your head out of curiosity. It was something about him that turned you on. You couldn’t decide if it was his swag, his vocals, his talent, or his wit but either way, he had your panties dampening from his sweet melodies. Pulling yourself back to reality you wondered if he really saw you or did you just want to be noticed? Could it be possible that this song was about you? No, it can’t be. You’re buzzed, just really really buzzed you reasoned with yourself. Breaking you from your spiraling thoughts, you felt someone grab your arm from behind. 

“C, I’ve been calling your phone all damn night! Why the fuck weren’t you answering?” Desmonde screamed with a concerned look on his face.

“I lost it! And Desmone you need to calm that tone down! I’m fine! Get off of me!” you yelled while snatching your arm away from him.

“How fucking long was that line to the bathroom?” you asked while looking him up and down.

“We should go,” he demanded

“We should.” you spat.

From the stage, Masego inquisitively raised an eyebrow watching the drama unfold between you and your boyfriend. You deserved better but if only you could see that. From his eyes, you were nothing shy of beautiful. Full lips, piercing dark brown eyes, mouth-watering curves, thick curly hair, and he loved the sound of your sweet, light airy voice. From the moment he heard it, he wanted to exercise your vocal cords in the best ways. He wanted nothing more than to cherish you and to pour back into what you lost. And maybe, if you would have him, you could show him what he lacks in this world of fame. After watching your quarrel with Desmonde, he decided that you needed a change of pace, a change of man, and a change of scenery and most importantly he wanted you. Correction, needed you. He had exactly two weeks to convince you, prove to you, and show you that he is worthy of your attention before heading to South Africa to finish the second leg of his tour.

“Alright, alright shut up. Too much new song,” Masego said jokingly as he continued his show.

------

*A few minutes prior*

“Well, this was fun,” Brittany said breathlessly.

“I gotta stop fucking you,” Desmonde said as he zipped up his pants.

“Tell that to your dick and not me,” she said as she fixed her makeup in the rearview mirror.

“This is the last time and I mean that shit,” he said sternly

“Uh-huh.” she answered nonchalantly.

“You don’t think I’m serious? Cause I am,” he responded.

“D, I know you love her. But you don’t love yourself, this is why you’re with me. This is why you’re doing what you do. Sure, you can stop fucking me. But there’s always going to be someone else.” she said as she added the finishing touches to her makeup.

Desmonde swallowed dryly taking in her brutal honesty.

“Why am I doing this? To myself? To her?” he thought.

“Don’t worry, I don’t judge. I’m not perfect either and in time I’ll face my demons but not tonight,” she said slyly.

“I’m going to catch the rest of the show. You might want to go head back to your girl,” she said before getting out of the car.

---------

An uncomfortable silence fell between you and Desmonde. The car ride home felt longer than usual. You cracked your window to let some fresh air inside. You felt like you were suffocating from the inside out. Everything around you seemed to intensify your irritation. Your tight dress, your high heels, the silence, and not to mention Des’ presence. 

“I’m sorry that I snapped at you earlier,” he said while keeping his eyes on the road.

“Why were you gone for so long?” you questioned.

“Honestly, I don’t know... and that’s the truth. I don’t know what I’ve been doing lately or who I am. And I’m sorry I’m so shitty to you.” he said lowly while his hands gripped the steering wheel.

He pulled into the apartment complex and sighed deeply. After he parked the car, he opened the passenger’s side door and opened it for you. With hesitation, you swung your right leg out of the vehicle and then the left.

“Charisma, I am so sorry,” he repeated. 

You swallowed and nodded as a response.

-------

A black satin bonnet covered your delicate curls and a white cotton oversized t-shirt covered your curvy frame. You rested your fatigued body on the cold queen-sized bed and waited for Desmonde to join you in the bedroom. Desmonde staggered to the bed after turning off the bathroom light. He plopped on the bed and grunted into his pillow. You inhaled his fresh scent and smiled at him.

“You drunk drunk?” you whispered.

A lazy smile crept upon his face and as he turned toward you.

“Drunk drunk.” he repeated.

“Des?” you replied while stroking his face.

“Yeah, baby?” he answered while kissing your fingertips lovingly.

“Are you really sorry? You mean that?” you quizzed.

“I am,” he admitted.

“I was thinking maybe we could - that maybe we should have...” you hinted.

“Sex?” he said in disbelief.

“It is my birthday….” you joked trying to ease the tension.

“Charisma.” he said while closing his eyes and bringing his hands over his face in frustration.

“Desmonde, please.” you croaked.

“We’re not as close as we used to be. I think we should try at least.” you continued.

“It’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you-”

“Then what is it?” you interrupted.

“I don’t deserve to touch you like that right now,” he admitted.

“Isn’t that left up to me?” you quizzed.

“I don’t wanna argue. Can you respect that?” he snapped.

You sat up quickly and pulled the covers off of you in utter disgust. You grabbed your pillow and your favorite multi-colored blanket.

“Desmonde can you just admit that you don’t love me anymore? I just need to hear you say it. I know the losing the baby changed everything.” you said lowly.

“Just tell me so I can move on. So you can move on.” you continued.

“I do love you! I love you Charisma … I just don’t know how to love you the right way.” he replied while hanging his head in defeat.

Before you knew it your cheeks were covered in tears. You aggressively wiped your face and nodded in acceptance.

“I’m going to sleep on the couch tonight. And Desmonde?” you paused. “I want you out of this apartment first thing in the morning and I mean that shit,” you said while closing the bedroom door.

-----

*Masego’s Video Post*

“Ok quick storytime. So I was checking into my hotel today. I seen this shorty and she was mmm mmm good. You feel me? Anyways, she’s looking at me and I’m looking at her right? Alright fast forward. So she’s bringing me towels that I didn’t ask for. Hold up rewind, I forgot to mention she works at the hotel. So anyway, she brings me these towels looking all gorgeous. And y’all know me, imma shoot that shot. So I did and I found out shorty had a boyfriend. And that sums up how “Tadow” came about. I made it right after I seen her.”

------

Part 1 Part 3

@l-auteuse @nizzle-mo @jamielennkeeler @thickemadame @ljstraightnochaser @pineappear @thadelightfulone @qweentbh @justanothernerdgirl @big-brows-bigger-dreams @ghostfacekill-monger​ @chaneajoyyy​ @soulfood-fics​ @miss-nneka​ @rosemilage @sarcastic-sunshines @mygirlrenee @keiva1000

[tiny-opal-essence]

Pocket Paladin Chpt 15

Mind-Meld Memories

“Alright everyone, seeing as we have one paladin too many for our usual mind-meld training, Pidge has designed a new version of it,”  Coran said.

‘Hear that?  You’re an extra, unnecessary paladin.’

Well, I’m still a paladin, so *pbbt*.

‘Sticking your tongue out at your own thoughts?  How mature.’

“Would you care to explain, Pidge?”

“Sure.  Basically, with this new software, we can train in different types of terrain and weather, all simulated by our minds.  While in the mind meld, we will feel everything, like temperature, wind, pain.  If something in the training would kill you in a real fight, you would just be knocked out of the mind meld until the end of the simulation.”

“Cool, but how is that going to help me?  I’m still going to be 3 inches tall in the simulator.”

“Actually, you won’t be.  You can think of yourself being back at your normal height while in the mind meld according to Pidge.”  Shiro commented.

“Wait, seriously?”

“That will let you be a bigger help during training.  *gasp* No pun intended.”  Allura put her hand in front of her mouth in shock.

“Don’t worry about it, Allura.  I know you didn’t mean it like that.”

‘Are you sure about that?’

“You said we would feel everything in the simulation.  If we get a cut during training, would that show up on our actual bodies?” Keith asked.

“No, it wouldn’t.  There shouldn’t even be any residual pain from it when you’re out of the mind meld.”  Pidge answered.

“Oh thank God.” Hunk said in relief.

“Any other questions?  No?  Let’s get started.”  Pidge said as everyone put on their helmets.

It was dark for a few seconds as the program booted up.  Once it did, Lance had to close his eyes from the bright light.  As his eyes adjusted to the light, he saw that things looked smaller.  That is, they looked normal.  The trees towering over him didn’t make him feel as small as before.  When he touched the trunk of the tree, he could feel how rough it was, as if he really were in a forest.  The scent of pine was heavy in the air.  The snow *crunched* under his feet and he could see his breath.

He continued to look around and saw the rest of his teammates pop into existence in the simulation.  They were the same height as him.

“Oh my gosh, Pidge, you were right!  I’m normal size!  Thank you, thank you, thank you!”  Lance ran over and hugged the now shortest paladin.

“Yeah, yeah.  Glad you’re enjoying it, Lance.”  She responded with a grin.

No one noticed the soft, fond smile on Keith’s face when he saw how happy Lance was.

Lance let go of Pidge and was immediately grabbed in a hug by Hunk.

“Oh, I’ve missed being able to do this.”

“Same here, big guy.”  Lance hugged him back.

It’s nice to get an actual hug.  Nothing against the “hand hugs”, but they don’t compare to the real thing.  Plus with an actual hug, they’re not worried about hurting me.  Speaking of hurting me…

“Hunk, I can’t breathe.”

“Sorry, Lance!”  Hunk exclaimed as he quickly let go.  

“Hey, it’s fine.  Never apologize for how strong of hugs you give!”

“This simulation is incredible,” Shiro said as he looked around.

“You can actually feel how cold the snow is,” Allura added on while sticking her hand in a snowbank.

“It must have taken a long time to design all this,” Keith commented.

“It did, but it’s worth it, right?”  Pidge asked smugly.

“Paladins, can you hear me?” Coran’s voice sounded in the comms.

“Loud and clear, Coran,” Shiro responded.

“Wait, Coran, are you in the simulation too?”  Lance asked.

I didn’t see him put on a helmet.

“No, I just get to control the simulation and see what the 6 of you are seeing,”  Coran answered.

“This isn’t going to be like when you were the loremaster during Monsters and Mana, is it?”

“I promise I won’t be as devious or mad with power.”

“Monsters and Mana?” Keith asked.

“Oh, it’s this cool game we played while you were with the Blade.  You get to create a fantasy character and go on a quest.  The loremaster lets you know how difficult each task is and you roll a die to see if you accomplish it or not.”  Lance explained.

“Sounds…complicated.”

“It’s not once you get used to it.  It’s a lot of fun.  We should play it sometime.”

“You wouldn’t even need a hologram of your character, you could be the game piece yourself while you’re like this.”

“You’re right Pidge!  *gasp* It would be just like when they played giant wizards chess in the first Harry Potter movie!  That would be so cool!”

“Didn’t Ron almost die during that?”  Keith asked, concerned about Lance.

“Yeah, but Monsters and Mana is a hologram.  Lance wouldn’t have anything to worry about.”  Pidge answered.

“Wait, you’ve seen Harry Potter, but you’ve never heard of Guardians of the Galaxy?”

“Yeah?  What of it?”

“Nothing.”

You’re a hard guy to figure out, Keith.

“Alright.  Is everyone adjusted to the simulation?”

“Yes.” The paladins chorused.

“Good.  Now, your first mission in the simulator is going to be a simple rescue, just to test the programming.  Prince Apollonia has been taken by the Morris Day 6.  You need to figure out where they took him and free him.”  Coran declared.

“Shouldn’t we be practicing fighting Lotor?” Shiro asked.

“Yes, but I need to get more data on how his team works to get an accurate model of them in the simulator,”  Pidge explained.  “Once I do get that, we’ll be able to train to fight them.  For now, we make do with generic villains.”

“We should start looking for clues as to where the Prince may have been taken.” Allura declared.

“How about a couple sets of footprints heading that way?” Lance pointed in the direction the tracks in the snow went.

“Good eye, Lance,” Keith said.

“Guess you guys can call me ‘Eagle Eye Lance’ from now on.”  Lance did his finger-gun thing.

“Nope.  Not doing that.”  Shiro stated.

“Let’s see where these go.” Hunk said as the group started following the tracks.

It was silent on their walk save for the *crunch* of the snow.  They soon arrived at the edge of a clearing.  In the center of it was a tent.  There were 5 girls standing guard of it.

“Coran, I thought you said they were the Morris Day 6.  There’s only 5.”

“Lance, use the heat vision on your scope,”  Allura recommended.

“But I don’t have my bayard, remember?  It wasn’t affected by the spell.”

“Well, here in the simulation, you have your bayard.  You’re the only one that has heat vision, so can you please use it so we can see if Prince Apollonia is in the tent?”  Pidge stressed the please.

“Ok, ok.”

Touchy.  Alright, how do I get this to activate again?

“What are you waiting for Lance?” Pidge asked.

“Give me a sec.  It’s been a while since I’ve used this.”

The bayard turned into a gun in his hands.

Ok, good.  Now how does heat vision work on this thing?  Oh yeah!

Lance looked through the scope.  “I see two people in the tent.  It looks like one of them is walking around the other one.  The other one’s just sitting there.”

“That’s more than likely Prince Apollonia,” Shiro commented.

“And the one circling him must be the 6th member of the Morris Day 6,” Allura added on.

“Only question is, how do we get him out of there?” Keith wondered out loud.

“Maybe we could do a distraction.  Divide their forces.  It would make it easier to get close.”  Lance suggested.

“Sounds like you just volunteered,”  Pidge smirked.

“I did not!”

“Mmm, you kind of did, Lance.” Hunk also smirked at Lance.

“Hey, we don’t gang up on teammates,”  Shiro said.

“But he makes it so easy.” Pidge teased.

“Just for that, you two get to go with him.”

“But-“

“No buts.”

Pidge and Hunk both *groaned* out loud.  

‘They don’t want to work with you.  Working with you is a punishment.’

Lance tried to not focus on those thoughts as the garrison trio walked around to the other side of the clearing.  They let the others know when they were in position.

“Everyone ready?”

“Initiate operation lost in the woods.” Hunk said.

“~OH NO, I AM A SMALL CHILD WHO HAS BECOME HELPLESSLY LOST IN THE WOODS.  WOE IS ME.~”  Pidge yelled out towards the Morris Day 6.  “I still don’t get why I have to be the child lost in the woods.  Lance’s voice carries more.”

“Yeah, but you look more like a small child.”  Hunk said.

“I resent that!”  Pidge hissed out.

“What Hunk’s trying to say is that they won’t expect anything from you-”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” Pidge had a bite in her tone.

“-so you can kick their butts and prove them wrong at the same time.” Lance finished saying.

“Didn’t like where that sounded like it was going, but I like where it wound up,”  Pidge commented.

“You have to yell again, Pidge.  They’re not moving from their position yet.”  Allura said over the comms.

“Uggh, fine.  ~THIS IS THE QUICKEST WAY TO THE MARKET.  MOTHER SAID THAT I SHOULDN’T TAKE THE SHORTCUT THROUGH THE WOODS WHILE CARRYING SUCH PRECIOUS CARGO, BUT I AM SO TIRED OF CARRYING ALL OF THIS GOLD.  AND NOW I AM LOST.  WHAT IS A GIRL TO DO?  BUT LOOK!  THERE’S A CLEARING UP AHEAD.  PERHAPS I WILL FIND SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP ME.  I CERTAINLY HOPE THERE AREN’T ANY THEIVES OR RUFFIANS THERE.  I HAVE NO WAY OF DEFENDING MYSELF~.”

“It’s working Pidge!  We’ve got 3 of them coming our way.”  Lance focused the scope on the approaching targets.  The 3 members of the Morris Day 6 got closer.

“Hello, little one.  You look lost.” One of the three knelt in front of Pidge while the other two remained upright.

“Oh, I’m not lost.” Pidge had a smirk on her face.  “Now!”

Hunk and Lance jumped down from their respective trees onto the two standing kidnappers.  Pidge took the last one down with an uppercut from her bayard.

“Alright!  We took care of three of them.  Let’s get the other ones.”

“Wait, I’ve got an idea,” Lance said as they looked at the unconscious members of the Morris Day 6.  “Sweater swap!”

“Is now really the time to be thinking about that, Lance?” Pidge asked.

“No, that’s not what I’m saying.  More along the lines of ‘Disguise mothertrucker!’, like that old vine.”

“Isn’t it ‘Disguise Motherfucker!’?”

“*gasp* Pidge, you can’t use language like that in front of a child!  Shiro’s only 6, you know how impressionable children are at that age!” Hunk said with mock offense.

“Really?  We’re bringing up me being a leap year baby again?”  

“Can we focus back on the mission?  What were you thinking, Lance?” Allura said through the comms.

“Me and Hunk can put on these guys’ cloaks and sneak up on the other two standing guard outside the tent and take them down.”

“What about me?” Pidge asked.  “Don’t I get to be a part of the sweater swap?”

“It would look suspicious if one of the three shrunk.” Hunk said.

“It would look suspicious if only two of the three returned.”

“She has a point,” Keith commented.

“Yeah, that would be more suspicious I guess.” Lance agreed.

“Let’s grab their weapons.”

The three of them quickly tied up the unconscious kidnappers and took their cloaks and weapons.  They then quickly made their way to the tent.

“Where is the gold that child was yelling about?”  One of the two guards asked.

“What gold?  Oh, yeah, it turns out, there wasn’t any gold.” Hunk nervously said.

The guards looked at each other.

“What he’s trying to say is that it was a trap.  Some common thieves in the area looking to make a quick buck.  But we showed them.”  Lance quickly said.

“And what did you do with your adversaries?”  The guard on the left asked.

“We left them tied up to a tree.  They’ll know better than to cross the Morris Day 6 again.”  Pidge answered.

“Interesting.”  The guard on the right said.

“You sound different since you came back.”  The left guard added on.

“Oh, you know, we’re just a bit out of breath, that’s all,” Hunk responded.

“Really?  Your voice just dropped a whole octave because of adrenaline?  Is that what you’re saying?”  The right guard said.

“Yes, that’s exactly what he’s saying.”

The guards pointed their weapons at the three of them.

“You are not our teammates.  Everyone knows the Morris Day 6 is an all-female group.”  The left guard said.

“You kept referring to yourselves as male, proving beyond doubt that you are imposters.”  The right guard added.

“Oh no, how could these two have tricked me?  In all the chaos, I must have mistaken them for who they claimed to be.”  Pidge tried to lie her way out of the situation.

“You are an imposter too.  Did you think we would not recognize the voice of the one who called out?”

“Oh quiznak.” All 6 of the Paladins said in unison.  They could also hear Shiro face-palm through the comms.

The two guards began to fire at the three standing in front of them.

“We’re on our way,” Keith said as the rest of the group ran to support their other members in the field.

Lance, Hunk, and Pidge managed to avoid being shot and were able to take the left guard down.

“Leader, we have a situation!” the right guard yelled before firing once more at Lance.

Lance wasn’t able to get his shield up in time and braced himself to get hit all the while thinking-

Oh please don’t let me get hit by another weird space thing.

And he wasn’t.

“Lance?  Where are you?” Hunk looked around but didn’t see his friend.

“Did Lance get hit, Coran?” Pidge took down the right guard.

“No, he’s still there with you.”

“Down here!”

The others had joined the group at that time and looked down.

“I guess I thought myself small so I wouldn’t get hit,” Lance said.

The others started to approach but stopped when the remaining member of the Morris Day 6 emerged from the tent, holding Prince Apollonia in front of her as a human, err, alien shield.  She was holding a ray gun to his head.

“You take one step closer, and Princey here is finished.” She said as she started moving towards the group.

Lance was still slightly dizzy from suddenly changing height.  He was also on the ground in the space between his team and the leader of the Morris Day 6, who was unaware of his presence.

Keith was torn.  They had a mission to do, but if they moved, the leader would kill the Prince.  But the leader kept getting closer to Lance, and they couldn’t warn him to get out of the way without alerting her to his presence.  If he tried to attack her, she could kill the target and the ensuing fight could kill Lance.  Even though it was a simulator, Keith didn’t want Lance to feel what it was like to die.  Even if it wasn’t permanent.

Finish the mission, or protect Lance?  Mission?  Lance?  Mission?  Lance?  Why is Lance in my thoughts so much?  There has to be a way I can protect Lance without jeopardizing the mission.

Keith didn’t have to worry about that choice in the end.  The leader was suddenly flipped onto her back as she let go of the Prince.  Standing in front of her was Lance at his normal height with his right fist raised to the sky.

“And boom goes the dynamite!” Lance said.

“How did you…?” Allura started to ask.

“Oh, I just thought myself big again.  And it was so cool!”

“Yeah, and we saved the Prince.”

“I thank thee all for thy bravery and courage.  Now, I must returneth home to Lake Minnetonka along First Avenue.  I pray that we meeteth again on a better occasion.”  Prince Appolonia spoke before disappearing.

“Woohoo!  We won the simulator.”  Lance yelled out.

A red X suddenly appeared over everyone’s head.  

“What does that mean, Pidge?” Keith asked as he poked at the one over his head.

“That means we failed the simulator.”

“But we saved the Prince,”  Allura questioned.

“You did, yes, but Lance cheated,”  Coran said through the comms.

“How did I cheat?”

“By changing your height at will.”

“But the first time wasn’t intentional.”

“But the second time was.” Coran pointed out.  “While in the simulator, you need to act as you would in real life, not depend on the unique things that you can do while in it.”

“I would say that I used my resources wisely.”

“Wait, if Lance can choose his height at will in the simulator, does that mean we could too?” Hunk asked.

“I don’t see why that would be important,” Shiro said.  “Lance’s cheating means we lost.  We shouldn’t cheat the system.”

“Yeah, but if we can change our heights too, we could see from his perspective.”

“So, we could see what it’s like to be tiny?”  Keith asked curiously.

“Yes, exactly, Keith!” Hunk said excitedly.  “You guys can’t say you haven’t honestly thought about what the world looks like for him while he’s like this, right?”

“It’s crossed my mind a little bit,” Shiro responded honestly.

“I already have a bit of an idea what it’s like thanks to my link with the space mice, but it would be interesting to know more,”  Allura commented.

“I’m curious,” Pidge said.

“Me too.” Keith agreed.

“Well, if we all think ourselves tiny, we could see how Lance sees the world!”

“Maybe before we do that we could get Coran to change the scenery, to somewhere more familiar?” Lance suggested.  “It might help everyone be more comfortable.”

“Just a tic.”

Their surroundings fizzled out, leaving them in a black void.  Soon enough, they found themselves in the living room area of the Castleship.

“Does this work?”

“Yep.  Thanks, Coran.” Lance responded.

“So…how do we do this?” Hunk asked.

“I don’t know.  I was just thinking about not wanting to get hit by the guns.  Maybe think small thoughts?”

“Better than nothing,” Pidge said as she and the others all closed their eyes to concentrate.  

Lance soon saw his friends begin to shrink before his eyes.

“It’s working!  Keep going, guys.”

Smaller and smaller they became as they thought small thoughts.  Lance continued to stare down at them as they stopped.  They opened their eyes and shook away the blurriness of their vision.  As they looked up at Lance, they all back-pedaled, unprepared for how intimidating he looked.

Is that what I looked like that first morning when I almost… Keith thought.

“Oh my God,” Pidge said.

“Yeah, that’s intense.” Hunk commented.

“Oh, sorry.  Didn’t think about what I would look like from that perspective.”  Lance gently kneeled on the ground in front of them, though the ground still shook slightly.  “Is this better?”

The others nodded their heads.

“Is this what it felt like when you first shrunk?” Allura asked.

“That depends.  How are you guys feeling?”

“Intimidated,” Allura answered.

“Scared,” Keith said.

“Freaking out,” Hunk added.

“Nervous, but curious,” Pidge responded.

“Overwhelmed,” Shiro stated.

“Then you’re all definitely feeling what I did.  Don’t know if that’s good or not, but we all understand the situation.  Do you guys have any questions?”

“How do you handle all of those feelings?” Keith asked.

“I just try to focus on the happy thoughts and how nice it’s going to be to be back to normal.”

“Would you be willing to pick me up?  I want to know what it feels like.” Pidge asked.

“Um, sure,”  Lance said as he brought his hand down flat in front of the rest of the team.

“Is that what it looks like when we get ready to pick you up?” Hunk said with a hint of nervousness.

“Yeah…”

“Cause that’s kind of terrifying.”

“I’ve gotten used to it.” Lance shrugged.

Pidge hesitatingly climbed on his hand while Lance struggled not to twitch too much.

“Ok, I totally get what you were saying before, Keith.  It does feel kind of weird having someone climb on your hand.” Lance commented.

“Weird from my end too,” Pidge added.  

“Any other takers?”

“Sure.” Hunk said as he approached the hand.

“I’m in,” Keith responded.

“Me too,”  Allura said.

“Same here,” Shiro said.

Lance brought his other hand down as well so everyone could fit on them comfortably.

“You guys sure are a handful.”  He joked as he started slowly lifting them up to the counter.

“Good one, Lance!”  Hunk responded with only a hint of nervousness while the others *groaned* at the pun.  Hunk then decided to look down as the group was carried up.  “Ok, looking down was a mistake.” He said as he scooted back towards the middle of Lance’s hands.

“Yeah, it can be a bit overwhelming the first few times,” Lance commented.

“A bit?!” Hunk looked up at Lance.

“You didn’t think I got used to it just like that, right?” Lance responded.

He was extra careful as he placed his hands down on the surface.  He stayed kneeling while everyone stepped off.  He noticed that they were shaking slightly.

“My legs feel like Jell-O,” Pidge said.

“I feel like I just stepped off a rollercoaster,” Keith added.

“Really?  ‘Cause I was going a lot slower than when I pick up the space mice.  *gasp* Does this mean they feel like that whenever we pick them up?”  Lance worried out loud.

“No, if there was anything any of us were doing that affected the space mice like this, they would have told me,”  Allura answered.

“I think it’s just because we’re just not used to being this height,”  Shiro added on.

“Just give us a minute to get our counter, err, table legs, no, umm…” Keith’s face scrunched up in thought.  “Our land legs back.”

Keith looks cute like this.  I wonder if he thinks I look cute at 3 inches tall?

‘You already know the answer to that.  No.’

Yeah, I know he’s straight.  All the girls just flocked around him at the garrison.  And he never dated any of them, which just made them want him more.

‘Remember Gretchen Smith?  And how she only went out with you to try to make Keith jealous?  How she never actually liked you?’

Yeah, I remember how she was a total Beotch.

‘But you still felt like Keith took something from you, causing you to make up this rivalry, to try to prove you actually are worth something.  But you were never good enough on your own.  Even before you were shrunk you always needed help.’

Shut up!  I’m over Gretchen, and I’m over the rivalry.  Me and Keith are friends.  I wish we were more, but I know he’s straight.  There’s no way he would ever go out with me.  That’s never going to happen!

“Lance, are you ok?” Lance realized Keith was looking right at him.

“Hmm?  Oh, yeah, I’m good.  Just lost in thought.”

Hopefully I wasn’t doing a face journey.

“You guys find your land legs?”

They all nodded.

“Yeah, but I think I’m ready to be back to normal height,” Pidge commented.

The others voiced their agreement and thought themselves back to normal.  As soon as Hunk was back to normal height, he wrapped Lance in a hug.

“I’m so sorry if we’ve ever been too rough with you while you’re shrunk.”

“It’s ok, Hunk.  Once everyone got the hang of things it’s been fine.”

“We’re all going to try and be more gentle with you while you’re like this,” Shiro said.

“I agree.  Now, thanks to the simulator, we have a better grasp of what this situation is like for you.” Allura added on.

“Thanks guys, but you’re doing great already.  You don’t have to change anything, please.” Lance really wanted his friends to stop worrying about him.

“Alright, Paladins.  I’m going to bring you out of the mind meld now.” Coran stated.

Everyone closed their eyes for a few seconds and opened them back up to reality.  They blinked as their eyes adjusted.

Lance wished he could have stayed in the mind meld a little longer.  It was nice being back to his normal height, even if it was only a simulation.

Now back to reality with tiny Lance.  Wahoo.  Can’t you just feel the excitement?  At least my floating tray’s fixed now.

He managed to hide how he was feeling from the others.

“Who’s ready for lunch?”  Hunk asked.  “I made more pastelitos for the team per Lance’s request.”

“Yes!  Thank you, Hunk!”

Winner winner pastelito dinner!

“Lunch sounds good,”  Shiro said.

“We can continue to work with the simulator afterwards,”  Allura stated.

“I’ll meet you guys in the kitchen in a bit,”  Pidge called over her shoulder as she walked towards the console.  “I’ve got some updates for the simulator.”

“This is the first time we’ve used it and it worked fine.  How can you already have updates?” Keith asked.

“Just because something works doesn’t mean it can’t be improved.”

“Alright, Shuri.”  Hunk teased.

“That counts as your final guess, Hunk.”

“No, it doesn’t.  Come on Pidge.  It’s the last day of the bet.  Let me have another chance to guess your real name, please?”

“Fine.  One last chance after lunch.  Then we’ll see who’s 20 GAC richer.”

“Deal.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“It looks like the rain’s stopped,” Axha said as she looked up to the sky.

“I bet Kova’s glad it was only a small shower and not a downpour.” Ezor looked over at Kova who did not look happy to be in the rain, no matter how light it was.

Narti was petting Kova to calm him down while he perched on her shoulder.  A drop of rain fell from the thick foliage and landed right on Kova’s head, causing him to *hiss* and dig his claws into Narti’s armor.  She got an amused look on her face at this.

“How much longer do you think Lotor’s going to be?” Zethrid asked as she tried to help Kova calm down.

“He’s relaying the message to our allies on the neighboring planet.  There’s a lot of details to get down for the plan to work.  It could be a while.”  Axha answered.

“What even is the plan anyways?  Lotor hasn’t really told us much.  Maybe like 12% of the plan.” Zethrid wondered.

Narti shrugged making sure that Kova didn’t fall off her shoulder.

“The more people that know about a plan, the more likely things are to go wrong.  I’m sure he’ll tell us more when he can.” Axha said with blind trust.

“I stopped trying to figure out Lotor’s plans a long time ago.  All I heard was that we got the rest of the quintant to relax and that’s exactly what I plan to do now that there’s a break in the rain.” Ezor commented.

They continued walking through the forest until they found themselves on a ledge overlooking a lake.

“Do you think it’s safe to swim in?” Ezor asked as she looked down.

“One way to find out!” Zethrid quickly ran up behind Ezor and lifted her into a princess carry.

“Zethi, what are you doing?” Ezor laughed as Zethrid ran closer to the end of the ledge.  “Babe, stop, no, no, no!  Wooooh!” Ezor continued to laugh as she clung tighter to Zethrid as she lept off the ledge and down into the lake below.

Narti and Axha looked over the edge and saw Zethrid and Ezor resurface in a fit of giggles.

“Come on you two!  The water’s great!” Ezor called up.

Axha and Narti both took a step back from the edge.

“Do you want to go first, Narti?”

Narti pointed at Kova who was just not having it.

“Come on, Axha.”

“Yeah, stop being such a stick in the mud!”  Ezor and Zethrid continued to taunt from below.

“See you down there, Narti.”

Narti and Kova both nodded in response to Axha before starting down a path to the shoreline below.

Axha stepped onto the edge and took a deep breath.  She dove off the ledge and did a nearly perfect swan dive.

“Nice, Axha!” Ezor commented when she resurfaced.

“Show off.”

Axha splashed some water in Zethrid’s face in good fun.

“Oh, it’s on!”

By the time Narti and Kova found their way down to the shore, it was a full-on splash war.  Narti managed to find a relatively dry patch of the forest floor for Kova to lay in before joining the others.  It had been a while since they had had an opportunity to relax and they planned to enjoy it as long as possible.  

Half a varga later, they were all floating aimlessly in the lake.

“It’s too bad we weren’t able to grab him before his team found him,”  Zethrid commented.

“Yeah, there was no way he could get out of that box on his own.  It would have been perfect if we’d just been a little closer.”  Ezor added on.  “Now they’re going to be more protective of him.  That just made our job that much harder.”

Narti nodded her head in agreement while Kova *meowed* back on the shore.  

“They’re still going to take him with them on the lower risk missions though.  Maybe we could do something with that?”  Zethrid suggested.

“That’s what the setup on the last planet is for.  We’re going to give them a reason not to take him with them on any missions.”  Axha explained.  “That way, we can take him from the ship while the rest of their team is outside of it on the low-risk mission without having to worry about deactivating the ship’s particle barrier.”

“Why does Lotor always tell you more than the rest of us?” Zethrid asked.

Axha shrugged her shoulders.  “I’ve been working with him longer than the rest of you.”

“True,”  Ezor responded.

“Maybe we should head back to the ship.  It’s almost lunchtime.” Zethrid suggested.

“Yeah, my fingers are starting to get wrinkly,” Ezor added.

The group headed back towards the shore.  Narti shielded Kova from Zethrid as she shook herself dry.

“Uggh.  I hate how humid it is on this planet.  It makes my fur go all poofy.”

“Aww, but I love your poofiness, babe,” Ezor commented.

“How am I supposed to be intimidating when I look like a walking ball of fluff?  The other planet was nicer.  All that warmth and not nearly as much humidity as here.”

“Yeah, but at least it rains here,” Ezor responded.

Kova *hissed* at being reminded of the rain.

“I think Kova agrees with me that the other planet was better.  What about you guys?”

“I like this planet better.  You can’t exactly go swimming with that tall grass everywhere on the other one.” Ezor said.

“I like this one too.  There’s more cover with the forest here.” Axha voiced her thoughts.

“What about you, Narti?” Zethrid asked.

Narti shrugged her shoulders.

“Oh come on, Narti.  You can’t leave it at a tie.  You have to pick a side!”

Natri shook her head with an amused look on her face.

“You can always ask Lotor, babe.”

“I could, but he’d probably say something about how it doesn’t matter which planet we like better since the most important one for the plan is the next one.”

“One way to find out.”  

“We can wait for him back on the ship.  It looks like another storm’s coming.” Axha observed as Narti picked up Kova and let him hide from the rain in her hood.

“Let’s see if we can beat it, for Kova’s sake,” Ezor said.

Kova *chirped* in appreciation.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The paladins were on their way back to the training deck after lunch.  The pastelitos had been delicious, but what else would you expect from Hunk?  Lance noticed that the others were walking slower than normal.

Maybe it’s because of a food coma.  I know I go slower when I’ve eaten a lot.

‘But they did ask if you needed them to walk slower so you could keep up with them on the floating tray.’

Yeah, and I told them no.  They’re just walking slowly cause they ate a lot, right?

Lance thought back on some other things that had happened during lunch.

Hunk had offered to lower the height the floating tray floated at if it was too high.  Lance appreciated the gesture but told him he’s fine with it where it is.  Hunk had said that if Lance ever changed his mind, he would help.  It seemed that after everyone got to see the world from Lance’s current perspective they had become more protective than they had become after he had almost suffocated in the jewelry box.

The rest of the team had gently encouraged Lance to stand further back from the edge of the table during Lunch.  This, even though to him it was like 5 ft. to the edge of the table.  He wasn’t about to fall off the edge.  He figured having to stand a little bit further from the edge really wasn’t that big of a deal, but they kept giving him worried glances and trying to act like they weren’t.  They were acting like helicopter parents.

He knows they care, and he’s glad they do, but there’s a point where it becomes overbearing.  He needs room to breathe and he just wants them to realize that he can handle himself while he’s like this.  But he doesn’t say anything.  Given enough time, things will go back to normal.  Everyone else will realize they’re worrying over nothing and pretty soon Allura will fix him and they can all just forget this ever happened.  It’s really not a bid deal, even if his thoughts keep circling back, planting seeds of doubt in his head.  He tries to ignore those thoughts as the group enters the training deck.

“Alright, Hunk.  This is your last chance to guess my real name.  Get it right, I give you 20 GAC.  Get it wrong, you give me 20 GAC.  What is my name?” Pidge asked, certain that Hunk wouldn’t be able to guess it.

“Ok, I thought about it all through lunch, and I think I’ve got it.  Katherine.”

“Is that your final answer?”

“Yes…no…uh…yes.  Final answer.”

“That is not my name.  Pay up, Hunk.”

“Aww.  What is your real name then?”

“I’m not telling you.”

“But you have to.”

“I never said I would tell you my real name if you lost.”

“Well, then how do I know you’re telling the truth?”

“Would I ever lie to you, Hunk?”

“Yes.  Yes, you would.”

“She’s telling the truth,” Lance said.

“Wait, you knew?  And you didn’t tell me?  Lance, you’re my best friend, how could you not tell me?!” Hunk dramatically responded.

“That would be cheating, Hunk,” Lance answered with a teasing smile on his face.

“We can go double or nothing if you want to try again, Hunk,” Pidge suggested with a smirk.

“Nope.  Trying to guess it was way more stressful than it should have been.”

“*hem-hem*” Allura cleared her throat.  “Perhaps we should be refocusing our efforts on training?”

Everyone agreed.

“Is there anything else the simulator can do?”  Lance asked.

“There’s a lot that it can do.” Pidge began explaining.  “One thing it can do is shift through someone’s memories and create scenarios based on previous situations they’ve been in.”

“Wait, it can look through our memories?” Shiro asked.

Pidge nodded.

“Would it be able to help me fill in the gaps in my memory?”

“It could help, but I don’t know if it could fill in every gap.”

“Maybe it could help you figure out the rest of the project name you’ve been trying to remember, Shiro.”  

“An excellent idea, Keith!” Coran exclaimed.

“That could give us the edge on Lotor,” Allura commented.

“Me and Coran can get that set up right now.” Pidge and Coran went over to the console.

Lance noticed a flicker of hesitation in Shiro’s eyes.

“Do you want to do this now?” Lance asked Shiro.

Shiro thought for a moment before responding determinedly, “I want to know what they did to me.”

“Is there anything the rest of us can do to help?” Lance asked.

“We could all go with Shiro through his memories as moral support.  If that’s ok with you, Shiro.”  Pidge responded.

“That might help, but I should be the one asking if you’d be ok with it.  There’s a lot of blank spots from both times I was a prisoner, and what I can remember is…not good.  They forced all of us prisoners to fight creatures we had no hope of beating.”

“Like Myzax.” Keith commented softly.

“Exactly like Myzax.  They would also force prisoners to fight each other in horrible situations where the only way out was death.  Yours or someone else’s.  It didn’t matter to them.  They wanted blood and a show.  They had us fight each other to discourage us from befriending the others and rebelling, I’m sure of it.  We never knew if we could trust anyone we were with.  All you could do is hope you wouldn’t be the one chosen to fight that day.  I can’t even remember how many I fought.”   Shiro’s voice cracked as he tried to keep his composure.

“We won’t let you face it on your own.”  Allura reached for Shiro’s hand.  “We’re a team.”  She squeezed his hand comfortingly.

“We win together,” Keith said.

“We lose together.” Pidge continued.

“We fall together,” Hunk added.

“We rise together.” Lance finished.

“I’ll get everything set up,” Coran stated.

“Are you guys sure you want to do this?  What you see might change how you see me.” Shiro was still giving them an out if they wanted to use it.

“Shiro, you’re our friend.  Also our Space-dad.” Lance received one of Shiro’s signature Space-dad glares at the comment.

“There’s nothing in your memory that would ever change what we think of you,” Allura assured him.

“Alright everyone, grab your helmets and we can get started,” Coran said.

Everyone got back in the positions they had been in earlier that day.

“If things get too intense for you Shiro, please let us know,” Coran stressed.  “I can bring you out of the mind meld splickety lit.”

“Thanks, Coran.” Shiro smiled slightly upon hearing Coran mix up the phrase.

Once more they found themselves in the mind-meld.  Lance was glad that he was the same height as the others again.  It was nice, even if it was only temporary.  All they could see was darkness.  

“Ok, so how does this work?”  Shiro asked out loud.

“Just think about something and the system should do the rest,” Coran answered from outside the mind-meld.

Suddenly there was a burst of bright colors and overlapping sounds.  No one could make out any of it.

“Try focusing on a specific memory.  You’re overloading the system!” Coran commented.

“Let’s start with something simple.  Maybe something that all of us were present for?”  Allura suggested.

The colors came more into focus and the sound became less muddled.  The team saw images of themselves from months ago.

{So what’s the plan?  We go in there and just *pow pow pow* and free the prisoners?}

{What was that noise?}

{Lazer guns.}

“I remember this!  This is from when we went to save Hunk’s girlfriend!” Pidge teased.

“She’s not my girlfriend.  At least, not yet, I mean, if she wants to be.  I don’t have the guts to ask.  What if she says no?”

“Come on, Hunk.  You’re a catch!  You just have to tell her how you feel.”

“You’re one to talk, Lance.”

“Hey, we’re talking about your love life, not mine.”

“Maybe we should get back to helping Shiro?” Keith interjected.

{Okay, enough with the bad sound effects.  Besides, it’s more like *blam blam blam*}

“Alright Shiro.  Try to focus on your time with the Galra.”  Allura said.

Shiro took a deep breath before everyone was surrounded by darkness once more.  Images began to fly by, faster than any of them could make out.  All they could tell was that there was a purple tint to them.  The sound of weapons clashing and people screaming filled their ears.  The images slowed down and started to go like a slide show, pausing for just enough time for everyone to see and hear.  An old man holding a sword standing next to Shiro.  The man dead on the floor, sword at his side.  The crowd chanting “Champion!”

Shiro tried to shake the memory away, not wanting to think about that moment.  He tried to focus on the memory of the project name, but his thoughts started spiraling out of control, getting louder and louder.

“Think of your happy place!” Lance yelled over the noise as everyone grabbed hands in a circle to try to ground Shiro.

They were suddenly in a new memory.

{I'm going to be a paladin again.}

{Oh, come on now. Do you really want to play a paladin? You could be something completely different: a maven, a mage, a cleric, a klazgool, a bard.}  

{Don't know what's more fulfilling than a paladin.}  

{You're already a paladin in real life!}

“Your happy place is playing Monsters and Mana?”  Pidge asked.

“More the part with being a paladin,” Shiro admitted sheepishly.

“Are you ok, Shiro?” Lance questioned between Keith and Hunk.

“Do you need me to bring you out of the mind-meld?” Coran asked.

“No, I’m good.  Just…forgot how intense some of my memories are.  I’ll be ok.  We need to figure out the name of the project.”

“Yes, but we do not wish to do that at your expense,”  Allura stressed beside Shiro.

“If you need time to catch your breath, we can wait,” Keith added from the other side of Shiro.

“We might be able to, but the universe can’t,”  Shiro stated.  “Every tic we wait is one more tic the Galra Empire has to destroy worlds.  The fate of the universe is in our hands.  I can get through this.  For the universe.”

“For the universe.” The others echoed.

Bright lights started flickering in the mind meld as Shiro tried to focus on the memory.  Then a memory of him being trapped with purple water starting to pour into the space.  Next, he was on a lab table with Haggar cackling in the background.  Then darkness.  It stayed that way for a while.

“Is something supposed to be happening now?” Hunk whispered to Pidge.

“Shhh!” Pidge and the rest of the group said in unison.

“This is a memory, just one that I wasn’t entirely aware during,” Shiro stated.

Everyone quieted down once more.  They heard a muddled *thump, thump, thump* getting closer.  Footsteps.  Heavy ones.  Probably guards.  The sound became less muddled as the guards seemed to stop in front of Shiro in his memory, though it still sounded like they were underwater.

{How long do you think this one’s going to last?}  *Glass tapping noise*

{Given what happened to the last one, I give it a movement, maybe less.}

Both of the guards laughed at the second one’s comment.

{And then we get to start over with the next one.}

Everyone tried to ignore the happy *sigh* the first guard let out.

{The witch’s project is ambitious, though the name is a bit obvious, I mean Project Kur-}

{Hey!  You’re not supposed to say the name in front of them!}

{They’re in stasis.  They can’t hear a word we’re saying.  Don’t let the witch get to you, newbie.}

{…It is a bit on the nose, though, right?  Project Kuron.}

{She could have thought of a better name for it, don’t cha think?}

Shiro suddenly let go of Allura and Keith’s hands and backed away from the circle.  His face was pale.

“You can bring us out now, Coran,” Allura said.

“Right-o.” It took Coran only a few moments to get everyone out of the mind-meld.

Just like before, they all had to blink to get their eyes used to the lights again.

Unlike before, Shiro was very much shaken.

“You know what that word means, don’t you, Shiro?” Allura spoke softly.

He nodded.

Everyone turned to him to hear what the mystery word meant and see why it had affected Shiro so much.

Shiro took a breath.

“Kuron means clone.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Realities without Lance: 122 (+2)

Previous          Next          Masterpost

[souleater1987]

Sticky Notes (FriendlyPack Fic)

Title: Sticky Notes

Pairing: Stan Wheeler x Jimmy Bending (FriendlyPack)

Summary: Stan and Jimmy had been boyfriends for a while now and Stan thought of a perfect 1st anniversary date for jimmy. He places sticky notes with clues of where he is. With their friends helping Stan with the idea. At the end of the scavenger hunt, Jimmy finds Stan wearing a blue tuxedo with his signature Fannypack standing on the place where they first met.

Disclaimer: It’s been months since i last write something. Hope it’s not too bad! ((Special thanks to @huffle-puff-ego and @missfeisty199 for the help))

Words: 2,668 words (Not including THIS and ABOVE)

“Sunflower?”

     He asked as he opened his eyes. The bed was empty and cold, missing a certain person. His eyes wondered around the room he was in, and then he stumbled upon a yellow sticky note on the pillow next to him. He picked it up and already recognized the handwriting that it belongs to his love. He smiled and whispered to himself the words;

  “Good Morning, Friendly.

  There’s breakfast ready for you in the kitchen!

  Drink plenty of water!

                                                           Love, Fannypack”

 He smiled and went towards their kitchen. He sat down and digs in the wonderful food his sunflower made for him, and of course drank plenty of water. After his stomach was full, he then noticed another yellow note sticking on the flower vase in front of him. It reads:

 “A water a day keeps the thirst away!

I know you’re confused right now from all 

 This notes but don’t freak out! I’m at the

 Hospital-“

  He didn’t even finish reading the note and quickly dressed up and went running out the apartment. He burst through the door scaring some people next to him. He apologized and ran to his car. Arms fiddling to unlock the car door while cursing out such colorful words. His heart beating fast and his mind thinking all the possible bad things that happened to his sunflower. Snapped out of it Jimmy! His fine.

  When the engine is on, he quickly drove towards the hospital. Ignoring the red lights and cars that are honking on his fast driving. He could probably be pulled by a police by speeding but that’s none of his concern at the moment. After what felt like an eternity, -when it was only 4 minutes thanks to his driving-, he finally arrived at the hospital. Bursting through the glass door, shocking some patients and nurses. Brenda, the receptionist, was on her place staring at what was happening. Trying her best to not full on laughing at Jimmy’s full on outburst. The man was yelling his sunflower’s name to people asking where he is and running from A to B. Brenda, with her amusement quenched, called the man over. Not even a second later, his already in front of her.

  “You bitch! Where’s Stan? You stole him from me did you!? Oh my fucking god! When I found him, I’ll kill you and-“

 “Jimmy, chill. Your boyfriend is fine. But he told me to give you this.”  She then gave him a yellow sticky note. And it read;

  “I’m sorry for scaring you! I didn’t mean to give

 You a heart attack! But remember all the times

 We were put here and waited for each other?

 Fun memories, I say!

 I’m at the police station! And no I am not in trouble!

                                                  Love, Fannypack”

He let out a sigh of relief. “Sorry about my sudden outburst, Brenda.” He said embarrassingly. She rolled her eyes and nodded. Pointing at the door and said, “Whatever, just go get your man or something”. Jimmy’s cheeks turn a slight shade of pink. His still not used to hearing someone pointed out that his in a full on relationship. His not thinking it in a bad way! Don’t get him wrong, his so proud that as amazing and handsome as Stan is his boyfriend. Hell, every time he and Stan went out holding hands, they’re not afraid to show it off.

  He shook his head, stopping the voices in his head to write a long ass essay of his life. He put on the ignition and head out to the police station. He turned on the radio to engulf the silence and continue driving. When he finally arrived at the front of the police station, he turned off the ignition and step out the car. The blue haired man walked in the door and saw Lieutenant Ziggy on the counter. The policeman waved him over.

 “Hey Jimmy, what brings you here-“

  “Ziggy, shut up. I know Stan said something for me so just zip it” He said and slammed his hands on the counter. The policeman sighed and gave him another yellow sticky note with the same handwriting. It said:

  “To be honest I have no idea why the next location is the police station.

 Maybe because it’s the only thing Ziggy would work for me.

 Anyway, I’m at the place where we did the you know what.

The cabbage picking. The parmesan. The not so legal.

Okay! The first house we robbed together!

                                                      Love, Fannypack”

   “You didn’t read this, did you?” Jimmy asked nervously. The incident was so long ago but it’s still a crime. The police man chuckled and said, “Even if I did read it or not, I’m not going to bust your ass. Just go and get your man before I change my mind”. He didn’t twice and went directly out the building. Went inside his car and drove the fuck out of there. The man let out a sigh and focuses on the roadway ahead. He noticed that the city is quite silent today, like nothing bad is happening. No cry for help, no ambulance sounds, and no police sirens heard. It’s weird to have a peaceful day in Los Santos. Not that he mind, just weird.

  He saw the house ahead and remembered the quite fun memories he and Stan had. Even though he almost traumatized Stan with him allegedly murdering the man who owns the house. It’s fun. He saw someone on the sidewalk and it seems its Eugene and Edna. He parked in front of them and waved.

   “Funny seeing you two here. Let me guess, Stan told you to wait here for me to arrive and give me a piece of note” Jimmy said to the two. “Hell no, we’re here because a man who looked like Stan is dead inside the house” Eugene said with glee. Jimmy’s face turned pale and nervously laughed. Edna quickly punched Eugene, “Ey! Don’t scare the poor boy with your shit!” She then looked at Jimmy who is still at the state of shock and slapped him, waking him up. “His just being his shitty self, Stan’s fine. Here” She gave jimmy the paper. “Just get out of here, I don’t want any witness when I kill this bitch” Eugene quickly ran away with Edna on his tail.

  “My first time doing something illegal! The adrenaline was

 Something! Remember when I yelled ‘Oh my god’ so many times

 When you killed a man? Good times. Oh, and you almost selling me crack?

 The friendliest crack dealer in Los Santos! I’m at the place where we almost died!

                                                               -love Fannypack”

   He shivered at the thought of the memory. The time when they turned into hostages. He turned on the ignition and drove to Polido Bank. He turned on the radio to silence the long drive to the bank. To his surprise, he heard Kiki’s voice in the radio.

  “Good Afternoon, you mothertruckers! Kiki Chanel in the house for your daily thirst quenching! Queue the applause..... I SAID QUEUE THE APPLAU- yayyyyyy. Okay, okay, okay. Before you get your daily bad choices of song, here’s a special message from Jackie chan himself! He said and i quote with his voice; Better hurry up before this motherfucker is dead!’ And here we have our special sponsors, Kiki’s KOC-“

  He suddenly turned down the radio and pressed hard on the paddle, increasing the acceleration of his car. Moving from left to right, avoiding everything that is on his way. Praying that he won’t get pulled over. After what felt like an eternity with his heart beating fast, he can finally see the bank ahead with Buddha or Jackie chan leaning on the side of the bank. With him are two people with a monkey mask and a bandana covering itself. He pulled over and walked hastily to them. 

  “Where’s Stan-“ he was cut off with a gun on his forehead. The man who has the gun tsked and shook his head. The other two who is with him chuckled, making Jimmy nervous.

  “Remember the time when you said they were boyfriends? And they denied?” The man with the monkey mask said to the bandana. He nodded and replied, “And now look at where we are now. The two supposedly not in a relationship are now lovebirds!” The bandana surprisingly shrieked in delight. Following the monkey and Jackie chan. Removing the gun off Jimmy’s forehead.

  “We’re just fucking with you, Velvet aurora!” Jimmy shivered at the name and corrected him with “Friendly”. Jackie Chan nodded and gave him the yellow note his been waiting for. Jimmy said his goodbyes and quickly walked towards his car. But not without hearing one of them say, “Go get that Water man D!”. Jimmy’s cheek reddened and drove off the bank. While driving, he swiftly read the note. 

  “The time when my life flashes before my eyes! In a bad way, i say! Still grumpy about them not buying my water. Anyway, remember when you threatened me? Yeah I’m there! 

                -Love, Fannypack”

   He checked his watch and saw it’s almost past 4 O’clock. He took off his sunglasses and started rubbing his forehead. “All of this stress better be worth it, Stan” He whispered to himself, but a small smile visible on his lips. He saw the familiar fence and the gate leading to the place where he ‘threatened’ Stan. 

   He gets out his car and walked down. He saw someone standing near the water, wearing a rather familiar outfit. A female police outfit and its pink hat. 

    “Sup, bitch” yep, that’s kiki alright.

 “Why are you here? And how the fuck do you know this place?” Jimmy asked the gorgeous woman. 

   “Well nice to see you too, asshole! Such toxic masculinity. At least someone thinks I’m gorgeous.” Kiki smirked at him. He rolled his eyes and put out his hand, gesturing for something them both already knew. 

   “You’re no fun. I’m planning on like putting it inside a bottle and throwing it in the water and you sacrificing your life to get it or something” She said and simply shrugged at Jimmy’s shocked face. 

   “Anyway, out of all the places you, Stan, and I went to. Why this place?” Kiki asked. Jimmy shrugged and looked the other way, avoiding her eyes. “How do i know?” 

   She scoffed at his response and replied, “Because you’re his boyfriend? I can’t even believe Stan choose you over this bomb ass pussy! Huuuuuuuuuuuuuu” Then started dancing seductively. Jimmy pretended to gag and vomit. 

    “HOOOWWWW DAAAAAARRREEEE YOUUUUUU- here, I’m done with this toxicity of masculinity! This bomb ass pussy is out!” After she thrown the piece of paper to Jimmy, she sashayed away with her hips going left and right with her middle finger in the air. “Don’t forget to use protection and lots of lube!” She yelled. Jimmy quickly grabbed the paper flowing in the air before it hit the wet ground. He fixed his posture and read it out loud; 

   “A place where we’re merely strangers

   Introducing Jimmy and Stan

  Never thought they’ll be lovers

The friendly crack dealer and the water man

     Where am i?

                     -love, Fannypack”

   Jimmy’s chest felt so warm. The feeling is like when they first met. How such a middle aged man that is so naive and innocent ended up with a guy like him. He felt the tears coming up but quickly hold it. It’s not time yet. He pocketed the paper, along with the others, and went to his car. Jimmy started heading to the place he never though a love story would start. 

   While his driving, he can see the sunset shining through him. Letting the final ray of sunshine warmth him. Remembering the time when he and Stan went out to eat burgers and watched the sunset together. It may not seem like a date but it is to him. Oh how he wished his brave enough to tell Stan his feelings that time. But that doesn’t matter right now, because they’re together and happy. He’ll get even happier when he finally sees his sunflower. 

  His nearing at the destination and can see what seems like a curtain blocking the parking lot? Is that legal?

  He slowly parked near the destination and get out the car. He looked around, trying to find his love but no luck. He sighed and leaned on the side his car. He took out his cigarette and lighter, and was about to light it when he heard a very familiar voice. 

   “Didn’t you promised you’ll stop smoking?” 

  Jimmy’s eyes widen and looked up. His cheeks reddened and mouth opened, letting the cigarette fall out his mouth. There in front of him shows Stan Wheeler, wearing a blue tuxedo with a matching blue fanny pack. Some black shorts and black fancy shoes. His blonde hair was gelled back making him look somewhat fancy. His hands behind him fidgeting a bit and his eyes looking around, avoiding Jimmy’s covered eyes. Perfect timing, the final sunrise set on Stan making him shine. Making him looked like a literal sunflower that is blue all over. 

  “Uh-uhmm.. h-hi ji-jimmy...” Stan let out a genuine smile. Then suddenly the carpet behind Stan fall revealing such a beautiful sight. It was a beautiful sight when it got caught off by Stan screaming “GOD HELP! THE CARPET HAS DEVOURED MY EXISTENCE!!! HELPPPP!!”. 

   Jimmy chuckled at his clumsiness and helped him get out the carpet monster. -As that Stan called it-. Stan’s head is finally out, so does the rest of his body, and didn’t realize that Jimmy’s face is so near his. It’s so close that them both can feel each other’s breath. Both men has their cheek blushing. Even after a year dating, these two still get flustered over each other. 

 Jimmy helped Stan up and looked back the beautiful sight. There was Christmas lights attached above lighting over a fancy table with food and of course water. An inflatable balloon on the background spelling “Happy 1st Anniversary Stimmy by Kiki and friends”. 

   “So that’s why all of them are both so cryptic and extra stupid” Jimmy said to Stan. He nodded and gestured to the fancy table. They sat down and started talking about times they’re together and being themselves to others. They can hear some locals walking passed them but Kiki threatening them out loud outshine it. With Ziggy and Brenda trying to stop her from killing someone, Eugene and Edna film the whole thing, and other of their friends laughing. It may looked like they’re invading both of their privacy but without those people, none of this would’ve happened. 

  “I’m so lucky to have them, and also you Jimmy” Stan said. 

  “Don’t be such a sap!” The water man giggled at his response. “Oh! I almost forgot!” Stan then went under the table and let out a present. 

  “Wait, I didn’t get you anything!” Jimmy started panicking but Stan beat him to it and told him its fine. Stan gave the gift to Jimmy, who’s still sulking over not giving him a gift. Jimmy slowly opened the wrapped gift and saw... a water bottle? 

  “Uhm, Stan?” 

  “Look at the brand!” Stan said with excitement. Jimmy raised his eyebrows and looked down. It said, “Friendly Water!”. 

  “You and I are now business partners for my water business!” Stan said with glee. “Aren’t I already am with me driving you all over town?” Stan shushed him and told him that it’s beside the point. Jimmy chuckled at his silliness and stared at him with so much love. His so lucky to have such a wonderful and handsome man like Stan. 

 “I’m so lucky to have you too Jimmy” Jimmy laughed and realized he said it out loud. With the stars and moon shining above them, and the chaos happening around them cause by their friends. Nothing would ever ruin such a beautiful night. 

  “Happy 1st anniversary, Sunflower”

  “Happy 1st anniversary, Sunshine”

[mactuna]

ᗷᗩᒪᒪOOᑎᔕ ~ YOOᑎᗷIᑎ

Summary: so yoonbin finally got a day off from practice and y’all decided to head on over to the amusement park... and he fell even more head over heels for you thanks to a little balloon💛

“Binnie! Let’s go on that roller coaster!!”

He just looked at you with a skeptical, ‘are you kidding me’ look on his face.

“I don’t know Y/N….”

And it was the hardest thing in that moment to not uWu! at how cute he was being. The notorious Ha Yoonbin, the cold-hearted prince of high school, and freshman year of college, was actually the cutest baby when it came to rollercoasters. Giggling, you made the most convincing pouty face possible. And he nearly died! You were Y/N, the girl who had immunity against all aegyo and boys, was making the cutest face possible in all existence. How could he say no? Rolling his eyes, but inwardly dying of joy…

“Fine…”

Smiling like an idiot, you yanked him towards the very short line of the sheer drop. Trying to pass it off as just another common coupley guesture, you knew better when he laced your fingers with his. And right then, you realized you had the loveliest angel for a boyfriend who was willing to be absolutely terrified out of his wits for you. Pecking his cheek, you grinned.

“It’ll be okay Binnie. And I really, really appreciate you coming with me.”

But almost right before it was your turn, you saw a little boy chasing a little yellow balloon with his mother running and yelling after him.

“Can someone please help me get my balloon?!!”

Without thinking, you hopped onto Yoonbin’s back and reached up to grab the balloon, almost missing it. Smiling, you handed it back to the little boy.

“Here you go, little man.”

“Thank you very much miss!”

“And you are very welcome!”

The mother immediately bowed and thanked you, before leading her son away, gently scolding him. You cracked a smile while watching the two of them. It made you remember all the great times you had spent with your own mom. Turning back to Yoonbin, you were surprised to see him already staring at you with a little grin on his face. That’s when it hit you.

“OH MY GOD! I am soooo sorry!! I totally forgot that you said that your back was hurting! I know you told me and-”

Cutting you off with a soft peck to your lips, he hugged you tightly and gently pushed you forward in line.

“The only way you can make it up to me is to stop being so frickin’ cute, but then I’d be straight-up depressed so don’t do that. Please.”

Blushing, the two of you made your way to the chair that would take you to the top of the sheer drop. Winking, the ride operator smiled.

“You two are the cutest and most wholesome couple I’ve seen all day! Best of luck lovebirds!”

As it started to rise, you just sat in comfortable silence. Until the two of you just cracked up.

“I can’t believe that just actually hap- YAH! THIS MOTHERTRUCKING-!”

And suddenly, you were on the ground again. But you were completely and totally out of it. Meanwhile, Yoonbin was bright as a daisy and was just dying of laughter at how totally disoriented you looked.

“Lmao Y/N, you were the one who wasn’t supposed to be scared of it XD!”

“I KNOW!”

[luckycheesefoodie321]

Sooo I watched Bumblebee...(long post and SPOILS)

And I really enjoyed it. The action bits were mmmm yeah they were action bits but just the warm fuzzy moments and Bumblebee has now been officially added to my list of soft boi robots with mega killer mode...

(I was looking for a gif for Baymax without his health chip thing buutttt I think this scene killed me more)

AND NOW:

Bumblebee was pretty great, 10/10 definitely the most enjoyable Transformers movie and i enjoyed the soundtrack (that violent rejection of Rick Astley was kinda mean but whatever). Hailee Steinfeld as Charlie was great, I always enjoy her performances and while her dad dying and family tension was kinda weak (I was just kinda wondering why and how they managed to insert themselves into the action), she really brought the best out of a meh backstory...idk if this is intended to reboot or connect to the original Michael Bay films (would not mind this rebooting and then we get to see Bumblebee and Charlie reunite at some point down the line) but if it’s connecting then I just wonder how Bumblebee could go from connecting with such a rough and tumble mild badass cool chick like Charlie to the stumbling, bumbling awkwardness that was Sam Witwicky???

BUT SPEAKING OF AWKWARDNESS: MAH BOI MEMO OUT HERE JUST TRYING TO MUSTER UP THE COURAGE TO INTRODUCE HIMSELF AND ASK A GIRL OUT AND ENDED UP CAUGHT UP IN SOME CRAZY ANTICS WITH AN ALIEN ROBOT AND SOME GOVERNMENT MILITARY FORCE AND TRYING TO PREVENT AN INTERPLANETARY/SPECIES WAR AND HIS ONLY CONSOLATION WAS ONE MOTHERTRUCKING KISS ON THE CHEEK???!!!

Boi. But he respected respected boundaries when she said they weren’t in any sort of official romantical relationship and that’s great.

John Cena was ok. Some random angry military dude that got saved by the person/thing he was angry at and let them escape outta gratitude. Calling out to Bee at the last second and saluting him was corny af but it led to this:

Gif credit to @mostgirls

And that was great.

Also Dylan O’Brien voiced Bumblebee??!?!? I assume they only brought him in for the voice but hotdang if it didn’t seem like Stiles (albeit a more timid and obedient Stiles) fumbling around in robot form XD I wish I could’ve heard more of him but this is just Bee’s fate...

I will preface my conclusion by saying that I did enjoy the original Michael Bay films well enough (they did decrease in quality as they went on)...New Divide is still one of my favourite songs to come out of that, and I enjoyed how it became the theme for the movies...their action sequences were still pretty fantastical and the design for the robots still looks amazing...

Bumblebee’s action sequences were fine...idk maybe I’m desensitised to action sequences now after an over saturation of them in this superhero/action packed film landscape...but they didn’t wow me. I like that they rounded off the edges of Bumblebee in his design, it definitely suited his character and the overall vibe of the film but I definitely prefer and am more used to a more imposing Optimus as depicted by the Bay films. The opening seemed like it could be pulled straight from the cartoon...

The winner for this was the relationship between Bee and Charlie...I’m assuming this is just a prequel to the Bay films and having Charlie be the primary influence on why Bumblebee readily wants to help protect the humans (and ultimately does make that friendship with Sam) made a lot of sense. The most powerful scene was probably the Sector 7 Iron Giant scene (where Bee goes full kill mode seeing Charlie get hurt) where (firstly they tied in Sector 7) Bumblebee, who, even after losing his memories, had no desire to hurt the humans and when he first encountered John Cena (I can’t remember his characters name) he tried to avoid conflict and then tried to talk...but post-memory loss, the only times he became aggressive was when they threatened his good friend and that sparked kill mode. They showed how Bee learned how to talk via radio, and I love they kept in continuity his pushy matchmaker persona XD

All in all, a nice backstory. Wholesome as frack. 8.5/10 bc imperfect but in the right direction. I want more. I enjoyed Travis Knight’s work! Bumblebee is best boi and just trying his best and it hurt my heart a little seeing him cower away when Charlie yelled at him and I will definitely be finding that shot of him and Charlie looking over the (the famous bridge whose name I forgot) bc it was a great shot!

Anyway I’m done now you may leave.

[sugar-salt-n-spice]

newsies as things i’ve said for heard pt. 7

so this is a long one kings, because honestly, most of these are from a party and a movie night thing i went to last week. my friends are funny okay

——

pulitzer - YIPPIE KAYAI MOTHERTRUCKER

~~~

newsies - *all talking over each other*

elmer - several people are typing

~~~

race - FUCK YOU SPOT THE BIG TIRE DOES EXIST

~~~

spot - im gonna kill you

albert - *shrugs*

spot - im gonna cut your hair

albert - NO

~~~

ike - i know kombucha is vinegary but is it usually this much?

buttons - *takes a sip* king im 90% sure this is just straight vinegar

~~~

henry - don’t you dare put ketchup on that

race - *makes direct eye contact and covers mac and cheese in ketchup*

henry - *unholy screaming*

~~~

race - god doesn’t love me

jojo - well not with that attitude

race - dude i’m gay

~~~

sarah - get down from the rafters!!

crutchie - oh my god how did he get up on the rafters

~~~

jack - this is a house party. stop cleaning my kitchen

~~~

jack - this tastes like ass

specs - yeah, it’s beer

elmer - how do you know what ass tastes like?

jack - *takes another drink* you know? i lied, ass tastes better than this

elmer - the fact that you’re ignoring my question is a little unsettling

~~~

race - how do you drink from a glass bottle?

albert - well first of all, you don’t shove your entire mouth around it like that. what the hell

~~~

*spot and crutchie walk into the party*

race, standing on the back of the couch - WELCOME TO HELL BOYS

spot - *turns around and walks back to his car*

crutchie - now look what you did

~~~

davey - you can have the last peanut

jack - no it’s okay you can have it

davey - i had one the other day it’s fine!

race - y’all are wild just eat the nut

~~~

smalls - tell medda i need a man

jack - medda, smalls wants a man

medda - i can set her up

~~~

jack - is there a twink for lesbians?

jojo - femme?

sarah, a femme - no

mike - well now we all know who the top is in that relationship

katherine, also a femme - how dare you call me a bottom

~~~

jack - why are you acting like this?

medda - i’m just having fun

medda - ... also i’m kinda zinged on caffeine right now

~~~

mush - i can’t tell if i’m looking at a condom ad or an ad for bulletproof glass?

blink - in the end, aren’t they one in the same?

crutchie - ...no?

~~~

race, visibly stressed - where’s my boy?

davey - les?

race - yes!

sarah - in bed

race - FUCK

~~~

les - *walks past*

tommy boy - OH MY GOD IS THAT A GREMLIN!

sarah - that’s my brother?

~~~

smalls - i feel witchcraft in this panara tonight

~~~

specs - you slept through all of finding nemo, why are you so invested now?

romeo - BECAUSE DORY IS MY MAIN BITCH

~~~

crutchie - why are you in the kitchen?

jack - because i live here too?

crutchie - that doesn’t explain why you’re in the kitchen at one in the morning

~~~

albert - what are you listening to?

finch - heavy metal bagpipes

~~~

jack - what do the bee movie guys call their dicks

race - bedicks?

albert - SHOW ME THAT BEDICK DADDY

davey - okay bonding time is over! time to go home everybody!

~~~

les - i’m very good at convincing. okay here i go. please?

medda - ...you’ve convinced me

sarah - what

les - heck yeah!

[burnedmytongue]

when my heart felt volcanic: good riddance

wassup party poeple im kaitlyn and this is my first fanfic so pls give me criticism but dont yell at me im a sensitive bitch thx!

in which calum stirs up her bad desires and she is burning him up

word count: 879 (the chapters get longer dont worry)

also all the chapters have songs that go along with them so that’s what the song titles are

okay here we go mothertruckers....

fuck.

isabella had thirty minutes until she needed to be in place for her graduation ceremony,  but she had just closed her fingers in the door of her dorm room. she swallowed back the scream in the back of her throat and inspected her hand. perfect. amazing. wonderful. she had broken a nail. sure, other than that, her hand was fine, but now her college graduation pictures would forever immortalize this moment in which she shut her fucking hand in the door.

she had no time to think about pictures, though. she was supposed to be meeting taylor and maddie in the lobby.

"izzy hurry the fuck up we're gonna be late," maddie yelled at her friend when she saw her sprinting out of the stairwell.

"then let's go," izzy yelled back, running outside towards taylor's white jeep. isabella sat in the back and thought about how bittersweet it all was. she was happy to be graduating, as if her fast tracking her way through her degree in order to graduate in two years didn't make that clear enough. however, she wished her older brother, ashton, could be there to see her.

ashton was in a band and they were slowly growing a very dedicated fanbase. he was currently at rehearsal for their last show on this tour. she leaned up and asked taylor to turn the volume up, hoping to distract herself from her thoughts. of fucking course good riddance by green day was on. it seemed fitting as they made their way toward the arena.

when they arrived at the pauley pavillion, they were ushered into their seats, and soon enough, there were only two people in front of isabella and her UCLA diploma. as she walked up the steps, the annoucer called her name. "isabella violet irwin, bachelor of arts in photography."

as she was handed the piece of paper, she heard cheering from the crowd and smiled to herself as the cameras flashed. she walked back to her seat and looked around at her graduating class, taking in the fact that it was all really over.

after the ceremony ended, izzy, maddie, and taylor said their hellos to their families. after talking with maddie's parents and having taylor's nephews almost pull izzy's dress down, the trio began their search for izzy's mom. they walked around for a few minutes before a pair of strong arms lifted isabella off the ground.

"hey what the fu-," she began before noticing a familiar set of blood moon tattoos.

"Ash! what the fuck are you doing her?" izzy screamed before turning around and bear hugging her brother.

"well, i figured it would be pretty rude to not show up to my own sister's college graduation. plus, i thought i owed it to you after all those loud drum sessions when we were kids"

"yeah no shit, asshole," izzy said, shoving him and laughing. "where's mum?"

"she's waiting in the car," ashton replied, shoving her back. "got too crowded for her. come on, i have a few more surprises."

isabella followed ashton to their mom's rented car. she had flown out for izzy's graduation and would be staying for the show tonight before flying back to sydney. they approached the black car and isabella was about to ask where her surprise was when the back doors open.

"Holy shit!" izzy screamed as she ran towards the three boys who were trying, unsuccessfully, to climb out of the backseat.

michael picked izzy up and spun her around when he finally got out of the car. "hi mikey," isabella said, hugging the boy. after he let her down, she turned to luke, who kissed her check before hugging her as well. "congrats iz," luke said to her before turning to look at calum, who still had not made it out of the car. he had gotten his foot stuck in between the door and the seat. he eventually yanked his foot out, but not without losing his shoe in the process.

izzy giggled as cal made his way over to her, hoping on one leg. he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her waist, causing her to jump. "hi cal," izzy said to the curly headed boy. "hi bella," he replied before looking at her and grinning. "'m so fucking proud of you. did you hear us screaming?"

izzy laughed, "i should've known that was your loud asses." she looked at the four boys in front of her, not really believing they were there.

"can we go now? i'm starving" luke said. everyone nodded and looked at isabella, waiting for her to agree that they could leave.

"yeah, let me go grab maddie and taylor and we'll follow you guys." isabella replied. she found her friends and they said their goodbyes to some of their former classmates as they walked to taylor's jeep. they drove over to her mom's car and she motioned for her mother through the window to start toward the restaurant. isabella was sat upfront with the aux cord and hit shuffle. and as good riddance played for the second time that day, she thought back to that morning before ashton and her three surprises showed up and wondered how life could ever get any better than this.

______________________________

hi okay so basically this chapter is just setting up the intro to the characters and the setting of the story but it does get a little more interesting i promise. let me know if you want me to upload the next chapter, or you can check it out on my wattpad @blurryphace okay peace

[call-me-kitty]

In the right company this is normal.

[mugchild]

In this essay, I will describe different cathedrals and explain how Peter Parker is a little baby boy who will be respected and protected by all the power women of the MCU. Also known as the TCU. Also can we talk about how Wanda Maximoff needs to be respected and supported by all of us instead of hating on her? Because she went through everything one person could imagine in its worst nightmare. She lost her parents at ten and got trapped for 2 days under a collapsed building, lost her brother at seventeen while he was protecting Clint Barton/Hawkeye a literal Avenger, who he saved but died in doing so, she lost her country, she lost her new family and friends while fighting the other half of her new family the Avengers, in Civil war, she lost her lover because this ugly purple grape man needed the stone in his head, and she didn’t lose him just because so said ugly purple grape man took the stone out of his head, no…Marvel thought nah, let her suffer more and the audience too, so they decided that Wanda had to kill the love of her life in order to destroy the stone that ugly mothertrucker grape man wants. And then when she is emotionally broken and physically, earlier mentioned grape man just rewinds time like yeah this is fine, this is okay to do, so she just has to watch how all of her energy and pain and suffering and tears was for nothing. Oh, did I mention that she also held ugly grape man away with one hand while with the other hand destroying the mind stone, which is actually an infinity stone, while ugly grape man had 5 of those??? Like hell yeah that’s incredible.

[adashofniallandasprinkleoflunacy]

y’all.,,.,..i’m shaken not stirred

so apparently, the Ass Crack Of Dawn™ is the best time for me to be on that godforsaken site, dodging prehistoric fossils left and right to try and find at least one (1) good Mans™

I met this dude!!! His name is James!! And he sent me a face pic within like the first couple of minutes we started talking (I feel like it was his first time around here, tbh) and I did some Research™ and it all checked out so we got to talking n sISSSSSSSSSS

The boy is 18 and a virgin, yet he’s cute asf and over 7 inches 🧐🧐🧐🧐 noah fence but girls can be stoopid moVING ON

He’s blonde and like his hair’s wispy and it made my stomach flop and he looks like the Basic Soft White Boy™ all cute n shit like whomst allowed him?? to be like that??? hitting my weak spot with no remorse??

So we get to talking and I make him hard using my Fic Skills™ and he’s sending me pics and wow?? Y’all know in fics when I say H has a pretty cock?? This boy hit that mark like it didn’t look too veiny or engorged like a ballon or anything it was pretty!!

And the thing is, he was so soft like when he sent the face pic he was like “I bet you’re too good for me” n I was like “lol bitch wHeRe?” n then I sent one bacc n he was like “oh my god...you’re stunning”

Uhm # 1.) Quit Playing Games With My Heart (Copyright © Backstreet Boys 2008) aND # 2.) u just made my heart nut wow??

So we kept going and he was like, “Do you want my head between your thighs or my cock inside that tight little cunt?” n I was like “shoot👀👀👀get on ur knees bitch” n this boi.,,.,this gift.,,.,.lowkey think he either reads or writes fanfic bc he was spot!! on!! mothertruckers!!

And like halfway through mentally going down on me, he goes, “I’m gonna have to get your snap or something after this 😉”

N I literally whipped like I took my hand out my panties and whipped bc I didn’t want to come on strong or anything and he just read my mind like praise the Lort™

So I was like “why don’t we exchange now in case the site crashes” and we did and we took our little party to snap and another confirmation that he is indeed Real™ is he had a bitmoji and his last name was on his snapsmjsjs

So I tell him I can’t snap rn bc it’s night and my parents would have my ass as a midnight snack and he was like “that’s fine babe” n I was like cool cool ok keep uhhhhh ya know

So he keeps going and literally I feel like this boy had a list of all— and I mean ALL— of my kinks and was just going down the list, checking them off

Daddy kink ✔️

Good girl kink ✔️

Praise kink ✔️

“Gonna cum over daddy’s thick cock like the good girl you are?” ✔️

“Beg for me to fuck you.” ✔️

“Oh, you like that, huh? Naughty little thing.” ✔️

“That’s a nice girl.” ✔️

Good use of emojis at appropriate times ✔️✔️✔️

THE WHOLE TIME I WAS LITERALLY PUTTING MY HAND UP TO THE SKY AND THANKING GOD THAT I FOUND THIS GUY LIKE WOW IM SO USED TO GIVING N NOW I GET TO RECIEVEEEEE oh and after he finished going down on me he said “Shall we fuck?” n idk I just thought that was cuteskdmdke

and so he kept checking up on me and was insistent i cum first and just wow get u a mans who cares

So when I Burst At The Seams™, I went to help him so I did my Smut Writer Thing™ n he did his Nut Thing™ and after we were all said and done he was all “That was so fucking good, baby, wow” n I was all *blush blush* and then he said “you literally just blew my legs off like they’re goneeee 😂😂😂”

N i was like “yeah?” N he was like “definitely. My entire body’s been off tho lately cause I’m ill but you just blew my legs haha” n me, containing the Caring Female Hormone™, asked him how he got sick and he was like “I was playing football outside the day before in the cold” n I was about to hit him with my mom instinct but then was like hmmm🧐🧐🧐I prolly SHOULDNT rn since he’s cleaning jizz off himself that I conjured into existence haha!!

So then he was like “getting up to go get breakfast is gonna be a challenge now but I’ll find a way 😂😂” and literally JUST as I was typing out “my g where u from?” he sent “Oh, and I’m from England, btw...”

So then I nutted yet AGAIN bc wOW HE’S BRTISH N HARRYKEKDJEJS

And whilst I was busting my nonexistent balls he then proceeded to write a cocky lil, “So I have an accent thing goin on...” to which i responded to with a “wOW” as I busted my third nut yet AGAIN² in the last 10 minutes

And yeah he told me to get to bed and that “we’ll find a way around the time zones 😏” and I was like “shoot!! Yes!! We!! Will!!” and yeah now I’m here crying bc the universe answered my extensive prayers can y’all beliEVE

[onelovewonderwoman]

No Getting Over You || Chapter ii/?

PART TWO MOTHERTRUCKERS lmao I made you guys wait so long, I'm so sorry. lets just get on with the fic

tags : @sukawaii317 @shoyzz-art @thyotakukimkim @running-outta-time @i-just-wanna-run-hell @munalisax @tomhollandsmouthfr0g

words : 986

Masterlist

No Getting Over You Masterlist

--------------------------------------

The fact that THE Spider-Man, hero and vigilante, to some of Queens, was standing outside your window didn't cease to boggle your mind.

Forgetting all your previous worries, you rushed to the window, now beginnings to worry for the physical health of the injured hero.

Opening the window, you saw the man fall while clutching his side, you caught his body before he could fall, slinging his arm over your shoulders.

Helping him into the room, you lead him back to your bed, helping him lay down.

“S-so,” you stood up after he’d let go of your shoulders, “What-what can I do t-to help, Mr. Spider-Man, sir?”

You heard him chuckle, presumably at the name, then groan in pain as he continued to clutch his side,

“Could you,” he let out another noise of pain, “Could you maybe just help patch me up?”

You nodded vigorously and ran out of the room to gather all the possible things you'd need. Needles, ice, band aids, everything.

Running back in, you sat on the side of the bed, and began to help the hero.

“Sorry,” you said as you attempted to stitch the huge gash on the side of his stomach, “I've never really done anything like this before.”

He winced slightly before replying, “It's fine, anything will do.”

You stayed in silence for a few more minutes as you focused on the task at hand, before finally asking the question that'd been nagging you,

“Why'd you come here?” Your eyes widened suddenly as you realized how rude you’d sounded, “I mean, not that I mind, it's just-just that you could go anywhere else, I was just wondering why h-here.”

You saw him hesitate, but soon thought nothing of it as he said, “You were closest. I saw your light on.”

It was late at night, 12:03 now, and a cold one too. Most people had gone to bed, including your parents, as you’d been working on last minute homework you'd forgotten to do due to your crowded thoughts as of late.

It only took another ten minutes for you to finish stitching him up.

“So, I guess I'm done, Mr. Spider-Man.” You stood from the bed.

You watched as he stood as well, pulling his suit from the waist all the way back over his built arms and chest before pressing the spider emblem on the chest, for the suit to be tight on his body once again.

Although you couldn't see it, you knew he was smiling as he said, “Thanks, for helping. I don't know why you were saying sorry, these stitches are great.”

You both chuckled at the comment before he looked out the window,

“I've got to go,” you saw him move towards you and pull up his mask to be just above his top lip. You stood frozen as you felt his lips fan against your cheek before moving a bit more towards your mouth, kissing just the corner of your mouth and less than half your lips,

“Thanks, again.”

Your eyes only stayed wide as he took two steps back to pull down his mask and look at you.

Only moments after he mumbled a small goodbye and leaped out the window; which you ran to, to watch him swing away.

Peter didn't know why he'd kissed you. Never had he shown interest in you in such ways; your best friend was his girlfriend! He didn't even think of dating you when he found out you had a thing for him. Alas, seeing you in vulnerable state, in awe of him, and all alone with no one to tell him no or anyone stopping him, he found himself craving the feel of your lips on his; he found himself wondering what it would be like to have done all the things Michelle told him you wished to do.

He knew it wasn't right; he felt guilt that night, and especially in the morning, as well as sick to his stomach, when he'd given Michelle the usual morning kiss in school.

He'd spent the whole day stuck in a pit of confusion and guilt.

Why had he kissed you?

Maybe he was wrong when he said he didn't feel interested in you, maybe he did; but he was with Michelle.

He also couldn't do that to you; it wasn't fair, and he knew that. You'd already endured enough heartbreak, not only because of him, because of Michelle. She had been your best friend, and now a guy drove a wedge between you both. Peter understood what it would be like to not have someone like you as much as you like them and lose them, Liz is a good example, but he wouldn't dare think about what it would be like to lose Ned. It's a nightmare.

Plus, Spider-Man can't have his own relations with others. He couldn't wear the mask for the rest of his life with someone else.

So, Peter promised himself he'd never go back. He wouldn't see you again. It would just hurt you more, and others if anyone were to find out.

But when he saw you walk into school, and throughout the day, it was almost as if you'd been happier. Despite the lack of he knew you'd gotten, and the helpless put you've been stuck in due to the lack of friends and social interaction, you were simply happy.

Peter really liked that.

He cursed himself for liking that the way he did. He liked it the way he did when Michelle would get happy to see him, or out on their small dates.

He liked it, the way a boyfriend likes the happiness of their girlfriend.

Soon, once he'd made his trip to Mr. Delmar’s and patrolled the city, he found himself making his way to your window.

He was as confused as ever; but he needed to know where his feelings stood.

[rruralroy]

Hey mothertruckers its rant time

So I have a slew of mental problems, yknow, the usual, and one relatively major physical health problem. For years (I'm talking since I was 14) I've had thyroid problems out the wazoo, and early this year, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's disease. Now, for those of you that don't know, here's a quick rundown on thyroid stuff:

Hyperthyroidism: metabolism goes too fast

Hypothyroidism: metabolism goes too slow

Hashimoto's: fuck you I do what I want, I also make your thyroid attack itself

Now, we found this out only early this year because I finally started seeing an endocrinologist rather than just my family doctor, and the person I got on my first appointment was a lovely woman named Dee. She's the one that told me I had Hashimoto's, and you could tell by the everything about her, she was ready to console a scared 21 year old about an autoimmune disease. However, thanks to my lovely mother and her genetic pool, I kind of saw something like this in my future, and wasn't scared, but uber duber confused. How could my thyroid go hyper- and hypo- and the same time? Is there a special medicine? I've been on the same meds for almost seven years what if that screws me up? I asked question upon question upon question and she answered them all, and was very honest too, sometimes giving me answers like "well honey hashimoto's isn't a very well-understood disease so I can't tell you anything exactly, sometimes it's a case-by-case basis, but these are some options you can do." That day I left the office knowing two things: one, I had Hashimoto's disease, and two, I was fine, it was whatever.

However now we get to the actual ranty part of this post, and if you want to skip past everything else, here's a TL;DR in image form:

On my next visit to the office five months later (the first visit was during winter break, the next the beginning of this summer), Dee was not there, but that was whatever. I liked her, but I'm sitting here thinking "well all these people are professionals and specialists about thyroids, I just have to tell them all the same stuff I told Dee, with my additional problems." My additional problems, you may be wondering? Sudden weight gain (normal amongst thyroid problems, but I had started eating healthy and exercising so I was very confuddled) and sudden super high blood pressure (I'm talking 150/100, not good shit my friends, which is not common in thyroid problems). But in a weird way, I was excited to see someone new this time, not that I don't love Dee, but it's just always good to hear more opinions.

Correction: its always good to hear more opinions from people who know what they fuck they're talking about.

So after the nurse comes in and does the basic questions and whatnot, here comes this younger doctor fella, and I think to myself, "ooh, a younger doctor fella, he might have some Sweet Fresh knowledge on Hashimoto's that Dee might not have had." This was not the case.

He looks at my bloodwork and notes how it's odd that I seem to have readings for both hyper- and hypo-. I tell him I have Hashi's. He dismisses it completely. He asks what I came in for. I tell him about my weight gain (despite the lifestyle change) and high BP. He looks at my list of meds, thinks for about ten seconds, and tells me "the weight gain is probably from birth control. Keep up the lifestyle changes and you should lose the weight. As far as your blood pressure, cut back on caffiene, especially pops, and salt." I try to explain to him that I've been on the same birth control for six months and am only now experiencing weight gain, I don't drink pop, I drink one cup of coffee a day, and I don't eat a lot of salt. He just???? Repeats the same advice, and tells me maybe I should change my birth control.

This was only a month and a half ago, and I was already pissed then because he assumed by my weight I wasn't healthy (I mean, I'm not, I have an autoimmune disease, but this isn't the kind of healthy or unhealthiness he was referring to). Now, in the present, today, I'm EVEN MORE PISSED because a friend of mine opened my bespectacled eyes.

I was talking about my recent bloodwork, and she brought up some stuff about her thyroid and some concerns she had. I was giving her my spiel that I give everyone about thyroids, and also brought up that second doctor visit because it was reminiscent of an experience she had with her family doctor, and how I was just so confused about how some doctors can be so dumb. And then she said it:

"It's because we are women and overweight so they dont take us seriously."

And I was like. Holy shit. It never once crossed my mind that I was a woman. When I walk into that office the only thing I think of is "hello, my thyroid is a piece of shit, please help." It never crossed my mind that I've been overweight my whole life. I didn't think my gender and my weight mattered so much when my thyroid is literally trying to destroy itself. But there it was. That was why I had the least helpful doctor visit ever. Because women are always complaining about their weight, right? And well, they never want to take responsibility for it, they always want something medical to blame, right? And I just. Holy fuck. I'm just really tired of male doctors dismissing female patients.

I guess that's the moral here kids. If you have a uterus (or, even if you don't have a uterus and present as female, I'm sure it's still just as bad if not worse in that case), get a doctor with a uterus. Unless you know a doctor with a penis like, really well, like they're a family friend or you know them or something, just get a doctor with a uterus.