#having ‘the audacity’ to make a post about it I’m blocking you I don’t care who you are or if we’re mutuals or not

[whimsyprinx]

regarding this post (linked back to my reblog of it) a lot of y’all are seriously so fucking pathetic. You’re out here calling a whole 16 year old a loser, lameass, pussy, buzzkill, narc, snitch, dickweed, and more! most of y’all are grown ass adults too like get a fucking life instead of getting together to shame a teenager for not wanting to drink and making a post about it online, from what I hear people have been harassing them, A CHILD as well. Y’all shouldn’t be pressuring or judging anyone over not wanting to drink ESPECIALLY children,,, like what the fuck is wrong with y’all?

[standfucker]

Finding Out You’re Stronger Than Them - Logia Edition (Smoker + Ace)

Feeling very stuck with my WIPS lately, so I decided to try my hand at a bullet-point style drabble. Ace’s and Smoker’s went fine, but Crocodile’s and Kuzan’s immediately grew into something too big for a bullet point list and will be posted separately, if I can get them to a point I’m happy with. Have these two for now.

CW: Just a little bit of violence

Ao3 Link

Smoker

You’ve been rising quickly through the ranks. Smoker’s heard that you’re strong, but by the time you get assigned to him, he has yet to see it for himself.

You’ve followed all of his orders thus far, and past reports on your behavior are generally positive, so when you block him from chasing a pirate one day, he’s taken by surprise.

“This one’s innocent. I saw it for myself. He’s trying to support the village.” You get into stance, eyes blazing with defiance, fully ready to take on your captain.

“It doesn’t make a difference,” Smoker says. “He’s still a pirate.”

“He only stole from nobles. People who wouldn’t miss the wealth. It makes every difference.”

“Get out of the way.”

“No.”

He turns into smoke to go around you, but you grab at where his ankle would be, your haki forcing his body back into shape, and swing him into the ground with such force that stars dot his vision as the wind is knocked out of him.

No one told him you could use armament haki.

“I’m stronger than you. Don’t get a big head because you’re my superior. I’ll surpass you soon.”

“I could have you court-martialed for this,” he gasps.

“Then do it. See if I care. That person was innocent–I know I did the right thing. I don’t give a shit about your opinion,” you pause, then add, “Captain.”

You crouch next to him as he struggles to sit up, still dizzy from the brutal impact. Picking up his cigars that have fallen, you dust them off before sticking one back in his mouth and putting the other in yours. You take an experimental puff, wrinkle your nose at the taste, and deftly twirl the cigar between your fingers. He finds himself staring as you exhale, smoke curling around your profile.

“I requested to be transferred to your unit because Tashigi told me you were different from the others,” you say, and pop the second cigar into his mouth as well. “So don’t disappoint me, Captain.”

The blush on his face is from indignation, or that’s what he tells himself. It’s the audacity. You have some nerve to talk to him that way. To lay your hands on a superior, to obstruct the law.

And yet. He shouldn’t, but a part of him–a big part of him–can’t help but admire your conviction. Enough so that he doesn’t report your insubordination.

It’s always refreshing to find a soldier who thinks for themselves, but it’s also dangerous if you cross the wrong superiors. (God forbid you talk back to someone like Akainu, which Smoker knows you would do without hesitation.) 

Smoker will have to keep an eye on you, to make sure you don’t get into trouble you can’t get out of…

Ace

One day, Ace realizes that in all the months since he’s officially joined the crew, he’s never seen you fight, not even to spar.

When he asks Marco about it, he says, “Oh, that’s because of the collateral damage, yoi.” Ace thinks Marco is joking and laughs. Marco does not.

But can you blame Ace? You’re one of the gentlest pirates in the fleet. You’re the kind of person who stops crewmates from squishing bugs, and who’s so stricken by the dead dogs at the end of your novels that you cry for days afterward (getting to hold you when you seek him out for comfort rules, but why you keep reading those, he does not know.)

After a battle with an enemy crew, one in which you don’t participate, Ace asks some crewmates why you abstained.

“Same reason Pops doesn’t join the small fights,” Haruta says. “Too messy, you know?”

“Wait, just how strong is Y/n?” Ace says, now realizing Marco was being serious earlier.

“Don’t worry about it, Ace,” you say behind him, making him jump. “Just know I’m stronger than you.”

That stings his pride, enough so that he challenges you to a friendly match while crewmates exchange glances.

“Sure, after you’ve rested from this fight. I’d hate to have a handicap.”

“I’m not tired! I can take you right here, right now.”

“Right now?” At Ace’s nod, you shrug. “Well, okay then. Here I go!”

You vanish.

He can’t sense you anywhere. By the time he figures out you’re behind him, it’s too late. One of your hands wraps around the back of his neck, the other on the hem of his pants. When he can’t escape by turning into flames, he knows you’re using haki.

You proceed to slam him face-first into the deck so hard he breaks straight through it, stuck upside down in the wood. The crewmates on the floor below blink up at him.

“You challenged Y/n, didn’t you,” one of them says.

Once his head stops swimming, Ace pulls himself out. His nose is broken and bleeding and he’s covered in scratches and splinters, but he’s looking at you with a newfound sense of awe.

“Logia types,” you shake your head, lip curling, “always so full of themselves.” Then you look stricken. “Oh, I hurt Moby again... Pops will scold me…”

And, look.

Ace knows what he likes. He’s not ashamed to say he found the whole thing extremely hot, but he has the decency to keep it to himself. (Literally the entire crew could tell, but no one tells Ace that either.)

He can’t stop thinking about the fight (if it could even be called that.) He stays awake at night, picturing the way your mouth moved when you said ‘Logia types,’ the little smirk afterward. He had always liked you, but now there’s a newfound aspect to his attraction, and he’s down bad.

Ace wants to know even more about you after that, asking you about your history and how you learned to fight. Luckily, you don’t mind the attention, and your humoring him feeds into his ego until he’s practically following you around in his free time. The rest of the crew takes notice, teasing him about being your shadow–but you never complain, so why should he care?

You've been spending lots of time together since then. He keeps fantasizing about saying “my partner can kick your ass” to people, but he hasn’t actually asked you out yet. It’s unlike him to be so gun-shy, yet every time he works up the nerve to ask, he only gets as far as “Hey, Y/n?” before your sparkly-eyed, saccharine “Yes, Ace?” crumbles his confidence to dust. But he’s Fire-Fist Ace, damn it! He faced Pops alone to save his crew, so why is this so difficult?

If he asks the other Division Commanders for help, expect a Looney Tunes style sequence of each one suggesting a courting method and it failing spectacularly and going up in literal flames, until he finally gets so frustrated with the whole thing he ends up just shouting his confession.

Bonus:

“There, there,” Ace says, patting your back while you cling to him and sob into his shoulder. “It’s just a stupid book.”

That was the wrong thing to say. With your emotions already running high, your misery shifts to rage in an instant.

“YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND THE BOND BETWEEN A KID AND THEIR DOG BECAUSE YOU ATE EVERY ANIMAL YOU ENCOUNTERED GROWING UP!!” you wail, then hiccup, sob, and bury your face into his chest.

Ace wisely decides not to point out the food scarcity of his home island. There are better times, and at least you’re holding him tight...

[a-court-of-lust-and-stardust]

Love on Ice Chapter 10: The Hickey

One of my favorite chapters 😉 I hope y’all enjoy some tension 🫦 Another chapter will be posted Friday ❤️

35 days until Competition

It was one of those days where no matter how hard they tried, Azriel and Elain were not in sync. His entrance into the straight line lift was too slow. Her exit on the stationary lift was unsteady. Their two foot turns were sloppy. Everything about their program was uncoordinated, and the frustration had gotten the best of Elain. 

“I’m done for today,” She decided after another failed attempt at a smooth exit out of the stationary lift. Mama would have scolded her for giving up, barking that she stay on the ice until the move was perfected. She would have listened, too. “I’m going home.” 

“How? I drove you,” Azriel reminded her, firm hands on his hips as he watched her skate away. His tone was a bit more clipped than usual. Not only was her cold demeanor unpleasant, but the new hockey schedule had been weighing on his mind for the last few days  and he wasn’t sure how to bring it up. It wasn’t everyday that he was out of sorts, but he had his moments. Today was just one of them. 

The sway of her hips as she angrily glided across the ice temporarily suspended his irritation. She’d filled out over the years, growing into a body that was strong and shapely, wearing curves in all his favorite places. And maybe it was wrong of him to stare, but her legs were clad in bright blue leggings that left little to the imagination. He swallowed thickly, allowing himself a brief moment to take in the swell of her backside, the way it’d fit nicely in his hands and—.

“Well hurry up and take me home, please. I can’t stand to be here for a second longer.”

Even the attitude dripping from her voice wasn’t enough to kill any sensual thoughts about her ass in his palms. If anything, it spurred them on. Blood rushed to his cock as thoughts of her soft skin flooded his brain. While he was fully content to stand there and appreciate her body, he was more determined to uncover what had ticked her off.

In a swift motion, he skated over just in time to block her path to the ice door. Annoyance rippled off her form. Would it make things worse if he told her just how cute it was when her nose scrunched up? Probably. He’d do it another day, then. “You want to fill me in on what’s going on?” He asked, folding his arms across his chest. The black compression shirt strained across his body. Hard as it was, Elain willed her eyes to stay above his chest so she didn’t fall into a spiral of picturing the well defined muscles underneath the fabric. 

“Nothing is going on,” She said, a bit too quickly to be taken seriously. She turned the question on him, quirking a manicured brow. “Do you want to tell me what's going on with you?” 

“I asked you first.” 

“That is childish,” she scolded, mimicking his stance. 

“What’s wrong, Elain?” 

“Nothing, Azriel.” 

“What’s wrong, Elain?” He repeated, voice tinged in vexation.

Her eyes shifted to his neck. The mark was still there, fainter and covered by his chain, but it was visible and all that mattered is that she saw red. She bit out, “You have a girlfriend. That’s what’s wrong.” 

The second it left her mouth, she wished she could have taken it back. It didn’t sound like a mere observation or an innocent question. No, it sounded like pure jealousy. And Azriel had the audacity to look amused. 

“Okay. That came out wrong,” Elain explained hastily, palms outward in defense. “I don’t care that you have a girlfriend. I care that you didn’t tell me.”

“I didn’t realize you were so hellbent on learning about my love life,” Azriel said, shoulder leaning against the protective glass boards. 

“It would’ve been nice to know,” Elain chided, hands on her hips. “I pride myself on being professional and respectful. I would never want to cause any issues between the two of you because we’re skating partners. So yes, you should have told me about her.”

Azriel licked his lips once, clicking his tongue in thought. “I have a girlfriend,” He reiterated slowly, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his light gray joggers. “This is the first I’m hearing of her. Tell me, what’s her name? What’s she like?”

Elain’s eyes narrowed, shifting her weight to one leg. “Are you fucking with me right now?” 

Azriel hummed. “If I was fucking anyone right now it would surely be my girlfriend, but I don’t have a girlfriend, Elain. I haven’t had one for years.” 

Her spine straightened. 

Shocking. And…kind of unbelievable, given who he was and what he looked like. 

“Okay, fine,” her hands slapped against the sides of her thighs. “You met someone in the club, took her home, slept with her, and then kicked her out in the morning.” 

“I can assure you I’m a gentleman,” he said, hazel eyes darkening. His mouth twitched comically. “I offer breakfast in the morning because I usually like to go all night long. Works up quite the appetite.” 

Her cheeks flamed. “Is this funny to you?” 

“Oh, I’m having a great time,” Azriel answered truthfully, a grin dancing on his lips. “I finally think I figured out why you’re asking me all these nonsensical questions,” he pushed off the glass and came forward, his large frame towering over her as their chests brushed. Big as he was, she didn’t balk from him. Never him. “Elain Archeron…you want to be my girlfriend, don’t you?” 

What?!

“I–what? No, I do not want to be your girlfriend,” She emphasized, though her voice shook with every word. Forcefully, she rammed her finger into his neck. “What I want is to figure out why there is a hickey on your neck.”

Azriel paused, blinking owlishly. 

And then he laughed. 

He laughed long and loud and hard, almost doubling over on the ice. Dumbfounded, she watched his body shake gleefully. She figured she must have screwed up somewhere, because something was humorous and she felt like she was on the outside of an inside joke. Her skin burned each time he looked at her, huffing out smaller laughs as he began to settle. 

He pressed a firm kiss to her forehead and squished her cheeks, stating through his giggles, “That’s not a hickey, Elain. Cassian was fooling around during practice and accidentally shot a puck at my neck." 

If she didn’t want to disappear before, now she truly wished the ground beneath her feet would swallow her. Azriel’s teeth caught on his lip, watching twenty different emotions flicker on her face. 

“A…hockey puck,” She confirmed, unable to hide the quiver of her lips. This was funny. Oh, this was really fucking funny. “You got hit…in the neck…with a hockey puck.” 

He nodded, eyes sparkling.

And then they both erupted into another fit of laughter. Azriel pulled her into his body, dusting a kiss over the top of her head as she squeezed her arms around his waist. “Gosh, I sounded like an idiot.” 

He rubbed her back soothingly. “No, you sounded jealous.” 

Elain pulled away, gently pushing his chest.  “I was not jealous, Azriel. Jealousy implies feelings.” 

“Right, you don't do feelings,” He contended, rolling his eyes. 

“Exactly,” Not wanting to ruminate on the feelings she certainly didn’t have, Elain asked, “So, what was wrong with you today?” 

And it must have been bad, because she’d never seen him look so dejected. Almost as if he were contemplating whether or not to be truthful. Her heart dropped when he clasped her hands. “The championship hockey game is the same day as the competition.” 

Eleven of the worst words he could have uttered.

At the worst time, too, because her heart had finally started to feel lighter. 

One sentence, and Mama’s dream was wiped away for good. 

"It’s immediately after the competition," Azriel went on. "I can absolutely attend both. But Rhys…" A long, drawn out sigh. "He doesn’t want me doing the competition with you, in case I end up injured in a freak accident of some sort." 

“And I agree with Rhys. You need to go,” Elain choked out, voice wet as she peered up at his solemn face. It broke her heart. “You should only attend the game, Azriel. I can…figure something out." 

Dark brows furrowed. “Absolutely not. We’re doing the competition. Together.” 

She huffed, rolling her eyes now to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. “I can’t let you do this. If you were to get hurt during the competition and had to miss the championship game, I would never forgive myself." She skated back a step, ready to glide off the ice and curl up under a warm blanket. Anything was better than this. Standing here in pain, in such a terrible, unfortunate predicament. 

“Hey,” he twirled her back into his chest, gently gripping her hips to keep her in place. “You are not letting me do anything. I am a grown man who can make his own choices, and I am choosing to honor the commitment I made to you. Don’t try to talk me out of being there for you. The game is not my priority. You are." 

Heat pooled in her belly at the conviction in his voice. 

He was adamant. 

Strong and sure and unwavering in his choice. 

Prioritizing her. 

She’d never had that before. 

And if he could do that for her, choose her, then she could do something for him too. Her lips curled, one finger gently tracing over the black ink on the side of his throat. His pulse fluttered under her touch. “Well, it looks like I’ll be attending my first ever hockey game that day, too." 

Azriel’s smile lit up the rink. He took her hand from his neck, holding it by his side as they skated off the ice. He said to her softly, “I’d like that.” 

They shucked off their skates and packed up their bags, linking arms as they headed for the parking lot. Before they reached his car, Azriel smirked, “By the way, I think it’s only fair I ask you the same thing you asked me.” 

She paused, cocking her head in consideration. 

He bent down to her ear, breath hot on her skin as he whispered, “Elain, are you fucking anyone?” 

It was sinful coming from his mouth. And the look on his face was entirely feline. 

She pulled away to stare at him, cheeks flushed rose. “No,” she breathed. “I’m not.” 

But two more words echoed in her head, ones she didn’t dare utter out loud. 

Not yet. 

ARTWORK FOR THE CHAPTER BY @chachachai17: Here

DIVIDER BY: @saradika-graphics

[dippers-guide-to-the-strange]

The thing was, I was not trying to be mean to you. I was not saying ageism is the SAME as racism. It's just as bad though! The reason I was saying this was that also. The post by drifting stars Mabel was partially untrue. He doesn't ship 'mabill' and they never did! If there's screenshots, that's fake. also, he apologized to drift. Plus, they literally transitioned. THIS KID WATCHES SOUTH PARK AND HAZBIN HOTEL. And don't even get me started on this persons art! He also almost committed suicide Because GOD DAMN, you actually kind of started it by reblogging the post that was made like 2 or more months ago. And people started reblogging. This kid is going to lose their account (maybe life too) one day thanks to everyone who reblogged that post. Maybe give them another chance. In the last ask I was not trying to sound rude, so my apologies. I'm not trying to sound rude here even.

//Okay for one it was sent to me, two don’t you fucking blame me for someone’s suicidal tendencies, you have no idea what kinda shit I’ve been through myself, you wanna SEE my left leg buddy?? Also, again, I don’t CARE how mature they are, you are ENTIRELY missing the point. You are making a big deal out of me simply seeing something, reblogging it just in case, and blocking someone. You are acting like I am openly harassing them and telling all of tumblr to go bully them. Grow a spine. Don’t care if you’re being mean or not, this is entirely unnecessary to send me an ask about, and incredibly accusatory. I don’t care what’s true or not, I don’t care about the full story, it’s not my goddamn business and I do not want it to be. If you continue to press this nonexistent issue, I’m blocking you. And no, ageism, which as my girlfriend said is absolutely NOT what you think it is, is not even REMOTELY as bad as racism in the fucking slightest and the fact you have the audacity to compare the two royally pisses me off.

[funkii-fox]

Should I block the French Guy?

This mf has the audacity to pretend to agree that AI “art” is wrong, then STILL is using AI to generate images of his ocs. I posted the quote of Araki condemning AI “art” and this fucking guy has the audacity to like it, even tho I had him in mind while posting it.

I was like “yk, I havent seen this guy’s story in a while because it’s 100% hateful, maybe I should check to see if he still does.” The most recent one I could find was from September 8th in a highlight abt ocs, but that’s not to say he hasn’t used it since and just didn’t save it to highlight. Make of that what you will, but I choose to believe he’s still using AI. I remember once I even had a convo telling him to stop using AI, but bro just went “ok” and still used AI BRUH🗿

But guess what else I saw: he likes Jimmy 😭😭😭 this was 100% expected tho. He once changed his pfp to Curly and i was like “your ass is NOT Curly ur Jimmy bro.” He posted 3 whole stories abt the community judging ppl that like Jimmy. He compared it to how ppl like DIO and said its bc he has pretty privilege and not Jimmy and thats why ppl judge them. I won’t lie; yes, most ppl like DIO bc hes pretty and charming, but at least he has some types of redeeming qualities. Jimmy is just 100% asshole. Every scene you see of him is he’s being a jerk or a fuck up that says “i can fix this” but actually can’t. Mouthwashing is SO un-nuanced in the way you’re supposed to hate Jimmy, it’s amazing rlly. We’re not even shown much of his personal life or other aspects of his personality; unlike other antagonists like Kira or Diavolo.

Now, am I gonna throw rocks at your window for liking Jimmy? No. Do what you want. But, i will psychoanalyze you and conclude that you like him either for the abusive dynamic or you like him bc he’s like you. This guy 110% likes Jimmy bc he’s relatable.

Simply looking at it face value right now, the way this guy is so OBSESSED with other people is insane. 90% of my conversations w this guy has been bruja arianna, snerufu, antis, women who make self insert ocs, or his arch nemesis Fay that he just can’t stop stalking. It reminds me of how Jimmy was obsessed and jealous of Curly’s success. He is also negative all the time. Even when making a joke, the punchline is always someone else or a cheap horny joke that comes across as a 7th grader. It reminds me of how Jimmy HAD to take Curly saying “i want more in life” the wrong way. It even manifests in the way bro had Curly as his pfp; because he wants to be like Curly.

We met from me shitting on bruja arianna. My criticism came from logic and a want to make change in the community, but it’s clear now that his criticism comes from hate and insecurity. He’s so passionate about hate, i think it’s the only thing he’s passionate about. He’s not even passionate enough about his own ocs to draw them himself. He’s so hateful he makes fun of women in the fandom for damn near anything they do, as if millions of ppl don’t also see him as a woman and as if he never lived as a woman. Then he hides all of his edginess as “im French lol we’re just angry :p” be so serious

His only other characteristic is being hypocritical. This guy “doesn’t deserve hate” but is constantly negative all the time. This guys gets upset at shit on a screen just to search it up more. This guy HATES bruja arianna for mocking trans men, yet all his male ocs are “androgynous” no mf they look like girls.

Chat, I don’t care anymore about being stalked. I’m stronger now. I have better things to worry about now that I have a life. I don’t care if he talks a lot of shit nor do I care if he “exposes” me for some made up bs. He can have a tantrum all he wants; i have better things to care about

Poll whether I should block him under the cut.

[firecrackerhh]

Yknow what? Fuck it, I’m in a petty fucking mood tonight and a certain Squidiot has decided to commit the sin of being, as usual, a terrible person to people undeserving of it, and I don’t tolerate bullshit. No one asked me to do this obviously but if you think I need permission to be a fucking bitch to people I deem worthy of such rage, that’s never stopped me before.

This bitch has the FUCKING AUDACITY to tell someone to get therapy for their “unhealthy coping mechanisms???”

Squidiot? The same clearly delusional dumbfuck who made a fucking google doc on every fucking “problematic” thing Viv has ever done? The same dumbfuck whose been such a pain in the ass to everyone on Twitter that both Viv and Morgana Ignis blocked them? The same bitch who makes long rambling near incoherent posts bitching about Viv and Helluva as if anyone beyond their braindead followers gives a fuck? The same bitch who keeps claiming they’ll leave and yet—surprise surprise—they never fucking do?

Ok I’ll be fair here, the last thing isn’t a sign of mental illness. It’s just annoying.

“Get better coping mechanisms.”

And you think you have the right to tell other people how to deal with their fucking trauma???? What the fuck is wrong with you???? Deal with your own shit before you go judging other people’s!

If your blog is any indication you have a lot of shit to unpack yourself.

Also, considering your absolutely deranged and frankly stalker like behavior towards Viv if not various crew members, I think if anyone should “get help” it’s you.

Assuming you aren’t already getting help (which doesn’t look to be doing much by the way if you are)

Like you said, you’re a trauma victim yourself. So how on earth can you be so fucking rude and basically shit on a fellow victim of abuse that was just as if not worse than your own, all because their way of dealing with their trauma isn’t to your liking? That you personally believe it causes harm?

How would you feel if someone said the same thing about your coping mechanisms?

Especially ironic considering it seems you deal with your trauma by being a major fucking cunt to people who don’t fucking deserve it.

How do you feel right now?

“Get better coping mechanisms.”

Don’t get me wrong, I can understand completely why you would want to avoid such content. I’m not a proshipper myself (in the sense that I personally don’t have those kinds of ships…unless you count oc/canon as problematic for whatever reason.) but I’m sorry, you can’t expect the internet to be a 100% super safe space where nothing ever makes you uncomfortable. That’s not realistic. It is your responsibility to avoid whatever triggers you. Block, mute, whatever you gotta do to keep your clearly struggling mental health intact. No one is here to baby you. You have to put in the effort.

To expect other people to do it for you automatically is immature and selfish.

I don’t mean that clearly struggling mental health comment as an insult btw. It’s frankly obvious to me you need some kind of help. It’s so obvious that you’re fucking miserable.

I would pity you if only you weren’t such a bitch. So intent on making everyone else as miserable as you.

That’s fucking sad dude. Dragging other people into the mud doesn’t make you any cleaner.

You say you’re leaving and all, but I know how hyperfixations work my dude, I should know, I’ve been obsessed with Hazbin (and to a lesser extent Helluva) for what’s going to be 4 years. I get the fucking rush of talking major shit on your blog is fun and all but Christ, you just sound so fucking angry. All the time. Isn’t that exhausting? I think it’s exhausting.

I know my header is tis I the werebitch but damn dude, I can only get angry so much about one thing before I stop caring at some point.

And then you say even dumber shit and suddenly I have an intense urge to tell you to go fuck yourself.

Contrary to the vibe I probably give off to the few followers that actually take the time to read this bullshit, I’m not exactly the most confrontational person irl. I’m actually quite shy in social situations and every time I fuck up even slightly in public I want to die, but I know what’s right and wrong, and this shit? Shitting on another victim of abuse because you think THEY’RE coping wrong?

That’s fucked up. That’s wrong. That’s fucking disrespectful.

Your own trauma is not an excuse to be a fucking asshole to other people.

And I have a low tolerance for bullshit. For those who claim to be righteous and yet their actions prove otherwise.

How do you fucking sleep at night? You’re so fucking convinced you’re some fucking martyr or something, that you’re helping people.

Has fucking anyone been helped by you? Or is this more for your fucking ego?

I don’t know nor do I want to know why you are who you are, there’s no excuse for this shit.

This shit is outright cruel. You’re cruel. Victimizing others will not make you feel better about yourself. Not in the long term. What you’re being is a BULLY.

I don’t respect bullies.

You treat people like shit for reasons I will never know. I understand you supposedly want to help people not suffer the way you did. But what you’re doing? Ain’t it chief. You do not help victims by bullying them into the “correct” way to handle their trauma. You’re just giving these people more trauma.

I’ll ask again. How would you feel if someone told you they didn’t like your coping mechanisms? I don’t care if it’s morally correct in your view to try and bully abuse victims into submission, or at the least dismiss their opinion because it doesn’t fit your narrative.

Rather hypocritical of you given you claim the fandom does the same thing…

I don’t like how you feel the need to ��cancel” people over shit from a fucking decade ago when said person has obviously changed. I think your attitude is fucking whiny, immature and overall unpleasant. You make those long ass posts under the delusion anyone fucking cares enough about you to read through that bullshit. At least I have the decency to put my rant posts under a very specific tag that people can filter out if they so choose.

And the worst part is this whole thing will probably fly right past you.

Yeah, instead you play victim, as you always do, focusing on whatever well earned insults I’ve thrown at you instead of the actual point. Like a child. Assuming you find this of course.

And hmm…funny, what was that you said about me?

Iron. E.

Projection if nothing else.

I said what I meant and I meant what I said. If anything from the few posts I’ve made about you bothers you, maybe learn how to self-reflect on your actions instead of blaming everyone else. Like a child.

I reiterate.

Get. Better. Coping. Mechanisms.

Fix. Your. Shit.

🧨🔥~Firecracker out~🧨🔥

[corpseaten]

Exactly my point, for this reason at some point I started blocking some popular yan blogs because it was getting on my nerves the audacity of those. I’m not the friendliest person and when I see people over friendly with each I get easily triggered. I understand to some extent that most of them are just lonely and feel connected by talking about their beloveds/darlings to each other but personally I can’t sympathize with this kind of behavior.

I’m sorry you’re still fatigued but at least now you’re feeling better compared to before, if you need to vent or anything I’m here for you. You said that you’re almost nineteen, is your b-dat soon to come? Also I need to see that bag please, I’m curious to know how it looks like.

If I have to be totally honest I refreshed so many times your blog just to see if you sent a reply to my ask, I don’t really have “friends”. Most of them are just people I know but I don’t consider them close enough to me, I just call them with that term because it’s the closest thing I can think of. Sometimes I don’t get myself but I can pretty much understand emotions, when it comes to me I just feel like a vessel and nothing more. It’s not like I’m emotionless but I prefer to show my well crafted facade if it makes sense to you

-🥩

I do not have them blocked , I just do not follow them! It is quite annoying that some more popular accounts just blatantly aren’t yanderes. like why be on yanblr literally just go somewhere else? I’m not friendly either but that’s what a yandere is, if you care for someone other than your beloved then, you aren’t a yandere. . . If they are lonely, should they not just go and talk to their darling? Or do things on their own? I would never decide to go and make friends out of my loneliness.

It’s okay . . it is probably just the stress getting to me, hopefully soon I will be better, I appreciate you being here anon! Indeed, my birthday is in less than two months now, a little scary, my final teenage year. I’ll post it in a separate post after this, so, it’s easier to find for anyone who is curious !

Ah, You have? May I ask why you’ve been so eager to see my replies? I do not have anyone close like that, I think any non-romantic connections are worthless! I am awful, I know. I do get what you’re saying, I feel the same sometimes, but I don’t think I do a good job at holding the facade up, at all.

[melodramas]

i’ve been holding this in for a very long time but i finally feel that i can share my experiences with tori, @lizzo. though this is just one interaction that i had with her that sent me over the edge, tori (a 24 year old white woman) has a history of harassing both people of color and minors (or people who are both, like me). when confronted about her disgusting actions, she acts like a typical white woman: being angry and defensive at first and then making herself out to be the victim time and time again. 

solely for context purposes, this post also brings up alana, @seegoldendaylight, a 34 year old woman who runs a sideblog for the film call be my your name, a film with blatant and graphic pedophilia. when i confronted her about this (completely civilly), she also made herself the victim and claimed that she was being bullied by someone who was half her age at the time. i don’t have the screenshots for the conversation as of right now, but when i did discuss this with her, i remained civil throughout; until she began accusing me of baseless bullying. 

the incident covered in the screenshots below happened on november 2, 2020 (a day before the elections in the usa). 

it’s important to note that this is not an isolated incident. i know for a fact that tori has harassed other minors and people of color in the time between november 2 and today, but it is not my place to share what she has done to them unless and until they feel safe doing so.

the post continues under the cut because it got quite long. please share this and block tori to reduce this racist woman’s platform on this website. 

at the time this occurred, i was 16 and tori was 23. trigger warnings for racism, lgbtqphobia, and pedophilia mentions.

for context, tori was discussing how important she felt it was to cut off conservative friends and family completely because they “didn’t care about lgbtq+ people and Black people.” she brought up her own experiences and how she, personally, was able to cut off conservative people in her own life and asserted that anyone who wasn’t able to do so was a terrible person. 

as seen in the last screenshot, her main point was that even if it was unsafe for someone to disagree with conservatives, they needed to do so.

tori then elaborated and went on a rant about her own situation and how she, personally, was able to successfully get out of a homophobic area and cut off these conservative people, saying (presumably to the other people in the conversation) that she was “tired and angry and somebody should be.” 

at this point, i entered the conversation and (as a moderator) tried to defuse it by speaking civilly with tori and trying my best to explain how tori’s perspective was often unfeasable, especially for people of color and minors. rose (notably a non-usamerican white adult) also agreed with me for the most part.

when i brought up the opression faced by lgbtq+ people in other countries, tori mocked me (and rose) for bringing up these other nations. as soon as we pointed out her aggression, tori made herself the victim by claiming that we were undermining her.

here, the conversation shifted. realizing that there was no way she could spin this in her own favor, tori switched gears, bringing up a conversation between me and her friend alana, @seegoldendaylight. as mentioned above, alana is a pedophilia apologist who is an avid fan of the film call me by your name and believes that all criticism of the film is a personal attack on her. 

tori mentions the old discussion once again, claiming that i undermined her experiences by accurately stating that it’s impossible for some people to cut off conservatives. she also asserts that cmbyn is a film without any pedophilia, all while knowing that it features a graphic, sexually explicit mlm relationship between a 17 year old boy and a 24 year old man. 

she doesn’t let go of the idea that “things are different in italy” to justify her baseless argument. she claims that i, a minor of color, harassed her friend when i civilly approached alana about the issues with the film.

she gaslights me, saying that i’m trying to manipulate her by telling her that pedophilia is bad. she makes another baseless claim when she says that i am only ever sporadically active “whenever i have a point to make.”

she brings up the baseless bullying claims at the same time that she is actively harassing me for expressing my discomfort and disgust towards pedophilia as an lgbtq+ minor of color and ceaselessly asserts that she is in the right.

as soon as other members enter the conversation, tori makes herself the victim again, calling me the bully. she shifts all blame off herself by refusing to acknowledge her aggression by saying that she was “apparently” rude when multiple members in the server were uncomfortable with her behavior.

she brings up alana once more, talking about her friend’s panic attacks that she gets because she is scared of being called out for supporting pedophilia in media. when i bring up my own panic attacks that i have experienced over the course of my time on tumblr that have been caused by the fetishization of lgbtq+ minors of color by white adults, she dismisses me entirely. she has the audacity to claim that all i care about is winning this argument when she mentions my supposed “moral high ground” when the actual issue at hand is her blatant racism and aggression towards a minor of color.

the discussion closes with this. tori summarizes what she believes has happened, completely leaving out how aggressive and blatantly racist she has been throughout the conversation.

apparently, she hates conservatives because they constantly undermine lgbtq+ people and people of color but is unable to have a single civil conversation about her own racist behavior.

please do not engage with tori and just block her. once again, her url is @lizzo. she has a long history of harassing minors and people of color while refusing to learn and grow after her disgusting behavior. she consistently acts like the victim when she is rightfully called out and expects people of color to be civil to her when they explain, time and time again, how she has been openly racist to them in the past. 

thank you for reading!

[duskandstarlight]

Embers & Light: Chapter 43.5

Notes: So when I posted last week I realised a few hours later that I hadn’t posted the whole chapter! So, here you go. An early, albeit short, update. Thanks as usual to my beta @noirshadow, who is incredibly patient with all my E&L ramblings and makes sure my writing actually makes sense!

Chapter 43.5

Nesta

Cold air snapped at Nesta’s body as Sala flew her to Lorrian and Frawley’s. Cassian travelled behind her, trailing her path, the beat of his wings grating on her until she wanted to scream. 

Of course, he hadn’t let her fly alone. He’d had to make sure that she was safe. That bond again, dictating his desires. Nesta didn’t understand why he couldn’t see that.

By the time she landed, Nesta had whipped herself into a fury that was frantic in its making—quivering with an energy that made her want to roar and sob until she was consumed with it.

“You’ve done your job,” she spat at Cassian, as he landed softly on his feet beside her with a neat retraction of his wings. “Now leave me alone.

They had landed just before the pine trees of the Eastern Steppes, where the forest decided to part for its witch and her home. The pine needles blocked out the sparkling stars above, casting the forest into smudgy shadows that made it near impossible for Nesta to pick her way across the ground, despite her fae eyesight. 

When she stumbled, Cassian flared his magic to light the way but, thankfully, he did not dare reach for her. Loose roots and fallen branches created obstacles underfoot, but Nesta let her body tackle them blindly until she cleared the tree line and suddenly she could see again.

Nesta picked up her pace, storming along the paddock fence as the cottage came into view. The building’s shape was blanketed by a coal-night hue, save for the buttery light that fogged around Lorrian and Frawley’s bedroom window. Besides the smoke puffing from the chimney, the night was alarmingly still, as if had taken in a gasping breath in anticipation of what was to unfold beneath it. 

The absence of Illyria’s fierce wind in Nesta’s anger felt foreign and infuriating, so Nesta walked faster, creating her own breeze. But the soft caress against her cheeks rather than the hurricane she longed for only served to sharpen the blade of her anger until it was lethal.

“Running away again,” Cassian growled from close behind her, his resolve to stay silent clearly breaking as Nesta stormed past the paddock entrance. He caught her wrist with a leather-clad hand and Nesta’s body jerked backwards as she was pulled towards him. 

“Why are you fighting this?” he asked as she snarled at him with such savagery it sounded like a wild animal. His voice cracked like ice over a river. “Why are you fighting something that I know makes you happy. I can make you happy, Nesta.”

“Stop it,” Nesta cut back, the slash in her voice a warning just as much as her words. Because Cassian sounded so agonisingly sad it bruised her lungs, every breath coiled with pain. 

“I’m not letting go,” Cassian told her, and they both knew the meaning was figurative as well as literal as he searched her face for something that would tell him to stay. “You can shout and scream and bite all you want, but you are not running away from me again. Not this time.”

Go home, Cassian.

“I don’t need someone to make me happy,” Nesta spat. “I can be happy independently of you.”

“You can have both.”

A cold, cruel laugh bubbled out of her. “Is that what you tell yourself every day when you pretend you can wear me down? Do you think I don’t know what you’re doing? That you’re hoping I’ll give in and accept a bond I have explicitly told you I do not want?”

Cassian didn’t let go of her. Instead, he pushed her hand back to her as if it disgusted him to hold onto her. Nesta caught how his black hair sifted, the strands shining in the starlight, just before she turned her back to him.

It wasn’t too late to catch the curl of his lip and the way hurt seized the green and brown of his eyes. “You think I lie to myself? Nesta, you pull the wool over your eyes every damn day!” The last three words were staccato, thudding after her as she all but spirited away from him on a storm wind. “You have wanted me since you met me. Admit it. You want me and I want you. It’s simple. It’s all simple if you’d just stop fighting—”

The audacity to insinuate that Nesta’s feelings were inconsequential was too much. It hurt more than anything else Cassian had ever said, the rest of his barbs merely needles to this blade. Because none of what was between them was simple. It was a tangled web of terror and confusion and a desperate need Nesta did not understand.

The ignorance—the implied slight at her intelligence—had Nesta whirling, cutting Cassian off mid-sentence. Magic thundered through her veins, her power barrelling to her palms. She had to expel it—had to let it out like a curdling scream. Without thinking, she flung out her hands.

Nesta’s magic flew, roaring silver flames closing the distance between them. All she cared about was making Cassian recoil when her fire sizzled into nothing millimetres from his face. All she needed to see was the froth of his anger as it finally boiled over and met hers. 

But Cassian moved quicker than Nesta had ever seen him. Red light shot from his siphons but this time there was no shield like there had been all of those months ago. Magic barrelled from his chest, his shoulders, his knees, the backs of his hands to meet hers—all of that magnificent power channelled towards her. 

Scarlet and silver lit up the clearing, bathing their surroundings like glistening blood. Nesta braced herself for the slamming impact, expected for them to both be thrown backwards, but that wasn’t what happened. Instead, her body was seized with a sudden vigour—like a wonderful, gasping breath. And their magic… it didn’t clash. No, their jets of power melded together, silver meeting red until it formed a smooth running stream. It glimmered, quiet and calm in contrast, like the calm and tranquil night sky.

It felt right and wonderful and infuriating. Even Nesta’s magic was betraying her. Even her power couldn’t help but want him, even when she was incandescent with rage for the warrior before her.

Unleashing a growl of anger, Nesta dropped her hands in defeat. They hung at her sides, a useless deadweight. She was panting hard, even though what she’d just done hadn’t exerted her—it had been easy and right and thrilling, as if she’d just woken up from a very long sleep.

For a moment, there was only silence. Cassian’s chest was heaving, his hair as wild as hers. His hands were still outstretched towards her, each and every one of his siphons activated and glowing. Like her, he was staring wide-eyed at the magic that hung overhead like a mist, their very own canvas of stars.

When his eyes flicked to hers, the shock in them was still stark. In fact, Nesta could have sworn she spied terror in them. He stepped forward—her Cassian—but Nesta stepped back. A disgruntled growl rumbled in the back of his throat, and then he was striding towards her before she could even think about moving away from him. Stopped when he was a breath away from her.

Pine and musk wound around her body in an invisible embrace and Nesta’s face crumpled at the familiarity of it. She wished she was curled up beside Cassian in bed, her limbs tangled in his, her nose buried in his neck. She wished she’d never challenged him for answers in the bedroom earlier. Wished she was still living in blissful ignorance.  

Two calloused hands came to frame her face and Nesta couldn’t find the will to shake them off. Couldn’t. 

“Nesta,” Cassian rasped.

Nesta managed to shake her head. Go away. Please.

Cassian’s expression broke even as it remained still. Nesta didn’t understand how, but it did. It was something behind his eyes—the faint flicker of his eyebrows as they dipped in and out of a frown. 

But Cassian didn’t drop his hands from her cheeks, as if he knew she didn’t really want him to leave her. Brushed his thumbs over her cheeks—wiping away the tracks of fury that had fallen from the corners of her eyes.

“Do you want me or not?” Cassian asked quietly, after a long while. His eyes searched into her silver eyes—pierced her soul. Flames danced in the reflection of his irises. And Nesta knew that this was taking everything for him to ask it out loud. “Do you want me, Nesta?”

Run, run, run, the Cauldron mused in Nesta’s head, as it cast that sleepy eye on her. 

Nesta shrugged out of Cassian’s embrace. Her movements were syrupy, as if the air around her had thickened, but still she managed to turn. Her entire body was shaking—whether it was from that leftover rage, or because her heart was breaking, Nesta wasn’t sure.

A sob heaved through her body but Nesta caught it before she made a sound. She couldn’t let Cassian see it. Couldn’t let him know how much she was affected by him. 

Slowly, Nesta walked to the cottage. She was still coated in Cassian’s magic, his scent on her tongue both divine and hellish. And that alone made her want to cry even more. It served as a reminder that she was constantly at war with herself. This battle that had been thrust upon her, chaining her free will and making her question everything.

“Leave me alone,” Nesta ordered flatly, without looking behind her.

Nesta didn’t know why she expected Cassian to stay. To fight. But the sound of beating wings filled Nesta’s ears just as she reached the backdoor. It felt as if someone had closed a fist around her heart, squeezing and squeezing until the blood ran dry and veins popped under the pressure. 

Frawley was waiting at the threshold, her expression grim. The witch held the door open in invitation.

But Nesta paused. Turned back to the paddock.

Cassian was gone.

Tags (let me know if you want to be added/removed): @arinbelle @superspiritfestival @sayosdreams @perseusannabeth @mylittlebigplanet @biggestwingspan-az @bellsqueen @ekaterinakostrova @bookstantrash @prophecyerised @rainbowcheetah512 @awesomelena555 @wannawriteyouabook @lovelynesta @melphss @laylaameer01 @a-trifling-matter @grouchycritic7794 @thalia-2-rose @champanheandluxxury @swankii-art-teacher @princessconsuela02 @lavendergoomsltd @princessofmerchants-reads @jeakat @sjm-things @imwritingthesewords @nestable @inejbrekkxr @silvernesta @inyourmindeye @amelie775 @helen-the-weirdo @pizzaneverdisappoints @wishfulimaginings @trash-for-nessian @my-fan-side @sophilightwood @valkyriesupremacy @vidalinav @onceupona-chaos @inardour @thesunremembersyourface @teagoddess99 @ellies-iced-coffee @nehemikkele @misswonderflower @nessiantrashh @kawaiteacup

[sodasback]

Ex BF - Part 2

Drew Starkey x Reader

Part 1

You guys, I changed my mind, this one just works so much better as a Drew Starkey fic ...so fuck it, I’m just gonna post what I had on my deactivated blog. 

It had been months since you ran into Josh on set at Drew’s work. Luckily, Drew was only in a couple scenes for that project and he only worked on that show one more day without running into Josh. Now, you, Drew and a lot of the Outer Banks crew were all in LA again and going out to a bar.

Unfortunately for you, and everyone that night, Josh and his friends were at the same bar.

“Oh hey, it’s y/n and her movie star boyfriend, Andrew.” Josh said as he appeared next to you and drunkenly leaned an arm on your shoulder. If looks could kill, the look on Drew’s face would have for sure been the death of Josh. It was a mixture of shock and rage at the audacity of this guy. Drew was so taken aback, he didn’t know how to react.

You uncomfortably chuckled and squirmed out from under Josh’s arm to stand in front of Drew quickly, not knowing if Drew’s truly calm nature could be tested any further. “Mhmm, great to see you Josh.” You stated dismissively.

Your effort to separate them was lost as Drew instantly and easily maneuvered you behind him protectively. You turned for the bar as quickly as possible, hoping to end the situation there, so you grabbed Drew’s hand to pull him along with you.

“Aww, y/n/n, you’re not gonna stay and let me get to know your little boyfriend?”

You felt dead weight behind you as you tried to pull Drew away. 

“Bro, I’m telling you right now, back the fuck off.” Drew stated. You whirled around to get in front of him, as Josh took a step forward and titled his chin up, “Or what?”

You put your hands on Drew’s chest. He easily looked over your head to continue glaring at Josh.

“Drew” you said sternly. He glanced down at you for a second, before looking back up at Josh. Josh smirked and waited to see what Drew was gonna do. “He’s not worth it. Trust me.” You said. Drew looked down at you and softened. 

He wrapped an arm around your shoulder an you wrapped both arms around his waist to walk to the bar. 

“You know, as hot as you are when you get all scary like that. I really really don’t want you getting in a fight because I have an absolutely horrible ex boyfriend.” 

You emphasized the first part of this sentence, but Drew just gave you a deadpan stare. He knew you were trying to flirt with him to get him to relax. And you knew it was too late at this point. As evolved and emotionally intelligent as Drew was, he had now entered caveman mode. Josh challenging him because of you triggered instincts deep within him to meet that challenge aka defending your honor. ...1 point toxic masculinity, 0 points non-violent female empowerment.

At this point in your life, you were happy. You had everything you wanted in your career. You had a beautiful apartment. Your family was healthy. You had the best friends you could ask for. And of course, you had Drew. Drew was the one. He was your soulmate. Your best friend. And you knew it. You didn’t feel the need to put Josh in his place any more. You just wanted to keep enjoying your life. You had time to make peace with what Josh did to you and you felt like you moved past it and him. Yeah, you felt like you were past it, you tried to convince yourself. It had been years since the incident happened and you and Josh broke up...

Flashback

You and Josh were 20 and had been on and off for a couple years. One night, you had both been out, when you started fighting, something that wasn’t new to your relationship. Josh had been flirting with another girl a lot of the night and gaslighting you to make you feel like you were imagining it. As you brought up the flirting again, he was reaching for his car keys. You were pissed that he was using this tactic again. He would leave until you calmed down and started to worry about him so much that you would just finally give in and forget the fight, instead of holding him accountable. You were so mad at him for making you feel like you were crazy and for always manipulating you by leaving. You couldn’t stop the words from coming out of your mouth, “Sure, just leave again. Fucking typical, Josh. Like father, like son, I guess.”

And before you could even process what happened, the whole right side of your face was stinging, a cut near eye was bleeding from his ring and your ears were ringing. Josh had just backhanded you hard. Time stood still for a moment as your hand went to cradle your cheek. You were absolutely shocked.

“Oh fuck. You okay?” 

You finally looked up at him with an unreadable expression on your face. “..don’t make this a big deal, okay? That was a really shitty thing to say and you just made me so mad, I couldn’t help i-” At that point, you stormed into the bedroom and locked the door. He now was faced with you being upset and maybe even losing you; he started knocking on the door and apologizing profusely after realizing your reaction. You were completely blocking out all the noise coming from the other side of the door as you tried to gather your thoughts. 

Okay, that was a really low blow. Yeah, but he HIT you.

I definitely shouldn’t have said that. But he HIT you.

Maybe I deserved it. No, he HIT you. You continued to argue with yourself.

What would you tell your y/bff’s/n if this happened to her?

What would your mom or dad tell you right now?

If he did it once, he could do it again.

...this isn’t the first time you’ve been scared of him.

...but he seems genuinely really sorry.

You opened the door to find Josh sitting on the ground leaning against the wall. He looked at you scared and hopeful, tears rolling down his cheeks.

“I’m sorry for what I said. It was really unfair and hurtful of me.” You stated genuinely.

Relief washed over his face for a second, “I’m so sorry baby. I swear that will never happen again.” He said, as he got up and he started to make his way to hug you. 

“Yeah, I know it will never happen again...” you held your hand out to stop him from touching you, confusion now evident in his expression, “because we’re done.”

His face dropped, expression now being somewhere between confused, angry and disappointed. Josh wasn’t used to you putting up boundaries and not letting him get away with all the shit he pulled. “Y/N-” he started. 

“No.” You said adamantly, “Frankly, I don’t care how sorry you are. I don’t care how much I pissed you off. I don’t care how much you promise that will never happen again. Our relationship was toxic before what just happened. I know I’m not perfect and I have a lot of things to work on. But I 1000% know in my bones, that I WILL NEVER let you hit me again. I deserve better. We’re done. I’m going to my parents’ house. I’m coming back tomorrow between 10 and 2 to get my stuff. Don’t be here.”

A couple months later, you had a text from an unknown number. It was Josh borrowing a friend’s phone to text you, since you blocked any way he had to contact you. He apologized. He held himself accountable. There was no deflecting or manipulating in the message and he promised he would never contact you again. You replied: “Thank you for your apology. Yes, I’d appreciate it if you don’t contact me again.”

And that was it. You ran into him briefly at the grocery store once and you had been in a really good mood. Your interaction was light and almost flirty. You felt so ashamed about it later, but you hadn’t seen or heard from Josh again until years later, with Drew on set. And little did you know, seeing you with Drew set something off in Josh that he just couldn’t let go.

-

As you stood at the bar, waiting for the bartender’s attention, you turned to see the caveman version of your gorgeous boyfriend still glaring, his fists clenching and unclenching.

“Babe.” You said and he looked at you.

“He’s got fuckin nerve.” He said shaking his head and you took a deep breath ready for the rant, “First off, called me a movie star. I am a serious actor, Y/N.” 

You couldn’t help but laugh at Drew being offended anything this asshole said and Drew’s eyes widened at you and you stifled a giggle while you laced your hands around his neck to appease him, “Mhmm” you encouraged. 

“And then he called me ‘Andrew’“ Drew went on. And you nodded and gave him a sympathetic pout, “I know, I heard.”

“And THEN, he has the AUDACITY to put his fucking arm around you?! Bro, I’m heateddddd-” He continued, barely paying attention to you as you leaned your body against his. You ignored the fact that he just called you bro and tried a different tact. 

“Drew, stop. You can’t get into a bar fight. Think about your job.”

“I don’t care about my job. I care about you.”

“That’s not true. You do care about your job. And I know you care about me. But if you get into a fight right now, it’s not gonna change what he did to me. It was a long time ago. We’re not together anymore. I’m over it. Punching him is not gonna do anything except jeopardize your future.”

Drew still had his fight face on, “Well, knocking that smirk off his fucking face would sure make me feel better.” He said and you scowled at him. “And for the record, I don’t think you’re over it. And you don’t have to be. You never have to be over it. And that doesn’t mean you aren’t fucking strong and badass.” 

You were quiet as you contemplated what Drew said. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, before looking at you. “Okay” he said softly. 

 “Thank you” you said softly before you pulled him down to kiss him. After a minute of you successfully distracting him with a pretty passionate slow kiss, you felt Drew melt a little. 

“Hey, I’m sorry. Do you want to leave? Like do you not feel like being out anymore?” He asked sweetly.

“No, I’m okay. He’s just being a drunk asshole.” You turned away to grab the drinks the bartender poured for you and Drew, “We probably won’t even see him for the rest of the night.” 

You turned back and realized caveman Drew was now glaring at Josh again as you spoke, “..or not.” You rolled your eyes.

Despite the bad beginning, you and your friends ended up having fun as the night went on. And you and Drew proceeded to drink. Which was probably not the smartest decision. You were both feistier when you drank and you knew Drew’s natural state of calmness was only going to wear off as the night went on.

Eventually, you had to go to the bathroom. But you didn’t trust Josh to not instigate something with Drew while you were gone and you didn’t trust Drew to not try and avenge your honor while you were gone either. So you found Austin, Chase and JD. Chase and JD were only half-listening as they watched whatever game was on the tvs at the semi-crowded bar. 

“Guys, I need you to watch Drew while I go pee.” You said. Drew rolled his eyes and hung his head back with a groan.

“What’s the rig?” Austin asked, ironically using his favorite word as he put one arm on your shoulder and the other on Drew’s.

“Drew is trying to fight my ex-boyfriend and you need to stop him from ruining his career and/or going to jail for assault.” You looked at Drew as you finished your sentence remind him that he could get in serious trouble for getting in a fight. Drew scoffed as Austin looked to him for confirmation of what you were saying.

“He called me a movie star dude” Drew said.

“Oooff” Austin agreed that this was a major dig.

“And then he called me ‘Andrew’“

“Ahhh man�� Austin commiserated, “This kid deserves to get hit for sure.”

“Austin!” You scolded, “You are not helping!”

“Bro, that’s not even half of it. Like what he did to Y/N; he deserves to get the absolute shit beat out of him, I promise you-”

“Okay, stop! We’re not discussing this. Chase, JD, you are in charge of Drew. Keep him occupied while I go pee and don’t let him ruin his entire life by getting in a stupid bar fight. And Austin, stop encouraging him and keep your mouth shut til I get back please!” You commanded, as you pushed Drew and Austin toward Chase and JD. JD gave you a salute while he put his arm around Drew’s shoulders. 

While you were gone, Drew was drunk and spilling all your business, trying to get all 3, also drunk, boys on his side. “Guys, you don’t even know. This guy is the biggest asshole.”

“Wait, is he really? Or do you just not like him because he’s y/n’s ex?” JD asked.

“No dude. First of all, he like cheated on her a bunch of times; he was super manipulative and .. he fucking hit her once dude.”

The all looked at each other, “What the fuck?!”

“Like hit her?”

“Yeahhhhhh, like physically hit her face.”

“Well you are completely justified, brother.”

“Yeah, we have your back man, whatever happens.” They all nodded and broke out of their little huddle.

“Look! No fighting!” Chase said proudly when you got back, opening up his arms.

“Good job Chase. Gold star” You said returning his quick side hug.

The group decided it was time to go to one more bar, so you all walked out the back ext into a big alley. Where, of course, Josh and his friends were smoking and noticed your crew before you noticed them.

“You think her movie star boyfriend knows what an uptight little prude she used to be?” Josh said to his friend loud enough for you to hear. You honestly didn’t even care about what Josh said, you knew he was trying to get Drew to react. And you knew even your sweet, soft Drew was not immune to anger getting the best of him. Drew stopped walking, still slightly turned away from Josh and just shook his head, not believing Josh’s audacity. 

Even though the guys had been supportive when they were talking to Drew about fighting Josh, no one actually wanted that to happen. So Austin was quickly by Drew’s side, “Don’t do it bro. It’s not worth it.”

“Drew.” You said trying, to get him to focus on you. Unfortunately, you were with a group of boys full of testosterone and Chase was also feeling feisty and protective. 

“Hey, why don’t you shut the fuck up bro” Chase said, taking a step toward Josh, but luckily a level-headed JD was immediately pushing Chase softly backward. 

“Ooh maybe, she’s not such a prude anymore. Maybe she’s sleeping with the whole cast; they’re all so protective of her.” Josh laughed.

“Josh stop! What the fuck is wrong with you?” You yelled at him. And Drew was instantly moving in front of you, “You need to stop talking right now man.” Drew said in a tone that made the hair on your arms stand up. You could feel the tension rolling off Drew.

“Drew calm down. Please.” You pleaded as he looked down at you.

“Y/n, I can’t let him talk about you that way.”

“He’s trying to get under your skin. That’s what he wants.”

“Yeah, well it’s fucking working.”

“Drew, come on. Let’s just go home.” He began to give in as you pulled his arm. 

Josh was obviously determined for a fight, because the next thing that came out of his mouth made it impossible for anyone to stop Drew.

“Hey good luck with y/n, man. I treated her like trash for years and she still came running back to me, bitch has got issu-” And before he could utter another word, Drew’s fist connected with his jaw. 

“Fuck.” You cursed as your hands went through your hair and you backed up between Austin, Chase and JD.

Josh recovered and hit Drew in the eye. 

You gasped. Turning into JD’s chest and he protectively wrapped his arms around you. Drew hit Josh again and he fell to the ground. Drew bent over him and punched him again. “Don’t you ever fucking talk about her again!” He yelled through gritted teeth, “Don’t look at her again. And if you EVER touch her again, I swear to God-” he spat in between a few more punches. 

“Drew! Please!” You yelled and finally Austin pulled him back. “That’s enough, bro.” 

“Come on” JD still had his arms around you, walking you away from everything. 

Drew was breathing heavy and trying to overcome his adrenaline. You and JD were already around the corner with most of the group. 

“Come on, let’s go” Chase ushered Drew away with Austin. And they followed in the same direction. Drew saw you walking ahead of him. 

“Y/N” he called after you softly. You stopped and turned around. He was already right there enveloping you in his arms. 

“Fuck y/n. I’m so sorry.” He muttered kissing the top of your head. You just kept holding each other while the group called Ubers. 

You pulled away from him a little, “Are you okay?” You asked trying to get a look at the bruise forming on his face. “Yeah, baby. I’m fine. I’m so sorry I did that. I’m sorry I put you in this situation.” He said, hugging you again. After a long pause, you pulled up and looked up at him:

“Thank you.” You stated genuinely and Drew looked at you surprised. But while you continued to look at each other, you both understood without saying anything more. You both knew it wasn’t okay that Drew just got in a fight. And you both knew you didn’t need your boyfriend to defend you honor, but you were thankful someone finally had.

Taglist: @moniamaybank @abbyj1822 @october-cameron @hernameisnoell @railmerafe @stupidpendeja @lemur46 @phantompogues 

[imthatchishiyasimp]

HELLOOOOO!!!

I'm freaking out this is my first post, like the first one shot I post and write about AIB and Chishiya.

I really hope you all like it, please please please tell me what you think about it and whatever you want to tell me.

It's long (4444 words), I know, but I hate small things because I get upset. It's very close to the story and it doesn't have lot's of changes, I wanted to try first to write about something I know. In the future I will write more original and new stuff. Also, I wanted to get used to the universe and to the characters first.

HAVE A NICE READ 💚

“THIS WAY TO THE GAME ARENA”

The sign flashes all around the city. I slowly walk towards the Toei Sendagaya block apartment, focused on the cube in my hands. Due to having no electricity, I’ve gotten used to pick random things from stores to entertain myself.

It’s still shocking to feel the city so silent and calm, and at the same time it feels terrifying. One would think that being that people die every day, the streets would be forgiving. You can’t even lower your guard now. Even since the first day, I’ve liked walking around the streets, checking out shops and random apartments. I kinda feel powerful, but it’s something that deep inside I know it’s just fake and limited. And I’m not giving up, but at least I’m going to enjoy now that I can, until ‘they’ decide that I’m not needed around anymore.

The tall complex shines between the bushes and buildings, its lights on every floor lighted on. I place myself a few meters hidden behind the stairs leading to the central lobby. From there, I sit and watch people climb the stairs. A couple of them look pretty scared and lost, showing signs of this being their first game. The rest all look shaken up but used to this. When it looks like no one else will come, I get up and get to the crowd around the phones.

There’s thirteen people waiting and all of them look at me while I pick the phone from the table. When the facial recognition is finished I can see that there’s only a few seconds left for the game to start. Almost didn’t make it. Would have been stupid to die because I was daydreaming.

‘Move aside’ I say to Chishiya, elbowing him after not having a response. He looks at me annoyed and slips off his earphones. He finally moves to let me place my back at the wall and get my hair in a bun.

“REGISTRATION HAS CLOSED. THERE ARE A TOTAL OF 14 PARTICIPANTS. THE GAME WILL NOW COMMENCE.”

It’s so easy to point out who the newcomers are and the ones that are sick of playing. You can also name who’s going to be willing to put themselves first and who’s going to scary run the whole game.

I start rolling the sleeves of my sweatshirt up when a boy with a cap starts talking to some guys. They look lost, but not new to this. Might be the first week here. I eye them from my spot, not saying a thing but listening to the whole exchange.

“Excuse me, do you know what this is?” He asks a black haired boy. Honestly, he looks a mess, like he has just gotten up from bed and hasn't changed in a few days. “I ended up here and I have no idea what’s going on”.

“It’s a game” He answers. At the same time, the blonde man next to him, probably his friend, tells him to stop it. I chuckle and cover it up with a cough, earning myself a glare from both Chishiya and Aguni. I might be prone to get in trouble with people and they won’t be happy if I screw a game up. Better be quiet.

The blonde guy whispers to his friend and I try to pick something up from the conversation. Not get close to the new ones and something else.

“DIFFICULTY: FIVE OF SPADES”

The card flashes on our phones, telling us the kind of game and the level of difficulty. I was so curious about the card when I got to my first game, I didn’t know what it meant and what I was supposed to do with it. I’m a bit ashamed to admit that I admire the cleverness behind the rules and the method of the games. It’s the work of both a psycho and a genius.

A sporty girl starts to stretch just after the card shows, so she must know what it means. She’s calm and collected and I bet she’s willing to put all of us on the killing zone before she goes down. We could be friends, I think.

I hear a sigh next to me and I catch a glimpse of Chishiya rolling his eyes. He doesn’t exactly hate physical games, but they sometimes mean having to run or climb and he’s not a fan of working out. And, even though he won’t admit it, he doesn’t like having his white hoodie dirty. Not going to judge, I don’t love spades games either, but I will choose them over the hearts ones a million times.

I get down to tie my shoes tighter just in case. I would hate tripping like the clown I really am in front of all these people. Some guy in a hat starts explaining to the two friends from before what it means a spades game. Club games are hard if there are more newcomers than experienced people. I mean, if it's a game where team work means everything, you bet you prefer working with someone who knows the way around the games. Diamond ones are a bit weird: being clever will get you through them, but sometimes the answer is so straightforward that you get lost looking for the catch. Heart games are the worst. They will kill you even if you survive, and pray that you don’t get to play with a friend or someone you know.

“GAME: A GAME OF TAG.”

“RULE: RUN AWAY FROM THE TAGGER.”

“CLEAR CONDITION: DISCOVER THE SAFEZONE HIDDEN IN ONE OF THE BUILDING ROOMS WITHIN THE TIME LIMIT. YOU CLEAR THE GAME WHEN THIS OBJECTIVE IS FULFILLED.”

“TIME LIMIT: 20 MINUTES.”

“AFTER 20 MINUTES HAS PASSED, THE TIME BOMB HIDDEN IN THE BUILDING WILL EXPLODE.”

I turn around to face Chishiya, grinning like a mad girl. He doesn’t even flinch when he stops me from talking. “No, I’m not racing you to the top.”

“But…” I sigh and watch as everyone starts running to the stairs like lost puppies. “You are so mean”. I punch him in the shoulder and cross my arms, walking towards the lift. No need running seven floors up and wasting energy if I’m not even going to be able to brag about having won a race.

Chishiya follows closely behind, probably guessing I’m going to try and leave him there.

“TWO MINUTES BEFORE THE GAME STARTS.”

We get inside the lift and silently wait until we get to the seventh floor. It’s been a long time since I used one, not everyday you get to play in a building apartment. Feels nice, and like we’re back to normal.

Once we get to the top, we both choose a position that lets us have a good look at the whole complex. He goes to one wing while I leave for the other one. No point leaving a flank unseen. I take my cube out and restart it, keeping an eye on the people looking around scattered through the floors. I don’t get why someone would choose saying in the lower ground when a tagger is supposed to chase you through the whole building. Dude, that’s the most critical place to start.

“Hey, don’t get distracted with those games of yours.”

“Don’t be mean, Chishiya. You know I’m paying attention.” Anyway, once I finish the cube, I keep it in my pocket and rest my arms on the banister.

Aguni and his new friend get to the seventh floor and both of us wave towards him. Like always, he completely ignores us and keeps walking towards another high point.

“That’s nasty” Chishiya says and I nod along. Aguni is always so serious during games, it’s boring.

“I place my bet on those two guys and the sporty girl surviving”. I firmly say. They look like they will make it, but not without having a rough time.

He has the audacity to snort and laugh at me and I look at him surprised. “You’re joking. Everyone looks like they’re about to die, as usual. Just look at them, they don’t know shit about what to do”.

“Were you this calm in your first games? Don’t be mean, they are trying their best. No one wants to die.”

“But, where you that stupid?” He says while pointing to a couple of girls on the second floor who are touching their phones desperately. “I’m not saying you gotta be a genius from the start, but if you don’t collect yourself quickly, you are already dead.”

“Well, my majesty, not all of us are like you, and some people need a little more time, and a little more help.”

Chishiya looks at me and, as if I had imagined, a caring and sorry look crosses his eyes. He probably remembers the first time he saw me get through the games and how I completely lost it once. It wasn’t easy.

“THE GAME WILL NOW COMMENCE.”

He nudges my arm with his elbow and I look at him.

“THE TIME LIMIT IS 20 MINUTES.”

“Hey” He says with a soft voice.

“GAME START.”

“Don’t die this time.”

“Wasn't planning to.”

“THE TAGGER IS NOW ON THE MOVE.”

As if we all had planned it, the whole complex goes silent, trying to locate this said tagger. A trumpet goes off and everyone looks scared, ready to bolt to wherever they can.

The sound of the lift’s doors can be heard from our position, so the tagger is probably on the sixth or fifth floor.

Not a penny drop can be heard. Not a breath.

Some people start walking and try to open doors. The rest are all watching closely until something happens.

And it does.

Gunshots run through the dense air that surrounds us. I try to see where they come from and I finally catch sight of the tagger. Probably a man, judging for the height, with a horse head and a really mean gun. He’s on the sixth floor, just in front of the stairs.

I point at him and nudge Chishiya, but I already know that he has seen him.

There’s now thirteen of us.

And then shots are fired again and we can see the two friends and the one with the hat running down the stairs, away from the tagger.

“Told you, they are gonna get killed.” Chishiya says with a smirk.

“Oh shut up, this is not a TV show we are talking about. And I have faith in them”.

They split up on the third floor, the hat man keeps going down while the other two try to hide in the hallway. Not long after, on the ground floor that the tagger chases and shots the first one and finds another man freaking out. I don’t know if it’s better that he died because he went off the game zone instead of being shot by the tagger. Anyway, he’s also dead. And that makes three dead players.

Eleven participants left.

“See, they are smart. At least the cute one”. I say smiling.

Chishiya looks at me and raises an eyebrow, silently questioning just what I said.

“What? It’s not like I’m lying; he is cute, and smart.” I laugh and wink at him, cutting eye contact with him. If we are going to have an awkward moment, please don’t be while we are playing for our lives.

The killing spree of the tagger continues with the pretty and lost two girls. They sure are on their first game, because they look so freaking scared and unprepared. I mean, who would have come with heels and handbags. I scoff and shake my head watching how one of them falls dead and the other one wastes an incredible opportunity of getting away while the tagger reloads. Well, not all of us are strong enough to leave our friend and not panic at the same time. Shame she has to die, anyway.

So now we are nine players still alive.

Looks like everything’s gone silent again, until shouts break the silence and we all look for the source. It’s the cute guy and I laugh when I understand what he’s saying.

“Everyone! The tagger is currently at the second level of the central area! The tagger has bad vision because of his mask! Let’s inform each other of the tagger’s location and search for the safezone together!”

“Oh my god, did he seriously turn a spades game into a club’s one?” I laugh again and Chishiya scoffs under his hood. “I want to be best friends with him”.

“Don’t be stupid.” Chishiya says. We move a bit to see where they are going now that they are all running. “It’s a good idea, not going to lie, but no one will answer him.”

He mutters something else, but I don’t really catch it. I think I saw the tagger doubt his step when he heard the guy shouting, but he definitely looks annoyed when the sporty girl shouts back.

“The tagger is moving from the fourth level of the central area! Anyone nearby, run!”

I celebrate and raise my hands, clapping and laughing in Chishiya’s face. He looks surprised and tells me to shut it.

The girl runs from the tagger and finds an elderly woman in the hallway. With the tagger on their back, they are probably going to get killed. I grip the banister and hold my breath. She seems friendly and clever, I’m internally rooting for her.

Suddenly she jumps off the balcony and starts climbing the pipes up to the next floor. The other woman dies behind her, and the tagger tries to catch the girl but fails.

“She’s pretty good.” Chishiya mutters. “You just wish you could do that. It’s called envy”.

“As if you could do that too. You are just as weak as me.”

“Hey! Don’t throw me in the same casket!”

“EIGHT MINUTES UNTIL THE GAME ENDS.”

“THERE ARE CURRENTLY EIGHT SURVIVORS.”

Already? We should start moving.

I look at Chishiya under my hair and he frowns at something. I follow his gaze and see the tagger looking at the cap boy from an upside floor. What’s shocking it’s him starting to shoot from there. He has been killing just people he casually finds while walking around, not shooting from that distance.

The boy goes down, but looks unharmed. The two friends are on the same floor and get to him, running away from the door he was trying to open.

Not bothering to ask Chishiya if he got that, I start jumping on the place and keep my phone in my pockets. He slides off the hood and shoves me towards the stairs.

“Shall we, ma’am?”

“THERE ARE FIVE MINUTES REMAINING.”

From the corner of my eye I catch Aguni intercepting the boys and I make a face. It doesn’t always go well when he does that, he tends to let them die in order to have his way. The sporty girl stops to talk to them and she starts jumping from floor to floor.

“Do you think someone’s going to get it too?” I ask out loud. Chishiya shrugs and keeps on walking. I tsk and stay behind him when we get to the hallway. I turn around and watch my back, even though I heard a fight somewhere near. Probably Aguni, who are we kidding.

Just when we are arriving at the safezone apartment, the cute boy appears from the other side.

“Cute boy! I’m glad you realized it!” I happily say without thinking. I mouth a silent sorry when he looks at me a bit perplexed. Chishiya elbows me, hard, and I whine a bit. That’s mean.

He picks the doorknob first, but doesn’t open it. The three of us are watching closely, and honestly I’m a bit nervous about the time. I don’t like risking it as much as Chishiya.

“Aren’t you going to open it?” he asks.

The boy answers a couple of seconds after, lost in his thoughts “Why did the tagger chase us? He could have just waited here.”

He is onto something. Now, I’m not liking this at all.

“Seems like there’s something else we don’t know.” Chishiya says, keeping his calm exterior. He’s going to use this poor boy in case he has any doubt of a risk. “However,” he adds, taking his phone out “if you don’t open it…”

There are three minutes left.

Sweat starts running down my back, making me shiver and hold my breath while I watch the boy start turning the doorknob. All our phones beep announcing the time left until we all die with the bomb.

Slowly, he opens the door with caution. We all walk inside, in silence and with darkness surrounding us. It 's empty. No furniture, neither personal objects nor some leftovers of someone’s life. A few steps in we notice a door at the end of the room and we all walk towards it.

It’s not until we are too far inside that another tagger walks out behind the door.

“Look out!” the boy screams and pushes us out of the shot range.

Gunshots fly around the apartment and I duck behind the bathroom door. Chishiya uses the taser and the tagger goes down, but recovers quickly and starts shooting again. I scream when a bullet gazes at my arm. It fucking hurts, but at least the bullet didn’t got me completely.

I can hear the apartment door being shut and the other door at the end closing too. They must have gotten through them. I hope they aren’t harmed.

I wait, trying not to make any sound in case the tagger comes to finish me off. I search through the room, but nothing seems lethal enough to use like a weapon. I hate bringing weapons to games, I don’t really want to kill anyone if I can help it.

Gunshots are fired and I cover myself up, even though they are not directed towards me. Fighting blade weapons? I’m okay with that. Fighting people? Not against it. But, I have nothing towards a gun. I mean, it can take me from a long distance! No point.

“Everyone! The safezone is in apartment 406! It’s impossible to clear the game alone! We need two people to do this!”

Are you kidding? This is so mean. What if you were the only survivor? Not fair, not at all.

Well, it seems like I should get moving and try to do something useful in this game. I haven’t done shit, now that I think about it.

Slowly, I open the door just in time to see the tagger shoot the door and break the safelock. I take small steps following it, ready to throw myself to placate it. Just when the gun is going up I jump and kick the tagger in the knee, managing to bring it to the floor.

I hear a scream coming from the tagger and a lady cursing from behind the mask. She starts shooting and I scream trying to cover myself without being hit. The guy bolts and tries to help me get her off the gun, but she keeps fighting like a mad person.

We both go down before she gets us with the bullets and I catch a glimpse of Chishiya at the door, trying to help but having to cover himself because of the lost shots.

The phones all inform us of the ten seconds remaining at the same time that the sporty girl jumps through the glass of the balcony. The tagger kicks me and gets the gun pointing at my face and I panic just a bit before I push back. The other guy tries to help me, but with no help.

“Hey!” Chishiya shouts.

I’m on the floor fighting the tagger with the gun under my chin, trying to get it off my face, but I see him throwing the taser to the girl and she quickly gets the tagger down.

I let out a sigh before I heard the time almost coming to an end. My eyes search for him and we lock our gazes. I can feel the breath we are both holding and the silent words running through our minds. My fingers clench and I swallow, accepting death like a forgotten friend, saying goodbye with a blink.

But, just like that, with a blink, it all finishes. The buttons are pressed on the last second and we all hear the beeps from our phones.

“GAME CLEAR.”

“CONGRATULATIONS.”

In that same moment, the tagger gets the mask off and we can see an old lady crying looking at us. The collar in her neck starts beeping faster and faster and I scramble to get away from her. Chishiya grabs both my arms and I scream at the touch in the bullet gaze from before, but he doesn’t let go and gets me away at the same time that the collar explodes, killing the lady.

My whole back is covered in blood and I roughly grab Chishiya’s hoodie. I don’t want to look at her and see what we did, even though it was unintended. She was also playing, and she died because we won.

Chishiya and I are left in the room with the dead tagger, and he grips my hand and makes me let go of him. He starts checking the pockets of the lady and gets something out, but I don’t register exactly what.

I get out of the apartment to breathe. I hate this part where we really think about what went down here. Lots of people died, and we got a few days to live just to have to risk it again in the next game. Could have we saved someone? Not really, I know that. But it doesn’t make it easier anyway.

“I’m Arisu.” Someone says beside me. I turn and the cute boy is there, watching me from a distance. “I wanted to thank you, for risking yourself back there. We are alive thanks to all of you.” He sticks out his hand to me and waits.

I’m speechless. No one has thanked me like this in any game. I didn’t really do a thing, but he’s thanking me. I should be the one doing it, he cooperated with the other girl and they stopped the bomb. We could have died there.

I let out a small laugh and shake his hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Arisu. And thanks to you, you did the dirty work inside the room.”

I look back inside and watch Chishiya stick the paper in his hoodie and walk towards us.

“I look forward to meeting you somewhere else, hopefully not dead in a game. Be careful and enjoy the warm water in the ocean now that we are all alone in the city.”

With a wink, I walk out of the apartment building with Chishiya not too far behind. I think he heard me talking to Arisu, but he doesn’t comment on it.

We walk, and we walk, and we walk. Neither of us likes to go back to the Beach in the cars, so we always take a stroll through the streets, enjoying the silence and the stars shining above us.

“Does it hurt?” he asks.

“Mmh?” I look at him questioning and he nods to my bleeding arm. “Oh, yes, like a bitch. But I’ll have to wait until we get there.”

He tsks and grabs my arm, leading us to a pharmacy around the corner. I don’t say anything, knowing he will shut me up and will only be a waste of time. We get inside and he starts looking for some disinfectant and bandages.

He knows his stuff. I was surprised at first to discover he knows his way around the medical grounds; and I’m glad he does. It doesn't hurt having someone nearby capable of dealing with nasty wounds.

He silently works and I watch him closely. He’s handsome. And he knows it, that’s why he smirks feeling my gaze on his face. I trace his features taking my time. His eyes are the most scary thing I’ve ever met. They hold so much knowledge and feelings. I always feel like he could take me apart just with his eyes. He mostly covers his emotions, so even though you search for micro expressions, you will come empty handed almost always.

I bring my free hand up and run my fingers through his hair. I love it, it’s so smooth and soft. And the fact that he always wears white to match his hair makes me smile like an idiot.

Chishiya clears his throat and starts covering up the wound. My hand drops and rests in his arm, basking in the heat he’s making.

Once he’s done, he brings down my sleeves and looks me in the eye, silently checking if I’m okay. I nod and take his hand, quickly gripping and, just as fast, letting go. I can hear him sigh behind me, and he follows behind.

“You know, I’m glad I met you here, but I would have prefered meeting you in the real world.”

“Why?”

“Because I know I will be safer here with you, but I also know the probability of us having a happy ending is minimal while we are here.”

“You are not wrong.” A couple of minutes goes by until he adds: “But that doesn’t mean you can’t try and make the most of it while you are alive. It will hurt more, but at this point, who cares?”

I let out a breathy laugh and turn around to hug him. Hard. He stops and lets me hug him, finally giving in and hugging me back. I hide my face in his neck, breathing deep and closing my eyes. I can feel his pulse and his chin coming down on my head, his hand running through my back.

“You are an idiot.”

“And you are mean. Deal with it.”

I swear I can feel his lips kissing the top of my head, but it’s so fast I can’t be sure. He starts walking again and I run to catch him before I lose him.

We may have a complicated relationship, if you can call it that. We are there for each other, not sure of what to do, what to give, what to take. But we do not give up. I’m just glad I’m not alone, and thankful that I have someone looking out for me.

I smile all the way to the Beach.

[capricorn-stark]

Headphones

pairing: dick grayson x reader, established relationship, fluff

warning: mild language, yet another late night idea that came to me from absolutely nowhere

a/n: IM ALIVE!!!!

The music in your headphones were blasting at levels that you knew would make you deaf a little too early in life, but personally, you were enjoying yourself a little too much to really care.

After all, didn’t everyone tell you to live life in the moment? Sure, usually they weren’t implying that you needed to destroy your health and hearing in order to accomplish that, but anyways - you were enjoying your little session of listening to music and casually tapping through your phone.

Or you were, until someone had the audacity to take your headphones right off of your head.

Your reaction of hey! was met with an obnoxious laugh from Dick as he slid them over his own ears, much to your chagrin. 

“This is what you were listening to?” he asked, avoiding your attempts at smacking him to get the headphones back with perfect ease. “This is why you were ignoring me while I was tryna talk to you for the past five minutes-”

“You weren’t even here!” You protested loudly as you were forced to actually set your phone down and think about moving from the couch to get them. You could never get a break these days. “I literally didn’t even see you!”

“I was right over there across from the armchair!” he insisted in return, and you finally let out a very deep sigh as you pushed yourself out of your seat. You would return, after you took your rightful property back from your jerk of a boyfriend you totally hadn’t ignored. On purpose. “I was trying to talk to you about going out, ‘cus I got a day off tomorrow-” Dick laughed and dodged another one of your attempts to steal them back. “-and I thought you’d be into the idea, but I guess not-”

“I am into the idea!” Attempting to yank his arm down with just your incredible brute strength and sheer power clearly wasn’t working. The guy’s biceps were made of steel or something. Little perks of being an acrobat. “Just not while you steal my stuff-”

“What’s mine is yours and what’s yours in mine, babe,” he told you with infuriating serenity as he evaded yet another one of your brilliant tactics to grab them back. “And sharing is caring - you have some interesting songs in this playlist.” 

“We can’t all listen to 80′s boybands, can we-” 

“That’s what Babs thinks I listen to!” he protested with a groan, grin breaking for just a second as he pressed a hand to his head. Alas, he didn’t break long enough for you to get them, blocking your hands just before you could touch the headphones. Victory had been so close, yet so far away. “Ha, nice try - and for the record, I don’t know why she thinks 80′s boybands are the music to my soul-” 

“I heard you listening to New Kids on the Block last week!”

“It was a moment of weakness!” he repeated insistently for the five-hundredth time since the incident had taken place, groaning yet again while his face flushed pink. “You weren’t supposed to see that!”

“Dick, I’ve seen your 80′s boyband playlist on Spotify, you don’t have to keep denying it,” you deadpanned, actually pausing from your endeavor for a second to give him a disbelieving look. 

“What?” Clearly, this was news to him, because he paused from trying to dart away from you as well. “When?” 

“You made it a public playlist.” 

“What?” The shock in his voice and the way his eyes widened actually made you almost laugh. “No way - there’s no way I - dammit!” 

You had managed to back him all the way up to the side of the sofa, surprising him with a push that landed him smack on his back across it, allowing you to let out a triumphant laugh of victory before climbed over him and took back what was rightfully yours. The headphones were still blaring when you moved to set them over your ears, scrambling back up before he could get you back for it.

“So long, Gray - hey!” He yanked you right back on top of him before you could make your grand exit, laughing his ass off while you attempted to scowl and push your hair out of your face. “Seriously? You couldn’t just let me have this one?” 

“Nope,” he answered with a cheeky grin, hands still resting against your hips as he tugged you forward into a kiss. You couldn’t try to stay mad at him after that, and you knew he knew that as well as you did. “But maybe next time, babe. Y’know, you really almost had me there for a sec.”

“I did have you,” you corrected with a grin yourself as you turned off your music, letting the headphones fall around your neck. “I totally had you, you just got lucky right now.” 

“Oh yeah? Is that what you really think?” 

“Yes.”

“Then you’re right, you did have me,” he admitted, causing you to laugh again. “Hey, I can admit defeat! I’m a great sport like that.” 

“Sure you are.” 

“I am!” He rested one arm behind his head, making himself a little more comfortable as he looked up at you again. “And how about that date night tomorrow? If you’re still listening to me, that is-”

“I am listening,” you insisted with a groan, eliciting a grin from him. “And sure. I guess I could hang out with you since I don’t have anything else to do-”

“Else to do - like what? Ignoring your other boyfriends?”

“Exactly.” He was laughing again when he pulled you in for another kiss.

“Got it, thanks for making room for me in your oh-so busy schedule. Tomorrow it is.” You hummed in response, brushing his hair out of his face as you looked back at him with a slight smile.

 “It’s a date.” 

tag list: @cipheress-to-k-pop 

if you’d like to be added to my taglist, just send me a message and i’ll keep you posted!

[palestinianliberator]

To be Palestinian is exhausting

You will not find a single Palestinian who hasn’t had to endure all of the following and more:

Constantly having to prove our existence

[This is going to be a tremendously long post, but I implore you to read through what you can]

Constantly having to educate everyone around us on our history and people while we continue to be slaughtered

Constantly having to combat Israeli propaganda and dehumanization campaigns against us

Constantly having to combat liberal propaganda from those who simply cannot understand the pain and damage they are doing

Constantly having to defend ourselves from the overwhelming forces that stand in our way, from the Israeli forces to the global institutions that help support it to the structures in the US that mean that any Palestinian who dares speak out risk both their lives and livelihood

Constantly in fear of whether or not you’ll end up on another “list” as a result of daring to speak out

Constantly having to do it all again as soon as we’re back on the news

Constantly having to answer for all other Palestinians in a way that nobody else is expected to

Constantly being seen as the “crazy one” when trying to share your narrative, having to defend against an endless barrage of accusations of antisemitism

Constantly being put into situations by bad-faith actors who attempt to engage in “debate” or “discussion” or “dialogue” with talking points that demean and duhamanize you, all while being expected to maintain a smile and cool composure while someone literally debates to your face your own existence or how “actually it’s YOUR people’s fault you’re being slaughtered! Israel isn’t the bad guy here!”

Constantly being forced to choose between engaging in bad-faith debates framed in a way to make you look like the unreasonable bad guy while the person implicitly defending your ethnic cleansing is made to look like the “rational good guy” or looking after your own mental health, knowing that even refusing these “invitations” is itself a mark against you and your people

Constantly being told that you’re too “biased”, too “close”, too “emotional” about the literal slaughter of your people to be seen as a valid source, while Israelis and complete outsiders are given all the space they want to speak for us endlessly

Constantly seeing people being actively mislead and wondering if you have the capacity to reach out to them and attempt to share your narrative with them, knowing that if you don’t, they’re going to go on to propagate the same lies justifying your ethnic cleansing

Constantly having to combat GENUINE censorship throughout the media, social media, and society itself. It’s a fact proven by former Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Youtube employees that Palestinian voices have their reach censored in a way no one else does, which is why it’s so important to amplify and actively share Palestinian voices rather than just liking or indicating support

Constantly being told you don’t know your own history by people who’ve educated themselves on Youtube and Wikipedia despite having lived the reality yourself and dedicating your entire life to studying every single aspect of it

Constantly seeing those who have the courage to stand alongside you being shut down with accusations of antisemitism and seeing them lose their courage to stand by you out of fear of their own image and livelihood and having to rush to their defense as well

Constantly having to see photos of your people, sometimes even people you know, maimed, injured, murdered, or burned to ash by Israeli aggression but knowing you have a duty to share what’s happening and must stomach the images to show the world the true extent of the suffering we endure

Constantly having to worry not just for your own safety, but the safety of your family and loved ones who can be punished or targeted because of things you yourself say

Constantly wondering who you can actually trust, from new friends and acquaintances to professors to even other Palestinians because we’ve been so heavily infiltrated by Israeli intelligence looking to blackmail Palestinians using anything from their sexual orientation or even made up “evidence” meant to ruin their lives

Constantly having your heart sink every notification you get wondering if it’s news that a loved one has been killed

Constantly seeing the corpses of loved ones shared on social media and reliving the trauma all over again, yet again knowing that you WANT the world to see what’s happening

Constantly seeing the effects this has on your own family and feeling helpless to do anything

Constantly on alert for the FBI at your door as they often “visit” Palestinians who dare speak out, myself included on numerous occasions 

Constantly wondering if your advocacy for your people is going to result in the loss of your job, scholarship, license

Constantly being asked to “humanize” and “feel for” those who live their lives day in day out completely unfazed by your suffering despite living in a society that couldn’t even FUNCTION without our subjugation

Constantly being told “don’t blame regular Israelis, blame the government!!” as if the state itself wasn’t founded on our ethnic cleansing, as if it isn’t “normal Israelis” who make up the entirety of the Israeli Military and have actively brutalized you and your people

Seeing allies you fought for suddenly SILENT when it’s their time to speak up

Studying on a US campus where those SAME SOLDIERS WHO ENGAGED IN YOUR PERSECUTION AND ACTIVELY SERVED AS THE ENFORCERS OF YOUR OCCUPATION then re-enact the trauma against you and you’re meant to simply ignore the fact that THEY ARE THE SAME PEOPLE WHO MURDERED YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY, and not being allowed to even be ANGRY at that

Trying to navigate this half-life in the diaspora where it’s a struggle to connect with other Palestinians given the distance between us and yet not being able to connect with anyone around because, again, they simply can’t understand

Constantly being expected to simply give up your time to those who demand you answer them and debate your existence and narrative with them, who them take you blocking them for your own mental health as a “victory” to be lorded over you when you simply can’t take it anymore

Constantly having to EXPLAIN all of this because nobody but other Palestinians can truly understand just how pervasive, overwhelming, and incapacitating this unique form of exhaustion is

Constantly seeing your erasure and ethnic cleansing defended all over the media, all over social media, throughout your academic career, while those ENGAGED in your ethnic cleansing have the audacity to claim that the media is biased against THEM

Constantly on guard with everything you say and write, knowing that unlike those promoting our ethnic cleansing, we don’t have the luxury of making mistakes or getting lazy in our writing and advocacy. One mistaken source, mistaken information, being imperfect is enough to discredit your voice entirely

The crippling obligation you have to share the narrative of your people, knowing that so many people will view you as the spokesperson of your entire people, knowing how unfair it is, but also knowing that if you DON’T speak out, nobody will on your behalf, and even the most well-intentioned, involved allies can simply never understand how it all truly feels

Seeing the entire world stand by and do absolutely nothing while your people are slaughtered time and time again

Seeing your history misconstrued by people implicitly defending your ethnic cleansing and settler-colonialism

Knowing that our parents have been through this and more, seeing them have to go through this yet again while still being forced to go about their daily lives and given no time to mourn or recover

Not being able to even share our culture without being attacked for it

Knowing that so many of your friends and family won’t ever be able to return to their homeland while foreigners from around the globe are flown into Israel free because it’s their “birthright”

A “birthright” denied to even my own parents, born in Jerusalem yet unable to enter it

Having even self-proclaimed “allies” question Palestinian resistance, policing our tone, never /really/ understanding our pain and anger and how they themselves contribute to it

Screaming from the moment you can about what’s happening to us, desperately trying to get people to CARE, and having it often fall on deaf ears

Knowing that if you’re not the source of information for those genuinely seeking to learn, they may find themselves mislead by sources that claim to be fair and balanced while imprinting subtle lies about Palestine and Palestinians on those they engage with

Not even being able to find the energy and ability to respond to genuine messages of love and support, which are greatly appreciated, and feeling bad about it because you don’t want to seem like you’re not genuinely happy to hear it

Feeling a sense of overwhelming exhaustion in times like this while at the same time being unable to sleep

Seeing the effect all of this has had on your people, knowing your people have among the highest rates of depression on the planet and yet we’re all suffering together with no way to ease the pain

Being constantly exposed to the ways in which your people are erased and questioning if you have the energy or sanity left to deconstruct such aggression to help outsiders understand the severity of it all

Seeing allies suddenly call for “peace” when Palestinians are finally fed up enough to rise up and fight back against an overwhelming military force

I could go on, but in case you it’s not already clear, I’m tired and exhausted

Always wondering if any of this is even worth it when the world has ignored your slaughter and ethnic cleansing for nearly 8 decades, knowing that nobody is about to step in to help now.

Constantly wondering if any of this is even worth it, and then feeling inspired by fellow Palestinians, our resilience, the fact that despite ALL of this and more, we continue to fight.

Despite all of this, I would never even consider or entertain the thought of being born as anything other than Palestinian

[angel-anoetic]

What if you rewrote your last post, but this time it didn’t work, which leads to Skeppy and Bad fighting because Bad still tries to go back to the egg?

Alright, alright, I was not too sure where to start from this, so the last conversation between reader and Bad will be added, but with the alternate ending. Thanks so much for your request!!

SkepHalo x gn!Reader - Let Me Go

Genre: /rom, angst

Warnings: Injury, fighting

original ending

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Red Banquet. Of course, it had to happen tonight. You had done your absolute best to keep everyone away. But you could only do so much. It was the only way. Now you were trying to convince Bad to spend just a few more hours with you. Your final hours.

"C'mon just a quick walk. I promise we'll be back before the Banquet starts."

"Fine."

Yes, finally. Skeppy had been missing for the last few days so you took full advantage of Bad and your alone time, making sure to spend as much as time with him, whether it was a conversation over coffee or a late-night walk around the SMP.

You took his hand, making sure to walk a little slower today, pointing out things you had never really noticed before, and soaking in the sun.

"Do you remember the first time we met?" You looked to him.

He smiled. "Of course I do silly. Me and Skeppy were out mining that day. Somehow, we ended up in the nether and found you casually walking around in the lava, playing with a strider. I think that was the moment we both knew we had to be your friend at the least. I don't think we really thought we would be here though."

As you walked up the path to your home Bad stopped and turned to you, grabbing your hands gently in his.

"Y/N...I want you to know, I really am sorry for the way things have been. I never meant for things to go this far and I really wanted this for us. The three of us. I hope one day you'll be able to forgive me, and we'll be able to pretend like this never happened."

He smiled to you, and you to him.

"I know. Trust me, this will be all over soon." He looked at you a bit puzzled but shrugged it off as you entered.

Once you were both set, ready, and dressed up you were off. Puffy knew what was meant to happen tonight. She swore up and down she would do her best to help the good prevail, regardless of whatever was to happen.

The dinner began, with you sitting, anxious but ready. Puffy kept side-eyeing you, her nerves just as evident.

"The Egg requires a sacrifice. One that will suffice its hunger for a time. Thankfully we have a room of guests."

Now. It had to happen now.

You looked at Puffy, giving her the signal. She motioned to Sam and Foolish.

You stood up, to Bad's surprise.

"Me. I want to be the sacrifice." His face changed. The color came back to him as he came to.

"What? No-no. This wasn't for you my love. We're going to rule together-"

Sam and Foolish grabbed Bad, holding him as tight as they could. He looked around as it dawned on him what was happening. The Egg would fall today.

You walked over, the fire slowly becoming more vibrant. You reached out to him, planting a small kiss on his cheek.

"This is for the best my love. Until we meet again. I hope one day you'll be able to forgive me."

You turned, the tears not even having time to leave your eyes. You ignored the pleas of Bad, begging for Foolish and Sam to let him go and his calls to you, to turn around, to reconsider.

You blocked it out, letting the heat flow from within you out. You gathered what you could, and then some. Would this hurt? You weren't sure. Would this even work? The chances were 50/50. But if there was even a slim chance, you needed to take it.

You thought of the bad, the worst memories you could pull. You focused on the emotions, the feelings of what the Egg had put you through, what it had put those you loved the most through. That was your motivation. That was the reason your power, the fire, grew until you could feel your skin burning.

You stood on the top of the Egg, then waited. Waited until the fire was too much for even yourself. The Egg began cracking under you, screeching as everything around it caught on fire.

"We have to go. Now!" Puffy screamed. Everyone began filing out of the room. Foolish and Sam struggled as Bad fought against their restraint.

"Bad," Puffy crouched in front of him "this is not your fault. They wanted to do this themselves. They wouldn't want you here to see this."

He sobbed as he continued to fight. He was too late. They dragged him out of the room as the walls surrounding them began to topple down.

You had long lost feeling, only letting the fire consume everything around you. You fell to your knees, unrelenting.

Goodbye, my love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your eyes tried to open, but even that was too much effort for you. You could hardly feel your skin. Your mind refused to feel anything.

"I don't know...could be a while."

Sam?

"Please just tell me they'll be okay. Please."

Skeppy.

You let out a small groan. Your eyes finally began to push open.

"Y/N!" Skeppy nearly grabbed at your hand before remembering the aches and pain Sam told him you might experience. "H-hey, how are you feeling?"

"Crappy." You both laughed.

"Language." You heard the small mutter from the doorway. Skeppy and you turned to see Bad, tears staining his face, silently holding himself.

"Bad..." You patted the bed next to you, an invitation he accepted gladly.

He looked at you, the pain and regret visible in his eyes.

"Y/N, I am...I'm so sorry." He let out a small sob, covering his face, "I never, I never would have let you do that if you had told me-" You grabbed his hand, stopping him in his tracks.

"It's okay. I'm here now. That's all that matters. But please, tell me, did it work? Is it gone?" Skeppy shook his head, gently taking your hand.

"I'm sorry Y/N, you did some pretty decent damage, but it's still here."

You looked at the ceiling. Damn it. All that mattered right now was that both of your boys were here with you, regardless of how you had ended up here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The first few days had been great. Skeppy and Bad refused to let you do anything on your own, despite your protests. You finally drew the line when they offered to sleep on the floor so you could have the bed to yourself. Bad got up every morning to make you breakfast and took care of you during the day. Sometimes Skeppy would stay home and you would all enjoy a movie.

Until about two weeks ago. You weren't sure if it had been you or Skeppy who noticed first, but nonetheless Bad's absence in the late hours of the nice. He would be back in bed by the morning, but soon he would leave earlier and earlier in the evening.

You were laying in bed, trying to stop a headache from taking over when you heard the door open quietly. Skeppy stood up from where he was standing and crossed his arms.

"Where were you?" He asked a disheveled-looking Bad.

"Nowhere important. How are they?"

Skeppy scoffed, "Just admit it. I already know. But I want to hear you say it. They're doing just fine actually, just a slight headache."

"Skeppy, I don't know what you could possibly mean. I was just enjoying the server for once."

"Stop lying to me. Just say it so I don't have to push it out of you."

Bad groaned and made his way to the kitchen, Skeppy followed, leaving you on the couch.

"I can't believe you sometimes. Y/N is still on bed rest because of what they did for you, for us, and you have the audacity to go back to the Egg!"

Bad stopped and looked to Skeppy. "How-It doesn't matter. Because I'm still my own person Skeppy, I can make my own decisions."

"Oh yeah, my bad, I forgot the world just revolves around you. What about me? What about them?!"

The fight was starting to get to you, pushing your headache to a worse state.

"Skeppy, it's not like that. You know it's not like that. This wouldn't even be a problem if you didn't make it one. Stop being so dramatic."

"I'm being dramatic? Y/N almost died trying to destroy that thing so that we could be free, even if it was without them. And you're here, turning into the same person you were months ago. Do you even listen to yourself?"

"Leave me alone! Let me live. I know what they did, but I also know what the Egg could do for us. The three of us!"

"Skeppy..." You called out softly.

He quickly rushed to you, feeling your forehead, grabbing a wet towel from before. "It's okay, you're okay, I'm sorry for all the screaming darling."

Skeppy waited until you closed your eyes, falling into a light sleep. He refused to look at Bad, studying your face.

"You won't do this to us again. I won't let you. I think I can trust you enough to make the right choice because I know that the Bad that I and Y/N fell in love with is still in there."

Bad stayed silent for a moment.

"I'm going to go before I say something I'll regret."

Bad slammed the door and was off. Skeppy could feel the tears welling in his eyes, but held them back, stroking your face softly.

[mypoisonedvine]

zemo arranged marriage where you always had a crush on him. he never paid you any attention and was always out of reach, so much more mature and older. you hear a rumor he's planning on ending the engagement, crushed you ask for just one night together so you'll at least the memories of him

so let’s not talk about how I wrote this advance and then accidentally posted it early and then had to delete it and was about to ask you to send the prompt again when I realized you sent it last week so I’m actually answering last week’s lmao

anyways this is super angsty and amazingly turned out sfw somehow

In typical fashion, you didn’t realize how desperately you loved him until you realized you could never have him.

Now that you were sobbing in the bedroom that you intended to share with him someday, you wondered how you ever could’ve thought you were lucky to be promised to him.  You were even younger and more naïve then, thinking that he could return your affections; but he was a man and you were just a girl.  Men had better things to worry about.

You’d been engaged nearly eight months now and you had barely had a conversation with your fiancé.  It made you cringe now to remember how desperate you’d been for his attention, juvenile in your repeated attempts to gain his favor.  It always backfired and he ended up further away than ever.

You gasped and jumped up when you heard the door open; he was standing there, staring at you, looking... impossible to read, as always.

“I didn’t realize you were in here,” he stated plainly.

“Well, I won’t be much longer,” you promised, defiantly wiping your tears and standing up from the bed.  “I’m going to make it easier for you, and just leave now.”

He tilted his head and you rolled your eyes.  “I hate when you do that.  Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about.”

“I wish I did,” he defended.  “Have you been crying?”

“I heard you’re going to break it off,” you finally explained, and he sighed.

“Oh.”

You stormed to the dresser where you found your old luggage.  “I was just getting this, so I could pack my things from the guest room.”

It still killed you that you’d been sleeping alone in the guest room this whole time.

“I’d prefer that you didn’t leave like this,” he weakly protested, and when you tried to step past him to go back to your room, he blocked the door with his arm.

“Let me out,” you frowned.

“Not yet,” he shook his head.  “Clearly you have more to say.  I want you to say your piece before you go.”

“I don’t have anything to say to you.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

Something about the way he said it-- stern but patient, as collected as ever-- just made you fucking lose it.  How dare he be so calm as he threw you away?  How dare he ask you for anything?

You roughly shoved him in the chest, knocking him back into the hallway where you cornered him, tossing your bag aside.  “You want my piece?  Is that it?  After eight months of hell, you want to hear what I have to say?  Whatever happened to ‘stay quiet and we shouldn’t bother each other’?  What about ‘I don’t need your opinion and I have no desire for it’?  Do you remember saying those things to me?”

He nodded, “I remember.”

“For the better part of a year I had so much to say to you and no opportunity.  I wanted to tell you that I loved you, that I loved you before we were even engaged and that I’ve never loved anyone else.  I wanted to tell you how I longed for you, how much it killed me to sleep alone, how the only thing worse than imagining you alone, too, was imagining that you had someone else and that was why you kept me so far away.  I wanted to tell you that I thought myself so lucky to be your betrothed, that I dreamed of nothing more than to be your wife and that I couldn’t wait to have a family with you-- to be a family with you.”

Even though you’d been crying all day already, somehow these tears hurt the most.

“You wouldn’t even let me tell you ‘good morning.’  You’re kinder to the house staff.  Maybe that’s the worst thing... that you’re not a cruel man at all, not to anyone else, it’s just me that you hate so much.  You wouldn’t even let me tell you that I missed you.  And now... now you have the audacity to ask me what I want to say to you?!”

He looked back at you, not exactly as shocked or hurt or angry as you would’ve hoped... yes, a little stunned, but still so painfully calm.  Even now, he couldn’t give you the satisfaction of a reaction.  He just stood there, stoic and silent, like he was waiting for you to do something.  You’d never been so angry, so hurt, all at once.

“I only have one thing to say to you, Helmut,” you finished coldly.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Guess.”

He thought for a moment.  “You’re going to tell me to go fuck myself, I presume.”

You scoffed.  “Yeah, something like that.”

As you started to turn and walk down the hall in search of your bedroom to pack, his voice stopped you.  “There isn’t anyone else,” he told you.  “I slept alone.”

You knew you shouldn’t turn back, but you couldn’t help yourself.  For once he looked a little affected by it all, his expression softer and his hair having fallen out of its style and down into his face slightly.

“I longed for you, too,” he admitted, making your breath catch in your throat, “I should’ve told you, but if you turned me away I’d never recover from the heartbreak.  I thought maybe I could keep you here just to look at you, even if I couldn’t touch you or hold you... but it was too hard.  That’s why I wanted to end the engagement, to give you a chance to be with someone who could care for you like you deserved.”

His cowardice should’ve angered you and yet you began to calm down, especially as he stepped closer.  His hand reached for your arm, just the gentlest touch and it still made your heart skip.  

“I’ve been so cruel to you.  I hope if you leave now, you won’t hate me forever,” he breathed.  “Because I think I’ll love you all my life.”

Before you could stop yourself, you stood up on your toes and pulled him into a kiss, sudden and perhaps a little desperate, but relatively conservative considering how much more you really wanted.  He kissed you back, gently, just for a moment, as you felt his hands rest on your waist.

But then he pulled back and it was all over before it really began.  You didn’t open your eyes at first, afraid to see him for the last time.  “Just one night,” you whispered under your breath.

“Hm?” he asked, and you found the courage to blink your eyes open.

“Just one night,” you requested again, “to remember you by.  I’ve never wanted anyone else.”

He sighed and kissed you again, quickly, before shaking his head.  “I can’t give you that.”

Well, he’d managed to do it; he’d managed to break your heart a thousand times each day and get one twist of the knife in before he sent you away.

“I can’t just have one night,” he continued.  “If you let me hold you, I’ll never let you go.”

You breathed out shakily.  “Is that a promise?”

He smiled and trailed his fingers over yours, resting his touch on the diamond on your ring finger, the one he gave you when it all began.  “You were already promised to me.  I think it’s only fair I finally keep up on my end of the deal.”

And this time when he kissed you, it didn’t feel like a goodbye.  It felt like the beginning you’d been waiting all this time for, it felt like the chance to say everything you never did before.  And instead of one last night, you got everything you ever wished for.

[lveclouds]

↬ break my heart (what’s wrong with secretary kim au)

↬ pairing/characters: vice chairman knj x secretary reader x ceo jungkook (the other members will also make appearances), some ocs

↬ genre: fluff, heavy angst, enemies to lovers, slow burn (slower than flash the sloth from zootopia), kdrama au, mutual pining, strong denial of feelings from both joon and reader, love triangle (i’m so sorry bc it’s going to be very messy)

↬  tw: mentions of childhood trauma (as seen in the show), heavy swearing, joon is kind of a jerk in this fic oops-  and there may or may not be a love triangle in this, and oc drinks with two of the members (slight alcohol content) , mild physical violence (oops) , and the use of the word w**** but no nsfw content is involved, mentions of child neglect, mentions of depression (very brief), mentions of death in the family (very brief) , dysfunctional family (namjoon’s parents are jerks and so is his brother), mentions of a toxic relationship)

 ↬ disclaimer: i do not own the original story! all rights go to the original creator, jung kyung yoon and the writers at tvn + jimin , taehyung and jungkook are around the same age and hoseok and tae live together

 ↬ rating: m, ec21 (see trigger warnings)

↬ wc: 47k (idek how my one braincell managed to write this much)

 ↬ summary: “why would you care if i’m struggling or not?! you’re nothing but a narcissistic asshole who cares only about himself! i do everything you request of me, even if i’m near passing out from exhaustion, even if i have to lose sleep because of a meeting!” you hissed, fighting back frustrated and angry tears. namjoon had the audacity and the nerve to look appalled. “what? surprised that i’m not confessing my love to you?” you sneered. “do you really think that?” think what?” “that i don’t care about you? that you’re just my secretary and nothing more?” his voice was surprisingly soft and gentle, sad even, but you refused to buy into his act. “yes, yes, i do.” namjoon’s light brown eyes glimmered with unshed tears. “then maybe you should just leave, if you really hate me that much.”

 ↬note: hi my loves, so this is officially the LONGEST fic i’ve ever written. when i was first drafting it, i did not plan on making it this lengthy, it just kind of happened? the word count kept increasing every time i worked on it lmao anyways i hope you all enjoy it regardless! + i’m sorry that this took a million years for me to post, school’s been a pain and then i had a small case of writers’ block:(( also, shoutout to my friends at bangtan university, heartsforbts, bangtan inn, etc. i love you all so so so so so so so much and thank you all so much for encouraging me to write this monster of a fic:’) + thank you to my irl friend for all the boosts of serotonin, for blasting kpop with me and for sending me random videos throughout my day, (this fic is dedicated to you, ilysm!!) + also this fic doesn’t exactly follow the original plot of the drama, so things might turn out different ;) + this fic has taken me a million years to write lmao and i’m thinking of writing a sequel to spare y’all the reading lmao + this is the first fic in my bangtan and kdramas series!! 

  p.s. this fic does have a playlist, and you can listen to it here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1H30ku0nQPdiraPgaG2Unp?si=4cd27a68505a4e5a (p.s. thank you to @kithtaehyung​,  @sugakookcafe​, and @ddaechwita​ for sending me songs ily angels sm<3) also this fic may or may not have references to other dramas hehe <3

   march 15th, 2019

 you loathed parties, and yet, here you were, standing amidst a sea of people in a massive banquet hall, already feeling drained. light chatter and soft laughter filled the air, and soft pop music was playing. you felt extremely uncomfortable in the long rose-pink dress that was a loan from your older sister, and the pearl white heels you were wearing were making your feet ache. you had spent hours on your makeup and hair to look presentable, but after stepping inside the banquet hall, it became clear to you that your efforts were only in vain. you sighed, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, taking a light sip of your second glass of champagne, the taste of crisp apple and sugar lingering in your mouth.

  this social event, or banquet, as the media called it, was to celebrate the partnership of kim holdings, the most prestigious business in seoul with a prominent company in spain. but in hindsight, it was just an excuse for seoul’s rich and famous to mingle. and while most would kill to attend one of these exclusive events, you would do anything to stay away from them. attending a party with the rich and famous wasn’t all glitz and glamour. it meant dealing with the countless rumors and whispers, about what family you came from, what your family did for a living, and vice versa. you were no stranger to such things, for the moment you started working for one of the most famous figures in seoul, kim namjoon, rumors surrounded you.

 “is she the vice chairman’s girlfriend?”

“look at her, she looks like she’s pretending to be someone she’s not, poor girl.”

“she’s probably going to be fired soon.”

 you paid them no attention, for you knew none of them were true, but they did sting sometimes. according to various news outlets, namjoon was infamous for changing secretaries, which was why it was such a shock that you had become a permanent presence by his side for nine years. those nine years were difficult and there had been times where you felt like giving up, but because you didn’t want to disappoint anyone, you worked your ass off to get to where you were now.

  the air inside the hall was a bit stifling and smelled strongly of perfume and men’s cologne, and you could already feel a headache coming on. you heard soft footsteps approaching you, and you turned to address them, a plethora of pleasantries forming in your brain. but upon seeing their face, you immediately relaxed, feeling the tension in your shoulders loosen, just a bit. “jungkook, it’s nice to see you!” said male grinned, a friendly smile gracing his handsome features. “it’s nice to see you as well. how are you?” “i’ve been better, work’s been keeping me busy.” “hope namjoon’s not overworking you.” you scoffed. “when does he not, honestly?” jungkook winced slightly. “i’m sorry.” you waved off his apology. “i’ll live, anyways, enough about me. how are things?” “the company’s doing well, and-” “no, i mean, how are things with jieun?” the smile on his face fell slightly. “we broke up.” “oh, i’m so sorry, i shouldn’t have asked.” you apologized. jungkook shook his head. “it’s okay, you didn’t know.” “why did you end things, if you don’t mind me asking?” a sad smile tugged at jungkook’s lips. “she decided we’d be better off as friends, and honestly, she’s probably right. we were having some problems anyway. besides, i can now focus more on work.”

  jungkook was one of the youngest people to enter business and to have singlehandedly built his own establishment from the ground-up. not only that, but he was as humble and gracious as the media portrayed him to be. “where’s jimin?” park jimin was his hard-working and often clumsy secretary, who was usually by jungkook’s side. “i let him take the day off, he’s been overworking himself too much lately. it took some convincing, though.” you laughed softly. “i bet it did.” jimin was also notorious for being extremely stubborn and would’ve refused to take even a single day off, even if he was near exhaustion.

  “how’s your love life?” you scoffed. “non-existent.” “oh, come on, you mean to tell me no one has caught your eye yet?” you shrugged. with constantly having to fulfill namjoon’s every request, you hadn’t had time to start dating, nor had you really given it any thought.

 “i don’t have time, i’m practically married to my job at this point.” you sighed, taking another light sip of champagne. “i’m thinking about quitting.” jungkook’s chocolate brown eyes widened at that. “what?” “work’s been a pain in the ass lately, and honestly, i’ve been enjoying it less and less these days.” “that bad?” you nodded. “he’s an asshole for overworking you all these years.” “yeah, well, i kind of signed up for it when i became his secretary.” you mumbled.

  “well, you know, if you wanted, you could always come work for me. there’s always an open space for you.” you shot jungkook a grateful smile. “thanks kook, maybe i’ll consider your offer.” “well, if you do, just say the word and the job is yours.” “are you threatening to take my secretary away from me, jeon?” an all too-familiar voice said from behind him, tone void of any emotion. you fought the urge to roll your eyes as namjoon walked up beside jungkook, his tall and lithe figure towering over the younger, light brown eyes cold and unforgiving. “of course not, sir, i was simply talking with miss y/n, there was no threatening of any kind.”

 namjoon said nothing, only raised an eyebrow in question. then, he turned to you, expression unreadable as always. “let’s go.” you bid jungkook goodbye with a small smile and followed after your boss, annoyance coursing through you.

  the silence in the limousine was stifling, and you shifted uncomfortably in your seat. “something on your mind?” namjoon asked. “yes, i actually meant to bring this up earlier, but never got the chance.” he gestured for you to elaborate. “ah, well, i was thinking of quitting. it’s been an honor to work as your secretary, but since i’m so busy, i don’t have time for anything.” “and what would that be?” “i want to date, get married, have kids one day, and i can’t do that if i have a job that requires me to be away from home for long periods of time. i can’t go on business trips for three weeks if i have kids, i have to be home to take care of them.”

  the tension in the air thickened like fog, and after a long pause, namjoon’s gaze slid towards you, lips pursed tightly. “you want to quit?” you nodded, subtly wiping your sweaty palms on your dress. “i mean, i’ve been working for you for nine years, surely you’re sick of me. so, i think it’s time you start looking for a new secretary, my replacement, i mean.” namjoon didn’t say a word the entire ride back to his house, and as the chauffeur pulled out of his driveway, you couldn’t help but feel as if things were never going to be the same again.

   (a month later)

 it’d been nearly a month since that awkward talk in the limousine, and namjoon hadn’t bothered to bring up the subject of you quitting. naturally, you still worked just as hard as you did when you first got hired, making sure that his schedule was organized, and fulfilled every request namjoon had, even if it meant running around downtown seoul like a madwoman, clutching two cups of coffee and a box of the expensive pastries he liked. your feet always ached afterwards, but you couldn’t complain, after all, it was your job, and you could at least prove to him that you were capable.

  you sighed, ignoring the painful ache in your neck from staring at the computer all day, sending out emails to other companies, setting up appointments and meetings for the coming months. “are you okay?” jung hoseok, the chief section head asked, worry creasing his brow. “i’m fine, just exhausted.” hoseok frowned, the expression unusual for his usual sunny demeanor, but didn’t press further. “well, let me know if you need anything.” you shot him a grateful look, which he returned with a bright smile, and waved goodbye to you as he disappeared around the corner.

ignoring the now dull ache in your neck, you typed furiously on the pristine white keyboard in front of you, determined to finish the email you’d been drafting to the ceo of a well-known company in france for hours now.

   namjoon leaned back against his gray office chair, letting out a tired sigh. he’d been in and out of meetings all day, and he was sure he could’ve gotten carpal tunnel from typing for nearly six hours, sending a stern email to an incompetent employee. for the first time in years, namjoon let his mind wander, exhaustion taking over his will to continue work.

  namjoon thought of the talk he had had with you in the limousine a month ago, where you had explained to him that work was getting in the way of you having a “normal” life, and that you were wanting to quit. he hadn’t known what to do or how to react when you’d suddenly blurted it out to him, out of nowhere. and as a result, namjoon had barely gotten any sleep that same night, wondering what had made you decide to stop working for him.

  you hadn’t mentioned anything besides the fact that you simply wanted to date and get married, and despite his intelligence, namjoon couldn’t figure out if there was something you were hiding from him. “i think it’s time you start looking for a new secretary, my replacement, i mean.” as soon as those words left your mouth, namjoon was rendered speechless. you had worked alongside for so long that he hadn’t even considered the prospect of hiring a new secretary. 

how am i supposed to find a replacement on such short notice? she’s the most competent secretary i’ve ever had, and she has the nerve to suggest that she leaves all because she wants to date? “ridiculous.” namjoon mumbled, sorting through the thick file of papers on his desk, scanning them carefully, pushing away the thought of you leaving from his mind.

   some thirty minutes later, there was a soft but firm knock on his door. “come in.” he called, not bothering to look up from the report the resources team had sent his way. namjoon heard the all too- familiar click of heels on the marble tiled floor, and immediately knew who it was.

 “vice chairman, you have an appointment regarding the acquisition of the department store at three. and here are the files you requested about the company in madrid.” you said, placing a thick manila folder on his desk. “do you need anything else?” namjoon shook his head, and you gave him a small smile, bowing slightly before turning to leave the room.

  “would you accompany me to the appointment?” surprise flashed across your face, but it was brief, and namjoon barely caught before you recovered and smiled politely, nodding. “of course, sir.” and with that, you turned and walked out of his office, heels clicking with each step.

  namjoon sighed, tossing the report he’d been reading to the side of his desk, pinching the bridge of his nose. it wasn’t even lunch, and he could already feel a migraine starting to form.

   “did the vice chairman scold you again? you look like you want to be anywhere but here.” taehyung asked, resting his chin on his hand, cerulean eyes glinting with amusement. you gave him a half-hearted glare, which made the former chuckle. taehyung was the head of the resources team, and was also in charge of ensuring that all the reports they made were accurate. “he’s making me go to the appointment with the department store.” “ah, seriously? he can’t just make someone else go with him, like his driver?” you sighed, arranging a loose pile of papers on your desk, stacking them neatly. “beats me. i would’ve said no, but he’d probably throw a fit or something.”

 taehyung laughed, running a hand through his thick, curly hair, which he’d started to grow out a bit more. “did you get a perm?” “yeah, hoseok hyung told me i look like a poodle.” “well, you’re a handsome poodle, at least.” taehyung rolled his eyes. “yeah, tell that to my mom, she also insulted me when i came home looking like this, she’s so cruel sometimes.” “i love your mom, and for the record, i think she’s just being honest.”

 taehyung gasped in mock disbelief. “y/n, how could you? i thought we were friends.” you bit back a laugh at how dramatic he was being. “i’m sorry tae, i didn’t mean to offend you.” he sniffed, pretending to wipe tears from his eyes. “you’re forgiven if you go out for drinks with hoseok hyung and i.” you sighed, knowing that if you went, you would be the one dragging their drunk asses home. “fine, but if you two drink too much, i’m leaving you and hoseok to rot on the curb.” taehyung pouted. “you’re so harsh, y/n.” “well, i wouldn’t be if you two weren’t such lightweights.” “we are not lightweights! we’re just carefree.” you laughed. “keep telling yourselves that.”

   the appointment was fairly boring, and you were sure you had zoned out during the entire thing, but no one seemed to notice, not even namjoon, who was usually very perceptive and observant. on the way back to the company, you noticed that namjoon kept rubbing at his temples, as if he had a headache. “everything alright, sir?” said male nodded. “just exhausted, it’s been a long day.” you hummed in agreement, avoiding his gaze and turning towards the window, city-goers and pedestrians blurs of color as the limousine glided down the street. the silence in the car was a bit uncomfortable, and you fought the urge to fidget, instead folding your hands neatly in your lap, trying to keep them from shaking.

 you had no idea why you were so anxious, for accompanying namjoon on his business meetings was a normal occurrence. maybe it was because the last conversation you had with him, it had ended quite abruptly, and namjoon hadn’t bothered to express his thoughts towards you wanting to leave. the silence stretched on for the rest of the way, and you fought the urge to talk, swallowing against the bile in your throat.

    “you look awful, was the appointment really that bad?” hoseok asked, concern furrowing his brow as he handed you a bottle of water, which you took with a grateful smile. “i don’t even remember half of it, i spaced out the entire time.” you mumbled, taking a another sip of water.

hoseok frowned. “are you sure you’re okay? if you’re not, taehyung and i can cover for you.” you shook your head. “i really appreciate that, but it’s not necessary. i’ll be fine, besides, i’ve gone through worse before.” hoseok didn’t look too convinced, but eventually just sighed and nodded. “okay, but if you change your mind, just tell me.” “besides, taehyung will probably start having a mental breakdown if he’s at work for too long.” hoseok scoffed. “please, he’s just trying to go home as early as possible. once he starts whining and moping about the same damn thing for the next thirty minutes, it’s over.”

  you chuckled, ignoring the painful throbbing in your head, and leaned back into the comfy leather of your office chair, closing your eyes. “y/n, seriously, i think you should take the rest of the day off.” “you know i can’t do that, hoseok.” “why not?” “do you honestly think the vice chairman will let me do that?” “he should! if he’s so intelligent and observant, he should be able to recognize when one of his employees is overworked, let alone his own personal secretary.” hoseok huffed, sitting down at his desk a few feet away.

  suddenly, the phone on your desk rang, shrill and loud, causing you to almost fall off your chair as you scrambled to answer it. “secretary y/l/n, you’re needed in my office.” “y-yes vice chairman, i’ll be right there.” you said, trying to keep your voice as even as possible.

 hoseok mouthed “good luck” as you nervously made your way to namjoon’s office, trying not to trip on your own feet in the process. you gave him a grateful smile over your shoulder. you took a deep breath before knocking softly on his office door. once you heard the authoritative “come in”, you braced yourself before stepping inside, making sure to close the door as gently as possible behind you.

  “you called, sir?” namjoon addressed you with a slight nod, and you exhaled softly before making your way over to his desk. “i wanted to talk to you about your behavior in the car earlier.” your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “i’m not sure what you mean, vice chairman. i told you, i was just exhausted.”  “why did you avoid eye contact then? did i do something to make you uncomfortable? was the drive unpleasant?” you shook your head. it’s nothing you did sir, i just didn’t get enough sleep the other night, so i am a bit exhausted. i apologize for the misunderstanding.” namjoon’s light brown eyes narrowed, as if he doubted that you were telling the truth, but merely pressed his lips together and nodded. “that’s all, then.”

  you inclined your head in thanks before speed-walking out of his office, not bothering to look back. hoseok looked up from his computer, worry evident on his face, and you managed a small smile, hoping it was reassuring enough to convince him that you alright, and slumped onto your office chair, feeling even more exhausted and defeated than before. “was it bad?” hoseok asked, voice hesitant and soft, as if he were afraid someone might overhear. you shook your head. “he asked me why i was acting so strange earlier.” hoseok’s brows furrowed in confusion. you sighed, explaining how you had purposefully avoided eye contact with namjoon, all because you had been reminded of the time when you tried to talk to him about quitting.

 hoseok’s hazel eyes went wide. “you were thinking of quitting? what’d he say?” “nothing at all, which is why i’m always on edge, i’m scared he’s going to bring up the subject again and then i’ll be forced into an awkward conversation with him. again.” hoseok gave you a sympathetic smile. “well, at least he hasn’t fired you yet?” “not helping,” you hissed. “sorry, i just don’t know what to tell you, you really put yourself in quite the situation, huh?”

 you groaned. “no need to remind me, i’m very much aware.” “what she’s trying to say is that she’s doomed.” taehyung supplied cheerfully from the other side of the room, earning a glare from hoseok. “tae, shut up and quit being a pain in the ass.” you shot hoseok a grateful look, and he returned it with a soft smile.

  though taeyhung had been joking, he was right, in a way. you would now have to avoid every possible circumstance and situation in which you would be forced into having a conversation with namjoon, and as his personal secretary, that would be nearly impossible.

 you sighed heavily, feeling your migraine worsen by the second, and buried your face into your hands. work was going to become even more awkward and unbearable, all because you had been so adamant in quitting all those months ago.

 you still stood by that, however, quietly filling out applications for other jobs when the vice chairman wasn’t looking over your shoulder, and keeping them in a locked drawer near your desk. the conversation you had with jungkook at the banquet still lingered at the back of your mind, and you kept wondering if deciding to work for his company would be the best decision for you. jungkook was kind, humble, unfailingly polite, and actually let his employees come and go as they pleased. 

you knew the work environment would be much better, but your heart always ached at the thought of leaving hoseok and taehyung behind, who were the only friends you had at the company, for they had never thought of you as someone who was trying to sleep with namjoon, unlike the rest of the assholes that occupied the six-story building that overlooked the entirety of seoul. you ignored the ache in your neck and the migraine pounding at your skull and set to work for what seemed like the millionth time that day, all an attempt to distract you.

  hoseok yawned softly as he stretched, feeling all the tired muscles in his body pop. “i’m ready for drinks, work has been a pain in my ass all day.” taehyung mumbled, gathering the stuff on his desk and shoving it into a worn leather bag. hoseok hummed his agreement, shrugging on his gray suit jacket and sliding his backpack over his shoulders.

  “y/n, are you ready to go?” “mn, i’ll meet you two there, i have some things to finish up for the vice chairman, so you two can go ahead.” taehyung huffed. “seriously? that asshole can’t give you one night to yourself?” you reached out and smacked the former on the arm. “could you be any louder? you’re going to get our asses fired.” taehyung scoffed. “please, i could easily find another job with a decent boss anywhere.” hoseok rolled his eyes, but he knew the former wasn’t lying. taehyung’s father, who happened to be the ceo of a major electronic company in daegu, wouldn’t have to do as much as lift a finger in order to find taehyung another job. 

he had many connections within seoul, all of whom were prominent figures, so hoseok doubted that taehyung would have a hard time searching for work elsewhere. hell, the man could even work in switzerland if he wanted, all he had to do as say the word.

 “damn these rich people.” you grumbled as you gathered the pile of documents on your desk, placing them in a navy blue folder. “i’ll just run these to him and then we can leave.” and before hoseok or taehyung could respond, you got up and swiftly walked to namjoon’s office, knocking firmly on the door.

 as soon as you disappeared inside the office, taehyung sighed. “what’s with you?” “i’m worried.” “about what?” “about y/n. she hasn’t been sleeping or eating properly, and i’m scared that the vice chairman is overworking her again.” hoseok frowned. “speaking of, have you seen her eat anything today?” “besides gulping down a water bottle in less than two seconds, no.”

 hoseok pinched the bridge of his nose. “this girl is driving me crazy.” that earned him a slight shove to shoulder, and he glared at taehyung. “what was that for?” “you’re still hung up on her, aren’t you?” hoseok felt his face flush. “s-shut up, i am very much over her.”

 during their freshman year of college, hoseok had had a huge crush on you, and had spent the remaining four years helplessly pining, too afraid to make a move. taehyung rolled his eyes. “you know you’re the worst liar in the world, right?”

 hoseok huffed. “i am not.” “yes you are, you always go into a state of total denial and your eyes get super wide.” he turned to see you walk out of namjoon’s office, an amused smile tugging at your lips. “whatever, at least i’m honest.” you laughed, quickly organizing the things on your desk before shrugging on a light beige sweater and sliding your purse over your shoulder.

“let’s go!” taehyung cheered as they walked out of the building, cerulean eyes near- glowing as the night greeted them, cool and inviting.

   minutes later, you were seated at a table towards the back of your favorite barbeque place, the smell of meat and alcohol filling your senses. you poured yourself another shot of soju and gulped it down, feeling it burn your throat. “ah, i’ve missed this.” taehyung declared, finishing off his own shot of soju, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “missed what? drowning our sorrows in alcohol?” hoseok mumbled as he turned over a piece of meat on the grill. the former rolled his eyes. “if that’s how you want to put it, then yes.” you huffed a laugh, reaching over to grab a pair of tongs, the metal cool against your skin, and went to help hoseok grill the meat.

  “y/n, what’s the deal with you and the vice chairman anyway? everyone in the office keeps whispering about you two, as if you’re sleeping with him or something.” out of the corner of your eye, you saw hoseok tense, grip tightening on the pair of tongs he was holding, and tore your gaze away after a few seconds. “nothing is going on between us. he’s the most arrogant and selfish person i’ve ever met, and hardly takes others’ feelings into consideration. his rotten personality ruins his good looks.” the corner of taehyung’s lips curled into a slight smirk.

  “oh, so you admit he’s attractive?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows. you felt your face flush scarlet, reaching over and smacking taehyung on the shoulder. “shut up.” you hissed, causing the aforementioned male to burst out laughing. “i hate you.” you mumbled, and felt hoseok pat your shoulder sympathetically as taehyung’s cerulean eyes danced with amusement. “aw, love you too, y/n.” “whatever.” you huffed, fighting the urge to smile.

  all the stress and fatigue from work seemed to fade into nothingness as you downed shot after shot of soju, not caring if you wouldn’t be able to remember anything the next day, nor the migraine that was inevitable, especially from the amount of alcohol you consumed.

  by the time you stumbled out of the bar, arms wrapped around hoseok and taehyung, feeling as if the world was spinning, the streets were filled with the usual late night pedestrians, loud laughter filling the air. luckily, you had been conscious and aware enough to text jungkook, who had become somewhat of an emergency contact everytime you went out drinking with your friends.

  sure enough, jungkook’s sleek black sports car pulled up at the curb some ten minutes later, looking almost invisible in the dark of the night. jungkook stepped out, casual in a black leather jacket, loose, white shirt, dark jeans, and chunky boots. his blond hair, which was usually styled to perfection, was messy and windswept, as if he’d ran around the block. jungkook greeted you with a small wave, a fond and exasperated smile tugging at his lips. “did you idiots really go out drinking? and on a work day, no less?” he scolded half-heartedly, chocolate brown eyes glittering with amusement. “no one likes a nag, jeon.” taehyung slurred, eyes nearly fluttering shut as he spoke, dark lashes brushing his sharp cheekbones.

  jungkook rolled his eyes, but made sure taehyung didn’t fall flat on his ass on the curb as he helped the very drunken male into his car after making sure that you and hoseok were in safely as well.

 you couldn’t help but sigh in content as jungkook lifted you into his arms with ease, the silver bracelets on his wrist clinking with the movement. “thanks for taking me home, i’m sorry you had to drag my drunk ass all the way back here.”

 you felt jungkook chuckle softly as he unlocked the door to your small apartment, gently nudging the door open with his foot. “it’s fine, i don’t mind. besides, it’s not as if i have anyone waiting for me at home, despite these looks of mine.” though his tone was light, you couldn’t help but frown, despite your drunken state. “you’ll find someone, kook. any girl would be lucky to have you, you’re one of the sweetest guys i know.” color crept onto jungkook’s cheeks, and a shy smile tugged at his lips. “thanks y/n, you’re the best.” you waved your hand dismissively. “no need to thank me, jungkook.” you muttered, and felt the world go dark as you finally passed out.

  you woke the next morning to a pounding headache and the loud ringing of your alarm, which made said headache even worse. groaning, you rolled over and scrambled to turn off your irritating alarm, burying your face in your pillow and exhaling softly. drinking with hoseok and taehyung entailed one of two things: getting insanely drunk and stumbling in the streets, or having to drag said males home. 

you didn’t get intoxicated often, as you were usually the designated driver, but when work got too stressful, you tended to let go completely and drown in alcohol. while it wasn’t the best decision, you never regretted it, as doing so made you forget about your asshole of a boss and the veritable mountain of paperwork you had to complete each day.

  sighing, you reluctantly got out of bed and trudged towards your bathroom in order to try and get rid of any evidence that you’d been out drinking the previous night. after a quick shower and changing into your usual clothes for work, which consisted of a gray pencil skirt, a white blouse, and a pair of simple nude heels, you headed to your small but cozy kitchen to make a cup of coffee before heading out.

  you sat at one of the many stools that occupied one side of your small kitchen island, sipping on your coffee, and letting your mind wander. last night had definitely helped take some of the stress you had been bottling up inside fade away, even if said feeling was temporary. the bitter smell of coffee invaded your senses, and you took one last sip before putting the mug in the sink. it’s going to be a long day, you thought as you headed upstairs to retrieve your bag.

   taehyung loosed a sigh as he typed furiously on the expensive desktop that took up a third of his desk, ignoring how his head pounded. “tired much?” hoseok quipped, scanning over a report at his own desk across from him, tone light and teasing. “shut up, you were drunk off your ass last night too, don’t act like you weren’t.” the older male scoffed. “i never said i wasn’t, i just recover faster than you.” “and yet you got tipsy after a single shot.” taehyung shot back. hoseok rolled his eyes, carefully putting the report he’d been reading off to the side. “you can insult me for my low alcohol tolerance later. you should focus, because if the vice chairman sees you slacking off, he’ll be pissed.”

  taehyung glared at hoseok, and said male just plastered on a cheerful smile. “have you seen y/n?” the smile on the older male’s face faded a bit. “no, why?” taehyung shrugged. “no reason, i was just wondering if she got home safe.” “i don’t know, i was too drunk to even think of texting her.” hoseok admitted, color staining his cheeks. “i mean, i wasn’t much better.” taehyung chuckled, turning his attention back to the report he’d been typing.

    minutes later, you walked in, looking surprisingly refreshed for someone who’d been stumbling in the streets hours prior. “hey losers.” you beamed, a teasing smile tugging at your lips. taehyung and hoseok merely glared in response, which managed to get a soft, fond laugh out of you. “hungover much?” “my head’s been killing me all morning.” taehyung whined, rubbing at his temples. “felt a little dizzy when i woke up, but that’s about it. i guess i didn’t drink as much as i thought. you?” hoseok asked, sifting through a pile of papers.

  you hummed thoughtfully. “had a little bit of a headache, but i guess it’s worn off.” suddenly, taehyung and hoseok shot up immediately, bowing their heads. “what’s going-?” “good morning.” you froze. shit, you thought as you stood up, trying not to trip on your feet as you did, inclining your head in greeting. namjoon’s handsome face was expressionless and cold as usual, and he only nodded in acknowledgement as he walked to his office, shutting the door firly behind him.

  as soon as he was gone, the three of you practically collapsed into your chairs, breathing sighs of relief. “i swear, that man is scarier than death itself.” taehyung shuddered. hoseok nodded his agreement. “tell me about it, he scares the shit out of me. i swear, my lifespan shortens everyday because of him.” you scoffed. “if that isn’t the understatement of the year.”

   namjoon had been trying to go over the final plans for the department store for the past hour, but he couldn’t seem to focus, no matter how hard he tried. to make matters worse, his head and neck were killing him. namjoon groaned and leaned back against his chair, the leather almost comforting against his back. he’d never had days where he couldn’t focus, especially if it regarded work, but they seemed to occur more often nowadays, and would rather give up his entire fortune than admit it.

  he sighed, gaze drifting to the massive window that occupied the entirety of the right wall, and felt himself frown. you were laughing about something that jung hoseok, the chief section head had said, eyes crinkling at the corners. he felt a slight surge of anger, and immediately scolded himself for it. stop getting angry at useless things, get it together. namjoon thought, clenching his jaw in frustration. he had never felt any sort of romantic attraction towards you, so why did the sight of you laughing with hoseok frustrate him so much?

   you were in the middle of drafting an email to the ceo of a well-renowed phone company in japan when your phone rang, cutting through the seemingly impenetrable silence of the office. cursing under your breath, you answered it, not bothering to check the caller id. “hello?” you said, trying to keep your voice as quiet as possible. “y/n?” “jungkook? what’s wrong?” he chuckled. “does there have to be some tragic event going on my life for me to contact you?” you felt your face flush scarlet. “no, i just- you don’t usually contact me.” “fair enough. anyways, are you free? after work, i mean.” “i think so, why?” “could you come by my house later?” he blurted, and you felt your eyes widen in surprise.

 “well, that was very abrupt.” you teased. “ah, sorry about that, i didn’t mean to startle you.” jungkook said, tone apologetic. “it’s okay, kook, i was just joking. sure, i’d love to, i’ll head over as soon as work is over.” “great, i’ll send you the address. see you later, y/n.” “see you.” you mumbled, ending the call and tossing your phone back into your bag.

  taehyung looked up from his computer, cerulean eyes bright with curiosity. “who was that?” “jungkook, he asked me to come by his house after work.” the corner of his lips curled up in a small smirk, and you felt color rush to your cheeks. “what?” you hissed. taehyung had the audacity to look smug. “nothing , nothing, just happy for you. I mean, you’re going to the house of one of the most eligible bachelors in seoul, that’s all.” “taehyung, how many times do i need to say that i’m not looking to date right now?” said male pouted. “y/n, you’ve been single for six years now! isn’t it about time that you start looking for love?” you sighed, running a hand through your hair. “tae, i know you mean well, but i just don’t feel like i can handle a relationship right now, especially with work constantly holding me down.” “i’m sorry, y/n, i shouldn’t have said anything.” you shook your head. “it’s fine, tae, really. besides, you are right about me being pathetically single for nearly five years now.” you joked, turning back to your computer, trying to focus on the email you’d been drafting for hours.

  “jungkook is a great guy, and i would’ve considered dating him, but he just got out of a relationship a month ago, so it wouldn’t be fair to him if I pursued him romantically.” you added, sighing in relief when you finally sent the email, falling back against the soft leather of your office chair.

  “fair enough, besides, he’s got a lot going on right now, with the company and all.” hoseok interjected, flipping through a file. taehyung scoffed. “please, if jungkook has enough time to pick our drunk asses up from the sidewalk, then he can date whenever he wants. he just chooses not to.” you rolled your eyes at their incessant bickering, and start to sort through the pile of papers on your desk.

 you waved goodbye to hoseok and taehyung as you walked out, the cool night air washing over you. a small smile tugged at your lips as you jungkook leaning against his car, scrolling through his phone, the light emitting from the device illuminating his handsome features.

  “jungkook!” you called, causing jungkook to look up, and within seconds, a bright smile etched his features. “y/n!” “you didn’t have to pick me up, you know. i could’ve taken a taxi.” “it’s late, and i figured it wouldn’t be safe for you to be out alone.” he mumbled, color flushing across his cheeks, and you couldn’t help but laugh fondly at the sight. jeon jungkook, one of the most influential figures in seoul, was blushing. “you’re the sweetest, kook, seriously.” you said bemusedly, reaching out and ruffling his hair affectionately.

  “chivalry isn’t dead after all, huh?” you teased as jungkook immediately opened the passenger door for you before you could, and that adorable blush colored his cheeks once again, and you smiled. “thank you, kook. you put other men to shame.” “i-i’m flattered, but i’m really not that g-great of a guy.” “jeon jungkook, you are one of the sweetest and most respectful guys i have ever met, and don’t you dare think otherwise.” you reprimanded gently, and jungkook’s eyes widened, and you couldn’t help but think of a deer caught in headlights.

 “thank you?” you laughed, feeling the stress from work fade away as you climbed into the car, shutting the door gently, jungkook following suit. the ride to jungkook’s house was a comfortable one, and you enjoyed the soft pop music that played in the background while you talked to him about how work was stressing you out, and just how much of a piece of shit namjoon was.

  jungkook frowned when you brought up namjoon, eyebrows furrowing with worry. “are you sure you still want to work for him? the offer i gave you at that banquet still stands.” you sighed, leaning back against the expensive leather of your seat. “i know, and i would love to work with you, but hoseok and taehyung are there, and i don’t know if i can just leave them behind so suddenly.” jungkook hummed thoughtfully. “yeah, that’s fair. if i was working with you or any of my friends, i wouldn’t want to leave either.”

  hoseok sat slumped on taehyung’s couch, the latter sprawled out next to him, eyes fixed on the huge flat screen in front of them. a movie had been playing for the last hour or so, but hoseok hadn’t been paying any attention to it. all he could think about was driving over to jungkook’s house and seeing just what the hell he had called you over for. not that he didn’t trust jungkook.

 hoseok knew that jungkook would never hurt or harm you in any way, and he also knew that you would probably kick his ass if he tried anything. he sighed deeply, which caused taehyung’s gaze to shift over to him, eyebrows furrowed with confusion. “you okay?” hoseok shook his head, and the former sighed. “it’s about y/n, isn’t it?”

 hoseok exhaled softly. “yeah, how’d you know?” taehyung scoffed. “we’ve known each other since high school, i can read you like a book. so, what’s wrong?” “honestly? i’m not sure.”

“are you jealous that jungkook invited y/n to his house something?” he slumped farther on the couch in defeat. “maybe.” he mumbled, shifting his gaze towards the tv, not wanting to see the smug look on taehyung’s face.

  “hyung, look, i know that i’ve told you this a million times already, but you can’t keep pining after her from afar. you might as well just confess, you know, get it out of your system. i mean, you’ve had a crush on her since college, and you never told her how you felt. don’t you think it’s time to do that?” taehyung suggested, voice gentle. hoseok sighed in defeat, as he knew that his friend was right. he needed to stop pining after someone who would never reciprocate his feelings.

    you were sprawled out on the massive couch that took up one side of jungkook’s spacious living room, a bowl of popcorn in your lap. jungkook was next to you, looking impossibly soft in an oversized black hoodie and sweatpants, digging into a cup of ttteokboki, doe eyes fixed on the massive flat screen, which was currently playing kimi no wa, a japanese animated film you adored. “how’d you know i love this movie?” you asked. out of the corner of your eye, you noticed the blush that crept up jungkook’s cheeks, and smiled. 

“taehyung may have emailed me an entire list of all your favorite things when he was drunk.” jungkook mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. you shook your head, laughing softly. i’m so going to kick taehyung’s ass later if he told you any of my deepest, darkest secrets.” jungkook grinned, chocolate brown eyes twinkling with mirth.

  “why, do you have any secrets i should know about?” he asked, voice light and teasing, raising a perfect eyebrow in question. “you’ll have to find that out for yourself, jeon.” you winked, and jungkook laughed, practically falling back against the couch.

  “i’’m glad we got to do this.” jungkook beamed, the smile on his face growing impossibly larger. “me too, it feels like old times.” you agreed. when you were in high school, you and jungkook would sneak out to each other’s houses and binge watch movies all night, forgetting about any responsibilities. “also, it’s jimin’s birthday this weekend, and i was wondering if you would want to go.” you smiled. “of course, wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 

“you can bring hoseok and taehyung with you, i’m sure jimin would love it if they attended.” “i’ll let them know. and thank you for the invite, kook.” said male shrugged. “well, as i am the one who’s in charge of organizing the whole thing, it seems fit that i would make sure my friends are there.”

 you smiled, giving his shoulder a slight nudge. “you’re the best, kook.” said male returned your grin tenfold, the soft glow from the tv casting shadows on his sharp cheekbones.

   “cat got your tongue?” yoongi asked, as he took a sip from his glass of red wine. namjoon didn’t bother to respond, just glared at him in return, and the asshole just smirked. min yoongi was the president of his company, and also happened to be one of his only friends. “seriously, joon, what’s going on? i haven’t seen you this pissed off since freshman year in college when some moron tried to pick a fight with you.” namjoon sighed, swirling the red wine in his glass. “it’s my secretary.” yoongi raised a dark eyebrow in question. “what about her?” “a month ago, she told me she wanted to quit.” yoongi blinked, the only sign that he was the least bit shocked. “i’m sorry, she what?”

  namjoon sighed, draining the rest of his wine and setting the glass on the table in front of him. “it also took me by surprise when she told me. at first, i figured it’s because her salary wasn’t enough or that the workload was overwhelming, but now, i’m not so sure.”

 yoongi hummed thoughtfully. “maybe she’s finally gotten tired of you, i mean, she’s worked for you for what, nine years?” namjoon looked at his longtime friend in disbelief. “are you trying to help me or irritate me?” the former held up his hands in mock surrender. “it’s just an assumption, no need to get pissy about it. don’t worry, you’ll figure something out, you always do.” yoongi reassured him, and namjoon just sighed in response and poured himself another glass of wine.

    you woke up to unfamiliar surroundings, slowly sitting up and rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. well, for starters, you were lying in what was the comfiest bed known to man, with navy blue sheets that were velvet soft, and the rest of the room was significantly bigger than your entire apartment complex, and probably cost more than your entire life savings.

  the next thing that registered in your brain was that you were wearing nothing but a light gray sweater so large that it was practically a dress on you and came up to about mid-thigh, leaving your bare legs on display. you blushed at the realization that you were probably wearing jungkook’s clothes, and quietly slipped out of bed, making your way downstairs.

  you padded to the kitchen, which had a modern but chic style, and found jungkook standing at the stove, making pancakes, wearing nothing but a pair of sweatpants that hung low on his hips, humming softly. you felt your face burn at the sight of jungkook’s bare torso on full display, and tore your gaze away. “m-morning.” you stammered, and mentally slapped yourself for sounding so flustered. jungkook looked up, his handsome face breaking out into a smile that you’d seen countless times, but the sight was still heart-wrenching.

  “morning, did you sleep well? i hope you don’t mind that i’m making pancakes.” jungkook beamed, waving the spatula in his right hand enthusiastically. “i did, the bed was very comfortable, felt like sleeping on a cloud.” the blond male chuckled as he flipped over a pancake. “glad you liked it, the sheets were a gift, by the way.” “oh, from who?” you asked, sitting down on one of the stools that occupied the large kitchen island.

  “my mom. she gave them to me before i left for college, thinking that i would need the most expensive sheets for my dorm.” jungkook went on, laughing amusedly. “at least she gave you something before you left, my mom was so eager to finally be able to kick me out.” you mumbled. “well, if it makes you feel any better, my dad was the same way.” jungkook said sparingly as he placed a plate full of pancakes down on the counter.

 you couldn’t help but stare at his toned torso and the tattoos that covered the entirety of his right arm, a colorful array of words and drawings. “y/n?” jungkook asked, snapping you out of your trance, and you felt color rush to your cheeks as you avoided his gaze, focusing on the plate of fluffy pancakes in front of you.

 you heard jungkook chuckle in amusement as he settled down on the stool in front of you, reaching for an empty plate, the silver bracelets on his wrist clinking with the movement. “c-can you put on a shirt or something?” you muttered as he handed you a plate with two pancakes on it. the amused smirk on his face made you want to punch him as he shook his head. “it’s hot, and i sweat easily.” before you could protest, he gestured towards your plate of pancakes. “eat it before it gets cold.” he grinned, and you just glared at him before digging into your breakfast.

   taehyung hummed softly to himself as he typed up an email to send to his fellow team member. out of the corner of his eye, he saw you make a beeline for your desk. “y/n?” he called, and you froze in your tracks, like a deer in headlights. “are you alright?” he asked, fighting back the laugh that was threatening to burst out of him at your startled expression. “i’m fine, just tired.” hoseok raised an amused eyebrow as he stacked a pile of papers together.

  “how was your date with jungkook?” taehyung asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. you rolled your eyes and shot him a half-hearted glare. “first of all, it was great, and second, it wasn’t a date.” you mumbled, plopping down on your office chair, sighing. hoseok scoffed. “you really expect us to believe that jungkook inviting you over to his house wasn’t a date?”

 taehyung bit back a laugh at your baffled expression. “uh, yes?” hoseok rolled his eyes. “please, that guy definitely wants you.” you glared at him. “jung hoseok if you don’t cut that out i wil strangle you.” said male just grinned. “kinky.” you groaned and threw your hands up in exasperation. “i can’t believe i’m friends with you morons.” taehyung chuckled. “but you love these morons.” you shook your head. “sure, keep telling yourselves that.”

   “all jokes aside, did you get home safe?” taehyung questioned, and hid a smirk at the blush that colored your cheeks. “i-i might’ve spent the night.” out of the corner of his eye, he noticed hoseok tense, as if he was bracing himself for the worst. taehyung thought nothing of it, though. “oh, i see. so, what happened?” your face flushed scarlet at his suggestive tone. “nothing happened you pervert, we watched a movie, i fell asleep and he carried me to one of the guest rooms. that’s all.” taehyung huffed. “seriously?” you threw your hands up in frustration. “i told you nothing happened! now, can we please drop this and start working before our boss yells us at us?” you hissed, and taehyung rolled his eyes. “fine.” he mumbled, turning back to his email.

    namjoon tried not to roll his eyes at the blubbering employee trying to discuss further plans for the department store. the meeting had dragged on longer than he’d liked it to, and so far, namjoon had felt that it was a waste of his time. everyone attending,he noted, were beginning to nod off in their seats, and for once, namjoon couldn’t blame them. if he didn’t have a reputation to uphold, he’d probably be dozing off in this bore of a meeting as well.

 thankfully, the employee finally finished their rambling, and namjoon sighed. “i think that’s enough for today, you’re all dismissed.” he announced , and turned to walk out before anyone could say anything. yoongi, who looked as if he was going to doze off at any second, followed suit, as if he couldn’t wait stand to be around them for much longer.

 “that meeting was a fucking disaster.” yoongi grumbled. “that’s the biggest fucking understatement of the century.” namjoon agreed, fighting back an amused laugh. “i have never wanted to pull my own hair out more than when i decided to attend that pointless meeting.” yoongi lamented, letting out a tired sigh. “tell me about it, that moron didn’t know what he was talking about.” namjoon grumbled, inclining his head in greeting at the employee who greeted him with a polite smile as he walked to his office.

“i’ll see you later, joon, my secretary’s calling, he’s dropping off some documents i need to look at.” namjoon nodded as yoongi gave him a slight wave before turning around and disappeared down the hall. the former sighed and stepped inside his office, already dreading the amount of paperwork he needed to look over and approve.

    hoseok sighed, taking the file from the blushing mess of the girl before him, who had approached him with the most obnoxious smile he’d ever seen. “can i help you?” hoseok asked nonchalantly, opening the file he’d been handed, feigning interest in the papers inside. “i-i was wondering if you’d like to get coffee with me?” she asked, voice lilting, and hoseok groaned inwardly.

  “i’m flattered, but i have a girlfriend.” the lie slipped easily off his tongue, and hoseok ignored the uneasiness that pooled in his stomach and gave the girl a polite smile. said girl looked a bit embarrassed, cheeks flushing red, mumbled something under her breath that hoseok couldn’t quite catch, and walked away, heels clicking on the smooth tiled floor.

  hoseok loosed a breath and leaned back in his office chair, feeling even more exhausted than he had that morning.

   you took a deep breath to soothe your nerves as you knocked softly on namjoon’s office door, ignoring the way your palms were getting clammy. you had no idea why you were so nervous, you had gone into namjoon’s office many times. maybe it was because you were going to attempt to talk to him about that conversation a month ago. after thinking it over, you knew that there was no point in avoiding the subject forever, and knew that the memory of the conversation would probably eat you up inside.

  the firm “come in” could barely be heard through the thick wood of the door, but just loud enough for you to hear, and you stepped inside, steeling yourself for what was about to happen. namjoon sat at his desk, which took up little space , considering how spacious the office was, typing away at the large desktop. you envied how calm and collected he seemed, even after several hours of work.

  “is there something i can help you with?” namjoon mumbled, not bothering to make eye contact with you, the soft clicking of his keyboard practically echoing in the large room. “i-i wanted to discuss something with you.” you blurted, and felt your cheeks grow hot at how blunt you sounded. “well, as you can see, i’m quite occupied at the moment, can it wait?” namjoon sounded bored, dismissive almost, and you fought the urge to leap across the room and deck him in the jaw.

  “i’m afraid it can’t, its urgent.” you said, swallowing down your annoyance. namjoon sighed, clicked a few keys on his computer, and finally looked up at you. “out with it, then.” he muttered, leaning back in his chair.

  “do you recall the conversation we had almost a month ago, after the banquet?” namjoon’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “vaguely, why?” “well, i wanted to talk to you about what i said.” “regarding?” he asked, drumming his slender fingers on the smooth wood of his desk.

  “my working here.” namjoon raised an eyebrow, as if daring for you to elaborate, and you would’ve liked nothing more than to punch him in his irratingly handsome face. “i know that i said i wanted to quit-” “get out.” namjoon’s cold and icy tone cut you off abruptly, making you jump back in shock. “i-” you started, but the cold stare namjoon was giving you told you that it was better if you just did what he said.

 you mumbled an apology and practically ran out of the room, stomach churning with anger and pure annoyance. you must’ve looked furious, because as soon you reached your desk, hoseok’s hazel eyes were wide. “what?” you hissed, immediately regretting it as the former flinched, as if you had slapped him.

  “judging by the fact that you look as if you’re going to snap my neck, the conversation with our boss didn’t go well?” hoseok inquired, raising an eyebrow, and you sighed, practically collapsing onto your chair, managing a weak nod. “he was such an asshole about it, too.” taehyung, who had been not so subtly eavesdropping on your conversation, scoffed. “what did you expect? our boss may be successful, but he’s always been a complete prick.”

 you huffed a laugh. “and how would you know that, tae?” aforementioned male shrugged. “my dad’s been in meetings with him before, and his opinion on our beloved boss is quite negative.”

 “well, i now know that your dad’s opinion is quite accurate. he really just told me to the get the hell out of his office.” you seethed. “jungkook’s job offer doesn’t seem too bad after all.” you mumbled, and taehyung and hoseok’s eyes went wide. “he offered you a job?” hoseok asked, stunned.

  you nodded. “yeah, he actually brought it up during that banquet i attended last month, and i told him i would consider it. and, at first, that was a lie, because i thought, working here isn’t all bad, but after the confrontation i had with that asshole today, well, maybe i should just take jungkook up on his offer.”

  “so, you’re really leaving us?” taehyung asked sadly, and your heart ached. “not yet, i’m planning on staying here for just a few more months, and then i’ll leave. besides, it’ll give me a chance to spend time with you losers before i transfer.” at that, taehyung’s expression brightened, his usual boxy smile tugging at his lips. “be prepared to spend every waking minute of every hour with us.” said male singsonged, cerulean eyes twinkling with mirth.

  hoseok rolled his eyes half-heartedly and started to rearrange the things on his desk, humming softly to himself. “so, with that being said, are you two up to watch a movie tonight at my apartment? you know, just like old times?” you suggested, and felt a smile tugging at your lips when taehyung and hoseok nodded, their expressions eager.

    jungkook sat at his desk, absentmindedly twirling a pen between his fingers as jimin, his clumsy but ever loyal secretary, rattled off his schedule for the next few weeks. he was only half-listening, as another part of his mind was wandering off. “sir? are you even listening to me?” jimin asked, and jungkook hid an amused smile at the slight whine in his voice. “sorry, mr. park, i lost focus for a second.” he teased, and his secretary just rolled his eyes in response.

 “first, are you sure you’re alright? you’ve been spacing out all day. second, how many times do i need to tell you that i hate being called mr. park. you wound me, sir, i had thought we were close enough to drop the formalities.” he huffed, and jungkook couldn’t help the soft laugh that rose out of him. “i’m alright, just exhausted. and sorry, it’s a habit.”

 jimin sighed in defeat, pushing his glasses up with an index finger. “alright, well, if you don’t need anything, i’ll leave you to do whatever it was you were doing before i came in here.” “wait, jimin?” “yes?” his secretary asked, looking over his shoulder. “can you send an email to y/n for me?” jimin raised an eyebrow. “kim namjoon’s secretary? why?”

 jungkook’s face grew hot at the knowing smirk that was curling at the corners of jimin’s mouth. “i-i need to meet with her today. it’s important.” and before jungkook could insist that there was no romantic intentions involved, jimin just nodded, that stupid smirk still on his face, and walked out of his office, closing the door gently behind him. jungkook groaned and buried his face in his hands. he had a lot of explaining to do later.

    your eyes widened in surprise when you saw that jimin had emailed you. curious, you clicked on the email and scanned over it.

 good morning, miss y/n. this is secretary park, from golden closet inc. i just wanted to inform you that my boss, jeon jungkook, wants to meet with you today if you have some time to spare. please let me know as soon as possible.

 p.s. jungkook’s a coward because he had to ask me to email you instead of texting you, you know, like a normal person.

  you laughed at the formality and the added message at the end, and began to type out a reply.

  good morning, secretary park. i have some time to meet with your boss today, specifically around 10:30 or so. thank you for letting me know!

 p.s. jungkook’s always been a coward

 you bit back a smile as you hit send, leaning back in your chair. “did you find hoseok’s middle school photo again? that always makes me laugh.” taehyung asked as he got up to make copies of a document. hoseok, who was making himself a cup of coffee on the other side of the room, turned to glare at said male. “do you ever just shut up?” he hissed. taehyung’s answering grin was anything but apologetic. “nope.” hoseok just rolled his eyes and mumbled something under his breath that none of you could quite catch, and walked back to his desk, coffee mug in hand.

   jungkook rocked back and forth nervously on his heels, ignoring the blatant stares from the employees at the sight of their ceo in the company cafe, of which he seldom went to. he wasn’t sure why he was so nervous, for this wasn’t the first time you were meeting him outside of work. jungkook sighed and pulled out his phone, turning it on and scrolling absentmindedly through instagram, in an attempt to soothe his nerves.

  suddenly, a quiet hush filled the air, and jungkook looked up to see you walking towards him, radiant in a gray pencil skirt and a pale purple blouse that tied at the front, pearl white heels clicking on the smooth tiled floor. jungkook ignored the way his heart skipped a beat at the sight of you, and plastered a bright smile on his face, hoping you couldn’t tell that he was a nervous wreck.

  “hey, jungkook, why’d you want to meet up? not that i mind of course, any opportunity to get away from work is a blessing in disguise.” you beamed, and jungkook huffed a laugh.

 “i’m going to have to report you to your boss and tell him that his secretary is slacking off.” he teased, and you scoffed, rolling your eyes. “please, his ego is too inflated for him to even notice that i’m gone. besides, we had a disagreement today, so i doubt he even wants me around right now.” what’d you fight about? jungkook wanted to ask, but decided that it was none of his business, and you seemed like you didn’t want to talk about it anyway. “should we go?” jungkook asked, offering his arm for you to take.

 you smiled, and hooked your arm through his. “lead the way, jeon.” jungkook rolled his eyes at the use of his last name, which caused a laugh to rise out of you. “what?” “you’re the worst, you know that?” your smile only grew. “but you love me anyway.” you singsonged, eyes twinkling with mirth, and jungkook sighed.

  “why is everyone staring at us?��� you asked, voice dropping to a low whisper, and jungkook shrugged. “beats me, i guess it’s because it’s not every day they see the ceo of their company just hanging around the company cafe.” you laughed softly. “i see.”

 a blushing girl with bright, pink hair shyly walked up to you, head dipping in greeting. “h-hi, i was wondering if you’re dating him?” she asked, and before jungkook could politely tell her no, you cut in. “i’m not, don’t worry. but, if we were, wouldn’t we make a good couple?” you winked, and the pink haired girl’s blush deepened as she managed a small nod.

  you beamed. “thank you.” and with a small wave, you tugged on jungkook’s arm and practically dragged him away. “what was that about?” jungkook asked once they were out of earshot. “you looked uncomfortable, so i decided to be nice and spare you the awkward conversation.” jungkook chuckled. “thanks, i guess.” “don’t mention it, it’s the least i can do after you’ve had to drop my drunk ass off at home countless times.” “do you really think we’d make a good couple?” jungkook teased, and bit back a laugh at the way you blushed profusely. “no comment.” you mumbled, and jungkook smiled as he was led to the elevators.

   jimin looked up from the pile of paperwork he’d been sorting through, and saw jungkook walk out of the elevator in the hall that led to the office, arm in arm with you. he noticed that jungkook was looking at you with an expression on his face that he’d ever seen before, and hid a smirk.

 he looked utterly fond and smitten, and jimin couldn’t wait to tease jungkook about it later. jimin plastered a casual expression on his face as you stepped inside the office, jungkook not too far behind. jimin inclined his head in greeting, and you smiled, waving.

  “jimin! it’s so nice to see you!” you exclaimed, and jimin couldn’t help but smile back. “hi y/n, it’s good to see you too. how’ve you been?” “ah, well, work’s been keeping me busy, as usual. what about you? jungkook being a pain in the ass?” you teased, eyes twinkling with mirth. jimin snickered. “you know it.”

 “i’m right here, you know!” jungkook huffed, nearly whining like a petulant child, and you laughed, reaching out and ruffling his hair affectionately. “sorry, kook, you’re just so fun to tease.” said male rolled his eyes. “yeah, yeah, whatever you say.”

  with that, jungkook turned and walked to his office, and you and jimin watched as he left, giggling softly to yourselves. “he’s really petty, huh?” jimin remarked, though his tone was fond.

you scoffed. “that’s an understatement. jungkook may be one of the most famous figures in korea, but he’s still a big baby trapped in a grown man’s body.”

 “anyways, i should get going before the baby throws a tantrum. see you later, jimin, and let me know when you can have lunch with me so that we can catch up on things.” jimin smiled. “i’d love to.” “great! i’ll let you when and where, obviously. it was nice to see you!” you beamed, matching his smile with a grin of your own.

 jimin watched as you bid him goodbye and walked to jungkook’s office, unaware of all the envious eyes of the female employees that were watching. he rolled his eyes at what they were probably thinking. they probably assumed that you were a golddigger or simply someone who had been successful in flirting with one of the most prominent figures in seoul.

 jimin scoffed and glared at the crowd of female employees that had gathered near the door of jungkook’s office. “ladies, if you all have time to eavesdrop and wait for something that’s never going to happen, then you can get back to work. now.” he snapped, and almost immediately, they all scrambled back to their desks, mumbling apologies under their breath.

  jimin rolled his eyes and turned back to the veritable mountain of papers on his desk, sighing. here’s to another late night, he thought glumly.

    “wow, i guess being a rich ceo does have its perks. this office is gorgeous.” you gushed, taking note of the large glass desk, the couch that took up a third of the space, and the bookshelf that was lined with all kinds of novels, from classics to science fiction. “i didn’t know you were a fan of classics, jeon.” you joked, and hid a smirk at the color that stained jungkook’s cheeks.

 “you never asked.” he muttered, and plopped down on the chair at his desk, sighing. you huffed a laugh and sat down on the couch, leaning back against the pristine leather.

  “so, why did you want to meet with me today? you usually never call me during work hours. is something wrong?” you asked hesitantly, for you were a little nervous of what his answer would be. “i’m not sure, honestly. i guess i just wanted to see you.” he mumbled, color staining his cheeks once again, and you smiled amusedly. “aw, did you really miss me that much?” you joked, and jungkook’s blush deepened. “s-shut up.”

   “but all jokes aside, i’m glad you called me out of work. my morning has been shitty.” at that, jungkook straightened up in his chair a bit, concern flashing across his face. “why? what happened?” you sighed, feeling defeated and exhausted. “my boss happened.” “what did that asshole do this time?” he asked, and you nearly flinched at the uncharacteristic coldness in jungkook’s voice. “well, i tried to have a civilized conversation with him over the conversation i had we had over a month ago, and he practically dismissed me immediately and told me to get the hell out of his office. i mean, he could’ve just said outright that me talking to him was going to be a waste of his time.” you laughed bitterly, feeling your face grow hot.

 suddenly, you felt yourself being pulled into a warm embrace and you practically melted into jungkook’s arms, feeling your body go pliant as he held you, rubbing comforting circles on your back as you sobbed softly. “i feel so pathetic for crying over him and for not having the courage to speak up for fear of losing my job. my mom-” you blubbered, burying your face into jungkook’s firm chest and bunching the fabric of his expensive suit in your hands.

  jungkook didn’t seem to mind that you were potentially wrinkling it, as he just shushed you and held you tighter. “it’s ok, y/n. and you’re not pathetic, not in any sense of the word. none of what happened is your fault.” he whispered, and you nodded, loosening your grip on jungkook’s expensive suit jacket, but didn’t pull away. jungkook’s heart ached as he listened to your soft sobs and held you as if the world was ending.

   thirty minutes later, you were wrapped in a warm blanket and a warm cup of coffee was being pressed into your hand, and you managed to shoot jungkook a grateful smile as said male sat next to you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “i’m sorry for just breaking down like that, i don’t know what came over me.” you blurted, and he shook his head. “don’t apologize, you must’ve been shaken after what happened.” “still, i-” jungkook cut you off with a look that said ”if you don’t stop apologizing, i’m going to be pissed” and you immediately shut up.

  “seriously though, thanks for comforting me.” jungkook smiled. “of course, i’m always here for you, you know that, so don’t hesitate to call me.” “thanks kook, you’re the best.” you said appreciatively, and jungkook’s grin widened, color dusting his cheekbones.

    jimin smiled at the sweet sight of you asleep on jungkook’s shoulder, and quickly sent an email to hoseok and taehyung to let them know that their friend was okay, but would probably be taking the rest of the day off, and leaned back on his chair. “everything alright?” a voice asked, and jimin jumped in surprise as he saw jin standing in front of him. “how long were you standing there?” said male shrugged nonchalantly. “not long.” he said, tone casual, and jimin fought the urge to roll his eyes at the blatant lie. “to answer your question, everything’s fine, jungkook wanted to meet with a friend of his, that’s all.” jin’s light brown eyes narrowed in suspicion. “what?” he asked, quite bluntly at that, and jimin mentally winced at how bitchy he sounded.

 “nothing, it’s just that i’m not sure if you’re lying to me or not.” “lying about what?” jimin asked, mind wracking for lies he could tell to protect you and jungkook. “are jungkook and that girl dating? they seem awfully close.” “they’re just friends from what jungkook told me. and why does that matter, anyway?” his tone must’ve been a bit too defensive, because jin raised his hands in mock surrender. “calm down, i’m not going to go to the press if that’s what you’re worried about. i may be obnoxious, but i’m not stupid.” jimin sighed in relief and ran a hand through his messy hair. “sorry, i didn’t mean to get all defensive.” jin waved off his apology. “it’s fine, i’m not going to press charges or anything.” he laughed, and jimin rolled his eyes. “yeah, yeah, now stop bothering me.” jin scoffed. “please, you know that you enjoy my company, everyone does.” and with an overexaggerated wink, he walked away, humming softly to himself.

  jimin smiled fondly, shaking his head in mock exasperation, and went about sorting through the files on his desk. suddenly, a quiet hush fell over the office, and jimin frowned as he looked up to see what had everyone so silent. he froze once he saw what, or rather, who it was that caused everyone to shut up. kim namjoon, the vice chairman of kim holdings, was standing at the entryway of the office, and he looked furious. shit, this isn’t good. jimin thought, a shudder of fear coursing through him as he practically scrambled off his chair and went to greet namjoon.

  “h-hi, sir, what brings you to the office at this hour?” he asked, plastering on what he hoped was a friendly smile, and namjoon just glared at him, light brown eyes glimmering with pure annoyance and anger. “where is she?” “who are you referring to, sir?” the former just chuckled darkly. “don’t bullshit me park, you know exactly who i’m talking about. where the hell is my secretary?” before jimin could reply, he heard a small voice say ”vice chairman? what are you doing here?” he froze at the sound of your voice, which was slightly hoarse, and jimin mentally winced as he realized that you’d been crying.

  before he could say or do anything to prevent a scene from breaking out, namjoon had already stormed over to you, grabbed your wrist, and started to drag you out of the office. “ let me go!” you exclaimed, eyes filling with tears, and jimin’s heart broke at the sight.

  “hey! asshole! she told you to let go, are you deaf or something?!” jungkook yelled, and the expression on his face was one that jimin had never seen before, one of pure fury and hatred. “i don’t remember asking you to interfere, jeon. this is a matter between my secretary and i. now, run along and leave us be.” namjoon leered, and turned to walk away, and before jimin could even blink, jungkook had leapt forward and grabbed ahold of your wrist. “i said, let her go, you prick.” he hissed, chocolate brown eyes glittering with malice.

  namjoon was unfazed as he laughed patronizingly. “what are you going to do about it, jeon? call your dad and make him press charges against me?” he taunted, and in a flash, the older of the two fell onto the floor, grunting in pain, grip loosening on your wrist, and you immediately ran over to jungkook, throwing your arms around his neck and sobbing.

  jungkook returned the embrace, but glared at the tall male sprawled out on the tiled floor, pinching his now bloody nose, dark eyes gleaming. “get the fuck out of my company, you’re not ever welcome here.” namjoon clenched his jaw in anger and looked like he’d rather strangle jungkook for giving him a direct order as if he was his boss, but just slowly stood up, turned, and stormed out.

   jimin ran over to you and jungkook, unsure of what to do, hands hovering in the air awkwardly. “a-are you two okay?” “i’m fine, but she’s not.” jungkook breathed, scooping you up into his arms, carrying you bridal style. “i’m going to drop her off at her house and make sure she’s okay. if i’m not back in an hour, tell everyone to go home.” jimin barely managed a nod before jungkook walked out of the office with you in his arms, and he felt the tension in the air loosen a bit, and jimin let out a long, shaky breath. he wasn’t sure what he had just witnessed, but jimin knew that things weren’t going to be the same after today.

    you sat pale-faced on your couch, tucked into jungkook’s side, his arm wrapped around your shoulders. “i’m so sorry you had to witness that.” he mumbled tone apologetic, and you shook your head. “it was shocking, to say the least, but not unexpected. i mean, he’s always been like that.” “like what? a complete asshole?” you let out a soft laugh, despite your current state. “yeah, that, but he’s always been weirdly protective of me, in his own way.” jungkook scoffed. “yeah, if you count forcibly dragging you out of my company protective.”

  “yeah, we’ve always had a weird relationship, i guess.” you murmured, snuggling deeper into jungkook’s side, resting your head on his shoulder. “do you mind if i take a little nap? i’m a little exhausted from today.” jungkook shook his head. “no, i don’t mind, go ahead.” his pulse quickened at the small, grateful smile you gave him before closing your eyes. “ok, but don’t blame me if your shoulder hurts later.” you laughed, and a few seconds later, you were fast asleep, and jungkook finally allowed himself a small smile.

   you woke to a worried hoseok and taehyung, who immediately pulled you into a hug. “we were so worried! don’t you fucking dare do this to us again! you nearly gave us a heart attack!” taehyung scolded half-heartedly, while hoseok nodded in agreement. “i’m sorry, i didn’t have a chance to call you.” you apologized, and said males just ruffled your hair affectionately.

  “it’s ok, y/n, just don’t do anything like that again because if you do, we will have no choice but to stalk you.” taehyung declared, and hoseok rolled his eyes. “can you be serious for one day in your life?” the former shook his head. “nope, it’s not in my vocabulary.”

 hoseok ignored him. “so, what happened, exactly? we tried to ask jungkook, but he said that we should hear that from you.” at the mention of jungkook’s name, you perked up. “jungkook? where is he?” you asked, looking around for said male, and hoseok handed you a folded piece of paper. “he told us to give you this once you were awake.”

  you carefully unfolded the paper, and saw that it was a note to you, written in jungkook’s elegant but slanted scrawl.

  hey sleepyhead, if you’re reading this, you’re probably awake by now, which means that i have gone home. i’m sorry i didn’t leave without saying goodbye, but i felt like you needed to be alone for today. and besides, i can’t leave jimin alone for very long, or he’ll start freaking out, you know how he is. i texted hoseok and taehyung, and they’ll be here to look after you later. don’t hesitate to text me if you need anything. please take care of yourself for me, ok?

 jungkook

  sighing, you folded the letter and placed it on the coffee table. “well, jungkook had jimin email me that he wanted to see me, and so i did. then, a few hours passed and then he showed up.” “who showed up?” taehyung asked, cerulean eyes glimmering with curiosity.

 “the vice chairman showed up, tried to drag me out of the company, and then he and jungkook started arguing, and then the next thing i knew, jungkook was hugging me and our boss had a bloody nose.” taehyung and hoseok’s eyes widened. “jungkook punched him?” they asked in disbelief, and you nodded, wincing at the memory. “he did, and then told our boss to the get the fuck out of his company.” taehyung let out a low whistle. “damn, jungkook’s got guts.”  

  “more like a death wish. if everyone weren’t so afraid of our boss, there’d probably be a video of him getting beat up on the internet right now.” hoseok mumbled, tone grave. “well, i’m just glad that no one got seriously hurt. who knows what our boss would’ve done if there weren’t any witnesses.” you shuddered, and taehyung shot you a sympathetic look.

 “how the hell am i going to show my face at work? the vice chairman was so pissed when he saw me, and i can’t imagine what he’s going to say if i continue to show up at work. i mean, i’m his secretary for fucks sake, i can’t just avoid him!” you groaned, burying your face into taehyung’s shoulder, and said male patted your head, as if in comfort.

 “well, on the bright side, he hasn’t fired you yet.” taehyung chirped, and you smacked his shoulder gently. “cut that out!” hoseok reprimanded, and the former just pouted and started to rub comforting circles on your back.

   “you could call in sick?” hoseok suggested, but you shook your head. “there’s no way he’d believe that. i’ve never called in sick in the nine years i’ve worked for the guy, and not once have i ever taken a sick leave.” “maybe you should?” taehyung interjected. “i mean, this could be the perfect opportunity to finally get some rest.” hoseok nodded. “i agree with tae, you haven’t gotten proper sleep in months, so you could really use this time to relax and try to get your mind off work.” you hesitated. i don’t know, i mean, where would i even go? i can’t just crash anywhere here, the vice chairman will know immediately.” hoseok threw his hands up in exasperation. “seriously? what is with this guy and his stalker-like ways of keeping tabs on you?”

 “do you know anyone who would be willing to let you stay at their place for a while? i mean, hoseok hyung and i would be happy to let you stay with us, but that’d probably the first place that the vice chairman would check, he knows you’re friends with us.” before hoseok could voice his agreement, you held up a hand, stopping him from doing so. “look, guys, i appreciate you two trying to find a way to wipe me off the face of the planet, but if i run away, won’t that show that i’m a coward? i know that working there from now on won’t be easy, but i don’t want him to think that i’m someone who runs away when things turn upside down.”

 taehyung let out a dramatic wail and buried his face in the crook of your neck.“ you’re so brave!” he fake sobbed, and you laughed, patting his back gently, and hoseok looked on with a fond yet exasperated smile on his face.

    jungkook braced himself before knocking firmly on namjoon’s office door, ignoring the voice in the back of his mind that was screaming at him to run away. he felt shitty for lying to you about his whereabouts, but what namjoon had done was a new low, and jungkook knew that he wouldn’t be able to forget it until he properly confronted said male about it.

   when he heard the authortative “come in”, jungkook wasted no time in swinging the door open and slamming it behind him. namjoon looked up from the files he’d been scanning over, and almost immediately, a look of pure annoyance flashed across his face, and jungkook resisted the urge to smirk. “what the hell are you doing here?” namjoon hissed, eyes glittering with hatred.

 “i’m not here to gloat or do whatever it is you think, i just want to talk.” jungkook replied, holding his hands up in mock surrender, and namjoon scoffed. “you really expect to believe that? after you gave me a bloody nose?” “look, i didn’t mean for things to get so out of hand at my office, but i let my anger get the best of me, and i apologize for that.” jungkook placated, mentally wincing at how genuinely apologetic he sounded.

  namjoon let out a long, suffering sigh. “very well, let’s “talk”. he gestured for him to take the seat across from him, and jungkook did just that, making sure to lean back and cross his legs as soon as he was seated, in an attempt to seem nonchalant.

  “can you explain to me why you gave me a bloody nose?” jungkook bit back a laugh at the pure venom in namjoon’s voice, and shrugged. “beats me, perhaps you should ask that inflated ego of yours.” jungkook said coolly, and the older male glared daggers at him.

  “watch your tongue, jeon.” jungkook rolled his eyes. “what are you going to do? cut it off?” he taunted, and namjoon’s scowl deepened. “if you’re not going to be serious, then you can show yourself out of my office.” he seethed, and jungkook inwardly sighed. “okay, fine, i honestly don’t understand why you were so pissed off when you found out where your secretary was.” he blurted, and namjoon raised an eyebrow at his sudden boldness.

  “if you’re implying what i think you are, then you must have a false sense of reality. y/n was supposed to be at work, and instead, she was spending time with you, of all people. i had a right to be angry, after all, i am her boss.” jungkook curled his hands into fists, resisting the urge to lunge forward and give namjoon another bloody nose at the utter contempt in the latter’s voice.

  “as correct as that may be, you had no right to barge into my company uninvited and nearly injure your secretary from how tight you were holding her wrist. you could’ve snapped it in half.” jungkook snarled, blood boiling at the way namjoon rolled his eyes.

  “please, she doesn’t seem that fragile, and even if i did break her wrist, maybe it’d teach her a lesson for choosing to fuck around with the ceo of a rival company instead doing what she’s supposed to.” jungkook couldn’t take it anymore. he practically leaped out of his chair, lunging forward and slugging namjoon in the jaw, causing the latter to fall to the ground with a loud thud.

  “how dare you insult her? she’s practically your slave! she works around the clock for you, with no complaints, and yet you still have the nerve and the audacity to look down on her? even after all the bullshit that you make her do? she’s fucking exhausted and overworked, and yet you still overlook all she’s done for you? if i were her, i’d want to get the hell away from you too. i mean, no one can genuinely enjoy working for you, right? as smart as you are, you can be quite dense, you know that? don’t you dare lay a finger on her, for i will see to it that she’s transferred to another company, and don’t think i won’t hesitate to do so. go fuck yourself, kim namjoon, and i can’t believe i used to look up to a pretentious asshole like you.” jungkook growled, and not bothering to spare his former friend a second glance, turned on his heels and stormed out of the room.

    namjoon sat on the floor of his office, holding his jaw, shocked from what had just happened. jeon jungkook, the entitled brat, had the nerve to show his face in his office and punch him, of all things. he gritted his teeth in anger, ignoring the sharp pain that shot through his jaw at the action, and managed to brace himself onto his chair.

  he wasn’t sure why his body felt so numb, for he’d only been punched in the face, but the hit had taken him by surprise that he’d fallen to the floor in an awkward manner and had just barely managed to sit up. namjoon rubbed his now aching jaw and made a mental note to make jungkook’s life a living hell.

   suddenly, his phone buzzed, and namjoon sighed, pulling it out of his suit pocket, and answering it without a second thought. “hello?” “joon?” he sighed in relief at the familiar voice. “yoongi?” “thank fuck, joon, i’ve been trying to get ahold of you for two hours now. where the fuck are you?” he asked, evident concern in his voice, and namjoon sighed.

 “i’m in my office.” he mumbled. “then why the hell haven’t you texted me, or called me to let me know that you’re not, i don’t know, lying dead in a ditch somewhere?” yoongi scolded, and namjoon just let out a defeated sigh. “i was occupied, jeon jungkook came to see me.”

 yoongi barked a laugh. “jeon jungkook? the ceo of golden closet inc? came to see you? why?” “i’d rather not talk about this over the phone.” namjoon griped, and he could imagine yoongi smirking over the line.

  “alright, fine, i’m on my way.” he said, and then the call ended. namjoon closed his eyes and slumped against the cool leather of his chair. he was fucking exhausted and in dire need of a nap.

  jungkook ignored the stares he was getting as he sauntered into his office, closing the door behind him. he sighed and buried his face into his hands, feeling a wave of regret crashing over him. he was the biggest idiot of the century, if not of the entirety of korea for barging into kim namjoon’s office uninvited, and for physically harming him. if the media caught word of what he’d done, they’d never let him live it down. jimin is going to kick my ass, he thought, wincing at the image of his secretary yelling at him, and trudged over to his desk, nearly stumbling as he sat on his chair, mind swimming with thoughts.

  a soft but firm knock sounded at his door minutes later, and jungkook exhaled deeply, knowing immediately who it was. jimin didn’t wait for an answer, for he swung the door open, his expression unreadable, and jungkook braced himself for the lecture he was about to receive, as if he were a student who had just been caught vandalizing school lockers.

  “jungkook.” he said, and while his tone held no visible anger, jungkook knew jimin well enough that that tone meant he was beyond pissed. “jimin.” he gulped nervously. “i-i can explain.” jungkook stammered, which earned him a glare from the former.

  “how could you be so reckless?! do you have any idea what would happen if the press found out about this? your reputation would be ruined and cameras would be following you everywhere! you would have to wear ridiculous disguises in order to not be recognized or some bullshit like that! for fucks sake jungkook, can you just not play the hero for once? i know you care about y/n, but punching her boss in the face twice isn’t going to help anything!” jimin was practically fuming, and the tips of his ears were red, and if jungkook didn’t feel so guilty, he would’ve thought that steam was coming out of them.

  “i’m sorry, i know it was stupid of me-” jimin scoffed. “that’s the biggest fucking understatement of the year, jungkook. you fucked up. big time. and since you got yourself into this mess, you’re going to get yourself out of it. fix this, or i will kick your ass. and don’t think i’m not capable. i didn’t train in kendo and taekwondo for eight years for nothing.”

 jungkook swallowed against the bile in his throat, feeling dread pool in his stomach, very well aware that despite his short stature, jimin could easily (and would) kick his ass if he wanted to. with one last icy glare, his secretary stormed out of his office, turning on his heel and making sure to slam the door behind him, the noise echoing in the spacious room.

  jungkook groaned and buried his face in his hands. how the hell would he get himself out of this one? suddenly, his phone rang, shrill and obnoxiously loud, and jungkook sighed as he answered it. “hello?” he asked, not bothering to sound enthusiastic. “kook?” almost immediately, his heart warmed at the sounded of your voice. “y/n, hey, how are you holding up?” “i could ask the same thing about you.” you mumbled, voice impossibly soft, and jungkook felt his heart ache with regret and guilt. 

“you heard what happened, huh?” he asked sheepishly, and heard you laugh softly. “yeah, i did, hoseok and taehyung are in the company group chat, and everyone was talking about it there.” “y/n, i’m so sorry, i shouldn’t have done that, i let my anger get the better of me, and i already got yelled at it by jimin.” he rambled, and felt his face flush with embarrassment. “it’s okay, i know you were just trying to protect me, in your own way.” you sighed, and jungkook could imagine you running a hand through your hair.

 “look, just promise me that you won’t go to the company anymore? if we’re going to see each other, it’s going to be at either your house or mine. i know it’s still risky, but i’m not going to let this situation affect my friendship with you.” you sounded determined, and jungkook, despite himself, smiled. “so rebellious.” he teased, and bit back a laugh when you scoffed. “jeon jungkook, you have the worst timing, you know that?” you scolded, but jungkook could hear the amusement in your voice, and laughed. “i’m aware.”

  “i have to go, hoseok and taehyung are attempting to make me dinner in the kitchen and i have to make sure they don’t burn my apartment down.” jungkook laughed at that, knowing that the possibility of that actually happening was unlikely, for hoseok and taehyung were actually good cooks. “okay, talk to you later?” “yeah, see you, jungkook. take care, alright?” jungkook felt his grin widen. “yeah, you too.” after the call ended, he leaned back against his chair, feeling a little better then he had just minutes ago.

    you tried not to roll your eyes as hoseok and taehyung bickered about whether or not cucumbers belonged in kimchi, and shoveled a spoonful of fried rice in your mouth, chewing thoughtfully. the day had been exhausting, and you were more than ready to crawl into bed and enter dreamland as soon as your head hit the pillow.

  “do you think cucumbers belong in kimchi? tell hoseok hyung he has no taste for thinking they don’t.” taehyung asked, snapping you out of your trance. you shrugged, gulping down your glass of soda. “i don’t really care either way.” you said, and taehyung pouted. “you wound me, y/n, i thought you would take my side after all we’ve been through together.” he fake sobbed, and buried in his face in hoseok’s shoulder, who just rolled his eyes and patted the former on the head. “there there, it’s not your fault that y/n likes me more.” hoseok teased, hazel eyes twinkling with mirth, and taehyung only sobbed louder.

   you shook your head, smiling fondly, and went to wash your dishes. before you could even put soap on the sponge, a warm hand caught at your wrist, and you looked up to see hoseok. “let me do that, you’re clearly exhausted. i’ll take care of taehyung, you just go and get some sleep.” he said softly, and before you could protest, the sponge was pulled out of your grip and were being gently shoved to the side. you sighed in defeat and shot hoseok a grateful and reproachful look, and he just smiled in response.

  after a quick shower and changing into a loose, white shirt and gray sweatpants, you crawled into bed, sighing in relief when your head finally hit the pillow. the day had been truly exhausting, and you were so glad that it was finally over. you felt yourself slowly drifting into dreamland, and before you knew it, sleep took over.

   taehyung took a long sip of the coffee hoseok had made for him, lost in thought. yesterday’s events had felt like a fever dream, and he was still in disbelief that they had even happened. he leaned back in his chair, watching the office bustle with activity, and the soft whirring sounds of the printer and copier in the background, as well as the rustling of paper and typing of keys.

 despite the chaos that took place just twenty four hours ago, everyone was acting as if it had never happened, going about their day as they normally would. taehyung supposed he should do the same, after all, what had happened didn’t involve him in any way, nor had he been there to witness it, but from what you had told him, it wasn’t pretty.

  our boss is probably fucking pissed, taehyung thought, wincing inwardly at the image of the vice chairman barking orders at them. the coffee he’d been drinking suddenly tasted too bitter, and taehyung set his mug down on his desk with a sigh. he looked longingly towards your empty desk, wishing that you were there to talk to him, but earlier that morning, you had decided to take the day off and would come back to work the next day.

 taehyung couldn’t blame you. the company was probably the last place you wanted to be, especially after the disaster that occurred the day before. he stretched, feeling his joints pop with the movement, and set to work in an attempt to distract himself.

   hoseok kept sparing a glance at his phone every few seconds, waiting for a text which otherwise never came, and bit his lip anxiously. even though he knew that you were safe at home, hoseok couldn’t help but worry. after all, you were pretty shaken up from yesterday, and he hadn’t wanted to come into work, but you had shoved him and taehyung out the door, along with a threat to strangle them if they didn’t get “their asses to work.”

  hoseok knew that you were perfectly capable of taking care of yourself, and there was a small part of him that was screaming at him to forget about you and focus on work, but he just couldn’t. not when there was a possibility that the vice chairman could drop by at any moment. hoseok shook the thought from his mind as he feigned interest in the papers on his desk.

  silence fell over the office, and hoseok ignored the slight chill that coursed through his body as he forced himself to look up. the vice chairman didn’t bother to acknowledge anyone as he strode right for his office, closing the door firmly behind him, and hoseok let out a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding.

    you sighed and wrapped the blanket taehyung had lent you before leaving for work tighter around you. your day had been absolutely miserable and unproductive, with you lounging around in the house in your pajamas and binge-watching dramas. and because you had no pets or a significant other, you were all alone, and that simple fact made your spirits deflate a bit.

  you wished taehyung and hoseok were here, and you regretted forcing them to go to work, and you wished that you could call jungkook to keep you company, but you felt that you had caused him enough trouble, especially after the fiasco of events that happened yesterday.

  though the weather was quite pleasant today, cloudless and sunny, your mood hadn’t improved. you slumped down on your couch and closed your eyes, deciding that a nap would be the best thing for you, and soon drifted off into dreamland.

    namjoon drummed his fingers on his desk, trying to quell his annoyance. you hadn’t bothered to show up today, and instead, it had been one of the interns who had covered for you, and they had done a terrible job, messing up the reports twice and lying about his schedule. and because his patience had worn thin, namjoon had just told them to take the rest of the day off, and that he would handle things himself.

  so far, things had gone surprisingly well, and he had been on time for all his meetings, thanks to yoongi having the memory of an elephant’s. despite that, though, namjoon was still irritated that you hadn’t bothered to message him personally to let him know that you wouldn’t be coming into work today, instead of just calling the receptionist.

 he pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation just as yoongi sauntered in his office, laughing in amusement. “what’s bothering you now?” namjoon glared at the former as he plopped down on one of the chairs, crossing his legs and raising a questioning eyebrow, as if to say ”well, are you going to tell me or what?” namjoon sighed. “have you ever had your secretary not bother to show up for work?” yoongi’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “i’m not sure i’m following.” yoongi trailed off, and namjoon resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

  “she didn’t show up for work today.” namjoon blurted, and yoongi just looked at him in disbelief. “i’m failing to see how this is an issue, joon, i mean, you literally work her to the bone on the daily, don’t you think she deserves some time off?” namjoon narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “are you defending her?” he asked, and the accusatory tone in his voice, yoongi blanched, holding his hands up in mock surrender.

  “i’m not, i barely know her, but i’m just saying that getting pissed over something like that is kind of… well… pathetic.” namjoon pursed his lips tightly, resisting the urge to yell at him, but deep down, he knew yoongi was right. why the hell was he getting so worked up over something so trivial? besides, this was the only day you had ever taken off of work, and namjoon supposed he could give you a pass this time.

  namjoon exhaled softly, feeling defeated and overall exhausted. “you’re right, i’m being pathetic.” yoongi’s expression softened slightly at how weary his friend looked. “hey, don’t beat yourself up over it, okay? i’d be kind of annoyed if my secretary took off without notice.” he admitted, and namjoon gave him a grateful look.

   as the taxi rumbled down the street, hoseok leaned his head against the glass of the window and sighed, skyscrapers and neon signs blurs of color in his vision. “what’s with you? worried about y/n or something?” taehyung asked, and hoseok fought the blush that threatened to creep onto his face as he scoffed, turning slightly to face the former. “no, i’m sure she’s fine.” he said, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, but taehyung just laughed. “hyung, please, it’s alright to admit that you’re worried about her, you know, i am too.”

   hoseok sighed in defeat. “ok, fine, i’m worried about her. happy?” even in the darkness of the taxi, he knew that taehyung was probably sporting the most smug grin in the world. “yes, yes i am, actually, thanks for asking!” he beamed, and hoseok rolled his eyes.

  “i know it seems like all i do is think and talk about her, but after what happened yesterday…” hoseok trailed off, unsure of what to add, and luckily, taehyung just hummed in agreement. “yeah, i get it, i mean, she’s probably still shocked over what happened, and honestly, if i was her, i’d be too.” hoseok gave the latter a grateful look and turned to look back out the window.

   you watched as raindrops splattered against your window, sliding down the glass like tears, and clutched the steaming mug of coffee in your hands tightly. it’d had started raining a few minutes after you had woken from your nap and decided to make yourself a cup of coffee, and the change in weather had only worsened your mood.

  you turned away from the window, taking a slow slip of your coffee, the bitter taste of the drink lingering on your tongue as you padded over the couch, gently settling down on one of the cushions, sighing. you had just set your mug down when a soft but firm knock sounded at your door, making you jump in surprise.

  “who is it?” you called as you practically dragged yourself over to the door, feeling extremely worn out. “if i say my name, i might get mobbed.” a voice said, teasing and familiar, and your heart skipped a beat upon realizing who it was, and went to unlock your door.

  sure enough, jungkook was standing in your doorway, a plastic bag full of takeout boxes in one hand, and a stuffed shiba inu in the other, and immediately, you felt your spirits lifted. he was still in a suit, which meant that he must’ve come straight from work, and his blond hair was messy and damp from the rain.

  “surprise!” he exclaimed, lips widening into a bright grin, and despite your current state, you couldn’t help but match his grin with one of your own. “jungkook, what are you doing here? and what’s with the food and the stuffed animal?”

 “oh these?” he asked, gesturing to said items in his arms, grin widening. “these are for you, thought you could use some cheering up, you know, especially after everything that happened yesterday.” color bloomed on his cheeks, and you fought back an amused smile as you took the food and stuffed animal from him.

  “thank you kook, this is so sweet.” you beamed, walking over to place the bag of food on the kitchen counter. jungkook’s blush deepened and he fidgeted nervously in the doorway.

 “are you going to come in or do i need to drag you?” you teased, and jungkook laughed. “i felt like i was invading your privacy by showing up here unannounced.” he said sheepishly as he stepped inside, shrugging off his shoes and placing them neatly on the mat outside.

 you scoffed. “please, you know that you are always welcome here, invited or not. also, did hoseok and tae put you up to this by any chance?” you asked curiously, and jungkook shook his head, padding over to the couch and plopping down on one of the cushions.

 “they don’t even know that i’m here.” he sing-songed, and you rolled your eyes. “so what, you just decided to show up to my house out of the blue like some stalker?” you teased, and jungkook laughed. “i just wanted to make sure you were okay.” he mumbled, and you felt your heart warm.

  “well, if im being honest, my day has been quite disastrous.” jungkook’s brows furrowed in concern. “why?” you shrugged, hugging the stuffed animal to your chest. “i guess it’s because of what happened yesterday. i know i sound like a broken record at this point, but somehow it’s affected me in a way that i honestly don’t understand. i mean, i wasn’t physically harmed, but for some reason, i feel like that what happened was partially my fault.” you admitted, cheeks flaming with half-embarrassment and shame, and jungkook’s expression grew irrevocably soft.

  “i’m not the best with words, but all i want you to know is that what happened between me and your boss was all because i was reckless and so caught in my anger that i took it out on him, and while he may have gotten mad on your behalf, i don’t think that anything was your fault, so please don’t blame yourself.” jungkook said, tone impossibly gentle, and you felt your heart swell with an overwhelming sense of gratefulness. you truly didn’t deserve jeon jungkook as friend.

  “thank you, kook, and honestly, that’s one of the kindest things someone has said to me in the last twenty four hours, so i really appreciate what you said.” you said, a small smile tugging at your lips.

   jungkook returned your grin with one of his own, eyes crinkling at the corners. “so, do you want to break in the food? or?” he asked, and you giggled, moving to take the take out boxes out of the plastic bag they’d been stored in. “you read my mind, jeon.”

yoongi observed his friend, eyes narrowing in suspicion at the almost awkward way namjoon was carrying himself, and the tense set of his shoulders as he rattled off commands to the resources team, who were hanging on his every word and hurriedly jotting down notes, as if namjoon was reciting some philosophical quote. he frowned, wondering if it was because of the absence of a certain secretary, or simply because the older male was just plain exhausted.

  yoongi quickly schooled his features into neutrality as namjoon’s gaze shifted towards him, and feingning interest in the files that had been placed in front of him nearly an hour ago. the meeting regarding investments had dragged on for longer than he’d liked it to, and he was trying not to nod off during the presentations. he’d never been one for attending said meetings, but since namjoon insisted that yoongi be there, well, the younger male couldn’t exactly refuse. after all, the older was his boss.

  once the meeting was over, yoongi tried not to show that he wanted to get the hell out of the room, and casually sauntered over to the door, eyes shifting to the side to make sure namjoon wasn’t looking, and sure enough, the former was deep in conversation with a female employee, and yoongi took the opportunity to slip out of the room, unnoticed.

   as soon as he was in the safety of his own office, yoongi let out a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding, feeling his shoulders relax a bit, and practically collapsed onto his chair, completely drained. trying to avoid awkward confrontation was harder than it looked, and yoongi felt put out from the ordeal.

  he sighed, racking his brain to try and find a way to talk to namjoon without it being awkward, and came up with nothing. yoongi leaned back against his chair and closed his eyes, deciding that perhaps a nap would help him.

      namjoon smiled tightly as the employees filed out of the conference room. as soon as the door closed, he sighed in relief and flopped down onto an empty chair, feeling his neck throb with a dull ache. the day had been quite long, and while namjoon knew it was inevitable, as it came with the job, but it never failed to drain all the life out of him.

 yoongi had been acting strange the entire day, not bothering to drop by his office as he usually did, and purposefully keeping his distance at the meeting. namjoon rubbed at his temples, feeling a migraine starting to form, and breathed a long, suffering sigh.

you braced yourself before stepping inside the office, preparing for the worst, and made it over to your desk without anyone whispering or looking at you, and as soon as you reached your desk, hoseok looked over at you, concern evident on his features.

 “you ok?” he asked in a low voice, and you nodded, giving him what you hoped was a convincing smile. hoseok didn’t look too convinced, but he didn’t press further, instead wordlessly handed you a bottle of water. “just in case.” he mumbled, and you shot him a grateful smile.

   “where’s tae?” you whispered, noticing that the raven haired male was nowhere to be seen. “that idiot will be running late today. he forgot to make the powerpoint that’s supposed to be presented at the meeting two hours from now, so he’s probably scrambling to get it done as we speak.” hoseok grumbled, rolling his eyes, and you bit back a laugh.

  “also, jungkook dropped by my apartment yesterday.” you said nonchalantly, and the corner of hoseok’s lips curled into a small smirk, and you felt your face grow hot. “not like that you asshole, he came by with food and a stuffed animal to check up on me, that’s all.” that stupid smirk never left his face as he sifted through a pile of papers on his desk. “whatever you say, y/n.” he sing-songed, and you glared at him.

  “you’ve been hanging out with taehyung too much.” you chided, and hoseok chuckled softly, shrugging. “it just kind of happened you know?” “yeah, yeah, whatever.” you griped, and hoseok’s grin just grew wider.

   the meeting went by fast, and taehyung was sure he was rambling about pure nonsense, but his boss’s expression never changed, save for the slight furrowing of an eyebrow here and there, but no reaction whatsoever, and taehyung took that as a sign that the powerpoint that he had thrown together was decent enough.

  taehyung exhaled softly, relieved that the meeting had somehow gone smoothly, despite his last minute powerpoint, and turned to walk out the door, eager to get back to his desk, but froze when his boss finally spoke.

 “kim taehyung?” he said, and taehyung ignored the pounding of his heart as he turned to face his boss, plastering on what he hoped was a convincing smile. “yes, vice chairman? is there something i can do for you?” taehyung mentally winced at how much he sounded like a kiss-up, and awaited for the older’s response.

 time seemed to trickle by slowly, and namjoon finally cleared his throat, breaking the silence at last, and taehyung tried to school his features into neutrality, trying to seem as composed as possible. “you’re close with my secretary, correct?” namjoon questioned, and taehyung tried not to show any signs of shock on his face at the sudden question.

  “correct, sir, y/n and i have been friends since college. why do you ask?” “i was just curious, you can go.” he said, waving his hand dismissively.  taehyung blinked, the only sign that he was the slightest bit confused, and quickly mumbled something under his breath before fleeing the room.

  he must’ve looked surprised because as soon as he sat down at his desk, you looked over at him, eyebrows furrowed with concern. “tae? are you alright? you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

 “i just got out of a meeting with the boss, and he asked me if i was close to you.” your eyes widened by a slight fraction, and hoseok looked on curiously. “what? why?” taeyung shrugged. “beats me, he didn’t explain why.” “that’s so weird, i wonder what he’s putting in his coffee lately.” hoseok chuckled, gulping down the water bottle on his desk.

  “yeah, and he hasn’t called me in his office at all today.” you added, and twirled the pen in your hands absentmindedly. “well, whatever the reason is, let’s just be thankful that he didn’t fire you right on the spot.” taehyung mumbled, and you scoffed. “yeah, i’d like to see him try to function without me around. i mean, the man can’t even organize the stuff on his desk, i have to do everything for him. i feel like a babysitter more than a secretary sometimes.” you sighed, and ran a hand through your hair.

  hoseok frowned. “so what, he just orders you around all the time?” you laughed softly. “well, yeah, i mean, that’s kind of his job?” “yeah, but he goes overboard half the time.” taehyung added, reaching for a file on his desk.

    namjoon chewed his lower lip nervously as he drummed his fingers on the smooth wood of his desk, mind swimming with thoughts. he wasn’t sure what prompted him to ask taehyung such a pointless question. why did he care if he and his secretary were close or not?

 he sighed, resisting the urge to run a hand through his hair in frustration. namjoon wasn’t sure what was wrong with him lately, as he usually wasn’t this scatterbrained. yoongi had also noticed that he’d been acting weird, and namjoon knew he was probably holding back from saying anything to avoid stressing him out more.

 get your shit together, namjoon, investors from spain are going to be visiting the company tomorrow, and you need to make sure they walk out knowing that they won’t regret investing in the company. namjoon thought to himself, feeling put out from the long day, when the phone on his desk rang, causing him to let out a long, suffering sigh.

  “yes?” he asked, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. “sir? someone is here to see you, is now not a good time?” you said, and namjoon could hear the slight nervousness in your tone.

  “i’m not particularly busy right now, so, who’s here?” there was a slight pause, and before namjoon could say anything, you blurted, “well, erm, it’s jungkook?”

 namjoon froze in his seat, and felt his blood run cold at the mention of the younger male’s name. “why the hell is he here? give him the phone.” he hissed, and heard slight rustling on the other end.

 “hello namjoon, bet you weren’t expecting me just to show up uninvited, huh?” jungkook taunted, and he could hear the smugness in his former friend’s tone. “i think we should skip pleasantries, don’t you?” namjoon said, trying to keep his voice as calm as possible, despite the anger that was bubbling in his stomach.

   jungkook chuckled lowly. “i think that would be best. so, do you have time to talk to me, or are you too busy busting people’s asses for not getting their work done?” now it was namjoon’s turn to laugh. “very funny jeon, and just for that, say what you need to and leave.” “what, right now? what, you’re too scared to talk to me face to face?” namjoon curled his hands into fists at the younger male’s mocking tone. “no, i just think that seeing your face will ruin my appetite, i’m getting dinner after this, you know.” he smirked, and could imagine jungkook’s eyes glimmering with annoyance.

  “fine.” he griped, and then mumbled something that namjoon couldn’t quite catch. “do you remember the banquet and the brief confrontation we had?” namjoon clenched his jaw as he hissed, ”vaguely, why?” “oh no reason, just thought i’d let you know that i offered y/n a position at my company.” jungkook said, and had the audacity to sound casual about it, as if he hadn’t just dropped a bomb in namjoon’s life. “you what?” he seethed, grip tightening slightly on the phone.

  “geez, no need to get so worked up about it, she didn’t accept, but did consider it. anyways, that’s all i wanted to tell you, have a nice night!” jungkook exclaimed with fake enthusiasm as the line went dead.

 namjoon practically slammed the phone down back on his desk, anger crashing over him like a tidal wave. how dare jeon jungkook show up, uninvited and unprompted to his own company, and then proceed to mock him like some entitled brat? namjoon resisted the urge to slam his hand down on his desk in pure anger, and instead took a deep, bracing breath in an attempt to calm himself.

   “what did you just do, kook? he’s not going to forget that, you know.” you said, surprised at how even your tone was. said male scoffed. “believe me, i know. your boss is the type to hold grudges for a long time.” taehyung’s cerulean eyes narrowed in suspicion. “how would you know that?” jungkook sighed, the tension in his shoulders loosening a bit. “we used to be friends, a long time ago.” you could’ve sworn the noise in the room got sucked out at the sudden revelation.

 “what?” you blanched, while hoseok and taehyung just looked on curiously. jungkook’s lips curled up in a bitter smile. “it’s shocking, i know, me being friends with an asshole like him, but before our falling out, your boss wasn’t all that bad, i guess.”

 “care to elaborate?” taehyung blurted, and hoseok smacked him lightly on the shoulder. jungkook bit back a laugh, shaking his head slightly.

 “it’s okay, hyung, i don’t mind, besides, you guys are my friends and deserve to know what happened between your boss and i years ago.”

   jungkook took a deep breath, exhaling softly before he spoke, ignoring the racing of his heart as he began to relieve memories that had been lingering in the back of his mind for years.

   spring 2013

  jungkook bounced nervously on his heels, awaiting his interview. he adjusted his tie for what seemed like the millionth time that hour, making sure not a strand of his hair was out of place, and that his blazer and button down weren’t wrinkled, even though he knew his mom had ironed them to perfection.

 they’d just moved to seoul two weeks ago, and after things had gotten settled at their new house, his mom insisted that he start at the local academy as soon as possible. jungkook was beyond nervous, as he’d heard that the students at the academy were extremely intelligent. jungkook was scared that he wouldn’t live up to their expectations and be kicked out immediately, but since the school had called him for an interview, he hoped that there was a chance they’d consider him for enrollment.

  suddenly, the door to the nearby classroom opened, causing jungkook to jump in surprise, and a tall male stepped out, who looked no older than nineteen, dressed in a school uniform that was well-tailored, as the pants molded to his long legs perfectly.

  said male greeted him with a polite, friendly smile, and jungkook couldn’t help but notice the dimples that were indented in his cheeks. “you must be jeon jungkook, correct?” he asked, and his voice was deep yet soft.

 “y-yes, that’s me.” jungkook stammered, bowing awkwardly. “nice to meet you.” the tall male chuckled, waving off his politeness. “there’s no need to be formal, after all, i am not that much older than you. how old are you, if you don’t mind me asking?”

 “f-fifteen.” the male smiled, dimples indented in his cheeks, humming in acknowledgement. “ok, jungkook, follow me.” he said, and jungkook took a deep breath before following the male into the classroom.

 the classroom was spacious, with desks arranged in neat rows, and the chalkboard behind the tall male was pristine. the room also had a bookshelf in the corner, full of classics and even romance novels. at the front of the room, a large desk took up a third of the space, and the male who’d greeted him was sitting behind it, in the process of slipping on a pair of glasses, which made him look even more intelligent.

  “i’m so sorry, i realized that i had forgotten to introduce myself. i’m kim namjoon, but you can just call me namjoon if you like.” namjoon smiled, dark brown eyes kind, and jungkook felt the tension in his shoulders loosen.

  “n-nice to meet you namjoon.” jungkook mumbled, hating how meek and soft he sounded, but namjoon didn’t seem to mind, as he just laughed softly.

  “there’s no need to be nervous, i know that the school looks a bit intimidating, but once you’re actually a student, it’s not as bad as you think.” namjoon’s smile was so open and reassuring that jungkook couldn’t help but return it with a grin of his own.

   “wait, so you went to the same high school?” you blurted, and jungkook nodded, a sad smile tugging at his lips. “yeah, we did, and that’s actually how we became friends. he interviewed me when i came in for the admission interview, and two days later, i found out that i got accepted. when we first met, he had this aura about him that just screamed reassuring and friendly, and i guess i got fooled by that. we were close for a while, a year at most, and then i met jieun, and when i went to tell namjoon that we were together, i thought he’d be supportive, but he-” jungkook’s voice cracked, tears welling up in his eyes, and you immediately ran over, throwing your arms around him and rubbing comforting circles on his back as jungkook’s body shook with soft sobs.

  you shushed jungkook and stroked his hair gently, heart aching at the broken sobs that emitted from him. you felt a small surge of anger at namjoon for making jungkook feel this way, and hugged the latter tighter, while hoseok and taehyung looked on in concern.

  after jungkook’s tears had subsided, he gently pulled away from your embrace, sniffling and wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. “sorry for getting tear stains on your shirt.” he croaked, chuckling softly, and you waved off his apology. “it’s fine, kook, don’t worry about it.”

  “wait, so caused the falling out, if you don’t mind me asking, that is.” taehyung mumbled, color blooming on his cheeks, and jungkook smiled weakly. “it’s alright, like i said, you are my friends and deserve to know what happened and why we are constantly at each other’s throats.”

  you carefully sat jungkook down on your office chair, to which he gave you a small, grateful smile, and exhaled softly.

   fall 2014

  jungkook felt his heart pound rapidly against his chest as he bounded up the stairs to the school. jieun had finally admitted that she liked him back, after a semester of mutual pining, and now they were happily dating, and jungkook couldn’t wait to tell namjoon the great news.

 he found said male at his locker, in the process of shoving textbooks into his backpack, and jungkook couldn’t contain the grin that spread across his face as he drew closer.

  “hey hyung!” he beamed, and the older male turned to look at him, chuckling amusedly. “why are you so chipper today, kook? something happen?” namjoon asked as he slid his philosophy textbook, which was about half the size of a dictionary into his worn blue backpack.

  “jieun and i are dating! last week, she finally admitted that she likes me back! isn’t that great?” jungkook blurted, and immediately, the warm smile from namjoon’s face faded, quickly replaced with one of disbelief.

 “what did you just say?” namjoon said, voice deadly calm, and jungkook furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, wondering why the older didn’t seem as happy as he thought he would.

 “jieun and i are dating?” he repeated, and jungkook flinched as the older nearly took his locker door off its hinges as he slammed it shut.

  “how could you?” namjoon hissed, and jungkook immediately felt dread pooling in his stomach. “i-i don’t understand, why are you being like this?” namjoon laughed bitterly. “you know, for someone so smart, you can be quite dense sometimes.” jungkook’s heart was pounding wildly against his chest as namjoon just looked at him with unreadable eyes.

  a blanket of silence fell over them, and jungkook’s mind raced for an explanation as to why his friend was acting so strangely. then, after some agonizing seconds, it hit him like a punch to the solar plexus. “y-you like j-jieun, don’t you?” namjoon clapped in mock admiration, chuckling darkly.

  “glad you finally realized it, jungkook.” namjoon sneered, and jungkook flinched at the uncharacteristic coldness in the older’s voice. “i-i can break up with her, i-” he was cut off my namjoon shaking his head, a bitter smile spreading across his face.

  “don’t bother jungkook, because i know you, and you’re just going to crawl back to her anyway because you’d feel guilty about hurting her.” and with that, namjoon slung his backpack over his shoulder and without looking back at him, turned on his heels and walked away, leaving jungkook with a heavy heart.

   “seriously? the guy got so worked up over you dating the girl he likes? i know it sucks, but you can’t get all that you want in life, doesn’t he know that?” hoseok grumbled, throwing his hands up in exasperation, and jungkook laughed softly.

 “i don’t blame him for reacting the way he did, i mean, if i were in the same position as him, i’d probably be pissed off too.” jungkook admitted, and leaned back against the chair, body slumping in exhaustion. “but he could’ve also tried to be supportive instead of turning on you immediately like that.” you seethed, and jungkook reached over and placed a calming, reassuring hand on your shoulder. “it’s ok, y/n, please don’t go after him. i can’t risk you losing your job because of me.” he mumbled, and your heart ached at the sadness in his voice.

 “but he-” jungkook shook his head, cutting you off abruptly. “it’s not worth the risk.” “and you wanna know the sad part about all of this? even though i resent him for lashing out at me, some part of me is still holding on to the slight hope that we’ll be able to reconcile one day.” jungkook confessed, smiling sadly.

  you threw your arms around jungkook again, pulling him into a fierce and tight hug, to which he leaned into, burying his face in the crook of your shoulder. “i’m sorry for dumping all my baggage into your lives like this.” jungkook sniffled, voice slightly muffled by the thin fabric of your blouse, and hoseok and taehyung shook their heads. “kook, we are your friends, dumping baggage into each others’ lives is what we do.” taehyung said, slight humor in his tone, but you could tell that he was sincere, and you looked at him over jungkook’s shoulder and gave him a grateful smile.

     jungkook stumbled into his apartment hours later, feeling as if a weight had been lifted off his chest. he felt so relieved and almost at ease for finally telling his friends the truth about why namjoon and him hated each other so much. and while it’d been painful to relive the painful memories, he was glad that his closest friends knew.

  jungkook sighed, undoing his tie and throwing it onto an empty chair, his gray suit jacket joining it, and padded over to the bathroom to take a much needed shower.

 minutes later, jungkook emerged from the bathroom, feeling refreshed and more comfortable in a loose shirt and sweatpants, drying his hair with a towel. he hung it on the hook on the bathroom door before practically collapsing onto his bed, sighing in relief.

  the day had been exhausting, more so than usual, and after he’d spilled his heart out to his friends just hours ago, jungkook was in much need of sleep.

  his phone buzzed, snapping him out of his thoughts, and jungkook groaned tiredly as he reached over and grabbed it from the nightstand, squinting slightly as his eyes adjusted to the bright screen in front of him.

  his heart skipped a beat when he saw that he’d gotten a text from you, and immediately scolded himself. stop acting like a middle school boy with a crush, he thought.

 hey, i just wanted to make sure that you’re okay, you know, after all that happened today.

 i’m fine, he typed, just a little tired, that’s all.

 get some rest kook. also, can you come over tomorrow?

 jungkook ignored the way his heart sped up at that, and typed out a reply.

  yeah, of course. is everything ok?

  everything’s fine, i just thought we could have a movie night again, you know, like last time.

 jungkook felt his face grow hot at the memory of you falling asleep on his couch, and when you had emerged from the guest bedroom in nothing but the sweater he’d lent you, it had taken all the self-restraint in him not to blush.

  ok, sounds great! want me to bring over some chicken and beer?

 hell yes! you know i’m always down for chicken and beer :)

 jungkook chuckled softly, sent a smiley emoji in response, and carefully placed his phone back  on the nightstand. yawning, he crawled underneath the covers and drew them tight around his body, feeling sleep overtake him.

   namjoon was still reeling from the day’s events when yoongi knocked on his front door. sighing, he went to answer it, not bothering to say hello as the younger moved past him, clutching a bag full of takeout from that restaurant not too far from his house, along with two bottles of soju.

  later, when the food was laid out on the massive coffee table that took up a third of namjoon’s living room, yoongi finally asked him why he’d been acting so strange lately.

namjoon carefully laid his chopsticks down before replying. “it’s jungkook.” yoongi’s dark eyes widened almost interceptibly, the only sign he was surprised. “what about him?” he said, shoving a handful of rice in his mouth, causing namjoon wrinkle his nose in slight disgust.

  “he showed up at the company today, unannounced and told me that he offered y/n a job.” yoongi nearly choked on a piece of samgyeopsal. “what?” he coughed, and namjoon held out a bottle of water that he’d grabbed from the fridge earlier, and yoongi took it immediately, uncapping it and taking a long swig.

  “he had the nerve to say that to me, over the phone, of all things.” namjoon grumbled, picking up his chopsticks and shoving a piece of pork in his mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

 “are we talking about the same jeon jungkook? that wide eyed kid who practically worshipped the ground you walked on in high school?” namjoon sighed, managing a small nod.

 yoongi let out a low whistle. “damn, this kid’s got some guts.” “more like a death wish.” namjoon muttered, taking a long sip of soju, letting the bitterness burn his throat. “how long has it been?” yoongi asked, downing the rest of his soju. “i don’t know, five years?” namjoon pondered, and then leaned back on the couch, sighing.

  “it’s been nearly five years, joon, i mean, know what happened sucked, but the kid isn’t together with her anymore. besides, don’t you think you two have been at each other’s throats for too long? it’ll take time, but jungkook’s a good kid, he’s just trying to figure out how to cope with the pent up hatred he’s habored for you for years, that’s all.” yoongi said that last part casually, shrugging nonchalantly, as if he’d just talked about the weather. namjoon didn’t reply, just reached for his abandoned bottle of soju and downed the rest.

    taehyung munched happily on his bowl of popcorn as goblin flashed across the flat screen that had been bought with hoseok’s first paycheck, heavily engrossed in the drama. the latter, however, seemed distracted, as per usual, and because he didn’t want to pry, taehyung pretended not to notice how hoseok barely touched his popcorn, not bothering to focus on the show at hand.

  finally, after a long stretch of silence between them, taehyung, without looking away from the tv, awkwardly cleared his throat. “something on your mind, hyung?” hoseok jumped, as if taehyung had bit him, and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “ah, it’s really not that important.” he mumbled, and taehyung rolled his eyes, reaching for the remote and reluctantly pausing his drama, turning to look at the older male.

 “alright, what is it?” hoseok sighed, as if knowing that trying to hide his feelings was useless. “i don’t know, honestly. what jungkook told us has been stuck in my head all day. i feel like he left something out.” taehyung resisted the urge to roll his eyes. instead, he said as gently as he could, “what do you mean?” “well, i don’t know, i guess i just have an inkling that jungkook didn’t tell us the whole story, like he left some parts out. like how did he realize that our boss liked his ex? or that he was even interested in her? or why didn’t namjoon say anything to jungkook about liking her?”  

  taehyung let out an amused laugh. “what?” hoseok muttered, color blooming on his cheeks, and the former grinned. “do you want to interrogate him or something?” “n-no, i just feel like there’s more to what jungkook told us, you know?” taehyung hummed in agreement. “yeah, i see where you’re coming from, i mean, jungkook’s a private person, so he usually keeps things like that under wraps. i bet it was difficult for him to tell us what happened, so maybe jungkook left some stuff out because he didn’t feel ready to reveal the whole truth.” he added with a shrug, and hoseok just slumped down onto the couch, feeling defeated.

    jungkook braced himself as he walked into work the next day, hoping jimin wouldn’t strangle him or worse, and hesitantly made his way over to his secretary’s desk, rocking back and forth on his heels nervously.

  jimin didn’t bother to look up from the pile of paperwork on his desk as he greeted him. “good morning, sir.” he said, tone unfailingly polite as always, but jungkook could hear the slight annoyance in it. “look, jimin, i’m sorry for the way i’ve acted lately. i know it was reckless and i let my anger get the better of me. feel free to yell at me or whatever. i know i deserve it.”

 jungkook waited for the stern lecture and harsh words, which otherwise never came. instead, jimin merely sighed, finally looking up from the papers on his desk, dark brown eyes glimmering with unshed tears. “you’re right, you do deserve it, in fact, i should yell at you right now. but, i guess i have to apologize to you too.”

 jungkook felt his eyes widen in shock. “apologize for what?” he asked, sounding as confused as he felt, and jimin took a deep, bracing breath. “i overheard the conversation you had with y/n and her friends.” jungkook blanched. “what? how? you weren’t there.” jimin shook his head sadly. “no, i was, you just didn’t see me.” “you followed me?” jungkook breathed.

  “i was just making sure that you weren’t going to something reckless again, and you did!” jimin was yelling now, and thankfully, the rest of the employees pretended not to notice, feigning interest in their daily tasks. “why the fuck did you call namjoon and threaten him like that, with witnesses of all things! do you know how much the media would love to report on shit like that if word got out? your reputation will be tainted, and i will have to try and save your sorry ass. i will have to spend all night calling every single news station in korea to beg them to not publish the articles and talk about it! do you know how much stress i’m under as your secretary? i feel like a glorified babysitter half the time because i’m so worried that you’re going to fuck up again! i hate seeing you suffer, so why do you make it difficult for me?” jimin sobbed, tears streaming down his pale cheeks, and jungkook felt like the biggest asshole in the universe at the sight.

   “i know you were trying to protect y/n and all, but you should’ve just let her go with namjoon. it would’ve saved me the headache.” jimin went on, managing a bitter laugh through tears, and jungkook winced.

  jungkook hesitantly walked over to jimin, swallowing against the bile in his throat, and placed a hand on his shoulder, causing the latter to flinch, but he didn’t try to brush it off.

 “look, i know i’ve been quite the asshole lately, and i’m sorry for that. my emotions have gotten the better of me, and going after namjoon was the last thing i should’ve done. but i couldn’t have let y/n go with namjoon, god knows what would’ve happened if i did. i’m sorry for always making you look after me like child who can’t go two seconds without doing some stupid shit. you’ve put up with me all these years, and i’m so grateful for all that you’ve done for me.” jungkook placated gently, and jimin sniffled, looking up at him with watery, puffy eyes.

  “why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye?” jimin whispered, voice slightly shaky, and jungkook gave the former a sad smile. “you’re probably going to hate me after this, but i’m-” before he could finish, jimin had flung himself into his arms, causing jungkook to stumble back a bit as he tried to steady himself.

  “don’t you dare finish that sentence, jeon jungkook, or i swear to god i will break your legs.” jimin scolded half-heartedly, and jungkook chuckled softly. “does this mean you forgive me?” jungkook whispered, hugging the other male tight, he felt jimin let out an amused laugh.

 “of course, you asshole, why do you think i’m putting my pride behind and hugging you?” he joked, and jungkook rolled his eyes. “then let go then.” jungkook mumbled, and jimin looked up, shooting him an icy glare. “jeon jungkook, shut the fuck up and let me hug you, and if anyone thinks you’re gay after this, i will personally walk up to them and politely inform them that you are by far the straightest male i have ever had the displeasure of meeting.” jimin hissed, wrapping his small arms around jungkook’s waist, hugging him tight, and the latter huffed a laugh at his empty threat.

 “even though you’re a pain in my ass, the thought of working for someone else is well-” “unbearable?” jungkook grinned as he handed jimin a water bottle.

 jimin snorted as he took a long swig of water. “in you dreams, jeon.” he mumbled, and jungkook laughed. the former sighed in mock exasperation. “now, if you’ll excuse me, i have to go through a shit ton of documents.” jimin gave a mocking bow as he sauntered out of jungkook’s office, and the latter rolled his eyes.

    you practically fell back against the soft couch cushions of jungkook’s living room couch, trying not to spill the bowl of popcorn in your lap as you laughed. jungkook was telling you about the way jimin had started yelling at him, crying, and then practically threw himself at him, as he put it, and you had burst into a fit of giggles as you imagined the sight.

  “that’s so cute, so he just pulled you into a manly embrace after he yelled at you?” you teased, and quickly dodged the piece of popcorn that jungkook threw at your head. “shut up, there was nothing manly about it, he was like a weeping teenage girl who’d just broken up with their ex.”

 you snorted. “jimin’s always been the one for dramatics, you know.” jungkook huffed a laugh. “tell me about it, i nearly cracked my head open when he suddenly hugged me like that, i could’ve hit my head on his desk.” he muttered, shoving a handful of popcorn in his mouth, causing you to wrinkle your noise in slight disgust.

 “what?” jungkook asked through a mouthful of said popcorn, and you playfully shoved him on the shoulder. “you’re so gross, you know that? did you parents teach you, i don’t know, manners?” you scolded half-heartedly, and jungkook rolled his eyes. “please, my parents were too busy trying to keep the company from going bankrupt that teaching me proper decorum was the last thing on their minds.” “did you just say proper decorum?” you asked, letting out a disbelieving laugh, and color bloomed on jungkook’s face.

 “yeah, and? what about it?” he said sulkily, and you bit back a smile as you reached out and ruffled his hair affectionately, the strands soft against your skin, causing jungkook to stick his tongue out at you like a little child.

  “no reason, you just sounded so pretentious.” you joked, and jungkook pouted. “i am not pretentious, you take that back.” he whined, and you couldn’t help but laugh. “i’m sorry kook, it’s just so fun to mess with you.” jungkook pretended to dry a fake tear, slumping down onto his couch. “you wound me. y/n, i thought we were friends.” he sobbed, and you rolled your eyes in mild exasperation.

 “ok, ok, you big baby, i was just teasing you.” you placated gently, wrapping an arm around jungkook’s shoulders, pulling him closer to you. said male sniffled and leaned his head on your shoulder, soft blond hair tickling your neck, and you smiled.

   the next day, you took a deep breath before knocking softly on namjoon’s door, bracing yourself as you swung it open and hesitantly stepped inside. you hadn’t spoken to him in days, and constantly avoiding him wasn’t going to help anything, and thus why you were now standing awkwardly a few feet away from his desk, fidgeting nervously with the thin gold bracelet on your wrist.

  “y/n, what brings you to my office? i don’t think i asked anything of you.” namjoon said, tone neither angry nor sarcastic, just deadly calm, and that alone made you even more nervous.

  “i’m well aware of that sir, but i just wanted to apologize.” one of namjoon’s perfectly shaped eyebrows rose in question. “what for, exactly?” he asked, and you were taken aback by how genuinely curious he sounded, and waved the thought away. don’t be ridiculous, you thought. he’s probably just trying to get a rise out of you, like he always does. you reminded yourself as you exhaled softly, squaring your shoulders.

  “for not informing you of my sudden absence a few days ago and for everything that happened afterwards. i’m sure i caused you a lot of stress, and i apologize sincerely for that. it won’t happen again, and i’m sorry for how imcomptent i’ve been.” you atoned, the words tasting bitter in your mouth, but you forced what you hoped was an apologetic smile on your face, awaiting namjoon’s response.

   the silence in the room was deafening as the minutes seemed to trickle by slowly, and you couldn’t help but rock back and forth on your heels, fidgeting nervously with the thin chain of the dainty necklace that dangled at your throat, the metal cool between your fingers.

  finally, after an unbearable amount of silence, namjoon awkwardly cleared his throat, snapping you out of your trance. “i’m glad that you had the decency to apologize.” immediately, you felt that familiar surge of anger course through you at how condescending he sounded. “excuse me?” you croaked, and namjoon rolled his eyes. “you didn’t bother to show up for work, then you practically avoid me, and worst of all, you left work to go fuck around with that brat.” he snarled, and you curled your hand into a fist, knuckles turning white.

 for the past nine years you’d worked for him, you had always refrained from speaking your mind in fear of getting fired. you hated not speaking up for those poor employees that got yelled at for a small mistake or even for just looking at him, hated that you’d been so scared of an asshole like the man in front of you.

  you hated how he’d talk down to other businessman as if they were lesser than him, and the way he’d practically look down on certain people. most of all, you hated the way he was currently referring to jungkook, who was the sweetest, most loving guy you’d ever met, unlike the complete prick sitting before you.

  fuck this, fuck him, you thought, anger coursing through you. you’d held back from saying anything these past nine years, but enough was enough. “don’t you dare speak him of that way.” you hissed, and felt your blood run cold at the patronizing laugh that rumbled out of namjoon’s throat.

 “oh? and why shouldn’t i? he’s not your boyfriend, is he?” he sneered, and you gritted your teeth in annoyance. “no, he’s not, and even if he was, does that matter?” namjoon had the audacity to scoff. “it doesn’t, but that doesn’t mean i approve of you fucking around with the brat.”

  “i am not sleeping with him or whatever it is you’re implying. do you really think that lowly of me? that i’m some whore? is that what you see me as?” you seethed, trying to keep your voice as even and calm as possible. the smugness on namjoon’s face quickly turned into one of genuine surprise, and you couldn’t help but feel a bit satisfied.

  “i hate to disappoint,” you drawled, tone dripping with fake politeness. “i’m not the whore you think i am. jungkook and i have never been romantically involved, and even if we were, it is none of your business. i’m fucking exhausted of having to look after your pathetic ass all the damn time. for fucks sake, you can’t even tie your shoes properly! you know, for someone so intelligent, you do seem to be lacking in the manners and personality department.” you sneered, and couldn’t help but smirk in satisfication at the way namjoon’s face paled slightly.

  “jungkook is my friend, and i will not tolerate you slandering him. how dare you talk about him like he’s some spoiled brat? you don’t even know how hard he’s worked to get to where he is today. you, on the other hand, grew up with a gold spoon in your mouth,am i right?” you taunted, and saw namjoon’s jaw clench slightly.

  “now, if you’ll excuse me, i have important things to attend to, sir.” you snapped, and before namjoon could do or say anything, you turned on your heel and stormed out of the room, not bothering to look over your shoulder to see his reaction.

   as soon as you reached the safety of your desk, you reached up and clutched at your chest, letting out a deep breath, trying to soothe your pounding heart. hoseok looked over with wide, curious eyes, mouthing, “what happened? are you okay?” you gave him a small, confirming nod, and gestured that you needed water.

  said male immediately got up and snatched a bottle of water from taehyung’s desk, ignoring the cry of protest from the latter, and handed it to you. you gave taehyung an apologetic look as you uncapped the water bottle and took a long swig of it.

   “i finally confronted him.” taehyung’s cerulean eyes widened. “you what?” you sighed, leaning back in your chair. “it’s kind of a long story. i decided that avoiding him wouldn’t solve anything, and when i apologized, he insulted jungkook and i, and i couldn’t take it anymore, so i might’ve snapped.” hoseok let out a low whistle. “well shit, y/n, i never thought i’d see the day.” he admitted, and taehyung nodded in agreement.

  “me too, i mean, i remember when you were still an intern and could barely make eye contact with him.” taehyung mused, and you felt your face flush scarlet. “shut up, it was my first day and i was a nervous wreck. besides, i didn’t even think he’d consider me as his secretary.”

  “so, what are you going to do? did he fire you?” taehyung blurted, and hoseok smacked him lightly on the shoulder, hissing at him to shut up, and you couldn’t help but laugh in amusement. i’Ill just continue to work here until he decides that he’s had enough of me.” hoseok reached out and squeezed your shoulder reassuringly. “well, just know that tae and i are always here for you.” you gave him a grateful smile in return.

    yoongi eyed his longtime friend curiously, looking for any signs of distress, and the only telltale sign was the slight clenching of his jaw. “what’s gotten your panties in a twist today?” he asked nochalantly, and namjoon let out a long, suffering sigh. “you seem to be more on edge than usual.” yoongi commented, and the aforementioned male winced slightly.

 “yeah, is it that obvious?” yoongi shrugged, taking a long sip of red wine. “not really, i just noticed because you know, it’s not like we’ve been friends for almost eleven years or anything.” he mumbled, and namjoon rolled his eyes at the slight sarcasm in his voice.

  “it’s y/n.” he said finally, and yoongi raised a curious brow. “really? again?” “she’s been inconveniencing me these days.” namjoon grumbled, and yoongi bit back a smirk. “how so?” the former sighed, crossing his long legs over the other as he swirled the wine in his glass.

  “she’s been avoiding me, and today, we had a little disagreement.” namjoon mumbled, taking a long sip of his wine, and sat back in his armchair, shoulders tense. “little? from the way she stormed out of your office, i don’t think it was just some petty arguement.” yoongi said thoughtfully, and namjoon sighed in exasperation. “i hate that you can tell how i’m really feeling.” yoongi let out a light chuckle, despite the situation. “yeah, well, when you’ve been friends with someone for nearly eleven years, you tend to pick up on a few things.”

  “i’d never seen her that upset. sure, she’s gotten stressed over running late to a meeting or an email, but she just….” namjoon trailed off, gently drumming his fingers on his wine glass, a soft tinkling echoing in the living room, and yoongi titled his head, considering.

  “snapped?” yoongi interjected, and namjoon gave him a small nod. “yeah, i guess, in a way. she yelled at me, even.” yoongi hid a grin at the thought of you yelling at the latter. though he’d never formally met you, he’d always admired you for constantly putting up with namjoon’s bullshit, and  found it amusing how stubborn you could be.

   “so, what, she just yelled at you for no reason?” yoongi asked, clearing his throat awkwardly to hide the amused laugh that was threatening to burst out of him, and namjoon winced.

  “well, not exactly, you see, i may have insulted her and jungkook.” yoongi groaned in exasperation and pinched the bridge of his nose. “are you kidding me, joon? can you really not be nice for like five seconds? what’d she even say that made her get all pissy at you anyway?”

 namjoon grimaced as he recalled the harsh words he’d uttered you without a second thought, as he’d been blinded by his anger and annoyance at jungkook. “she actually came into my office to apologize for her sudden absence and for not informing me about it, and then i accused her of skipping work to hang out with jungkook, and i-i may have, called her a whore, without even meaning to.” he mumbled, barely audible but just enough for yoongi to hear, feeling his face grow hot with embarrassment.

 at first, yoongi said nothing, and the silence in the room was deafening. the raven haired male simply reached for the half empty bottle of wine on the table next to him, pouring the rest of its contents into his glass. yoongi swirled the contents inside for an agonizing minute or two, and namjoon fidgeted awkwardly in his seat, the leather cool against his bare arms.

  after what seemed like forever, yoongi calmly finished the rest of his wine, setting the now empty glass on the table next to him, regarding him cooly. “so, let me get this straight, you practically insulted your secretary and jungkook, and then she yelled at you?” namjoon fought the embarrassed blush that threatened to creep onto his cheekbones, and managed a weak nod.

  yoongi sighed, sounding merely exhausted, and ran a hand through his disheveled hair. “joon, i know that this is probably the last thing you want to hear from me right now, but you can’t just say things like that and expect her to just ignore it. i know you and jungkook aren’t exactly the best of friends, but it’s obvious that y/n is super close with him. so, honestly, i think the best thing to do would be to apologize, and then try and go a little easier on her, yeah? i mean she’s worked for you for you nine years, can’t you give her a little leniency?”

  namjoon pursed his lips tightly as he pondered yoongi’s suggestion. while that was the last thing he wanted to do, it seemed like the most practical, and he did consider himself to be a practical man. he sighed, knowing that this was a battle that would never end unless he put a stop to it somehow.

  “i-i don’t know how to apologize.” namjoon admitted, feeling his face grow hot with shame, and didn’t dare look yoongi in the eye, instead focusing on the white carpeting of his living room. yoongi sighed. “do you really not know how to say sorry to someone?” namjoon shook his head, feeling as if he were to shrink into himself at any moment, and after a few beats of silence, yoongi said “i’ll help you”, and namjoon barely felt himself nod in acknowledgement as he stared off into space.

   you sat curled up with hoseok, taehyung, and jungkook on your living room couch, feeling defeated and a little exhausted from the day’s events. hoseok had cooked kimchi fried rice and ordered samgyeopsal to go along with it, and the three of you were now lounging on your couch, lost in thought.

  “why does everyone look so exhausted?” jungkook asked, concern furrowing his brow. hoseok sighed, running a hand through his disheveled hair. “namjoon happened.” he mumbled, and immediately, jungkook’s expression morphed into a mixture of annoyance and anger.

  “what’d that prick do this time?” he hissed. as hoseok filled him in on what happened, you watched as jungkook’s shoulders tensed with every word, and resisted the urge to run over and throw your arms around him.

  “what an asshole. he really has no consideration for others.” jungkook seethed, curling his hands into the leather of the couch. his dark brown eyes softened as he fixed his gaze on you. “i’m so sorry he said those things to you.” you waved away his apology. “it’s fine, i’m honestly used to him being an asshole on the daily, so how he acted didn’t surprise me in the slightest.”

  taehyung huffed, slumping further down on the couch. “still though, it doesn’t excuse the fact that he practically insulted you and jungkook.” said male scoffed. “please, it’s not the first time i’ve been called an entitled brat or whatever insult he comes up with.”

  “still, though, why does he have to be so……” hoseok trailed off. “condescending? jungkook supplied, and the former nodded. “exactly.” “did your relationship with jieun really affect him that badly?” taehyung asked, and jungkook laughed bitterly. “i guess, since he got pissed off enough to end our friendship and push me out of his life.”

  you glared at taehyung, who immediately held his hands up in mock surrender, cerulean eyes alight with fear, and you sighed, shifting your gaze to jungkook, who just looked plain exhausted, and gave him a sympathetic smile, to which he returned with a small grin of his own.

  hoseok, sensing the tension in the room, clapped his hands, the loud noise echoing in your small apartment, and plastered a bright smile on his face. “so, how about we forget about all this depressing shit and get drunk off our asses instead, yeah?” jungkook smiled, a real, genuine one this time, eyes crinkling at the corners, dark brown eyes twinkling with mirth. “why not?”

   hours later, jungkook was close to getting a migraine, head pounding, and very much tipsy, insides practically buzzing with soju, stumbling slightly every time he took a step, struggling to stay upright. he knew that the hangover the following day would be hell, but at the moment, jungkook couldn’t bring himself to care. he usually didn’t drink, especially on a work night, but after the day’s events, all jungkook wanted to do was drink until his mind felt numb. while it was the least practical thing to do, the last thing he wanted to be right now was practical.

  jungkook stumbled into your small kitchen, barely managing to keep his eyes open as he did, gripping the marble counter next to him tightly, willing the world to stop spinning. out of his peripheral vision, he could see hoseok and taehyung passed out on the couch, soft snores escaping their mouths, and you were passed out on a nearby armchair, cheeks flushed.

  he groaned and forced himself to walk over to the living room, blinking back exhaustion, and somehow collapsed onto the blue carpeted floor, feeling his body practically sigh in relief at the soft surface underneath him, jungkook let sleep pull him under minutes later.

    taehyung woke up with a migraine and to the bright sun shining in his eyes, causing him to groan and bury in his face in one of the couch cushions. his body felt like jelly and the migraine that was currently pounding in his head was going to bother him all day.

  sighing, he looked up from the cushion, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, and looked around the room. hoseok was passed out next to him, clothes and hair rumpled, snoring softly, jungkook was curled up on the floor, suit jacket thrown to the side carelessly, his feet bare, and you were asleep on a nearby armchair, blouse and skirt wrinkled, dark hair a wild mess.

  taehyung winced as he forced himself to sit up, ignoring the pounding headache he was currently sporting, and bent down to retrieve his suit jacket, which he’d probably removed at some point during the night, and shoved it on.

  he got up and padded over to the kitchen, legs feeling like concrete, and managed to pour himself a glass of water and finding the painkillers. taehyung groaned, opened the painkillers, popped one in his mouth, and gulped down the glass of water. after carefully putting the glass in the sink, taehyung trudged over to the living room to wake up his friends.

  taehyung started with hoseok, who was surprisingly easy to wake up, and made sure that his friend was up and taking painkillers before going to wake you. you groaned, fidgeting around in the chair, and taehyung couldn’t help but smile fondly.

 “y/n” he sing-songed, shaking you gently, and your eyes slowly fluttered open. “huh?” you mumbled sleepily, and taehyung chuckled. “headache?” he asked gently, and you shook your head slightly. “surprisingly, i don’t. there is a slight ache, but it’s nothing close to a migraine.”

 taehyung smiled, reaching out and ruffling your hair affectionately, telling you to go and freshen up, and you shot him a grateful smile as you disappeared up the small staircase that led to your room. sighing, he padded over to jungkook’s curled up form, nudging him slightly with his foot.

  “kook?” he whispered, and said male grunted in response. “get your ass up and take some painkillers. you look like shit.” taehyung joked, and jungkook slowly sat up, hand immediately reaching up to press at his temples, groaning. “how much did i drink last night? my head’s killing me.” taehyung shrugged. “beats me, i passed out before you. but judging by your current state, i’m guessing a lot?” jungkook sighed. “remind me never to drink again.” he mumbled, carefully standing up and awkwardly shuffling towards the kitchen to take some painkillers. taehyung rolled his eyes half-heartedly and went to prepare breakfast.

    hoseok sat at the kitchen island with you and taehyung on either side of him, and jungkook sitting at the very end, shoveling the pancakes that taehyung had made earlier into his mouth. you grimaced at the piece of pancake that stuck to his mouth afterwards, and hoseok rolled his eyes playfully. “didn’t your parents teach you, i don’t know proper table etiquette?” you joked, looking surprisingly refreshed for someone who’d just drank seven bottles of soju last night, and hoseok glared at you half-heartedly.

  “i’m hungry, okay? leave me alone.” hoseok grumbled, cheeks flushing with color, and taehyung giggled. “ah , you’re so cute hyung!” he beamed, and hoseok glared daggers at the younger. “call me cute one more time or i’ll cut your dick off.” he growled, and taehyung just smiled smugly in response.

  “would you two stop being at each other’s throat for at least a day? i swear, you idiots can’t go five minutes without wanting to bicker about the stupidest shit.” you scolded, but your tone held no heat, and taehyung snickered. “it’s how we show our love for one another.” hoseok supplied cheerfully, and you rolled your eyes. jungkook only looked on in amusement, holding back his laughter as he gulped down his glass of orange juice.

  “remind me to never drink that much again.” jungkook muttered as he gently set down his now empty glass and headed for the bathroom to freshen up, and hoseok couldn’t help but chuckle softly. “do you need more painkillers?” taehyung called after him, and jungkook waved a dismissive hand. “i’ll be fine.” he said over his shoulder, and disappeared into the bathroom, softly shutting the door behind him.

  as soon as he was gone, taehyung immediately leaned in, bracing his elbows on the counter, lowering his voice as if he were afraid someone would overhear. “so, what’s going on with you and jungkook?” you felt your cheeks burn as you scoffed. “tae, would you quit that? there’s nothing going on between us.” said male pouted. “but y/n, this is your chance to find true love!”

  you rolled your eyes fondly. “look, i appreciate that, but i don’t think he’s ready for another committed relationship, especially after jieun. besides, even if he was, i don’t think jungkook likes me in that way, and i’m not sure if i do either.”

  hoseok scoffed. “you two are the most oblivious people i’ve ever met. do you even know how jungkook looks at you? how smitten he looks?” you blanched. “i-” aforementioned male just held up a hand, cutting you off and sighing. “i get that you don’t want to pressure jungkook about him dating again, but i mean, it’s not like you’ve flirted with him or anything. you’ve respected that he was in a long-term relationship and gave him time to heal. and he’s also not trying to make any moves on you. and like taehyung said before, it’s been a while since you’ve dated y/n, i mean, you deserve to be happy, you know?”

  your heart warmed at how sincere he sounded, and moved forward to hug him. “thank you.” you mumbled into the soft fabric of his t-shirt, and hoseok chuckled softly, returning your embrace. “just telling the truth, no need to thank me.” after you pulled away, you let out a soft yawn and stretched. “i’m going to go get ready.” you mumbled and disappeared up the small set of stairs that led to your room a few seconds later.

   as taehyung moved to put his plate in the sink, hoseok blurted, “what was that about?” the former’s eyebrows furrowed with confusion. “what?” hoseok sighed inwardly. “why’d you ask y/n if there was something going on between her and jungkook? you know there’s not.”

 taehyung rolled his eyes. “oh that? you know i was just messing with her, right?” hoseok blanched. “i-” the former held up a hand, cutting him off. “look, i know that you don’t exactly approve of y/n dating a conglomerate or whatever, but jungkook’s a great guy. he’s sweet and would treat her the way she deserves. i don’t see why you’re so against it.”

  hoseok felt his face flush. “i never said i didn’t approve! i just…” he trailed off, and taehyung raised a curious brow. “just what?” hoseok sighed. “it’s nothing.” he mumbled, and taehyung didn’t look too convinced, but he didn’t press further, only gave a philosophical shrug and disappeared down the hall. hoseok, left alone with his thoughts, buried his face in his hands and groaned.

    namjoon didn’t bother to look up from the veritable mountain of papers on his desk, even as you placed yet another dictionary sized file in front of him, clearing your throat awkwardly. “do you need anything?” he shook his head minutely, and heard you bow slightly and walk out of his office, heels clicking on the smooth floor, the door closing softly but firmly behind you.

   as soon as you were gone, namjoon sighed, tossing the report he’d been reading off to the side of his desk, rubbing at his temples. his last conversation with yoongi had been all he could think about lately, and had gotten little to no sleep because of it. the older male had never been one to sugarcoat anything, as he was usually blunt and spoke his mind, which namjoon appreciated.

   however, though, yoongi’s advice this time around had been confusing and to namjoon, a little out of character for him, as the younger wasn’t usually one to have “deep” conversations and often took namjoon’s side when it came to disagreements. in fact, his advice had made him even more confused and conflicted than ever.

  unfortunately, yoongi was the only friend he had, as most of the people he interacted with usually thought of him as a conceited asshole and extremely intimidating. then, there was the irrevocably doomed friendship with jungkook, who had also made it clear that he had no intention of forgiving him for what occurred in the past. finally, there was his family, who he usually avoided contacting when he could help it.

  his parents weren’t exactly the worst, but they weren’t the best either. his mom had tried to be there for him, especially when he’d gotten kidnapped at age six and had had suffered from trauma, but had gotten too busy with work and often neglected him. next was his father, who hadn’t even made any attempts to have any sort of “normal” relationship with him, as work was the only thing he seemed to care about these days.

  then there were his siblings, who he hadn’t spoken to in years. aera, his older sister, was the head of an airline company in singapore, and had somehow managed to establish some sort of presence in said country, despite not being a native. she was kind, or at least, tried to be, tending to namjoon’s wounds when he’d fall from the swings at the nearby park, or when he’d trip and fall on his face, due to his clumsy nature. then, she’d gone off to college in europe, and had never come back. for all he knew, aera was probably lounging on the beach somewhere, sun-tanning.

  finally, there was his older brother, sung-ho, who he’d always had a rocky relationship with. when they’d ended up going to the same middle school, namjoon had always felt as if he were living in his brother’s shadow, coming in second during spelling bees or scoring lower in tests, teachers favoring sungho over him, always praising him with sweet words that dripped from their mouths like honey.

  on top of all that, his parents seemed to dote on him the most, making sure the best doctors took care of him when he’d get sick, and constantly fussing over him, giving him second helpings of food, and other things that namjoon longed for his parents to do for him.

  they might as well have acted as if namjoon was a complete stranger instead of their biological son, for he felt invisible during his entire childhood, and could only rely on himself. no one seemed to care that he was crumbling and that the trauma from that awful kidnapping had affected him greatly. namjoon blinked back tears as he curled his hands into fists, knuckles turning white, and wished he could just will himself away.

  that awful day still haunted him, and the terrible memories still lingered in the back of his mind, no matter how much namjoon tried to forget the incident entirely. namjoon took a deep, bracing breath, willing his hands to stop shaking, and finally let his tears fall.

   jimin sighed, running a hand through his disheveled hair as he typed out another email to the electronic company in spain, the text on his sleek computer screen a jumble of words.

 companies had been emailing him all day, demanding to know whether or not golden closet inc was going to invest in their products, and jimin was trying to assure them that their contracts would be sent to them soon, and that they only needed a few more days.

  jimin sighed tiredly and leaned back in his office chair, feeling his body practically wilt like a malnourished flower, and felt the ache in his neck pulse slightly. he was beyond exhausted, and wanted nothing more than to rush home and fall asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.

 unfortunately for him, jungkook had several meetings scheduled today, and as his secretary, jimin had to be there for all of them. and while he knew that jungkook would let him have the rest of the day off, no questions asked, jimin also knew that a part of him would feel guilty for leaving jungkook to deal with the narcissistic assholes that often attended said meetings, and would try to rush back to work anyway.

   jimin ignored the now dull ache in his neck as he stood, grabbing the thick manila folder of reports on his desk and heading to jungkook’s office, fighting back exhaustion. this time, he waited for the soft yet authoritative “come in” before swinging the door open and letting himself inside the enormous yet somewhat cozy space.

  jungkook was sat at his massive desk, flipping absentmindedly through a report, eyebrows scrunching together in concentration, a thin black pen in between his fingers. his blonde hair was a little disheveled and wind-swept, but the perfectly tailored gray suit he had on fit him like a glove.

  jimin sighed, walking over and placing the file he’d been holding gently on the desk. jungkook looked up from the report he’d been reading, a gentle smile tugging at his mouth. “morning, jimin.” he beamed. jimin narrowed his eyes in suspicion at the strangely chipper tone in the former’s voice.

  “why are you so hyper today?” jimin blurted, and bit back a smirk when color bloomed onto jungkook’s face. “i-i might’ve gotten drunk last night and was trying to play it off as if the hangover i’m currently going through isn’t killing me.” the latter mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, and jimin huffed a laugh, reaching into his pocket and placing some aspirin on his desk.

  “i could tell, you seemed really out of it this morning. i mean, you almost tripped over your own feet when you went to make some coffee earlier.” jungkook’s blush grew deeper as he grabbed the mug with said coffee in it and took a small sip. “shut up.” he muttered, and jimin chuckled softly.

  “where’d you even go last night anyway?” jimin asked nonchalantly as he put a pile of papers in a neat stack on jungkook’s desk, humming softly. “y/n’s apartment. and before you ask, it wasn’t just the two of us. hoseok hyung and tae were there too.” the latter supplied, and jimin gave a small nod in acknowledgement.

  “well, at least you’re still a pain in the ass, i guess.” jimin teased, and received a half-hearted glare in return. “get out.” jungkook scolded, but his tone held no anger, and jimin resisted the urge to burst out laughing as he gave a slight bow and exited the room.

    jungkook downed the rest of his coffee, grabbing the water bottle that he’d stolen from y/n’s apartment, popped some aspirin in his mouth, and grimaced as he gulped down said water bottle. wincing at the dull ache in his head, he threw the water bottle into the empty wastebasket beside his desk and sighed heavily.

   drinking in excess last night had proved to be one of the stupidest things jungkook had ever done in his life, aside from punching his former friend in the face twice. jungkook groaned as he remembered that he had a fuck ton of meetings that afternoon, and ran a hand through his hair, not caring if it got messier than it already was. he sighed inwardly and reached for the report he’d been reading. today’s going to be a long fucking day, jungkook thought miserably.

     you ignored the curious stares of your fellow employees as you went to make copies of the financial reports that namjoon had requested, the soft whirring of the machine filling the otherwise quiet room, and drummed your fingers softly on the table, humming softly.

  you weren’t sure why people had been giving you strange looks all morning, whispering to each other as if they were gossiping about a celebrity scandal, but you just chose to ignore them, for the matter was probably unimportant.

   you grabbed the copies off the printer and walked back to your desk, ignoring the hushed voices of everyone around you. hoseok shot you a concerned look, mouthing “everything ok?” and you nodded, giving him what you hoped was a convincing smile.

   hoseok didn’t look too convinced, however, but didn’t say anything, even as you got up and made your way to namjoon’s office, schooling your features into neutrality. once you were given the go ahead to come in, you swung the door open gently and shut it firmly behind you.

   you placed the copies on his desk, bowing slightly and moving away from it, making sure to put distance in between you and namjoon. said male scanned over the copies, expression unreadable, and gave you a slight nod, as if to say “thank you for not fucking this up.”

  you fought the urge to scoff as you turned on your heels and started to walk away, but stopped in your tracks when you heard a soft “wait.” “yes?” you asked over your shoulder, making sure to remain as nonchalant as possible. “i wanted to apologize.” namjoon blurted, and you sighed inwardly as you turned to face him.

  “for what, exactly?” “for how i’ve acted lately. i’ve been immature and rude and the things i said to you was not justified. i’m sorry for insulting you as well, that was extremely rude and out of line.” his tone seemed sincere, but because of how he’d treated you of late, you couldn’t help but feel extremely doubtful.

   you scoffed, and namjoon had the nerve to look hurt. “with all due respect, sir, you realty expect me to believe that your apology is not half-assed?” “i’m confused, what are you trying to say?” you rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest. “as intelligent as you are, you’re really dense sometimes, sir.” you drawled, fake politeness coating your voice, and namjoon’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

   “did you forget about how i’ve worked my ass off for you all these years? and how you practically dismissed me after i tried to have a mature conversation with you? and then you practically insult me and one of my friends. you expect me to just forgive you after all of the shit you constantly put me through?” you tried your best to keep calm, curling your hands into fists tightly, knuckles turning white.

   namjoon looked utterly speechless for once, and you bit back a satisfied smirk at the sight at the small victory. “have you been struggling? i know i’m not the best boss in the world, but you can let me know if you’re struggling or not. is the workload too much? or is the salary not enough? i can increase it-” “why would you care if i am or not?! you’re nothing but a narcissistic asshole who cares only about himself. i do all the bullshit you make me do, even if i have to lose sleep because of some stupid meeting!” you hissed, fighting back frustrated and angry tears. namjoon had the audacity and the nerve to look appalled. “what? surprised that i’m not confessing my love to you?” you sneered. “do you really think that?” think what?” “that i don’t care about you? that you’re just my secretary and nothing more?” his voice was surprisingly soft and gentle, sad even, but you refused to buy into his pathetic act. “yes, yes, i do.” you declared, refusing to break eye contact with him.

  namjoon’s expression was unreadable, and you could’ve sworn you saw unshed tears glimmer in his light brown eyes. “then maybe you should just leave, if you really hate me that much.” he suggested, tearing his gaze away from you and focusing on the pile of papers on his desk instead.

  you pursed your lips tightly, resisting the urge to get the last word in. instead, you turned on your heel and sauntered out of namjoon’s office, slamming the door behind you. you rushed over to your desk, shoving your belongings into your purse, frustrated tears stinging your eyes.

  out of the corner of your eye, hoseok and taehyung were looking at you with utter despair and worry on their faces, and you gave them what you hoped was a convincing smile, and didn’t bother to look back as you rushed out of the office, eager to get some fresh air.

     jungkook stretched, feeling his tired joints practically sigh with the movement, and slumped onto his office chair, mentally and physically from the long meeting he’d just endured. it’d been nothing but a waste of time and an excuse for asshole investors to complain about the simplest and most trivial things.

  jimin had tried his best to move things along quickly, politely telling the stuffy executives that jungkook still had other meetings to attend. they all responded with irritated glares, and jungkook wanted nothing more than to throw a chair at them. luckily, he’d been able to end the meetings earlier than expected, and thus no chairs were harmed.

  suddenly, his phone rang, interrupting him from his thoughts, and jungkook didn’t bother to check the caller id as he fished said device out of his suit pocket and put it to his ear. “hello?”  he mumbled tiredly. “jungkook?” it was taehyung, and he sounded uncharacteristically serious.

 “is something wrong? why do you sound so worried? did something happen?” jungkook asked, and he heard his friend take a long, slow breath before replying. “ let’s just say that when y/n went to drop off some files to namjoon, well, it didn’t go well.” taehyung mumbled, and jungkook immediately sat up straight, exhausation gone. “what’d that jerk do this time?” he inquired, trying to keep his voice as calm as possible, despite the anger that was pooling in his stomach.

   taehyung sighed, and jungkook could imagine the worried look on the former’s face. “he tried to apologize to her, and apparently y/n just… snapped. she started yelling at him and ran out of his office with tears streaming down her face. after that, she ran out, grabbed her stuff, and disappeared. i don’t know where she is, nor where she could’ve gone, and hoseok hyung and i are really worried. we assumed that she’d go to you, but judging from how you didn’t know what happened, i’m going to guess that you also don’t know where she is.”

  jungkook cursed softly under his breath, running a hand through his already disheveled hair, and told taehyung that he’d try and find you before hanging up quickly, along with a promise to text him if he was successful in doing so.

  he called jimin into his office, pacing back and forth while he waited, biting his lip anxiously. jungkook hoped that you had at least gone to a cafe nearby or something, and that you weren’t lying unconscious somewhere, or worse.

  he shook off the thought with a shudder, mentally scolding himself for thinking of worst-case scenarios almost immediately, and looked up as the door to his office swung open, and a confused but smiling jimin walked in.

  “did you need something, sir? you usually don’t call me at this hour, you’re usually sleeping or something.” jungkook ignored the light tease, and went on to explain what had happened, including the phonecall with taehyung, and jimin was pale-faced by the end of it.

  “i-is she okay?” he managed, trying to keep his voice as calm as possible, but jungkook could hear the slight undertone of worry and fear mixed in, and sighed. “i don’t know, not even hoseok hyung and taehyung know where she went.”

  jimin let out a soft stream of expletives that would’ve made his mother proud, and jungkook fought the urge to slump onto his desk and cry. “so, are you going to look for her? or do you want me to send out a search party?” jungkook fought the urge at the pure seriousness in jimin’s voice, for he knew that his secretary would do exactly that, with permission from him, of course. jungkook shook his head. “jimin, she didn’t get kidnapped, or at least , i hope she didn’t.” jimin winced slightly at that, and threw his hands up in exasperation.

 “then what the hell are we supposed to do now, then? wait for her to show up at your door or something? god, jungkook, what if she’s lying in a ditch somewhere or something?” jimin mumbled worriedly. jungkook took a deep, bracing breath. “here’s what we’re going to do.” jimin’s eyes lit up with hope and curiosity, and grumbled, “this better not be one of your stupid, risky plans or i will karate chop you.”

   you ducked into a cafe as soon as it had started raining, sighing as you stumbled into the warm space, the bitter smell of coffee  and the sweet smell of pastries invading your senses. you seated yourself at a booth towards the back, smiling politely as a waitress came by and gave you a cup of fresh coffee.

  you quickly rattled off your order to her when she asked for it, and as soon as the waitress was out of earshot, you buried your face into your hands and let out a soft sob. the soft pop music playing in the background did little to improve your mood, as the lyrics were melancholy and depressing.

  you weren’t sure where you were, for you had just hailed a cab and told the driver to take you to the farthest cafe he could find, and when you stumbled out of said cab with what felt like an hour later, you realized that you didn’t have a fucking clue where the driver had taken you.

  it was pathetic, you knew, to just run away like that, but you just couldn’t stand being in the same room as the guy you absolutely loathed, and the last words he said to you were still lingering in the back of your mind.

  you sniffled, removing your face from your hands and drying your tears with a napkin, just as the waitress came back with your order, which was a blueberry muffin and another cup of coffee. you managed to give the sweet-faced waitress a small smile, to which she returned with a bright grin of her own before she walked away and took her place behind the counter again.

   sighing, you dug your phone out of your purse and cursed softly under your breath when you saw all the missed calls and plethora of texts from hoseok, taehyung, and jungkook. they were all extremely worried and wanted to know where you were or if you’d been kidnapped, and you couldn’t help but laugh in slight amusement at their dramatics. your heart sunk down into your stomach when you thought of how worried and anxious you made them, and you carefully slipped your phone back into your purse with trembling hands.

   the soft chatter of the patrons in the small yet cozy cafe filled your ears as you sat back in your booth and let your mind wander. running off like that was guaranteed to get you fired, at most, and honestly, you couldn’t bring yourself to care. your boss was a piece of shit anyways, and while the pay was decent, there were a ton of opportunities that offered a lot more.

  however, the thought of leaving hoseok and taehyung stopped you from making that thought a reality. they were your only friends and some of the only guys who you trusted to take care of you when you drunk or tipsy, knowing that they would never try to take advantage of you. hoseok and taehyung were also some of the only people in your life who knew some of your deepest secrets and the sole witnesses of a dark time in college, when your professors were being pieces of shit and the assignments were getting to you, and they had comforted you, bringing you all your favorite snacks and watching all the cheesy rom coms with you.

    in short, you didn’t deserve their friendship, and while they constantly reminded you that it was the other way around, you knew that such was true. hoseok and taehyung had been there for you when no one else was, especially when your dad had passed away during you sophomore year of college, and you had spiraled immensely, and they were there to comfort you and hug for you hours on end, reminding you that you were brave and strong and that you would get through that period of grief. you smiled sadly to yourself as you remembered the late nights with the countless cartons of ice cream and takeout boxes, of the stupid jokes you’d shared and the shitty movies you watched.

    jungkook ignored the way his now ruined suit jacket clung to him as he ran through the torrent of rain. he decided to not take note of the pedestrians who were staring at him, probably wondering why one of the most influential figures in seoul was running, without an umbrella, no less, through a torrential downpour.  

 nothing mattered, all that did was finding you. after what seemed like hours, jimin was able to find your location, which was at a small cafe an hour out of seoul, and jungkook had wasted no time running out of his company and down the stairs that led to the parking garage, hopping into his car, starting it, and practically gunning it down the streets as he drove like a madman.

  jungkook broke three traffic laws, ran two redlights, and let out a stream of expletives that would’ve made jimin proud, and barreled down the streets of seoul, heart pounding wildly against his chest. all of that led him to his current state, soaked to the bone, expensive suit ruined, running through the streets like his life depended on it.

  his heart leapt with relief when he caught sight of you in the cafe window, seated in a booth towards the back, sipping calmly on a cup of coffee. jungkook practically tripped over his own feet as he went to open the door, and seconds later, he was standing at the cafe entrance, dripping wet with rain and breathing heavily, as if he’d ran a marathon.

   you stood up, eyes wide with shock, and jungkook wasted no time in marching over to you and pulling you into a tight embrace, wet clothes be damned, burying his face into the crook of your neck, breathing in the sweet smell of your perfume.

   “don’t you dare scare us like that again, jimin nearly had a heart attack when i told him what happened.” he grumbled half-heartedly, and felt you chuckle, your warm breath fanning out against his skin, the scent of coffee filling his nose. “i’m sorry kook, i just needed to get away from him.” you muttered, returning his embrace, ignoring the coldness of his soaked suit on your skin.

 jungkook squeezed your shoulder gently before pulling you, smiling sheepishly at you at your black blouse, which was now a little damp with rain, and you laughed, waving off his apology. “it’s fine, kook, don’t worry about it.” and said male grinned in response, shaking the water out of his hair softly.

  you huffed a laugh at jungkook carding his fingers through his hair as if that would get rid of the water entirely, and snagged a paper napkin from a nearby table, patting his hair dry. jungkook blushed profusely as you dried his hair, simply because of the close proximity.

   after all of that, you sat jungkook down at the booth, waving down the same waitress from before, asking for yet another cup of coffee, and this time, said waitress gave you a knowing smirk and hurried off before you could protest.

 your face flushed scarlet as you took a long sip of your now cold coffee, avoiding jungkook’s eyes, and said male huffed a laugh across from you. “what’s gotten you so flustered?” he teased, and you fought the urge to throw a napkin at him. “that waitress thinks we’re dating.” you grumbled, picking at your blueberry muffin, and jungkook chuckled. “is the thought of dating me really that horrible to you?” his tone was light, teasing, but you couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty.

  “n-no, not at all.” you stammered, still refusing to meet jungkook’s gaze, and shoved a piece of blueberry muffin in your mouth, chewing slowly, cheeks burning, and said male just laughed in amusement and thanked the waitress, who placed his coffee on the table, smiling, and briskly walked away.

   jungkook downed the rest of his coffee, setting the now empty mug on the table, and studied you carefully, looking for any signs of distress. he’d saw how surprised you were to see him, as if you had doubted that he would be able to find you, and his heart had soared with half relief and worry. relief that you were safe, and worry that you were trying to pretend that you were okay.

  you seemed composed and calm, with your back ramrod straight and sipping your coffee carefully, but jungkook noticed that your hands were trembling slightly as you placed the mug down. he narrowed his eyes, considering, and schooled his features back into neutrality when you turned to him, expression unreadable, and sighed.

  “what’s wrong?” he asked, trying to sound as nonchalant and casual as possible, and you smiled sadly, shaking your head softly. “nothing, really, it’s just…. how am i going to tell hoseok and tae that i’m planning on leaving them?” jungkook swallowed against the bile in his throat at the thought of said males looking at you with sad eyes, and gave a philosophical shrug in response.

  “i know i’m not super close with them, but i think they’d respect your decision, at least, they would understand.” he supplied, and you ran a hand through you hair, letting out a frustrated sigh. “leaving them was what exactly held me back from handing in my letter of resignation.” you mumbled, slumping in the booth seat across from him, looking utterly defeated.

  “for what it’s worth, you’ll hopefully have a better boss and have more days off?” you laughed, reaching across the table and ruffling his hair affectionately, and jungkook felt his face grow hot, color blooming across his cheeks.

“also, i’m sorry for running off like that without contacting any of you first, i guess i wasn’t thinking straight.” you admitted, and jungkook waved off your apology. “y/n, never think that you’re at fault.” ‘but-” you started, but were cut off by the aforementioned male with a half-hearted glare in warning.

  “i know that you’re going to try and continue to blame yourself, but none of what has happened, including the incidents with namjoon have never been your fault.” jungkook reassured you gently, and you gave him what you hoped was a convincing smile, despite the fact that you secretly disagreed.

   in fact, all of what happened had been because of you in one way or another, and you hated being a burden to your friends, who you knew you didn’t deserve in the slightest. but since you knew arguing was futile, you just gave jungkook a grateful smile and reached for his hand across the table, squeezing it gently.

  “thank you, kook.” you mouthed, and when he beamed at you, eyes crinkling at the corners, and you ignored the guilt eating away at your heart.

    taehyung sighed in relief when he got the text from jungkook, confirming that y/n was alright, and that she had merely run off to a cafe an hour away from the city. when he’d broken the news to hoseok, said male had burst out sobbing, grumbling about how he was going to yell at you the second he saw you. taehyung could only laugh in response, knowing that the older would do the exact opposite.

   after hoseok had calmed down a bit, taehyung had handed him a bottle of water, of which the older male took gratefully, downing its contents. “she really knows how to give someone a near heart attack, huh?” hoseok chuckled, voice hoarse from crying, and taehyung rolled his  eyes fondly. “she sure does, but we love her anyway.” he added, and hoseok nodded in agreement.

  taehyung sighed, slumping tiredly against the worn leather of his living room couch, and let his eyes flutter shut. he wasn’t sure what time it was, nor did he want to know. he was beyond exhausted, and let himself drift into dreamland.

  you nervously walked into work the next day, worried of the rumours that would befell you, as you knew you had caused such a scene yesterday. taehyung and hoseok, who had insisted on driving you to work today, stood protectively on either side of you, your arms looped through theirs, and taehyung mouthed “keep your chin up, you’re better than they are.”

 you allowed yourself a small smile and adjusted your posture, raising your chin slightly, refusing to look at your fellow co-workers as the three of you sauntered into the office, not daring to break stride until you reached your desk. you gave hoseok and taehyung grateful looks, and they beamed back at you, eyes twinkling, and you couldn’t help but smile back, despite how nervous you felt.

   namjoon had yet to arrive, and you were dreading it, to say the least. you had practically yelled at him yesterday, and that fact alone was enough to make your stomach churn. he was probably going to fire you on the spot, and while that was what you had wanted before, you were planning on at least staying for a couple months before deciding to leave entirely.

  but because of the fiasco that you alone were the sole cause of; you doubted your role as his secretary would last any longer than it had to. you tried to distract yourself by working on a long overdue email to a corporate company, but to no avail. however, there was that petty part of you that felt satisfied at what you had said to namjoon, for he had done little to make your work life pleasant.

  he was narcissistic, cold, unforgiving, unsympathetic, and arrogant. all of the executives who’d been unfortunate enough to meet him had nothing but harsh words to say, but were too afraid to voice such opinions out loud, for namjoon held enough power in the business industry that he could end their careers with a single phone call. you shook off the thought and tried to busy yourself with work.

   namjoon sauntered into his office, not bothering to make eye contact with anyone, hoping that the dark circles under his eyes weren’t too visible. he’d barely gotten any sleep the previous night, due to the last words you said to him lingering in his mind.

 he was infuriated and confused that such words had affected him so greatly, or rather, why his own secretary was making him lose his mind. namjoon had never had any close, intimate relationships, despite his handsome looks, as people usually told him that his personality was his downfall.

 namjoon had also never known what it was like to love and to be loved, as his family was dysfunctional and didn’t give two shits about him. and because namjoon was expected to carry on the family business, romance was the last thing on his mind. intimacy and love scared him, and he wasn’t sure if intimacy was something he wanted. then again, there were the women who desperately pined for his attention, all lipstick wearing and low cut dresses, but he had remained indifferent to all their attempts.

  thus, namjoon deemed relationships, or romance for that matter, as a waste of time, and threw himself into his work instead, committing to the arduous hours, paperwork, and meetings. he’d never been one to fantasize about such trivial things either.

  then, namjoon met you. you were hardworking, stubborn, quick-witted, and slow to anger. you took his criticism in stride and always did your best to improve. you were also one of the first girls who didn’t try to seduce him, or rather, know who he was.

  you were aware that he had power and status, but not to the scale it was now. thus, you were hired as his secretary, and had remained as such for nearly nine years. namjoon was certain that your position was permanent, but that terrible night just a month ago had proved him wrong.

  when you had informed him that you wanted to quit, he hadn’t known how to react, and instead had lashed out, which probably only fueled your hatred for him. namjoon knew that you absolutely loathed him, for the look in your eyes was unmistakable whenever he made eye contact.

  while he was used to getting dirty looks and loathful sneers on the daily, it had never affected him this much. usually, namjoon would roll his eyes and smirk, but all of that seemed to vanish when you were looking at him with enough contempt and malice to make him shiver slightly in fear. for the first time in his career, you were one of the only girls who didn’t flirt with him, remaining indifferent but unfailingly polite. namjoon had never met someone like you before, so it took him back a bit.

   namjoon wasn’t sure why he would get annoyed at seeing you with jung hoseok and kim taehyung, smiling and laughing like there was no tomorrow. not to mention that his blood would boil whenever jungkook was with you. he had the gall to injure him, twice, in fact, and then threaten to hire y/n, knowing that you were one of his most competent employees.

  sleepless nights became more frequent than usual, with constant tossing and turning, and namjoon had begun to get frustrated and confused of why such things were happening to him, and tried to ignore that strange, aching feeling in his heart. even yoongi, who usually kept quiet about most things, at least, when it came to namjoon, spoke up about his strange behavior. namjoon’s mind was constantly swimming with thoughts, and he was sure he was going to get a migraine at any time now.

    namjoon didn’t bother to look back at anyone as he swung the door open to his office, stepping inside and closing the door firmly behind him. he plopped down tiredly on his chair, sighing heavily, and turned to the sleek desktop, powering it on and then proceeded to check his emails.

  namjoon scrolled lazily through his inbox, deleting the ones that were from executives he knew were two-faced and had no intention in actually keeping their promises to him. scroll, click, delete. scroll, click, delete. this went on for what seemed like forever, until his eyes burned from looking at the screen.

  he feigned interest in the papers on his desk, organizing them into a neat stack on the side of his desk, and then picked up the financial reports, flipping through the thick packet. as per usual, everything was the same, and his company was doing well, so namjoon just set said reports off to the side after a few minutes.

  a soft knock sounded at his door, and namjoon muttered a barely audible “come in.” you stood awkwardly in the doorway, hesitating. he ignored the familiar ache in his chest at the sight of you in a loose, white blouse that tied at the front with a beige skirt that showed off your long legs, and schooled his features into neutrality. “i have the weekly reports from the resources team, if you’d like to see them, of course.” you said, that overly polite tone making an appearance, and namjoon fought the urge to frown at the sound of it.

  “set the file on my desk.” he blurted, and mentally winced at his sharp and blunt tone. do you always have to sound like such a condescending asshole? namjoon thought frustatedly. you simply nodded and moved to gently place the thick folder that he hadn’t noticed until now on his desk.

   you stepped back, as if afraid that he’d lash out at you, and namjoon felt his heart sink down to his stomach. sure, he wasn’t exactly the nicest person in the world, but he wasn’t heartless, contradictory to what others usually said about him.

  “y/n, can we talk?” he asked, trying to sound as cordial as possible, and didn’t miss the way you hesitated before replying, biting your lower lip nervously. “what could you possibly want to talk to me about? i don’t think we have anything to talk about, especially after what happened yesterday. you’ve made it very clear that you hate me, and not to mention you practically dismissed me the first time i tried to have a civilized conversation with you.” you seethed, and namjoon flinched at the coldness in your voice.

  “but, since you asked so nicely,” you drawled, “i’ll listen. you have five minutes, sir, and don’t waste my time, i’m a very busy person, you know.” namjoon sighed internally. “you’re not going to make this easy for me, are you?” you shook your head. “nope.” you beamed.

   here goes nothing, and don’t fuck up this time, namjoon, he thought, clearing his throat awkwardly before taking a deep bracing breath. you stood a few feet away, looking almost bored, examining your nails. “well?” you asked, raising a brow, and namjoon resisted the urge to scowl.

  “i know i haven’t been the greatest boss, i’m well aware of that. and i’m also aware that i can come off as a bit arrogant and uncaring.” you scoffed, not bothering to look over at him. “that’s the biggest fucking understand of the year. anyways, continue.” you muttered, waving a dismissive hand.

 “i also insulted you and jungkook, without knowing how close you were with him.” at this, you rolled your eyes. “i mean, i thought it was blatantly obvious. oh, and i know the history between the two of you, and to be honest, i thought it was kind of shitty that you decided to just drop your friendship with him entirely all because of some girl. i mean, i know that it hurts to find out that your best friend is dating the person you like, but you could’ve at least tried to be happy for him, at least, that’s what a decent person would’ve done, instead of cutting him out of your life completely. that’s a new low, even for you.” you chuckled darkly, and namjoon shuddered internally.

   “what will it take for you to forgive me?” namjoon demanded, unable to hide the anger and frustration in his voice, and you just let out a harsh laugh. “i don’t think anyhing you could say or do could make me forgive you, especially after all these years. although, maybe you could od me a favor by finally letting me go.” namjoon sighed, feeling defeated.

  “if i agree, will you stay for one more month?” there was a long stretch of silence before you sighed heavily. “fine, but if you cross the line again, i’m staying for two weeks.” you replied, voice curt, and before namjoon could reply, you turned on your heels and walked out of his office, firmly closing the door behind you.

  namjoon sat numbly in his chair, stunned. he wasn’t sure what response he’d been expecting, but it definitely had not been that. he sighed a long, suffering sigh, and ran a hand through his hair. you had made it clear that you were less than willing to forgive him for what he’d done, and now he had to think of a different approach.

   you were practically fuming when you took your usual seat next to hoseok during your lunch break, and said male looked over at you, concern furrowing his brow. “did he piss you off again?” he asked hesitantly, and you nodded, pursing your lips together tightly. taehyung looked on curiously, shoving a piece of sushi in his mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

  “he tried to make the shittest apology ever, which, by the way, was worse than those youtubers that do horrible shit and are forced to make an even shittier apology video.” taehyung grimaced. “that bad?” you scoffed. “even worse. i swear, that man doesn’t have an ounce of empathy in his body.”

 hoseok sighed next to you, turning towards you, and you couldn’t help but notice the dark circles under said male’s eyes, as if he hadn’t gotten much sleep at all. “look,y/n, i know that our boss isn’t your favorite person in the world and that he’s kind of an ass, but this whole cat and mouse game that you two have been playing has been quite exhausting to watch.” you looked at him in disbelief. “what do you mean by cat and mouse game?” hoseok rolled his eyes. “please, don’t act like you don’t know.” “know what?” you demanded, not bothering to hide your exasperated tone. “i hate to say it, but i think you like him.” you nearly choked on your ramen as the words left his mouth. “w-what?” “you like him, don’t you?” hoseok asked slowly, and you shook your head vigorously.

  “don’t be ridiculous! why would i be ever attracted to someone like him?” you cried, throwing your hands up in exasperation. taehyung shrugged. “hoseok hyung kind of a has a point. i mean, yeah, he’s an ass sometimes, but a crush is a crush.” you felt your cheeks flame. “shut up! i am in no way attracted to that prick!” you hissed, and taehyung and hoseok just gave you shit-eating grins. “whatever you say, y/n.” they sing-songed, and you fought the urge to whack both of them with your chopsticks.

   yoongi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation as namjoon told him of the day’s events. “joon, you’re one of the most intelligent people i know, but how can you be so stupid?” said male refused to meet his gaze, cheeks flushed with shame. “you’re really shit at apologizing, huh?” he mumbled, and reached for his half-empty glass of whisky, downing the contents and setting it on the coffee table.

   the strong liquid lingered in his mouth as yoongi contemplated on what to say next, eyes shifting around the room. after a moment, he sighed a long, suffering sigh. “namjoon, things are probably going to get worse if you keep acting like a domineering asshole.” said male sighed. “don’t you think i know that?” he groused, and yoongi rolled his eyes.

  “all i’m saying is that you need to find closure with her or something. also, didn’t you not want her to leave?” at namjoon’s flushed cheeks, yoongi bit back a smirk. “she’s the most competent secretary i’ve ever had, that’s all.” he mumbled, and yoongi fought the urge to scoff at how utterly obvious his friend was being.

  yoongi tsked. “well, at least if you do fuck up again, which, at this rate, i’m sure you will, you can always hire a new secretary, i’m sure there are many people willing to take y/n’s place.” namjoon scrunched his nose in disgust. “no one could ever replace her, yoongi. no one.” he muttered, and this time, yoongi couldn’t help the amused laugh that tumbled out of him.

  “you really like her, don’t you?” color spread across namjoon’s cheeks as said male refused to meet yoongi’s gaze. “don’t be ridiculous, you know i think relationships are a complete and utter waste of time.” he grumbled, and yoongi just sighed in exasperation.

     jungkook nearly crushed the water bottle he’d been drinking as hoseok filled him in on what had had happened earlier that day between you and namjoon, blood boiling. he clenched his jaw so hard it felt as if it would break, but jungkook could’ve cared less if it did.

  “that asshole really thought he could just woo her over with that pathetic attempt of an apology?” he seethed, and hoseok shrugged philosophically. “i dunno. besides, who knows what the hell goes through that guy’s head?” jungkook took a deep, bracing breath, practically slumping on hoseok’s couch, and said male patted him on the shoulder, as if in comfort.

  “kook, i know that this is probably the last thing you want to hear, but maybe you should apologize to him?” hoseok asked, voice hesitant, and jungkook felt his entire body tense at the suggestion. “why should i? he’s the one who pushed me away all because of some girl.” he grumbled, and this time, it was hoseok’s turn to sigh.

  “like i said, i know that it’s the last thing you want to do, but-” “there’s no way in hell i’m apologizing to that jerk. if anything, namjoon should apologize to me, ruining our friendship over a girl, for fucks sake.” jungkook snapped, and immediately regretted it when he saw sadness and hurt flash across hoseok’s face.

 the latter just gave him a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. and before jungkook could blurt out an apology, something to fix what’d he’d done, hoseok got up and walked away, not bothering to look back as he disappeared upstairs. jungkook heard a door close firmly, and then utter silence. jungkook felt his face grow hot and buried his face in his hands, sobbing uncontrollably. why do i always have to fuck up everything? he thought miserably.

     you had just slung your bag over your shoulder when taehyung ran up to you, breathless and panting, as if he’d just ran a marathon. normally, you’d start teasing him for being unfit, but as soon as you saw the tense and worried expression on your friend’s face, that thought completely vanished from your mind.

“what’s wrong?” you asked, trying to sound as calm as possible, despite the erratic beating of your heart. after letting taehyung catch his breath, said male filled you in on what had had happened, and by the time he was done, you felt your heart sink down into your chest.

  “where’s jungkook now?” you managed to say, despite yourself. taehyung shrugged. “i don’t know, but we should probably head out now before one of the most prominent figures in seoul becomes roadkill.’’ you glared at taehyung as you rushed out of the building, him on your heels.

    hoseok sighed, running a hand through his already disheveled hair, trudging over to the dirty mirror that was propped up against a pile of books, wincing at what he saw. his eyes were red and raw from crying, dark circles prominent, and his hair was practically a bird’s nest from how messy it was. he shrugged off his now wrinkled work clothes, of which he hadn’t bothered to change out of earlier, and put on a loose shirt and sweatpants.

   after he looked somewhat decent, hoseok hesitantly made his way downstairs, where he’d left jungkook after their small argument earlier in the day. his heart sunk at what he saw. jungkook was sobbing uncontrollably, face buried in the crook of your neck, and your arms were wrapped around him firmly, rubbing his back in smooth circles, as if trying to soothe a crying child.

  taehyung was standing awkwardly a few feet away, expression unreadable. hoseok grimaced at the tense atmosphere, and quietly ran back to the safety of his room like the coward he was. as soon as the door closed behind him, hoseok plopped down onto his bed and let out a frustrated sigh. i really need to stop running away from my problems, he thought, burying his face into his pillow, resisting the urge to scream into it.

    after jungkook’s tears had subsided, you placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, squeezing it gently. “are you okay?” you asked, heart aching at how red-rimmed jungkook’s eyes were. aforementioned male shook his head. “i’m fine, at least, now i am.” he croaked. “i didn’t mean to snap at him like that, i was just so frustrated about what happened between you and namjoon-”

  you felt your blood run cold, and jungkook seemed to realize that he’d messed up, because his eyes went wide, resembling a deer caught in headlights. “how did you know about what happened between us?” “i-” “it was me.” a voice interrupted, and causing you both to jump in surprise, turning to see hoseok standing awkwardly a few feet away, light brown hair disheveled. “you told him?” you blurted, trying to fight the angry tears that were threatening to spill.

  hoseok nodded softly, not bothering to hide the slight grimace on his face, and you felt your heart was going to spilt into two. you weren’t sure how to feel, for one part of you knew that he was just trying to look out for you, while the other was slightly angry that jungkook had found out. you just didn’t want to worry him, for you felt that you had troubled him enough these days.

  “i’m sorry for telling him, but he would’ve probably found out eventually.” “so what? you thought that it would be a good idea to tell jungkook without asking me first?” you hissed, feeling your face grow hot, and immediately regretted it when pure hurt flashed across hoseok’s face.

  “y/n-” he started, but you shook your head, squeezed your eyes shut, as if the sight of him was too much to bear. and without so much as a word or a glance back, you slid off the couch, grabbed your bag off the coffee table, and ran out the front door, slamming it behind you.

   you didn’t know where you were going, but all you knew was that you couldn’t be around anyone right now, not even jungkook, who had done nothing wrong. you felt hot tears slide down your cheeks as you ran, wiping them away hastily with the back of your hand.

  you hated feeling such an immense amount of guilt, for lashing out at hoseok, who was only looking you for you, and for being such a burden to everyone. the namjoon fiasco, or rather, fiascos, had been a constant occurrence, and you knew that all of your friends had been going through so much shit recently, all because of you.

 and because you loved your friends to pieces, maybe the best thing was to distance yourself for a while, and maybe, just maybe, things would get better. you couldn’t stand to trouble them any further than you had.

   taehyung dialed your number for what seemed like the millionth time in the past thirty minutes, running a hand through his already messy hair. and when the call went to voicemail yet again, he buried his face in his hands, trying to fight back worried tears.

 he felt a warm hand on his shoulder, as if in comfort, and felt himself relax, just a bit. “it’s ok, tae, just give her time.” hoseok said gently, and taehyung sighed, removing his hands from his face, sighing deeply. “i know, but i can’t help but worry about her.” he murmured. hoseok just gave the younger a sympathetic look and went to make coffee.

   you softly knocked on the door of your older sister’s apartment, wrapping your arms around yourself, trying to keep warm from the bitter cold seeping through your bones. it’d started to downpour as you got out of the taxi, and in a pathetic attempt to keep yourself dry, you had raised your arm over your head and ran as fast as your four inch heels could take you.

  your sister opened the door dressed in a worn college hoodie and sweats, a look of surprise that immediately turned to one of concern when she took in your soaked through blouse and skirt, along with your now ruined heels.

  “y/n, what the hell happened to you?” she asked as she ushered you inside, immediately grabbing a nearby kitchen towel and draping it over your shoulders. “hold on, i’ll get you a better one.” she said, and before you could say anything, she rushed off.

  you stood awkwardly in the middle of your sister’s living room, trying not to get water on the expensive rug she’d purchased with her paycheck last summer, wrapping the gray kitchen towel tighter around you. when your sister returned, she practically pulled said towel off of you, replacing it with a blue one that smelled like her shampoo, citrus and sweet.

   “what the hell happened?” she demanded as soon as you’d showered and changed into fresh, clean clothes. you took a long sip of the warm cup of coffee she’d made you a few minutes ago, sighing. “it’s a long story.” you murmured, setting the mug down on her coffee table, and your sister rolled her eyes. “i have all night, so start from the beginning.” she said, crossing her arms over her chest, raising an expectant eyebrow, as if to say, ‘well, go on, explain.” you took a long, bracing breath before you told her everything, including the events of the past few weeks.

   by the time you’d finished rambling for what seemed like three hours, malhee regarded you calmly, fingers playing with the worn sleeve of her hoodie. “so?” you asked nervously, and after a long stretch of silence, your sister let out a low whistle. “fucking hell, y/n, what kind of shit have you been through? and your boss sounds like a complete ass.” you winced, reaching for your now cold cup of coffee and taking a small sip.

   “work’s fine, i promise, my boss is just….” “an inconsiderate piece of shit?” malhee finished, clear disgust in her voice. “i-i guess.” “do you need me to give this asshole a piece of my mind? because i will beat the shit out of him if you want me to.” she seethed, and you grimaced at the image of your older sister punching one of the most influential figures in seoul.

   “please don’t, we don’t have enough money to bail you out of jail.” malhee sighed in defeat. “i hate when you’re reasonable. ”she grumbled. “anyway, enough about your boss, how are those guys you’ve been hanging out with?” she asked, eyes glittering with mirth, and you fought the urge to roll your eyes.

  “whatever you think is happening between us, it’s not like that.” malhee scoffed. “please, you mean to tell me that you have attractive men around you and you’re not dating one of them?” “malhee! what the hell!” you scolded, cheeks burning, and she rolled her eyes. “what?”

  “ i am not dating with anyone, nor do i have any plans to.” “seriously, y/n?? not even that jungkook dude you’re always hanging out with?” you blushed furiously. “no, not even him. besides, he just broke up with his girlfriend a month ago, so i doubt that he’s up for any dating right now.” malhee let out a long, frustrated sigh. “it’s been longer than that, surely he’s over her by now?” you just shrugged philosophically. “i haven’t asked, and honestly, i’m not sure he is, i mean, he really liked this girl.”

  malhee opened her mouth to protest when there was a knock at her door. she sighed and got up to answer it. you followed after her, curious as to who was knocking at your sister’s door at this hour, and you couldn’t help the look of surprise when you realized who it was.

    “vice chairman?” said male was standing awkwardly at your sister’s doorstep, fidgeting nervously with his hands, as if he wasn’t sure what to do with them. “h-hi, i’m-” “i know who you are, you’re the asshole who’s been making my sister’s life a living hell.” malhee said cooly but you could hear the evident disgust in her tone.  you immediately rushed over, gripping her shoulders tightly, trying to pull her away.

  to your dismay, your sister didn’t budge, instead, she stood her ground and looked namjoon dead in the eyes, expression hard as steel. “what the hell are you doing here?” she demanded, and the taller of the two visibly flinched at the coldness in malhee’s voice.

  “i-i wanted to apologize for-” malhee scoffed, cutting him off abruptly. “apologize my ass. you really think you can just muster up some bullshit apology and expect my sister to fall at your feet? she’s been working her ass off for her you nine years, and not once have you ever shown that you’re grateful. all you do is take advantage of her, you don’t even deserve her as your secretary. i’m surprised she hasn’t up and left yet.”

   she barked a laugh,  the sound cold and unforgiving. “what? cat got your tongue?” malhee sneered, and namjoon said nothing, just bowed awkwardly, turned on his heels, and left. as soon as your sister had slammed the door behind him, you removed your hands from her shoulders, pacing back and forth anxiously.

  “are you insane?!” you whisper-yelled, and malhee rolled her eyes yet again. “what? that asshole had the nerve to show his face and so i got rid of him for you, you’re welcome, by the way.” you ran a hand through your hair, letting out a deep sigh. “look, i know he’s an asshole and all, but he’s still my boss, and he can fire me whenever he wants.” you reasoned, and malhee simply said nothing, just marched past you into her living room. sighing, you followed after, wondering if she had just cost you your job.

    jungkook had drunk all of half a bottle of soju when his phone rang. he knew exactly who was calling before he picked up. “what happened?” taehyung sighed heavily. “she ran away again, to god knows where.” “fuck, i hope she’s okay.” he grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

  down the snow-white table, hoseok arched a brow, his silver earrings shifting with the movement. jungkook sighed and set the bottle down. he should’ve ran after you, done something, anything to keep you from running away again. but deep down, jungkook knew that trying to convince you otherwise would be useless, for once you set your mind on something, there was no going back.

   jungkook asked, “do you have any idea of where she might’ve run off to?” “i’m not sure,” taehyung admitted. “but,” he added, “she does have an older sister who has an apartment somewhere here. i’ve never been there, but i think hoseok has. ask him. is he there with you?”

  as if he’d overheard, hoseok arched a questioning brow, and jungkook held up a finger. wait. the older male nodded, pulling out his phone and tapping away on it, the blue light from the device illuminating his sharp features. “yeah, he is.” jungkoook said softly, and after promising taehyung that he’d call him once he knew something, he hung up swiftly.

   “so, what’d taehyung say? where’s y/n?” hoseok demanded, but his voice held no anger, only immense worry. “he doesn’t know for sure, but he mentioned something about y/n having an older sister.” to his relief, hoseok’s light brown eyes lit up with recognition. “malhee?” jungkook nodded slowly. “yeah, do you know her?” he asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

  hoseok nodded. “yeah, i do. y/n invited me over to her apartment for christmas one year, and her sister was there. she’s nice, though i didn’t really get to talk to her much, since she was holed up at work half the time i was there.” “what does her sister do?” “oh, she’s a nurse down at a local hospital.” jungkook hummed in acknowledgement. “she sounds cool.”

  hoseok shrugged. “yeah, i guess.” “have you ever been to y/n’s sister’s apartment? taehyung mentioned that she has one in the area.” when the older shook his head, jungkook tried not to look disappointed. “although, i might have an idea of where it might be, but i can’t make any promises.” for the first time that evening, jungkook felt his spirits rise, just a bit. “it’s better than nothing.”

    hours later, hoseok, taehyung, and jungkook stood in front of your sister’s apartment door, breathing heavily, as if they’d ran a marathon. they were near-exhaustation, half from searching all night and the other from running around the streets like madmen, asking random strangers if they’d seen you.

 and, just a few minutes ago, a short old lady with kind eyes informed that she had seen you run towards an apartment with a blue-painted door, and the three males had never ran faster in their life as soon the words left the lady’s mouth. so, here they were, standing in front of said door, contemplating on whether they should knock or leave.

   after a long stretch of silence, taehyung murmured “fuck it” under his breath and went to knock on the door. hoseok and jungkook held their breaths for longer than they should’ve, and the door opened to reveal a tall, dark-haired female wearing a worn college hoodie and sweats.

  “who are you guys, and why the hell are you standing near my door like stalkers?” she demanded, dark eyes glinting dangerously, and jungkook gulped nervously. though he had never met malhee, from the look in her eyes alone, he knew that the female promised hell if anything happened to you.

   “malhee? do you remember me? y/n invited me over for christmas one year? i was the guy who spilled hot chocolate all over myself.” hoseok blurted, cheeks coloring, and the look in malhee’s eyes softened, just a bit, twinkling with amusement and recognition. “yes, i do, you’re hoseok, right? and the two of you must also be y/n’s friends.”

  taehyung and jungkook waved awkwardly from where they were hiding behind hoseok, and malhee moved to let the three males inside. “i’m about to make dinner, do any of you want anything?” before any of them could reply, a familiar figure shuffled into the room.

  “malhee, who’s at the-” you broke off at the sight of your three friends standing awkwardly in the living room, looking sheepish. “what are they doing here?” you blurted, and it came out harsher than you meant it to, because hoseok winced slightly at your tone.

  “they were standing outside the door like creepy stalkers and i recognized hoseok, so i let them in. they’re those friends you keep talking about, right?” you nodded weakly, and malhee smiled, oblivious to the tension in the room, and went to make dinner.

   “we were so worried about you! why did you just up and run like that?” hoseok began, clear distress and relief in his voice, and you sighed. “look, i know it was a shitty thing to do, and i’m sorry. i’m also sorry for lashing out like that, i guess i was just so worked up over what happened with namjoon and i that i took it out on all of you. i’m sorry for always causing trouble, i-” you broke off as a soft sob escaped your mouth, and almost immediately, strong arms were around you, pulling you into a warm embrace.

   you sobbed, burying your face in the crook of taehyung’s neck, breathing in his rain and cedar scent, and felt him rub comforting circles on your back. hoseok and jungkook looked on sadly, moving to help malhee with dinner.

 after you had calmed down and your tears subsided, taehyung led over to the kitchen, sitting you down at one of the stools at the island, and you managed a small, grateful smile. before you could say anything, jungkook cut in, saying, “if you’re going to apologize again, then don’t say anything. we’re your friends, y/n, no matter how much shit we put each other through.”

  at the sincerity of jungkook’s words, you felt like crying again, for you didn’t deserve friends like them. within the past few weeks, you had put all of them through so much, and no matter how much you tried to apologize, they refused to accept them, insisting that you had nothing to be sorry for, much to your protest. you gave jungkook a grateful smile, to which he returned with a bright grin of his own.

  malhee cleared her throat awkwardly, setting down plates of pancakes, bacon, and cups of fresh coffee, snapping you back to reality. you felt your cheeks warm as you grabbed a piece of bacon and chewed on it thoughtfully, refusing to look at anyone.

  breakfast was a flurry of friendly and warm conversation, with hoseok nearly upending his plate from laughter, and malhee scolding him half-heartedly. you avoided prying questions from malhee about your love life, with hoseok, taehyung, and jungkook wincing.

  “will you quit asking me about my love life?” you hissed, cheeks burning, and malhee gave you a knowing smirk. “why not? i’m your sister, i’m allowed to be curious about these kinds of things”. you huffed in frustration. “fine, since you’re so curious, work has been too much of a pain for me to even consider dating, let alone a relationship. and even if someone did catch my eye, they’d probably start running for the hills when they find out that i’m a secretary for the kim namjoon. or maybe they’d stick around, thinking that i’m paid millions and try to leech off of me.”

  hoseok gave you a sympathetic look from across the table, and jungkook reached for your hand, squeezing it gently, as if in comfort. “i just- i’ve never had any luck with guys, let alone love. and, honestly, after all that’s happened these past few weeks, it just goes to show that i am not cut out for a relationship, at least, not now.”

  malhee nodded in agreement. “i’m sorry i’ve been so invasive.” you shook your head, waving away her apology. “it’s okay, you’re just worried about me, in your own way.” your sister’s expression turned deadly serious as she said, “if any guy tries to fuck with you, i’ll kick his ass.” jungkook, hoseok, and taehyung let out non-committal grunts in agreement, and you fought the urge to roll your eyes at their protectiveness. “thank you.” “no need for thank yous and sorrys between us, y/n, we just don’t want to see you get hurt.” you felt your heart warm and ache all at once, and felt lighter than you had in weeks.

    hoseok and taehyung bid their goodbyes as they left your sister’s apartment, promising to text you later, and as soon as the door closed behind them,  you whirled to face jungkook, who was sitting on the living couch, looking slightly nervous.

  “kook? what are you still doing here? shouldn’t you be heading back to get ready for work?” you asked, shuffling into the kitchen to clean dishes. malhee had had to run off to work as soon as breakfast had finished, and so that meant you were on cleaning duty. you didn’t mind, for you often cleaned up after your sister, despite her being the oldest.

  “i know, but i wanted to tell you something, and i wanted to wait until we were alone to do so.” he mumbled, cheeks warming, and you bit back a smile at how flustered jungkook was. “oh, okay, uhm, is it something i should sit down for?” you asked, carefully putting the plate you’d been about to clean back in the sink. when jungkook nodded, you exhaled softly, and seconds later, sat down on the couch opposite him, wringing your hands together nervously.

   you felt your eyes scan jungkook’s face, looking for any signs of a smile, wondering if this was all some elaborate prank, but to avail. said male’s expression was unreadable, but you could see the nervousness and wariness in his eyes. jungkook ran a hand through his dishevled blond hair, sighing deeply.

   “promise me one thing?” he asked, and you nodded. “anything, what is it?” “promise me that you won’t hate me after this.” you blinked back your shock at the bluntness in his tone, but promised that you could never do such a thing. “you might not say that after this.” he muttered, and you felt your heart slamming against your ribcage.

  jungkook took a deep, bracing breath, and you braced yourself for what was about to come. “I know this probably isn’t the best time to tell you this, after all the shit that has happened recently, but i just can’t keep this to myself anymore.” “kook, you’re scaring me, what is it?” you asked, trying to keep your tone as even as possible, though the frantic beating of your heart said otherwise. jungkook’s dark brown eyes glittered with sadness as he looked up at you, and your heart ached at the sight. “i hope that this changes nothing between us, i-i can’t imagine my life without you in it.” normally, you would’ve grimaced at the cheesy and overused line, but jungkook sounded so sincere and genuine that you couldn’t bring yourself to do so.

   “you know how i told you that jieun and i broke up so that i could focus on work?” jungkook asked, voice shaking, and you nodded solemnly. “yeah, why?” jungkook reached for your hands, holding them gently, as if they would break at any moment. the pad of his thumb brushed across your knuckles, and you felt your heart flutter stupidly at the gesture.

   “i may have lied.” you felt your eyes widen. “what? then why did you two break up?” jungkook hesitated, and you gestured for him to elaborate. “i-i realized something.” he stammered, and you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. “realized what?” “that i like you.” jungkook blurted, and you felt your hands go limp.

  “y-you what?” you managed, swallowing against the knot in your throat. “i like you, i realized i like you. jieun saw that i acted differently around you, and after she confronted me about it, our relationship was over. she said that there was no use in being with someone who won’t even give her the time of day.” “but you liked her.” you croaked, and jungkook smiled sadly.

  “i did, but then i realized that my feelings for you were more than platonic.” “h-how long?” you asked, voice sounding faraway and distant, refusing to look at jungkook. “since freshman year of college.” jungkook admitted, color settling across his cheekbones.

   you felt confused and overwhelmed. confused as to why jungkook had lied to you about his reason for breaking up with jieun and how he’d developed feelings for you, and overwhelmed at his sudden confession. most of all, though, you weren’t sure how to feel. after all, your past relationship hadn’t been the best, and since then, pursuing an intimate relationship was the last thing on your mind.

  “y/n? talk to me, say something, please.” jungkook pleaded, and you slowly pulled your hands out of his grip, head swimming with thoughts. “i- i need some time to think.” you mumbled, and without looking back, you ran away.

  jungkook watched helplessly as he watched you go, heart aching. he’d just poured his heart out to you, and you’d told him to give you time. time for what? he’d wanted to say, but couldn’t bring himself to. it’d taken all the self-restraint in him not to run after you, to explain further, but because jungkook didn’t want to overwhelm you further, he let you go.

  he bit back tears, running a hand through his hair, trying to calm himself down. jungkook wasn’t sure how he felt, for his emotions were all over the place. ignoring the aching of his heart, he managed to get off the couch and stumble out your sister’s apartment door, mind jumbled.

   you buried your face in your pillow and sobbed as soon as you heard the front door close. i can’t lose him, you thought despairingly, clutching the soft fabric of your pillow like a vice. jungkook was one of the only friends you had, save for hoseok and taehyung, who had always been there for you. he’d been there when your shitty ex, kangdae, had cheated you not once, but twice, and then turned around and claimed that he loved you. that relationship had ended with you kicking him out of your then shared apartment, and you running over to jungkook’s dorm, which happened to be less than five minutes away.

  that night, he had comforted and held you while you cried into his chest. the next day, jungkook emailed your professors to let them know that you wouldn’t be coming in for classes, and to send all your work to him. while you sulked around his dorm, practically drowning in sorrow and self-pity, jungkook took it upon himself to complete your assignments.

  when you’d found out through an amused email from your arts professor, which stated that a “an attractive young man took your seat in class today and then proceeded to paint a masterpiece of a painting”, you confronted jungkook about it, telling him to stop, and the male had refused.

   “y/n, let me do this for you. you’re healing.” he’d protested, and you had scoffed. “kook, i just broke up with my shitty ass boyfriend.” “so? i just want to help” he’d whined, pouting up at you with those god-damned doe eyes, looking as innocent as a young child. you smiled sadly at the memory, and resisted the urge to grab your phone, which had been thrown off to the side of your bed, to call jungkook and tell him that you felt the same. however, you knew in your heart that that wasn’t certain, and the last thing you wanted to do was pretend to love jungkook, only to rip his heart out in the end.

  you would never be able to forgive yourself if you did such a heinous thing, shuddering at the thought. all you needed to do was figure shit out, to know for certain if you really had feelings for jungkook or not. and if you didn’t, you would have to find a way to break it to him gently. sniffling, you reached for your phone, unlocking it and sending a quick text to jungkook.

 i’m sorry for running off like that, you didn’t deserve that:( jungkook’s reply was almost instantaneous.

 it’s ok, besides, i was kind of an asshole for dumping my feelings on you so suddenly, especially after the shitty day we all had. i understand if you need time to think things over, don’t feel as if you have to rush, take all the time you need. i hope that nothing will change between us. like i said, i can’t imagine my life without you. i know that’s cheesy and cliché or whatever, but it’s true. you’ve been an amazing friend and person to me, and i honestly don’t deserve you either way.

  you felt tears spring to your eyes at his words, and hastily wiped them away with the back of your hand. jungkook always told you that he didn’t deserve you as a friend, but you always thought it was the other way around. no matter how many times you fucked up, jungkook always forgave you, never blaming you for all the shit that had had happened. sniffling, you typed out a response, thumbs flying across the keyboard.

 i feel the same way, you’ve always forgiven me for stupid shit that i’ve done, and i honestly don’t know how you’re not fed up with me yet. his reply made your heart flutter stupidly, and you cursed under your breath at how easily you were swayed.

  i don’t i could ever be “fed up” with you.

  that simple text was enough to make your cheeks warm, and you rolled over, burying your face in your pillow, screaming silently into it. why, oh why do feelings have to be so complicated? you thought frustatedly.

   taehyung hummed softly to himself as he sifted through the thick pile of papers on his desk, eyes skimming over the colorful bar graphs that the resources team had put together. sighing, he put the papers aside and ran a hand through his hair. it’d been extremely difficult to focus, especially since just a few hours ago, shit had gone down, literally and figuratively.

  he rubbed at his temples, willing for the headache that was beginning to form to go away, when his phone rang. taehyung cursed silently under his breath, and, after making sure no one was watching, he answered it.

  “hello?” he asked, not bothering to hide the exhaustion in his voice. “tae?” it was jungkook, and he sounded tense. ‘’what’s wrong?’’ the latter sighed. “i might’ve told y/n something i shouldn’t have.” taehyung resisted the urge to groan in frustration. “what the hell did you do?” he ground out, trying to keep his voice as quiet as possible. “i might’ve told her that i like her.”

  the phone nearly slipped out of taehyung’s hands at jungkook’s words, and he managed to stutter, “y-you did what?!” he could picture the latter wincing on the other end. “yeah, i know, i fucked up, but what else is new? i feel like that’s all i’ve been doing lately, making things even more complicated than they already are. i know it was the last thing i should’ve done, but i-i just wanted to get a little closure, i guess. but that still doesn’t excuse the fact that i practically shoved my feelings in her face like that.” jungkook rambled, and there was no mistaking the distress and guilt in his voice.

  taehyung exhaled softly, pinching the bridge of his nose in mild exasperation. “kook, i honestly don’t know what to tell you. but, i do have one question for you, what did she say? i mean, did she reject you? accept your feelings?” there was a long stretch of silence on the other end, and before taehyung could think of something else to say, jungkook awkwardly cleared his throat.

  “well, not exactly, she said she needs time to think things over.” jungkook mumbled, and taehyung hummed in understanding. “i see, so what do you think she’s going to do?” the former sighed. “i’m not sure, but whatever the outcome is, i have to be ready for it, whether my heart gets broken or not.”

  taehyung felt his heart sink down into his stomach at the utter sadness in his friend’s voice, and promised to text him later before hanging up. he sat in his office chair, bewildered, and tried to make sense of what had just happened.

   hoseok frowned at you and taehyung, who had been working quietly at their desks for what seemed like forever. they’d been acting strange the entire day, extremely fidgety and on edge, as if they were afraid that there was an impending storm or apocalypse.

   “are you two okay? you’ve been acting weird all day.” at that, your head turned to face him, and you gave him the most unconvincing smile ever. “we’re fine, hoseok, don’t worry, we’re just exhausted.” you reassured him, turning back to your paperwork, and taehyung let out a noncommittal grunt in agreement.

 “you two don’t look okay” he argued, noting the dark circles under his friend’s eyes. “we’re fine.” taehyung said, and it must’ve come out harsher than he meant it to, because he winced as soon as the words left his mouth. “shit, i’m sorry hyung, i’m just exhausted, i didn’t mean to snap at you.” hoseok waved off taehyung’s apology. “don’t worry about it, i know you didn’t mean anything by it.” the latter gave him a grateful smile before turning back to his plethora of papers on his desk, and hoseok let his shoulders slump slightly.

  jimin knocked softly on jungkook’s office door, hesitating slightly as he carefully pushed it open. he tried to grimace at how haggard the latter looked, blond hair a tangled mess, dark circles prominent under his eyes, and the way his shoulders seemed to slump.

  “are you okay? you look like shit.” jungkook laughed, the sound broken and a bit hoarse. “well, no, i’m not, today’s been quite the shit-show. first, i snapped at hoseok hyung, then had to go on a wild goose chase for y/n yet again, found her at her older sister’s place, confessed, and-” “wait what? you did what now?” jimin asked in disbelief, and jungkook merely sighed.

  “yes, you heard me correctly, i confessed to her, you know, told her how i felt, can’t live without her, all that cliché shit.” “and then what?” jungkook let out yet another broken laugh. “she didn’t exactly reject me, but didn’t say she returned my feelings either. in short, she told me that she needed time to think things over, whatever the hell that means.” jimin blinked, the only sign that he’d heard, and tried to process what jungkook had just told him.

  “and, to top it all off, i have another meeting in like two minutes. that’s the seventh one today.” jungkook groused, hastily fiddling with his hair, trying to make it look somewhat presentable. “i gotta go, see you later, jimin.” he said, and before jimin could reply, jungkook was gone.

    jimin stood, disbelieving in jungkook’s office, staring into space. the latter had just walked away as if he hadn’t just dropped a bomb into his life. jungkook had confessed. now, jimin had had suspicions and a sort-of gut feeling that his boss liked you, but decided not to get his hopes up about anything, for he also knew that the two of you were close friends.

  however, at least, for jimin, jungkook wasn’t exactly subtle about his feelings either. he noticed it in the way the latter would look at you as if you were the only star in the sky, as his mother would say, and how a simple gesture such as handing her a plate of food seemed so intimate.

jimin sighed and ran a hand through his hair, trying his best to ignore the dread pooling in his stomach as he walked out. he had a feeling things would ge even more complicated than they already were.

   yoongi sat on the edge of namjoon’s desk, a leg crossed over the other, idly twirling a pen between his fingers as the latter rambled to him yet again, about how you hadn’t forgiven him yet, and that his attempt at apologizing had failed.

  yoongi sighed a deep suffering sigh. “didn’t you already tell me this?” color stained namjoon’s cheeks. “i did, but-” “but what? you forgot? or you’re pissed at the fact that she’s not falling at your feet like everyone else does?” namjoon scowled half-heartedly. “why would i be angry about something like that?”

  yoongi gave a philosophical shrug. “don’t know, you tell me. y/n seems to be all you can talk about these days. not once have you come to talk to me about how that business deal with those investors that visited a while ago has gone.” namjoon waved a dismissive hand. “it’s going well.” yoongi fought the urge to roll his eyes. “joon, seriously, do you have feelings for her or not?”

  the male in question’s shoulders visibly tensed, and yoongi hid a smirk, for he knew namjoon well enough to know that that was a “yes.” “you know, it’s okay to have feelings for someone, it’s normal.” yoongi began, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, and namjoon scoffed, though the blush on his cheeks said otherwise.

   “who said i have feelings for her?” “no one did, i was just curious.” yoongi added quickly, and namjoon rolled his eyes. “well, if you must know, i don’t have feelings for her.” yoongi fought the urge to pull his hair out from frustration. “whatever you say joon”, he said instead, not wanting to deal with the former’s stubborness.

    you loosed a breath before knocking firmly on namjoon’s door, clutching the thick manila folder in your hands, willing yourself to act natural and keep calm. as soon as you heard the authoritative “come in”, you stepped inside the big space, keeping your gaze on the floor, refusing to make eye contact as you neared namjoon’s desk.

 “here are the financial reports from the finance team that you requested.” you said, trying to keep your tone as cordial as possible, setting said reports on his desk, stepping back a few feet afterwards. “anything else?” you asked after a long pause of silence. “no, that’ll be all.” namjoon said finally, and you let out an internal sigh of relief.

  you bowed slightly and turned to leave, letting the tension in your shoulders loosen a bit, and managed to slip out of the room before namjoon could put another word in. exhaling softly, you walked back over to your desk, giving hoseok and taehyung a reassuring smile before practically collapsing onto your chair.

  “tired?” taehyung asked, eyes skimming over the paper on his desk, and though you knew he wasn’t looking, you nodded. “i’m exhausted, even though he’s barely given me any work today.” you mumbled, and hoseok shot you a sympathetic look out of the corner of your eye.

   “i guess the events of the last few weeks have really taken a toll on me.” you murmured, and taehyung looked at you with sad eyes. “i’m sorry you’ve been having a shit time lately, i feel like it’s partly our fault.” you shook your head profusely. “no, if anything, it’s my fault that you guys are constantly running around like chickens with your heads cut off.”

  hoseok glared at you half-heartedly. “y/n, seriously, none of what has happened was your fault.” “but-” you began, and the former cut you off with yet another glare. “even if what happened was your fault, which it wasn’t, stop blaming yourself for things that are out of your control, like with what happened with namjoon. it’s not your fault the guy was born with a spoon in his mouth, and that he constantly has a stick up his ass, but that’s besides the point.”

  you snickered at hoseok’s slight jab at namjoon, and started to arrange the pile of papers on your desk. “yeah, i guess you’re right, i just feel like that everything that happened was so sudden, you know?” taehyung nodded his agreement. “yeah, these past few weeks have been quite the shitshow.” hoseok snorted. “understatement of the century there, my friend.”

   jungkook pulled the black cap he was wearing down over his eyes, not wanting to be seen by any of the people in the company cafe, milling about, casual chatter filling the air. he fidgeted uncomfortably in his seat, pulling out his phone and scrolling through it in an attempt to distract himself.

 jungkook must’ve spaced out at some point, because he barely noticed namjoon walking towards him, and how the chatter was reduced to quite whispers. he looked up and immediately tensed at the sight of the tall male sitting awkwardly in front of him.

  jungkook pocketed his phone, crossing his arms over his chest, giving the older male a once-over. “what the hell are you doing here? shouldn’t you be running a company?” he hissed, not bothering to hide the annoyance in his voice. “i could say the same about you, jeon.” namjoon said, regarding him calmly.

  he resisted the urge to deck the older male in the jaw, and instead gave namjoon a tight-lipped smile. “but i assume you’re not here to talk about me, are you?” when the latter didn’t reply, jungkook knew that he was correct. “you’re right, i’m not here to talk about you. i’m here to talk about y/n.” jungkook tried not to let his anger show as he asked,”what about her?”

  “she’s been acting strange lately, and i can’t seem to figure out why. i thought you might know, since you’re so close to her and whatnot.” jungkook couldn’t help but laugh in disbelief. “are you fucking serious?” namjoon’s shoulders visibly tensed. “yes.” he mumbled, cheeks coloring with shame, and jungkook fought the urge to pull out his phone and take a photo because holy shit, one of the most influential conglomerates in seoul, was blushing.

  “as smart as you are, you’re the most dense person i’ve ever met. why the hell do you think she’s acting strangely?” jungkook seethed, unable to hold back the anger in his voice. namjoon had the nerve to shrug. “hell if i know, maybe it’s because she’s finally realized what a piece of shit you are.” jungkook laughed, the sound cold and unamused. “that’s hilarious, namjoon, because i think it’s the other way around. i mean, i don’t make her a glorified slave all the time.” jungkook shot back, and reveled in the way the older male flinched.

  “i may not be the best guy in the world, but at least i’m not an arrogant asshole who thinks the world only revolves around him and uses his secretary to do practically everything for him, since he’s not capable of doing so himself.” jungkook added, giving his former friend the coldest glare he could muster.

 before the older male could say anything else, jungkook stood up, ignoring the blatant stares of the people around him, gave namjoon one last glare, and walked away, seething.

 his phone buzzed once he was out of earshot, and jungkook answered it immediately, phone to his ear as he walked to the parking garage. “yeah?” he asked, hoping he sounded calmer than he felt. “kook?” your voice was hesitant, as if you were afraid that he’d yell, and jungkook felt all his anger vanish immediately. “y/n?” he asked hesitantly, and heard you exhale in relief.

 “kook, where the hell did you run off to? jimin’s been running around like a chicken with his head cut off.” jungkook winced at the image of his secretary and friend being disappointed in him yet again. “i didn’t go anywhere, i just went to the company cafe. i’m downstairs.” he whispered, and heard you sigh again on the other end, this time, a frustrated one.

 “kook, before you decide to run off like that and give jimin a heart attack, the least you could do is tell him. and i know that i don’t exactly have the right to tell you this, as i’ve done exactly the same thing, but i just don’t want anything to happen to you, you know?” jungkook’s heart ached at your apologetic tone. “don’t apologize, it was stupid of me to just run off like that. i guess we’re both pretty dumb, huh?” he teased, despite himself, and couldn’t help the grin that tugged at his lips when he heard you laugh softly.

 “yeah, i guess we are. the biggest dumbasses on the planet, that’s you and me, kook.” you laughed, and jungkook failed and tried to hide his amused smile. “see you soon? drinks at my place?” “yeah, see you, kook.” you said softly, and then the line went dead. jungkook tried to hide the smile that was tugging at his lips as he walked to his car, feeling a bit lighter than he had before.

   “god, you two are practically made for each other.” taehyung groaned once you filled in him on what had happened, and hoseok merely grunted in agreement. you felt your cheeks burn. “would you two cut that out?” “cut what out?” taehyung asked, feigning innocence, cerulean eyes widening, as if he’d been caught vandalizing a building.

  you glared at him, and taehyung just smiled, eyes turning into crescents. “love you.” he sing-songed, and you rolled your eyes. “jungkook invited us over for drinks, wanna come with?” you asked, and when hoseok and taehyung nodded, giving you a thumbs up, you laughed, shaking your head slightly, as you knew they couldn’t refuse drinks.

    jungkook bit his lip anxiously as he waited for jimin to pick up, hoping the latter wasn’t too pissed off with him. jimin picked up after two rings, and jungkook held his breath. “park jimin speaking.” he said, voice pleasantly and unfailingly polite, and jungkook winced, as the tone the former was using was one he used when talking to other businessmen, friendly, but firm.

  “jimin?” jungkook asked hesitantly, and aforementioned male sighed, the sound almost resigned, exhausted, even. “what, kook?” he asked, tone exhausted and nearly exasperated, and jungkook grimaced. “i-i know i messed up again, and i didn’t tell you where i was going, and-” “jungkook, listen to me, okay?” jimin said gently, cutting him off abruptly. “when i found out that you snuck out again, like some rebellious teen, i was angry. angry that you went somewhere without telling me first, but then i realized that maybe i’ve been too harsh on you. i’m always nagging at you, like some mom with a stick up her ass, but it’s because i’m constantly worried about you. we’ve been working together for years now, and not only are you my boss, but you’re my friend, and while you’ve been a pain in my ass at times, you hired me, no questions asked, and gave me opportunities i otherwise would’ve never had. you’ve also been the best friend i’ve ever had. so, that being said, despite how much you’ve fucked up recently, i can’t bring myself to cut you completely out of my life. it’d be boring without your annoying ass.”

  jungkook let out a soft laugh, tears springing to his eyes, wiping them away hastily with the back of his hand. “so, i’m having drinks with y/n, tae, and hoseok, and since we don’t have work tomorrow, do you want to join us?” he heard jimin chuckle softly on the other end. “i’d love to.”

   jungkook was trying not to stare. you had swapped your blouse and skirt for a loose shirt that was two sizes too big, and sweatpants, hair tied into a messy bun atop your head, and he thought you’d never looked so beautiful. you also happened to be wearing one of his shirts and his pair of sweatpants, and though he’d lent you it, jungkook regretted doing so the minute you walked out of the hallway bathroom.

   he felt like such a cliche, practically losing it at the sight of you in his clothes. you weren’t even dating him, and yet the sight looked so domestic, so real. jungkook felt his cheeks burn and took a long sip of soju, trying to will himself to calm the fuck down.

  luckily, hoseok, taehyung, and jimin were too busy bickering over what ice cream flavor was the best to notice that jungkook was a complete mess beside them, and you were watching them, an amused smile on your lips. “how the hell can you like mint chocolate, jimin? you might as well be eating toothtpaste!” hoseok was saying, cheeks red from the alcohol in his system, clearly drunk, from the way his speech was a bit slurred. “shut up hyung! It’s not my fault i have taste.” jimin huffed, pale cheeks rosy.

  hoseok snorted, taking a long swig of soju, wincing at the taste. “whatever you say, jimin, just don’t come crying to me if you get attacked for liking the atrocity that is mint chocolate.” aforementioned male just rolled his eyes, downing the last of his soju.

  jungkook had barely taken a sip of his own drink before he winced and set it down on his coffee table. ever since he’d gotten piss drunk, jungkook decided to abstain from drinking heavily. you were currently scrolling through your phone, the soft blue light illuminating your features, and jungkook felt his cheeks burn, forcing himself to look away.

   get it together, jungkook, you can’t keep staring at her like some creep. besides, she hasn’t even told you if she feels the same. he thought, toying with the thin silver bracelet on his wrist.

  you snickered at the stream of messages your sister had sent you earlier that evening, ranting about her stuck up boss, slipping your phone back in the pocket of the borrowed sweatpants you were wearing.

  sighing, you snuck a glance at jungkook, who was staring off into space, fingers idly toying with the thin silver bracelet on his wrist. for some odd reason, you felt your heart clench at the sight of him, all tousled hair and light brown eyes. jungkook was attractive, he always had been, even when he was a doe-eyed freshman in college, but even more so now that he was much older.

   you’d always had a tiny crush on him, but it was never anything serious, as jungkook had started dating jieun come sophomore year. though you’d never spoken to her, she seemed nice enough and made jungkook happy, so you cheered them on from the sidelines.

  everyone had thought that they’d grow old together, but that had proved to be wrong when their relationship abruptly ended the start of senior year. your heart ached as you remembered the day jungkook showed up at your dorm, eyes puffy and red-rimmed, practically falling into your arms, sobbing uncontrollably. that night had been spent comforting him, binging his favorite movies, of which included kimi no wa.

  seeing jungkook irrevocably heartbroken was heart-wrenching, and said male had spent at least a week at your dorm, moping and stuffing his face with food. he’d apologized profusely later, even going as far as to buy you groceries. you’d accepted them, but not without saying that he didn’t owe you anything at all.

   a warm hand touched your shoulder, bringing you back to reality, and you turned to see jungkook, eyes twinkling with mirth, gesturing for you to look at something. you followed his line of sight and nearly burst out laughing at what you saw.

 hoseok, taehyung, and jimin were sprawled out on jungkook’s living room floor, legs thrown over one another, and you stifled a laugh. “they’re definitely going to regret that tomorrow morning.” jungkook whispered, trying not to laugh. “definetely.” you breathed, trying to will the laughter that was threatening to come out away.

   “I don’t know about you, but i’m exhausted. you can sleep in my room if you want, i’ll take the guest room.” you smacked his shoulder gently as you followed him quietly down the hall. “i’ll take the guest room.” jungkook shook his head. “it’s really okay, y/n, i promise. i’m not going to kill you if you spend one night in my room.” you sighed, the sound resigned and exhausted. “fine.” you mumbled, and jungkook beamed.

  later, as you were about to turn off the lamp on the bedside table, the door to jungkook’s room opened slightly, and said male poked his head in, a sheepish expression on his face. “sorry, did i wake you?” you shook your head, and jungkook stepped inside, and your breath caught in your throat. his bare torso was on display, and black sweatpants hung low on his hips, and you felt your cheeks burn, tearing your gaze away. “kook, what are you doing here?” you mumbled, refusing to make eye contact.

   jungkook furrowed his brows in confusion, wondering why you were so flustered, and then realized as soon as he felt a slight chill on his skin. he felt his cheeks burn, crossing his arms over his chest, suddenly feeling shy. usually, jungkook paraded around his house shirtless all the time and thought nothing of it, for he was usually alone.

 jungkook was in the middle of getting dressed that he suddenly remembered that he needed to tell you something, and rushed out of his room, not bothering to put on a shirt. “s-sorry, i guess i forgot to put one on. i’m sorry if i’m making you uncomfortable.” he mumbled. at that, you turned to face him, eyes wide. “no, of course not! it was just unexpected, that’s all!” you rambled.

   “a-anyway, i just wanted to say goodnight.” he muttered, and ignored the way his pulse quickened at the way the corners of your lips curled into an amused smile, dark eyes twinkling with mirth. “goodnight, kook.” you laughed softly, reaching over to turn off the lamp on the bedside table.

 despite the darkness, jungkook could see you curling up underneath the covers, pulling the duvet up to your chin. before he could stop himself, jungkook walked over to you, leaning down and pressing a soft kiss on your forehead. “goodnight, y/n.” he mumbled, and walked out before you could react.

   after jungkook had left, you laid in the darkness of his room, head spinning from that damned forehead kiss. to make matters worse, you were sleeping in his room, on his bed, practically surrounded with his scent. the faint smell of cologne and citrus had filled your senses as you’d laid down, dizzying you.

  because of his sudden confession, you hadn’t gotten much sleep since. a part of you felt like screaming into the void due to frustration, while the other was fantasizing about what a relationship with jungkook would be like. you felt your cheeks burn at the thought, mentally scolding yourself to get your shit together, and willed yourself to sleep.

   jungkook couldn’t sleep, not after what he’d done. he screamed inwardly, running his hands down over his face. what the hell were you thinking, you idiot, she probably hates you now. he didn’t know what had came over him, nor knew what had led him to do so. jungkook just hoped that you wouldn’t feel uncomfortbale around him after what had had happened.

   jimin woke up the next morning, legs tangled with hoseok and taehyung’s, head pounding. groaning, he carefully untangled himself from the still asleep males, ignoring the headache that was currently pounding against his skull.

  he trudged into the kitchen to find jungkook already up, flitting around the space. normally, jimin would’ve laughed at the sight of the latter in a frilly white apron, if it weren’t for the seething migraine in his head. “morning, jimin, did you sleep well? it looked like you were comfortable.” jungkook teased, waving the spatula in his right hand.

  jimin scowled and took a seat at the kitchen island, nearly slamming his head on the counter as he put his head down, the granite cool against his forehead. “rough night?” jungkook asked nonchalantly, and jimin groaned. “shut up, kook, you were the one who suggested we drink.”

  he could practically imagine jungkook rolling his eyes. “yeah, but you were the one who decided to accept the offer to drink, so that’s on you, park.” jimin looked up, glaring at the former, who just gave him a shit-eating grin before turning back to whatever food he was cooking.

   “it’s eight a.m. and you idiots are already bickering?” a voice said from the kitchen doorway, and jimin looked over to see you standing there, rubbing at your eyes. he nearly missed the way jungkook’s eyes seemed to light up when he saw you. “y/n, did you sleep well?” jimin hid an amused smirk at the way the former’s voice grew impossibly soft and fond.

   “i did, thank you kook. by the way, you really didn’t have to give up your bed for me, you know. i would’ve been perfectly fine sleeping on the couch.” jimin nearly raised an eyebrow at that. for the nine years he’d known jungkook, the male had never given up his bed to anyone, not even him. what an interesting development, jimin thought amusedly, hiding his smile behind the warm mug of coffee that jungkook had placed beside him at some point, taking a small sip.

   jungkook pouted. “but i wanted to, and besides, i would’ve felt bad if i let you sleep on the couch. that shit’s uncomfy.” you sighed, moving to give the former a hug. jimin watched in amusement as jungkook returned the gesture, wrapping his arms tightly around your small frame, reaching around to turn off the stove and place the spatula he’d been holding down.

  jimin felt his face grow hot at the scene, for it seemed so intimate; the way jungkook tucked his chin on your shoulder, closing his eyes in contentment and the way you buried your face in crook of his neck. not to mention that you were quite literally wearing jungkook’s clothes.

 he tore his gaze away and feigned interest in the iron chandelier dangling from the kitchen ceiling, admiring how the crystals twinkled in the early morning sun, casting rainbow light on the smooth, white walls of jungkook’s home.

  “jimin?” jungkook asked, bringing him back to reality, and he felt his face flush in embarrassment. “y-yeah?’’ he blurted, and said male raised a questioning eyebrow. “are you okay? your face is as red as a tomato.” “ah, i’m fine, just a little hungover from last night, that’s all. i think it’s the alcohol.” jimin winced internally at his shitty excuse, but it seemed convincing enough to jungkook, as the latter didn’t press further.

  “so” you asked, pouring yourself a cup of coffee, “anyone have anything going on today?” jimin shook his head. “nope, and neither does jungkook. i’m not sure about hoseok hyung and tae though.” you laughed softly, taking a small sip of your coffee. “well, since they happen to work at the same place that i do, i happen to know their schedules.” jimin felt his face flush scarlet from embarrassment. “i’m obviously free, since work is the last place i want to be. i’m surprised he hasn’t fired me yet.” you joked, and saw jungkook wince, just slightly.

   “what about a night in? i know we kind of had one last night, but no alcohol this time.” jimin let out a relieved sigh at that. “thank fuck, i was worried that i would be hungover as shit again.” jungkook snorted, shoving the former’s shoulder lightly. “says the guy who drank like six bottles last night.” jimin rolled his eyes. “it was three, you idiot. did you ever learn to count in school?” “i did, thank you very much.” jungkook shot back, glaring playfully at his secretary.

  “are you idiots already arguing? at this hour?” a voice said from the doorway, and the three of you turned to see taehyung and hoseok standing there, rubbing the sleep out of their eyes. said males trudged into the kitchen, half-asleep, plopping unceremouniously next to you and jimin on the bar stools.

  “you both look like shit.” jungkook snickered, handing both of them cups of newly made coffee. taehyung sighed, flipping the former off as he took a long sip of his coffee. “shut up jeon, it’s too fucking early for this.” he mumbled, and jungkook just rolled his eyes. “tae, it’s 9 a.m.”

  “jungkook, i swear to god, shut the fuck up before i strangle you.” taehyung growled, but it held no heat. “kinky.” “kook i’m this fucking close to shooting you.” said male shrugged, piling pancakes onto a plate. “go ahead.” hoseok smacked taehyung lightly on the shoulder, causing the latter to cry out in protest. “cut it out, you shits are giving me a headache.” he grumbled, pressing his fingers against his temple. “hyung, do you need aspirin?” jungkook asked, already striding over to his medicine cabinet before the older male could reply.

   “i’m fine, kook, really.” hoseok started, but the younger male cut him off with a look that said”you better take some medicine before i shove it down your throat”, and the former managed a weak nod.  next to him, taehyung sighed and practically collapsed onto the counter, pillowing his head on his arms. you stifled a laugh and patted said male on the shoulder. “everything okay?”

  taehyung shook his head, mumbling something under his breath that you couldn’t quite catch. “do you need medicine?” you asked, and the former shook his head again. “i’ll be fine, i probably need to just take a nap or something.” taehyung muttered, and you rolled your eyes at his stubbornness. “kim taehyung, take some medicine before your headache gets worse.” “fine.” he huffed, standing up and shuffling over to jungkook, who just wordlessly handed him an aspirin and a glass of water. you shook your head, hiding an amused smile, and went to get ready for the day.

    namjoon drummed his thin fingers on the smooth wood of his desk, lost in thought. the morning hadn’t been anything out of the ordinary, just the same meetings and paperwork to approve and sign. for the first time in a while, he’d finally had had time to himself. namjoon sighed, running a hand through his hair, which he hadn’t bothered to style properly that morning. he considered calling yoongi, but he was probably stuck in some boring meeting, and the last thing namjoon wanted to do was annoy him further than he already had.

  the last conversation namjoon had had with you still lingered in the back of his mind, no matter how much he tried to forget it by throwing himself into his work, busying himself with boring meetings and the like. then there was that strange feeling he had, one that he couldn’t quite place. if it was guilt, or even contempt, namjoon couldn’t tell.

  the one thing namjoon did know was that yoongi was right, but that not he’d admit such a thing out loud. he was a massive idiot for even trying to deny the possibility of having romantic feelings for someone, especially if said someone was his secretary. however, namjoon knew that trying to deny it was futile at this point. he’d tried to brush his feelings away, throwing himself into work, but the attempt was only in vain.

  it was undeniable; the dread pooling in his stomach, the anger that surged through his veins whenever he’d see you with anyone, especially jungkook, and the way his seemingly cold heart seemed to thaw, slowly, but surely, whenever you were around. but because he was a fucking moron, namjoon tried to deflect those feelings by being his usual asshole self.

  he’d been the sole cause of the angry and frustrated tears that had streamed down your face that day, for your pain, and namjoon would be lying if he didn’t feel an immense amount of guilt after you had stormed out of his office. for the first time in years, namjoon let unshed tears fall, and buried his face in his hands. how was he ever going to try to love someone, when he couldn’t even love himself?

 namjoon’s body shook with broken sobs, and he wrapped his arms around himself, as if doing so would protect him the cruel reality he was living. his mother’s last words to him rang in his mind. you’re a failure, completely useless, you’ll never be like your brother. no one will ever love you. 

 a/n: AHHHH ok this fic is finally done!!! however, the story itself isn’t over! i decided to make a sequel fic!! i feel like the ending of this was shit but i hope you guys like the fic regardless! and i had so much fun writing it! i feel so bad that i held this fic off for so long, i was working on this fic for MONTHS+ anyways, i hope all of you are staying safe, and thank you for always supporting my stories<3 and i cannot wait to write the other fics in the kdramas and bangtan series!! 

tagging: @kithtaehyung , @suhdays , @ddaechwita , @sketchguk, @wwilloww @writtenwhalien , @sunshinejunghoseokie , @codeinebelle , @lovetrivia , @papillonsgf , @arcticguk , @jtrbluv , @honeyj00ns ,  @jungkooksbroski , @jksmoongf , @rapmooni, @ughseoks-main , @cafemiya, @monvante  @sweetheartjeongguk , @imyourhobiii , @blushingkoo​ , @kooksmos , @lurejoon , @bangtanhome , @joyfulhopelox, @mochi-molala , @kithtaehyung​ , @lovetrivia, @joonsrack , @nomseok , @taeyo95 ,  @missgeniality , @balenciaguks​ , @hobipaint​ , @ressjeon​ , @kookskingdom​ + anyone else who wants to be tagged<3