#azriel x elain
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My sisters in Christ 👏 Azriel BLUSHED when Elain called his biggest insecurity Beautiful.
There was never another endgame option for him after that. MMCs do not do that willy nilly.
Side note of Elain note shying or balking away from the big bad scarred shadowsinger. Super important note.
#elriel#azriel#elain archeron#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#pro elain#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar#elain x azriel#azriel x elain#acowar#a court of wings and ruin
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Elain: *telling Rhys Cassian is dead over the phone*
Cassian: Is he crying? Is he crying??
Elain: A little.
Cassian: *grabbing the phone from Elain*: You should be WAILING, you stone cold bitch!
Cassian : *slams the phone*
Cassian *to Elain*: Now call Az.
#pro elriel#elriel#azriel x elain#acotar#incorrect quotes#cassian#pro Rhys#pro inner circle#pro feyre#pro rhysand
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SWNL Bonus Chapters Complete 🩷
She'll Wait No Longer: Bonus Chapters | Chapter 6
Chapter 6: The Beach
Summary: What Azriel did- #6. Azriel and Elain make love on a beach of the Summer Court. Thank you again to @nicawritesandwhines for the setting idea 💖💖💖
This completes my 3-work series Wildflowers In The Shadows. Thank you for all the love and support.
CW: None
This one is wrapped up, my loves! Thank you to all who read. It was a very fun challenge to write 6 different and engaging smut chapters lmaooo. Now I have more time and brain space for new fics and more S&S chapters.
@elriel-month
Preview below the cut:
“Did you know,” he started, settling himself between her hips and kissing the swell of each breast. “That I spent night after night,” he continued, lining himself up at her entrance as she bent a knee and hooked a leg over his hips, “both trying and trying not to imagine what your beautiful face might look like as I entered you?”
Elain’s eyes softened further at his confession, and she tangled her hands in his hair. Azriel leaned down to press one tender kiss to her lips before drawing his head back to watch her face as he pushed his cock into her. Her perfect lips parted on an exhale as he slid into her slowly, studying her face all the while.
“Even better than I ever could have imagined,” he whispered, running a thumb over her lips as he seated himself completely within her.
They took a moment to get adjusted before he started moving. He made love to her slowly, sliding his length out of her and then rolling his hips to push gently back in, without breaking his gaze from her face. Her hair was fanned out behind her on the soft pillow of warm sand. Her ivory, freckled skin glowed in the moonlight. The sounds of lapping waves intermingled with her quiet breathing as he slowly, slowly rolled into and out of her. Savoring every inch of contact. Every sensation.
#elriel#elain archeron#azriel shadowsinger#elriel fanfic#elriel fic#acotar#azriel x elain#elriel smut#swnl#she'll wait no longer
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Azriel sat at his desk in the quiet stillness of his office at the House of Wind, his chair tilted back as he rubbed his temples. His shadows moved with lazy precision, filing away reports and correspondence into neat piles across the room. The low hum of their work usually soothed him, but this afternoon, his mind felt too crowded, restless. His hazel eyes kept drifting back to the small, unassuming book resting on his desk, its leather cover soft and worn from countless hands before hers. Her hands. He hadn’t opened it yet. Couldn’t bring himself to.
It felt… sacred, somehow. The pressed flowers she’d mentioned marked her favorite pages, each one holding a glimpse of her thoughts, her feelings. A piece of herself she’d offered to him without hesitation. And yet, every time he reached for it, his hand faltered. It wasn’t fear, exactly—Azriel had long since learned to face fear. But this? This was something he didn’t know how to hold, didn’t know how to accept.
Her gift had been so simple, so pure, and it left him raw in a way nothing else ever had. His thumb brushed idly over the ridge of his scarred fingers as his gaze lingered on the book’s soft edges. He wasn’t sure what unsettled him more—the thought of opening it, or the fact that he wanted to.
Wanted to know what she loved.
The thought alone was enough to pull him from his thoughts, his shadows stilling momentarily as if they too were waiting for him to make a move. But before he could reach for the book, before he could let himself give in, a faint disturbance rippled through his shadows, sharp and insistent.
Nuala’s voice came through the veil of silence, urgent and quick. “Azriel.”
No matter how many times he saw them slip in and out of homes like wraiths, he was always startled by their sudden appearance. He straightened instantly, his body coiling with tension as his shadows swirled tightly around him. “What is it?”
“It’s Elain. She’s having a vision, but won’t come out of it. We thought about getting Rhysand and Feyre, but Elain told us not to bother them…” Nuala began, her words tumbling over each other in a rare display of panic.
Azriel was already on his feet. “No, let me handle it.” Shadows surged around him as he gripped Nuala’s arm, shadow walking them both directly to the garden.
The sight that greeted him made his stomach drop.
Elain sat on the ground, hunched over with her long hair falling around her face like a curtain. Vines—at least they looked like vines—were coiling up around her body, pale green tendrils tipped with sharp, dark thorns. Cerridwen knelt beside her, holding Elain’s hand tightly, even as blood dripped from cuts on her own palm where the thorns had already struck.
“Cerridwen!” Nuala cried, rushing to her sister’s side.
“She started shaking, and when I tried to hold her, the thorns just...appeared. I couldn’t pull away fast enough,” Cerridwen explained breathlessly, her normally calm tone fraying at the edges.
“Thorns?” Azriel said, stepping closer. His eyes locked on Elain, on the vines curling protectively around her form. “How…”
“I don’t know,” Cerridwen interrupted, her face pale as she glanced at her bleeding hand. “But don’t touch her. The thorns will—”
Azriel ignored her, dropping to one knee beside Elain. He didn’t care about thorns or vines or anything else. He had to reach her. Gently, he reached for her face, cupping her cheek in his scarred hand and brushing her hair aside. His shadows whispered in alarm, coiling tighter around him as he tilted her head up. Her eyes were white. Not the soft brown he had come to admire in every stolen glance. Just white, endless and bright. Her lips were slightly parted, her breath shallow and uneven, and her body trembled as though caught in some silent storm.
“Elain,” he said softly, forcing his voice to remain calm despite the panic clawing at him. “Elain, can you hear me? I’m here. You’re safe. I’ll stay as long as you need me, but I need you to come back to me.”
The vines shifted, curling tighter around her body and around his legs. He barely noticed them.
“What’s happening?” Nuala whispered, her voice sharp with worry.
“I don’t know,” Cerridwen admitted, shaking her head. “But why aren’t the thorns stabbing him? They didn’t hesitate to cut me.”
Azriel didn’t look up from Elain’s face, but he felt the tension thrumming between the two wraiths. His shadows stirred as if mirroring his own fear, brushing against her hair, her shoulders, as if trying to comfort her.
“Have you read anything about this?” Cerridwen asked, her voice rising slightly.
“No,” Azriel said grimly. “So little is known about Seers. And even less about what happens when they have visions like this.” He paused, his voice tightening. “Time doesn’t exist the same way for them during a vision. A few minutes for us could be hours—weeks��for her. And there are cases…”
He didn’t finish. Cases of Seers trapped too long in their visions. Cases that ended in madness. In death. Nuala began pacing, her steps quick and agitated. “What if we bring something strong-smelling? Like smelling salts. Or splash water on her face—anything to snap her out of it!”
“That’s ridiculous,” Cerridwen snapped. “We’re not splashing water on her."
“Well, do you have any better ideas, Cer? Because it’s been six minutes, and she’s still out cold!”
“Both of you, stop,” Azriel growled, his voice low and firm. The twins fell silent, their eyes darting toward him. “We need to think this through. Carefully.”
Cerridwen knelt beside him, her voice softer now. “What about Madja? She might know what to do.”
“No.” Azriel’s response was instant, sharp. “That’s a last resort. Madja will have to tell Rhys and Feyre, and you know Elain doesn’t want them to know. Not yet.”
Cerridwen huffed, crossing her arms. “If this lasts another ten minutes, I’m getting her, whether you like it or not.”
He didn’t respond. He understood Cerridwen’s frustration, but he wouldn’t let this escalate—not unless it was absolutely necessary. He knew why Elain wanted to keep it all a secret, but he would be lying if he wasn't fully onboard with the decision. He knew getting more information would mean other courts finding out, which Rhys wanted to avoid, but he also had been worried something like this would happen. That it was only a matter of time before Elain had sunk into a deeper vision, lost in the void of her mind, of futures merging together.
“Fuck.” Azriel muttered under his breath, his voice raw and strained. “Elain, please…” His throat tightened as he leaned down, his shadows curling protectively around her limp form. Without thinking, he pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head, so subtle, so fleeting, that he doubted even Nuala and Cerridwen noticed. It wasn’t a calculated gesture; it was instinct, a desperate attempt to reach her, to bring her back.
"Azriel!" Her gasp tore through the garden, her voice sharp and full of breath as though she’d been pulled from drowning. Azriel snapped back, leaning just far enough to see her face, and relief punched through him like a thunderclap. Her eyes—brown again, warm and familiar—met his, wide and full of fear and confusion. The vines that had wrapped around her and him began to loosen, untangling themselves and sinking back into the earth as if retreating from a fight.
“Elain!” Nuala and Cerridwen rushed forward, their twin voices carrying a blend of worry and urgency.
“Elain! Are you alright?” Nuala dropped to her knees beside her sister, her hands fluttering as she scanned Elain’s face and body for injuries. “Cerridwen, go get her water! And something to eat!”
“I’m fine,” Elain murmured weakly, though her trembling hands and pale complexion said otherwise. She hadn’t moved from where she slumped against Azriel, as if the world hadn’t yet caught up to her. Her eyes, however, were locked on his. “I heard you... I felt you,” she said softly, her words so full of certainty that Azriel’s chest tightened.
“You felt me?” he repeated, his voice low. His hands still cradled her face, his thumbs gently brushing the edges of her jaw. He didn’t care if the twins were watching. “Here, Elain. Drink this.” Cerridwen knelt beside her, pressing the glass into her hands. Azriel finally sat back, giving her space but remaining close, his shadows refusing to leave her side.
Elain lifted the glass with shaking hands and sipped carefully, the tremor in her fingers steadying as the cool water touched her lips. “The vines…” she murmured, her gaze dropping to the ground where remnants of the dark, twisting roots lingered. “They… they happened again.”
Azriel’s head tilted slightly, his focus sharpening. “Again?” he asked, his voice even, though a storm brewed behind his hazel eyes.
Elain hesitated, guilt flickering across her features. “A few weeks ago. I woke up, and they were wrapped around my bed. I thought… I thought it was still part of my dream.” Her voice grew quieter, her fingers brushing the hem of her cloak as she looked down.
“You thought wrong,” Cerridwen said with a soft laugh, holding up her bandaged hand as evidence. “Those thorns drew blood before I could even get close.”
Elain’s head snapped up, her gaze darting between Cerridwen and Azriel. “Thorns?”
“Yes,” Azriel confirmed. “But they didn’t hurt me. They unraveled the moment I touched you.”
Her brows furrowed, her lips parting slightly as if to question why. But instead, she said, “What does it mean?”
“I don’t know,” Azriel admitted, the words bitter on his tongue. It wasn’t often that he was without answers, and the fact that this was one of those rare times—that it involved Elain—stung all the more. He ran a hand through his hair, glancing down at the earth beneath them as though it might provide some clue. “What did you see?”
Elain’s breath caught, her hands gripping the edge of her cloak. “It was so vivid,” she said, her voice shaking. ���I’ve never seen anything so vivid before.”
Azriel leaned closer, his attention fully hers. “Start from the beginning,” he said gently.
Elain nodded, swallowing hard before she began. “There was a woman… with red hair. Long, red hair. She wasn’t fully fae, but she wasn’t mortal either. She came from beyond—I don’t know what that means, but it was as if she didn’t belong to this world.” Her brow creased, and she rubbed her temples as if the memories were slipping away.
“And then there was a sword,” she continued, her voice faintly stronger. “It… it hummed. Like Truth-Teller, but louder, deeper. And it was in a cave—an enormous cave with carvings all over the walls. Symbols I didn’t recognize. Someone else was there, following you and the woman. I couldn’t see them, but I could feel them. The caves.. they were heavy and suffocating. You and she—you were searching for something." She broke off with a shudder, her hands beginning to tremble again. “It’s slipping away,” she murmured. “I’m trying to remember, but…”
"Shh, Elain, it's okay. You don't have to remember it all. It's okay." Azriel's voice was quiet, steady—an anchor in the chaos. He crouched in front of her, trying to soothe the tears pooling in her wide, terrified eyes.
"She needed help. She needed us. I don't know if we helped her��" Elain’s words spilled out quickly, her voice trembling as if she was still trapped in the vision.
"It's okay," Azriel assured her, though the knot in his chest tightened at her words. "We’ll write it all down. Everything you remember. That way, if you see it again, we’ll be ready." He glanced at Nuala, who gave a quick nod and slipped away to retrieve a notebook.
"I… I don’t understand what it means," Elain whispered, her voice barely audible.
"You don’t have to. Not yet." Azriel’s hands ached to hold hers, to steady her as she seemed to crumble under the weight of what she’d seen. She looked so fragile, so shaken, and it ripped through him in a way nothing else ever had.
It wasn’t the fear of the unknown that gutted him, or even the helplessness of not having answers. It was seeing her like this—raw and vulnerable, stripped bare by something neither of them could control. It tore at him, gnawed at his carefully constructed walls. He wanted to pick her up, carry her to her bed, and hold her until the tremors stopped. To promise her that she would never be alone in this. But how could he, when he didn’t even know how to fix it?
The vines that had wrapped around her and the ground were now fully gone, leaving only faint indentations in the soil.
Read The Rest on Ao3

#elain#azriel x elain#elain x azriel#elriel#azriel#actoar fanfic#elainarcheron#acotar#pro elain#elain acotar#elain archeron#pro azriel#pro elriel#elain the seer#acotar series#nuala and cerridwen
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"...halting him mere inches from Elain's sweet mouth."

#Him describing her mouth as sweet is the sweetest thing ever.#he's obsessed#pro azriel#azriel#elain archeron#pro elain archeron#elain x azriel#azriel x elain#elriel#pro elriel#acotar#azriel bonus chapter
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I want you to want me as I want you.
Desperately.
I want to make you shiver from my touch.
I want to hear your voice, breathless and shaky.
Oh, I want you to say my name like a prayer.
Full of devotion.
—Azriel to Elain
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✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ And I wouldn't marry me, either part 2
You were Azriel's mate, but it took losing you three times for him to realise.
[thank you for the love on part one, I’m so happy Azriel is getting the love he deserves!!!! This is another long one, another 6k. But I’ve learnt a new love for writing about him and i have so many ideas. This is a continuation and final part, part one here. Enjoy]
warnings: references to sexual assault and references to suicide. nothing explicit but please don't read if this is sensitive to you.

The third time Azriel almost lost you, he was pretty sure he lost a part of himself.
They'd all gone into battle, knowing that Hybern had the numbers to match and the advantage. But they'd all gone to fight in spite of that.
It had took some time for you to get the boys to agree to let you fight- you'd trained and grew up with all three of them but this was fighting on another scale. Although, if they were going, there really wasn't much they could say to get you to stay.
You were clad in Illyrian leathers just like them, armed with weapons and power.
The first battle was over quicker than you'd anticipated. Hybern soldiers surrendered, Tarquin drowned them on land. You'd suffered little, only falling on bed exhausted by the end of the day. Sadly, you were sharing a tent with Cassian and Azriel. It was like you were young again, all sleeping in the same room. It was a habit you'd done when you were young- all looking out and protecting each other.
The only difference was that Cassian snored as he got older.
But the next battle was worse.
It was bigger than last. Hybern's forces had doubled, seemingly at of nowhere, cutting their forces apart.
It was chaos, everywhere. Every corner there was fighting and bleeding and dying. There was pain all around you. Pain you felt like it was your own.
You used all your power, as much as you could to kill and protect. From the corner of your eyes you could see Azriel fight. Your Azriel, weaving in and out of people. Your mate. He was alive. And that was all you cared about.
But you didn't realise how much you'd been pushing herself and draining your power. Every time you stopped, you swayed on your feet, stumbling.
One of Hyberns men came for you as you were crouched and you barley blocked with your sword, rolling onto your back and slashing his arm off.
Not before he landed a sword in your thigh.
It had been deep burning and you yelled, yanking it out. Even with the wound, you kept fighting and fighting your way through until you saw a blaze of red and a familiar cry.
Cassian.
He'd been run through.
It was easy to push past exhaustion and winnow to his side, killing the man who'd been near him and any others that had been close enough. You fall to your knees next to him. 'Cassian, you prick.'
'You kiss your mate with that mouth,' he gasped. He was the only one who knew about Az and the bond. The only one you'd allow to make jokes.
You look down to his wound and gaged. Mother above, his guts were hanging out. 'No, no, no, come on, big guy, you have to stand.'
He groaned. 'Yea, don't think I can do that, sweetheart,' his eyes, lulled back.
You slap him in the face. Perhaps you wouldn't have felt guilt if it weren't for the way his eyes widened. 'You know I hate being called that.'
He laughed as his stomach and all its contents heaved out. Ignoring the pain in you, you hold his stomach, keeping him together. 'I promised Nesta i'd look after her,' he said. 'Please look after her.'
'Do it yourself,' you groaned.
Finally, Azriel came to your side and picked Cassian up like it was nothing, flying him to the tents. If only you still had your wings, you could have done it, saved him quicker.
Then, you were thrown back into the battle. Covered in his blood and yours, you fought through them all, slashing and killing like it was nothing. Like you had no reason to bat an eyelash at anything happening.
Eventually, it ended, but you couldn't even concentrate on who won or how much you'd lost. Your head ached, your leg was tied up in a bloody bandage ripped from your clothes. But none of that mattered.
Cassian was in bed, healing slowly. But he would live, everyone could tell. Especially with the way he picked fights. He argued with Rhys about throwing himself into danger, him and Nesta appeared to be having words with their eyes. Even Mor and Feyre argued. You were the only one silent with Azriel in the back. Too exhausted to even open your mouth.
That night, you tied up your wounds and fell asleep without changing.
It only got worse.
Elain- Feyre's sister and the most precious- was stolen from Hybern. You had only agreed to go and save her with a few selected others because your mate was in that few selective others.
It hadn't escaped your notice how he looked at her, was watchful over her like he once was with you. You saw the tick in his jaw at the news she was gone. You knew that this was the reason you hadn't told him. Knowing that he deserved someone like her, better than you. Kind and hopeful. You weren't. So the only thing you could do was watch your mate find love in someone else.
And you'd do it grudgingly but happy for him.
Azriel had took of with her. You and your high lady fought, fought through ash arrows and everything.
'You should get out of her, y/n,' said Feyre.
You groaned as an arrow skimmed your shoulder. Another had already got your hip. 'If you try to order me out of here, i'll be really pissed off at you.'
'I don't care if it gets you out!' she snapped, arguing like a real sister would.
'Yea, well- I was never one to listen to Rhys either.'
And Azriel was gone. Everything was fine.
You and Feyre ran, ran even as Tamlin defended you, ran until-
An arrow hit you in the back, straight to one of your old wing scars.
You tumbled, rolling on the ground as it broke and imbedded in your back. You screamed, in spite of yourself.
'You have to fly,' someone was telling you. Or saying it in general, frankly you had no idea what was going on. 'You have to take her.'
You rolled onto your stomach, groaning and trying to get yourself up. There was blood running down your arm, how did that get there?
'Y'n.'
You groaned, 'Azriel. I can't fly.'
'I know, I know- i've got you.' He picked you up, arm under your legs and around your shoulders.
'Elian, Azriel-'
'Feyre has her,' he told you. He sounded angry. Or afraid. Somehow his emotions were very easy to mix up.
'Feyre isn't strong enough.'
'She'll have to be.'
'You should take them, Elian-'
'I don't give a fuck about Elian right now, y'n.'
Just like that, he took off with you in his arms and your blood raining down on the camp of Hybern. You could barley hear anything over the wind... but you could feel it.
Something had tugged painfully at the bond, throwing you into a scream. Something had happened to Azriel. You twisted in his arms, finding gashing claw marks in his back from one of the hounds that had chased them down. His face was bleached white in pain, his hold on you tight.
Glancing around, you could just see Feyre in a blur of people.
'Azriel-' you gasped. He was in pain, so much pain.
He didn't say anything, just squeezed you tighter and looking ahead, barking orders as Feyre flew for the first time in need, in desperation. You remembered what that was like, trusting your life in them. But Azriel's wings, they were bleeding out. You remembered the pain. You'd go through it every day to spare him a minute of it.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
You and Azriel landed back in the camp in a blur of pain.
Even with him leaving a trail of blood, he managed to set you down like you were porcelain. You didn't cry out. You didn't yell for help. You threw his arm over your shoulder and supported him.
Nesta and Rhys rushed to Feyre.
You hated your brother for a long moment.
Elain wondered over, chained but whole.
Azriel moved from you, checking on Elian. You only managed to watch them as she kissed his cheek.
The pain came to you then. Your head, shoulder, back. You turned from the crowd of family. Elain moved to hug her sister, Rhys stayed at Feyre's side.
Thesan, someone you barley knew as more than a healer, came to you first but you pushed him away, pushed him to Azriel. 'His wings. Heal him, or i'll rip you to pieces.'
He didn't have to be told twice.
You stumbled your way to camp, to your little tent. You didn't share it with Cassian anymore as he was still healing and Azriel would be a while- needing healing of your own.
You collapsed on the bed, promising to look after yourself- just after your nap.
You were so fast asleep you didn’t even hear Azriel come in and sigh at the sight of you…
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Azriel was fighting when it happened. Specifically, when it snapped.
Mate. Mate. Mate.
No, he wasn't completely healed. But he had to fight. He wouldn't push himself, he knew that would be stupid. But he wouldn't watch as everyone fought. As you fought. He'd hardly seen you. He knew your back would be in pain. He knew you'd be in pain and you were still fighting, so far from him and out of reach.
He was thinking of you when it snapped.
Mate. Mate. Mate.
His soul sang it, his heart rose with it.
His shadows whispered it.
Mate. Mate. Mate.
y/n.
And the first thing he felt over the bond wasn't happiness or love. It was pain. It was death.
Mate. Mate. Mate.
In spite of the pain in his wings, how he'd been told not to fly, he did. He jumped into the skies, soaring over armies and dead to find you. He followed that pain, he followed the bond until he found you.
You, lying in your own blood. Again.
He fell next to you, his power eradicating anywhere near you. They dissovled, the ground cracked under him and his syphons shone in raw power.
'y/n?' he held your body, shaking you. Blood, so much. A sword had torn through your gut. 'Don't do this to me.'
Mate. Mate. Mate.
You cough, a thin stream of blood rolling from your lips. 'Azriel?'
'You're mine,' it was the first thing he could bring himself to say. 'You're my mate. Y/n. You have to hold on, ok? I'm gonna-gonna get you to safety.'
Something like a laugh escaped you, your body wracking with it. 'Of course, finally snaps for you as i'm dying.'
Snaps for you. Mate. Mate.
She knows, his shadows sung. She's known.
Azriel called out to Rhys in every way he could. 'We're gonna be fine. We're gonna be mates, y/n. You have to live, you understand?'
'Not really.' your eyes flutter shut.
'No!' he yelled, shaking you again.
'What's happened?' Rhysand landed next to him, blanking when he saw you in Azriel's arms, bleeding to death. How many times did this have to happen? How many times would you throw yourself into danger?
'She's my mate,' Azriel repeated. He tested it out loud, speaking it to the mother. How cruel was she? to give him this then try to take her away. Well, the mother wouldn't get that chance. Azriel would fight her if she tried to lay a hand on your life.
'What?' said Rhys.
'My mate,' he all but growled as Rhys got closer.
He put a hand on the back of Azriels neck, a hand on your head. 'We have to save her, Az.' he knew all about mating of course, knew that Azriel wanted nobody around her. But this was too save her. 'She's my sister too, the last sister I have. I care about her to.'
Azriel wanted to throw a thousand insults his way but refrained. If not because he was high lord, but also because you were dying.
They got you to safety, Azriel carrying you through to a tent.
'Y/n?!' Cassian rushed over, seeing you in his brothers arms, bleeding out and unresponsive.
Azriel pushed past him, setting you down on the bed. 'Get everyone, every healer now.' He had no idea who he was trying to demand, but he couldn’t watch this, couldn’t see you in.
You were still in your bed. Behind him, Feyre rushed to her mate, wrapping her arms around his torso as your brother stared at you in muted horror.
Azriel was leaning over you, sitting on the edge of the bed. ‘She’s my mate.'
'What?' Said Cassian, ‘She told you?'
Azriel felt the world stop around him. Not did you know about the bond and hadn’t told him, you’d told someone else? Cassian? His hand stilled in brushing your hair back, his shadows coaxing you instead.
Rhysand spoke what Azriel wanted to scream. 'You knew?'
'She-She told me,'
Azriel had always had an iron fist control on his emotions, as relied on to be spy master, he had to. But his patience was hanging on by a thread. You were still bleeding out and nobody had come and Cassian knew. Cassian knew about his mate before he did.
His shadows caressed you and, leaving you in the coolness of their touch, he leapt up, marching around the bed toward him.
Rhys was quicker, a hand on Azriels chest to stop him. 'Calm, brother.'
'Calm?' He seethed. 'When-how long have you known?' He shouted.
Cassian breathed out, pushing his hair back . His wings were tucked in behind him. 'She told me, before she went under the mountain.'
Even Rhysand let him go, blowing out air and throwing his arms over his head as Feyre gasped.
Azriel stumbled, a hand to his chest. His shadows were divided between him and caring for you. 'Fifty years,' he gasped.
You’d known for fifty years- possibly longer and hadn’t said a word.
He was panicking, his breath escaping him. His shadows settled uneasy around him. And the only person who was capable of calming him was laying unconscious.
Thesan burst in, knowing the injured already and working on you quickly.
Azriel almost launched at him, just for touching you. The reasonable part of him knew he needed to touch to heal, but the part that was your mate wanted him dead.
Cassian held him back, physically.
Azriel glowered at him. 'I wouldn’t touch me if i were you, brother,' he practically spat the words.
Rhysand left Feyre with a kiss on her cheek, coming to Azriel who was looking over you on the other side. 'Az, you need to rest-you’re hurt, too, remember?'
He shook his head, staring down at you. Mother above you were pale, so pale. 'I-I can’t feel anything Rhys, I can’t feel her through the bond.'
'My sister is a fighter, she’ll make it through.'
Azriel scoffed. His shadows were caressing up and down your arm. ‘Don’t pretend you’ve ever cared about her like a brother.'
Rhysand inhaled sharply. This was just fear, he told himself. 'Azriel.'
'No,' he said, his finger brushing back your hair. 'You only care about her when she’s dying and all y/n does is worship you- ever since you were children.'
Cassian tried to advance, 'Azriel, you wouldn’t be saying any of this if y/n wasn’t hurt.'
He laughed, bitterly. 'No, I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t have to. I’d bite my tongue. But your sister is dying and the last time you cared was the last time she almost died- it killed her to lose her wings and you were never there! And you teach your mate to fly right in front of her!'
Rhys growled. ‘Don’t bring my mate into this!'
‘You’ve brought mine into this!' He yelled. 'Everything she does is for you. Working for you. My mate followed you down to the mountain even when you didn’t care.'
'Of course I cared.'
'Then why did she feel so alone down there!'
‘How would you know, Azriel? You weren’t there!'
'Because I know her, bond or not. And you’ve been otherwise occupied.'
Cassian moved between the two, holding them apart. 'None of this matters to y/n does it.'
Azriel blankes them all, settling next to you. He vaguely heard Cassian send Rhysand and Feyre away. He felt him longer before he felt him leave.
And then all Azriel could feel, was you.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
You felt pain first. The steady thumping of it through your body. It started in your leg, numbing it. Then, her back ached- a familiar pain you'd felt before. It sent panic through you before you realised they can't take your wings twice.
Then, it was in your gut, stinging. Just the thought of moving was hurting- aching.
There was a coldness around you, draped over like shadows. Shadows...
That's when you felt the tug that you'd neglected to feel for more than half a century.
The bond. There was finally something tied to the other end.
The shadows around you must've known you were awake as they grew frantic around you.
You opened your eyes, slowly, afraid to what you may see. Afraid to the eyes you'll have to meet.
Azriel was sat on a chair next to you, bare chested with only bandages around him. Immediately, you were at a disadvantage. He was looking at you, dark eyes pouring into yours as his hands curled around shadows.
'What happened?' you asked.
'You were run through,' he said, voice wavering.
'Oh.'
'You're my mate.'
Your eyes flickered away, staring at your tent. 'Oh.'
'That's it?' he whispered. There was some heart-break tainting his voice. 'You're not gonna say something?'
You pulled the blanket over you, daring to move to sit up. He shifted, but his shadows helped you. 'What do you want me to say, Az?'
'Why did you tell Cassian and not me?' he asked. 'Why didn't you tell me, for fifty years?'
'It's-it's not a big deal.'
'Not a big deal?' he all but seethed. 'I'd say finding your mate is a pretty big thing, y/n. It's the person to spend the rest of your life with.'
'Can we not, do this now?' you winced, as the words left your mouth.
'You're right, maybe we should wait another fifty years to bring it up when you're dying.' you've never heard him be so cruel, you'd never even argued with him before this.
'I wasn't dying,' you mumbled.
He scoffed. 'You had an infected wound in your leg that you didn't tell anyone about. An ash arrow was imbedded in your back. Imbedded! You didn't see anyone about it and then- you run into battle and get yourself stabbed.'
'I didn't get myself stabbed!' you argued, your temper rising above all other judgment. 'I didn't rush out in there, wanting to die!'
'I held you as you bled out!' he yelled, standing up from his seat. You were swinging your legs over the bed, ignoring every twinge in your body. 'Do you have any idea what that's like? Not even to hold you as you die in my arms the first time but the second. And to know this time, I was holding my mate?'
You bit down on your lip. He had to use the word with such care and love even when angry. You could feel it. For once, guessing his emotions wasn't needed as you felt it all. The taunt anger in him, the pull of anxiety and above all else, the weight of his love.
Azriel walked around you. 'Please, you have to tell me. Why didn't you say something to me? Why wouldn't you tell me you're my mate? Am I that repulsive to you?'
'What?'
He gulped.
You shook your head as he knelt in front of you, shadows pooled around the two of you, as if they were trying to hold the two of you together. You took his hands, holding them and let something like love flow down the bond. 'You are the most beautiful thing in this world. Something better than me. I wouldn't burden you with that.'
He rose his gaze to you. 'Burden me?'
'Do you think i've enjoyed lying to you?' you ask, finally finding your words. 'Do you think I've liked being your mate and never being with you? That I left you for fifty years and thought of you every moment of every day, all day long. That when I come back I wonder if you or Mor had grown closer? Or if Elian would finally tell you how much she loves you? It's been eating me alive. But it's a small price to pay.'
Azriel grasped at his words, chocking on them. 'Elian is nothing to me, nothing.'
You pushed yourself up, using his shoulder to steady yourself before you move around him. 'Why? Have you only just decided that because I’m your mate? That’s not how it should go, Azriel.'
He was following you around your tent as you slipped on armour and leathers over your night dress. ‘I want you, only you.'
'Because of the bond?'
'Because I’ve always only wanted you!'
You laugh. 'No, you haven’t.'
'If we’d talked about this maybe fifty years ago you’d know that!'
You shook your head. Perhaps a part of you didn't want to believe him and all those wasted years at your fault, but you didn't want to believe his words either. Because what did that mean? That he loved you and wanted you. But that seemed just as impossible to you. How could he want someone so wrecked who'd done nothing but run away from her feelings and does nothing to make anyone happy?
'I don't want you to feel like that,' said Azriel, approaching her. She thought she'd spoken aloud before she realised he could feel everything that was hers. She'd only ever had to shield her thoughts from her brother- and he rarely sort her thoughts. 'Please, please-' he took your shoulders, turning you around and gently resting his head on yours.
You could feel his warm breath over your lips. You almost lost all resolve, with him that close. You'd never been so close to him, close enough to touch. To kiss. To know finally what it mean to have that deep connection that everyone was meant for.
One person in the whole world to belong to.
And he was stuck with her.
'Azriel-'
'Whatever you're thinking about yourself, i've thought about me a thousand times. And ever since we were kids you've always stopped me from thinking that. You've always told me what I was worth,' he whispered. His hands were wondering down your arms, sending shivers down you. He could've been doing it on purpose, distracting you. 'Why won't you accept it for yourself?'
You gulped down every uneasy thought. 'Because you're good, Az and i'm-'
'You're everything.'
'I'm not,' you look up at him, his own face blurry from your tears unwilling to fall. 'I'm not a fighter, i'm afraid of pain. And I could never be a leader, because i'm scared of losing people. I'm terrified about it half the time. Why do you think I followed Rhys down to that stupid party that I knew I wouldn't come back from? Because he'd do the same for me? We both know he wouldn't. But what would losing him mean for you? or Cass, or Mor? I was a coward and I wanted to hide from all the pain his leaving would have caused.'
Azriel shook his head, words sinking in. You were comparing yourself, to warriors like him and Cass, to the high lord- your own brother. 'It was unbearable without you. Maybe if it was just Rhysand i'd have still been able to be spymaster, because that's what he needed. But when I realised you'd gone to, it ruined me,' he admitted. 'I didn't care what you would've wanted, because you weren't here to tell me.'
You rub at your forehead, the tension creating a pain in your already aching body.
'And to anyone who made you feel inferior or worthless, i'll kill them,' he said. It was a shine of the real Azriel. The one who made a promise and never broke it.
You smirk. 'Can't kill the high lord.'
'No,' huffed Azriel, like it was a mild inconvenience. 'But I sure can punch him in the face.'
You laughed at that and Azriel smiled. He'd cracked you.
But your amusement dropped quickly, he felt it like a penny dropping. He let go of you as you turned away, wiping at your eyes. He didn't want to see you cry, didn't want to be the one to make you upset. He only wanted to make you feel loved.
'This isn't how I wanted this to go.'
Azriel suddenly felt conscious of himself. Maybe this wasn't so much about what you felt, maybe it was more about what you felt toward him. 'You really hate the mating bond that much?'
You look over to him. 'Being your mate is my greatest honour. But I don't want you to love me just because you have to.'
'It's not that-'
'And I know you're gonna keep saying that.'
'Until you believe me,' he assured her. 'Even if I have to tell you every day until I die.'
'I can't ask you to do that.'
He smiled at you, a heart-breaking smile of love. 'You haven't.'
You open your mouth to say something, but you're interrupted by Cassain poking his head through the tent flaps. The rest of his whole body was hidden, only showing his bronze face and hair framing him. There was a sheepish smile on his lips.
Azriel huffed. 'Cassian.'
'What? It didn't sound like much love making going on.'
'Mother above,' you sighed.
'What?' whined Cassian. 'I'm just saying, didn't sound like I was interrupting anything.'
'Personally I didn't know he was capable of saying that many words,' said another voice, familiar and dull. Nesta.
You frown. 'I'm sorry, is the whole camp out there.' You storm out, without Azriel to stop you.
He let you get away, again, and now there was no way he'd get you to accept the bond until the battle was done.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
The next time you and Azriel spoke, the war was over.
Elian had stabbed Hybern, Nesta had delivered the killing blow, to the head. And your brother had died.
For those few minutes of his death you wanted Feyre weep for him as you stood paralyzed, unable to move. This was the brother you worshiped, the one you’d follow to the end of the world. Did he know that when he went where you could not follow?
Feyre had done everything she could, she begged for his life back. And when her wish was granted, you were collapsing on his other side. Tears of joy in your eyes that Rhys wiped away.
Your family, safe.
Everyone seemed happy to return to Velaris. Home. Scars were left over everyone, fears and pains. Some wore them better than others.
You'd thrown yourself into life. And avoiding Azriel. Suddenly there were many friends you'd neglected that you needed to take dinner with, or so many spontaneous Rita nights with Nesta.
And none of it escaped his notice. The steady thump of the bond still thrived inside of you, his shadows followed everywhere you went, even loitering in your room.
If he was doing it in an attempt to annoy you, then you weren't gonna break first.
After a particularly harrowing Rita's night, the only thing you wanted to do was sleep in for the rest of the day, hide away from everyone and everything. Call it your coping mechanism.
Alas, there was no peace as your curtains were thrown open, light spilling in and burning through your eyelids.
'Knock it off!' the shadows had never bothered with waking you up before- it seemed they'd picked the worst time to start.
'We need to talk,' said a voice that certainly wasn't a shadow.
Rhysand.
You groan, rolling over. 'Can't you talk to me when i'm not hungover.'
'And when would that be, sister? you're getting as bad as Nesta.'
You throw your pillow off and at him, but he dodged it easily and with a smug smile. 'I hate it when you call me that.'
'What? When I compare you to Nesta? Clean up your act then.' He stood over your bed, his arms folded over his chest.
You glare at him. 'I meant sister.' You shuffled up, brushing your hair back.
Rhysand frowned and perched himself on the edge of your bed. There was something he wasn't saying, and you watched it weight heavy on his shoulders. 'You know the last time I was in your room you were throwing glasses at me and yelling at me to get out.'
'Well, don't give me ideas.'
His lips curled into a smile of amusement before he turned solemn again. 'Do you love me, y/n?'
You hadn't expected that. Your hangover could only get worse, your head swimming with possibilities as to why he was asking. And nervous, you were nervous. Maybe you'd never said you loved him out loud but surely your actions were enough of a tell. 'You're my high lord and my brother, of course.' you shrug it off, as if it was nothing.
The shadows trailed up the bed, as if sensing your anxiety.
Rhysand glanced over at you. 'Do you think I don't love you?'
You hesitate, chewing at the skin of your gum.
'Because I do. I do love you. You're my little sister, how can I not?' he muttered. 'And I didn't know you felt like that.'
'It was just sort of... obvious,' you said. 'I was never your sister, not really. I always knew that. You'd never see me like that so, I gave up thinking you would. But you're the only family I have.'
'No, I'm not,' he denied. 'Y/n, everyone in this house loves you. They're your family. And i'm sorry- i'm so sorry if my actions have ever made you think different.'
'Why now?' you ask, eyes screwed up looking at him. 'Why are you saying all this now, what's changed?'
He shook his head, strands of his hair- the same as yours- falling over his eyes. 'You almost died, died on that battlefield and I-I wasn't the first one there. Granted, it was your mate that reached you first but I, I wasn't there quick enough.'
You meet his gaze, his purple eyes sad in a way you'd only ever seen under the mountain. 'You died.'
'And as I was dying one of my deepest regrets was not calling you sister enough,' he shifted closer, taking your head in his hands as if you were a little kid. 'You are my sister. Full flesh and blood. Full love of mine. You are my family. After everything you've done for me. You were right, I needed you under there, when there was nothing good to keep me grounded, but you. My little sister.'
You were sure you were tearing up in front of him.
'You'll always be my sister.'
You laugh. 'Maybe I should get stabbed more often.'
'No,' he said seriously. 'I don't think Azriel would like that very much.'
The mention of him changed the tone in conversation, changed the very beating of your heart.
'What's going on with you two?'
'Oh, I see,' you tease, 'talk to me above sister and brotherly relations just to get in my love life. Not a good look on you high lord.'
He laughed. 'No, it's not that. I just care about the two of you, a lot. And you both deserve to be happy. And I think you'd be happiest with each other.'
You look down, twirling the rings on your fingers.
'Would it be so bad to try to love him?'
You shake your head, smiling as a tear rolls down your cheek. 'I don't even have to try. Feels like i've loved him forever.' his shadows climbed up your arm, leaving Rhysand to smile at the affection.
'You'll work it out,' said Rhys, leaning over and kissing the crown of your head.
Your door was thrown open, startling the two of you.
Azriel stood there. For his entrance, he didn't at all seem that confident when he stood in front of the two of you. His hands didn't know how to hold themselves in front of him.
Your brows rose. 'Were you listening at the door?'
'Azriel,' scolded Rhysand with a stupid grin.
'Get dressed,' he said simply to you. 'There's something you need to see.'
Without much room for argument, you kicked them both out and dressed.
You'd grudgingly let Azriel hold your hand as he led you through the woods. You'd winnowed in at an illyrian camp before he took you through it and into the woods close by.
It was the same camp you'd first met Azriel in. The oldest where you'd all become friends. You'd asked what you were doing there, but he was quiet as he led you through, helping you over roots or breaking twigs from the trees so they didn't hit you.
'Azriel, to any other girl, you leading her silently through a woods without saying anything would be a bit suspicious,' you tell him. His shadows trailed behind the two of you and his hand was secure in yours. You knew not to be scared, but you were still cautious.
'I wouldn't show any girl this,' he said.
After another half hour of walking, the two of you stumbled across a small hut. It was a tiny thing really, made out of twigs and sticks, hay and mud. It looked like something a child was capable of making.
Azriel paused in front of it. He let go of you hand and reached for the door. He was as tall as it and his wings had to tuck in tightly behind him.
Hesitantly, you followed in.
It was just as small as it looked and dirty, like it hadn't been touched in years. Cobwebs hung low (his shadows quickly tried to bat them all away for you) there was dirt and hay all over the floor. Glasses were dust filled and left around with a hundred other things. Some looked new, others old.
And yet, strangely familiar.
'I made this place,' said Azriel.
You looked back at him. He was hunched over a large box that was overflowing with things. 'You?'
'The first time my brothers picked on me, I came to these woods, working on this for days. Every time things got too much back then, i'd come here. I've been coming back for years.' he glanced at you, a sheepish look on his face. 'I've never showed anyone this before.'
You look around the place in new perspectives. The shadows settled around the place. You pictured a little Az, running here and hiding from his brothers. Did he feel alone? Did he feel un-loved? You were so enamoured by it you didn't realise he'd settled on the ground, pulling out things from his box.
'This is your glove, the one's you were wearing when we first met. You took them off to beat up some kid who was being mean to me. You didn't go back for them, you didn't even care.'
He said, pulling out a pair of red wool gloves. In spite of the hut, they were in perfect condition. Pristine. You remembered first meeting him, remembered the little soldier who'd been horrible. Those gloves wouldn't go anywhere near your hand now.
Azriel went in again. 'This is the empty glass jar of the cream you used to help my burns. Here's a book you read to me when I couldn't flip the pages myself. The notes you'd leave when you had to go back to camp. The flowers you picked for me and gave me for my birthday. Dried and stamped from every time you gave them to me.'
You stood, in shock as he kept taking things out.
'A terrible drawing I did of you when I was young. A locket of yours that broke and you never wore again. Stamps from our first theatre trip. Empty bottles from our first night together in Rita's- and Cassian's too. A letter you wrote to me when I was on a mission. A black ribbon from your hair, you used to always wear it with these things. Honestly, the amount I have in here,' and he pulled out several, of varying shades. Black, white, grey, red, dark green. All yours.
Azriel wasn't done. 'A page of annotations you did in one of Rhysand's books. A copy of your favourite poems. A coaster from the first time just you and I went to dinner. Here's some stones from when I first taught you to skim them. A quill that I used to use to write you letters. An old ring of yours is here too. Here's the first dagger you got me. It's too precious to me to be used to kill.'
Tears were falling down your cheeks as you watched him pull them all out and explain them in depth. There was more but the sight of it all was becoming blurred through your tears. The bond felt heavy and beautiful in you.
Azriel finally put the box down and fell to his knees in front of you. His hands came around the back of your thighs, holding you there as his eyes looked up into yours. 'Don't you ever think I don't love you, when I have loved you since we were eleven years old.'
You stutter on you breath. 'H-how?'
He rests his head on your stomach, looking utterly at your will and completely in love. 'How could I not?'
Slowly, as you could not move too fast, you settled down on your knees across from him. His hands moved up to your arms as yours went to his cheeks, brushing back his hair.
'It was always going to be you, wasn't it?' you mumbled. 'How could it be anyone else?'
Azriel kissed you then, finally. His lips were as soft as they'd looked, as you'd always imagined. His hands drifted to your waist, finger tips digging into to hold you close. His hands were strong, but his lips were gentle. He pulled away, only to groan in need before reaching for your lips again, harder, desperate.
His teeth bit down on your bottom lip, tongue sliding in to feel every corner of your mouth as his hands wondered around you, trying to grip onto any bit of you he could. Your arms wrapped around his neck, bringing him closer. Close enough to consume, to breath in.
You pulled back enough to catch your breath, arms still around his shoulders. 'Mother above, am I gonna make you the best meal of your life.'
But that could wait. For now, you'd settle for a dusty floor in the little house in the woods.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Taglist: @tothestarsandwhateverend @darlingbravebelle @lil-lupa @haileycannotcometothephantom @fairywriter-oracle @isa1b2h3 @tele86 @thebeautifulmysteriesoflife @unleashthelion @naturakaashi @aurora1115 @sirens-and-moonflowers @azriels-shadowsinger @willowpains @crazylokonugget @abysshaven @anuttellaa @wishfulwithwine @one-big-fangirl @harrystylesfan2686 @charlotteintumbleland @mellowarcadefun @starseedsamurai
#azriel x cassian x reader#azriel x you#azriel x reader#azriel#acotar#rhysand#cassian#nesta archeron#feyre archeron#azriel x oc#azriel x elain#azriel x female!reader#azriel x original character#swifties
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𝓕𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓥𝓪𝓵𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓮 ₊˚⊹♡
𝙄 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙡 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙮𝙤𝙪...
𝙄 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙡𝙮 𝙧𝙖𝙣 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙥.
𝙄 𝙙𝙞𝙙𝙣’𝙩 𝙨𝙩𝙪𝙢𝙗𝙡𝙚 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙖𝙧𝙢𝙨;
𝙄 𝙙𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙚.
𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙨𝙣’𝙩 𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙥𝙩 𝙖𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙗𝙮 𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚;
𝙄 𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙖𝙞𝙡 𝙞𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙤𝙘𝙚𝙖𝙣.
𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙙𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙨,
𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙚𝙨𝙩 𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨,
𝘼𝙣𝙙 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙞𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙡.
Happy Valentine’s Day from us to you 🫶🏼 Elain and Azriel’s love is warm and gentle—it’s like coming home. Their love is like the soft glow of the morning sun. It is a love that brings contentment, joy, and peace. @annluvazzel conveyed that feeling perfectly in this piece and we cannot be more appreciative of her work!
˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥
𐙚 Art by @annluvazzel
𐙚 Commissioned by @duskcowboy & I
𐙚 Characters belong to @sarahjmaas
Find it on IG here!
Please do not repost 🚫
˚₊· ͟͟͞➳❥
#elriel#elain archeron#azriel#pro elriel#acotar#elain#azriel x elain#azriel shadowsinger#pro elain archeron
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Im yours, but you're not mine
Azriel x Archeron!reader
Warnings: Angst, fluff
masterlist
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Sitting down at the table, Y/n watched all the happy couples in her family partner off.
Rhysand was running his fingers through Feyre's hair while little Nyx babbled happily in her lap, Nesta and Cassian held each others hands under the table, Amren was quite literally on top of Varian and Mor and Emerie were sat gossiping and drinking wine.
Y/n turned her gaze to her twin sister, Elain. Who had, not only one, but two males trying to get her attention. Her mate, Lucien whom she had recently been trying to get along with more was sat to her left smiling as she spoke.
On her right however, sat the shadow singer, Azriel. Someone Y/n had been practically infatuated with since she arrived in Velaris, yet, he payed her little mind, opting to speak to her sister instead.
Azriel sat listening intently to Elain, adding little comments here and there and paying no mind to anyone else whatsoever.
It struck Y/n suddenly, like a stab to her heart, she was alone.
The only one out of her sisters to not have a mate.
Alone.
The word hung in her mind like itch she couldn't reach, and she felt tears well up in her eyes.
Attempting to push them back down Y/n sucked in a breath and Nesta turned to her looking concerned. She raised a perfectly groomed eyebrow as if to say 'are you alright?'
Y/n meekly swallowed and stood up "I- I'm just going- i'm just going to go to the bathroom"
she quickly walked into the bathroom where she began to sob.
"Y/n? Y/n are you alright?" Elain's voice traveled past the door.
"Yes Elain im okay-"
"Please let me in, I know you aren't"
Y/n reluctantly opened the door revealing her sobbing form.
"Oh Y/n... what happened!" Elain cooed pulling her twin into a hug
"N-nothing I just- I- I was looking at all of you, happily coupled and- I just- I started to feel lonely..."
Elain's face morphs into an empathetic frown as she strokes my hair.
"it's so silly- but- I cant help being jealous of you. W-why d-does nobody want me?" Y/n said quietly, her voice cracking.
Elain abruptly groaned loudly "Honestly why is it always me sorting out relationship issues!"
Y/n's brows furrow, hurt by her sudden discontentment "w-what"
"no! no I didn't mean it like that I meant- wait here"
Elain gets up quickly and leaves.
Y/n sits on the floor of the bathroom wiping her eyes as Elain comes back.
"Here." Elain then shoved Azriel in front of Y/n
"Im so done with your guys' bullshit please just speak and leave me alone." she walked away muttering to herself.
"Azriel?" Y/n questions, confused.
He shuffled from side to side, nervous and completely out of character.
"Y/n... I need to tell you something, can we go- outside?"
Y/n nodded getting up off the floor and following him outside.
"Azriel... what's happening- I-"
"Y/n you're my mate." Azriel blurted out.
"w-what? but- but I thought you and- you and-" Y/n stumbled over her words completely overwhelmed.
"Me and Elain? absolutely not, she and Lucien are serious now- she was just helping me with- well- letting me talk at her about you really..."
Y/n let out a shaky breath "Are- are you pranking me?"
Azriel's brows furrowed "No! gods no y/n not at all!"
he moved to encircle her into a hug "I'm yours if you'll have me sweetheart."
"Ive- ive liked you ever since I first saw you Azriel- I just- I thought you wanted Elain."
"Oh love" he sighed kissing her hair. "I want you- all I want is you- day in day out, I talk Elain's ear off."
Y/n smiled tearily up at him.
"There's that pretty smile hmm?" he cooed looking down at the girl.
"can I- can I kiss you?" Y/n murmured.
"You don't even have to ask" Azriel whispered.
Suddenly, their lips attached in rhythmic perfection, holding each other close.
a chorus of whoops and cheers are heard from inside and the pair start laughing into the kiss.
"mate." Azriel murmured into Y/n's soft lips.
"mate." She replied.
Maybe she wasn't so alone after all.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
my requests are always open!!
#siriuslystyle1989#hanwrites!#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#acotar fanfic#azriel acotar#azriel x reader#acosf#azriel#azriel spymaster#azriel shadowsinger#azriel fluff#pro azriel#azriel acosf#azriel fanfic#azriel x elain#azriel smut#azriel x you#azriel angst#azriel fic
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BLUE

Paring: Azriel x Reader, Lucien x platonic!Reader
Summary: After Azriel and Elain‘s courtship is revealed, their mates, Lucien and Y/N, are left to deal with the consequences. While fighting against Koschei and for Prythian‘s freedom, Y/N has to navigate her emotions and learn how to live with the heartbreak of a one sided mating bond. But what happens when long kept secrets are revealed and everything turns out differently than they thought?
PART I
word count: 3k
A/N: this is part 1 of BLUE. I changed the beginning a bit to fit the storyline. Please be nice this is my first fic :)
Warnings: light angst, unrequited love, mention of childhood trauma/ mention of ãbuse (not described)
part 2

I stir my black tea as Rhysand files through the report I handed him just seconds ago.
The steam from the tea rises, curling in delicate tendrils, carrying with it a sense of fleeting warmth that I desperately cling to.
Rhysand’s office is both grand and simple.
Bookshelves line the walls, filled with volumes on history, strategy, and magic. A fireplace to the right. Above it, a large portrait of Velaris shows the city bathed in a soft, ethereal glow. Feyre gifted it to him last starfall.
Heavy velvet drapes in shades of midnight blue frame the windows, ready to be drawn shut for privacy.
In the distance I can make out the mountains with their snow-capped peaks and the Sidra winding through the valley below.
“I have to say, I’m impressed you were able to convince Devlon so fast.”
I look up at Rhys and chuckle, the sound hollow to my own ears. “It does help if you threaten to cut his balls off and stake them to the wall for everyone to see.”
Rhys lifts a brow and barks out a laugh. “I see.”
I rarely go on missions anymore, choosing to work as an advisor for Rhysand.
Missions used to be exciting, but nowadays I prefer the comfort my room provides. The sense of security it brings is a balm to my soul, now more than ever.
I take this as a sign to stand up and lift my bag from the floor. I sling it over my shoulder and make my way to the door.
“Don’t forget tonight’s family dinner,” Rhysand calls after me. I don’t look back, just give him a thumbs-up and close his office door behind me.
As I make my way downstairs and through the foyer, I spot Lucien strapping on his sword. Presumably getting ready for training, he has always been an early riser.
“How did the mission go?” Lucien doesn’t need to look up to see that it’s me approaching.
I let out a sigh and rub my temples. “Good.” I stop beside him and flop onto the recamier right next to the front door. “Well, as good as paying the camps a visit can get.”
Lucien cracks a smile at that, his amber eyes twinkle with amusement. He knows exactly how difficult it is to convince Devlon of something he isn’t particularly fond of.
“Are you coming to the family dinner tonight?” I ask, my voice betraying a hint of reluctance.
Lucien sheaths his blade and nods. “Feyre will have my head if I don’t show up. I already missed the last one.”
I cringe at the mention of the last family dinner. The memory alone sends a sharp pang through my chest.
———————
I walk into the dining room, ready to face yet another family dinner. I spot Mor right away, radiant in her blood-red gown. The sight of her is always one of familiarity and comfort.
“Hey, got another one of those?” I point to the wine glass in her hand. She arches a brow and hands me one filled to the brim.
“Are we so exhausting that you need liquid encouragement to get through the night?” she muses. I just roll my eyes, trying to hide my amusement.
Right as she opens her mouth to say something, the back of my head begins to tickle. He is here.
I turn around to see Azriel walk through the door, and he is not alone. Elain is beside him, their hands intertwined.
Even though I was expecting it to happen soon, the sight still hits me like a physical blow. It was always just a matter of time till Azriel and Elain decided to go against Rhys‘s order and make their love official.
I‘m glad, Lucien isn’t here to witness this. I can’t imagine how it would be for him.
Since only my side of the bond snapped into place, seeing how in love they are, is somehow… manageable. For Lucien it would be almost deadly.
I look back at Mor, her expression as shocked as mine. “I didn’t know,” she whispers, her face now bearing a look of worry and pity.
To say the dinner is awkward would be an understatement. Nobody really knows what to say after Elain and Azriel walked in holding hands.
I just shove the potatoes on my plate around, too nauseous to eat anything. The lump in my throat makes swallowing impossible.
Cassian clears his throat and points to Azriel and Elain. “So how long has this been going on?” Nesta jabs her elbow into his ribs, which earns her an “oww”, and throws me an apologetic look.
Besides Mor, only Lucien and Nesta know about the bond between me and Azriel. Their concern a constant reminder of the bond I try so hard to ignore.
“Well…” Azriel coughs, noticeably uncomfortable with being put on the spot. “It all happened very quickly. We spent a lot of our nights up and talking and realized we didn’t want to hold back anymore.”
He gazes down at her, smiling. I recognize that look. The realization twists the knife in my heart.
That’s how I look at him.
—————————
“Are you even listening?” Lucien waves a hand in front of my face to snap me out of my haze. His voice pulls me back to the present, but the ache remains.
I rub my eyes. “Uh… sorry. What exactly were you saying?”
He crosses his arms and looks down at me. “I was asking if you wanted to go training with me. But it seems what you really need is some sleep.”
I roll my eyes and stand up. “You know me so well, Lu.” I pat his shoulder and walk out the door. “See you at dinner tonight.”
Velaris is most beautiful at night, but nothing can beat the quiet and peace of the early mornings.
I walk down the high street, greeting some of my favorite vendors with a smile, until I reach the familiar townhouse.
After I officially became part of Rhysand’s inner circle, he offered me to stay at his townhouse.
It had many perks: no rent, right in the heart of Velaris, and an endless wine supply thanks to Rhysand’s "secret" wine cellar.
There is really only one downside.
“I didn’t think you would be back so soon.” Azriel sits at the dinner table eating breakfast. He has his fighting leathers on, probably on his way to the House of Wind for Valkyrie training.
Cassian and Azriel still train the Valkyries every morning. Sometimes I join, but only when Nesta drags me up there.
“Well, sorry to disappoint.” I laugh awkwardly. “I’m going to head upstairs to rest. Say hello to Nesta for me.” The words taste bitter, a poor attempt to mask the hurt.
I turn around before he has the chance to say something else, the lump in my throat threatening to choke me.
Yes, that is the downside. The constant reminder of what I had lost and could never have.
Him.
——————
The dining room buzzes with conversation as everyone settles in for dinner.
Azriel and Elain sit together, a vision of contentment that sends a pang through my heart.
Across the table, Lucien’s jaw is tight, his gaze fixed on his plate.
“Thank you all for coming,” Rhysand begins, standing at the head of the table. “I have an important announcement to make.”
He glances at Lucien and me, a hint of apology in his eyes. “We’ve decided to support Eris in overthrowing Beron.
Lucien and you,” he points at me, “will lead the mission to the Autumn Court.”
A murmur runs through the room. Lucien looks up, his eyes meet mine.
There is a mixture of determination and vulnerability in his gaze that makes my heart ache.
The Autumn Court doesn’t hold great memories for either of us.
But before I can fully process Rhysand’s words, Azriel stands abruptly, his expression dark and tense.
“Why them?” Azriel’s voice is sharp, a stark contrast to his usual calm demeanor. “Why not send someone else?”
Rhysand frowns slightly, clearly not expecting this reaction.
“Both of them have a unique advantage given their history with Eris and the Autumn Court. It’s a strategic decision.”
Azriel’s eyes flicker to me, a storm of emotions swirling within them. “I don’t like it. It’s too dangerous.”
I feel a surge of frustration. Azriel’s protectiveness, though touching, is misplaced and completely out of character.
“What’s your problem, Azriel?” I snap, unable to hold back.
“I’m more than capable of leading this mission. Or do you think I’m not good enough to do my job?”
His eyes narrow, the tension between us thickening. “That’s not what I meant,” he retorts, his voice lower but no less intense.
“I just don’t think it’s wise to send specifically you two into such a volatile situation. You can’t just throw yourself into danger like that.”
My heart pounds in my chest. “That’s rich coming from you. You’re always in danger, always risking everything. How is that different from this mission?”
“It’s different because—” Azriel stops himself, glancing at Elain, who is watching us with wide eyes. He seems to struggle for a moment before finishing, “It doesn’t matter, just let someone else do the mission. You’re an important asset to this court.”
Before I could respond with something I’d surely regret, Elain’s voice cuts through the tension.
“Azriel, stop.” Her voice is calm but firm, a hint of desperation in her eyes. “This isn’t helping.”
Azriel turned to Elain, his expression softens slightly, but the tension remains. He takes a deep breath, trying to regain his composure. “I’m sorry. I just… I worry.”
Lucien’s gaze hardens, “We’ve faced worse,” he says, a challenge in his tone. “We are capable enough to lead this mission, we don’t need your approval, Shadowsinger.”
Azriel’s jaw clenches, a muscle ticking in his cheek. “It’s not about capability. It’s about safety. I don’t want to see anyone get hurt.”
“Anyone?” I echo, my voice rises. “Or just Elain’s mate?”
The words hang in the air, charged with emotion. Azriel flinches slightly.
“This has nothing to do with Lucien being Elain‘s mate,” he says, though the slight tremor in his voice betrays him.
“But it does, doesn’t it?” My words laced with venom. “If Lucien were to get hurt, it would cause Elain distress, that’s how a mating bond works. And we can’t have that, can we?”
Elain looks down, her face unreadable, while Lucien’s gaze flickers between Azriel and me.
“We all know the risks,” Lucien says more calmly this time, “And we’re prepared to face them.”
Rhysand interjects, his voice low but authoritative. “Enough. We’re all on the same side here. This is a mission we need to undertake for the greater good. Personal feelings need to be set aside.”
I take a deep breath and try to steady the storm of emotions within me. Rhysand is right, the last thing we need is Azriel and me fighting.
Rhysand sits down, his tone final. “This mission is vital. We need to trust each other and stay focused. We’ll discuss this further tomorrow. For now, let’s try to enjoy the evening.”
The atmosphere is strained as we resume our meal. I can feel Azriel’s gaze on me.
Lucien reaches over, giving my hand a reassuring squeeze. It was a small gesture, but it meant everything in that moment.
I don’t say a word throughout the whole dinner. Choosing to stay quiet instead of lashing out.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that this mission would change everything.
---
The garden of the River House is a haven of tranquility. Blooming flowers and lush greenery everywhere Elain truly is a talented gardener.
I find Lucien leaning against a stone pillar, his gaze lost in the Sidra's gentle flow.
I approach him quietly, the cool evening air brushing against my skin. “Mind if I join you?” I ask softly.
Lucien looks up, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips. “Of course not. I was just enjoying the peace before the storm.”
I halt beside him, the tension from the dinner still coils tightly in my chest. “Quite the announcement, wasn’t it?”
He nods, his expression thoughtful. “I knew something like this was coming, but hearing it confirmed… it’s different.
Eris must be desperate if he reached out to Rhysand.”
I sigh, running a hand through my hair. “Yes, it’s a lot. I wish Rhys would have told us separately. This topic is already very emotional I really didn’t need Azriel’s… concern too.”
Lucien’s eyes darken at the mention of Azriel. “He’s protective, that’s clear. But he doesn’t have the right to undermine your abilities.”
“It’s not just that,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper. “His words, his actions… they confuse me. One moment he’s distant, the next he’s overly concerned. I don’t understand him.”
Lucien’s gaze softens, a flicker of understanding in his eyes. “He cares about you. He might not be aware of it but you’re his mate, bond snapping into place or not, it’s his priority to keep you safe. That can’t be changed, even if he’s in love with someone else.”
I look away, the garden blurring before my eyes. “It hurts, Lucien. Seeing him with Elain, pretending to be something they’re not. I don’t know how to deal with it.”
Lucien reaches out, his hand covering mine. “You’re not alone in this. We’ve all got our battles to fight, and sometimes the hardest ones are with our own hearts.”
A moment of silence stretches between us, the night air filled with the scent of blooming flowers.
“And what about you?” I ask, turning to look at him. “How are you handling all of this? Eris, the Autumn Court… it can’t be easy for you.”
Lucien’s expression grows somber. “It’s not. But I’ve come to terms with my past and everything my father did to me. I knew this was going to happen. Eris has the chance to change things, to make the Autumn Court a better place. I can’t turn my back on that.”
He smiles at that. “And maybe, when all of this is over, we’ll find some semblance of peace.”
As we stand there, the garden enveloping us in its quiet embrace, I feel a sense of calm settle over me. Whatever challenges lay ahead, I know we have each other’s backs.
—————————
The war room in the House of Wind is filled with dread as we gather around the large oak table.
Rhysand stands at the head, his usual easy demeanor replaced by a grave seriousness.
To his right, Amren sits with her usual enigmatic expression, while Cassian leans against the wall, arms crossed and a stern look on his face.
Azriel is on my left, his gaze unreadable, and Lucien sits across from me, his eyes focused and determined.
Rhysand unfurls a detailed map of the Autumn Court, its forests and strongholds marked with meticulous detail.
“Eris has provided us with information about Beron’s movements and the layout of his court. Our objective is to infiltrate the main stronghold, gather intelligence, and support Eris in his efforts to dethrone Beron.”
Lucien nods, his jaw set. Rhys continues. “We’ll enter through the southern border. Eris has arranged for a distraction that will draw most of Beron’s guards away from the main stronghold. This will give us the opportunity to slip in and meet with Eris.”
Amren leans forward, her sharp eyes assessing the map. “And what about Koschei? He’s been a wild card in all of this. His alliance with Beron could complicate things.”
Rhysand nods in agreement. “Koschei is a concern. According to Eris, Koschei has been providing Beron with dark magic. We need to be prepared for any magical traps or barriers.”
Azriel’s voice cuts through the discussion. “I’ll handle the reconnaissance. I’ll fly ahead and ensure the path is clear before they move in.”
I glance at him, he hasn’t looked at me or said a single thing to me since yesterday. If I didn’t know better I would say he was sulking.
Rhysand continues, “Once inside, our main goal is to secure the throne room and neutralize Beron’s guards. Eris will confront Beron directly. You,” he gestures to Lucien and me, “need to be ready to support him.”
Lucien nods again, his eyes meeting mine across the table. “We’ll be ready.”
Rhysand’s gaze softens slightly as he looked at us. “This mission is dangerous, but it’s necessary. Any questions?”
I take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the responsibility settle on my shoulders. “What if things go wrong? Do we have an extraction plan?”
Amren smirks. “We have a plan. Azriel and I will be your backup. If things go south, we’ll get you out, girl.”
Azriel nods, his eyes meeting mine. “You won’t be alone out there. We’ll be watching.”
There is a moment of silence as everyone absorbs the gravity of this mission.
Finally, Rhysand speaks again, his voice resolute. “We leave at dawn. Get some rest and prepare yourselves.”
As we all stand to leave, Azriel catches my arm. “Can I talk to you for a moment?” he asks, his voice low.
I nod, following him to a quieter corner of the room. “What is it, Azriel?”
He hesitates, searching for the right words. “I know you’re capable. But this mission… it’s dangerous, and I can’t shake the feeling that something might go wrong. Just promise me you’ll be careful.”
His concern should touch me, but I can’t help and feel angry. “I know the risks, Azriel. And I’ll be careful. But you need to trust me to do my part.”
He sighs, running a scarred hand through his hair. “It’s not that I don’t trust you or your abilities. I just… I can’t lose you.”
Before I can respond, Lucien approaches.“Ready?” Lucien asks, his eyes flicker between Azriel and me. I nod, giving Azriel one last look.
“Ready.”

#azriel#azriel acotar#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x reader#azriel x you#lucien acotar#lucien x reader#lucien x you#lucien vanserra#elain x lucien#azriel x elain#eris acotar#eris vanserra#acotar fanfiction#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#fanfic#angst#imjustreadinglmao#fanfiction#rhysand#feyre archeron#feyre acotar#cassian#nesta archeron#nesta acotar#elain archeron#elain acotar#amren#morrigan
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Hello foreshadowing of Elriel getting married!
Give me an Elriel wedding or give me death!
#elriel#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#azriel#elain archeron#azriel x elain#elain x azriel#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar#acomaf#a court of mist and fury
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Azriel: Elain, you have nice hands
Elain: *confused* thanks?
Azriel: *smirks* I bet they'd look even better wrapped around my-
Rhysand: WRAPPED AROUND THE BOOK OF VELARIS! PRAISE THE MOTHER AND ALL HER BLESSINGS! HALLELUJAH!
#pro elriel#elriel#azriel x elain#pro elain#acotar#pro azriel#incorrect quotes#elriel supremacy#elain x azriel#pro rhysand
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Rainy Season
Azriel x Reader
An angsty little one shot. Azriel’s mate is tired of being at the bottom of his list of priorities.
Update: Due to popular demand, this is being made into a series!
Part 2

The air’s getting heavy and we both know why
There was a time when an evening like this brought solace to my weary soul.
Azriel’s hand wrapped around my waist, caressing my stomach, pressing soft kisses to the juncture of my neck and shoulder. His hair tickling against my sensitive skin as we hid under blankets absorbing the incessant melody of drip, drop, drip, drop and the echoing pitter patter of rain drops hitting the roof. His warmth seeping right through to the coldest depths of my soul.
I’d turn around, pressing my bare breasts against his muscled chest. Our breath hitching as his sunburst eyes of brown, amber, and gold bore into mine, his soft lips whispering promises of forever.
Say that this storm is just passing through
But Azriel wasn’t here. He hadn’t been for 6 days, 23 hours, and 50 minutes now. It would have been laughable, comparing the past to now, if it weren’t so damned sad. In the beginning there’d been long, doting love notes with risqué quips regarding his intentions upon coming home, little gifts that he couldn’t resist bringing back from his travels, and the stolen hours where he’d sneak in a visit during the intermittent downtime on his missions. As a realist, I knew that it was not sustainable long-term but relished in it as the gift it was. Newly formed, passionate love that exceeded anything I had ever imagined upon finding my cauldron-blessed mate.
As the years went on I understood when the love notes became briefs and the thoughtful gifts became pecks on the cheek as he hurried through the door to exchange his leathers for clean ones, wipe down his weapons, and rest before his next mission. But time went on, as is inevitable, and distant were the memories of stolen moments away from missions, the desperate caress of his hands roaming my body as if he couldn’t quite believe I was fully corporeal before him - needing to touch me to reassure him that this was real. Now the touches were detached, perfunctory, another task on his never-ending to-do list.
Drop after drop we’re destroying this house and eachother.
The boiling point had been simmering for a while, left on the fire with reassurances of “Things are just busy right now”, “It’ll slow down soon”, “I would stay if I could, love. You know I would. I have no choice.”
But we both knew all too well that there was always a choice. There were times when Rhys let it slip that Azriel had volunteered for missions that his other spies were perfectly suited for, times when all I wanted in the world was to be curled up and listening to the rain with my mate.
Missions became tasks with the Valkyries, “chaperoning” Cassian and Nesta, and emotionally supporting the lovely doe-eyed fawn - Elain - who was the delicate cherry blossom of spring opposite of my wild summertime storm.
It wasn’t her fault. The trauma inflicted upon her, the loss of autonomy that came with being thrown into the cauldron and having her mortality stripped away without her say. The powers she never asked for overwhelming her senses. Hell, maybe it wasn’t Azriel’s fault for responding to the traumas of his past and the need to overcompensate for every ounce of blood he’s drawn by saving anything and everything that needed rescuing.
The problem lay with the fact that where Elain is a “seer”, my ability to “sense” when things are amiss was strong and Azriel’s intentions with her were becoming blurred. Feelings of lust had become more frequent down the bond along with flutters of joy and adoration. When it began I thought maybe things would look up in our relationship - he was missing me, fisting his cock to fantasies of taking me over and over when he returned home - but he only became more distant. He’d return more often than not smelling of jasmine and honey. The strength of the scent coating him correlating with the increase in enamored feelings slipping through the bond.
Six days ago when I’d asked him to skip out on training with Cassian and Nesta and whatever it was he and Elain would do - that was when the thunder clapped and the sky opened. “I can’t just stay home and cater to you all the time. I have duties to this court. Why can’t you find a hobby to occupy your time? Nesta reads and trains with the Valkyries, Feyre paints, Elain gardens and she evens bakes! Why can’t you be more like-“
He caught himself too late, immediately reaching out to place a gentle hand on my shoulder and apologize but it was too late for that.
Please, make it stop
It wasn’t that I wasn’t a forgiving or understanding person. i appreciated his dedication to his court and family and those in need but…
“Why can’t I be more like what? You can stop mid-sentence but you already said it all.” I looked down, shaking my head as silver lined my eyes. Gods, I hate that I’m an angry crier. “You want to know why I can’t be more like Elain in your eyes, Azriel? Because I exist in your fucking blind spot! I have been helping Feyre AT the studio, volunteering at a food pantry in Velaris, and teaching self-defense classes to women and children at the park but you wouldn’t know because you never ask me what I’ve been up to while you’re gone.”
He started to speak but I wasn’t finished. “The reason I cannot be more like Elain, or Feyre, or Nesta is because I’m none of them. I am ME. And you know what? I like me. I don’t want to be anybody else.” Trying and failing miserably to hold my head high I pathetically fell to my knees, shuddering as tears of rage flowed freely.
Warmth enveloped me as Azriel knelt down to soothe my quaking form. I let him if only because I didn’t have the composure to tell him otherwise as he began pressing kisses to my forehead. “I’m so sorry. I have been a terrible mate. I love all that you are- I- I’ll stop with Elain. She’s doing much better and Nuala and Cerridwen can keep an eye on her, so can Rhys and Cassian, and her sisters. It will be okay.”
That consolation attempt only drove the blade of bitterness deeper into my heart. Elain had so many in her corner and who did I have anymore? My chronically absent mate? The family I left behind to move to Velaris with Azriel? There was nobody close by.
“I think you should leave.” I sobbed out.
Azriel ignored the shaky command, continuing to hold me. Fuck - is this what it took for him to notice me? Breaking my heart so he could stitch it back up again?
“Azriel.” I stated firmly.
He met my eyes.
“You should leave.”
His look grew puzzled. “I thought you wanted me to stay - to spend time together? Please, Y/N. Let me make this better.”
“I need space. Give me one week.”
“But-“
“One. Week.”
Azriel’s shoulders slumped, head hanging low for several minutes before realizing that my decision was firm.
“I love you.” He said before heading out the door.
——————
Like clockwork as 7 days, 0 hours, and 1 minute were up, the front door to our home opened and Azriel’s footsteps padded in behind me, my gaze remaining fixated on the rain falling outside the window. A lump formed in my throat as I avoided turning to meet his gaze.
So dance one more dance and tell one more lie.
Azriel stepped around me, wordlessly extending a hand, patiently waiting as I avoided his gaze a moment longer before taking it. His shadows began humming faintly, increasing their melody and reaching a crescendo as Azriel began dancing with me through the room.
Say that you love me even if it’s not true
I let myself melt into the warmth of his chest. The thick air remained heavy upon my soul but I could have this. I could let myself enjoy this moment.
We wordlessly danced through the room in the soft glow of the fae lights.
We made our way through the hall into our shared bed that had become so neglected.
“I love you, Y/N.” he murmured as he laid me down, stripped bare underneath him.
“I love you too, Azriel.”
——————
Wish I could just say it and words were enough to keep you from being the one giving up.
The middle of the night left me restless as he lay soundly asleep beside me. My senses tugged me toward his bag that he’d discarded at the entryway. I brought out his dirty clothes from the week only to be greeted with the fresh scent of jasmine and honey.
Like the sky letting go for no reason
I packed my essentials and voyaged out into the pouring rain. Its patter on my skin washing away the salty tears streaming down my face. Following my senses to where the love was true back to my Summer Court home, my family. As free as a summer storm.
It's just the rainy season.
—————————————
A/n - I know there are plenty of Azriel x Reader and Elain fics out there. It was rainy and dreary here yesterday and this song was in my head for the first time in like 10 years so…. I wrote this.
#sarah j maas#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#azriel#a court of silver flames#a court of frost and starlight#a court of mist and fury#a court of wings and ruin#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x reader#azriel x elain#elain archeron#rainy season#inspired by Hunter Hayes#inspired by a song#azriel angst#angst#azriel one shot#acotar oneshot
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"How long was I gone? It felt like hours…" she asked softly.
"Eight minutes and forty-two seconds," Nuala said crisply, her precision as sharp as ever.
Azriel sighed, helping Elain to her feet. "Let’s get you to bed. You need to rest."
"No, no, I’m fine. I was in the middle of pruning—" Elain started to protest, but Azriel cut her off gently.
"You can prune the roses tomorrow," he said, his tone leaving no room for argument. "Right now, you need sleep. And food." He turned to the twins. "Nuala, grab the food. Cerridwen, put away her gardening tools and bring up a pitcher of water."
Elain huffed softly but didn’t argue further, leaning on Azriel’s arm as he guided her out of the garden. She insisted she was fine, but her steps were uneven, her exhaustion obvious. Azriel was just grateful he didn’t have any pressing tasks that day—and that Rhys and Feyre wouldn’t be back for a few hours. As they reached the staircase, Elain hesitated briefly, her grip tightening on his arm. "Fine," she muttered reluctantly, "but only a quick nap. I have plenty to do today."
Azriel didn’t bother responding, knowing she would pass out the moment her head hit the pillow. He held her steady as they ascended the stairs, Nuala following close behind. When they reached her door, Azriel paused, unsure if he should go inside. Her room—it felt too intimate, too personal. He’d never brought anyone into his own room at the House of Wind, and he wondered if she would feel the same way about her space.
But Elain simply pushed the door open and pulled him in without hesitation. Azriel’s breath caught.
The room was her. Every inch of it a reflection of the warmth and light she carried within her.
Large windows overlooked the garden, sunlight filtering in and casting soft glows across the floral bedding on her wide, inviting bed. The walls were lined with shelves brimming with books and trailing ivy, as though she’d brought the garden indoors. A wooden desk held a neatly arranged chessboard and a stack of papers, and fresh flowers adorned every available surface. The faint scent of jasmine and honey lingered in the air, mingling with the freshness of the blooms.
His gaze caught on the poetry book he had given her, sitting prominently on her nightstand. The sight of it, clearly cherished, sent a strange, warm ache through his chest. Before he could dwell on it too long, Nuala took Elain’s arm. "Let’s get you out of this dress and into something more comfortable."
"No, no, I’m fine. I’ll just lie down," Elain mumbled, already crawling onto the bed, her apron still tied around her waist.
Azriel stepped forward, carefully untangling the ties of her apron. "Let me get this for you," he murmured, leaning over her.
"Oh, yes, thank you," she said softly, her voice heavy with sleep.
As he leaned closer, untying the knots at her waist, her breath hitched. He froze for half a second, the proximity suddenly electric, his heart pounding in his chest. He swore her gaze flicked up to his. But then Nuala coughed, and the moment shattered. Azriel stepped back, holding the soil-stained apron in his hands. "I’ll let you rest," he said, his voice calm despite the storm brewing inside him. He nodded to Nuala as he turned to leave. "I’ll be downstairs if you need anything. Rhys and I have a meeting later, but I’ll stay here until then."
"Thank you, Azriel," Elain said softly, already nestled under the covers. Her long hair spilled across the pillows, and her eyes fluttered closed.
Azriel lingered for a moment longer than he should have, his shadows still swirling around her protectively. And then, with one last glance, he left, following Nuala out the door.
When they reached the kitchen, Cerridwen was waiting for them, her expression tight with concern.
"So..." Cerridwen began, her voice steady but laced with unease.
"I’ll see if Clotho has found any new books, especially around Earthvein," Azriel interrupted, his tone sharp, already forming a plan. "Maybe it can help us figure out what happened."
Cerridwen nodded but extended her hand, the faint scars along her wrist and thumb catching the light. The sight made Azriel’s jaw tighten.
"It was terrifying, Az. One minute she was talking to Nuala, the next, she was out—her eyes were white. And the thorns... as half-wraiths, we’re not supposed to scar," Cerridwen said, her voice faltering as she traced the pale lines on her skin. "It wasn’t just a thorn—there was magic inside."
"She’s much more powerful than anyone gives her credit for," Nuala added quietly, her agreement clear in the firm nod of her head.
Azriel sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I know. But until she’s ready to talk to Rhys and Feyre about it, all we can do is be there for her." His voice dropped, edged with frustration—not at them, but at himself, for not having answers. For not being able to help Elain as she stumbled through a world she wasn’t ready for. "Let me know if it ever happens again, even if I’m away. Write down when it happens, how long it lasts, anything you can. I want to see if there’s a pattern."
Because there had to be a pattern. There always was. Even with magic, there were connections—threads he could trace, piece together, understand.
Nuala hesitated, then glanced at Cerridwen. "You know, the reason her magic didn’t hurt you is probably because—"
Azriel held up a hand, cutting her off. "That’s not a conversation I’m ready to have. And neither is she." His voice was firm, leaving no room for argument.
But he knew. He knew exactly what Nuala and Cerridwen thought—and he hated how much it aligned with his own suspicions. Ever since he’d first laid eyes on Elain, his shadows had been drawn to her, her light. Her warmth. It was a thought he buried deep, an answer he wasn’t ready to face. Not yet.
Cerridwen rolled her eyes, crossing her arms. "Fine. But you know you’re going to have to talk to her about it eventually. And The High Lord and High Lady. And definitely Nesta." She smirked knowingly. "Because we both know she’ll have your head on a platter if you don’t tell her everything. I’m surprised she hasn’t killed Lucien for just existing yet."
Azriel huffed, his wings twitching slightly at the mention of Lucien. "He’s quite lucky he decided to run off with his ‘Band of Exiles,’ as I hear he’s calling it." The words dripped with sarcasm, his disdain clear.
Ridiculous name, he thought. Yes, Lucien was useful—his work with Jurian and Vassa provided crucial information—but Azriel couldn’t stomach the thought of him being Elain’s mate. Because if Elain were his... he would never have left her side.
Azriel shook the thought away, focusing on the present. "Check in on her in a few hours, okay? If Rhys and Feyre come home early and she’s still asleep, we’ll just say she has a headache. Make sure she eats when she wakes up. I’ll be in the front room working." He turned on his heel, shadows pooling at his feet as his mind raced. This wasn’t over—not by a long shot. Whatever was happening to Elain, whatever her magic was trying to tell them, he would figure it out. He had to.
Read The Rest on AO3
#elain x azriel#elriel#azriel#actoar fanfic#elriel for life#elrielendgame#acotar#elainarcheron#pro elain#elain the seer#azriel is obsessed#proelriel#azriel x elain#azriel acotar#maasverse#acotar fanfiction#acotar fandom
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Forbidden Love
instagram
Wrong — it was so wrong.
He didn’t care.
He needed to know what the skin of her neck tasted like.
Forbidden love never tasted so sweet. Especially with a mate sleeping upstairs.

Characters: Elain and Azriel
Series: ACOTAR by Sarah J Maas
Art: @celestarly
Co-commissioners: @lovelyfawnxx, @theseersgarden, @emilyondemand and @ botanical_brinn
#elriel#elain archeron#pro elriel#elriel endgame#pro elain#pro elain archeron#elain x azriel#elain x az#elainarcheron#elriel art#elriel fanart#Elriel bonus chapter#azriel and elain#azriel x elain#sexy elriel#Instagram
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they’re beautiful. 🥹🌸
this piece is a depiction of what might have happened when Azriel asked Elain, “would you like me to show you the garden?” i have forever adored tpiola_’s Elriel piece commissioned by emilysbookishtales, and so for my first official Elriel commission i commissioned tpiola_ as well. every part of this artwork is flawless, and tpiola_ absolutely nailed their expressions: Az looking down at Elain like she hung the moon and Elain gazing happily at her garden, both of them just enjoying spending a quiet moment together.
art by tpiola_ on Instagram
commissioned by bookish.biologist on Instagram (me!)
likes, comments, and shares appreciated!
please do not repost without permission from me!
thank you 🫶
#elriel#elriel true mates#elriel art#elriel month#elriel supremacy#elriel endgame#pro elriel#elain x azriel#azriel x elain#elain#elainarcheron#elain archeron fanart#theseersterhood#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#acotar#sarah j maas
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