#hard-headed asshole.
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Drop a Huky Overlords brebnant out of my pocket.
Out of nowhere I became interested in Husk Overlord
I think it's time to get him prenints
#the voices THE VOICES#mpreg#PREGNANT#fukin prePANT#Imagine that Husk and Angel are not even in a relationship#and that Angel is free#and Huky is also a stubborn#hard-headed asshole.#VERY BAD BOY#because otherwise he wouldn't be a fucking Overlord#/j#He is very silly and cute#my art
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🍂
#i redrew a wip i made months ago and it looked way better than the og so i finished it 😭#they are young adults here (like 18-20 range) this is just before they go to college 👍#i wanted to include more things with this but ill just post them separately later 😭 im lazy sorry#i wanna explain their friendship but words hard. basically clippy is a bit of a punching bag but he sticks with bonzi regardless#bonzi is an asshole and has almost gotten the both of them in trouble multiple times. Not a great influence#to bonzi clippy is like his own chatgpt or some shit. does his homework for him. his own personal nerd#clippy didnt realize he was being used for a long time because he was gullible 😔 HES OK NOW THO#virtual assistants#clippy#bonzi buddy#gijinka#object head#webcore#digital art#doodle#i said i would draw a happy clippy but um. 😭 ILL DRAW SOMETHING CUTE LATER i mean hes kinda cutes here but with extra context its ☹️#im still figuring out how to draw this stupid gorila
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There were two great posts about Izzy yesterday, and I would like to expand on and add my 2 ct to the things said in them a little. One, by @celluloidbroomcloset (with additions by several others), about how Izzy immediately falls back into old patterns of manipulative behaviour after his supposed redemption in 02x07, only this time with Stede as the focus of said behaviours instead of Ed. The other, by @batsarebetterthanpeople, about how Izzy's behaviour in 02x06 and onward is more akin to the development a homophobe coming around to a queer loved one, than an arc of queer self-discovery.
Izzy's story isn't about himself. I think this is the first, fundamental mistake people make when engaging with it. He's not a protagonist; he doesn't exist in the story for his own sake. So when ofmd asks "How to reform a toxic person? What does it look like and is it even possible?", the starting point isn't one of empathy with Izzy.
It's one of empathy with Ed. ofmd is asking these questions not because it wants to understand Izzy better. What it wants to explore is the possibility of Ed having the relationship with Izzy Ed wants. Whether Izzy can be brought around to understanding Ed's wants and needs, whether he can understand the hurt he caused him.
This is a fundamentally different approach to how these stories are usually told. Usually, we start out with the unspoken assumption that the toxic person is well-intentioned, good at heart, and whatever pain they caused our protagonist is more akin to a misunderstanding than deliberate harm. Yes, they may have have caused hurt, but if you just see things from their perspective, you'll understand that they only had your best interest in mind, and that will enable you to forgive them.
Obviously this can't not veer off into victim blaming. "The abuser had a good reason for what they did, and therefore, it's your own fault. Or at the very least not theirs."
ofmd fundamentally rejects this. It is very careful to never let the bullies and abusers have a valid point. Abusers are abusive because they get something out of it. To truly reform an abuser, they would have to be willing to build a life for themselves that is a lot less comfortable. Where they have to consider other's feelings, communicate and compromise, meet other people on equal footing, instead of putting themselves in a position of authority. It means letting go of patterns of behaviour that they have so far been quite successful with*.
And Izzy - tries. He is interesting because part of him clearly wants to leave the toxicity behind. He gets to see what positive relationships, human connection, being part of a community look like; he's offered an outstretched hand, and, after biting it a few times, tentatively starts to take it.
But he can't quite get there. The temptation to fall back into what he knows is too strong. celluloidbroomcloset's post linked above talks mainly about 02x07, so I'm not gonna repeat all that, but I'm going to add two little scenes from 02x06 that further cement this. In the beginning of the episode, Izzy finds Ed as he's standing on deck, watching the sea, and the conversation that plays out is a clear mirror to, almost repeat of the Frankfurter clouds scene from 01x04. Ed tries to share an observation with Izzy in an attempt to reach out to him ("Something's wrong. Feels like a storm's coming but I can't see it."), which Izzy, of course, immediately dismisses ("Or maybe you're just a mopey twat and there is no fucking storm").
The second scene is, when Izzy is the only one discouraging Ed from following Stede to his cabin after he kills Ned Lowe. Discouraging support, discouraging connection and emotional honesty; Izzy will continue to try to isolate Stede.
Now, I do not think this, or the things happening in 02x07, are put in there deliberately to show that Izzy has ulterior motives. Rather, they are an illustration of how deep these maladaptive patterns of behaviour go. Izzy isn't able to fully admit to himself the extend of the harm he caused and this is what prevents him from truly changing his behaviour - even when he has just experienced the benefits of a loving, supportive community!
All of this is the explanation to the answer the show gives to our starting question: Is it possible for Ed to have the relationship with Izzy that Ed wants? And the answer is: No. Just because growth is possible, doesn't mean it is enough. Doesn't mean anyone's entitled to forgiveness. Sometimes, the only compassionate thing to do, is to take yourself permanently out of the other person's life.
But Izzy did learn, and he did grow. It's just that the purpose of said growth wasn't to heal him; it was to enable him to understand the hurt he caused to Ed. That doesn't have to mean people like Izzy can never be reformed, it just means that this isn't a story about the reformation of a toxic person. It's the story of leaving this toxicity behind.
And this is why Izzy's heartfelt apology followed by his immediate death is a positive ending. It represents the conviction that no relationship is so broken it can't be mended, but also the assurance that no relationship is so important it can't be ended.
Ed gets to hear the things he needs to hear most - I am sorry, I was wrong, you didn't deserve this - and then Izzy disappears from his life, and with him, all the toxicity he represents.
They can part on good terms, but part they must. So Ed can go into the rest of his life, unburdened.
*read Lundy Bancroft's "Why does he do that", seriously. The whole thing is on archive.org.
#overall izzy is treated with so much more grace and kindness than the other toxic assholes on this show#because sometimes youre fond of them. right. you DO want to make it work its just not always possible#honestly i think some people just have a very hard time wrapping their head around the fact that izzy is just a narrative device#anyway!#our flag means death#izzy hands#edward teach#thoughts
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wait, that elias?
#huge shoutout to @sepezzz elias design this is very much inspired by it. go look at it#im so serious if i never draw another person manspreading in a fucking office chair it’ll be TOO SOON#anyways.#the juxtaposition truly is crazy hahaaha right people change in the weirdest of ways#i like thinking about how they both present themselves. elias understands he works at Important Academic Research Facility so he still#sooort of tries to look somewhat official. but well he also gets away with what he can#he has that vibe of Yeah i work here and im kind of important but i’m chill. i know how to chill#meanwhile that other freak is just like i am going to make this body look presentable or so help me god.#he’s the Head of the Institute he can no longer have whimsy okay. and listen it’s not because i think jonah is that boring and would#dislike piercings and funny socks or whatever. i think he’d like those. but see he needs to make this believable that elias truly has#changed okay. and also like i said he is the Head of the Institute he needs to look Super Normal And Unremarkable#anyways i think it’s funny how elias’ whole thing is that he tries to distance himself from his family image and tries really hard to Not#end up like a rich asshole. and then. well.#(looks around) So i think about this man a normal amount.#i could write like 20 thinkpieces on both of them but instead they’re gonna make me do college essays about like language and shit.#myart#the magnus archives#tma#elias bouchard#oh my god it is actually un fucking believable how much i think about him every day#if this becomes a daily elias blog yall will just have to deal
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So I played through some more dbh last night and woke up thinking, God, there is a good reason Markus and Kara, and their respective companions never got as popular as Connor and Hank. Literally The Bridge is surrounded by the most *do everything for absolutely no reason* chapters, and there's no comparison.
First the Kara chapter wastes your time, she barely gets any small talk in with Luther, then the car breaks down, then you're just doing tiny tasks, doing a shitty sum up of her story so far when Alice asks you to make one up- they could have done something interesting with that story but they chose not to, literally anything specific anything that would function as a parallel to their journey would have actually had some value. Then you barely start a conversation with Luther, where are you maybe get a hint of his personality before we're back to just talking about the plot and Alice, but then it's over again and you meet the Jerries and you learn almost nothing about them.
It is a chapter where you do nothing interesting, and you learn almost nothing about the main characters, for a downtime chapter, I expect character development and get barely a sneeze of it. There is so much room and so much time for you to really push and question your main characters but it just doesn't get used.
Honestly I think the protagonists all could have probably really benefited from the audience getting to hear their internal monologues if they weren't actually going to talk to their companion characters, but even that would just be a substitute for decent writing.
Either way, after that, we come back to Connor and Hank, who do almost no tasks in this chapter, *but spend the entire time TALKING.* They talk to each other in a constant volley back and forth for the entire length of the chapter and it's probably one of the best chapters in the game, it's certainly one of the most important in their story. You spend the entire bridge scene learning more about Hank and Connor's inner worlds, and how they think, and how they feel, you spend the whole chapter learning so much about their perspectives, this chapter is all about asking the hard questions about both of their individual characters, and the tension is high, it's a straightforward chapter to play, and it really fucking feels like your choices matter here, there will be immediate consequences, not just walking through your environment trying to find the right answer, or being dragged through an interaction. It's just plain good.
And then Markus infiltrates the Stratford Tower, and you get the most boring and useless and frustrating chapter in the game that doesn't seem to serve any purpose beyond looking cool. If Kara's last chapter was only to gain sympathy and create some soft and fuzzy feelings, this chapter is only about looking cinematic. This is probably my least favorite chapter in the game, honestly I've just gotten lost on that yellow ass office floor building too many times, even though I'm very familiar with the game now I still managed to get lost again last night.
I will admit that eventually it does become an opportunity to decide between pacifism and violence but that seems to be the only real development for Markus, and it wouldn't have been hard to make that kind of opportunity in another setting. Because we get next to nothing watching him get past the front desk, or from walking around that floor, just some outfit changes and pretending to be a machine and a little more Android hate in the background, Markus is almost completely silent yet again, there is almost no talking with North once she appears. We actually get more about North's personality here than Markus', she just feels like she has more lines somehow, because sometimes she just talks without it being connected to the plot and Markus never does.
This bit is more speculative, but my fiance and I were going off last night about whyyyy did they have to break into the tower? We're never given any reason for what the steps are and why they are important, just usually pretty important in these mission impossible type scenes, they're usually explaining in a voice-over why they are taking the steps that they are taking. But we get no explanation for why he needs to go to the 47th floor or whatever, No explanation for why he needs to change into a maintenance Android uniform, why North was in the stairwell, how Josh and Simon got in, it's all just handwaved, and whyyyyyy they couldn't have just?? Made a recording and then hacked the station's broadcast remotely and basically just posted the speech? I don't know, it's just a particularly frustrating chapter to play, personally, but it isn't strong.
Either way, you've got two chapters with next to no character development, that just have a lot of empty space and time where the characters could have been talking or could have been doing something else, but didn't because the vibes were more important, sandwiching a simple scene with ten pounds of character development and it just feels weird. And once I noticed it, it just made the Kara and Markus chapters look incredibly weak and poorly written... And conversely, make the Connor and Hank chapter look much, much stronger in comparison.
It's like Detroit become human almost needs it's own type of Bechdel Test, just to show how much they fail Markus and Kara. "Do they talk about something that isn't the plot?"
"Do Kara and Luther talk about something that isn't Alice or getting to Canada?" "Does Markus talk about anything besides his speech for this chapter?" "Does Alice talk at all beyond basic communication with Kara?" "Does Markus or his buddies talk about anything that's not the revolution or just Markus himself?"
... They don't pass a lot.
It's just hard to take these characters above simply *likeable* when they just, don't, ever, talk. There's little to no development for Markus or Kara, and because they've just become deviants, there's hardly any character establishment in the first place, they barely even get the chance to just be flat, because if they don't really know who they are, we don't really know who they are.
Connor and Hank's friendship is more functionally the main plot, more so than the deviant investigation, and for Markus and the team, and Kara with Alice, that's simply just not the case, there is hardly any relationship, they're just in the same boat. This is why Connor got astronomically more popular, and why he and Hank have the staying power that they do.
Markus and Kara just don't ever talk, and Connor does. And I'm fucking mad about it. The amount of time that was just wasted in their stories, I could probably take a damn stopwatch to all the moments where there could have been a little something-something, and nothing was put there. It's not to say Connor doesn't get some quiet moments too but he always gets the chance to make up for it.
Even at the beginning of the Stratford Tower chapter, I noticed that they could have had Simon and North talking about something maybe unrelated when Markus walks up, but there's nothing, only silence until Markus comes in with a plan. And of course we know about every time Luther tries to bring up the fact that Alice is an android, only to be shut down and walked away from. It fucking kills me how much time Mark is has the focus of the camera but it's only so he could look cool for a minute, and share no thoughts of his own, none of his new feelings, everything is only implied and then followed by the action where he is only allowed to be the leader of the revolution and never just Markus. There's a tragedy in that, but they could have driven it home harder by *pointing that out.*
#dean talks to himself#detroit become human#dbh connor#markus dbh#Kara dbh#and it's not like i don't know there's racism and sexism in fandom and in production. obviously Connor is a white man. i didn't forget#and there's the insanity that happened with GR and creating all that personality for an asshole with four appearances throughout the game#which makes you wonder why didn't the fandom do the same for Markus and Kara bc wtf#But honestly the logic kind of tracks. GR showed so much personality and he has the benefit of being human so we can more easily extrapolat#we know what humans tend to do with their time and what they act like and we barely get to see any androids actually doing the whole#becoming human thing.#I've tried building them up in my head but I'll admit it's kind of hard. they're more blank slate than sandbox#GR is a human and Hank's foil and that's easy to extrapolate on. 900 is Connor but Better and that's easy to extrapolate on#i think we somehow see too much and not enough of Markus and Kara and it has us pressing the brake and the gas at the same time#just trying to figure them out around these points. it's like a damn maze and a lot of speculation that doesn't have anything to grab onto#it's just a damn crying fucking shame because there was so much time to spend on them and it just doesn't get spent on them#anyway rant over hope you didn't hate it
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SIDESWIPE 💥💥 DONT U TALK BACK TO UR reluctant MOTHER 😡?!??? EVEN THO HE STARTED IT BY BEING RUDE AS FUCK FOR NO REASON!! YOU HURT HIS HEART!!!
HES SO FUCKING SAD ????
#hot shot: on primus u suck aft LOL do u have something wrong with you? u should rust yourse#sideswipe: shut up >:[ !!#hot shot: :O ??!?!?!?#hot shot : ...🥺#sideswipe: ... im so sorry mom-#hot shot : ........ mean to me.. 😔#mean to his (asshole) mother 💔#in all fairness blurr was a deadbeat dad to sideswipe and hot shot i guess was ovulating that day & couldnt turn off his maternal instincts#so optimus said hey u and blurr gay kiss. that deadbeat dad's baby is now ur new mpreg baby#decepticon wheeljack deadbeat dad blurr and starscream wow hot shot u sure have a weird taste in sires#he likes them fucked up in the head so when he makes them worse he feels more accomplished#love how hot shot tries so hard to be the cool young mom to sideswipe but keeps leaving out the very important variable of his short fuse#hot shot : haha watever lol 😋! im so cool! ull love working with hot shot!#sideswipe : .... who the hell is hot shit#hot shot:#hot shot: GRRRRRRRRRRRAHHHHHHHHHHHHHGRRRRRRRRGRGGRRGGRRRRRRRR 😡😡😡💥😾😾😾‼️‼️#he went from cool to impudent in like 1 second i love u i love u hot shot my ugly hamster#i need hot shot bumblebee cliff friendship NOW !!!! STOP ‼️‼️ pitting girlbosses against each other#sideswipes celebration is so cute i love his voice. hes kinda like if swindle wasnt a greedy git#sideswipe#hot shot#hotshot#transformers#transformers armada#tf armada#' whos that 😐' '.....iAM- i aM yOu iDiOt 😾😾😾💥💥☹️😣😖😾😾😾‼️‼️‼️'
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@dogtoling and i were discussing marble having a candy tierlist stream with engel. 👍
#also do NOT look at me for writing squirter's originals DODO IS THE ONE THAT SAID THAT. IT TOOK ME OUT SO HARD MY HEAD AND MY ASSHOLE HURT#also don't worry about marble biting him his venom gland was removed<3 aaoum.#oc marble#friend ocs#doodles#splatoon
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i just feel like. i'm happy with my own company or i have very high standards for relationships with people because i don't like anyone and people piss me off very quickly and i let go of them soooo easily it doesn't even matter to me
#or maybe. the real thing is that i don't form deep connections that are hard to let go#and i don't put myself out there or be vulnerable because i don't think anyone will get it so im just very superficial while talking#or too scared#so even if they leave it wouldn't matter to me#wow!!!! nice#i think i've become so detached from feelings idk#buttttt. i used to be the one who cares. i don't give a fuck about anyone anymore i've become so cold hearted what's wrong with me#and one more thing#i've always been the person who avoids conflict so i don't lose people#and now... well#maybe i find it hard to connect with people#or maybe i'm just an asshole haha who knows#or maybe i just fall out of love with people#or maybe it's because i haven't had real relationships in my proximity since covid#so in my head nothing is real#omg i've become such an out of sight out of mind person i'm a toddler#i used to pray for this when i was too attached
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Thinking about Murderbot and ART again and how Murderbot is so adamant that ART is not its friend and that they can't be friends and okay fine it'll tell the stupid space ship about its traumatic past but only because it keeps pestering it! And alright, maybe ART can help Murderbot and do a little surgery on it and assist with uncovering the Dark Secrets™ of Murderbot's past but it's and asshole and NOT Murderbot's friend!!!
And then when Murderbot mentions ART to its clients on RaviHyral it just immediately goes for the word "friend"??? And I understand that it couldn't exactly say "there's this giant research transport AI in my feed that helps me pretend to be a human" but like. Murderbot, darling, you could have used anything. You're cosplaying as pretending to be a professional human security consultant, you could have said something like "associate" or "assistant" or whatEVER but "friend" just rolled right off the tongue there, didn't it?
Bonus from Network Effect:
#the murderbot diaries#murderbot#asshole research transport#𓄿#i am pretty sure that is the first time in murderbot's life it has referred to someone as its friend??#it definitely is the first time in the books#and then murderbot just continues to call ART its friend for the rest of the book?!??!?!#i wonder what ART felt like hearing that#a little vindicated? because YES it IS murderbot's friend now no matter how hard murderbot tried to deny it >:))#(lesson learned: if you want to make friends just do a little surgery on them)#or just a warm feeling it can't quite place because i have a feeling murderbot is the first friend ART ever actively made too??#apart from like its humans etc? but that's different!#and hearing it said out loud by this grumpy stubborn lil construct must be#nice#i just really like what they have going on okay 🥺#murderbot diaries#being very normal about ART and murderbot's friendship YET again#i wonder if murderbot noticed that it did that too??#like did it try the word out a few times in its head#tentatively just to see how it felt?#or is this one of those '20 inputs all at once while also calculating the likelihood of being attacked by evil corporates#and fighting with the risk assessment module#all while running pretendingtobeahuman.exe and TALKING to the humans :('-type situations?#so that murderbot really can't monitor what it's saying super well and so “friend” just slipped out unnoticed??
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you make really good points, I think I used the term karmic wrong sorry. I think of it more as not how I personally think he deserved all that happened to him (which thinking back os exactly what karma means, I messed up sorry), but as his fate being directly tied/parallel to anyas. I handnt noticed the toxicity of jimmy and curlys relationship, from the first playthrough I watched and the first interactions I had w fandom I saw so many ppl just. dismiss the terror Anya went through and focus too much on him as the "ultimate victim" and that just didn't sit well w me. I really dislike seeing ppl go "oh well nothing could've been done" I think it's much more complex than that. also I forgot to mention in the last ask that I really appreciate you bringing the point that this game isn't just about the harm of patriarchy but also very very critical to capitalism, I haven't seen too many ppl touch on this. I hadn't thought too deeply about how it makes "he deserved to become disabled as punishment" come up and I agree that's really messed up. I'll try watching a playthrough again with all of this in mind. but either way thanks! I really appreciate your answer 🫶🏼
I guess this is just part of being in a fandom like this. I've noticed a lot of people don't actually see posts outside of their curated view. So some people only get like anya posting or jimmy or curly and it can make it seem like that is what is saturating the conversation.
I mainly just follow the general tags and look for anything new because I'm like obsessed but I know some are only looking for what they want or believe to be the case and can get weird about other ideas.
Sorry if I came off mean its just a last few of the asks have been like circular conversations like this and its not draining per say but seeing all the nuance and details get overlooked to fit a straightforward and basic narrative really sucks cause there's a lot to explore character and theme wise.
#its like idk i feel like im yapping about the same stuff over and over and over again cause people confuse simple on paper with simple in#execution or like without the human factor like idk sometimes to humanzie Anya people dehumanize the other characters to an extent#which is also part of the systemic problem because by dehumanizing people you take away from the awareness like idk the statements#that curly was the captain and just a guy like have to exist together hes like an okay find decent even good captain just not great#hes not exceptional and i think a lot of people are acting like the game said he is when thats just jimmy like Swansea and Anya see that he#just a guy under everything else hence why they dont feed into the vitriol jimmy tries to serve about him crashing the ship and how they#talk to him pre crash even with anya i feel like people are so focused on trying to see what jimmy doesnt that they are adding intention w#where there isnt not even on like she cant be this scale more so you are treating this like everyone in this game is doing some secret gran#gambit when they are just trying to surviv in really back circumstances like having anya respond to jimmys behaviro through the#fawn effect isnt making her a weak depiction its a real response that can coexist with purposeful action because she is clearly scared of#Jimmy even if she hates and thinks he's incompentent like shes not gonna roll over for him but shes gonna be docile in his presence so he#doesnt create a reason in his head to lash out at her like people simply cannot combine concepts to create the complex responses we see in#the game and idkn why its so hard because not every statement contridicts like Jimmy is a monsterous asshole can exist with how#systematic oppression and social enabling create/allow people like him to do their worse cause at the end of the day he chose to do#everything he did despite other options vs the others trying to figure out the best option for all whether that was the best or not like#he dug his own grave vs the others sorta being lined up in front of theirs and shot like this is more interesting to me than him just being#like idk cartoonishly evil and gross and why cant concepts stakes like fitting aspects together is fun its like the worlds shitties puzzle#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anon#ask#ur fine anon im just insane and get frustrated easily when i think im explaining something bad
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i wanna quit my job so bad but i like having money obviously i just gotta make it thru the holidays at least jesus christt. it shouldnt affect me so much but i hate it so much its not even hard but still draining
#the work itself isnt that hard but dealing w customers sucks (unsurprising) and its v monotonous#but even more than that interacting w my coworkers and my managers stresses me out so much sometimes i just break down and cry after.#it reminds me sm of highschool where i was miserable and stuck in my head always cuz i couldnt tell if ppl thought i was annoying or stupid#i feel like i always say the wrong thing or come across as weird/off putting. like i just feel so so stupid constantly#when i just wanna b friendly and get my work done so i can go home.#sometimes i make small mistakes n this one lady keeps correcting me but can be quite harsh and nitpicky abt it#and gets visibly annoyed and starts telling me off but im still new cuz they just switched me to a new department. like pls im trying#actually nvm the work itself is that bad i hate standing for so long cuz the pain in my legs also makes me wanna kms#no logical reason to me why we cant have a chair to sit for even a few minutes here n there. employers are just fucking assholes#my managers have this fake niceness about them too it actually disturbs me. but im sure most managers r like that LOL so insincere#ok 2am rant abt work over . if anyone actually reads all that mess
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Look, intellectually, I understand that voting should be the beginning of one's political action and not the end, and that my individual vote is extremely unlikely to have a meaningful impact on its own, but goddamn, it would be nice if at least one of the candidates I voted for could have won.
#us politics#i know i'm posting this a week after the election#it's because they just announced the mayoral race won't be heading to a runoff#i'm not even. like. extremely opposed to the incumbent mayor#i just think he's an egotistical asshole and i'm tired of hearing his voice every 15 minutes at the airport#but also#fuck ted cruz#and to be fair. quite a few of the ones i voted for did actually win#they just weren't in competitive races#i mean. some of them were unopposed. kinda hard to feel excited about that sort of victory
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trying to finish reading dungeon meshi now that it's done and just seeing everyone in the comments talking about ships. gun to my head
#ofc anytime someone says they ship smth straight someone has to be like 'ermmmm labru and farcille are better' like. not to me.... sorry#i actually do like farcille but people are so annoying about it acting like it's 'essentially canon' that it puts me off.#tbf that why i dislike a lottttt of ships LMAO not that i'm in the habit of caring abt it too much in most media#but sometimes it just really annoys me liiike laios and marcille have just as much ship tease as farcille (if not more)#but they couldn't get naked and go in the bath together so it doesn't count ig#tbf i'm not even huge on any ships except maybe fleki and lycion. i love when two equally weird ppl love each other#also like. they already had someone in the story who was head over heels for falin and i'm pretty sure shuro and marcille act nothing alike#when it comes to her. so. eh. i mean yadda yadda subtext or whatever i guess lol but if it can just as easily read as not romantic then#i kinda find it hard to care honestly. which is why i don't really ship anything from it. which brings me back to my original point#why is that basically all people talk about when it comes to anything... it should be a garnish not the whole god damn dish#and there's soooooo much in dungeon meshi that's more interesting than romance which is basically never once a priority#anyways. i'm just being an asshole and a hater as usual so go about your business and do what you want. i'll just be mad about it alone#labru is so nothing burger though i will never understand...
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thinking about the fact that despite modern au Zuko being in therapy for his CPTSD and having made a lot of progress, growing little by little into his kind and compassionate side, some days he's still an utter mess. Thinking about how Zuko is fair and level-headed and yet sometimes his most animalistic and irrational side takes control and locks adult Zuko up in a pantry, while it rages and destroys everything he's built for himself. Thinking about the uglier sides of his trauma, those that he usually bottles up and suppresses until he inevitably can't anymore. Thinking about Zuko going through cycles of impatience, selective mutism, touchiness, defensiveness, starting fights with Sokka for seemingly no reason. Thinking about Zuko being mulish, selfish and unfair, mad with anger and grief like a rabid dog. Thinking about Zuko pushing Sokka away, and Sokka feeling so tired, hurt, rejected, angry and guilty, but not leaving because his love for Zuko is unwavering and he knows Zuko is tearing into him out of sheer desperation. Thinking about how painful it is for Sokka to see Zuko back himself into a corner and hurt himself and those he loves most. Thinking about how Sokka is the only one who possesses the required balance of patience and strictness, putting up boundaries and holding Zuko accountable and yet forgiving him when he eventually comes back around and manages to calm down the angry animal in him. How Sokka is the only one with the self-restraint to not mirror Zuko's aggression and not yell back because he knows Zuko will have a panic attack if he does. Thinking about Sokka's endless love and grace in seeing the worst parts of Zuko and giving them space to exist, and still patiently coaxing out of him the better ones that are kind, responsible, brilliant and forgiving.
Thinking about how brave and strong Zuko is, until he's hit by the cycles where Zuko isn't hostile and irritable, but scared. The phases where he's always sweaty and anxious, waking up with shaky hands and a tight chest. The 2 am mornings when Sokka has to physically keep Zuko from getting up and obsessively checking the door locks for the 6th time because even if Ozai is in jail, Zuko is sure that he'll get out and kill him. The days when Zuko is absent and yet hyperaware, easily startled by noises, incapable of eating or sitting down or doing anything at all that isn't waiting for something horrible to happen; when his muscles are tense and his jaw is clenched so tightly he ends up with a migraine, the pulsing in his temple making him cry as he throws up in the toilet. The phases where he's scared like a child and it's irrational and he feels so pathetic and ashamed but his entire body is paralyzed with fear and he shakes with adrenaline for days, barely able to function. Thinking about the times when Zuko is jumpy and easily triggered and stressed more than usual, and he tries so hard to hide it and pretend like everything's fine, but Sokka knows and misses his snarky and sexy boyfriend who's capable and smart and doesn't walk around the house with bleeding nailbeds like an anxious ghost. And yet Sokka holds his face and promises to him that he's safe and loved and protected and Sokka will never ever let anyone hurt Zuko ever again, he swears, because he loves him, he loves him so much, and repeats the same 5 or 6 simple sentences in hopes they will etch themselves in Zuko's brain and give him some relief from the terrors of his past.
Thinking about Zuko being aware that he's spiralling and not being able to take back control and prevent his self-destructive tendencies from hurting Sokka and Uncle and his friends, and feeling so ashamed and remorseful and weak. Thinking about Sokka being aware that Zuko's actions aren't a matter of poor self-restraint and nastiness, and recognizing that sometimes Zuko just isn't able to help it, and needs a hand. And so Sokka steps in and takes the lead, showing Zuko that he's loved even when he fucks up.
#zukka#zuko x sokka#it's projection hours baby#i don't think that zuko is a guiltless uwu baby incapable of handling his emotions#i actually love strong and level headed zuko with a touch of feral asshole#but that kind of trauma and deformation doesn't disappear overnight and even despite ones best efforts#interpersonal relationships can be SO hard
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John Fox is such an interesting character because he and Wally are direct parallels to Eobard and Barry. Yet the fact that John never became a Reverse Flash, and instead carried on the Flash legacy, speaks to Wally’s compassionate and begrudgingly forgiving nature.
So first the parallels.
John Fox was born in the far off future where he grew up idolizing the Flash. The Flash was his hero, his savior. When Fox's city was being threatened Fox decided that only the Flash could save them and time travelled to get help from a Flash. John wasn't able to get help but he did acquire superspeed himself after time traveling. John donned the name ‘The Flash’ and created a Flash suit out of Flash suits he stole from the Flash museum. John Fox managed to save the future version of Central City and he got his first taste of being a hero.
Already the parallels to Eobard are obvious. The Flash obsession, the time travel, trying to be the Flash, ect. The only notable difference thus far is that Eobard had to invent crime to ‘fight’ when he was attempting to be the Flash and John had a legit crisis to combat. This legitimate need for a Flash combined with John’s willingness to step up would make him more of a Wally parallel than an Eobard parallel but unfortunately for him it didn’t last long. Due to future technology Fox became redundant. There was no need for a Flash and he was restricted to permanent guard duty at the Flash museum.
Taking away the need for a Flash made him desperate to go back in time and be a hero again. When an amnesic Wally West arrived in his century Fox saw his chance. He, following in Eobard’s footsteps, replaced Wally as the Flash. John went so far as to fall in love with Linda and strain her lightning rod connection with Wally, which trapped him in the speedforce. This was known information to John Fox. He was aware that Linda’s hope and love was Wally’s only chance at returning. What John did was akin to attempted murder. John wanted Wally's life. He lived in his house, donned his name and uniform, did his job and stole his girlfriend. He killed Wally for it. It’s really not hard to connect this behavior to Eobard who has tried to replace Barry multiple times in the past.
Fox is also not a great Flash. He’s skittish. Unsure and nervous. He’s playing the part of a hero rather than actually being one. Whereas Eobard was too aggressive as the Flash, John was too timid. Both, ultimately, were poor imitations of the originals.
This is where the similarities stop. While Barry reacted to Eobard with righteous fury, Wally reacted with anger, some sarcasm and then basically said ‘goddammit John you are helping me fix this mess or we are going to die trying’. When faced with a man who attempted to kill him and take over his life, Wally could only punch the man and be mildly snippy with him. Wally didn't want Fox to be an enemy. Wally saw potential in him. Wally saw the good man and hero Fox could be.
So Wally walked John through being a hero. He made Fox fix his mistakes, taught Fox how to save the day and by the end of it Wally ended up forgiving him. He gave John his stamp of approval, called him a Flash and sent him on his way.
This was a play by play on how to create a Reverse Flash. This was the recipe. John, by all means, should have been a villain. But Wally isn’t Barry. They are different people and they react in different ways. Wally is driven by the need to see the inherent good in people. He will always give people a second chance and, because of that, against all odds, Wally walked out of there with John Fox as a trusted friend and a Flash in his own right.
#It was like John had read Thawne's 'how to become a reverse flash' book and was doing the origin story word by word#then Wally walk in and was like 'pfft. old news.' and threw a flash book at his head#Wally was so fucking sarcastic and mad the entire time but goddamn did he redeem Fox and make a hero out of him#Wally: I fucking hate you#John: Im going to punch you so hard that you skip two decades#Wally: Im going to punch you so hard that you become a good person#John: .... what#Wally: You heard me! Pick up your fucking visor! we're going evil robot hunting you asshole#dc#dc comics#the flash#kid flash#wally west#john fox
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band au eva and skuggy is a crack dynamic i think about more than i should
#eva is a uni student who thinks he has this shit figured out until he meets skuggy and decides#this is the guy hes going to prop up to idealism. this guy sucks so hard hes a loser yet hes more chill than i am.#i must be doing something wrong if this asshole is enjoying life more than me. what do you MEAN we both have anxiety.#he buys weed from him one time (shaking pupils dilated 'oh my god im going to hell im in so nuch trouvle' and he overpaid lol) and#had ONE bad trip and this guy gave him like 3 sentences of advice on how to get over it and now he's stuck with him#eva trauma dumps on him and skuggy really is about to block him but he thinks whatevers wrong with him is more entertaining#doesnt want him dead doesnt want him fucking off because hes gonna get so robbed and used. guess he'll just pay for my groceries#digital#ocs#eva#skuggy#doodles#idk theyre funny to me. i need to spin them in my head#i think about them all hanging out in band au a lot but never rlly have art ideas for them. julian n buggy r friends#band au#julian#forgit he was there
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