#happy post number 3000 guys | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jotatetsuken · 2 years ago

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I posted 2,515 times in 2022

That's 2,510 more posts than 2021!

889 posts created (35%)

1,626 posts reblogged (65%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jotatetsuken

@mrskodzuken

@hyeque

@romiyaro

I tagged 2,301 of my posts in 2022

Only 9% of my posts had no tags

#musings of an extrovert - 575 posts

#talk to aisha - 448 posts

#shyna bonds with moots - 409 posts

#icymi from aisha ♥️ - 247 posts

#shyna selfrbs - 232 posts

#shyna recs - 155 posts

#shyna rants - 151 posts

#i got mail 🖋 - 111 posts

#aisha stop breaking the queue - 102 posts

#jotaro kujo - 98 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#and able to focus intently on your goals. you fight to overcome obstacles and you don't give up easily. you probably have a mean competitiv

I sent 1 gift in 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

singing in the rain

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153 notes - Posted May 16, 2022

Jotaro Kujo Valentine’s Drabble

Prompts: “I need just one date.” “You think you can woo me with just one date?” “Absolutely.”

Thank you so much @creativepromptsforwriting for these lovely prompts <;3 @creativepromptfills it’s okay to reblog ^_^

Features: Jotaro Kujo x Reader

Scenario: An AU where Joseph, Avdol, Polnareff, Kakyoin, and Jotaro meet the reader in Japan and complete different missions before setting off on their biggest mission in Egypt. Also, Jotaro, Kakyoin, and the reader are adults here (of Polnareff’s age)

Warning: Suggestive scenes (if you're a minor and/or uncomfortable, best to stay away, or block #shyna suggestives :D), mention of injury and loss of blood, Jotaro being a teeny bit of OOC, maybe?

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day, lovelies <3 I didn't realize that Jotaro's birthday had an official date according to some websites. Also, he being my current anime boyfriend has gotten me to dream about him in my subconscious. Gaah, I love this guy. Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day and Happy belated birthday, JoJo Baby <33

Number of words: 991 ( lol it was supposed to be a drabble, oh well idc it is a Drabble xD)

Taglist: @saltyvanilla @akaashi-todorki @pencilpoked-heart @tiddieluvr @quirrrky @fuwushiguro @kagejima @ofallthingswhythis

Let me know here if you want to join my tag list for future posts, and also, for suggestions (for AUs, characters as per the character rules) and feedback regarding my writing :D

Song: Harleys in Hawaii by Katy Perry

Joseph turns to Jotaro and me and asks, “Jotaro, (Y/N), what about you guys? How much money do you have with you?” Polnareff taunted us with a smirk, “Yeah, how much do you have? Kakyoin has 85 Singapore Dollars and I have 90.”Jotaro and I smirked back with him replying, “Ah, well, I still have 2000 Singapore Dollars.” I continued, saying, “and I have 3000 Singapore Dollars. So, guess who's going to have dinner in a fancy restaurant now?”

I glance at Jotaro, who nods and lightly chuckles along with me. Polnareff's eyes widen in shock. Avdol drags him along, saying, “Now, now, let them rest. They fought the most, after all.” We laughed as they were walking away, much to their chagrin, and as Jotaro looked in the other direction, Avdol gave a knowing smile and a thumbs up, reminding me as to why I needed to make the most of this.

When Jotaro and I first met through Avdol, our personalities were too opposite for us to understand each other. We'd argue for hours on end, even when we were forced to live as roommates. But, after our first mission together, when we went back to our hotel rooms, it's safe to say that Avdol and Joseph could hear a plethora of moans, groans, and grunts coming from our room.

What started as a way of relieving stress for us, became a means of expressing that we were getting addicted and accustomed to each other's touch, voices, and presence. It definitely seemed like a toxic way of bonding, but with us finding it difficult to get along initially, it definitely seemed like the best way out. However, on the last mission, before we set out to Singapore on our way to Egypt, a sword pierced through my stomach, causing me to lose a lot of blood. I remember before closing my eyes, that Jotaro was the first person to approach me and pick me up.

When I opened my eyes, I realized we were in the hospital, and the operation was successful and I was going to recover in a week. I was in the room with Jotaro beside me and holding my hand. “You’re awake,” he replies with a smile on his face and I noticed his eyes were baggy and the tears had dried off his cheeks. I smile at him and reply softly, “hi.” He approaches me, holds my head, and places a chaste kiss on my lips. When we pull away from the kiss, he tells me, “okay, Ms. (F/N) (L/N), as soon as you get out of the hospital, we’re going on a date okay?”

I was flabbergasted by his response and I said, “I didn’t know Mr. Jotaro Kujo can be open about his feelings. Since when did that happen?” He facepalms and replies, “Yare yare, since I thought I was going to lose you, woman. You scared me.” I chuckle, perch myself up with my elbows and I respond, “Okay then, mister. A date, you say?” He nods in agreement and smiles, “I just need one date.” I raise my eyebrow at him and ask him, “You think you can woo me with one date?” He brings his face closer to mine, kisses my forehead, and replies, “absolutely.”

As Jotaro looked in my direction, he cupped my cheek with one of his hands and asked, “Okay, so (F/N) where do you want to eat?” while caressing my cheek. As a tint of blush appears on my cheeks, I shrugged and replied, “well, there's this steak restaurant 10 minutes away. Want to walk there?” Jotaro smirked and replied, “I have a better idea,” and he pulls me to a corner of the street where there was a Harley Davidson CVO Road Glide in front of us. My mouth opens wide and my eyes widen as I turn to him and ask, “Jotaro, how, how did you get this? When did you get this?” He heaves a sigh and replies, “ah well, I asked the old man for some money,” his eyes looking down on the ground.

I put my arms around him, tilt my head to the left and ask him softly, “Jotaro, what did you tell Joseph?” He takes off his cap and ruffles his hair, replying,“ yare, yare, how does it matter? I told him that I wanted to...” his voice trailing into the air as he looks in another direction so as to hide the tint of blush that appeared on his cheeks, “take you out on a date.” My eyes widen as I look at him and tell him, “oh, it's funny because I was asking Avdol's advice on the same thing,” and I chuckle while slightly biting my bottom lip. Both of us look at each other and laugh. Then he put his cap back up and said, “so both of them are helping us. Do they know?”

I replied with another shrug, “I don’t know. But if that's the case, why don't we make the most of it? We could go to an aquarium, explore it, have a nice dinner at the steak restaurant, and go back to the room and watch a movie. It's Valentine's Day, after all.” Jotaro then clicks his tongue, responding, “The date was supposed to be my idea.” He then picks me up, gives me the helmet, puts me behind him, and sits on the Harley as he replies, “However, I’m glad that you’re alive and with me. That is something I wouldn’t trade for anything in this world.” As I put my helmet and put my arms around my waist, and place my chin on his shoulder, I say with a smile, “Happy Valentine’s Day, JoJo.” He then smiles as he starts the motorcycle, with the biggest smile I think I’ve ever seen, and softly replies, “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.” I guess he did woo me before our first date began.

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161 notes - Posted February 14, 2022

'tis the damn season

features: hajime iwaizumi x gn!reader (no pronouns used, written in 2nd person)

submission for: @woahsamu’s “It's Always Been You” Collab | song: ’tis the damn season - taylor swift | type of writing: oneshot | trope: slice of life, exes to lovers | wc: 2530

summary: when you come back to japan for the holiday season, while walking along the sidewalk enjoying the snow, a chance encounter with your ex reminds you how much you miss and still love him.

content warnings: partial haikyuu timeskip spoilers, suggestive themes, hurt/comfort, talks of the breakup, talks of commitment-phobia, the reader's being called baby, love

beta reading: @mxonigirimiya @portfolio-of-dreams @mrskenmakozume (ily all thank you so much <333) | networks: @hanayanetwork @tokyometronetwork

(taglist form / library account, turn on notifications to be updated) (taglist in next rb)

a/n: when i first chartered my list of fics i was going to write for tumblr, i had a fleeting idea for this song along with iwa, and when the collab came into existence, i knew what i had to do: bring the idea to fruition. taylor swift's one of my favs (y'all know this lol), so it's no surprise that my writing's based on one of her songs. plus, I thought of creating a moodboard instead of the usual banner. also, this is based on a two-year relationship i'd had with my ex in uni before i left for the states and he decided to stay in india and prepare for civil services exam. as always, likes, reblogs, and comments, especially reblogs are appreciated.

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176 notes - Posted June 23, 2022

...That Wears the Crown ( A Royalty AU Collab)

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247 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Can I request for I want a baby prank with Guren Ichinose??? Ive been dreaming about that guy a lot recently <333

Awww sure thing Ro!!!! Guren's such a dreamy boy <3333 This gif and this website helped me channel my idea with this prompt for this scenario: Them huddled by the fireplace at night after making snow angels in the fresh snow. Oh and since it's been a while since I've watched Owari no Seraph, I'm sorry if this doesn't come out well. Oh and as a bonus, I thought of the song, Sweater Weather while writing this :D Anyway, let’s do thissss!

When we tell Guren Ichinose that we “want a baby”:

Warning: suggestive content <3, minors dni pleaseeee

Shyna's Seiyuu Birthday Celebration

He then brings his hand forward and introduces himself, “I am Guren Ichinose, the lieutenant Colonel of the Japanese Imperial Demon Army. I present to you two options: strive to live a normal life and risk being a target all over again,” then shrugs his shoulders and continue, “or you could join me and we could exterminate them together. You’ll be under my protection, I promise.” You bite your lower lip, pondering about the offer that was just presented to you. You weren’t someone that was into fighting, let alone slapping someone. But, in this cruel world that you were living in, you were needing to stand up for yourself. You then put your hand forward, accepting his offer. “I am (F/N) (L/N). I accept your offer, Lieutenant Guren,” you respond with a smile.

It’d been four years since the day that Guren kept you warm and safe from your vampiric partner, whom you'd run away from. You were working hard to join the Vampire Extermination Unit, but to no avail. It's not that you were weak. Oh, you certainly were not like the person Guren saw then. Lost, frail and having nowhere to go. You'd become stronger and smarter in your own right, being able to wield a sword faster than any of the initial candidates.

You were just too scared that you'd not be able to do your job well. Moreover, there was something that the Army didn't know: you'd begun a four year tryst with Guren. When you two weren't busy completing missions, both of you would find excuses to go to secluded places and immerse yourselves in each other.

From making out to lovemaking to doing it rough, you'd done it all. Every touch, every breath, every heartbeat. You'd made yourselves known to each other intimately.

You'd even decided to go on a couple of dates together, either by the vending machines or parks or by the fountains. His playful nature wasn't hidden from you, and he even had one of the best smiles in the entire regiment. He was also someone that valued teamwork and was strategic in his approach. It was official, you were becoming giddy over him.

But while you were slowly able to let your walls crumble down, Guren however, kept stuff to himself. While he was able to slowly reveal his past, you felt that he wasn't revealing enough. So, you came up with an idea.

You'd just come back from the hospital, where one of your friends had just given birth to a baby girl, where you'd warned your friend to run to a city that wasn't occupied by vampires yet, and promised her that you'd bring them back home safely. You'd then come outside your apartment to find Guren cladding thicker jackets on top of his uniform. He said, “Babe, let's go, it's cold outside,” with a big smile on his face. Taking you by your hand, he drags you outside into the snow, where both of you feel the chilly breeze hitting your face. Suddenly, you felt a ball of snow hitting your neck and you turn to see Guren throwing snowballs at you. You two have a good time together, chasing each other, frolicking in the snow, and making snow angels.

Later, you two come back to your apartment, take a huge blanket, sit on the couch and huddle by the fireplace. Snuggling up to him, you softly tell him with a smile, “Guren, I want a baby.”

His eyes widen in surprise as he didn't expect in the wildest of dreams for you to blurt it out. You suddenly hear his pacing heartbeat, and the moment you look into his purple eyes, he strokes your cheeks with his cold hand, asking you with a voice that seemed as calm as ever, “Are you sure that you want a baby?” You respond by nodding in agreement. You started to observe Guren even more.

“I'll think about it, okay? It's just, it's just...” You tried to complete his sentence for him, by saying, “A lot to ask for?” when he replied, “No, it's just that I've been wanting this too...” Your eyes widen in shock, “Wait, what? I thought...” He puts a finger on your lips and reply, “You thought I didn't want a baby, right? Truth be told, I wanted us to wait it out until this apocalypse is done with, because I'm scared of losing you the way I lost my family.” Your breathing hitched in your throat, with realization slowly hitting you. He's right. The war isn't over, not yet away. You nervously chuckle, “Alright, alright, chill! I was just messing around!” However, Guren's focus didn't move away from yours as he picks you up, off the blanket, from the couch in a bridal fashion. You flail your arms and legs as you protest, “Guren, babe, no....” That is when he places you on the bed, gently, as he comes on top of you and whispers, “Your wish is my command, baby....”

Finally omg! This took me a while, but I hope you enjoy it Ro! :D:D:D

265 notes - Posted February 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #ALSO THE WAY JOTARO IS IN MY TOP 10 TAGS LIKE YESS HE HAS TO BE FWKFNJFN #Spotify

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beguilingcorpse · 8 months ago

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an addendum based on suggestions from the notes:

gideon and ortus are not the same character but they were both harrow's cavaliers

gideon was replaced by ortus in harrow's memory for a while (it's ok she got better)

the other gideon and ortus also aren't the same character but gideon was called ortus for a while (see above)

gideon briefly held control of harrow's body while harrow was living out Mystery Ghost Theater 3000

ianthe and naberius (or babs, for short) are not the same character but ianthe does pilot babs's corpse around like a mech for a little while

palamedes and naberius are not the same character but palamedes does philosophically debate ianthe for control of babs's body and wins. dulcinea is also there despite her deadness

coronabeth and ianthe are not the same character but they are twins

corona and crown him with many crowns (or crown, for short) are the same character

commander awake remembrance of these valiant dead (or wake, for short) and the sleeper are the same character. she's also named after an eminem song

most of these people are also referred to with numbers and it is VITALLY important that you know which number each character belongs to

sometimes the same character is referred to by two different numbers but only because they're god's favorites

i cannot stress enough that this guy we keep calling god is not god. he is not a deity of any kind. he is truly just some dude

if you're reading this post with no familiarity with the locked tomb and you're like wow, that seems like a lot, i don't know if i should read these books, please believe me when i say that you absolutely should read them and everything ABSOLUTELY makes sense in context. i'm not being facetious. these books reveal information beautifully

happy reading!

hi welcome to the locked tomb. here's a crash course.

gideon and gideon are different characters

gideon and kiriona are the same character

gideon and pyrrha are different characters but in the same body (gideon's)

gideon is dead now so now the body is just pyrrha's

gideon is also dead, but not really? but also definitely

palamedes and camilla are two different characters who alternated between the same body (camilla's) for a while after palamedes died

now cam and pal have become one character named just paul. that's paul's body now.

harrow and alecto switched bodies for a while but it's ok they got better

alecto and nona are the same character

nona was in harrow's body but then she died kind of

alecto and the planet earth are the same character

dulcinea and cytherea are NOT the same character, but cytherea pretended to be dulcinea for a while (dulcinea was dead the whole time)

there are two different characters called teacher. one of them is god

god is actually named john but we all call him jod (to avoid confusion)

god isn't actually god

hope this helps!

#this isn't everything but there were enough things left over that i felt i should add #i am not touching the soul absorption stuff with a ten foot pole! sorry to everyone disappointed #the locked tomb #tlt #tlt spoilers #add #nat og

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phantangled · 3 years ago

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#hello #sorry I’ve been a bit inactive but I’ve been away this weekend and god it’s been soooo nice #but also I’ve come on tumblr for like more than 5 mins and there’s 3000 of you following me again wooo 🥳🥰#I lost like 500 followers during my ~hiatus~ (lol) but it makes me happy to have all of u guys <3 #so basically thank you for following me and thank you to everyone that stuck around when I vanished for a bit hehe xxx #(also I know numbers don’t count but it’s nice to know people like my shit posts 😂)#(don’t count? don’t matter? either one ahdjsn)#(so thank you again 💓💓)

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solalunar-eclipse · 3 years ago

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Sonic Boom - S3E1

Episode title: Friendship 101

Word count: about 3000 words

Author’s Note: I’m trying a rather new format for this fic, since it’s based on a TV show with various songs and camera angles. If you have any comments about whether it works well or not, please let me know!

(Also, the theme song choice is all thanks to khinesthetic, who used it here and inspired me to put it in this fic.)

[cue Mr. Blue Sky by ELO (0:00-3:45)]

[The show opens on a zoomed-out view of Hedgehog Village from above. Stone walls separate the village from the wilderness outside. There are large spaces at several points throughout the structure for entry and exit. A large patch of grass with benches scattered about sits at one end of the village, and a marketplace made up of wood-and-cloth stalls runs along one of the walls. Houses are grouped in seemingly random clusters throughout the town, and the (in)famous Meh Burger stand sits all on its own, with picnic tables spread across its wooden flooring. As the music progresses, the camera begins to zoom in on the village- then on one of the streets in particular- and rotates down to eye level to face…]

Sonic the Hedgehog walked through the streets of Hedgehog Village with a bounce in his step, occasionally dancing to the music playing through his earbuds. As he wandered throughout the town, he passed the usual people running their stores, arguing over botched orders at Meh Burger, and, at one point, Aqua the Rabbit absolutely freaking out over the loss of a single follower on Angstagram (the latest social media network for moody teens).

He did a 360-degree spin before winking and pointing finger guns at Amy Rose when he spotted her haggling with the local grocery store owner. She paused briefly to wave at him with a smile. “Hi, Sonic!” she called, completely ignoring the irritated fennec in the process.

Then, the music froze and changed to something extremely ominous as she turned around to face the shopkeeper once more. A dangerous gleam appeared in her eyes as she pulled out her signature hammer. “Now then, about those prices you’ve been setting lately…”

The song cut back in as the view switched back to Sonic, who was now moving away from the scene at a slightly faster pace.

Really, though, he was more than happy to see his other friends not long after. Knuckles and Sticks were currently busy rummaging through the town’s garbage together, excitedly chatting about the latest piece of interesting junk they’d found, while Tails was fixing someone’s broken rain gutter (and attempting to ‘improve’ it in the process, which meant that it could now measure the amount and intensity of rainfall in a storm- a very useful, though unfortunately unwanted improvement).

Surprisingly enough, as he continued on his way through Hedgehog Village, he managed to get people from a few different places to wave back at him when he said hello. Although perhaps it wasn’t quite so surprising when one considered that this was one of the most cliched opening sequences that could possibly happen in any movie or TV show. Ever.

And of course, the only logical outcome of this scene led to everyone beginning to stop their usual activities and gather in one of the few open spaces in the town, clearly prepared to break into a fantastic musical dance number straight out of Broadway. Incredibly, this was one of the few moments in which everyone in the village seemed to be able to get along…

...until Eggman’s latest giant robot slammed feet-first into the ground, sending everyone off-kilter and scrambling for cover. Shrieks of panic rose in place of the music as the villagers fled the scene to hide in their houses. The dramatic entrance didn’t just ruin the mood, it absolutely crushed it with the sheer force of its impact.

And that was, obviously, when the show really began.

[cue In Your Face by Shockwave Sound (0:00-1:04)]

[Each of the five members of Team Sonic appears on a black screen with their name spelled out in their signature colors (blue, yellow, red, pink, and green) and does a couple of cool fighting moves, followed by snippets of scenes featuring them from previous episodes of the show for about eight seconds each. All five of them then appear together in their usual fighting stances, emphasizing their status as a team.

The Eggman logo then appears in an ominous, glowing red, backlighting the doctor himself and all his creations- before the lights flick on to reveal him alone in his evil lair with a green screen behind him, at which point he shrieks and covers the camera with a hand. Then, neon blue electronic lines begin to appear across the screen and the camera spirals to follow them, selecting one particular line to trace. Not long after, said line ends at a circle which, with a flash, turns into the words ‘Sonic Boom’. Beneath the title, it says ‘Ancient Secrets’ in neon blue.]

[Then the music ends, at which point the episode title- “Friendship 101”- appears for a few seconds in the same color before the show itself returns.]

Sonic scrambled to his feet and zipped over to Tails, pulling him up from where he’d fallen after the robot’s overdramatic arrival. Amy managed to do the same with both Knuckles and Sticks simultaneously, which let Sonic stare for a moment, startled, and then promptly resolve to remember not to get on her bad side anytime soon.

Soon enough, the team had scrambled into their usual positions, ready to fight. Amy and Sticks kicked the battle off by handling the various smaller robots that threatened to get too close to their team, never faltering (and in fact seeming a bit gleeful in the badger’s case) despite the sheer number of enemies. Knuckles, meanwhile, launched Sonic bodily into the air for Tails to catch, before picking up a boulder about the size of a house and lobbing it directly at the robot’s chest.

“Hey! Easy with the boulders- QuakeBot took a lot of effort to make, you know!” Eggman shrieked from above, hovering in the relative safety of his Eggmobile.

(Relative, in this case, was of course in comparison to mixing absurdly volatile chemicals in a lab, bothering Shadow at any and/or all hours of the day, or being on Tails’s bad side when the fox had a glue gun. The doctor still remembered that situation all too well, and currently ranked it as far more terrifying than merely being punted into the stratosphere by kids under half his height and about a third his age.)

Sonic paused to stare at Eggman from where he was currently dangling in the air. A smirk began to spread slowly across his face. “…what did you just call it?”

“You heard me the first time!” the doctor roared, now incredibly embarrassed. “I named it that since it makes the ground shake when it moves, like an earthquake??”

General laughter came from the heroes assembled on the ground and in the sky.

“Argh! Nobody appreciates my genius around here! Now, QuakeBot, stop standing around and start attacking!”

“I suggested TerraBot, since it still has to do with earth and is a play on the word ‘terror’, but nobody ever listens to my ideas, now do they?” Orbot muttered irritably to himself, tucked inside the Eggmobile.

“I listen to all your ideas!” Cubot offered encouragingly.

Orbot’s mouth shifted into a small smile. “Thanks, Cubot.”

Meanwhile, Sonic had been pulled into a spin by Tails, who whirled the hedgehog around before letting him shoot downwards toward the robot in a spin dash- only for him to get caught and sent flying into the nearest house.

He shook off the surprise quickly (and apparently sustained absolutely zero damage despite having literally crashed through a house, because superpowered teenagers), darting back over to the group. “Well, uh, guess it’s time for Plan B then!”

Crickets chirped in the ensuing silence. Even the robot had stopped moving to hear what he had to say.

“And the plan is…?” Amy prompted.

Sonic folded his arms with a huff. “I dunno, I thought you guys would have one!?”

The pink hedgehog rolled her eyes at that.

Tails piped up. “I have an idea! Sonic, you’re going to need to be curled up for this, okay?”

The hero promptly did just that, before emitting a muffled “mmhmm?” from inside his layers of quills.

“Alright then, Amy, I need you to hit Sonic with your hammer right at the side of this house.”

Sonic’s blood ran cold. “Whoa whoa whoa, wait a second can we maybe rethink thiaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAHHHHH!”

He ricocheted all over the palace like a pinball, slamming into several key points of the robot thanks to Tails’s rapid calculations. However, the robot was sadly unaffected by his screaming at a pitch that came dangerously close to shattering glass.

The robot was easily disabled and the attack overall quickly repelled after that. Thankfully, it took Sonic only a moment to recover from his impromptu stint as an out-of-control projectile and get back to fighting with the others…complete with a “Let’s do that AGAIN!” moment, which was met with a resounding no from both Amy and Tails.

Their ears were both still rather sore from last time, after all.

After Eggman was punted all the way back to his island by a well-placed kick from Sticks, though, the crew was about to head over to Meh Burger for a post-battle meal when they discovered that they had an entirely different problem to take care of. The villagers, who were beginning to come out of hiding after the attack, were furious upon seeing the damage dealt to their homes and stores.

“How could you let this happen?” one shouted.

Before long, the villagers found themselves a more specific target when the owner of the house that Sonic had smashed into pointed her finger directly in his face. “This mess is awful!” she cried. “And it’s all his fault!”

Within seconds, a mob of people had descended upon the overtaxed teen.

“I’ve never known a hero so irresponsible.” one fumed.

“How dare you!” the fennec from earlier roared.

The elderly wolf of the village shook her cane at him. “Shame on you!”

Sonic could feel himself beginning to tense up as the villagers turned their ire on him. Whether or not he’d admit it to anyone, he needed two main things in order to be his usual heroic, cheerful self: open space and positive reinforcement. Right now, he was getting exactly the opposite of both of those.

And he was not feeling good about it.

He looked briefly over to his friends for help, but Sticks had already vanished, Knuckles and Tails looked more nervous than anything, and Amy was already walking towards him with that look in her eye…

“Sonic, next time you do need to work on making sure the robot doesn’t catch you, you know-”

A streak of blue shot out of the village, leaving nothing but a scorched trail of grass and the snap of a sonic boom behind.

Sonic didn’t slow down until he reached the mountains- which technically wasn’t very far from the town at all, so he ran quite a bit more after that until he ended up in the middle of the jungle. Then, he sat down with his back to a tree and his arms around his knees, feeling very unheroic and overall pretty lame.

The blue hedgehog frowned at the dirt. Honestly, some days it really did feel like nobody seemed to like him. The only person who ever even suggested he was important on a regular basis was Tails, and Sonic didn’t blame him at all for not jumping into the middle of that crowd. Tails was only thirteen to his seventeen and a half years old- not exactly an age when he should be expected to go toe-to-toe with a crowd of angry adults.

Still, though. When being a hero got him all risk (no matter how low) and no reward...it was difficult for him to keep hold of that core feeling of “I can make the world a better place to live in!”, which, despite all his other claims, was truly at the center of what had motivated him to start fighting against Eggman so long ago…

[The scene morphs in a manner which shows the lighting shifting so that the sun is overhead. A sound effect of birds chirping plays over the scene change. This implies that it’s been several hours since he first fled the village.]

Sonic was still lost in thought when the snap of a twig in the bushes made him jump to his feet in surprise. The surrounding vegetation rustled ominously for a moment...only to reveal the four members of his team in front of him. He watched them all cautiously, his expression tense. More than anything, he looked ready to run at a moment’s notice- something which only served to make his friends(?) seem a little more distressed. “Uh…hey, guys?” he began tentatively.

“Sonic, I…” Amy began forcefully, before stopping herself. At first, it looked like she was about to scold him again, but then suddenly her face fell. “Listen, Sonic, we’ve all been talking a lot about what happened back at the village…and there’s something I want to say.” She gave a slightly tired sigh.

“I know we usually like to make jokes and witty commentary, but...sometimes, the world’s just a difficult place to be in.” she said. “...so we really do need to talk about serious stuff occasionally, even though I know it’s tough for you to even mention how you’re feeling. Unless, you know, it’s ‘great!’ or ‘cool!’ or something like that.”

Sonic cringed at the mere idea, looking more and more like he thought running away was the preferable option here.

“So what I wanted to say was that in a world where there are too many people trying to beat you down...what I was trying to do was tell you how to be more tolerant, because I thought that would help. I figured you can’t change how other people are going to be, just yourself, so I hoped that might make things better.

“But...I’m not actually a licensed therapist- yet, anyway. So I might have been wrong on how I went about that. Maybe...instead of telling you off for not being able to stop all those people...in the future I’ll pull out my hammer and tell them to knock it off already. Does that sound better to you?” she asked.

The blue hedgehog froze. “Ames��I...” he croaked, trying his best not to think about why exactly it felt like his throat was so tight all of a sudden.

Sticks folded her arms. “I like that plan! Those people are way too crazy sometimes…and you guys know I have a verrrrry high tolerance for crazy.”

“We can make the villagers quit bugging you together, just like how we fight Eggman!” Knuckles added encouragingly. “It’s always better that way, isn’t it?”

There was still one person who hadn’t spoken yet, though.

Suddenly, Tails crashed full-force into Sonic, squeezing him in a hug that for once he didn’t pretend to hate. “You know I’ve always, always, always got your back, right, Sonic? No matter what?” he asked, looking up at his older brother. “Even if I don’t always know how to do it right.”

The blue hedgehog simply nodded, not trusting his voice to help him maintain his ‘cool guy’ status.

“It’s okay if you don’t feel up to talking about it now, though.” the fox added understandingly, stepping back but still leaving a hand on his arm.

“But!” Knuckles added. “We won’t tell anyone if you ever decide you do need to get some stress off your chest every once in a while!” He smacked his own chest with a fist for emphasis.

“Nobody needs to know.” Sticks growled, the camera suddenly showing a dramatic angle of her face as the lighting dropped noticeably.

“Uh…that’s kinda dark.” Sonic said, holding up a finger with a bit of a confused frown, which let the lighting and camera angle zip back to normal.

“Anyway!” The pink hedgehog clapped her hands together, turning to face the group as a whole. “What do you guys think about heading over to my house and watching some movies? I’ll even…” She sighed, her whole body slumping. “…make some messy, simple, unprofessional chili dogs. In my state-of-the art kitchen. I know Sonic probably could use a pick-me-up right now, after all.”

“Thanks, Ames! You’re the best!” the hedgehog in question said cheerfully, the promise of good food and great companionship boosting his mood significantly.

Then, his posture shifted once again into something a little more vulnerable. “And thanks to all you guys. For, y’know, everything.”

“Of course!” Amy chirped.

Tails smiled at him. “No problem, Sonic.”

Sticks folded her arms. “That’s what a team’s for, ain’t it?”

“Of course it is!” Knuckles said, in that rather confusing manner where nobody was actually sure if he understood anything about what had just happened.

The echidna actually walked over to Sonic after that particular declaration, though, placing a hand on his shoulder as his face became uncharacteristically serious for a second. “Really, Sonic, we can all help you out, alright? Nobody gets to yell at our leader without getting yelled at back!” he declared, punching a fist into his other hand.

The hedgehog blinked twice before looking up at his friend. “You…just called me the leader?”

“Well, duh! That’s why everyone calls it Team Sonic, right?” Knuckles asked with a smile, letting an awkward (but genuine) grin spread across Sonic’s face.

Within seconds, the hero found himself squeezed in a big hug from all sides by his friends- and then actually lifted off the floor through a joint effort from Knuckles and Amy.

“Guys- come on! I can’t even move here!” he cried out, his legs flailing so quickly they made a vibrating noise in the air. “Guyyyyssss….” he whined, though nobody seemed to care much about his halfhearted complaints (judging by the happy expressions on their faces).

Then, the episode began to end, as evidenced by an iris out transition. The slowly shrinking circle paused for a moment on Sonic’s current expression, highlighting it against the otherwise black screen. He now sported a sheepish, if slightly pleased smile, complete with a faint pink blush on his face from all the positive attention.

Clearly Sonic liked being, well, liked far more than he let on.

Then, the circle snapped closed with a pop, and the credits began to roll.

[Voice Actors:

Roger Craig Smith

Colleen Villard

Travis Willingham

Cindy Robinson

Nika Futterman

Mike Pollock

Kirk Thornton

Wally Wingert

Bill Freiberger

Original creation by:

Evan Baily

Donna Friedman Meir

Sandrine Nguyen

Bill Freiberger

Takashi Iizuka

Writer/editor:

Solalunar “Sol” Eclipse

Thank you for watching reading.]

#sonic boom #sonic the hedgehog #miles tails prower #knuckles the echidna #amy rose #sticks the badger #i really really hope this new format was a good idea #i just had some very clear ideas about this fic that couldn't be expressed in the usual medium of character actions and dialogue #because sonic boom is very different from the sonic games and often uses camera and music-based references #(i may not roll credits every time though- just thought i'd give it a shot haha)#anyway!#i also wanted to ask: is there a particular way people would like me to use for replying to the wonderful comments i get in the tags?#because i want to let the people who take the time to leave comments know how much i appreciate it #but i'm not sure how to go about that #any suggestions?#and finally:#next time...shadow's going to show up! i can't wait to write him #as always #thanks so much for reading!#:D #sol's fanfiction

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0xeyedaisy · 3 years ago

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Another very long and very boring post!

And Another sort of liveblogging post,,, where I live blog,,, in one post,, yeah! This time we're watching The Village That Went Mad! I'm only watching it cuz of Quackity's character /hj

Starting off strong w/ BBH's character saying "Hey lassie", love it love it

Karl abt BBH: He's roleplaying, he's doing it!!

"All of you guys put on skins"- Karl says and at the same time you can see Dream walk by in his usual skin

HELGA!! MY BELOVED!!

There are catboys in this village

Robin: I am an orphan child Karl: Don't let Technoblade see you... Robin: Yeaaah, I thought about that... (Okay, but the wiki says that this episode is set hundreds of years before the current events of DSMP and Robin seems to know of Techno, which makes Techno quite fucking old)

Helga: He (Jimmy) gave me dunderhead muffin head 3000

Okay, in this episode Karl is not participating in the rp, he's like a narrator, which is interesting! But Karl also says "Suddenly, they all realized and looked and saw, Karl Jacobs started his stream and is now staring at all of them", so it seems he's still included in the story, OH and Miles says "The eye in the sky!" which is?? SO fucking cool! Like they all see Karl and his viewers as an eye in the sky!! Hello??? I'm going insane

Karl: They feel something in them changing, each of them now acquiring a new sort of role! ... They are now realizing they are being used! Could it be in the name of satan? Or it could be in the name of content and Karl's stream, they don't know Robin: No difference!

Miles: Helga I'm with your man Bob: Sharing is caring

Bob and Helga have something going on

Karl:... and Quackity (Helga) is also gonna stand there Helga: Yeah, I will, I will, I'm a bad bitch

Robin's mom was taken from him and his dad was shipped off during the Red-Eyed village wars, so Robin decided to do medical training to save his dad, but he was shot and never found again

Catboy and Robin....brothers.......... or father and son.................family........FOUND family..............

Robin, standing in the execution cell: It's nice, I feel closer to my parents!... (HELLO?? I know he won't die but damn...)

Karl visiting Robin during the night and Robin shamefully looking away cuz he decided to save himself...... It's okay kid you're just trying to survive!!

Catboy abt Robin: What a legend, so proud of him! Robin: Thanks... (SOBS AND CRIES)

Helga, the girlboss, gonna suck off satan

Robin loves rain!!

Bob is being haunted by Helga

Cornelius: It's not me, Ponk was suspicious last round, he knew he was going to get checked Jack: Who's Ponk? I'm Jack, fail rp stupid!

Love whenever they ran an ad and advertise twitch prime and then someone will point out how they're advertising to ppl who already have twitch prime

And the villagers won!! Tbh it's a shame that this round is non-canon, it got a happy ending (Tho it is unfortunate that Helga died)

Now time for the actual canon round!

LMAO HELGA WAS NUMBER 2 TRENDING That's what she deserves!!!

Helga saw something messed up at Miles' house! He used for bait something that shouldn't be used as bait! (Bait as in fishing bait)

Catboy is blind

Robin says Catboy is like a father to him!!

They executed Catboy...And now Robin is spending the night at the execution cell............

Helga: Everyone goes to hell along with me, motherfuckers

Helga doesn't seem to like Robin much cuz she hates kids or something, but she still warns Robin that he'll die if he doesn't speak, I dunno, I just really liked this moment, esp since Big Q put on his serious voice

Helga was killed while watching the stars,,,,,

And so everyone died and Jack and Bob won!! And also Robin cuz he was a jester

Okay, we're done but I wanna look at the wiki rn

The wiki says that Ponk was a descendant of Jack, Ponk also knew from Jack (either through a diary or a word of mouth) that Helga was very respected, rich and had many connections (hell yeah!!!) Ponk even built a grave for her!!

"According to Ponk, Jack and 'Shrimpdick'(Bob) were the only survivors of the village" "The lines including the death of Cornelius and Miles may indicate that unlike what the viewers saw in the episode, the death of the villagers was not just the work of the killers, but the entire village coming together to kill who they thought were 'witches'" "Jack wrote of a strange man made of straw with eyes made of emerald (a description which matches Foolish Gamers' appearance and color scheme)" " It said that the strange man was fascinated by lemons and brought him a caravan of good and 21 'statues' in boats which were possibly the villagers. Two weeks after this encounter, Jack's writings seemed to become more and more incoherent. He wrote about cats in the walls and said that the cats murdered people. He also disliked Shrimpy's interest in his 'statues'. Then, one day, he wrote that he had a sudden urge to murder. He said that Helga was tempting but her husband needed to die, highlighting the tense relationship between Jack, Helga and Jimmy. Jack stopped writing in the journal for the next 135 days, during which most of 'The Village That Went Mad' likely took place. His last journal entry was after 'The Village That Went Mad', babbling about how only him, Shrimpy and the statues were left and that life was good." This all is just really interesting, the whole cats in the walls thing sound terrifying, and of course Foolsih being connected to this story is also cool!

And that's it, loved Helga she's the only character ever <33

Here’s also The Masquerade liveblog, I decided to put them in one post cuz they are pretty short

"Oh, I stream minecraft, don't worry I'm not poor" Hahaha yeah...

Ranbutler my beloved

Oh, a chandelier! Whenever I see those I think about Foolish losing his mind over one that he was making for the beeduo mansion

Karl, about the chandelier: Some of it is just floating... Billiam: Oh, it does that... if you have money~

"No, this is where we have the balls"

Ah yes, Oliver Arechtenshire Smichalist Cumbucket (Cumbucket is silent) my beloved

Oliver is from London

Oliver has Benjamin Button disease, he's 63, but you can call him 7 months (???)

Oliver likes to swim and party and smoke

Also, I went to the dsmp wiki to look at this episode's characters and I found out that Oliver w/o the mask resembles Wilbur! He also has two-pixel eyes!!

Billiam: My old friend, how's the business? James: It's... Billiam: How's the wife? James: Divorced Billiam: How's the family? James: Gone Billiam: It's hard to talk to you

James has been going through some shit poor man

Billiam: He streams minecraft Lyaria: Oh no... Billiam: He's very rich Lyaria: Oh! Good!

DREW P. WIENER MY BELOVED

Drew's from Texas

Drew has a stuck of guns in his closet

Drew hates London

The rich don't know what Youtube is

Ppl keep avoiding Drew in the Duck Duck Goose game

They killed Drew first fucking hell

"I can see them through the wall...MENACINGLY"

Ranbutler has a lot of milk... Like a LOT

Stuff from wiki

“Next to arrive was Lord Sebastian, a close acquaintance to Sir Billiam” (So, Seb and Bill are besties)

“James is not an easy person to talk to as he only spoke in short sentences” (He's an awkward guy)

“Lyaria, a close friend of Billiam” (Lyaria is also besties w/ Bill)

(Lyaria and Sebastian and Billiam are all besties, well, were besties)

“they found Drew's head, the rest of his body nowhere to be found” (he got decapitated)

“They asked Oliver how he ended up in the tank, but received no direct answer” (Inch resting)

“Oliver opted to play a jolly piano tune” (He can play the piano!!)

"In the next installment of the Tales from the SMP, The Wild West, it was revealed that Sir Billiam had received some amount of his wealth by stealing from the town's bank, and was wanted by the town sheriff." "In a Twitch email, Ranboo revealed that money seems to not be the only thing Sir Billiam stole. He pointed out that his Wild West character John John said that a brown haired orphan also went missing around that time. This is implied to be the butler" (Bill just steals kids)

Ok, now that’s it! I dunno why I post these, but it is my blog and I do whatever I want

#long post #very long post #Actually I should also tag it as #Lateblogging #yeah

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thepriceofbeingaroseisloneliness · 4 years ago

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“It felt like ‘Let's go as far as we can go’. Maybe this was the biggest chance we would ever get. That was the kind of things I talked with the members. At that moment, we prepared ourselves for the worst.”

Notes before reading: This is from Kaoru’s first book “Dokugen” released on October 2015 in which his articles from “Ongaku to hito” magazine were compiled, but also an exclusive interview about his life was included. I already posted the first part of this interview (Pages 62-75 if you own the book) so for Kaoru’s birthday, I wanted to share the second part of the interview (Pages 130-143). In the first part, the interview covered his childhood to his first steps in the music scene and bands. This part covers from CHARM’s disbandment to Dir en grey’s and solo activities. ---- -Is CHARM a band that was formed by classmates? K: Well, there was one classmate and me, the rest were older. If I remember correctly, they were 3 years older? Even though they were the best guitar players among the members, as I wanted to play guitar myself,I told them one of them “play the bass” (laughs). That person and the other guitarist are siblings Originally, the brother and me were good friends so it was him who told me to form a band. It was like “There is no point in keeping (the band) at local level, I want to do a band that will be a stepping stone for the time being”, “If we don’t go out, we won’t make personal connections”. -“Let's get out of Hyogo” K: That's right. Anyway, the purpose of starting this band was to "get out". There was a live house in the local area, and there were some bands that released CDs from amateurs to indies, but the bands that were popular in the local area at that time were bands that wore long-sleeve T-shirts, slim denim pants and rubber soles shoes. There were many people like that in the local studio. There weren’t many bands like us….with long dyed hair…..That’s why I the person who worked part-time at the rental CD shop was super metal and I thought “There are real bandman in this city!”. There weren’t people like that. -You couldn’t make connections with people like you. K: That's right. I rarely meet people like that in my hometown. In order to sell/promote myself, I have to go out first. That's how the band started. -What do you think that was the best thing you did when you were in the band at that time? K: Doing my best?......what could be? (laughs) Maybe I don't have a feeling of "doing my best", or I don't think I was conscious of "doing my best" for the band. Besides playing the guitar and arranging the songs, I did several things such as miscellaneous work and making flyers but I didn’t do it with the consciousness of "doing my best", I did it anyway. -It was only for fun. K: I think so. It felt like I was making song while playing around, the members also were relaxed. Someone would go home and listen to some CD and say “let’s do something like that”, others would be reading magazines or watching tv next to them. Everyone gathered after work,from 8pm to 11pm, so it was like using that time to be together having fun. -In the series you wrote for “Ongaku to hito”, you mentioned that you were doing various part-time jobs at this time. K: I was. Sometimes I worked hard/plentifully, and sometimes I only worked for 15 minutes a day -What is a 15-minute job a day? .K: A part-time job that was just going to a pet store when it was closing and put the bird cages or the hamster basket in front of the store, inside the store. The hourly wage was about 1500 yen, but it only took 15 minutes. On the contrary, I also worked part-time for 12 hours. I had a lot of jobs, I don’t know if I was skilful or I was good at dealing with things but I looked like a competent guy. After a while, my salary went up and my position went up. -Did you want to become a full-time employee? K: That wasn’t the case. After all, I was doing it while thinking, “I’m in this place now, but I’m a man who won’t end up in a place like this”. I think I had a strong consciousness like “I’m working in this now for the band”. However, my parents told me every day, “What are you doing?” (laughs). -What did you answer to that? K: “No, it’s ok”. I didn't borrow money from my parents, so I didn't bother them. -Around this time, there was The Great Hanshin Earthquake. I'm sure you were at your part-time job when the earthquake happened. K: That's right. It happened when I was working part-time at a glass factory. It was shaking around, but that always happened when a crane truck passed so I was like “is that it?”. I thought it was different from other times. When I thought about going home, the train stopped, and the ground was also cracked. On the contrary, it was like being in a scene that didn’t seem to be a real. However, the inside of my house was messed up, but it was okay. The impact of the earthquake affected many places. Many people quit bands because of that. It was just around the time I started playing at a live houses, so I was able to get acquainted not only with the locals but also with a wide range of people, so I thought “this is terrible”. -What was a thing that you could do for the first time with CHARM? K: I think it was a demo tape. I made it for the first time, so I was happy. A few years ago, I found it at my parent’s home, I brought it here and listened to it…. Surprisingly, the song wasn’t bad. The lyrics were horrible though (laughs). -But CHARM's activities ended in a little over a year. K: Well, weren’t we playing for a year? I think that maybe there was a difference in the degree of enthusiasm between the other members and me. It was like there was a wall built between me and the other members. They would talk about giving up and I was like “should we?”. However, after disbanding, the other members except me formed a band together, so I was like “Oh, so it was my fault”. Whether the demo tape sold 3000 copies, or the live movements increased, I didn't have money anyway. The more I moved, the less money I had, so I was worried. It was like “Can I do this?”. -What did you do next after the disbandment was decided? K: I was thinking about going to various live shows and look for members, when I was thinking about doing something like that, KISAKI suddenly called me. He told me “Can you join us as the guitarist is leaving?”. -It was La: Sadie's, a band formed by KISAKI. K: He wasn’t a proper acquaintance, I just greeted him at a live house somewhere so, I should say that he kind of got suddenly in touch with me? -Why was that? K: At that time, there was the word “soft visual kei”. The thing is, there weren’t bands that looked flashy/showy and cool like that. There weren’t many guys that wearing a suit and looking stylish were heavy/ extreme. That’s why, I heard that there weren’t many people who looked flashy like me. -That’s why he had his eyes on you. K: Maybe. I hadn’t seen a live show of them, but there were La:Sadie’s posters on every live house at that time. Also, even though he didn’t see our live performance over there, he just saw the flyer and contacted me (laughs). -So, for now, you went to see them playing live. K: It's the day after (CHARM) disbanded. I didn’t know how they sounded like, but when I watched them performing live, it was the type (of band) I really liked. There was no reason to turn down the offer and in a selfish way I thought “In order to join this band, the previous disband had to happen”. And I decided to join them. -When it comes to members, you can say that this band was the predecessor band of DIR EN GREY, but what was your impression of them at that time? K: It's still the same, but (my first impression was) they weren’t that good at socializing (laughs). At first it was an exploration. It was like “What should I do when I enter the studio?”. But when I went it, it was like “Eh….is it like this?”. I mean, the song writing was the same as in my previous band but there weren’t many parts to arrange. If you could make a song to some extent, it would end there. I remember there weren’t many exchanges between us like, “I want to make this rhythm here” or “Let’s take a break”. It was done exactly what the composer has done in the studio. Well, it wasn’t interesting. -Then, you came up with various ideas. K: That's right. Even at CHARM, I was just arranging rather than writing songs. - After joining under the name of KAORU, the band's recognition has even more. K: About two months after I joined, we first appeared on the monochrome page of "SHOXX". Everyone was happy at that time. Until then, even if the band name was listed in “Pia” and appeared in live house’s information places, it was like "Oh, we appeared in a national magazine!" (Laughs). From there, we advertised ourselves to sell our name, and we did various things. -How was the planning and mobilization (people who came to the concerts) of live performances compared to the previous band? K: When I was invited (to join the band,), it was a band that had already mobilized more than 100 people, so it's completely different. I remember being so excited to be able to play in front of a lot of people, it was like “This is it!”. I finally got the feeling that I was on the start line. -Did you feel like you could make it as a professional? K: That wasn't the case. After all, no matter if 3000 tapes were sold or the people attending the lives increased, I didn't have the money anyway. Of course, there was some profit, but there was more money being spent. So, my anxiety/insecurity may had been bit. Like "Can I do it in these conditions?". -You were still working part-time as usual? K: Of course. Because when I joined, I was like “As we are going on a tour now, how much should I prepare for many days”. There were many talks about money. It was a band only could play a certain number of lives . I think we played lives about one-third of the year. Even so, I feel hopeless as I didn’t make money working and writing songs. I couldn't afford to think about the future at all. It's the same for the other members, and I felt like "I wonder if this will end someday." There were many people who said "I might not be able to play for a while”. - By the way, how did you feel as a guitarist at that time? In terms of style and playing. K: It was just like playing with a heavy sound and shaking your head (laughs). The guitar solo….it's about playing a little phrase. I'm not very interested in it now or in the past. -Are you not interested in guitar solo? K: No, I like listening to them. But I don't really want to play them myself…..it’s like, when a solo is being played I don’t feel like “Hey, I want to copy this!”…. More than that, I like when the high-volume sounds get muted (laughs). The feeling is better when I’m playing the riff like *makes the beat sounds* -I'd like to ask you about bands you liked besides X at that time. Around that time, you started listening to NIN INCH NAILS and other overseas bands. K: That's right. I also liked The Smashing Pumpkins and I went to see their live performances. Around that time, I started listening more to foreign bands than Japanese bands. From Japan, I usually listened to LADIES ROOM and Extasy Records bands (Japanese label formed in April 1986 by Yoshiki). -Was COLOR among these bands (You listened to)? K: COLOR is also included. Once around that time, I got invited by a roadie of a band that was in Free-will but I thought “Free-will is scary” (laughs). I've heard rumours about TOMMY (DYNAMITE TOMMY / COLOR vocalist, founder of Free-will, DIR EN GREY’s label). He is a senpai originally from my hometown. I've never met him there, but I heard a lot about him (laughs). Later, I got to know about COLOR, and I knew that was TOMMY in the band. - And La: Sadie ’s would be over in less than a year. K: That's right. I talked with each member like "What should we do next?" When we realized, it was like the four of us like “Do you want to do a band the four of us together?”. “The feeling of "let's go as far as we can go" Maybe this was the biggest chance we would have. That was the kind of thing I talked with the members. At that moment, we prepared ourselves for the worst.” -Was it like “going with the flow”? K: We weren’t friends like everyone would go drinking together or so, it’s a relationship more like neither too close to nor too distant since that time. There were invitations from other people (bands) to join them, but at that time there wasn’t a band like us, fierce and distant. I think it was a bit like “Let’s do it together” because there wasn’t any other place. There was no other band that I wanted to play music together. From our point of view, there were some questions like “Should the band be more intense/fierce?” and also, that it must be a visually interesting band. - From there, DIR EN GREY started. K: I think we talked about how me wanted to make a band more expansive than La:Sadie’s. But the fierce part was more extreme. Perhaps it was because I was thinking of becoming a band that no one had ever seen, and that made me feel like "we are definitely doing it!" -Was TOMMY involved since the beginning? K: TOMMY will appear later. But it seems that he has his eyes on us since La:Sadie’s. At that time, TOMMY was already in charge of bands and took care of them but at that time the chance didn’t come out. But when we were going to disband….. I was told this later but it seems that TOMMY said “I’m going to get a hold of every band that these five people do (laughs)” -By the way, how was your first encounter with TOMMY? K: The person who took care of us at that time said, "TOMMY wants to meet you." "What’s that? Did we do something wrong?" (Laughs). That’s why I was nervously waiting at TOMMY’s apartment. Speaking of him, I had this image of him wearing a floral coat, a gauze shirt, leather pants and long boots, and when he came out wearing leather pants and long boots I was like “Wow! It’s true!” (laughs) -That's scary (laughs). K: So when I told him “Thank you so much for inviting me”, he told me “Keep doing your best”….I was like “Eh?”. I just met him for a while, I didn’t understand at all why did he invite me. He just told me “Take care on your way home”. After that, I came out of Tokyo, and when I started a band here, I already wrote about it in the “Ongaku to hito” series but, it was decided that we recorded immediately. -At a mobile home? K: We made the songs there. We recorded and played lives in Tokyo. Then, we had more and more chances to talk and discuss with TOMMY about the details of the live performances. The next moment, it was decided that we enter Free-will. -The situation changed since that moment. K: That's right. Under these circumstances I could concentrate on playing in a band and from that time on, producers gradually started to do their part…..Talking about a major debut become something more solid, so we were getting to go as far as we could. For the next lives, it's was like going up the stairs, step by step. Until then, I was just rushing with the flow, but I started thinking about variations of the songs, the venues for the lives became bigger, so we thought about stage development….. I started to write songs considering the singles, like “let’s make a song like this”. - At that time, did you have any dreams or goals that you all shared as a band? K: (A goal/dream) shared with the members .. .. maybe there wasn’t anything concrete. We were trying our best to keep up with the situation. I personally wanted to make an album. -Something like “We’ll play at Budokan!”? K: I don't think there was. Of course, I thought it would be great if I could play there, but more than that, the members were excited about things like "What about the PV of the next song?" . -You talked about playing a live at Budokan before your debut, but was there anything that you feel couldn’t keep up with because of how fast things were going? K: I was worried. It was like “Is it ok,can we do this?”, But when DIR started I prepared myself for the worst, it was like “let’s go as far as we can go”. After all, when we were told to come to Tokyo after the band started, I was thinking, “Let’s do this without rushing”. La: Sadie's was just hectic, “Shouldn’t it be better to solidify the base here before going to Tokyo?”, “But maybe this is the biggest chance we are going to have?”, that was what we talked about. “If we don’t go to Tokyo this time, there might not be another chance anymore”. I talked with the members if we should prepare ourselves for any circumstance and accept it or not. And we decided to do it. -Like, don't miss your biggest chance. K: Yes. Also, at that, we weren’t competing against other bands, as there was almost no relationship or interaction with other bands. There was this feeling that everything that wasn’t us was an enemy. It might feel like “We are not going to lose to any other guys, we are going ahead”. - So, the band made their major debut, but in less than a year you were back indie. How did you feel at this time? K: TOMMY suggested to do what we could do from that moment on. To be honest, at first I couldn’t keep up with that idea. I was like “Why did we come this far?”. -It’s natural to feel like that. K: So TOMMY asked me, "Would you like to do a band where an old man, president of the record company, tell you to make a song like this?". So when I said “No, I don’t want to do that”, he said “Then, to do what we want to do, let’s protect ourselves”. That’s why while I said “That’s right” I was wondering if we could do this alone. But if we had done it as a major, the band might not have been like it is now. Maybe it would be more commercial, a band that didn’t make songs as a main thing. That’s why at that time I was grateful to TOMMY and I don't think he was wrong. - It was hard to get into the several hardships of doing a band from that moment, wasn’t it? K: That's right. It's still the case now, but to tell the truth, I didn’t really have the consciousness of playing music. The feeling of "doing a band" was stronger than the sound. Even if things were hard, it felt like "We are a band". At some point, I wonder if we were chasing a longing/aspiration somewhere. But from that moment on, I think I started thinking, "Let's make a band where we can express ourselves, something that only we can do." -Was the band activity difficult after that? K: It was hard (laughs). From that time on, it was really hard to write songs, I couldn’t make songs anyway. As I always say, I’m not the type of person that can immediately shape the sound that comes out. I’ll play what I’ve made while thinking “Is this really good?”. If my guitar skills were better, it might had been possible to shape it in a cool way, but it wasn’t the case. It seems that you can't compete with your own guitar. That’s why I couldn’t intertwined everything, the rhythm, riffs, and melody in a cool way. -In other words, you have to make a song while imagining the whole result. K: But isn’t that the most uncertain part? Don’t you do it without knowing what each member is going to play? Perhaps, the biggest thing is that I'm not confident in myself. It’s like I came to this point only with heavy work (laughs) - Well then, you've made many albums with that. K: Right? (laughs) But….. I think I can only make it that way. -What was the first album that made you think "I was able to do it!" K: After all…..it's "MACABRE" (released in 2000). I felt like "I made it!" Before this one, "GAUZE" (released in 1999) contained 5 singles, so I had a strong sense of filling the gaps, but "MACABRE" has a strong sense of creating one album. Also, from that point on, not only the songs but also the consciousness of the sounds changed. The sound became very hard. -Have you ever thought about leaving the band? K:…….. Yes. Yes, there are always moments like that. But it’s not like "let's quit" but more like "want to escape". Even now, I often feel like giving up while writing songs, I feel like "I can't do it anymore". -Still, what keeps you in the band is…. K: It’s a strange way to say it, but it’s like while I’m thinking about that, there is a part of me saying, “Will you do it?”. There is another me. This one always says "Please do your best!" and the other is like "Yes, I'll do it" (laughs). In other words, everything is up to you. Another self inspires the part of me who is about to give up. It's like that. -What do you think about bands that have disbanded? K: I think it's a waste. It’s like “Why are you quitting?”. I haven't quit, so I don't know how I would feel about quitting.So, if I quit the band, it would really end there. “Let’s do a comeback”, but after all, it’s over. So, no matter how hard I think it is, I don't want to say, "It’s over". Because it’s like "If you say it's over, it's all over". -Now, I asked you to look back on your half-life as a bandman so far. What about the future? K: That's right. It’s like…. There are times I think it's not interesting anymore. It’s not interesting so I’m like "I think I can explore more" and things like that, but I get back on the rails before I knew it. It’s like “If you don’t do it with all your heart, in the end it’s going to be a band that is just active”. The more you continue, the more troubles you will have. Constantly I'm thinking about what if we can’t go ahead, but we also value our own personality, that's why you just can't do the same thing. -I feel like you are always looking for something. K: I always think about "something more". I get worried because it doesn't come out though. But the fact that the band can still do it, it’s is there. If I think “Well, someday”, I think I’d be lost. -At this point, the members are making moves with solo activities. K: After all, there are things they can’t do with DIR EN GREY, so I think they are doing it elsewhere. So, when I think about it, in my case, there's nothing I can't do with DIR EN GREY. After all, even if it is just once, before I die I have to try to make my own album, but what I want to do now can be done with DIR EN GREY. Of course, I also want to know my limits and possibilities, so I'd like to try making a work by myself someday. It's a personal goal. -You could say that this book is the first result of your solo work. K: Yes. It’s a strange way of saying it, but it feels good the first thing I put out by myself was a book. It’s like really relaxing…..you can do it without putting too much effort. Of course, this is the first time I've made a book, so I wonder if I should just put what I want to do into it. If this were a about making one album, I would think about various things like "I'm doing this song with DIR, I'm sorry". I don't have that kind of annoyance, and I can do what I want to do within myself. Also, (expressing myself) in words like this……it's a bit exaggerated to say it in this way, but I think I had a lot of things I wanted to convey in words. I also realized that.

#dir en grey #kaoru #dokugen #translation

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jingabitch · 5 years ago

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Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell ch.2

Summary: When you were ten, Taehyung adopted you and gave you a home. Now that you’re eighteen, the sudden change in your scent perplexes and confounds him.

Pairing: wolf hybrid!tae x human!reader (all bts members are hybrids)

Word count: 10.7k

A/N: Did this girl bang out 3000-odd words in one night so that she could post it before Chinese New Year so that she could reach 888 followers by CNY? Yes. Yes she did. I hope you guys enjoy this, and please share and follow for more if you liked it!!

Also, I don’t do tag lists, so please don’t ask. This story is cross-posted on ao3 (link to account on my blog) so you can subscribe there.

Series index

You’d learned years ago what Taehyung was like in the weeks leading up to his heat. Overly moody, grumpy, and most of all, hungry. It was probably his body trying to load up on calories before five or so days where there was intense physical exertion without much opportunity to eat.

It had never been an awkward thing for you – after all, werewolf heat was a basic part of their biology, so no one made a big deal out of it. And since they never said anything about your own cycle, you afforded them the same courtesy, just taking it in your stride and doing your best to make it easier on them.

So it wasn’t surprising to you when one day in the middle of winter, Taehyung wolfed down (ha) his breakfast at twice his usual speed and then started looking furtively over at your plate. Sighing, you just pushed it towards him and went to make yourself something else. You made a mental note to make more food tomorrow, and braced yourself for the coming few weeks, where he would be alternately clingy and grumpy – or, interestingly enough, both at the same time.

His heats were never a big deal for you – if he had a heat partner, you mostly stayed out of his way, and stayed with the other boys instead. They were always more than happy to spend a whole week spoiling you and getting cute cuddles. If he didn’t, you usually ended up being the one to take care of him since the others had their own schedules and were out of the house most days. It wasn’t anything much – you just checked in on him once in a while, made sure he was eating and drinking water, and maybe wiped him down if he was too sweaty.

You didn’t expect that anything would change this year, although obviously you’d missed his last two heats, which he’d spent in the military facility. In preparation for his heat, you went to the supermarket and stocked up on food that would be easy for him to eat, like fruit and granola bars, making sure to pick his favourite brand which was, obviously, an extremely fancy and overpriced one.

While you continued your preparations for his heat, blissfully unaware of his inner turmoil, Taehyung was an absolute mess. Ever since his preheat started, he’d been racking his brains for a solution to the problem that wouldn’t arouse your suspicion, and coming up empty. There was no way he could get rid of you for a week without you figuring out something was up, since you knew he didn’t have a heat partner and it had never been a thing before for you to leave.

Everything was, of course, made more complicated by the fact that the closer he got to his heat, the more he didn’t want you to leave. He would wake up in the middle of the night wrapped around you, his face tucked into your neck and his hands gripping your waist possessively, and he would be burning up, panting for you.

You, of course, didn’t suspect a thing, and it truly was a testament to how comfortable you were with him that you weren’t noticing anything amiss. It really was remarkable how much could go over your head if you weren’t looking for it. If nothing else, the fact that he’d taken good enough care of you over the years that you were so complacent and comfortable around him was slight comfort. He knew your time at the shelter hadn’t been the best, and he was pleased that he’d managed to earn your trust, even if it did increase his guilt at taking advantage of it now.

His last hope, that he was clinging on to by a thread, was that since his heat was intended for the purpose of breeding, maybe he wouldn’t fixate on you. After all, you were human – you should be incompatible with him in that way. It wasn’t much, but it was all he had to go on.

Although really, anyone could have told him that that was a stupid plan. But since he’d refused to let anyone know what was going on, there was no one around to shake some sense into him.

His heat hit while he was at the studio. It had been a bad idea to go to work today, he knew it when he took three bites of the giant breakfast you’d cooked and turned his nose up at the rest of it, but they were starting to record their new song and he’d wanted to be there.

Unfortunately, his enthusiasm meant that when his heat hit in the afternoon, he was in the studio instead of comfortably waiting at home. The bright lights and sheer number of scents overwhelmed his senses, and he ended up curled in a corner of the room, desperately closing his eyes and trying to shut the world out, his head between his knees. His ears flicked repeatedly, before laying flat against his head in distress.

“Shit… we need to get him home,” Yoongi said, watching him groan pitifully, but when they tried to coax him to move, he refused, completely non-functional by this point and so uncomfortable that he couldn’t make sense of what was happening. Jimin tried to sit with him, hoping that his familiar scent would block out some of the harsher scents in the room, like the floor cleaner, but Taehyung just groaned and turned his face away, burying it in his shoulder. The rest of them looked on worriedly – his heat symptoms had never been this bad before.

Left without any other option, Namjoon called you, hoping that the familiar scent of home would soothe Taehyung enough to stop being a moaning mess on the floor of their studio long enough to go home and ride out the heat.

You’d never gotten anywhere so fast in your life. Hearing that Taehyung was in trouble spurred you to all but fly out of your house, speeding all the way to the studio in his extra car that he never let you drive. It was lucky that you’d learned how to drive in Geochang, you thought as you zipped into the parking lot at the BigHit building and raced up to the studio.

You burst into the room dramatically, panting from your exertion, and immediately zeroed in on Taehyung, who seemed to be feeling a little better than what you’d been led to believe, if the way he’d sat up and was looking at you was any indicator. His ears perked up too, indicating that he was no longer as distressed as he’d been just a minute ago.

“Hey,” you said softly as you approached slowly, not wanting to freak him out since his animal instincts were closer to the surface than usual. And, if you were being honest, the way his gaze fixated on you was almost predatory, triggering your flight instincts. Reassuring yourself that Taehyung would never hurt you, you continued to inch closer to him.

“How you doing, Tae-oppa?” you asked softly, getting on your knees next to him and pushing his sweaty bangs off his forehead. He closed his eyes and shuddered at the touch, and you wondered at his over-the-top reaction. Just how deep was he into his heat?

You made to pull your hand back, not wanting to cause him any more discomfort than necessary, but his hand shot up and grabbed your wrist. “Y/n…” he shuddered as he breathed your name. “You came,” he continued, looking up at you far more intensely than you thought the situation warranted, his long fingers stroking your wrist gently.

Hesitantly, you replied, “Uhh, yeah, Namjoon-oppa called me to come get you. Come on, let’s get you home,” you urged, trying to pull your hand away, but he tightened his grip around your wrist and made that impossible. You raised your brow at him, wondering why he insisted on staying in that corner instead of going home where he had pajamas, nice soft sheets on his bed, and could draw the curtains so the light didn’t hurt his eyes, but he stood up quite easily without letting go of you and started tugging you out of the room.

“Uh, okay then,” you mumbled, utterly confused now. When Namjoon had called you, he’d been almost panicked, describing what bad shape Taehyung was in and getting you all worried, but the man in front of you seemed completely fine. A little off-kilter, maybe, but that was only to be expected since he was going through heat, after all.

“Bye, oppas!” you said, waving at them as Taehyung pulled on your wrist, leading you down the hall and towards the elevator.

“Well, you look pretty good for someone in heat,” you told him as you waited for it to arrive, looking him up and down assessingly. “When Namjoon-oppa called me he was so panicked, and I freaked out too, but he must have been exaggerating,” you chattered on to fill the silence. You understood that Taehyung wasn’t really in the mood to make conversation right now, but somehow his intense gaze made the quiet feel a little uncomfortable.

The elevator doors opened with a ding, and your attention was momentarily taken away from Taehyung, so you didn’t see the way he shuddered. It wasn’t that he was feeling better, it was that his heat had found a target, and all that shaky, general horniness and misery had turned into laser focus on you. You walked into the elevator with that little bounce in your step, and he followed after you, almost stalking you with how predatory his gait and gaze were.

You stopped and turned around in the middle of the lift, your eyes lifting habitually to the display on top of the doors, but Taehyung didn’t stop walking, bumping against you and causing you to drop your gaze to him. You gasped at the hungry expression on his face, but it didn’t deter him from backing you up against the wall. You squeaked in surprise as your back hit the wall, knocking the air out of your lungs, and in the second that it took you to get your bearings back, he’d moved his hands from the wall on either side of your shoulders to your waist, pulling you tightly to him as he buried his nose in your neck.

You just about jumped out of your skin when you felt his erection pressing against you, and your mind immediately leapt to work rationalizing it away. He was in heat, it was normal for him to have a boner, and it definitely had nothing to do with you, you tried to convince yourself. He was scenting you because you smelled familiar, like home, and it was comforting for him.

Trying not to squirm away in discomfort so you could help him, you stroked his hair in what you thought was a soothing gesture. “Tae-oppa, you okay?” you asked softly.

He groaned in response. “You smell so good,” he said, sniffing you aggressively as he pressed you into the wall. You gulped and looked up at the numbers flashing on the screen, indicating that you were close to the basement now. The moment the elevator door opened, you pulled away under the guise of leaving the elevator, and hurried to the car.

Taehyung insisted that he wanted to take the car he’d driven here back home, as it was more comfortable, but then refused to hand you the keys so you could drive, instead forcing you to fish them out of his front pocket. He’d boxed you in with his body against the car while you’d done it, too, staring at you so intently that it made your face heat as you averted your gaze, trying to grab his keys without any accidents.

When the keys were finally in your hands, you slipped into the driver’s seat, trying to avoid staring at Taehyung as he went around to the other side of the car and slid gracefully into the passenger seat. You didn’t know what was going on, but you weren’t prepared for any of this, and it was making you slightly uncomfortable, especially because you couldn’t be sure that you didn’t like it. As inappropriate and wrong as all of this was, as much as you knew that this was just because of his heat and to entertain any fantasies would be taking advantage of him in this vulnerable state, there was a part of you that felt a sliver of interest. That, under all the fear and discomfort, had thrilled at having

As you started the car, you studiously ignored Taehyung. He huffed and undid the top few buttons on his shirt, then fiddled with the seat so that he was in a more comfortable reclining position. Your mind raced as you drove home – he’d never acted like this with you before, and you wondered if he was okay. The heat seemed to be worse than in previous years, and he must be really out of it by now. Was it even possible for him to get through this heat without a partner?

At a red light, you snuck a glance over at him, relieved to see that his eyes were closed and he seemed to have fallen into a light doze. That was good, you thought, your heart warming at seeing his cute sleeping face. He should get some rest while he could, because it seemed like this heat would be hard on him. Your heart squeezed – it seemed unfair that hybrids had to go through this, and you wondered why on earth your ancestors had created hybrids this way.

After parking the car, you looked over at him and bit your lip. You didn’t really want to wake him up now that he seemed to be sleeping rather comfortably, but unfortunately there was no way that you would be able to carry a fully grown hybrid back to his apartment, so reluctantly, you reached over to shake him awake.

“Tae-oppa?” you called quietly. “We’re home.”

He stirred and looked at you with half-closed eyes, before nodding listlessly, and you felt like the scum of the earth for even entertaining the thought that his earlier actions were an advance, and especially for that tiny bit of arousal that you’d experienced feeling his erection dig into your belly earlier. He was clearly in a vulnerable position, and here you were, misinterpreting his actions and taking advantage of him by enjoying what his hormones were making him do.

It would do you well to remember that it was your ancestors who had made him like this. In a way, it was kind of your fault that he had to go through it, and you promised him silently that you would do whatever it took to help him through this.

You slid out of the car, then hurried over to the other side to help him out. He seemed a little woozy and weaker than normal, but otherwise fine, and even managed to get himself back to the apartment without any difficulty. A light sheen of sweat coated him by the time you’d reached the apartment, though, and he made to go straight to the bedroom, but you managed to coax him to take a shower first since it wasn’t likely that he would get another one before his heat ended.

“Tae-oppa?” you called as he was headed into the bathroom, already stripping his shirt off.

He grunted in acknowledgement, but didn’t turn around or stop.

“Do you want me to call someone to help you with your heat? Maybe Minhee-unnie, or Haeun-unnie?” you suggested some of his previous heat partners, girls he’d hooked up with regularly in the past. There were also services that provided heat partners, but you didn’t know if anyone would be available on such short notice.

Taehyung thought about it. It would probably be smart to find a partner to ride this heat out – it was hitting far stronger than he’d anticipated and he could scarcely think straight, especially now that he was in the apartment where your scent was so incredibly intense and mixed so thoroughly in with the smell of home – but the thought of having a heat partner strangely made him feel almost sick.

“No, it’s okay,” he responded brusquely, too out of it to temper his tone, and closed the door behind him in the bathroom.

Shivering, he stripped out of the rest of his clothes and stepped into the shower, turning the handle to the coldest setting possible. He hissed and growled in displeasure as the ice cold water hit his skin, but he knew it was necessary. He was burning up, way too hot for a usual heat, and even in his compromised state of mind, he knew that this could be dangerous if he didn’t cool down, and quickly.

The cold shower didn’t do much for the desire raging through him, though, and he rested his forehead against the cool tile of the shower stall and groaned. He was completely losing it, he could tell, and probably terrorizing you. He felt like an awful owner. You were so innocent and good, coming to get him from the studio, and he’d responded by basically assaulting you in the elevator earlier.

“Fuck!” he growled, slamming his fist into the wall. Even knowing that he was garbage wasn’t enough to stop him from recalling how amazing you’d smelled, how soft you’d felt under his hands, the way you’d melted against the press of his body in the elevator. You always smelled good to him, especially since he’d been discharged from the military, but today it seemed different. Better. The scent emanating from you was just slightly warmer, sweeter, spicier than the residual scent you’d left all over the apartment, including in the bathroom. In his heat-addled state, he couldn’t figure out why, but it was messing with his ability to keep his head on straight in a big way.

With another growl of frustration, he wrapped his hand around his cock, knowing that there was no way he could go back out into the apartment in the state he was in. It was fast and rough, and his orgasm was unsatisfying, barely enough to take the edge off the all-consuming hunger that bordered on pain, but he felt his mind clear just enough that he remembered all the reasons why bending his pet human over was a bad idea.

He got out of the shower and dried himself off perfunctorily, wrapping the towel around his waist because he hadn’t brought in fresh clothes. He was collecting his dirty clothes to drop into the laundry basket when, as he stood up, he caught sight of the box of tampons you’d left on top of the toilet. He rolled his eyes and huffed in annoyance – you were always forgetting to put them back under the sink after your period was over. It was one of his biggest pet peeves, the way you would just leave things lying around and causing clutter.

Wait a minute. He frowned again at the box. You’d had your last period a week ago, which meant…

Fuck.

All the pieces fell into place in his mind then, and it took massive amounts of restraint to avoid sending his fist clear through the wall. You were ovulating, which is why you smelled so good. All his hopes of not fixating on you during this heat were dashed. In previous cycles, he’d noted your ovulation because your scent had shifted, but it had never affected him much before. Now, though, that he was in heat, the scent that indicated your fertility was overwhelming, stripping all restraint from him. The mere thought of cumming into you and getting you pregnant had his wolf instincts rising, the hair on the back of his neck prickling as his erection ached and his balls drew up, desperate to fulfil their purpose.

This isn’t right, the part of him that was still in control screamed, but that voice was quickly being drowned out by his hormones. This was bad, he needed to lock himself in his room before he did something he couldn’t take back.

With that thought in his mind, he wrenched the bathroom door open, and the cool air from outside the bathroom felt nice and calming on his overheated skin, helping him to maintain some sanity. Thankfully, you’d gone into your room and shut the door, and he made a beeline for his own room, thinking that as long as he didn’t see or smell you, everything would be fine.

Unfortunately, thinking that you were being helpful, you’d gone into his room while he was in the bathroom to leave some water and snacks. He could see a few bottles neatly lined up on the bedside table, and the rest of the carton was sitting on the floor in a corner of the room. You’d also arranged the energy bars and fruit on the table, within easy reach of the bed. His heart clenched at how thoughtful you were, but even the short amount of time you’d spent in his room was enough to leave traces of your scent in his room.

Groaning, he shut the door behind him and threw himself on the bed, facedown. He landed with his face in your pillow and growled, biting down on it as he impatiently stripped the towel off and threw it into a corner. His hands clenched into fists as he swiveled his hips, pressing his painful erection into the sheets.

In the state he was in, thoughts about how wrong it was to get himself off to your scent flew right out the window as he took deep huffs of the pillow that had become saturated with your scent from months of you sleeping on it every night. As he worked himself closer to orgasm, he imagined that instead of the residual scent you’d left in his bed, it was you, warm and soft and pliant, letting him fuck you, use your body as he needed. You’d be so sweet to him, he thought, cooing at him as you wrapped your arms and legs around him, stroking the back of his neck and letting him mark you up as he plowed into you. Even in his fantasy, he wasn’t able to be gentle with you, holding the pillow between his teeth as he imagined the tender skin of your neck and collarbone in its place. His wolf instincts running high, he shuddered as he found his release to the picture of you he held in his mind, letting him fuck a whole litter of pups into you.

“Y/n, shit, fuck,” he groaned as he came, holding that sweet fantasy close as he rode out his orgasm. Floating high in its wake for a moment, he rolled onto his back and shut his eyes, enjoying the small aftershocks running through his body. He wished he could just stay in this moment for the rest of his heat, where the consuming need had abated somewhat, but before the clarity of mind orgasm gave him made all his guilt come flooding back.

He was a terrible, shitty hybrid and he was definitely going to hell. The thought made his ears droop sadly, but at least you weren’t here to witness his descent into madness. You were too good to him, such a sweet pet, he mused as he grabbed one of the bottles of water you’d so kindly put within easy reach and gulping it down. He wished he at least knew why this was happening all of a sudden. He’d never heard of or read about hybrid-human relationships, even though he knew that technically he was part human as well. It was all very confusing and scary, made worse by the fact that he had to hide what he was feeling from everyone, especially you, for fear that you would see him differently. He’d worked so hard to make sure that you felt safe in his home, and all of that would go down the drain immediately if you found out how alluring he found your scent now, and how difficult a time he was having keeping his hands off you.

In the midst of his heat, even the thought of you finding out that he was unabashedly using your scent to get off didn’t fill him with horror and shame as it should have. Instead, his mind started to conjure up fantasies of you biting your lip, cooing his name when you found what a state he’d worked himself into. Imaginary you stroked his fevered brow softly, pressed a soft kiss to his forehead, then slid your hand down his body to grasp his erection as real Taehyung did the same thing.

He’d already cum twice, so he could take his time a little more, stretch out the teasing and immerse himself in his fantasy. Sinking his teeth into his bottom lip in an effort to muffle the whine he could feel building in his throat, he exhaled shakily. You’d be so sweet to him, stripping out of your clothes without him asking, leaning over him to kiss him sweetly. Your soft, gentle kisses would contrast against how confidently and tightly you were gripping his cock as you jerked him off, letting him moan and whimper into your mouth.

He wouldn’t be pliant for long – no, even in his fantasy he was needy, burning up, and you were the only thing that could save him from certain death. It would barely be a minute of you hovering over him, your hand on his cock, before he wouldn’t be able to take any more teasing. He’d grab you and flip the both of you over, so you landed on your back with him between your legs. He shuddered at the thought, turning onto his belly with his face back in your pillow, stacking his fists under him so they made a nice, deep hole for his cock to drill into.

You’d be wet and creamy already, letting him slide through your folds without any resistance. He thought about how soft and tight you’d be as he ran his fingers down your slit, stretching you out for his cock. Even in the state he was in, he would be careful not to hurt you, to prep you well so that when he finally took his rightful place deep inside you, there would be nothing but pleasure. Biting his lip, he slowly fucked into his fists, mimicking the way he would enter you for the first time.

Fantasy you arched into him and moaned helplessly, your walls tightening around him rhythmically as you adjusted to his length within you, and liquid heat pooled in his lower belly as he thought about the cute, breathy sounds you would make for him. Would you beg him for more, or tell him it was too much? He rather liked the idea of being too much for you, he found, enough to ruin you for any human man or hybrid who came after him. If he had his way, you’d always be his.

He groaned and huffed as he picked up his pace, rutting into his fists as the head of his cock brushed against the sheets. Thousand thread count sheets and yet the fabric dragged almost unpleasantly against the oversensitive flesh, far rougher than he was sure your silken heat would be.

As he jerked himself off relentlessly, he imagined that it was you he was plowing into, biting savagely into the pillow as he imagined that it was your neck he was marking up. His climax was close now, he could feel it, and he panted heavily as he strained for it. “Please,” he grunted, his voice muffled by the pillow. “Please, I need it.”

Like a wish granted, his orgasm washed over him, and he shuddered all over as he came to your scent again. “Y/n,” he groaned, your name like a prayer on his lips as copious amounts of cum landed in a pool on the sheets. “Fuck,” he breathed, right before he collapsed into a heat nap.

Almost two hours had passed since you’d gone into your room. You’d spent it comfortably enough, curled into your oversized armchair reading, but it was almost dark out now and you were getting hungry.

Putting your book down and removing the noise-cancelling headphones that ensured you’d be able to look Taehyung in the eye once his heat ended, you opened your bedroom door and poked your head out slightly hesitantly. Once, when you were thirteen, you’d been careless and just waltzed right out of Yoongi’s room and run into a very naked Taehyung gulping down water in the kitchen, and it had scared the crap out of the both of you. Needless to say, ever since then you’d checked to make sure the coast was clear before going anywhere in the apartment whenever any of them had their heats.

When all you saw was Taehyung’s closed bedroom door further down the corridor, you slipped out of your room and into the kitchen, tying your hair back into a ponytail as you gathered up ingredients. You didn’t know if Taehyung was up to have a full meal, but if he was, a nice, soothing soybean stew ought to hit the spot. Already licking your lips in anticipation, you put the earthenware port on the stove and turned it on, humming to yourself as you prepared the food.

When it was done, you left it on the stove and went to get Taehyung. Sometimes even during his heat he would be capable of coming to eat a meal with you, and you figured it was worth a shot. If not, you could always eat alone and leave the stew for him to reheat when he felt hungry enough.

“Tae-oppa?” you said softly, knocking on his door.

For a second, there was no noise from inside and you assumed he was asleep, but as you were about to walk away you heard a rustle, and then he said, in a slightly slurred tone, “Come in.”

You opened the door, and were immediately assaulted by the smell in the room, but you tried not to wrinkle your nose as you stepped in, knowing that Taehyung would be able to see it even in the dark. “Oppa, I made dinner, do you want to come join me?”

Your eyes were still adjusting to the darkness of the room, and you were hardly able to see anything, but you heard Taehyung moving and assumed he was coming to join you for dinner. Starting to turn around to exit the room, you were caught off guard when he instead pushed you up against the door, which in turn slammed shut. The air was knocked from your lungs and you saw stars for a moment, standing still in his grasp as you tried to figure out what just happened.

Taehyung, however, immediately took advantage of your confusion to crowd you against the door with his body. Your frame was completely dwarfed by his, one of his hands on your hip while the other was pressed to the wood beside your ear. “You smell so goddamn good,” he groaned as he bent to press his nose to your neck.

Now you were confused for a whole different reason, because his words, his proximity, the bare erection he was pressing into your belly, all of those things confirmed beyond a shadow of a doubt what you’d earlier tried to deny to yourself. For some reason, your owner wanted you, and you didn’t know what to do.

“Tae-oppa –” you said timidly, trying to extricate yourself from this situation, but as he dragged his tongue up the length of your neck, right to your ear, your words cut off in a choked gasp. You shuddered involuntarily, hating yourself for reacting when you knew how wrong this all was.

“Y/n-ah, you smell so good, so ripe,” he said against your ear as he started to swivel his hips, thrusting against you. Against your will, your core clenched, and you cringed as you felt a rush of wetness escape you. Your vain hopes that he didn’t know how wet you’d become, even with his heightened hybrid senses, were dashed when he groaned again, this time a long, low sound full of agony, and pressed his lips to yours.

You were stock still for a moment, your mind blanking out, unable to comprehend what was going on. Every instinct was screaming at you to get out of there, that this was wrong, bad, sick, but your hands wouldn’t cooperate, half stretched out but not touching him, just hovering over his body.

“Y/n, it hurts,” he groaned, resting his head against your forehead and panting heavily. It sounded like there wasn’t enough air in the room for him, and you could empathize – the uncomfortably warm and humid atmosphere wasn’t comfortable for you, let alone a hybrid going through heat at the moment.

“What’s wrong, oppa?” you asked, stroking your hands down his side in a bid to bring him comfort, your initial reluctance to touch him or do anything that might give him the wrong idea forgotten in your haste to do anything that might make him feel better. Even touching his bare sides confirmed to you that he was burning up, and he usually ran warmer than you did as it was. Frowning, you tried to touch his face, to see whether he was feverish enough for it to be dangerous. If there was something wrong this time – and based on his strange behavior, you were already inclined to think there was – you had to call someone to come help him immediately.

A sob ripped through him as your hand landed on his face, and he nuzzled aggressively into your palm. “You feel okay,” you murmured, stroking his cheek with your thumb. He was warmer than usual, but not so hot that you were alarmed.

Instead of responding to your comment, he begged again, “Please help me, Y/n-ah.” The abject misery in his tone tugged at your heartstrings, and in that moment you knew you would do anything if it prevented him from suffering any more.

“What do you need, Tae-oppa?” you asked quietly, steeling yourself for what was pretty sure would be the reply. By this point, you weren’t even thinking about whether or not you personally wanted to do this – and you were fairly ambivalent about the whole thing, if you were being honest – and your entire paradigm shifted, with Taehyung in the center of it.

Instead of answering with words, he bent down slightly and hoisted you up with his hands on the back of your thighs, slotting himself between them neatly as he pressed you into the door. In this position, his prominent erection rubbed against your core, like a fiery brand burning through your shorts and panties.

You whimpered. You didn’t know which way was up – it had been so long since you’d broken up with your ex back in Geochang, and you hadn’t had any action since, and the way he was moving against you triggered every carnal instinct you possessed. At the same time, your rational mind knew that this was wrong, that he was a hybrid and you were a human. You were different species, for God’s sake, and you’d never seen him in any light other than as your owner and guardian. Somehow, though, none of that mattered when he made another pained noise.

Hesitantly, you slipped your arms around his neck and started kissing him back. Your tentative overtures were nothing like the way he greedily devoured your mouth as a precursor to the way he wanted to eat you alive, but his reaction was dramatic enough that it didn’t seem he minded too much. Pressing you back more firmly against the door, he slipped one hand from your thigh up your camisole, his long fingers stretching up your ribcage.

You shivered at his touch, although you weren’t sure whether it was in arousal or revulsion. Nevertheless, you steeled yourself and let him grope you, kiss you, do whatever he wanted. You were quickly realizing that you would do anything to help Taehyung, even give up your own body. After all, he was the person who had saved you all those years ago. It was the least you could do for him, no matter what your personal thoughts on the matter were.

Still, there was something about how enthusiastically he was kissing and touching you that was incredibly persuasive, stirring something deep within you that wanted to respond in kind. Slowly, your kisses became bolder, and when you tentatively swiped your tongue against his bottom lip, his whole body shuddered in a way that made you feel powerful.

“Fuck,” he growled, and still holding on to you, he turned and strode over to the bed, dropping you unceremoniously down on it. You’d barely landed when his hands were at work again, hooking his fingers in your waistband and pulling down your shorts and panties at the same time.

“Fuck,” he repeated more softly this time as he dropped the discarded clothing carelessly. He levelled his body over yours, an elbow planted into the bed beside you to help balance himself as he slid his other hand down your soft belly to your pussy. You widened your legs accommodatingly to his touch, biting your lip to stay quiet when his hand slid over you, just a little too hard to be pleasurable over the sensitive flesh.

“Shit, this heat is going to be the death of me,” he huffed, sounding more lucid now that you were under him than he had at any point before. He settled between your legs and bent his head back down to rub his nose against your neck again, but that one throwaway comment stuck in your mind, causing you to stiffen under him uncomfortably. Your stomach twisted unpleasantly in panic as you realized what you’d almost done. He was in heat, unable to think straight, and instead of protecting him from making a hormone-fueled decision that he would definitely have regretted as soon as his heat passed, you’d been about to enable it.

Whatever arousal you might have been feeling evaporated in an instant, shame and horror filling you instead. Taehyung was so out of it that he didn’t notice the chance in your body language, but he sure as hell noticed when you tried to scramble away from him, though you weren’t very successful since his entire weight was pressing down on you, pinning you in place.

Still, you made a little headway squirming away from him before his eyes opened wide again and he frowned down at you, pressing his hips more firmly down into you to pin you down. “Stop,” he protested. “What are you doing?”

“Oppa, we can’t do this,” you cried out, distressed, as you continued to struggle away from him. But he was bigger and stronger than you were, and pinned you down easily.

“Why not,” he whined, his breath ruffling the hair by your temple. He was still panting heavily as you squirmed under him, and you stopped, realizing that your movement was making the situation worse. In your despair, tears began to prick at your eyes, and the scent of your distress, cutting sharply through the intoxicating aroma of your arousal, gave him pause.

“Baby, are you okay?” he asked with some concern, lifting himself off you slightly so that he could peer down at your face. The moment you felt his weight leave you, you used your newfound leverage to push him so hard he lost his balance, falling to the mattress next to you. You wouldn’t have been able to do it if he’d been expecting it and bracing against it, you knew, because he was just so much stronger than you naturally.

In a flash, you were up and running for your life, sprinting for his bedroom door. You didn’t bother grabbing the rest of your clothes, knowing there was no time. Even with the head start you’d gotten on Taehyung, you knew that it would be close when he snarled and pushed himself off the bed, chasing after you.

Shit, you swore to yourself as you ran for your bedroom. It loomed ahead of you, seeming to get further away as your vision narrowed in your panic. You could hear Taehyung thundering down the hallway after you, and with his longer stride and superior hybrid strength, he was gaining on you at an alarming pace. Even though you knew this was probably nothing for him, he was panting loudly enough for you to hear it, and you cringed as you remembered how alluring the chase was to wolves. Did Taehyung have that in common with them? You were starting to realise that despite being with him for so long, there were enormous gaps in your knowledge about him. Of course, you’d never expected that you would need to know such intimate details about him, but here you were.

You ducked into your room and slammed the door shut just in time, wincing as you heard Taehyung crash into the solid oak with a furious snarl. You flipped the lock into place right before he started abusing the door handle, banging loudly and pulling way too hard on the handle as he yelled for you. “Y/n-ie? Baby, please unlock the door. Just talk to me, baby, I just wanna talk, I won’t do anything else, please.” He continued to beg and wheedle, his voice turning into a whine.

Oh, God. You had no clue how to handle this, and it was turning into a nightmare. You backed away from the door, trying to give yourself as much distance as possible to think. You had to call for reinforcements, you knew. There was no way in hell you were going out there, and Taehyung was out of his mind right now.

Running your hands through your hair in stress, you picked up the phone that you’d thankfully left on your bedside table instead of on the kitchen counter. There was only one person who could help you, you knew. Namjoon.

You sat on the floor with your back against the door the entire time you waited for him to arrive, trying to offer Taehyung comfort and companionship without actually opening the door, which you knew would lead to something you couldn’t take back given the state he was in. He’d given up on yelling and trying to break into your room, since the door was sturdy enough to withstand his efforts to knock it down. In utter despair and misery now, he was on the floor whimpering and whining, and your heart broke with every sad, pathetic noise he made. It took everything in you not to open the door and give him what he so desperately wanted, and it was only the knowledge that he would hate himself, and you, once the heat passed that gave you the strength to resist.

Thankfully, Namjoon had a key to the apartment, because you didn’t know how you would have gotten all the way to the front door to let him in with Taehyung still camped outside your bedroom. You knew when he arrived because Taehyung’s sad, soft whines transformed into angry growls. He was infuriated at another hybrid encroaching on what he considered to be his territory during his heat, with his bitch in the vicinity, and you were terrified that he would actually attack the older man, yet another thing that he would hate himself for when he was back in his right frame of mind.

Grateful that you’d thought to dress yourself once you were back in your room, you opened the door, distracting Taehyung from Namjoon as he immediately attached himself to you. Patting his back while trying to keep his hands from straying to inappropriate places, it took you a moment to realize that Namjoon had brought Yoongi with him, and you squinted in confusion at the snow leopard hybrid.

“You should stay with Yoongi until Tae’s heat passes,” Namjoon explained. “I’ll keep an eye on Taehyung.”

That sounded like a good idea in theory, but how poorly Taehyung had reacted to having them in his apartment during his heat made you skeptical of how it would play out. Even now, Taehyung’s distraction was fading away, and he was standing protectively in front of you as he growled threateningly at the intruders.

“His instincts are amped up because of you, for some reason. If you aren’t here anymore, he should calm down.”

You chewed on your lip indecisively. The doubt in Namjoon’s voice made you want to protest, to reject his proposal. How could you endanger both Taehyung and Namjoon on a hunch?

Really, though, what was the alternative? You couldn’t possibly give in to Taehyung; he would be filled with regret and self-loathing once he returned to normal, and you needed to protect him from that.

“Okay,” you acquiesced finally. You tried to step around Taehyung to go to Yoongi, but he whipped around, alarmed.

“Baby, what are you doing?” he asked, panicked, his arms wrapping around you immediately.

“Oppa, let me go, please?” you begged softly, hoping futilely that Namjoon and Yoongi wouldn’t hear your conversation with him. Somehow, this felt too intimate for anyone else to witness.

Taehyung brushed his thumb along your cheekbone, wiping away the stray tear in what had to be the most tender gesture he’d made towards you since his heat started. “Don’t cry, baby,” he whispered, his forehead resting against yours. “I’ll give you everything you need.”

“Tae-oppa, I’ll see you after your heat, okay?” you managed, forcing the words out past the lump in your throat. “Be nice to Namjoon-oppa. I love you.” You’d said it to him so many times before, but it carried a different weight this time that you didn’t want to examine too closely.

“Y/n-ie…” He didn’t let you go, but his grip loosened ever so slightly, and you took the opportunity to twist yourself out of his embrace, and hurried over to Yoongi. He gave you a small smile as he held his hand out to you.

As you left the apartment with Yoongi, you heard Taehyung give a heart-rending roar, and almost said to hell with it and ran back to him. As if sensing your internal conflict, Yoongi’s hand tightened on yours, making it impossible for you to leave his side.

You sobbed in the car all the way to Yoongi’s apartment, the reality of everything setting into you only after you’d left the situation, and the adrenaline that had kept you going left your system. You didn’t understand what was going on, but the pure misery you’d heard in Taehyung’s voice as he called out for you stayed with you. It was your fault somehow, you knew. Taehyung was suffering because of you, because of your ancestors, cruel people who’d made him the way he was for their own selfish purposes. Everything was your fault.

For the next four days, you barely left Yoongi's guest bedroom. He gave up trying to coax you to watch Netflix with him or come to the studio to interact with the other members. Instead, he left you alone for the most part, only coming to get you when it was meal time or when he had an update from Namjoon.

Apparently, after you'd left he'd barricaded himself in his own bedroom and hadn't left. Namjoon was trying to get him to eat a proper meal, but it was tough - thankfully, there was still the stew you'd cooked and hadn't gotten a chance to eat on the stove, because it wasn't like Namjoon was capable of cooking a nutritious homemade meal from scratch. After several attempts, Taehyung had finally allowed Namjoon to hand him the meal on a tray, which he ate in his room and left the empty dishes outside the door after.

Apart from that, you didn't know much because he wasn't interacting with Namjoon, so your secondhand information was limited at best. It didn't really help your anxiety about the whole situation, but at least you knew he was alive, and you'd really left enough food and water in his bedroom for several heats, so there wasn't a problem on that front.

You used the time, instead, to think about what had happened during the first day of Taehyung's heat. For the entire four days you were at Yoongi's, you basically thought about nothing else. He'd wanted you. Now that you were thinking about it in that light, a lot of the other strange things he'd been doing made a lot more sense. He wasn't just reacting to your familiar scent, or pack bond, or whatever bullshit it was that he'd been feeding you. You realised with a start that he'd been attracted to you.

That realisation didn't make you feel better - in fact, you had more questions than before. How long had this been going on? How could this happen? Was this normal? Was he normal? And, most importantly, how did you feel about it all?

With so much time on your hands all of a sudden, you thought about it obsessively, and cycled through almost every possible emotion.

First came the knee-jerk reaction of disgust and horror, of course. How could this happen? How could you let this happen? You sobbed as you thought about how wrong all of this was, how weird, how inappropriate it was that Taehyung was attracted to you, a human and his pet, for God's sake. And he'd fucking lied about it too, feeding you that bullshit about his pack bond and lulling you into a false sense of security so you'd continue to stay with him, when he should have told you what was happening and let you move away as soon as he started feeling this way.

But then - and almost against your will, because you did not want to start empathizing with him and trying to justify the shitty things he'd done to you in your mind - you started to see things his way. If it was so wrong to you, it must have been a million times worse for him, the one who'd been caught so off-guard by these new, entirely unexpected emotions. He must have been blindsided, felt so lost and scared, when he realised what was going on. Your traitorous heart felt a pang of sympathy for him. Of course he hadn't wanted to tell you; he'd probably not even been ready to admit it to himself.

Lying on your back and staring up at the ceiling, you tried to sort out your thoughts. Whether you liked it or not, you were programmed to want to please your owner, and that included understanding them. Your psyche had done its job and let you understand, with very little information and no help, Taehyung's motivations and frame of mind.

What it wouldn't help with, however, was understanding how you felt about all of this. You sighed and rolled onto your belly, burying your face in the pillows, stifling the urge to scream in frustration.

You knew you cared about Taehyung. Despite everything else, that hadn't changed. You couldn't forget the way he'd taken you in, given you a loving home and everything a human could possibly ask for, and asked for nothing in return. He'd even done his best to hide his growing desire from you when - let's be real - he could have acted on it whenever he wanted. It's not like anyone would believe you over him. You loved him, and you were so grateful to him for taking you in when nobody else would, and saving you from a miserable childhood in the shelter. Everything you had - everything you were - was because of him.

Still, you couldn't quite shake the feeling that this was wrong, that it was immoral and inappropriate and sick to be in a human-hybrid relationship. Not after everything that had happened between the two species. Not when you were literally different species.

With a groan of despair that was muffled by the pillows, you flailed a little in frustration. What were you to do? You were still no closer to an answer than you'd been when you'd first started thinking about all of this literal days ago.

Namjoon didn't know - and, God willing, would never know - that Taehyung had found your discarded shorts and underwear on his bedroom floor after you'd left, and had been using that to help him get off ever since. In the state he was in, he wasn't even capable of feeling shame or remorse at what he was doing, and was just ecstatic that he finally had something better than your residual scent on his sheets to get off to.

He sniffed at the crotch of your panties - buried his face in them, really - licked and sucked at the stains that your arousal had left in them, and tried to memorise the scent as he masturbated furiously throughout the entire four days of his heat. By the end of it, there was barely any trace of you left on the scrap of fabric, something he bemoaned as he worked himself to the final unsatisfying orgasm of his heat.

His whole room was a mess - it stank of sex and debauchery, and there was cum all over the place - the floor, the pillows from when he'd rutted them, all over the sheets. As he fell into a deep sleep, he wondered if you'd be able to smell it, even with your weak human nose, when you came back.

He kind of hoped you would. His heat-addled mind wanted you to know what he'd done for you.

When Taehyung woke up, finally lucid after running through his heat, the first thing he did was remove your panties from his mouth. He grimaced in disgust - how had he literally fallen asleep with them there? God, he was truly awful - and tossed them aside, grabbing a half-finished bottle of water from between the pillows and downing it. He was parched, and the the water in the bottle wasn't enough for him.

As he got up on shaky legs to grab another bottle from the corner, he recognized for the first time how ravenous he was, and after picking up his water, brought it with him while he left his bedroom for the first time in days to find some food.

Thinking that he was alone, he didn't bother getting dressed, so when he reached the end of the hallway and entered the common area of the apartment, he screamed like a little girl and ran all the way back to his room in embarrassment when Namjoon, sitting on the couch with his Kindle, turned around to see him in his full naked glory. It was nothing the older man hadn't seen before, of course - you see all sorts of things when you live together for as long as they had - but it was still embarrassing, especially after so long being apart.

By the time he re-emerged sheepishly, fully dressed, Namjoon was waiting for him with a smirk. "You didn't need to react like that, you know," he teased.

"Yeah, yeah," Taehyung grumped. "I'm starving, is there anything to eat?"

Namjoon rolled his eyes. "What do you think this is, Masterchef?" he quipped. "I just called for delivery, it should be here soon," he continued.

Taehyung, on hearing that, gave his leader his best boxy smile. "Thanks, hyung! You're the best!" he cheered, going to sit on the other end of the couch to wait.

Namjoon, figuring that he would leave the questions till after the other man had eaten, went back to his Kindle. Taehyung, though, seemed to have other ideas.

"Hyung, have you been here all this while?" he asked curiously.

"Uh, yeah," Namjoon replied. "Somebody had to take care of you."

"Where's Y/n?" came the next question.

Namjoon hesitated then. "How much do you remember?" he asked cautiously, not wanting to say anything that might startle or upset Taehyung.

"Uhh..." Taehyung frowned, thinking hard. "I remember Y/n smelling real good," he said, shivering at just the memory of it. "Then she was in my room, under me... then..." he trailed off, his eyes widening in horror as he started remembering in detail what had happened.

"Oh, my God," he groaned, burying his head in his hands. "I'm awful," he said, beginning to sob.

"Hey, don't say that about yourself," Namjoon said, alarmed, drawing closer as he patted the younger man on the back comfortingly. "You're not awful, you were just caught up in your heat, that's all."

"No, you don't understand!" Taehyung cried out, obviously distressed. "I'm the worst; I'm a disgusting hybrid and pet owner, and I should be put behind bars for Y/n's safety, and probably the rest of society, too," he finished miserably, his ears drooping.

Namjoon tried to calm Taehyung down to explain what he meant by that, but before he succeeded, the food arrived, and with that distraction readily available, the younger man clammed up as he stuffed his face full of japchae and kimchi stew to avoid talking.

Eventually, when everything had been finished - even the weird sweetcorn banchan that no one ever finished - Taehyung couldn't put it off any longer.

"You'll hate me," he protested dejectedly when Namjoon tried again to coax him to spill the beans.

"Bro, if I didn't hate you after you threw up all over me when you had food poisoning, how could anything make me hate you now?" Namjoon countered reasonably.

That made sense, so with a heavy sigh, Taehyung told Namjoon the entire sordid tale. The words came out stiltedly at first, then started pouring out, as Taehyung started speaking faster and faster, until it sounded like he was the rapper in the group. The more he spilled, the lighter the weight on his shoulders became, as if by telling someone else, he was transferring the burden. Namjoon, to his credit, listened quietly, his expression remaining open and neutral as he took in Taehyung's story, interjecting only to ask clarifying questions but never to pass any judgement.

When Taehyung was finally done - he left out the bit about him using your dirty underwear to get him through his heat, because hyung or not, there were some things that should be kept to himself - he leaned back against the couch cushions with a heavy sigh. This was it, he knew. No matter how accepting his hyung was, there were some things that were just too much, and this was one of those. As he'd been telling the story from the beginning, starting from the day you'd come to pick him up from his army base, how awful it all was hit him again, amplified by revising the entirety of how he'd abused you and your trust.

"So you see," he concluded his story with a small sigh, "I'm a disgusting pervert who should probably die for the sake of society."

To his shock, Namjoon leaned in and squeezed his knee. "Don't say that about yourself," he castigated. "I'll do some reading and see if I can find out more about this, but you shouldn't panic, okay? I'm sure I'll be able to find an explanation and solution for you. Trust your hyung."

The way he said that, so sure and steady, made Taehyung relax, almost against his will. Namjoon had been there for him for almost half of his life now, and he knew, from the determined set of his jaw, that he would come through for him again.

"Okay."

After their conversation, Namjoon texted Yoongi to let him know that the coast was clear and quickly made himself scarce, not wanting to get in the way of whatever emotional reunion you were going to have, knowing Taehyung.

Yoongi, for his part, tried his best to get you back home as quickly as possible, and you didn't have the heart to tell him that you would actually have appreciated a little more time away from Taehyung. You felt bad, but you were still so unsure about everything that was happening, and you were, if you were being completely honest, a little afraid to go home and face him.

Which led to you, standing outside your front door like an idiot, your fist raised to knock, but unable to actually do it. There would be no going back from this, you knew. Nothing would ever be the same again, one way or another. Was it so wrong of you to want to keep things the way they were, just for a second?

With a heavy sigh, you dropped your fist against the solid wood of the door, wincing at the loud sound it made. Almost too quickly, you heard the patter of footsteps as Taehyung raced to the door and opened it.

"Hi," you breathed awkwardly, standing like an idiot with no clue of what to say or do all of a sudden.

Taehyung, it seemed, had no such problems as he pulled you into a hug and kicked the door shut with his foot. "Y/n, you came back," he breathed into your hair as he squeezed the life out of you.

Even though you'd been so nervous just a second earlier, being in his warm, familiar embrace made it feel like everything would be okay again, and you couldn't help but melt into his embrace. "Of course I came back, oppa," you said quietly into his chest.

"I thought... I thought..." Taehyung choked up and he couldn't continue as he dissolved into sobs. "I'm so sorry!" he cried instead, over and over again as you soothed him, telling him that everything would be okay, that you would always be here for him, that you were never going to leave him no matter what, as you stroked his ears comfortingly, the way you knew he liked.

"Hey, it's okay," you repeated as you patted his back, leaning up on tiptoe to press kisses to as much of his face as you could reach. And it was. Just being with Taehyung, in that moment, gave you a clarity that you hadn't been able to find after days of agonizing over it. Taehyung had saved you, and you loved him. It was as simple as that. And listening to him blubber about how sorry he was, how he'd work on it, he promised, how he'd never do anything like that again if you would just forgive him, you knew that whatever Taehyung wanted, you'd give to him, no matter how you felt about it.

"It's okay," you said one last time as his sobs petered out. "Whatever you want, it's okay."

Taehyung didn't fully register at the time how much you meant what you'd said to him that day, but he would soon.

It was weeks later that Namjoon finally made a breakthrough on his research. Weeks of obsessively searching, trawling through endless pages on the dark web and the dregs of reddit, before he finally found something. It was an old research paper, hundreds of years old, published by a now-defunct, of course, company that had manufactured hybrids. The paper was titled "Research advancements in imprinting technology in hybrids".

"Oh my God," Namjoon breathed in shock and horror as he skimmed the paper. This was way more serious than either he or Taehyung had initially thought.

#btswritingcafe #magicshopnet #bangtansmutcentral #btswriterscollective #kim taehyung #taehyung x reader #bts #bts fic #bts hybrid #bts hybrid au #hybrid bts #taehyung smut #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #park jimin #jeon jungkook #bts future au

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break-slash · 4 years ago

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Puzzleship JP & KR Fancomic Recommendation List

UPDATE (19-12-2020): Added two more artists and two more titles on the Japanese lists!

I don’t consider myself as someone very tidy and organized, but I just like making lists of the things I love, somehow. Hence this post. I haven’t been in the fandom for long but I thought I’d share some of my favorites primarily from two sites: pixiv and postype. Most of the postype ones are behind paywall, and I will mark them differently.

Some of my favorites come from the same artists, so I’ll also link their pixiv profile on top of my favorite work of them.

(I actually bookmarked a lot and picking them isn’t an easy task, so I will update this step by step. If you see only a link of an artist, that’s the reason, but I can guarantee you will love their works! Feel free to recommend me yours through reblogs or DM as well!)

Japanese

Artist: CYHGM

She is a Chinese and is more active on Weibo (she posted tons of puzzleship there, but my Mandarin is beyond rusty so I could only cry in despair lmao), but she has two fancomics that I absolutely adore of. Those two mentioned fancomics are:

The Past and The Future. You can check my translation for this one here. It tells about Atem who gets transported to 3000 years later before his coronation, and that’s where he met post-canon!Yugi. Just... everything about this comic is so wonderful. I teared up at the last page, not gonna lie ;_;

The Pharaoh and The Fairy: An Ancient Egypt-slash-fantasy AU featuring the S0/TOEI casts. The fairy Yugi was saved by Atem, and it’s an obligatory for fairies to grant their savior’s wishes. However, Atem doesn’t exactly have something he wants of, and this confuses Yugi on how he should repay him back. Pure undiluted sugar, and fairy!Yugi is just so cute.

Artist: Fushitas

Arguably one of the most popular Puzzleship fanartists in the JP fandom (look at their number of followers on Twitter, man), but maybe it’s also due to the fact they were in AoT fandom too. They’re mostly active on Twitter, and if you also watch Zexal, they draw tons of Yuma-centric pairings too. They have released lots of books, and their prices on the reseller sites are... well, let’s just say, unbelievable. Just to show how famous they are.

From everlasting to everlasting: Set after DSOD. A mysterious figure appears in front of Atem, claiming to be his queen. Everyone in the after life somehow acknowledges this person, which makes him even more confused because he’s the only one unaware of this. On the living realm, Yugi who is on the way to his home got hit by a truck (isekai much??) and when he woke up, he suddenly plays the role of Atem’s queen. I’ve always adored Fushitas’ drawing, and this is no exception. The story is pretty simple, but is still good! The ending of this comic is everything I’ve always wanted from the canon lol.

The King’s Guest: Ancient Egypt AU. The councils are starting to get worried because Atem shows no interest in marrying someone, so Shimon opens up a “chance” sort of for civilians to become “someone for the Pharaoh to talk with”. The civilian Yugi takes this chance right off the bat, and stuff happens? This one is just so sweet and the misunderstanding later in the story kinda cracks me up. I really love the way they build the two’s chemistry in here.

Artist: usi

They only draw two puzzleship fancomics, but both are so good and explores the themes I’ve loved from the pairing.

The Lotus’ Devil: Set post-canon with a flashback. It tells about Yugi’s regret in the past where he wanted to show Atem a small pool supposed to be full of lotus flower only to arrive seeing them not blooming. Fast forward to the post-canon, he found out that there’s actually a monster residing on that pool. I really, really loved the ending scene of this one.

Who’s The Detestable, Fortunate Guy Here: I think this is set sometime in the canon story, although the exact timing is unclear. It’s a short comic of Yugi asking Atem to pretend to be his date and go on a “dating practice”. A very pleasant hurt-and-comfort kind of story, and who doesn’t love a story of them dating anyways? :”D

Artist: Houzuki Anzu

She doesn’t draw much YGO, but she has some Arc-V and 5D’s fanarts too if you watch the series!

Hourglass: Sets after the Memory World arc. Yugi keeps hearing a strange sound inside his mind, and he finds out there’s a huge hourglass standing there, guarded by the will of Millenium Puzzle. Apparently, the hourglass is linked to Atem’s remaining time in the living realm? Anyways, the ending of this comic might look like a cliffhanger, but I personally think it isn’t. I love the theme this comic picks to explore and the way it is presented.

Present: Same setting with Hourglass, but this one focuses more on Atem sorting out his feelings about the Ceremonial Duel and what he has learned from Yugi in general. It’s a very nice extra detail that the canon slightly lacks of, and I just love... bittersweet stuff in general haha.

Artist: Chiriko

Are you the type who wants puzzleship to be full of happiness and fluff and nothing else? Well, she has a number of comics to fill that need! I actually love all of her works, but if I have to pick, these two are my favorite:

...Don’t Ever Leave Me Again: A short story about Yugi having a nightmare of where he was stuck in the fire accident at Otogi’s store. Well... this isn’t a fluff sort of, but it’s... a happy ending still? /shot

[Untitled]: A dialogue-less comic, but this is the sort of post-canon what-if that I really, really like. Atem stroking Yugi’s face while sleeping is just... so soft man....

Artist: Komori Nea

Their art style was one of those that’s very noticeable and has a certain charm on it. They are pretty active on Twitter, and even draws puzzle comics once in a while that haven’t been uploaded to pixiv (which is why I recommend you to check their twitter gallery too haha)

The Soul Stays Awake: Post!DSOD. Atem comes back from afterlife in hoping that Yugi would be as happy as he is, but months after, Atem’s existence still hasn’t been registered on Yugi’s life just yet. Another post!DSOD take that I like which involves the fear of another farewell and uncertainty, but this is a good hurt-and-comfort. I swear, it’ll hurt you just... for a while. :”)

The Attack’s Aim: Set during the canon series. A short comic mostly portraying Yugi’s hidden strength but also the tenacity of duelist that is not only targeted toward the opponent, but also to Atem, without the person actually noticing it. The last page of this one is so... soft and gentle I had to put it into this list.

Artist: caf

Often draw with S0/TOEI style, characters and characterization in mind. Their coloring in illustrations is so soft, plus artists who specialize in S0/TOEI style can’t be found so easily. Their comic style is not a manga-like one and they write the dialogues with handwriting, but if you can read hiragana and write and understand how kanji works (so you can write it on translation machine), their comics are easy to understand!

magenta: S0/TOEI AU where Yugi and Atem are two separate person. A short comic of Yugi lying under the rain as Atem searches for his whereabouts. I really love the way they portray the rain and the atmosphere surrounding the scene. Or maybe I’m just biased with rains in general, ahahaha.

Yuugi and Mao’s Stay Home: Same AU as above. Our two boys has to face the same shit we do IRL in this comic, which is quarantine. Atem offers to cook something for Yugi since he can’t eat outside. You love seeing Yugi eating stuff? This is a perfect comic for y’all.

Artist: Kkyut

Artist: Kayu(i)

Others:

Gemini: As Atem comes back to the living world, Yugi faces the dilemma of having being separated by “his other self” physically and mentally. A short comic, but the lines the artist used are so... beautiful. Like, the way they describe Yugi’s loneliness?? Just hits the park so much.

Until The Hourglass Runs Out: Set after the Memory World Arc. As their farewell day goes closer, Yugi decides to give Atem a full control of his body at school so he could spend his time with Jounouchi and the gang more. However, things don’t go as smooth as Yugi had expected. If you like that little teeny weeny pain before the Ceremonial Duel, this comic perfectly suits the taste.

see you sometime: Post-canon. Mahaad offers Atem a chance to meet Yugi in the living realm one more time, but with several conditions. Firstly, he could only stay for a day at maximum. Secondly, Yugi won’t be able to remember who he spent his time with after Atem hangs out with him. Thirdly, Yugi will not be able to “recognize” this Atem; he will only be registered in Yugi’s mind as a new classmate. A bittersweet comic in whole, but seeing the two having fun like a normal teenager would just makes me grin.

After The Rain: A dialogue-less comic, so everyone would be able to read this right away. A short comic of the two, but still very cute and wholesome!

The Tropics of Horus: Post!DSOD, Atem has to chase Kisara who lingers around Kaiba’s soul and he needs Yugi’s help to bring Kisara back to afterlife, but he has his own ulterior motive. This manga is so dialogue-heavy and might be hard to dissect especially if you don’t understand JP grammar and context, but the time spent trying to understand the meaning behind every words will be worth it. That much I guarantee. Just... everything about this comic, and how Atem’s “ulterior motive” connects to our boys’ adventure in canon series are so well planned. You can also purchase the R18 version in a form of the book here (toranoana)

Christmas Day: S0/TOEI puzzleship hint (dark puzzle???). There’s something in store for Yugi in Christmas, but this one might surprise Yugi a lot. It’s not that the prompt of “Atem gets separated from Yugi temporarily” is uncommon, but it is still a sweet one and makes you smile throughout the pages.

Korean

All titles mentioned here are not free unless mentioned otherwise. Also I don’t understand Korean except being able to read Yugi and Atem’s name, so my story interpretation might be wrong. If you understand Korean, I’d really love for you input! ;_;

You can check out on how to buy comics from postype here

Yugi’s 2020 Birthday Anthology: Rain and After End

This is an anthology consisting of four titles, but they share the same (or similar) setting where Atem is reincarnated, but he doesn’t remember his past (or has not yet, depending on how the story portrays it). Some are age-gap (adult!Yugi and high school student!Atem), so you might want to consider that if it’s not your cup of tea.

To Like Someone is to...: Age-gap setting. Mostly tells about how Yugi deals with his feeling as the reincarnated Atem in front of him turns out to have a feeling on him. I like how the story’s conclusion is that Yugi will sort it out slowly while also teasing Atem how he’s “too early” to date Yugi w.

In A Circle: A story about how the two met through an online chess game. Iirc Yugi works in a game company and Atem is sort of a famous e-sports player in this setting. There’s a lot of dialogue in this one and the app sometimes can’t process them very well, but I liked what I can understand from it! not very convincing is it haha i’m sorry i shouldn’t have done this

Familiarity: Age-gap setting, where Yugi becomes Atem’s caretaker. The comic mostly focuses on how Atem notices how kind (or too kind) Yugi is sometimes, but there are times where he feels distant. The plot where Atem gets into a fight with the other kid in his school because the kid mocks Yugi, and how Yugi just... accepts it even when Atem doesn’t want to say his reason of punching the kid is just.... god... I love this kind of age-gap setting like this I guess ;_;

Touchdown: Age-gap setting, but Atem is older in here (university student). The two goes to Atem’s university festival and they think about their own feeling when they got separated. On their way to drop Atem off, he confesses to Yugi, but Yugi is still unsure on his overlapping feeling between the reincarnated Atem and the Atem he knows. Make sure you play Motohiro Hata’s Rain and Aimer’s After Rain during the car scene to make the “rain” mood works even better :”)

Others:

Try For Point: A continuation of Touchdown, where Atem (like, the one from the past) visits Yugi in his dream and helps Yugi in sorting out is his feeling toward his reincarnated self. Atem’s advice is so sweet and there’s one certain line from this comic that I remember very deeply - there’s a part where he says, “If you don’t pull out the card, you won’t know what card it is, right?” to help Yugi clearing out his hesitancy ;w; at this point, I curse myself for not being able to understand Korean

#puzzleshipping #blindshipping #ygo #im sorry if i can't make a precise description...#will be updated regularly as i scan through my bulky bookmarks

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jotatetsuken · 3 years ago

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Jotaro Kujo Valentine’s Drabble

Prompts: “I need just one date.” “You think you can woo me with just one date?” “Absolutely.”

Thank you so much @creativepromptsforwriting for these lovely prompts <3 @creativepromptfills it’s okay to reblog ^_^

Features: Jotaro Kujo x Reader

Warning: Suggestive scenes (if you're a minor and/or uncomfortable, best to stay away, or block #shyna suggestives :D), mention of injury and loss of blood, Jotaro being a teeny bit of OOC, maybe?

Number of words: 991 ( lol it was supposed to be a drabble, oh well idc it is a Drabble xD)

Taglist: @saltyvanilla @akaashi-todorki @pencilpoked-heart @tiddieluvr @quirrrky @fuwushiguro @kagejima @ofallthingswhythis

Let me know here if you want to join my tag list for future posts, and also, for suggestions (for AUs, characters as per the character rules) and feedback regarding my writing :D

Song: Harleys in Hawaii by Katy Perry

#tw suggestive #shyna muses #Spotify #jotaro kujo #jotaro x you #jotaro x reader #jojo's bizzare adventure #jojo no kimyō na bōken #jean pierre polnareff #noriaki kakyoin #joseph joestar #mohammed avdol #shyna suggestives #jotaro fluff #drabble #anime drabble #musings of an extrovert #✊🏻 jotarna

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argylemnwrites · 4 years ago

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Live And Die This Way

Pairing: Colt Kaneko x MC (Ellie Whitnall)

Book: Ride or Die (post book 1)

Word Count: ~5900

Rating: R (language, brief 30 diamond content - N*FW, referenced violence)

Summary: How do you create the life you crave? And what is the cost?

Author’s Note: Written for @rodappreciationweek Day 4 - MC. This is a direct companion piece to my Colt entry “He Knew” and will reference many of same events covered there, but it does stand on it’s own. This piece was envisioned first, with my Colt piece kind of springing forth from the future I saw for those two while crafting this fic. In addition to the content mentioned in the rating, content warning for infidelity.

Ellie didn’t know how to feel about college. Not so much about her coursework - that always made perfect sense after years of AP and honors classes. More about her “college experience” or whatever cliche phrase described how it was to just live as a freshman in Turren Hall on the west side of Langston’s quad.

She liked her independence. She could eat what she wanted, go where she wanted, do what she wanted. If the end of her senior year had been more traditional, she probably would have been buzzing from all of her freedoms. She had her first taste of alcohol. She made out with a cute boy at a house party. She ate ice cream for dinner and ordered pizza with Rebecca, her roommate, at midnight. She was enjoying herself.

But her new friends acted like these little things were the pinnacle of independence, and it was hard for her to relate to that. Not when she’d experienced the thrill of pushing the speedometer up over 100 MPH, felt the power of an engine revving at 5000 RPM, and jumped from moving vehicle to moving vehicle at highway speeds.

She liked her new friends and classmates well enough, but she never talked to them about who she’d been in Gramercy Park. She didn’t bring up the MPC and her brief time with them. She certainly never mentioned Colt.

It’s not that she disliked college, she just was struggling to put it all together, the person she was in New Hampshire with the person she’d become in LA. On the weekends, she found herself just going on drives, trying to reclaim that thrill, that rush. She found a county highway about 20 miles from campus where she could floor it and feel the speed settling deep into her bones. She always went on these trips alone, even as she started seeing Chris more and more often. He wouldn’t get it.

Chris wanted to officially be her boyfriend. She’d sensed it for months, but he finally asked her one Saturday in April. His roommate had gone home for the weekend, so Ellie had spent the night in his room. She liked Chris well enough. He was a chemical engineering major, he was cute, and with his short, curly, blond hair, he looked nothing like either of the guys that had turned her life upside down one year earlier.

The trouble was any connection between them was superficial. On paper, they seemed so similar - both of them had been valedictorian, science and math nerds, only children raised in protective Catholic households. But he only saw “Langston Ellie,” he only liked that part of her. He didn’t have this drive for something more - more thrilling, more adventurous, more stimulating. So she kept things between them casual, and when summer break rolled around and she made her way back to LA, she didn’t feel any guilt about trying to track down Colt.

He must have gotten a new phone with a new number as part of his plan to “lay low” and evade arrest, and Kaneko Auto Shop was still a boarded up shell, scorch marks visible along the walls. But she eventually found him, less than 36 hours before she was leaving, of course. It was almost fitting, seeing him at the sideshow, the place where she’d first met him. She wasn’t sure if he saw her, but she spotted him right away, standing off in the shadows, talking with a couple of men, wearing that same leather jacket.

At some point, he must have noticed her, because he couldn’t just let her dance with Darius and Riya. Instead, he’d wrapped his arm around her waist, and it was like stepping into a time machine, as if no time had passed, as if they’d seen each other last week, not last year. Riding back to his new place and falling into bed with him was the first time she’d felt truly awake in ages.

Any illusion that sex with Colt just seemed better than sex with Chris because he’d been her first and she hadn’t had a point of comparison went straight out the window. It wasn’t that sex with Chris was bad, but with Colt… it was raw and primal and intense, and those were not ever words that could be used to describe Chris. Chris in bed seemed scared he would hurt her, so he just tried to coax her to the peak of pleasure. Colt wanted to stake claim, to possess her, to drive her higher and higher. He knew how strong she really was, and it made her heart soar.

She knew she was heading back to New Hampshire, and that tonight with Colt would be just that - one night. It’s why she didn’t ask him about the Brotherhood. Hearing about his inevitable ventures into bloody vengeance would just lead to a fight, and there was little point in ruining this little moment in time with that. This was a reprieve, not a promise, and that meant some things were better left unsaid.

So the sun came up and Colt drove Ellie back to her father’s home, but not before adding his new number to her phone. She packed up her suitcase and tanked up the Shokai Fourier and made the drive across the country, back to Langston and a world of academics and being a “good girl.” But now she had another outlet. Anytime she craved that thrill, she would text him. Sometimes it was a bratty little insult. Sometimes it was a barely clothed selfie. But he always responded. And as she started sophomore year, it felt like she might be figuring out a way to merge the two sides of her life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Texting Colt became a new form of an adrenaline rush when she somehow stumbled into a relationship with Chris. She knew it was wrong, that Chris didn’t deserve the way she was treating him. Being kind of dull was not failing. But the problem was that “Langston Ellie” didn’t have a reason not to date him. So over Valentine’s dinner, he became her boyfriend.

It was a balance, that thrill that came from sneaking out for a drive or shooting Colt a dirty little text versus the pit of guilt that sat in her stomach. She tried to justify it to herself when the guilt got to be too much, telling herself that nothing physical had happened with Colt while she and Chris were together, but that was a flimsy excuse.

The issue was that she felt like herself, vibrant and happy, and the more she pushed the boundaries on what was acceptable in her personal life, the more she excelled elsewhere. She was setting the curve in almost all her classes. Her research was going well enough to get approved for the Summer Scholars Program, which came with a generous stipend. It’s like she had to be doing something “wrong” to feel complete, and since stealing cars wasn’t an option at the moment, this is what she settled for. She wasn’t sure what that said about her as a person.

But she kept living her double life for months and months until one day in October, things all came to a head. She got a call from a number with a 310 area code, but she didn’t recognize it, so she let it go to voicemail. When she finally got a chance to listen to it an hour later, after her meeting with Dr. Frisch, it felt like the world might just swallow her whole. Her father was too young, too healthy to have a heart attack, to need bypass surgery, to be in the ICU.

It had taken her 15 hours to email her advisor, request a leave of absence, and receive approval, email Dr. Frisch to withdraw from his research group, and to pack up her room in the off-campus apartment she and Rebecca were renting and load up the Shokai Fourier. She spent far too much of that time breaking up with Chris.

It hadn’t even occurred to her to let him know about Dad until he’d texted her after dinner time, asking if she was still on for an ice cream run to Gilly’s. What followed was him coming over, with hours of talking, of him trying to calm her, tell her everything was going to be fine. She’d gotten frustrated, asked him how he could possibly know her dad was going to be okay. It was messy and awful, their first and last fight, all culminating with her kicking him out and sending him back to his apartment when he dared to suggest she was too emotional to be making these decisions in the moment.

The drive to LA was a long one, filled with tears and regrets. It felt like her fault. She’d put him through hell senior year, only to leave him all alone to flit off to college, where she had just coasted by, chasing down the high of adrenaline in destructive ways. Instead of stopping at a motel to rest, she drove the 3000 miles basically straight through, resting for a few hours in a parking lot in Iowa, but otherwise relying on Red Bull and coffee to get her through the drive. She’d gone to drop off her stuff at her father’s place, but when she arrived, she couldn’t bring herself to unlock the door. Even though the latest update from Dr. Ginde had been that her father was improving, she couldn’t bear to go inside, to see memories of him and her mother plastered everywhere, all by herself.

So she’d driven over to Gramercy Park. The shop was open now. She knew that was the plan, but it was still nice to see it with her own two eyes. She locked her car and went inside, taking in the bustle and the activity, cars hoisted on jacks, an air compressor hissing in the background. If she had recognized any of the people working in the shop, she almost could have believed that no time had passed.

Some guy with dreads went to go find Colt for her as she stood there, feeling both out of place and at home at the same time. Finally, he emerged, grease streaks on his t-shirt and jeans, his hair just a little shorter than she remembered. He took her into his office and listened as she told him what happened. No questions, no platitudes, no infantilization. Just understanding and comfort, and when she told him she didn’t know how to go home alone, he’d just told her to follow him back to his place.

Staying with Colt was like falling back into a former life. She hung around the garage, reconnected with Ximena, and went out racing and to sideshows. She visited her dad every day in the hospital and then in the rehab facility, taking notes on all his doctor’s instructions and researching new, heart-healthy recipes for them to eat as she got him settled back in at home. And even though she and Colt never talked about it, suddenly they were together, with her toiletries tucked into his medicine cabinet, a second towel hung in the bathroom, and her favorite yogurt stocked in the fridge. It all felt comfortable, and she felt at peace with her life for the first time in a long time. She could get that adrenaline rush she craved so badly as she drag raced through the streets, getting to know Colt’s new crew, and she wasn’t hurting anyone to do so. She felt happy, so as October bled into November, she emailed her advisor, preparing to extend her leave of absence.

She never thought Colt would object to her plans to stick around, but he was cruel and livid when she told him she wasn’t heading back. At first, her anger flared, righteous and indignant. How dare he try to tell her what to do. She’d thrown her clothes that were scattered around his place back into her duffel bag and headed straight to her father’s home. He didn’t comment when she tossed her bag into her old bedroom, just pulled out the Parcheesi board and sat down at his usual spot at the kitchen table.

The next morning, she awoke to the smell of bacon sizzling, so she made her way into the kitchen.

“Dad, you can’t have bacon anymore. It’s not on your ‘safe foods’ list.”

“I figured whatever sent you here yesterday might warrant an ‘Ellie special,’” he said with a shrug. “Besides, it’s turkey bacon.”

She bit her lip as she sat down at the table, wondering if she should risk stressing him out by bringing it up, but he crossed the bridge first as he set her plate in front of her.

“I suppose you were staying with that boy with the yellow GT?”

She shook her head. “No, the boy with the motorcycle.”

Dad just let out a sigh and gave his head a little shake. “They’re all still wanted criminals, Ellie. The statute of limitations hasn’t run out. But I suppose you already know that.”

“Dad…”

“Look, I know you’re an adult, and you can make your own choices. But I hope you know what you’re doing here. If you get caught up with him in something again… I won’t be able to spin it that you were just a kid who got roped into the whole thing by a dirty cop who convinced you that you could be an informant and help him.”

“I know what I’m doing, Dad. I’m not stupid.”

“I know you aren’t. That’s what scares me the most. Oh well, you’ll be back at Langston soon enough, I suppose.”

It was Ellie’s turn to sigh as she filled him in on how her plan had been to stay, to work in LA and to help him recover, at least for one more semester. When she finished, Dad just stared at her for a few seconds, eyes narrowed, before he spoke.

“So, let me see if I have this right. This… Colt told you to go back and finish your degree?” As she nodded, he just shook his head. “Never thought I would be on the same side as a little punk.”

She shoved her chair back from the table, abandoning her breakfast. “Dad, it doesn’t matter whose side you’re on, because it doesn’t matter what you think or what he thinks. This is my choice.”

But as the days ticked by, and her dad seemed stronger and stronger, she had to wonder if she was doing the right thing. She’d gotten upset because it felt like Colt was trying to decide what was best for her, but as she thought back on their fight with a clearer head, that wasn’t really a fair assessment. He wasn’t trying to control her; he was trying to push her. At the end of the day, he liked her strong and sharp, ready for the next challenge. And while being back in LA felt good and right in so many ways, just hanging around after her father’s medical emergency wasn’t the way to go about it. She wanted to come back here, but she needed to do so the right way, as an active choice, not a passive situation that just happened.

So she went back to school and worked her ass off, taking summer classes to make up for the shitty schedule with not enough engineering credits she had to settle for after she registered late for classes. She was a semester behind now, but that was manageable. She lost her research position, but that was okay. She didn’t need to build her resume anymore. She had a job lined up already.

When she signed papers granting her 50% ownership of Kaneko Auto Shop, everyone in her life thought she was crazy. Rebecca had pestered her for months with info about engineering firms that were hiring and master’s programs. Riya had told off Darius for telling her she was being foolish, but as soon as he left to go get them takeout, she’d told her she must be out of her mind to legally tie herself to that Kaneko boy in any way. Her father just shook his head and went into his bedroom, closing the door with a thud. But Ellie didn’t care. It was the first time she’d felt fully alive in almost five years.

It was invigorating, to finally be living a life that was 100% her choosing. She wasn’t held back by her father’s restrictions, her peers’ perceptions, her own perfectionistic expectations of herself. She was just… Ellie. She wasn’t bound by anything or anyone. All her fears, concerns, and worries were nothing in the face of all the possibilities ahead of her. Ahead of them.

Colt had always seen her. It was why she’d been drawn to him in the first place. He didn’t treat her like a child that needed protecting. He respected her agency, her autonomy, her abilities. He respected her opinions and suggestions, and slowly but surely, they were able to expand and grow the shop and their territory. Not too fast, as that would attract the attention of both rivals and law enforcement, but steady enough that people had to take them both seriously. He wasn’t just coasting on his father’s reputation, and she wasn’t some sheltered little girl who had slept her way into this world. They proved themselves, and they were thriving. And finally, Ellie felt like she was living the life she was supposed to be. She felt like herself, fully realized and alive.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s not that she and Colt lived in some bubble of pure domestic and professional bliss. They disagreed about how aggressive to be when rival crews inched in on their turf, about whether a drop would be worth the payout, about whether or not the new mechanic was trustworthy enough to drive on their next big job. And when they disagreed, they disagreed. It was never violent, but it was loud and passionate. They pushed each other time and time again. It was just how they worked things out, and they always were able to come to an understanding in the end.

Ellie never questioned their arrangement until she was pregnant. In their four years as equal partners, both personally and professionally, she’d never had any qualms about the life they were living. It was exciting and thrilling, but their risks were always calculated, or so it had seemed. They were smart about things. It’s why their territory had nearly doubled in size over those four years with only one misdemeanor arrest for petty theft for their entire crew over that time.

But when she heard that heartbeat over the sonogram, Ellie knew that she had to change the way she thought about risk and reward, because risks that were acceptable to take when it was just her and Colt, conquering south LA one block at a time, where not okay when there was going to be a child at home depending on them. Colt, on the other hand, seemed to take the opposite approach. He was hungrier and more ambitious than ever. He wanted to move more volume, expand to new neighborhoods, to grow bigger more quickly than ever.

“This will be our legacy. All of this, rebuilt and passed on to our kid,” he told her over and over again. And any of her pleas to slow things down, to take a step back, were met with annoyance and frustration. “If we slow down, we won’t be able to keep what we have now. Others will take notice and swoop in. It’ll be a moment of weakness.”

He worked nearly around the clock, always trying to strike a better deal, to find a better score. Part of her had even worried that he would have left her at the hospital with just her father if he got word of a deal on hot merchandise while she was in labor. But when the contractions came, he was at her side the entire time. He was antsy and impatient, sure, but most of that was probably due to having to spend 26 hours straight in a confined space with Dad. Over the years, that relationship had never evolved beyond frosty tolerance.

When Margot Graciela Kaneko came into the world, 6 lbs 4 oz and screaming like a banshee, Ellie swore she saw Colt wipe a tear away. She hadn’t seen him cry since that awful night in May nine years ago, when he’d had to watch his father sacrifice himself. When she forgot all about how horrible it was that Colt had kidnapped and planned murders because he’d looked so broken and human, not at all like a ruthless kingpin wannabe who had no moral code. With all their shared daddy issues, it had felt cruel to bring up her concerns about his moral compass when his world had just shattered to pieces.

For his part, Dad cried openly when she told him his granddaughter’s name, forgiving the use of Kaneko as her surname when he realized she shared her middle name with the abuela she would never get to meet. For a moment, they felt like a normal family. Not a detective father who had to turn a blind eye as his daughter and her boyfriend ran one of the ten largest auto theft crews in LA. Just three adults who loved a little baby girl more than anything.

Colt was always a loving father. He adored Margot, and she wanted for nothing. Toys and clothes and books littered her nursery in their new two bedroom house, a home security system installed with door and window alarms, motion sensors, and security cameras. He took pride in every developmental milestone she reached and bragged about her constantly. The office at the shop was covered with her drawings, and when she started 4K, her first attempts at writing letters and numbers joined her colorings and paintings.

He just didn’t seem to have any desire to strike a work-life balance. It didn’t exactly surprise Ellie. They had both thrown themselves into that shop for years, their only goal and purpose. For both of them, work had been their life. But now, she felt like they needed to handle things a little differently. More cautious, less aggressive in their growth schemes. It was a point of disagreement between them regularly.

“I don’t understand what your problem is, Ellie. I’m building this for us. For her. Since when are you fucking timid about growing the shop?”

“It would be nice if you could eat dinner at home with us more than a couple of times a month.”

“Just bring her for dinner with the crew.”

Round and round, over and over. Her asking him to take a step back and spend more time with Margot while he dove deeper and deeper into his work, acting like bringing Margot into that world as a preschooler was a solution. At times it felt like her own personal Groundhog’s Day, her living the same day with the same damn fight time and time again.

She’d been venting to Mona one afternoon in a coffee shop as she waited for a contact to bring them info about a new shipment that should be passing through over the weekend. It was a little risky, combining her work with a meeting with Mona now that she worked as a consultant on grand larceny cases for the LAPD. Initially it had been a condition of her parole, but it ended up suiting Mona just fine. She was a free-lancer at this point, so she only took the cases that she wanted, and she was well paid for it. Not as well-paid as Colt and Ellie, but without the overhead and without the risk.

“He just is so single-minded, and he doesn’t understand why it bothers me.”

Mona laughed at that. “He’s Kaneko’s kid, Ellie. I don’t know what else you were expecting when you picked him over Logan.”

It was strange to think about it like that. She knew that Logan and Colt had both wanted her back then. And for a while, she and Logan were happy. But while Logan had tried to shield her from his world, Colt had encouraged her to immerse herself further. He saw potential in her, and it had been so liberating, being seen as a woman, not a child. And once it came out that Logan had only pursued her at Kaneko’s instruction, she’d just been done. She felt like a pawn and a fool, hurt and violated, so she’d turned to the only person she could count on to be blunt and direct, to respect enough at least for that.

“Have you heard from Logan at all?”

Mona shook her head. “I think he made it to Detroit, but that was years ago.”

“I hope he’s doing okay,” Ellie said as she took a sip of her coffee. Mona just raised an eyebrow, but didn’t push that topic any further. She was right. The traits that drew her to Colt in the first place were wrapped tightly with the ones that frustrated her now, all of which were proof that he was very much his father’s son.

“So other than Colt being an ass, how’s life?” Mona asked, drawing Ellie out of her nostalgic musings. She pulled out her phone and showed her a video of Margot cruising around on her new balance bike. For better or worse, this was the life she had chosen, and for all its frustrations, she knew she still had plenty to appreciate. She wouldn’t have wanted a different life, anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Margot was heavy in her arms as she rang the doorbell, praying that he wasn’t working tonight. He really wasn’t supposed to be working nights at all anymore - his cardiologist’s recommendation as part of numerous lifestyle changes - but Ellie knew he would still pick up an overnight now and then. She’d never really felt like she was in a position to question his judgement given her own career choices.

She rang the bell three times before she saw a light flip on the hallway. She let out a sigh of relief. She hadn’t wanted to have to pick the lock. A few seconds later, the door cracked open. Her father looked disoriented, his hair sticking out in numerous directions, wearing blue plaid pajama pants and an old Honor Roll Parent t-shirt.

“Ellie? What’s going-” he started, but dropped his voice to a whisper when he noticed Margot passed out against her shoulder. “Are you okay?”

Ellie nodded. “We just need a place to stay.”

He opened his mouth, clearly wanting to say more, but after a second, he just nodded and stepped aside, letting them pass through the door. He followed a few steps behind. Ellie could feel him staring at her as she carried her daughter into her old bedroom, tucking her in on the far side of the bed.

“I need to go grab our stuff from my car. Can you stay with her? She’s going to be confused if she wakes up and isn’t in her bed.”

Dad just nodded again, sitting down on the edge of the bed and running his hand soothingly over the back of his granddaughter’s head. When Ellie returned with the duffel bag and tote bags she managed to fill, all she knew she could carry at the same time as Margot, she dropped them on the floor. Anytime she had come to stay before, she’d only brought a couple days worth of clothes, so she knew the amount of luggage she’d brought was going to attract attention. He was a detective, after all.

“How long are you staying?”

All she could do was shake her head, willing herself not to cry. She felt lost and heartbroken, but more than that, she felt stupid. Stupid for ignoring everyone’s warnings about Colt, for thinking that she could have the thrills and excitement of that life without causing serious harm, for having a child with a man who could order the murder of someone without batting an eyelash.

Dad stood up and crossed over to her, wrapping his arms around her, and she couldn’t hold back anymore. She started sobbing into his chest, feeling like a child all over again. But the pain kept pouring out of her, and her father just took it all, even after everything she’d put him through over the past 13 years. And when the tears finally slowed, she let him guide her to her old bed and tuck her in right next to her daughter.

The next week was filled with rounds of Candyland and Guess Who, drives out for ice cream and donuts, and trips to the park with Abuelo. All things that Margot loved, things that would hopefully keep her happy and from asking questions that Ellie wasn’t ready to answer. How do you tell your four year old that her Daddy, the man she thought was the best on the planet, had decided to make some phone calls to end a man’s life, so they couldn’t live with him anymore? Ellie just wanted to put off that conversation for as long as possible.

But Margot was bright and curious, and all the distraction in the world wasn’t enough to make her forget her home and her father. Ellie stumbled through it the best she could, telling her that Daddy had done something very naughty that he thought was the right choice, but that was actually something really bad.

“Is Daddy in a timeout?” she asked as Ellie tucked her in, her brown eyes wide with wonder.

“Kind of, sweetie.”

“How long do Daddy’s timeouts last?”

“A long time, Margot. A very long time.”

She nodded, like it all made sense to her now. Ellie knew she couldn’t keep her from Colt forever, but until she felt like she had her feet under her again, this was probably the best approach she could hope for. She dropped a kiss to her daughter’s forehead and flipped off the lights, gently closing the door and making her way into the kitchen.

The Mancala board was set up this time. While the days were filled with fun activities for Margot, the nights had been a series of board games, just her and Dad. Just like the old days. He hadn’t asked her many questions. Ellie suspected he was so glad she had left Colt, that he didn’t want to push his luck and say the wrong thing that might send her running back to him. But tonight she was going to have to broach the subject.

“Dad, can you watch Margot tomorrow night?” she asked as she dropped her stones down, one by one, working her way around the board.

“Why? Where are you going?”

“Probably to the shop or our house. I’m going to have to talk to him at some point.”

“He’s… been riding by on that... bike of his,” Dad ground out, glancing up across the table, his eyes flitting nervously. Like she hadn’t known that was the case. She knew exactly what his bike sounded like. Besides, she knew it would be his next step. She had dozens of voicemails and unread texts from him.

“I know.”

“Do you… what I mean is… what do you want me… are you… Ellie-”

“We’re done, Dad. I don’t want to see him.” She interrupted his ramblings, and glanced up from the Mancala board at him. His shoulders visibly relaxed at her words. “But we have a kid together. I can’t just pretend he doesn’t exist.”

He let out a little hum as he contemplated his next move. “Ellie, what happened?”

She shook her head. No way he wouldn’t feel obligated to turn Colt in if he heard that he’d ordered Shaw’s shanking. “I really can’t tell you.”

“If he did something that-”

“-I still own 50% of the shop, Dad. Plus, he’s Margot’s father. This is going to be hard enough on her without him behind bars.”

She could practically feel her father’s stare, attempting to bore a hole in the top of her head as she kept her eyes on the board. She knew he wanted to know more, wanted to say more. Finally, he said, “I know you don’t want to hear this, but if you’re looking at a custody battle, him behind bars would be very helpful.”

She turned her head up and frowned. “I’m not going to throw him to the wolves. It won’t make things better, trust me.”

“Honey, you say that now, but when custody battles get going-”

“He’s not gonna fight me for custody,” Ellie interrupted. “Not as long as I let him see her every now and then.”

“How can you know that?”

“I’m gonna let him buy me out of the shop well below market value. That’s always been his priority, anyway.” She’d been mulling it over in her mind, and it seemed like her best move. They both got what they wanted. As long as she promised not to do what his mother had done, to take his kid and move as far away as possible, he would probably agree. He got his father’s legacy and a relationship with his daughter. She got the chance to shield her daughter from the harshest realities of the world where she was born. It was win-win.

She knew she was screwed professionally at this point. She’d spent the nine years since college in a job that would do little for her resume. It was a small price to pay for her daughter’s safety and well-being, though.

“Hopefully I’ll be able to get enough to get a little apartment for us, at least until I figure out what I can do for work-” she started explaining, but Dad reached across the table and grabbed her hand, cutting her off.

“You’ll both stay here as long as you need.”

“Dad, you’ve already dealt with so much of this drama. I’m not going to ask you to house us indefinitely.”

He shook his head, still holding tight to her hand. “I know you could do it on your own if you had to, Ellie. You are bright and resourceful and so determined when you need to be. But I’m your dad, and this something I can do to help you out and keep you safe.”

Tears welled in her eyes at his words. His desire to protect her from a harsh world was still there all those years later. And while it had been the bane of her existence as a teenager who thought she could handle everything that life would throw her way, his attitude felt different now that she had Margot sleeping in her childhood bed, a direct result of her own attempt to protect her child.

“Thank you, Dad,” she choked out, forcing a smile as a couple of tears spilled over onto her cheeks.

“Of course, Honey. You’re both my girls, always.”

He was right, more right than he could know. Because if Colt was cut from the same cloth as his father, well, so was she, at least where it counted. She would protect her daughter and as a family, they would get through the bad times. She hadn’t always made the right choices, but she had her daughter and she had her father. And for the time being, that would have to be enough.

Permatag: @choicesficwriterscreations @walkerswhiskeygirl @riley--walker @bebepac @ravenpuff02 @oofchoices @octobereighth @drakewalker04 @kimmiedoo5 @mfackenthal @thequeenofcronuts

ROD: @mskaneko @burnsoslow

#rodaw #colt kaneko #colt x mc #rod fanfic #choices fanfiction #n*fw #cw: infidelity

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snowdice · 4 years ago

Text

Folds in Paper (Chapter 7: Not Much Has Changed but They Lived Underwater)[Folds in Time Universe]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Janus/Patton, Remus & Roman, eventual Logan/Virgil (maybe more)

Characters:

Main: Janus, Patton, Remus

Appear: Remy, Emile, Virgil, Logan, Roman

Summary: Janus, a disillusioned senior agent working for the Time Preservation Initiative, struggles to find meaning in a world where time travel could change everything about your life’s history in less than a moment. When time distortions start popping up, threatening the timeline and the fabric of reality as he knows it, it becomes a race against the clock to fix the damage before everything unravels. And the problem with time travel… you never how long you have before the clock strikes 12 and your time is up.

With a partner who has more mysteries in his past than Janus had anticipated and an enigmatic free agent time traveler mucking about time always with a clever pun or a time appropriate pet name on his lips, Janus will need to figure out what went wrong with time, and more importantly, how to fix it.

Chapter Summary:

Stood there with my neighbor called Peter

And a flux capacitor

He told me he built a time machine

Like one in a film I've seen, yeah

He said

“I've been to the year 3000

Not much has changed, but they lived underwater

And your great-great-great-granddaughter

Is doing fine

Doing fine"

-”Year 3000″ by the Jonas Brothers

(Can you spot all of the horrible, horrible puns and references??)

Notes: Time travel AU, mystery, enemies to lovers, alcohol

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

I also have a playlist on youtube (because Spotify didn’t have one of the songs I wanted).

AO3 Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

“Him,” was the only thing Janus said before taking off after the figure who had just disappeared into the games area.

“What?” Remus’s voice followed after him. “Janus! What?!”

Janus did not pause, continuing to run after Pat and bounding over two barricades as a shortcut to the protest of some of the workers. Janus cursed when he lost sight of the man for just a moment near the prize table filled with colorful goldfish, but he was able to spot him once again walking into one of the game tents. Janus blasted into the tent after him.

The game taking place in the tent was apparently one where they raced rats, and when Janus entered, Pat was cooing at one of said rats. “Who’s a tiny little squishy precious baby?” he was asking while wiggling his pointer finger at it.

“You,” Janus growled stepping up to him.

Pat turned and tilted his head at Janus with a frown. “Um, me?” he asked, pointing to his chest, all sorts of innocent, but Janus could see a spot of hidden amusement in his eyes.

“Where is it?”

His eyebrows drew together, but it was an act. It was clearly an act! “Where is what?”

“The…” he glanced around at the people surrounding them. They were already getting odd looks. “Thing you just took.”

“I didn’t take anything,” Pat said with a frown.

“Oh, no,” Janus said. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fooling me twice is not an option.”

“I’m sorry sir,” Pat said. “I really don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Bull. Shit.”

Just then, the colorful blob of paint that was Remus jogged into the tent. “What’s going on?” he asked.

“It’s him,” Janus said pointing. “He took it. He has it.”

“I… don’t know what you’re talking about,” Pat said. He looked over to Remus with a confused frown.

Remus looked at Janus. “Are you sure?”

“Yes,” Janus said. “It’s him. It has to be him. He’s the mask guy.”

Remus squinted at Pat. “He is?”

“Whoever you think I am, I’m not. I haven’t worn a mask all night. I just did the face paint,” he pointed to his cheeks.

Remus raised his wrist and his timepiece lit up green. He looked at Janus.

“I lost sight of him for five seconds. He must have stashed it somewhere,” Janus said. He turned on Pat. “Where did you put it?”

“…Are you,” Pat asked, his eyes going back and forth between Janus and Remus, “… the police?”

“We are, actually,” Khalid said as she stepped into the tent. Remus must have called her. She inserted herself between Janus and Pat. “Agent Khalid,” she said, offering a hand with a smile. Pat looked at it in surprise and then smiled back hesitantly as he took it. “Apologizes, one of the big game prizes was stolen by someone matching your description. Would you mind coming down to security for questioning? Just to clear it up.”

“Oh,” Pat said, hesitant. Janus expected him to refuse outright, but then he said. “Uh, sure.”

“Thank you very much, Mr…”

“Jonas,” Pat told her earnestly. “Do I need to be handcuffed?”

“No,” Khalid said. Janus frowned at her, but she ignored him. “It’s just a talk for now.” She gestured to the tent entrance. “Come with us.”

He did without argument, and Remus and Janus followed behind the both of them. Khalid did not lead them back to the base, but to a little spot that said “security” near the center of the event. Remy was already there waiting for them at a desk.

“Remy, would you please take Mr. Jonas to go sit down?” she asked.

“Sure, boss,” Remy said, standing up. He led Pat away.

Khalid turned to Janus and Remus once they were out of earshot. “What is going on?”

“It’s the mask man,” Janus said, “the one from 1923, and my scanner said the time bomb was on the Millenia Bird outside the games entrance, but then it was gone the next second, and I saw him, and then he ran away.”

“So, does he have it on him?”

“No. I lost sight of him, and he must have stored it somewhere, but I know he took it.”

“He’s the man from 1923?” she asked.

“Yes! Remus, that’s him, right? You recognize him.”

“Well,” Remus said thoughtfully. “He was in a mask, and it was dark in the room with the necklace. Other than that, I only really saw his back, and he was wearing pants. Mr. Jonas is wearing a dress, so I can’t really tell if their asses match.”

“Okay, but I was with him for hours. I swear it’s him, and I swear he took it,” Janus just about shouted.

“We’ll question him,” Khalid placated, “and Fred and Lena will keep looking in the meantime.”

“He knows where it is,” Janus insisted. “I swear.”

“Okay,” Khalid said, before leaving to follow where Remy and Pat had gone. She stopped Janus with a hand on his shoulder. “I think Remus and I will do the interrogation.” He opened his mouth to argue. “You know the most about him, so observe from the sidelines and see if he makes any mistakes that indicate you’re right.”

“That’s just to placate me and you know it.”

“Observation’s over there,” she said pointing.

He got a thumbs up from Remus as he walked by, and Janus glared at his back before walking off to the indicated location. He watched as Remus and Khalid entered the room, and Remy left it. Remy joined him in the observation room after leaving and leaned against the wall.

Pat was sitting at a table and watched Remus and Khalid with that same rubbish placid confusion that he had before. “So,” Khalid said, “Mr. Jonas.”

“You can call me Nick,” Pat interrupted.

“Lia,” Khalid replied. He smiled at her happily. “So, are you enjoying your day?” she asked.

“I am!” he replied. “It’s a big day. You only get to see the turn of a millennia once in your life, and so much as changed in the last 1,000 years. I’m a bit disappointed we can’t live under water yet though.”

“Ah, yes,” Khalid said. “Doing anything special for it?”

“Um, not really,” he said. “other than the city block party. I’m going to meet up with my roommates after dinner. Kevin doesn’t like this sort of thing, and Joe couldn’t come.”

“Your roommates,” Khalid said, considering him. “Do you live around here?”

“Uh huh,” Pat replied.

“Do you have any ID?”

“I do, want me to get it?”

“If you wouldn’t mind.”

Pat unzipped one of the bubbles on his waist and handed her a chip. “Clockson, would you mind going out and getting the ID scanner?” she asked, even though her timepiece would be able to read it.

“Ah, shit,” Remy said. “Props. What do those things even look like?” As Remy scrambled to find something that would pass for an ID reader so ‘Nick’ didn’t get suspicious of Khalid using her timepiece, Janus watched the two alone in the room like a hawk.

“I see you’re wearing a dress inspired by the 2770s,” Khalid noted, as Remus came to stand next to him.

“Yeah!” Pat replied. “Joe made it for me. He’s really good at fashion design!”

“Can I see?” she asked.

With a happy smile, he reached over the table to let her get a look of the sleeves. Janus saw her subtly scan the fabric, probably to make sure it was from the 2990s and not actually from the 2770s. Considering she didn’t mention it, Janus assumed it checked out.

Remy came back with some sort of device then and handed it to Remus who saluted and wandered back into the interrogation room. Khalid pretended to scan the ID in her hand. She handed it back to him without comment. “So, you said you live with your roommates: Joe and Kevin?” she asked.

“Yep!” he replied. “We’re practically like brothers.”

“Would you mind calling them?”

“Erm,” he titled his head like he was confused by the question. “Well, like I said, Joe is a bit busy, but I could definitely call Kevin.

“Here,” Khalid said, “use my phone.”

“I have my own,” he said with a frown. He took out a phone which checked out as being from 2998.

“Humor me,” she requested shoving her own phone at him.

“Uh, okay,” Pat agreed. He took the offered 2999 phone and dialed a number on it. Khalid reached over to put it on speaker.

“Hello?” a voice asked after a few seconds.

“Um, hey Kevin, it’s Nick.”

There was a sigh on the other end. “Hello Nick, is something wrong? Why are you calling me from someone else’s phone?”

“I’m fine, I think.” He looked up at Khalid. “Why am I calling him exactly?”

“Hello, I’m Officer Khalid,” Khalid said. “I just wanted to confirm that you are Nick Jonas’s roommate, and he does live in Manaus.”

“Yes, we live together with our other roommate,” the man replied flippantly. “Officer? Is something wrong?”

“I believe there was just a case of mistaken identity,” Khalid said.

“Bullshit there was!” Janus hissed, though she could not hear him.

“No need to worry,” Khalid continued.

“I’m good Kevin,” Pat said.

“Are you absolutely sure?” Kevin asked.

“Don’t be Paranoid, Kevin. I’ll see you Tonight for the New Years Celebration. You know I Live to Party.”

“I am hanging up now,” Kevin said.

“No! Comeback.” The line went dead. Pat handed the device back to Khalid.

She took it and smiled at him. “Give us just a couple of minutes,” she requested. He nodded easily, and she and Remus exited the interrogation room. “I… think we’re done here,” Khalid said.

“No, he’s lying,” Janus insisted, and got a dubious look in return. “I know he is! Remus!”

“The alibi is pretty solid…” Remus said, “and he doesn’t have the bomb on him.”

“Oh, come on,” Janus said. “You can’t say there is nothing fishy going on here.”

Khalid and Remus shared a look. “Janus,” Khalid said. “I respect your intuition. It is usually very good, but you have been a bit intense about the man from the 1920s, and I think that may be blinding you a bit...”

“I am not imagining this!” Janus said. “That’s him and he took it.”

“You only met him once while he was wearing a mask,” Khalid pointed out with a frown, “and you didn’t see him take the bomb, did you?”

“No, but he looked at me and I knew,” Janus argued. They both gave him a skeptical look. “Oh, come on!”

“You know that’s a little weak, Jan,” Remus said.

“Let me talk to him,” Janus requested. “Just give me five minutes to talk with him.”

Khalid raised one eyebrow. “Fine,” she agreed. “You have five minutes, but after that, you have to let it go. We can’t waste any more time.”

Want to read more? Click below!

AO3 Part 8 Part 9

#sanders sides #janus sanders #patton sanders #remus sanders #moceit #logan sanders #folds in paper #folds in time universe #adriana writes #virgil sanders #analogical #time travel #bomb mentioned #roman sanders #creativitwins

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thefools-journey · 5 years ago

Text

To the Developers of The Arcana Game:

Warning, this isn’t going to be very nice. I will keep the swearing and personal attacks off this post but this is not going to be nice. Sorry, not sorry. I am a Portia fan first, a Devorak fan second, and ‘good storytelling’ fan all around. And I am not happy.

It has come to my attention that the lead writer of Portia’s route has released a tweet begging people to play her route, saying that it isn’t breaking even and that its completion is being threaten due to low fan interest.

Good.

It pains me as a Portia fan to say that but it is exactly how I feel. Good. I hope it doesn’t get finished, if what we have gotten the last two books is indicative of the final product.

Also, how dare you.

How. Dare. You.

I don’t even know where to begin at this point. Let’s start with this letter. You, Arcana devs, you are the reason that Portia’s route is failing, not the fans. Before the secondaries started, Portia was just as popular and just as anticipated as the boys, if not more so. You were the ones who squandered that enthusiasm. It has been obvious for books now that her route is generating less attention. That’s months and months of real time feedback. Yes, not all routes are going to appeal to all people. But. You saw she was struggling and rather than put a tenth of the attention, effort, and advertising into her that you put into Lucio or Muriel, you let the situation continue. You had options for dealing with the situation. Remember how you ignored her recent birthday? Remember how you just delayed her book in favor of Lucio’s without explanation? Remember how many posts on your twitter and BtS stuff go to Muriel and Lucio, not her? Remember how her brother is one of the most popular characters period and how you didn’t use that to her route’s advantage, either in advertising or story line? Remember how you decided to create all these extra backgrounds and new sprites when you knew she was struggling to “bring in revenue” and that she “wasn’t breaking even”?

No, wait, I take that back.

Instead of letting the situation continue, you actively sabotaged her route for the few fans who were reading and enjoying it. Remember what you guys did with the Death book? Remember that big huge twist you spoiled in random newspaper clippings less than two days before you released the book? Remember that? Let me tell you, I still do. I remember being insulted that this route, alone of all the others, was spoiled so heavily in a bid for attention. The last two books in particular have been a mess.

No, seriously, let’s talk about them. It’s very, very clear from the decline in writing quality, which went from a very thoughtful, tightly focused story on Portia and the mundane, common folk of Vesuvia to an LSD trip less coherent than Alice in Wonderland, that major portions of her story were changed or just dropped in a bid for fan attention. Don’t believe me? I have an entire 3000 word meta-analysis on Portia’s route, character, and themes up through Book 13 over here. You’re welcome.

The most obvious and egregious example of changes forced into the route for attention is the masquerade dress introduced in Book 14. Why in the Star’s name would you add that dress in that manner in that context? Why would Portia, of all people, care about a pretty dress when the palace just got blown up and her brother was still missing? Why would Nadia care about said dress when her entire family has vanished? Why is Portia actively changing into a dress she acknowledges in text is beautiful and bulky and not made for running around in when she’s going to be running around the city? And to top it all off, if you had to have her in the dress, why in the High Priestess’ realm would you not give it to her after her bath scene where it makes sense? No, seriously, think about it. Portia wearing her new fancy dress to her aunt’s pre-masquerade party makes sense, not finding it on the cottage stoop. It’s a nice contrast and parallel to the outfit she was wearing for Tasya’s bribery dinner. Portia not changing out of the dress makes more sense than Portia changing into the dress.

That is only one example. I can pick out any number of out of character moments or pacing issues from this last book especially, and oh boy I will have a huge post on that, but here, have a few little things I noticed. Why was the cliffhanger from 14 not resolved at the beginning of 15? Why did we waste a quarter of the book finding Muriel for no reason? No, seriously, I love Muriel but he has no bearing on Portia’s story, much like Portia barely features in his or Lucio’s books. Why did Lucio reappear off screen? Why did Asra’s characterization and reactions flip flop from line to line? One moment he’s worried about Muriel, the next he wants to chase butterflies? What? Why was there no sense of urgency to anything the characters did or said since Temperance started?

Also, perhaps most importantly, Book 15 is The Devil. Where was the Devil? Where? Where was Tasya? This is the rising action to the climax, writers. You know better than this. Everyone knows you know better and are better than this. We know you know better than this because Muriel’s route has a very similar scenario with damage to the palace and caring for refugees and it does miles better than Portia’s. We know you know better because this decline in quality has only appeared here, in the least popular route’s desperate search for attention, and has largely remained out of the more popular routes.

Here’s the gist of the situation, Arcana devs.

Once upon a time, not too long ago, I defended Portia’s route and explained how wonderful it was. I was so invested in her and where her story was headed. I defended it against complaints that it was boring or too similar to the primary routes or that nothing was happening in it. I didn’t care about the other routes because I was getting everything I ever wanted out of the game from her route alone. I even held off writing about my disappointments with Book 14 just in case that was a one time bump in the road. It was not. So now I speak.

I am glad that your mad scramble changes failed to generate any new interest in her story line.

I’m glad because you stripped all the character arcs, themes, and meanings from the first half in exchange for fan service and attention in a last ditch gamble which thus far has failed.

I’m glad because now, maybe, you’ll look at this situation and realize exactly where you went wrong.

After all, the Star is a card of clarity and truth.

-Mod Telos

#the arcana game #portia #portia update #portia spoilers #the arcana update #dear devs #this is bull #how dare #The Wheel Turns #more like the wheel's gonna grind you up #portia devorak #arcana game #arcana meta #the arcana meta #portia meta

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tonystarkbingo · 4 years ago

Photo

TSB MIV Week 8 Roundup!

Go give our wonderful participants some love.

Title: For this, I am Thankful Collaborator: corsets_and_cardigans Card Number: 4061 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - free space Ship: Stony Rating: Teen Major Tags: Past Pepper/Tony, Peter is Tony’s Bio Son Summary: Newly divorced Dad Tony spends Thanksgiving with his attractive new neighbor. Word Count: 4299

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Title: Iron Tsum Collaborator: deehellcat Card Number: 4028 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: S2 - mad science Ship: none Rating: Gen Major Tags: none Summary: During a battle with a power-hungry scientist, Tony got zapped by some handwavy energy beam and turned into a tsum tsum. This explains his very angry face. lol

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Title: Part of Your World Collaborator: iam93percentstardust Card Number: 4012 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R3 - Teenage Tony Ship: WinterIron Rating: Teen Major Tags: Mermaid AU, Tony Needs a Hug, Howard Stark’s A+ Parenting Summary: Tony grows up without a pod. Howard doesn’t believe in pods, after all, even though nearly every other killer whale-mer out there has one. But the Stark patriarch is convinced that he’s too good to need a pod, too special, too skilled a hunter. Pods are for weaklings who can’t hunt for themselves, not for the likes of Howard Stark. Uncharitably, Tony thinks that maybe a pod might have saved Howard from the kraken. Word Count: 965

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Title: Gossamer Collaborator: RoseRose Card Number: 4022 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - free space Ship: Stuckony Rating: Explicit Major Tags: PWP, crossdressing, humiliation, boot worship, BDSM Summary: Tony is indulging himself in a kink he hadn't told his partners yet when they arrive home unexpectedly. Fun is had by all. Crossdressing and humiliation kink, with accompanying boot worship. Word Count: 1379

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Title: Et tu, Phil? Collaborator: RoseRose Card Number: 4022 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A4 - Good Guys Gone Bad Ship: implied Stucky Rating: Teen Major Tags: Hurt no comfort, betrayal, HYDRA Phil Coulson, mentioned brainwashing, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes Summary: SHIELD, including Phil Coulson is Hydra. Steve has been betrayed. The only upside is that he found Bucky. Scene from a world where Phil Coulson is HYDRA. No happy endings here. Word Count: 926

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Title: Project A.R.I. Collaborator: Juulna Card Number: 4065 Link: AO3 Square Filled: S4 - Stuckony Ship: Stuckony Rating: Not Rated Major Tags: Female Tony Stark, Established Relationship, Wow since when do I write that?, Post-Endgame, Alternate Canon, Parent Tony Stark, Bots as Children, Surprises, It’s hard to surprise supersoldiers, Arecibo Observatory & Telescope, Toni adopts Arecibo because of course she does, Inspired by Real Events, RIP Arecibo, Not Beta Read, Scientific Mistakes Likely Abound Summary: When Toni heard that Arecibo---one of her favourite scientific objects in the world---was going to be decommissioned, well she couldn't have that, now could she?? She tries to surprise her husbands, but instead ends up being the one pleasantly surprised---and very much loved. Word Count: 259

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Title: ’Tis the wind and nothing more! Collaborator: Faustess Card Number: 4059 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R4 - Supernatural (moodboard) Ship: Tony & Rhodey Rating: Teen Major Tags: Supernatural, Poltergeists, Fear, Haunted Houses, Protective James "Rhodey" Rhodes, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark at MIT Summary: Some older students lure Tony to a house that's reputedly haunted... then lock him in. Word Count: 100

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Title: I Went to the County Fair and All I Got Was This Alpaca Collaborators: newnewyorker93 & rebelmeg Card Numbers: 4042 & 4034 Link: AO3 Square Filled: newnewyorker93, T1 - Animal rebelmeg, S5 - Animal Ship: Pepperony Rating: Gen Major Tags: depression, Pepper cares, accidental alpaca acquisition Summary: Pepper has been doing her best to help Tony manage his depression after the Snap. A surprise encounter at the county fair gives her an idea for one more thing she can try... Word Count: 2530

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Title: Tony Stark/Iron Man Collaborator: needyoucap Card Number: 4029 Link: Tumblr Square Filled: A3 - Free Space Ship: none Rating: Gen Major Tags: ornament Summary: Tony Stark and Iron Man gingerbread ornaments

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Title: Chibi Iron Man Collaborator: rebelmeg Card Number: 4034 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R4 - “I Love You 3000″ Ship: None Rating: Gen Major Tags: Cross stitch Summary: Cross stitch of a cute chibi Iron Man Word Count: N/A

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Title: [Podfic] Apprentice Collaborator: Juulna Card Number: 4065 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R4 - AU: Sci-fi/Futuristic Ship: None Rating: Teen Major Tags: Companions (Firefly), Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Length: 0-10 Minutes, (10 mins), Tony Stark Bingo Mark IV, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction Summary: "To stay safe from his father, a young Tony Stark is sent away from his homeworld to train as a Companion. He catches the eye of Inara Serra, who grooms him into the man he will become." Based with permission on: Apprentice by @ladydarkphoenix-blog Podfic Length: 10 minutes

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Title: Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend Collaborator: camichats Card Number: 4049 Link: AO3 Square Filled: Chapter 1: S5-Hindsight Chapter 2: A5-Bed Sharing Chapter 3: R4- “Who, me?” Chapter 4: A1-I Love You 3000 Chapter 5: K2-Mirror Image Ship: Wanda Maximoff/Tony Stark Rating: Explicit Major Tags: Sugar Daddy/Baby relationship, Age Difference, Sexual Content Summary: Wanda ends up as Tony Stark's sugar baby to help get her through college. Getting into that relationship was the last thing she expected and falling in love came as a surprise to both of them. Word Count: 14,793

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Title: Call This Bliss Collaborator: iam93percentstardust Card Number: 4012 Link: AO3 Square Filled: R4 - Polyamory or Open Relationship Ship: Stuckony Rating: E Major Tags: Warlord AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Explicit Sexual Content Summary: Steven notices it first: a gradual sweetening of Tony’s scent from something warm and homey to alluring and intoxicating. It takes him a few days to realize what it means. In all the months Tony has been here in Sauoa with them, he’s never once had a heat. This isn’t unusual for omegas. Heats can be affected by anything, ranging from exercise to stress and everything in between. And Tony had certainly been stressed in the first few months after coming to the village. It’s no wonder he hasn’t had a heat before this. Word Count: 4174

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Title: You Want a Battle? Here’s a War Collaborator: deehellcat Card Number: 4028 Link: AO3 Square Filled: K4 - Expats Ship: Pre-WinterIron Rating: Gen Major Tags: Alternate Universe - No Powers, On the Run, Secret Identities, Alternate Universe - Hydra Won (Marvel), pre-Winteriron Summary: Two strangers running from the same threat meet and consider an alliance (on more levels than one). Word Count: 2185

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Title: I die with variety - Chapter 4 Collaborator: simi Card Number: 4066 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A4 - Obadiah Stane/Iron Monger Ship: IronHusbands Rating: Explicit Major Tags: major character death, immortality in a way but it will end at some time, explicit sexual content, deaths in various, graphic circumstances, violence, alcohol poisoning, terminal illness. Summary: The first time that Tony dies, he is four and he’s building his very first circuit board from scratch. He’s connecting the finished product to the multimeter to check the voltage, the current and resistance, when a lead slips, a shock ricochets up through his spine, and he sees black.He’s on his back, when his eyes flutter open, and he’s staring up at the ceiling. He gets up, frowning, rubbing at his eyes, and then, he sees the frayed wire on the end of the multimeter.Huh, he thinks and moves on almost immediately. Word Count: 4026

#tonystarkbingomarkiv #tsbmiv #tsb miv weekly roundup #tsb miv week 8

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phoenix-downer · 5 years ago

Text

Of Which Reason Knows Nothing - Chapter 2

I’m happy to post the second part of the project @chibiranmaruchan and I collaborated on! (You can find the first part here). They drew the art, and I wrote the fic. Working with them was a lot of fun, and I’m really happy with what we’ve created. I will also be posting this story to FFN and AO3 if those are your preferred reading spot(s).

Length: ~3000 words

Summary: Kairi may have lost someone important, but she isn’t alone, and she isn’t without hope. And her mysterious dreams just might have a clue as to Sora’s whereabouts…

Characters: Kairi, Sora, Riku

Additional Info: Implied Kairi/Sora, Riku and Kairi friendship. Post-Kingdom Hearts III. Referenced Character Death. Guilt, Grief/Grieving, Angst, Comfort, Dreams, Friendship.

Enjoy!

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That night, Kairi wore Sora’s hoodie to bed again. Maybe it wasn’t related to her dream at all, but it couldn’t hurt to wear it, just in case there was some sort of connection.

As her eyes flickered shut, she murmured, “Sora, if you’re out there… if you’re trying to reach me… I’m listening.”

Neon lights, flashing colors. An enormous city with skyscrapers pointing towards the moon, trying to reach the heavens but getting pulled back down to earth. Water on the ground in puddles as raindrops splashed into them, disturbing the surface of the water, reflecting the surroundings like a mirror.

She was back. She was back in the same place as before.

White paint on the ground. Lots of lines running across the street. Big billboards running dozens of different ads at the same time. Cars with bright lights, too bright in the dark. The sky a strange shade of purple with ominous black clouds. A big white tower with the numbers 104 in neon red letters.

She glanced at one of the puddles nearby. A face with blue eyes and spiky brown hair stared back. Lifting her hand, she gasped at what she saw. It wasn’t her hand. It was Sora’s, and he was holding a small black pin with a skull-looking emblem on it. He turned it over, and the whole world seemed to go wonky.

“Huh?” He dropped the pin and clutched his head.

“Sora!” she cried, but he couldn’t hear her. His Gummiphone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out.

The message said:

Reach 104. You have 60 minutes. Fail, and face erasure.

—The Reapers.

“Huh?!”

He put his phone back in his pocket. Pain shot up his arm, and he winced and looked at his hand again. Engraved into his palm were black numbers with yellow outlines and a red background.

59:49. 59:48. 59:47. They kept changing, kept… going down. Kept decreasing with each passing second. When he looked at the 104 building again, it said YOU HAVE 7 DAYS in big red letters against a black background.

“Sora!”

But the dream was over, and her eyes flew open. Fingers shaking, she grabbed the Gummiphone on her bedside table. The phone rang and rang and rang as her heart raced because of her dream.

“C’mon, Riku, please, please pick up—”

A few moments later, and he did.

“Kairi?” came his familiar voice, if a little groggy. She glanced at the little time display at the top of the screen. A few minutes after six. The video kicked in, and he yawned as he wiped the sleep out of his eyes.

“Riku, I had another dream about him again,” she said, unable to hide the excitement in her voice.

Riku perked up immediately at that. “You did? What was it about this time?”

“He was in that city I saw before, only this time there was more.” She closed her eyes and pictured it now. The busy crosswalk, the building with 104 written on it, all the colorful lights and sounds. And the red and black numbers carved into his palm. “There was a countdown, on his hand,” she added, trying to include as many details as possible.

“A countdown?” Riku repeated, his voice rising.

Her eyes flew open. “Yes. I’m not sure why, but—”

“Kairi, I think I know where he is. I think I know where he is,” Riku said, and his voice had more energy and hope in it than it had since… well, since everything had happened.

She tugged at Sora’s hoodie and sat up straighter at that. “W-what? But how?”

“When we were taking our Mark of Mastery exam, he met this guy named Neku. He told me later on that Neku talked to him about a game.”

“And?”

“There was a countdown on Neku’s hand that was a part of that game.”

She thought about this for a moment. “So you think he might be playing the same game as Neku?”

Riku nodded. “Yeah. He said Neku was from this place called Shibuya. If we can find that, we can find him.”

This was it, this was their best lead ever since he’d disappeared. She said goodbye to Riku and threw on some clothes. They had to go see Master Yen Sid about this. Their friends all deserved to know.

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Kairi waited with bated breath as Master Yen Sid closed his eyes and stroked his beard. Stealing a quick glance at Riku, she wondered if he was feeling as wound up as she was right now. His face was a calm mask, but then again, he’d never really worn his heart on his sleeve the way she and Sora did.

“So, you are convinced Sora is somewhere called Shibuya, playing some sort of game,” Master Yen Sid said.

Kairi nodded. “Yes, Master. I know it may seem a little crazy—”

“On the contrary, where else would a heart go after fading from the Realm of Light? Sora did not die a normal death, and there are legends of the same thing happening to others.”

“Really?” Riku asked. “Like who?”

Kairi knew what he was thinking. If it had happened to someone else before, there might be clues as to how to save Sora.

“There was a man who called himself the Master of Masters,” Master Yen Sid said. “He had six Keyblade-wielding apprentices, all named after the Seven Deadly Sins. Ava, Luxu, Invi, Gula, Ira, and Aced, with him as their leader: Superbia. Legend has it that instead of dying, he simply faded away, never to be seen or heard from again.”

Kairi and Riku both waited to hear more, but it soon became clear that was all.

“That’s it? That’s all?” Riku said, echoing her thoughts. “This… Master of Masters guy never returned to the Realm of Light?”

“Well, there is more to the story, but it relates to the events of the Keyblade War, and the two of you would be here for days if I were to recount it all to you. I do not think a history lesson is what you want right now. I shared this with you so you would know that the same fate that befell Sora has befallen someone else before, if the legends are to be believed. That was why Mickey tried to warn him against doing what he did, but as the philosophers say, the heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.”

Master Yen Sid smiled sadly, and Kairi’s heart sank. They had warned Sora not to save her and he still did? Why?

“I know it should be him here with Riku instead of me,” she said. “But if there’s anything I can do to—”

“Incorrect. You are exactly the person who should be here with Riku right now,” Master Yen Sid said. “For if Riku is to dive into realms unknown, who better to keep his heart tethered to the Realm of Light than a Princess of Heart?”

“I can do that?” Kairi said.

“You kept Sora tethered to the Realm of Light, did you not?”

“Well, yes, but… that was different, Master. My powers don’t work on other people the way they work on Sora, and I’m not really sure why, though I do have a few guesses.”

Riku raised an eyebrow but thankfully kept his mouth shut.

“As I said earlier: the heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing,” Master Yen Sid said. “But no matter; in keeping Riku tethered to the Realm of Light as he descends to the depths, you will be helping Sora. Surely you can see how your powers could still be used in this manner.”

“I suppose…”

“Have some faith in yourself, Kairi,” Riku said. “You kept Sora alive, and that let him save the rest of us. I know you’ll be able to pull this off.”

Kairi’s hand fluttered to her necklace. “But what if I can’t? What if I screw up again? I already lost Sora because I was too weak to stop myself from dying. I can’t… I can’t lose you too, Riku!”

Riku put his hand on her shoulder. “You can do this, I know you can. You’re not alone. Together we’ll find Sora and bring him back.” His expression softened. “And you know how I know that?”

“How?”

“Sora believes in us. He believed he’d find you when you were lost. He never gave up on me after all the crap I pulled. So let’s believe in ourselves the way he does.”

Riku was right. Even though Kairi had trouble believing in herself, she couldn’t deny that Sora believed in her. And she believed in him. She believed in Riku, too. And maybe that would be enough.

“Okay, I’m willing to try,” she said, and Master Yen Sid and Riku both nodded.

“We must begin preparations at once,” Master Yen Sid said. “There is no time to waste. The sooner we can reach Sora and bring him back to the Realm of Light, the better.”

Finally. They finally had something to do besides sit around at home and grieve. Taking action felt so much better than doing nothing.

As she and Riku made preparations, she couldn’t help but reflect back on those words she’d told Sora and Riku before. This time, she wasn’t just going to protect Sora. This time, she wasn’t just going to fight. This time, she was going to act. She was going to be the one searching for Sora for once instead of the other way around.

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The night before the mission, Kairi dreamed of Sora again. He was still in that same city, but he wasn’t at the big crosswalk anymore. He was on a side street, fighting some strange-looking creatures Kairi had never seen before. They weren’t Heartless or Nobodies, but they did look like large frogs with elaborate red and black tattoos where their legs should’ve been. And even through the dream, Kairi could sense how the atmosphere surrounding them felt. Her skin crawled and her mood dropped, and she could only imagine how Sora felt fighting them.

When he had destroyed the last of them with his Keyblade, he stumbled against a nearby building, a store with bright red letters. His bangs were stuck to his forehead, and he was breathing hard. How long had he been fighting? How many of those things had he already fought?

But what really drew her attention was when he reached into his pocket and pulled out her lucky charm. Her heart soared at the sight of it. He still had it. He still—

“Why can’t I remember you?” he said, and his voice was anguished.

Her heart sank. Sora didn’t… remember her?

Why not? What had happened to him? Were all his memories gone?

“Sora?” she said. “Sora, I’m here!”

But he couldn’t hear her, and he tucked the charm back into his pocket. “Doesn’t matter. Whoever gave this to me has to be someone important to me.” He looked right at her and made a guts pose, even though he couldn’t see her. “Whoever you are, I’m gonna get home to you, some way, somehow.” He smiled, and it was so good to see his smile again. “I promise.”

She opened her mouth to reply, but the dream was over, and her eyes flew open. She rolled over onto her side, still wrapped in Sora’s hoodie, and huddled beneath her blanket as light poured through the window.

Did Sora really not remember her? Her lower lip trembled at the thought. How could he have forgotten her after everything they’d been through? This was like when she’d forgotten him, and a lump built in her throat when she remembered how awful that had been. The memories slowly slipping away from her. The day she’d forgotten his name. The night she’d forgotten his face. The moment she realized she couldn’t hear his voice anymore. All of that came crashing back to her, and her eyes welled up with tears.

But she and Sora had gotten through that, in the end. And his promise did make her feel a little better. Maybe the memories were all scrambled up, but they weren’t gone for good. They had to still be in his heart somehow. The bond they shared couldn’t be broken that easily.

The important thing was that he was fighting to get back to her. So she would fight to reach him, too. Whatever obstacles they might face, she and Riku would bring him home.

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“You ready?” Kairi asked as she held her hands out to Riku. They were back in Master Yen Sid’s study, and everyone else was here too – King Mickey and Donald and Goofy, Terra and Aqua and Ven, Naminé, of course, and Roxas and Xion and Axel. Even Isa was present. Admittedly, that made her feel a little uncomfortable, but at least he had the good sense not to try to talk to her.

“Ready if you are,” Riku said with a half-grin. How he was so relaxed about this, she’d never know. Her hands were shaking a little, but when he grabbed a hold of them, a wave of calm washed over her.

“For Sora?”

“For Sora.”

Her eyes fluttered shut, and she pictured Sora searching for her in Shibuya. Pictured Riku, pictured his heart.

There. She could see his Station of Awakening now with its stained glass-like panels showing the people that were most important to him. Friends and family and memories spread throughout his heart. Taking a deep breath, she reached out with her light, tethering her heart to his. His memories started flowing through her mind, and she opened her eyes.

“Okay, I’m connected to you now. Whenever you’re ready.”

He looked around at their friends. “Hey, why the long faces? Don’t worry about me. I’ll be back here with Sora in no time, you’ll see.” He looked at Kairi one more time and smiled. “We won’t give up on him, because he never gave up on us. And he’s helped every person here in this room at one time or another. Now it’s time we return the favor.”

There was a general chorus of agreement and well-wishing at that. Letting go of one of Kairi’s hands, Riku summoned his Keyblade and opened a large portal above them complete with swirling colors and elaborate designs of a bygone age.

“Stay safe, Riku,” she said. “See you soon.”

And with that a great beam of light shot down and pulled him into the portal. Her hand was now empty, and she rested it over her heart.

“Well?” King Mickey said.

She smiled. “He’s okay. I can feel him.”

Everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief.

“And… I can feel Sora’s heart, too. He may not remember me yet, but I know he will soon.”

“That’s the magic of the paopu fruit!” Goofy said, then slapped his hands over his mouth as Donald tapped his foot.

“Hey, you weren’t supposed to tell everyone that,” Donald scolded, and everyone laughed as Kairi blushed. Great, did all their friends know about the paopu fruit? Well, not surprising. Juicy gossip had a way of spreading like wildfire.

“Hey, if the Wayfinders can bring me and Aqua and Terra back together again, imagine how powerful the real thing will be!” Ven pointed out. “Especially because you and Sora—”

“Less teasing, more practicing with your Keyblade,” Aqua chided, but she was smiling, and Terra grinned and ruffled his hair. Ven pretended to protest, but it was obvious he liked the hair ruffling and playful scolding.

As the others started up conversations with each other, catching up on how everything had been going since everyone had last seen each other, one person in particular sought Kairi out. Naminé, still holding her sketchpad and pencil but wearing a cute new dress, blue and yellow and white.

“Kairi?”

“Yes Naminé? What is it?”

“I know you’re feeling sad about Sora forgetting you, but I doubt those memories are gone for good. Look at Xion,” she said, gesturing at their friend, who smiled and waved at them. “We all thought no one would remember her, and yet here she is now. Sora’s memories of you will come back, I just know they will.”

“Thanks, Naminé. And when Sora finally comes back, he can thank you properly, too.”

Naminé smiled, and Kairi went over to talk to Axel and Roxas and Xion some more, then to King Mickey and Donald and Goofy, then lastly to Terra and Aqua and Ven. She had something very important to ask, something she wanted to do as Riku searched for Sora and she kept him tethered to the Realm of Light.

“Master Aqua, please take me on as your apprentice,” she pleaded as she bowed low. This was her best shot, her best hope at becoming a better Keyblade wielder after the disaster that had happened at the Keyblade Graveyard.

When she straightened, her throat dry, Aqua was beaming down at her. “I thought you’d never ask.”

She clasped her hands and thanked Aqua profusely. Here was an opportunity to get better, to improve, to become a better fighter by the time Sora and Riku returned. She wasn’t the weak girl that had gotten kidnapped and killed anymore. She had the heart and will to be strong, and she was going to prove it.

However long it might take, however hard she would have to work, it didn’t matter. Someday, she would fight by Sora’s side again. Someday, she would be able to spar with Riku and give him a run for his munny. Someday, the three of them would be together again and all would feel right in the worlds.

And someday, she and Sora would finally be able to make good on the promise they’d made. They’d be together every day, and nothing would be able to keep them apart anymore.

For that, she would train and fight for as long as it might take. Now was the time to step forward like she’d said she would. Now was the time to act. The fight was in her hands, and she was ready at long last.

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A/N: A big thank you again to @chibiranmaruchan! And thank you to everyone who read, reblogged, liked, and commented on the story! Hope you enjoyed :)

#kingdom hearts #kairi #sora #riku #sokai #implied sokai #destiny trio #kairi and riku friendship #kh fanfiction #phoenix writes #phoenix-downer #chibiranmaruchan #collaboration #long post #kh3 spoilers #twewy references

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