#happily childfree

[nirivenova]

Friendly reminder that if your life is fucked up, having a kid will not fix it

[summerreign4077]

Parenthood is an option, not an obligation. It’s ok and perfectly normal to not want to have children. Let’s normalize being childfree. Women are so much more than just incubators for babies.

Reblog if you think a woman can be complete without children

Y’ALL HAVE TIME TO REBLOG THIS. IT TAKES LESS THAN FIVE SECONDS.

[sendintheantiheroes]

I know they've only just announced Practical Magic 2 but if they write that Gillian had kids I am going to go fucking feral

[stereopticons]

sled

Patrick comes through the door, his coat soaking wet and cheeks flushed red from the cold. 

“Welcome back, honey,” David greets from where he’s curled up on the couch. “Did you have fun sledding?”

“Yeah. I think RJ did, too.” Patrick kisses the top of his head before coming around to tuck himself under the other end of David’s blanket. “You sure you don’t want to go next time?”

“Nope. You know how I feel about both children and snow-related activities.”

Patrick smiles to himself. He had fun, but he’s happy to be home. He’s happy with the life they chose.

@schittscreekdrabbleblog

[blurbofparadise]

Unexpected benefit of not having children: all the meds in my house can be stored without those WRETCHED child safety lids! (Before anyone comes after me, I DO know why they exist and what they are for, but there are no children in my house and those lids HURT my HANDS)

[ladyfarona]

[Picture ID: a screenshot of a Twitter post that says

Family: Why would you get tattoos? They're expensive and painful to get and they are PERMANENT!

Also family: Have a baby. :)

/end ID]

[nirivenova]

War: happens

Me: godDAMN am I glad I have zero offspring

[tossawary]

I like the "settle down, get married, have kids" ending for Ed in "Fullmetal Alchemist" because it suits the themes and the character arcs well. But also because there's still plenty of room for adventure beyond the joys of a simple life (it is fun to imagine Ed picking up a million homesteading-related hobbies with all his usual competitive spirit); Winry has a thriving career! She and Ed can travel around the country, visit people, and probably even visit Xing before kids or when their kids are old enough for travel.

But I also like it fine because I feel 100% certain that Edward Elric would not have children unless he was 100% certain that he wanted them and was ready to be a good dad. He would not bring life into this world recklessly. I feel like he would have asked himself, "Is there any chance I might be a deadbeat dad?" and that he was absolutely ruthless with his analysis of his character, like, to the degree that it quickly stopped being funny or embarrassing and started being sad. He'd try and get his own Riza Hawkeye about this: "If it ever looks like I'm being a shitty father or husband, I need you to kill me," he says, sleep-deprived and panicking, and Alphonse can only be like, "Brother... No..."

Also, I feel like we shouldn't leave Winry out of this. This woman is driven and successful and was orphaned because her parents left her for a good cause. She and Ed would sit their asses down and have an excruciatingly thorough and detailed conversation about parenthood and their future. I could buy an AU where they mutually decided to be childfree, sure, but I cannot be fully convinced that they as a team would be reckless about children and parenthood.

I'm sure they'd make mistakes, of course, as all parents do. (I also feel like they would try and make plans with the same focus as automail schematics and alchemic circles, which would often be immediately ruined upon contact with the "enemy". And that Uncle Alphonse would shamelessly and mischievously spoil his niblings against parental wishes whenever his brother's back was turned. Traitor.) But they're also one of those couples where I see them in the cliché "happily ever after" and I can genuinely be like, "Yeah, they're fine."

[skullypettibone]

Go get your tubes tied

Seriously. Watching the US election really is driving home how much this country hates women, and I’m so glad I’m scheduled to get snipped later this month. The US just can’t be trusted to protect body autonomy.

For anyone that’s interested but has been put off by horror stories of paternalistic doctors: getting approved was actually way easier than I expected. My doctor basically said “It’s permanent, you sure?” and immediately agreed to do the surgery when I said yes. I’ll happily answer any questions about what the process was like, and R/childfree has a list of childfree friendly doctors you can find here. And if your insurance is ACA compliant, it should be covered at no cost to you.

[marzipanandminutiae]

horror movie where the protagonists assume the creepy, slightly goth woman with the antique doll collection is the killer-

-only to learn that she's completely normal, she's actually married to the woman who owns the spooky bookstore full of Exposition, and the killer is the true crime vlogger who "tipped them off" about her in the first place. he ran out of interesting murders to mine for content, so he decided to create the perfect crime spree with the perfect killer

(she is also either happily childfree OR pregnant with the couple's first baby, but either way it must be stated onscreen. too often in movies- and real life! -doll collecting has been assumed to relate somehow to children or lack thereof, for women)

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

hi, saw that your Sdv requests are open. I currently have my dogs sitting on my lap and had a thought. How would the sdv bachelors respond/react if the farmer said they didn't want kids and would rather adopt some dogs (or cats or any type of animal if I'm being serious) instead of having children.

Love your writing. Hope you have an amazing week.

Hey hey 👋 Thank you for your kind words and for the ask, dear anon! I'm glad you like my writing and I hope you like this hc too. Have a nice week as well 🫰💕

SDV bachelors react to the Farmer when they said they wanted to adopt a dog/cat/other pet instead of having a children:

_________________________________________

Shane doesn't see any problem with this at all because he had previously sworn to himself that he wouldn't have children. Especially since Shane has already tried a few years as a father figure and realised it's... hard. Don't get him wrong, Shane loves his niece, but with his depression and alcohol abuse previously, he knew he wasn't the best godfather for Jas. But he has plenty of experience with caring for chickens, so Shane brightened with joy when his spouse suggested having more chickens instead of kids. Charlie would have more friends!

Harvey had always dreamed of a happy family, but the local doctor had never specifically thought about having children. He came to the conclusion that he would be happy with Farmer in any scenario. And recently, a friend of Harvey's from Zuzu City was looking for owners for three orphaned stray kittens... So after a conversation with his spouse and mutual agreement, Harvey now have the three furballs who greet him with chorus of meowing, climb up his pyjama, demanding food, and make Harvey and Farmer smile every day.

Sebastian was all for it. He didn't want to have kids either, and didn't have any particular reason. He was afraid that Farmer would take this rather negatively. But since they are both on the same page, how about expand their terrarium and get more cute frogs? Sebastian still remembers that the Farmer named the rescued frog "their son," so "they're already parents to green babies." Sebby will be happy about the addition to their frog family (and won't forget to lightly tease his beloved spouse again).

Sam holds up the Farmer's dog. "But we already have a baby!" And the pooch barked back, wagging his tail happily. Well, they're glad that Sam reacted to their words very calmly. But later the guitarist himself admits that he doesn't see himself as a parent. Especially since they are both so young, and there's still a lot to do and explore. But he also would like to have another puppy. Sam even called Marnie to ask about adopting a puppy. Or maybe two? How about three? All in all, Sam, like Farmer, would be quite happy without children.

Elliott had long since chosen the right words and the right place, for, as it turned out, he himself had wanted to raise the matter with Farmer. The writer decided that since they were both almost entirely devoted to their work and hobbies, they would not be able to pay proper attention to the child, and it would be unfair to the baby. What was the writer's surprise when Farmer told him that they also wanted to discuss the possibility of being childfree. And also the idea of having another cat. Elliott was fine with it, believing that their first cat would like a new friend.

Alex was a little discouraged by Farmer's question, as he was thinking of just discussing with his spouse about children/adoption. Not that he wants kids right away without prior preparation, of course not. But after listening to Farmer's opinion, Alex couldn't disagree with their reasoning. Perhaps he just wanted the happy family life he didn't have as a child. But he was already happy with Farmer. And he'd be even more happy if Farmer agreed to have a couple puppies. Dusty would definitely enjoy the new company!

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Booklist: Decentering Men, Feminist Dating, & Childfree Living

Books On Decentering Men/Feminist Perspectives On Dating (for the times you're in need, you know):

A Single Revolution by Shani Silver (most important rec, IMO!)

Patriarchy Stress Disorder: The Invisible Inner Barrier to Women's Happiness and Fulfillment by Valerie Rein, Ph.D

What a Time to Be Alone: The Slumflower's Guide to Why You Are Already Enough by Chidera Eggerue 

How To Get Over A Boy by Chidera Eggerue 

All the Single Ladies: Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation by Rebecca Traister

Enjoy Your Solo By Mary Delia Allen

How to Be Single and Happy by Jennifer Taitz

Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After by Bella DePaulo, Ph.D

On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good by Elise Loehnen 

We Are Not Born Submissive: How Patriarchy Shapes Women's Lives by Manon Garcia 

The Seven Necessary Sins for Women and Girls by Mona Eltahawy 

Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny by Kate Manne

Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling  Men by Lundy Bancroft 

Men Who Hate Women: From Incels to Pickup Artists: The Truth about Extreme Misogyny and How it Affects Us All by Laura Bates

Fed Up: Emotional Labor, Women, and the Way Forward by Gemma Hartley  

The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love by Bell Hooks

All About Love: New Visions by Bell Hooks

Books On Childfree Living:

Women Without Kids: The Revolutionary Rise of an Unsung Sisterhood by Ruby Warrington

Childfree by Choice: The Movement Redefining Family and Creating a New Age of Independence by Amy Blackstone

Confessions of a Childfree Woman: A Life Spent Swimming Against the Mainstream by Marcia Drut-Davis 

Regretting Motherhood: A Study by Orna Donath

No One Tells You This: A Memoir by Glynnis MacNicol 

25 Over 10: A Childfree Longitudinal Study by Laura Caroll

The Baby Matrix: Why Freeing Our Minds From Outmoded Thinking About Parenthood & Reproduction Will Create a Better World  by Laura Caroll

The Baby Trap by Ellen Peck

Policing the Womb: Invisible Women and the Criminalization of Motherhood by Michele Goodwin 

Without Children: The Long History of Not Being a Mother by Peggy O'Donnell Heffington 

[olderthannetfic]

It really pisses me off when people (both within fandom and without) describe older women in fandom as 'housewives', or assume that they must be mothers. I've encountered a fair number of women over 30 in geeky communities, and literally none of them were 'housewives' - they either had jobs or were disabled, most were not married to men, and many were happily childfree. It's such a grotesquely sexist assumption about the lives of women in 2024.

--

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for making my daughter morning baskets?

Okay so this has been going in circles for almost a month and I feel like I'm losing my mind, so getting external opinions.

I have 2 sisters, A and B. A is happily childfree, B has 2 kids, (6 and 2), I have 1 kid (1). We were all together at Christmas, and Sis A asked how daycare was going (we started doing part time daycare in September). I said it was good, I was getting the time to focus on work when I worked 3 10s the days my daughter goes to care, and then half days the 2 days she's home.

I also mentioned that I'd recently started doing morning baskets for her. My phrasing was something like 'I started doing this silly Pinterest morning basket thing, but it's actually working really well for us, so that's nice.' Sis B mentions that she's seen the idea, but didn't really think it would work for her. I said that makes sense, her mornings are different than mine (she is a SAHM and homeschools her 6 yo).

Conversation moved on to other things and I thought nothing of it, until after the holiday Sis A messages me that I was cruel to Sis B, bragging about making more money than her, and should apologize. I ask what she's talking about and she says the morning basket thing. I clarify that while some people do printables/coloring in their baskets, my kiddo is still eating crayons, so I'm literally taking a couple books and toys that she already has and putting them in the living room so that it's the first thing she sees in the morning. I've found that since there's only about an hour between waking and leaving for daycare, it's helpful to not have her drag every toy she has out for me to clean up later. When I said that my sister's mornings are different, I mean that she's staying home and also doing school/prek activities with her kids, so it's a very different flow of the day. I explained all of this to Sis A, who maintained that I was bragging about my income.

Concerned that I was the AH, I contacted Sis B, because I wanted to apologize even if it was just a misunderstanding. Sis B has no issue, says she's not discussed it with SIs A at all, and further that she assumed I meant her kids' school activities when I said her mornings are different (which is exactly right). Also, because Sis B's youngest is a year older than mine, a fair amount of my kid's toys are hand-me-downs from her, so she thinks the 'bragging about toys' comment it silly. Fair, honestly. I move on.

Until next time Sis A calls. 'Have you apologized to Sis B yet?' Telling her about our conversation and that she's the only one who wasn't on the same page has no effect, she maintains that Sis B is just 'feeling too shamed' to tell me how she really feels. She's now telling our extended family that I'm 'lording my wealth' over them both, and I've got aunts telling me I should apologize. But to whom? For what? AITA??

~~Example of a basket, in case info is helpful: stuffed dino, dino hotwheel car, a couple of books about dinosaurs, some blocks to round it out. This is all stuff that we have already, I'm just grabbing some things around a loose theme the night before.

What are these acronyms?

[angrypotatoboba]

What an icon!

She gone girled irl

[m00nlight-ramblings]

Childfree Gale Headcanons

REQUEST: yes

Some Gale/Tav headcanons being childfree! Some light NSFW. Enjoy

Lots of weekend dates to things like farmer's markets, festivals, and activities within the community.

Spontaneous getaways that Gale always plans - sometimes for a week, sometimes for a weekend, maybe even a day. But he will organize something down to the tiniest detail, and is also very good at keeping secrets/surprises!

Lots of late night talks about whatever he is hyper-fixating on at the moment - your discussions will sometimes last until 3 AM about a book he is reading, or maybe even something you're interested in, in the moment.

Certified Cool Uncle Gale status - you two will happily babysit your friends' kids for the afternoon/evening, and you're always the favorites amongst your nieces/nephews (but you're always really happy to give them back at the end of the day).

Sometimes on a random Sunday, the two of you will spend all day in bed - never getting dressed, and switching between having sex, reading, talking, napping. Gale has obviously never been in a healthy relationship before, so some days he loves to revel in the love you two share.

You two don't have a designated date night, so sometimes when either of you don't feel like cooking, you'll go to the local pub or inn and relax for a few hours. Getting a little tipsy on ale on a Wednesday? Okay, sounds good!

Both of your are very active in the Waterdeep community - ever since you moved in with him, he made it a point to show you off and make sure that everyone knew who you were so you were comfortable in your new home. Because of that, the community surrounding you always feels warm and safe, and you often find yourself doing things together in different groups.

DINNER PARTIES - so many dinner parties. Gale loves to cook and you love to host, so you often have large groups of friends come over for dinner and drinks, with music and games. The dinner parties have become known throughout town as somewhat legendary, and they last very late into the night.

Your home is decorated with lots of not kid-friendly things (magical objects, sharp corners, etc.), but both you and Gale have curated a home that feels comfy and safe, as well as aesthetically pleasing for the both of you.

Tara in lots of sweaters and costumes. Since you're not dressing kids, you're dressing her (and she loves it, even if she won't admit it).

Lots of walks along the water before dinner, while the sun is setting, holding hands and chatting about your days.

There are lots of talks about your future together, and all of the adventures and vacations you want to take - faraway lands, and expensive dinners, and stories infused with the magic of love.

Sometimes, in the middle of the night, when you're both woken up by whatever, you find yourselves unable to keep you hands off of each other, and will make mind-blowing super loud love well until the sun comes up. Passionate, feverish, I-won't-be-able-to-stop-thinking-about-this-night-for-weeks kind. And then once that is done, you two are able to sleep in to recoup the energy spent.

Feeling like you're constantly in the honeymoon period together since there is no other person you need to focus on in your life.

"It's always going to be us," Gale says as he holds you, "The two of us, together. With you by my side, there's nothing we can't do...together. Us versus the world, my love. And we're just getting started."

------

What did you think? I love thinking of Gale as a boyf...he'd be the best partner in the world, I think.

REMEMBER: my inbox is open for requests, so submit something and I'll get to it! :)