#halo forager
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mtg-art-daily · 1 month ago
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Halo Forager
Artist: Kevin Sidharta
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madcat-world · 9 months ago
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MtG: Halo Forager (1 of 3) - Kevin Sidharta
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almostlookedhuman · 2 years ago
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Halo Forager by Kevin Sidharta
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thingsasbarcodes · 5 months ago
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Young Justice 3x06 - Rescue Op
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mintaikk · 9 months ago
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Violet/Halo and Forager are literally just guys I love them sm
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helengie · 1 year ago
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(via "Santa Amanita Muscaria, Sacred Fungus, Amanita Flies, Tripping" Premium T-Shirt for Sale by HelenGie)
Introducing 'Santa Amanita Muscaria' - a whimsical design inspired by the iconic mushroom. With an aura like a saint, Amanita takes on the role of a sacred fungus. Perched on its cap is a fly with big, bulging, round eyes. Turquoise-green clouds hover above the white grass, creating a truly enchanting scene. The pattern's weathered appearance adds a touch of vintage charm. Featuring a color palette of turquoise, green, red, and white.
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atsulovee · 4 months ago
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✧ ─ · · KINKTOBER DAY TWO !! · · ─ ✧
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To Thee, My Eternal Love
Knife play - Vampire!Dazai x Fem!Reader ➻❥ content warnings: blood, threat of bodily harm and mutilation, implied kidnapping, slight yandere!dazai, period typical misogyny (early 1800s), mentioned abuse. ➻❥ word count: 2.2k ➻❥ notes: this one specifically made me glad i put a 3.5k cap on my word count for kinktober lol. i kept catching myself getting way too wordsy so i had to cut a lot of unneeded stuff.
"The red moon hung heavy in the sky, consuming and tearing every little star in its light. Your husband was slotted between your legs, one hand keeping you leg on his hip and the other pointing the silver dagger at your esophagus. Like the old renaissance paintings of the devil, Dazai was handsome."
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“To thee, my eternal love,
Even from so far, I hear the lovely beat of your heart, the alluring race of your pulse. Each night as I wake, your beating heart is all I care to listen for. I have not seen the sun in centuries, nor heard the call of morning roosters, but when the heat of your blood is my replacement, I find I do not mind. 
My beautiful mortal darling, as ephemeral as the petals of a spring flower. I, they call a vampire, a forager of blood, but it is beauty that I seek. Under the cover of darkness, near the churchyard, was when I found you. A muse, an angel, sitting at a grave. So young, so beautiful. I just could not bear letting your beauty be marred and restrained by the common village folk. I knew then you walked in a murky world- one that no one else could understand. You’re far too slight for such burdens. I would carry the world for you, slaughter villages, burn down whomever you ask. It was time to strike, for love could not wait. You fought, and you cried, relieved to be rid of mortal plights. 
I am not the monster you wish to believe I am. My undead heart has not beat in centuries- however, when I am with you, I feel the faintest tremors of a pulse. I’ll live a long time yet, my dear, and I could not bear an eternity without you. The day you die will be the day I’m destined to wander this world more helpless and alone than I have ever been. I’ll call your name to the moon at night, knowing there will be no answer.
And that is why I must never let you pass on from this world. 
Your Darling, Dearest, Dead, Osamu Dazai.”
. . .
To be the perfect doll is to be quiet, docile, and moldable. To be a wife is to be the same. A delicate puppet on silk strings, meant to be taken care of, meant to bend to every will and whim of their man. 
Cursed with your womb, you are all but a fully autonomous person in the eyes of the masses. A woman in the early 1800s has one duty to her family- marry young and above your social standing. Never step a foot out of line and never pull at your own strings. 
You were his- irrevocably, incredibly, dangerously his. Dazai had long made sure of that. 
His hand clasps your own and pins it above your head, a silent command from him to listen as you lie on the satin sheets. In a flurry, your hair splayed across the bed like a halo as blood red light filled the room. To Dazai, you were the light of heaven he was destined to never see. A gift from a God that despised him- perhaps to make up for His transgressions. 
Dazai’s deep, steady breaths puffed against your neck, even as his narrow hips pressed flush against yours. “My darling…” He sighs, never once blinking. Dazai couldn’t stand the idea of taking his eyes off of you for even a second. Each moment, each minute, each hour was so special, so precious. Each second that Dazai dared to spend not gazing upon your beauty was a second wasted. You were human still. And you could so easily leave him, slipping away into eternity.
His hips stilled against yours, the tip of his cock gently kissing your cervix. “My darling.” Dazai nearly whines, leaning forward until his chest pressed against yours just so his lips could gently kiss at your pulse point. Your blood was warm, much like the sun he had not seen in decades, and it was sweet just like the food he could no longer taste. “I adore you.”
Dazai was always a desperate, pitiful man. One who longed for things greater than him and shrunk away when his wishes were fulfilled. But you, his dearest human, was one thing he could never shy away from. 
You were lonely tucked away in his home, but you were safe. There was so much beyond his walls that could harm a human and you were simply not allowed to die by anyone’s hand but his own. 
His cold hand drags up your torso, leaving goosebumps in its wake, and up to your chest. You were so warm, Dazai laughed weakly against your neck as he listened to the heavy beat of your heart. He had no need for you to reciprocate his devotions so long as you stayed alive.
“I adore you, my love. You know that.” Dazai resists the urge to sink his fangs into your exposed neck, pulling himself away to stare at the flush on your cheeks. “I haven't felt such joy in either of my lives- undead or otherwise.” He savored every whine and cry that fell from your colored lips as he slammed his hips in and out of your tight hole. 
His nails bit and tore into your skin, letting droplets of your blood stain the sheets below. You hiccuped and cried every night when he took you to bed, but you no longer fight like you once had. It was a pity, really. Dazai thought you looked especially cute as you kicked and squirmed, trying to fight an inhuman being away. 
You tilt your head to the side, sniffling as Dazai holds you by your hips, forcing you to feel every thick inch as he plunges into you with an obscenely wet noise. Your strangled gasp meshes into a hiss as he punches the air out of your lungs with each thrust.
“Look at me.” Dazai whispers, grabbing your chin and pulling your face towards him. His voice is soft and sweet, a gentle breeze against your lips. But his smile is wide and his grip is bruising. When you fail to raise your eyes, he pulls your hips towards him harshly, forcing you to feel his cock in your stomach. “I will not ask you again.” It’s only when you feel the familiar blade of his dagger pressing against your throat that you dare look at him. 
Crimson light spills into the room like it was a flood. The red moon hung heavy in the sky, consuming and tearing every little star in its light. Your husband was slotted between your legs, one hand keeping you leg on his hip and the other pointing the silver dagger at your esophagus. Like the old renaissance paintings of the devil, Dazai was handsome. In the light, his brown eyes seem to glow mahogany. A horrible, horrible gaze as you don’t dare avert your eyes again.
After a moment, as he studies the look on your face, the resignation, Dazai smiles though he does not lower his blade. “There we go. I missed those pretty eyes, my love. I don’t like when you ignore me.”
As Dazai starts to move his hips once more, he drags his blade down from your throat to in between your breasts and down your sternum.
“You do know why I must keep you here, right?” He begins. “It’s not because I’m cruel and enjoy watching you suffer. There is just so much in the world that could harm you.” Dazai’s pelvis kisses yours each time he pulls out just to stuff you full once again. His thrusts are merciless and rough, one hand planted firmly on your hip, pulling you down on his cock each time he rams it in as the other points his dagger at your heart. “Just as easily as I keep you alive, I could kill you. Isn’t that terrifying?”
His voice is eerily calm and steady, even as wet squelches, gasps, and hisses fill the air. Each thrust muddies your thoughts, filling your mind with nothing but the dopamine of pleasure. It was hard to think, much less hate the man in front of you when he fucked in a way no human could. Then, he sinks the knife into your chest just slightly, enough to split the skin and let small streaks of red make their way down your skin. 
Instinctively, you squirm and whine, desperate to move away as your mind screamed danger but his dagger did not move. It felt like each shuddering inhale and hiccuping exhale would only drive the silver blade further into your chest.
“Calm down.” He mutters, moving the blade from the shallow wound as Dazai leaned down to lie his forehead against yours. He dragged it down your stomach, stopping just above where your womb would rest. “I have no intention to kill you, and you know that. If I had, I would’ve done so long ago. What poor excuse of a husband would ever murder such a darling wife?”
You knew, had learned months ago, what a monster your husband really was. You had made one attempt at escape and you knew to never try such a thing again. Dazai was cruel and vicious with his victims- the poor, innocent people he fed from, but he was so much worse with his love. 
His smile pulled tight as he looked down at you. He had intentions of giving you a second chance only once, if his beloved dared to defy him once more… The night would end with your shared bed soaked in blood as your corpses held one another.
Stakes don’t kill vampires, he had told you that night as he dabbed at the wounds he had inflicted upon you, bloody and weeping. That’s just a silly story that weak humans came up with to make themselves feel stronger. However, silver- something so pure and holy, is just the thing to do the trick. 
“You’re sick.” Your voice wobbles, thick and cracking as your eyes glare up at his. “The only reason you haven’t killed me is because I’m cattle to you.”
“Is that so?” He smiles, stabbing the dagger into the pillow next to your head. Dazai huffs with effort, gritting his teeth, letting his fangs click and clash together as he works open your cunt. “Will you do it, then? Will you try to kill your shepherd? This is the only chance you’ll ever get, darling.”
You spat at him, face flushed red in a way his no longer could, despite the drool wetting your bruised lips. Your rich blood mixed with sweat, streaking down your chest- the mounds bouncing as Dazai grinned.
“Just look at you…” He croons, hand that once held the dagger coming to grip your chin once more. His hand held you with such force, you could see the way his arms flexed. Your once soft skin was marred and littered with blacks, purples, and yellows- with puncture marks from when he had not felt like finding another victim to terrorize. “So precious. I should carve out your womb. No human man would ever want you, then. Even if by some chance of fate, you escape from my clutches, there is not a single person on this earth that will ever consider having you know that you’ve been defiled by me.”
“You’re vile.” You hiss, voice weak and strained. You wanted nothing more than to push your captor away, to reject his advances but such luxuries were fantasy so long as you wanted to live. You clasp your hand over your mouth as Dazai delivers a particularly hard thrust into your cunt, shutting you up. 
Dazai groans, his hand falling away as his desperate thrusts speed up. “I know.” He drawls, “I know. And that’s why I want you. Why I need you.” Dazai pants into your ear, the hot breath contrasting sharply to his cold skin- the chill running down your spine and pushing you closer to him. “Because I’m vile and you’re the best thing to ever happen to me.”
He groans, rolling his hips into yours inch by inch, with the depravity and viciousness of a beast. Desperation ached inside of his bones like a disease, burning and boiling with each thought of you. Dazai loved you so much, he wanted to keep you to himself forever. Wanted to kill you to preserve your memory. Wanted to turn you to make sure he’ll never be alone again. 
As you tilted your head back, walls fluttering around him, he takes his place with his lips on your neck once more. Gently, as he had done a thousand times before, his fangs punctured the delicate flesh. Warm, rich blood pooled into his mouth- only a single drop escaping him. 
Dazai’s thrusts speed up as he gasps, pulling back with bloodied lips. He could barely control himself on the best of days, he’d drain you in but a moment. Each movement made Dazai crave more, the lava pooling in his gut addictive and sweet.
It felt like his cock was molding its shape in your core, truly claiming you as his in the most vile, animalistic way. Everything felt raw, sensitive to the touch. You could barely think, barely breathe with how thoroughly the vampire was drilling your aching cunt. Overwhelmed tears drip off your flushed cheeks as your own incisor threatens to split your lip.
“I need you by my side, my love.” Dazai sighs, kissing down from your temple until he finds the still pulsing wound on your neck. “And so, I must never let you pass on.”
Once more, his fangs find their way into your neck and once more do you feel the gentle cold taking over your body.
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➛ wanna join my kinktober taglist?
➛ tags!! @null-zero-0 @ghostedwriting @Sinfulthoughtsposts @oforphicintent @kiironyx @seasonaldeii @rainsoakedsun @sakui1 @meowimacow
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lokisgoodgirl · 1 year ago
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A Cunning Plan: The Lakes [Loki x Reader]
The Lakes Masterlist / Regular Masterlist Summary: (5) Loki has been doing some heavy mulling. Something's brewing, and it isn't tea. Warnings: Minors DNI. Language. Smut references. Mild angst. Humour. Pining. Ex-Loki. Satchelnanigans. Cunning plans. (w/c 4.7k) Recommended Folklore Track: The Lakes
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The night before had passed with an unnerving air of normalcy.
Loki didn’t speak much, but you could feel the unmistakable weight of him absorbing everything as it unfolded around him. He maintained a quiet distance. Marinating a monologue, perhaps.
You had a feeling it would come to harvest, eventually.
Something hung in the air among the domestic clink of cutlery and quiet apologies as the men squeezed around each other in the cottage. The rabbits were stewed, and much to Steve’s reluctant admission– were delicious. Loki had even taken a substantial loss in Monopoly that evening with uncharacteristic good grace. He and Thor hadn’t even fought over the little dog. And then, he had turned in early. What had passed between you that day – the rescue, the kiss, the supermarket…
His silence, you came to realise, was a blessing. A gift. If one which was grudgingly given. You had heard the low creak of his footsteps above in the living room as Steve diligently packed each playing card away face down.
He’s putting the condoms on Steve’s pillow, you thought with a wry smile. The captain looked up, oblivious.
“What’s got you in high-cotton?” Steve had asked curiously.
“Nothing,” you’d lied, scooting closer to the fire.
When the three of you had traipsed upstairs in single file and bid goodnight – Loki’s door had been closed. But you had heard his low, self-satisfied chuckle through the wall as the captain’s exasperated protestations travelled.
You wondered if Loki could hear your chuckle too. You hoped he could. When the four of you next met the chilled dawn air with bundled scarves and thick gloves, the sun was shining. Crisp, brilliant blue skies made the shade of Loki’s dark halo pop against the increasingly auburn skyline. When you had returned from your lesson, fingers numb and cheeks pink from the morning’s foraging, Loki ambled at the back of the group as usual.
You watched from ahead, seeing Thor and Steve huddled together whispering. They had been twitchy all morning, secretive smiles and hurried glances punctuating otherwise unremarkable commentary about mushrooms.
Loki was ten paces behind, a small basket slung over his arm. He walked slowly, picking up each specimen from his haul and inspecting it like a jewel. Checking every one twice. The Barbour jacket rustled around his thighs, waxed material creasing thickly as he drifted up the steep hill with effortless grace.
And now, the coats were hung on their usual pegs, a chirp of ‘don’t get too comfortable’ from Rogers making the hour break until the afternoon session shorten immeasurably. You closed your eyes, leaning against the kitchen door-frame while a couple of hunks of firewood fit snug under your arm. “Can I get you anything?” Loki murmured from the kitchen sink. You hadn’t noticed him standing there, hands in his pockets. The green scarf still hung around his neck, askew from where he’d yanked it.
In the following silence, his eyes ran questioningly over your features; the ghost of his question haunting the air. Only you, “No, thanks.” you offered weakly, beginning to un-loop your scarf before thinking better of it. “It’s colder in here,” he noted, followed by a sad smile. It pinched his dimples, but didn’t reach his eyes. “Lo-” you started. He turned back to the window. Sighing, you shuffled into the living room where Steve and Thor stood shoulder to shoulder by the fireplace. The scratch of a pen on paper was crisp over their hushed voices. Something told you it wasn’t sharing notes for the orienteering course this afternoon. The captain gave a cautious glance over his shoulder, jumping and nudging his accomplice in the ribs.
Thor coughed, hand flying to his mouth. He turned just as the final scrunched rag of paper sucked between his lips.
He chewed, smiling. “Hurr-oh Agen’” he mouthed, oblivious to Steve’s adjacent frown. Swallowing with difficulty, he leant back against the fireplace with zero finesse. “I didn’t see you there.” “What are you two up to?” you asked warily, crossing the room and emptying the bundle of wood in your arms to the scuttle. Steve’s eyes darted to the ceiling, avoiding Thor’s grin which spread at alarming speed. You decided that under the circumstances, you didn’t want to know.
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The markers you’d set up were supposed to take four hours to complete, but between intermittent downpours and Thor’s affinity for one-sided conversations with wildlife – it had taken six. The team had done well, and you had tried to let them make their own way as much as possible over steep inclines and thick forest.
Squabbling had inevitably ensued. By the time the beleaguered band piled back into the cottage, flopping on sofas and armchairs and the ancient, creaking recliner – all you wanted to do was sleep for the rest of the trip. “Why don’t we start a fire outside?” Steve announced loudly. You groaned. The sun’s last licks of light flooded through the window, illuminating the cottage lounge in an amber shroud. Loki’s forearm draped over his eyes, punctuating the sentiment with a bitter sigh of discontent. “Why must you always be doing something, Rogers?” he lamented.
To your surprise, Thor snapped up on the seat– eyes bright. “Yes! Yes! We can use the...the..” he and Steve pointed to each other dramatically.
“The groove technique!” they quipped in sync. You and Loki’s sceptical eyes met. His peered beneath a thick jumper sleeve; yours only visible above the worn blanket. For some reason, it smelled of him. “How’s this?” Loki postured slowly as he stretched his ridiculously long legs over the armrest. They dangled. “You two, go make us proud outside...and we will recuperate the energy necessary to deal with the result.”
This seemed to please everyone. Out the window, you enjoyed the unfolding show of the super soldier and the god arguing as they managed to whittle the tools required. “They forgot the moss,” you sighed to yourself, as dark smoke began to waft from the stick between Steve’s thighs. “Norns, the moss!” Thor boomed seconds later, panicked limbs flapping as he ran to the outshed.
To your side, the radio began to play soft jazz of its own accord. “I cannot summon the strength to get up. Don’t tell them,” Loki murmured. His arm was still draped over his eyes.
“It was only walking,” you cooed playfully, craning to see if there was the hint of a smile. There wasn’t. “Not that kind of tired,” he replied quietly, tapping the tip of his cheekbone with one curled finger. Biting your lip, you realised you hovered on the precipice of another early night for the god. And, you found, you didn’t want that at all. It was dark outside, now. “You’re allowed to use magic, you know” you said cheerfully, attempting to shift the mood as you snuggled deeper into the thin blanket. The once familiar scent of myrrh and smoked pine needles filled your nostrils. Really, it was uncanny how much this blanket smelled like-
Loki scoffed. “I suppose. It just feels wrong here, somehow. Like I’m sullying something.” You frowned, holding the ragged edge of the blanket out in front of your eyeline. “Loki, did you use this blanket?” His head tilted to the side, suspicious gaze peering beneath the curl of his fingers. “Yes.” was the strained response. “I draped myself in it when I slept down here the night that I...well-” You couldn’t help the giggle which escaped. In all the years you’d known him, Loki wouldn’t be caught dead using something so unconducive to utter pleasure. The very idea was absurd. Furs and pelts and material so soft it made your fingertips tingle when you touched it. Bedsheets so luxuriously sensual that the sensation of them against the back of your thighs was foreplay. The rooms you shared together had been no different, aside from the occasional cushion cover you’d managed to sneak in – inevitably met with distaste and eventual disappearance from the rotation.
Not even Stark’s voluminous fleece blankets during movie night had been acceptable, Loki always had his own magical stash, much to the envy of the others.
You would snuggle into his chest beneath the weight of it, cushioned at every angle with the heavenly material and his safe hands wrapped tightly beneath. They worked their way beneath your sweaters, each feather-light graze of his fingertip against your skin a promise of what was to come. You shivered. “Is that funny?” he frowned. Hurt bubbled behind his irises, frothing. You shook your head.
“I just wouldn’t have thought…” you said quietly, pursing your lips as the god’s stormy demeanour slipped once more beneath his hand.
The vintage clock on the wall ticked.
“I’m going to check on the guys” you muttered.
Even the bitter chill of darkness which waited outside the cottage door, you had a feeling, would be warmer than this.
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Nudged by your encouragement, the sparks created by Steve and Thor had become a healthy blaze.
Flame and smoke twisted upwards to the endless starry night, a miraculous lack of cloud making deep-rooted constellations sparkle.
The three of you perched on a tree trunk the blonde god had heaved over from the edge of the forest. Your chin rested on Thor’s shoulder as you gazed up at the navy sky. After a time, the cottage door slammed. Slow, purposeful footsteps announced Loki’s delayed arrival crunching over the path. Their beat made your heart quicken, its thump soaking into Thor’s puffer jacket.
He walked in front of you all, warming his hands on the fire. They rubbed together, long fingers twisting and locking before he held them up, palms outward. How they glowed, that fair skin luminescent in the fire’s kiss. “Would you give us a moment?” he said.
You could feel the shift on either side of your body as Thor and Steve looked at each other over your head. “Please,” he added coldly, absorbed in the flames. It wasn’t a request. Thor’s jacket hissed as he shuffled from the log, unwinding his arm from your shoulders.
“Yes, well - I have some...business to attend to,” he rumbled – casting another glance at Rogers. Even under the glow of firelight, you were sure the captain was blushing. “Right,” Steve said as he slapped his hands on his thighs. “I’ve been meaning to change the batteries in the ol’...flashlight. They’ve been on the blinkeroo.” With an awkward frown at their efforts, you continued to stare at the back of Loki’s head.
His hair was half tucked into the emerald scarf, dark wisps of wild curl spilling over the curve of his collar. His silhouette was breath-taking; legs wide, triangular and imposing in the caress of flame. If he had any inkling of the captain and his brother’s disappearance into the night, he didn’t show it.
Seconds passed at a crawl.
Sparks jumped and burst from the fire, crackling outward before sinking into darkness. Loki turned, wordlessly seating himself beside you on the tree trunk. You took a moment to look at him. Really look at him. The god pressed each of his fingertips in turn while his gaze was transfixed on the fire. His pupils followed the twisting flames that danced and licked against the night. The shapes pulsed against his cheekbones, a stray thread of hair blowing gently against his jaw. “I’m glad I brought this scarf,” he said quietly, staring ahead. Your eyes fell to the material wound around his neck that had barely left it since you’d arrived. You opened your mouth to speak, before closing it again. “I am sorry that I did not appreciate it-” he swallowed lightly, eyes flickering quickly to yours before looking away, “-when you gave it to me.” You rested a hand on his shoulder, patting gently. Even through the thick wax jacket, and the knitted jumper beneath; you could feel every curve of the muscle you once knew so well. Words turned to nothing in your mind, and somehow – you didn’t need them.
You let the hand fall, looking back to the fire. “Have I ever told you of the cabin?” he murmured, curling the rogue strand behind his ear.
You shook your head. He released a wry chuckle. “No, I suspected as much. I had forgotten it myself until my brother reminded me.” His eyes met yours, alive for the first time since yesterday at the supermarket. They swam with starlight, reflected galaxies spiralling in the smouldering darkness. “My father, well...Odin- built the Asgardian Palace, you know” he mused, running his hands down his thighs with a sigh. “But before that, few people know of where he and my mother resided.”
His voice was gentle, a story-tell lilt replacing the superior twang you had come to associate with his tales of Asgard. This one felt different.
Fighting the urge to tangle your fingers in his hair and mount him, you dug your hands further into your pockets.
“There was a cabin on Midgard. In Tromsø, or what would become Tromsø. It could not be seen other than when the midnight sun shone down beneath two clouds of red, and only the water whispered of it as it travelled through the land. Spoken of in hushed tones around great halls and campfires such as this. Some claimed to have seen it.”
He paused, letting the fire crackle. “Perhaps, some did,” he added quietly. Loki looked up at the exact moment you realised you were staring at him, a dreamy smile spread across your features.
“Before they became what they are to everyone else, they were…” Loki paused, licking his lips. “Different. They hunted, they foraged, they cast magic and made beautiful things for this realm with their kin under the cover of folklore and dreamscapes. They fell in love with each other, with everything. Before they were gods.” “Before?” you gasped quietly. Loki nodded. “All things have a beginning” he murmured, looking back to the flames.
“After the wars, and the taking of Asgard – there was a necessity to leave the cabin-that-had-no-place. And when Thor and I were young, they took us back every Asgardian summer, letting us run in long grass and wear rags and be free on the fjords and hillsides. We had no airs or graces, we played with local children – even flirted a little when we were of that age.” He smiled mischievously. It faded. “But those were different times. A different person, perhaps.”
Loki paused, brows peaking as he stared at the fire. “Or perhaps not.”
You blinked several times, looking away. Flames twisted and blew together as one. “Father gave us these hunting knives when we were sixteen, in your years” he said, an outstretched palm holding the blade. “The summer before our ceremonial inaugurations.”
It glinted in the fire’s glow.
“Uten røtter gjenstår ingenting” you chanted, running the pads of your fingertips over the blade’s inscription.
“Without roots, nothing remains” Loki hummed. “Ironic, considering all it transpired my father covered up. But not entirely without its merit.”
Your brow scrunched, wondering if you should say what you were thinking. “Yes?” he whispered. “Why are you telling me this?” Loki’s eyes tracked down the skim of your cheekbone, falling to your lips before swinging to the crackling fire. He grabbed a stick from the ground, poking the base.
“If I was that boy, once” he said thoughtfully, “then perhaps, there is hope for me. It felt important that I tell you that.” He twirled the stick between his fingers, catching a rogue ember between his tips before it landed on your lap. “I had forgotten him,” he murmured, rubbing the ash between his thumb and index finger. “I liked him.”
You leant your head silently on Loki’s shoulder, feeling his spine soften into the touch. His temple pressed against your hair.
“The thought of you and Thor chatting up poor local Norwegian girls is sending me a bit, you know” you muttered playfully. Loki’s quiet laugh was brighter than the fire.
You stayed like that, flames crackling.
Suddenly something caught your eye to the side, random flashes of white light which flickered on and off about fifty paces to the right.
You frowned, squinting into the darkness. Steve?
The light flickered again. Only the round of the captain’s pert ass was visible behind the tree. You were about to notify Loki to the strange sight when the sky lit up, an almighty crack shaking the air. Instinctively Loki covered your body with his, pressing you down into his lap. You squeezed your eyes shut, bracing for impact or sirens or the cries of a thousand rallying foes.
The god’s chest lay flush against your back, his breathing heavy as your mouth panted open against his thigh. You turned your head instinctually towards his body, cheek meeting the titanic bulge in his worn jeans. He pressed down further, caging you pressed between his thick trunk and thick-
“NORNS, DID YOU SEE THAT?” The thunder of Thor’s boots sounded against the stone path.
Loki’s breath fanned you ear as he rose, the feeling of his weight leaving bringing you back to reality. Turning, you saw thick smoke billowing into the night sky from the cottage, white against black. Loki jumped to his feet, clenching and unclenching his fists as Thor drew closer. He raked a hand through his hair, observing the unexpected scene with incredulity. Steve appeared, sidestepping closer to the muster as he spoke. “Oh gee, a lightening strike-” he said with unconvincing surprise. “I guess it happens! Thank goodness no one was inside.” The only sound was the crick of Loki’s neck as he edged it one side to another. “Brother,” he growled menacingly.
Thor laughed. “I know what you infer, but I do not know the origin of every strike of lightening. That is preposterous!” His eyes darted to the side, before falling guiltily back to Loki. “Global warming.” he added confidently while Steve nodded sagely beside him. The captain looked down at the flashlight in his hand, hiding it quickly behind his back.
Suddenly your eyes widened. “I think it hit my room.” Before you knew it, you were sprinting towards the cottage with the cries of the three men behind you. Their squabbling was white noise as you threw open the door and barrelled up the stairs. Everything you could see was eerily calm. Undisturbed.
The door to your bedroom swung open beneath cautious fingers. Your breath hitched.
The ceiling was open to the sky, a choking arid smell dissipating in the air. Tiles and smouldering ivy lay scattered around the room’s edge.
Your clothes? Sparse personal effects? Bed? Gone. Ash.
There was an unnatural circular hole in the floor where the lightening had landed, showing the far corner of the living room below.
“My chair!” Thor wailed from downstairs.
His plea was clean and crisp through the gaping hole in the floor. You heard his knees hit the carpet, followed by another thump you could only assume was his forehead.
“My chair,” he whined, quieter this time. “Oh, well done.” came Loki’s scathing response.
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“So not only have you decimated one bedroom, but the common room too” Loki muttered venomously, pacing a tight circle in the hall. The lounge window was blown open, shards of glass decorating the floor which held the smoking black outlines of the furniture. “Lightening hath struck the cottage brother,” Thor exclaimed on his knees with theatrical indignation. “Tis’ a natural phenomenon-” “-You’re a natural cretin.” Loki snapped.
“Alright boys let’s just take a beat,” Steve said. “We don’t know what happened here, but suffice to say we’ll deal with the consequences like gentleman.” Loki shook his head, a dry chuckle making his brother flinch.
“Don’t...don’t know what happened, Rogers?!” he quipped with feigned surprise. “Why! Let me just...try to use my magic to un-fuck this mess, shall I?” Thor smirked. Seidr glowed in Loki’s palms, spreading out to the living room. It sloshed upwards like water on a glass dome. “How odd, brother” Loki purred sarcastically. He didn’t even have to look at it. Thor swallowed as Steve’s brows rose. The dark god turned to the captain with a flourish of his wrist.
“My magic doesn’t work on another god’s mischief, you see” he said bluntly. “I suspect I would not be able to locate the whereabouts of your unmentionables, either. But I might start with the crisper if I were you. An old favourite of his.” Thor flushed pink. “Now see here, brother-”
He was cut off by your slow traipse down the stairs. You peeked into the living room; face falling as the three men huddled closer together out of your path. Loki’s mind was afizz. He watched despair cut across your features that not five minutes ago had been resting safely on his shoulder. The memory of that moment, Loki was sure, would sustain him through whatever farce his brother had in store.
“Where am I going to sleep?” you said weakly, looking at Steve. The captain’s lips formed a wide O, eyes vacant. Loki quickly calculated the options. “You can sleep in my room,” he said.
All eyes fell on him. “I will rest...somewhere else. In my brother’s bed as penance for his incredible stupidity.” "What's he got to do with this?" you asked, falling on deaf ears. “And where am I to bed?” Thor huffed. “In the car,” came Loki’s snap response. “Well actually uh-” Steve inhaled deeply, exhaling though his nose. “That won’t be possible. Thor and I need to stay in our assigned lodgings.” “What!?” “Our assigned lodgings.” Loki rolled his eyes.
“Yes, brother. Rogers and I have some important...business to discuss later.” Thor’s eyes flickered to Steve, who nodded. But he didn’t look happy about it. “Assigned lodgings.” he repeated. “I’ll just sleep in the bath,” you said with finality. Loki could tell the tension smothering the hallway was too much. Steve nodded once, clapping you on the shoulder. He gestured for Thor to go first up the stairs. He did, with a final shifty glance backwards.
Loki observed every single step up to the landing with infinite mistrust, hearing their door close with a soft click. Muttering ensued. “You are not sleeping in the bath, Agent. You’ll freeze to death” he spat, running an anxious hand through his hair as he kicked shards of glass from the lounge window further inside the room.
You groaned, resting your forehead against the door-frame. Loki straightened, clasping his hands behind his back. “Take my room.” he uttered, laden with ceremony. “I am a Prince of Asgard, I insist. My word is law. Obey me or face the consequences.” Your face titled towards him, your mouth twitching in a reluctant smile. Loki returned it. “I feel awful,” you whined, biting your lip.
How Loki wished you hadn’t bit your lip. Suddenly, your eyes lit. “Sleep in the room with me. This is dire straights and with those two being weirdos about it-” “-I couldn’t possibly.” he said quickly, catching what he thought might be disappointment in your eyes. The god’s feet shuffled on the floor, seconds ticking loudly. Even a blast of lightening couldn't destroy vintage clocks, apparently.
“On the floor...perhaps.” Loki said. “You could conjure a nice blanket?” you probed. “Some fancy pillows? A treat. No shitty blankets.” Loki nodded, hoping it looked reluctant. Despite it being a terrible idea, excitement twisted in his stomach. “You go ahead,” he said softly. “I’ll be right up.”
He savoured the shape of them on his tongue. It had been a long time, Loki thought wistfully as he watched you go, since he’d said those words.
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You flicked the light on, before turning it off again.
Best to just go to sleep, and then...it will be morning. No chatting. Next door, in Thor and Steve’s room, a floorboard creaked.
You looked around the small space, bigger than yours. But the layout was roughly the same, Loki’s single bed slightly off-centre, near to the wall. A small wardrobe sat sadly in the corner, his collection of outdoor-wear hanging neatly. It was hard to place the feeling bubbling in your chest.
Nerves. Anticipation? You hadn’t been this nervous since the night you and Loki had first had sex. You smiled, remembering how the knowledge that lingerie sat snug beneath your casual clothes made you wish the night away before you finally fell into his bed. It had been the best night of your life. Until that point, anyway. We’re not having sex, you chided silently as you quickly pulled off your clothes and left them in a pile by the bed. We’re not.
But for a second, you couldn’t remember why.
Naked, you suddenly recalled that your nightdress was ash next door.
Fuck, you thought; before hearing the low creak of Loki’s ascent up the stairs. You briefly considered displaying yourself nude and draped over the bedpost with your legs spread. But you decided your ego couldn't take that kind of knock right now - not when a kiss had been too far. You darted to the wardrobe, grabbing something and shoving it over your head before leaping to the bed. Fighting the folds of his tightly packed blankets, you shimmied between the thin sheets. He knocked gently, twice. “Come in,” you said casually.
The sound of low gasps and girlish whispers echoed from next door. Or maybe it was the wind. Loki’s hand appeared on the doorknob, pushing at arm’s length. Tentatively, his face came into view, averting his gaze to the door jam. The sight made you want to scream.
“Are you decent?” he murmured formally. At your confirmation, his gaze found you on the bed, knees curled to your chest and one of his t-shirts hanging loose around your body. Casual. Totally casual. “Ah, I’m glad you found something suitable,” he said gingerly as he made his way quietly to the window and pulled the curtains.
A plump comforter unfurled from green light on the floor, one silken pillow at its top. Magic rolled over his body, revealing the pyjama bottoms he’d been wearing all week. The ones that clung to his ass, shifting like water as he moved.
You swallowed.
“This is all I have in the closet, I’m afraid” he murmured half-apologetically as he patted his heart.
His eye twitched, fighting a wink.
Deep valleys of his stomach muscle clenched as he breathed, the V of his hips carved and beautiful above the hem of the loose trousers. The bulge of his cock shifted in moonlight as he dropped to his haunches, arranging the pillow. You cleared your throat, straightening your legs. “It’s fine, thank you for...this.” He offered a curt nod as he quickly arranged himself beneath the blanket. Rolling onto your side, your fingers slid up your temple through your hair. "You think that Thor made lightening hit the cottage?" "Yes." Your nose wrinkled. "Why would he do that?" Loki snorted derisively as he fluffed his luxurious pillow. Goose down, from the sound of it. "He's trying to be mischievous," he said gruffly. "It doesn't suit him." You rolled back on the bed with a squeak, mind working.
“Goodnight,” Loki whispered in the darkness. The salutation seemed unfinished, somehow.
What felt like hours passed.
The god's breathing was steady, but he shifted every so often with a breathy moan you were sure was intentional. You curled deeper on your side, facing away from him. It was freezing, the usual chill of the cottage not helped by the gaping hole in the roof next door no doubt. Was he facing away from you too? You decided to indulge yourself, rolling over beneath a rustle of bedsheets. Loki lay on his side, facing towards the bed. Dark curls were strewn over his forehead, one hand under the pillow while the other rested by his stomach. The blanket was pushed down to his waist, moonlight illuminating the shadowed carvings of his body. “Can’t sleep?” he purred groggily.
You closed your eyes quickly. “I’m cold, that’s all.” you said, hoping your voice didn’t betray the thundering of your sex. Just being in the same room, half-clothed, sleeping – the evidence of your desire for him slid uncomfortably between your thighs. “How rude, I should have given you my blanket-” There was silence, as Loki considered his words. “Do you want this blanket?” he asked quietly. You put all your mortal strength into making your teeth chatter. “N-n-n-no, you’ve already given me your b-b-bed-” “-You know, you’re making this very difficult for me, Agent” Loki chided from the floor. “The only other option is my-” he paused, making your heart stop. “Body heat” he finished.
“Both?” you whispered, half-hoping he wouldn’t hear it.
It hung between you. You opened one eye, catching the glimpse of his milk-slick silhouette rising silently, cast against the moonlight. The blanket hung from one fist, fingers clenching and unclenching. “Heat,” Loki mumbled quietly.
You wondered if he knew he’d done it.
He paced once, stopping at the bed’s edge. Your eyes met, the set of his jaw only softened by lightly parted lips. Lust burned in dark pupils, the energy making the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Curls fell around his shoulders, the natural scent of his crotch lingering tantalisingly in the air above your nose. God, how you missed that. You shuffled over in the single mattress, realising at once that it would be a very tight fit. He cast a glance to the foot of the bed, and back again.
“Perhaps my brother is still awake, I should make my lodgings there,” he murmured regretfully. Your eyes widened. “But-” “Wait here,” he said firmly.
On his way to the door, he turned and threw the blanket to rest with a flourish over the bed. No sooner had his fingers wrapped around the doorknob and pulled, Thor’s voice came through the wall. Muffled, but unmistakable. ‘Good gods, Rogers...don’t stop,” the voice groaned. “Where did you learn to do that with your argh-f-fingers?’ ‘The army,’ came the abrupt response.
There was another fetid moan. Loki released the door-handle like hot coal while you covered your mouth with your hands. The god hung his head, tendrils of dark hair clouding his expression from view. “Alright...” he breathed stoically to himself before turning to the bed.
Each pace was measured as he drew closer, every creak of the floorboards making you ache for him with every fibre of your being.
“You are cold,” he said slowly, penitently, as his knuckles sank into the mattress.
One knee followed suit.
He tilted his head, biting his lip as his brows knitted with some unsaid thought.
“I can help with that, at least,” he murmured to the darkness.
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Continued in Darkest Night, Brightest Day
A/N - If you're not screaming at the wall right now then I haven't done my job. Ps. If anyone can identify, in full, the actual cunning plan, you will win a prize. Tags @lokischambermaid @meowmeow-motherfucker @gigglingtiggerv2 @imalovernotahater @avengersalways @littledark11 @lokikissesmyforehead @simplyholl @fictive-sl0th @thedistractedagglomeration @loopsisloops @glitchquake @holdmytesseract @jaidenhawke @silverfire475 @fandxmslxt69 @morriggannlostinfandoms @marygoddessofmischief @sebstanwhore @xorpsbane @peacefulpianist @yelkmelk @wheredafandomat @mistress-ofmagic @acidcasualties @ozymdias @your-taste-on-my-lips @lokidokieokie @kikster606 @peachyjinx @tbhiddlestan83 @trickster-maiden @skymoonandstardust @justjoanne242 @thenotoriouserg @ladyofthestayingpower @wolfmoonmusic @brittbax @smolvenger @liminalpebble @joyful-enchantress @kaleenjackson @fictional-hooman @kellatron55 @mrs-illyrian-baby @icytrickster17 @multifandom-worlds @muddyorbs @buttercupcookies-blog @megschaef98
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bowieandqueen11 · 10 months ago
Text
Zoro Falling In Love With You Would Include...
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Request: I've been binge watching one piece this Friday night so I could appreciate your recent requests and finally send one in! Please can you write for Zoro falling in love? 🥹❤️ I know you would do it amazingly!
Yayayay I've been waiting to write something like this for Zoro, thank you lovely!!! I had WAY too much fun writing this one I am so sorry if I went overboard on the imagery but also sorry not sorry I want to press a thousand kisses over this beautiful man's face
Okay this actually took way too much time to write so comments are much much appreciated!!
Warning: slightly suggestive if you squint, mention of scratching/ injuries and sword fighting
(I do not own One Piece or its characters, all rights go to creators. Gif credit goes to @starryyshadows.)
☆.。.:・°☆.。.:・°
Oh, mosshead. What a dopey ass himbo you are. Istg this m*therf*cker right here (affectionate) would be so god damn ANNOYING when he's in love. Forget about Zoro nearly grabbing Sanji by his curly brows and swinging him like a ragdoll over the railings any time his continuous nosebleeds drip into his sake. Zoro is just as bad, just a needle swung in the opposite direction; he grumbles around the ship like a mopey, exasperated crocodile, snapping at anyone who comes near him that isn't you.
He wasn't built for love; hellfire roared through his veins, ravishing every cell in his body until his teeth gritted and lips bled in his struggle for self-discipline. He was a predator; rampant, ravaging, resolved in his fortitude. So why? Oh god, why? Why did he feel like he was being torn apart? Ravished by teeth that left rupturing silver punctures in his lungs, shredded by claws that streamed blinding light through the chambers of his heart.
He had felt like that: bent over doubled, clutching his chest in pain when the two of you first met as teenagers. If it hadn't been pitiful enough that you had bested him during your first sparring match at the Shimotsuki Dojo, you had to rub salt into the wound by being kind to him afterwards. He had scoffed when you had thrown your helmet to the ground and held out your hand to him, a scowl cloaking his face and making his teeth grind as you offered him advice on how to perfect your technique. Yet all you had done in response to his slight was to smile: a smile so shining, so unjustly kindly, so prepossessing and beautiful that the swordsman froze in shock, a fleeting flash of pure light haloing his eyes.
He knew. He knew, right there and then. That you were the only thing in all of the seas that could stand in his way. In that moment, he had decided that he would like to live forever in that strand of light: that one that strayed through a gap between the oak leaves, straying past its dark, dense leaves, foraging past the crawling thickets to instead brush against the tip of your cheek.
'What does it matter anyway?', Zoro had glowered, refusing to look back at you again. 'It's not as if you're going to stick around. Once your gone, I'll be the best fighter here again.'
'I'm not going anywhere. Not until I defeat you ten more times, at least', you added, once you noticed him rolling your eyes. You held your hand out, and Zoro glanced down at your outreaching fingers warily. 'No matter where we are or what happens to us, I'll always be a better swordsman than you.' His lips finally curl up in a smile then as he reaches out to shake your hand, and the feeling sends a spark of something running down his fingertips. His whole body feels alight, and he spends the whole rest of the day clenching his fingers into his palm and trying desperately to relish the feeling.
Which is why, for a while, Zoro seems to go extra hard on you: calling you away after lessons for private sparring matches deep in the woods, where only the crunchy bark could hear your swift steps and the fine mist wrapped around the pale trees and sent a cold shake down your hilted hand. The only way to warm yourself up was to butt the edge of your sword against Zoro's flailing torso, shoving him back so you could use the leverage to pin his panting face up against the nearest tree trunk. This time, though - this time, you surprise him.
If he was disappointed in himself for losing again, it soon melted away by the feel of your torso pressing up against his heaving lungs. For a moment, his lips tighten into a thin line as sees your approaching forehead and believes you're straight up just going to headbutt his sorry ass. He jumps even more when your skin lands... softly? against the burning side of his temple. He can't seem able to find his breath, the world seeming to be frozen in glinting threads of light as you linger against the young demon. All that exists is the soft push of your nose against his fluttering shut eyelid. The warm puff of breath as you sigh against the shell of his ear. The light scrape of the bark against his back as he shivers. The sound of his own heart, his blood scorching through his veins and convulsing against the sharp cage of his ribs.
He's so hyperaware of his body tantalisingly close to yours; his stiff elbows lay drawn up by his side, his hands shaking almost imperceptibly as he spreads and flexes his fingers, slowly drawing them to hover around your back. He was still too afraid to touch you.
Too afraid of the fire burning through his fingertips again.
But before he could muster up the courage you had pulled away, and the moment faded into a jaded dream that he nestled safely in the back of his memories.
It's impossible to shake Zoro from you after that moment. He hounds after you like a coveting beast: he stays tied to your hip like a disruptive dog harnessed on a leash. Your favourite activity is sneaking out of your dorms after hours and running down to meet by the riverbed: feet sprinting across the cream petals and sharp pine needles to collapse next to one another among the buzz of the fireflies nestling above the woven grass. For a while, as the two of you turn your tired heads to the skies, there's nothing but a silent affinity settling over the clearing. Nothing but the feel of the silk sleeve of Zoro's pyjamas brushing over the side of your cheek as unclasps his hands from behind his head and warily rests them in the short space between your hips. Nothing but the sound of your extolled voice as you point up at the bursts of sparks and swirls of silver against the darkness, enrapturing Zoro as you chart out the dips of your favourite constellations.
The reflection of the skies you had spent your younger years on the seas watching with wonder fill your eyes with a wonderous light, the delight drawing your attention away and allowing Zoro the opportunity to docilely turn his head to face you instead. His cheek freezes against the dew, but he's too revered in memorising the scrunch of your nose as you swat your hand at him for not paying attention: too busy watching the placid look that softens your smile as you look, too busy wishing he wasn't so cowardly. Wishing he didn't feel so feeble. Wishing, as his hand clawed at his thigh and dug in deep enough to leave bruises, that he could just reach out and touch you.
He jumps when you click your fingers in front of his crossing eyes. 'Zoro, are you even listening?'
He shrugged. 'Kinda. I don't know much about this stuff. If I can't hit it, I don't care.'
'You should! One day, when I become the greatest sword fighter in the world, I'm going to sail into those stars and discover all the secrets this world has to offer.' You flopped your free hand over your stomach with a content sigh, the spiralling glow of the heavens raining down and coating your face with sparks of silver.
He snorted. 'That sounds stupid. You can't sail into the sky.'
'You're just jealous because you're not invited.'
'Good. Who said I wanted to come.'
Zoro may be an idiot, but he's also a man who learns from his mistakes.
He doesn't know what overtakes him. Adrenaline? Rage? An overwhelming surge of fondness? The thought pounding in his head that if he doesn't do this now, he'll spend forever locked away in this cage? His fingers itch across the grass. His whole body squirms, the heat rolling through his body making the perspiration bead on his forehead, but still he keeps going. It's only when he feels your hand jolt back as his pinkie bumps against the side of your wrist that he begins to feel stupid.
Growing self-restraint be damned, as soon as you recover from the shock and shyly place your hand back down by your side, he pounces. Initially, the squeeze of his fingers as they wrap around your cool palm almost breaks bone, but all you do is rub your thumb over the edge of his knuckles.
You know its his way of telling you he loves you, even if he is too young and stubborn and proud to say it.
You both knew that one day you would leave him for the stars. When the time comes, and you leave Shimotsuki Village, to stop the sinews of his heart from completely scorching away with every knot of your ship, the demon suffocates any thought of you.
When he meets you again that fateful day: tied up to a Marine post in a dusty courtyard, tired, frustrated, solemn, for the first time in his life he begins to feel his judgement sway. When your face popped around the yard gates on your way out from meeting Axehand Morgan, your feet skid so comically across the ground the cloud of smoke it raised was so huge it even made Zoro sneeze. With a hand on your hip, and eyes widened in disbelief, you stepped out into the sunlight to survey the man bowed before you.
'I always knew I'd see you tied up one day', you smirked, shoving the handful of berries you had earnt from trading in your last bounty into the satchel by your hip before wandering over to untie him. 'Just thought it would be me doing the tying.'
'Y/n?', he asks incredulously, trying his best to dart his eyes nonchalantly up and down your body despite how fervently his voice was trying to waver. He sneered, tipping his head in the other direction and staring at the ground as you tug on the rather tight knots around his wrist. 'What the hell are you doing here.'
When you finally manage to tug him loose off the boards, his knees sag so quickly beneath him that the swordsman nearly goes collapsing headfirst onto the ground. With reflexes so quick they could only be rivalled by your own sparring buddy himself, a firm hand slaps against his sternum. A quick tug pulls him back, Zoro's knees dirtying with beige as he kneels back against you.
'Same as you, oh great swordsman', you laugh against his ear. 'I always told you you'd have competition. And from the looks of it, I'm winning.'
For a second you're concerned you've overstepped: the familiarity, the fondness you thought everlasting between you both a figment of your imagination when Zoro tilts his head back slightly to glare at you from the corners of his eyes. Placing a hand on his knee he braces himself, and steps up. For a moment, you're even more terrified he's about to kick you to the ground - or even worse, turn his back and walk off, ignoring you completely. But then he surprises you. The corners of his lips twitch in what - no way- could only be the beginnings of a smile?! before you're lifted off the ground and crushed in a hug so unyielding between his solid chest and taut arms that you can't help but bury your head into his shoulder blade and laugh.
It wasn't very hard to convince Luffy to let you join his crew - I mean, when you took down three Marines with just one punch, and he saw the powerhouse you and Zoro were as you fought back to back with Axehand Morgan, you were coming, and that was that. No buts. No excuses. Don't argue with your Captain.
I mean, bless his heart, Zoro is still a dumbass though, as perceptive as he is. And he's still sore. It takes a little bit of work to climb through the trellises of his grave heart. But little by little, he begins to open up to you again. He starts to grumble less when you climb up to join him during his late nights on watch up in the Crow's Nest. At first, as he burrows his back into the planks and crosses his arms in front of his chest, the steady breathing of his stoic body makes your job seem even harder. Undeterred, you rocked back on your heels and clucked your tongue in nervousness. But you should have known: even with his eyes closed, concentration edged into the furrows of his face, he's far too perspicacious for his own good. Even though he's doing his best to look brooding and bored, his foot shoots out and kicks his sword out of the way - launching it back across your heels and barring you from tumbling back down and falling down the hatch.
Every time you drag yourself up in the middle of the night to join him, you can tell his full concentration is centred on you, even if his eyes never even move behind their lids. He's pointedly listening out for your move, your every breath, your every heartbeat - which comes in very handy for darting out and catching in his massive palm the warm cups of cider you had precariously tried to carry up. Eventually, after a full week of you sitting up there Zoro finally relents his pride; even with Luffy's vest and Usopp's jacket wrapped around you, you clutch at the lapels of Sanji's suit jacket that your friends had very kindly lent you to try and stop shivering from the cold. Zoro doesn't even speak, just raises his elbow a little bit, and you don't need a second invitation to come clambering into the warmth of his side.
God, if he hadn't spent every moment of every day since he was thirteen years old dreaming of holding you in his arms. You pretend, for his sake, that you can't feel his heart thrumming wildly against your ear.
You catch the former bounty hunter staring at you from across the Lounge’s breakfast table most mornings. The intensity of his unwavering eye would be strong enough to make you blush, if you hadn't turned your attention back to stabbing at Luffy's grabby hands with the prongs of your fork. It's only when Sanji clasps his hands to his cheek, and in a faux sugary sweet sing-song voice professes 'how romantic mosshead can be! What person wouldn't love being stared at like roadkill!', that all hell breaks loose. Luffy's too busy munching on your pancake to truly register you and Nami nearly flying leapfrog over Zoro's back to try and stop him from throwing the poor cook through the window.
Although you succeed, Sanji does have to spend the rest of the morning sulkily smoking out of the corner of his mouth while wringing orange juice out of his hair.
Zoro is extremely, extremely protective over you. Even though you know how much he hates talking, he draws all the attention to himself away from Cabaji, even while tied up to Buggy' circus wheel. When the knives start whizzing past his head, he doesn't even flinch: safe in the knowledge that no matter what happens, you're safe from these buffoons. When Nami finally manages to pick her cage's lock and help free the two of you, you offer Zoro your hand as you cautiously steady him on the ground again. He jolts, and for a moment you're worried one of the knives actually did hit him; while you flip his palm trying to find any sign of a scratch, Zoro's eyes focus on you in wild shock. He feels fifteen again as he gently rubs your searching fingers between his coarse pointer finger and thumb, sobbing into his bed and holding the hilt of his sword, pretending it was your hand. Your warmth. And here you were, come back to him, offering it freely. He felt like falling to his knees, a pliant supplicant to your unwarranted mercy.
One time he nearly made you bust out laughing: since Zoro spends most of his day napping in such random intervals, during a rogue storm aboard the Going Merry one cloudy evening the swordsman was still awake. It was during your struggle to stop yourself pitching right off your bed and slamming into the wall, and planting yourself firmly from sliding to the left and body slamming a very irritated looking Nami, whose head was covered by one of her bunched up pillows, that you spotted a shadow flitting across the porthole on your door. Zoro's tall, awkward outline hesitantly moved as if he were about to rap at the door, before the sound of him yelling at himself under his breath made you snort aloud.
His head rises at the sound, and before he can take a step backward to try and abort his masterplan of sneaking into your room under the guise of checking if you were alright with the storm battering the rocking ship, you had slammed open the door and nearly flung Zoro into your hammock like a ragdoll. For a moment, Zoro lies there like a statue, unsure of where to put his hands or if it's alright that the sway of the ship means that he can't unsquish his cheek from against the side of your eyebrow. When his hand hesitantly begins to fall over your back and fold you tightly against his pecs with a squeeze, you know that's his trepid way of trying to let you know he still loved you.
Not to mention when you wake up and he's lying with his nose nearly indented into yours, his sleepy eyes looking so peaceful for once... just admiring you with the warm glow of the sun dousing him in holiness.
One time he got really lost trying to find you and Luffy after the two of you had the very sensible idea of setting off to the nearest island on a search for hidden treasure. After he had spent hours wading through muddy creeks and tearing some tangled thorns away from his face, out you come wandering from behind a tree. Thinking you were some kind of wild animal, Zoro has you pinned against the bark of the nearest tree before you even have time to blink.
Not one to be defeated, you kick out at his legs with a delighted laugh, knocking the man nearly ass over head onto his back. You grin, victorious, as you crawl between his legs like a ravenous tiger, knocking the hilt of his blade far out of reach of his clenching fingers. As your knee presses against the inner seam of his muscled thigh, you can tell by the forced gulp of his bobbing throat how hard he's struggling. When you dig your fingernails deeply enough into his wrists to elicit a throaty hum of approval, when his abdomen keeps bucking ever so slightly off the reeds to try and shake you off, you just know the man's imagined this scenario a lot of times, in a lot of different ways over the years.
(I mean this man could throw you off easily let's be real.)
When the Straw Hat Crew meet Kaya, this man - istg - he nearly goes weak at the knees when you come down the stairs in your brand new borrowed outfit. His breathless inhale earned him a distasteful glare from Klahadore, but he didn't even care that he was showing such careless, unmeasured adoration. It took Luffy nearly slapping him across the face with the shrimp he was waving in front of his nose to draw him back to some sense of reality.
'I know!', the Captain had smiled. 'The food here is so good, I was daydreaming about it too!'
Having the good fortune to uh *definitely by chance and not because you snuck into the dining hall earlier to switch the place cards* - to sit next to Zoro offers him the opportunity to make his feelings more plain, in a subtle way. Perfect timing! As soon as Luffy clambers up onto the table and draws the wrath of the strangely severe butler, Zoro's hand latches across yours under the tablecloth and squeezes. He blinks languidly, his face as unreadable as ever as he takes a sip out of his champagne flute and clears his throat, but you notice. You know every part of him: every idiosyncrasy, every bob of his Adam's Apple, the tensed pull of his jaw muscle as he clenches his teeth, the warm flush rising up his cheeks, you know them all. As if they were so innate, so interwoven with your own being, that you weren't sure of a time when your hearts hadn't been devoured by each other's. Each the predator. Each the prey.
He leaves his hand on your knee for the rest of the dinner, and you refuse to remove his latched fingers and let him go.
You kiss him for the first time that night: just a sweet little tease of lingering lips against the pure radiance of his cheek.
As he walks you down the 'confusing' corridors that are 'definitely a trap' by Zoro's own declaration, you unlink yourself from his arm to straighten the collar of his silk shirt. 'You look nice', you say sincerely, eyebrows furrowing as you trace the outline of his bare collar between the open buttons. 'Even though swords are more your style, you look good in a suit. You look good in everything.'
'Uh... thanks', he balks, his head emptying as his entire being instead focuses on the feeling of your fingertip scratching of his chest. 'You- your eyes look nice', he bluntly replies. 'Like two rice balls.'
Bless him, he meant well.
And then you kiss him with a raise of your tippy toes and final clutch of your hands against his shoulders, before retreating back into your room and leaving him extinguished within the shadows. He spends the next few hours almost deliriously wandering the corridors, trying to temper the tight ball growling in his belly. To try and find a sense of clarity, some kind of retinence. Looking past the billowing blue curtains and out through the slats of the casement windows lining the ornate, ostentatious glass cases, a warning pangs in Zoro's heart. How could he? How could he find restraint, when you had spent all these years driving his thoughts wild? How could he keep you safe, when he could focus on nothing but the wetness still lingering against his cheek? How could he fulfil his dreams, when all he wants right there. Just past the clear moonlight drifting silver into his eyelids, there your stars lay.
He wasn't about to let you sail away from him this time, to alight only in his memories: to pulse through the hollow beats of his hear and cool his charred veins like a cruel reminder of a salvation he had never deserved.
He wasn’t going to lose you to his callow cowardice. Not ever again.
When he comes knocking on your door, you don't expect the demon bounty hunter to blurt out a fevered 'I love you!', before turning and stamping off. But I suppose, as you ran after to him to drag him back into your room by the scuff of his neck and slam the wide expanse of his back against the door to shut it, he wasn't expecting to spend the night filling poor Kaya's house with unbridled moans.
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sunofpandora · 1 year ago
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𝓓𝓲𝓪𝓹𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓸𝓾s
Part 2.
Spider is 19, Y/n and Lo’ak are 18, Neteyam is 19, Kiri is 19, Tuk is still 7-8.
‘Kxa’ran’ is a random na’vi name I made up. He is 18.
Disclaimers:
Mentions of uncomfortableness, trying to steal neteyams girl, lo’ak and spider being the y/n protector squad once again, Jake giving fatherly advice, Lo’ak swinging (it's called a punch, bitch) Neteyam and Y/n riding off into the sunset 💙👏😫  
Not rlly smut but gets a lil steamy at the end.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
Y/n was a shadow.
She hid herself within the corridors of a raincloud, gentle touches of droplets caressing her skin.
She hides in the whispers, gently singing through the flowers that stitched up the bark of a tree.
Her vision warped into a blur of sounds and colors. I suppose that's why she yearned for nightfall.
On occasion, the sun looms over us like a scolding parent. Fervid gazes and persecuting streaks of heat. A torrid spotlight refusing surrender. 
But oh, how she loved the night…
A veil of sounds, shapes, sporadically neon shaded by the incandescent bioluminescence of Pandora. 
Secrets and stories scattered among a sea of stars. The moon, a searchlight for souls. 
Alluring sirens of the dusk, dragging us to delirium.
If dark, if dreary, if dangerous, if endlessly indefinite, why so amorous?
She spoke to the stars, stole secrets from the sky, and wore moonlight as if a veil.
Sobs and sorrows for the forgotten stories. Requiems for rain clouds and silent storms.
Perhaps that's why she loved the night.
When the world became a shadow, she didn't feel so alone…
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
Gathering in groups was a normality for the omaticaya.
Today, a group of na’vi was sent to forage herbs, pick fruit, wash away the dirt and grime embedded over time in things like bowls and objects for eating.
They left high camp a bit after morning, departing themselves from the clan’s rocky stronghold and descending below to the jungle.
Y/n sat perched under a tree, 
She gently traced her fingertips up the lines of a small white flower, curiosity and soft wonder embedded within the universe of her eyes.
Observation is a powerful thing. Hearing, sensing, seeing things past others grasp of understanding.
It's a binding freedom 
“Y/n?”
Shaken from her fortress of solitude, Y/n is met with another shadow.
This one looms. It stalks over what little light Y/n allowed in her small dwelling of dusk within the shade of the tree.
It's raining, but it's not the kind that nurtures.
Plants fall to their knees under the man’s thunder of a laugh, mercilessly triumphant, yet accompanied by no accomplishment. 
Kxa’ran.
Y/n peers up in recognition.
Kxa’nan earned himself a place in the flock of warriors Jake trained, Neteyam included. Neteyam and him were commoners of the same stability. Both warriors, neck and neck. Where the Golden Child stood, Kxa’nan rising behind him. One compared to the other. The silent rivalry of two warriors. 
Kxa’nan was a shadow. Not a shadow like Y/n. He was a void, it repels vulnerability and authenticity. 
Kxa’nan’s movements were rehearsed, not-so subtly flexing himself for Y/n's uncomfortable gaze.
You hate it when he flirts with you because he flirts with everyone. It's a cruel joke, really. Disguising something as binding as affection, to cradle someone's heart within the palms of your hands, to build it a home out of glass and shatter it.
“Kxa’nan.”
You greet politely.
You didn't like him. But you weren't an asshole.
He laughs.
What was even funny?
“Whatcha doing here all alone, huh? I'd thought you'd be with your little friends?”
You assume he's talking about Spider and Lo’ak.
Y/n shrugs, avoiding eye contact as best as one can. Trying to focus on the intertwining pattern within the sky, the dim golden halo that laid itself on the tree, leaking through the canopy-quilted and stitched with shades of green.
Kxa’nan dips his gaze down to Y/n's hands. Nimble, soft things. Drawing lines of tranquility in their wake.
His touch invades streaks of silent panic through your body when he reaches down to touch your hands, and the flower cradled within.
“Is that a flower? It's very beautiful..where did you find it?”
His voice is 
You felt exposed. 
Choppy, unfinished breaths tumbling from your lips.
His mere presence overbeared you, yet, Kxa'nan was nothing but a hollow shell.
His figure was made of pesky shadows and illusions of whispers that taunted you, like the laugh of a viperwolf.
He was a thief of trust.
He saw something, an interchangeable force the at spread like the roots to each person, tying us to this shape of vulnerability that appeared as a plaything that held no value to him.
Trust, to him, was a game. A continuance of an arousing match of case and capture, where you find yourself caged.
It's like a scythe when it hits, I panic.
Jake calls it anxiety.
Jake dragged his knowledge of it with him when he came to Pandora.
Jake taught you how to breathe. 
Funny enough from the man that once needed a mask. 
Taught you how to count your breaths from 10 to 1. How to count the leaves on a branch and wait for your chest to not feel so instantaneously heavy.
For a moment the stars fall. The shadow that once deemed itself an attendant of comfort is now a shallow pool of a storm. The ground feels cold, heat rushes to your wrists.
The words bombard your brain.
Leave me alone.
Leave me alo-
“Hey! Back off. I thought I told you not to bother her.”
A familiar five fingered hand finds its home onto Kxa’nan’s shoulder, yanking him back and standing in front of you. 
A tall na’vi with the sides of his head shaved and lazily tied off braids barricades you.
“Can you not fucking count? The 8th time this week I've found you bothering her. Don't you have something better to do?”
Lo’am shoved the boy backwards, his voice a low hiss of annoyance.
Lo’ak was an anarchist of his own recklessness. His gaze grazed with fire unapologetically unable to sit still. 
Sometimes the smoke and ash becomes a haze of intangible adrenaline. preservations for one’s safety wither away under the charred sky. Lo’ak’s anger was a shallow thing, much like his mother.
That's where people fail to truly see, Lo’ak
He was just as protective as Neteyam, if not more. Lo’ak and Neteyam were simply two sides of one stick, one sharp, one blunt. One can be applied as a knife, the other in aid as a crutch or to lean on.
Kxa’nan scoffed.
“I can't count? Tell me, how many fingers am I holding up?”
Kxa’nan taunted Lo’ak by jabbing at his “demon blood hands”.
A smaller, pale figure appeared next to you, grabbing your arm, pulling me to your feet, 
In the unwelcoming sequence of three na’vi, spider remains unwavering. 
His gaze stern, annoyed.
“Get lost, idiot.”
Spider glares.
Your wrists don't feel so hot. The ground doesn't sink, the shadows aren't so loud.
Always count on Lo’ak and Spider. As stupid as the two can be.
They were your boys. Your brothers. A type of love that was stitched together out of mismatched pieces.
They fit if you place them in the right position.
“Touch her again and i’ll punch your ass so far into the future you’ll meet the next generation.”
Lo’ak stands, fangs bared, chest almost touching.
Kxa’nan laughs. 
It's thin
it's fake
it's forced.
“Y/n, yawne, did you forget to leash your companions before leaving?”
He smirks at you, and you facepalm at the storm approacching
There's a silence. Worth 6 beats.
“The fuck did he just say?”
Lo’am rhetorically asks the jungle air, before turning to spider.
“Spider. What did he just say?”
“I think he called us animals, Lo’ak.”
“Should we let that slide?”
“Me personally? I would never.”
Spider sighs disapprovingly. Like a parent gently urging a child to make the right decision, clean up their act.
That's the beauty of Lo’ak and spider. 
They fail to see the true weight of any situation when the two face it together.
Everything dark and dreary dusts away under a bad joke and some back-and-forth 
“Guys. C’mon.”
You reach for Lo’ak, tugging him by his armband away from this quandary he's planted himself in.
Lo’ak follows reluctantly, sparing a lingering glare at Kxa’nan.
“Try that shit again, I dare you!”
Lo’ak calls over his shoulder. 
“He dares you!”
Spider fans the fire.
You groan, not expecting to be babysitting two idiots today. 
“For the love of Eywa you two-”
Your boys. You loved them anyways.
If you were a shadow, Lo’ak and spider were your clouds. Protecting you from looming notions that threatened to tear the darkness. 
Neteyam watched from afar.
Neteyam wasn't normally a very angry person. 
Inconspicuous glares and silent mumbles. Flicks of his tail subtly revealing his brewing emotions.
Other than that, Neteyam wore a mask. 
Accustomed to pleasantries, never daring to chase beyond the notion of familiarity. Having an audience, the constant need to entertain those even he swore to eywa he couldn't tolerate, was a burdening thing.
Eye contact. Smile. Sit up straight. Don't laugh too loudly. 
Some swore if they turned neteyam over and searched the right corners, you'd find puppet strings.
His mask grew with the years, cracking only in small fragments wear vulnerability leaked through the crevices, small silent outbursts of leashless emotions.
It's a rare sight.
But at this moment, Neteyam swore Lo’aks fire was spreading.
Loneliness came as a luxury for neteyam. It was the only time he allowed himself to truly become hers.
Some nights, all he dreamed of was her.
Her. Her. Her. Her. Her.
Oh, how he longs for her. 
If he kissed her, if he even so much as grazed her skin, he'd fear shed disappear back to the shadows.
Coaxing hesitance was a second-nature concept.
Yet, he's haunted by an insatiable compulsion to protect her.
Ghosts of daydreams, husks of lingering touches and reincarnations of longing gazes. Rain carries ghosts that cherish the fragments of their lives within the darkness of the clouds, because the vexatious luminescent antagonist we claim to be sunlight, provides no sanctuary to a ghost.
Perhaps that's why his daydreams abandon him. 
Perhaps the dissipate to his own negligence.
He was always yours. He didn't want you in the way Kxa’nan did. Your heart wasn't a game or an object to be used, then discarded.
You were a story. He would treat you like one of your flowers unless you wished otherwise. 
He would do anything for you.
He would steal every happy ending for you. 
You preferred small corners in which he couldn't fit. You preferred night to day. 
Neteyam was in sunlight.
You were a shadow.
And sunlight and shadow cannot touch. 
Neteyams attempts to dim himself always became futile. Dreams of touching you became glimpses. It lingers in a flurry of color, his palms longing for your warmth.
Vexation was silent.
It never screamed.
Until this moment.
Kiri, whom was rambling about the river crystals she planned on collecting, thanking neteyam for letting him use his basket as she waded in the shin deep Creek, 
Neteyam’s lne of focus scrutinized the sight a few trees ahead of him.
Kxa’Nan grabbing your hands, rubbing his thumb along your knuckles.
He couldn't hear, but neteyam could see your agape mouth, he sensed inaudible shallow breaths.
He was touching you.
He was touching you.
He was touching you.
He was touching you.
Aggression stirred beneath his skin.
How he watched Kxa’nan skip off like nothing happened, after Spider and Lo’ak made their grand entrance and not-so-swift escape.
“Pandora to Neteyam!”
Kiri chucked a yovo fruit at his head.
The man had been staring into space for the last 6 minutes. 
Kiri personally didn’t spare something as precious as brain cells on something as meager as the two unbearable creatures she called her brothers, but the occasional pestering that accompanied their relationship has become a necessity.
Kiri had found some feathers near the river on her hunt for crystals.
She was offering them to neteyam for his knife sheath (she’s been begging him for weeks. His sheath is just ‘too boring’ for her taste.)
  when she found her brother mindlessly wandering his gaze ahead.
“Ow-
What the hell-
Kiri!”
He glared at his sister.
Kiri huffed.
“Sxkwang. You’ve been zoned away for minutes now! Are you loosing your hearing?”
Neteyam rolls his eyes, his mood suddenly deflated.
“No. I’m fine…”
Kiri’s playfulness withers for a moment.
Kiri was a lot of things.
Kiri was modest, compassionate, candid and capable.
She spoke to the forest the same way Y/n spoke to the stars.
Kiri perched herself next to her brother, nudging him with her tail.
“You okay?”
He shook his head.
Something flickers past Neteyam’s features.
It’s soft, light, a thin layer but its presence isn’t going unnoticed. 
Something that can almost be mistaken as regret contorts  his features.  His confidence has fallen. Not completely, only slightly. A somber shade of gray dances past his face.
There’s a few beats of silence.
It’s not uncomfortable. It’s understanding. The two siblings find a common ground between this void of conflict.
“Do you think mom was ever afraid of Dad?”
Kiri stayed quiet for a moment, the question stilling her.
“Mom? Our mom? Neytiri Tskaha Mo’at’ite?? Afraid of our father? 
You humor me, brother.
If anything, dad should be afraid of mom.”
Kiri chuckles, leaning back against the tree.
Neteyam chuckles as well, but it sobers itself in a flash of memory.
When they were small, Neteyam and his siblings would curl around the fire In their families marui, neteyam would sit next to y/n, while Lo’ak laid his head on her shoulder, obnoxiously snoring into like the 6 year old he was.
Kiri sat on the other side, looking up in awe at her father as Jake spoke.
Jake told his children stories of a time that was before the marine learned to see.
He grasped the essence of life: the  immunology of pandora. The power, the secret to growth, a true appreciation for the relative importance of things, order, and balance. 
He told his children of the corpse of a life now forgotten, where the fallen hometree remains but memories rots.
Jake prayed to eywa his memories could rot with it.
He told stories of earth, as well.
Comparing his wife to Cupid, fond of arrows. How she stopped his heart without even grazing it.
Neteyam was an idiot for love stories. Especially as a child.
Particularly his parents’ love story.
How two people, worlds part find themselves together under the sky of pandora. The day they met. The day the stars aligned and two hearts disregarded the burdens of a cruel reality, and found a home within a war. Found intimacy through the most painful of grieving.
If Jake and Neytiri, a former human and a na’vi,
Why not Neteyam and Y/n?
Why not the sun and a shadow?
Kiri stilled for a moment.
“I guess..maybe there was fear of mom’s loyalties being internally tested?
Maybe she thought she would have been betraying her people if she mated with dad.
Remember the Cupid story?”
Neteyam contemplates it for a moment.
“But mom didn’t mate with dad till after his iknimaya? He was already one of the people. He claimed his ikran, and  through dreamhunt.”
Kiri shrugged.
“True. But he kinda got his na’vi card revoked when hometree fell. Don’t you think?
Are you suggesting you want a woman to shoot you with an arrow?”
Kiri chuckled.
Neteyam can’t help but snicker.
A somber stillness comes over him once again, his voice is quiet. Fragile.
“Do you think at one point they thought that..
That maybe they just couldn’t be together because dad was a human?
Because two people are so different, it’s never even a possibility? 
That our insecurities fester into doubt?”
Kiri stares with tints of concern for her brother, placing a hand on his shoulder.
He seemed to be getting a bit too worked up for a light conversation.
There was something about embedded underneath. Hidden.
“What if-“
“They loved eachother.”
Kiri interrupts Neteyam’s maddening anxiety for a moment.
“They loved one another.
It’s almost impossible to neglect when your so deeply in love with someone. Even if you convince yourself  conditional, unbinding. They were in love.
She held him even out of his avatar when he was dying in that shack.
They were always meant to be, Neteyam…what is this really about?”
Neteyam swallows thickly.
His deep, accented voice grazing the edges of a sharp concept, dripping with denial.
“Do you think the sun and a shadow can fall in love?”
Kiri is quiet for a moment.
She’s not confused.
For once, her brother's mask cracks. 
For once; the warrior needs protecting.
There's Something unguarded and raw behind his gaze. There’s something fragile. 
And most protect fragile things.
“This is about Y/n, isn’t it. What happened, Neteyam?”
Neteyam sighed.
“Kxa’nan.”
Kiri’s eyes thinned at the mention of his name.
He once ‘accidentally’ tripped her while she was walking, and refused to come clean when neteyam confronted him.
Jake didn’t even like him.
And Jake was the chief of fucks sake.
“What did he do?”
Kiri suddenly felt her own wall go up.
She thought of Y/n as much as a sister as she would Tuk. Memories of giggling and gossiping after the brothers and tuk were asleep and Jake and neytiri went on dates. Telling eachother stories and braiding each others hair.
You were a shadow, and Kiri was your Venus. 
“He touched her hands. Just like-
Grabbed them.
And then she had one of her-“
Neteyam makes a motion with his hands to indicate erratic breathing but ends up just deeming himself laughable.
“She had an…asthma attack?”
Kiri made her first guess.
“No-
She had like-“
Neteyam struggles to articulate himself.
“You know when her breath gets kinda shallow? And she just-“
Kiri spares him the embarrassment.
And herself a headache.
“Yes yes. I know-“
She freezes.
“Wait. You saw this happen?”
“..yes I thought I made that clear-“
“And you didn’t go and protect her?”
“….”
Kiri smacked neteyam upside the head.
“Ow! Kiri! That’s the second time you’ve hit me!”
“You skxawng! You fool! You dumbass!
You didn’t go to her aid!?
Eywa help us all. You’re right. You suck at this.”
Neteyam’s ears pin back and he winced.
“I was going to-“
“Bullshit!”
“Kiri I swear!”
“She’s afraid of me!”
The two are still at the brusk's confession.
“Neteyam. Y/n may not be…the most comfortable with everyone but she’s not afraid of you-“
“Yes she is.”
Neteyam cuts her off.
His tone is defeated and blank.
Acceptance is an essential part of grief.
“Neteyam….”
“Doesn’t she know I would do anything for her?
I would steal the night sky for her.  I’d make the whole world become a shadow so she doesn’t feel so alone-
It shut myself away so that she has nothing to fear. I’d never draw another breath again if it meant she’d smile.
It’s beyond precious. It’s beyond anything I can describe, sister-“
Kiri’s mind struggled to keep pace with the maddening reality of Neteyam’s violently clashing sentiments.
It hits Kiri.
“You love her.”
“Sister, I worship her.
There must be something wrong with me.
I swear the stars envy her.”
Kiri and him sit for a moment.
“You asked me if the sun and a shadow can fall in love?
Do you remember what norm told us?
Moonlight doesn’t exist. Moonlight is reflected by the sun.
When the world becomes a shadow, the sun provides what little light it can to the darkness so it doesn’t fall pitch black. 
She dwells in the dark? Give to her what you already provide.”
“And what is that?”
“Light.”
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
“Should have just let me fuck him up.”
You groan at Lo’ak’s words.
You, Lo’ak, and spider were weaving a chain of leaves and branches for a hunt festival later that night.
Y/n didn’t like large crowds. She fared better with her two idiots, much to the dismay of other na’vi in the clan.
Spider snickers.
“Maybe if your little boyfriend showed up, he could have swept you off your feet and protected you.”
You roll your eyes.
“Neteyam was probably busy helping Kiri. He probably didn’t hear his maiden’s cry for help.”
Lo’ak and Spider both cackle.
“You two think you're funny? I don’t need neteyam to come defend me.
And he’s not my boyfriend.”
Lo’ak gasps dramatically.
Then he chuckles.
“Listen sis. Our existence is the height of hilarity. 
You're just mad that neteyam didn’t come and tell Kxa’nan off.
By the way, Can we get a thank you? 
We saved your ass back there.”
It’s roll your eyes, shoving Lo’ak, with a small mumbled ‘thank you’.
“Y/n? Can I get some help?”
Jake comes into view, tapping you on the shoulder.
You stand, following him back to the family marui.
You find yourself helping Jake repair a human object called a ‘radio’.
It played music and could record things as well.
Jake and Neytiri have a tradition. They’d dance the human way at a festival, out of sight from others.
You found it beautiful, really.
You didn’t have parents of your own to witness a growing relationship between. But watching Jake and Neytiri was far more interesting. 
Jake seemed to notice how quiet you were.
And not as quiet as usual.
To the surprise of many, you cling to Jake more than you did Neytiri as a child.
Not to say neytiri wasn’t able to take care of Y/n.
Neytiri adored Y/n. Considered her a 3rd daughter.
And well, she was the closest thing to a mom y/n would have after her own mothers death.
It was different with Jake.
Y/n has some flashes of memory with her biological mother.
With Tsu’tey? She had none.
Neytiri found herself in a place that once already held a shadow.
Meanwhile, Hake had to make his own shadow.
Reflections and reality, gentle whispers and ruffling her hair, Jake was gentle as he could be.
He considered Y/n and Lo’ak like twins solely because of their separation anxiety as children.
 y/ns shadow and Lo’ak’s fire was a constant contrast in Jake’s life.
Jake would pick her up, rest her in the crook of his elbow; whisper small, gentle things.
Jake was much more protective and diligent over Y/n.
He always thought she saw the world much larger than his other children did.
Jake realized Y/n liked flowers and plants because they were easily satisfied with company. 
They aren’t people. She didn’t have to raise her voice or embed herself in a state of stillness.
Jake heard the whispers.
“Does she even speak?”
“She’s a bit old to be hiding like that.”
“Maybe she’d like to play with my child-“
Rueful pesky whispers. That’s all he heard.
Jake didn’t speak. He didn’t raise his voice or even make a sound.
He places his hand on her shoulder, rubbing his hand up and down her back like that day all those years ago  under the shade.
Jake would always be your shade.
Your sanctuary for your shadow.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*
The festival raged on below.
You were currently a bundle of nerves as it is.
You had lost Spider and Lo’ak in the crowd and retreated to one of the higher hills to search for them.
You'd think plucking them out of a sea of faces would be second nature, but no, your boys fancied the self of one-sided hide-and-go-seek.
Spider and Lo’ak were your clouds. The radical rebellion within a rain storm. And as you tried to dish out a shimmering reflection off of spiders mask that protected him from the unwelcoming atmosphere of the jungle, the sky grew darker and darker. Laughter run through the air, the fire accentuating features of those who danced with the flames and sang with the embers.
You didn’t hate people. That was a common misconception about you. 
You preferred plants to people, because one didn’t talk nearly as much as the other, and the stories within the roots and water, droplets weren’t as near as overbearing as the burdening shrills of overbearing questions. I’m nights like these were the clan gathered in large groups you would sit alone in a tree with  Spider and Lo’ak. You talked about everything you were going to do the secret and stars were going to steal for one another. 
On occasion, you talked to Spider about Neteyam. 
How do you fear this barricaded wall you’ve built around yourself was going to turn into something he could never climb. That may be this archer you dreamed of was simply out of your grasp. You dreamed of him as the sky struck midnight in the colors in the clouds, concealing the world of a shadow you dwelled in. 
Spider and Lo’ak made hesitance and patience deem itself as something worth only for baiting you into good behavior. That he would slip from your grass, that your life with slip away in a blink if you didn’t go and kiss him as the mere second. 
Nights were filled of him.
His eyes, a paradox of the golden hour. His strong figures sculpted like mountains, his words that painted the sky in the sea. 
He wondered if he tasted like sunlight and wind, if his lips were as gently roughed-edged and honed as his voice.
Or if when you touched him, the last salvageable stretches of the sunset would disappear under your lips. And you would return to recycled versions of his lingering touches..  
You loved him. You truly, truly loved him.
And what would the sullys think? His parents? His siblings?
You owed everything to them.
They didn’t have to take you in after your mother passed. 
Lo’ak was your fire. Neteyam was your sun. Kiri was your Venus. Tuk was your star. Jake was your wind. Neytiri was your mountain. Spider was your cloud.
But you? You were a shadow.
Finding your voice became more difficult as a child. 
This shyness, this shadow, this ‘anxiety’ as Jake called it.
This thing. This monster. 
Made out of  shadows and secrets and pesky loud whispers.
It’s tall with limbs like sticks.
It’s chained to your wrist like an unwanted prisoner. 
It sends strokes of dread down your back.
And it haunted you.
When you longed for Neteyam, but this chain around your wrist kept its barricade of darkness.
Even as a child.
You were a little voice who others assumed only cried for help. 
When you tugged on Neytiri’s waistband, gently signaling you were uncomfortable, when you hid behind Jake’s leg from prying eyes.
How a small Lo’ak followed you around, looked at you like you held the universe in your hands, you were his big sister. How you chewed on your lower lip, nervously holding Jake’s hand while Lo’ak clung to your arm.
How his fire and your shadow caused a collision within the Sully family, beautifully inharmonious chaos. 
You loved Lo’ak. But Lo’ak was your brother.
The closest thing you would have to a brother in this lifetime.
You longed for Neteyams sunlight.
You were a shadow.
Shadows didn���t belong in the light.
Much less to fall in love with it.
To lay beneath his soul, to feel the connection. It’ll always be there. Casting a shadow.
A starless night.
Oh how you longed for moonlight.
You peered down below, your gaze tugged away from your mission to find your two idiots.
You're lost in the beauty of the Omaticaya, people danced in their traditional garb, the drums ruminate through the thick air, and you swore it was the heartbeats of your people.
The fire and the night sky was a beautiful collision dancing off of azure skin.
Then. The rain returns.
“Y/n? Whatcha doing here all alone?”
No. No no no no no.
You whip around to see Kxa’nan.
Your breath leaves you in a soft surge of panic.
“You're always alone. I barely ever hear you talk, yawne. Need some company?”
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
 Neteyam was helping his dad cook the fish he hunted earlier over the fire, Neytiri and Kiri assisting with the spices and herbs.
Lo’ak was missing from the picture, nowhere to be seen the whole night since the celebration started.
“Where is your brother?
Neytiri asked, letting Tuk perch herself in her former spot next to Jake.
“You haven’t seen him?”
 Neteyams eyebrows raise. 
“Was he with Y/n and spider?”
 Tuk lifts her head over Jake’s shoulder.
Neytiri, more than displeased at the mention of the human boy, but concern for Lo’ak and protectiveness over Y/m arose.
“Was she with the sky boy and Lo’ak earlier? They went with the foraging group today-
Tuktirey. Stop poking at the dead fish.”
“Sorry mama.”
As if on cue, Lo’ak and spider entered the small tent.
“Lo’ak!”
Neytiri placed her hand on her son’s shoulder.
He was out of breath, looked like he just ran around the entire forest.
“Where’s Y/n?”
He asked in a short gasp.
Jake, now concerned stood to his feet.
“Y/n? Where did you come from, Lo’ak?”
“The festival? I dunno-
I can’t find her. And she hates big crowds like these. Spider had to go back to the lab to get a new mask on short notice, there’s no one with her.”
Tuk giggles.
“Lo’ak was probably too busy dancing with a girl…”
Jake’s eyebrows crinkled.
Neteyam stood at his feet as well.
He left the tent and set off to find you.
He searched the celebration, pushed past the embers and smoke, the thick air of peoples dancing and the sounds of laughter.
On a hill, a little ways off. Two shadows come into view.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
“Kxa’nan..I wish to be alone.”
Kxa’nan groaned at your words.
“Your’e always alone, or you’re hanging out with those two freaks.”
Your shadow dissipates for a moment, anger simmered beneath your skin.
“Lo’ak and Spider aren’t freaks-
don’t talk about them like that.”
Kxa’nan scoffs and your left unhooded with no shadow at all for a moment.
“Don’t laugh. You’re the one always having a pissing race with Neteyam.
Maybe if you aimed your arrow  as good as you flexed your non-existent muscles, there’d be nothing to say.”
He hissed at you and grabbed your arm. Being compared to Neteyam was a jab.
A small wince contorted your features, you gasped.
A flash of lights invades both your visions, and a strong arm is wrapped around your waist, a familiar touch, a circle of safety. 
A familiar azure skinned archer appears beside you, a protective shield of a glare at Kxa’nan.
“Don’t touch her. Ever. Again.”
Kxa’nan scoffs, but a fortification of fear embeds itself In his eyes. Clearly intimidated by Neteyam’s presence.
Kxa’nan glares at you, unhappy with your savior and his impeccable timing.
His eyes flare yellow. Not a soft golden hour like Neteyam’s. No, and even in a clan where all your eyes share the same tint. At the moment this is a sickening shade of yellow. It flares so brightly you thin your eyes to look away.  Your breath hitches in your throat and your voice hides behind the threat of thought.
Neteyam takes a step forward and pushes him away, shielding you from his gaze.
His deep voice honed itself as a rougher edge.
“Don’t look at her.
Look at me.
Don’t come near her again. Got it?”
Lo’ak and spider come into view from behind a few trees.
“Hey! Get away from them. Back it up!”
 Spider’s small figure appears much less intimidating then the Sully brothers. But he remains grounded to protect you. 
“What the fuck did I tell you?”
Lo’ak grab’s Kxa’nan by his bicep roughly.
“Don’t bother her. And what did you do?”
Kxa’nan glares at you and your four tyrants.
“Y/n, did you really have to bring this whole freak show family with you?”
He bites.
There’s a beat of silence.
And then, Lo’aks fist collides with Kxa’nan’s jaw, hot, red liquid pools from his mouth.
“It’s called a punch, Bitch! Don’t ever touch my sister again.”
Kxa’nan tackles Lo’ak, and Spider body slams the Na’vi.
Tapping his elbow before placing his other hand on his bicep and flinging himself, jabbing Kxa’nan in the ribs with his elbow.
Jake emerged from a few trees away, groaning and trying to grab his son before shit actually got heavy.
Jake places a lingering touch on your arm to make sure you were safe,
Jake drags Lo’ak up by his arm, grabbing spider by his waist.
Spider explains the predicament, and Jake angrily drags Kxa’nan away to be dealt with.
No one messes with his kids.
Lo’ak wiggles his eyebrows at Neteyam, who’s held you close to him this whole time.
And then.
You’re alone.
Neteyam turns to you, his fingers dragging down your cheeks gently.
“Are you alright? Did he hurt you? Talk to me, please..”
Gently cradling your face in the cup of his palms. 
A fire alights beneath your skin.
“I’m fine, Nete…he just made me…uncomfortable..”
There’s silence. 7 beats worth.
“How long has he been bothering you?”
Your voice peaks from behind your barricade.
“Awhile…”
“You never came to me, you never told me. Y/n I will always protect you. Why didn’t you come to me?”
 His voice was a labyrinth of desperation clinging to hope.
“I’m sorry..”
It’s a small fragile whisper.
And most protect fragile things.
Neteyam gently drags his hands down your neck, another hand gently tracing your rib cage.
“I don’t want an apology. I want you to know that I care for you. So deeply, Y/n.”
Is there another universe out there where I can spare you the pain of love?
Longing for someone so desperately you fear they’ll become aflame under your touch.
Does he taste like fire?
Is the plush of your skin sculpted from shadows?
This love was a painting you never had the courage to count the colors, in fear they would flurry away.
In this fortress of his arms, in this circle of sunlight, in this last surviving stretch of a sunset, there’s a flare.
Neteyam gives to others only to deny himself.
You reach for something made of glass only to see it shatter again.
But not here.
Not now.
You whisper hoarsely as his hands cradle your face.
“I don’t like big crowds.”
He smiles and kisses your nose.
“Then neither do I.”
The two of you sit there, under the canopy of the trees, watching the stars. 
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
Your head laid on his chest, the only music you two needed was the sound of your intertwining heartbeats.
You traced the lines on his palms, and he kissed your cheek.
Soft whispers and lingering gazes.
“What’s your favorite star?”
You ask him.
You.
He wants to say, but he holds his tounge. Eyes scanning the sky for the perfect star to satisfy your curiosity.
“That one.”
He points to one, it’s in the midst of a cluster of scattered flurries of white specks.
You leaned into his shoulder, his hand gently cupping the back of your head.
“What would happen if they started falling?”
“I’d catch them for you.”
You chuckled at his answer.
He closes his eyes and basks in the aubade of your laughter.
Your soul, gentle semblances of beauty in the space behind the sun.
Love is a sacrificial abstraction. He sees you in signposts and circles, and parallel lines.
Another beat of silence passes.
“Y/n.”
He breaths your name, dragging his finger along your pulse point.
You hear music in the distance.
Not the drums of the Omaticaya, or the flutes of your people.
You peer down over the hill and see two figures slow dancing to a radio in the family Marui.
Neytiris giggles are gently heard as the silhouette of her and Jake dancing comes into view.
You sighed in contentment. Sometimes, you, Neteyam, Kiri and Lo’ak would spy on them behind the tent flap. Observing them dance, Jake teaching her the way people dance on earth.
Neteyam smiles as well.
“I love it when they do that…”
You lean into his shoulder, and he finds himself lost in your eyes once again.
He wishes he could give you the whole world. A place where you can disregard burdens of reality, be tangled with her pages and plants, gardens made of clouds, and laughter, where you can trace the in patterns of her favorite flower, where you can touch the consolation within isolation. It is not loneliness you desire, you don't want the fixation of the introspection within your shadow.
Neteyam stands you both to your feet, Jake’s music dwells in the night air, the stars seem to twinkle in perfect rhythm.
“Neteyam, what are we doing?”
You laugh.
“Dancing, come yawne.
Put your hands here, and my hand goes-“
He pauses before placing his hand on your lower waist, just like he saw his father do.
“May I?”
You nod.
Before you can blink, he sways you with the music, you laugh and avoid stepping on his toes
For a moment, the shadows disappear. The sun burns out. It’s no longer so bright you are forced to shy away to the dark.
Custom, reason, temptation, it all fades behind the stars.
The moonlight traces his figure as you dance, the stars reminisce in your eyes.
You were composed of stories.
Captivating, euphonious stories. 
The same stories that you cradled in your pals when you held your plants.
Your souls dance but your gazes remain still.
He gently cups your face in his hands, lifting your chin.
“I see you, Y/n. I have never seen anyone but you, beautiful…”
Your breath hitches.
“I see you, Neteyam. I’ve always seen you..”
When you kiss him, the shadows and the sunlight collide, and soft gasps and and tangible emotions are torn. 
There is no barricade.
The distance was only ever created because distance was safe.
But you don’t want distance.
Neither does he.
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
He lays you down on the soft bed of grass, he yearns to kiss every inch of you from your hairline to your ankles.
“Y/n, oh my Y/n…my beautiful, beautiful y/n.”
He whispers your name like a mantra, as if you would wither away into the shadows again if he didn’t pray your name.
Your gasps serenaded him.
Your hands tugged on his braids as he kissed your neck,
“What do you wish for me to do, yawne? Speak for me, my good girl..”
Your leg wrapped around his hip. You couldn’t help but buck into him.
Love like this only haunts you with light that once existed behind the shadow, the one that surfaced behind the sun.
Eclipse is near.
He unraveled you like the universe was beneath your top and loincloth, stroking you with gentle drags of his thumb, his strong arm hooked under your thigh.
“Neteyam-
Eywa please…”
You begged for him to soothe the aching heat
“Shhh. It’s okay, my sweet girl. I’m right here…just keep looking up at those pretty stars. The stars are yours, my love,
Fuck-
Everything, the sky, the sun, the oceans, the shadows they’re all yours, my love. So am I.”
He reached around for his braid and you followed suit. 
You both stared into eachothers eyes. The pools of honeyed golden hour beneath the moon.
The sweet nectar dripping down your thighs, your curves traced by his touch,
“Tsaheylu, Neteyam..please.”
Who was he to deny you?
And as you connected the stars fell.
A flurry of colors, a blur of ecstasy, straddled, kissed, caressed, explored.
The drapes of the moonlight bathing you.
Every coherent thought withered into a static of white, 
This wasn’t sex. This wasn’t one body entering another for pleasure. This was a soul finding it’s flame.
He begged the deity to never take his shadow away.
“Do you feel it y/n, it’s always been there..I’ve always been here..don’t hide from me again.”
His rough accent voice honed your ears, his nose dragging along your pulse point, you whined in response. 
The heat faded away, tranquility returned.
He kissed you, your chin, your lips, your hair, thank you’s and praises whispered as his string arms encircled you.
You laid on his chest, and you faintly hear him whisper 
“I think it’s finally eclipse…”
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
-Sunofpandora
2023
“Diaphanous” 
Tag list:
@neteyamsoare
@yeosxxx
@lianna75
@jackiehollanderr
@6423btw
✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄*ੈ✩✧ ೃ༄
Im SCREAMING right now.
Im super insecure in writing smut but i kinda wanted to try it? It's not really smut tbh just like…really intimate?
Idk.
But I struggled with this fr. Writers block ate me up.
So idk how good this is. Sorry 😭
I hope everyone enjoyed. That request box is gonna be open in the next few weeks but I might be a bit busy so there might be a bit of a wait.
I wanted to include some parallels from the movie, and some references to Jake and Neytiri through Neteyam and Y/n, so I hope everyone caught those. 
I hoped you enjoyed “diaphanous” 🌀🪐
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jesncin · 4 months ago
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making my way through YJa so I can get to the Ma'al and martian stuff again but adfasdf things I have to say:
good things first: I love Victor's backstory, the voice actor is absolutely giving it his all. Great performances in the Stone family. The Accident was rendered so gorey and gross that it was hard to look at and I even involuntarily cried a bit.
The first few episodes of S3 are the strongest the show has been so far even if it's not as ambitious as previous seasons. The cast is way less bloated and they're taking time to introduce new characters to us.
bad things: M'gann calling the meta teens they essentially adopted "needy"?? god I'm not trying to hate her but what the heck? Brion is a banished prince and recently discovered he's a meta human, Halo is a traffic-ed teen, Forager was banished from his home planet (something M'gann should understand??) but no. They're needy for getting in the way of her and Conner's engagement era. It's not like they're struggling financially and don't have the space to take in strays. It's not like any of them are taking a break from being heroes. One of my least favorite tropes in Superhero stories is when an adult character is entitled to their superhero partner/friend's time when they should understand that said superhero is busy saving lives and is in urgent need. Yeah it sucks when you miss out on a date or two but being a hero is about that personal sacrifice. It's not like M'gann's a normie either! She's a super and should get it. "Aah but they should spend Engagement time together" Conner and M'gann are ageless beings in this show, they've got time! Argh. Hate it.
Beast Boy's episode is when the show falls back on its over-exposition weakness. Way too much told to us instead of shown.
There's probably going to be more reveals on Halo's backstory eventually but the current reveal I'm on where it turns out the motherbox device basically "possesses" this human girl's body and now lives through her? I don't like it. This alien technology took over a hijabi girl's body but still chooses to wear the hijab. It feels like getting muslim representation on a surface level but by removing all of the religious and cultural context out of wearing a hijab. How does the motherbox know that men shouldn't be around when she takes her hijab off? Especially when Halo has been so Born Sexy Yesterday clueless about how to be human this whole time?
Halo and Brion are too much of a retread of M'gann and Conner. Would've been more interesting if their genders were swapped or something.
It's getting a bit gratuitous how many times they're fake-killing or injuring Halo. I get it, they're showcasing her powers and ability to come back from the dead. But when it's mostly POC who are at the receiving end of the show's upgraded violence it starts getting icky.
I praised this show for pronouncing Ra's Al Ghul's name correctly in S1 and S2 but why are they changing the pronunciation in S3? ;_; yall were doing so well
it doesn't matter I'm still coming for you Ma'al
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cursecuelebre · 6 months ago
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All about me!
I just feel like it’s time to put a little post about me!
My name is Ashlyn and I’m from New England America, my pronouns are She/Her ~ Age is 22 - I am bisexual ~ Neurodivergent
I’m a pagan and a witch based upon my ancestry, Hellenic polytheism and Norse/Germanic paganism and witchcraft.
I’m mostly started out as a tarot reader then became a witch and a pagan, I practice mostly folk magic and Ancestral Magic. Right now trying to find a traditional magic practice. I do a lot of knot magic and needle work presently.
My guardian animal: I don’t know if that’s the correct term but Bears 🐻, I always had dreams/nightmares about bears since I was little and when I did a tarot reading on what my familiar spirit is the bear came up.
Why I started this blog?
I guess the main reasons to keep a digital record of my experiences, thoughts, lessons, etc. to share my experiences so I thought maybe it can help people find what they are looking for and learn about it. Also a chance for me to learn about other people’s perspectives and ideas. I’m always open to learn more and share more information the best I can.
Also I like to swear in my blogs because I like to, I don’t do it excessively but it’s prevalent if you aren’t comfortable with it.
My hobbies!
I read a lot. Not just one subject, Fantasy, Fiction, Historical fiction, Non-Fiction, and Classics. I might post some book reviews and recommendations on this blog. My favorite book is LOTR it’s my cozy and feel good book, Tolkien also had a lot of pagan inspiration for his stories.
I also write! Short stories to writing long stories about whatever comes to mind. I write fantasy and historical fiction, but also horror and thriller. At times I write poetry. Sometimes when I’m bored use my tarot for a creative writing project.
I like to do crafts. Especially when it comes to paganism and witchcraft. I sew and embroidered poppets, sigils, or symbols. I wouldn’t say I’m neat with a thread and needle but I get the job done.
Video Games I love Halo, Skyrim, Fallout, AC Valhalla and Odyssey, Animal Crossing, Red Dead Redemption.
Hiking and Foraging in nature
Witchcraft and Tarot cards (obviously)
My Likes!
Season: Autumn
Holiday: Yule/Saturnalia
Music: Anything that sounds good to me: Right now Opera is my most listen to. From Opera to Oldies to Folk music to Heavy Metal to Pop songs. R&B is a guilty pleasure of mine and a couple of rappers and hiphop artists. So again I kinda like everything.
Animals: I love cats I have three of my own, Rabbits, Squirrels, Deer, Horses, Bears, Ravens. I like any animals but those I wanna say are my top ones 😂
Insects: don’t necessarily like them but spiders and moths are pretty neat, but Honeybees or bees in general are my favorite they’re quite special to me. Hopefully one day I start beekeeping.
TV Shows: Penny Dreadful was amazing if you like dark horror, witchcraft, in a Victorian setting that incorporates a lot of classic horror stories like Frankenstein and Dracula highly recommended it with Eva Green and Helen McCoy. I don’t have a favorite movies or tv shows definitely but Legion, LOTR, Immortals, Harry Potter movies, the show Vikings. Are great and anything like it just 🤌
ASMR/Meditation ambiences
Smell of burning wood
Tarot cards and reading and finding anything that I can do with them that is new
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tieflingfingers · 5 months ago
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What and who: Astarion tries his first attempt at close quarters. Thomasin isn't happy about it. Summary: Thomasin awakes to find a silhouette hovering over her. Between blades, blood, and bickering, Astarion tries to find a way to feed himself without breaking the mild trust they have. Warning/Content: Re-write of first bite scene, character lore, and Astarion character study. Adjacent to horror/angst/humor/the seed planting of fluff. Vague mentions of abuse/trauma. Part of campaign remix, but can also be read as one-off. Word Count: 4,925 Ao3 Link
In the depths of the Dales, where agriculture and pillagers roamed free, lived a forbidden courtship. Proof of peace and harmony sprout from its bud. It was the birth of a child. One whose cheeks were pink and supple like her human mother. Like her mother before her and those before them. Skin stained shades of raspberry as though she, too, was grown from the same acre of land. Soil rich enough to build a lineage of women feminine yet sturdy. 
Paternal instincts didn’t come naturally to the infant’s father, but not out of his own volition. He was a drow softer than the Underdark would foster. Intimacy was prohibited. The gentle touch of sun-warmed flesh even more so. Only a handful of meetings left a legacy he’d never know. A daughter bathing in light not afforded to him whilst he was swept back underground.
But, living on farmland proved rich with experience. The child braided ribbons into her hair to keep strands out of her eyes while tending crops. Hours under the sun left imprints on her skin that mirrored her mother. Skin decorated by a labor of love. Speckled and peachy against silver tints.
"There’s so much to see in every plane, Thomasin,” her mother interjected between lullabies.
Perhaps her parents were both stricken by their own nagging wanderlust. Thomasin heard countless stories of travels beyond her young comprehension. Stories of a drow that defied Lolth. Not by mighty bloodshed, but a gentle demeanor. The defiance of a man wanting nothing more than freedom. Details that were mulled over so often, he began to feel more like a fairytale. His character evolved with the human’s fallible memory.
Some evenings, the drow was heroic against his raiding caravan. Other times, he simply was a man whose fingers ached for acceptance. All of it, all of him, muddled together, fed Thomasin like breadcrumbs. They were memories she could cling to, even if he existed only through anecdotes and physical letters left behind. He was folklore.
-
Lifetimes away from her original roots, Thomasin became the conduit of their dreams. She’d witness the vastness of their plane. Places where adventures never ended. But, her mother never truly warned of life’s woes. How merciless it could be, even when fruitful.
Thomasin spent the evening concocting medicinal magic. They were common procedural spells that ward off inflammation and voided the need of stitches. As content as her new companions were, it wore the half-elf down, and so she retired to her tent earlier than the others.
It wasn’t long until she was tucked away underneath a makeshift blanket. Sleep hadn’t always come naturally, so she took advantage of exhaustion. Her dark hair sprawled around her head like a halo, strands entwined and unfurled from restless slumber. But, no matter how hard she tried, her mind remained partially tuned in to life outside her tent.
Thankfully, it was nothing more than banter around a campfire. They rejoiced in comradery fueled by dinner whose foundation was primarily red wine. It eased tension. Let their playful jabs and jokes wash off their backs. This possibility of protection comforted the half-elf a bit.
So, Thomasin remained in her nest. At forty-five years of age, she figured fatigue stemmed from her human half. The same that made her frame worn yet strong. Travel brought city inclines, grassy hills, and crouching through thistle in the name of foraging. But, no matter how much she pushed herself, she was constantly decorated. 
Easy on the eyes. It was a habit, more than anything. A default state of being.
Curated fashions were collected over years. Gifted, stolen, sewn, swapped, and saved. Pigments made cheeks looked pinched and sparkles smeared over scars from unfortunate scraps. Her hips were wide when seasonal harvests were plentiful. Her posture bordered between straight and feminine. It was as though every aspect of her persona had been created from decades of standing in front of a mirror.
Starting this new journey, as involuntary as it may be, she was thankful for what piece of home she carried. The belongings of an abandoned home still packed in her bag after getting abducted by mind flayers. Scarves made of fine stolen silk, whose weave snagged. Books with split bindings lovingly re-bound by bundling pages until whole once more. Their contents ranged from fictional anthologies to sappy romance to guides of edible flora.
Residing next to potions, bottled perfumes soaked into cork tops. Her violin slept in the corner. Its body had been as plucked, popped, and rewound as hers. Simple blessings.
Eventually, noises dwindled. Those outside finally laid to sleep. The forest began to rustle louder, as though it had been waiting for their commotion to cease. To be able to exist in its most natural state. It harmonized. Branches creaked and native berries were plucked by gusts of wind. Whenever the unknown awoke Thomasin, she reminded herself of her mother’s saying.
“We are a guest to nature. The nocturnal world has always lived with us, just as the light does."
What she lacked to consider, was the nocturnal entering her den.
Cast shadows were almost tactile in their density, hovering atop her skin. An ever faint sensation. One that resurfaced her hypervigilance born from syndicates. And, for a split second, she caught a glimpse of the greyed silhouette above.
Dread set in.
Before her was a tale as old as time.
Domineering men proving she was just consumable company.
There was no hesitation in her reflexes. No need to identify who it was. No time. Words fled from her lips in rapid succession. The spell, readily accessible, flowed from an unnatural tongue. It was a series of broken common, deep, and high drow. Unintelligible horrific statements. The whispers trickled in a river of flowing smoke, its blue haze snaking its way into the figure’s skull.
As the weave infiltrated their thoughts, it illuminated streams that spilled down the planes of their face. Down their cheeks like painful tears and pouring from an agape mouth as though squeezing the last remnants of a well’s ground reserves. 
In a full blown panic, the figure gasped. Thomasin wouldn’t prolong the forced terror, but she knew even a single second of torment felt like hours. The pressure entangled within her foe’s temples and dragged its ephemeral claws around an already battered brain.
Out into the moonlight, Astarion stumbled from the mouth of her tent. He had flung himself backward, landing square on his palms. He stared back at Thomasin, but it was apparent he was still recovering from the sudden retaliation. He appeared disillusioned. Frightened in a way that made her uncomfortable.
Thomasin scuttled to the entrance with ragged breath. A small dagger embedded so deep within her fist, her knuckles grew white and sharp. Although her blade had become a beacon of last resort rather than an eager desire. Chips and wear along its metal mumbled its victims, but that couldn’t defy the obvious shaking of her hands and the memories of every time she’d fallen victim, herself.
In the darkness, the light from her cryptic illusions mellowed until both elves peered at one another in shades of livid grey. Before her, Astarion was shivering in place. Jaw slackened and back hunched. He knew he had to simply endure. Magical cruelty was unyielding, but the clutches of the Weave always dissolved before he did. 
Thomasin recognized her chance to approach. Survey the feigning of undeath she figured he existed within. His humanity, stunted. Stagnant. She peeked her head out further like a writhing animal curious about a writhing beast. As though her quills plunging him into fright was an act of wry mercy. 
Astarion’s knuckles appeared speckled in shades of bruised plum. Its fruit’s tender exterior tumbled, prodded, and thudded against the dirt before truly ripening. His heavy breath revealed the sheer discomfort his posture took to maintain. It was as though his frame ached under the weight of its growing hunger. They were wordless pleas of pangs. Pains of a pallid complexion.
Eventually, Astarion melted into his body once more. Pupils no longer dilated and dissociative. No longer forlorn. As his fingers eased from their strained grip into the grass, his gaze flicked back up to hers. It reeked of exhausted predation.
“Gods—shit,” he muttered. “It’s not–”
Thomasin’s intuition begged for civility. Her history beckoned her to protect herself through any means necessary. It boiled to a froth from her gut. Words clamored to be free, vitriolic in her throat. Syllables bashed against her teeth. But, she ground them down until the unbridled anger condensed into something meek. Uncharacteristically so. 
“Astarion- Please. You promised,” Thomasin whispered.
His eyes trailed down to the dagger she still held tight. 
“You don’t have to use that. Blades among friends is never the answer, honestly” His voice cracked. “An old-hat solution. Passé, even.” 
“I-” She looked around the camp with bleary eyes. It was still. Oblivious in each tent’s drunken slumber. “Is this from all that dessert wine you found? Fucking hells- you have ten seconds to plead before I wake the others.”
“Ten seconds?” The elf swallowed his distress, struggling to smooth its ridges with his usual temperament. “Going back on a promise?  I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I’m not some kind of- oh, I don’t know.” His hand twisted about in the air in search of answers. “A ne’er-do-well? I thought we were better acquainted than that.” 
His lilt was slithering back into his grasp. He even let out a light titter.
“Thomasin. Darling. You’re beautiful, but I am no ill-intentioned monster.
Astarion shifted to tend to the impact upon his wrists, wringing his hands around sore joints. Thomasin watched him repress every line of dialogue that would fail to placate her. But, there was overcompensation in his eyes. After their tumultuous days, little strength was left to press down the fatigue he forcibly polished like an ever rotating stone wheel. He was stuck with the excess. Nothing but powdered iron and rust.
The elf’s ears drooped at the unnerving silence between them. He caught her hesitance. But, even her reluctance to strike couldn’t mask the sheer adrenaline coursing through her. And before he knew it,  Astarion found himself pulled by his linen shirt collar.
His back slammed against crackling wicker. It was the mat flooring of her tent. Wavering between fragility and disorientation, he found himself straddled and pinned by the half-elf’s knees. One restrained his forearm whilst the other dug into his open palm. His fingers curled under the crushing weight.
“Absolute bitch- I need that!” Astarion hushed himself, but not before hissing through his teeth. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.”
Next was the fine point of a dagger nestled between his jawline and jugular. Any quick movements would prove deadly to Astarion, if he wasn’t careful, but the act of unrelenting threat grew muddled. It wasn’t her voice that faltered. Nor her commitment. It was the droplets that hit the elf’s face under her. Gravity pulling what laid along her lashline with little consent.
“What were you thinking? Sneaking up on me? Inside my tent? I wanted to consider you more than some… tawdry dandy… The lack of tact. I’m not afraid to end you where you lay, you know. Those weren’t falsehoods I spoke of.”
“Wait- There are few things I have a difficult time wording,” Astarion uttered. “Nothing awful, terrible, of course. I wouldn’t dare ruin the company we keep. Sometimes actions are more via–”
The microscopic tilt of Thomasin’s hand shoved the blade deeper against his neck, cutting shallow within the flesh. She was terrified, but couldn’t allow herself to voice it. Every word of his tasted like milk and honey. If only there weren’t gall in his heart and fraud in his deeds.
Astarion gasped and pulled his shoulders upward as though he could make distance between them. “Ah! Easy there. No need to spur a horse going full speed. Listen-”
A huff jut from his nostrils. His eyes closed to shield himself from the consequences. Each sentence raced behind the next, detailing the confession that finally caught up with him. The reason for his comeuppance. 
“You remember that ghastly sight we saw on our walk earlier? That hog . You remember the one, yes? The one with those curious little wounds on his neck.” A weak laugh fluttered out, making the wound sting more. “Exsanguinated. Perhaps… the stories of creatures going bump in the night aren’t entirely as they seem. That-Perhaps… Perhaps! Just maybe, vampire spawn live amongst you just as your peers.”
Astarion opened his eyes to witness her reaction, although it was not as extravagant as he expected. It was quiet contemplation wracked with desires. For mercy. Possible bloodshed to solve it all.
After years of prowling, he was left to his own devices. No masters or gods to tell the elf what to do or how to act. No higher powers to blame. No scripts for the circumstance. No one to pick up the pieces.
“I could have guessed as much,” she finally spoke up. “You lack subtlety, I fear.”
“Look. I won’t be saccharine about all of this. I am not in this state of being out of choice . I-There are powerful people in Baldur’s Gate, you know this. Cazador resides in the high mansions of the city, maintaining his control through slavery. I was only lucky to be plucked from his clutches.” 
The muscles in his face struggled to maintain a calm. His dignity, visibly pained.
She paused, recognizing the name from word of mouth. The rare occasions she associated with the upper echelon, where her escorting brought forth gifts of fresh seafood, fresher furs, and the freshest hearsay. She was suddenly grateful she’d never accepted invitations to the grand castle in the sky.
“Do you survive off animals?” she asked.
“Typically, yes. I’ve existed under strict rules for as long as I’ve been riddled with this disease.” 
He averted his eyes and recalled the list of his master:
“‘First, thou shalt not drink the blood of thinking creatures.
Second, thou shalt obey me in all things.
Third, thou shalt not leave my side unless directed.
Four, thou shalt know that thou art mine.’”
Astarion’s glanced and lit up at the sight of her expression softening.
“Though… quenching my thirst has proven difficult out here, “ he continued. “Every day I grow weaker. It gets more and more difficult to fight beside you all and hide such ailments. Aha… Color me… desperate.” The admission was bitter to taste.
Thomasin unsheathed the blade’s tip and pressed her thumb against Astarion’s wound. The gentle touch did not heal, but rather pondered over the damage. It was a souvenir of who she once was.
Astarion didn’t let his guard down further. He couldn’t. She had no reason to spare him the quickened death of a dagger through his chest. The obvious answer was self-preservation. Yet, she was suddenly tender, despite her weight heavy atop him. He let out a weak laugh. The reality was, he was still alive.
“Vampirism seems to have an odd relationship to the city streets,” Thomasin said. “I came across your kind every so often, but rarely did we speak. I imagine murdering the harlots would put a damper on your ability to blend into flophouses…” She grabbed his jaw, turning his face to assess the gnarled scar on his neck. The trauma of a blistering bite. Under it was an elf he once was. “I suppose part of me wanted to encourage whatever humanity is left inside you.”
“I… Well…” he mumbled, uncertain the comments called for offense or flattery.
“...Did you want to feed off me?”
He inhaled sharp, nodding his head in her clutches. “Yes! Yes, I would, very much so. Not a drop more than you are willing, of course .”
“Will… I turn?”
“No, I am merely a spawn. Transforming you into some thrall isn’t in my…  vampiric wheelhouse.”
Thomsin felt coziness in the unconventional path. Dangers were plentiful and often more perilous than the man sitting before her. What was more indulgent than snake oil? The grey morals that provide true, unfiltered respite. The enticement of taboo relief. A thought that would later morph into regret if she didn’t take the chance. She yearned to finally relax. To finally feel something. Or nothing. Anything.
Although she’d never admit it to herself.
After short deliberation, the half-elf freed Astarion and positioned herself beside him. A shaking hand tucked her weapon back into its sheath. Her knees pulled into her chest. And, as she was about to consent, a noise escaped her throat. A whimper. Biology voicing its disapproval.
“Ah-What should I do?” she whispered.
“Just… let me take the lead. You sit pretty.”
Astarion sat up and gathered what energy he had left. He groaned and articulated his fingers, instructing his limbs to cooperate once more. Gradually, he oriented himself behind her with a slow stalking grace and encouraged her shoulders to rest against his chest.
It was as though a spark livened him. Not a sensation of excitement from pocketing coins or fulfilling lewd fantasies. This felt different. The vampire never had the luxury of an artery so willing and gifted. Wrapped in a bow, so to speak. Yet, he had an epiphany. 
Every fiber of his being had subconsciously prepared itself for another death. His master professed this fate. He could already hear the joyous cackling Cazador would make upon finding his withering starved body in the forest. It was everything he promised upon escape.
Even if he wished to disobey, Astarion had never fed upon a victim nor been taught to. Rodents' bodies were compact, whereas living speaking anatomy had nuance. In fact, he’d only witnessed feasts from a distance with palpable envy. One could recall wounds, but where would be best to bite? How could he ensure she was preserved, leeching life without the inevitable corpse on his hands?
Astarion proceeded to mimic those dining in the halls of his home. The decorum was different, but that wouldn’t matter. The elf proceeded to wrap an arm around her waist for support and gently brushed aside long strands of hair. They ran down her clavicle like a cascading curtain, revealing her neck.
"How much will it hurt?" she asked. 
Seconds went by. No answer. He was enamored by the mere concept of a meal. Stone still, ferality awoke within his brain, although he eventually snapped back into reality. He felt like a starving animal careening toward rats for sustenance. He was.
"It's only a pinch. A nick. Just…” His words trailed off, voice low and heavy. “Just relax yourself against me. I'll keep you steady.”
"What if you go on a count? I breathe in and out a few times?”
“Sure- Yes. Let us count.”
There was impatience in his tone being strangled. The elf was fueled by tunnel vision. Unshackled hedonism. Still, he played along.
“One.” 
“Two.”
And not a syllable more. 
Thomasin’s flesh being punctured felt like the hissing of an unkempt fire. Dried kindling snapping and sparking against moisture in the air. She yelped. The wound in her neck pulsated in a way she'd never experienced, uncomfortable and siphoned. Excitement of the unknown had all but culminated into panic.
But, if there was one about the half-elf, it was that she was stubborn. Her nails dug into his shirt, pawing at the linens for his cold embrace. They searched for any semblance of safety. Through creases and cuffed folds, they landed at his wrist and etched a codex into his skin.
Astarion's body began to writhe against her in pure intoxication. With his hand guiding her head, he rose to a kneeling position, fulling taking control of the dance macabre. The footwork proved messy, but style was far from his mind. Never had the finer tastes in life been so abundant. Every sense was sharpening. Every emotion, ecstatic. 
The elf’s eyes had nearly glazed over until a pain brought him back. It was Thomasin’s nails. He realized her composure was crumbling.
"Keep counting, love,” he managed through a tongue coated in the blackened blood pooling at his lips.
Diving back into her neck once more, Thomasin finally let go. The pain that once seized her neutralized. What now resided was a bloodless calm. Their hearts raced at uneven beats, momentarily syncing until they passed one another. Hers slowing whilst his engorged with borrowed life. He ventured into an aggravated fervor at the expense of a bard’s descent into the dirt. The oozing ebb and flow of building delirium. An amalgamation of every misstep and the bottles of whiskey that couldn’t quite wrap them in creature comforts.
She did as she was told and crept into a languid submission, head rolling any way his body contorted hers. 
Back to counting. 
Two. Three. Four.
The numbers coinciding felt more like concepts than measurements.
Five. Six. Seven.
Internal dialogues began to devolve. Abstraction. It washed over her. Abrupt and startling like tumbling into a cold lake. Although its cool waters rejuvenated where her soil never knew rain. Repose began to blossom.
Eight. Nine. Ten.
Thomasin clutched onto him as a safety net. She ran her fingers along his shirt. They trailed over every stitch, discovering mending he’d sewn by hand. Bumps and valleys. 
By now, the sounds of his neglected appetite were fading into the ether. Numbers had lost meaning and she had to find new ways to remain grounded. First, it was the threads. Then, the slowing repetition of her heartbeat. They were the last ways of documenting how unsubstantial seconds passed by.
Time was trivial in the face of the physical.
Sensations lured her forward with warm euphoric dreams and brighter visions of the past. For a moment, she couldn’t identify the emotion heavy in her chest. Whether they were death’s temptation. But it wasn’t long before she realized they weren’t all acidic.
They were shades of colored wax she used to liven monochromatic children’s books. They were the light noise of tin cans tickling your ears as they clinked down cobblestone walkways. The mythical society of dust particles floating indefinitely against a window’s evening light. The stray fuzzy knits of her favorite sweater and the lingering scent of perfume from hugging close friends. 
They were the protective glow from oil street lamps guiding her way home. The giggling and tingles of bubbles popping from steins of beer. Fogged mirrors from steaming rooms with a hot bath and the way sounds muffled when sunken into a wooden tub. Stories told under the covers, fairytales to romantic confessions, until everyone fell asleep to dwindling candlelight.
These all lived in a hypothetical mist that rolled in. More of a fog, like those she experienced during her childhood winters in the Dales. How she’d begun the exchange with Astarion was unimportant. Details melted into something viscous. Consumed how the two had even met. 
Her fingers were still moving as far as she could understand. The atmosphere felt heavy against their journey, but they operated as their own entities. Their coordination, unsteady, persisted out of habit. The stripped down basics. 
Repetitive motion. Color. Air. Pressure. Darkness. Enveloping darkness.
“Stop,” she mumbled. “Please.” Words seemed warped from her lips, unsure she had even spoken them aloud. They felt incorporeal.
Hunched over her, Astarion was coursing with vitality he’d didn’t know how to tolerate. His fangs were hooked and mania was the only voice in his head. It wasn’t until he noticed her shallow gasps of air in his arms. How her muscles no longer fought against him. The desire to simply finish her screamed at him, but he found the strength to pull himself off. 
The elf’s grin framed his pointed teeth in their glory. He chuckled in his daze, unsure if her pathetic grasp for life were to be laughed at or pitied. She was food. An object. For once, he didn’t share that feeling. 
Astarion scoot back to let her head rest in his lap so he could revel in his dinner. Although, his fantasies couldn’t help be bombarded with the reality of her death on his hands. It all conflicted. Anxieties had been buffered by his bloodied delectation.
He slapped her cheek twice, printing her blood against her flesh in a hasty spattering. 
"C'mon. You haven’t lost that much.”
To no avail, the elf snapped his fingers over her shut eyes. He jostled her side to side. Pressed his hand against her neck, hoping to calm the flow unleashed. Soon, he noticed thin ribbons of red staining both of their clothes and caught himself staring  at the blood wet between his fingers.
“Wake. Up. Don’t make me start asking gods for favors.”
Despite a faint pulsing thump against his hand, her responses were absent. Even looking at her made him uneasy. He wondered if holding his gaze for too long would unlock parallels between him and this random young woman. A thought that would anger him if not for being appeased by his leeching. 
Suddenly, he considered her backpack and yanked it to his side, digging around for anything of use. He needed to stop the escalation. A potion. A salve. A deity with a worrying sense of humor.  
Within, a diamond shaped bottle glittered. One he recognized. It was commonly consumed among mortals for hangovers, bar fights, or the lucky escape from an owlbear. The concoction healed minor injuries and illnesses in a foul swoop. Thomasin’s sickness was more dire than half a bottle, but it was still a victory to toast to.
Astarion tucked a pillow between his thigh and her head to create elevation. And, with a gentle tug by the pad of his thumb, he lowered her bottom lip. Its glittering elixir slowly but surely ran down her throat.  
“Aha, wonderful. There you go. Watch your pretty little head.”
It took a minute or so, but Thomasin’s eyes finally flickered open. She had been unceremoniously thrown back into the realm of the living, where she lay in a veil of crimson strewn across her face. The land smelled of iron much richer than she remembered. But, her comprehension of her surroundings faltered.
“Do you know how irritating these stains are going to be to get out?” Astarion said, taunting her, egging her on to get a reaction. 
Thomasin’s body suddenly flinched. A ragged titter. The half-elf was at least somewhat responsive.
“Wasn’t it wonderful though?,” she whispered, nearly inaudible. 
Astarion’s ears perked up. Crisis had been averted. He was prompt to pull a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped the remaining evidence of bloodletting. With fresh water from her canteen, he soaked the fabric swatch and grazed it over her shoulders, chest, and neck. It wiped away what streamed down her arms. What dripped down her back. A courtesy of aftercare, wringing the tainted water into a bowl between each cleaning. 
Once she acknowledged she, too, was alive, she resigned herself to slumber. His touch was oddly gentle. Comforting. The mindless task allowed him to think clearly for the first in centuries. Although he was unsure what to do with said thoughts. Knowing what he was feeling had become impossible over the years. Trusting them, even more so.
The longer he studied her face, the more he considered it helped repress the urge to kill. It forced him to humanize his prey. A concept he wasn’t privy to. A new novelty. 
The elf ran his hand along her cheeks and admired her freckles through backhanded compliments not spoken aloud. He traced along the thick scar across her nose, pressing into the curl of her lashes to reveal her blinded eye, and conjured stories of how it came to be. Then, his trail took him up. The space where her fringe often fell and covered her forehead. 
Right atop her brow, a tattoo had been intentionally hidden. The pattern consisted of four shapes laid in a row, overlapping one another in mashed thieves cant. Its black ink had faded. Damage that could only come from years of sun and forcible scrubbing.
“Everyone in Baldur’s Gate is owned by someone,” he mumbled, twisting his head every which way to decipher the tattoo’s meaning.
Eventually, he grew bored of solving her mysteries and situated himself in the corner of her tent. From the sullied water bowl, he wiped his own face with a dampened cloth, sneaking self-indulgent licks of what was left on his forearms. Only then did he notice he was shaking. 
But the only person that could judge him was comatose. Her chest gently rose and fell with each rickety breath, but she would awake in the morning. For now, he'd keep an eye on her. What if she choked in her sleep? Stopped breathing altogether? He would be blamed.
It wasn’t difficult to busy himself in the confines of her tent. He was used to much more unwelcoming atmospheres where dangers lurked. Threats much more vile than him. 
As he rid of incriminating stains, the water bowl grew dark and rich. What the elf had cobbled together was a fine wine of his own. Stealing an empty glass bottle, he began to store the liquid away for a rainy day. A treat for later.
Even engulfed in his usual unease, he couldn’t help but laugh. Maybe it was amusement. Maybe fatigue like before. Disbelief, even.
One thing was certain.
By the gods, he was rightfully fed. 
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sadisthetic · 8 months ago
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hi. this is my dnd character for toonkind dnd that i first made 7 years ago that ive recycled twice now because i wanted to finally play an ongoing campaign with him. for his third life, not only did i give him a design update, hes also has undergone a MAJOR overhaul in terms of personality and backstory tho i kept some bare basics the same (human ranger with urchin background who LOVES swords and knifes A LOT. and that he has an ambiguous age) the overhaul includes the isekai. and that hes a cunt now. but hes funnier now too lol.
im adding some more details and trivia about him under the readmore
so like if it isnt obvious the double isekai is meant to mirror the fact that i fucking played with him in 3 separate campaigns now. its part of him metatextually now lol. he was such a different guy tho. an EXTREMELY LOYAL guy. now hes significantly more selfish. and rude as hell. but hes not that to be mean or malicious. hes actually a pretty nice guy hes just extremely inconsiderate bc he prioritizes his own wellbeing most of the time. its how he had to grow up
copy pasting this tweet i wrote about him "blade at 15 was a guy that shouldve been playing halo while drinking monster but instead hes a guy stealing apples and eating mushrooms off tree bark. miraculously few instances of poisoning all things considered"
he wouldve been a fucking gamer otaku fr. he got isekaied in the mid 2000s and as a kid he fucking LOVED watching dragonball on saturday mornings. if he got to be a teen on earth, he would eventually found the anime and gaming subcommunities online BUT ALAS. he grew up trying to catch fish with his bare hands. or at least he did until he gave up quick and ate weeds.
also. despite the hardships. hes like. fine? somethings wrong with him. but its not trauma. he didnt mourn his parents much although its not like he couldve done anything with their freshly isekaied corpses when immediately hes being chased by fucking beasts. its okay they were like b-tier parents. (hes definitely not a normal person.)
he wandered the woods trying his best to survive alone and in spite of everything trying to kill him (including the shit he ate...) he ended up in a nearby(?) town and things got a bit easier after that. because he could fucking steal to eat real food now. he stayed in the woods on the outskirts of town bc no one showed grace to a thief and just dropped in every so often to swipe shit. steadily he learned forage (through sheer trial and error)
he was highkey a menace. but eventually in his late teens, a traveling party gave him an idea to like fucking. get a job. as something. he managed to make it work as a ranger/guide for hire
he fucking loves booze. he absolutely underage drank. when he could steal it. and later pay for it. and also even though he could pay for things as an adult, he still steals shit if he thinks he can get away w it (he has an absurdly (or at least pretty) high sleight of hand stat)
before he got isekai'd a second time, went through a CATASTROPHIC DIVORCE with an elf woman who he met in an expedition party who became enamored with him after he saved her life. the uh. fallout happened bc blade didnt realize (and still hasnt realized) that hes kinda aro (fundamentally did not understand her romantic intentions and thought she was just a friend wanted to hang out w him a lot. those were dates.) and his ex didnt realize how onesided it was bc she was so love with him. geez.
also. he was from arizona. hes half white half mexican. but with all the time spent not speaking spanish in a different fucking world, it made any spanish speaking skills he had atrophy to hell. it happens and it was bound to happen bc he was so young and had like no reason or opportunity to practice.
also he chose his name. he hated his lame ass name so much he was like "wait. i dont have to use it anymore." but he was 13 fucking years old. anyways he thought blade sounded cool for a name. knifedad happened later when he got his first knife. he still had a bad naming sense. he was 14.
also although his ethics are kinda wack, whats important to note is that he ultimately doesnt want anyone to like. die. its like his policy. save people that he can while trying his best to not die himself
he also has a soft spot for kids. whether hed bc a good dad is debatable but like. i think hed be a nice one
most important note: his longsword is named Darla, his dagger is named Samantha, the knife in his pack is named Nicky, and his newly acquired strange glowy sword is named lucia, and he wants a cool greatsword very very very fucking bad
i drew him in his under clothing also so that i could have a better sense for his body type when i designed his new outfit im adding it here too. he has a shitton of scars bc hes the type that pisses ppl off that they wanna shank him and also he routinely eats shit a lot. a lot of the scars in this sketch are pretty random except for one specific injury for a certain backstory event i have in mind
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thingsasbarcodes · 4 months ago
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Young Justice 4x01 - Inhospitable
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