#had to no-think my way through these fr
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Rottin' the brain
(:
#emd fanart#acey doodles#no think sketches#had to no-think my way through these fr#lil doodle dump#doodle doodle doo#them#the besties#so cathartic to ~just sketch~ oh my stars#wehehehe#:)
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I don't want to regret the way I lived
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#gojo satoru#nobara kugisaki#nanami kento#choso kamo#junpei yoshino#jjk leaks#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#this idea started as a 2 part series . then my braincells decided to spark and supplied 7 PAGES#'did you sleep hina' no#ws looking up mentally stable things like 'who has died in jjk' smh i love my hyperfixation media im sooooo glad so many ppl r DEAD#i *could* have included more ppl but i think this is a good crew. this is a yuuji emotional support crew#also Was gna include his grandpa final panel but i Did Not Want To#he is implied through th dialogue#side note i donot like how i cn see this scenario playing out . ..yuuji this isnt ur stop u r monopoly voice Just Visiting ok >:(#anyway I broke my own heart with this and ik i hyped it up a lot but i hope that its not just me...#hope i did not hype it up fr nothing and no one else finds it devastating :((((( that would b humbling in the worst way#pls ...join the happy party train.......i hate it here i suffered pls :<<<<#also !!!! colours in this !! i cooked i fear . adding th first bit of warm hitting yuuji's face after th first 2 panels....#ive never had that kind of experience while drawing before it was wild . painful ! but wild.#the whole transition from p 2->3 might b the most emotionally moving piece ive ever made to me#not 2 sing my own praises tho i will shut up ! i wil. nap
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had a Thought about skrimm/barnabos (offhandedly mentioned very light/not plot related spoilers for eps 1 through 8)
so obviously barnabos has his thing with the woman in the shell right? calling her lover and all — it’s very clear they’re in a romantic relationship. it feels to me like it’s also kind of a warlock-patron or follower-god dynamic given her nature as some kind of otherworldly being (giving barbabos boons/abilities, appearing as fish, etc)
so imagine when barbabos catches feelings for skrimm and realizes it…how could he betray his lover, his muse, his goddess, even, like that? what would she think if she knew? she’d abandon him, certainly, and she would be justified. what is he to do? i mean, he might just be reading too deep into it and it’s just friendship. that comforts him a bit. but a part of him knows what he feels and it horrifies him. he loves the woman in the shell and devoted himself fully to her. but was that love anything more than admiration now? when had his romantic feelings for her dissipated and weakened enough to let someone else in? and skrimm, lazy slacker and sleazy conman skrimm, of all people? maybe if he can convince that nagging part of him, neither skrimm or his lover will learn of this sin, and he’ll forget all about it. he’s not sure he can. he tells himself it’ll pass eventually, as all things do and manages to believe it
and skrimm would react similarly, too. it just started as a joke by queenie and him exploiting a loophole (and barnabos’ assumption of him meaning well) to not do any work…he should’ve known to keep his guard up, to stop himself from getting too close — closer than he already was to all of them. in such a dangerous situation, attachment was a disadvantage. sticking together and being friends benefits the party, of course. more people, more skillsets, means more chances of survival. but love messes with skrimm’s head, and he’s not the smartest already — who’s to say he won’t sacrifice himself for barnabos’ sake? its a scary thought, and its even scarier that he doesn’t have a strong aversion to the idea. he has to get rid of these feelings somehow and he will figure it out…hopefully
#hngsksj#skrimm/barnabos has sooo much angst potential#i had this funky (not really) little thought and let it fester and now here we are#idk what im talking about really im not even a third of the way through icebound yet#but! it’s fun to think about#im sure this has been thought about before but i havent seen it (if anyone has read a good non spoilery skrimm/barnabos fic…….gimme)#id love to write something exploring this concept but if i drop my current fic ill never finish it#also shoutout to skrimm for being the king he is. hes dressed in practically rags but still has piercings and a fancy dagger#gayest (very affectionate of course) goblin in avantris fr#legends of avantris#icebound#skrimm stabbaskotch#barnabos the dreadwake
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Swinging a bat at a hornet's nest, but I keep seeing the opinion go around that it's insensitive to say that we'll make it through the next 4 years because so many people didn't the first time around. Which, I guess I see the point, but like... do you expect all of us to just be like this for the next 4 years???
I totally get why some people can't feel hopeful, but insinuating that someone else is in the wrong for being able to stay optimistic just isn't productive or, in my opinion, a reasonable expectation. We all react to stressful times differently and not only is that okay, but it should be encouraged that people work through this however they personally need to and in whichever emotional state they end up in.
#uspol#politics#it's like grief in a sense. everyone responds differently and it's not disrespectful to have a positive reaction in the face of it.#my family loves looking at old pictures of passed loved ones. I can't do it and will leave the room to do something else#but it's not disrespectful for them to be happy when I can't join in. yk? it's just a different response.#sometimes I think I've had too much cognitive behavioral therapy for this website. ngl.#i'll be over here reframing my thoughts and identifying black-and-white thinking and challenging my catastrophizing#but you guys can keep arguing about if it's ethical to have certain emotions right now. that's chill too i guess.#but fr. every emotional response is okay right now.#some people are going to respond in ways that you don't understand but that doesn't make it an incorrect response.#I personally do not understand the doom and apathy but I respect that people need to work through that in their own time-#I just need them to not try and drag me back into it when I'm ready to put my mental health back together and deal with whatever comes.
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please see my vision
bonus: Heathcliff smile collection
#limbus company#heathcliff#dante#my art#i shouldve made Don speak more donlike but I just had to get this out there#I saw a post on twitter that talked about how like#maybe the reason why heathcliffs temper is so bad is because everything he hears goes through like#the filter of his inferiority complex#even if someone said smth nice to him he might get defensive about it#coughing bc I feel like dante is equally likely to be nice to him or to just keep teasing him back#yaoi …#what you don’t see in this comic is Dante probably thought for a long time about heathcliffs good points#how hes strong and smarter than he looks and how shockingly often he stands up for them#his strong sense of justice…#but they probably thought it’d be best not to say something like that.#one of dantes other things is theyre surprisingly… frivolous? in some ways. idk how to say it#like when they get called inhuman they basically just shrug it off#I feel like thinking deeply about heathcliffs strong points and then ultimately choosing to say something surface level is very dante.#and of course heathcliff thinks they’re fucking around.#sorry I put a lot of thought into the characterisation in this joke comic UAOHSOSI I need these two to have deeper interactions fr#yea. i dont self insert as dante im genuinely haunted by visions for this ship and idek why#they probably picked smth silly partially out of being hesitant to genuinely say something partially out of genuinely liking his smile#(it IS very cute. when you get to see it its like woah#heathcliff I didn’t know you could smile so brightly…)#and partially out of wanting to see how he’d react to (totally not flirting) being complimented on his appearance#opening up Dante’s brain to analyse their character I like them a normal amount#and… I really want there to be a moment between them where Dante genuinely speaks encouragingly to heathcliff#the same way they do to sinclair#I think heathcliff needs that too#and… it’d be cute to see him a little flustered.
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i love black women
#speaking of not beating the beautiful angel allegations!!!!!! 。:゚(;´∩`;)゚:。 ♡#( ꈍᴗꈍ) i went to a black beauty store earlier for more leave in conditioner and the cashier was such an angel#she had a TLC shirt and i complimented it n we started gassing each other up (。ノω\。) ♡ her edges were so pretty#it was a rly nice time and she called me beautiful and love (✿ ‚‚⌒‿⌒‚‚) i am still so happy i got to talk to her today#i don't ever rly think about how i wear my natural hair out but I'm glad it's appreciated for being worn that way ♡ i love u#only another black person would tell me this and the love i felt in there rly makes me miss living in that town instead#i don't get to talk w black folk as often here 。:゚(;´∩`;)゚:。 it's so nice when i get to but augh.. maybe i should move back lol.#it's not far away 🧐 it's just the next town over actually. and u could drive through my town in like ten minutes and not even know you were#in it lol#anyways 🚶🏾♀️ I'm feeling myself rn and im hype and that girl was an angel fr i hope she's having a good night rn
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phone calls my detested
#i had to make a vet appointment and Wow i am not cut out for this whole independent adult thing lmfao#i had to write down a little script for myself...#i feel so bad for the receptionist i was stumbling and 'uhhhhh'ing my way through that call#fuck and when i was supposed to end the call. i didnt realize#I DONT KNOW THE PROTOCOL OKAY#do i hang up??? do i say bye??? she didnt say bye so was there something else i was supposed to say#she hung up so Yay but oughhhhhhh what the fuck#youre telling me people just Know how to carry a conversation? they just Know the routine? sounds fake#i had to rev myself up for the call too#put on a hat. put on sunglasses to trick my brain into thinking we're outside doing things thus fabricating confidence#phone in one hand fidget-dodecahedron in the other. Pacing#my brain is a normal brain that works perfectly fine thanks for asking#absolutely unprompted#i feel so connected to my neanderthal ancestors when i have to make a call#theyre being stalked by a smilodon... i have to talk to a person... same Fear <3#no but fr whenever i have to talk to someone my thought process shuts down Completely and i forget that im a living human being#fight or flight - neither. freeze and play dead#i think in my next life... i would like to be... a decorative plant#perhaps one of those tall ferns outside a seaside barbecue restaurant#i'd Win at that life. id be so good at photosynthesizing & rustling in the ocean breeze
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dawg, one thing abt me is that i've always been an advocate for yukine and yato's happiness.... so i'm just curious.... WHEN EXACTLY WILL ADATCHITOKA PAY FOR THEIR CRIMES AGAINST THIS KID AND HIS SILLY SELF-PROCLAIMED DAD 😭 LET MY BOYS REST MAN DAMN
#NO BC THIS ABSOLUTELY WRECKED ME#YUKINE HOLDING ONTO YATO AFYER HE SAW HIM FADING AWAY I CANT DO THIS#BRO HAS JUST BEEN THROUGH IT AND NOW HE'S GONNA LOSE BOTH YATO AND HIYORI AT THE SAME TIME ATCYALLY GONNS#naw i gave up on the direction of this manga ever since father decided to create his lil nation#i ABSOLUTELY DISLIKE THE DIRECTION THEY WENT FOR#and SEKKI SHOULD'VE FINISHED OFF FATHER NOT HAKKI I SAID WHAT I SAID#but anw LET MY BOY REST FR HE'S BEEN THROUGH SM SHIT ADATCHITOKA U CANT KEEP GETTING AWAY W THIS#i'm actually sobbing this part hurt me sm 😭#noragami#yato#yukine#noragami spoilers#i still love noragami despite the writing. i've just been way too emotionally invested in the story and characters for years#save my boys bro#they've had enough fr#no bc wHAT HAPPENED TO YATO 😭#ion even wana think abt it bro. i see nothing but tragedy and absolute pain in the next & last chapter#adatchitoka is so gracious giving us a whole month to prepare for what's to come 🥰#man i hope yato is okay 😭 i doubt it tho 😭😭😭😭😭#mine
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Same Age AUs are so fascinating to me, and of the ones I've seen I really like them. In particular if we have Reigen and Shigeo both as middle schoolers because instead of an older mentor figure Shigeo is ending up with another kid. He gets to have a friend his age who gets to drag him around to do stuff and it's nice, really nice to have a friend he can relate to. Meanwhile Reigen has soooo many ✨issues✨ but hey he's great at bullshitting and is getting Shige to open up some more, while on the flip side he's also getting a friend and can go out and do more now that he has someone to do stuff with. Plus they make great business partners so this is going amazingly :D
Another version I like is if this is the result of some time travel shenanigans, mostly because I like seeing a more stark contrast between kid Reigen and adult Reigen, especially through Shigeo's eyes because... this isn't his shishou, not exactly, because kid Reigen doesn't have the years of life experience that helps his words hold more meaning, even if kid Reigen is still a great talker and bullshitter. He can't say everything right that Shige needs to hear and its a bit off putting, especially if kid Reigen has different views on being "special" and whatnot (considering... "I want to be someone"). But there's still elements there that is just so Reigen in the way he talks and the way he moves that its like. Yeah, this is a kid, but it's the same person and everyone can see just how Reigen is, this is how he started. He's not Shigeo's shishou but he's still Reigen.
#mp100#reigen arataka#kageyama shigeo#just like with ageswap id love to take a crack at a same age au just bc i think its neat#also we dont have enough post canon stuff with the kids all grown up like cmon i wanna see how they develop#if we gonna have ageswap give us more timeline fuckery like same age aus and post canon#alternate meetings are cool too i like seeing diff possibilities#i just think shige and kid reigen would be great friends. just two lil guys doing their best#((no ship though. keep in mind canon material 🔫))#phantom bunnies#mp100 same age au#i think the other way around if theyre both adults would be neat too#because they got sooo many issues to sort through#seri 🤝 shige#he's just like me fr#reigen gotta help not one but two overpowered psychic shutins#imagine by this point he's not even running s&s anymore he's already moved on to smth else bc he never had that meeting with kid shige#ALSO ALTERNATIVELY. SAME AGE AU BUT BC OF TIME TRAVEL SHENANNIGANS#OLDER SHIGE GOING BACK IN TIME BC SOMETHING HAPPENED IN THE FUTURE#time travel fuckery my beloved
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prize for least genre aware protagonist 👑
#no because Thor trusted Loki so much and was oblivious and that's what made the whole thing a tragedy#but Thor was really out there like 'what do you MEAN Loki lied to me about Father's death and my banishment... let me try appealing to him'#except Thor's version of appeal is like a really really bad apology where the person doesn't want to admit they did anything#and also isn't convinced you're hurt#and Thor's SO SURE this plan will work because he knows his brother right#he knows Loki#and his plan which in accordance to him would have worked was to appeal to Loki's good side/the truth of who would be hurt#his plan was to do away with Loki's assumed anger by being like ''noooo don't do this here hit me instead <3''#and he thought Loki wouldn't do it.#which means that before the whole plot shenanigans that would have worked and Loki also wouldn't have hit Thor#Loki watching Thor try to manipulate him by acting like his feelings are invalid the same way Frigga and Odin tried: nice try. thot. *wack*#so anyway Thor got hit and I think that's what u get for being soooooo sure that your little brother who u take for granted won't get hurt#by anything discouraging said or done or implied or being used by u for about him <3#anyway the fact that Thor was SO sure that Loki was reacting badly and would calm down and be normal again is so sad actually#because it means Thor had the experience to know that's how it should have gone#which means when that's not what happened Thor also gets to be the one who has to work through processing that Loki's changed#and I don't think he DID that in the year where Loki was gone#he just neglected thinking about it until Loki was back and suddenly he couldn't pretend his brother had been the same (good) one at death#sad ironic something something character foils too late tragedy#Thor really went out there like i got this and got <beep>slapped fr fr#and then it happened again when he showed up for the Bifrost fight#Thor: i just have to wait it out. we all get angry. he'll get better#Loki: [screaming crying raging shrieking trying to kill him]#Thor: HE'LL GET BETTER#the fact that Thor doesn't expect the lies or the hitting or the unreasonable attitude even when Loki is VERY angry.......... ;-;#Thor watched his brother deteriorate in real time
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guys i have been in a state for days. i am giddy i am gasping for air i am broken inside i am blushing i am sweating i am twirling my hair i am suffering i dont know how to deal with the very real possibility that nandor has loved guillermo for years and has been restraining himself, feigning aloofness, keeping his distance, because all these years he understood that maybe guillermo would never be ready for vampirism - and maybe hes been so depressed in the latest years because hes finally found someone he wants to spend eternity with, and he strongly suspects he will spend eternity missing them instead
#i truly truly truly dont know how to deal#this season recontextualised the whole show for me#if i shipped nandermo before now i am absolutely batshit crazy about them and its all i think about#wwdits#wwdits spoilers#what we do in the shadows#nandermo#this is just speculation but i just - i feel it in my bones#like fuck imagine having been alone for 800 years. fuck. imagine losing lover after lover and being kind of a disaster at romance actually#imagine finding someone you so easily connect with and theyre so amazing you love them so much they can even hold their own against you#and fuck they like you back. and then you understand that they are too fundamentally kind to be a monster.#and its like a fucking stake through the heart its like youre made of glass and youre shattering#i hate this and i swear to god. they need to end up together. not just to end up together#they need to spend the rest of their lives together and ideally eternity tbh#i dont care gizmo you get over the killing hangup and have nandor turn you and spend eternity in#bliss and shenanigans. like man. man. man. i love how this season turned out i really do#but i hope its more of a ‘he had not thought it through and wasn’t ready and also we need to have nandor do it fr’#anyway nandor becoming human is also ok but i really hope that they find a way to navigate guillermos inability to kill#like. nandor killing for him or him robbing blood banks or him only hunting predators etc#or him feeding without killing people#just bc i still really like the concept of them having so much time together and their time together not be limited#i feel like after all those years pining for one another. they deserve that
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unconditionally
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi#yuuji#im shaky and numb the way this took years off my life#genuinely cannot believe i thought it was smart to make it a comic i could have stuck at a painting and it would have been fine#but nooooooo in my hubris i thought Surely im an expert at this longform stuff now Surely i can do it :)#and then it killed me it killed me dead this is like over twice as long as the train comic and 4 times as detailed#backgrounds . angles. i yearn fr death.#AND I HAD 2 WRITE THEM ACTUALLY TALKING GGSDH i am actually so insecure abt the way the dialogue flows gomen....#i wanted to add more to it to fix how clipped and rushed i think it reads#but that would mean drawing more expressions would mean drawing more panels would mean more gd hyDRANGEAS#so ultimately i decided 2 have the conversation take the hit because let me tell u.#if i have to draw. one more blue petal i will snap i will lose it#i knew tht would happen n wanted to alleviate some of the pain so i found a few brushes that helped speed up the process#but the thing w a lot of premade flower brushes is they also come preshaded n look uniform in a way that stands out badly against my style#so i had 2 render over them anyway........#yuuji's domain rly putting me through the wringer first the train station now death by a bajillion petals smh#all that to say tho . my labour of love . i am going to take a nap#hina.comic
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i am officially, FINALLY all caught up again in both the manga and the anime for bsd and OH BOY there are thoughts and opinions but also WHO CARES because my tags are finally FREE to be unfiltered
#hnnnnnn#i am SO happy#i am BEYOND happy#i love the arc even if i complain about it a lot#but i am also hnnnnnn…….displeased……..with a few things#the anime fr about to catch these hands#i already KNEW they were rushing it from the few episodes i had watched#but the anime is usually SO good at pacing#that i fully trusted that certain things would be slowed down for significance/impact/etc#but instead the pacing just stayed WAY too fast for me#and they ended up cutting SO many small moments that had SO much importance like im going crazy about some of them#some of the lines they cut…….#or even adjusted slightly that it drew away the impact#ugh i KNOW there was a LOT to balance and a LOT of content to get through#but i am a little disappointed that so many emotional scenes were what ended up suffering for it#this is why i don’t usually like reading the manga for animes i watch#i always end up getting disappointed by the limitations of adaptations#that being said though regardless of general limitations i don’t think some of the rushing is above criticism#and i am going to go and eat glass while seething over the particularly offensive rushing/cuts😤#OKAY DONE that’s the last i’ll say about it i would just go crazy if i didn’t vocalize it somewhere#in general i was VERY happy with the arc in both the manga and the anime i have SO much love for it#definitely a favorite for me#and THAT concludes my very vague no spoiler review#i swear one of these days my self control is going to snap#and im just going to start posting my full essays and content analysis shit about everything i watch here#but for now we’re safe and all my rants will stay spoiler free tag paragraphs instead godbless🙏
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i know periods of loneliness come and go and i know that it’s Okay!!!! or whatever but also i’m really sick of it lmfao and it feels like it’s lasting Too Long this time and i really want a change but also every time this has changed i’ve just ended up feeling lonely in different ways . does anybody know what to do about this
#like it’s not about being ‘friendless’ tho ofc that’s been a factor at times#it’s that even when this isn’t a factor i still feel like it’s useless and that i’m just as lonely as i was when i was alone#like DAMN maybe i’m the problem fr and i’ve found the few people in my life that will ever love me#and that’s all i get.#okay DEEP BREATH. IM ONLY TWENTY. IM ONLY TWENTYYYYYYY#but u know what. when you’ve felt this way for almost half your life . through periods of friendlessness and periods of being surrounded#by friends. it’s real hard to believe that it will ever go away fully.#like what if it doesn’t matter and it’s just me. and i’m not the kind of person that gets to feel any way but this . but whatever i think#it’s actually chill#*through gritted teeth* i’m only twenty.#and i never mean to sound ungrateful for the people i do have bc i really feel lucky in a lot of ways . but 1) they’re all far away#and 2) it’s really easy for that to feel like that’s not enough when i’m seemingly surrounded by people who are just so natural at#connecting with people . when i had to fight and claw my way towards every meaningful thing that’s ever happened to me#and i’m sure that’s not fair but i mean….. you can only feel on the outside of everything for so long before you start to believe that it’s#your fault and that it’s where you belong . but no i’m chill#i’m CHILL.
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Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩
#the klock keeps ticking#yttd#i wanna replay yttd so bad but i also like Gotta play other stuff with the time i have akskks#but yeah the brainrot this specific character has given me idk if I ever really talked about it but it was BAD#i like obsessively played the game in like 3 days and it was not a good idea lol but just like shin#i had to take like a week to recover from this guy cuz i couldnt stop thinking about him and how hes just like me fr#first off just the very inconsistent personality hes got going on that is very me he has these different personalities he wears to cope with#all the traumatic shit happening hes both so helpless its comical and so manipulative its terrifying#and idk its really interesting how like good and bad he is at being manipulative like hes very smart and can analyze weaknesses and lie so#good not even he knows the truth but hes also grasping at straws he doesnt think things through at all#like the second main game he just didnt prepare at all hes fumbling his way through everything its going so bad#he just wants to go home he wants to outdo the game makers but hes being used by them so bad he wants it to STOP#and its just the way that like. it hits so hard cuz you know hes really not a bad person not at all he doesnt want any of this hes just#being horribly manipulated and doing whatever he can to survive but its also really scary how#well hes able to lie and manipulate and claw his way through but hes also weaker than a grade schooler#and you never forget that either and as much as he cheated his way through he still failed it was all just a cheap trick in the end#and all of this hits very hard like his personality is eerily similar to mine and just the way he thinks and acts#cuz im the same like im weak and a dweeb who likes funny cats but im also emotionally detached and observant and selfish#but where it hits the hardest is his relationship with midori like oooof that one was too real just like#the first person who was ever his friend was horribly abusive and treated him like a child and didnt respect any boundaries#and he just got sick pleasure out of seeing shin be upset and he was like. a groomer#and shin was fucking relieved when he died but also kept his scarf and adopted his personality to survive#and still goes by sou after ch2 and the scene that gets me the most is when shin ai is asked about his relationship with midori#and you can just SEE how horrified shin is because his deepest shame his abuse is being shared to everyone without his consent#and hes reliving it all in that moment and literally seeing who he used to be experiencing the abuse#he just curls into himself and like covers his ears and pulls his hair thats literally what i do AAAAAA#im just so grateful for the direction they took this character kokichi ouma wishes he was shin tsukimi so bad#and yeah just like damn. its scary how similar i am to shin like damn i really am going through it huh oof#I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I WILL DEFEND HIM WITH MY LIFE HE DID ALL OF THAT STUFF YOUR HONOR BUT LISTENNNN#have you considered that hes cute and smart and weird and maybe just needs friends who arent assholes
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yatora yaguchi when i fucking get you
#blp posting#maybe i just generally feel like shit rn but now whenever i think about him i just get mad like.#the more that i think about it the more i agree w yotasuke on the 'being able to work hard is also a talent' thing bc like ur telling me#that this bitch was able to pivot to art midway through his second year of high school. and then had the drive to work hard enough that he#was able to get accepted into a top university in a year in a half?? like sure the 'exam pieces' thing mightve been a part of that but noo#he still thinks he's untalented in any way like dont piss me offffffff. like im not going to sit here and say that he's like. yotasuke leve#genius or whtvr but he's drawn so much and so well. fr im goign to fucking kill him#and that isnt even talking about the fact that he actually managed to find a passion that he wanted to pursue enough to work that hard to#accomplish it?? i would kill to have that kind of drive in my life rn. yatora when i fucking get you. i need him gone#anw coming from someone who's had chronic art block for 3 years this is probably biased hahaaaa
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