#had me gagged the whole time
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its wild to me how tamlin point blank explains what fey/re did to his court, how she hurt it and weakened their only defnese against Hybern in the process because she threw a hissy fit over the fact that he tried everything to get her back from someone who has made the entire world think that he is the absolute scum of the earth. and fey/re has the audacity to say that he “doesn’t get to rewrite the narrative”
like HUH??????
i’m sorry but… there was not a single thing that he said she did that she didn’t do.
like sweetheart you admitted that what you did to the spring court was bad not even 3 pages ago. but now that you get called out for it???? now its rewriting the narrative.
#acotar critical#sjm critical#anti rhysand#anti feyre#like what the fuck?#make it make sense#because the math is definitely not mathing#and you know what??? i agree with tamlin#he came to the meeting just speaking fax#had me gagged the whole time
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I never touched it but I feel like i only ever hear positive things said about song of achilles.. in (rough strokes at least) what makes it dogshit to you?
Okay it's been a while since I actually read it so some of this might not be spot on accurate. Sorry if at any point I say 'the book never does xyz' and it actually does once or twice but I think my underlying criticisms are accurate
-Patroclus is made into like this soft gentle tender quivering little yaoi boy. In the source text, he's shown as compassionate and moved by the suffering of his own men (and apparently having some medical skill, tending to the wounded in the camp), but very much invested n combat and very, very good at it (pages worth of descriptions of the guys he's killing left and right). In this, the arguably more complex character from this 8th century BC text is flattened into Being A Healer, he doesn't want to go to war he just wants to help people, he only goes because Achilles has to but he doesn't want to fight he's a HEALER he's a gentle lover NOT A FIGHTER who just wants to help he just wants to help everyone around him he HEALS while Achilles is a doomed warrior who is so good at fighting and KILLING its a DICHOTOMY GUYS!!!LIKE THE BEAUTIFUL SUN AND MOON DOOMED LOVERS SO SAD patocluse HEALER . (I Think he's specifically characterized as being BAD at fighting but might be misremembering)
-I don't remember much about Achilles' characterization I think it just makes him less of a jackass while not adding anything of interest and levels out into being mad boring.
-Not getting into the literal millenias old debate whether the mythological characters Achilles and Patroclus were being characterized as some type of lover by the original oral sources of the Iliad or its Homeric writers. We will never know. We don't even know what (if any) culturally accepted conventions of male homosexuality existed in bronze age Greece (we know much more about their descendants). But there are some interesting elements of their characterization in this direction, with how unconventional their relationship is WITHIN the text itself- Patroclus is described as cooking for Achilles and his guests (very specifically a woman/wife's job), Achilles chides Patroclus like a father, but there's also scene where Achilles' mourning of him directly echoes a passage of Hector's wife mourning her husband, Patroclus is explicitly stated to Achilles' elder, and is overall treated as his equal or near-equal, closest confidant and most beloved friend (to the point that pederastic classical Greeks would debate over who was erastes (older authority figure lover) and who was eromenos (adolescent 'beloved')- many took it as a given that this text depicted their present-day cultural norms of homosexual behavior but it existed so Outside of these norms that it had to be debated who was who). Their relationship is non-standard both within the text and to the descendants of the civilization that wrote them.
Basically what I'm saying is this book had opportunities to like, explore the unconventionality of the relationship (being presented here as explicitly lovers), explore the dynamics of why Patroclus wants to do 'women's work' (besides being a tenderhearted softboy), the weird dynamics where they take on paternal roles to each other but also roles of wives, how they feel about being this way, and just kind of Doesn't. Which I guess isn't an intrinsic fault (because it omits much of what I just talked about to begin with). it's just like.... Lame. This book takes jsut abandons everything interesting about the source text in favor of flattening it into bland Doomed Yaoi.
-The conflict that sets off the core story of the Iliad is Achilles and Agamemnon fighting over Briseis, an enslaved Trojan woman taken by Achilles as a war-trophy, Achilles spends most of the story moping because he was dishonored by his 'trophy' being taken. Achilles and Patroclus and everyone else are raping their captives, all the women in the story are either captured Trojans (or in the case of the free women within the walls of Troy, soon to be enslaved, and are slave owners themselves). Slavery as an institution and extreme patriarchal conventions are innate to the text and reflective of the context in which it was developed. You cannot avoid it.
But obviously you can't have your soft yaoi boys doing this, so the author has them capturing women to Protect Them from the other men. Their slaves are UNDER THEIR PROTECTION and VERY SAFE (and they might even Like And Befriend Them but I might be misremembering that. Briseis does though). Our heroes have apparently absorbed none of the ideals of the culture they exist in and the author seems to think "they're gay and aren't sexually attracted to their captives" would translate to them being outright benevolent (also as if wartime sexual violence is just about attraction and not part of a wider spectrum of violent acts to dehumanize and brutalize an accepted 'enemy')
In the source text, Briseis mourns Patroclus as being the kindest to her of her captors, who tried to get her a slightly better outcome by getting her married to Achilles (which probably would be the Least Bad of all possible outcomes for a woman in that situation, becoming a legal wife instead of a slave), and wonders what will happen to her now that he's gone. This is a really really sad, horrible, and compelling dynamic which could be fleshed out in very interesting ways but is instead is tossed entirely aside in favor of them being Besties. Like brother and sister.
All of the above pisses me off so much. If you don't want to engage in the icky parts of ancient/bronze age Greece then don't write a retelling of a story taking place in bronze age Greece. I'm not gonna get mad at children's adaptations of Greek myths or silly fun stories loosely based on them for omitting the rape and slavery but it is SO fundamental to the Iliad. If you're not willing to handle it, either fully omit it or better yet set your Iliad inspired yaoi in an invented swords-and-sandals setting where you can have all your heartbreaking tragic doomed lovers plot beats and not have to clumsily write around the women they're brutalizing.
-The author didn't seem to know what to do with Thetis and she made her just like, Achilles bitch mother who spends most of the story trying to separate our Yaoi Boys (iirc her disguising Achilles as a girl and hiding him on Scyros is made to be more about getting him away from Patroclus than trying to save her son from his prophesied doom in the Trojan War) until she sees how much they loooove each other and I think helps Patroclus' spirit get to the afterlife or something in the end?
-This is more of a personal taste gripe but it has that writing style I loathe where the prose feels less like a story and more like an attempt to string together Deep Beautiful Hard Hitting Poetic Lines that will look great as excerpts on booktok (might predate booktok but same vibe). It's all very Pretty and Haunting and Deep but feels devoid of real substance.
I really like The Iliad and The Odyssey in of themselves. They're fascinating historical texts that give a window into how 8th century BC Greeks told their stories, saw their world, interpreted their ancestors, etc. And genuinely I think these texts have 'good' characters, there's a lot of complexity and humanity to it.
WRT the Iliad- all of the main Achaeans are pretty fascinating, the one singular part where Briseis Gets To Talk and laments her situation is great, Achilles fantasizing that all of the Trojans AND the Achaeans die so he and Patroclus alone can have the glory of conquering Troy (wild), Achilles asking to embrace Patroclus' shade and reaching out for him but it's immaterial (and the shade being sucked back underground with a 'squeak' (the squeak kinda gets me it's disturbing and sad)), Hecuba talking about wanting to tear out Achilles' liver and eat it in a (taboo, exceptioally pointed) expression of rage and grief for his mutilation of her son's corpse, just one tiny line where the enslaved women performing ritual wailing for their dead captors are described as using it as an outlet to 'grieve for their own troubles' is heartrending, etc. A lot of grappling with anger and grief and the inevitability of death, a lot of groundwork laid for characters that could be very interesting when expanded upon in the framework of a conventional novel.
And Song Of Achilles really doesn't do much with all that. I know a lot of my gripes here are kind of just "It's different from the Iliad", I would have thought of it as mostly mediocre and forgettable rather than infuriating if it wasn't a retelling (and I DEFINITELY have strong biases here). But I think the ways in which it is different are less just a product of a retelling (of course there's going to be omissions and differences) and more a complete and utter disinterest in vast majority of its own subject matter, to the book's detriment. I think a retelling has a point when it EXPANDS on the source, or provides a NEW ANGLE to the source. This book doesn't Really do either, it just shaves off the complexity of its source material, renders the characters into a really boring archetype of a gay relationship, and gives very little else. Its content boils down to a middling tragic romance that has been inserted into the hollowed out defleshed skeleton of the Iliad.
Bottom line: I definitely would not be as mad about it if I wasn't familiar with the source material but I think it's fair to expect a retelling to Engage with/expand on its source, and I also think it's weak purely on its own merits. This book was set up to disappoint Me specifically.
#Sorry this turned into a 100000 word essay on The Iliad it can't be helped#I read Circe by the same author and thought it was like.. better? Definitely not great just less aggravating and kind of boring#Just rote 'you heard about this villainous woman from a Greek myth... Here's the REAL story' shit#It did have a few things I thought were good I remember it starting kind of strong and then just going limp for the remaining duration#I think part of it is that in that case she's expanding on a figure that Didn't have a whole lot of characterization in the source so#like. She had to actually Expand The Character#Again Silence of the Girls is the only Greek Mythology Retelling I have like....positive?.leaning positive? feelings towards#I've got BIG issues with it too but it does pretty much the exact opposite of everything I'm mad at SOA for and in some very#compelling ways (it's just that the author seems way more interested in Achilles and Patroclus than The Main Character Briseis#to the point of randomly starting to have Achilles POV interjections (which I thought were Good in of themselves but#really really really really really really really didn't need to be there) and then get kind of lampshaded by Briseis narrating 'I guess I#was trapped in Achilles' story the whole time lol!!!!!!')#It undermines the book on both a thematic level and just like. a construction level like it's real sloppy at times.#Also the Briseis POV sometimes has these like really out of place Author Mouthpiece Moments where she's very obviously#Stating The Point to the audience and it's like yeah we get it. We get it.#Wow in the scene were our mostly silent enslaved protagonist removes the gag from the mouth of a dead sacrificed girl as a#small but significant act of defiance and grieving in a book called 'Silence of the Girls' you inserted an ironic repeat of the line#'silence befits a woman'. in italics even. Thanks for that. I could not possibly have grasped the meaning of this scene if you didn't#spell it out for me like that. Thank you.#Actually hang on the only Greek mythology retelling I have unequivocally positive feelings for are the 'Minotaur Forgiving'#songs on 'This One's For The Dancer And This One's For The Dancer's Bouquet'. Fully love it. Like not just as songs I think it#does function well as a narrative and engages with and expands on the source in really beautiful and creative ways
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depressed men smoking in the rain is such a vibe
#fav#yakuza#yakuza 2#yakuza Kiwami 2#sanji#vinsmoke sanji#one piece#whole cake island#whole cake arc#was watching wci and this scene just reminded me of the rain scene from yakuza 2#i hope I cooked#Unfortunately Toei is Toei and this got slaughtered on my original upload on youtube#so I reedited it and STILL got Toei'd. Copyright is so weird.#thanks Toei. anyway Sanji is probably tied with Law for my favorite One Piece character of all time after watching more of Whole Cake Islan#and I made this edit both as a tribute and also just because I'm hyperfixated on both OP and Yakuza lmao#perv gags aside sanji is genuinely a fantastic character#it's like oda had to nerf him by making him have unfunny jokes#charlotte pudding#vinsmoke reiju#black leg sanji#sanji vinsmoke#one piece edit#like a dragon 2#rgg#rgg2
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devil marbly carbly ft me trying to figure out how to draw all of them in real time
(the dubstep weed jacking off shirt is from a meme i would source if i uh. remembered it sorry </3)
#there's a lot of little gags i'd recommend zooming in#also it's so weird how the first two dantes look Nothing like the rest of these pages. call it a warmup ig#also nero fuck you.mp4 i spent like 40 minutes trying to figure out how to draw dmc5 nero#my dmc4 nero didn't look That much like him but i was drowning with dmc5 nero trust me#anyway i had to draw some more dante on the last page bc even though he got a whole page most of it was like. bleh#for the sake of figuring out how to draw him not bleh. so i needed to draw him not bleh. :p#dmc#devil may cry#dante sparda#nero sparda#vergil sparda#eva sparda#nico dmc#lady dmc#trish dmc#v dmc#dmc5#dmc4#dmc3#pls excuse the shit lighting i am. figjting for my very life against directional lighting okay#this contains a lot of the little thoughts i had about dmcs 3-5 that i never posted about so. enjoy <3#skrunkart#a little nero x kyrie. as a treat#does kyrie have much going on as a character? no. do i think they're cute anyway? yes#i took the most liberties w trish and im pretty sure it's bc i was tired more than anything#these adhere pretty strongly to their game designs. in time i'll add details that make em mine#but this is a study (hence all the notes)#also this ended off a sketchbook ive spent like 1.5 yrs on (which is unprecedentedly long for me like it's Crazy it took that long)#so hoorayy
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WHAT THE HHELLFWVLFVWLWBGLWGBOFWKQFKO
#user: gossippool 😝#this is about x men 97 episode 5#why do they keep pushing the logan and jean love triangle plsss that GAGGED ME#ALSO WHAT IS WITH MAGNETO AND ROGUE ??????????? THEY HAVE LIKE A 4 MILLION YEAR AGE GAP#edit just had to pause this episode for like the third time bc WHAT IS WITH THIS WHOLE CHEATING ARGUMENT WITH THE CLONE#honestly i thought they overreacted to the clone in episode 1/2. who cares if that jean was a clone. she birthed nathan bro#they are like their own person atp
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220909 ISAC MALE DANCESPORT WINNER HWANG INTAK 👑
#p1harmony#p1h#p1hedit#malegroupsnet#kpopccc#intak#hwang intak#*mgif#can this count as a really really late birthday set#i wanted to make this since forever but i forgot to bring my personal laptop w me when i was in another city 😭#NE WAY MY MOST FAVEST INTAK MOMENT#IM SO PROUDDDDDDDD#i still watch this fancam from time to time like#he is a performer!!! he performs!!!!!!!!!!#cried when he was sitting on that fancy chair til the very end#he had that whole gymnasium gagged#when u can slightly hear the clapping when love never felt so good played#i love him#my son !
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home from work
#if I speak…#one of the girls walked out yesterday#the best worker we have is on the verge of blowing up on this bitch’s leaders bc since he can do everything quick and efficiently already#they’re putting 3 to 4 ppl’s workloads on him to see how far they can extend his worth and then they’re over his shoulder the whole time#micromanaging him so today he almost lost it and was literally walking around mumbling about his disrespectful they all are (facts)#and how if they don’t think he’s doing it right then they can do it and I know for a fact one of the ladies heard him#bc he wasn’t even trying to hide it at this point and like this dude is cool he has a lot of patience and helps out any way he can#so if HE’S on the brink of snapping then the rest of us don’t stand a chance LMFAO#anyways today was a fucking mess those leaders know nothing about our store yet so they have us making less than what we need until we need#it so we get behind constantly and they made prep a disaster bc again they think they can just prep a bunch of stuff in the morning#and it’ll last the whole day and yes that works in theory but the reality of the situation is every day is different and today#we sold double what we did yesterday so they had to move me to prep to fix their mistakes bc we were running out of stuff 4 hours in lmfao#and I’m the only one left who knows how to do everything on prep bc the other girls had never done it before#we’re supposed to prep 20 mac n cheese trays in the morning for the whole day#we open lunch at 10:30 tell me why I go into the cooler at 12 put more in the oven and there’s only 5 left#it’s been less than 2 HOURS and you’re already running out of macs which means those idiots prepped barely anything just to try and save mo#*money to cut down waste but that gag if you’re losing money bc now you’re short on everything and customers are leaving bc they’re having#to wait a long time for their food#and macs take 40 minutes to cool LMFAO#I get over there they’re out of parfaits they’re out of fruit cups they’re out of kale salads the front is coming in and having to take#stuff as I make it bc they keep getting orders and it’s all just a fucking mess#I have to make a custom wrap and what happens?? those morons didn’t pull the flatbreads out of the freezer like they’re supposed to every#night so now we have no flatbread and I had to run back there and put them in the warming drawer to defrost and we lost an order bc I had#nothing to make the wraps with <3#I go back there to get more cold chicken SPOILER ALERT they didn’t have anyone make any this morning so now there’s no chicken for the wrap#and salad and it has to be grilled and then chilled for 2 FUCKING HOURS before it can be used#they’re a fucking disaster like 😭#was the store perfect before?? ofc not but it ran quickly and efficiently as it should and now it’s literally just a mess#this bitch hasn’t even owned it for a full week yet and has already fucked it all up#womp womp!!!!!!
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What's your favourite banana flavour?
dude I just absolutely love banana flavour. Banana is my favourite flavour and also my favourite food of all time
#anti-honesty hour#banana makes me feel ill and i hate everything banana related#except!! ONE TIME#i had this fried banana fritter cake thing in indonesia#that shit. was downright TASTY#how can i possibly describe the fucking confusion i felt at tasting a banana flavour but liking it ??#my whole life has been banana hate#even just the smell makes me gag#i cant touch an unpeeled banana i have to compulsively wash my hands if i do#i wont sit next to unpeeled bananas#and yet. and YET#this fuckin delicious fritter cake..... blew my mind#it remains to this day the 1 and only time i ever liked banana#ok story time over
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yeah its definitely covid.
#⦻#emetophobia#if you've had covid before its that feeling you get its so... different#the pain is so unique in my chest area when i gag and hack up phlegm#it feels like someone hits me with something wide enough to cover my whole chest and bruise instantly#its so jarring and makes you feel like you're going to pass out after#idk just my experience. i remember wgat it was like last time i got covid and it feels the same. it feels the same :(#only this time instead of being so exhausted the fear of dying in my sleep is keeping me awake. when i finally get sleep its never much#and not for long#im scared#i hate this
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I can't eat spaghetti unsupervised.
#thought this would be funny out of context but if you want the story - read below.#I've had a stray noodle try to kill me twice within a span of two days.#20 years alive - never ince had any issue but suddenly my body decided that inhaling the noodles would be a fun new hobby#seriously was whole ass gagging on a noodle alone in my bedroom#it was fuckin' awful. i had to pull it out with my hands.#and my mom didnt hear a thinggg#so I decided maybe i shouldn't eat spaghetti alone anymore. for fear the third time will be the charm and it'll succeed in taking me out#vee's random thoughts go brr#vee's dumbass jokes
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too many males getting veneers when really they should be investing in hair transplants if anything
#you can clearly afford it & you are going to turkey for it anyway#& do NOT cheap out replace that whole scalp you never know how ruthless norwood is going to be on you else you get The Hair Band#just do it in one surgery#i advocate for teeth crookedness anyway i wish i could just yank out my braces to push my canines into yaeba i especially like#that thing people have where they teeth grow atop of others my cousin had that but the dentist just REMOVED them instead of realigning...#really makes me wish death on aesthetic dentistry STOP that madness.#i sincerely believe that teeth hold so much character & it genuinely pains me to see people get them replaced with chiclet piano keys#all straight & uniform uber white colored YUCK#honestly having thin hair as a male is a sign of genetic failure whereas misaligned teeth is not#at least you can fix that with braces that you will later take off ( when will it be my turn to... ) nothing added All You#it really sickens me to see just goes to show poor decision making skills. thin hair is infinitely more humiliating than “ugly” teeth#but there are situations where better teeth aremore of an improvement TBH if a man wants to self harm for looks go ahead IDC but ♯JustSayin#i wish you could have seen it but one time a classmate came to class to let our teacher know that he was leaving in the seventh grade#& she was like Erm why what excuse could you possibly have & he uncovered his mouth to reveal several of his teeth broken & missing#turns out he had them knocked out by an upperclassman who pushed him onto a pole while playing a game#i still laugh out loud whenever i remember it was so absurd literally the last thing i expected it was like a tom & jerry gag IRL#he was crazy rich so thankfully he got them all replaced like immediately but imagine being anyone in that situation. even the mom#i mean i felt bad for him that must have been so painful but i cannot help but burst into laughter whenever i remember
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Not being funny but that finale was SO MUCH BETTER than Steven Universe and SVTFOE combined. I will hear no slander on that final episode. It was a bit short but it provided complete character arcs and HOPE AND A FUTURE FOR THE CHARACTERS WE LOVE and I am so proud of that fucking show. Oh my god. First show I've seen in a long time that made good peace with its run being cut and handled it in a really good way.
#toh#AND THAT ONE BIT WHERE THE GRAVITY FALLS THEME WAS PLAYING DURING THE FIGHT SEQUENCE???#i was gagged icl#finale had me crying sobbing rolling around on the floor it was perfect and im so happy#ive stuck with over 12 shows through their whole runs and this was one of the best endings I've seen for a cartoon#i will never get over the lack of character arc for Helga Cutburn tho i wish we had time to explore her#the owl house#watching and dreaming#the owl house spoilers
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i must admit that despite playing my time at portia first i knew next to nothing about the world's lore when i first started sandrock, mostly because i wanted to give the spanish translation the benefit of the doubt and it ended up being... not very well done (this was like four? five? years ago, so it may already been fixed), so this time i played the game in english, still expecting that i would be less into the story and more into the mechanics of the game that were the reason i even bought it in the first place despite mtap's being barely comprehensible to me... boy was i WRONG
#like don't misunderstand me of course i love sandrock's gameplay#who wouldn't when it's portia's but literally better in every way possible#but the story this time HAD ME GAGGED#and the build-up to the invasion and the church members' betrayal#a mission that i didn't even want to do in the first place 'cause i thought it'd be boring as hell (when you help miguel plant the roses)#turned into one of the greatest pieces of foreshadowing and characterization in the whole game (i love miguel not as in i want to marry him#but as in man your ideology's so dangerous but you're SUCH A WELL-WRITTEN CHARACTER)#and that part of the plot where it's either making the portia-sandrock route or being basically send off to a settlement in the border#who'd inevitably be involved in the war between duvos and the allied cities#so you're stuck between a rock and a hard place#i could keep talking about the characters and their dynamics and how MUCH i like them but enough of my ramblings#my time at sandrock
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WHY are you yelling? he is literally right there lmao
#hannah is talking#kojak#makes you guys care about kojak#it's like a regular gag in this show where he shouts for someone to come into his office when they were clearly already standing like right#outside his office anyway. but the fact that you can actually see Bobby in the background the whole time just busted me up so bad I had to#make this edit about it lol
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went to the dentist to get fitted for a night guard so maybe i shall stop grinding my teeth into dust during the night, and discovered my upper jaw is comically larger than my lower jaw, to the point that my hygienist needed to call for backup and they ended up using a tray that was at least 3 sizes larger than the one for my lower jaw. happy to provide conversation topics for the break room
#good idea generator#also it hurt bc its lile the molars stretch outward at the back#but i cant like. open my mouth that wide or anything#so we just had to try to jam it in diagonally and align it properly once in my mouth#wish i could turn this into a euphemistic joke but unfortunately its just weird#abt the only thing i had going for me the whole time was that i didnt gag#but even then it was a lot of effort so not exactly an aspect i would draw attention to
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i think revolver ocelot is one of the best characters in anything ever
#everything that he is is just so ridiculous and yet every single double agent reveal had me gagged i’m ngl#revealing that he was a double agent at the end of mgs1? crazy#revealing that he was a triple agent at the end of mgs2? insane#revealing that he was actually adam and a double agent again in mgs3? ok we all called that one but good for him for sticking to his ways#revealing that he was actually a quintuple agent and brainwashed himself into thinking he was liquid snake so he could double cross Himself#in the name of world peace even though he’s been a seventeen-timing terrorist this whole time? fucking legendary if we’re being honest#he didn’t fucking do anything in tpp tho sorry. except love a dog and become a mother to hundreds of child soldiers#phantom pain was his mid life crisis ‘normal phase’ where he erased his whole personality in favor of Cowboy before#returning to being the real kelsey after leaving his 40s#and on top of all that he’s gay. can you imagine
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