#growing up with you eczema was the worst

[fragglez]

eczema sucks my hands are useless when I have cream on I'm only able to use my right thumb and pointer finger

[softpine]

working on the next post was frustrating me so i made more of coco's family to relax!! let's hear it for beautiful brown eyes

nico (33), nicole "coco" (23), monica (22), jasmine "jazzy" (18), amir (12), xena (1)

their family situation is very complicated but if you're interested:

nico was an oopsie when their mom was young. she got married and then quickly divorced nico's dad. coco looks up to her brother a lot. he's the kindest, most generous person you'll ever meet (gives you the shirt off his back kinda guy) and he loves coco so much, but he has an intellectual disability as a result of a complicated birth and he was never given the support he needed. he's had problems with substance abuse for a long time. growing up, coco always wanted to be around him, and unfortunately he didn't always do a good job of sheltering her. even though she doesn't blame him, he'll always blame himself for exposing her to his lifestyle.

when coco's mom met her dad, she didn't want to ruin things by getting married again. nevertheless, coco was planned. she was supposed to be the last baby (hence the cute matching names: nico and nicole).

monica came along so quick after coco that they were basically raised like twins, but coco was still very much a protective big sister to her because monica started losing her eyesight as a toddler. by middle school, she could only see light & shapes. she continued to go to the same school as coco, but she didn't get much in the way of accommodations, so coco was the one who helped her the most. she made sure monica never fell behind or felt different – she learned from nico that if she didn't support monica, no one would. they're the only 2 that share both the same birth parents, though monica always got along better with their dad than coco. oh also she's the sister that used to listen to danny's music fjkjsds

jazzy was from their mom's 2nd marriage which didn't last long. she spent summers with her dad in indiana, which made coco so jealous until she actually visited indiana herself lol. she goes to college at purdue so coco doesn't see her much. it also makes coco feel weird that they both started college at the same time though coco is 5 years older. she wants to be the big sister giving advice and helping jazzy through college, but jazzy has her life together more at 18 than coco ever has. she won't admit it, but she does judge coco for her life choices, and she has a lot of valid reasons for doing so. sadly jazzy had a front row seat to some of coco's worst moments. neither of them really know how to move on from that.

their mom is still married to amir's dad. he's the only kid still living with their mom. coco actually spends quite a lot of time with amir; he likes to stay at her apartment when he needs a break from his step siblings (who coco barely knows, since they moved in after she moved out). they also like to get out of the city and go exploring together / hiking

xena is....... complicated. she's the only one here that doesn't have the same birth mom and that's really all i can say. (btw i'm not bringing back the 2018 extreme red blush, the poor thing just has eczema)

[spaceacerat]

are these not normal? they were in your tags from this post

Hello! I wasn't sure if you mean blisters, or random moments of pain, so I'll assume both! I tried to separate the sections.

TW: medical neglect, medical abuse from doctors (I think it counts as that anyways, especially under the cut), mentions of skin-based injuries

(I apologize, this ended up turning into a scrambled medical rant because I have a lot of big feelings about how kids/teens/young adults can be completely ignored for even very noticeable signs of disability or issues and grow up suffering for it. I'm also just very tired and feeling weird and am in a ranty mood wanting my pain and suffering to be heard 😭)

BLISTERS:

On the case of blisters, I have little frame of reference for how often normal people blister, but my partners never seem to. Whenever I look into it, normal people apparently blister from shoes being too tight, or hiking or something very strenuous.

If your skin blisters with heat or certain fabrics, from wearing shoes even if they fit, clothing, sleeping, sitting, standing, or walking, or comes off easily from a mild bump into something, it is Not Normal.

My old PCP, when I finally asked him about it, was stunned, and did a biopsy when I had blisters I didn't have to pop. He thinks it's Epidermolysis bullosa simplex, but I can't get an official diagnosis without a genetic test that insurance doesn't cover apparently, and the dermatologist I went to was useless.

I would give advice on how to deal with it if anyone is ever interested, but what works for me probably won't work for everyone.

I don't know how it's supposed to be dealt with according to medical science, and I'm apparently (according to a partners nurse mother) very lucky I haven't gotten an infection. After all, I do it the broke person "here's my value pack of sewing pins and some paper towels" way, not the "I have access to medical resources and specialized sterile needles/bandages" way.

PAIN:

In regards to feeling pain most of the time, I've had one of my partners ask what level of pain I'm usually at, and I shrugged and went "Ehh, most of the time a 1-2, sometimes a pang of 3, a 4-5 if something specific hurts, at worst a 6-9 if somethings wrong like a migraine or whatever." He then wisely told me "You know what level normal people are at most of the time? A zero. Most people aren't in pain unless something is wrong."

I suppose that put things into perspective regarding my health, after years of just dealing with random bouts of sudden health issues I had to deal with usually completely on my own growing up.

(side note, watching something like lord of the rings as a kid, which involved a lot of scenes of them all just walking or running, would make me cringe because "holy shit they must be in so much pain :( they're so brave, and so strong for still walking and running for hours when they surely have blistered by now! I hope they have plenty of sewing needles to pop them when they stop to rest!" because my dumbass couldnt even walk around an amusement park for a day without limping badly and slowly while being told to hurry up by an older sibling, and these guys were walking and running for months on uneven terrain. Still jealous about that >:( )

(more ranting under the cut but about other things I've come to realize weren't normal [AKA specifics about the skin disorder/medical issues] or just makes me mad because suddenly I just feel the need to about my personal medical crap. Maybe someone will see it and see themselves in it. Sorry about that 😅)

in reference of the tag, I meant how I blister. I came out of the womb missing skin, and have always blistered around my body very easily. The docs claimed it was eczema when I was a baby, and they didn't bother looking into it further, but from the few people I have met who have that, they don't show any of my symptoms. Meanwhile I grew up thinking it was completely normal, and that everyone was just walking around in pain and ignoring it better than me.

I can't wear tennis shoes/heels/sandals/flipflops/crocs because the backs always rub my ankles raw and they're too soft so every step they rub around my toes, (or flip-flops would just tear the skin between my toes) but I had to grow up wearing tennis shoes all the time. That meant every night after school I'd come home and have to pop the blisters to drain them before I could sleep. Now I wear flat combat boots with two pairs of socks and it's so much better, but still not perfect, since I can't really walk outside in the summer.

I've blistered from walking, sitting, lying down, being outside in the heat, sweating, sleeping with my thighs touching, all sorts of things. Skin can also come off entirely if I get scratched or bumped into something. One time my leg got stuck at a bent angle because I fell asleep without popping the blister behind my knee, and it dried to the point where I couldn't pull it apart without pain.

Something else about that is that I'm allergic to adhesives and latex. The few times I've 'had' to wear bandaids were hellish, as it would remove the entire top layer of skin with it since it blistered under it. When I had to do an allergy test with the adhesive (dermatologist decided it had to be an allergy, because he's a dumbass), I made them cut them and put them on my arms instead of my back, where they promptly blistered after a few hours and I had to peel them off myself with a leather belt between my teeth to keep from chipping a tooth (because when I say it was incredibly painful, thats a massive understatement).

No one around me cared that I was suddenly having to lean against walls and furniture to get around because my legs wanted to give out from under me due to sudden muscle weakness and a pounding heart/chest pains/dizziness, or the few migraines I got in middle school that made me throw up a few times which weirdly made the migraine go away after enough times doing that. Or my limping from blisters, or the medication side effects that showed up when I started taking antipsychotics.

On note of medication, none of the psychs I went to told me about medication side effects. I was 13 when I started Seroquel (my guess is because they wanted to sedate me because of a whole fiasco, my partners nurse mother was shocked when she found out I was on it at such a young age for what were incredibly mild bipolar 2 symptoms). It caused me to pass out a few times, and I just had to keep taking it despite it actually making my depression/hypomania incredibly bad through the rest of middle and high school, because I wasn't aware I should tell my doctor it was making me worse. Never got bloodwork for it either.

After a while I switched meds, but was still having the worst depressive symptoms and my hypomania got even worse. One of the ones a doc had me try basically short circuited my brain. I had a five second memory if that, was shuffling around leaning against everything trying to stay upright, could barely think or talk outside of slurred words... My family saw this, and just went "You good?" and when I half-muttered a 'yeah' because I couldn't think straight enough to realize I should say no, they just shrugged and asked if I could do the dishes. I shook my head and went back to bed, passing out for 10 hours. Refused to ever take that medication again once I woke up, despite my psych trying to tell me I had to give it at least two weeks to start working properly. Fuck that.

When I show signs that something is wrong and I mention it to someone, and everyone brushes it off, it becomes normalized in the brain. But it's not. Now that I have partners who grew up going to the doctor for their problems, they're horrified, especially when they see me actively struggling with it. I had an episode (sudden muscle weakness/chest pains/pounding heart/dizzy) last month in front of them, and they were seriously debating taking me to a hospital but I kept refusing and saying it would pass because it always did and I wasn't afraid. It did eventually pass after about 7 hours, but not before scaring the shit out of them.

And these were the same signs I showed at work, twice, neither time I went home. I worked as a janitor during one of them, my manager saw but didn't think to do anything. I still managed to clean, but I did lie down and pass out in one of the back offices for a few minutes and just got up and went right back to work because I didn't want to get in trouble.

Also, a shout out to the laundromat I was forced to continue working at when I had covid!! I thought I was dying but they wouldn't let me take work off until I had a positive test, so I was forced to work the place completely alone for 8 hours during the first three days of major symptoms because I was desperate to keep the job and didn't know I could just refuse or call someone!! I mean, have you ever had to wash/dry/fold 200+ pounds of laundry completely alone in one night while every part of you thinks you're dying, and then on top of that having to deal with customers/machine issues, lift heavy trash bags, and clean dusty airvents and the rest of the place aka bathrooms and floors?? It's incredibly awful!! I did my damndest to keep my hands washed to the point where the skin came off a bit on one of my fingers and wearing a mask constantly while trying to keep my distance. Worst three days ever.

[phantom-heartbeat]

Does anyone with Cs/WCS wanna chat about it?

Does it feel like you're more of a zombie? A vampire? Something else?

Does it fluctuate or stay the same every episode?

What conditions do you have influence it and how (if any)?

What are the main and rare physical sensations?

What are tricks that help you? How did you find what works and what doesn't?

What makes it worse?

I'll start.

I often feel a mix of creatures, undead or generally nonhuman. But primarily zombie, vampire, siren or some sort of living dead thing that either isn't supposed to be on land or function like a living human.

It fluctuates a lot every episode, more often than not when I don't realize it is an episode i feel cybernetic or robotic, I'm only starting to recognize that as my more common episodes now. The more subtle ones at least.

My anemia, arthritis and other physical disabilities I have all effect it, but having DID means it can change and present differently based on who's fronting too.

My anemia makes me cold as a corpse most days, low blood circulation and pale complexion in top of being a walking icicle has made me a target for vampire comments growing up, my need for iron often feels like a thirst for blood. It can also feel like a hunger for flesh especially if I haven't eaten or slept properly when you take my Ed and insomnia into count.

The aches caused by my arthritis and chronic pain are more often than not soothed by water, making me feel like I need to go back to the ocean or sea to get out of this human skin and feel better and more free where my body is better suited. I often find myself violently scratching at my skin either because of eczema or something else which only contributes to the idea

That list goes on for a while

The main sensations are completely weighted like my body is just actual dead weight, heavy limbs and all, manual breathing switches on and my joints and limbs ache like they're going to fall off or are sore from being locked rigor mortis or because they're currently in rigor mortis. I'm not sure how to explain it but I'll also feel as if organs are missing.

There's also rarely ever feeling hunger and if I do it's cravings, not the sweet tooth kind, same with the need for other bodily functions.

Some rare feelings are a drill going through my head, not in the headache sense, my heart briefly stopping, things crawling on or under my skin, electricity running through my body and my teeth changing.

Tricks that sometimes help me are eating something, a snack or a meal just help me remember the body still needs it, checking for my pulse though it can be a hit or miss if the episode is really bad, and something cold like ice to shock my senses into resetting and waking up.

I found out most of them through anxiety attacks or times I felt really sick, I just kept using them because they seemed to help. There was a bit of trial and error, I found people reassuring me I'm alive and basically reality checking me doesn't help at all just makes me uncomfortable to be around them at worst and in one ear out the other at best. Often when someone tries giving me reassurance my brain treats it as a bold faced lie.

Mentally my depression and trauma or triggers all make the episodes worse, especially if I have trouble finding my pulse on my neck out of panic, or times I just can't taste things or my senses feel off. But overall times I feel sick are when my brain starts getting convinced I'm on my deathbed any second now or the body has finally given up.

I'm happy to answer any questions

What's it like for you?

[kurgy]

I use those excema cotton gloves while my hands healed with a stylus (though for me my hands would bleed alot so I'd also use them to put aquaphor on my skin underneath the gloves, since aquaphor/vaseline helps promote healing for cracked skin and THAT was what I'd pick at alot...if that is an ick in terms of texture I definitely understand that!)

If you have access to a Dermatology office I'd also reccomend seeking them too (but I am biased, I work at a Dermatology office that is well versed in it and honestly found better care than my therapists in terms of looking at my scars and how long to "wait" to let the skin heal. I know for me I'd pick off skin as it was growing back more than older scars, but ik your mileage may vary???)

Source: I have trichotillomania still and am in remission with dermatillomania (my lips, legs, feet, elbows) for over a year!!!

:0 ill look up some eczema cotton gloves!! ive had this like since i was a teen at least and ive had...flare ups? (is that the correct term?) where its just worse and harder to catch myself doing, this is probably just the worst its been

[russeliarat]

I hate how everyone expects me to get top or full marks on my exams and calls me talented and says that i have potential while pointing at the fact that I'm getting a low passing mark. Like you're literally contradicting yourself, you say I'm talented enough to achieve these high grades while pointing out the fact that I'm literally barely passing. And everyone's blowing it out of proportion too. They're saying that I'm never gonna get into college if I get a 4(passing grade) because colleges would rather have someone who got a 7 or 8 (very high grades), but I don't care. I seriously couldn't give the slightest fuck about education anymore. It's driven me to near insanity and I genuinely don't even want to stay in school until 18. I don't give a shit about jobs or money or opportunities or to be something big and make use of my potential, I just want to fucking live. No one's letting me be me, I always have to be better than me, and paired with the fact that everyone's simultaneously denying I have some kind of neurodivergenct and saying they're supposedly giving me all the additional support they can (they're not), it's completely wrecking me inside and out.

Mentally, this year has been the worst year for my mental health because of anger issues and anxiety and social issues and a general want to isolate. Physically, my unknown joint issues that are apparently just growing pains have gotten worse and its a chore to go up and down small flights of stairs and get from one building to another. I've had to start taking steroid medication inhalers because my asthma gotten worse from the stress. My eczema has come back on my face and its one of the most humiliating things because I look diseased. My hair is shedding far more than usual and my hair is usually thick but fragile. My chest and back and legs have been in more pain combined this year than when I had appendicitis.

I seriously just want to give up and become a hermit. I'm sick of life and I'd rather be contained in a little bubble as the family's next disappointment. I sobbed my eyes out over a badly formatted revision book tonight, I'm not emotionally stable enough to take on exams, let alone life, and all anyone has to say is to just be more resilient, as if I want to have the emotional maturity of a 10 year old. I'm tired and I don't care about my future anymore.

[thesulliedone]

Wait, a bagged vaccum is a luxury item?

Growing up those always seemed like the low price option and the ones without bags were the expensive once (atleast twice to four times the prices of a normal bagged ones it felt)

Yeah tbh same here, but it feels like things have flipped since bagless cyclones became all the rage in the 00s. You see a lot of bagless vacuums on the cheap, but from what I've seen from checks in the past a decent bagged vaccuum seems to be £150+ minimum at worst, and those are smaller capacity. Ofc you also have to factor in replacing bags which is an added cost.

From what I've seen, you see a lot more small bagless vaccuums on the cheap these days, that's what we currently use here, it's lightweight which helps cause I'm puny af and lugging around the old corded on the stairs was tiring. But god emptying either of them did not do me any favours on the rhinitis or eczema fronts T_T

[shelleymarietalks]

It's been a while... Again!

My last blog was at the start of 2023 and things weren't too bad where my skin was concerned and I have realised it has been nearly 8 months since I last blogged which is good, as I only ever really blog documenting the bad days. I know people don't read these and I am probably waffling onto myself but I thought I may as well blog even if it's just to document this for myself to read back on when days aren't as glorious because my skins behaving for once and I am happy with that!

So... How is my skin? I did take a bit of a dip after New Year having flares a little regular yet shorter and allowing it to really chew away at my mental health to the point I went back into the pattern of freaking out and trying to search for a cure and trying other creams and supplements to help until I finally gave up searching and calmed the hell down about it. My skin settled shortly after (I do ride these rollercoasters of sudden flares and then settle within days with no explination) and it wasn't until I had an issue at work causing me to have a weekend of stress and emotional upset that I knew 100000% that stress was definately my main trigger. Again, once this was resolved my skin calmed down.

I am still using Cerave Moisturising Cream and after ditching probiotics, Apple Cider Vinegar and Raspberry Ketone capsules that I was trialling, non of which really worked and gave my body a rest for a couple months I started taking Evening Oil of Primrose capsules. My Mom gave me these when I was a child growing up suffering with chronic eczema so it was worth a go again right? Well it's either a coinsidence or a massive help but my skin has been at it's best for a while and alongside this I have been having a weekly session on the sunbeds.

Sunbeds... There are lots of theories on wether these help and support skin conditions and wether or not they cause skin cancer. Some find even the word Sunbed scary and my Dermatologist hates the word, despite prescribing "Phototherapy" claiming this is not a sunbed and you do not tan. Phototherapy did not help my skin, in fact made it worst and I did in fact tan! I have 6-9mins per week on the sunbed and this has purely been due to going to Italy in 8 days for a family holiday/my cousins wedding and not wanting to burn in their heatwave. I have noticed the sunbed has really helped with the elasticity of my skin, has decreased the dryness and given me a lovely glow which I usually struggle to maintain with Eczema and TSW skin. Just to have that bit of a glow has made me look and feel so much better, making those shitty skin days more bareable so it is worth that bit of UV fear.

My Dermatologist. He's Marmite. You love him or hate him. I used to love him. The immunosuppressants that helped and I reccomend them to anyone suffering the worst of TSW as they give you just that bit of life back to help you cope, but even now when I go to my appointments at nearly 4 years steroid free and 3 and a half years immunosuppressant free and am still questioned why my skins still improving yet I'm not using the things hes prescribing me and am still refusing topical steroids, immunosuppressants and now jackinhibators which is some new thing! I could easily allow him to discharge me but with having an auto immune condition, history of severe eczema, topical steroid withdrawal and still picking up colds, sickness and infections easily I think to mysef it is just 20 minutes every 12 weeks and he has been learnt to presribe these. I sound like I am against steroids and immunosuppressants and if you'd of asked me last year then yes I would of said "of course I am" but I have slowly let go of some of my anger towards it all and have learnt that everyone is different, medication affects people in different ways and unlike me it may be the cure for some but just not for others and you know what... That is ok!

This was only meant to be a little skin update, a short blog and here I am an hour later.

Anyway, I will link the Cerave Moisturising Cream and Evening Oil of Primrose capsules that I continue to use and take in the hope these may help others too, just like I hope my blogs do, even if it's just 1 other person searching for some support and help.

Before I Leave I cannot forget the incredible TCM accupuncture with Omie that I have been having to help support my skin, hormones, emotions and stress and I cannot recommend it enough but feel this deserves it's own blog which I will do this weekend with some supporting information from Omie (if she kindly agrees).

Until then, lots of love xxx

[thebibliosphere]

Hi Joy! Saw you mention agonizing about getting a haircut in passing in a post. Can we have a hair update? Or what your agonizing about if you’re comfortable sharing?

PS please continue to bug us about Phangs. We love it and you 💛

Aw, thank you. I know I am most likely not annoying people with Phangs stuff. I just don't want to drive folks bonkers with it either lol. I am simultaneously my own biggest fan and my worst critic :P

And hair wise I actually booked myself an appointment this week! We'll see if I chicken out or not, but basically I am thinking of doing some sort of messy pixie cut.

I've been keeping my hair in a bob for the last 2 years while it was growing back in, and with some careful styling I was able to hide the patches where it didn't look like my hair would grow back. My hair is still thin in places and likely always will be, but it's no longer patchy and I have lots of new growth all over my scalp! The natural curl texture is also coming back too, so that's fun!

This does however highlight how scraggly my hair is past my ears and it's not a good look. I also developed a separate type of eczema on my scalp in the last year (just to keep things exciting lol), and need to wash my hair every day or my scalp starts to burn and my hair falls out. So y'know, that's a lot of washing, drying and when I don't want to look like I got dragged backward through a hedge, styling that I don't even like the look of when I'm done. And that's just energy I don't plain have.

Sooo... yeah. I am thinking of going full pixie cut so that it's something I can wash and dry in minutes instead of over an hour. And I'm aware it requires a lot of upkeep, but I used to get my hair trimmed every 6 weeks anyway before the pandemic, so that's not an issue for me.

I am however scared because change! Change is scary. But also I think some part of me just associates short hair with when all my hair straight up fell out due to illness, and I'm worried I'll just look sick rather than cute and idk. I am sitting with my emotions on that one.

I keep telling myself if I do it and I hate it, it'll grow out eventually. And in the meantime, there's always wigs lol.

[y0ur-maj3sty]

Each Astrological sign rules a body part. Depending on your Sun Sign, you may be susceptible to certain injuries/diseases in the certain part of your body that your sign rules more than others may be. This part of your body could be your strongest point or your weakest point. It could also be both at once. While your specific zodiac sign oversees an important part of your body, looking at the zodiac as a whole is like looking at your physical being as one complete, integrated functioning organism. In seeing the macrocosm of the heavens influence over one whole organic unit, the ancients devised the philosophy that the body is a sacred space reflecting the eternity of the cosmos manifested in the present.

Aries - The Head, Face, and Eyes. Aries are sharp and shrewd thinkers with lots of mental energy (thus why this sign rules the head). Common ailments of Aries are headaches, head congestion, and sinus problems. Due to excess mental energy Aries can overwork and also overthink themselves into mental strain. Eye strain and teeth problems are also common. An Aries can fight off an illness easily due to strong recuperative powers, and can also easily become red in the face if frustrated or excited.

Taurus - The Neck, Throat, Tonsils, Vocal Cords. Taurean women are known to have beautiful skin around the collarbones and neck. Both Taurean men and women are known to have great singing voices and beautiful harmonious, strong speaking voices. Many are susceptible to neck injuries and earaches. They can also be susceptible to weight problems and back strain.

Gemini - Arms, Shoulders, Hands, Lungs. Geminis are gifted with beautiful hands and strong arms. They often tend to be good at sports and dancing because they are well-coordinated. When stressed they have difficulty breathing, and are prone to bronchitis and asthma. They have a tendency to acquire sprains and fractures in the arms and shoulders. Geminis are often high strung, which can cause them anxiety and nervousness.

Cancer - The Breasts, Stomach. Women of Cancer tend to have beautiful breasts, since their sign rules this body part. Cancerian men have flat stomachs and broad chests. As Cancerians grow older, they put on weight that is harder to lose. They are susceptible to emotional stress, tension, and anxiety. Due to having a delicate stomach, they are prone to digestive problems, gas, nausea, etc. Because they are a water sign, Cancers can overindulge in alcohol which makes their stomach upsets even worse.

Leo - Back, Spine, Heart. Leos have strong spines, good coordination, and big hearts. Many are excellent athletes and dancers as well. Leos can overexert themselves due to the need to excel in everything they do, and the upper back is the part of them that tires the easiest. Pain and pressure is common around the heart. Heart problems can occur later on in life. To avoid heart attacks in later life, Leos must learn to slow down and stop overexerting themselves.

Virgo - The Nervous System, Intestines. Virgos are intuitive and discriminating due to a finely-tuned nervous system. Virgo’s worst enemy is anxiety, nervous tension, and emotional stress which comes the easiest to them. Many end up literally worrying themselves sick. Most physical ailments are intestinal. Indigestion, ulcers, liver upsets, gas pains, etc. are common because of weak digestive systems. They are also prone to skin problems due to the nerves. Many Virgos are hypochondriacs, also due to their delicate nervous system.

Libra - The Kidneys and Buttocks. Women of Libra have graceful lower spines and curvy buttocks, and the men have well-shaped strong backs. They are known for good bone structure and pleasing features, although they have sensitive skin. Libras are prone to lower back pains, kidney ailments, and skin conditions such as eczema.

Scorpio - The Genitals. Scorpios are the most sexual sign of the zodiac, and a lot of their energy is stored in the area of the sexual organs. Scorpios are highly sexed and very passionate. A healthy sex life is detrimental to Scorpio’s well-being. Many will use anger in a sexual way, using sex as a weapon. When they suppress intense feelings or sexual frustration, they tend to display erratic and crude behavior. Many are susceptible to problems of the genitals, such as STDs, venereal diseases, urinary infections, etc. Scorpios also have the highest susceptibility to a dangerous, unexpected death.

Sagittarius - Hips, Thighs, Liver. Sagittarians are very active, and will become ill and have bad health if they don’t get regular exercise. Both men and women have strong, well-shaped legs and are very graceful, well-developed, and coordinated. Most are slender and lean in their youth but tend to put on weight later on, especially in the hips and thighs. Chronic aches, fractures, bruising, and sprains are also common in these areas. The liver is extremely sensitive and can suffer instantly from alcohol overuse.

Capricorn - Bones, Joints, Knees, Teeth. Capricorns have lovely bone structure and beautiful, straight teeth. The women are very photogenic due to their angular beauty. Capricorns are known for their longevity, and are capable of withstanding illness and stress because they have vigorous and enduring constitutions. Their health seems to always get better. Although their bones, knees, and joints are prone to accidents, bumps, cuts, bruises, and fractures. Stiff joints and arthritis are also a problem. Intense worrying can also cause strain, as Capricorns are known for that.

Aquarius - Circulatory System, Shins, Calves, Ankles. Aquarians are strong and healthy, with strong ankles and they are also coordinated. They are more mentally active than they are physically, and tend to put on weight. Their health will take drastic turns for the worse and just as quickly reverse again, and their illnesses come without any reason. Swelling occurs in the ankles and lower legs the most for Aquarians. They’re also prone to varicose veins and cramps. Injuries are more frequent on the shins, calves, and ankles than anywhere else. Many suffer from a hardening of the arteries, low blood pressure, and anemia. Aquarians are also prone to frostbite because cold weather is harder on them.

Pisces - The Feet and Toes. Pisceans are known for their well-shaped and graceful feet. Many tend to be dancers. They also have an acute sense of smell. They are vulnerable to sinus trouble, colds, and water retention in the body. Their feet are a common source of trouble for them and they have trouble with jobs that require hours of standing. Corns and bunions are common and they have trouble finding shoes for their sensitive feet. They are also prone to athlete’s foot and other fungal infections. Bruised and broken toes are common. Like we all know, Pisces are also easily influenced by alcohol and drugs.

[raisingsupergirl]

She’s Got a Lip Fungus They Ain’t Identified Yet

Parenting is full of deep, joyful moments. Moments that change a person. Moments that make life worth living, like the ones I wrote about last week. But that doesn’t mean it’s all sunshine and bliss. Some things just downright suck. And I’m not talking about the whining, the behavioral issues, the disciplining. Those are the things I expected—the things I signed up for. No, I’m talking about the other things. The terrifying things. The things that make me feel like I have no control, that I’m failing as a father. I’m talking about injury and illness. And my seven-year-old Avery has a real talent for these things.

Thankfully, she must have a decent immune system, because she doesn’t often come down with colds and whatnot. But she gets hurt all the time because she’s floppy like dear old dad. From her severe concussion several years ago to her multiple elbow dislocations, she’s always falling over and hurting something. But that’s not even the worst thing. No, the worst thing is that her skin sucks. Yes, her skin. She doesn’t have psoriasis or eczema or anything, but her epidermis gives up faster than her opposing soccer team did this past weekend. Seriously. Mosquito bites cause mountainous welts. She breaks out in hives at random times, especially when she happens to be running a fever, and she’s had ringwork more times than I can count. Oh, and then there’s this most recent thing…

It started out as what looked like a pimple on her face, pretty much the first day of school in a new district. Every girl’s worst nightmare, right? Well, it gets worse. And I mean that literally. One bump became two, and slowly it crept down to her chin, and then she got a spot on her eye. Within two weeks, she also had a spot on her leg, and all of it was growing. “Why didn’t you take her to the doctor sooner!?” Shut up. Like you’re the world’s best parent, or something? Stuff like this is weird. It happens so slowly. You assume it’s going to go away. Then you look at your perfect little angel one morning and realized she’s being consumed by a flesh-eating virus. Well, bacteria, actually. One trip to Convenient Care diagnosed it as impetigo. Oops. But a $60 bottle of antibiotics kicked those critters right in the teeth, so to speak. Within a week, her sores started healing. And even if Avery complained about the awful taste, she squealed with joy the morning she took off her bandage and saw that it was getting better. Though, in that moment, my heart broke a little.

Up until then, I hadn’t realized how self-conscious she was about it. I mean, she’s only seven. She’s so focused on external things (her new cat, exploring the creek, etc.) that it’s hard to see the things she’s struggling with internally. And even though she prayed most nights that her face would get better, this one just didn’t register with me until I saw the absolute joy in her eyes when she realized she was healing. Thankfully, she didn’t have any emotionally scarring moments—no coming home crying because some bully made fun of her or anything. But I can’t help feeling awful for not paying more attention to her.

Like I said, parenting comes with its ups and downs, and most of them are go much deeper than the skin. Like, where did she get this impetigo? It likely came from one of two places—either playing in the aforementioned wet-weather creek or cuddling with her aforementioned new cat. So, I’m danged if I do and danged if I don’t, but I’m not about to deprive her of either of those things. No, I’ll choose the lesser of two evils, the one that brings her inner joy with the risk of external pain. Especially since a $60 bottle of antibiotics is way cheaper than years of therapy…

Wait, did I say $60? I meant $105. You know, because we just found a sore on her little sister’s leg, too. Parents of the year, right here. Remember to get your autographs.

[mari-vargas]

Hey, I’ve got a weird one for you today. I want to tell the story of my favorite bully from when I was a kid.

Ya, like I said it’s a weird one.

I was bullied a lot growing up. I was quiet and didn’t really fight back over it. Honestly for the most part I didn’t care. It always felt worse for me when I tried to fit in, and I never succeeded anyways so basically my choices were “be comfortable and be made fun of for it” or “be uncomfortable and be made fun of for failing to do it right”.

Now I also have some blocked memories from bullying, so I can’t really speak to those, and I only know they exist because of an unconscious reaction to one bully approaching me and calling my name from behind while I was visiting my friend at my old school. This story is not about that however.

This is about the clique at the school I attended after that one. They were a group of mean nasty girls with money who’d pick on girls without, or would pick on you for going through puberty at a different rate than them, or for your opinion on who’s cute and who’s not or what should constitute a crush. They’d also pick on you for physical problem. One girl in our class was on crutches for months with a boot on one foot, and unfortunately she was already a target for this group because she wore her hair short and had started puberty long before anyone else (before I’d even started at this school).

There were two (and after one particular incident my opinion changed to three) especially mean girls, who I will refer to as K and M (the third is C). They would tear you down over every little thing. The thing about being the kind of kid I was, though, is that when someone is going somewhere to breakdown alone, they don’t really notice the quiet kid already occupying the hiding space due to their only two friends having a year long row with each other they didn’t have any business getting dragged into. As such I know that K, M, and C all had absolutely horrendous mothers, C had an unhealthy obsession with pleasing her father, K and M didn’t have great situations with their fathers (likely distant and mostly uninvolved), and K had some odd situations involving older siblings, and all three had stupidly high expectations placed on them—not about grades, but about appearances. So ya…I fully admit to doing the stupid thing and getting them to direct all their attention toward me and off of that one girl and away from my “friends” even though they’d basically disowned me. Because I mean really, I didn’t care what they had to say to or about me, their toxic opinions couldn’t really reach me. My friends on the other hand definitely tore me down. Their opinions did matter to me. So ya I was in a rough spot because of my “friends” and other stuff happening in my life but the bullies’ words really didn’t matter to me so I took it all on.

But this story also isn’t about me trying to say “ah yes I was strong against bullying ha ha ha!” I wasn’t, I just know that even back then I could tell whose actions were gonna affect me more. This is about one of the things the clique girls singled out on me and would’ve succeeded in actually tearing me down further than I’d ever been (again, in existing memory, because I have no clue what’s in those blocked memories and I don’t plan on ever disturbing them).

I have eczema, and a lot of triggers for it. The worst trigger to deal with though is stress. It’s not something I can remove like sugar or Red 40, it’s not something I can wash away like dust, not something I can soothe away with lotion and lots of water like dehydration. I have anxiety. Basically I’m always stressed. But anyways that year was a really rough year, with my friends fighting and my parents almost getting divorced and this was before my “twin” got her own phone so I had no reliable way to talk with her and my sister had just started driving… so I had my huge unavoidable trigger, plus this was before (or rather more specifically this was THE year) we discovered I was allergic to Red 40, and and and… Point is I had an extremely bad eczema outbreak. I’d always get it the worst on the back of my upper thighs. It was so bad that just to prevent it from getting worse while sitting in class, we had to tape these large patches of gauze over them. This school had a uniform and quite frankly the material for the bottoms was pretty uncomfortable to move in in the form of pants and shorts, so I often wore these pleated skirts my dad and I sewed because the pleats gave way more room to move.

So I’m wearing this skirt, with the gauze taped to the back of my thighs, and I’m out on the playground about to attempt the monkey bars (and being fully aware I’d fail, but I’d already finished like three books that day and it was only lunch and the monkey bars were at least still far enough away from where my friends were loudly arguing). M and K take notice that I’m gonna do something worthy of being mocked over so they gather their clique and bring them over to strike. C had been egging my friends on, but reluctantly was dragged away—reluctant that is, until she caught sight of something peculiar on the back of my thighs. So she called it out, jeeringly, “what’s that?” pointing at the gauze. So I tell her, simply, that it’s gauze. M rolls her eyes and joins C in sneering “why’s it taped on your legs?” So I tell them I have eczema and it’s pretty bad right now so it’s covered to help prevent it from getting worse. M asks what eczema is, so I start to explain “it’s a rash—“ only to be cut off by M and C loudly yelling “ew! It’s contagious your contagious you’re gonna give us all your rash” etc etc. K had been looking uncomfortable at the start of this which was unusual because usually it wasn’t C jumping in like this with M, it was usually K. I was trying to cut in to what M and C were yelling to explain that it wasn’t contagious, but again I was a quiet kid. I couldn’t cut people off, it was basically physically impossible for me at this time. But I wound up not needing to. Right when I was noticing that K wasn’t participating and was even looking uncomfortable, her discomfort transformed into determination. She cut off M and C and told them in no uncertain terms about how eczema was an autoimmune disorder transferred genetically and was in no way contagious and there was no way I could have prevented my own body from attacking me. She told them all that she had a cousin with bad eczema and that this was absolutely not something they could target to pick on me over. She then followed that up with a jibe at my lack of arm strength and my tiny feet, as though to demonstrate acceptable things to mock me over.

It might be a little stupid, but at that moment when everyone turned to mocking me for how small I was and how bad I was at climbing, I was so happy. So relieved. Because to this day I can’t stand to look at the back of my thighs, fully believing they are still covered with thick gnarled scar tissue. Because any attention brought to my eczema always made the itching and burning worse. Because any time my eczema worsened I felt horrible and that it was my fault for not being better at ignoring it. K stood up for me and saved me from the worst instance I can remember of a bully’s words actually getting to me. They didn’t stop going after me for it, but they had to do it quietly or else K would come down on them with all her righteous fury. I don’t think I ever got any physical attacks after that incident either and I know none of them wanted to touch me, still claiming I was contagious, but after that first time it didn’t bother me as much because I knew at least one of them understood.

K changed after that. She seemed to start noticing what people were truly bothered by and what they didn’t really care about, and she’d redirect mocking towards the unimportant things.

I left that school at the end of that year, but the next year apparently things in the social scene there went even worse. Remember my fighting friends? Ya that didn’t stop after just one year. Remember how C had been egging them on? She had gotten one of the other clique girls to support one while she backed the other. Soon enough, the whole clique had divided to back one or the other of my ex-friends—people they had mercilessly bullied for years and were now claiming to be besties with. I don’t know what exactly happened with K. Could’ve been something with volleyball or cheerleading. Could’ve been something with the bullying. Could’ve been a change in financial situation. But a year or two after I left she was booted to the curb from the clique. Full cold shoulder and then some.

She wanted to go to the fair, but as I mentioned her family situation was dismissive at the best of times. Her mother finally relented and said she could go IF she found someone to go with because they certainly didn’t have time for something so frivolous. She tried everyone and was shut out at every bend. Until, that is, she came across my phone number in her contacts from that brief time I was on the volleyball team because they didn’t have try outs that year because they almost didn’t have enough people for a team the year prior. So in a last ditch attempt, she messaged me to see if I’d be willing to go to the fair with her. And I thought back to that day she stood up for me, and how she had started redirecting her friends attention away from true land mines, and I went to my parents asking if I could meet a friend at the fair on that particular night. Because she needed a friend, even just for a night.

When we got there, she was all alone outside the front of the fair entrance. No family in sight. They had dropped her off and left. She was straining her neck around the crowd. I waved and ran up to her. She started crying as soon as she’d spotted me. She blubbered out her situation with her once friends and how she wouldn’t have been surprised if I hadn’t shown up because of how she used to treat me and so on and so forth. After she had calmed down we went to the fair and had a great time and I got to see a little spark of light return to her eyes.

So ya, she bullied me, and wound up getting exactly that in turn, but she also stood up for me at one of my worst moments, and I apparently did the same for her.

A year later and M for some reason invited me to a Halloween party she was throwing. I decided to go, and well that was basically the last time I ever spoke to my ex friends from that school. I was picked on by M and C and their cronies old and new while I was there and I decided that ya there was no need for me to be there and I called for a ride and left while there was still probably another 2-3 hours left of the party.

[13pinkcupcakes31-blog]

Covid Vaccine and Autoimmune Disease

I'm not sure how many other autoimmune sufferers are out there like myself that was assured the benefit outweighs the risk. After much thought, researcher, and what feels like a sick game of Russian Roulette...I took the plunge. Myself and oldest 2 kids got the first dose August 19th and the second August 25th. I was told the second vaccine was the worst by far regarding side affects so I wasn't expecting to feel what I felt. Within 2 hours of getting the first vaccine I became lethargic. So beyond tired I honestly don't remember much for that evening at all. I know I went to bed somewhere around 8 pm which is insane because my usual bedtime is between 4-5 am. Well I woke up around 3:30 am with extreme muscle soreness like I had done a killer workout. I was very parched and woozy feeling. I don't read side affects about anything because seriously I'll just make yourself paranoid. So I was told the best course of action was acetominophen and vitamin c. I received this advice from just about everyone who had the vaccine. No one that I knew had any side effects from the first dose. So about 12 hours post vaccine and I developed a large blistery sore on the injection site which continued to grow and spread for about 5 days before it started to diminish. I had a fever of 102 for the first 7 days as well. I think the worst part of it for me was my immune system was definitely trying to fight the vaccine but inevitably it started attacking itself instead. I ended up with thrush, yeast infection, and abscesses in my mouth. I also have dyshidrotic eczema which of course went crazy as well. So now my body is fighting itself so my inflamation was thru the roof. I have Lupus and Hashimotos Disease. These combined autoimmune diseases make everything very difficult to heal from end even harder to stay relatively healthy. Lupus by itself is literally a mind blowing disease. How there are so many different types and how they affect each person. Personally my Lupus has been attacking my joints and bones since early teens but wasn't diagnosed until I was 32 years old. I'm not sure why no one checked to see why at the age of 15 I needed a total shoulder replacement. They were convinced I had to have a traumatic event to cause that much damage. Which was definitely not the case at all. I was chronically dislocating my should by doing simple things like pointing and and swimming. I was actually asked if I dislocated my shoulder on purpose. If you have ever had a dislocated shoulder you know that excruciating pain that it entails. So I was shocked and angered that they were questioning why It dislocated so many times. In the years proceeding I had several other surgeries. I fell down walking up a flight of stairs when I was 26 and I hit my elbow on the landing. I was in pain but waited 24 hours to see a doctor thinking it was probably a muscle strain. They took x-rays of my shoulder and arm and revealed I had broken my shoulder in 2 different spots when I fell and hit my elbow. Again no one found this irregular and never tested me for anything even knowing my history. The same week as my shoulder I broke my hand, and dislocated my knee. Still no one found this odd except social services who assumed I was getting beat up by my Husband. I have gotten way off topic of the covid vaccine but I am trying to explain all the aspects of why I think that people who have autoimmune diseases should be monitored by a doctor after getting the vaccines because it will inevitably give you some terrible side affects. I know they don't really know how the vaccine is going to affect anyone in different demographics and we are the guinea pigs. So now the second vaccine was obviously the worst. So we al got the vaccine at around 5:30 and didn't stick around like we were supposed to because if something happened in the pharmacy they would have called an amb ulance and what would they do with the kids while I was in there. I know my husband wouldn't leave work early so I decided it would be better just to get home

because at least I know where the kids are and they are comfortable in their own home. Wow I seriously just drag these blogs out .... if your still reading ... i'm sorry. So the second vaccine I thought was going to kill us all and no im seriously not being dramatic. Laila, Samir, and I developed fevers over 102 mine being the highest at 103.7. I felt like somone took a meat grinder to my organs. I had stomach cramps, fever, extreme fatigue, and such a bad migraine. Which now that I think of I also got with the first vaccine. We felt like death for the first 48 hours straight but thankfully we started feeling better on day 3. If anyone is planning to get the vaccine stock up on acetominophen, vitamin c, Gatorade or other electrolyte type beverage. Drink lots and lots of fuids and just plan ahead 3 days that you won't be able to do anything other than fitfully sleep. If anyone has and specific questions please don't hesitate to ask.

[orcinus-ocean]

I am watching hours worth of ex-vegan “interviews” or testimonials, so you don’t have to.

I link to each one so you can see them for yourself, but I wrote down the important points of each one, since I believe this is not just important, but vital information. This could save people’s lives, if they just stop and think and look at another perspective before they go into it.

These are real people. They really wanted it. They really knew what they were doing. They weren’t “doing it wrong”. These are their experiences.

Ex-Vegan (8 Years): Veganism Is a Teeth Rotting, Muscle Atrophying, Degenerating, Fart Fest

A young man with a lot of health issues including severe eczema, got into veganism to get healthy

He had previously been living the typical “college” lifestyle with lots of fast food, no health-thinking at all

For the first year or two, he felt amazing, he did fine for four years, had a successful YouTube channel talking about skin health and the vegan diet

Emphasizing how “literally obsessed” he was with his dental hygiene and health, four years into veganism, his teeth were deteriorating and every time he visited the dentist, he had to have a root canal, he had cavities, infections, receding gums, always something

He was always bloated with a visibly bloated belly

Despite being a very health-focused athlete, his muscles wouldn’t grow the way they should

His skin started going “grey” and his hair lost its rich color

His memory and ability to focus deteriorated

He completely lost interest in food - everything “disgusting”

Feeling a craving for protein, he upped the high-protein vegan foods, and he only felt worse and worse

After realizing this diet was making him sick, he took one bite of salmon and “it was like taking drugs” - clear, physical reaction to it, and compared to the plants giving bloating and gas, “it felt like I was eating nothing, but I had so much energy”

After going back to eating animal protein (as much wild fish/meat as possible), his weight corrected itself, strength in the gym went “off the charts”

The pain and irritation he had on the vegan diet went away

His gums went from white pink to red, “right away”

Digestion issues - gone, hormonal issues - gone

“Since I’ve been eating animals, I feel more humble and more gentle towards animals, I feel more respect towards them, and I feel like I understand the cycles of life and appreciate life even more”

He says the vegan diet can help people to “clean out the body” as it did for him, but veganism, he doesn’t understand. “If your mom was on her death bed, and she had the choice: Die a horrible, painful death, or eat salmon, you would want your mom to die a horrible death rather than eat salmon. I’m asking this to vegans, and a lot of them are like ‘Under no circumstance would I ever have my mom or anyone I know, eat salmon, because it’s killing an animal, it’s abuse’. And I’m like aren’t humans animals?”

“I view the vegan diet as a disease-reversal protocol, not as a ‘forever diet’.”

Ex-Vegan Family: (6+ Years): "Healthy" Vegan & Vegetarian Dogma Depleted Health and Vitality

Casey vegetarian/vegan for ~15 years

Did it to try to clear up his eczema and staph infections (which were so bad the doctors wanted to amputate his legs), didn't really work

He did feel great for the first few months as a raw vegan, but looking back, he believes it was more due to cutting out grains and processed foods, since he found grains are terrible for him

Lost a lot of weight, rotting teeth, reoccuring cavities

Gina became vegan at the age of 13, being a picky eater and caring about animals

The "readymade" vegan food wasn't doing well for her, so she started eating only raw vegan food

She felt really good - for about six months. After six months, a very severe depression, accompanied by brain fog, lack of mental focus, constant hunger, weight loss and joint pain, kicked in

She believed so hard that this had to be right, that she stayed a vegan for 6 years, before introducing dairy

At the age of 17, after four years on veganism, developed a cancerous tumor on her leg (not necessarily connected, but worth noting)

Five years into veganism she was pregnant, and began craving red meat - they started buying local dairy, meat, liver and eggs

After the baby, she went back to raw veganism, and the joint pain came back, "it's detox"

She instead went back to being vegetarian rather than raw vegan, but she still suffered from worsening joint pain, fatigue, brain fog

A couple of years later, she was pregnant again and she was craving red meat so much she even dreamt about it

Her conclusion was "I must be doing it wrong, I must just eat more of the high-protein vegan food"

For her third pregnancy, she stayed vegan, and the birth was the hardest one she had

The baby had the lowest birth weight of the three, still normal weight, but later, he wasn't gaining weight normally

The child couldn't sit up at six months, couldn't walk at a year old, was depressed, only learned to walk after they gave him meat, and he finally became happy

Then on her fourth pregnancy, she was not vegan for the first half, but went back to raw vegan on the latter half of the pregnancy, and this child was healthy

On raw veganism at the end of the fourth pregnancy, her teeth were "falling apart", her bones were aching, and she was so foggy she couldn't think or remember anything

At the end of her pregnancy, she hadn't gained any weight, just stayed the same

Her teeth were full of cavities, despite having been to the dentist and "fixed everything" just some months prior

They could never manage raw fruit more than six months at a time, constant hunger

They believed the constant hunger could be due to parasites, so they ate anti-parasitic herbs which only made things worse

When she stopped eating vegetables (only fruit?), she got skin rashes as well

When they went back to meat, they felt full for the whole day, while on raw veganism, they had to eat all the time and were still always hungry

At the time of filming, they were completely off veganism for four months and she feels like her brain has "grown", she has energy, can exercise again, is gaining muscle

Ex-Vegan (4 Years): How Veganism Shortened My Lifespan

Started veganism as a New Year’s resolution to turn his life around, after living “like a degenerate”

He started with a month-long juice fast, where he felt great

On the first year as a “whole foods vegan” (mainly raw), he suffered from loss of libido, insomnia, migraines, arthritis, couldn’t build muscle

After a year, he went back to a diet of white rice, lean meat, bone marrow and occasional red meat

This diet immediately got his libido and muscle growth back

After some time, peer pressure made him drop the meat, but he still ate eggs

The vegans around him told him “if you continue to eat meat and dairy, you will not be able to ascend and channel divine guidance”

One of them was a nutritionist, and when he told her veganism destroyed his health, she said that he needs to be on 80/10/10, a fruit-based diet

He stayed on it for five months, and it was “the worst 4-5 months of my life”

He went on another vegan diet, based on sprouts, sea vegetables and algae, and a bunch of supplements

Same problems - lack of libido, insomnia, lack of muscle, migraines, cracking joints

A friend who saw him for the first time in years said “you look like one of those kids in the refugee camps”, because his face was so sunken-in

His friend eventually convinced him to go with him to a steakhouse, and he describes the first bite he took as “the fat going straight into my brain” and he felt “like a dying wolf”

He gorged on 2-3 pounds of fatty meat, slept for twelve hours, and his friends told him he immediatly looked like a completely different person

His cracking joints, dry skin and insomnia went away

Still, he went back to veganism, and all the problems came back

He went back and forth between raw veganism and primal diet every 2-4 weeks, rebuilding on an animal-based diet, deteriorating on a plant-based diet, always thinking “this time I will make it work”

He had to give up aiming for optimum health as a vegan, instead aiming for just “normal stability”

Staying at an old vegan institute managed by one of the creators of his sprouts-algae-supplements diet, doing a colonic, the worker there admitted to him most of them there are not vegan, because they fall apart on it, but go on a primal diet

During the colonic, the worker pushed his liver, and he felt “fire” going down his intestines. What came out was all green, spirulina, algae and other such supplements, which had simply stored in his liver

He speaks a lot about studies on different “uncivilized” peoples around the world, who were all eating high amounts of animal fat, wherever they lived

At the end, he speaks of where veganism might be coming from, and the lie that veganism is good for the environment

His message to vegans is to “quit bothering and harassing people”, and that if you care about animals, go buy cheap land in Arizona and make an animal shelter or something, instead of bullying people who eat meat

Ex-Vegan (2 Years): Vegans Have No Empathy for Humans

Vegetarian for six years, before going vegan

Ate mainly raw vegan, and then her stomach became “an empty, vacant hole”, she was always hungry

Throughout her time on veganism, she was taking lots of supplements

Her skin dried up, she got acne all over her face

She became “emotional and neurotic” and “absolutely insane” from a lack of B12

A lot of talk about the cult mindset in the “vegan community”

Starting to eat eggs again, she felt “a little bit better”, but still felt hungry all the time

Panic attacks over tiny things, anemia, constant diarrhea

Started eating fish, it didn’t help much

She was always hungry but had no appetite, had to force-feed herself

After a particularly bad day, she realized she was risking her life, and ate steak the next day

Eating steak for the first time in years, she felt warmth throughout her body, tingling on her head, and “satiated” for the first time in years, “it changed my life”

Ex-Vegan (12+ Years): Veganism Is Starvation - Fruitarianism Is Suicide

Started in 2002 as a vegetarian for a year before going vegan, became raw vegan from 2009-2011, then went on to fruitarianism until 2015

She says many feel great the first year or so on veganism, because they cut out all the junk from their diet

She had digestive issues prior to becoming vegan, thought it might help, but it only got worse and she got sicker as the years progressed

After six years and only getting sicker, she thought it must be the drugs for her health issues, "I'm doing it wrong", or "my body is wrong"

(They talk about some very interesting "meat and milk causes cancer"-studies four minutes in)

She said the raw vegan years were the worst of her life, that her brain “stopped functioning”. She became "permanently psychotic", she "saw hell" and heard voices - conclusion: "oh, it's detox"

When she stopped veganism in 2015, she had a test done on her hair. They said they had never seen that much heavy metal in someone's hair before

She had been doing nothing but "cleansing" and "detoxing" for the past five years, and she was "the most toxic, sick person you'll ever meet"

She was “literally dying” towards the end, freezing cold all the time, her bones hurt so much she couldn't lay on a hard surface

She couldn't digest anything but fruit anymore, it took two years of quitting raw veganism until the point where she could digest vegetables and meat again

Her teeth had to be all "redone", because they were rotten to the roots, her hair was falling out

She was told that on this fruitarian diet, it will feel like hell for 2-3 years, because of the "detox", then they will feel great, like godlike beings

But since 2-3 years passed and people still felt awful, their "leader" changed that to "people are so sick today, the detox will take 5-6 years!"

This also didn't happen, people stuck for 5-6 years and only got sicker, so the story changed to "7-8 years, then you will feel great!"

Her comment: "You can't be a herbivore and be healthy. If you want to have a life of mental illness and an early death and degeneration, go be vegan."

Many of these people have also spoken of how many well-known names in the vegan/raw/fruitarian communities (from YouTubers to authors) are known “cheaters” who eat meat frequently in order to stay healthy, while lying to their audiences and telling them to stay vegan.

These were only five. I will do more of these posts, to keep them at a readable length.

[vindicatedvirgil]

only fools rush in / part four: we deserve happiness, too

WHOAH HEY SLOW DOWN! have you read parts one, two, and three yet? no? go do that and then come back. it’s fine. i’ll wait.

okay now for those of you who are all caught up, it’s Sunday, so that means a new chapter!! this chapter is focused on Janus and Logan and (hopefully) it will answer some of your questions about timelines and stuff.

this is my first time writing about a queerplatonic relationship, so if i messed up in any way please let me know (they’re also both aromantic but they are not ace and this is important to note okay cool).

TW: mention of sex (no descriptors though), mention of suicide attempt

read to the end for the title of part five as well as a teaser~

Logan sat at their usual table at the café, his laptop in front of him as he typed quickly. With every opening of the door, the bell above it dinging annoyingly, he glanced up, but found himself disappointed when he didn’t see his partner. He worried that Janus’ oolong tea would grow cold as he took a sip of his own black coffee, and turned his focus to the research paper he was working on. Eventually, he felt Janus’ lips press to his cheek and then his body slid into the booth to the left of him.

“Sorry that I’m late, Lo. Virgil was having a rough night and I needed to make sure he was going to be okay,” he explained, picking up the mug of tea in his hands and taking a sip. Janus made no indication that the tea was too cold or hot, he just smiled before pulling his own laptop out of his bag. “How’s the paper coming?”

“Almost done, just need to edit the footnotes,” Logan responded plainly, taking another sip of his coffee. It was almost to the point where it was too cold to drink, but he needed the caffeine if he wanted to finish his work for the weekend. “Is Virgil going to be okay now?”

“I think so. Roman was arriving to practice for the auditions as I left, though I don’t think he saw me, he seemed pretty focused as he ran up the stairs,” he responded, starting to type on his laptop. “Have you eaten anything, Lo? You can’t just have coffee.”

“I’m not hungry,” the taller man responded, pushing his glasses up further on his nose. Janus frowned, then slid out of their booth and walked over to the main counter. Logan sighed, switching tabs to his research notes. He skimmed for the information he needed and by the time he had inserted a quote into the main paper, Janus had returned with two muffins; one blueberry, one banana nut. Logan wanted to ignore the grumble in his stomach but he knew Janus would bug him until he ate something, so he picked up the blueberry muffin and unwrapped it before taking a bite. “Thanks, Janus.” He continued writing, taking occasional bites of the muffin, and Janus was also working hard, his banana nut muffin consumed rather quickly, the oolong tea drained from the mug. Finally, Logan spoke again. “Did Remus tell you where he was planning on taking Patton today?”

“The botanical gardens and then here for lunch, I think,” Janus responded. He seemed to be in deep thought, his thoughts miles away. “He’s going to tell Patton about his past, I think.”

“He should, before Roman beats him to it,” Logan said, loosening his tie. “He almost did last night when we were helping him pick out his outfit.” He sighed, and felt Janus’ fingers trail on his thigh, and met his eyes.

“They’re all falling in love, aren’t they? How weird is that? Love and romance. Such silly concepts,” Janus mused, a playful smile crossing his face. “But… they all deserve it. Happiness. We found our own kind of happiness, they get to find theirs now.” Logan nodded, stretching his arms a little bit.

“We’re not broken, right?” Logan’s voice was hesitant when he asked the question, and Janus frowned at him, taking his hand.

“Lo, we’ve been over this. Just because love and romance aren’t things we want to or can feel, doesn’t mean we’re broken,” Janus’ words were like a song that Logan needed to play over and over, and he wondered if that feeling would ever disappear. Sometimes when he curled up in Janus’ arms he almost felt whole, like he realized that there wasn’t a black hole where his heart should be. There were days where he shut himself off from the world, hiding in his room that was littered with papers and science equipment, because he wasn’t sure that he could ever deserve the happiness he felt when Janus was next to him. “Lo,” Janus’ voice was calling him back into himself, out of the fog of his mind. “Lo, did you sleep at all last night?”

“Uh… I slept for an hour or two,” he admitted, eyes glancing down. He was ashamed of his own insomnia sometimes, but being a double major was draining. Luckily, Janus always knew how to take care of him, make him realize that there was more to the world than just romantic love. 

“How much more schoolwork do you need to get done?” Janus asked rhetorically as he grabbed Logan’s planner, flipping to the page for the day. “Hmmm… not much, plus it’s only Saturday morning. Okay.” He closed the planner and then shut Logan’s laptop and then his own. “Come on, we’re going to your apartment to rest.”

“Jan–”

“Not mine, because Virgil and Roman are practicing and I want to give them space,” he explained, putting his laptop away. “No arguing this time, please. You need to take care of yourself.” Logan knew better than to argue, so he packed up his things and then the two walked to his apartment, fingers interlocked.

-

“Janus, this really isn’t necessary,” Logan grumbled as his partner removed his tie and unbuttoned his shirt, revealing the plain t-shirt underneath. “I need to get work done.” The shorter man ignored him, going to Logan’s dresser and pulling out some pajama bottoms. He threw them at his glasses-clad partner, raising an eyebrow. 

“You need to rest,” was the only thing he said before resting his hands on his hips, glancing around the cluttered bedroom. There were papers littering the carpet, books stacked everywhere despite the open spaces on the bookshelves, and empty coffee mugs all over the desk, and Janus noted some spilled coffee stains on the surface. He was about to shrug out of his coat when two arms wrapped around his waist and Logan’s chin rested on his shoulder.

“You could… help me rest, maybe,” he suggested, voice low. “It helps my mind slow down a little bit.” Janus knew this, and he spun around in Logan’s arms, pressing his hands to his partner’s face. “If you don’t want to–”

“You know I’d do anything to help you, Lolo.”

-

Afterwards, Janus slipped back into his shirt and a pair of Logan’s pajama bottoms. He got Logan’s help in rubbing lotion over the left side of his body, hoping to quell some of the pain brought on by his eczema. Then he brought over his laptop, putting on one of Logan’s favorite space documentaries, and the two snuggled, Logan dozing sporadically. Janus ran his fingers through the other’s hair, feeling calm and collected, a smile plastered on his face. When he heard Logan’s stomach grumble with hunger, they ordered Chinese takeout and ate it in bed, Janus smirking when a noodle stuck to the other’s chin. They watched a few more documentaries, the sun lowering itself in the sky, and eventually, Logan dozed off.

Janus pressed a swift kiss to Logan’s forehead, the other softly snoring, then got to work tidying up the room. He started by putting the books onto the shelves, but he didn’t follow a certain order, he just wanted to reduce Logan’s risk of falling over the stacks. Afterwards, he organized the scattered papers into different piles and then put them into the file cabinet, labeling them for the class or purpose they held. He wiped off the surfaces in the room with wipes he had stored in Logan’s desk, and then carried all of the mugs in his arms and out to the kitchenette.

When he exited Logan’s room, he saw Roman lounging on the couch, flipping through the script. When the actor noticed him, he raised an eyebrow, but smiled.

“How’s Virgil doing?” Janus asked, setting the mugs on the sink and turning on the hot water. Roman got up from the couch and sat on one of the stools at the counter, watching. 

“He…” Roman sighed, resting his hand under his chin. “He’s nervous about it all, of course. He doesn’t want to fall on stage, he doesn’t want to mess up.” His voice was hesitant, and Janus could tell that he was holding something back, but he didn’t want to pry; he focused on washing Logan’s mugs, smiling when he noticed the ones he had gifted him with nerd sayings on them. “Janus… did Virgil really… almost kill himself?”

The mug that Janus was holding slipped out of his hand, clattering into the sink. Thankfully, it stayed intact. He felt his throat constrict, the memories of that day rushing back through his mind, and he gripped the edge of the sink tightly, using one of his shaky hands to turn off the water. “He did,” Janus’ breath was heavy, too, and he couldn’t bear to turn around to look Roman in the eyes. “I… found him. It was… the worst day of my life.”

“How old were you at the time?” Roman’s voice sounded pained as the words left his mouth, and Janus chewed on his lower lip.

“We were 16,” he said, turning around and leaning against the sink, his eyes focused on his feet. “He’s… better now. Therapy and medication and all. But… I almost lost him.”

“He thinks he’s losing you,” Roman’s words came out before he could stop them, and Janus’ eyes snapped up to meet his, a frown on his face.

“What?” It was almost a hiss, Janus was feeling constricted again, and his defenses were rising. Roman held his hands out to try to calm him down.

“He just…” Roman sighed, lowering his hands, “Now that you’re in a partnership with Logan, he… thinks he’s not a priority in your life anymore. I did my best to tell him that couldn’t be true, but… you might need to talk to him.”

Janus ran a hand through his hair, sighing, but he nodded. “Thank you for telling me, Roman. I’ll… talk to him.” Roman nodded, then pursed his lips in thought.

“Our audition is a week from Friday… do you think that maybe… you and the others could sit in the back, where Virgil can’t see, and then be there when we’re done?” Roman’s voice was hesitant. He didn’t know Janus very well and had only spent time with him in small increments; it was Patton and Logan who spent more time with him, and Roman always found the sociology major to be… odd. But he meant a lot to Virgil. “He’s so nervous, I think he could do with some support afterwards.” Janus wondered why Roman was hesitant to be the only one providing the support to Virgil, but maybe it was a sign that Roman knew of his own limits.

“I… yeah, of course, Roman. I’ll make sure that we’re there.”

-

“Virgil?” Janus opened the door to their apartment later that night. Remus hadn’t returned yet, and Virgil was laying on the couch, holding a pillow close. Janus stepped out of his shoes and set his bag down, walking over. “I think we need to talk.”

“...do we?” Virgil made a move to sit up but Janus shook his head, pulling Virgil’s legs up and onto his lap as he sat down.

“Roman told me that you feel like less of a priority to me,” he said, eyes focusing on the taller man. Virgil’s mouth opened to respond but Janus shook his head.. “Virge, I need you to know that no matter how significant Lo, or anyone else, ever becomes to me, no one will ever be more important to me than you. Okay?” Virgil looked away, frowning, and Janus sighed, rubbing his feet.

“It’s just…” he took a deep breath, twisting his fingers in a manner that seemed very uncomfortable to Janus, but Virgil made no indication that it was. “You’ve got… someone to care for now, someone who cares for you in an equal manner, and… I’m just getting in the way.”

“V, you could never get in the way. Just because I’m with Logan doesn’t change the fact that if you needed me, I would drop everything to be there,” Janus’ voice was calm, and he rubbed Virgil’s feet and legs in a way that he hoped was comforting. “V. Look at me.” Virgil did, because he knew that Janus would keep at it until he did. Janus smiled warmly, his eyes meeting his best friend’s. “Please don’t forget how much I care for you. I know… things have changed, lately. I’m still figuring out the balance with Lo and everything, but… you’ll always be at the top of my priority pyramid.” Virgil smiled, recalling the drawing that Janus had made for him back when he was in the hospital for his attempt.

-flashback, six years ago-

“They don’t care, they never did,” Virgil was sitting up in the hospital bed, finally, bandage-covered arms crossed and a frown on his face. His parents had just left from their obligatory half-hour visit. “I’m not a priority to anyone.” Janus scoffed. He was sitting cross-legged at the foot of the bed, notebook in hand.

“You’re a priority to me, V,” he said, starting to scribble on the notebook. Virgil raised an eyebrow, peeking over to see a pyramid with words on several levels. “Okay, see? Bottom level is basic necessities like a roof and food. Then school and my family. Then me. And look, at the very top of the pyramid, it’s you. The most important thing.”

Virgil brought his hand up to his mouth to stifle the laugh that he felt rising up inside him, and he ignored the bandages on his wrist as he did so. Janus was surprised at the laughter; he hadn’t heard the noise coming from his best friend in weeks. “Jan, the most important and necessary thing goes at the base of the pyramid. Like in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs?” Janus frowned, glancing down at his pyramid. Virgil reached his hand out, taking the notebook from him. “But… I understand what you’re trying to say. Thank you.”

-end flashback-

“I still have that pyramid drawing you did,” Virgil said. He moved from his laying down position to sit next to Janus, and despite their height difference he leaned his head on the other man’s shoulder. “Maybe… maybe I won’t need to rely on only you, J.”

“What do you mean?” Janus found himself not liking the idea. Of course, ever since Remus had pranced his way into their little group, into their apartment, Janus knew that it could never be the same as it was when they moved in together right out of high school instead of living in the dorms. 

“I mean…” Virgil took a deep breath, a small smile taking over his facial features. “Maybe… maybe Roman will… care for me, too.” Janus turned his head a bit to give Virgil a confused look. “I think… Jan, I think he likes me.”

“He’d be a fool not to,” was the only response that Janus could muster up, but he felt strange about the whole thing. 

-

Janus had just finished eating his breakfast when there was a knock at the door. Virgil was still in bed, and Remus had left early to go on a brunch date with Patton. He opened the door, and saw Logan standing there, a sheepish smile on his face. 

“Hey, Lo, you okay?” He asked, pulling his partner inside and giving him a swift kiss to the cheek.

“I just… wanted to spend time with you,” Logan explained. Janus smiled, pulling him in for a warming hug. They moved to sit on the couch, Janus curled into Logan’s chest, an oceanography documentary playing in the background. “I was, um, thinking about the day we decided to… get together.”

“Oh?” Janus mused, playing with Logan’s fingers gently. “What about that day?”

“Just… the way you made me feel like I wasn’t broken. Like I deserve happiness.”

-flashback to early in the summer-

“I can’t help but feel… broken,” Logan sighed, laying on the floor of Janus’ room. “I know being aromantic is valid. You’ve helped me realize that, Janus. But… seeing people in romantic relationships are... they always seem so happy, and… will I ever feel happy like that?” Janus sighed from where he was propped up on his bed, pillows surrounding him. He clambered out of bed and then laid on the floor next to Logan, taking his hand and intertwining their fingers.

“You deserve the utmost of happiness. Regardless of what other people think, people like you and me do find happiness in our lives, even if romantic relationships aren’t appealing to us,” he said, voice soft and soothing. A few moments passed before he spoke again, “Logan… do you know what a queerplatonic relationship is?”

“Vaguely.” Logan asked, turning his head to look at the other, who was staring right up at the ceiling. “Why do you ask?”

“Well, I… thought maybe you’d…” Janus didn’t finish his sentence, instead closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Logan propped himself on his elbow, laying on his side to look at the other one more closely.

“Janus, are you asking me to be your partner?” Logan asked. They’d grown closer since meeting in class and getting to know each other, and when Janus found out that he also identified as aromantic, they began to spend even more time together.

“I… yeah, I think so,” Janus replied, looking at Logan again. “We’d need to establish boundaries. But… I don’t know, I think… it could work, and maybe we could… make each other happy.”

“What kind of boundaries?” Logan pressed, not yet stating if he wanted to enter the partnership. “Like… sex stuff?”

“I- I mean, only if you want that, we don’t have to do any of that, and if there’s something you want we can try it, and if it makes us uncomfortable we stop, it’s… all subjective to change,” Janus kept tripping over his words. He’d been thinking of asking Logan this for months, and had planned so many things out to say, but Logan never ceased to amaze him with the questions he didn’t anticipate.

“Well…” Logan started, taking a deep breath. “I would like to try… because you deserve to be happy, too, Janus.”

-end flashback-

“Anyways, I have something for you,” Logan reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out a rounded ring that looked like a galaxy. “You don’t have to, but, um, it’s kind of like…”

“A promise ring?” Janus took the ring into his own hands gingerly, a smile creeping onto his face. Logan nodded, then buried his face in Janus’ hair, mumbling. The smaller man said nothing but slipped the ring onto his finger.

“You make me feel happiness,” Logan said, face still buried in Janus’ hair. “I thought I couldn’t feel that, that I didn’t deserve it. But you and I deserve it, just as much as anyone else.”

---

teaser for part five: power outages can lead to some very bad things

When Roman got back to the apartment, all of the lights were out. Patton and Logan were nowhere to be seen, so he figured that they were both spending the night at the other apartment. He showered then got into bed, but laid on his back staring up at his ceiling until the sun started to bleed through the break in his curtains. He fucked up.

---

part five | part six | part seven | part eight | part nine | part ten

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taglist (if you want to be tagged when i update please let me know!)

@winterrose42

@are-you-even--real

@shaded14space

@lallyphant

@deceits-left-glove

@aricana8

@pixelated-pineapple

@starstruck-xavier

@thiel

@sophiexteresa

@cemmy

@toadink2005

[boxingcleverrr]

So per the votes on which post I should remake first: (also I’m using some Amazon links just cause it’s easy in most cases, shop elsewhere as you can!)

Skin Care!!!

I am, in all honesty, a basic bitch. When it comes to my skincare routine, I haven't ever gotten complicated with it, really. I am a product of some lucky genetics (women in my family don't really get SERIOUS acne as teens) and situation (there really wasn't much candy, soda, or other refined-sugar-loaded items in the house growing up, cause religious). However, I definitely have had my things: chickenpox at 15 years old has left some moon craters on my body. I am so pale I get a sunburn from said moon. And my feet...they're a whole other post, honestly.

But keeping things simple has served me well! So why not share the basics, and you can adjust as your needs need!

Also, as I get older (approaching 35), I definitely have had to add/change up some stuff. I’m not super concerned with “getting older”, per say. Sure, we’re all products of the society we live in, nobody escapes the obsession with youth, or the illusion that youth = health. But I have no illusions: when you get old, you will look older. You will get wrinkles. Getting old is a privilege many people I’ve loved didn’t get to enjoy.  

That said, both my grandmothers lived tough lives and didn’t take as good care of themselves, across the board, as they could have. In my mind and pictures they both looked about 90 when they died in their early-mid 70s. Meanwhile, my mother, who is only 18 years younger than her mother, looks about 55 and she’ll be 72 this year. The difference? Much healthier habits, modern medicine, modern emotional health (most of her lines are laugh lines), and yes, some goddamn sun screen and a daily moisturizer. When you feel good, when you have confidence in the face you show the world, the energy for more healthy habits often follow.  

So. SKIN.

Tools:

-  Cotton balls: are, without a doubt, the superior liquid product applicator. I know those cotton pads are alluring. And their textured side certainly has its place, especially re: tough makeup removal! Which we will get to. But for your everyday makeup remover, toner, and serums, nothing beats the absorbent little angel that is the cotton ball. It holds so much, allows you so much control, they just want to love you.

-  Cotton/Elastic Headbands:  These are not hard to find, nor are they expensive. You can get a bundle of 6-7 scunci fabric headbands at Walgreen's for 8 bucks. Your hair didn't ask for all the potions, soaps, and goops you're about to slap on your derm, so sweep it back with an elastic-filled band. Alternately, if you're someone who styles their hair BEFORE makeup, I'm told fancy foam-lined clips exist? IDK, sounds fake (jk jk)  

- Good ol' fashioned washcloths: You can get all kinds of fancy scrubbers these days, some looking like an electric toothbrush. Or maybe you’re that mythical fairy person from a skincare commercial who just splashes water on their face an somehow that cleans everything? Nothing really beats the terrycloth standby though, in my experience. Also, the average person is more apt to toss a used washcloth right into the laundry bin after use, while who knows how often you'll remember to clean that fancy scrubber an influencer told you to buy. Also, if you have extremely sensitive skin, like my mother does, actual 100% cotton flannel washcloths are wonderful! She has severe eczema and is also a sewer, so she made herself a hefty pile of them. It has made the world of difference for her.

- Q-Tips, Mini Paddles, Ends of Brushes, Etc: I know what you're thinking...."what?" So, this applies to any product you have that is in a jar/pot without an applicator - usually eye creams and moisturizers. If you use your fingers to swipe these things out of their containers, the bacteria on your fingers will gobble up the product in that container. Thus, you will run out much faster at best, and at worst, if the product is all organic? It WILL grow mold. I scoop my Dry Skin Cream out of the jar with the handle of a blush brush, put it in my hand, and THEN put it on. Those tiny pots are usually the most ridiculously expensive products in your kit, too. Don’t let your natural bacteria chow down on that shit! It’s $40 an ounce!!!

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Daily Facial Cleansers:

 Neutrogena Daily Acne Cleansers: Reminder that I am a basic bitch! These days the ol' drug store blemish standby has a Redness Reducer formula with Aloe, and also the lovely Grapefruit one! I totes have both. I use one or the other every few days. I don't often have bumps or zits these days, but I mean, heeeey this is probably a good reason why!  

Soap!  If you’re like me and have normal/combination skin, you don’t need a heavy-duty acne or oil-control wash every day. Find that good every day, moisture-rich, gentle soap your face likes. Dove is good, also see: the bodywash section of this post. The point is you’re washing your face every day, which everyone should be doing anyway, no matter what.

TRY STUFF! I am a faithful Ipsy subscriber for many years now. Very rarely do I receive a cleanser I don't like, and sometimes one I like so much I buy a full size to add to my rotation! Don't be afraid to try things, see how they work. If there are products that have made you have a bad reaction in the past, pay close attention to their ingredients. Same with if something works really well! Brands can basically charge whatever the hell they want for their potions, but if you know the ingredients that work best for your skin you'll almost always be able to find affordable, easy to buy options. That advice works across all of this post, all of these products. Unless the only thing that works for your skin is Baby Elephant tears. In which case, get used to acne, sorry, I make the rules.

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Exfoliants: 

Apricot Scrub: Hi hello have I mentioned in the last few paragraphs that I am a basic bitch? But really, let's be real: If a thing scrubs off dead skin good, it good. Sloughing off your dead dermis occasionally is good for you. After that, all that really matters is ingredients and if they work for you. Lots of exfoliants use microbeads, which we know are very bad for the environment. A straight sugar scrub can make you break out caaaause....duh, sugar. Say what you will, this ol' St. Ives standby has natural nut shell particles, a tried and true formula, and...it smells niiiiice. It wooooorks. I use it twice a week at most (usually in the winter), and I've only ever been pleased my whole adult life. I have no other specific one to pimp!  

But, these are a good criteria when TRYING STUFF! Maybe St. Ives doesn't work with your skin. It's still good to give that derm a good scrubbin' off of gunk and skin cells at least once a week, no more than twice a week. Look for formulas with environmentally friendly exfoliant agents and low to zero sugar.  

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Makeup Remover: (I KNOW I FINALLY STARTED USING IT!

Cetaphil: In true Basic Bitch fashion, I've rarely used actual makeup remover til now. I just used whatever soap or cleanser I was using to take off my warpaint as well. But then, I got into magnetic eyelashes, which....are amazing. I highly recommend, as I lose more lashes the older I get. Their literal only downside is that the magnetic eyeliner sets LIKE FUCKING TAR. Which is still! Only a downside! When you want to take it off! Within the last couple of months I went through best-of lists looking for the best makeup removers. My criteria was affordable + best for the skin, and good old Cetaphil was rated super high across the board. I went from scrubbing my eyelids raw to gently swiping that tar off immediately. On a few super humid nights, even? It's been the only moisturizer I've used. It's great.  

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Body:

Bodywash: Oh wait you're more than your face skin? What a concept! For years I was a devote' of Aveno bodywash. I still highly recommend! The fragrance-free formula ticks so many boxes. It scrubs you clean without leaving your skin feeling filmy or tight. It just...does it. It's Good.

Soap: HOWEVER! ....if you have a few MORE dollars to spend, I must promote my workplace. And not just because I work there, The Vermont Country Store Triple Milled Bar Soap really has replaced my bodywash. I use the Oatmeal & Almond bar myself. Can I compare the two? I can! They are, indeed, comparable. The bar, however, does have the upper hand in natural exfoliants in oat bits in the bar. I also like the soft almond scent a lot. Also, employee discount.

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Masks:

Dead Mud!: I use this Global Beauty Dead Sea Mask once a week. This is an example of an Ipsy sample I got that SUPER stuck, I REALLY like it. My skin feels AMAZING afterwards! I use it once a week, usually the day before my work week starts, to feel like I'm getting super clean and purged beforehand. A packet lasts a long time too, if you're using it once a week.  

Again, Try STUFF! Pealy masks are fun, but I personally rarely see much difference. Also, it is worth noting that most professionals/dermatologists will tell you that pore strips/masks that claim to cling to pore gunk and yank it out....don't really do much in the long run, if anything. Oftentimes, even, they leave your pores wider open to more gunk getting in! Clogged pores are far more related to diet, your everyday cleaning, and how oily your skin is naturally. You want gunk-less pores? Wash your face every day with a good cleanser and eat less sugar. (But I get it, some people like pore-strip videos like other people like pimple-popping videos)  

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Toner: 

Rosewater: Toner is a wonderful thing. It is meant to be used after all your scrubs, washes, masks, and removers to take off the last bits of whatever and tighten up your pores after they've been washed out. Pure Rosewater with Witch Hazel remains the very best natural toner, and it is honestly really cheap and easy to make yourself. I have made it myself for years! Now working so much for convenience I have bought the best, most simple I can find which is this Mario Badescu toner, and I really like it! But seriously. If you see a $4 bouquet of browning roses at the grocery store? THAT IS ALL YOU NEED. If you have a cooking pot with a cover and filtered/distilled water, you can make the best toner in the world. The Witch Hazel is a bonus.  

(I have been making toner myself for so long I have no idea where the original tutorial I used is, this one is pretty much everything I do without being a needless rambling blog post....uh...like this one is. Oops.)

.

Face Moisturizers:

Ponds Dry Skin Cream: Oprah told me to use this when I was 19. I can’t remember exactly the ingredient the episode told everyone to look for! But I do know it fit the most important criteria: It did not immediately disappear into my skin, but also did not leave my skin greasy 15 minutes later. I stand by it loyally! Truly, I feel like being urged to use a moisturizer early is a big part of why my skin is so good now. In the winter especially, living with woodstove heat, I use it morning and night. As I do get older, I find I need less of it/something less creamy in the summer! Which leads toooooo...

Olive Oil Squalane:  Spanish Olive Oil is the long-time secret of Sophia Loren and many other classic movie stars of olde. Squalane is a pure olive oil often mixed with other herbs like Rosemary. In the winter I use it every couple of days right before bed. In the summer, I use it a little more often as my near-daily moisturizer. I press it into my face with open palms and it's SO NICE.  

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Body Moisturizers:  

Aveno: For my overall BOD, I generally stick to Aveno Daily Moisturizing lotion. Usually I use the fragrance free, but on THOSE DAYS, I also have the Soothing Lavender option.

Vaseline Cocoa Radiant Lotion: Also, so good!

Basically, when it comes to your whole rest of you, obviously you probably want the best for your buck. You have a lot of body that wants to be lotion'd after every shower! If you're like me, that means you want a biiiig bottle for not a ton of dollars. These two brands are usually affordable at your drug store (you really can't go wrong with Vaseline brand, period). A good rule of thumb is the same as for your face: You DO NOT want to stick with a lotion that seeps immediately into your skin leaving a tight feeling, OR something that is still greasy 10 - 15 minutes later. You want to feel smooth, a little textured but not GREASY, just silky. That's a good body lotion for you.  

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Eye Cream: (I AM AN OLD!)

Blah blah blah reminder that age is gonna happen to everyone. That said.

I don't want to look sad and tired when you look at me. That doesn't inspire confidence in the people I interact with. Thus, my dark circles finally met The Eye Cream at age 30.  

Belief Eye Bomb: This one is my top tier! I love it. I do see a difference immediately and while I WANT my smile lines, I hate my frown lines. It is whipping them into shape! Alas, it is not always in my budget, so.

Emu Oil: Not that this option is for everyone, especially if you’re against the use of animal products. I get it (even if Emus are EVIL DINOSAUR BIRDS). You can’t deny its results on our dermis, though, and it’s an ingredient in a lot of good eye/night creams across many budgets! I use this option via, you guessed it, work.

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Sunscreen: (WHICH I TAKE SO SERIOUSLY AS A MOON BEING)  

Avon Anew: This SPF 50 lotion is a powerhouse, and I do rely on it for my face, upper back and shoulders if I am going out into the sun intentionally.  

NYX Bare With Me: A primer made with Cannabis Sativa Seed, it has an SPF of 30 and is truly a really good makeup primer!  

WHATEVER IS AT THE STORE, FUCK: For your whole body, damn, get a big bottle of something, preferably SPF 30 or higher. Anything marked “Sport” will likely stave off a lot of sweaty greasiness. Don't get fucking cancer.  

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Overall Tips:

WASH YOUR PILLOWCASES!: I can't stress this one enough, because so many people don’t realize! Your face touches this surface for as many hours of your life you spend asleep. I understand that not everyone washes/changes their sheets every week! But ANY time you do laundry, wash your pillowcases. I know I haven't washed mine recently enough when I wake up to bumps all along my jaw...usually a week in.

WASH YOUR MAKEUP TOOLS!: Same thought! Not only are our sponges, blenders, and brushes FILLING with product every time they’re used, but they’re just plain are all over your face all the time. Now, how often you wash them can depend on how often you wear makeup! Almost every day? Wash your tools at least every other week. A couple days a week? Wash them once a month. Not since your aunt's wedding last fall? Eh, still, your skin cells have been sitting on those sponges since then, might as well wash them now before someone invites you to a last-minute end of the world Zoom party.  

NEVER sleep in your makeup:  That's all it is. Don't do it. DON'T. DO. IT. The fact that you’re cementing your face paint into your pillows and your pores aside, you also feel like that much more garbage in the morning. Promise.  

Avoid Sugar: Again, for me, it's that straightforward. I haven't had soda in my diet regularly...really Ever? See: growing up in a rural super religious home. We ate veggies off the farm. But I also haven’t had it with my fast food or on a pizza night since I was around 17. The only exceptions are ginger ale when I am sick, and the occasional Rum & Coke. Regarding the latter, I KNOW I will have pimples the next day! It is like clockwork. I take my favorite easy mix drink into myself with this unholy knowledge. I know so many of us grew up drinking soda/pop regularly, every day even. Treat me as the test subject I am to learn from: I don't drink soda or eat candy or sweets in my regular life at all. The minute I do (yes, even diet soda), I break out. Less so with home-baked goods like cake or cookies! But soda or candy? forget about it, bumps, immediately. Processed sugary treats are a sometimes food, my skin benefits, the end.

Drink Lots of Water: The older I get, the truer it is. I FEEL it when I'm not drinking enough water, man. Water intake can take many forms, too! Herbal tea, fresh fruit juices, and sparkling waters. Throw in fresh lemon/lime! Anything to make it more interesting while adding as little sugar or sodium as possible. I’ve been a green tea drinker since I was a teenager, I am sure this has been a big help.

Take Vitamins: THEY ARE GOOD FOR YOU! However, many people think they can hedge their bets by taking a shitton, which...is not true.

The Big Bang Theory was a garbage show it’s true. However, I cannot help that a line from the first (?) episode has stuck with me forever. As Penny is loading up on various bottles of vitamins, Sheldon comments, “While there is some benefit to taking a daily multi-vitamin, the human body can only absorb so much in a day. Anything more and you’re basically just buying expensive pee.”

All to say, all you REALLY need is a well-rounded multi-vitamin. I faithfully take my Women’s One A Day. Don’t go crazy and think that’ll give you an edge. Unless your doctor specifically says otherwise, you and I can only absorb the same amount of biotin, vitamin e, and vitamin d in a day.  

The Sun Is Evil: Speaking of Vitamin D! Yes, you need it to live. You can also very easily get it in pill form! While I understand that there are those among us who mentally and socially blossom best in the light of our Evil Orb Lord, its UV rays spare no one. Hugh Jackman in all his handsome moneyed Hollywood wholesomeness has faced skin cancer half a dozen times as an Aussie directly in its sights.  

 I myself suffer from a kind of backwards seasonal depression? Bright sun/overhead light depresses me. So this is an easy rule to live by for me, I admit! SPF 80 and big floppy hats are my norm come the summer, and year-round sunscreen is my preferred primer. If you are NOT like me, and need that summer light and heat for your mental wellbeing, PLEASE slather on layers of sunscreen regularly. I again super stick to anything labeled 'sport' to avoid greasiness.

 Skin Cancer is the most prevalent type of cancer and it spares no one. Perodt.

Get SLEEP: I know, easier said than fuckin done these days, especially. Whether you’re able to work from home or not, all our Covid anxiety is keeping us up. We're stressed out for ourselves and/or loved ones who’ve been protesting and if they’re gonna be secreted away in unmarked vans. For the world being on fucking fire in general! No one should be judging you for those bags under your eyes ever, but especially right now. Be gentle on yourself, but also take the time to find what you need to secure those 8 solid hours at some point. A SIDE perk is that it’s good for your skin. On the main, you’ll be rested to kick the rest of this year in the ass.  

...That’s all? Wow this was 7 pages long.

Basically, above all, giving yourself a day at the spa in your own home is also soothing, relaxing, and hell, don’t we all need that right now?