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blakeduncan · 10 months

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Blood Ties

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, and not meant to be an unproblematic representation of a relationship. Head the tags/warnings

The reason you’re so good at your job? You don’t ask questions. A year in to working as a night-time motorcycle courier, and you’re still no closer to knowing who for and what it is you deliver. Things are safer that way. You’re safer. One night, everything changes. Cassius Acisculus wants you. And he never takes no for an answer.

AO3: Chapter 1/?

Tags OC x Reader, Reader Insert, MM, Dark Romance, Supernatural elements Content Warnings Kidnapping, Dubious Consent, Badly Negotiated BDSM elements

Know why you’re good at your job? It’s because you don’t ask questions.

Ok fine, there’s other reasons too. Like that when you’re on your motorbike, you ride like the wind. Like that you’re not afraid to get your hands dirty. Like that there’s no weather in the world — not rain or snow or sun or hail — that can stop you.

Not even the storm that’s brewing tonight.

It starts as a light drizzle in the early hours of darkness. It’s early winter, early enough that a few umber coloured leaves cling desperately to their trees. But it’s winter enough that the sun sets early, that it’s easy for you in your late sleeping hours to never see the light. It’s not a heavy rain, not yet, but it’s the kind of weather that’s only pleasant when you’re not in it. For a moment, you think about how nice it would be to be back inside, huddled under your blankets with a bowl of hot soup in hand.

But you have work to do.

Your bike is a beat up old wreck that’s had a dozen owners before you. But it’s your Baby. You love that old thing more than you love anything else in your life. Sometimes you even wonder if you might love Baby more than you love anybody else. But that’s a dangerous thought. Letting it stick in your head brings up too many memories, forces you to think about all the people you keep at arm’s length and all the friendships you’ve let die. You don’t have time for that. So you push it away, force it down. You put on your helmet — the closed face turning you into just another anonymous commuter — and ride.

It’s an hour or so after the worst of the rush hour traffic, but you still have to ease your way through the road on the way to The Warehouse. Your handlebars narrowly avoid outstretched car mirrors, your toes brush against tire edges. And around you, the rain gets heavier.

The Warehouse isn’t a single warehouse, really. The place you’re meant to go to receive jobs changes regularly, the new updates slid under your apartment door in a crisp envelope. Inside are map coordinates — to go with the broken spined map book that lives permanently on the floor next to your bed — and instructions to burn the entire envelope when you’re done. This time, The Warehouse is only around a fifteen minute ride from your studio. A small unit on an industrial estate, the place looks damn near abandoned when you park outside the wire gates. Old business signs are sun bleached, ancient torn-apart posters that only half-cling to their walls flap in the wind. It reeks, wet cardboard and gathering dust, the rich earth scent that can only come from rot.

The gate is unlocked, and it squeals on its hinges when you push it open. You’re expecting the door to the unit to be unlocked too, but when you try to pull it open you find it won’t budge.

Sighing, you raise your clenched fist and knock. First once. Then twice.

No answer.

You swear under your breath.

It’s only as you turn on the ball of your foot to leave that the door swings open, a familiar face peering at you from the darkness. He gestures for you to come inside, movements sharp and forceful. You obey, stepping inside the building, and the door shuts behind you.

“Were you followed? Did you leave your phone behind? Do you think anyone saw you?”

The questions come so quick the man barely has enough time to breathe between words. You raise both still-gloved hands, try to bite back the bitter laugh threatening to force its way between your lips.

“Nice to see you’re still alive too, Deacon. Thought one of us would have at least caught a stray bullet by now.”

Those wide, panicked eyes narrow, until they’re glaring at you, white-hot.

“Oh,” Deacon says, not bothering to try and hide the disdain in his voice. “It’s you. They wanted you for the job.”

You shrug. There’s plenty you could say to that. Maybe plenty you want to say. But it’d be unwise, and you’ve already pushed things with Deacon the last few times you’ve taken a job from him. He’s a tall wall of muscle, and in the cramped warehouse he looms over you even larger than normal. His fingers twitch, and you know they’re thinking about tightening around the grip of a pistol.

The two of you stand there for a moment, in silence. If you didn’t know any better, you’d sa you were sizing each other up.

If you are, Deacon breaks first. He turns away from you to a work bench at the back of the room, gesturing at it with the hand that isn’t currently twitching. You follow him and see two things. A map-book, just like yours if not for being in better shape, and a box.

A box that looks for all the world like a perfectly normal cardboard box.

It’s plain brown, taped down on all sides with thick brown tape. There isn’t even a ‘this way up’ printed on one side. It’s completely unremarkable. And you have no desire to know why it’s so unremarkable.

“You’re taking this to 135 on Kingswood. Map reference is 220-7. When you get there, ring the doorbell, and wait for somebody to come and take the parcel from your hands. Payment’ll be under your door in three days. Understood?”

You nod, and step towards the table. Kingswood Avenue is the other side of town, a street of the few grand Victorian houses that haven’t been broken up into tiny apartments yet. It’s the kind of place that makes you feel poor for taking a breath in. You’ll go there, for sure. You don’t really have a choice in the matter.

But you don’t like this. This feels strange.

When you pick up the cardboard box, it weighs almost nothing.

You probably shouldn’t pry. Every one of your instincts is telling you not to, and they’ve done a pretty good job at keeping you alive so far. But right before you open the warehouse door to leave, you can’t help yourself. The walls are thin, and you can hear the heavy rain outside, can feel the dampness in the air.

“Deacon,” you begin, trying to think of the gentlest way to word this. “What you said… I… should I be worried about being followed?”

Deacon looks at you, catches your eye. And for a moment, something in his gaze almost softens. Almost looks sorry.

A single heavy heart beat later, and the softness is gone.

“Just go,” he says. “Do your job.”

And — because you’re good at keeping your head down and yourself alive — you do as he asks.

The rain doesn’t so much fall as pour down from the heavens as you drive over to Kingswood. You’re not allowed to a phone with you, so you follow the route entirely from memory, taking each turn that you ran your finger over on paper. When you set off from your apartment, the streets still seemed full, frantic commuters hurrying home in their suits, glum-faced as they reminded themselves it was only a few days until the weekend. But now the streets are quieter. Not entirely deserted, but quiet. Logically you know it’s because everyone is sheltering inside from the rain, but something in your gut tells you it feels wrong.

House 135 on Kingswood is a mansion from a century and a half ago, a marble pillared entrance set a few meters back from the iron railing fence that surrounds it. The iron gate squeals on its hinges as you push them open, and as you walk up to the tall, looming front door you can’t help but think about two things. Firstly, how small you feel in comparison to it, how inconsequential and fragile and mortal.

And second, how loud your footsteps feel on the paved path up towards the door arch.

The air feels cold and still and it smells rich and earthy as graveyard dirt. You press the bell — bronze turning green with age — , first once, then twice. And then you wait. The parcel is tucked under one arm and your helmet is under the other, and the portico seems so large and dark it’s like it’s swallowing you whole.

The doors don’t swing open so much as glide, and that’s when he steps out. The man who is going to change your life forever.

You don’t know what he is, not then. What you see is a handsome older man, bronze tan skin and dark curls that are just turning silver at the temples. He’s smartly dressed, in a dark suit that you’re sure costs more than your rent every month. But he doesn’t wear it like some men wearing expensive clothes — moving starched and stiff, like they’re afraid to tear the fabric. Instead, he moves as fluidly as the door into his vestibule did, like he’s as used to the weight and cut of the fine cloth as you are to your motorcycle jacket.

You shiver, a chill running down your body from a source you can’t identify.

He’s wearing cologne, and you can smell it even stronger as he takes a step forward, flashing a smile with too-white teeth. He smells of dark patchouli and aged wine, of smoke and fireplace embers, incense and aged leather. But his eyes — his eyes are what you can’t look away from, impossibly dark and unreadable.

He reaches out a hand, palm upturned, and the watch on his wrist doesn’t tick. Instead — just like him, just like the door — it glides.

“Ah,” he begins, and his voice is deep and warm and distant as a hearth fire. “The delivery I’ve been expecting.”

You blink for a second, trying to bring yourself back to reality. And then you remember it — why you’re here, what your job is. Heat rising to your cheeks, you hold the cardboard box out in front of yourself, offering it to him.

If you look, you can see that your hands are shaking.

The older man takes it from you, tucks it under one arm. He’s not wearing a tie with his suit, the shirt is unbuttoned deep enough that you can see just a little of the dark hair that covers his chest. That smile — cold and hypnotising all at once — widens.

When he speaks, it’s a purr. “Thank you, dear boy.”

He has an accent you can’t quite place. The consonants have an edge as clear and sharp as the blade of the knife you keep in your jacket pocket. There’s something about this man — something you can’t quite place — that makes you think about that knife, wonder how quickly and easily you could reach for it.

You give him a non-committal grunt and a shrug. The smile doesn’t narrow, but the edges of the man’s mouth twitch slightly.

“Not a conversationalist, are we?”

He says it like a joke, but something in his words is weighty. You’re suddenly very aware of your heart, of how it’s sped up, not quite pounding in your chest but readying itself. He takes a step forward, soles of his leather shoes clicking against the floor stones of the portico.

“Not paid for chitchat,” you manage, eventually, your mouth dry. He’s taller than you, not by much but by enough that you feel like a cornered animal as he takes a second step towards you.

“Oh, but life would be dull if we only did what we were paid for, don’t you think? Come, at least tell me your name.”

You don’t want to tell him your name. You really don’t. But your name comes out between your lips, unbidden. Your lungs feel empty after you’ve said it, like all the air in them has been forced out as you spoke.

There’s another flash of white teeth in the man’s smile. “Call me Cassius. And you know, dear boy, now we’re introduced properly, I can’t stand the idea of sending you home in this weather. You would chill to the bone.”

The thing is, you want to go home. You want to go home more badly than you want anything else in the world. You want to shelter there, wait until an envelope of money slides its way under your door and your life goes back to normal. But you can’t open your mouth to speak, can’t turn and run back to your bike. You can’t move at all.

Your body isn’t yours to control.

“Come,” he says, voice low and dangerous. “Shelter inside in the dry.”

Something makes you step forward, following him inside. And those doors slide closed behind you, as gracefully as they had opened.

#vampire oc #vampire x reader #male x reader #reader insert #mlm #mlm romance #dark romance #dark x reader #fic: blood ties

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hulijingemperor2 · 1 year

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Yao: *fixing his clothes* are you ready team D?

Su she: *hands A-Yao his fan* yea Huangdi.

Xue yang: why can't Huaisang pay his own dowry to grapey and emperor peacock.

Yao: for courtesy reasons, Chengmei. And it's a historical moment for my empire and Zixuan's.

Su she: love you, Huangdi.

Mo xuanyu: just admit that Huaisang is broke. We all know, Yao gege.

Yao: yes, sadly he is. Don't tell him I say so though.

Su she: other than broke hauisang! You look very gorgeous, Huangdi.

Mo xuanyu: always do!

Yao: thanks sweethearts.

Xue yang: Jiggy, I think A-Qing is turning into a simp.

Yao: huh. *fixes hat and hair* maybe he got that from you.

Mo xuanyu: *snickers*

Xue yang: noo Jiggy! She's a bigger simp than me.

Su she: Song'er and A-qing have some cute chemistry going on.

Yao: I totally agree.

They're the best of friends. And Song'er takes good care of her.

Xue yang: oh for real?? Did she really get a rich guy. Lol. A-qing has taste.

Yao: Chengmei, they're just friends.

Xue yang: for now, Jiggy.

Soon she got to learn how to be Wang fei.

Mo xuanyu: and how to be a Dianxia's wife.

Yao: don't rush.

Everything is up to Song'er. And both are friends.

Mo xuanyu: but we're your besties and your simps!

Yao: haha. If these two start dating, would you give A-qing shovel talk?

Xue yang: yes. And harder! She can't embarrass me by discarding a fine, well mannered, handsome, rich prince of hulijings.

Mo xuanyu: of course not. She's fab.

Su she: nah, we only give Lan lips shovel talk.

Yao: would you give Song'er shovel talk?

Xue yang: no, he's a polite guy. He's mini boss Dianxia! And I don't want to be killed by you or punished by Song'er's bodyguards.

Su she: Dianxia is perfect.

Mo xuanyu: Yao gege raised him well.

Yao: yes indeed. And no one can touch him.

Mo xuanyu: Dianxia is untouchable untouchable!!

Xue yang: yup.

On the other side,

Rusong: *going to meet up with Ayao*

A-Qing: rich gege!! Yo! Rich gege! Where are you going all dressed up?!

Rusong: I'm going to uncle Zish's place. Him and A-Die are going to renew their alliance.

A-Qing: ohh. How are they going to do that??

Rusong: they're going to marry uncle Sang to uncle Jiang, and also exchange dowries.

A-Qing: how does that work, rich gege. I don't understand.

Rusong: uhh...it's like how you gave me a sachet and I gave you some hairpins. It made our friendship and alliance stronger right?

A-Qing: yea!

Are you trying your politics on me?? Omg!

Rusong: no, Xiao Qing.

Anyways, how's the staff?

A-Qing: they're good for now. And I'm I'm friends with Xiao wei so.

But I don't really need them.

Rusong: why?

A-Qing: cuz I'm not rich like you.

Rusong: ohhh, you don't need to be rich to live comfortably.

A-Qing: I see. Anyways I'm not really accustomed to it. But thanks again.

Rusong: do you want to come with us, A-qing? It might be boring here, you alone.

A-Qing: of course!!! I would love to go anywhere with you! *hugs arm*

Rusong: *heart racing* delightful!

A-Qing: yay! Rich gege!

Rusong: A-Die.

Yao: Song'er. You look lovely. And especially with your hand fan.

A-Qing: heyyy Jiggy!!!

Yao: hi A-Qing.

Xue yang: look who's clinging on to Rusong. Little simp.

A-Qing: I'm not afraid to bite you!

Rusong: can A-Qing come along, A-Die? I think she might be bored here alone.

Yao: sure she can come, Song'er. *smile*

Rusong: great.

A-Qing: Emps. You don't need to arrange an extra caravan for me. I'm riding with Rusong!

(Emps* short for emperor)

Yao: sounds like a plan.

Mo xuanyu: awwww.

A-Qing: thank you, Emps!

Yao: *smile* let's go.

A-Qing: *hugging Rusong's arm* you're the coolest Emps, Jiggy.

~~~

Peacock empire 📍.

A few people were in attendance.

Entering, the Hulijing emperor, Hulijing prince, team Dimple and Miss Qing of Yi City.

Xue yang: why aren't I Yang of Yi city. She got fancy titles. Hmpf!

Su she: delinquent of Kuizhou.

Xue yang: I like that one, hehe.

Zixuan: Foxy!

Yao: Xuanxuan!!

Zixuan: heehee I mean greetings *bow* Hulijing Huangshang.

Yao: *bow* greetings to you Peacock Huangshang.

Jiang cheng and Hauisang: *in the corner*

Jiang cheng: look at them two. Acting cute and formal.

Huaisang: their cuteness are a distraction.

Jiang cheng: definitely.

Huaisang: *goes to A-Yao's side*

Yao: ah you look stunning, Huaisang. *hugs shortly*

Mo xuanyu: finally do.

Su she: he doesn't look like Huangdi.

Yao: well, Xuan Huangdi. I'm going to let my harem member, Nie huaisang of Qinghe Nie marry your harem member. Also, we all know his horny tendencies.

Huaisang: hey!

Zixuan: lovely. But you're still working for me, Hassang.

Or else I'll sell you to team dimple.

Huaisang: *imagining himself as a team D attendant*

Xue yang: Huaisang, can you remove the fierce corpse's tongue for me. My hands are full.

Mo xuanyu: do you always look like you were hit with something? Or is that just your face.

Ugh.

Su she: go to jail. You were rude to my Huangdi.

Huaisang: NOOOO!!!

Zixuan: what is wrong with you?

Yao: we're in front of an audience, Huaisang. Have some conduct.

Zixuan: ehem. I'll let my harem member. Well our harem member. Jiang cheng of Yunmeng Jiang to marry Huaisang.

Yao: Xuan Huangdi.

Zixuan: yes Yao Huangdi.

Yao: for the dowry, I'm ready to offer a fox spirit defence force, who will protect you, a variety of rare weapons, 3 million golden taels, some Jade ceramics the put around your mansion and a field of roses. And for Jiang cheng, you don't have to pay tax in Yunping anymore. As well as I'll gift you a lotus field.

For both of you, I'll give you 25 caravans each.

Zixuan: brilliant. I do accept.

Thank you Huangdi.

I'll give you 4 million golden taels. One of my golden Peacock feather, a spring mansion in Dongying, because I know that you love dongying a lot. And lastly I'll give you a whole peach blossom forest! Peacock spirits are already guarding you and Jingjing Huyao empire.

And as for Huaisang. I'll gift him an expensive fan collection and a few art supplies. All imported. Other than that I'll gift him a broom.

Yao: do accept, Huangdi. Such beautiful gifts.

Jiang cheng: did those Huangdis just made themselves richer.

Huaisang: yup.

Yao: darling it's called politics.

Yao: anyways. Huangdi is so kind.

Zixuan: no Yao Huangdi is too kind.

Yao: oh you!

Zixuan: you always have the sweetest gifts.

Yao: you have a lot of taste, Huangdi.

Zixuan: thank you, Huangdi.

Yao: aren't you two going to get ready. We have a ceremony to start!

Huaisang: one question. Why did you buy me a broom?

Zixuan: what do you use a broom for, Huaisang. Obviously to sweep my floors.

Huaisang: *scoffs*

Yao and Zixuan: uncultured.

Yao: at least Jiang cheng is normal.

Zixuan: yea he's so fine. And powerful.

Yao: yup. And do you see how he takes care of A-ling?

Zixuan: aww yes! Huaisang could never take care of a child.

Xue yang: the way to the emperors heart is to take care of their children and be hot and powerful.

Su she: yup.

Mo xuanyu: that's why we helped take care of Song'er. And Yao gege needed the help anyways.

Yao: Zish Huangdi. Jiang cheng is favored by both of us. Why don't we make him a personal general. Like he can defend us whenever someone wants to attack our empire.

Zixuan: good idea, Foxy. It will be done.

He'll be under the order of the peacock and fox.

Jiang cheng: ugh, Yao Huangdi, Zixuan Huangdi. I'll do my best. But I'm sort of honoured.

You know I always have to compete with that shameless Wei wuxian.

Thank you I guess.

Yao and Zixuan: *smiles, then stretched out their hand*

Jiang cheng: oh come on! Fine.

*kisses their hands* I'm honoured, you two.

Xue yang: it's ok to call them divas.

Mo xuanyu: gosh I see it now. They are divas. But I like it. And I'm a diva too so.

Yao: the staff will get them ready for the wedding. But first, can you two confess your love for each other?

Zixuan: if you cancel, we're still keeping the gifts.

Huaisang: yes! I love Jiang cheng! And had a crush on him since when we were in the cloud recesses.

Jiang cheng: I....I...kind of.

Ehem. How to put this....I fancied him too. His personality is alright. And we did get drunk together one time.

Huaisang: awwww Jiang cheng. You remembered. *cries*

Rusong: uncle Zish.

Zixuan: aw hi Song'er.

Rusong: congrats on the historic event.

Um...this is my friend A-Qing.

Zixuan: *raises brow~ scanning to see if she's wife material for Song'er*

A-Qing: you're a very scary peacock.

Why the hell are you staring at me like that. As you know peacock, I'm very rich.

Zixuan: how am I scary? Anyways, it's a pleasure to meet you.

A-Qing: do you all talk like that! It makes me nauseous! Peacock, do you curse? Can I teach you how to curse?

Xue yang: A-Qing! Don't scare the peacock!

A-Qing: what's your favorite curse word.

Yao: *eye twitch*

Zixuan: *confused*

No darling, I don't use profanities.

A-Qing: huh, what a fancy word.

Do you just turn into a peacock and shit on people's properties. Wait no, those are pigeons. My bad.

Zixuan: *whispers* Yaoyao.....Help me...

Yao: A-qing, this is my brother, Zixuan. The peacock spirit emperor. Those kinds of things aren't his interests.

A-Qing: oh. Sorry sorry peacock Huangdi.

Zixuan: it's fine darling. And you're Song'er's friend.

A-Qing: xue yang is my guardian.

Zixuan: ah, explains a lot. You're playful just like him.

A-Qing: yea! so you and Jiggy are close.

That's cute.

Zixuan: yes.

Yao: we are.

A-Qing: ohhh. I see. You both are fabulous divas.

The wedding!!

Jiang cheng and Hauisang: *wearing red*

Officiator: perform the three bows.

Yao: *opens fan* such a beautiful couple.

Zixuan: indeed.

A-Qing: you two emperors are crazy and are divas. But I like it.

Su she: Huangdi looked ethereal in his wedding robes.

Xue yang: for real.

Mo xuanyu: does huaisang really have to look like a tomato.

Officiator: you two are now married. Congrats!!

Everyone: *clapping for them*

Yanli: congrats, A-cheng.

Jiang cheng: thanks jiejie.

Huaisang: yippeee!!! We're married!!!

Mingjue: Yao Huangdi!! I hope this doesn't end up in a disaster. You better monitor them to see if nothing happens.

Yao: everything will be fine, Dage.

Zixuan: *blocks A-Yao* Foxy....I mean Huangdi doesn't have to listen you.

Mingjue: why?!

Zixuan: because he doesn't work for you.

*opens fan*

Mingjue: is this some kind of strategy to be richer?

Zixuan: no! It's to strengthen bonds.

Yao: it's an emperor thing.

Zixuan: look, Hassang and Jiang cheng are happy!

Huaisang: *snuggling Jiang cheng*

Jiang cheng: *feeding him jiaozi*

Mo xuanyu: I hope you leave Yao gege alone after this.

Jiang cheng: leave him alone. Wuxian lookalike.

Xue yang: you guys are rude!

Rusong: congrats uncle Sang and uncle Jiang.

Huaisang: thanks Song'er.

Jiang cheng: thank you Dianxia.

Huaisang: who's the chick?

Rusong: oh this is my friend, A-Qing.

A-Qing: xue yang said I popped out of him.

Huaisang: ew.

Xue yang: have some respect!! It was historic!

#the huli jing emperor #foxyao #dimpledlianfang #jin guangyao #jin zixuan #meng yao #part 2 #su she #the untamed #hulijing emperor 2 #nie huaisang #jiang cheng #emperor #fox spirits

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an-emotional-blender · 1 year

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Michael Clifford - Not Like I'm in Love with You

Inspired by Not Like I'm in Love with You - Lauren Weintraub. Def go and give it a listen.

Blurb // Masterlist

1.2k words

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So, how're you feeling about your first live performance?" He sits down on the couch next to me as he speaks. "Scared, excited, nervous, like you wanna puke?"

"Is all of the above an option?"

"All of the above is perfectly acceptable. You've never even sung in front of more than 10 people, and now there is 10,000 people out there, all waiting to see you perform. You are going to do amazing." I look at his face and can tell he's being sincere. Of course he is. He's the most sincere person I've ever met.

Michael Gordon Clifford. Most know him as the guitarist from 5 Seconds of Summer, but me, I know him as the person who has been by my side through everything. He was the one who convinced me to release my first single, which lead to my first album, then the second, and now I'm about to do the first live performance of my career. He makes it so easy to love him.

Except, I shouldn't.

He's my best friend and he's with Crystal. I shouldn't have those kind of feelings for him.

"Thanks Mikey. I'm just hoping they all like my newest song. Imagine your new song just flopping completely in front of thousands of people." Michael laughs. God I love that sound. "Like, that is what I'm most scared for."

"I haven't heard it yet, or even know what it's about," There's a reason for that. "but I know for a fact it's going to be amazing. I mean you wrote it, so it's already amazing." Suck up.

Maybe I should tell him. I mean he's going to figure it out while I'm singing anyway. It might soften the blow a little bit if I tell him before he hears it.

"Hey. You with me? You zoned out really hard there." He's now turned to face me, concern etched on to his features. Shit.

"Mike, I need to tell you something but I need you to know that I'm not saying it to mess anything up and I don’t want it to change our friendship. This new song is -"

"Hey! There's two minutes till you're on stage. Get out there!" I'm interrupted by my manager and the opportunity to tell Michael about my feelings is gone.

"You can tell me after, yeah? I'll be in the front row. Good luck. You're gonna be incredible." Mikey smiles at me and walks out. Well, it's now or never.

______________________________________________________________

"Okay, I know we are having so much fun right now and I have absolutely loved performing for you guys but unfortunately I can only do one more song before they kick me out. This is my newest song, that is going to be released at midnight tonight, but you all get to hear it first. This is one of my favourite songs I've written but it's also the one I'm the most scared to sing, because the person I wrote this song about is in the front row," I look down and see Michael standing there smiling at me…with his arm wrapped around Crystal's waist. Shit. "with his girlfriend. So we'll see how this goes. This is called, Not Like I'm in Love with You." The music starts and I make eye contact with Michael again. The smile is gone and he's looking at me with a frown and furrowed brows.

He's caught on and I can't help but tear up a little bit, knowing that this is going to change our friendship, no matter how much I don't want it to.

"We're just friends, right?

Like we've been, right?

So you can tell me 'bout the girl that you kissed last night

Keep going on about staying at her house

It's not like I feel like I could throw up right now

You're my ride or die

So I'm not jealous, right?

'Cause the way I feel about you is just black and white

And I ain't been staying up

Overthinking us

Tripping all over these feelings, nah that'd be dumb

It's fine, yeah it's cool

Not like I wanna make a move

It's fine, yeah it's cool

It's not like I'm in love with you

Shit"

Well this is it.

"No, I'm not feeling unwell

No, it's not scary as hell that I

Want you more than anyone else

Want your body all to myself

It's not like I'm losing my head

Thinking 'bout you in my bed

Keep doing that thing you do

It's not like I'm in love with you

It started slow but then like dominoes

I started free falling for you, no control

Couldn't hide the truth from my friends too

It's not like everybody knows but you

It's fine, yeah it's cool

I totally know what to do

It's fine, yeah it's cool

It's not like I'm in love with you

No, I'm not feeling unwell

No, it's not scary as hell that I

Want you more than anyone else

Want your body all to myself

It's not like I'm losing my head

Thinking 'bout you in my bed

Keep doing those that thing you do

It's not like I'm in love with you

It's not like

It's not like I'm in love with you

It's not like

It's not like I'm in love with you

No, I'm not feeling unwell

No, it's not scary as hell that I

Want you more than anyone else

Want your body all to myself

It's not like I'm losing my head

Thinking 'bout you in my bed

Keep doing that thing you do

It's not like I'm in love with you

I'm in love

I'm in love with you

But it's not like I'm in love with you

I'm in love

I'm in love with you

But it's not like I'm in love with you

I'm in love

I'm in love with you

But it's not like I'm in love with you

I'm in love

I'm in love with you

But it's not like I'm in love with you"

Í finish singing and look out at the crowd in front of me to see thousands of people screaming and cheering at me, but when I look to where Michael once stood, he's gone and Crystal is left standing there looking very awkward. The feeling of bliss and pride that just encompassed me, was suddenly replaced with guilt and fear, as my friendship with Michael hangs in the balance.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Once I closed off the performance, I practically run off stage and to the dressing room, tears brimming my eyes, eager to find Michael and explain like I wanted to before. It didn’t take long.

As I walk into the dressing room, I see him standing with his back to me, tapping his foot against the ground.

"Mike, I'm sorry." I question if my voice was even loud enough for him to hear, but sure enough he turns around and I can see the conflict written across his face.

"Was all of that true? Do you really have those kind of feelings for me?" His voice is shaky and hesitant yet still assertive. I can't even form words to answer his question, so I just nod, keeping eye contact with him. "I'm with Crystal. I -I can't - you can't -" He stumbles over his words, taking a deep breath and turning around again. "I don’t feel that way about you." He turns once again. "I never have."

"I know." And then he leaves. He just walks out.

That was the song that sparked the beginning of my career breakthrough, but also ended the nine-year friendship between me and Michael Gordon Clifford.

#michael clifford #michael #cliffo #5sos #5 seconds of summer

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hawkinsschoolcounselor · 2 years

Note

Mike has never been confused about his feelings for El to me. He’s only been absolutely terrible at expressing it… because he is/was 14. That was made very obvious with the grocery store conversation.

I just really don’t think they are going to go for Mike thinking he might have romantic feelings for Will, being all confused, but then pivoting back to Eleven at the end. I just don’t see the Duffers doing that kind of trope.

That being said, I do think we’ll probably get some good strengthening of Will and Mike’s friendship. In the one interview, Noah said Will’s focus is making sure both El and Mike are ok. It’d make sense that Mike goes to pieces after El is kidnapped(?). Would allow Will to try to help his friend, and it would be a nice reversal of the caretaker role Mike has effectively had for the last few seasons.

I’m curious if that’s something you could live with? If Mike remains ride or die El but at least the Byler *friendship* is also developed further (e.g. Will finally gets some development period.) This just seems like the most likely scenario to me.

He has been confused with his feelings. I'm not about to go into it here, as I've written about it before. You should check out my "Why Do You Like?" post about my conceptualization of a gay Mike. It goes over how his feelings are twisted up and how El has been a convenient outlet for these feelings. He didn't do it intentionally, but it's still something he owes her an apology for.

There's no reason for them to artificially create tension in his friendship with Will. Their dynamic changed very abruptly between seasons two and three. It's not hard to imagine this happened very shortly after the Snowball. A strengthening of their friendship would be fine if anything like that was even necessary. Even in season 3, Mike freaked out and tried to apologize when it became clear Will was upset. It doesn't strike you as odd that it wasn't until after this fight that Mike tried to make amends with El?

I like the idea of Will taking care of Mike for a change. What I don't like is the idea that he's being neglected again. It makes it look like he's sacrificing his own happiness for Mike and El. It fits his selfless nature, but he deserves to be very angry if Mike is acting even worse than he did in season 3.

I also don't like the idea that Will's role is now just to be Mike's friend and wingman. The scenario you described really comes across to me as something that benefits Mike's (and El's) development, rather than his own. It makes it look like Will is just there to make sure Mike and El are happy together. So, no, I wouldn't be ok with it.

#stranger things 4 #byler

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mineonmain · 3 years

Text

NOT ME the Series - A Retrospective

Hate to be a Debbie downer bc I know so many people are attached to Not Me (me included), but there’s some loose threads in the show that I think desperately needed tying up, that I feel the need to address. (SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY) Buckle up y’all, this is gonna be MAD long:

Gramblack. Ok what the actual fuck was that. So they didn’t have to make everyone gay, and yes there are signs to Gram being queer if not explicit, but this wasnt queerbaiting, this was just straight up relationship baiting!! A good chunk of the first half of the show was White considering Gram, whether he was friend or foe, taking into account their relationship at uni and in the gang. Everyone was like ‘black and gram so close!!’ Forget the Eugene plot point (which I happily will, Film I’m so sorry honey they dragged you thru this), even without a romantic subtext they were friends?? After Black comes back the only interaction they have is when fighting over Eugene?? Everything they’ve established about Gram, and frankly everyone in the gang is that above all they are ride or die for their friends. Would Gram really value a girl, and not just a girl but a girl who is his best friend’s ex, someone still hung over her ex, and who frankly isn’t really interested in him, over his best friend??? They didn’t get the reunion they (or we) deserved, and honestly somewhere in the show Gram’s entire personality became ‘Eugene-chaser’, like he was purely incidental to the gang, the activism, the friendships, just a pawn in Sean/Todd/Tawi’s games. Maybe it came down to the fact that there were too many storylines to keep track of. It’s impossible to have almost 12 characters with their backstories and developments, and try to develop not only their individual stories and relationships but also progress the plot and conflict. Rough stuff, you get some at the risk of giving up the other, but at the end of the day everything feels incomplete.

The Twins' parents. We got them in the flashbacks, we got White's dad in a couple of eps in the beginning of his double life, and we got that epic scene with Black's mom. We know that they're both estranged with their mom, so it's understandable why we never see her again, altho it might have been cool to maybe see her motivations? Maybe she was tied up with Tawi, or the crazy top cop who threatened Dan in EP13? It just felt so random and disconnected. Especially since she knows her kids, it would've added an extra element of personal danger for the gang if she worked for Tawi. Also, what happens to White and his dad once White is fully integrated in the gang as Black, waaaay before his reveal?? At that point he's not living a double life, it's just a single life? Doesn't his dad wonder where he's staying?? His son has just come back from Russia and he's fucked off to god knows where and he just doesn't care? He's clearly not doing the diplomacy thing, what's happened to that? None of us are toddlers, we all have object permanence, it's not like the moment we stop seeing White's original lifestyle that it doesn't exist anymore?? And now that Black is back, who goes to uni and studies what? Like, just what?????

Tawi. He was supposed to be the big baddie of the show, symbolic of the corrupt Big Corporation, Big Industry, Big Monopoly/Oligopoly, but other than him being bad and us being told that constantly, we know nothing about Tawi. He had no agency, and was pretty 2D as a character. For some reason, Namo seemed to have weight to her character in a way that Eugene just didn't, like Eugene's every move orbited around some guy (Bechdel who), so honestly after the whole Black/Eugene break up, if they just left her alone and maybe focused on developing Tawi's story and relationship to the gang a bit more, I think that could have been cool. Everything about Tawi as a character, not as a symbolic archetype, just seemed so ambiguous. What were his intentions, did he do the things he denied doing or not, how much did he know about the gang and cop Dan, how personally involved was he with the dealings of his company, who was the person higher up he was talking to in the last episode? While he's one of the top men, he's also clearly not the one right at the top. Was it the cop threatening Dan? Todd had a better backstory and development than Tawi, and Tawi was the actual villain; Todd and Black were just equal and opposite antiheros.

Black. Honestly I think the show did my boy Black the dirtiest, especially at the end. He deserved, if not a happy ending, a hopeful one. I don't understand this idea of White having usurped Black's spot in the gang, because the fact of the matter is that they have different skills and could have different roles to play in the group. White talks about Black having sacrificed his role in the group for White, but White sacrificed his whole life for Black!! White has his boyfriend and all his friends around him, what does Black have? His methods weren't the greatest, i'll admit, (altho him putting Todd into a coma was one of the funniest things he could've done, my rage-filled gremlin child), but his intentions were some of the strongest in the group. Just because he isn't as burdened down by feelings as the others, doesn't mean he doesn't have them?? Justice for my boy Black!!

The Ending. Now, don't get me wrong, some parts of the finale were so cathartic and honestly beautiful. The scene where they are rescued from the van, and they realise that in a way they've won, because they don't have to fight from the shadows and alone anymore, something something poetic cinema. The combined relief, joy, shock, bursting out of chest feelings, it was everything. But it felt like too ambiguous of an end. In a way it makes sense, because they didn't actually achieve the tangible thing except for rallying the people to be vocal about their cause and about protesting for social justice, implying that the fight still lives on. However, I think we needed to see some kind of consequence. Todd got his consequence, and we got to see Gumpa (dedicating himself to the future fights for justice) and DanYok (establishing their new status quo) in the new order. I guess I needed to see what happens to Tawi, and also a different closure for SeanWhite. They've both been fighting for so long, especially Sean, that after all the momentum of the first 13 eps, the last one for them (esp 4/4) just falls a bit flat. Ofc they needed to take a moment for themselves, away from the cloud of vigilante activism hanging over their heads constantly, but for me SeanWhite aren't 'still' people. They need movement, they need activity, they need action. It would've suited them better to maybe end the series by showing them back in the garage, planning the next activity, or even outside the garage with other protesters fully in the open public. So much of SeanWhite was centered around them revolving around each other, that once they found each other and effectively stopped moving, it almost felt a bit static.

White's characterisation. This is only for the last few episodes of White, once Black wakes up and White is allowed to be White again. While White has changed his mentality on his priorities after joining the gang, it's like the moment he stops pretending to be Black he loses all of his strength. And I don't only mean physical strength, although that is partially it - he just turns into Sean's personal limpet. And that's all great and fine for Sean, Sean who has had no one truly on his side until White, but I had really felt like White had shaken off some of his 'damsel-in-distress' behavior from his childhood, except he reverts right back to that the moment everyone knows he's White. It's in even greater contrast to Black when we see them together, but after pretending to be Black for so long, I would have expected him to have imbibed some of those behaviors (Sean shouldn't have had to 'take care of him', because frankly White should've been able to take care of himself by that point).

The jumps. 👀

Conclusion: too much. I think a lot of what bothered me is the same thing that bothered me in WHY R U? - there was too much going on. When I saw WHY R U?, I (and I would hazard a guess a good majority of the watchers) could only focus on the two main pairings (Fighter/Tutor, Saifah/Zon). There were probably at least 3 other side pairings that I can't barely remember because frankly it was too much to keep up with. WRU was too much unnecessary romance, and Not Me was almost too much plot. In just 14 episodes, we had to cover the following: The gang's main activities and training, Sean's backstory with Tawi, White's subterfuge and hiding that, White's investigation for Black and his relationship with Todd, Gram's backstory with Black and Eugene, Dan and Yok's romance, White's relationship with his father, the general debates on politics and lawfulness and justice and queer rights in contemporary Thailand, Black's relationship with a variety of people, Dan and his battle between law and his heart, Sean and White's romance. Anyone else think it's a lot? Yeah, it's a lot. Even just by cutting down on one or two of these plot points, it would've been easier to properly focus on and flesh out the rest of the issues, satisfactorily investigating and concluding them.

P.S. None of this is against P'Nuchy, or Off, Gun, First, Fluke, Papang, Mond, Film, or any of the team in the show. A lot of these decisions may have been entirely out of their hands, or were simply a result of how things turned out, without more time or a larger budget to fix things. The only reason I criticise the show this deeply is because I cared about it that much - I think it had so much potential, and lived up to almost all of it, but missed a mark on just a couple things. I am proud of the message that the show put forth, proud of the actors for their physical and emotional commitment to their characters and the story (hello?? oscar for Gun ATP now thank you very much), and proud of the work that the entire cast and crew put in to create this groundbreaking raw political drama, that had romance but was also heartbreakingly real, and important and relevant. A step in the right direction for raising awareness and fighting for social justice and equality, justice for the common man and for queer rights.

And before anyone says that the romance aspect of the show was 'unrealistic' - far from it!! Romance and love is hope, and hope isn't just something that exists, it's something that we have to actively critically manifest and cultivate. Because without hope (for a better future), what are we all fighting for?

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hangezoeenthusiast · 3 years

Text

You failed me

multiple x gn!reader

word count: 2,524

warnings: cursing, yelling, arguing, death, angst, blood, explosion, the egg (it deserves its own warning)

synopis: you guys failed me(us)

(the lyrics go with each person, might not get everyone, and also xd’s part is kinda wonky)

song: rät by penelope scott

I come from scientists and atheists and white men who kill God They make technology, high quality, complex physiological Experiments and sacrilege in the name of public good They taught me everything, just like a daddy should

Quackity, Karl, George, and Sapnap left you. Your mentors, your friends. The ones who taught you everything you knew. They went to build their little “Kinoko Kingdom” while you stayed in the ruins, the dust. “They’ll regret that.” you swore. You built something better, something greater.

It was called “Las Nevadas”. A place where everyone was allowed. They would remember not to fuck with you. They would soon realize that they should watch their back for the rest of their short, stupid lives.

“Watch out, you guys, I'm watching your every move.”

And you were beautiful and vulnerable and power and success God damn, I fell for you, your flamethrowers, your tunnels, and your tech I studied code because I wanted to do something great like you And the real tragеdy is half of it was true

Wilbur majorly fucked up. He was supposed to be with you to the end, your guys’ country, right? No. He left you behind. He went to find peace, find his heaven, while you stayed on earth, wallowing away until your flesh seeped off your rattling bones, rotting away by yourself, with no one to bare witness.

“Why didn’t you bring me with you Wilbur?” you asked his stupid grave on top of the once L’Manburg. “Why did you get the ecstasy, why do I get the remains?”

“I’m coming for you Wilbur, and when I do, we are going to wreck upon justice on everyone who wronged us, wronged you, they will feel our wrath.”

But we've been fuckin' mеan, we're elitist, we're as flawed as any church And this faux-rad West coast dogma has a higher fuckin' net worth I bit the apple 'cause I trusted you, it tastes like Thomas Malthus Your proposal is immodest and insane And I hope someday Selmers rides her fuckin' train

"Y/n!" Technoblade yelled. "I TRUSTED YOU, AND YOU BETRAYED ME, FOR WHAT, TO BLOW UP A STUPID COUNTRY, A COUNTRY THAT WAS DOOMED TO FAIL FROM THE START." He started to battle you, missing every single swing, blinded by fury.

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE.”

"LOOK AT ME GODDAMN IT."

You looked up at him in the eyes and boldly said, "No, Techno, don’t you see, you’re in the wrong here, you’re the one who betrayed me." You were blinded by friendship, you couldn’t see that Tommy had betrayed Techno, and that what the Butcher Army did to Techno was terrible.

"What do you mean Y/n, you know what they did, they wronged me, they used me, they tortured me, they gave me hell, so I gave it back to them, I destroyed the things they loved, the people they loved, you see Y/n, those who have treated me with kindness I will repay that kindness tenfold, and those who treat me with injustice, that use me, that hunt me down, that hurt my friends, I shall repay that injustice a thousand times over, do you understand?"

"No I don't, Techno, you can't do this.” you begged. He pushed you out of the way, "Get out of my way Y/n." “No, I won’t, I won’t let you destroy everything we worked for.”

“Well, then I have to fight you.”

And thus the battle began, Swords clashing against each other, blood spilling from open wounds, friends digging each other into a whole both of them couldn’t get out of. Techno was letting you off easy, he knew his strength, he knew that he could’ve beaten you in one swipe, but he didn’t want to kill you.

So when you had the opportunity, you swept from under his feet, and knocked him down. You placed your blade onto his neck, pressing down until a little drop of blood appeared, “Stay down Technoblade, or I’ll do something worse than try to put you on trial.”

He watched as you walked away from him, trying to save L’Manberg from a worst fate than death itself.

“One day Y/n, you’ll see, I’m on your side.”

I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it's true I wanted to be you and do what you do I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it's true I feel so stupid, and so used I feel so used

"Why would you do that Dream? You didn't have to do that." you interrogated. Dream had stupidly blew up the community house. You both didn't plan that, he had gone behind your back. "I had to Y/n, you wouldn't understand."

"What do you mean I don't understand, you went against my back, we were supposed to-" you cut off yourself, "Dream, don't you understand, you did something stupid, and what did you get, you got stupid jail." "The reason I did that is because I needed to isolate myself from humanity." he said, proudness lacing his words.

"What do you mean?" you questioned. "If anyone knows I can revive people, I'm screwed, so that's why I need to be by myself, yeah it sucks major ass, but at least no one else will know, well, besides you anyways." "I have a task for you Y/n/n, I need you to find a way to bring Tommy and Ghostbur in here."

"Why Dream?"

"I'm going to revive Wilbur."

I was your baby, your firstborn, the hot girl in your comp-sci class And I was Darwin's prep school dream, bred, born and raised to kick your ass I fell for circuit boards, rocket ships, pictures of the stars If you could only be what you pretend you are

"PHILZA MINECRAFT COME BACK HERE." you were chasing Phil, through the woody forest, covered by oak trees. He had information on Technoblade's whereabouts and you needed it. You chased him with your enchanted netherite armor, netherite sword and axe, and a few op potions. Your goal was to capture Philza and interrogate him on where Techno's place was. The thing was, you were his child. His own child trying to kill his own son.

He felt betrayed, his own child turned against him and their brother, their family. "The Butcher Army must've gotten to you somehow." he thought in his head. Surely, his darling Y/n didn't do it on their own will, right?

He was incorrect, you did it because you believed that Techno needed to be brought to justice, by punishment. You believed that your own sibling needed to die, because he was a "liability" to L'Manberg's growth and future. He needed to die because as long as he would live his long life with his little enderman Edward, retired, he would still cause trouble to everything you, Quackity, Tubbo, Fundy, and Ranboo had built.

He pleaded, "Stop Y/n, you don't have to do this." You argued, "I do Philza, as long as he lives, my plans for L'Manberg will forever cease to exist."

He felt like shit, you called him Philza, not Dadza, or Dad, or anything besides his normal name. "Did I screw something up?" he asked himself quietly under his breath. "Yes you did Phil, you took the traitor's side." you had heard Phil mumble.

"HE'S NOT A TRAITOR." Phil yelled at you. "Yes he is, he deserves what he is about to get, I will say it again, where is his base?"

"I'm not saying, Y/n, why are you doing this, Techno is your own sibling." "He's not my sibling anymore, that stopped when he destroyed L'Manberg, you're lucky I forgived you." you declared.

"Y/n/n, please don't do this."

"I have to Dadza, I can't let him roam free."

When I said take me to the moon, I never meant take me alone I thought if mankind toured the sky, it meant that all of us could go But I don't want to see the stars if they're just one more piece of land For us to colonize, for us to turn to sand

Bad had tried to convice you to join the Eggpire. You had no effect while being next to the egg, and he had to take you out. People who had no effect towards the egg had to be eliminated.

He was creepily following you, waiting until you stopped to get a chance to capture you. He had hope that you did have an effect, that you would join the Egg with him. He didn't want to kill you, you were his best friend, besides Skeppy of course.

"Come back here Y/n." he said. "No chance in hell Bad, get the fuck away from me." "HEY, LANGUAGE!" he exclaimed. "No language, get away from me, you're creeping me out."

He threw his trident, spinning in the air, trying to catch up to your frantic steps. You were trying to get to Church Prime, where no one could kill anyone, hopefully Bad would abide to that rule. You were just about to step on Church Prime when you bumped into a hard, armored chest.

You looked up shyly, and saw Punz, with his red eyes reflecting anger. "Where are you going Y/n?" he questioned. "Somewhere." you blankly stated. You were desperate, you didn't want to die, or anything else that Bad was going to do to you. You tried to dodge Punz, but he placed a hand on your shoulder, "Stay right here Y/n."

"No, get away from me, I don't know what's wrong with all of you, but go away, I don't want anything to do with your stupid Eggpire." He raged, and grabbed your wrist heavily, "DON'T TALK ABOUT THE EGG LIKE THAT, IT WILL TAKE CONTROL OF THE SERVER, AND YOU ALL WILL BE ITS SERVANTS." "LET ME THE FUCK GO PUNZ." you screamed. You were wiggling in his grip, trying to escape his lunatic self.

While he was holding you, you saw two other shadows behind you. It was Antfrost and Bad. "What do you guys want from me, I didn't do anything wrong."

"You are against the Egg Y/n, people who are like you and Tommy have to die."

"Well, I'm not dying today." you murmured under your breath. "What was that you said?" Antfrost asked you.

You smirked, "I'm not dying today, I'll tell you one more time, let go of me."

Bad and Antfrost walked closer to you, Punz right behind you, all of them cornering you into a tight spot. "What you going to do about it Y/n, you're cornered."

"You'll know when they get here, but for now, you better run boys."

'Cause we're so fuckin' mean, we're so elitist, we're as fucked as any church And this bullshit West coast dogma has a higher fuckin' net worth I bit the apple 'cause I loved you, and why would you lie? And then I realized that you're just as naïve as I am Oh, you're so traumatized it makes me want to cry

"Tubbo, don't do this." Schlatt had unfortunately found out that you were a spy, that you were on Pogtopia's side. He had ordered Tubbo to kill you with fireworks, to light you on fire, give you blisters all over your body. "Please Tubbs, you're my friend." you pleaded.

"I can't Y/n/n, or something worse will happen." he whispered to you. "What do you mean?" you asked. "He can-" he trailed off, looking somewhere else besides your eyes. "Tubbo, you don't have to do what that stupid bastard tells you to do, you're your own person, with your own thoughts and actions."

"I'm sorry Y/n, I hope you can forgive me."

"TUBBO N-" you was cut off by firewords hitting your skin, making blisters and burn marks all over your body. You lost your second canon life, feeling betrayed by Tubbo. He killed you for what, a stupid father who never cared about him in his entire life, a father who exiled his friends that actually treated him like a person, and not like some random piece of trash.

You respawned in your bed, feeling bruises and bumps mostly on your forearms and your back.

"I'll help you Tubbo, I’ll get rid of him.”

You dumb bitch I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it's true I wanted to be you and do what you do I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it's true I'm so embarrassed, I feel abused

“Come on Y/n/n, come with me.” Punz begged of you. He wanted you to visit the Egg. You didn’t want to be controlled by a stupid omelette. "I'm not Punzo, why are you so obsessed with that stupid thing."

"DON'T SPEAK OF THE EGG LIKE THAT."

You put your hands in front of you, accidentally touching Punz's chest, "Ok calm down buddy." He didn't calm down and instead yelled at you on why you had to join the Eggpire.

"If you join, you will be forever happy."

"If you join you'll get whatever you want."

You were tired of the members of the Eggpire to convince you to join them, you didn't like eggs anyway. "Punz, for the last time, I'm not joining you, stop telling me."

“Then you have to die.”

So fuck your tunnels, fuck your cars, fuck your rockets, fuck your cars again You promised you'd be Tesla, but you're just another Edison 'Cause Tesla broke a patent, all you ever broke were hearts I can't believe you tore humanity apart

“XD!” You were pissed at him, he had destroyed your house, made your friends pissed at you, just everything you liked. All because he wanted you for himself.

He wanted you to be dependent on his every word, and he was being a manipulative psychopath. And you didn’t tolerate that, it was like he was his human counterpart, Dream.

He walked to you with confidence, waiting for to get a hug from you, well, he didn’t get that. You slapped him so hard his head swung to the left.

“WHAT THE FUCK.”

“That’s what you get you stupid son of a bitch. You fucking ruined everything.” “Calm down Y/n/n, what is wrong?” He acted concerned, but you knew that he was faking. He would do anything to get someone’s approval.

“DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT’S WRONG, IT’S YOU, YOUR STUPID PRESENCE IN MY LIFE. YOU KEEP ON WALKING AROUND LIKE YOU FUCKING OWN THE PLACE.”

“Calm down darling, just take some netheri-” you interrupted him by slapping the ore out of his hands. “I don’t need jack shit from you XD, you know what, take back the necklace, I don’t want it.” You pulled the shiny, green emerald necklace off your neck, and pulled XD’s palm out.

You placed the necklace filled with memories, and put it on his hand. You closed up his palm, and walked away, leaving XD to his own accord.

“We could’ve had evertything X.”

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edenmemes · 3 years

Text

assassin’s creed valhalla starters

words within ‘()’ are additional, optional choices! more maybe to be added at a later date. some n/sfw present.

❝ you should see the other man. he got the worst of it. ❞ ❝ and who better to lead us to glory than me? ❞ ❝ i am most at home helping others. ❞ ❝ i’ve waited long enough for you, and you for me. ❞ ❝ thank you for not saying anything about my past. ❞ ❝ know that however far away, you’re always in my thoughts. ❞ ❝ when you see your god, tell them i sent you. ❞ ❝ what you make up in muscles, you’re lacking in spine. ❞ ❝ i almost envy you, to see the world through such a muddy glass and live with such petty concerns. ❞ ❝ i smell the stink of a dozen kingdoms in your beard. ❞ ❝ this feud is not yours, yet you fight it all the same. i find that strange. ❞ ❝ by the look on your face, you have lost your will to live. ❞ ❝ my arms are numb from battle. does it need any dressing? do you think it is a serious wound? ❞ ❝ oh dear. this is not how i foresaw things. not at all! ❞ ❝ should we take this to your chamber? ❞ ❝ i want this. i want you. ❞ ❝ turn around, walk away, and you keep your insides inside. ❞ ❝ stay back! back! i will fight you! ❞ ❝ you look like reddened shit. what happened? ❞ ❝ i have always wanted to experience the world as you do. ❞ ❝ you come like a valkyrie out of a fog. but i have no dead to give you. ❞ ❝ all right, stay close and do as i do. ❞ ❝ home. or...it was home, once. now it is nothing but bone. ❞ ❝ i’ll have no qualms wiping clean your grin. ❞ ❝ just take care. such hatred can make you careless. ❞ ❝ away from your table for a day and you are already lusting for blood. ❞ ❝ if i did not know any better, i would say you are teasing me. ❞ ❝ the dream of new lands is a powerful lure. ❞ ❝ i love climbing up here. makes me feel as high as a raven. ❞ ❝ if i don’t find your horse, i will steal you a new one. ❞ ❝ i feel somewhat trapped. in this room, in this settlement, in this life. ❞ ❝ you are lost in a sea-storm of your own making. ❞ ❝ the poet in you sings once again. ❞ ❝ tonight, we will eat and drink like gods and wake in a kingdom made new. ❞ ❝ i wish i understood you better. for those i do not understand, i do not trust. (and i cannot stomach a lack of trust.) ❞ ❝ i’ve been called worse. ❞ ❝ you have nothing to fear from me. i bear you no ill will. ❞ ❝ you are a shadow of your father. weak and witless. ❞ ❝ what is this? is this...are we in hell? ❞ ❝ keep company with kings and you will soon have a crown of your own. ❞ ❝ a toothless cub may grow to be a dangerous wolf. ❞ ❝ you are far too young to speak so wise. ❞ ❝ i need clear, sound judgement. i need you. ❞ ❝ kind and courageous people live the best lives, but it can be a difficult path to keep. ❞ ❝ i want to say...i love you. and i have for some time. ❞ ❝ you smell that? the stink of jealousy. (of our budding friendship, i think). ❞ ❝ ah, while i have you, i’m reminded...i have this for you. ❞ ❝ your lies are just like you. big and bold. ❞ ❝ don’t excuse yourself. you enjoy this too much. ❞ ❝ you've come back. why are you wasting your time with me? ❞ ❝ care to sing a song? helps me pass the time. ❞ ❝ that is twice you have earned my admiration. ❞ ❝ you have only the setting sun to tell you when to stop. ❞ ❝ i want to know what you know. name your price. ❞ ❝ people like you deserve something worse than death. ❞ ❝ they called me a lout, a disgrace. they were right. ❞ ❝ i will have to get used to watching the sights of war from afar now. ❞ ❝ there’s no other way. fight or hide. it’s up to you. ❞ ❝ do not think me a coward. i am not afraid of war. ❞ ❝ friendships end. often at the point of a spear. ❞ ❝ i will make you beg as your father begged. ❞ ❝ (until that time,) it would be best to keep all discussions about... about us to yourself. ❞ ❝ without you i would have lost my way a thousand times. ❞ ❝ you have no other friends. so tread lightly here. ❞ ❝ be it a blessing or a curse, family is always first. ❞ ❝ let’s not walk too far with that idea. i need you right where you are. ❞ ❝ you bested me. yet, i’m the one left standing. ❞ ❝ it’s a pleasure to meet you at least. ❞ ❝ you and your people here have done more for me than i could ever repay. ❞ ❝ you have my highest respect, regard, and trust. ❞ ❝ you’re not shy, are you? ❞ ❝ if we do this, you’ll earn the right to call me friend ten-thousand fold. ❞ ❝ does this have the stench of betrayal to you? ❞ ❝ today has meant so much. we rode, we fought, we drank, we laughed. (you showed me your world.) ❞ ❝ your end was written the moment you came for me. ❞ ❝ i am a sellsword. i ask what i please, and i take what i’m owed. ❞ ❝ you move and i will take your eyes. you hear me? ❞ ❝ i will leap first. on my word, you must follow. ❞ ❝ many times i wished to tell you. wished to say what was in my heart and what i desired. (but duty kept me from it.) ❞ ❝ these wounds will heal quickly. you’re lucky. ❞ ❝ anything to help you feel at home. ❞ ❝ our friendship is the best thing to come from this mess. ❞ ❝ you will be remembered for this, for years to come. ❞ ❝ i thought i had lost you. for good this time. ❞ ❝ you have shown me a great kindness. it is only fitting that i do the same. ❞ ❝ the mess you’re in...you don’t know the half of it. ❞ ❝ you have drawn a dark conclusion about me, haven’t you? (that is all well and good. i’ve drawn some about you as well.) ❞ ❝ you seem...strangely familiar. ❞ ❝ here i am, an upright man who never once learned how to bend the knee. and yet...i shall try. ❞ ❝ that’s a bread knife. do you mean to butter me? ❞ ❝ is that not something you worry over? ❞ ❝ a blind pursuit of vengeance has made you predictable. ❞ ❝ no matter where you are, or how far you travel, i will hunt you down. ❞ ❝ i came for you, looking for a friend and ally. ❞ ❝ people change. it may be that you change with them, or you go your separate ways. ❞ ❝ i wish you whatever peace you may find in this new life you’ve found. ❞ ❝ i want your word: you will follow my orders. ❞ ❝ the day is new, and the air is bracing. are you ready for the fight ahead? ❞ ❝ er...good to meet you as well? ❞ ❝ what riches are worth so much misery, and the deaths of honorable men and women? ❞ ❝ my destiny is mine to weave. ❞ ❝ my road forward has been a muddy one. slick with blood and tears. (but we can reach its end together.) ❞ ❝ it is a wise leader who considers the needs of others. ❞ ❝ i think my mouth has gotten me in enough trouble today. ❞ ❝ at the end of all things, you will find yourself with nothing but your regrets. ❞ ❝ you saw fit to keep me guessing through your fits of madness. ❞ ❝ by all the gods, what was that? ❞ ❝ i was...restless. a quiet walk alone clears the head. ❞ ❝ when winter is past, summer will come and wind you in a flowered skirt, for you are beauty and shall not wither. ❞ ❝ ...unless you had a more interesting day planned for us? ❞ ❝ i do hope you see it now, for all you have done for me. ❞ ❝ your passion, your strength. i have never met such a burning soul. ❞ ❝ i have no guilt nor regret for what we have done, but we should be careful. ❞ ❝ i see before me a person full of passion, vigor, and a love for their people. ❞ ❝ if i wanted to hear you talk shit, i’d cut out your tongue and shove it up your ass. ❞ ❝ you! you look stronger than most of the others. ❞ ❝ your hatred for me burns bright. i could warm my balls on it. ❞ ❝ you’re quite like your arms: incredibly thick. ❞ ❝ i fought as i do, as hard as i do, to survive. (for i know what awaits us in the end. only darkness.) ❞ ❝ a shameful trick. you are your father’s child. ❞ ❝ you destroyed my life. i will take yours. ❞ ❝ you snore a little, like a wounded bear. ❞ ❝ that’s when i knew i would live and die for you. ❞ ❝ i’m going to pretend your last words were taken by the wind. ❞ ❝ i might still kill you yet, if your prattling doesn’t cease. ❞ ❝ you are weak like your father was weak. (you dance better than you fight.) ❞ ❝ have you ever seen muscles as massive as mine? ❞ ❝ i’m honored by your faith in me. and your confidence. ❞ ❝ after my missteps, i worry what you must think of me. ❞ ❝ with so much blood in the water and death in the air, i’d like to know your name and purpose. ❞ ❝ i have a good feeling about this place. ❞ ❝ you helped me reclaim what i had lost in myself. ❞ ❝ you speak of honor. where’s yours? ❞ ❝ you will throw away all reason to defend what you sworn to. ❞ ❝ you really are like a hero out of folk tales. ❞ ❝ how much would you sacrifice to be freed of fate’s shackles? (would you give your tongue, your hand, your sight?) ❞ ❝ there’s no power strong enough to do what you say. ❞ ❝ please, you must fight for me. who knows what vile people might come to harm me? ❞ ❝ i have no need to count my kills. they number too many. ❞ ❝ i appreciate you for all of your qualities. ❞ ❝ not even the gods can change fate. ❞ ❝ i think it is time i take my leave. ❞ ❝ you really thought my life was in danger? (and you risked your own life...) ❞ ❝ the path ahead is bright, with glory at its end. ❞ ❝ it is easy to lose one's way on the road to glory. do not let false victories blind you to what is true. ❞ ❝ the act of leaving so beloved a home, there is a sadness to it. ❞ ❝ so there’s nowhere...you call home? ❞ ❝ all things end. ruins are not a warning, they are a testament. ❞ ❝ be nice to sleep in a real bed when this is over. ❞ ❝ in my sleep i dream. and in my dreams i see an end to the doom that will grip the earth once again. ❞ ❝ even when we win, we lose. ❞ ❝ i am as good with my lips, as i am with my tongue. ❞ ❝ is this your idea of a pleasant ride through the country? ❞ ❝ no whispering god brought me here. i brought myself. ❞ ❝ i would like very much to pass some time with you. ❞ ❝ ...and that’s how i got that scar. ❞ ❝ do i now haunt your dreams? ❞ ❝ it was never in their character to lead, it was always within yours. ❞ ❝ so easily wounded by words. imagine the ruin my axe would inflict on your flaccid ego. ❞ ❝ i have felt this way for some time now. i care for you. ❞ ❝ i have not felt safe since then. not really. ❞ ❝ how long have you been chasing me? seventeen winters? eighteen? ❞ ❝ you are not always to be trusted. your passions overcome you. ❞ ❝ i like you. you may help me here or step on me...and by the look of you i’d welcome either. ❞ ❝ it is good to have you in this fight. ❞ ❝ you need only know my impressive scale and flawless build. ❞ ❝ i am better than any man here. ❞ ❝ i can tell by looking at you, you are not a great warrior. (you know it too, there is no reason to deny this.) ❞ ❝ i am looking for honor, and have become lost as a result. ❞ ❝ many apologies. you are no child, simply a frail and fully-grown fool. ❞ ❝ i was stupid, selfish, reckless, blind, boneheaded, and i smell like blood and shit. ❞ ❝ anything to say for the mess you led us to? ❞ ❝ how was your...first kill? ❞ ❝ you squirm like that and my axe will miss your neck! unpleasant for both of us. ❞ ❝ i know you would defy me to the death, fighting for a glorious end. that i will not allow. ❞ ❝ most men choose to be loud or stupid. impressive, that you managed both. ❞ ❝ you are a great warrior. conquerer of this land and that of your birth. ❞ ❝ you’re chasing shadows like a madman howling at the moon! ❞ ❝ quite a hit you took. how many were lost? ❞ ❝ well fought! even if your wits were somewhat rattled. ❞ ❝ we suffered no losses in this fight, and the men who humiliated us are dead. what is there to say? ❞ ❝ i would like to be close to you. ❞ ❝ if you are a warrior with honor running like sunlight in your veins, then you may help me fulfill my destiny. ❞ ❝ you are a long way from any warm hearth, warrior. Is this where you call home? ❞ ❝ am i to go the rest of my days without love or attention? i think not. ❞ ❝ the gods favor you. they always have. ❞ ❝ the others, they are like clubs. blunt and ungainly, you are nimble, like a knife. ❞ ❝ people with eyes that gleam like yours are always up to something more. ❞ ❝ only a fool stays awake all night worrying. you are tired when you get up, and the problem is still not solved. ❞ ❝ i liked you from the first. i saw something in you that captivated me. (as if a forgotten memory of an old friendship had suddenly resurfaced.) ❞ ❝ you've done nothing but give me your blind word! ❞ ❝ did you bring me any treasure? ❞ ❝ the woodsmoke from your firepit does sting the eyes. but the warmth is welcome. ❞ ❝ it is not something i can speak on. or wish to. ❞ ❝ i'm with you. only say the word. ❞ ❝ until we cut off this serpent's head, it will poison us, day by day, drop by drop. ❞ ❝ get some rest and return here at first light. ❞ ❝ i missed having you at my side. how i wished i could have taken you along on my travels. ❞ ❝ i do not like this, but i will not stop you. ❞ ❝ i have waited too many years for this day. when ___ stands before us, give me the final blow. ❞ ❝ why do you carry such a useless burden? let it go. ❞ ❝ i have waited years for this, but i will not risk losing it through rashness. ❞ ❝ i cannot fathom your game. you are either a young fool...or deceptively wise. ❞ ❝ your confidence blinds you to so much in plain sight. ❞ ❝ it’s good to be here, with you and your people. (i feel my life has found a new road.) ❞ ❝ there has always been war, even among the gods. ❞ ❝ my honor has been stained. until it's wiped clean, i want nothing else. ❞ ❝ i lack the patience for pole fishing. i would have better luck with my bow. ❞ ❝ if we tell all our stories, we’ll be here for a week. ❞ ❝ can you teach me the art of archery? ❞ ❝ bury the past. build the future. ❞ ❝ i missed you. your clear head and your courage. (we have not had enough of both in recent months.) ❞ ❝ i have a good feeling this war is near its end. ❞ ❝ explain in plain words why you have willfully disobeyed my commands. (do you mock me?) ❞ ❝ the gods favor you. they always have. ❞ ❝ my love for you rises tall and strong, like the tree of life. ❞ ❝ the prize is some of my time. (a walk in nature, maybe more if that is where our conversation takes us.) ❞ ❝ together, we are unstoppable. ❞ ❝ it is natural to fear change. to resist it. (but all things change, and all things end.) ❞ ❝ you said nothing of this to me, not a word. ❞ ❝ so long as men and women fight to secure honor and freedom, their allegiance hardly matters to me. ❞ ❝ i care for you. i do not know how to say it any other way. ❞ ❝ love can burn brighter near death. ❞ ❝ i knew this would be difficult, but sometimes the weight bears down heavily. ❞ ❝ you are young and still foolish, so i will spare you your life. (but cross me again or harm anyone i cherish, and you will join your friends in hell.) ❞ ❝ if you are as brave as you appear, you will come. ❞ ❝ this is not a natural quiet. it's as if a curse has befallen this place. ❞ ❝ there was a curse here long before i came along. ❞ ❝ we’ll forge a warrior from your softness, hammered on the anvil of war. ❞ ❝ you are different than the kind my flights of fancy attract. burdened, decorated and…delicate. ❞ ❝ i do not know what else to say. m-my memories are faint, hazy. ❞ ❝ how are you doing? you survived a serious blow. ❞ ❝ we’ll weave our sagas together, thread upon thread. ❞ ❝ i try to use my knowledge to help others. i am only a threat to those who fear the unknown. ❞ ❝ slap some moss on that gash and wrap it well. ❞ ❝ a knife to the back is a wound that never heals. ❞ ❝ with me you have wisdom! glory! power! what more do you need? ❞ ❝ if your hell is real, i’m glad you’ll get to see it. ❞ ❝ to fight beside such legends is an honor. (i've only heard tales of your conquests. now i get to live them.) ❞ ❝ i have tried to live well. it is enough that the gods know that. ❞ ❝ a cloud hangs over you. is something wrong? ❞ ❝ you have plunged my city into chaos. ❞ ❝ my sword is gore-greedy. i am ready to fight. ❞ ❝ accept your fate and die a coward, here before your people... and i will spare the rest. ❞ ❝ you would take the rescue for yourself, so the victory song is written about you? ❞ ❝ kneel, and i will spare your life. ❞ ❝ it has been some time. what brings you so far to see me? ❞

#rp meme #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #long post for ts /

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theastrologylady · 3 years

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Portrait of a Capricorn Venus:

These natives are complex at first, no way around it. Extremely guarded, and with impossibly high standards, these individuals have no problem being on their own. The type to be totally fine with not marrying even if they’re 60 because they haven’t found the person they seek (unless the Venus is badly afflicted). Same goes for friendship with this placement. They learn to pick their friends so carefully, by the time they’re settled in life you’d think they hand selected the most impressive individuals in the world off a silver tray. As all Capricorn placements, they keep their eye on something very specific and nothing else will do, they will not settle. There is something to be admired there, like all Capricorn placements they show us that real self respect comes from being true to your wishes and desires without shame.

Capricorn energy is very individualistic. If they are into you, you might not realize unless you develop telepathic powers of sorts with them because they will not hint you about it in the slightest. If they do, it’ll be something like this: they avoid you and don’t make eye contact with you if you speak to them. The reason is they hate to lose their sense of cool (and generally these are well liked individuals that are known to be king/queen cool) so if they are deliberately avoiding you, there is a very good chance they kind of like you. Or that you at least make them nervous. To impress one, be poised, have great manners, a very witty sense of humor, be a true gentleman/lady, but more than anything these natives value integrity and honesty. So if these are not things you are by nature, do not try to fool them, they’re like an old grandparent that has lived enough to see through bullshit.

Once you have one of these natives, whether as friend or lover, they’ll be some of THE MOST realiable people you’ll ever have in your life. A true ride or die. They leave a Taurus, or Aquarius in the dust in that sense. The solidarity of a Capricorn Venus is something beyond this world, they will drop anything and everything for someone they care about in a heartbeat when they are needed - and even when they are not. They will stick with you when you’re on top of the mountain, or sit with you in the fifth ring of hell if that’s where you are at that moment. They will crack jokes and be silly, they will support you no matter what. In a relationship, once they’re committed (and they will be honest with you when they are not committed completely) they are there to stay, no matter what happens along the way your Capricorn Venus lover will stick by you. The only things that will truly push them away is if they feel dishonesty from you, lack of integrity or respect for them or the relationship.

Pay attention to the words these natives offer you. They don’t use language frivolously with the people in their lives.These natives truly mean what they say with every fiber of their being. If they tell you they love you, they mean unconditionally, if they tell you they want to be with you forever, they are actually offering you their heart completely. The honesty and integrity Capricorn embodies is put completely into what these natives perceive as beautiful, in how they show love. They are the storybook lover and friend, because when they care, it’s as authentic a sensation as you can humanly grasp.

#capricorn #astrology #zodiac #astrology aesthetic #capricorn venus #venus in capricorn #venus astrology #venus signs #venus #venus placements

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neovisioned · 4 years

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♡ꜜ out of my league﹫mark lee

out of my league - fitz and the tantrums

pairing : mark x reader (f)

genre : tiny angst, fluff, smut with some plot, bestfriend!mark, college!au, best friends to lovers.

warnings : weed, making out, fingering, unprotected sex, praising.

word count : +4k

synopsis : your best friend Mark Lee tells you all the things he believed, you were always out of his league.

Mark Lee has been in love with the same person for as long as he could remember. It's something he took some time to understand, days to wrap his head around.

Where do you draw the line between deep friendship, platonic love between friends and a connection running deeper, a love that seeks more than the label "friends" ?

Laying on your bed, his right hand throws a tennis ball in the air, easily catching it while his left hand hold the rolled up paper between two fingers.

It's a shame, the smoke he's blowing out of his lungs is probably sticking to your bed sheets, ones he noticed you washed the moment he dropped his body on your bed.

Soft rose fragrance, traces of an exotic fruit he can not pin point, though Mark is sure he could recognise the perfume of your detergent between thousands of others.

Heavy sigh, smoke escaping his lips like a dragon dissolving in the air, heavy eyelids closing in front of his brown irises. He really should stop smoking, Mark thinks. It's a black hole in his wallet, it is not that good for his health and fuck, does it makes his mind wonder.

Correction, Mark should stop smoking around you. Because, whenever he does, his mind might search in the deepest, darkest folds of his brain for a new topic, he'll always, forever, come back to you.

Mark Lee has been in love with you for as long as he can remember.

It's something he's been aware of for some years now. It's crazy how he can pinpoint the moment his mind clicked, the moment he put two and two together. He can still visualise the moment his heart went from a friendship he'd die for to a love he'd die for, one so strong he, himself, was dumbfounded by his years long blindness.

It happened right before prom, second to last year of high school. Mark Lee remembers when you stepped out of your father's car (he doesn't trust any other boy but Mark, he insisted on driving you to your school's dance).

Pretty deep blue dress, it's his favourite colour on his favourite person. You did not do anything special to your hair, only added a bit more makeup. Though, it's not your appearance that made everything click, you've always been pretty, it wasn't the first time your friend noticed.

Rather, it's when your date shows up. It's when one of the school's popular kid shows up and makes you dance that he understands. He wants it to be him so bad. He wants to make you twirl, he wants to make you laugh.

Mark understands it isn't just him being mad that you're not answering your phone, it's love. Jealousy, green monster eating away at his heart when he wonders if you're still with him, it's a hand tightly wrapping around the muscle when he wonders if you're going to fall into someone else's arms.

Mark remembers it, it was five years ago. Late summer night where he stayed on his phone for too long, love sick kid scrolling through pictures and pictures of his prom waiting for a text from his best friend.

He didn't say anything, maybe Mark was a bit of a coward, and you were out of his league.

“Mark ?”

From all the things you best friend loves about you, if he had to pick, it'd be the way you say his name. No matter the intonation, no matter the context, the men loves the way it sounds coming out of your lips.

He thinks he won't ever get enough of it, it's intoxicating, makes him think he has the prettiest name after your own.

Eyelids slowly open, tired smile stretching his lips. You're steading in front of your bed, freshly showered, hand turning your small projector on.

“Hm ?”, he doesn't bother answering with words, humming softly. His head turns to the side, following your movements around the bedroom he knows like the back of his hand.

“This one or...That one ?”, you ask, playing with your remote to show your best friend two animation movies you both saw too many times.

“First one.” You've noticed over time, his voice always gets deeper when he smokes, brown eyes always get a shade darker.

“Alright, baby chose.”

Ah, correction. If there's one thing that Mark loves, it's the pet names you give him. So natural, honey filled, he wished you meant them.

Baby, babe, darling. He loves it all, he wants it all, he wants you all.

Unaware of his thoughts, you finally crawl up next to him, the shirt you're wearing as your pyjamas riding up, Mark takes another hit at that.

Familiar sound of Netflix resonates in your room as you take yet another remote and turn your lights off, before gesturing towards your friend. You're not an avide smoker but, you infale the smoke a few times before giving the rolled up paper back to the brunette.

Mark knows what's about to happen, whenever your movie night has a bit of green, the movie gets long lost behind while you two would rather speak about anything and everything. After years of friendship, you'd think you two would've took and turned every subject under the pale moon but, Mark definitely did not expect this.

Hands free, he crushes the cigarette on the special painted bowl you have for him, Mark also loves the way you have some things for him on your house as if he lives with you.

Your right hand is quick to find his left hand, an old habit your have. Your fingers stretch against his own, comparing sizes like kids flirting, swinging your hands from left to right. Your arm easily gets tired by holding your hand up in the air like this, but the warmth of Mark's hand and the way his fingertips rough by his guitar strings brush against your palm every now and then feels like home.

“How do you know when you're in love ?”, your voice's soft, mindlessly humming to the song in the animation movie Mark chose. Is that the topic you decided to bring up...? Mark's hand stays still for a moment, following your own hand's movement as he thinks for a while.

“Don't give me that “You just know” bullshit.”, you mumble when he stays quiet for a bit too long.

“But I think you do, just know. I think it's different for everyone.”, he starts, speech slightly altered by the green herb intoxicating his mind.

“How is it... For you ?”, you ask. See, you know Mark had some crushes here and there, but you don't think he has ever been in love or, at least, he never told you.

“It's... Loving the way they say your name, wanting to be with them as much as possible. It's... Craving to be as close as possible.” and unconsciously, his fingers wrap around yours.

“It's finding happiness in their joy, sharing their sadness. It's small things like memorising the perfume they wear and what food they dislike.”

The brunette stays quiet for a moment, heavy eyes look upon your locked hands in the darkness, chest light, mind foggy.

“It's them feeling like home.”, he finally says.

Mark smiles to himself, you do feel like home, you make everything feel like home. From the way you have a pillow and the way you keep a toothbrush for him, to the way you always feel so warm and safe.

Thankfully for you, the lack of light hides the small blush creeping on your cheeks.

Mark doesn't know, you've been in love with him for years, though you've been aware for a bit longer. His confession takes your breathe away with a heavy sigh, you squeeze his hand.

“I was in love with you.”

Was, you take the safe route as the words fly out of your mouth before you can even understand. Even if he's shocked, you can play the past card.

“I was in love with you too.”, silence doesn't last long as Mark let's out as well, eyes on the movie even though he isn't paying any attention : his favourite line just played and he didn't even let a giggle out.

The words make your ears ring, skin burn red, heart beat against your ribcage. He was too...? He was. He isn't anymore.

“Why didn't you tell me ?”, you breath out, turning to the side. You use an elbow to support your body, you dare look at your best friend's face.

It's crazy how he still have the still has the same baby face you've always known, the same pretty eyes and the same smile, his jaw got sharper with years and voice deeper and yet, he's still the same. He's home.

Mark, him, doesn't dare look at you for a second. Before he does, soft eyes looking directly into yours. Why didn't he tell you ? He knows why, he has a list of reasons why and another list of reasons why he should've told you he'd rather not think about right in this moment.

“You're out of my league.”, he breathes out. You can read your best friend like a book, you know he is not joking when he tells you so. And yet, you can't wrap your head around the idea.

“I— What, no !”, you're almost whispering and screaming at him at the same time, getting up to sit on your knees. He was out of your league, he has always been, you never—.

“You were—. You are out of mine.”, you tell him, almost dumbfounded. For a split second, it feels like someone's finally giving you the dream you've always wanted and, the moment it touches your hands, it slips through your fingers.

Can you be nostalgic of something you've never even experienced ? And yet, your mind grabs onto a single thing. Present tense, you're still out of his league, he still thinks so.

In his semi-high state, the brunette chuckles out, as dumbfounded.

You wonder if there are feelings still unknown to humans because this, the pull you're feeling at the strings of your heart and the lump in your throat combined to the angering heat taking over your body aren't emotions you're used to feeling at the same time.

“Hey, what's wrong ?”, your best friend asks, an arm wrapping around your neck to pull you closer. You're sure it's supposed to be for hug, one you'd happily accept if you weren't in this very situation. Both forearms stop your body from colliding against his, Mark frowns.

In another situation, he'd be able to read you like an open book and, maybe he's thankful he isn't completely sober right now. If he wasn't slightly high, he'd be as red.

“Are you...Are you still in love with me ?”, you ask. It's almost a whisper, one Mark is sure he would've caught if it wasn't for the almost silent scene going on in the long forgotten movie.

Is he still in love with you ? Yes. His mind screams a loud, obnoxious yes. His body screams another loud and obnoxious yes and yet. Yet, Mark stays silent for what feels like minutes. He knows he is, he's sure of it, he doesn't know if he should say it.

Yes, yes, yes.

“Yeah.”

To be in love with your best friend, to confess your love after years, decades, even.

Such a simple word and yet, it hangs in the air, you can almost make it out in the slight darkness of the room. When Mark has the ability to put words on how he feels, you can't put anything on what goes on in your brain and body when he says the simple truth. You think your heart might fall out right into your best friend's hand, if he did not already have it. Your mind twist the word again and again just to find a fault, a break, a rupture.

There isn't none, he's in love with you.

There's another few seconds where you stay silent. You decide actions speak louder than words. Where Mark pulled you into a hug, you pull him into a kiss you've been craving for years.

Carnal need sleeping deep in both your minds, it doesn't need much to be awakened, burning a fire louder than hell's. Your lips touch his. Its shy, hesitant but, when Mark's arm tighten around your neck, no words need to be spoken.

The sweet, innocent, childlike kiss turns desperate in matter of seconds. Your best friend pulls you closer, closer, closer. He catches your leg between his, pushes your chest against his to the point where you can feel his heart hammering.

Lips move in harmony, common rhythm is quickly found and, you whine the moment he pulls away.

“Tell me.”, he breathes out against your lips, it's a desperate plea for something he had been waiting to hear, something he thought he'd never hear. “Say it.”, it's demanding, greedy. You give in easily.

“I'm in love with you.”

There's a weight pulled out of your chest, you'd chant it again and again if you could. You'd scream in if you could, you'd breathe it against his skin.

The brunette pulls you into a bruising kiss, he pours his soul out, hand cupping the back of your neck.

If this is a dream, Mark is determined to not let it go. Using his body at his advantage, positions are reversed, the brunette quickly towards over you. You switched you could turn the light back on but, the colourful lights of the movie dance against his jawline and shine against his wet lips, you decide your best friend looks like a painter's muse.

“There hasn't been a single day where I haven't thought about you.”, he breathes pretty words against your skin, taking his lips from your mouth to your jaw. It's loving, deep kisses, each to mean something.

“There hasn't been a single day where I haven't thought about being more to you, wished we were more.”

More, more, more. You want more too, you need more too. You refuse to let go now.

“We can be, we can.”, it's frantic. You cup his face with your hands, bringing him closer. “Spent nights thinking about what we could be.”

It makes flowers bloom in his chest, he isn't able to take his lips away from your skin. The tip of his nose digs in your cheek, he inhales deeply. Oh, how he loves the soap you use.

“What did you see ?”, he asks, lips peppering kisses down your neck, hand gripping your shirt. You're quick to pull it up above your hips. First wanting to completely pull it off your body, it seems the brunette isn't patient enough.

His lips leave your neck to your tummy, butterfly kisses here and there until he stops to your panties.

“Us. Together. Living tog—.”

Your sentence's quickly cut off by your best friend, maybe a lot more now, pressing his tongue flat against the fabric of your panties.

If you weren't aware of how wet you were getting, you sure were now.

“Living together, yeah ?”, he asks, bringing his face closer to yours again right after disregarding his shirt somewhere. There's a few seconds where you pose, shamelessly taking in the men's figure.

Forehead against yours, his digits run along the line of your underwear. He's as nervous as you are, as shaken up as you are yet, you two have never been more certain of one thing that doesn't need to be said anymore.

Mark bites down on his lip, you almost hear tje mechanism in his head twisting and turning to find the right way to ask you.

You beat him at it anyways, nodding as your arms wrap around his neck.

There's one thing you'll never tell him, you spent night dreaming about a future and other were filled with thoughts of his fingers.

The guitar player had pretty hands, even prettier when they wrapped around the neck of his guitar or when he picked as some strings.

“'was too scared to tell you.”, he says and, you'd tell him you know. You know exactly how it feels, the fear of rejection by the one you've know you're entire life. You'd tell him it doesn't matter now that you now if you could.

His fingers stop you from articulating right, index and middle finger greedily collecting the wetness between your folds, the brunette doesn't wait much longer before pushing two digits in.

“I—Mark.”, there it is, a moan of his name that intoxicates Mark more than any other drug. Pupils grow wide, ears greedy to hear more. It's him, him managing to make you moan so softly in the dead of the night, him that has you wrapped around his finger.

“Fuck, say my name again.”, it's another desperate plea, say his name again so he knows it isn't a vivid dream he's going to wake up from, say his name until it's the only thing rolling out of your tongue.

You easily oblige when he starts moving his fingers, slowly yet, in a way that quickly had you gasping for air.

There's nothing rough in his actions, expect from the way his teeth gaze at the skin of your neck before softly biting down just to sooth to spot with his tongue afterwards.

It's agonising, like he wants to make sure he maps out your body to remember it perfectly after tonight. His fingers curl and drag against your walls, he remembers how and where.

His free hand creeps under your raised shirt, quickly finding your chest as his mouth finds your again.

There, he catches every sweet sound you make like he doesn't want any body else to hear them, tongue tastes yours as they lazily battle.

“Shit, baby. Just like that, god.”, when you think Mark couldn't get any better, his fingertips brush against a spot that has your hips raising up, slowly rocking against his hand.

“Right there ?”, you nod frantically as he does it again and again, lazily fingering you whilst he lets your hips grind against his digits.

“So fucking pretty.”, it's a murmur once he detaches his lips from your own, wet and red by the exchange.

It's not the first time Mark calls you pretty but at this very moment, it's different.

His wrist twist the right way just as he's about to pick the pace up and the familiar feeling grows alongside the flower blooming in your chest as Mark whisperes sweet nothings into your ear.

He can feel it, the way your walls clench around his fingers, it has his cock throbbing in his sweats. Carnal desire to feel you wrapped around him as his fingers speed up until you come undone around them.

It's a mess of his name and profanities you hope your neighbours aren't hearing.

“Want more, want you.”, you babble once you come down from your high, sweat collecting around your hairline, chest irregularly raising up and down.

When Mark seems to take too long to process your words, you take matters into your own hand.

A moment, Mark struggles to find his words and the other, his back hits the bed with a soft gasp.

He's quick to raise with his elbows, almost having whiplash when you sit down on his lap after taking off your ruined and soaked panties.

“Let me help you with that.”, there's a slight shyness in your voice Mark decides he'd die for when your clumsily work on the strings of his grey sweats.

Unspoken words, soft silence when you look into his eyes and help him push the fabric down his thighs. The air is thick, your heart beats harder and harder, your chest swells when Mark pulls you closer by your hips.

“I've been in love with you.”, he starts as you raise, lining your core with his hard member, one your eyes lingered on before he opened his mouth. There's a pause, your lips part as to say something when you slowly sit down, but no sound comes from your mouth when Mark's leaking head pushes inside.

“For so— so fucking long.”, he uses the last bits of air in his lungs to let it out, voice cracking when you sit inch by inch.

You wonder how you went so long without telling him, telling him you love him feels too good to take it back or ever again. There's a slight part of you wondering where you'd be right now if you told him sooner but you're quick to push it away.

Both hands cup his face as you bring him closer for a kiss as you fully settle on his lap, though the exchange doesn't last long. There's a beautiful groan coming from the men in front of you just as you moan out from the sensitivity, the fulness.

Mark's red lips fall open the moment you start moving up and down on him, eyes rolling back the slightest bit like he forces himself to look at you as you ride him. But, when his groans turn into moans, the brunette hides his face in the crook of your neck, arms tightly wrapping around your waist.

You don't think your can be any closer, chest against chest, your mouth to his ear as he mumbles about how you were made for him.

Up and down, up and down, your legs start burning but you keep moving on top.

“Fuck, I love you.”, it slips out when his hips meet yours halfway, not that you can say it, you swear you won't stop doing it at any given occasion.

Mark answers my sucking on your neck, probably drawing blood as he more boldly snaps his hips against yours.

You find the same desperation as when he was kissing you, carnal need wanting to be met, he fucks into you just like he means it, switching between deep and slow to fast and short snaps.

For the second time, you feel it tighten, knot threatening to burst at any moment. If you aren't moaning, your mouth hands silently open and thankfully, Mark can tell you're getting close by the way you're clenching around him.

“You're doing so good, so so good for me.”, voice almost unrecognisable, the way you can feel every vein and the way he pulse tells you he's as close, if not more.

“Come with me.”

After years of tuning your body to his voice, it follows the command almost immediately, there's a few seconds where the brunette snaps his hips, slowly, deeply, right before letting a draw out moan against your neck.

It's the last thing you hear, the way he moans you name breathlessly against your skin before you follow right behind, coming right around him like he hoped so.

Moans and body against body sound abruptly stop for heavy breathing and soft whines, you blink a few times, forehead against Mark's baked shoulder.

He smells like the apple shampoo he almost wears, he feels like home when his arms tightly wrap around your body and rock from side to side, almost lolling you to sleep. He feels safe, familiar, comfortable.

And, right before you fall deep into sleep, you hear him slightly chuckle at his second favourite movie line.

#neovisioned #mark lee #mark smut #mark lee smut #nct smut #nct 127 smut #nct dream smut #super m smut #nct fluff #nct aus #nct scenarios

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phoebeseb · 3 years

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Pt1. How did the change of rules in Last Life impacted the gameplay?

Just a small preface - I have a lot of data. So much so, that if I took the time to process it all before releasing it on a single post here, it would take me like a month (I am a college student with stuff to do) and you would probably have forgotten that this survey even existed and I would have a behemoth of a post, so I decided to divide this and make a post per question

So, about the first question

Out of the 362 answers, 215 people decided to elaborate further more, for which I am grateful, but also please, write less next time XD (jk the more the merrier). If you want to know more about the arguments in favour and against this change, keep reading...

Pros/ in favour of the change:

Incentives for early deaths – increases pace

More paranoia/tension/suspense

It forces actions, instead of just reaction – no waiting for red names

More betrayals

Added chaos

Testing friendships and alliances by adding a level of underlying distrust

Made the game play different than 3rd Life – keeping things interesting

Just generally more fun

Forced players to travel out of their zone (for kills) meaning that we get more interaction and exposure to other content creators

Provided some iconic scenes like Bdubs killing Grian

Provides an opportunity for lore if the cc chooses to take it – like some due, referring to it as a curse or a red mist

Puts a time limit to the game and makes sure that the number of lives keeps decreasing

Cons/ disadvantages to the change:

More than 1 felt forceful – it amped up killings in an unnatural way

The reason behind the boogeyman felt forceful – it was just for the sake of chaos and sometimes could be harmful to storylines

Alliances couldn’t last as long and it was hard to form meaningful alliances – people generally put less trust in each other and were only around one another so long it was convenient, so we got less of the “ride or die” alliances that we saw on 3rd life

Less focus on forming friendships due to the possibility of betrayal

Roleplay felt less connected

Got stale towards the end when there are less greens/yellows

Rushed and messy kills, that were forced and might hinder the plot/roleplay

The promise of violence derailed some non-violent conflicts, which went overlooked

Unnecessary once the red players appeared

To sum up, the main arguments in favor were related to the overall feel and pace of the series – it became faster paced and more tense, more suspenseful and definitely more dramatic with all the betrayals and mistrust going around. The biggest downside of this rule is related, precisely, to the inability to form meaningful long lasting allies (minus Scott and Pearl) and the fact that it sometimes felt forced and hindered some roleplay aspects.

What I find interesting here is how double sided all these arguments are: some say that the added chaos was good while other argue that too much chaos was harmful. For example, the 6 boogeyman session was an hot topic in the comments with ones arguing that it was an overkill (ah) that just took away from the impact of killing, while others were frothing at the mouth with how amazing and unexpected everything was. Some were loving how much more fast paced LL was, while others were arguing that the pace felt forcefully fast, like the story was being pushed forward, instead of just developing naturally.

The biggest divide, however, was whether the boogeyman added or detracted from the plot. While the boogeyman curse did indeed provide us with great moments like Bdubs killing Grian, or the entire Fairy Fort – Castle alliance dismantling with BigB killing Cleo, a lot of you were unhappy about how the lack of trust stopped people from developing meaningful and long-term alliances because of the constant fear of betrayal, which greatly shifted the tone from 3rd Life to the more competitive / last man standing tone we had on last life. The rawness and ruthlessness of it all was a hit amongst some of you, but others were more unhappy due to the lack of more intricate plotlines like those in 3rd life.

I’m trying to remain impartial here, but allow me to add: it is undeniable that the boogeyman curse added something to the plot. The question here was whether it was a good addition or a bad addition. For example, for me BigB betraying Cleo and killing her massively added to the plot because it went along with the entire storyline they were building AND it felt natural and not forced. More than that, it had continuation... BigB’s action had consequences that impacted all the 4 players until the end of the game. On the other hand, a lot of the boogeyman kills felt like, in my opinion, a record scratch and a “we interrupt the plot to bing you... murder!” as in, a lot of them were things that just... happened, but didn’t add anything or moved the plot forward. And the problem is that when you have a lot of those actions that “just happen” but contribute close to nothing to the plot, on one hand it might get kind of stale and on the other hand it can actually take away from meaningful actions/kills because you’re just so desensitized to all of that.

#last life #last life smp #3rd life smp #3rd life #traffic light smp #trafficblr

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venfx · 4 years

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magnus fic roundup

as tma comes to a close, i thought i'd post some of my favorite fics to come out of this fandom. most of these are classics, listed in no particular order.

A Weather In The Flesh by @cuttoothed | 3K | S1-S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete

"There is a span of years where Jon doesn’t touch anyone other than the occasional hand shake. It’s not so bad. He’s never been someone who’s needed physical affection."

Jon has never been any good at making people want to stick around.

↳ this is such a well-done exploration of jon’s character and his relationship with touch, and i’ve re-read it at least five times. sweet and sad and phenomenally well-written.

in the chillest land and on the strangest sea by imperfectcircle, singlecrow | 20K | Safehouse, S1-S4 | Jon & Daisy, Jon/Martin | Complete

Jon remembers a statement he read years ago given by a Jesuit priest, who said that the shortest prayer he knew was, just, fuck it, as in fuck it; it's in God's hands. He takes Daisy's hand and trails on after her.

or; hope is a thing with feathers.

↳ hey, you wanna fuckin..... feel things? read this.

The Magnus Institute hires a Data Protection Officer. He sets about diligently booking in meetings, writing policy documents, and training all the staff in the importance of confidentiality. Now if only he could get hold of the Head Archivist, who seems to have vanished again...

(Jon is only trying to save the world, but apparently some people think he should still be doing his day job.)

↳ i’d be surprised to find people who haven’t read this series, but it’s the definition of “the magnus archives is a workplace comedy”. also, alasdair stuart has actually read some clips of this on Twitch, so that’s a fun bonus.

In accordance with the Ride or Die Pact of 2009, Jonathan Sims can call upon Georgie Barker at any time for aid with no strings attached. Despite their rocky history, their childhood friendship, and Jon’s barely recovered alcoholism, this pact is sacred and must be upheld.

Georgie Barker may regret this. She may regret it when she discovers that the world is full of monsters and eldritch gods and dickhead managers. She may regret it when a punk rocker who should be dead collapses on their doorstep, a teenager again who needs their help. She may regret it when her stupid ex-boyfriend starts selling his soul for knowledge and the ability to keep his new family safe.

But she probably won’t. Georgie isn’t scared of anything - not a Clown’s apocalypse, not the apocalypse that Jon is destined to begin, and not Jon’s own loss of humanity.

Maybe she should be.

↳ if you’re looking for an everyone-lives-no-one-dies-happy-ending fic that also happens to be massively chaotic, look no further.

The Reverb in These Holy Halls by @wolftraps | 98K | AU, S1-S4 | Jon/Martin | Complete

Undoing the apocalypse would have been enough for Jon, if all his people survived. Without them, Jon's only recourse is making it so it never happened in the first place. He's going to do better this time.

↳ quintessential time travel AUs. plot-wise, i feel like these can be difficult to write, but op does a fantastic job of tying things together in a way that makes sense. plus, it’s just fun to read.

jon sims v the nhs by @thoughtsbubble | 12K | Series | S3 | Complete

Joan Bright has a new patient. He's carrying an old tape recorder and is covered head to toe in scars. Jonathan Sims looks dangerous, but Dr Bright has dealt with all sorts of atypical individuals. She has no reason to be nervous.

Right?

↳ if you’ve ever thought “hey, jon should probably go to therapy”, then 1) you’re absolutely right and 2) this is... probably what would’ve happened. prior knowledge of The Bright Sessions is not required. also, apparently, this fic is written by the showrunner of The Underwood Collection? wild.

Family, Found by Dribbledscribbles | 9K | S4 | Complete

It’s Basira who catches onto it.

The collective shift that seems to come over them when heading in or out of the Institute. Not just the oppressive sensation of being observed, their every move catalogued for the voyeuristic cravings of some unseen Eye(s). That feeling remained with them even when they left the Institute these days, but it was always stronger inside its walls. That wasn’t the change. Nor was it the point.

The point was: making life worse for Jonathan Sims.

↳ i think being part of the avengers fandom circa 2012 has given me permanent found-family-trope brainrot, but you know what. jonathan sims can have a little happiness, as a treat.

n. an important moment of insight, typically one that leads to a dramatic transformation of attitude or belief

Or, in which Tim becomes an avatar for the end of all things.

↳ tim dies and then he doesn’t. there is catharsis and world building. just....read it.

Come, Change Your Ring With Me by @backofthebookshelf | 29K | S3 | Peter/Jon, Jon/Martin, Peter/Elias | Complete

The Lukases demand the Archivist marry into the family, and the Institute relies on them too much to say no. Peter is smug. Elias is fuming. Martin is suffering. Jon thinks this might be tolerable if only Peter would hurry up and leave him alone already.

OR, the soap opera we call an Archives revolves around Peter Lukas this time.

↳ superb evil-bastards-in-love content, feat. martin pining, tim being obnoxious, and jon being... well, tired, mostly. i will literally never get tired of how op writes peter.

creatures that i briefly move along by @dotsayers | 16K | Series | AU, Post-S4 | background Jon/Martin

Mr Sims was so weird, was the thing. Miss Grant always said calling people weird was rude, and Anna sort of agreed, but she didn’t know what other word to use to describe Mr Sims.

He’d only been in with the class for a few days, really, and half of that he just sat at the back listening, but that didn’t stop her from making a swift judgement. 5BG had had student teachers before, back when they were 3ST, and they’d been uniformly normal.

Mr Sims was… actually, Anna had a better adjective. He was interesting.

↳ i just.... love teacher!jon fics. this series delivers.

Once Bitten by @apatheticbutterflies | 1K | S4 | Jon & Daisy | Complete

Jon Sims has always been a jumpy kind of guy. Nervous. Twitchy. Daisy used to think it meant he was guilty. Turns out he was. Just not of what she’d thought.

Daisy learns how to peel an orange.

↳ daisy and jon’s relationship is an example of an instance where i’m happy to say “fuck what you wrote mr. jonny ‘chocolate torte of tragedy’ sims, i want them to be friends”.

pins and needles by mutterandmumble | 13K | S1-S4 | Complete

He’s got a reputation to uphold anyways; an uptight, rigid reputation that dictates the way that he interacts and functions and is such an integral part of him that he can’t let go of it anytime soon. He likes his safety nets. He likes his contingencies. He likes his privacy, and everything around this place right down to the walls seems to have ears, so he’ll stay tight-lipped up to and beyond the threat of death.

He’s good at that.

In which Jon takes up embroidery and bumbles through life the best that he can.

↳ out of all the introspective jon pieces i’ve read (and there are many), this one stands out. maybe it’s the symbolism or the characterisation, or maybe it’s the fact that i have an embroidery kit lurking in the back of my closet along with a hundred other half-pursued hyperfixations. whatever. this is excellent.

sleeping in by @ivelostmyspectacles | 5K | S2 | Jon/Tim | Complete

“Who are you trying to convince?”

Jon gives up, letting his head sag against Tim’s shoulder. “I don’t know.”

aka Elias gets tired of Jon and Tim's bickering, sends them away for a "team-building" weekend trip, and is sure to book them a room with only one bed

↳ this has everything you’d need from a “oh no there’s only one bed” fic. someone please get these men therapy.

if you try, sometimes (you get what you knead) by @ajcrawly | 3.5K | S1-S4 | Jon/Martin, Tim/Sasha | Complete

It starts with an abundance of boeuf bourguignon and ends up as a team tradition.

Food and love in uncertain times.

↳ more found family fic, this time with a diverse og!archival staff and food as a metaphor for love. hurt in all the right ways. made me hungry in the process.

#tried to keep this shortish but i might just make a part 2 #people in this fandom are crazy talented #tma #the magnus archives #tma fic recs #fic recs #long post #txt #mine

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poppyseed799 · 3 years

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Okay fellow 3rd life fans I think it’s time I come clean. I have been silent about this the entire time, thinking about staying quiet cuz it seemed the whole fandom disagrees with what I’m about to say but I will stay silent no longer.

I don’t get why people say the Desert was “clearly the bad guys”.

Let’s get this out of the way: I mainly watched Scar’s POV along with Grian’s. I watched a fair amount of Martyn’s episodes as well, a couple from Scott and then random episodes from Skizz, Cleo, Impulse, Jimmy, and probably more. Definitely plot important ones I watched from more POVs than just my main guys Scar and Grian.

I just don’t get why, when people look at all of the different factions, they look at the Desert and go “yes they are clearly in the wrong and the only ones I can easily label as the villains in the overall story” what??? Don’t even get me started on “it’s interesting that the villains won in 3rd life” what??? I always viewed them as the more innocent ones, although the story is very morally grey so it doesn’t say TOO much lmao.

So let me explain why! Well, honestly, I’m more confused as to why y’all say they’re so obviously the villains, so I’m just explaining why I’m confused here lol.

So first of all let’s get the scamming and monopolies out of the way. I have less to say about the monopoly so let’s start with that. THEY NEVER HAD A MONOPOLY… if the idea of making a monopoly is bad enough for you guys, then might I remind y’all of the cow monopoly that was attempted? Everyone was looking for ways to make business… and a SAND monopoly was CLEARLY doomed to fail!! Not to bring Dream SMP into this but if y’all are gonna say OG L’Manberg was innocent because they didn’t succeed in the potion monopoly at all then let’s have that same energy for the Sand People!!!

Now for the scams. “Oooh poppy how are you gonna defend the scamming” BECAUSE IT WASN’T SCAMMING??? Scar made it clear what he wanted and what the person would receive in return. They were told they were going to receive a piece of paper and they agreed to it! Don’t listen to Grian “don’t listen to Scar it’s a scam the papers don’t mean anything” because he was LYING. Not purposely, but he was lying. Scar NEVER said “hey Grian let’s scam people with fRiEnDsHiP” instead he always told Grian that it WAS real and that he WOULD go through with all of the papers. And he did! There were a couple of mishaps but obviously it’s really difficult to control every situation. Plus Scar had a hard time remembering all of the friendship passes lmao. But he really did try, he really did value these trades, it wasn’t scamming just because Grian thought there was no way it was worth it.

The only Scar hater I stan is Skizzleman he had all right to be mad at Scar but that doesn’t mean Scar was the enemy of the whole story lol

Now onto something that I don’t know how to start explaining but is a very big reason why I’m confused about the fandom calling the Desert the bad guys. NOBODY IN THE SMP TOOK THEM SERIOUSLY. I saw SO many posts about how “Scar and Grian seem like fun guys in THEIR POV but in others POV they’re really scary!” Like no? I always thought it was the opposite. Like watching Scar’s POV I was like “ah man they have to kill people cuz red life this is so dramatic they are feared by the server…” BUT THEN I WATCH SOMEONE ELSE’S POV AND THEY LITERALLY SAY STUFF LIKE “lol we don’t have to worry about Scar” “dang all those people just exploded. Anyways Scar is the weakest red life and we have nothing to worry about when it comes to him it’s all the other red lifers that are a problem” “lol there goes those idiots trying to make a monopoly on sand so silly” and I’m like. Oh. The entire server treats them like silly cartoon villains that never achieve anything. And yes they say these things WHILE hunting the Desert People down like what. Basically the server treating the villainous things the Desert did as not very serious made me think the same, which is why I’m so confused that people think they’re the Big Bad Guys.

ANOTHER THING relating to how the server treats the Desert: alliances!! The Desert was very loyal. Scott and Jimmy trusted the Desert, which shocked many people on the server but were they wrong? No! The Desert trusted the Hobbits back fully as well. They were the only alliance they fully trusted, but they didn’t go behind their other allies’ backs just cuz they weren’t so sure about the alliance. Sure there were comments about Impulse, but that idea was fed to them by Impulse’s allies, they had no other information. And yet they STILL gave him stuff and didn’t flinch when alone with him above Dogwarts, because even with him being suspicious he was still their ally and they are loyal as heck!!! Sure there was Impulse’s demise but like. That was endgame, everyone was looking for a reason to kill someone, and the Desert was told that Impulse was sus af and his own allies didn’t trust him so it was an easy pick. Bdubs coulda said no. And yeah Scar betrayed Bdubs in the end but like. Once again, endgame, and also it was “kill the person who stuck with you since the beginning” or “kill the person who is only on your side cuz you gave him a clock a while ago and lied to you about liking watches”. What do you expect? Plus the ending showed how loyal Scar was to Grian, the guy who owed him his first life and stuck with him till the end. Beautiful.

ANYWAYS EVEN MEMBERS OF DOGWARTS WERE LIKE “I have a hard time killing Scar because he hasn’t really wronged me personally in any way, he’s fairly reliable as well” LIKE… bro they were ENEMIES. Scar also didn’t really want to hurt them!!! Also can I just say that the only reason Scar was as bad as he was was because he was the first person to go red? Red lifers are supposed to be like the villains, so I don’t disagree with people saying that at FIRST Scar was a villain cuz he was red (although wtf were some of these guys up to using excuses to kill people while green (not talking about Grian)) but he wasn’t even that bad while he was red. He was just the worst by default since he was red lol. Which was entirely not his fault, and he only wanted to kill Ren pretty much lol. So I guess Scar being the villain depends on if you consider Ren to be the main character of the entire server.

Which is another thing I don’t get… why people see Dogwarts as the good guys. There was a CLEAR corruption arc people. Dogwarts had loyalty, but it was very ride or die, as in “if you don’t ride with us you will die”. You watch these guys call everyone (not just the desert people) “filthy peasants” and not realize they are acting like villains??? Plus the ominous “red winter is coming” like what. Not saying they weren’t good at the start, nor that they were completely and totally bad, just that if you were to frame ANYONE in this MORALLY GREY SERVER as “The Bad Guys” why not the ones that made it their entire thing????? YES they were good at first, they had regrets and cared so much about their people (just not anyone else lololol). It’s a tragic story, and you’re gonna write it off like “no even when they started doing bad things to people who never hurt them it was justified” even when they regret those things towards the end or after death so clearly it was wrong??? Guys.

I don’t want to call anyone the Bad Guys in 3rd life tho. They all did bad things, they all had valid reasons, they all had people they cared about. I just don’t get why people pick the Desert when they try to pick villains. They weren’t totally innocent but I never saw them as THE villains. For me, even while watching Martyn, that was always Dogwarts, and even then I don’t consider them Total Villains because the server is so grey! I loved them I just think that if anyone is the bad guys maybe it’s the self-imposed king that threatens to take ALL of your lives if you don’t show complete and total loyalty to them and wave their banner above your house to show it. Even if that king started out innocent and only went red to protect his friends. Once again tho I don’t like picking Bad Guys for this server. It was a very good story without having a clear right or wrong.

Just wanted to confess that, don’t really feel like arguing about it cuz I see enough people calling the Desert the Villains just scrolling thru the main tag lmao.

#3rd life smp #third life smp #3rd life spoilers #dsmp WISHES it could achieve the moral greyness 3rd life has #long post #I had more I wanted to say but I didn’t know how to fit it in I’m bad at writing rants

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