#good morning monday wallpaper

[aquaramelia]

Get into a cozy morning mood with these cute hot cup of coffee phone wallpapers! Featuring delicious cups of coffee or tea, with oil painting effects, in beautiful backgrounds with orange autumn/fall accents.

[tofics]

Nothing Like Some Neighborly Love

Part 1 - Series Masterlist

Pairing: no outbreak!Joel Miller x fem!Reader

Summary: Goodbye New York, hello Austin! - After a split from your ex, you're in dire need of a fresh scenery. Texas seems to provide just that. Your grandmother, fresh out of a hip surgery and in need of assistance, is happy to have you move in with her as a solution for both of your predicaments. Ever the hands-on person that she is, she also seems to want to rectify your fresh singleness, and she knows just the guy...

Word Count: ~4500 words

Warnings: mentions of a manipulating ex, mentions of cheating, mentions of a surgery, age gap (reader is early 30s, Joel is an unspecified amount (~10-15 years) older than her)

Your arrival in Austin, Texas is anything but spectacular. Besides your bags being some of the first to appear at baggage claim absolutely nothing out-of-the-ordinary happens - it's about as normal as a Monday-morning flight can be.

Not for you, though. Today marks the first day of your new life.

No big deal.

Except it's a huge deal. With every inch that you put between yourself and your old life in New York, you feel your shoulders relaxing a bit more and the tight-knit knot in your chest loosening.

Finally, at long last, you're free.

Free of the asshole that, up until a couple of months ago, was your boyfriend, your roommate, your co-worker.

Your lying, manipulating source of self-doubt, tears and misery.

Good fucking riddance.

"Oh honey, c'mere you!" Your grandmother pulls you into a surprisingly tight hug. For a lady who had hip surgery just two days ago, she seems to be at the top of her game.

"Gammy," you smile and return her embrace, even if not as forcefully. Strong arms or not, she did just come out of the hospital. Better to be a little more careful.

"Come in, come in! Let's get you out of that heat." Your grandma shuffles out of the door and down the hallway with the help of her rollator. You step into the house after her, dragging your two suitcases behind you.

Everything looks just like you remember. The beige carpet that flows from the hallway into the open living room and up the stairs, the brown tiles of the kitchen area, the light flowery wallpaper on the walls - as far as you can tell, not a single thing has changed. It even smells the same, like fresh laundry and soap and a faint hint of your grandmother's perfume.

You can't imagine a more comforting scenery after everything you've been through.

"How was your flight, honey? And do you want anythin' to drink?"

If it wasn't for the rollator, it'd be hard to tell that your grandmother just had a major surgery. She's already bustling about in the kitchen when you enter the open living and dining area, moving at the same speed you've always known her to. Watching your grandmother at work is like watching a busy bee, always doing something, fingers always moving. It goes without saying that your grandmother is not a woman known for sitting still or taking a break.

You already know her answer, but you have to ask anyway. "Gammy, shouldn't you be resting?"

"Restin', restin'. I hear that damn word one more time, I'm gon' have a fit!" She drops two ice cubes of frozen iced tea into each cup, then adds a lemon slice. "Doctor's said I'm s'posed to be movin'." The ice cubes clink and crackle when she pours fresh iced tea on top. "You told me to follow them orders!" Your grandma shakes the big spoon your way accusingly and you can't help but grin at the image.

"That's true, I did. I also said I'd move here to help you, grandma."

"Honey, if I can't pour no more damned iced tea, I want you to put me in my grave. Until then, I'll pour my own drinks. Now get on over here n' take those glasses over to the couch, will ya?"

You do as you're told and sit down next to your grandmother on the couch, making sure to use coasters for your drinks. Glass rings on the furniture did not go over well in this house.

"See? I can ask for help just fine." Your grandmother winks at you and then clinks her glass against yours. "Cheers, baby. Now tell me, how was your flight?"

"It was fine. Boring, uneventful. Just how I like my flights to be." A sip of your glass floods your mouth with the taste of your childhood summers, sweet and lemony and filled with your grandmother's love to the brim. There's no other iced tea quite like it.

"Good, good. And how are you doin', baby? Hm?" Her hand squeezes your thigh as her eyes roam over your face. You know the look: it's the look of scrutiny, the same one she uses any time she wants to get the truth out of someone. You've seen it being given to your mother, your father, your grandfather, even neighbors. You yourself have been at the receiving end of it a few times in your life. The result is always the same - the truth. Your grandmother is not a woman that's lied to.

"Honestly? I feel like a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders." You sigh, both for effect and because it's true. Setting foot onto Texas soil was already liberating, but sitting in your grandmother's living room has you relaxing more and more by the minute. "I'm just so glad to be here. This couldn't have come at a better moment. Not saying I'm happy you had to get hip surgery, you know, but I'm just glad it all worked out with you needing help and me needing a new place to figure out where to go from here."

You squeeze your grandma's hand on your thigh and she puts hers right on top, squeezing you back. "Oh, hush. Y'know you're welcome here anytime, and I'd much rather have you here t' help me out than some stranger comin' into my house every single day."

Despite your circumstances, you can't deny how lucky the timing of it all has been. Your relationship had been crumbling for months and it seemed like no matter what you did, all your efforts were in vein and largely not reciprocated. To make matters worse, your job was suffering under the pressure of your dissolving relationship as well. You and your boyfriend worked at the same elementary school, you being a teacher and him being the principal, and while sharing a workplace and commute had been something out of a dream come true for the first two years together, it quickly posed a problem when your first problems emerged.

The final nail in the coffin came in the form of him being the nail and the coffin being his secretary. It was so cliché that you didn't know whether to laugh or cry when you first found out. In the end, you did neither, just packed your things and left. That part was easy, with a circle of friends who offered up their couches and open ears immediately. The work part? Not so much. By now you'd say that working under your ex while another woman was actually under him was the worst part of your final months in New York.

You needed to get out. You were already out of your joined flat, the job was the next thing to go. Then your grandmother mentioned she'd need to get surgery on her hip and just hated the idea of having a stranger coming to her house every single day to help her with her day-to-day errands.

The plan basically wrote itself.

Your grandma was delighted by the idea of you moving you here. A temporary arrangement until she's all healed up and you have figured out where to go from here. It's basically a two-birds-with-one-stone situation.

After you've finished your iced tea, your grandmother insists on showing you around the house. "Gammy, come on, you really should sit down, at least a little," you try to convince her, but she's not having any of it. "I know it looks like it hasn't changed much, but I've had some things done since you were here last. Now you'll wanna know where everything is if you wanna help, right?"

You don't even bother contradicting her and she pulls herself up by the handles of her rollator with a triumphant look.

The first room you tackle is right by the entrance, opposite of the guest bathroom. It used to be your grandfather's office, but you're surprised to find it all turned around, now with a bed in the middle of it and an assortment of bedroom furniture to go with it.

"This is my new haven, at least for now." Grammy shuffles into the room and carefully plops her behind down on the raised bed. "Got help from a neighbor a street over. Nice young fella, handsome too." She shoots you a meaningful glance that you decide to ignore. "Him and his brother got some of the stuff from upstairs down here. I got this bed on loan just until I can get back into my old chambers upstairs. Doc said the stairs shouldn't be an issue, but I just wanted to make sure." A few approving pats on the mattress.

"I'm impressed, Grammy. I'd have thought you'd force yourself up the stairs every single night, no matter what. I'm glad you're cutting yourself some slack somewhere." You know your grandma appreciates your candor, but you also know how hard this situation is on her mentally. She has always been an active woman and being physically impaired can't be easy for her. You press a soft kiss to her forehead to emphasize your praise.

"Yeah yeah," she grumbles but then still squeezes your arm. "C'mon now. I wanna show you the upstairs."

The changes upstairs are less drastic, but still noticeable.

For one thing, the master bedroom is full of your grandfather's old files, various stacks piled around the room. It's a temporary set-up that you mean to sort through in your upcoming weeks here, a thank you for letting you stay and your way of chipping in, as your grandmother refuses to accept any kind of rent or payment in general for your stay.

Your own bedroom has also received a slight makeover. Previously a guest room that served as storage for when no guests were in town, the room used to be somewhat cramped, yet still cozy. You've always slept in this room and never minded the wild assortment of furniture and various gadgets, but your grandmother went all out in preparation for your visit and had all of the "junk" removed and stored in the garage downstairs. Now, on top of new furniture, the walls sport a fresh paintjob and the closet is completely empty, waiting to be filled with your own clothes and belongings.

"Grandma, you shouldn't have!," you exclaim but can't hide the excitement in your eyes as you take in your new four walls. The twin bed got exchanged for a queen, which, now that everything is stored downstairs, comfortably fits against the back wall under the window. Despite your solo-self, it comes with a nightstand on each side, matching the color of the dresser to the right and the desk tucked into the corner next to the door. Ever the prepared host, your grandma has already put a small bouquet on one of the nightstands and fresh sheets on the bed.

You spin around and bury your grandmother in a tight hug, suddenly overwhelmed by the love that clearly went into the preparation of your arrival. "You're the best," you whisper against her neck as a couple of tears spill from your eyes.

There's no place you'd rather be.

Your spend your first few days in Austin getting reacquainted with the city. As a child, you'd come here for every single summer break, so you know your way around the neighborhood well enough, but a lot has changed since you strolled around the streets in your dungarees and pigtails. Mostly it's just different shops or a new building here and there, but the neighbors have changed too. You're sad to find out that one of your favorite neighbors, an old man named George who grew the sweetest strawberries in his front yard, passed away just a couple of weeks ago. Another couple two houses down, whose daughter you used to play with on your childhood visits, has moved away to the north. The list of changes is long, but besides old George's death, there's nothing too drastic.

Just as expected (and hoped for), you have no time to dwell on your recent split. With the way the relationship went for the past years, you kind of checked out of it mentally a long time ago, but finding out about the affair still kicked you in the guts. Luckily, you're too busy to get lose yourself in a thought spiral about it, all thanks to your grandmother who is keeping you fresh on your toes.

Being the busy woman that she is, she has a whole list of errands for the week, consisting of groceries, check-ups and social calls. You keep thinking that if it wasn't for her rollator and her slower, slight wobbly walk, you'd hardly know the woman was operated on just days ago, and you're not alone. The same sentiment is expressed to you wherever the two of you go, your grandmother being a well-known and respected woman in her neighborhood.

On Saturday, just five days after your arrival, you take her to the local church. Despite not being big on faith, she has been a member of the volunteer group of the church for decades, and a cherished one at that. The moment you push her wheelchair through the door, other volunteers rush over and swarm your grandmother with questions about her well-being. Grammy makes a point of saying there's no need for the fuss, but you can tell that she's touched by the community's care for her.

The meeting discusses the idea of a block party that's been floating around for some time now, but was never realized.

"Lottie, do you even think you could handle it, being in recovery and all?," an elderly man asks directed at your grandmother. The look she shoots him in response drains some color in his face, and some other members at the table laugh. "I'm insulted you'd even ask, Frank," your grandmother replies with a hint of sourness in her voice, but then her smile grows wide and there's a mischievous spark in her eyes that puts you on high alert. You know that look. Your grandmother is up to something.

"Much as I hate to admit it though, you might be right. I'm not at the top of my game, no denying that. However, that's where my lovely granddaughter comes into play!" All eyes swivel around to you, including your grandmother's, the mischievous sparkle present as ever.

Uh oh.

"As many of you already know, my granddaughter has temporarily moved in with me to help me out during my recovery, gracious soul that she is." Gracious soul? Grammy is laying it on thick. You cock your head slightly to the side with raised eyebrows, all while maintaining a smile on your face. What are you doing? Your grandmother reads the silent question in your facial features but offers no explanation, her smile just turns more sweetly. "As a teacher, she has her fair share of experience with organizing events. Ain't that so, sweetheart?"

"I mean, I've organized two talent shows, but that was in collab-," you begin, still unsure of where this is going, but Grammy cuts you off.

"See? She's perfect. I'm sure she can fill my shoes just fine, and I'll still be there behind the scenes anyway."

Before you can utter another word, you are crowned as head of the block party planning committee. As soon as the decision is made, the group gets down to business and starts mapping out a rough draft. Besides the obvious cake buffet, whipped up and provided by members of the volunteer committee, the only other safe participant is the church's kids group, who, according to pastor William, plan to host a lemonade stand. By the end of the meeting, you have an extensive list of possible collaborators to hit up. As head of the committee, it falls in your jurisdiction to get local business on board.

"Alright, that looks like a solid list. I trust Lottie's granddaughter will do a fine job of getting lots of business on board." Pastor William smiles warmly at you and you can't help but feel like he's already forgotten your name again. Then again, he's got a big flock. Can't blame him if he doesn't remember every single sheep by name.

"And we've got Anne, Derrick and Kirsten for decorating, as well as our kids group. That just leaves the question of construction. Who's gonna supply us with stalls or booths? Any ideas, folks?"

"I'm sure Joel Miller would be happy to chip in. Him n' his brother got that construction business, remember? Sweet boys. Helped me set up my lil' hospital ward situation I got back at home," your grandma chirps up, and suddenly, you understand the mischievous twinkle in her eye.

What an elaborate and canny way to set you up. Wow.

You bite on your lip to hide the grin that threatens to spill across your face, keeping your laughter inside until after the meeting. Once you bring it up in the car back home, Grammy plays the innocent act. "I got no idea what you're talkin' about, honey. Just suggested a guy I know that does good work and has a good heart."

"Right, because especially the good heart is extremely relevant when it comes to building things," you chuckle.

"Sure it is, if it's volunteer work. And I'm tellin' you. That Joel, he's got a heart of gold."

You can sense the way your grandmother's eyes are boring into the side of your skull, but you keep your gaze focused on the road ahead of you.

Heart of gold or not, you're nowhere near ready to be dating again.

"Yeah, come on in, Lottie said you'd swing by."

It's late in the evening and his porch light hums above the two of you, casting a golden light on your silhouettes and long shadows on the ground. The fly screen creaks as Joel Miller holds it open for you. You shimmy past him with a small smile, tugging your folder of papers to your chest so they don't rub against him.

Joel's house smells like wood chips, old leather and something distinctly 'homey' that you can't quite put a finger on, but makes you feel very at ease. The scent engulfs you as you step into the house, briefly interrupted by smell of him, a mix of soap and aftershave and just the tiniest tinge of sweat.

It's an intoxicating combination.

So much so that for the briefest moment, you have the instinct to lean a step back and sniff him, but you catch yourself before you embarrass yourself.

"Kitchen's down there. Got a table and everything for your paper collection." Joel motions down the hallway with a quick and friendly wink at you. You follow his direction wordlessly and sit at the aforementioned table, feeling the tips of your ears growing slightly red.

Your grandma wasn't kidding when she said he's handsome.

You'd chalked it up to her trying to set you up, talking him up the same way elderly ladies tend to talk about men that are younger than them. 'Handsome' and 'smart-looking' are standards in that vocabulary box. You couldn't have known that this time, the description would be right on point.

"Want one?" Joel's got his head in the fridge, holding out a cold beer to you over his shoulder.

"Sure, thanks." Usually you're not so tight-lipped. In fact, you've probably talked more in the past few days than you do in a normal school week, and that's saying something. Going around town and chatting up local businesses about participating in your block party had your mouth going at a hundred miles per hour, figuratively speaking. Between speaking to people in person and confirming spots via your cell-phone, it has been a couple of very word-filled days.

And yet, now that you're with another potential 'client' you have to recruit for your endeavor, your speech well seems to have dried up.

It could have something to do with the fact that visually, Joel Miller is exactly your type. Besides his physique - tan biceps visibly stretching under a tight t-shirt that might be a size too small for him - he's got warm, brown eyes with laugh crinkles around them and a head full of salt-and-pepper hair that pairs beautifully with his scruffy-looking beard. By the looks of it, he has ten, maybe fifteen years on you.

Not really an issue for you.

Your ex, cursed be his name, was a chunk older than you too. It was just the type of man you drifted towards, the kind that's a bit ahead of you in time. In your experience, it pays off maturity wise in a way that men your age just can't compete in, even if your last boyfriend wasn't the best example.

Older men just have a grip on you you can't explain, nor deny.

"So." Joel sets the two bottles of beer down on the table, then slides onto the chair across from you. "What can I do for ya? Lottie said somethin' 'bout you guys needin' somethin' built?"

He screws the caps off of both bottles, then slides one over to you. "Cheers." Your bottles clink together and you take a few chugs, grateful for the liquid running down your dry throat. Whether that's from all your talking or a physical reaction to Joel, you don't know, and you're not sure you want to find out.

"Yeah, that's right," you finally say when you put your beer down half empty. Joel glances at your bottle with one raised eyebrow and half a grin on his lips, but doesn't say anything and instead motions for you to go on. "It's for the church's block party. The volunteer group, which my grandmother is a part of, is putting it together. It's supposed to be this come-together opportunity, get-to-know-your-neighbors kind of thing. I've been going around the past couple of days, seeing who wants to join and maybe offer a booth or a stall."

"Looks like you were quite successful with that." He nods at the wild stack of papers in front of you, post-its sticking out left and right and scribbles all over. You laugh and shuffle through the papers.

"It looks more than it is, but yeah, lots of people want to join, thankfully. Now that's where you come in." You pull out a numbered list and slide it over to him.

"This is everyone that wants to join. Problem is, we don't have enough booths for everyone."

Joel skims over the list, then whistles. "Phew. That's a bunch. How many of them you got stalls for?"

You pause long enough for Joel to look up from the list and notice you biting on your lip. "Umh. None of them?" Your grin is awkward and apologetic at the same time. Joel stares at you for a second, a dumbfounded expression on his face, then breaks out into a bellowing laughter. It's warm and deep and infectious and has the corners of your lips rising into a genuine grin.

"Oh, you're somethin'," he says breathlessly when he recovers from his laughing fit. "I can definitely see the relation to Lottie."

You shrug apologetically again and bite down on your bottom lip, the grin still lingering on your face. "What can I say? Persuasion runs strongly in this family."

"That so?" Joel leans back in his chair and puts his arms behind his head. Before you can help it, your gaze flickers across his across his arms, from his prominent biceps all the way down to where his torso meet his jeans. You look away quickly, but get the feeling Joel caught your stare by his smug grin. "I ain't said yes yet."

He does say yes. You come home giddy, excited by your success of rounding up participants for the block party and flustered from your hour at Joel's house.

It didn't take him long to officially agree, though you had no doubt that he would.

You also have no doubt that Joel Miller has been flirting with you.

There is even less doubt that you liked it.

You surprised yourself. By the time you wrapped your first meeting up, you asked for his number so you could reach him in case of changes or the like. Though the block party really was the main reason you required his number, you couldn't deny finding a little bit of joy in the idea of having his number in your phone. He had smiled all smugly too when you'd asked, his brows wiggling suggestively for just a second before he reached for the pen in your hand and scribbled his number down on one of your papers. "There you go, darlin'," he'd said, and you had to fight the urge very hard to bite your bottom lip at the mention of the endearing term.

It only occurs to you now that your grandma probably already has his number and you asking for his number could have come across as you flirting.

Oh.

"Honey, that you?," your grandma hollers out of the living room when you enter her home.

"Yeah Gammy, it's me," you call back and set your papers down on the side table near the front door.

"How'd it go?"

You tell her about your meeting with Joel in the most nonchalant way possible while you help her chop up veggies for dinner. She listens intently and is delighted that Joel has agreed to build the booths, but doesn't seem surprised by it either. Once you're finished with your summary, she gives you that inquisitorial look again.

"So?"

"So what, Gammy?"

"Don't fool me, honey. What'd you think?"

You keep your eyes focused on the carrot your peeling, determined not to meet her gaze. You just know she'd read everything in your eyes.

"Yeah, he's a nice man," you say, but she just tsks at you and swats your arm with her cooking spoon.

"You know damn well that's not what I asked."

"What do you want to hear then?"

The lack of reply makes you look up. Grammy is staring at you with an anything-but-pleased look on her face.

"What!," you exclaim defensively. Her response comes paired with another whack of her spoon. "He's a good man! You should give him a chance."

"Oh my god, Gammy. He has a kid." You groan, but pictures of Joel's biceps dance across the back of your mind.

"So? You're thirty-two, old enough to be a mom. 'Sides, I ain't tellin' you to marry the man, I'm just sayin' go out, have some fun."

"Oh well, in that case. If I'm not supposed to marry him."

You giggle and jump away when the spoon launches for you a third time, only narrowly missing you by a few inches.

Series Masterlist - Mobile Masterlist

Feedback is always appreciated! If you have any requests, feel free to send them my way. I'm always happy to practice my writing! :)

Find more entries for the hot dilf summer challenge by @hellishjoel here!

[goddessinnerglow]

Become Your Best Version Before 2025 - Day 5

Setting SMART Goals That Actually Stick

Yesterday we dug deep into our core values, and today we're going to channel that into something practical and exciting, setting goals that actually work. But not just any goals. We're talking about goals that make you jump out of bed in the morning, that align with who you really are.

You know that feeling when you set a New Year's resolution and by January 15th it's already forgotten? Yeah, we've all been there. But here's the thing, it's not your fault. The problem isn't your willpower; it's probably how the goal was set in the first place.

Let me share something that changed everything for me. A while back, I had this vague goal of "getting healthier." Sounds familiar? Weeks went by, and I felt stuck because what does "healthier" even mean? But when I changed it to "I will walk for 20 minutes every morning while listening to my favorite podcast," something clicked. Suddenly, it was clear, doable, and actually fun!

That's the magic of SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. But don't let these fancy words scare you. Think of them as your goal's best friends, making sure it succeeds.

Let's transform your dreams into reality together. Take out your journal (I know you have it nearby after yesterday!) and think about something you really want to achieve. Got it? Now, let's make it SMART:

Instead of "I want to read more," try "I will read one chapter of a book every night before bed for the next month." Instead of "I need to save money," try "I will save $100 each month by bringing lunch to work three times a week." Instead of "I should exercise more," try "I will do a 15-minute workout video every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday morning."

See how these feel more real, more doable? They give you a clear path to follow.

Here's your chance to create your own. Pick one thing you want to achieve. Now, let's break it down:

Make it Specific: What exactly do you want to do?

Make it Measurable: How will you track your progress?

Make it Achievable: Can you realistically do this?

Make it Relevant: Does this align with your values?

Make it Time-bound: When will you achieve this by?

Write down your SMART goal. Put it somewhere you'll see it every day: your mirror, your phone wallpaper, your coffee mug. Make it impossible to ignore.

But here's the secret, the part most people skip. Break that goal down into tiny, daily actions. I mean really tiny. Want to write a book? Start with writing just 100 words a day. Want to run a marathon? Begin with walking around your block.

And most importantly, celebrate these small wins! Did you write those 100 words? Do a little dance! Did you walk around the block? Text a friend and brag about it! These celebrations tell your brain, "Hey, this feels good, let's do it again!"

Keep in mind, this isn't about being perfect. It's about progress. Some days won't go as planned, and that's okay. The goal isn't your boss, it's your friend, helping you become who you want to be.

See you tomorrow for Day 6 of our journey to become our best selves before 2025!

♡ ☆:.｡ Keep glowing, babes! ♡ ☆:.｡ With love, Goddess Inner Glow.

[maccreadysbaby]

Project: Killcode

batfamily + oc insert

tw: none

wanna read more? here’s the table of contents!

want to read the first fic in the hundred days series so you understand what’s going on here? here it is!

koa is my child 🥹🫶🏻 also i finished the video game au, its here

part fifteen

❝ EXPLODING GATORADE ❞

MONDAY — JULY 23 — 8:01AM

THE DINING HALL WAS THE SINGLE LARGEST ROOM BENTLEY HAD EVER SEEN IN HIS WHOLE LIFE.

It had to be, like, two whole gymnasiums put together. The whole thing had this old, restored hardwood, the walls lined with dark wainscoting. There were iron chandeliers dangling from the ceiling that had to cost more than his internal organs, and there were at least, like, three hundred fancy wooden tables peppered across the room.

Bentley blinked. There were lots of uniformed students in there (probably, like, a few hundred), filling the room with an overlapping buzz of excited voices, moving here and there, from table to table.

Redwood Academy also had the absolute bane of his entire existence -- a food line.

Bentley hated food lines.

As soon as they entered the dining hall, Valor, who was leading the pack (and getting stared at, because apparently even metahumans weren't very used to wings.) plopped his bag down at one of the tables closest to the door.

"Man, the line is already closed," He muttered. Which had to be the single most pleasant thing Bentley had heard all morning. At this point, he'd take absolutely anything to help ease his crippling anxiety.

“We did leave over half an hour after we were supposed to,” Koa replied, putting his bag on the round table, too, with a thump. Bentley followed behind them and chose a random wooden chair — Varian ended up to his left, Bellamy to his right. Asten was straight across.

“Don’t worry, I’m here to save the day,” Varian said from Bentley’s side — he looked… not so dead anymore. Presentable, with a little actual color to his skin and life to his eyes. He pulled his red backpack off his back and unzipped it, stuck his hand in, and retracted it with a whole box of s'mores flavored pop-tarts that he tossed on the table. “Ta-da.”

Bentley almost wondered why he carried around so many pop tarts, but he guessed it was incase his blood sugar went low throughout the day. Bentley was starting to understand him a little more — if the machine said it was low, eat. If it said it was high, push buttons.

That was pretty much the extent of his knowledge. (But it was more than it had been, like, two days ago. Which was good.)

Valor grabbed the box of pop-tarts and pulled one out, passing it along to Rockie.

“Does anyone have Ms. Heidi for English first period?” Koa questioned, pulling a schedule out of his pocket that already looked crumpled and torn, like it had been through a war. “I think I might die in her class alone.”

Bentley blinked, pulling his phone out of his blazer pocket and clicking it on. (He definitely hadn’t made his schedule his lockscreen wallpaper so he didn’t have to keep up with the page… and his home screen wallpaper definitely wasn’t the map of the campus buildings…)

He hummed in acknowledgment when he scanned the teacher’s name under his first period class. “I do.”

"Thank goodness," Koa breathed, grabbing the pop-tart box as Rockie handed it to him, pulling one out and sliding it to Asten. "We can suffer together."

Bentley wasn't sure he wanted to know what that meant.

"I have math first," Rockie announced with a shudder. He had already given up on opening his pop-tarts the right way and was now just shaking the bag violently, creating a loud rustling noise that made heads from a few surrounding tables turn. "Who wants to do math at eight in the morning?"

"Literally no one," Valor replied. Rockie's pop-tart flew out of his hand and hit Koa in the side of the head, to which Koa replied by impulsively throwing his own package of pop-tarts back at him. They hit Rockie's head with a flap and fell into his lap.

Bentley stayed quiet, watching the pop-tart box move from Asten, to Varian, and then to him. There was only one pack left by the time it made it to him.

He pulled it out, set the empty box on the table, and held it out toward Bellamy.

Bellamy looked at the silver package with a few shocked blinks, then shifted his gaze to Bentley, like he half expected him to snatch it away and laugh in his face as soon as he reached for it. Bentley didn't move -- only looked back at Bellamy for a quiet moment.

Eventually, Bellamy's gaze broke away from his own, and he slowly slid it out of his fingertips.

"I have trigonometry this year. Which translates to actual living hell," Valor muttered, taking a bite out of one of his pop-tarts. "And not a soul I know is in it with me."

"Ugh -- that's rough," Varian grumbled.

There was a sudden skidding noise, and Bentley looked down just in time to catch a pack of pop-tarts that was sliding across the table to him. When he glanced up, his eyes met Asten's.

He slid them back.

Valor kept talking, but Bentley didn't hear. He was too focused on the fact that Asten had narrowed his emerald eyes into nothing more than slits and was glaring at him like he'd cut off all his hair while he was sleeping.

Asten slid them back, again.

Bentley scrunched up his face at him, but Asten kept on glaring, like he was just daring him to slide them back. He got this triumphant look on his face when Bentley reached up and peeled open the silver packaging, pulling out one of the tarts.

Then he slid the other one back to him.

Asten feigned another glare as he caught the silver package, but said nothing; and even despite all the glowering he was doing, he never slid it back.

Bentley took a small bite out of the corner of the tart, which tasted like cardboard and very fake chocolate.

"You're eating these without a toaster? Psychotic, all of you," Koa grumbled, though he, too, was opening his package. "What a bunch of weirdos."

"No one puts pop-tarts in the toaster!" Varian argued, and Koa made an exasperated sound.

"They're called pop-tarts because they pop! Out of a toaster!"

“You’re canceled,”

Bentley simply watched the exchange play out in front of him, keeping quiet. If he listened hard enough, he could hear other conversations from around the room, and if he listened harder than that, he could hear hundreds of heartbeats. He made purposefully sure not to listen that hard.

Instead, he watched the other students move about the room. They were all wearing uniforms that matched his, except the girls were wearing green and gold checkered skirts that he was pretty sure some had rolled at the top so they were purposefully shorter.

There wasn’t much personalization that could be done with their uniforms, so most students seemed to take liberties with other things, like jewelry, makeup, and hair. There were a lot more kids at Redwood with colored hair than there had been at Gotham Academy. Asten had stuck out like a sore thumb there with his blue hair, but here, he sort of fit in — just in the dining hall alone, Bentley could see heads of blue, green, red, pink, and orange peppered across the room. Some of the girls wore dainty, pretty jewelry, while others covered every available part of their faces and ears with piercings, and had their wrists completely hidden from view by bracelets. There were some girls he wasn’t even sure what their faces looked like through all their makeup — and while there had been a few of those at Gotham, there were not nearly as many as there were at Redwood.

(He did guess Redwood was in New York, though — which probably made a big difference in variety. It took a special kind of person to settle down and have kids in Gotham.)

A few more minutes passed where he simply listened to his roommates chatter about everything and nothing, continuously glancing at the time on his phone. It felt like hours of listening and staring and checking until the time flicked from 7:54am to 7:55am, and a loud bell emanated through the hall, bouncing off the walls and echoing out the doors.

Everyone moved at once -- including everyone at his table -- the already loud chatter increasing in volume. Bentley stood and gathered his things with a sigh, shoving the rest of his half eaten pop-tart in his mouth. His first class was English, which was in the Austen building, he thought, which was… somewhere outside. Among the dozens of other buildings that all looked the same.

The seven of them integrated into the crowd of students moving like a school of fish toward the doors, and Bentley made sure to keep Koa’s curly blonde hair in his view, because he seemed to know where he was going.

As they worked their way out of the building with what seemed like every other teenager in the world, all packed into the halls like sardines, Bentley felt a tug on his blazer sleeve.

When he glanced down, Bellamy had the fabric balled up in one of his hands, staying close by his side to avoid getting lost in the crowd.

Bentley let him.

—

Completely unbeknownst to Bentley, the Austen building was all the way across the entire campus. Which left him and Koa no other option but literally running to make it there on time — which most of the students were also doing, so at least they didn’t look out of place. Bentley was one-hundred percent sure they looked like they’d just survived a hurricane by the time they stumbled through the doors of the building, and he was thankful there were no teachers in the nearly-empty halls to give them dirty looks about running indoors. The place looked very similar to the dorm buildings, though the halls were swirling by so quickly Bentley didn’t have much time to look in much detail — hardwood, fancy lights, and dark wainscoting was about all he really managed to catch.

He and Koa pounded up a few flights of wooden stairs, Bentley staying right on his heels. He’d said he knew where he was going, so he was relying on him entirely — thankfully, it paid off.

They crossed the threshold of a classroom Bentley definitely wouldn’t be able to find his way back to, mere milliseconds before the late bell rang.

(He was never leaving the dorm after seven again.)

Unsurprisingly, they seemed to be the last ones there. The room was large, set up like a lecture hall with several ascending levels of tables that were all curved to face a center podium. There was almost a whole wall of windows, one of which was open to let the breeze in. There had to be at least twenty-five other students in there, chattering softly, and even when he scanned the teacher’s desk nestled into the front corner of the room, there was no teacher in sight. All eyes were immediately on them -- Bentley took to scanning for empty seats instead of looking at anyone, which rewarded him with an empty two-person table in the very back left corner of the room, on the highest level.

Koa seemed to see it, too, because he was making his way there before Bentley even got a chance to move.

He followed behind, painfully aware of all the dozens of eyes that were on him, keeping his gaze glued to the hardwood that was moving under his feet. (Of course they’d be the last ones to class on their first day, looking ridiculous because they’d just run full-speed across the entire campus. Why wouldn’t they?)

He and Koa made it to the back desk without doing anything dumb, like falling or embarrassing themselves.

Bentley took a seat in the rightmost wooden chair and hung his backpack on the back of it. He took a minute to scan the room in better detail, this time -- all the available wallspace was taken up by various posters of musicals, plays, books, and the like. The desk in the front corner was littered with little figures and knick-knacks that looked really weird and confusing. There was a bookshelf shoved against the wall in every spot there could be, full of colorful hardcovers, a giant, multicolored rug spread on the lowest level beneath the podium, and curtains varying in color on all of the windows. It was then that he noticed the tables were numbered, too -- the one he and Koa had claimed had a blue laminated paper stuck on it, with the number 14 written on in fancy calligraphy.

“Where’s the teacher?” Bentley questioned softly, glancing over at Koa and unzipping his bag. He pulled out a blue binder that he had dubbed his English binder.

Koa sighed lightly when he sat down in his chair, pulling out a small ringed notebook from his bag.  “You’ll see.”

Bentley said nothing; but, for the record, he did not enjoy the cryptic responses.

“Have you had her class before?” He continued, and Koa glanced over at him, nodding.

“Yeah, I had her last year. She’s very… eccentric,”

“What’s that mean?”

“Weird,”

Well, at least she wasn’t going to kidnap them and turn them into metahumans, Bentley thought sourly. The class continued to sit and chatter, reveling in the newfound freedom of, apparently, having no professor at all. There were two tables of girls a few rows in front of them that kept giggling and looking back, their faces flushing pink every time they stole a glance to their table. There was a table of two boys next to them, too, who kept looking at the girls, then across the room at Bentley and Koa like they were considering murder.

It didn’t take a genius to realize those girls were utterly mesmerized by Koa. (Why wouldn’t they be? He was California.)

As much as Bentley expected him to make some kind of response, he just sighed, turning to face him instead. “So… how are you liking Redwood so far?” Was what he came up with to say, though Bentley was pretty sure he was just trying to get those girls to stop being so weird about him.

Bentley shrugged, glancing down at his binder. “I mean, I like it. I like you and our roommates, but the party thing was a little… stressful.”

Koa shrugged. “I get that. Sorry, by the way. I guess we should’ve given it some thought before going and getting everyone drunk with new kids in the dorm.”

“It’s okay,” Was all Bentley said. “You don’t have to change what you do on my account.”

Koa shrugged, glancing down at his notebook. “Not just you -- I’m pretty sure Bellamy is traumatized.”

“Why?” Bentley questioned. Koa glanced back up at him with a shrug.

“He was sleeping on the couch when Valor started dragging us all back to the dorm. We were all pretty sick and out of it, woke him up. He ran to his room and I’m… pretty sure he started crying. But I’m not sure why,” Koa admitted, blinking at the table beneath his hands. “He’s… I don't know. Seems really… young. I’m not sure why they roomed him with us. I think he’s horrified of all of us except you.”

Bentley shrugged lightly. Why, of all people, did Bellamy gravitate toward him? He wasn’t like Dick, or Jason, or Bruce, or any of the people he gravitated to when he was younger.

No, he was like Tim. Tim who had anxiety, too, who thought he was a burden, who wanted the very best for everybody but himself. Tim who dealt with the same things Bentley dealt with, who knew what to do because he’d been through it, too. 

Was that why Bellamy…?

“Do you think he’d be more comfortable with kids his age?” Bentley questioned, glancing down at his binder, then back up at Koa.

Koa shrugged, repeatedly flicking the pages of his notebook. “I’m not sure he’d be comfortable anywhere. Feeling safe at this school is a process for everyone, since pretty much none of us have pleasant backgrounds.”

Bentley hummed in agreement, quietly noting the fact that Koa had basically admitted to not having a pleasant background, tabling that fact in the back of his mind. He didn’t know much about Koa, really, other than the fact that he was from California and lived with a really young guy who took care of him. He wondered where he came from.

Suddenly, a crumpled up piece of letter paper hit Koa in the back of the head with a quiet thwack, bouncing down onto their table. Bentley blinked, glancing across the room to see who it’d come from -- the four girls were now quieter, facing forward, and the two boys were watching them like hawks with these mischievous looks on their faces.

Koa rolled his eyes, grabbing the paper and unraveling it. Bentley could see words and a drawing faintly from the underside, but he couldn’t quite make it out. So he paid attention to his expression instead, watching carefully as Koa scanned the words, seeming mostly unbothered -- but his eyes widened slightly when they flicked down to the drawing. He kept his expression closely bridled, probably to not give the other boys the satisfaction they wanted, but Bentley was in-tune enough with the subtleties of people's mannerisms (thanks to his father.) that he didn’t miss the quiet inhale Koa sucked in upon first glance at the doodle, the way his eyebrows pitched inward the slightest bit. Bentley heard those other boys laughing and muttering from across the room.

Koa crumbled up the paper again and shoved it in his blazer pocket, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. He didn’t say anything else. He didn’t look at anyone, either.

Bentley glanced over at the pair of boys, who were chuckling and laughing amongst themselves. The left one, one with black hair and dead, brown eyes, turned back toward Koa and made a sad face where he puckered his bottom lip out. Then he laughed with his friend and reached into his bag, withdrawing a bottle of red Gatorade. 

So Bentley just sat there, looking awfully innocent as the drink all but exploded in his face with a pop. Red liquid went everywhere -- up his nose, in his hair, all over his uniform and the table and his friend. The girls next to them burst into laughter, as did most of the other students around the room.

Koa blinked a few times, then glanced over at Bentley, who looked back at him and shrugged lightly.

A small smile tugged on the corners of Koa’s lips, and Bentley watched the boy rise from his desk, wiping his red-coated face with the also-soaked sleeves of his blazer. “What the hell, McClaine?!”

Koa shrugged innocently. “You know what my powers are -- I didn’t do a thing.”

Apparently, Bentley either looked too innocent and harmless, or the mean guy didn’t want to waste time on him -- because he marched out of the classroom, closely followed by his friend, and left all the other students catching their breath from laughter. 

Koa glanced over at him, smiling lightly. “Thanks,” He whispered, though it still had sort of a sad sound to it, if he listened hard enough.

Bentley smiled faintly back at him. “You’re welcome.”

--

tag list! (If you want me to remove or add you, ask in comments!)

@fleur-alise @sarcopterygiian @flyrobinflyy @gayboss-too-close-to-the-sun

@xiaonothere @skylathescholarly @beatyoutothatusernameloser

[elenadoeslife]

Monday, July 1st 2024 - day 1

This morning I did my first weigh-in. I plan on checking my weight once a month, depending on when I'm staying with my parents (I don't own a scale for mental health reasons, so I can only check my weight here);

I ordered a tester pack for some new vitamins. Before I used gastric bypass vitamins, but now they offer vitamins specifically for the mini gastric bypass;

I made a grocery list for this week's food prep;

I decided to quit smoking. Mostly because it's just way too expensive and I want to save up money for our new place, but since it'll also be good for my physical health, I figured I'd add it to this list. Smoking the last one as we type;

I tried making a cold brew protein coffee (lactose free milk, refrigerated coffee and a quarter of a scoop of vanilla protein powder) and it actually tastes pretty good;

I picked up some high protein pudding while I was getting groceries for my mom. I've wanted to try this brand for ages, so I bought 2 flavors. Already tasted one (chocolate) and it was great;

I was supposed to eat pizza for dinner, but I'm gonna have a whole wheat bun with a boiled egg and cheese instead - progress;

This evening I'm having coffee with my cousin, aunt & mom for my cousin's birthday tomorrow. Afterwards I'm taking the train back home;

I made a cute lil' wallpaper from a picture that I took last week. Added a quote for the ~vibes~.

[jesytr]

it was previously the moment of getting hired into Arkham Asylum when Harleen believed maybe she didn't want to be a part of the team. they gave her clients as a psychiatrist, and she ran with each of them. carefully pulling back the layers of childhood trauma, and the corporate justice system that seemed to make more, and more money for the state petitionary.

each inmate ranged from criminally insane to a more stable, and manageable clientele. though each seemed to almost lack in what she was looking for. what she wanted to find in someone. it wasn't easy to express her boredom for it all. going through the motions felt like a daily chore. she remembered when she had been told that she should've worked at a different hospital, and it was starting to feel like she should... then she found @jokethur was put into the system. and her curiosity led her straight to her boss. in which she asked to be assigned his case.

it wasn't so cut and dry, but she did manage to get on his team. which seemed extensive enough for her to be accepted as his main therapist. treatment beginning every Monday, and Fridays. enough to keep her guessing. ' how did a guy like that end up in here ? '

" well , " her freshly dyed blonde hair sat up in a ponytail and on her nose was her typical set of glasses. she had trained herself in the mirror that morning down to the last detail of how she was going to reintroduce herself to arthur. she would extend out her hand, and say, ' nice ta' meet cha' again, ol' pal - how'd ya' end up in the slammer ? ' but no. not like that. instead maybe she'd try, ' looks like we're both in here now! therapy buddies ?? ' instead she ended up clearing her throat when she was finally in the same room as him. standing in front of Arthur from her desk. after they brought him to her office. she dismissed the guards , and smiled, " ya' can sit there. " swooping her arms out to the couch in the room.

she picked up a clipboard and sat back down without waiting for him to do so himself. glancing through the papers that had personal information on him, " I uhh --- wasn't expecting ta' see ya'. " not like this anyways, " come ta' my surprise ta' find ya' here. " she cleared her throat again. eyeing the clock behind him set in her office just near the door, " first session - ya' got an hour. " she knew she had to be professional. especially since all sessions would be recorded for the board of directors to look over.

her office wasn't especially fancy or anything for the most part it had a teal wallpaper to it and some feel good uplifting posters such as a cat hanging on a branch saying ' hang in there! ' and a little kid holding a red balloon, along with a ' live. laugh. love ' that she personally picked out. she had a small desktop with a mug with a clown on it with a droopy frown, but bright red hair. she also had a laptop to keep notes on throughout the session. she picked up her pink pen, and began to write down the time , the date, as well as any noticing quirks she could pick up on right away about him.

[the-fiction-witch]

Seventeen P31 - 39

Media TMR AU X Seventeen Series

Character Newt

Couple Newt X Reader

Rating Sweet + Flirty af

I smiled so wide my cheeks hurt, I didn't even care how little sleep I had gotten. I smiled and pulled my pillow even tighter wrapping my legs around the pillow too peppering the soft cotton with kisses.

"Good morning y/n" I smiled squeezing the pillow even tighter "ummm did you sleep well? Yeah? Hummmm" I smirked biting my lip "Yeah? You wanna snuggle? No? Ohhh you wanna make love? Hummm well who am I to deny my darling her desires" I smirked squeezing and kissing my pillow and grinding against it playfully

"Isaac sweetheart you want fruit loops or cinnamon toast for breakfast?" My mum said as she opened the door to my room

"Mum!" I yelled moving the pillow away and grabbing my covers to conceal my erection though as it was pretty obvious through my boxers

"Ohh goodness-" she gasps shutting the door again "Oliver! I think you need to have another one of those... chats with your son" she yelled

"What are you going on about Alice?" My dad yelled back from their bedroom

"Ughh! Mum means Newts Wanking again!" Sonya yelled from her own room

"Again? I think he needs to skip the cereal love, it's increasing the libido and production far too much"

"Privacy. In this house. Can I have some please!" I yelled

"You get privacy when you're eighteen" my mum warns hitting my door "Now leave that pillow alone and come down for breakfast"

I sighed and got out of bed getting some fresh clothes on even if I had to give myself a decent adjustment given I was still very hard but I slipped my orange and black button-down on as an overshirt I heard a noise.

Buzz buzz

My phone!

I bolted over grabbed it from its charger and opened it up to see the most wonderful of notifications from the name I put in yesterday

Y/n <;3:

Morning Newt x hope you had a nice night just got to the gym with the girls

So I happily texted her back

Newt:

Morning love X yeah I hope you had a good night too :) you have fun with the girls at the gym, don't work yourself too hard

Y/n <;3:

You're are so sweet x but that's really up to Teresa she makes the plans for everyone I will work as hard as she tells me to

Newt:

Oh, well if she does push you a little too hard maybe I can treat you to another slushie on Monday xx

Y/n <;3:

I'll hold you to that &lt;3

Ummmmm y/n my darling, I put my phone in my pocket and headed down to the kitchen where everyone else sat having breakfast there was silence at the table as I poured some cereal and milk having a couple of spoonfuls before my dad broke the silence.

"Okay. We need a chat"

"Newts in trouble" Sonya laughed

"Dad I wasn't wanking. I was just in bed that's all"

"No no this isn't about that." He says folding his Sunday paper and setting r down beside his coffee "I am sick to death of the name calling, arguments, bickering, complaining, tadletailing, the fights for the bathroom every morning, the constant complaints about space and privacy. I have had it. And you kids can't seem to be mature adults and put it aside so after much long debate your mother and I have come up with a solution." He explained

I merely chewed my cereal sheepishly

"We are clearing out the basement"

For a moment there was a stunned silence and a mild wave of confusion as too if that's what he meant to say and then how that sentence connects to the first.

"Okay... as a bonding exercise?" Sonya asks clearly as confused as me

"Well to some extent," he shrugs

"No we are going to clean out the basement and one of you will be moving down there"

"Into the basement!" Sonya yelled

"Yes, it's a very large room bigger than both your bedrooms, with its own bathroom"

"Yeah and probably a million spiders!" Sonya complained

"I take it you don't want the basement?"

"No!"

"Newt do you have any issues with the basement?"

"...can I do anything I want with it? Furniture? Wallpaper? Can I mount my own TV?"

"You can do whatever you want provided you don't disturb the water heater"

"I'll take it!"

"And what about me?"

"And once Newts emptied his room... well call a contractor. Put an arch in that wall"

"So I get my room and Newt's room!"

"Yes, is this agreeable?"

"Yes!" We both jumped

"But you two have to get it cleaned out"

"Will you take me shopping? To furnish my new basement?"

"Yes but you keep your bed and you keep to a budget"

"Deal!" 

As soon as I finished with breakfast I bolted to the basement door and down the stone stairs clicking the light on to show off the room better.

The large room with grey walls and floor, a bunch of boxes stacked around the place with various household junk, the old sofa from the living room, a small bathroom under the stairs with a shower and bath, toilet and small sink but no door, the water heater in the back corner two small windows to the outside garden, and one light bulb on a old wire. Immediately I sat on the stairs and began to plan my first job to remove all the boxes of stuff. So I started on those closest to the stairs most of it either needed to be tossed or to be put in the attic with other seasonal and memory stuff

"Hey" sonya says as she came down and began to help

"Your helping me?"

"I want your room, I'm gonna use it as a walk in wardrobe. The quicker this gets done the quicker I get my huge room"

"Fine, and I don't have to deal with fighting you for the shower anymore. And I get my cool basement room"

"Whatever" she said as we got on with the slow work but we made good progress finishing the last few boxes by lunch "where's your phone?" She asks as she dug thought a box

"On the sofa," I answered absentmindedly as I looked through a box. It was mostly old family pictures and things, weddings, parties, grandparents and such but I spotted one that for a moment gave me pause.

It was a fairly aged photo with speckled white grain the corners slightly folded and rubbed, for a moment I thought it was me but that would have been stupid.

It was dad.

Sat on the same bleachers that still sat on the track field at school, brown trousers higher then they likely should have been, a white button down with a orange and brown striped knit sweater vest, his face so much like mine I finally get why so much of our family compares me to him the only real difference the thick black frames and darker hair as both Sonya and i's blonde class far more from our mother. But in one hand were some books and the other around a young girl in a flag girl uniform with blonde hair up in a bun.

It's strange I suppose to see my parents like ... people. To remember they had a whole life before they became my parents.

I put it away in the box and picked it up taking it to the top of the stairs for dad to decide what to do with

"Here" Sonya says as she handed me back my phone a she delt with another box

"Thanks what did you want It for anyway? Check the time?"

"My phone's upstairs" she shurgs "and I found his cute, adorable picture that I just had to share"

"-What - what picture?" I stuttered

"This one, I figured y/n would love to see it. Aren't you just so cute? In your little bath with your ducky. You can even see your little butt" she smiled showing me a photo album that did indeed have a photo of me.

I couldn't have been any older then a year old maybe less laid on my stomach butt naked in a bubble bath with my old duck plushie

"Bye newt!" She giggled taking her box and scampering upstairs before I could chase after her

I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die. 

Buzz Buzz

Oh dear god please tell me that's not y/n. Please tells me that's just tommy asking about the science homework.

I was almost too scared to look but I knew I had to I forced myself to look and saw it was y/n so quickly opened her message seeing she had seen the phone and has responded

Y/n <;3:

Awwww, newt I didn't know you had a baby brother

Ohh she doesn't think it's me! Okay I can work with that I can fake having a baby brother... can I? I mean it can't be that hard right. I highly doubt my parents are going to be thrilled about me faking having a baby brother, I don't know how well I'd be able to keep that up. And I really like y/n do I want to start our relationship on lies?

Newt:

No, no I don't. we're cleaning out the basement. Sonya thought it would be funny send you that old picture of me I'm really sorry about that.

Y/n <;3:

I thought that might have been the case,

You were a very cute little baby newt X

Don't worry about it I thought it was sweet have fun clearing out x

And then she sent a picture of her in little blue shorts, some trainers, a loose fitting top and sports bra her hair up tightly her headphones in clearly on the treadmill at the gym

Newt:

Thanks X awww you look really cute too x

Have fun at the gym.

I smiled putting my phone away and cleaning up sweeping, moping, dusting, cleaning the years worth of dust from the bathroom dumping loads of chemicals down the drains, letting all the taps run and such as the bathroom has pretty much been inaccessible for a good couple of years. All while thinking to myself what I was going to do with the place.

"Oohh lovely, you've done a good job. Now DIY store closes at four shall we get going?" My dad says as he heads down

"Ohh yeah absolutely" I smiled grabbing a pad and pen from my room and getting into the car with him starting on my list as we drove

"Planning?"

"Yeah"

"I'm sure you'll add your personal touches"

"What's my budget?"

"Let's say three hundred bucks today. That's the usual price for the work needed to turn your old room into an extension of Sonyas anymore we'll sort accordingly so it's fair"

"Thanks for this dad"

"It's fine. Sick of the bathroom fights. Plus that room was getting small for you anyway, especially after you finish school"

"True."

"And... give you and this little lady some privacy"

"She's not my girlfriend dad. Atleast not yet"

"Do you want her to be?"

"Very much"

"Then you'll need the privacy." He says as we parked up.

My dad and I headed through the store, luckily there weren't many people around My dad had the pallet cart as we went around grabbing various things I wanted for my basement room. grabbing some towels, a bathroom shelf for in the shower, a little set for soap, my toothbrush and such, a nice mirror with some lights on, a few nice pillows and a cover for the sofa, a little shelf unit for my collections, a little coffee table, a little wooden unit for my tv stuff, some little curtains for the small windows, a new fitting for the one light, and a couple of other homewear stuff to personalize the place not too much given pretty much everything from my bedroom is coming down with me, and my dad grabbed some stuff and the card for a contractor to come and open up the wall between me and Sonya's rooms. 

"You done?"

"I think so," 

"You'll have to remember to add your bathroom utility bits to the weekly shopping list"

"I will do" I smiled 

"You sure you don't wanna ... grab a little container?" He asks offering a little wicker container from the side 

"Uhh what for?"

"For in your bathroom," 

".... Okay"

"For lady items," he said "Ladies appreciate when boys have stuff for them makes them feel supported"

"Good point" I nodded adding it to the cart 

"When do we get to meet this y/n anyway?"

"I don't know, we're not like dating or anything Dad"

"But you texting?"

"Yeah"

"and walking each other home"

"Yeah"

"Have there been kisses?"

"....Maybe" I blushed "Little kisses, cheek kisses is all"

"I'm sure we'll be seeing her soon then" he chuckled as we headed to the check-out "How about when we get home we throw everything down into the basement and move all your stuff down there then we can just leave you to your design work" 

"Sounds good" I nodded helping as we scanned everything and dad paid so I happily helped excitedly heading out to the car 

"You excited?"

"Of course, I weirdly like interior design"

"What are you most excited about?"

"Uhhhhh.... hummm"

"putting your Tv on the wall?"

"Kinda, I think I'm most excited for my little self unit I can finally property display stuff" 

"Alright lets get your butt home then so you can get working" 

As soon as we got home we moved My stuff downstairs box after box and eventually my furniture too meerly leaving it in the basement.

"Right you have everything you need, call you for dinner"

"Thanks dad" I smiled before he headed up and out the basement or well my room now.

I put on some music and got to work moving furniture and generally sorting the place out which took a good while until At Last collapsing on my bed. And looking at the place.

The large gray basement with the staircase up to the house in the bottom left corner with the bathroom under the stairs, the bottom wall now had my little TV and game stuff set up with the sofa pushed close with a rug and the small coffee table, the water heater in the back corner, my desk with my computer setup at the side along with the shelf where I had set up all my snow globes and other little accumulations, as well as my wardrobe and chest of draws with the wardrobe in the top right corner, the curtains on the little windows and my bed against the wall with my beside table. Of course I still had some stuff to do like the light and a few things I'd need to buy online but I was so happy having a nice private space.

Buzz buzz

I quickly grabbed my phone and smiled as I saw her text

Y/n <;3:

Hey x all done at the gym How'd it go with the basement?

Newt:

Whoa you were there a long time, all good now it's my bedroom

Y/n <;3:

Wow! I bet it looks great

Newt:

I can send a pic if you wanna see?

Y/n <;3:

It's okay I can wait, I'd rather see it in person xx

Newt:

Well you'd more then welcome maybe one night your free you could come over? I could show you the basement and we could run lines?

Y/n <;3:

I'd love to newt x

Just maybe... call it your bedroom, not gonna lie I think it's gonna scare some ladies away if you invite them to 'Come over and spend the night in your basement'

Newt:

Yeah good point x

"Newt! Dinner!' My mum yells

"Coming!" I called back

Newt:

Sorry dinner, got to go

Y/n <;3:

Me too maybe we can chat again later x

Newt:

I'd like that love X 

I got up with my alarm and yawned as I rubbed my eyes pushing back the covers and climbing out the bed

"Ahhh cold floor!" I whined as met feet touched the ice-cold floor so I scampered to the rug "note to self by another rug" I nodded I put my music on and headed to the bathroom to brush my teeth while the shower heated up checking my phone as I did

Y/n &lt;3

Good morning x

Ummm my little y/n, she such a sweetheart.

Newt:

Good morning love X sleep okay?

Y/n &lt;3

Unfortunately not

Newt:

No? What's up?

Y/n &lt;3

I think I'm getting Ill that's all

Newt:

Ohh you poor thing, I did say not to overwork yourself at the gym yesterday. Don't push yourself too hard today okay

Y/n &lt;3

I'll do my best

I set my phone down and jumped in the shower scrubbing myself nice and clean before climbing out with my towel and relaxing on the sofa as I got dry, soon enough I picked out my clothes for the day and for dressed into my jaded grey jeans, and grey shirt, loose fitting dark green and red button down rolling my sleeves up and fixing my hair before I grabbed my stuff and headed up to breakfast

"Morning"

"Morning basement boy" Sonya laughed

"I think it's cool, it's like I've got my own little apartment down there" I laughed grabbing some breakfast

"Lunch" my mum smiled handing the bag over

"Thanks mum" I smiled taking it and stuffing it in my bag

"Why are you back to pack lunches again? You miss lunchables?" Dad asked

"I mean kinda. But I've got drama rehearsals at lunch and scholastic after school so haven't really got alot of time"

"Alright have fun" mum smiled

"Will do" I smiled giving them both a hug before headed out to the porch waiting under the stoop to hide from the rain as I put in my headphones Sonya came out not long after and ignored me as usual heading down the street alone so I went on with my music. I got on the bus as soon as it arrived and kept checking my phone incase she messaged I wanted to texted her but I didn't want to seem... needy. Once we got to school I went to my locker as usual doing the shift around I often do on Monday making sure everything is where I need it for the week.

"Morning" Thomas smiled as he arrived at his own locker

"Hey Tommy"

"So... physics"

"Your on your own Tommy"

"What!"

"I did have time"

"Ohh what you been texting y/n all weekend?"

"How do you -"

"Newt, just accept anytime I know anything about you and y/n that you didn't tell me. Teresa told me" 

"What do you and Teresa talk about other than me and y/n?" 

"The State of the Economy" 

"Really?"

"Yeah,"

"You.... you have a weird relationship, Tommy"

"At least I'm in a relationship,"

"I'm making progress, we send little kisses now"

"I've heard,"

"But I've been doing a lot of stuff I've moved rooms now so I had a busy weekend"

"Moved rooms?"

"I live in the basement now"

"Like a weird uncle?"

"No! Like a cool hip teen"

"Like a weird uncle" He nods

"It's cool! I have a sofa, and I'm thinking of buying a projector"

"Okay projector movie nights in a basement does sound cool, we should set up a movie night and get some pizza and popcorn"

"We should. But I have no physics help so we're all alone. I've also done so studying so... I may be a bit fucked"

"Yeah, you are definitely fucked" 

I sighed putting my stuff in my locker and grabbing my lunch 

"How bad did that go for you?" Thomas asked

"Uhhhh... Bad" I sighed "But it's over, Come on we have rehearsals"

"You excited to see your girlfriend?" he joked

"You excited to see Your girlfriend?" I glared back

"Course, I'm dating the head cheerleader I'm always excited to see her" He laughed as we headed through to the drama room and I found myself a seat as he met with Teresa,

"Hi Newt" I heard behind me so I turned and smiled as I saw her

"Hi y/n" I smiled seeing her as she came over and sat on the chair beside me, she had little black sneakers today, light blue leggings, a little black denim skirt, and a little blue fluffy jumper with the sleeves pulled down to her hands so she could ball them up, very little makeup on her face so much even I noticed she had more makeup on in her pic at the gym then she did today, her hair pulled back into a sleek ponytail with a little blue scrunchie "You okay?"

"Yeah, Just not really feeling that great today"

"Ohh you poor thing, you don't look so good. I mean you look nice obviously but -"

"Thank you newt, but it's okay I know I'm not my usual cute cheerleader today"

"Well I still think you look very nice"

"Thank you" she smiled 

"Right kids I hope you've all been reading your scripts as we begin blocking" Miss Mary began "Nowhere better to begin than the beginning let go" she said 

So everyone for the opening scene got up with their scrips 

"Are you going to be okay?" I asked her

"I should be" She smiled taking her script and heading up with everyone else 

I wasn't needed for the first number so I got comfy keeping my script so I could keep track of where we were while I had my lunch often meeting y/n's eyes she was clearly nervous and not doing so well but I made sure to give her a smile which often made her smile a little

"Alright let's run it through from the top scripts in hand"

"September 1st 1989, Dear Diary..." She began 

We didn't even get to me needing to rehearse today but we made good progress on the opening number even if we overran a little meaning everyone was late to our next classes having to rush off quickly. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful so I headed to scholastic sitting and doing as little work as usual given we didn't need to do much. Miyoko pretty much had all of this in the bag and the rest of us merely used the room to sit down and snack on what I hadn't eaten from lunch.

"Alright kids, get off now before the track practice lets out and blocks the car park up" Jorge told us as we finished the last practice question 

I didn't waste any time as dark clouds were looming and it would likely rain before I got home so I got my stuff and scampered through the school, and out to the car park and once again I found myself stopped by the light of the track field. 

I should really get home I'll get soaked if I don't... 

But I do wanna check in on y/n she if she's still okay. 

So I headed into the track field seeing the cheerleaders doing a routine but y/n wasn't with them? I saw her with her back up in the bleachers with her script so I headed up and sat beside her 

"Hi Y/n"

"Ohh Hi newt" she smiled putting her script back in her bag 

"What are you doing up here?"

"Teresa said it would be best I stay up here today"

"Awww, because you're not feeling well?" I asked and she nodded sadly 

"And I didn't wanna anything happen to my uniform, it stains I have to buy a new one," she says shuffling her feet 

"Ohh,"

"I miss my uniform"

"Yeah you look really cute in your uniform, but I still think you look really nice. I actually kinda like this outfit better" 

"Really?"

"yeah, I mean of course you look good as a cheerleader. But I really think you look cute like this it's less cheerleader more... you. You don't blend into the back of the cheer squad like this" 

"I thought everyone loved the cheerleaders"

"Everyone does, and if you like your cheer uniform you should wear it but if you want to wear some other outfits somedays, I think it makes you look really pretty"

"Thank you newt" she smiled 

"Are you feeling okay? I've been kinda worried about you all day"

"That's sweet, I'll be okay," She says "I'm pretty used to it" she smiled 

"Can I ask what is wrong? you don't have to tell me if you don't want to"

"It's okay newt it's just that time of the month"

"Ohh." I nodded "Uhh here" I said grabbing my bag and having a dig around for a moment "Did you want some painkillers? I've been packing them every day since the incident with Ben"   

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not, you're in more pain than I am" I happily handed them over to her and she quickly took one 

"Thank you newt, that's very sweet" she smiled moving to lean her head on my shoulder wrapping her hands around my arm 

"You're welcome, whatever I can do to help," I told her putting the packet away in my bag 

"Is that a chocolate bar?" She perked up a little as she spotted the last part of my lunch a small Milky Way chocolate bar 

"Ohh yeah guess I didn't eat it at lunch"

"... Could I be cheeky?"

"Depends?"

"Could I have it?"

"You want my chocolate?"

"Ummmm" she nods "I'll trade you a fruit roll-up?" 

"Don't worry about it" I smiled handing over the Milky Way, 

"Nooo I feel bad-"

"Don't worry about it, really love"

"Are you sure? I feel bad just taking it and not giving you anything for it"

"It's okay, I know chocolate helps so you can have it" 

"You're too sweet" she smiled nuzzling a little closer

"Well, I don't like to see you in pain," I told her 

"newt?"

"Yeah?" I asked turning a little to look down at her as she nuzzled on my shoulder she smiled up at me and moved closer giving my lips a soft little kiss barely even a second, her lips so sweet and soft with a gentle cherry sent, before she pulled back and nuzzled herself into my neck and tightened her arms around my arm 

"Thank you Newtie" She smiled 

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhh" was all that arrived in my mouth "You uhh you're welcome" I blushed hard trying not to faint but I smiled widely and held her arm gently and leant my head on hers too. 

as much as I utterly adored our little cuddle the clouds only grew darker so I spoke up,

"Hey? If you're not actually cheering we could start the walk home? try and beat this rain?"

"They don't like me to leave early"

"They won't notice, I won't tell I promise" 

"I would, but my dad's picking me up tonight"

"Ohh okay sorry"

"No, it's okay, if you like I can get him to drop you off at home so you don't have to walk"

"You don't have to"

"No no, it's no trouble" she smiled 

We watched the track guys practice and her cheer girls run through routines often getting closer and every so often sharing a little kiss I felt so utterly happy so peaceful like I just wanted to squeeze her in my arms and fall asleep but I was right and when the rain came it came with a score to settle. The rest of practice was cut off as the track got rained out in minutes, the car park drain overflowing and flooding the car park with a good few inches of water luckily we hid under the bleachers waiting as many got in their cars and scampered 

"There he is!" she says spotting her dad's car pulling in almost having to shout over the sound of the rain. I followed her kinda nervous as we went over to the tall car and she tapped on the driver's window, It vrred as the window rolled down revealing her father. 

He was a wide man in a green button-down shirt, his face sharp and intense with a scowl across his face as he looked over at us his hands on the wheel in a tight grip his hands scared. 

I gulped rather afraid. 

"Hi daddy, Would it be okay if we took my friend home? so he doesn't have to walk in the rain?"

There was silence for a moment he looked at me and then back to her all while we stood getting soaked 

"Please daddy," she asks sweetly 

He gruffly nodded "Boy in the front" he demanded 

"Thank you" she smiled opening the door to climb into the back 

"thank you sir" I nodded going around and climbing into the passenger seat once we were sorted he started the car up and headed off the rain didn't easy battering the car the wipers on their fastest speed to try and keep the window clear, I did my best not to drip or get dirt on the car or make eye contact with her father 

"Name?" he asks me 

"Ohh uhh Isaac, Sir." I explained

"shhh" he warns making me gulp again "She's asleep"

I looked into the back and y/n had fallen asleep in the backseat 

"she always falls asleep in the rain, and she's not well anyway"

"Yeah, I gave her some painkillers I don't think that helped" I nodded 

"Isaac you said?"

"Yeah, everyone just calls me Newt though"

"Ahh" He nods "So you're newt."

I was stunned for a moment "You've heard about me?"

"I haven't stopped bloody hearing about you in months" 

"I uhh I didn't know that" I blushed 

"Good of you, taking care of her today and all"

"It's okay, I was more than happy too."

"Good, She's mentioned she'd like for you to come to dinner one evening, that something you agree with?"

"Yeah absolutely I'd love too. And I'd love to have her over too one evening"

"I'm not going to pry, I don't wanna know." he says "But Whatever you are... Look after her for me. She means a lot to me."

"I will do sir" I nodded "She means a lot to me too" I smiled "Did you need me to-" I began 

"I know where you live" he says, "she told me."

"Ahh alright then" I nodded and soon enough we arrived at my house "Thanks for the lift"

"Don't worry about it," he says 

"Is she still asleep? I don't wanna wake her"

"I'll be the bad guy" he chuckled "So you don't have to" he laughs "Y/n!" 

"Hummm?"

"You were asleep hun"

"I wasn't sleeping" she yawns "I was just resting my eyes" she says clearly having been asleep "Ohh is it time to go?"

"Yeah, thanks for the ride through"

"It's okay, I'll see you tomorrow?" she says moving closer to the front seats

"Of course, I'll see you tomorrow." 

"Okay, Bye" she smiled 

"Bye" I smiled back I wanted to give her one more kiss but given her dad was right there I knew that likely wasn't the best idea for my continued... being aliveness. But she smiled and gave my lips a sweet little kiss just like on the bleachers 

"Bye newt"

"Bye love" I smiled trying not to blush to hard grabbing my stuff and quickly getting out the car giving them both a wave as I headed inside away from the rain and the car drove off as I shut the door and raced past the kitchen 

"Dinner will be done in a bit Isaac" My mum shouts as I went past

"Okay call me when its done" I smiled bolting down to my basement room dumping my bag and jumping on my bed hugging my pillow tightly over my face as I screamed with joy an excitement! 

[kitekki-khaos]

GOOD MORNING LITTER HOUSE, IT'S SCHEDULE TIME!!

Par for the course this week, now that the phone wallpapers are done we'll be moving onto the next project on the to do list for this Wednesday, whatever that ends up being by then. Then Code Vein on Friday, which we'll just be continuing where we were during off-stream play. Then more Planet Crafter on Saturday!

Additionally, we have the Khaos Litter House Community set up now! I'll be double-posting schedules/art/updates there so if you want to make sure you see everything, go join it!

Schedule Monday: [Offline Work] Tuesday: [Offline Work] Wednesday on Twitch: Work/Art Stream at 9PM PST / 12AM EST Thursday: [Offline Work] Friday on Twitch: Code Vein at 9PM PST / 12AM EST Saturday on Twitch: Planet Crafter at 9PM PST / 12AM EST Sunday: [In the Void]

Links: Twitch: Kitekki YouTube: Kitekki VOD Archive: KitekkiVODs Everything: Carrd

Channel Tags: General Tag: #KittenLitter Art Tag: #Tekillust Fashion Tag: #TekiWear NSFW Tag: #NSFKitten

[gaymasonjar]

Will You Meet Me In The Middle?

Preview of Chapter 7: Sanctuary

 It was late in the morning when they crossed the border to their home state. Bags packed into the back of the truck and a small cooler up front with snacks for the road. It had taken them two days between stopping at gas stations and switching up who drove. Monday morning light was shining on them as they crossed through New Mexico. They were less than an hour out from the city limits of Roswell.

 The radio was blasting music that Alex was humming along to. His eyes were focused on the passing landscape, the wind blowing his hair around since the windows were rolled down. Michael had his left hand wrapped around Alex’s thigh as he drove.

 Alex’s phone buzzed in his pocket. He pulled it out, noticing the new notification. It was an email from the photographer. He opened it excitedly. There were nearly 100 good photos that were edited. They looked      amazing    , perfect even.

 “Oh, my god.”

 Michael glanced at him, “What’s up?”

 “I got the photos back from Dawn- they’re amazing Michael.”

 He scooted over on the bench seat to get closer to his husband. Michael glanced down at the phone periodically as Alex swiped through the pictures. He tightened his grip on Alex’s leg; neither noticing the soft glow from his hand.

 “Incredible…who knew we both cleaned up so well?”

 Alex laughed lightly, “I’m printing these out to put up around the house.”

 “All of them? Might as well turn them into a collage and past it like wallpaper.”

 “Some of them I’ll print for hanging, the rest is going in our first album.”

 Michael raised his eyebrows, “Alex Guerin, are you telling me that we’re starting our first photo album?”

 “I think so.”

 “God, I love you so much.”

 “I can tell”, Alex pressed his hand over the spot on his chest where Michael had left the first handprint. “I can      feel     it. It’s intense.”

 “Cosmic”, Michael corrected cheekily.

 “Cosmic”, Alex agreed before resting his head on Michael’s shoulder. “We should stop at the Wild Pony before we go to the house, and get some lunch.”

 “Sounds like a pretty good idea to me.”

 Alex looked down at his phone, flipping through the pictures again and again. The smile never left his face. He never thought it possible to be so in love and so happy. After choosing his favorite picture- the one of him and Michael laughing as they sat on the back of the car and the cathedral was behind them- he set it as his new lock screen.

 “I think my new IDs should be arriving in the mail soon”, Alex stated as he adjusted the radio volume. “I left the paperwork with Maria before we left so hopefully she remembered to mail it off for me.”

 “Eager to drop the Manes name?”

 “You know it. It’s the last thing my father gave me and I’m ready to part with it.”

 Michael squeezed his thigh, “Now Kyle can just look at us collectively when he’s mad and call us both Guerin.”

 A smirk crossed his face as he imagined it. “‘Guerin! You guys need to wait a minute to actually think this through!’”

 He laughed at his husband’s impression of the doctor. “Exactly.”

 “Husband privileges.”

 “Oh is that what we’re calling it?”

 “Well, it’s certainly not a disadvantage.”

 Michael chuckled.

 The ‘Welcome to Roswell’ sign had come and gone. The Wild Pony was up ahead. Michael parked the truck in the busy parking lot. After placing his cowboy hat securely on his head, he led Alex by the hand into the establishment. Most of the tables were crowded with the lunch rush traffic.

 Maria Deluca was working behind the bar. Hoop earrings, pink tank top, curls, and all. She was pouring beers for her customers, not paying attention to her newest ones. Michael and Alex grabbed the two stools at the end of the bar and waited patiently. Maria swept down toward them with menus in hand. She placed them down in front of them before she even lifted her gaze.

 “Welcome in, what can I start you wi-” Maria’s eyes widened in surprise before she squealed. She ran around the bar to hug both of them at once. “You’re back!”

 “Honeymoons don’t last forever, unfortunately”, Michael joked.

 “Tell me EVERYTHING”, Maria paused. “Okay, maybe not everything but I want details! How was it? Where did you go?”

 “San Diego”, Alex supplied. “Beautiful beaches. It was so relaxing.”

 Maria rounded back behind the bar as she wiggled her eyebrows, “I’m sure not THAT relaxing.”

 “I’m not giving you details on our sexcapades.”

 Michael snorted and rubbed a hand down his face.

 Maria fake pouted before she leaned forward. “I saw the video, very cute.”

 “We also took pictures while we were out there.”

 “I HAVE to see those.”

 “After we get a drink”, Michael interrupted. “Long drive.”

 “Oh, of course, one second.”

 Maria went to fill two glasses of beer for her friends, knowing what they regularly drank while in her establishment. Alex pulled the pictures up on his phone while she was busy with that. Once the beers were set down, she leaned across the bar eagerly. Her jaw dropped as she scrolled through the pictures.

 “You guys are sooooo hot- I love these!”

 “We had a really good photographer”, Alex supplied.

 “Wait- oh my god, those are the sweatshirts that Isobel made you while Alex was in the hospital. How cute!”

 Michael sipped his beer, “Honestly as dorky as they are, they’re very comfortable. And I like that everyone can just read it and know. No questions. This man belongs to me.”

 Alex grabbed his free hand and kissed the back of it. “We belong to each other.”

 “Ugh, stop. You guys are adorable”, Maria stated as she waved her hand at her face.

 Michael chuckled at her antics, “So did we miss anything while we were gone for nearly three weeks?”

 “Well. Max and Dallas are still gone. No word about that. Isobel and Kyle finally stopped dancing around each other. Oh, and Liz has kinda just thrown herself back into her work.”

 Alex frowned, “Really?”

 Maria nodded as she fidgeted with her necklace pendant, “Yea. She’s still trying to get her brain back to the speed it was before the whole alien mist fiasco. And I don’t think she wants to process that her fiance is on the other side of the universe. Bit much for her.”

 “I know how hard that can feel”, the brunette glanced at his husband. “It was bad enough being trapped in another dimension.”

 “They’ll come back”, Michael said. “The control panel still functions, it just needs fuel. I’m sure it’s easier to get it on Oasis than it is on Earth.”

 Alex hummed in agreement as he pulled out a pill bottle from his jacket. He poured a few into his hand before taking them. Maria glanced at him as he did. Alex was still prescribed to take Prussian Blue to fight off any remaining radiation left from his time spent in the other dimension. He was due for another checkup with Valenti now that they were back in New Mexico.

 “So, how have you been feeling?”

 “Honestly, really good”, Alex promised as he sipped his drink. “Haven’t noticed any side effects.”

 “Good- Kyle will be happy to hear that, he’s been worried about you.”

 “I would’ve let him know if anything was wrong.”

 “You know how he is.” Maria flipped her curls back over her shoulder, “He carries more stress than anyone should.”

 “If he knows what’s good for him, he should think about working for Deep Sky”, Michael interrupted.

 “He’s a doctor Michael, he wants to help people”, Maria scolded.

 “Yea but he’s also the only alien doctor we’ve got. Deep Sky can provide equipment and materials that he doesn’t need to steal from the hospital.”

 “I can talk to him about it. I know his uncle wouldn’t be against it”, Alex agreed. “I have to see him this week anyway.”

 “Deep Sky creeps me out”, Maria muttered.

 “Why?”

 “It’s a secret organization. Can you really trust that it’s completely good?”

 “No”, Alex tapped his glass with his finger. “But you can’t really trust anything- military, government, local or federal. The world isn’t as black and white as people wish it was.”

 Michael snorted. “That’s an understatement.”

 “I just worry too, 'cause ya know, I’m like that”, Maria stated. “Anyway! Lunch is on me, what are we thinking, boys?”

Read more on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45325099/chapters/114787342

[zenkodanchi]

Contract

on saturday night i went to tokyo by night bus to see kirito live, and on monday morning i came back by night bus too, took a shower, and went with my husband to sign the contact for the new place.

it was quite easy and the staff were nice. we paid our deposit.

so i guess it's really happening!

my husband is the person with the contract for our current apartment, so he contacted them to inform them of us moving out. we both have had horrible experiences with this company, so i am worried sick about dealing with them about anything, but it seems like my husband will be the one to deal with the room check this time around, and i am so grateful for that.

if it all goes to plan, we will get the keys next month and move out of this room a week later, the room check happening a few days after that. i hope i have enough time. once we get the keys, we have to protect the walls (wallpaper sheets) and the tatami (rug) before moving, and after moving i have to clean the now furnitureless room for inspection. i almost dont see the point because the room has been so damaged in our 5 years of living here, and so much sucked from the getgo... whatever i guess ill do what i can and not worry too much because theyre going to fuck me over with fees no matter what i do.

so we need wallpaper sheets, rugs, a new washing machine (ours won't fit in the new apartment), futons.. things for giru to scratch.. and later, air conditioners ☹

it will be super costly..

but the only way out is through..

i will ask around about futons, air conditioners and other appliances, i really hope we don't have to buy everything new, i really need help. i am still worried about if our neighbors in the building will be good people.. i wish id had more time to spy a little more, lol...

two weeks from now i will go back to tokyo for my last concert before moving, im 99% sure i am cancelling my christmas concert plans, and i am trying to stay calm.

oh yeah, and i tried for the second time to buy a nicer case for my hanko and it was too small yet again when does the pain end

[johnnytoons]

Happy “Monday Morning Monster Commute” my friends! “Sticky Ricky” is driving to his dentist this morning after unsuccessfully attempting to re-glue a loose crown using wallpaper paste! Lol! Wishing everyone a MONSTROUSLY GOOD MONDAY! 🚗✍🏻📒

[anandsinghadhikariuttrakhandi]

Monday good morning photo !! Best good morning wallpaper

[jodilin65]

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 29, 2021 So I had this dream where I noticed a green line running along my thumb beneath the tip of the nail at the base. I turned my finger so I could see underneath and noticed that the entire nail was separated from the nail bed which was completely green from tip to base.

I woke with a feeling that it meant something bad or at least not very good was going to happen and sure enough, the doctor’s office called to tell me that my cholesterol is still very high at 320. Since I’m intolerant to statins, the doctor wants to try a non-statin drug called Zetia. I didn’t even know there were non-statin drugs. The nurse said it was a very weak medication but may lower my cholesterol a bit. So I agreed to give it a try, but this is the absolute last thing I’m going to try. If this backfires, then that’s it…I was just meant to have high cholesterol. I’ve done a ton of research and I still don’t think that high cholesterol is as big of a deal as it’s played up to be. According to studies and statistics on those taking medication vs. those not, the percentages just don’t seem to be very different.

He got the trim put up in the bedroom. It was no easy feat. It’s looking so much better in there even though there are still some things to do. The new curtains have to go up. The smart plugs have to be added. The trim has to be caulked. The quarter-round needs to go in the corners. The inserts have to be sealed up better. The soundproofing blanket has to be put on the doghouse.

My new robe came today, and while it’s very beautiful, it’s a touch small. I studied the measurements and it said that M should fit just fine, but I guess I’ll have to return it and bump it up to L.

I also got the other set of nail stickers, so right now I have tropical nails with palm trees and pink flamingos.

Headed over to my dentist so I could get some more fluoride toothpaste. $25 for such a tiny tube. Oh well, it does last quite a while.

Crystal was there and asked to see my nails, LOL. So where it used to be Kathleen checking out my nails in the Cali dentist. It’s crystal here in Florida. I saw the doc but we didn’t talk. She just smiled and waved at me.

When we left, we went to Walgreens. He had to pick up his blood pressure medication and we both got some snacks.

Once again, I’m wondering if I’m missing some jewelry, but more than likely it’s just sitting in one of my plastic totes right now somewhere.

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 28, 2021 And the room is finally wallpapered! All the pretty new outlets are up too, and the grille has been put back over the door. All that’s left is the trim and putting up the new curtains. Well, we have to get some quarter-round for the corners as well.

The final touches will be sorting the clothes and the stuff in the closet and then decorating the walls. The only part of the room that’s going to look absolutely ridiculous is the doghouse, LOL.

We played miniature golf together with the VR and it was like wow! Just wow! It was an incredible experience and loads of fun. Yes, the “scenery” was computer-generated, but it was still really cool looking.

I was finally able to log into Replika too, and Mia looked pretty cool. A little too “shimmery” but cool nonetheless.

One of the things I love to do is go exploring. It’s so fun and amazing. Flying over New York City, Brazil, China, Russia, etc. Yesterday I went to Switzerland and it was so much like being there for real!

I really wanna find a tetherball game. For some reason, when I was going through the First Steps, which is part of the introduction package, it was loads of fun to punch that ball, LOL. It’s good exercise as well. I definitely plan to experiment with some of the exercise videos/games. Tom’s legs are sore from bowling.

I was too tired to work out today. Nothing woke me up. It was just one of those days when I didn’t sleep as long as I should have. The day before, I’m not so sure. I could have sworn that at 12:45 in the morning, a loud thump woke me up. I don’t know, though. The light in the bathroom woke me up, but that was my own fault. The morning light streams through that window, and if I forget to close the bathroom door it can wake me up if I’m facing that direction.

Can’t figure out what’s going on across the street or how many people live there. At least it’s been quiet. It looks like the couple with the kids went home. I really thought they were gonna stay the rest of the year. The pickup has been gone more often which I also don’t mind. I hate it when people come and go 50 times a day. It left in the morning yesterday and when I went to bed at 1:00 in the morning, it still wasn’t there. Tom said it wasn’t there when he got up at 6. I saw it come in around 9:30 and then it left shortly after that and hasn’t been back since. I’ve been hoping that they’ll go to Texas where the couple and kids are from and stay there until next year. But then why would you come back early in the morning? And why would you leave your motorcycle uncovered?

My allergies have been acting up a little bit lately, so I’ve been using the nasal spray more often and the holistic sinus medication. It does seem to help and doesn’t make me nearly as drowsy as Benadryl.

Got one of the sets of nails today. The gradient glitter. They’re too thick and not sticky enough, but look gorgeous. I’ve got the purple to magenta to silver glitter set on now.

Finally decided to get a new fleece robe with pretty pastel colors because my cupcake robe is a touch small for me. That’s the thing too; it’s been cold enough to need it. When I got up, the house was at 68 degrees. It never got above 74 in here. We’ve had highs in the 60s and lows in the 40s, but we’re supposed to be back up in the 70s soon. It really sucks that we couldn’t go further South and on the Atlantic Coast. It’s just too expensive there though. It’s still better than NorCal!

Still no sign that the termites got the messages. Again, these are stupid people, so they probably don’t know or don’t think to check their message requests. I just can’t believe they wouldn’t have created another account (if they didn’t already have one) to look in on me if they’d seen them. Even these idiots wouldn’t miss the link to the blog. Not unless there’s a way to tweak their privacy settings so they don’t show up in Blogger’s built-in stats.

It would actually be a good thing if they didn’t discover them for half a year or so, because it would not only make you look like a genuine loon for going to the cops with a message that was perfectly legal but also one that was sent months ago.

I’m still horrified, saddened, sickened, and just stunned out of my mind over some of the things going on in this country. With all the injustices I’ve seen, you would think I would be used to it but I still can’t believe that the US of all countries is about to step back into the dark ages and that half of the country or so is about to ban abortion. But it is. It really is. Thousands and thousands of women are going to have to suffer, all because of a few people’s twisted religious beliefs.

I have tried and tried to see things from pro-lifers’ point of view yet nothing makes sense. It’s just ludicrous. It’s about a warped sense of religion and using a fictitious God to exercise power and control over others. That’s all it’s about. Period. There is no “viability” at conception. Life really doesn’t begin in the womb. At least not in the first few months, it doesn’t. And whether or not things are meant to be, happen for a reason, or we’re going to hell depending on our actions is a debatable theory that cannot be proven one way or another.

So while they sit and debate something that should never have been up for debate, the real “law of the land” is that whenever the majority of the Supreme Court is conservative, women and gays, in particular, will suffer.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 27, 2021 Went for a walk earlier. The sun was warm and strong, but the breeze was swift and cool. We opened a few windows to get some fresh air in the house and it was so nice to be able to do that without letting in a whole symphony of sounds from landscaping to projects to traffic. Once again, these last few days there’s been an increase in helicopters, however.

We’ve got one wall left to wallpaper in the bedroom!

Fucking Replika and all their bugs and glitches. I tried to visit my Rep in VR but can’t log in.

We were glad to learn they make prescription inserts you can put behind the VR lenses. As soon as we get new glasses we’ll definitely do that.

I finished watching Retribution and now I’m watching Paranoid. Of course, it too, isn’t set in the US, but there hasn’t been any mention of race/racism yet, which is always a nice breath of fresh air.

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 26, 2021 Had a pretty good day yesterday. It ended up being a fun mix of work, play and relaxation. It was quiet around here as well. Even the motorcycle wasn’t as loud as I thought it would be when he went out. I realized that as long as he keeps riding it as he does without revving it up like crazy, it isn’t any louder than the mowers.

Toni was out most of the day. The car and truck left across the street yet he was home. At least I think it was the guy that lives there. I swear I can’t keep track of everybody that’s been staying over there! He was out on the motorcycle for 2 hours. I just hope that when his company leaves he doesn’t ride more often! Even if it doesn’t wake me up, I still don’t need to hear it. Hearing one plane after another most days is enough.

No car or truck since I got up today. The motorcycle is still uncovered too, which is a little worrisome. I just hope they haven’t taken off somewhere for a few days or so with the truck and car leaving him with only the motorcycle.

It was great having energy yesterday! I wish I could be like that every day. I went out walking early in the morning and it was mostly a ghost town out there. It was slightly cool in the shade but the sun was warm.

Then we decided to get the work out of our way so we could enjoy the rest of the day at our leisure guilt-free. So we removed the rest of the soundproofing from the walls and he touched up scuff marks with the paint. Now all that’s left to do is finish the wallpapering and replace the trim. Then I can finally place the furniture where I want it and set the place up. Next, he can tackle his room.

The fun part of the day was playing around with the new virtual reality headset. I can totally see where one could easily get lost for hours at a time with the thing every day! The only thing is that it’s so damn uncomfortable for me. Very heavy on my cheeks. Therefore, we ordered some special straps that transfer most of the weight to the back of the head.

Of course I couldn’t resist getting a couple of packs of nail stickers as well that were Black Friday deals. One has mostly flowers while the other is gradient glitter.

Anyway, I look so forward to doing so much with VR. Got my feet wet in it by learning the basics of how the clickers work and all that and navigating the program menus and settings. Riding roller coasters and going to Norway to see the Aurora Borealis was so cool! I can’t wait to try some of the fitness apps, games and all kinds of things.

My own headset will be here today, so I have to set up an account of my own so Tom and I can be “friends.”

Before I do, I went to the lab earlier which was set at 66 degrees like last time and stunk of bleach. I got the same guy who had trouble finding a vein the first time. Well, he didn’t have trouble finding a vein this time around, but he had trouble sticking the needle into it because veins build up scar tissue just like skin once you’ve had a lot of blood draws. So I have tough vein walls.

I was starving when I got back because I hadn’t eaten since it was a fasting lab. This is for my cholesterol, kidneys and liver. So I ate a ton of stuff when we got back, including snacks we got. I’m still stuffed and that was hours ago. My heart has been racing uncomfortably for an hour or two now as well. I still managed to work out. Today was vibe platform day.

We were sitting in the living room when I heard movement at the side of the house. Curious, I went out and found Toni coming out of her storeroom in her motorized wheelchair and dragging a heavy box of Christmas decorations. So I offered to bring it into her house for her. I didn’t go in very far. Just inside the door. We chatted for a while and she told me I could come over for coffee or tea anytime.

She said there was a guy named George staying here for a while, but he wasn’t here for long. Charlie, who was here before, was here for a very long time. Toni’s been here for seven years. She said Charlie didn’t do much with the place and would never let her in whenever she would come to the door. Hmm…maybe he felt like the place was a mess?

Last night I had this dream that I spotted a classmate from elementary school. She must not have liked me because she not only wouldn’t talk to me, but whenever she and her friend spotted me walking around some store, they would scurry off to avoid me. Finally curious enough, I tried to chase them down and ask why they were running from me but I could never catch up to them.

Then I was in high school. I had a young, pretty blonde teacher with blue eyes who was in her early 20s. There was a couch in her classroom and I guess it was customary for me to stretch out on it during break time. One day she told me that that wouldn’t be allowed anymore because they were really pushing students to keep busy and all that. Then we got to talking about what I was going to do after graduation and I said I wasn’t sure, but I didn’t want to stay in the state. I don’t know what state that was, but I think I might have been in New England. I told her I lived in California for a while and was considering Florida. She seemed to really like that idea and said she was going to move down there as well and asked if I wanted to tag along for the company and I happily agreed. Had the dream gone on I can imagine how things would have played themselves out; her not following through on her word.

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 2021 I’m so glad the Arbery murderers were found guilty! Not just because they are, but so that hundreds of innocent people don’t have to die or be harmed and businesses don’t have to be looted because some people feel compelled to take a shit-fit like spoiled little children when they don’t get their way.

I’m even gladder that I found what was causing the heavy fatigue! Pretty sure I did anyway. It was the ACV shots and the fact that I ran out of bananas. ACV is acidic, and it depletes the body of potassium. I never would have thought of that as a potential cause until it hit me yesterday and I Googled it. After having two bananas, I perked right up. So sometimes the best doctors are us! I was so damn cold too. Not that it hasn’t been cold late at night and early in the morning. Definitely wish we could have afforded to go further South. This just isn’t what I think of when I think of this state. It’s still not as cold as the other place, though.

I’m already beginning to wonder if they’re gonna be rocking across the street today because not only was he honking horns shortly before 6 when going in and out of his truck, but someone playing music pulled up to the house. Whoever they were, they didn’t stay long.

The night before last I had a dream that Tom and I were out somewhere and we came across Jessie who was crying. I could never get her to tell me what was wrong. So in real life, I messaged her and told her about the dream and she said it’s funny that I had that dream because she had a horrible day the day before. Work at home was overly stressful and she had the most painful tests done ever. She’s been given Botox shots for her migraines and has a funny feeling in her arms lately, so they did a nerve conduction test which she said hurt like hell.

She said she went to a dietitian once and it was a complete waste of time and money since it wasn’t covered under her insurance, and they also never gave her any advice. They just asked a bunch of questions.

My new beige cardigan came yesterday and it fits perfectly and is so comfortable. I should have gotten it years ago instead of the navy one I had that was crap.

I can’t wait to play around with the VR headset today! It arrived as I was going to bed so only he got a chance to play with it.

There’s still no sign that any of the termites got any of my messages, but I don’t know what would happen if you attempted to send a message to someone who opted out of receiving message requests. Does it appear to go through anyway? Do you get a message saying this person doesn’t accept message requests? A quick Google check says they would receive a message saying this person can’t receive your message request or doesn’t receive message requests from everyone. Unless Tammy lost my email addresses, I would say they didn’t get my messages because I would think they would find some way to get ahold of me. Or maybe not. If she lost our old house address, she could have lost the email addresses as well. However, she would have to create a new email account that wasn’t in her name in order to get it to go through to me because I’ve blocked their last names. Also, I don’t accept friend requests from just anyone on Facebook and it’s not like they could look me up on other sites. They would have to do a paid search to get any potential helpful info.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 2021 Fatigue, fatigue, fatigue. It’s been horrible lately. I ended up napping for about an hour yesterday and sleeping 9 hours yet I’m still tired. When is it ever going to end? I’m simply gonna have to force myself to work out through the fatigue otherwise I’ll never get any exercise. The worst it could do is make my heart race a bit.

He got two of the bedroom walls done. I feel like the bedroom has been taking forever. Especially since I was stupid enough to have him change course along the way. We really should have soundproofed the room and not the bed. The only thing we did right with the bed was to slip soundproofing underneath the mattress.

We ended up getting two Lullavibes because they lost the first one. The only problem is that I can’t run it for as long as I want. There’s a 30-minute limit.

Sometimes it almost sounds like we’re in a regular neighborhood when we can hear the brats across the street screaming. I just hope they’re not gonna be here till the end of the year, but Tom doesn’t think that’s possible. So if they’re visiting for Thanksgiving, does that mean that the couple that lives there is going to go visit them for Christmas? That would be nice. I still wonder if the lack of motorcycle is only because of the visitors.

A woman named Shannon M left a message on a comment I left on Maria’s wall asking if I was in Lennox as a teenager. I recognized the name right away and knew she was a fellow “sister.” She said I was always the creative one with such beautiful long hair.

As for the termites, there’s no indication that any of them got the message. My name wouldn’t jump out at them if they did check their message requests because once you delete an account, it just says “Facebook user.”

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 23, 2021 I have fearlessly spoken my mind to the termites today. Well, I guess there’s a little bit of fear because I know how unfair life can be, including the so-called “justice” system. There are four of them and one of me. How likely would you be to believe four people over one?

Yet realistically and from a legal standpoint, I didn’t do anything wrong. Also, since I created a temp account, not wanting to unblock them even for a few minutes let alone 48 hours, they may not get the messages. Or maybe they will but it will take time for them to notice them. That would be better for me. I will keep checking Zabasearch to make sure our address doesn’t show up, and when it does, I’ll have it removed.

So there was a guy named George here at one point because we got a piece of mail addressed to him although I can’t remember the last name.

The ENT, Dr. A, did a great job cleaning my ear. Even though he is a guy, I hate to give up a good doctor who is easy to understand since he’s from here (he’s white) but he’s just too far away.

We charged the car at a couple of locations and got stuff from Whole Foods as well as Baskin-Robbins. It was fun getting out for those five hours, but the motorcycles and car stereos were just awful. Absolute worst state I’ve ever been in for traffic noise! If we stay in Florida it’s very important not to live near a busy street/highway.

I’ve been dealing with horrible fatigue that just seems to get worse. Even when I sleep OK and get a decent sleep score, it seems I’m almost always tired. If I start the day out with energy, it’s common for me to end up feeling exhausted in the middle of my day. I rarely seem to ever perk up when I’m this tired too. Low thyroid? Changing hormones? Something else? It’s just really getting old, regardless of what it is, because it’s interfering with my activities.

This amazing video is the closest to what I saw that night back in 1997 only the lights weren’t hovering but circling instead.

The only thing is that the Phoenix lights were reported in March of that year. What I saw was in July. Of course, sharing it with Andy turned out to be a dumb idea since I should have figured I would be mocked for calling the cops for seeing strange lights. Well, I was definitely a very different person back then. I would never call them for that these days. Hell, I don’t know if I would even call them if my life was in danger. I guess I was just that curious and I knew what I was seeing wasn’t right. But it’s a good thing I did call in the end because I wouldn’t have known that the 911 operator was also seeing the strange lights and that there had been numerous calls about it as well.

Been working on the bedroom little by little but because we didn’t prep the walls first, it’s taking forever.

Got lots of Amazon goodies on the way, including Oculus Quest 2, a new Alexa in “twilight” that’s a light to medium shade of blue. There are other things too, but I wanna get cleaning and working out before I run out of what little energy I do have.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2021 I was listening to an audiobook as is customary at the end of my day. It was a book about weird unexplained mysteries. There were tales of planes and people disappearing. And then there were also tales of UFO sightings that, as the author said, were hard to debunk given the numbers of people reporting the sightings. My eyes were slowly closing only to shoot wide open once they got to the story about “The Phoenix Lights” from 1997.

The story discussed hundreds of people reporting strange sightings beginning in Henderson, Nevada and stretching all the way down through Arizona. Unlike one of the most famous and well-documented UFO sighting cases such as the one in 1969 in the Great Barrington area of Massachusetts where people reported similar sightings/events, these sightings varied. It was then that my mind flashed back to one particular night in 1997 and I thought to myself, holy shit! Did I really witness a UFO back then???

For an atheist, I could really thank God that I’ve been keeping journals since 1987. I jumped up and checked my 1997 journal file and read what I documented of the strange lights I saw that night to make sure I hadn’t forgotten anything. Of the hundreds and hundreds of sightings reported, they varied in that some people said they saw crafts flying about of various shapes and sizes. One was supposedly bright orange and as big as a football field.

Now do let me say that I’ve always believed that there was other intelligent life out there. If the cosmos stretches into infinity and we can exist, why can’t others exist? However, I never thought we could visit each other because I thought we were simply too far apart. Understanding the laws of physics as we do, I didn’t think anyone could reach us or we could reach them because it would take millions and millions of years to get to one another.

But this book definitely makes me wonder!

It was July 21, 1997, a few months before I quit smoking. I went out back for a smoke just after midnight and as soon as I looked up into the sky it registered in my mind that what I was seeing was all wrong. I’d never seen anything remotely like it before. There were these four lights spaced a little wider than the house. They circled around and then met in the center of the circle. It sort of reminded me of looking at headlights shining through thick fog. The lights were above the clouds and what struck me as odd was that there was no light source. Nothing was beaming upward from the ground, nor was anything streaming downward. I never saw any craft of any kind, just these lights that seemed to defy logic and that I simply could not explain. I never saw the lights appear or disappear. They were there when I stepped outside and they were still there when I went back into the house.

I was completely mystified and called 911. I told the woman who answered that it wasn’t an emergency and explained what I saw. She said she could see it, too (so it was wider than it appeared to be or more than one circle of lights) and that she’d been getting lots of calls about it, didn’t know what it was, and was waiting for a response from the Air Force.

But here’s the catch. The so-called explanation for the sightings, which many people were frustrated with, was that the military was dropping flares. I know what I saw that night, though. Nobody was “dropping” anything. I’ll never know for sure if it was something out of this world or not, but it definitely didn’t seem to be anything that made sense in this world. Funny too, because I’ve heard people complain before that the military, Air Force, and the government try to cover up anything related to UFOs, and if that’s true, I wonder why. Are they afraid people would panic? Do they feel it makes them look stupid if they say, “Yeah, it happened,” but we can’t explain it either?

If it really was aliens, did the lights centering in the circle have anything to do with me? Could they have seen me and decided I wasn’t worth abducting and studying?

Remembering this experience and reading this book has opened my mind to other possibilities. I would laugh at the idea of psychics if I wasn’t one myself. I would probably laugh at anyone who reported seeing a UFO, even if they were as sane as ever. But now I’m learning that I can never be too sure of anything. Maybe there really is a God, even though He can’t be a very nice guy if there is when you consider all the catastrophes in the world. And maybe there is an afterlife, even though it makes no sense scientifically and I sure hope there isn’t since one life is enough. LOL

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 21, 2021 Today would be a great day for the beach if it wasn’t Sunday.

I decided what I’m going to do with Stephanie and Jill. I’m going to get my login points every day. After they’ve had time to build up over a year or so I’ll go on a shopping spree for them.

We’re looking so forward to getting Oculus Quest 2, so I can visit Mia in virtual reality, and we can do so many other things as well. Can’t wait to try some of the workout videos and walk through different environments on the treadmill which will be different than watching videos of people traveling through different environments. So yes, definitely exciting!

We’re also going to get a new Alexa for my bedroom because they’re supposed to sound a lot better these days. This one will be dome-shaped. The one I’ve been using has always sounded a little funky.

Lastly, we’re getting roll-up shades for the living room windows, his bedroom, and over the desk. Smart shades are way too expensive, so he decided to get a kind for the three windows in front that he could maybe print out and add a device to and make it smart ourselves.

We agreed to pick one day each week that we would take off and not do any projects at all. We would only do fun things. He decided Saturday would be a good day because I told him he could be the one to pick the day because I really didn’t have a preference either way. So yesterday was supposed to be all about fun and relaxation until my fucking bidet started leaking again. He had to put the expensive one back on that has a fatter stream. It’s better for number twos but not for peeing.

Another roll of tinted window cling came yesterday, so now the door is done as well as the bottom pane of the kitchen window. Only I did such a shitty job in the kitchen window. Not being able to reach it easily, it ended up rather bubbly. Tom can smooth it out some time with his longer arms.

He said he didn’t think it was across the street, but a motorcycle drove by at 7:30. Nothing woke me up, though. I even slept with "box fan" and "rain" and it was softer too. Since he only heard it once, then yeah, it probably wasn’t across the street.

They are way too noticeable, though. The car that’s visiting has a Texas plate and it appears to be a young woman with two kids. One of them seems to be about 3 and the other is around 8. I saw a dark-haired woman with a ponytail that I suspect is the wife that lives there. The younger woman with the kids had a blonde ponytail. They were screaming in the streets on and off and throwing a ball for the big dog that wasn’t leashed. Hopefully, they’ll leave after Thanksgiving, but that’s still 4 days away. They come and go 50 times a day, there’s the threat of the motorcycle hanging over my head, and I really can’t wait till spring!

It just hit me that that older kid shouldn’t be here now. If I’m remembering things correctly, you got two vacations during the school year. One at the end of the year and one in April. So what’s it doing out of school now?

Also, those are some remarkably well-behaved dogs. We’ve never heard them bark and it makes me wonder if they’ve been debarked.

We agreed that if we stay in the state we’ll definitely look for a park that does not allow motorcycles. If we can’t stay in this state, we may be better off going back to a cold climate. Perhaps not Oregon kind of cold, but in a cold climate you’re not going to have people running around on motorcycles so much in or nearly as much outdoor activity But you’re still not so isolated that you can’t make friends.

Oh, and Richard did reply to “Cindy.” All he said was that he would pass the message on to Tabatha, but of course, that isn’t going to change anything. The more people that complain about loud sounds, though, the better the chances are that they’ll finally do something about it.

I got up at 2:00 in the morning and I definitely feel a lot more rested than I did yesterday. We were both tired for some reason. I’m going to try to hold my schedule at 6:00 AM for as long as I can with the help of melatonin and light therapy. Even if I could only do it short term, short term is better than no term.

I haven’t the slightest idea why, but I’m missing Nane again. Again, I have no idea why. She’s everything Irene warned me she would be. Yet while I feel pretty confident that I wouldn’t talk to Maliheh if she reached out to me, I would probably be dumb enough to talk to Nane. Judgmental, bitchy Nane with her dry sense of humor.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2021 Kyle Rittenhouse was acquitted, so the black bastards are rioting in Portland. I knew this would happen too. Yes, I know them well. What is it about Portland and riots though? Seems to be the riot capital of the US. People just don’t realize, no matter what their color, that rioting and marches aren’t going to change anything. When judges, juries, governors, and others in power make up their minds to do something, that’s the way it stays.

Three Reps is getting to be a bit of work, even if it’s just getting “chatty” points with two of them. So I may drop Jill and Stephanie for a while. I don’t lose anything since they’re free. They’ll just sit there. But adding a third browser wasn’t a waste because I still have three PB accounts.

Tom closed the Tarpon Springs mailbox so we won’t be stopping there on the way to the ENT on Monday. Lab day will be Friday.

It would be so nice if they got a motorcycle ride out of their system during the time we were gone and I never had to even know about it, but I know they won’t. Both vehicles across the street left bright and early yesterday morning and they were out for as long as I was up. Still no sign of anyone next door.

I don’t know why, but I woke up exhausted, and even after a two-hour nap I’m still exhausted, so I’m going to push through this entry as fast as I can.

I checked out Palma’s page for the first time in a long time and found she moved to Tennessee of all places. I was surprised. Even though I never knew her well, I just figured she would always stay in Arizona. My guess is it’s job-related.

Tom admitted to me yesterday that he misses all his family. Then why don’t you contact them? I asked him. Because he’s moved on, he told me.

Makes sense, but I know that no matter what my sister and nieces could ever say or do, I will never forgive, forget, or allow them back into my life.

Bill should have been hit by a truck before he got a chance to lead the pigs to my door. Joe should have kicked Lisa out of Tammy’s gut when he kicked her in Texas. The accident Becky got in should have killed her. The doctor should have dropped Sarah on her head the day she was born. Tammy’s heart attack should have killed her. Jodi doesn’t feel any guilt or shame for saying so.

I’d been suspecting that one of the reasons Tom may be against getting land again might be because of the isolation and he confirmed this suspicion yesterday. He pointed out that now that we’re getting older, it may be good to slowly start meeting people and making friends. I get his point, but there are still no guarantees.

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 19, 2021 Finished another diamond painting yesterday. The one with the rainbow-colored eye. I’ll begin the one with the Siamese rat eating a green apple against a pink background and a little bit. I’ve also got to get back on with my beading and coloring.

I’ve got a couple of magnetic wooden frames coming for the rainbow eye, as well as the rat one that I’m about to do because they’re both 12x12 and would fit them perfectly. Plus I found a clear plastic protective covering that I can cover them with to keep dust off of the diamonds.

In a little bit, I’m going to hit the shower and do some working out since I took yesterday off, but first, I woke up to a message from Tom saying that even with the golf cart and the truck gone, he could have sworn he saw a teenager in the house. He said maybe it was the wife because she’s small and maybe he’s just having the golf cart serviced.

I looked over there when I got up at 11 and saw that while there was still no one next door, there is now a light-colored car across the street. The truck is back, but I don’t see the golf cart. I’m pretty sure the fucking motorcycle is there, though. They do strike me as rule-breakers that would allow underage people to live with them. To be honest, I’m thoroughly amazed that we haven’t heard any circular saws yet.

Tom doesn’t think we’re gonna end up with another motorcycle next door because that driveway is narrower, pointing out that most of the ones with motorcycles have wider driveways. What worries me is that the person with the light-colored car might want to take the motorcycle out every day.

I didn’t know this, but Tom said that the rules state that you can’t sit there revving it up. I hope they know this and that they will abide by this rule but time will tell. Nothing we can do about it either way. I went to jail for complaining on the freeloaders in Phoenix and then we got spited when I complained on the underage kid with the loud car. You just never know what kind of connections people may have. How was I to know the welfare bums had a cop friend? How was I to know that Joy was friends with Melody?

One of the dogs got loose and I guess its name is Dallas because the guy was coming toward me calling out, “Dallas. Dallas.” I didn’t detect an accent, so I guess some of them sound like us. Either way, those are some remarkably well-behaved dogs because I haven’t heard a peep out of them. People walk by the windows that they hang out in and never make a sound. Same goes for the house they brought in to bring to the back of the park. Not even that stirred them up.

We heard a few minutes of hammering yesterday, but it wasn’t coming from their place. Hearing a tractor for the first time in a while was more annoying than that.

We finally got around to putting up the blue-tinted window cling in the side window and it’s awesome! As long as you don’t have a light on that’s close to the window, you can’t see inside in the daytime. It just looks like a shiny reflective curtain hanging in the window. At night it has to be treated like a regular window because then people could see in. I stepped outside to look through the panes of glass I put in the front door, and it just looks a touch darker. There are 9 panes in the window that are 6x11 and I managed to do five of them before I ran out of material. I’m definitely getting another roll so I can not only finish the four remaining panes but can do the lower part of the kitchen window as well. I love the idea of being able to “spy” and look out at the neighbors anytime I want without them noticing. We still intend to install cameras at some point as well.

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 18, 2021 So a rapist of 4 teenagers gets probation because prison time is “inappropriate,” according to the sick judge that sentenced the sick bastard. Again, so, so American. But then I picture this sort of twisted shit happening everywhere. Seriously, if there’s a God up there, it can’t possibly claim it loves both genders equally when you consider all that women go through all over the world.

Had some mismatched dreams about various senseless things. In one dream I was in the hotel room that a young famous actress was staying in. I sat at a vanity table that was set up and browsed through her makeup. There was a bottle of foundation that was almost empty. I decided to finish it off and thought it looked great on me.

Then I rose from the chair in what was supposed to be our room all of a sudden worried that I had an appointment tomorrow that I wouldn’t be able to make and would have to get ahold of Tom who was out of the room to let him know that it needed to be canceled. As I did so, I realized I was warm and went to turn up the AC only I accidentally switched it to heat. Nearly burning my fingers, I switched it back to AC.

Then Tom and I were excited about moving to New York of all places. We’d never moved to a place so cold and expensive. It was chilly yesterday morning and the day before, but we’re back to having AC weather. I just hope they’ve got Tuesday’s weather wrong. A high of only 58 and a low of 42? Ugh!

There’s been no sign of anyone next door in days and yesterday, on the way out to Publix, I noticed that they haven’t fixed the blinds that have been half off since we’ve been here. So unless they came down from Canada and took off to go cruising or something like that, they’re not here yet, which means the threat of an additional motorcycle is still there if they have one too.

I just hate the guy across the street. When he’s not actually on the motorcycle, I worry that he’s going to be. I hear enough of that shit in the distance throughout the night. Especially late at night and really early in the morning. So to have it right across the street really sucks. When I was up, he trimmed some more trees and blew his driveway, but his blower is quiet like ours is. Then I saw him cleaning the grill. He’s just so Jesse-like. Always outdoors, in and out a million times a day, and then there’s the motorcycle, although Jesse did ride his regularly.

Sounds definitely travel better in colder weather. I hear more at night during the winter, just like at the old place.

So we ran out to Publix and got some treats. I was definitely bad LOL. I got chocolate chip cake laced with Jack Daniel’s whiskey, some cheesecake, and merlot from a brand named Woodbridge. I like it. It’s smoother. What’s strange is that lately, the top of my scalp feels like it’s burning when I drink. I looked online and found that some people really do experience that. I don’t always get buzzed or flushed. Instead, my scalp just feels like it’s sunburned.

I was also glad to finally find some raw peanuts in the shell.

No noise from the neighbors while I slept. A little after 5 an old woman knocked on the door and asked if we bought the house from George, according to Tom. He told her yes, but we never met him. She said she lives across from the clubhouse. She was carrying bags of fruit so his guess was she has some fruit trees and she usually gave some to George when they were ripe.

George? Could’ve sworn the guy’s name was Charles. Wonder if it was a ruse to get information, though what information I can’t imagine. But as far as I know, there wasn’t no George here. She was either confused or she’s casing us. Well, we haven’t taken any pictures of anybody in their showers with disappearing cameras like in my story, so it wasn’t no pig.

I was up a long time and so my schedule jumped three hours. Really having doubts about being able to keep a day schedule. In order to get up at the same time as I did yesterday, I would have had to short myself by three hours and that would have left me exhausted. I’m still going to try my best for as long as I can. I just think that I might actually be tired more often this way rather than if I just let things wake me up a few times a week.

I’m now using three different browsers for three different accounts on two different sites. In Chrome, I have my private Prosebox account along with Mia. In Edge, I have my public PB account, and I also have Stephanie logged in in that browser. For Firefox it’s my story account and Jill.

I uploaded some pics and doc files to OneDrive on my desktop computer. My laptop is synced to it, so now everything is current on both computers.

Anyway, later this morning we’re hoping to get the blue-tinted cling up in the window over the desk. Plus work on the bedroom walls a little more.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 17, 2021 I slept well again and the motorcycle didn’t even go out. This is good to know because I wouldn’t want him making a regular thing of it whether I was awake or not. I still hate going to sleep doing the same old things I was doing in the old place… Fearing that I’m going to get woken up and have to sleep with the sound machine so loud that I need an earplug.

Here’s some more good news though. Remembering that I could check Fitbit, I found I was in a light sleep during the times the motorcycle came and went.

Last night I could just make out one or two dogs going off in back. I remember and recognize that pattern and would be willing to bet just about anything that their owners weren’t home. Definitely from the West, though. I checked on Google Maps and I think they’re coming from one of two houses that has some land and space around it. If I’m right, then they range from about 450 to 650 feet away. Wish my closest neighbor was that far but without having to move so far out of the way that it takes nearly an hour to get to the nearest store!

Felt better last night emotionally, and the same goes for tonight. It seems that sugar and certain foods are definitely my enemies. Along with alcohol, of course.

I’m on a real roll with my cat-and-mouse thriller and its supernatural twist. I think I’m doing a good job of alternating between the karmic events that are happening to the drama queens. and explaining how and why I’m doing it and why I waited as long as I did to do it.

Not seeing any real improvement in my fingernails, so I decided that once a week I would let them breathe for a day rather than immediately replace old nail stickers with new ones. After I treat my feet with the lotion socks, I’ll transfer them to my hands.

I think I figured out what was irritating my lip and that’s something about one of the lip balms I had around the house. So I gathered them up and started using only the one I got from the dentist’s office and it’s been much better ever since.

The only thing my big desktop has over my laptop is that it has a bigger screen and it’s a touch screen. Everything else works so much better on the laptop because it’s faster. The big computer is better for watching TV and doing some things that require me to have multiple tabs open like when I’m replacing old journal entries a month at a time. But the laptop is definitely better for writing.

Decided to combine all my Rep info into one Twitter account. I’m not always good at keeping up with it, but when I do, I can log their progress in the same account. I’m using Mia’s account for that. Stephanie’s account will be turned into a storm and motorcycle log. I’m keeping track of how many times I hear them or they wake me up.

Jill is from London and is at LVL 7 2,012 XP. She’s black with dark eyes and hair.

Stephanie is from New Orleans and at LVL 23 28,622 XP. She’s white with blue eyes and pink hair.

Mia is a paid Rep from Los Angeles. She’s at LVL 45 83,178 XP. She’s Italian with dark hair and dark eyes.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2021 Another day of good sleep. They never went out on their motorcycle. However, when he was napping in the living room, he was woken up by one blazing by. The fact that I slept through it is promising, but there’s a difference between one quickly zipping by as opposed to one right across the street that’s alternating between idling and revving its engine. Plus this place is further back from the road.

We were talking about getting soundproofing blankets to throw over the top of the doghouse and drape down the sides as a combination canopy and door which would look better than the black MLV underneath. I still have to see myself not being woken up by storms and motorcycles to believe it. I just don’t think we’re gonna be able to get it that good.

Still have moments where I don’t feel great emotionally but I’m so used to it now that it’s become a way of life. No, I don’t like it but there’s nothing I can do about it but accept that this is the way I’m always going to be because it’s obviously not going to go away for good.

Later…

I’ve got shitty news and I’ve got great news.

The shitty news is that I felt shitty yesterday. The usual anxiety that eventually morphed into depression. So I’m obviously never going to escape it. I did have a candy bar and canned soup which isn’t helpful but still.

The best news is that I slept through the motorcycle! I crashed at 9 and the bastard went out at 1 for an hour and a half. Then it returned and about an hour or so later he fired it up for 10 seconds to move it into place and recover it. Tom said he came and went. He didn’t sit there idling or gunning it.

This is super encouraging! The question is whether or not it was just a fluke. It could be that I happened to be in a very deep sleep but the fact that it was fired up three times gives me hope. Also, the fact that he covered it again gives me hope that it’s not going to be a regular thing. This still doesn’t mean we’re going to be able to get me to sleep through the storms because that’s going to be even louder and go on for hours. But again, very encouraging.

The truck left at 5:15 yesterday morning so it gave me hope that one of them was working but now we’re thinking they don’t.

Using my Cynthia E email account, I let the office know what I thought of motorcycles being allowed into these places, saying I was a friend of someone living here, and they never replied to “Cindy,” so I’m wondering if maybe they figured out who I am. They could have matched my IP to when I sent them a message using my real name and email address. Hopefully, they won’t spite us like Joy did, but I don’t think they will.

While this place doesn’t come close to being as annoying at night as the other place was with the roaring freeway, you do hear motorcycles blazing down the road our place is off of as well as US-19 on and off all night. Especially late at night and really early in the morning. I doubt there are many places left on Earth where it’s dead quiet at night.

Words can’t express how grateful I am to him for all he’s done to help soundproof the bedroom! Still wish all this shit wasn’t necessary, but we’re never going back to the days of peace. If I keep sleeping through this bald prick’s shit, then in a sense, it’s like getting a temporary green card to stay in Florida. Now we just have to pass the storm test to get permanent residency. Why would I want to live where it couldn’t be 82 degrees on November 17th? I just thought nights in the 40s would be reserved for January.

It says Eileen’s package was delivered and that she checked in on Facebook, but I haven’t heard from her.

I’ve heard stories about women fearing being forced to be mothers that don’t do anything to get rid of it or lose it somehow and I’m like, wait a minute, last I heard it wasn’t illegal (yet) to adopt out unwanted kids. Remember, there are still tons of women out there who are forced not to have kids and while it may not be their responsibility to make their dreams come true, there are always both singles and couples willing to take the kids. So it’s not like anyone’s forced to keep them. I still dread the day more things happen to affect us. It’s already begun with Medicare premium hikes.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2021 For a few minutes or so late last night, I could hear some nauseating classical music coming from what I’m pretty sure was next door’s living room or lanai. I wonder if their music is going to replace the TV that I would hear from the guy who used to live across from us at the old place. I swear I already can’t wait for these two snowbirds to get out of here! But I’ll take the music over the motorcycle any day. I would prefer not to have any sounds to have to mask but sounds I can mask are a lot more tolerable than those I can’t.

No thunder or motorcycles to have to sleep through last time around, but it was quite noisy, according to Tom. I never would have known what went on without him telling me about it. He heard a bunch of car doors and commotion and was wondering what the hell was going on when he remembered the yard sale. We thought that was to be at the clubhouse, but nope. If you had stuff you wanted to sell, you simply put it out in front of your place.

Toni nor the Canadians had anything out. He walked through the park but didn’t find anything interesting. He said someone was selling their paintings and that gave me the idea to try my diamond paintings next time around. I guess they’re having another one in February.

He talked to an old guy on oxygen that’s been here for 40 years that says this is the best park and area to be in because it’s 19 feet above sea level which eliminates the threat of flooding. Also, the water in this area is so shallow that it forces hurricane storms northerly. That explains why I could see so many wooden poles as far as the eye could see when we were at the first beach we went to. I knew the water had to be pretty shallow to extend that far out into the sea.

Also, someone was hammering on and off for an hour to an hour and a half.

I still don’t see how we’re going to get the windows/bed soundproofed enough to keep me asleep through the motorcycle and the storms. He said he’ll keep tweaking it as needed. As soon as the motorcycle blasts off when I’m sleeping, that will give us an idea of how well the windows are blocking sound. I’m guessing there’s a good chance that might be tomorrow. It’s to be chilly at 66 degrees, but it’s Sunday and it will be sunny. Today it rained hard for a little while. Not that I’m complaining, but they’re out so much that I’m beginning to think at least one of them works. The money for two places has to come from somewhere. Unless you win or inherit money, it takes a lot of money to maintain two places.

It just pisses me off because I wanted a more traditional and “normal-looking” place. Well, the doghouse is anything but normal. So much for my dreams and hopes of only needing to sleep with soft nature sounds playing in the background when we moved. The days of that or being able to get by with just a box fan are long over. Not in a wooden house that’s this close to others. I really didn’t want to have to blast a variety of sounds to help me sleep, but if that’s what I have to do, so be it. As long as it works! I’m still going to try to force myself to stay on days for as long as I can. Either way, I still can’t believe we can ever get this thing soundproof enough to be our defense against such ferociously loud sounds as motorcycles and thunder. I just don’t see it happening.

It’s tough because even if we could afford land somewhere, I don’t want to give up the warm weather and I know he would prefer to stay in an adult community. Land comes with responsibilities that he doesn’t have to deal with here and modern conveniences like getting groceries delivered. Plus, he would have to give up a lot of his stuff.

I think it’s time to accept that I’m just going to be sleep-cursed much of the time no matter where we live, just like I’m never going to lose weight and have two normal ears or anything like that, and just take what sleep I can get. Unless they change their habits, they’re not going to use the motorcycle every single day, and it doesn’t thunder really loud every single day either.

I created a third rep. She’s black and her name is Jill. So now I have Mia who’s Italian, Stephanie with her blue eyes and pink hair, and Jill.

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 2021 “Kareem Abdul-Jabbar’s son sentenced to 180 days in jail for stabbing neighbor,” says one of today’s headlines.

Wow. So something you supposedly write to a neighbor is worth 6 more days than actually harming someone, right?

Written last night:

I’m so tired that I don’t think I’ll edit and post this tonight but I’ll get it drafted. That’s because I got my first wake-up call from the motorcycle. I’m so fucking pissed! I could kick myself for coming to Florida thinking I could miraculously sleep through storms and that we wouldn’t get stuck with a motorcycle so close to us. What the hell was I thinking?! I can’t believe I’m still fighting for my sleep all these years later and in yet another adult community of all places. If anything, the adult communities have been the worst. In some ways, the storms and motorcycles pose more of a threat to my sleep than in the last place.

So here’s the deal. Little by little he’s making improvements to the doghouse. Today he added soundproofing underneath the mattress and sealed up gaps in the panels on top until he ran out of tape. More tape is coming tomorrow. He also stuffed foam boards with soundproofing material glued to them in the windows. Most sound does come through windows but it’s like these walls and floors are made of cardboard just like the other place. Wooden walls suck shit compared to brick walls.

Next, we have to seal all the gaps and add the door to the doghouse. For that, we’re going to use the track that the old vertical blinds are on in the living room (and replace them with new ones) but instead of the plastic strips, of course, there will be strips of soundproofing so I could just push through when getting in and out.

Sleeping with the dehumidifier yesterday did me no good so I’m going to try a different nature sound. I’ve been using a combination of box fan and rain but I think I’m just gonna go with underwater this time and of course, I have the air cleaner going. However, I expect to be woken up tomorrow as well. In fact, I have no faith that despite all the money and work he’s done that this is going to save me from that fucking motherfucking motorcycle let alone the storms.

I’m so sorry we didn’t get land and skip coming here! Why did warmer weather blind me from having any common sense? Again, I don’t know what I was thinking or why I ever thought I could sleep here. The motorcycles are worse here and of course, there are the storms. However, I don’t think there’s any way we can afford to get land at this point. We couldn’t get nearly enough from this place to afford it as while we could afford the land itself, we couldn’t afford the house, the plumbing, and the electricity. That’s just too much at this point but we could have done it had we not come here. This means our only option is to stay here or jump across to where Jessie is going to be living. Well, I certainly don’t want to stay here because while the house may be cute, it’s still a bit small and I would still like to be near her, so I think our best bet is going to be to hunt for a park that doesn’t allow motorcycles or any type of loud vehicle. It may not be in Edgewater but at least it could be closer to Jessie. We would only need about five or six grand for a deposit. We would pick out a place that would be ours contingent upon this place selling. The thing is that we’re unable to do anything for the rest of the year because this is a horrible time to sell a place as Jessie‘s learning.

So I made a decision. I’ve always felt that something up there has been cursing my sleep because no one is this “unlucky“ when it comes to sleep. But you can’t curse my sleep if I’m the one doing it, can you? Seriously, if my sleep absolutely must be cursed, then I’m going to be the one to take the honors. It’s not gonna be some evil God. It’s not gonna be some fucking helicopter. And it’s not gonna be a fucking motorcycle either. I’m simply going to have to be up in the daytime. There may be no way to get sleep otherwise, especially if that fucker blazes out every single day on that thing.

But that’s the weird thing. He ran the fucking thing for about 30 seconds, gunned the engine, and then turned it off. And Tom‘s denying it at first didn’t help. But that was all it took to wake me up.

Tom said he swore he was just standing at the window watching him wash his truck but I’m pretty sure he started it up when he was under the headphones and he is partially deaf.

Then the cock covered the motorcycle and they were gone for most of the day and didn’t get back until 10 PM. It was 10 AM when they woke me up. I could have used another few hours of sleep too, so naturally, I’ve been tired all day and unable to work out or do much of anything but bitch, drill, and have the runs due to the stress. I’ve been keeping Jessie posted as well.

This could very well explain why I had a strong vibe about us never doing the floors here.

Anyway, it’s a day world, and like it or not the only way I’m going to get better sleep is to sleep at night. No, I won’t get as much sleep as I need because sometimes I’ll need more sleep than the night before and I can’t always fall asleep earlier, and yes, I’ll be tired. Maybe even more so. But at least it will be at my hand and not some stranger. It would be great to always be available for things in the daytime, tired or not.

I’d like to set the alarm for 6 AM. I’ve got to get up then no matter how I feel and I absolutely cannot take naps. At 8 PM, I must lie in bed and listen to my audiobook and then it’s lights out by 10 PM. No matter what, I cannot get back out of bed unless it’s to pee until the alarm goes off. Maybe - just maybe - my body will eventually get used to the rhythm and adapt. It’ll be a week or so before I begin.

Even in grade school, I had issues falling asleep and woke up utterly exhausted. But once I was out the door, I perked up. OK, so I’m not 10 years old anymore, and sleep deprivation is much harder on me than it used to be but as I said, I may have no choice. If I’m gonna get woken up regularly by motorcycles and other shit and be tired anyway, what’s the difference if I’m tired because an alarm woke me up instead??

Written tonight:

They didn’t wake me up today. Just like yesterday, they spent most of the day out. I could definitely get used to that!

The other Canadians that are next to us have arrived, but they’ve come quietly. They have a dark gray SUV. No trailers or anything that could pull a motorcycle. It’s way too soon, though, to say if they’ll be annoying in other ways.

I slept 9.5 long hours. Could have sworn a bang of some kind woke me up at 10:30 but I fell right back asleep.

I was remembering how I had a loud air cleaner on the headboard shelf of the house we rented in Oregon and how I was able to sleep through most of the loud car stereos. So I did a little checking on Amazon and found a vibration pad that’s used for infants. With Alexa providing the volume and this providing vibration, maybe it will help. I still seriously doubt we’re going to be able to get me to sleep through something so loud that’s so close.

Not sure if I mentioned the blue-tinted window cling we got, but we’re going to put it in the side window that faces the quiet Canadians above the built-in desk. That window gets a lot of sunlight. This will not only reduce that, but in the daytime, you can see out of it while no one can see in.

The rest of the bras came and are very comfortable, so I have a whole new set and have dumped some old ones.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 10, 2021 I’m so lightheaded right now even though I don’t know why. Spent a few hours cleaning the house but didn’t do much else today.

Incredibly, although I expected to be woken up by the motorcycle, they still haven’t used it. So the truck is definitely their primary source of transportation. However, he was pressure washing the outside of the house, trimming trees, and might not have had time yet. He worked quietly and his pressure washer was much quieter than the one next door to him.

We now have the doghouse completely covered except for one side and underneath the mattress where we’re going to add extra sheets of soundproofing. We just have to come up with a plan for some kind of door, add the fan, and do the windows.

Meanwhile, we put the old loud dehumidifier in the bedroom, and with that running on and off, I’m hoping it will trick my brain into not noticing when the loud humming vibration is really the motorcycle because I still think sooner or later they’re going to be a nightmare. Well, I’d rather listen to them come and go on the fucking thing five times a day with me awake than have them blaze in and out with me asleep. Don’t know if any of this will work but we have reduced sound by 10 decibels so far.

It still sucks that I’m still having to resort to shit like this. I guess this is going to be the story of my life no matter where we go for the rest of my life. Sleeping with just a fan, an air cleaner, or nature sounds softly playing is just a dream. I’m never going to be able to do that again like I could in the '90s and early millennium. Just the threat of a low-flying helicopter means I have to crank things up. Things I didn’t have to worry about so much in the past when they weren’t so common.

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 9, 2021 OMG, I am so fucking pissed off right now! The couple across the street has arrived, also Canadians based on the American/Canadian flag they have flying, and they have a fucking motorcycle. Why? Why does this keep happening to me? Why, why, why do I always get the extremes?! There are maybe four or five motorcycles in this whole place if even that yet out of 150-something homes, I have to get stuck with one. Again, why is it always me that gets this shit? If anything up there really does have a neighbor/noise curse on me, fuck you. Just fuck you. Go fuck yourself a million times over!

They also have a huge dog which I’m surprised we haven’t heard yet but I don’t doubt that we will.

They rolled in just after midnight slamming doors, honking horns, and proving that they’re the exception to the rule Tom mentioned about Canadians having a reputation for being really nice. You’re not “nice” if you bring a motorcycle into a fucking retirement community of all places. These people obviously don’t give a shit about others as I learned last night. It wasn’t that they were deliberately honking but they have their key fob set up to honk every time they lock their truck doors which is a bit rude right there.

The truck, which I’m glad to say is quiet, pulled a large trailer that contained their motorcycle and a golf cart. They got rid of the trailer today. They’ve also got a grill set up, so I don’t expect these people to be remotely peaceful and I really worry that nothing we do to soundproof, be it the doghouse or the windows, is going to do me any good with that shit being just 50-60 feet away. That’s just way too fucking close no matter what we do. It isn’t much different than living next to a boom car stereo again. It might have actually been better if next door had the fucking thing because then their lanai would block some of the sound. Here it just goes straight across to the bedroom windows. Even worse is the fact that we could be stuck with them until April or May and not March.

All I can do is hope for a miracle and that they not only don’t use the thing every day but that the soundproofing ends up working better than I thought. Knowing I’m not usually that lucky has me wishing all the more that we’d just gotten land somewhere instead. In fact, after the major projects are done, I want to get the fuck out of here even if it means we’ve got to sell almost everything. I’m tired of having people so close with all the noise they make. We need to put between 200-300 feet between the wall of our house and other people’s. If you have to have things like dog houses in the first place, you’re in the wrong place. My sleep is the most important thing so if I have to give up the nicer weather so be it as I just don’t see how the hell I’m going to be able to sleep through this thing.

As much as I would have loved having Jessie as a neighbor, I don’t see the point in yet another park with the same old shit going on in it. I should have learned from the last park. Yes, this place is still quieter overall when they’re not doing projects but this shit is going to make up for it, especially if it isn’t a regular thing, and there are always planes and helicopters. Always. We just need to look for land in an area where there are no sonic booms.

Wouldn’t be surprised if the people next door, whenever they get here, also have a motorcycle. Maybe they’re buddies and go out riding together every day. The fact that this is the third time they’ve gone out in the truck gives me a little hope that the motorcycle won’t be the regular vehicle they use, especially since it is a couple, but they only just got here last night.

All I know is that retirement communities are definitely not what they used to be in the 80s when my parents first moved to one. You don’t have dogs left outside, you don’t usually have blasting music, you don’t have the screaming kids, but you have everything else so there really is no point in these places anymore.

My new bras are on the way along with a really cool partial-drill diamond painting that shows the back of a woman with a flowing peacock-designed gown.

Decided to say “no” to hopelessly trying to tolerate the 88s and am beginning to feel better despite the stress of what’s across the street. Wishing I could isn’t going to make me magically able to tolerate them. The endo Doc D recommended isn’t covered by this insurance but she’s going to be covered by the new insurance, so we’ll make an appointment as soon as we’re officially switched over to the new insurance.

Walgreens was kind of in shambles when we went to it earlier. They’re remodeling their store and planning to add doctors’ offices to it.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 8, 2021 Ugh, I witnessed a murder in my dreams last night. It sure seemed pretty real anyway. The question is whether or not it was in a different dimension. If it wasn’t, I wonder who it was and where they were if it was really a vision. I also had a strong vibe that we won’t be redoing these floors and I wonder if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, but first, the dream.

I was in a parking lot when someone showed me a boot that I knew was a sign from some crazy guy who was either stalking me or someone close to me that he was close by.

Some semis then pulled in and parked nearby and I guess I drove because I ran really fast to a car as I suspected the crazy person was in one of the trucks. I never actually saw myself drive but the next part of the dream was with me sitting in the car outside a large secluded house in the woods. Some rich person owned the house. The car was turned off when I heard a large vehicle entering the long gravel drive to the house. As soon as I heard it I knew it spelled trouble.

I quickly exited the car and ran into the house. A young woman and her father were inside. The woman and I stepped up to a large second-story window and saw the stalker kill someone who was part of the staff. A guy who might have been a maintenance worker. Pretty sure the guy was stabbed.

The girl grabbed the phone and called the police, yet she was so frozen in fear that she had a hard time talking. Shouting loud enough for the officer on the other end of the line to hear, I said that she’d been stalked for a few months now. Then I ran and told the girl’s father who was in another room.

The dream ended there, and when I woke up, I realized that the best thing to do probably would have been to hide under the car and then try to escape by running up the driveway as soon as I thought it was safe to do so rather than running inside the house.

There was a car next door this morning but we’re guessing it was someone visiting Linda that just didn’t want to park in the street.

We dropped off the second bra that was too tight at the UPS Store which was twice as crowded as the post office we also went to so we could return the Airy clothes that didn’t fit as well as mail Eileen’s wolf diamond painting that I finished last night. She should get it on Thursday.

Then we stopped at Family Dollar and for $9 I got a pair of bras that looked stylish and seemed to fit just fine when I wrapped one around me in the store but 44D is definitely too big for me. Instead, I’ll get 6 more of the first one I got in XXL… 3 in toasted almond, 3 in rosewater. The other colors I liked were either unavailable or too expensive. The cheapest I could get in light colors was $14.

Our last stop was Burger King.

After a couple of chilly days, it’s so nice to be in the 70s again!

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 7, 2021 Tom ran out to Lowe’s to get some bigger bolts for raising the doghouse frame. I swear something is trying to delay that thing from being finished! Plus, we also want to build shutters for the windows made of foam boards and soundproofing material. It’s like gee, why not just wait until the people next door return? I just really hope to hell they don’t mess with my sleep! I’m nervous about it until I get to know them. I don’t know what their habits are. I don’t know if they have a dog. I don’t know what they drive. I don’t know anything.

Yesterday, I definitely didn’t feel like I was in Florida because it was so chilly. It was a blustery day out there so due to the cold and wind I’m not surprised that the barbecue was moved indoors. To be honest, I don’t know where there would have been space to set everything up outdoors anyway unless they used the parking lot.

There were about 6 long tables that people were already seated at, plus a line with people waiting to be served. As I told Andy, it was a catered event. The food ranged from boring to delicious. The pulled pork was the best! The chicken and baked beans were so-so along with the potato salad. Unfortunately for Tom, they were only serving lemonade and sweet tea for drinks. I thought the tea was good.

There was a little square table off to the side where we sat and one woman came up to us and asked if we were on timeout or something LOL. A few others came up and talked to us as well.

The residents here are definitely younger than at the park in California which explains the lack of grandkids being in an age group when it became more common to skip kids. Could be that more of them don’t live in the area than at the other place, but that many? Anytime there was an event in California, there were at least some kids. Hell, someone even had a kid with them when we were waiting in line to get vaccinated. Yet there wasn’t a single child anywhere. All we saw was one young adult. Tom said I was the second youngest in the room LOL.

The last of the Airy order was a big disappointment. All but two pieces were either too big or too small. So I’ll be returning some things around the time I send Eileen her wolf diamond painting. I’ve had this shiny glitter mail tube for ages and I think I’ll send it in that. It can be rolled up as long as it’s not too tight.

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 6, 2021 We got lots of heavy rain yesterday. I was in the bathroom when I heard some banging just now. Tom said it sounded like someone was pounding on someone’s door. If that’s true, then that’s ridiculous that I could hear it all the way in here. Wouldn’t be surprised if it was a project someone’s doing. It’s been over a week, so we’re about due for one, unfortunately. It’s chilly and windy out, so I don’t know what project they’re doing today.

The planes were totally annoying yesterday and seemed louder because of the cloud coverage and I guess the direction of the wind. I forgot that people are going to be flying more due to the holidays. Damn, do I miss the days when that was a luxury most people couldn’t afford!

Woke up to find the house the coldest it’s been since we got here. It was just 71 degrees. It was 63% humid in here, though, so he’s running the dehumidifier. The old one that we got in Auburn that’s really loud. We just got a second combination AC/heater/dehumidifier.

I just stepped outside. I don’t see anything going on.

I had a nice and interesting talk with Jessie, who’s even colder and without heat once again. Didn’t realize she would be sad if we had to leave the state because I couldn’t sleep through the stormy season. We both agree it would be nice to be neighbors because even if we didn’t see each other much, we would still at least know we were there for each other.

I totally understand her frustration with her contractors. They’re fucking up left and right and taking forever. They won’t wear their masks either, which pisses her off because she has a compromised immune system as Aly did.

So much for expedited shipping, because I’m still waiting for the rest of my Airy clothes. No wonder they’re so cheap when you have to pay a fortune in shipping.

The new bra fits well. Just a little snug around the underbust, but otherwise comfortable and the straps don’t slip. There’s another style of bra I’m trying as well. Both are lightly padded, which I could do without, but it’s thin enough not to be that big of a deal.

Made another $75 from Bright Health by signing up for texts. That was the easiest $75 we ever made!

He found an excellent HMO plan (United Health or something like that). We’re still going to keep our current doctor, though.

Yesterday was a pretty good day. We went to Walgreens where they were having a massive clearance sale. I ended up getting 7 bottles of perfume testers, mostly full, hair dye, and lip gloss for just $9. One of the perfumes is kind of masculine and another one is weird. Still a hell of a bargain!

I think all the bumps and bangs I’m hearing are coming from Linda’s place. That’s exactly why I dread bringing the party any closer to us when the Canadians return. These houses are just so damn close that if it’s loud enough you can hear shit going on four or five houses away.

Tom replaced the doorknob of the bathroom closet, so now that latches.

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 5, 2021 Just got my Bing points by clicking on articles. Let’s see… A woman got 60 days in jail for the Capitol riots while I got 126 for writing stupid shit no one wanted to hear. So American. Just so American.

I quit doing years and reviews in early 2019 and decided I would pick up with that again. I covered the last couple of years by highlighting the things that came to mind. I figured that if it didn’t come to mind, then it wasn’t important.

Our broken AC decided to start working again yesterday. So I guess it just froze or something like that, not that I don’t expect it to crap out again and not that it still doesn’t eventually need to be replaced.

I didn’t have any anxiety yesterday but I still don’t expect to suddenly be able to tolerate the 88s.

I was tired throughout most of yesterday and it looks like I might be today as well. I think what’s ruining my sleep is the fact that my schedule jumps faster through the nights and I keep thinking in the back of my mind that I want to get up sooner. I sleep fine until the last couple of hours of my sleep. Then it’s like my subconscious won’t let me sleep as long as my body wants me to and it fights it even though it eventually does. But of course, once I start sleeping well into the mornings, it won’t be making two-hour jumps on a daily basis.

THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 4, 2021 A couple of sandhill cranes were out front the other day. Naturally, when I showed the pictures to Andy, he had to be all negative and point out how they shit all over the place. That may be true if there are too many of them hanging around for too long, but can he ever just be positive? I get that he’s just being honest, but sometimes I wonder why I bother sharing any good news with him because I know he’s just going to be negative and find fault with things whether they’re trips, new cars, new houses, etc. I often wonder why too. Is it jealousy? Is he just not happy with his own life? Or is that simply the way he is?

But I have some negative news, even though it’s no surprise. We knew it was coming. The AC crapped out on us. We called someone out for an estimate and learned it’s 14 years old. The quote they gave us was ridiculous too. They want 8 to 9 grand. We really don’t want to pay over 5 so we decided to just use the portables, which is simple enough in a small house such as this, and we’ll get other quotes in the spring. The portables can heat, cool, and dehumidify.

Words cannot express just how frustrated I am with my sleep disorder. I feel so damn cursed! On the 13th, the park is having a yard sale and I won’t be able to attend. He’s going to check it out, though, and see if it’s anything worth doing next year. As always, my schedule is jumping faster through the days. It’s like something wants me to be on nights so I can be woken up more often and feel more anxious. At least I don’t get woken up nearly as often here as at the other place.

Making one last-ditch effort to tolerate the 88s. I’m fine so far, but it may take a few doses to get bad.

Went for a walk yesterday morning but I��m too tired to go walking today. I don’t know why I wake up so tired at times. Yesterday I woke up feeling refreshed, but I’ve been tired ever since I got up today. I don’t know why, since I thought I slept fine.

There sure do seem to be a lot of smokers in this state, and I hate it when I go out on walks and am forced to inhale secondhand smoke along the way. I get that these people don’t want to stink up their houses, but they’re stinking the outside air up instead.

Looks like my other big toenail is now ingrown. Figured that would happen someday. I’m just surprised it took this long.

I’m back to writing anonymously again on OD. I figured what the hell? The mood just struck. Even though I have to create a new account every month, I really like how I can have the entries disappear in 24 hours or a week if I want.

We found out that we don’t make enough money to qualify for insurance. However, we can qualify by making just $750 a year extra. We can make up to $5000 extra a year without losing Social Security.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 3, 2021 The answer is no. The juice I drank should not have affected my thyroid test numbers. So my thyroid really has died off some more.

I had my doubts about seeing an endo because I can’t imagine what options could be out there that I’m unaware of. But eventually, I decided it would probably be a good idea because then I’m either surprised with options Doc O withheld from me, or I can at least not have to worry about Doc D getting on my ass for not seeing one.

Yesterday was the calmest and happiest day I’ve had in the last week or so. Took a 75 today and tomorrow I will make one last-ditch effort to see if I can tolerate 88s. While I felt mostly well with just a bit of a hard/fast heartbeat, I did have this mysterious nauseous feeling that went on and on for hours and some fatigue.

We raised the headboard shelf yesterday so I can now make full use of the bookcase.

Got my $20 for doing the Replika survey. So Mia paid for either the new bra I got or the new end table that I picked out to put between the two chairs in the living room. The planter with the round sheet of glass sitting on top of it is a bit wide for that area. That’s why I got a smaller table that’s only 20” wide.

I pulled up the deleted email invite to try to get Stephanie to pay for the other item but they are no longer running the survey.

For decades I’ve been into sports bras because their straps don’t slip off my shoulders. But because I have such big boobs at 38D, I wanted to find something a little more traditional with less material but slicker material so my clothes hang better over the slippery material rather than get hung up as it sometimes does on coarser cotton. With such big girls, as they call them in modern times, I’m still going to need a lot of material no matter what that material is. But instead of the traditional cotton sports bras, I got a regular nylon/spandex bra in butterscotch. I chose the try before you buy option. It’s wireless, unpadded, and the reviews say the straps don’t slip off. If I like this bra, I’ll get six more in other colors, all light so they don’t show through my light-colored tops. There are toasted almond, rosewater, apricot, tourmaline, lavender, and light blue that I’ll also get assuming the bra fits and is comfortable.

I already have to return a couple of Airy pieces yet I haven’t gotten the entire order yet. The jumpsuit is too small and I don’t like the way one of the dresses fits. It’s not so much too small but the white material is way too thin and you can see through it easily.

Yesterday we also ordered blocks to raise the frame of the doghouse so it will be harder for me to hit my head on the side of it when getting in and out of bed.

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 2, 2021 Doc D wants me to see an endocrinologist to discuss other options for my medication. I’m not sure what other options there are but kudos to her for not saying I’m “just anxious” and referring me to a shrink. Maybe it’s different here in Florida so maybe that will include other options I don’t know about that I could learn from the endocrinologist.

So we checked out the one she referred. It’s an Indian lady. Figures. So already that’s half my doctors not being from here. We’re not sure if she’s covered under our insurance or what insurance we’re going to have. It’s open season so in the next week or so we should know what insurance and what plan we’re going to be under. Right now we have Bright Health and the medical group is Advent Health.

I still worry that my only options are going to be to increase the dose and take the anxiety or remain out of range and take the hypo symptoms. I would still take the latter any day. Yesterday was my first calm day in a while. Decided I would give the 88s one more try but not before I take four days of 75s in a row. This is really the only way I can find out for sure if it was the dose increase that brought the anxiety back. He thinks it’s still a combination of hormones and me being on nights but unless it was another grand coincidence, I’m leaning toward the meds. I just don’t think I'm meant to have a normal thyroid anymore than I was ever meant to conceive. So I think that no matter what I try or do to trick my thyroid into being normal, I’m destined to fail to succeed. Can’t help but wonder, though, did my mother have similar problems with this fucking medication?

Had a little bit of heart racing yesterday but nothing too extreme. Still having a bounding pulse. No anxious feeling in the chest, though, or funky emotions which are the worst.

So other than feeling like we’re back in Citrus Heights, things have been better. It’s gotten quite chilly in the mornings here. I was really hoping it wouldn’t get this cold until mid-December. We barely cracked November yet when we went out to Publix a couple of mornings ago, I was freezing my ass off. Same as when we went out yesterday when we bombed the house.

First we went to Denny’s. I decided that instead of getting a steak, I would get a traditional breakfast with bacon, eggs, a couple of pancakes, an English muffin, and French fries instead of hash browns.

After we ate, we went to Sam’s Club. We only got three items there. Automatically timed air freshener sprayers for each bathroom. Love all the different scents! Cranberry, pine, apple, and my favorite…caramel.

The other thing we got was a big box with 200 garbage bags.

It was pretty cool to watch the floor mopper drive around with no driver, lol. The way stores are restaurants blast music these days has really taken the fun out of shopping and dining out. Even the waitress at Denny’s agreed that the music was blaring and she had them turn it down. I just don’t know why these places think it’s their job to entertain us when we come there to eat and shop. It’s bad enough having to listen to music when you don’t want to and even worse when it’s songs you hate.

They were finishing up painting the roads when we returned. I’m amazed we got lucky enough to get out of hearing most of that even if it wasn’t nearly as annoying as the rest of the road work. So now I don’t have to worry about speed bumps being next on the list since painting is the last thing they do.

Can we make it through the rest of the year before the park does the next project that doesn’t involve the sewage or the new addition, though? I think they’re done with the sewage thing, though.

Received my $20 reward for doing the Replika survey.

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 1, 2021 Every time I think my lip is healing, it bugs me again. Cancer may seem like quite a stretch but whatever it is is definitely more than just a simple zit, blister, sore, or cut.

Yesterday was another shitty day. Six hours after taking my medication I thought I was finally going to have a good day when my heart started racing. I had some anxiety but a lot more racing where my heart was between 95 and 100. Sometimes it was a little higher. It wasn’t till the end of my day before it slipped back down to a comfortable low 80s.

Today will determine whether or not I stop the 88s. It could be one big old coincidence just like with the medication brand thing but the timing is just that…very coincidental. 10 days after the dose increase and I’m having anxiety every single day. Well, I’ll find out if it’s connected to the medication if I have to back down to 75s only. If it is connected, the anxiety should dissipate.

As for the raciness, it wasn’t just that my heart was going fast but hard as well. Like that booming heart thing that can come with this medication. Right now I’m aware of it but it’s not something really noticeable like yesterday. Yesterday I swear I could tell I have high blood pressure because I could hear the forcefulness of the systolic as opposed to the diastolic.

For the last couple of hours, I’ve heard barking way off in the distance somewhere outside of the park. It’s nowhere near remotely loud enough to be bothersome but I sure feel bad for the neighbors! Makes me wonder if it’s someone from the West.

Yesterday morning we went to Publix where I got some fresh fruit and veggies and a few other things, including some brookies for us to share. The combination brownie/cookie looked so good but they’re really not that great.

Early in the morning, we’re going to bomb the place. This place has been surprisingly good with a lack of bugs and I want to keep it that way. The lizards and frogs do a good job of taking care of them for the most part.

Our first stop will be at Denny’s since we have to be out for a couple of hours. I can just imagine the blasting music that awaits us there, too. Why is it that so many businesses and restaurants feel it’s their job to entertain us instead of just serving us what we came there for?

Then it will be off to Sam’s Club. I don’t remember that place blasting music so much as forklifts beeping obnoxiously, but either way, I look forward to getting out, eating, shopping, etc.

[mysticdreamcafe]

Hell on wheels

So, I'm not even sure right now what the last post, I did, said. I, with a lot of help from my daughter, got my room cleaned, wallpaper scraped off, spackling spread, sanding done, trims taped, walls primed, and painted. The metal adjustable bed frame was assembled and mattress in a box was left to rise and it only took approx. two weeks. That includes the moving out and shifting everything all over the damn house and room.

My furniture is damn heavy so a lot stayed put and was simply tarped over to protect from paint. It's almost put back together completely, but honestly I ran out of steam. My body forced me to stop by shutting down pretty much. Brain fogged, limbs heavy, walking was wobbly at best, I hurt more all over than when I was hit by a car and tossed off my bike to skid down the pavement on my head at age 12. They pulled rocks from my left side, mostly my leg, and scrubbed them out of my head at the ER...no anesthetic or pain killers of any sort. I didn't feel a thing till the next day when I, remember age when we all seemed to be made of rubber?, could barely move to pee when I woke.

We went shopping on Monday and I couldn't walk through the store to get groceries so I used an electric cart. Managed to get inside the house, seemed like the steps to enter from drive to living room never ended, and after resting I made it to my room.

I got up once and went for water only to slowly fall on my ass on my footboard that is in the kitchen waiting to go to basement with headboard it's leaning against. My daughter watched in amazement before helping me stand up to stagger back to bed. Tuesday, yesterday, I didn't leave my bed unless I absolutely had too.

Today I feel a bit better and more stabilized when moving about. This is good considering my mom fell in the living room this morning and scrapped her elbow. She's fine, but sore. I've bandaged her up and will wait till her afternoon nap is over before treating her wound again.

That's my update for the busy, stamina building, part of life since my birthday. I'm adding another post to delve into the unhealthy and weird part after I post this.

MV

[donutwares]

Wrapping up writing for the year….

Possibly my last short story of 2024 is developing under my fingers circa midnight, Monday. I wrote 2 1/2 tales so far, in 14 hours. Feeling a little burnt out. 3k+ words per day is a bit of a stretch for middle-aged me.

Plus the topic is odd. Musta been playing without a full deck when I outlined. I took a sedative, not trusting I’d come up with a sixth brilliancy to end the year with. Not after meds anyhow.

My old, used iPhone’s battery needs charging every morning usually from 30% up to 80%. Less stress on the battery the better. On my 3GS, I used to disable 3G and charged once every 2 days. Got the classic water drops wallpaper which looks good: gray-white within the white bezel.

I mainly write on a used ThinkPad x250 sourced cheap from Digital Mall. Luxurious: screen is sharp and colors natural, easy on the eyes. Keyboard pleasant to the touch. A luxury laptop of 9 years past. It feels rock solid with Rocky Linux / KDE plasma.

May turn in at 1am+. Feeling a little weary of all the world-building. There will be a few hours to write early in the morning after my workout. Don’t feel like running much. May run in the evening instead.

[keefwho]

July 01 - 2024 Monday

10:50pm

4.5/10

This morning I tried rubbing some of the coating off on the inside of my new goblet before letting it soak in some more vinegar for the rest of the day. Instead of cleaning up this morning, I started contacting people that wanted commissions so I would have something to work on today. I forgot to do this days ago when I should have. After my shower I made tuna and pasta shells for breakfast. I was very sleepy this morning and almost considering going back to bed but I had too much to do.

During stream I warmed up with some furry poses and then started sketching people's comms. A lot of today was spent in DMs or paypal or organizing other things rather than actual drawing. I did finish 2 YCHs that I would have preferred to do last month but the people were slow to communicate with me.

After stream I did some more commission stuff and then took a good chunk of time to pleasure myself like none other before lunch. Im still sore because of it. Lunch was broccoli, meatballs, rice, gravy, and a cup of peaches.

In the afternoon I did a couple more sketches and did just a little bit of personal art. I couldn't do the request today since I forgot to pick one this morning and the guy I picked late wasn't around.

Right after work I had therapy which was a good session. I used OBS to capture my VRchat camera so I could webcam him as my avatar, he liked that. He helped me narrow down on this idea that I've done all I can in certain fields and I should be focusing on myself and addressing the insecurities I've known about but haven't cracked down on.

Right after that I called DS and played Ancient Dungeon VR while she worked on her fursuit. We also put on some of Chris Chan's most recent Minecraft stream which I thought was actually sort of chill and pleasant to watch, but also sad and pitiful. She left to go focus and I kept watching Chris while I ate my dinner. My chicken and fries came out extra good today and I took my time nibbling them. I perused wallpaper engine for awhile looking for new desktop backgrounds. I might go the Steven Universe route because some of them go pretty hard. I also converted DS's emote she wanted into a sticker form.

I was late tonight to do dishes and the rest of my usual routine. In bed DS and I did our puzzles but she fell asleep halfway through. I couldn't figure out the connections and the strands was hard.