#going to figure out any day now that I don't know what I'm doing and I'm not as smart as they think I am
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
abiatackerman · 3 days ago
Text
Mercy of Tiny Ackerman
Tumblr media
❗I don't normally support ai arts but this one seemed so relatable with the story so I'm using this❗
Dad Levi Ackerman X Mom reader! Parenting moments! Fluff and comedy! Dad-Son quality time! 1.8k words!
Summary: Levi, trying his best to act as the best dad and husband because in this world you two are the only people he has now!
Tags: @theremainsof @spouseofleviackerman @levisbrat25 @itsnathateasy @violentvaleska @dreamerofthewest @meowmewow7 @mikabella7 @satorella @sugacor3 @darkstarlight82 @derealizationns
🩷If you wanna be tagged let me know🩷
✨Masterlist✨
🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷
The Ackerman house is quiet now, except for the soft crackling of the fireplace and the occasional creak of the wooden floorboards. The warm, amber glow illuminated the small living room, casting flickering shadows against the walls. Outside, the wind whispered through the trees, a distant hum that only added to the stillness within.
Levi is sitting cross-legged on the floor, his back resting against the couch. His tired eyes softens as he watches the tiny figure sitting before him. His one-year-old son was babbling happily to himself, tiny fingers gripping a toy horse as he clumsily tried to make it "walk" across the blanket.
After claiming the Wall Maria and as everything settled down a little in the Paradise Island... You and Levi didn't waste any time and got married. Within a year this tiny little brat came into this world, lighting up both of your worlds. Also the fact that he's a carbon copy of Levi doesn't help much.... You two can't help yourself but spoil him to no end.
"Hey, I'm home!"
The sound of the front door opening and your familiar voice pulls Levi out of his thoughts. He looks up just as you step into the living room, a tired but warm smile on your face. Without hesitation, you make your way over to where your son is seated, his tiny hands reaching out toward you.
"Was my baby a good boy today?" you ask softly, scooping your son into your arms. You press him close, inhaling his sweet, comforting scent as you hug him tightly. "He didn't give Daddy a hard time, did he?"
Levi leans forward, brushing a light kiss against your cheek in greeting. His expression softens, his usual sharp features tinged with a quiet warmth that’s become more frequent since his son’s arrival.
"As always," Levi says, his lips curving into a small, rare smile. "He behaved like a proper brat."
As if understanding his father's words, your son squeals with delight and reaches his tiny hands toward Levi's hair, his wide grin mirroring his dad's subtle affection. Levi lets out a soft chuckle, tilting his head slightly as their son grabs his hair softly.
Levi watches you with an unspoken fondness, his heart swelling with quiet gratitude. He:s been smiling more these days, he realizes. A lot more. And it's all because of the two of you.
"Thanks for coming home early today, Levi. I was extremely busy today, all blame goes to Hange. And hey kid... Give your attention to mommy now... Daddy's tired!"
You say as you nuzzle with your son, taking him away from Levi.
"Tch don't thank me. I just did what I should do." Levi says as he ruffles his son's hair, "Also I've feed the brat dinner already and was waiting for him to fall asleep but... seems like he has far too much energy."
"Because he's an Ackerman."
You untie your bun, letting your hair cascade down as your son eagerly reaches for it. "Here, you can play with my hair instead of Levi's," you say with a soft smile.
Levi sighs and looks at the little boy in your arms, his expression betraying a mix of pride and amusement. There was no denying it—this was his son, an Ackerman through and through.
"You should go take a shower. I'll take care of him," Levi says softly, extending his arms.
"All right," you reply, stifling a yawn as you stand. "Can you put him to sleep then?"
Levi takes the small child into his arms. The boy coos happily, instantly clutching at Levi's shirt. You smile at the sight and playfully wink at Levi, causing his heart to skip a beat but his face, as always, remains unreadable. He knows once the toddler will fall asleep, you will finally be his again.
"Alright..." Levi mutters with a curt nod, rising to his feet.
The moment Levi stands, your son begins tugging at his dark hair with an excited giggle. You can’t help but laugh softly.
"Seems like he's obsessed with your hair," you tease, brushing a strand of your own out of your face.
Levi scoffs, his lips twitching into what might have been the ghost of a smirk. "Tch. I wonder why."
As the little boy yanks on another lock of hair, Levi gently grabs his tiny hand to stop him, kissing his tiny fist. He takes his son to his room and lay him down in his crib, yet the baby seemed distressed. He grabs onto Levi’s finger and refuses to let go.
Levi tries to pull his finger away to no avail. What was up with this brat's grip? It seems like the child's obsession with his hair extended to his fingers too.
"What's wrong, brat?"
Levi tries to pull his finger away from his son's grip, but to no avail. What is up with this brat's strength? It seems like the child's obsession with his hair has extended to his fingers too.
"What's wrong, brat?" Levi muttered, attempting once again to free his finger. The kid doesn't let go. Instead, he begain to whimper and whine, startling Levi. He never thought he'd see the day when he, Humanity's Strongest, would struggle to get a baby to release his hand.
Levi sighs, giving another gentle tug, but the boy only gripped tighter. Then, the crying started. Panic flickers across Levi's face as he tries to shush his son.
"Tch... don't cry, okay? Fine. You win. You want my finger? It's yours. Shhh… Dad's all yours…"
Levi's words come out awkwardly as he sits on the edge of the crib, surrendering to his tiny captor. The child immediately calms down, a satisfied smile on his face. Levi scoffs—this brat already has him wrapped around his tiny finger, literally and figuratively.
The room fell quiet except for the soft babbling of his son and the sound of running water from the bathroom. That's when it hit Levi.....
You were in there..... Naked......
"Damn it.... Get it together, Ackerman," Levi mutters under his breath, shaking his head.
His heart thumps at the thought. You are still his, the one he married, the one he loves. You are the woman who carried his child, the mother of the little boy currently biting down on his finger.
Levi winces as his son's tiny teeth sinks into his skin again, demanding his attention.
"Tch, what do you want, you little brat?" he grunts, but his voice holds no real irritation.
The child tugs at his finger once more, grinning up at him with wide blue eyes that mirrors Levi's own. Levi feels his heart tighten at the sight. How can something so small make him feel so weak?
After another failed attempt to free himself, Levi lets out a heavy sigh, resigning himself to his fate. "You're just as stubborn as your mother, you know that?" he mutters, glaring half-heartedly at the grinning baby.
Suddenly, your voice broke the quiet. "Hey, Levi~ Is our baby asleep yet?"
Levi's head whips around, and his eyes widened slightly as he sees you standing in the doorway, wearing his favorite nightie. You look stunning, your damp hair framing your face perfectly. But before he could form a proper response, you start laughing.
"Levi," you giggled, "what is this?!"
Levi scowls, feeling humiliated as you pointed at the baby still biting his finger.
"It's our damn brat. He won't let go of me, the brat keeps biting my finger."
You walk over, still chuckling. The sound of your laughter catches the baby's  attention and he finally releases Levi's finger, reaching for you instead.
Levi lets out a relieved sigh, rubbing his sore finger. But his relief was short-lived as jealousy creeps in. The boy wants you now, completely ignoring Levi.
You scoop up you son and cradle him in your arms, your wet hair brushing against your shoulders.
"What's wrong, baby? Your dad fed you, right? Are you hungry again?" you coo softly, rocking him gently.
Levi watches you, his gaze lingering on the way your wet hair clung to your skin. His heart races, jealousy mixing with an overwhelming sense of desire. You look effortlessly beautiful, holding the child you both created.
"Do you even know what you're doing to me right now?" Levi mutters under his breath, his voice low enough that you didn't catch it.
You smile at him, your voice soft and sweet. "You made me so happy by being a great dad today. I even prepared this surprise…" You say indicating your nightie. "I thought you'd already have him asleep by now, but…" You trail off, glancing at the boy now dozing in your arms. "Maybe he just needed his mother's scent to fall asleep."
Levi scoffs lightly. "Maybe. Or maybe he just decided to show mercy to his old man," he grumbles, though his eyes softens as they flick between you and his son.
You gently pat your son's back until he fully drift off, then carefully place him in the crib. "He's asleep," you whisper with a smile, tucking him in.
Then, you turn to Levi, a playful glint in your eyes. "Now…" you whisper and before Levi could react, you push him backward, leading him away from the crib. "Finally! It's only you and me now…" you murmur, your voice sending a shiver down his spine. Gently, he reaches out, tucking a damp strand of hair behind your ear.
"You're not the only one who needs this," he admits, his voice low.
Without another word, you slip your arms around his waist and lean into him, your head resting against his neck as you smile widely at his words.
"I love you, Levi,"
Levi’s lips quirks into the faintest smile as his hand cups your face.
"I love you too," he murmurs, leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead, then your temple, and finally your lips.
The kiss was slow and deliberate, as if he was trying to convey everything he feels but can't put into words. His lips caresses yours softly, as if this is the first time he's kissing you. When you finally pull back, his forehead rests against yours, and for a moment, the world felt perfectly still.
"Come on," you whisper, taking his hand and lacing your fingers through his. "Let's enjoy the quiet while we can. You have to make a proper use of your suprise before your brat wakes up...."
Chuckling at your words, Levi follows your lead. His hand holding yours tightly as you lead him to the bed. The warmth of his gaze stays on you, a silent promise lingering in the air.....
You are his world, and nothing will ever change that.
188 notes · View notes
bellysoupset · 1 day ago
Text
The Superbowl - Part III
Wendy was way in over her head.
The chill, enjoyable Superbowl sunday she had planned to have had gone downhill so quickly that she didn't quite know what to do with herself.
First and foremost there was the guilt. Doubled, as she felt guilty for omitting such a secret from Vince, but also guilty on his behalf. As if his faux pas had been done by her, or rather, was a direct result of her not telling him beforehand, even if Wendy stood her ground on the issue. Ugh.
Then there was the annoyance. At Vin for the "joke", for yelling at her in the car, as if she should prioritize him over her morals, and at Luke for how defensive he was acting, ready to kick them out. The annoyance was weak in comparison to how overwhelmingly guilty she felt, but it was there, simmering in the back of her mind.
Finally, there was the concern. About her boyfriend, who was so disastrously sick, about Bella and Luke, about Jonah whom she hadn't expected to also be sick, about Luke and Vin's clearly shaken friendship...
"Hey," Luke walked into the kitchen, where Wendy had been filling up two different glasses of water and had zoned out so badly that now it had spilled all over the sink.
"Shit!" Wen jumped, putting down the glasses and looking around for a dishcloth so she could dry the mess, "sorry, Luke, I wasn't paying attention-"
"It's alright," he shrugged, not one bit worried about the spill, "uhm-" he rubbed his face, looking and sounding exhausted, "Vince's in my room with Bell, he kinda crashed..." Lucas grimaced, crossing his arms to his chest, "I'm gonna go check on Jon, can I give him pepto if he's done throwing up too?"
"Yeah," Wendy nodded, then remembered why she was in the kitchen in the first place, "you guys don't have it, though."
"Ah," Luke sounded defeated, "I can go get-"
"Tree in the middle of the road."
"Oh yeah," he breathed out, pressing his lips into a thin line, "I guess we are all just gonna rawdog this, then."
Wendy let out a little hysterical giggle, pressing her back against the cabinets and taking him in. She hadn't really seen Luke since that day in the hospital and she fully expected him to be a mess. If Bella was a champion at compartmentalizing and ignoring her own feelings, Lucas was just emotions stacked on top of each other to form a 6'3 guy.
Nevertheless, despite how tired he seemed with the whole situation and how worried he was, he looked fine. Better than she expected.
"Are you alright?" She asked and he looked spooked at the question, eyes jumping from the medicine cabinet back to her face.
"Uh, yeah, just a little stomachache, I'm fine-" he answered, much to her surprise, because that wasn't what Wendy had meant at all.
"You're sick too?" Leo whined, walking into the kitchen and Wendy's shoulders dropped in relief. Since when did she feel this comforted by the blonde's mere presence?
"How's Jon?" Wendy and Luke asked at the same time and Leo grimaced.
"Kicked me out," he grimaced, making a thumbs down gesture, "diarrhea."
"Poor thing," Wendy said, while Luke only winced in sympathy, "can I go through your medicine kit?" she figured that while there was no pepto in the cabinet, maybe they had imodium or something in the kit.
"Sure," Luke turned around to grab it, then handed her a big brown bag, overflowing with pill bottles, "it's mostly headache medicine and birth control, though."
It really shouldn't be that big of a deal, but the second he said those words, Leo perked up as if he was a puppy who had just heard "food."
Lucas cringed at the sudden tension, arms crossed and all but curling on himself, "what?" he asked, almost against his will, while Leo bit down on his lip, curiosity consuming him. Wendy wasn't any better, she was definitely itching to get a first hand version of the facts, instead of the many miscommunications of their group for the past weeks, but she couldn't erase that haunted look in Luke's face at the hospital from her mind. He had been scared, like a little boy, so she was more than a little hesitant to ask for a retell of the facts.
"Did you know?" Leo's voice was gentle, although curious, incredibly honest, "or did Bell?...Were you two trying-"
"No," Luke interrupted, shaking his head quickly, "no. Neither of us knew and we don't want a baby now either. It was an a-" he frowned, as if the word accident offended him, "none of us knew."
Leo nodded, slowly, a frown between his brows, taking a step closer, "and you're okay?"
"I'm fine," Luke winced, palming his stomach and blowing out a little burp, ducking his chin to his chest, "Wen, we don't have anything? Not even TUMS?"
It was a clear deflection, but Wendy knew better than to press it and clearly so did Leo, as his shoulders collapsed and he pursed his lips in a frustrated, defeated manner.
"I'm not sure," Wendy said, dumping the contents of the bag on the counter and going through the medications. Like Luke had said, there were at least five different migraine meds, hardcore stuff too, several birth control blisters... "Leo," her head snapped up and the blonde jumped.
"Yeah?" he moved closer, itching to feel useful, stealing a glance at Luke from the corner of his eye as if their friend was a timebomb. If it was due to the fact he had been clearly poisoned too or not, Wen wasn't sure.
"Did you bring Jonah's medicine bag," she asked, hopeful, "he's got Zofran there as well as the benzos, right?"
"Right," Leo nodded eagerly, "yeah, it's in the car, I'll go get it- Can one of you check on Jon? Just make sure he didn't drown there?"
"I'll go," Wendy vowed, then gestured to the two glasses of water she had filled up, pointing at Luke, "can you try and get the two patients upstairs to drink? And not puke on them?"
Lucas snorted, opening a smile that was more of a wince than anything, "I'm not gonna be sick... Not yet, I don't think."
Wendy made a disbelieving face, but soon they all went different paths.
He climbed up the staircase once more, now with the glasses. Luke's whole body felt heavy and although he hadn't lied and he wasn't feeling close to puking, he did feel horribly nauseous.
He also didn't really want to be on Vin's duty, which was selfish and ugly of him, Lucas was aware of it.
Bella was sitting up as he walked inside the bedroom and promptly planted the glasses on top of one of the multiple boxes filled with clothes, so he could brace against his knees and force up a wet burp.
"Aw Luke," Bell whispered, her voice barely audible, "you too?"
He waved her off, wiping the drool from his lips and the clamminess from his face, "I brought you some water," he whispered, circling the bed. It was unnerving that Vin was able to sleep with them chatting, as he normally woke up with any and all minor noise.
Now he looked terrible and Lucas' heart squeezed with worry. Somehow he looked worse than Bell, who had been throwing up for longer and was way smaller.
His wife was sitting against the pillows, dwarfed in his deep green hoodie, her hair sticking out from inside the hood, fiery curls licking at her pale face. She was wearing a washed out, stained pair of leggings under, leg warmers pulled up, and still she shivered as the wind howled outside, the snow hitting their window.
"There's a blizzard going on," Luke mumbled, sitting down and passing her the glass of water, as well as planting Vin's on the bedside table. Bell made a face, but she did take a small sip, followed by a much bigger one as the thirst made itself known. Luke lowered her hand, moving the glass away from her lips and biting down a smile as she let out a pathetic whimper, "you'll make yourself sick, baby. Let's see if this stays down."
"Doubt it," Bella scoffed, setting down her glass and then crawling closer, hugging him as she climbed his lap, pressing her lips to his shoulder, "don't be mad," she whispered in his ear, squeezing her arms around him, "he didn't know."
Luke rolled his eyes, hugging her back, squeezing his eyes shut as Bell became an unpleasant pressure against his unsettled stomach. He muffled a burp against the excess of fabric hanging from her shoulder.
"I know," Luke turned his head, pressing a kiss to the pulled up hood, "I'm not mad."
That wasn't a lie, per se.
He had been furious the second the words came out of Vin's lips, but Bella was right and Luke couldn't deny it even if rage had blinded him. Vince didn't know. He couldn't have, no one did.
The problem wasn't the ill placed joke that Bella had already forgiven and Vin had apologized profusely for, it was deeper than that. He wasn't angry, he was... Disappointed. Enlightened. Sad.
His stomach rolled, churning up the dip and chips from before. He hadn't eaten as much as the rest of them, too busy pacing the living room and yelling at the screen, but whatever he had eaten was sitting like a brick, indigestion making him sweaty and burpy.
"Are you okay?" Lucas squeezed his hand around Bella's waist, pulling back so he could get a good look at her face. He knew they were in different pages, had known from the minute Bell had said the baby when they were in the hospital, the weeks that followed had only proved his point. Bella surely didn't plan for them to have a kid now, but she'd be happy if they did, and there lied the crux of their issue. Lucas had only felt relief once the concern about his wife's wellbeing was addressed. He was not ready to be a father and the two scares, the one she hadn't told him and the real miscarriage, had only made that abundantly clear.
Bella nodded, making a grossed out face and shuddering as her belly let out an audible whine, "I'm feeling awful," she said, bluntly, "but I'm alright..." She squeezed his arm, "you should talk with Vin. Before he throws himself off one of our balconies."
Luke rolled his eyes at her humorous tone, the knot deep in his chest loosening up just a smidge, "I will," he promised, turning to look at Vince, who was curled up as much as he could and had an arm wrapped around his stomach. He was white as spoiled milk and his curls were glued down to his face, despite the chilliness of the room.
"Is Wen downstairs?" Bella moved up, gingerly, using his shoulder as support, "Leo and Jon?"
"Jonah's sick too," Luke grabbed her hand, wordlessly asking her to stay, but Bell shook her head, squeezing his hand back, "Leo went to get Jon's antinausea meds. If you can keep them down, they might help..."
"Uhm, we'll see about that..." Bell took a deep breath, then pulled her hand from his grip, gesturing to Vin with her head, "talk."
Then she left the room, at a snail pace that was probably less dramatic than she intended. In the far distance, Luke heard Wendy's voice, lower at first, then louder as she walked up the stairs to help Bella down. Cooing.
The chatting faded, then there was the heavy silence of the room.
Vince didn't snore, sick or not, so Lucas didn't have anything to focus on but the deep ache inside his stomach. The nausea continued to prickle at him, in a steady pace, and he wasn't sure if the best option was to just ride it out or if he should pull the trigger and get whatever dip was inside of him out, before the food did that by its own volition.
He didn't have any energy to get up either, which was a weird side effect and Luke wasn't sure if he blamed that on the food poisoning or in the desolation he felt ever since leaving Vin's place, over a month before, when he had caught the flu.
His stomach churned once more and Lucas muffled a burp against his hand, this one much wetter, feeling the jeans that had been loose around lunch now cutting on his belly. A shiver went up his spine and he let out a groan, stumbling to the bathroom and pushing the door closed behind him.
He didn't even need to force it, as soon as he bent down in front of the toilet, his stomach let out a nasty growl and a sweet, rotten taste coated the back of his throat. Luke squeezed his eyes shut, planting a hand on the wall as he refused to kneel down on the cold tiles, and palmed his bloated belly, shaky fingers clumsy reaching for his jeans buttons-
A burp sent him forward and Luke gave up opening his jeans as hot vomit rushed up and splattered in the water. The taste was disgusting and once he started, it was hard to stop. His arm burned with the effort of holding most of his weight and Luke let out a groan, pressing his forehead to the inside of his arm as he tried to catch his breath.
The smell of sickness still assaulted him and he gagged, fruitlessly, spitting inside the toilet and forcefully clearing his throat. His stomach continued to ache, but the queasiness receded, giving space to a deep soreness, as if he had done a long sequence of abdominals.
Lucas flushed the toilet and braced against the sink, scoffing at his reflex. He was already pale to begin with, specially during winter, so he looked phantasmagoric. He washed his face, shuddering at the cold water and swishing it around in his mouth to get rid of the horrible taste.
He tried to take a gulp, but it sat heavily in his belly and Luke white knuckled the marble, breathing through the nausea once more. A burp snuck up, frothy and sickening and he spat inside the sink, washing his face and mouth once more.
When he opened the door, Vince nearly fell inside the bathroom.
Luke jumped back, a hand darting out instinctively to grab Vin by the shoulder and keep him from collapsing, "Whoa! Vin? Hey-"
"Are you okay?" Vince's voice was raspy, but loaded. Worried and guilty.
Luke cringed, he knew he wasn't a quiet puker, but he hadn't meant to wake his friend up.
"Better than you," he scoffed, grabbing the other man's shoulder and pushing at it so Vin would turn around, "how's your stomach, Vin? Leo got some medic-"
"I'm sorry," Vince ignored his rambling, sitting down on the edge of the bed and hunching forward, planting a hand on his face as if he was too embarrassed to even look at Lucas, "I'm sorry. I'm so- So sorry. I shouldn't- I shouldn't have said that, it was a ridiculous joke, I'm so sorry, Luke-"
"It's fine," Luke said quietly, leaning against the ancient wardrobe that faced his side of the bed, crossing his arms, "you couldn't have known."
"Doesn't justify it," Vince scoffed, glaring at him. His eyes had a glint that made Luke want to check for a fever, but he stayed put, "I'm so sorry, Luke."
"It's okay," Lucas grinded his teeth, "really, Vin, drop it-"
"No," Vince shook his head vehemently, "I should've been there for you and I wasn't. I wish I had been there-" although it was an apology, genuinely, there was a veiled accusation in his words. Why hadn't him been told anything?
Luke's stomach churned, now for an entirely different reason. He gulped down, "again, you couldn't have known," he said diplomatically, heart skipping a beat. Vince bit down his lip, looking like a kicked dog at his words.
"Can you- Can you talk with me?" He asked in a small voice, "you didn't say anything about any of this, Luke..." there it was, "what's going on with us?"
Lucas' eyes prickled and he looked away from Vince, out of his bedroom window and to the backyard. They had gotten the weeds removed and the grass trimmed, but now it was all white, until it met the dark trees in the back of the property.
"Luke?" Vince questioned and his voice wavered and fuck- Luke's couldn't speak past the knot in his throat.
"I don't- I don't-" he tried to say, but Vince glared at him, eyes sunken in his face and red rimmed.
"Don't you dare pretend everything's fine, its not," he scoffed, "can you please talk with me? Is it- Is it because of Max? Because I moved away? Why aren't you telling me anything, why didn't I know you were moving until you mentioned it in the group? Why did Leo learn about Bell being pregnant but you were in my place many times after and didn't say a thing? Fuck, Luke, if you had called me when the miscarriage happened I'd be here in a heartbeat-"
A hysterical giggle bubbled up in Luke's throat, eyes burning and hands all sweaty as he felt backed up against a wall, "you were out hiking with Max, remember? He broke his foot."
Vince looked stunned, then his cheeks turned red, angry, "so it is about Max? Lucas, how many fucking times do I need to say you're my best friend-"
"It's not," he felt exhausted, "really, Vin, it's not- It's nothing. I know you're upset you didn't know about the previous scare, but fuck, there was nothing to tell, man! Bell told Leo before she knew it wasn't real, I didn't even know then! And- And..." he was talking circles and he knew it, "and when the miscarriage happened, what did you want me to do? Call you when you're four hours away, to come hold my hand in the waiting room?!"
"YES!" Vince all but shouted, much louder than he intended and Luke jumped at the noise, before the heartbreak that had been simmering in the back of his mind for a month now roared forward with a fury.
"NO!" He yelled, just as loudly, shoving a finger on Vin's chest, "you want to be treated like a best friend? YEAH?" He shoved Vince's chest, furious now, "cool, so did I. In fact, I was a fucking good friend, Vin, I drove to your place, twice a fucking month, for over a year-" Luke took a step back, sharpness overtaking his words, "I prioritized you in everything and then-"
"Then I decided I could have more than one friend and you nearly went mad with jealousy?" Vince accused, angry, and Luke reeled, staring at him as the blood sang in his ears. He felt warm all over.
"I would never, not in a million years," he said, quietly and deadly, "end our friendship over something as small as a jab. An insult," he felt like crying, "I would be angry and I might- I might yell at you, but I wouldn't-"
"What the hell are you talking about?" Vince breathed out, suddenly looking confused and Luke pressed his lips into a thin line, sniffling and nodding, because of course. He had been chewing on those words for a month and Vince didn't even remember them.
"You told me, and I quote, if I ever implied you'd ever cheat on anyone you loved, meaning it or not, you'd end our friendship in a heartbeat," he said, coldly, standing up straight now, "and I get that you were angry, but I could never say that to you. Hell, could you imagine? If I decided that what you said today was worthy of ending our friendship?"
"Luke, I wasn't- I was setting a boundary-" Vince sounded frustrated and scared, as if the gravity of his words was finally dawning on him, "I didn't mean it-"
"I could never say that to you, no matter the reason," Luke repeated, fully tearing up now, "so forgive me if you weren't the first person on my mind when my wife had a fucking miscarriage and I was terrified, Vince. I'm sorry if I thought that you'd rather sit in a room with broken foot Daniels after you did fuck all to prove me otherwise. I'm sorry if I'm having a hard time thinking of you as my best friend, when you spelled it out for me that you're not. I guess I'm a little heartbroken," the last couple words were dripping venom and Luke was panting as he spat them out, chest heaving, vision blurry with tears and hands shaking.
He blinked quickly, angrily brushing away the hot tears and looked away from the blurry spot that was Vince, trying to collect himself when he felt like openly crying, much like he had done when coming back from Vin's that day.
He should be feeling some sort of relief over having it all out in open now, spelled out for Vince, but it didn't. Hell, if anything, Vin's silence was only breaking his heart further, Luke desperately wanted an apology and to make up, even if it would take some effort to genuinely forgive his best friend-
Vince pitched forward with a gag and vomit dripped between his fingers, splashing on the runner rug and between his feet.
"Shit," Luke cursed, stepping closer and side stepping the mess so he could touch Vin's back, feeling a stab of guilt over dressing him down like that when he was so sick... Vince shook with a sob, wincing and flinching when Lucas planted a hand on his back.
"Don't-" He whimpered, hiccup-burping and another mouthful of bile and water splattered down, Vin apparently feeling too sick to bother caring about the mess.
The knot was back in his throat as Luke gulped around nothing, trying to ignore the pain irradiating in his chest and patted Vince's back regardless of his wishes, "it's okay," he said, his pats forcing up another burp and more vomit splashed down on the mess, "get it up."
Vince reached out, blindly, hand curling on Luke's shirt and squeezing it in a tight grip, "Luke-"
"Yeah, I know," Lucas sighed, squeezing his nape and pulling back Vin's curls away from his forehead, "I know, man, you didn't mean it, I know."
Too bad it really didn't make things any better.
TBC
54 notes · View notes
cripplecharacters · 13 hours ago
Note
Hello! I wanted to ask about whether a character of mine would be alright. This character is a double above-knee amputee in a futuristic setting, and I wanted to know if having prosthetics that work a bit more reliably (like under-knee prosthetics, as they replicate the functionality of a knee) would be okay. They don't use their prosthetics all day and do still cause pain like other prosthetics, nor do they give them any other advantage. They still do also use a wheelchair for most of the day, and do not use prosthetics for most of it. For reference, there are also other major characters with limb differences that do not use prosthetics, as well as few other wheelchair users (ambulatory and non ambulatory), some of which have done so due to traumatic injury, and others that were born with limb differences or other congenital issues. This character in specific is in a position of privilege that gives them the chance to opt to the best available technology too.
I wanted to approach this carefully and make sure it wasn't falling into a harmful trope. I'm also physically disabled, for context, although I am not an amputee.
Hello!
Standard disclaimer, we don't have amputee mods right now.
Yes, it's fine to give your character prosthetics that work - they work for a lot of people. We just stress that they aren't a miracle cure-all because usually in fiction, prosthetics are treated as essentially aesthetic (if the author wants to show they Done Research, they will mention that the character has phantom pain once). But prosthetics, just as other mobility aids, are well - aids. They have their cons and pros, and sometimes they are useful and sometimes they aren't, and there's a billion factors that go into that.
We do currently have prosthetics that essentially mimic a knee, they're called microprocessor knees and they basically try to adapt to how the person walks. They're quite expensive, but I know that a lot of amputees who use them find them really helpful.
This obviously still doesn't make them perfect in every way. It's still, for example, more tiring to walk on prosthetics. You're using less muscle to move around more weight. This can sometimes be difficult when going up and down the stairs, for example. A lot of the DAKAs I've seen walk with very straightened legs, and many of them need to use a handrail to maintain stability when using the stairs. In this video you can see someone who is (presumably) similar to your character (a young fit guy) and he himself says that it's a bit of a complicated process. You need to use a lot of momentum. All of this gets easier with more practice, so you might have to consider how long has your character been an amputee for - if they were born like this, they'd probably have a lot of this long time figured out, but if it's more recent, they might still be in the relearning phrase; it's not easy to just change the way you walk overnight.
I know some DAKAs who use "little leg" prosthetics (I'm honestly not sure what the english name is), they're basically shortened prosthetics that take the calf part away, and you have much more stability, etc. Some people use these at home since you can save energy and don't have to walk anywhere too far. So that could be another option you could include that I don't think I've seen in anything ever.
TLDR; yes, it's perfectly fine to give your character a working mobility aid - just keep researching as you write, and don't be afraid to check even the most basic "how do DAKAs do XYZ" stuff - there's some nuance even in figuring out how to get up from the floor after you fall down. :)
mod Sasza
38 notes · View notes
mirai-e-jump · 2 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger Photobook: Don't Stop the BoonBoom Main Cast Member Interviews (translations and other pages below, very long post)
Publication: February 14, 2025
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Iuchi Haruhi (Taiya Hando)
-Taiya cranks up his mood without showing emotion-
Everyone wrapped up filming together. At the time, it really didn't hit me. I think it was about two days later that I actually felt it……
Over this past year, I had a routine that I set up for myself, where the day before filming, I'd reread the script for corresponding scenes, and always make sure to do a final check before going to sleep. However, I guess that's come to an end. Now that filming is completely over, I feel alittle sad, as I can actually sense that Taiya's fading away.
Regarding Taiya, when I look back, the first thing I was conscious of was raising my mental age and trying to play my role as a calm character. However, if I made him too cool, he'd be too similar to Chasshiro, so instead of expressing his emotions, I'd crank up parts of his mood……I put great value into those kinds of things while acting.
The first scene we filmed was for the first episode, where Taiya buys the luxury brand store. I remember I didn't know how to move in relation to the camera's position, and was just trying to figure it all out. Not long after that, I had the opportunity to film my Boonboom Change, and when I put on the Boonboom suit for the first time, I had the feeling of, "I'm a hero!" The other thing I remember well was post recording with Director Nakazawa's team during episodes 1-3. At first, I held back my voice in order to keep it in line with Taiya's character, but when Director Nakazawa told me to "make it much more louder," I realized that it was "okay for him to be in high spirits after the Change." That became one of the opportunities for me to broaden my perspective of Taiya Hando.
I'd been going out to eat with the other members since fairly early on, but as filming progressed, it was exciting to see the number of friends increase one by one. The first climax for the five Boonboomger members was in episodes 8 and 9, when Taiya rushed over to them and said, "This is the most…," to which the other four replied, "Cranked up." It was an unforgettable, passionate scene. I think this moment slightly changed the way Taiya interacted with everyone.
Also, the presence of Yu-kun, who joined us halfway through, was a big deal. Until then, I had always thought that the right thing to do was to act according to the image the professional Directors or Cameramen had in their minds, so I had never thought of acting based on my own initiative. However, when I watched Yu-kun, he'd constantly make suggestions like, "I wanna move like this, but what do you think?," and I saw the course of things change, as those on set would respond with, "Alright then, let's go with that!" That's when I started reading the script with the thought of, "As one of the people creating this show, I also have to get involved on set!," and my attitude once again changed alittle bit.
-A dream filled ending typical of Boonboomger-
In episode 24, I was also happy to have my special skill of playing the guitar put to good use. As a matter of fact, during our first meeting, the Producers asked me, "Do you have any special skills?," to which I answered, "I can sing and play the guitar." That's when the Screenwriter's desire to "write about Taiya's first love" was incorporated, causing the episode to materialize. The script doesn't go as far as to depict what happened to Mahiro Sensei, but I wanted to understand it in my own way, so I talked to the Director and Producers before I went into it, and I even imagined what kind of feelings Taiya would be having and wrote them down in a notebook. The subject of the story was painful, but the shoot itself was fun. Taiya's a character who I had a hard time getting into, but by depicting him during his childhood, I think I was able to dig deeper into my role.
I pushed myself to the limit towards the very end of Boonboomger and lost about 5kg, which caused some concern as my face began to look really hollow (bitter smile). Still, as a result, I was able to get into it and concentrate while playing Taiya. The scene where he conveys his feelings to the other four during episode 45 was very memorable. In the completed footage of episode 37, a flashback scene was inserted, the one where child Taiya hears sad crying in the next room, and I was there to observe the filming of that scene. I wanted to internalize Taiya's feelings, so I asked and was allowed to sit in the same spot after they filmed it. I performed the scene with the other four in episode 45 with that in mind, so I was able to convey Taiya's feelings clearly.
I liked the last scene in the final episode. I thought the reversed situation was good, as it concludes with us five who protected Earth leaving for space, and Sakito, who had said that he "abandoned Earth," staying behind. For me, it was a conclusion that I would've never imagined. I was really excited while filming our participation in the BBG, and being able to say the line "Let's get cranked up!" at the very last moment will always remain in my heart. I believe it was a dream filled ending, one truly typical of Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Hayama Yuki (Ishiro Meita)
-I aimed to play a role that anyone would think was cool-
For my role as Ishiro, I first talked with BoonBlue's Suit Actor Yoneoka Takahiro-san about how I wanted to "make him a cool character by any means," and so we decided to aim for a role that anyone would find cool, from his gestures and posture, to his pose when he changes into BoonBlue. Going along with that, his passionate side also came out around episode 6. The Director in charge of each episode enjoyed those playful parts and would tease me about it, so by also adding in some adlibs myself, I think I was able to broaden the range of my role. Yoneoka-san gave an energized performance in the Go-Onger episode, but by seeing that, it made me feel that although Ishiro's a spy of the underground, he was longing for something "sparkling," and I feel that it further expanded my role.
The first time Ishiro's past during his spy era was depicted was in episode 14. It was an episode that showed Ishiro's cool, cranked up appearance, but I felt that if I didn't establish a solid "foundation" here, it would affect how he was seen in the future. That's why I was so fired up to film the flashback scene. I also received tons of motivation from Miu-chan in this episode. Miu-chan has an extensive acting career, and above all else, the ways she delivered her lines were very convincing. The sequence of events that leads to Ishiro being stunned as she says, "You want to protect the place that's important to you, right?!," is a scene that everyone needs to watch. Up to that point, Ishiro had kept abit of a distance from everyone except for Taiya, but I think this was the first time he was willing to approach another member of the team.
The next spy story was in episode 29, which features a scene where I Boonboom Change while fighting against Gong Grumer, and I challenged myself to doing action, which isn't one of my strong points. Also, I was paired up with Sakito. Compared to the other three, he had a greater sense of distance from Sakito, but since they suddenly got involved right from the start, it was difficult trying to figure out how I should treat him. Also, when Sakito says, "You didn't grow up well, huh?," he responds with, "My parents did the same work I'm doing. You can figure out the rest." It's a line that expresses Ishiro's dark past, and he tells it to the person he was most distant from. It was an important moment that brought the two of them closer together.
Episode 37 had alot of action scenes, and I believe I was able to get them done with the support of Action Director Watanabe Jun-san and Yoneoka-san. I think that different people have different interpretations of the relationship between Ishiro and Naito Konomi-san's Sutea, and although we watched each other's performance on set, we never really compromised on things. I hope everyone enjoys speculating on that point. On the opposite end, Director Hayama Koichiro gave me easy to understand examples of how the fake Ishiro would fight against Taiya, which helped me better visualize his image. What's more, for the action scenes involving Taiya, Haruhi stayed with me countless times until I memorized how to do them, which was very helpful.
-If you grab hold of your wheel, things will become clearer-
From episodes 43-47, I think some of you may have been on edge watching Ishiro's actions. Still, since Taiya said in episode 37, "I can tell just by looking into his eyes," it was properly foreshadowed. Although Ishiro pointed his gun at everyone at the end of episode 43, it's important to note that Taiya's reaction at that moment wasn't captured. This was Director Nakazawa Shojiro's goal, as this detail wasn't in the script, but since he and Taiya trust each other without needing to say anything, he purposely left out Taiya's reaction. As for myself, I think that the role Ishiro played during the very end was a great one. Mira's marriage is an homage to the first episode, and his return in episode 47 along with his partner, Boonboom Marine, made me feel "cranked up" when I read the script.
The wrap up for actors was the final roll call during the final episode, and we were all able to finish filming together. Each person's name was then called out on the spot, and everyone would cry. I was determined not to cry, but when they called my name, Producer Kuji Yoshito-san and Director Nakazawa came into my sight, and I couldn't stop crying……I'm not entirely sure if I was able to speak coherently then, but I was truly overwhelmed with emotions in that moment.
The theme of Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger is to "take control of your own wheel," and while it may have looked as if Ishiro had sold his soul to the Hashiriyans during the very end, I believe that he was able to steer his way down the path of victory by taking the wheel in his own way. In reality, things may not always go as planned, but if you grab the wheel without abandoning your beliefs, I'm sure something will become clearer. For us actors, we'd be beyond happy if you could take away such a message from our work.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Suzuki Miu (Mira Shifuto)
-I tried to be conscious of "Mira's feelings" when performing in the second half-
After filming throughout the year, I did have some vague concerns in the beginning, but I'm really glad that we were able to get through it safely without any major accidents or problems occurring. Also, after a year of working with the same staff, I realized just how much fun it is to work together as "friends" to create a production.
As for my role as Mira, I was told that she doesn't "take a backseat to the main character," but is instead the first character that the viewers can emotionally attach themselves to as the story progressed. I knew that if I didn't carefully act out Mira's growth throughout the year, it would appear rushed and unconvincing, and by extension, the story wouldn't hold up. In the beginning however, Mira was presented in a fairly fun way. In the script, her screams were written as "Piyaaa!" (laughs). That was one of the reasons why up until about the halfway point, I was more conscious of how she was being seen from the outside instead of from the inside. However, in the latter half, I tried to play the role with "Mira's feelings" in mind, rather than thinking too much about "how I want her to be seen." In that regard, there may be a big difference between the beginning and the ending. I was also happy that Director Nakazawa Shojiro noticed that and said that "I had changed up my performance quite abit."
In the very beginning, it was fun being teamed up with Chasshiro in episode 6. I think Mira's someone who can be paired up with anyone, but Mira seems to be the only one who can make teasing Chasshiro look amusing (laughs). Even in the scene where we follow Jou, I had alot of fun filming and discussing the details with Yuki-kun, such as how we'd hide ourselves by retying our shoelaces and hiding behind a telephone pole.
Episodes 8 and 9 was the first crisis that the Boonboomgers faced, and the atmosphere on set was tense and different compared to the previous episodes. During all this, I think it was just like Mira to vent her feelings towards Taiya at the end of episode 8 with, "Why would you do such a reckless thing?" However, I could understand the feelings they both had, and condemning someone for something you're not aware of was pretty difficult to perform. I thought it'd be bad if she came off as being too confrontational, so I played the role hoping to convey Mira's honesty.
-I love how everyone in Boonboomger lives their lives to the fullest-
There were multiple main episodes for Mira, such as episodes 14, 20 and 31, but episode 36, in which I performed with Mori Hinami-chan, is the most memorable. When she learns that Aki, played by Hinamin, had given up on her dream, she speaks her mind by saying, "It's frustrating….that unlike how Taiya is with Boon-chan…..I can't make her dream come true." I had discussions with Director Watanabe Katsuya about that scene, and I thought about it alot myself. Mira's story began with her easygoing personality in the first episode, but up until then, there were very few scenes depicting her being worried. Mira's usually cheerful and in high spirits, so I wondered, "Would it be okay to show her being worried?," but I think it's her worries that really show the strength of their friendship.
Also in this episode, there's a scene where I Boonboom Changed without the helmet, so I also played the last scene where the mask was equipped. I was advised to pull my chin up in order to look cooler, but I was pretty scared since my field of vision was limited and I could only see my feet. Still, I ran as hard as I could, hoping that I'd look cool.
I think the major event at the end of the show was the development of Mira's decision to get married, which was depicted in episode 47. To be honest, I had something that was worrying me as the story was unfolding, and I talked to the Producers about it. Even though she became a Boonboomger in the first episode and was working hard at her part time jobs, I wondered, does Mira have any big dreams in her life? They created this development based on that. I wanted Mira to have a dream, but instead, it's Mira's strong desire to help the people in front of her that helped her grow so much. I took this as a message that the staff had prepared for my sake. During the actual shoot, after she decided to get married, there was the line, "This is how I'll grab hold of my wheel," and just looking at everyone's faces made me cry……I believe that this performance came out because I'd been building up my role as Mira and trusting everyone.
Based on the title, many of you may have thought that Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger was a cheerful and upbeat production. I myself am one of those people, but with six people, there were six different lives, and now that it's all over, I strongly feel that the appeal of this show was that "each and every one of them overcame their struggles and became stronger." For myself personally, I have always and will always love the way everyone in Boonboomger lives their lives to the fullest.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Saito Ryu (Jou Akuse)
-I was surprised at how similar I was to Jou Akuse-
When I was in elementary school, I served as class president and was known for being a rather serious type of person. However, I wasn't serious at all, as I had more of a clumsy side in comparison (laughs). That's why when I first learned about Jou's setting, I was very surprised at how similar he seemed to myself. Also, my own father is a firefighter, so I felt a sense of familiarity towards his role as a police officer, as they're also civil servants. That being the case, I thought, "If I just honestly express all the feelings I've had over the past 19 years of my life, I might be able to become Jou Akuse." During the beginning, I went into filming with those types of thoughts in mind.
Jou's real role began in episode 5, but the first scene we filmed was in the first episode, where he gets wrapped up in one of Wedding Dress Grumer's dresses. It was fun to see his clumsiness immediately come out, but Director Nakazawa Shojiro had told me, "It's fine to make as much noise as you'd like." At the time, my performative skills were still lacking, so I was abit confused. I now have the confidence that I can make things more interesting (laughs).
I put alot of effort into the fight scene against Darts Grumer in episode 5. I knew from the moment I read the script that the action leading up to my Boonboom Change was "an absolute must." During filming, Darts Grumer's Suit Actor Imai Yasuhiko-san lent me his support by saying, "It's okay to go all out," and under the passionate direction of Director Watanabe Katsuya, we filmed with my entire body getting covered in sand and dust. That day, I went home and shampooed my hair about six times, but sand kept falling from my head (laughs), and even when I rewatch it now, I can see just how much strain I put on my body. Director Watanabe also helped me out alot in the episode where I'm paired up with Mira, but I think episode 5 was the starting point for me as Jou.
From the moment we met, I became good friends with the other cast members. We didn't have many opportunities to meet until episode 4, but after episode 5, I think we were able to join up smoothly from episode 6 onwards. I was happy to finally be able to film together with everyone.
In episode 6, he immediately gets involved with Mira and Shiro Senpai, and I was also grateful for all the opportunities after that where Jou played a bigger role, such as in the Kaseki Grumer episode, the candy detective episode where he teamed up with Genba, and the baseball episode. What's more, they were all crazy episodes (laughs). Especially for episodes 21 and 23, the one in charge of them was Director Kato Hiroyuki, and he's the kind of Director who'll constantly incorporate alot of funny things, so I also had alot of fun while getting into a playful mood. In episode 21, there's a scene where I interact with Genba in my afro hairstyle, and I thought it'd turn out funnier the more serious I performed it. I took these kinds of things into consideration when I performed.
-I cried so much during the wrap up, that I was teased by everyone around me (laughs)-
Episode 40 was the episode where I myself felt a sense of accomplishment. After episode 15 aired, I received feedback from various people telling me that "it was good," but it was thanks to Director Hayama Koichiro, who brought out Jou's appeal, that I as an actor felt the desire to show off even more of my performative range. This time, episode 40 was naturally made possible thanks to Morichi Natsumi-san's wonderful script, and Director Nakazawa and Cinematographer Kamiaka Toshikazu-san's strong tag team, but I could personally feel the growth I had made up to that point, and the line, "There's no such thing as a 100% perfect hero," went viral on SNS, with the great response from those around me also giving me confidence.
Filming for the last chapter progressed at a good pace, and it felt like it went by in the blink of an eye. During this time, what surprised me was Chasshiro's betrayal and Boon-chan's defeat. I had only heard alittle bit about it beforehand, but when it was time to read the script, I was shocked and thought, "Are you serious?!" And then, Jou quit being a police officer, and in episode 46, he was confronted by his senior officer played by Takada Masashi-san……I didn't expect things to turn out this way, so I had abit of trouble trying to wrap my head around the situation. It was as big of a situation for me as it was for Jou. In the end, the five of us left for space, so I interpreted it with, "I guess he's on temporary leave for the time being?"
The Assistant Director made the necessary adjustments to our schedules so that everyone would be able to be together for the wrap up. The night before the last day of filming, I cried all alone at home due to feeling lonely, so on the very day of filming, I thought I'd be fine since I cried ahead of time. However, when I saw the face of BoonBlack's Suit Actor, Shige-san, I couldn't help but cry. I was crying so much that everyone around me jokingly said, "You're crying way too much!" (laughs). Over the past year, there were times where I was guided gently, and times where I was guided strictly, but I was truly happy on this set.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Soma Satoru (Genba Bureki)
-From being a Procurer with a detached position to becoming friends with the Boonboomgers-
When it was decided that I'd be playing the role of Genba Bureki, I was told that, unlike the other members, I'd be "playing an alien." However, since I didn't know the reason why he was always licking lollipops or the beliefs that he held, I had to make detailed adjustments all the time while thinking, "I guess it'd be alright if I did this much." It was around the time we were filming the Summer film when I learned about the developments for the second half of the story, and I thought that his feelings toward Nicola, who was invaded by Hashiriyans, were different from everyone else's, so I was conscious of those expressions in my performance.
In the beginning, I didn't have much to work with, so I was trying to figure out how to say distinctive lines such as "Seems like you're in trouble" in a way that felt right to me. There's abit of a suspicious, older feel to him, and I thought it'd be great if I could add some expressions that were unique to Genba. The first thing we filmed was the scene in episode 2, when he receives a job request from Taiya. From episodes 1-6, he had watched them from a detached position as a Procurer, so I was very happy when we were ready to film episode 7, as he joins the Boonboomger's as their friend.
In episode 10, I was able to do some action before his transformation. I was confident in my athletic abilities, but the movements done by BoonOrange's Suit Actor Ono Yukimasa-kun, who showed me some examples, were amazing, and while I felt alittle overwhelmed, I tried to do my best. Ono-kun and I would both always talk about "how we felt during this part," and I was always amazed by the action I saw during post recording.
His destined rival Disrace appeared at the end of episode 26, and he left Boonboomger in episode 27. There's a scene where he says, "That's why I'm giving up my front row seat," and as myself, I definitely didn't want to leave, but at the same time, he doesn't want to involve his friends any further, so……it was quite difficult for me to perform. After that, I didn't get to see everyone as often as I would've liked to, and there were also no good opportunities to go out and eat together. That's why when he returned in episode 33, I was so happy that I couldn't help but talk nonstop with everyone on set (laughs).
During filming of episode 33, I almost cried when I said the line, "This is the place where I belong," and I was also deeply moved when Taiya asked, "What has the Procurer procured for us?" to which I answer, "Myself, of course." The scene where all of us perform the Boonboom Change also suddenly made me feel that "having friends is great." I was personally grateful for the fact that both episodes 27 and 33 were done by Director Nakazawa, as I was able to make progress while consulting with him.
-One thing remains for Genba, that being his important mission to retake planet Bureki-
I also enjoyed being together with Sakito during the soccer episode. We're both from Shizuoka, and I'm a Shimizu S-Pulse supporter, so because of this connection, we were invited to participate in an event by Shimizu S-Pulse in September. As for the drama, he clashes with Sakito, and well, fighting doesn't bring them closer together, but because they both love soccer, it seems like they let out more unnecessary feelings than usual. They had clashed before in episode 32, but I think they were finally able to work out their differences in this episode.
I had the feeling that the "end" was gradually approaching during the final stages of filming, but in the final episode, when their transformations are cancelled during the battle with Spindo, as we were filming the scene where they stand up while conveying their feelings, the feeling that "it was finally coming to an end" suddenly hit me. Here, Genba says, "In this universe, that's what we call love," but combined with the location, which captured the sunset, and the atmosphere on set, it made me get more into it.
The ending was a beautiful conclusion, but as for Genba, he still hasn't retaken planet Bureki. Because there's still an important mission left to do, it didn't finish with a happy ending, however, they were able to defeat both Grantu and Spindo and save Earth, so it was still a big step in the right direction.
Now that it's all over, I feel alittle sad since I no longer have to spend time thinking about the next day's shoot. Looking back, I really didn't know what I was doing a year ago, but I'm here now thanks to all the fans who supported me, and over the past year, through the feedback I received at events and on SNS, I was motivated by the fact that I was involved in a production that was loved by so many people. I'll work even harder so that everyone who got to know me through Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger will see a different side of me. I look forward to your continued support!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Miyazawa Yu (Sakito Homura)
-I was able to gain experience both as myself and as Sakito Homura-
When I "encountered" Sakito at the audition, I felt that he was so similar to me, that I thought, "If I fail this, I don't think I'll ever have a chance in any tokusatsu production." Once I entered filming, I was very happy to hear that Director Hayama Koichiro said on set that he had "wanted to film Miyazawa as Sakito." When he makes his entrance during episode 16, I played the role with the impression that he was an overly self conscious perfectionist, but as things continued with episodes 17 and 18 being done by Director Kato Hiroyuki, I was able to bring out more of his weaknesses.
During the joint reading session before I went into filming, the Director and Producers said that they wanted me to "act in a childish way," but I was thinking of taking my performance in a slightly different direction, so the most important thing was being able to create Sakito on my own terms. Also, I think that by looking for places where I could be abit playful on set, I was able to gain experience both as myself and as Sakito Homura.
Episode 41 is an episode that I'm deeply attached to, as I was able to incorporate my special skill of playing soccer. The "Pulse Ace" that appears is a play on Shimizu S-Pulse, but I used to be a member of Shimizu S-Pulse's lower division when I was in middle school, and I was deeply moved by the collaboration event between Boonboomger and Shimizu S-Pulse that took place during the broadcast. The story was rich in content, with its appropriate comedic feel, our passion for soccer, and my pairing with Genba, so I think the viewers enjoyed it. Among other things, the scene where Genba and I pass the ball to each other with napalm exploding in the background had to be done in one take, so I had a fairly long discussion with Satoru beforehand. It was quite difficult even for experienced players like us, as there was gravel everywhere we stepped, and the unique shape of the Boonboom suit's shoes made kicking the ball feel different, but fortunately, we got the OK with our very first attempt. In terms of the story, his clash with Genba reminded me of the sumo episode, and I also thought it was typical of the younger Jou for being so straightforward and acting as their middle man. That scene was effective because of Ryu's careful performance, and I thought it turned out to be a very good scene where you'd naturally think, "If Jou said it, then it must be right."
-The final scene where Sakito remains on the Earth personally gave me goosebumps-
After the soccer episode and Christmas episode, the final stages of the show had some dramatic developments, but episode 45 was the one that I put the most effort into. Bundorio stopped functioning, the Boonboomgers were split up, and Taiya was mentally out of it. During all this, Sakito and Byundi confront the Hashiriyans together……It was a hot development, as the man who abandoned Earth now fought to protect it, but in playing Sakito, I saw it as a "fight to protect his friends." If we go back to episode 18, Sakito said, "I just wanna protect my only friend and his family," but I believe that episode 45 encapsulates the change in his feelings from that point on. This episode was directed by Director Hayama, who also did the episode where I first appeared, and the scene where I pushed my way through the crowd and shouted, "You guys…didn't the Boonboomgers save you?!," was a direction given to me by the Director, so I myself also wanted to live up to the trust he put in me.
In the final episode, I felt the team's unity as they defeated Spindo, and I also thought it was wonderful that everyone's individual scenes were properly depicted. I hope that you were able to feel that high level of unity. And, the final scene where Sakito remains on Earth personally gave me goosebumps. When I first read the script, I thought, "Uwah, this is seriously good!" Living on Earth, the number of people he came to love steadily increased, and it seemed to match up with the way Sakito lives his life, so I'm satisfied with it. I felt that there was nothing wrong with the performance I had been doing, and I can only thank all the staff members for preparing and directing such a conclusion.
The last scene we filmed was our final roll call. This was the end of filming, but the show was still going on, so to be honest, I didn't really feel it. However, when the time came for them to address me, I couldn't help but tear up when I saw the large number of staff members.
I had been involved since episode 16, and was very excited to be in the position of shaking things up as the additional member, and I feel that the feedback I've gotten in regards to that has been good. The show itself will remain even after the broadcast is over, so we'd all be happy if people said, "Boonboomger was great, wasn't it?" We don't know yet if there'll be an anniversary project in the future, but I hope that Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger will remain in the hearts of all the fans forever!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Handwritten Messages
Iuchi Haruhi
"What was the most cranked up scene that you performed as Taiya Hando over the past year?" The scene in the final episode where everyone says, "This is the most cranked up!"
"What did you think was the "coolest part" about Boonboomger (or Taiya Hando)?" The parts were he wouldn't ignore!
"What part of Taiya Hando's "costume" or "weapons" did you think was cranked up?" The tool design of the weapons!
"A word to Taiya Hando!" LOVE
"A word to your Boonboomger friends!" I'm glad it was the six of us…I had fun. Thank you!
"A word to all the fans!" Thank you so much for your support over the past year! I look forward to your continued support!
Hayama Yuki
"What was the most cranked up scene that you performed as Ishiro Meita over the past year?" Bakuage 29's action scenes.
"What did you think was the "coolest part" about Boonboomger (or Ishiro Meita)?" His activities as an Informant.
"What part of Ishiro Meita's "costume" or "weapons" did you think was cranked up?" His three piece suit and necktie that would change every episode. That you could turn the Boonboom Handle with just one hand!
"A word to Ishiro Meita!" I love you.
"A word to your Boonboomger friends!" Ishiro had trouble fitting, so thank you for looking out for him!
"A word to all the fans!" Thank you for your cranked up support!
Suzuki Miu
"What was the most cranked up scene that you performed as Mira Shifuto over the past year?" Episode 36's helmetless running scene.
"What did you think was the "coolest part" about Boonboomger (or Mira Shifuto)?" That she worked hard for the sake of someone else instead of herself.
"What part of Mira Shifuto's "costume" or "weapons" did you think was cranked up?" That you could hold Boonboom Handle's Rod Mode upside down (it's dangerous, so good children shouldn't imitate that!)
"A word to Mira Shifuto!" Mira being cheerful gave me tons of energy! Thank you :)
"A word to your Boonboomger friends!" I was really happy with the six of us! We're forever friends!!!
"A word to all the fans!" I wouldn't have made it this far without everyone's voices of support. Thank you so much!
Saito Ryu
"What was the most cranked up scene that you performed as Jou Akuse over the past year?" My first transformation.
"What did you think was the "coolest part" about Boonboomger (or Jou Akuse)?" Getting dirty.
"What part of Jou Akuse's "costume" or "weapons" did you think was cranked up?" His police uniform.
"A word to Jou Akuse!" You're an honourable man!! Make sure to zip up your fly properly!!
"A word to your Boonboomger friends!" Thank you for the past year! Sorry for when I acted out of line 🖤
"A word to all the fans!" Thank you for your support over the past year! I look forward to your continued support.
Soma Satoru
"What was the most cranked up scene that you performed as Genba Bureki over the past year?" When after leaving once, he reprocured himself through his friends.
"What did you think was the "coolest part" about Boonboomger (or Genba Bureki)?" With every episode, his friends became the embodiment of ​​"taking control of your own wheel."
"What part of Genba Bureki's "costume" or "weapons" did you think was cranked up?" His fluttering costume made action scenes look more attractive.
"A word to Genba Bureki!" I'm glad you returned to Boonboomger!
"A word to your Boonboomger friends!" Thank you for trusting me and waiting for me ^_^
"A word to all the fans!" Thank you so much for always giving us tons of support!
Miyazawa Yu
"What was the most cranked up scene that you performed as Sakito Homura over the past year?" The six person transformation in Bakuage 48!
"What did you think was the "coolest part" about Boonboomger (or Sakito Homura)?" Honestly gaining control of your own wheel!
"What part of Sakito Homura's "costume" or "weapons" did you think was cranked up?" All of it!
"A word to Sakito Homura!" Sakito Homura! Enjoy living a chaotic life on Earth!
"A word to your Boonboomger friends!" Claim absolute victory in the BBG!!
"A word to all the fans!" Thank you for your support in Bakuage Sentai Boonboomger over the past year! It was the most cranked up year!!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The Heroes Cranked Up Roundtable A long roundtable discussion with the six cast members who played the heroes who protected Earth. They'll talk about their memories from the past year, as well as bombshell stories that can only be talked about now?!
-The six cranked up members have gathered-
"First, please tell us about the relationship between the six of you after spending about a year together."
Hayama: In the beginning it was just Satoru-kun, but the older members were extremely reliable.
Suzuki: Yeah.
Hayama: We got so used to it, that we slowly started to develop a habit of screwing around with them (laughs).
Soma: That's right (laughs).
Hayama: Still, I think it's because they both allowed us to do that that people have come to say, "Boonboomger had some great vibes."
Iuchi: That was a big part of it.
Miyazawa: Y'know, I'm not sure if we've forgiven you yet (laughs).
Soma: Right?
Hayama: Even in this interview, we can talk about how we mess with them, so in that sense, Satoru-kun and Zawa-nii are the greatest.
Miyazawa: I suppose so (laughs).
Suzuki: The youngest members, Haruhi-kun and Ryu-kun, are both 20, while Zawa-kun is the oldest at 29 years old, so the age difference between us is the kind where you wouldn't normally have many opportunities to interact so closely. However, I still think the reason we were able to get along so well was because we were together for a year.
Miyazawa: Normally, I'd be concerned about both sides of the situation.
Iuchi: You were cautious.
Hayama: He was, wasn't he?
Soma: In the beginning, Zawa-kun didn't get involved with us at all for some reason.
Miyazawa: That's because there's a generational gap between us (laughs).
Iuchi: I felt the same way too. At first, it was the age difference, and since I went to an entertainment high school that didn't have any club activities, I rarely had any opportunities to interact with my seniors.
Miyazawa: And yet now we're like family.
Soma: We've even been asked, "Are you guys related?"
Suzuki: During the wrap up, the staff had said, "You guys look like relatives."
Miyazawa: It made me realize that even though there's a 9 year gap between us, we become friends.
Hayama: Of course, we weren't just playing around, as Zawa-kun drew a clear line when it came to work, and I really received a ton of inspiration from him. The only exception is Soma-san (laughs).
Soma: So that's how it is, huh? How strange (laughs).
"I see, so this is how you "tease those older than you" (laughs)."
Soma: Even though Hayama-kun and I go out to eat together pretty often…
Iuchi Hayama Suzuki Saito Miyazawa: (laughs).
"Did Soma-san and Miyazawa-san have to worry about anything when dealing with the younger members?"
Soma: I was the oldest of the original five, so I didn't want them to view me as "scary" (laughs). I wanted them to be able to be carefree, so I aimed to create a "Buddha" like appearance, someone who was accepting of everybody (laughs). By the way, we're being interviewed right now while eating our bentos, and Ryu just stole my tamagoyaki……
Saito: He won't get mad at all if I take it from him (laughs).
Soma: No, no, I told you tamagoyaki is my favorite, c'mon now! This is how they mercilessly tease us (laughs).
Iuchi Hayama Suzuki Miyazawa: (laughs).
Miyazawa: I joined in the middle of the show, but after it was decided that I would perform, I searched up information on who I'd be working with. That's when I was like, "They're all younger than me!" (laughs).
Soma: I get that. You were shocked, huh?
Miyazawa: However, I still thought that there was only one person "below me."
Soma: Who? Ryu maybe?
Miyazawa: No, like you, I'm from Shizuoka. That's why I thought you'd be the first one I talked to (laughs).
Suzuki: Did you think you'd have a better opportunity with Satoru-kun since you're both closer in age?
Miyazawa: Yeah. It's because even Miu-chan and I are about five years apart.
Soma: That's true.
Miyazawa: Before we became friends, I wondered if we would even get along.
Suzuki: Usually, when there's that much of an age difference you're like, "Where do we start?"
Miyazawa: I've also said this elsewhere, but at the same time I was having my costume fit, Miu-chan and Ryu came running to the makeup room and excitedly said, "Uwah, so this is Violet!" At that moment, I felt that everything would be alright. Or, perhaps what I mean to say is that I was the one who took a step back (laughs).
Suzuki: That's right! In another interview, Zawa-kun had said that he was grateful for the two of us closing the distance between him, but just recently, when the topic happened to come up in a private conversation, he said, "To be honest, I was abit put off at the time" (laughs).
Saito: That's harsh (laughs).
Miyazawa: It's because of how energetic you kids are.
Iuchi: You're always saying that.
Suzuki: We're all energetic.
Hayama: Right, we tend to hear that alot.
Miyazawa: That's how it is now, but in the beginning I had the feeling of, "How should I deal with them?"
Iuchi: At first, I felt like I had to talk to them as adults, but Satoru-kun and Yu-kun were the ones to bring a stop to that. That's why I'm very grateful for them.
Soma: In our group chat, Haruhi initially used a large amount of emojis, which made me think, "Ah, he's being cautious" (laughs).
Iuchi: Ah, I didn't realize you had seen right through me (laughs).
Soma: I noticed it from the very beginning.
Suzuki: I see. He did use a large amount of them.
Miyazawa: Is that so? I would've liked to have seen that.
Soma: By the time Zawa-kun joined us, he was no longer doing that.
Suzuki: It's because you "brought a stop to that," remember?
Hayama: (he looks at Miyazawa-san) And here I thought you were a good guy.
Miyazawa: Hey!
Iuchi Suzuki Saito Soma: (laughs).
Miyazawa: To begin with, our generations are so different, that I don't know what's popular. People of my generation would do stuff like go to karaoke.
Soma: Yeah. Things like what's popular and fun among today's youth.
Miyazawa: I had no idea about TikTok or anything like that (laughs).
Soma: You know, the way people say TikTok now is with an intonation! (laughs).
Miyazawa: Eh, it's that true?
Soma:……that's how it seems.
Miyazawa: However, it was a completely different story when I entered the set. I was conscious of the fact that it was our place of work.
Soma: There was a clear distinction in the way you'd switch.
Miyazawa: Right, which is the most important thing!
"Do you have any painful or difficult stories that you can only talk about now?"
Iuchi: What's okay to say? (laughs).
Saito: Ah, I was late once.
Suzuki: Wha!
Iuchi: Do you feel remorseful about it?
Saito: I do.
Suzuki: I don't know what to take away from this.
Soma: Just let it play out (laughs).
Saito: However, I made it in time for the shoot itself.
Miyazawa: No, no, that's totally normal then (laughs).
Saito: When you've been doing something like this for a long time, you inevitably start to slack off, huh?
Suzuki: You can't say that about yourself! (laughs).
Iuchi Hayama Soma Miyazawa: (laughs).
Iuchi: What was abit difficult for me during filming was not using my bike. I didn't ride it throughout the filming period because I didn't want to cause trouble if I had an accident. Besides, with it being my first time living in Tokyo, I thought I'd be fine without a bike, as there are tons of trains in Tokyo. However, once I started living there, I found that there were many places that would take too long to get to if I used the train or bus, but could be reached pretty easily by bike. I'm alittle disappointed that I couldn't even go out and have some casual fun (bitter smile).
Saito: That was a model answer!
Miyazawa: Is it okay to talk about what was difficult for me?
Hayama: The Boonboom dance?
Miyazawa: No (said firmly).
Hayama: Not that, huh?
Miyazawa: Sakito's hair style.
Iuchi Hayama Suzuki Saito Soma: Yeah (they fully agree).
Miyazawa: Every time I went to a shoot, it would become coarse and stiff. After filming, I would have to go home and wash my hair because of how difficult it became.
Suzuki: After filming would finish, we'd say, "Let's all go out for a meal!," but only Zawa-kun would go home and take a shower before rejoining us.
Miyazawa: That's because if I left my hair as it was, my hat would look like it was floating.
Iuchi Hayama Suzuki Saito Soma: (laughs).
Soma: That being said, I had trouble with my hair too.
Miyazawa: What was the case for Satoru? It must've been with your Burekiian form.
Soma: Yeah, it was when I transformed into my Burekiian form.
Hayama: Putting on the makeup too.
Soma: That's right. What's more, my skin is fairly tan.
Saito: Sure is.
Soma: So, I had to apply whitening cream in addition to getting my makeup done. I also had to wear cat eye contacts, but if I blinked even slightly, they would immediately rotate. That's why it was very difficult for me to perform close up shots in that condition.
Suzuki: You wouldn't blink.
Soma: Still, they'd eventually also fall out if I didn't blink for a long time.
Miyazawa: Your contacts fell out countless times.
Soma: Yeah.
Hayama: What comes to mind for me was the action. Exercise has never been one of my strong points, and there were a few times where I just couldn't keep up. To be honest, that was really tough.
Soma: No, no, you were really cool!
Hayama: Really?
Suzuki: Yeah.
Soma: Like in episode 37, you were amazing, don't you think?
Hayama: Well, in any case, I was just desperately trying to keep up.
Suzuki: You seem to have good reflexes.
Miyazawa: And he can dance. Me on the other hand, I'm no good at dancing (laughs).
Hayama: Wasn't it quite difficult for Miu-chan to get into costume?
Suzuki: That's right. There were so many part time outfits, so I remember having to get my costume fit for almost every episode (laughs).
Hayama: You went in to get your costume fit all the time.
Suzuki: Also, my legs were very cold.
Hayama: I had a feeling you'd say that.
Suzuki: Especially during Winter (bitter smile).
Hayama: And, those weren't even the worst ones. There's the wedding dress you wore in the final episode.
Suzuki: Yeah.
Hayama: You had to have the staff help you when you moved.
Suzuki: I couldn't move without my attendants.
Hayama: "Attendants" (laughs).
Miyazawa: It really seemed like that.
Suzuki: Also, I couldn't sit on a chair, so when filming stopped, I had a blanket laid out on the floor to sit on until my next turn.
Saito: You were like a princess!
Suzuki: The dress looked like it was floating as it spread out on the floor.
Saito: She often called upon us (Saito-san and Hayama-san) and gave requests like, "Please get me some sweets" (laughs).
Iuchi: She simply couldn't move.
Suzuki: (speaking like a princess) "Excuse me, can you fetch me a drink?"
Miyazawa: She's totally a princess now (laughs).
Suzuki: Another challenging thing was that this production has shorter shots so that smaller children watching wouldn't get bored. In scenes where we convey our feelings, they weren't that long and involved a series of cuts, so we had to raise our emotions pretty intensely, which was difficult. If I had to put it another way, I think it really strengthened our responsive skills.
Hayama: That's a good way of putting it.
Suzuki: You get it though, right?
Hayama: Yeah, I know exactly what you mean.
Suzuki: Zawa-kun had a difficult time with that at first too, right?
Miyazawa: I'd usually start from one or two of my previous lines, but if I thought that it'd still be too difficult, I was allowed to start from even earlier.
Hayama: Yeah, you'd do that.
Saito: Everyone's talking about something serious…
Soma: Ryu, do you have anything else since your story about being late didn't work out?
Saito: Yeah. I play a police officer, so it was quite difficult putting on all that equipment. It was pretty heavy, and there's a proper way of putting it on, so I had to make sure to check it every time. I thought this was to be expected by all the people who actually work as police officers.
Soma: Oh, that was a good story you just gave!
-Looking back at each memorable scene-
"From here, we'd like to ask each of you to pick one person at a time and name a performance or scene of theirs that left a lasting impression on you."
Soma: I guess Haruhi should be first, right?
Hayama: I think I was the closest to Haruhi's Taiya, but when I met him as fake Ishiro in episode 37, the performance Haruhi gave was completely different from what I usually did with him, and I thought the detail in how he differentiated his role was amazing.
Suzuki: The expressions Haruhi-kun showed were really great, as his emotional range swings between the line of difficult and exceptionally good. The facial expression he made at the end of episode 24 also conveyed his delicate feelings.
Iuchi: Thank you very much.
Miyazawa: I still love the, "Let's all hurry!" line he says in the final episode.
Suzuki: That was great too!
Miyazawa: All I can say is that it's like you can see the very moment he switches.
Suzuki: It gives off a similar feeling to when your body trembles with excitement, you close your eyes, and then shoot them open, right?
Miyazawa: Right, it's like that kind of switch.
Suzuki: The scene in episode 45 where Taiya loses sight of his own wheel was really impactful. It's like he was performing with his soul.
Miyazawa: I'll never forget the one on one performance I did with him in episode 18. It made me think, "So this is the man called Taiya Hando, huh?" That scene is still fresh in my mind.
Hayama: (to Iuchi-san) Were you nervous?
Iuchi:……I was (laughs).
Saito: There was a scene that I really liked, the musical scene with Itasha was in the Christmas episode, right?
Soma: Yeah.
Saito: At that point, Taiya makes a face that's like, "Eh?," looks around, then sits down without saying a word, and that made me burst out laughing.
Iuchi: That was entirely Director Kato's direction.
Saito: It was hysterical.
Iuchi: This is especially true since Taiya's not the type of person to do something like that.
Saito: I desperately wanted to say, "Don't just sit there in silence!" (laughs).
Soma: It would've been even funnier if he responded to it with something like, "That was cranked up!"
Suzuki: Yeah, like in the Toilet Grumer Limited episode.
Saito: Yeah, that happened.
Iuchi: That's where I tried to play the version of Taiya that Mira had in her mind (laughs).
Hayama: That was alot of fun.
"Next, what do you think of Ishiro Meita's Hayama-san?"
Iuchi: My favorite scene is in episode 14, when he relies on Mira. Ishiro had always operated in his own world, but Taiya also had the desire to draw him into everyone world, so Taiya felt happy when Ishiro was able to rely on Mira, someone he had come to love. I had read the script beforehand, but when I saw the broadcast, I was moved all over again.
Hayama: That was also made possible due to Suzuki-san's help.
Suzuki: No, no, that's not true.
Iuchi: But it was just the two of you!
Suzuki: Of course, when we were filming that scene, I thought, "Yuki-kun really likes acting." In the aquarium scene in this episode, when Chasshiro shows his annual pass, I (Mira) try to take it, but he quickly pulls his hand back. He was the one who suggested we do that with, "How about if we improvise like this?"
Hayama: All while I acted like a brat (laughs).
Suzuki: I felt that I wasn't capable enough when imagining things that weren't written in the script. That's why Yuki-kun's suggestion made me think, "That could happen!"
Miyazawa: Yuki's really serious, huh?
Suzuki: Yeah, I get him.
Miyazawa: Over this past year, he'd be thinking about the character of Ishiro Meita more than anyone else, and whenever he'd talk about his performance, it was always, "Ishiro's this, and Ishiro's that" (laughs).
Iuchi Suzuki Saito Soma: (laughs).
Miyazawa: There were times when Ishiro would fool around, which I thought would've been difficult, but Yuki was able to express it in his own way. My favorite scene was in the final episode, right before he leaves Earth. He happily says, "An Informant in space, I like the sound of that.
Soma: I also thought he looked happy when I watched him.
Miyazawa: He'd been separated from the Boonboomgers for quite some time, so I think he might've felt bad about it. By doing that performance, I could really feel that he had come back as Ishiro.
Hayama: I'm grateful.
Miyazawa: It was "the best of Ishiro."
Hayama: I'm glad to hear you say that.
Soma: Personally, I liked it when Chasshiro got teased by those around him. Like in episode 40, when Itsuki-kun said, "I want to be a cool hero like BoonBlue," Mira and Jou's reaction was to look at Chasshiro and say, "Cool?" (laughs).
Suzuki: I liked it when Mira pinched his cheeks.
Iuchi: Yeah.
Hayama: That was in the final scene of episode 37.
Soma: It was fun to watch scenes where Chasshiro "comes down" from a stressful situation, as I would think, "Ah, so this is how it's being done this time."
Saito: Yuki-kun mentioned earlier that he's not good at action, and looking back at our first action practice, I could sorta sense that he was having a hard time. However, the action with Gong Grumer in episode 29 was really cool. He must've practiced alot, but it was still captivating. After that, in episode 37, he did action scenes for both Ishiro and the fake, and I felt like he had come a long way with all the moves he was able to do.
Hayama: You sound like a parent (laughs).
Saito: I'd like to mention that I've rewatched your boxing action with Gong Grumer about six times.
Hayama: Eh?!
Suzuki: Amazing, you've got a fan.
Hayama: Ryu, thank you~ (laughs).
Saito: No, I was just curious about the moves you were doing.
Hayama: I guess everyone was looking at different parts. This is the first time I've heard all of that.
Iuchi: You're embarrassed, huh?
Hayama: I am. Ryu should be the first one I treat to some gyudon, don't you think? (laughs).
Suzuki: For me, it was probably when he was paired up with Mira in episode 14. It's the scene where Chasshiro's desperately struggling to keep Reizoko Grumer from going to the aquarium. I had never seen Chasshiro with such intense passion before. Mira had already transformed, so the first time I saw him like that was during post recording, but it was Yuki-kun's acting that really got me into the mood during recording.
Hayama: It was all thanks to the Screenwriter (laughs).
Suzuki: You looked happy (laughs).
Miyazawa: He was all smiley.
Suzuki: And, I know I keep saying this, but when Chasshiro talks to Mira face to face like a normal person in that episode……seriously, his visuals were just too good.
Hayama: It was both an Ishiro episode and a visual episode.
Soma: Visual episode he says…..(laughs).
Suzuki: And, I guess he was really fired up since it was one of his main episodes, as during filming, he made constant efforts every morning to get rid of any swelling (laughs).
Hayama: You didn't have to bring up that part! (laughs).
Iuchi Saito Soma Miyazawa: (laughs).
"Now for the next turn, we'd like you to talk about scenes featuring Mira Shifuto's Suzuki-san."
Soma: Speaking of Miu-chan, she was a monster during post recording.
Suzuki: Eh? What?
Saito: He means to say "you're very skilled."
Suzuki: For real? That makes me happy!
Saito: How is it that you're always able to skillfully match up your voice?…..
Suzuki: Yay! (laughs).
Hayama: Another thing is the straightforward way in which she communicates. In episode 14, when she said, "You're so stupid, Chasshiro!," I could really feel Mira's energy just from watching the footage, and I felt that there was alot to learn when it came to making emotional outbursts like that.
Suzuki: That makes me happy.
Hayama: I learned a…alot!
Suzuki: Don't stutter at the best part! (laughs).
Hayama: (laughs).
Soma: Yuki-kun mentioned emotions just now, but I liked Miu-chan's part when we spoke our lines one by one before defeating Madrex in episode 9.
Suzuki: When I say, "That's what it means to take control of your own wheel!," right?
Soma: Yeah. Your eyes sparkled, and your line was filled with emotion, so that moment really grabbed me emotionally.
Suzuki: Everyone's injured makeup looked good too.
Soma: That combined with the atmosphere of the setting sun made it even better. Towards the end of the show, when Mira makes up her mind to get married, Me, Sakito and Jou were on the receiving end of things, but we were also greatly helped by her. It was easier to do our performance since we could understand Mira's feelings.
Suzuki: That makes me feel good (laughs).
Iuchi: My favorite Mira scene, and the one where I also thought Miu-chan helped me out, was in episode 45. They had created a rather dark scene in regards to Bundorio's shutdown, and I went into the scene worrying about how to go back to Taiya's usual self within the 30 minutes we had. However, thanks to Miu-chan's performance, I was able to bring Taiya back to his energetic self.
Suzuki: Heh~ I didn't know you felt that way.
Iuchi: Taiya saying, "Thank you, I'm glad you guys are my friends," followed by Mira's genuine look of relief on her face as she said, "You've finally regained control of your wheel," was very comforting. That put me in a better mood as we faced the final episode, so I really feel thankful for that.
Suzuki: No, no, I wouldn't have been able to cry if I hadn't seen the look on Taiya's face. I feel the same way, you really helped me out.
Soma: Are you reciprocating your love to each other?
Suzuki: That's not it (laughs).
Miyazawa: It's the result of their synergy.
Suzuki: That's it!
Miyazawa: I don't have any specific episodes in mind, but rather, when I think of Miu-chan, her persuasive words come to mind. I especially felt that in Mira's main episodes. I think it's Mira who connects the Boonboomgers together, and I think she had a big influence on the production.
Suzuki: That makes me happy.
Miyazawa: What I also thought was interesting was that when I saw Miu-chan on set, she would adjust the number of steps she took in order to match the camera's position.
Suzuki: Yeah, I did that (laughs). I'd usually be good with three steps, and then I'd just say my lines from around there.
Miyazawa: Seeing that up close, I thought of her as a very hard worker. Mira's good balance was likely the result of Miu-chan's hard work.
Suzuki: Thank you!
Saito: This might overlap with Zawa-nii, but while I think that each person had their own main episodes, Mira would be right there next to us.
Iuchi Hayama Suzuki Soma Miyazawa: Yeah!
Saito: When you pair up with someone like that, the explosive power is incredible. How would you describe it? Like an amino acid??
Soma: Something like an umami seasoning that makes everything taste better?
Saito: Ah, that's it! If you don't add it in, it's somewhat tasteless, but with it, I'd say it adds depth and takes it up a level. That's why I think Mira's presence was of great help to our team.
Hayama: Thank you for being an amino acid.
Saito: Thank you amino acid.
Suzuki: I did my best as an amino acid! (laughs).
"Next should be Jou Akuse's Saito-san. What does everyone think?"
Iuchi: What I'd like to mention with Jou is his injured makeup for the baseball episode. The makeup artist told me that a role like Jou's is one that's really deserving of injured makeup.
Hayama: That's true.
Iuchi: The way he got covered in dirt, was sprawled out on the ground, and yet still stood up was really cool.
Suzuki: You know it!
Iuchi: As for Taiya, he's happy to watch Jou's growth, or to put it in a slightly weird way, he likes seeing Jou get dirty (laughs).
Saito: Hahahaha (laughs).
Suzuki: It's kinda nice when Jou gets dirty.
Hayama: It's great.
Iuchi: It looks great on film, doesn't it?
Hayama: Going along with that, I guess I'd pick his first Change in episode 5. The scene where he crawls while still standing his ground is really memorable, don't you think? Boonboomger consists of a group of people who hold various beliefs, but among them, Jou possesses an honest sense of justice, and I think that was most strongly portrayed in episode 5. Watching him on set, I honestly felt like, "Ah, he's a hero."
Miyazawa: I think that out of all the characters in Boonboomger, the one who was closest to their role was Ryu, and there were countless times where I felt that he really linked up with Jou's honest character.
Iuchi: Yeah
Hayama: There were.
Miyazawa: Especially when he was trying to appeal to something. There was something about it that would just resonate with you. The same goes for the Keytarou episode, the scene with Itsuki-kun in episode 40, and the scene against the police squad in episode 46.
Hayama: Episode 40 was especially good!
Miyazawa: When it comes to tearful episodes, I think that most people would pick the one where Genba leaves, but I'd cry every time there was a Jou episode.
Saito: Eh?!
Miyazawa: No, it was frustrating how Ryu's performance made me cry.
Iuchi Hayama Suzuki Soma: (laughs).
Miyazawa: Still, it really touched my heart. I really think that only Saito Ryu could've played the role of Jou Akuse. He's also really good at action. He moves his body well.
Saito: That makes me happy!
Soma: For me, it's the part in episode 28 where he Boonboom Changes while running into the fight against Neon Grumer.
Saito: Yeah, I was filmed wearing a maskless Boonboom suit.
Soma: That maskless facial expression, and the intense passion conveyed through his lines. I guess you could call it a "feeling of hitting the right mark." Zawa-kun mentioned it too, but his honesty resonates with you as you watch him, which is exactly in line with Jou, but I think is the same for Ryu too.
Suzuki: I talk about it in every interview we do, but my pick is always going to be episode 15. His crying face at the end when he took down Kaseki Grumer was heartbreaking, and there's also the scene where Jou makes up his mind.
Saito: It was when he said, "I'll take him down!"
Suzuki: Yeah. Despite feeling conflicted, he said he'd fulfill his duty as a police officer. That was also bittersweet. It was a scene that was really painful to watch.
Saito: My performative skills were still pretty rough during that episode, so I had alot of trouble with it. I think Director Hayama helped me alot in that episode.
Miyazawa: It's usually Jou who gets caught in the middle of a dilemma, don't you think? I guess expressing that is also quite difficult to do.
Saito: Yeah, it was. Every time I'd wonder at what point the conflict between what he wanted to do, what contribution he'd make as a police officer, and what decisions he'd make as a hero would alternate.
"What are some of the most memorable scenes involving Genba Bureki's Soma-san?"
Miyazawa: What should we do?
Suzuki: There's really nothing to say, right?
Soma: Why~?!
Hayama: I guess there's nothing in particular.
Soma: Well, guess I'll head home early then (laughs).
Iuchi Suzuki Saito Miyazawa: (laughs).
Iuchi: Alright then, I'll start! I also like the scene in episode 27, where Genba leaves Boonboomger, but I've talked about it in many other places, so I'll name another scene. I recently had the chance to rewatch the clip of his first Change in episode 7, and I thought the whole sequence of movements, starting with the line, "I'm gonna accelerate you guys," and then raising the Boonboom Change Axe to then pull out the Boonboom Booster was incredibly cool.
Iuchi Suzuki: It was when he said, "(speaking in unison like Genba) Let's take control of the wheel of being Boonboomgers together!"
Saito: A key point is the part where he bounces his hand alittle.
Soma: You were paying attention, huh?
Iuchi: Furthermore, in Genba's case, he isn't characterized by his quick decisions, but by his slippery movements instead.
Soma: Was that……a compliment?
Iuchi: Huh, you don't get it?
Hayama: You're saying his movements are sexy, right?
Iuchi: Right, right, sexy!
Suzuki: Genba's movements had some sex appeal to them.
Iuchi: I could feel his mature sexiness, which is exactly in line with Genba. I felt that again when I rewatched it.
Miyazawa: For me……yeah, I think it'd be the part where he's sucking on a lollipop in the opening credits.
Soma: Why?!
Miyazawa: Sorry, that just sorta came out.
Soma: That's going way too far (laughs).
Miyazawa: That was just a joke (laughs), Genba and Sakito were involved in many scenes, so I had many opportunities to talk with Satoru, and I found him to be a really passionate guy when it came to his performance. In particular, he kept the alien setting a secret. That was the most surprising thing.
Suzuki: Eh, you knew from the start?
Soma: I knew about his real identity, but details like him being an heir of planet Bureki and the Hashiryan invasion came later.
Suzuki: Eh~. Still, you knew from the beginning that he was an alien.
Soma: Yeah, I knew.
Saito: So that's how it was.
Suzuki: Did everyone know?
Hayama: No, I also didn't know.
Soma: I think I mentioned it to Taiya along the way.
Iuchi: I only overheard alittle bit about it.
Suzuki: Heh~!
Miyazawa: Not only did he keep that a secret, but he also kept a clear plan in mind and made sure to express the way Genba "should be" in each and every scene. What was particularly memorable was the expression on Genba's face at the end of episode 26 when he saw Disrace. I thought that he had really brought out the best of everything he had accumulated up until that point. I'll never forget it.
Hayama: From there, Genba left Boonboomger and suffered for awhile, but in the beginning of the next episode where he had come back, Genba had a really refreshed look on his face (laughs).
Suzuki: I noticed that~!
Hayama: I once again thought that that kind of carefree vibe is unique to Genba Bureki.
Suzuki: It was that scene, where the camera pans from his legs to focus on his facial expression.
Hayama: Right. Also, Satoru-kun's scripts were amazing. I could catch a glimpse of them from the post recording microphone next to me, and they'd be completely red. This of course varies from person to person, as I myself am the type who doesn't write many notes, but even so, I was impressed by his enthusiasm to learn.
Soma: I'm just prone to worrying (laughs).
Hayama: They were so red, that it makes me want to post a photo on SNS so that everyone can see.
Iuchi: You really pay attention to the smallest of details.
Saito: Regarding the scene in episode 33 where Genba returns, the Action Director of "Kamen Rider Gavv," who I had the opportunity to speak with at the studio, highly praised it by saying, "The expressions on Taiya and Genba's faces as they stared at each other were really good."
Soma: Eh, really? Should I move over to Gavv's set now?
Iuchi Hayama Saito Miyazawa: (laughs).
Suzuki: Please stop (laughs).
Saito: I'd like to bring up the scene in episode 15, where Jou and Genba talk. At the end, Genba mutters, "A lonely dinosaur, huh?…," and at the time of filming I thought, "What is this line?" When I look back at this scene now, the kind, lonely, and indescribable expression on Satoru-kun's face really hit me.
Suzuki: For me it'd also have to be episode 33, but it's for the scene between Shirabe-san and Genba. I felt like he poured out everything he had been holding back up to that point.
Soma: That's something I discussed with Director Nakazawa Shojiro.
Suzuki: On another occasion, the Director told me, "I told him that it'd be more like Genba to hold back there," but finding the right balance must've been very difficult, right? Mira is someone who can show her emotions, but he won't be the same Genba if he shows too much, and if he holds back too much, it'll seem like he's lost his humanity. After hearing that story, I rewatched the second half of episode 33, where he comes back to us, and was convinced as I thought, "So that's the reason." Something will make his heart tremble, but he won't shed tears, and I think that's appropriate for Genba.
Iuchi: Come to think of it, Yu-kun mentioned his identity being revealed, but is it okay if I add something quick?
Miyazawa: Go ahead!
Iuchi: At a later date, Satoru-kun told me why he only revealed it to me, that being, "I think Taiya would've already noticed." Just hearing that…no, he really thinks about the details of details.
Suzuki: That's Amazing!
Soma: Not at all.
Iuchi: What's more, at that time, the details hadn't been worked out yet, but when I read the script for episode 27, Chasshiro asks, "Did you know?," to which Taiya replies, "I had a feeling he wasn't an Earthling," so it was just as Satoru-kun had predicted.
Suzuki: I see!
Iuchi: Satoru-kun is amazing, even though it wasn't his role, he thought Taiya already noticed.
Hayama: How do you even think that far ahead?!
Iuchi: Right? It's really amazing.
Soma: It's embarrassing.
"Finally, there's Sakito Homura's Miyazawa-san."
Hayama: After all, he has the longest acting career out of all of us, so I was always inspired by him.
Iuchi: No, seriously. With that being that case, it'll be hard trying to narrow it down to just one thing.
Hayama: My favorite scene was without a doubt the one at the beginning of episode 29. I had created my performance to a certain extent and took it to the set, but then Sakito started doing moves that I would've never expected (laughs).
Suzuki: You were like, "Wait, this isn't what I had in mind!" (laughs).
Hayama: That's how I felt. Still, I thought that if I became intimidated here, I'd lose to Zawa-kun, so I tried a variety of things on my own. I think it was one of the opportunities for me to grow as an actor, and it's a scene that left a very strong impression on me.
Miyazawa: If we were at the Deliverer's garage like normal, you could imagine what you'd be like, but with filming on location, you don't really know until you get there. In my case, I was pretty much doing things in the moment.
Iuchi: When I got involved with Yu-kun, that's where I'd really learn something. If I'm not mistaken, the scene where we're all talking and having fun in the final episode was also changed on set.
Suzuki: Eh, is that true?
Iuchi: I talked it over with Yu-kun, and he asked me something along the lines of if I wanted to be the "first to respond," but with Sakito, I thought words were unnecessary, so I just tapped my fist against his chest and said, "I'm counting on you" ……I said that just before the take, right?
Miyazawa: That's right.
Iuchi: I really liked the look on Sakito's face in that scene, and thanks to that, Taiya felt like, "Now Earth is in good hands," and even though it was done on the spot, Yu-kun responded perfectly in his performance.
Miyazawa: I think I was able to respond because there was something about Haruhi's performance that resonated with me.
Soma: Even without any lines, Sakito was able to convey the message he wanted to say. That was also the case with the sumo episode, and I learned alot from watching it.
Miyazawa: I'm grateful.
Soma: Genba himself isn't a character with many lines, so when he was silent, I would just look at everyone's expressions, but even in those moments, I felt that Zawa-kun had a wide range of performative skills to draw from.
Saito: I was impressed by his interactions with Byundi. He was constantly talking with Suit Actor Takada Masashi-san, as well as BoonViolet's Tsuta-san, but seeing him talk all the time, even when the cameras weren't on, taught me how to approach acting.
Miyazawa: I'm sure this is true for everyone, but this was the first time I interacted with a Suit Character and performed a role together with a Suit Actor. With that being the case, I think we each had our own ideas of, "What I'd do if I were you," and I wanted to present a character that matched that of BoonViolet, and by extension, Sakito Homura.
Suzuki: Sakito has a childlike charm, a presence that makes everyone tremble easily, and a unique sex appeal, and while we were shown various sides of him, there's a sense of unity that made him look like a proper individual. I think that's what Zawa-kun put into consideration when playing the role of Sakito.
Miyazawa: That makes me happy. Let's all go out for yakiniku next time.
Iuchi Hayama Saito Soma: Yay!
Suzuki: We've been waiting for that!
Miyazawa: Ah! Is that what you guys were after?! (laughs).
-The six people who finished Boonboomger-
"I think it's time we conclude, but we'd like to ask each of you one last time for your thoughts on the past year."
Iuchi: It was fun.
Hayama: It was, wasn't it?
Suzuki: Wait, wait, hold on (laughs).
Soma: Isn't that too short?
Suzuki: It is!
Saito: Well, it is true that it was fun…
Miyazawa: No, stop, speak one at a time, let's do this properly.
Hayama: We got along well with each other over the past year, and I of course hope that we can continue to be friends, but when I see the five of them, I feel like I've learned so much as an actor. In that sense, what was great about being a Boonboomger was that I was able to gain some really good experience for my future acting career by working together with these five people. I realize I'm talking seriously now, but I'm truly happy that I got to meet these five actors.
Suzuki: I'm truly happy from the bottom of my heart that I was apart of these six, and I hope that even after 10 or 20 years have passed, our current relationship will continue. They're my best friends.
Hayama: If something ever happens, us five will be there for you.
Suzuki: That's reassuring!
Saito: Miu-chan summed up everything just now. I thought the same thing after finishing filming, but I think it was actually a good thing. I would've hated it if any one of us was missing, and I honestly feel that the hard work we all put in over the past year was well worth it.
Suzuki: It's kinda sad that it's over…
Soma: On the very day of the wrap up, I think I was relaxed, as I thought, "Ah, it's over~," but when we actually wrapped up, I was so overwhelmed with emotion, that it surprised even myself.
Miyazawa: It was more than you were expecting, huh? I'm surprised.
Soma: Over the past year, I really saw alot of what I liked about everyone, and it was also really exciting when Zawa-kun joined us halfway through. I really think that the balance between these six people is outstanding, and I think we became such a great team because of all the wonderful qualities everyone has. Thank you so much!
Suzuki: Encountering you all and the time we spent together was irreplaceable, and it'll stay with me for the rest of my life.
Miyazawa: I arrived along the way, where I ended up joining a team already consisting of five people, but they were five truly charming people. We got along well in the drama and in our daily lives, and there was so much that I learned from them, so I want to be the first to say how grateful I am that we were able to do this together for a year. And, while this may be the end of Boonboomger, I hope that each one of us will take the experience we've gained from this production to the next level, and that one day, when the time comes for "all these members to gather," we'll already be capable of aiming higher and attract the attention of many people. That's why I hope you'll still support us and continue to carefully watch over us.
"And now, we'd like to ask Iuchi-san for some closing remarks."
Iuchi: Is it alright if it's abit long?
Hayama Suzuki Saito Soma Miyazawa: Of course!
Iuchi: Boonboomger was my first drama job, and I played the main role of Red. Super Sentai productions are a team effort, so I didn't want to get too worked up about being known as the star or leader. However, in interviews I was often asked, "What's your enthusiasm as the leader?," and in the beginning, I'd go into the set being 90% anxious and 10% excited. Also, I'm the type of person who values spending time alone, and while I don't know if there were moments where they didn't think well of me, everyone accepted me for who I was and treated me in a really kind and friendly manner, so I have nothing but gratitude for that. Recently, I've had more opportunities to hear people say to me, "You've grown in the past year," and while I think that's only natural due to how I interacted with people on set and how the staff guided me when I didn't know anything, the most important thing was that I received so much from everyone I performed with. That said, I do think I've grown over the past year. We were all talking about it before this interview, but even after it's over, I sincerely hope from the bottom of my heart that we can get together regularly afterwards to talk about casual things and spend time together. Finally, I have a confession…….I came to Tokyo by myself for this job, and these five are the first friends I made! Let's continue to get along well!
Hayama Suzuki Saito Soma Miyazawa: That makes us happy!
71 notes · View notes
tanicus-caesareth · 10 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
guarana drama, damage control
18 notes · View notes
hewhobreathesfire · 7 days ago
Text
I'm going to defenestrate myself
2 notes · View notes
Text
the worst part of break is the last day when you're just drowning in stress thinking about going back. i feel literally physically nauseous
#the stupidest part is that i'm so fucking stressed mostly about my fucking FILM class#more than any of my honors courses#i haven't done enough work in it at all and i'm so embarrassed about it so i don't want to start working on it and show how little i have#done so i get even more behind#i have a film i have to make and it's only half done and now i can't fucking find it in my files cuz i'd planned on working on it this brea#but i got sick and wasted 4 days of my already stupidly short break#i have TWO whole presentations on an actor and a director and i don't CARE or know about any actors or directors#i just feel sick#i wish i could drop it or just fucking fail it but i can't#it's so so stupid#i'm never gonna be able to take another class with that teacher from the fucking shame i feel actually horrible every time i go in her clas#and the worst part is that it's literally my fault i could have just done the fucking work and i didn't#kiwifae says shit#ugh okay this made me feel better i need to just figure out my actor director presentations (which are my fucking final btw 😭)#i accept the shit grade i'm getting on the film i can fix it if i make decent presentations i'm just mad i'm doing bad and getting so#stressed over a dumbass extra class like film production like what#i still don't think i can take another class with her she's really pleasant but i just feel so so sick whenever i go in there cuz i feel so#guilty#which is a shame cuz she teaches photography which i would really like to take#maybe senior year idk i might not care anymore then#also i'm aware this isn't a normal amount of shame and anxiety just for procrastinating i just feel super bad abt this for some reason#sorry for ranting but i'm just blehhhhhhh rn#ok i'm gonna get something to eat and take a shower maybe i'll feel less like i'm dying#👍
9 notes · View notes
keeps-ache · 10 months ago
Text
brrrba pa pa da de do ♩
#just me hi#i wanna work on my stuff..#i also need to figure out the vram on my computer because i will die without my viddy games..#//oo a cat has arrived#she likes to sit on my lap while i'm using it so i'm restricted to just writing or watching videos sometimes lol :)#//but yeah i wanna work on pi.e :1#i think i should have a reason for not doing it but i just don't have one lol#just can't i guess. hmm#//been very loud recently - i both need more and more music but also i need to just repeat the current recents until they're burnt into the#grooves of my brain hfhsh#can't make up my mind so i'm on autoplay rn :3#i like lesbian songs they're probably my favorite genre lmao <33#also that generic mall rock sound. i am in Love with those hgbfhs :D#//hm i also wanna start some shows#i'll get to it eventually :)#//oh i still need to learn to make chicken alfredo pasta#i have Got to do thattt#//and aside from generic mall rock sounds i like that 'vaguely sounds like it's coming from a tin can' sound hfhs#a very tinny + strained sound if you know what i mean#that and that solid soft smooth sound#i can't explain that one in any other way but it's like the concept of that high-end plastic they use for kids' toys but Fuzzy and Soft#//i think i also need to go to the lake lol#it's just that kinda time. send me to the wortor#one of my favorite spots because when you get real far out there nobody even bothers to swim out towards you hbfhsv#/i think moats should be more popular these days. because they're neat :3#//anywho i'm gonna devote the next 15 minutes to exchanging gifs with apollo again lmao#we did this the other day because i wouldn't stop sending cat exploding gifs. so now neither of us can stop hgbhfsbf#he just sent me zuckerberg i gotta go- Ciao !!
5 notes · View notes
unproduciblesmackdown · 2 years ago
Text
that moment when: everyone's lives are restricted and constricted and these imposed consequences are attributed to anyone's continual individual failures to seek, find, and follow the Correct Path through Life, and so everyone is left on their own to only be seeking & finding these failures as well as the only answer to how their lives can be better....versus Not seeing the world as the free marketplace meritocracy of everyone's personal failures/successes, nor everything in your own life, and thus not forever having to scrutinize Where You Must Be Bringing It Upon Yourself by fucking up or at least failing to do the correct thing, and exist only in perpetual punishment for your ongoing failure and occasional temporary reprieves from it. recognizing everything that wasn't & isn't & wouldn't be [this is because you're bringing it upon yourself] and thus having more capacity & capability to look at the realm of your personal individual self, reality, experiences, life through the perpetual instances of seeking, finding, and following your own needs/wants through one's inherent personhood and exercises of autonomy and recognition of where & when & how one recognizes moments of their existing freely & in more resonant genuine alignment with themself, you know? endless examples to be found in endless fractals of [where & how are people's lives made smaller]. and that of course this doesn't preclude the ability/option at any time to question one's choices, since you'll be able to find more Actual choices available to you (and, also crucially, find more actual choices made by others that are in the pursuit of limiting Yours) to look at, and people getting to exercise their autonomy isn't the same as "everyone doing anything they want regardless of how it affects others" since that [how does it affect others?] element instead being Regarded would be able to lead to recognizing that, in fact, an effect might be the infringement on others' autonomy, hence: There's A Problem....like the ability to just go ham with [questioning???] anything in existence, certainly including oneself, b/c the "norm" is such that rather you're only supposed to be able to question yourself for your failings (or those positioned as less than, thus, beneath you) and not even have the language to express a questioning of aspects of life beyond that b/c stop calling anyone "cis" they're just Normal, Just Be Normal and it would all be fine
#brought to you by: i think one of my feelings lately of A Shift is in my less than ever running this like continuous background function of#looking for Thee Answer (just like the black suits) in any & everything that could serve as the Key to like. whatever could fit into place#to like set things on a [hell yeah. life? better] path. juxtaposing this recent sense of things with the [lol. in retrospect i Do see a new#context wherein i can Recognize smthing abt myself] past going on of like. granpa greentext story be me be fifteen i'm in college b/c i hat#school i also mostly assumed i'd probably fail out freshman yr but didn't. i've never known what i'd wanna major in & as a sophomore i'm de#supposed to figure it out in time for scheduling my jr yr classes (though Ideally have known from the start / been scheduling thusly) & so#many evenings during dinner i'm furiously perusing the daily print news as i've been doing for some yrs to Keep Up W/Current Events but now#also consciously like ''boy i hope in the course of doing this i stumble across some info that sparks some eureka moment of Getting what my#major should Obviously be so i can understand the rest of my life around [do job] b/c i sure as hell don't understand it around [be married#much less [be parent] so one option remains obvi'' whereas now i realize like lol you Were figuring out a guiding light in doing so & that#perspective being honed was one of Having A Political Analysis times....which also provides another Example of [only being able to interpre#what makes your life & your world the way it is: via Your Personal Failures to have already Had Better] in that just like i often forget i#misguidedly (but also reasonably; clearly also using & seeking that autonomy & freedom) tried to have a better existence within the#situation i was in by Coming Out As Trans to parents via an email that was then not directly discussed ever; b/c any legitimate discussion#was not permissible like how so many matters of [supposed correct existence] are Unspeakable so as to be Unquestionable#languaging that succeeds & sustains itself having to be expansive / flexible / creative / evolving too. Making Up Words hell yes#anyways so i also forget i Did try to propose majoring in things that Did more approach what i was suspecting were things i'd wanna do#but even the first like expression of anything on the periphery of that was met with ''no you'd hate it b/c you'd have to deal w/Stupid Ppl#every day'' (by which was meant; with believed inherent synonymity: poor people) & then i also will oft forget i pushed for it any further#which i Know i did b/c of it next being met with angry & aggressive ''i've never heard you talk abt that interest before So''#(wonder why? withholding info to protect yourself=finding room in one's life for existing more freely; exercising the autonomy to Do That)#but it's easy to forget b/c The All Encompassing Perspective was rather [i'm sure Failing to just Know my major for the sole possibility fo#defining one's entire life: The Correct Dream Job] & then Failing to push it or just express it & be understood ''correctly'' even if i Did#have any ideas in that realm. vs seeing how i Was succeeding & was recognizing shit & pursuing it & looking out for myself & etccc#it's undeniable lol like the framing even that Blaming Oneself is an autonomy seeking response. b/c your autonomous power in your own life#sure Would be more immediate if Everything Really Was Your Fault (when ofc really this is abt obscuring & denying the responsibility of ppl#who have the power over others' lives & then have to act like this is all the fault of the Others; they themselves have never Truly Chosen)#no victim blaming no condemnation of anyone's ''passivity'' here babey#re: the undeniability it's how like. maybe you've only Just realized you're not cis but in doing so it's like ''oh That's what i already#recognizing in various ways throughout my whole life'' it's all always Been there/going on & perspex shifts + new lenses can reveal them
4 notes · View notes
trashyandtiredsol · 1 year ago
Text
The jist of my fainting experience in the tags here!! Long as hell
Feel free to tell me more about it
#the first one which was actually 2 was one right after the other#i was in the shower scrubbing my hair and was doing it a bit rough since I had major lice at the time (don't have it anymore thank god!!)#the water definitely was a bit on the to warm a little warmer than what I like#so as I'm doing that I fuckin fainted#hit the side of my neck on the faucet#it was kinda like I was dreaming during the fainting part#i don't remember falling at all and next thing I know im laying down in the shower#my mom asked if I was okay and I said I was then I finished up and stepped out of the shower#then I fuckin fainted again!!! my mom heard me fall again and came back in the bathroom#don't remember falling aljust remember next thing I know I was on the floor#mom called an ambulance and turnes out I scratched my back on a box that was next to the shower tub combo we had#it scarred and idk how the fuck I ended up hitting it since when I woke back up I was next to it not on my side and it wasn't knocked over#then a while after that was the next fainting time!!#so I hadn't eaten that day or drank anything cuz I was scared to go out of my room whenever my then father figure was around#he was a real fucking ass and greedy as shit for my mom's money since he gambled all his away#they fought a fuck ton#now my mom#brother#and i don't live there anymore and don't have any contact with him#yay!!!#anyway so I didn't eat or drink anything that day#so it was dinner time and my mom called me out of my room for dinner and I walked out waited for her to give me my plate#and so I was kinda walking around just moving around#then I started getting dizzy#told mom#then I was sat down at the table#my non bio brothers and bio brother were in there room eating or gaming#then my fingers cramped up MAJORLY#then I fainted then I woke up then I was moved to the couch and crying and I felt like I couldn't open my eyes and my fingers were still#cramped then the ambulance came and i was able to open my eyes on the way to hospital and my fingers weren't cramped anymore!!!
10K notes · View notes
talkorsomething · 27 days ago
Text
Me when everything is hard & i know why and i just have to get over myself But Also
#you are Disabled#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#trying to apply for jobs again and giving up halfway through cause . how do i explain any of it#would i even get hired now#COULD i even get hired if i went to a vocational rehab place now#but what happens if everything goes under? what can i even do about it?#clearly something in the now if i stopped being... the way that i am but can i stop having to do it scared for 99% of the things in my life#? please??#the everything else is also bad cause i procrastinated all day so ... no dance warmups now and a very half assed stretch#when COMPETITIONS are LITERALLY ALMOST HERE in just a few more days!! why cant i be better!!!#why cant i do the things that are supposed to be easy!!!#also idk the process so i'm not sure i would even get diagnosed ? with anything?? like yes it's uhm. obvious that i am not Normal#but i don't think it's in like a way ?#then again i dont go outside so i wouldnt really know anyways#... people in guard did definitely treat me a little weird last year (i never got to go to awards) ((i wanted to))#i dunno. anyways. interviews hard. job applications hard. figuring out vocational rehab ... also hard#&& the state of the politics means like... well idk but i'm not too sure that voc. rehab COULD help me get anywhere y'know?#personal life dragging itself on still but i'm Aware of how much... confidence? ability to communicate effectively? i've lost#or ability to exist in spaces i mean. idk#then again i've always been nervous to be On My Own it's just ... maybe more obvious now that im older. not so normal (if it ever was)
0 notes
cloverapple · 1 month ago
Text
How I Shift On Command + How You Can Too
I don’t plan on posting anything other than this or starting a blog, so I don’t need anyone to “believe” in me. The only person you should trust is yourself—trust yourself to resonate positively with what you see online and click away if it doesn’t serve you. This is here for you to take from if it resonates. I literally only made this blog to post this here. My hope is that it reaches at least one person who can take something from this and apply it to their shifting journey. If not, and this post ends up here untouched, I’m just glad to finally get everything down in words and off my chest. 
Jumping straight to the answer because I’m not going to make anyone sit through a long post for it. The rest, the "advice," is here if you want to read it.
The "method"
I figured out what works specifically for me as an individual instead of following everyone else’s journey. Everyone has their “thing” that makes shifting click, a sweet spot that makes reality shifting possible. For me, it’s a combination of the law of assumption and inducing an altered state of consciousness.
During the day, I spend time affirming—or sometimes just reminding myself or keeping a little note nearby—things like:
I can shift.
I know how to shift.
I could shift tonight.
Shifting is accessible to me.
At night, I watch videos, look at Pinterest boards, or listen to music that reminds me of my DR. This ingrains where I’m going in my brain. Sometimes I do this for fun, and other times I skip it entirely.
When I lay down, I always lie on my back and stay somewhat still because I like the feeling of my body going numb. This isn’t necessary to shift, but I enjoy it—it lets me feel the symptoms of hypnagogia (that in-between state of wakefulness and sleep).
To meditate quickly, I count from 1 to 100 with a few affirmations in between to remind myself of what I’m doing. I do this until my body goes numb, and I start messing up the counting. Usually, the mistakes or random, nonsensical thoughts are my signal to start shifting.
At this point, I begin affirming the things I affirmed during the day:
I could shift right now.
I have the ability to shift.
I have the power to shift at any moment.
While I do this, I focus on the feeling of being in my DR—not my surroundings, not my senses, just the internal feeling of being there.
This is where “brazen impudence” comes in. I hard-force myself to feel like I’m in my DR. It’s not about imagining my surroundings but purely about embodying the feeling of being there.
Hypnagogic imagery and sensations like floating often kick in at this point. These are symptoms of your body falling asleep so your awareness can take shape in that sweet spot for shifting.
I continue this, then stop and start counting from 1 to 100 again, with affirmations like:
I can shift.
I know how to shift.
I could shift right now.
Then I repeat the process: using brazen impudence to force myself to feel like I’m in my DR.
Eventually, I reach that threshold between sleep and wake—a liminal state of pure consciousness. Body asleep, mind awake, I call this the “rabbit hole” which is honstly just a deep state of hypnogogia. It’s a state where anything is possible: lucid dreaming, astral projection, slipping into the void, shifting—anything.
When I’m in this state, I use brazen impudence to force myself to feel like I'm shifting to my DR and don't take no for an answer (I tell myself I'm in Barbados and shut the door in my own face). This can involve affirmations or just talking myself through it, either way I wake myself up there. Occasionally, I simply relax, expect to wake up in my DR, fall asleep, and wake up shifted.
Does all that sound complicated? Let me simplify:
Lay down and get comfortable.
Count from 1 to 100 on a loop with affirmations in between until you mess up the counting, get sleepy, or have your mind wander. Like this:
Me: *counts from 1 - 100* Me: *says a few affirmations/askfirmations* Me: *counts from 1 - 100* Me: *says a few affirmations/askfirmations*
On a loop until...
Persist in the feel of being in your DR—not focusing on surroundings or senses, just the feeling. Feeling is the secret.
Alternate between steps 2 and 3 until you’re in that relaxed body asleep/mind awake state, OR just straight up hypnogogia tbh. (That is, if you don’t already shift lol)
From there, choose what feels right: shift from a lucid dream, affirm, slip into the void, or just feel yourself in your DR like I do, convince yourself that either you shifted and are there, or are shifting and will end up there.
One thing I’ll tell you now—regardless of your circumstances, how long you’ve been trying, how long it’ll take, who you are, etc—is that you already know how to shift. You, reading this right now. You know how to shift, and there’s nothing you did to learn it. There’s nothing you can do to unlearn it. It’s something that will stay with you until the end of time.
Why do you think people shift randomly without prior knowledge of shifting? Even people who don’t believe in it? It’s because everyone can shift. You can shift.
Right now, stop reading this post and say in your head or out loud, “I already know how to shift.” Or, if that doesn’t feel right, “I already have the ability to shift,” “No matter what, I have the power to shift,” or “My mind knows how to shift no matter what.”
Can you argue that? No, you can’t. And if your mind starts throwing out “buts,” go back and read that again.
Shifting isn’t difficult, and no one struggles to shift. I’m sure you’ve heard it before—that shifting is simple and happens in seconds—because it does. You don’t struggle with shifting. You can shift; everyone has the power to. What you “struggle” with, so to speak, is figuring out what works for you, what your brain likes, how it operates—because everyone is different.
What ended up working for me more than anything was figuring out how I operate and modifying shifting to fit me—not forcing myself to fit shifting.
Will my method work for everyone? I have no idea. Unless you assume it will work for you, this is what works for me. I’m me, and you’re you.
Before you say “Oh, but I’ve tried everything and nothing has worked so far” and expect me to sit here and ask you “but have you really tried everything? <3” , listen to me. 
I could shift perfectly well with my own personal method before I started shifting regularly. I knew it worked well for my brain, but the thing that “blocked” me (so to speak) were my assumptions. 
When you sit there and say “I’ve tried everything and nothing has worked” that’s your assumption about yourself. You believe that nothing works for you, that you don't know how to shift, that you’re this powerless, lost baby shifter who needs guidance. 
There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s not your fault, and theoretically you could shift even with your “blockages” (I really hate that term), as shifting waits for no one.
This is why so many people shift randomly and with poor assumptions without meaning to. But you clicked on this because you want to know how you can shift consistently + on every time, and this is the answer I’m giving you. 
You find out what works better for you, be it affirming, visualizing, scripting, shifting awake, shifting asleep, shifting with hypnagogia, shifting with hypnopompic, shifting through lucid dreams, shifting with brazen impudence, through SATs, robotic affirming, through letting go, through putting your DR on a pedestal, through listening to music, through law of assumption alone, and many more. 
If that sounds overwhelming, please note that all of these are the same vehicles that get you to your destination. Just in different shapes and colors. Like how some people drive a car, others drive a motorcycle, others walk, others swim. The movement forward is always the same. 
What you’re doing, no matter how you’re doing it or in whatever state of consciousness you’re doing it from, will always be:
Assume it's true, feel it, receive it. “Assume and persist,” “ground yourself in the assumption,” you’ve heard it all before. 
How to Find What Makes You Shift On Command
You could either test different techniques (affirmations, visualizations, scripting, lucid dreaming, etc.) and see what feels natural to you. 
You could (and I love this one because it’s a cheat code) Assume you already know what works, and let the law of assumption guide you. “Manifest it” so to speak. 
Pay attention to your life, because you already shift on command, you've been doing it your whole life, but I guarantee you haven't noticed it. Pay attention to you, like how easily you slip into hypnagogia, your dream recall, or how strong your intuition is, maybe you put too much emotion into a scenario you don’t want in your life and it inherently manifests, things like that. Pay attention to the thing that makes you go “huh, that was weird”
“But Clover, I tried everything you mentioned above and still haven’t found my method!” 
My darling. Listen up. Come closer—I’m about to let you in on a secret. The way you apply the law of assumption isn’t one-size-fits-all, because assumptions and beliefs are not linear. It's the same every time, yes, it's a law. But just like you, the way you can use it is unique to each person.
Let me tell you how easy it is so you don't think I'm over-complicating it
You could, for instance, believe you’ve got $1000 in your bank account right now and act like it, fully living in the end. Or you could believe you’re going to have $1000 in your account and act like it’s already on its way. Or maybe you believe something’s going to happen that’ll bring you that $1000.
The same applies to shifting. It’s been a game changer for me. I used to struggle so much with things like:
“You’re already in your DR, just act like it.”
“Ignore the 3D.”
“You’ve already shifted.”
Do those methods work? Absolutely, they work beautifully. But like I said, if it doesn’t feel good or true to you, don’t force it.
My dearest, darling reader. If the story you see in your 3D is that you can’t shift, can’t find what makes you shift, are you just going to sit there and accept it? What is more satisfying? Think with me here: accepting that you don’t know how to shift and cannot shift, or persisting that you do know how to shift? 
“Clover, but I’ve been trying for 4 years! I’ve tried everything and I still haven’t shifted”
So that's your story? Your story, your assumption is that you’ve been trying for 4 years and haven’t shifted? If you’ve resonated with the phrase above, that’s your story. And there’s nothing wrong with it, but! there will be no magic solution for shifting. Or a magic method. Or a person like me giving you advice, that can make you shift without you changing your assumptions first.
“But I don’t want to reprogram my mind! It doesn’t work for me. I don’t want to do robotic affirming 24/7, I want results now!” 
I know, right? It’s annoying having to do these 100-step methods, and drink charged water, and have to beg the universe for your desire, and loop affirmations in your mind that directly contradict what you’re experiencing in the 3D.
“Oh ignore the 3D, the 4D is your only real imagination!” they say, as you sit there, clutching your phone, rocking back and forth in bed, repeating affirmations you don’t resonate with while dreaming of being railed by your S/O.
Believe me, I've been there, wondering what the hell was wrong with me. I asked myself why couldn't these basic steps that worked for everyone else work for me. I blamed myself for not trying hard enough, for being lazy, for inconsistent. When all that time, the answer was me. I needed to manifest/shift in a way that felt good for me.
Just remember, the law of assumption isn't complicated, and the way you apply it is not one-size-fits-all. Reprogramming the mind through continuous repetition and affirmation works, and if that resonates with you or feels effective, you should absolutely go for it.
However, at its core, you don’t inherently need to reprogram your mind. It’s as simple as assuming your mind has already been reprogrammed and watching it unfold before your eyes. You do what feels right to you.
For example, if person A does better with visualization and listening to music, why on earth are they affirming and listening to subliminals?
If person B feels better scripting in a notebook, why the hell are they reprogramming their mind?
If person C feels good reprogramming their mind, why are they taking the simple route?
Funny, isn't it? Which is why if you've read all of this so far, and you have not resonated with it, just click away. Go find another post or advice that feels true to you. The words I'm writing right now are not universal, they're not the absolute truth. That's the beauty of the law of assumption. Whatever you believe to be true, becomes true.
I didn’t feel good with the affirmations “I’m already in my DR” and “I already shifted.” Do they work, are they true? Yup, but I didn’t feel good ignoring the 3D, even when I knew the 4D was the true reality. So I swapped them for affirmations like "I'm shifting to my DR", “I’m going to shift to my DR”, swapping things like “I already shifted” to “I’m shifting” because those are the kinds of affirmations my brain loves. 
I've heard a silly bit of misinfo that these affirmations stating future events put you in an infinite loop, and that they don’t make you achieve your desire. That’s not true? At all? Makes me laugh, really. Because here I am, “master shifter” or whatever name people give it in this reality, shifting as much as I want to wherever I want with these types of affirmations.
Yet here I see every day on the internet, people implanting stubborn little rules and regulations to a practice that has been done for ages, a universal law that will work even when you don’t care for it to work. 
How I Shifted The First Time
The law of assumption is what made me shift in the end. Initially, I surprised myself at the beginning of my shifting journey because I shifted three months after starting it. I woke up one morning in my DR room, felt it was real, knew it was possible, but accidentally shifted back because it was too good to be true. 
What followed was a period of losing my mind; I shift back to my DR for a few seconds (mini-shifts), fully shifted to different rparallel ealities, and filled the hell out of shifting journals with my discoveries as I went along. But I never fully shifted to my DR and stayed there. I wanted to permashift. I was so focused on leaving my CR and going to my DR permanently, frustrated because I knew I could shift, knew how to in theory, but was stuck in this endless loop of assuming I couldn't make myself shift and had to rely on spontaneous shifts.
And then one night it clicked when I was reflecting on the law of assumption and reality shifting. I knew shifting was real. I knew I could shift. Everyone can shift. I had shifted before. I would continue to shift even if I gave up on shifting. I could shift that night if I wanted to. I could shift that night even if I didn't want to. I knew how to shift. And so do you.
These are all assumptions I went to sleep with in mind, laying there, feeling like an idiot as it all clicked for me. 
If there was no doubt in my mind that I could shift that night, why wouldn’t I be able to shift? 
What followed was an overwhelming sense of peace washing over me. I let go. What more was there to be done? I could shift. There was no crying or screaming that could make me shift more than I could right then. 
I laid there and started my process. Just like I mentioned earlier. I began counting from 1 - 100 on a continuous loop. With affirmations that I could shift, I knew how to shift , I could shift that night.
And then I reached hypnagogia, and began inducing the feeling of being in my DR, just like I mentioned earlier. That liminal space rabbit hole shortly followed. I could go anywhere I wanted then. I could lucid dream. I could astral project. I could slip into the void. I could shift, and I did. Just…letting go and inducing the feeling of being in my DR. Not the surroundings, not the 5 senses, no affirmations. Just knowing that I was in my Dr. 
It was peaceful. 
I was at ease. 
And then I was woken up by a violent crack of thunder because my dumbass scripted my DR wakeup scenario to be in the middle of spring, and it was raining -_- 
I woke up in my DR, fully grounded, fully there, pinching my skin purple because I couldn't believe I was looking out the window at my DR city.
I wish I could tell you that I remained cool, but I so didn’t. I sat in bed for a good 10 minutes, mouth agape, repeating “oohh fuck it’s real….ohhh my god it’s real…whaaat the hell.” 
And then I paced around my room panicking, giggling like an idiot, checking my DR phone because all my friends and DR life was on there as evidence, opening drawers, looking at myself in the mirror, and straight-up freaking out. 
What followed after that was incredible, something I lack the words to describe. I spent a few weeks in my DR before shifting back, spending a few weeks here and then shifting back–here, back, here, back and forth, spending more time in my DR then my CR to the point where I consider my DR my true reality, and this one as my “other” reality. 
I shifted back here in early December of last year, and I’m here now before I shift back permanently—meaning, I’ll shift there, and then the next time I shift will be to another DR or a waiting room somewhere in the multiverse. I’m taking a "break" so to speak and hanging out here until events I scripted in my DR start to happen, and my life changes (positively, all good things I assure). 
I’m not sure if the person or people who find this post will care, but my other reality was originally called my “Witch DR”, where, as the name suggests, I’m a witch :) But not the fun kind, with a broomstick, a cauldron, and a pet cat though 😂The kind where I have to be up early for work in the mornings, can’t keep a cat because the building I live in doesn’t allow it, and have more responsibilities there than I do in this reality. 
One thing I didn’t expect about shifting before I lived there the first time is that—it’s life. You will have good days. You will have bad days. You will fuck up. You will laugh so hard that soda comes out of your nose. You will cry more than you ever have. And the people you once saw on a TV screen are very real, and can be very annoying lol. I miss my DR friends dearly right now, but I can’t go poking around the internet for videos and pictures of them because it feels so weird. 
Gut feelings are strange. I use them as a compass in both realities whenever I have to manually flap the butterfly’s wings and take a route. I felt compelled to write this post, and I’m not sure why. But if what this post has the power to help one singular person and help them realize their power, I'll be beyond happy.
4K notes · View notes
dollfacefantasy · 4 months ago
Text
kinktober day 20 - size kink jason todd x fem!reader cw: nsfw (18+), smut, p in v, size kink, tummy bulge
Tumblr media
"That's it, baby. Take it all. Oh, look at you go. Being so brave for me."
On the surface the words are soothing, but the tone of Jason's voice fills each syllable with condescension. Not in a bad way. The sickly sweet lilt strikes the perfect chord that has you wetter than any body of water on this earth.
Your hips rise and fall in measure rolls, your cunt embracing his thick cock with every motion. You have to take it slow. Otherwise, you feel like you'll tear yourself in half.
"Jay…" you whimper, lip wobbling and eyes gleaming with the need for him to coddle you, "You're so…"
A sharp whine from your throat cuts off your own words. Your head tilts back and then hangs forward. His tip brushes your sweet spot every time you sink down on him. It makes it nearly impossible to remain coherent. You'd never met somebody who could make you malfunction like this.
"I'm so what?" he coos, prompting you to finish your statement. He already knew the words on the tip of your tongue, but he still wanted to hear them spoken into the drafty air of your apartment.
"You're so big," you choke out.
Another moan falls from your lips before you grit your teeth. Your face scrunches up in tandem with your walls clenching around his length. Vaguely, you hear him chuckle. He then pulls you close and cradles you against his chest.
"And you like that, don't you?" he whispers.
He slumps further down on the couch. His feet press hard against the smooth wooden floor beneath the two of you. The muscles in his thighs flex as he begins to pump his hips up and down. You whine and clutch at his meaty bicep, melting against his warm skin and letting him do all the work right now.
You nearly forget he asked a question at all until he continues speaking.
"I know you do, doll. You like that when you're with me, you're helpless. Don't have to think. Don't have to move. Don't have to do anything but let me use this sweet, little pussy till I'm satisfied," he says.
Your toes curl, your thighs clamping around his own. The pressure doesn't stop him from moving though, not in the slightest. You inhale sharply before nodding against his neck. Of course, you like this. You love it.
You could never get enough of Jason's body. You'd study it forever if he let you. Your pupils felt magnetized whenever they had the chance to drift along his chiseled torso or mentally map the pathways of his scars. Adoration wasn't a strong enough word for how you felt in regards to his figure. Obsession seemed more appropriate.
Fortunately for you, Jason behaved much the same about your body.
In the mornings when he thought sleep still had a strong hold on you, he'd run his fingers over every curve he could find. He'd knead the swell of your ass and press tender kisses between your shoulder blades. As you'd start to wake, he'd wrap his hands around your waist and nearly pop a boner right then and there from how large they looked in comparison.
His favorite thing in the world after a long grueling patrol fast became coming home to you. Not even thirty minutes with your delicate body washed away all the stress caused by hard and rough people he dealt with beyond these walls. Some nights he'd prop your dainty legs over his broad shoulders and dive into your slippery cunt. Other nights he'd get right down to it, shoving his fat cock inside you and watching your belly bulge with the intrusion.
Tonight hadn't been either of those. He'd been home for a change. But having you curled up to his side and pressed against him while he read a book got him worked up pretty fast. It wasn't his fault the two of you just seemed to fit so naturally together.
"My good girl. Soft and sweet all for me," he praises as he continues fucking up into you. His heavy balls lightly slap against your ass with each thrust.
Your nails dig into his shoulder as the repetitive strokes start to build on one another. Small, whimpered expletives drip from your lips like a leaky faucet. He knows you're getting there. All he has to do is ramp up his efforts a little.
His hands lock around your waist like they do on hazy mornings. Just like then, he's obsessed with the way your skin dimples beneath his digits now. He boosts you back and starts bouncing you up and down in addition to his thrusts.
Your eyes roll back at the sensation and you take your bottom lip between your teeth. You don't have to do anything in this position still. He's strong enough to hold you upright all by himself. The only thing you had to do was like he said - stay still and let yourself be used.
"Can never get enough of you, baby, fuck," he grunts. His head falls back against the sagging cushion as he keeps working himself into you over and over. He glances back up at you slightly. "Is it feeling good?"
"Mhm," you whine, "So fuckin' good. So deep. All the way inside."
Your head bobbles around with the way he jerks you up and down on his lap. He smirks at your words and the airy way you say them.
"I know. I can see it," he responds, eyes flitting down to that faint and familiar bump. Evidence of his place inside you.
You only whimper in response. He drops you back down against his chest so one of his hands can slot against your center and rub your clit in fast, tight circles. The flickering feeling draws even more noises of pleasure from you.
The edge sneaks up on the both of you fast. You fall over it first. Your body spasms and seizes between his hands, but his strong grip is enough to keep you in place. For him, it explodes in a muted burst of ecstasy before burning into a brighter one. He wraps his arms around your smaller frame and keeps you flush against his sweaty skin as he fucks his load deep inside.
The both of you stay there while you come down. His chest puffs up and down with deep breaths. Even with all his exertion, his hand rubs soothing stripes along the column of your spine. You lie against him completely motionless, limp against the muscles of his chest. A little pleasure doll all for him to play with.
4K notes · View notes
izzy-b-hands · 7 months ago
Text
My doctor messaging me at 12:30 in the morning to tell me she wants to do a telehealth visit abt the side effects I'm having with my new Lamotrigine dose (including worse insomnia than my usual insomnia, as u may have guessed lmao) is. something.
#text post#like i know why i am awake babe why are YOU awake this late#and god why do we have to do another visit#they aren't bad enough to make me stop this dose and i haven't been on the new dose long enough to let it even out#can i not just Not have to do another uncomfortable visit where even if things turn out okay after#i later feel like I'm still not being wholly trusted/treated like i know my body and how i feel#i had worse side effects restarting this med months ago and we didn't have any additional visits for that#they fucking forgot to even book me for a f/u and i had to call in and beg for one basically#and then they misbooked it for the wrong reason and with the wrong doctor#and made it out like it was my fault when i made clear i begged and told the receptionist i spoke to to book said appt#that it needed to b with my doc for the Lamotrigine and that i hadn't been told when to follow up so i was just. doing it#bc she said i needed to but then didn't say when to book it#they're trying hard and im trying to give them grace but then this shit happens and like#im tired. makes me want to go into my new doc like nah never mind im fine. don't ask me nothing and i won't bug you with anything#unless im dying or nearly dead already.#would suck beyond believe attempting to raw dog life mostly again but goddamn. im so sick of this lack of stability with my care#anyway. probably an appt next Tuesday which is great#that's the week of the weekend that i work again and the week before my bday#(a bday I'll be working now which I'm not normally irked abt but. i am a bit rn)#so cool. yeah. let's stack anxiety and fear over a medical appt on top of everything else for that week#and that's not counting that this weekend I've been tasked with buying and getting signed a v expensive and rare figure#for my mum's bf and I'm kind of terrified im gonna fuck it up#he paid for tickets to the con the figure will be sold at and that the person he wants to sign it will be at#so if i fuck this up he'll want (understandably) to be paid back asap for that#and that's money i don't fucking have rn#i really wish she had waited till the actual day proper to contact me bc i couldn't sleep before this#and now i definitely cant bc like#it's dumb. but what if she takes my med away. it isn't perfect but it works better than any other med I've tried#what if she wants me to try a new one. i cant do that and b dealing with major side effects during the intense work schedule#that'll be happening for me v soon and then into November
1 note · View note
qqueenofhades · 1 year ago
Note
https://www.tumblr.com/qqueenofhades/743255237060689920/the-thing-that-confuses-me-about-the-dont-vote
The “don’t vote” left’s point is basically that, if Biden gets a second term, it’ll basically signal that “They’ll vote for us as long as we’re not Republicans, why don’t we do some REAL fucked up shit, if we can get away with it?” It takes the power out of the people’s hands and places it firmly in the party’s.
I can’t completely disagree with that, my caveat is that there’s no real alternative system or party in place, because top-down change is ineffective; a third party president has to contend with a two party congress.
Except no. This whole "Biden just wants to do as much fucked up shit as possible while not being a Republican, and if you give him a second term he'll do more fucked up shit deliberately to spite you" mindset is only possible as an interpretation if you a) deliberately and comprehensively ignore everything he has done to date, and b) you approach the situation with the maximum bad faith possible. Not to mention, the ultimate outcome of this Big Important Teaching Biden A Lesson is that Trump gets back into power and makes everything orders of magnitude worse, because he does in fact want to deliberately do evil shit to everyone and says so at every opportunity. There is not some magical happy alternative that springs into existence by not voting. If you choose this as a year to Teach Biden A Lesson, you are enabling Trump. Trump will be much, much worse. If you don't care about that, I still do not care what your Great Ideology is. You are not helping anyone and you are directly and irreversibly hurting everyone.
I made a post a few days ago wherein I mentioned that I want to assess Biden fairly, taking into account both strengths and weaknesses, but the rampant bad-faith, lying, misreading, misrepresentation, and open sabotage of him (especially by the online left; the GOP sometimes only wishes they were as good at turning Biden's voter pool against him) makes it really difficult to do that. My frustration with those people makes me just want to go "BIDEN IS GREAT THE END." I know he is a flawed old man (though by literally every account of a career spent in public service, he really does care about making the world a better place and any remotely good faith reading of his accomplishments thus far can see that). It is also very likely that he goes MORE left in a second term because he won't have to face the electorate again, he has always gone more left when pushed before, and he's not actually the scheming genocidal mastermind that leftist social media paints him as. Shocking, I know.
I know there are things in the world we don't like and don't want and want to stop, and therefore we blame our own president for not making it stop. But I have zero, no, none, absolutely none whatsoever sympathy for this pseudo-populist "WE NEED TO TEACH BIDEN A LESSON BY ELECTING TRUMP AGAIN, I AM VERY MORAL MUCH ACTIVIST" mindset. There's this funny thing about America wherein it is still (for now) a democracy. If Biden wins a second term, he can't run again. I would take literally anything these people said more seriously if they focused on developing their dream progressive successor for 2028 (and also figured out how to get that person elected and in a place to make real change) rather than cynically sabotaging Biden in the most consequential election year, again, of our lifetimes. If you don't like him now, find a way to make his successor a better option. Throwing a toddler tantrum and handing the country back to a senile, deranged, fascist, revenge-riddled, theocratic Trump HELPS. NOBODY. I still don't know how many times I'm going to have to say that, but yeah.
9K notes · View notes
searchingwardrobes · 2 months ago
Text
I have been debating sharing this for some time, but with the new year weight loss ads amping up, I feel it's something I have to say. I'm worried for people's health.
Unless you've been living under a rock, you probably already know about people taking the diabetic drug ozempic for weight loss. You've probably heard the debates about the ethics of taking needed drugs away from diabetes patients and maybe even the side effect of "ozempic face." However, there is one side effect of taking these drugs that, in my opinion, people are not being warned about.
If you carefully pay attention to the television ads, you will hear them mention "pancreatitis" as a possible side effect. If you're like me a decade ago, that word probably means nothing to you. Let me warn you, however, it is no minor thing. My husband suffered from chronic pancreatitis for five agonizing years. The pain is beyond comprehension. Doctors who specialize in the pancreas describe it as the worst pain a human can endure. There is no actual cure. Little is understood about the disease, so treatment is difficult. Doctors who understand it are few and far between. It took my husband forever to get diagnosed. He went through multiple surgeries and procedures, but nothing worked. He had to go on an extremely limiting diet. If he varied from it in any way, he would have an attack. The only way to recover from an attack was to not eat at all for days, then slowly add in broth and jello. Did he lose weight? Yes. As a matter of fact, one day he stepped out of the shower, and I burst into tears at the sight of him. He was skin and bones - I could count every rib. Was it worth it to be thin? If you even ask that question, I'm concerned for your mental health.
They couldn't figure out exactly why my husband got pancreatitis. At that time, they thought only alcoholics and drug addicts got pancreatitis. This made it difficult to get compassionate medical care, unfortunately. Now they know that prescription medication (particularly diabetic medication) and high cholesterol can also cause it. Then there is another group - where they just don't know. But you better believe I would hesitate to take any medication that could cause pancreatitis. I would weigh my options carefully to assess if it was worth the risk. In my opinion, weight loss is not worth that risk.
My concern has been heightened seeing the Hers commercials for these drugs (under different names, but rest assured, it is the same thing). These commercials brag that you can get these drugs from Hers with just a simple virtual call, no questions asked. I wonder if people are fully aware of the risks of these drugs. I also wonder if we even know all of the risks yet. I also fear that the culture around these drugs could develop into an us vs. them mentality. That if it's so easy to be thin, why wouldn't you be? And some are getting dangerously thin on these drugs.
I know some diabetics who are on these drugs, and necessarily so. They tell me that it causes nausea when they eat. That's why they don't eat much. Again, that doesn't sound like a pleasant way to live. If you need it to regulate your blood sugar, that's one thing. But if you don't? Why would you do this to yourself?
My husband is now healed of pancreatitis. It was a miracle. You may not believe in that sort of thing, but I'm telling you, there is no other explanation. We had exhausted every medical solution, then the pandemic hit. We were concerned because hospitals were only taking life or death cases. What if he had a bad attack and needed an iv of pain meds? What would we do? Weeks passed - no pain. A month passed - no pain. Six weeks passed - no pain. He decided to grill a steak - something he hadn't been able to even take a nibble of in 5 years. I watched him take a bite, holding my breath. Nothing. He ate the whole thing. No pain. Five years later, still no pain. The doctors can't explain it, either.
So our story has a happy ending. Not everyone else's does. I hope people take the time to read this. If you do, please, please share it. I don't want anyone suffering needlessly.
2K notes · View notes