#god i have so many thoughts about HER
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its a rain world au if you squint
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Tara headcanons :3
(it's literally just angst. Blame @lionydoorin for making me have Tara thoughts)
She can't stand the smell of cooking meat anymore. It reminds her of Amber.
After Sam left, there wasn't anyone buying groceries on a regular basis. She never starved, but there were many occasions where she went to bed hungry.
She doesn’t remember most of the night her dad left (or even the man himself for that matter). She tried to grab him as he was leaving, but he shoved her off. She slammed her head on the corner of the wall really hard, and ended up with a scar on her forehead, chronic psychosomatic migraines, and tinnitus.
She'll avoid going to the hospital unless she absolutely has to. Not only does it reminds her of being attacked, she was also a really sick kid, and she spent a lot of her childhood hospitalized. Even just going to the doctor stresses her out.
She's like. 70% stress and anxiety at any given moment. Seriously somebody get this girl some SSRIs before she has a heart attack.
Her leg and hand have permanent nerve damage, and her entire left arm is kind of fucked up after 6. She has a semi-permanent arm brace, a cane for her leg, and a whole lot of chronic pain.
Christina had a revolving door of boyfriends, and would bring them home sometimes. They were almost always awful to Tara.
She really misses Amber sometimes. She never tells anyone.
#god I have SO many thoughts about her#canon isn't angsty enough I must make her suffer more#*puts her in the blender*#the other 30% is rage btw#---#pretty much the only thing her leg is good for is telling when it's about to rain#like. it works. she can walk on it. but it can't support her weight and she walks with a limp#so she has a cane. no matter how much she hates it#she just wants to be /normal/. normal people don't have nerve damage from their girlfriend stomping on their leg#so she just pretends it didn't happen. and there's nothing wrong with her leg#--#Christina's guys were awful to Sam too (when she was around) but this is Tara headcanons so#-#she feels so incredibly guilty for missing Amber#she misses the person who tried to kill her. who tried to kill her sister. who /did/ kill her friends. how awful is that?#so she never tells anyone#the guilt almost eats her alive#Tara tag#horror tag#hc tag
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find another role, carry on the show
#EDIT IT DIDNT SAVE MY TAGS. hey so this post got a thousand notes huh. interesting. surely nothing will change#i'll leave all the old tags. for my thought process. and its kinda funny#take a bow stupid idiot (throws a tomato at them)#in stars and time#isat#siffrin#siffrin no middle names no last name ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧#... or is it. Smiles#i'd like to draw mira for her birthday but um (hasnt open artfight website in a few days) im scared.#also i have NICE ASKS TO ANSWER.... But im scared. give me a minute#Uawaaaaagh i drew this bc i was trying to animate a little bit but it just . Didnt look good. im not good ag 2d animation#tch. ill keep trying cause there ar e way too many songs that and now about isat because i have brain worms. i need amvs.#IM SCARED TO POST THINGS THAT ARE SPOILERY BECAUSE I WANT MY FRIENDS TO PLAY ISAT. BUT.#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sasasap#sasasa:p#WHAT IS THE PROLOGUES TAG.#tshirt that says 'i <3 killing the image in the mirror and taking its place' on the fromt#and a list of megan thee stallions tour dates on the back. お金稼ぐ俺らはスター#Im kind of tempted to edit this to be the versiom with the eyes. or maybe twt can have that. or. well#all of my friends are on twt (trombone slide sfx) so maybe thats where i should worry about spoilers.#ill see if i want to slap an eyepatch on them in the morning#Im one of those people who was like idgaf about twohats (lets it simmer for a week) Oh my god. Oh my god. Ohmy god#EDIT. i swapped it out for the Eyes version it should be fine as long as its tagged formspoilers right...#ill post eyepatch vers on twt partly bc spoilers but also ppl over there can be .. annoying ..... ....#i fear i would get 800 You Forgot The Eyepatch replies. PLEASE JUST SEE MY VISION.#[BANGING MY HANDS ON THE GLASS] HIS HAND. LIKE IN THE PROLOGUE. WHEN THEYE. HANDS. HELD[EXPLOSION
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thinking about. the sovereign of elegance battle.
how initially nikki seems pretty caught off guard by being puppeted around, and almost like she's in a trance? she definitely doesn't feel fully there, her movements are a lot more limp and being VERY distinctly controlled. she feels more distant, more hazy.
but then there's the point about halfway into the battle where the banshee has her hand over nikki's face, like she's still trying to control her, and nikki looks away. meets the banshee's eyes instead.
and the banshee's own expression shifts, there, too. nikki looks almost defiant, and the banshee isn't quite taken aback or surprised by that, but she doesnt seem to have anticipated it? it seems like she's curious, intrigued. seeing nikki look at her so fearlessly, even after being puppeted by her. almost like a challenge of her own.
and after that, nikki's movements shift. they feel more fluid, graceful, more like nikki is the one in control. matching the banshee's motions and her energy, no longer enthralled but choosing herself to continue the dance. they circle each other and nikki is smiling, like she's genuinely enjoying herself.
if you fail the battle, the banshee and nikki reach out to each other, but the banshee pushes forward as nikki pulls her own hand away, looking more hesitant, almost afraid again. and if you perfect it, nikki pulls away, but not out of fear. she spins again, smiling, taking a bow. enjoying herself, still. regarding the banshee as an equal, even though the banshee had been trying to subdue her.
after that perfect score, nikki, recognizing the melody. upset that the banshee is leaving. wanting to at least know her name. reaching out to her even as she disappears.
#infinity nikki#infinity nikki spoilers#in spoilers#sovereign of elegance#sovereign of elegant#the banshee#the song that plays when the banshee is leaving reminds me a bit of the wishing one's music box#but im nowhere NEAR familiar enough with like. music and identifying melodies and notes to actually tell LMAO#it doesnt really sound the same? i think im just. influenced bc of the little theories of like.#the banshee being glorier/the previous sovereign who vanished#and the other theories of glorier being nonoy's mother and then the music box that was left with her etc#i never maintag ever it Terrifies me. but. god i have so many fucking thoughts about this part#and i need to know if anyone else Also has any thoughts or if im just insane#alyalyoxenfree#infinity.aly
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doodling mochi outfit concepts again
#the cat witchs guild#the misc adventures of mochi and lime#tcwg#tmaomal#art#mochi#ocs#original#beta#outfits#cat bow....but better#actually positioned in way that makes it look like a cat bow#smad genshin thought of the cat bow too but they did it better by putting it in the back#anyway. i wanted to try doing that for mochi#part of me wants her to have a more stylized hat because so many witches in my head have cool unique hats#and hers is basic in most art i draw..#im returning again to (what would i do for her if she was not the mc)#oh yeah and thinking about putting a ``tail`` on her skirt#god she looks so cat-like now heuehueueeu#does that tail get in the way during fights??? nah it just whips around looking cool#i want so bad for mochi to grow into her own witch and find her style#im always so wishy washy bc her spiky hat is so og but a more stylized hat is what she would have...if she were not my mc
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mira !!! :]
#isat#in stars and time#isat mirabelle#isat spoilers#<- due to act 3 optional content !#the img might be being chewed due to weird canvas size oops ah well#one of these miras is not like the other#one of these miras doesnt belong ASFASFSDAFA#a majority of these are based on things mentioned / that happen in the house cuz i thought itd be fun to draw :D#so like the wilting plant is from gardening room dialogue#the poster with ppl holding hands and sparkly eyes is (i think??) from some SAPSAPSAAP dialogue in one of the first rooms#i tried looking around ISAT to see if it's also in there too but couldnt find it so uh correct me if im wrong if thats NOT an exclusive LOL#side note the 2 in the poster are some old nuz ocs isatified ASDFASFA#funnily enough tho they are from 2 different games if they actually ever met they would hate each others guts i think. hmm...#however both are also the most qualified to help with promotional stuff so theres that ASDFAFA#mira looking at her bonding proposals is sorta on the tin but#the fact that she has like right next to her while she sleeps in her dresser makes me :(#cuz to me it potrays how much theyve been weighing over her cuz of how close shes been keeping them with her vs putting them on a bookshelf#or something idk if that makes sense i dont have proper words atm#but uhhh moving on chalkboard is from one of the optional events#which i think is! important!!! i dont think ive seen many ppl talk about it but!! yeah!#however i too do not have words on it atm but!!! yeah!!!! moving on for now!#the 'mira' that is really just the change god is ofc from the change god event :]#aaand ofc the iconic finish from mira towards the king#and then some misc miras with swords for funsies tbh ASFAFA#but yeah! i like mira a lot actually but as with many things i do not currently have many words to properly articulate *why*#all i know in my heart of hearts is that she is near and dear and special to me personally#one day. one day i will be able to gather my thoughts in a cohesive manner but that day. is not today!#anyway tag talk over :]
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Okay yes odysseus becomes the monster and when he gets home he is physically/changed/ he's different not quiet human anymore HOWEVER as the years go by slowly odysseus changes back slowly becomes human once more under the love of his wife of being /safe/
#epic the musical#Odysseus#Penelope#Odypen#Guys I have so many thoughts about the heros journey and how yah you're different but the home loves you back#Odysseus canonically being different at the end#The red eyes the slight shadow powers the way he's taken and absorbed something from every god and monsters#And not to mention calypso doing her damnded to make him immortal#But to make it permanent you've always needed the person's consent and odysseus has always wanted to be just a man#(And his story has always been a deeply mortal story. Diomede's story is the one of immortality)#And I love love love the idea of a person being physically changed becoming something other than human#But I think there has to be the other side of that of a slow transformation back into human as the character slowly heals and learns#How to be home once again
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Can you talk about trans!Curly a little bit more? I'm curios if you have any headcanons and the like
-💀
It's just such a thing in my mind because it adds a truthful sadness and differing aspect to mouthwashing.
If Curly was trans it adds the horror of the horribly selfish thought he could have easily been in Anya's situation. It could've been him but it wasn't and he so conflicted on the pit it put in his stomach that brings and the shameful relief it wasn't. In this scenario he is friends with Jimmy for a long time still. Jimmy likely knew him pretransition. Maybe he gave Curly weird looks then, maybe they never stopped after, maybe they seemed meaner. They are guys now, bros, both of them are. He doesn't really have to worry what those looks mean anymore, Jimmy just has that face with him sometimes. It's recontextualizing a lot of things for him that he was in denial about or too ashamed to admit. How naive he was being and how he let that get another person hurt.
Specifically with Anya, it's he knows the dread and fear she's feeling. He can understand it because he had to live with it for a good portion of his life, he knows it cause he still does, just in a slightly different way. It makes him think of all the times he's been alone with Jimmy, all the times he's been way more drunk off his ass and not remember the night, Jimmy was always with him the next day. Makes him think of the comments he would laugh off both because that's what guys do but because that part of being a girl says to laugh so Jimmy doesn't do something. It's the selfish realization that he was never safe and he's uncertain now too. Mad at himself for forgeting that feeling, espcially since for a long time he would've been considered the only woman on a crew (with all that implies) for a long time.
He should've taken those blinders off, step back into that position for just a moment and it's so much more painful that Anya likely came to him because he should've gotten it. Those thoughts don't leave his mind after the crash when he's in an even more vulnerable position than she was...
#this is less headcanons and more my thoughts of the intersectional horror this brings to mouthwashing which is also a thing it#already has but more directly in the mix vs just the class gender and positional struggle. like the idea he waited to confront Jimmy becaus#he could conceptualize the crime better because of experience with womanhood and also how it would've destroyed him in terms of being trans#like its weird to word as a comparison but thats kinda how empathy works as in an understanding and ability to project through aspects#like you found out your friend who has always had weird feelings about and relating to you is a rapist and got one of your other friend#pregnant and is now being openly hostile and aggressive towards you. You have only a few days to really think on all of this all the years#with him and how many oppurtunites he had that you blame yourself for giving him both in life and to do to you. You are starting to#realize that he may have done what he did to Anya because it was no longer viable with him or because of weird transphobia/homophobia#from Jimmy and god its so much and he should've know better and what did Jimmy do then - c r a s h#he is at such a small amount of mercy to Jimmy now and he can't protect Anya and it's terrifying because i know and you know that Jimmy is#giving him those weird looks again...#like it adds another layer of horror to things and while I don't think Jimmy would do anything to Curly it's heavily implied he targeted he#because of relatively more important position and getting Curly to have doubts about him as a power play and Curly knows Jimmy well enough#that him immediately exerting his authority and power would set him off after already having been mad about it and even when doing#damage control it still set him off. like its the horror of accidenlty siding with your oppresser and hurting other like you only to then b#stabbed in the back again by the person who took advantage of your nature like its so complext but my actual trans curly headcanons#are just a little bit happier like i imagine he was the first on the boys soccer team and a star player. maybe he and jimmy even picked ou#his first offical “boy” clothes and Jimmy picked most so he looked like the grungiest white boy but she was a boy so it didn't matter cause#it was with his friend who accepted him and I bet on the bed he looks back at all those moments and notices the little details that his#friend wasnt actually so happy but he can't be certain when he started looking so bitter or hes just imagining out of paranoia cause he jus#cant know and even if he could he wouldn't want to ask like god thinking about Anya and probably being a little glad if not heartbroken#that she did get out of it in the end like trans curly and anya destroy me even more its so upsetting like he didn't realize how much he go#you girl and waited to act like it was cowardice but then would she not realize what hes realizing? should that be a grace or more of a#condemnation in her mind like what are her thoughts? espically during the scene Jimmy hits Curly like she had to hear and what did she thin#they are tormented in a similar hells with the same demon and its fascinating#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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I feel practically exploitative re: you posting all this Morty art; do you have a tip jar or anything?? Like the girlies are DEVOURING IT, I just feel rude continuously asking for more
(hey I remembered csp has proper comic options! my shit will now be Legible. yippee, etc.)
ahhh ya'll r too kind...I do have an ancient kofi somewhere but do NOT feel pressured to do anything with that, these r just fun doodles, for Fun. Trust me when I say if I did not want to do something it would Not Get Done. If I ever got a request I didn't like I would simply say 'not for me, sorry!' and there would be no hard feelings.
BUT. since you asked. top non-monetary forms of compensation are:
a) reblogs with tags/comments (I do little happy dance every time notification number goes up, double that if there's incoherent screaming involved. ya'll are doing great on that front i'm having so much fun already :3c ) b) oc/personal canon interaction. I have 200+ named ocs, fandom and original. most of the fandom ones are involved in relatively extensive plots. ask me if they know canon characters. ask me stupid shit. ask me plot questions. ask them questions. whatever. you're here from 40k so juno and her gang would be the group of interest. I have 17k words worth of stuff for her already written, they're just not posted bc they're not chronological within the overarching plot. but just in case you needed proof for how insane i Can and Will be given the chance. c) if you want me to love u forever and ever, giving me any excuse to talk about Z will do that!!! He is a non-fandom oc but he is designed for crossover stuff so he's around. Right now he's. Uh. [checks notes] terrorizing nightlords. i think.
#i have many thoughts about many characters and they are all contained in my friend's discord#i can go a little nuts#and so far i have been keeping this space relatively quiet but. well.#[gestures to my lost primarch post] clearly the dam breaks on occasion#ANYWAY TY FOR UR CONTINUED SUPPORT#MORTY'S A LITTLE CONFUSED he's just not used to positive attention give him a minute#wh40k#fanart#mortarion#zeniel corbin#ocs#...do i even have an m tag#probably not#m. the witch#oh god don't click on her tag that is ANCIENT art jesus#inbox
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CHARLIE MAGNE from HAZBIN HOTEL (2019): Pilot - "That's Entertainment" ↳ "So, I've been thinking: Isn't there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through... redemption?"
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel edit#hazbin charlie#charlie magne#hazbin edit#requested#hazbin hotel pilot#that's entertainment#charlie#my gifs#god ain't she the cutest little thing!#not gonna lie i get a bit emotional seeing her do The Pose during ''wonderful fantastic new hotel''#it's the same pose she does in the S1 poster :')#okay actually im back here to say some things in the tags:#holy almighty LORD these gave me so much grief to color in a way i thought looked nice#specifically the one of her in the news chair. sorry i was NOT gonna let that hideous highlighter green color assault all your eyeballs.#did i lose nearly two hours of sleep getting it right because i still have no idea what i'm doing? yes. worth it? YES. ohh yes.#i liked the seafoam look so i made the cloud sequence match :] or at least tried to#there WAS supposed to be another one of her in the news room but i just hated how it kept turning out so i scrapped it.#coloring the main series was one thing to learn but the PILOT? never has it been so obvious to me just how much more bright and vibrant#the colors got during the progression of the world design. also. if by any chance one of those cool and experienced#gif makers happens to see these tags and wants a good laugh: i've been doing this for how many months now? and just last NIGHT figured out#how to use the fucking eraser in photoshop....... thing is... i also draw. i KNOW what program tools look like. i KNOW ppl draw in PS.#i'm just a really silly fuckin goose!! TEEHEE FUCKING HEE I GUESS!#so for months i've been like ''god i wish i could just erase this part from the layer'' and looking at the eraser tool and just being like#''nah it's probably different and weird i'll just stick to what i know'' -> said boo boo the FOOL#see i could be in the club but i'd rather be aggressively neurodivergent about the silly queer demon cartoon that altered my brain chemical
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sometimes the ghost of kelley puckett (he is still alive) haunts me. does he know. does he even know. he’s so detached from the comics community and he’s such a private guy (I RESPECT THAT WHOLEHEARTEDLY) that i really and truly do not know if this man knows how much cassandra cain means to us. does he know batgirl 2000 is heralded as the bible of dc solo books, as a lot of people’s favorite comic ever written. does he know how much we love cass. how we write essays over her character and how amazing she is and how she changed our lives. does he know how adored his writing is. does he know he wrote the best comics character introduction of all time. does he even. know.
#cassandra cain#dc#look. sometimes i think about kelley puckett. and i go a little crazy#i KNOW how much shit he got from dc execs at the time#because he was doing something new and different#and because dc as well as a lot of fans at the time#didn’t have room for a newly created disabled asian teenaged girl in their personal batman mythos.#i have a pretty good idea of how much disrespect cass got as a character (SEE: HER LITERALLY BEING WRITTEN OUT OF THE STORY WHEN#DUDES GOT SO WHINY ABOUT BABS NOT BEING BATGIRL. WTF.)#so. i have no idea what his general thoughts & feelings were when writing for dc.#i think he’s doing accountancy now? or coding? something like that#the man did like ONE interview and i think it was from 2002#ANYWAY. THE POINT IS.#the way this circle of online dc fans regard cass and batgirl 200 in general#is SO…#WE LOVE CASS OKAY. SHE’S SO MANY PEOPLES FAVORITE CHARACTER.#and batgirl 2000 is thought of as THEE comic book EVER#and as some of the best writing dc had EVER had#kelley puckett is a literal god of a writer to us.#AND I DONT KNOW IF HE?? KNOWS THAT?????#DOES HE KNOW I WOULD PAY HIM A MILLION DOLLARS TO COME WRITE FOR DC AGAIN.#because hes just that good and most comics post new 52 have been garbage#does he know how beloved he is. I don’t know#anyway. I sincerely hope wherever mr puckett is right now#he’s having a wonderful day and he knows how many gay people on tumblr#write extensive meta essays about his writing
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I hate when Chakotay is watered down to be Janeway's yes man because their disagreements are actually very interesting. [A lot of rambling analysis of this debate in particular below]
Chakotay in Parallax is very interesting in that he has to navigate a lot of different dynamics. Balance a lot of plates while being watched keenly by everyone around him. Immediately preceding this scene we see him ask B'Elanna for her opinion on the bridge - both as a chance to show her knowledge in his bid to make her chief engineer (because she wouldn't get a chance to otherwise as Janeway has clearly indicated that at this point she views B'Elanna as a troublemaker who won't be considered for the position) and because he just thinks she's a better engineer than Carey and wants the best possible chance of them succeeding. Janeway sees this as unacceptable. Carey is the chief engineer and so he should be called and Chakotay NOT asking for his opinion is an insult to Carey, Janeway, and might make the crew doubt Chakotay (and by extension the Maquis') loyalty to the Starfleet crew.
At this point it seems that to Janeway integration ["They're not your people"] means the path of least resistance, specifically tailored towards the Starfleet crew. She wants Chakotay by her side to keep the Maquis crew calm but also seems unwilling to consider them for important positions aboard the ship. Though she says that the Maquis are not Chakotay's people, not his crew, she certainly doesn't seem to consider them hers [Compare this to later instances where she stresses 'our' crew, here she simply says they aren't Chakotay's: Whose crew are they? Are they crew at all?]. This less leaves the impression of "We need to be a cohesive team" and more "You're not in charge here." She essentially accuses Chakotay of playing favorites. In her mind Chakotay's actions are not conducive to integrating the crews which would (again, in her mind) mean the Maquis being docile and accepting, obedient and content - not making trouble for the Starfleet crew. Chakotay counters Janeway's accusation with one of his own: That he IS trying to integrate them into the crew but her not allowing the Maquis any opportunity to prove themselves or succeed, not showing any trust in any of them (except, implicitly at this point, him) is making things difficult. At this point the Maquis crew are ready to mutiny on his word at any time. He knows this for a fact. Aside from that looming threat (the threat being that tensions are high and if nothing changes and they remain high there might be a mutiny even without his word) - Chakotay knows these people and trusts them. Though Starfleet and Janeway think of the Maquis as a violent bunch of criminal terrorists, Chakotay and a good number of the Maquis joined because they believed in the cause they were fighting for. These are people Chakotay knows WILL fight fiercely for what they believe in and conversely, AGAINST what they perceive as injustice. Even if they're not in the majority - they're used to picking fights which seem impossible to win. At this point Janeway admits that she ISN'T making it easy for Chakotay to integrate the Maquis - specifically talking about practical concerns; how she doesn't feel she can let Maquis crew have roles of importance on the ship because they lack the ability to hold them. "They don't have the discipline, they don't have the training," - asserting that they just aren't prepared for any such roles and it doesn't have to do with them being Maquis specifically. Ostensibly, she's treating them as she might treat anyone unqualified for the job.
Chakotay maintains that some of them, like B'Elanna, have the ability to be trained - challenging her point by saying that IF they're trained there's no reason for any Maquis member NOT to be given a more prominent role on the ship. He isn't suggesting they just unqualified people important jobs. If the problem is that they aren't trained, let's train them. These people have the ability to succeed if you give them the tools they need and a fair chance, he insists. Janeway then switches gears and her argument becomes not "The Maquis are untrained so they can't be given those jobs" but "The Maquis crew are unworthy of those jobs when compared to Starfleet personnel" saying that it'll cause insult and upset among the Starfleet crew if any member of the Maquis were to be promoted above them. Again, her idea of integration is based more on Maquis subservience to the Starfleet crew than it is the two crews working together. (Not that I believe she looks at it that way, it's just where her 'path of least resistance' leads) - though she accuses Chakotay of being too focused on "his" crew, she is admitting here that she believes her real crew are the Starfleet officers aboard, not the Maquis. She also admits here that the system she wishes to maintain (and is asking Chakotay to enforce) is one where there will ostensibly never be any chance of a Maquis crew member being promoted because no Maquis crew member will ever be more qualified, more worthy, than a member of Starfleet. We can see how it'd be difficult for Chakotay to convince his crew to remain calm under these circumstances. There's also Tuvok's behavior toward him at the beginning of the episode where the Vulcan nearly goes over Chakotay's head and when he doesn't do so (as Chakotay reminds him that HE'S the superior officer, the First Officer in fact,) Tuvok acts as if him backing down (partially) and conceding (partially) to Chakotay's authority is a favor to Chakotay.
Tuvok in this conversation is downright insubordinate to Chakotay. Despite Chakotay being the first officer, he doesn't take what he says seriously, argues that his own opinion on what should be done should be followed rather than Chakotay's, lectures the first officer about his conduct, and then almost seems to threaten him with a report. In Starfleet's rigidly hierarchical rules, acting like this to a superior officer (ESPECIALLY the first officer) wouldn't be tolerated and Tuvok knows this perfectly well. He isn't a rebellious character and clearly in other episodes adheres to these Starfleet hierarchies and codes of conduct very strictly. He values them highly. But Chakotay, a Maquis, shouldn't be First Officer. Why should he be given respect for a title he didn't earn? [Affirming Janeway's argument about how Starfleet officers won't be eager to follow a Maquis senior officer] Even though Chakotay tells Tuvok off for it ["I don't have to explain myself to you"] he doesn't threaten to put Tuvok on report or explicitly mention his insubordination. It's unclear if this is Chakotay's personality or if he just doesn't feel he CAN do that. Tuvok is one of the three most senior officers aboard and very close to Janeway. Chakotay has to think of the optics of any situation at all times - we see seconds after this conversation that rumors have already started swirling around B'Elanna being relegated to quarters that've fanned the flames of mutiny. Though we know Tuvok has personal reasons for behaving the way he does toward Chakotay (which he later admits), I really don't think it'd be out of the ordinary for this to be how most Starfleet personnel would treat the Maquis if they weren't outright hostile: Like they're only pretend crewmen. To a lesser extent we even see this with Janeway: In the following staff meeting, she clearly doesn't consider B'Elanna a viable option when Chakotay brings her up and almost ignores the suggestion entirely.
It also, again, leaves Chakotay in an impossible position. If he doesn't protect and fight for the Maquis crew, they won't ever be considered a true part of the crew and dissatisfaction will likely spread among them. Dissatisfaction which the Starfleet crew will then use to further label the Maquis as insubordinate, uncontrollable, unfit. Not to mention that if he doesn't advocate for them, he might lose their trust. However, if he DOES try to help the Maquis crew advance the Starfleet crew will view this as 'favoritism' and will further distrust him, won't respect the people he puts forth as worthy. Janeway seems to be intent on not advocating for any of the Maquis crew and also seems unwilling to ask that the Starfleet crew grant leniency. She implies that the Maquis crew need to learn to get in line and keep quiet and it seems almost like [we must remember the optics] she has Chakotay as the only Maquis in a position of power to facilitate that. Chakotay recognizes and pushes against that, saying that he won't just be her token Maquis - there only so she can point to him and say "See? We don't discriminate against the Maquis here." effectively a tool used to shut down any arguments of unfair treatment and a tool to quell the Maquis if any talk of mutiny DOES arise. In this model, Janeway can just tell Chakotay to calm them down and they'll listen because they trust him. She also doesn't have to really listen to anything he says: A token First Officer has no authority; his words don't hold weight. [Chakotay isn't Maquis anymore, they aren't his crew anymore - ok. What is he then? What are they? Nothing, without respect.] This plan seems untenable, as much as Janeway frames it as sensible: "I can't make it easy, Commander. Surely you can understand that," and alternatives as impossible "How am I supposed to ask them to accept a Maquis as their superior officer just because circumstances have forced us together?" - in the long run, how would this be sustainable? In any power structure, you cannot expect a group of people you're unwilling to grant trust or agency to obediently follow you forever. This proposed form of 'integration' in which the Maquis are kept on the bottom rung and told intermittently to stay there quietly by the only one of them granted permission to stand at the top would never be sustainable - especially with a group like the Maquis who again, were founded on the belief that its members should fight against inequity and are already on the verge of mutiny.
I specifically find the statement "How am I supposed to ask them to accept a Maquis as their superior officer just because circumstances have forced us together?" to be interesting because personally I'd say that being forced together for the rest of almost everyone's natural life is a pretty good reason to ask people to adapt and Janeway does understand this but only applies it to the Maquis - the Maquis are the ones who have to adapt, not Starfleet. The only thing the Starfleet crew have to do is tolerate their presence on board.
At this point Janeway again claims that if Chakotay can show her a 'qualified' Maquis candidate she'll consider them. I believe this is true but we already know that Janeway's standards for qualification will likely not fit the vast majority of the Maquis and Chakotay ignores the claim in favor of putting forth B'Elanna again, firmly. Janeway predictably dismisses her as unqualified and Chakotay disagrees, arguing that he knows her. He's worked with her. He KNOWS that B'Elanna can excel at the job even if she doesn't meet Starfleet/Janeway's qualifications. He doesn't value those qualifications over what he's observed about her - just as he didn't value Carey's title over what he knew about the gap between his and B'Elanna's abilities. Then, Chakotay switches gears. He admits that Janeway's right - he does view the Maquis as his crew but that's because Janeway (almost self admittingly) doesn't and if he doesn't, who will they have? [What kind of captain, kind of man, would he be?] "You're going to have to give them more authority if you want their loyalty." "Theirs or yours, Commander?" Janeway frames Chakotay's words pointing out the flaws in this plan which I outlined earlier, as almost a threat (if she doesn't have Chakotay's loyalty it'll most definitely mean mutiny). Chakotay asserts that it wasn't a threat, he's only trying to help by telling her how the Maquis crew will react to what she's telling him. "I'm sorry you can't see that" - not an apology for what he said but that she isn't willing to budge, not willing to listen to him and acknowledge that she might be as biased towards her crew as he is towards his. Chakotay is trying his best to acclimate his crew but if Janeway isn't willing to do the same, to talk to her people as he's talking to his, then this will not end well and that isn't a threat. It's just the reality of the situation. He then asks permission to leave, showing he is willing to observe Starfleet protocol (just as when he asked permission to speak freely), and Janeway lets him go, exhaling at the intensity of their debate when alone in her ready room.
#J/C is not interesting to me when they're strifelessly playing house or Chakotay is her lovesick yesman who'll do whatever she says#Kathryn Janeway#Chakotay#I really wish they'd kept up this kind of tension between the crews and used Tuvok/Janeway/Tuvok as like a microcosm of that tension#it'd be so good!!#Tuvok#<- he's there too#chara analysis#star trek voyager#st voy#Is this the only episode they call the ship 'The Voyager' ??#Also hearing Harry call Tom 'Mr Paris' is funny - early seasons voyager you have my heart early seasons voy supremacy#ANYWAY - that's beside the point#I do like how the maquis v starfleet tension is handled in this episode#I love how we see everyone start working together and relationships begin to form#How once B'Elanna shows her stuff Janeway is almost immediately intrigued and excited & how B'Elanna feeds off that excitement#The Doctor: -annoyed annoyed complaining complaining snarky comment- ugh I can't believe I have to help with something STUPID#Kes: You're very sensitive aren't you~? /gen /pos#The Doctor: ???? um ..... haha. idk. anyway I'm glad I could help :)#'how can we be seeing a reflection of something that we hadn't even done yet?' Voyager I love you MWAH#Tom Janeway B'Elanna: -temporal mechanics- / Harry: .... so how do we get out???#SUUCKS that in later seasons B'Elanna & Chakotay's relationship isn't focused on anymore but I mean. Every poc is pushed aside in later#seasons. But here you can see how much Chakotay believes in her and wants her to succeed!!! No wonder she likes him so much#He was probably one of the first people to really believe in her and SHOW IT and now Janeway's doing the same thing <3#My above post may paint Janeway somewhat negatively but it's only in the 'character flaws and being wrong about things means you have#a chance to grow' way - as soon as B'Elanna shows her potential Janeway wants to encourage it#God B'Elanna's so pretty#I forgot Seska was on the bridge!#'many of your teachers thought you had the potential to be an outstanding officer' SOMEONE SHOULD HAVETOLD HEEEER!!!!!!!!#WHY DID NO ONE TELL HEEER!!!!!
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I think there should be some magnificent writing done of the looming moral dilemma of Elspeth Rook Mercar, the Breaker of Bonds, the firm believer in heroic nonsense, falling for a Lucanis Dellamorte, whose calling is death, the First Talon of the Crows. Because no matter how big and soft his heart is, he’s still unavoidably will lead the organization who helped to save Thedas, yes, but also is intertwined with many of the horrors that the Shadow Dragons oppose. And yet, still she will always choose Treviso, instead of Minrathous.
#this is so random#I love Veilguard I do very very much#but gods I needed more#nuances? non erasure of ugly bits?#the post-game lives of these two plague me#because its unavoidable of Rook learning how some crows are recruited#how they are trained#how Lucanis was trained by Caterina#that at the center of the pain and gloom there is family and love#and yet despite her morals and principles she stays by his side#she becomes the wife of the fitst talon she is gifted that dammed opal ring with Caterina’s blessing#because even though Rook is not a crow and cannot and will not be a crow she is *loyal*#like a dog#because she understands the importance of family unlike one specific man#I have so many thoughts about it#my rook would be so conflicted she hates Caterina for the abuse yet pities the woman lost to grief and and doom of her children and grand#and who doomed what was left#it’s so fascinating#please oh please BioWare give me a post canon dlc#I need to have a convo with the grandma please#on the brighter side the sheet confusion and frustration of Illario to comedic degree#because after everything he does bit expect Caterina to welcome Rook to the family with open arms#I live by the misery of Dellamorte family and the sheer comedic potential of in-law Rook and Illario#dragon age rook#rook#lucanis x rook#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#veilguard spoilers
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things get better. my best friend in the world got top surgery after us talking about it for years. i'm getting mine next year. i have genuine friends now who teach me everyday what love looks like. love looks like going to an arcade and talking for hours at the bar instead. love looks like planning road trips to our hometowns. love looks like choosing our regalia colors together. love looks like learning our language. love looks like compression binders. love looks like top surgery scars. love looks like sweet grass tattoos.
things get better.
#i just remember being a kid and trying to picture my future and coming up blank#never thought I'd have friends who invitr me to shows and genuinely excited to introduce me#I've got this great friend i met at work and she's so fucking awesome!#the exact girl I'd see as a kid and was like god i wanna know her i wanna be her friend#and everytime we talk it's like light casting both ways#im so thankful for my family#im so thankful for my uncle who tells me so many funny stories#for all the endless conversations. for teaching me about our people. telling me about where we come from. feeding me spaghetti after sweat#holding my earrings at the powwow. im thankful for my cousins and their loud beautiful laughter#and for finally fucking accepting that my parents not wanting to be apart of my life doesn't mean I can't live it#wado to friends and family#and actually looking forward to the future now ❤️#vent
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really fucking sick and tired of people who really fucking love the eddie book jumping on people who don't like or are even remotely critical of it's posts and like crusading their opinions around from the top of their high horses and shoving it down our throats.
if you like the book, great! that's awesome! love that for you! i am genuinely glad that you were able to find good in it and enjoy it!!
but not everyone did, and not everyone is going to agree with you. so, instead of going on some grand crusade where you find every single post that includes anything even remotely negative or negative adjacent or even neutrally critical and spending ALL this time and effort trying to provide unwanted rebuttals to every single thing, maybe you should just stay in your lane and find people who DO like the book and chat about it with them.
because i can PROMISE YOU, none of us appreciate it when you come onto our posts and start accusing us of "hating on" the author or "being rude" about her and her work and RIDICULOUS shit like that.
being critical of something and pointing out it's flaws is NOT inherently hating on it. i, frankly, do not know where people got that notion, but it's not fucking true so can we fucking quit assuming it is? and, critiquing something is also NOT the same as saying this is shit and it sucks and the author is a piece of garbage. again, where the fuck that came from is beyond me. you can be critical of something and still enjoy it. as soooo many of you love to point out, it's not perfect, why should it be perfect? so D U H. of course that means criticism can and should arise???
also. hot take (by which i mean ice fucking cold because it's NOT a fucking hot take), but going around toting FALSE facts as part of your "defense" does not make you or your argument look good. you, like the author, should maybe do a basic fact check first. 🙃
tldr, if you like the book, that's genuinely great, but stay in your fucking lane and stop seeking out posts from people who didn't like it to start shit in the notes.
#flight of icarus#stranger things#this has happened to me and to so many of my friends and im fucking SICK of it#i didn't even hate the book either!! i thought it was just okay#and yet i STILL get all these book lovers jumping down my throat about things i say about the book#things that - HONESTLY are not even like that scathing!!!!!#like god damn all im asking for is a little BASIC effort from the author and they all think thats me asking for her head on a platter#its NOT#i have no problem with the author#she's whatever to me honestly just a vessel through which the book was given to us#ALSO she is some nebulous blob way outside my orbit. AS IN any critiques i have of her and her work are NOT direct assaults on her???#like i dont fucking KNOW her#im not saying any of this to her face#she is a published writer she should KNOW the risks she is taking when she publishes her writing#not everyone is going to like it! there are going to be people who are critical of it! there are going to be people who hate it!#critiques and pointing out mistakes and wishing for things to have been different is not a fucking direct attack#those things are actually pretty fucking common responses to ANYTHING#and a lot of times theyre actually meant as useful helpful things geared towards improvement and not something to tear someone down with#some people on the internet need to go touch grass and learn how to CRITICALLY THINK again#the world is not as black and white as you think#n e ways. rant over. if you stuck around through all of that kudos to you. i am just. at the end of my rope with this bullshit.
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I CANNOT GET OVER HOW COOL FLESHA'S MOVEMENT IS IN THE FINALIE!!
LIKE THE FIGHT??? THE FUCKING FIGHT??? IT'S SO ELEGENT YET JANKY AND SHE"S SO CHILL AND SMILELY IT"S SOOOO CREEEPPPYY!!!! SHE"S SO SURE SHE"S GONNA WIN I CAN"T!!
AND ITS SO ELEGENT!!!! LIKE SHE"S COMPLETLY HIJACKED THIS FLESH VESSEL AND KNOWS HOW TO USE IT!!! IT"S TOO SMOOTH AND ITS SUCH A GOOD CONTRAST TO UZI"S STRONG AND HARD HITTING MOVEMENTS!!!
LIKE UZI HAS NATRUAL JERK AND EVERYTHING SHE DOES IS EITHER A HIT OR RESTABLIZING HERSELF AFTER SHE HitS LIKE I CANT ARTICULATE IT BUT IT"S COOL AS FUCK!!!
WATCH THE FINALIE!! ITS SO MUCH BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE
#9/10 show#my only problem is that they did doll SO DIRTY#my girl deserves better#Genuinely though I came in with mid expectaions and was BLOWN OUT OF THE WATER#Like MD's writings good but it's not the best#I forgot that the goal of the show is TO HAVE A GOOD TIME!!!#I AM EATING THIS SHIT UP#literally this is the stuff I get hyped for#God I love it#THEY BROUGHT V BACK!!!#AND WE GOT J MOTIVES#literally my only problem is doll#she deserved more closer#like i wish the snapshot we got of the funeral was played somewhat seriously#someone needs to acknowledge how cool she was#if J is V if she didn't have friends and those parallels are explored in their fight#Then Uzi needs to acknowledge that doll is her without friends#but I guess they didn't have time#which is fair#I have so many thoughts about this show#but I'll save them for later#murder drones uzi#murder drones spoilers#murder drones#murder drones cyn#murder drones flesha#murder drones ep 8#murder drones episode 8
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