#god i LOVE writing for scott
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scott summers and jean grey but like this:
- jean grey immediately experiencing love at first sight for the scrawny teenage boy struggling to carry her suitcase up the stairs but being too hard headed to accept help
- (as they become friends when scott’s being annoying she absolutely trips him with her teke)
- scott summers after all the childhood trauma, thinks jean grey’s friendship is the best thing that has ever happened to him
- jean grey 10000% being the one to lean in and kiss him first, scott summers is wrecked !! this naturally leads to scott “my wife is so much cooler me” summers as adults
- despite scott’s mask of self assurance and natural leadership, he confides in jean that he’s afraid this cocky bravado —- is sometimes just a show
- scott summers takes pride in being jean grey’s partner it’s such a badge of honor to love her, understand her, belong in her head
#jott#jean grey x scott summers#jean grey x cyclops#jean grey#scott summers#i live in delusions where they never cheat on each other bc of weird writing#they go on double dates with logan & ororo and it’s like a platonic polycule i swear#scott summers is autistic#and jean grey lives in his head#and god she loved it there#their psychic connection is so strong#i promise their sex is so romantic and communicative i swear#if my gf gets a matching scott summers tattoo i swear ill insufferable about this forever#jean writes
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Anyone's sent today's Wolverine issue to Brevoort yet? You know since he keeps on yapping how the throuple is lacking evidence especially in recent issues LOL. This is exactly what the starving throuple fans deserved. It's not EVERYTHING of course, because this is still Marvel, but you can read it however you like and they didn't just retcon it from orbit as was at some point rumored. These panels make me mighty emotional, and now I'm ready to write ALL the throuple and scogan things for pride month :D.
#x men#across misc x verses#scott summers#scogean#scogan#this is what my hurting heart needed#after last week's bullshit#thanks to dear scottxlogan for the find#i wasn't a big fan of this wolverine run#because i don't see the need for all the gore in an all age medium#like god beware you show anything explicitely queer#because THINK OF THE CHILDREN#but who cares about children seeing all the gore amirite#anyway imma write now#wolverine#jean grey#countering all the poly hate i have to see in these tags lately#SO DOES LOVE INDEED#and this leaves the door open for a return someday#if that's what they're courageous enough at some point#and even if not#this is our we'll always have paris#cyclops#no i don't know how to tag in proper order thanks for asking
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i've been thinking about lesbian scott summers because the other day i made a jeanscott drawing where scott was a girl and like. how would it affect her, as a character, and how would it affect her relationship with other people (namely jean)?
scott's already canonically 'nervous' when it comes to his attraction to women. he's always like, "is this safe? it's not, it's not safe" until actively proven otherwise and EVEN THEN he's still like that (whyyy), and sure it might be because of his deadly eyes but add the lesbian into it. this shit takes place in the 60s, 70s, add the lesbian into it
#there is something about how society shapes people and how people shape society that is so hard to correctly show in media#in ways that aren't ooc. uncanny x-men begins in the 60s. bobby has been in the closet since the 60s#they already struggle because of how much the world hates mutants. add the fucking lesbian into it#there is something about the idea of xavier having repressed bobby's sexuality or smth like that because the ppl would hate them more#if they were queer. that i think would be fun to add into the jeanscott (+ xavier and perhaps bobby) dynamic#nothing can keep those two apart. so even if their sexuality was repressed. they still wouldn't be apart yk what i'm saying??#but.... society.......#smth about--#they can't help the fact that they're mutants so maybe queer people can't help the fact that they're queer#but it's the 60s#and they're lesbians#in the 60s#their love would still be the same i believe#but the way they might act upon it. the nature of their relationship. how much they show to the public. etc#all of that would change#the thing is. how it would change#the way society views people and the way people view society can affect how they show themselves to others#i'm not explaining myself correctly but please jst think about it#lesbian jeanscott... my beloved...#marvel comics#x-men comics#jeanscott#scott summers#jean grey#and GOD this isn't even talking about how the writers would. write them yk#like if scott was a girl we can know for a fact that they would not have been canon back then#so we can at least assume they wouldn't be together#until very recently#man this is so complicated#avis' post
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hey so. what if Gem calls Pearl a clingy/crazy ex. yknow. like Scott did
#now that it’s even more evident that this arc is heading into actual breakup vibes territory#and cmon. Pearl will definitely be going back to bother Gem again#vague gesture to ‘love you Gem even if you dont’ and Gem trying to be cold specifically to Pearl#god i hope i had this thought just because im overthinking and too hysteric. but. what if#someone tell me im insane and delusional or whatever. please#i dont want to actually write an entire Gem-Pearl-Scott parallel essay okay i will eat cement#mcyt
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This is probably not an original idea but I really like the concept that every winner of the life series becomes a god of life and is like a spectator of the following series. So Grian's third life self, Scott's last life self and Pearl's double life self are all watching their mortal selves play limited life, waiting for the fourth god to join them
Maybe Grian is the one who chose to replicate the original game and transfers their souls to the next game, which is why they have such vague memories of what happened the season before, but gives them a chance to save each other (giving lives) or betray each other (boogeyman). Then Scott joins him and chooses to make their mortals connected to one another so they never die alone to the hands of a god, but together. Then Pearl joins and wants to put an end to the games, so she sets a time limit. What will the next person do?
#I really like the idea that gods are controlling each of these games#it makes it feel more natural in a way?#also i love that each winner has some sort of emotional connection to how the next season is run#i just came up with all this today but idk i really like it#but i wouldn't be surprised if someone else has thought of something similar lmao#it happens#very tempted to write something about this#limited life#grian#scott smajor#pearlescentmoon#third life#last life#double life#trafficblr
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not to talk about ramona again but i find it so fucking important the dichotomy of how the exes view ramona vs. how scott does. it's mainly about how scott doesn't. blame her? for leaving? like. of course he wants her to stay because he loves her but like. the exes blame her.
yes, some of them are her fault. there's no denying that. but specifically gideon saying that it was her fault and scott rebuking him is. it's something that can be so personal. the twins call her a two-timing slut. roxie thinks that ramona can do better than scott. matthew was used, but also it was seventh grade! let it fucking go dude! no one cna say that they were a paragon of virtue in seventh grade
idk it just. it makes me weep that scott still treats her like a person even with her flaws. it's so important to me. it's so fucking important to me. i'm sorry you think your ex-girlfriend is a manic pixie dream girl why don't you get fucked.
#scott pilgrim vs the world#scott pilgrim#ramona flowers#gideon graves#the katayanagi twins#ken katayanagi#kyle katayanagi#matthew patel#i could write a thousand dissertations on this fucking series i swear to fucking god#i love it so much#they are so important to me#they will never STOP being important to me
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Ky Narec to Asajj Ventress - Dooku: Jedi Lost by Cavan Scott
#daily asajj thought of the day#YOU THINK I'D MISS MY OWN FUNERAL?#I WAS STANDING BESIDE YOU. I SAW YOU CRY.#was going through my pictures and oh god#this is my second quinlan was here you don't understand#this is like my favorite ky and asajj thing ever#i love everything about them but thissssss#cavan scott went god mode writing them#sw#star wars#asajj ventress#ventress#ky narec#dooku: jedi lost#dooku jedi lost#cavan scott
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High School! Leon S. Kennedy Headcanons
This is an accumulation of some headcanas of Leon Kennedy headcanons I've made over the past 6-ish months some are xreader some are what I personally think Highschool! Leon would do! (AN):This is my first time actually posting headcanons anywhere other than friends to read on discord so enjoy! ᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃
᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃
ೃ⁀➷Leon Kennedy in high school definitely played in some sort of sport my personal opinion is that he played 2 sports during different seasons he played baseball and volleyball (for some reason I cannot for the life of me see him playing football or basketball).
ೃ⁀➷We all know Leon is a through and through rock enjoyer but I feel like he also listens to country-rock and the occasional Taylor Swift song.
ೃ⁀➷Leon probably wore glasses in high school and especially during sports practice but during games he wore contacts and switch permanently to them when he got into the police academy.
ೃ⁀➷Late night date with High school Leon probably involves going to the nearby park at 11pm on a Friday night and climbing to the top of the play area and sitting on the monkey bars and star gazing will holding hands simply enjoying each other's presence
ೃ⁀➷I think Leon really excelled in his academics everything but history I ended up being his first period class every year and he couldn't bring himself to care enough especially when he was up super late after practice finishing up (He had barely started it) his homework
᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃ ⚘᠂ ⚘ ˚ ⚘ ᠂ ⚘ ᠃᠃
That's all I have for now, I don't wanna put all of them out at the same time and not have anymore content. Reblogs and likes a greatly appreciated! have a great Day, Night or Afternoon ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
#leon kennedy x reader#God help me i am so in love with this man its so bad at this point i think i might die#Leon Scott Kennedy#leon sexy kennedy#fluff#leon fluff#preRE2leon#leon kennedy headcanons#leon scott kennedy x reader#buzzy𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑writes
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Honestly kind of lame of CS Forester not to go in for the weird Narnia ending. Think of how fun that could have been
#don't read these tags if you don't want spoilers i'm going to put spoilers in the tags#but i just finished admiral and i think it would have been fun if they had all died actually. sorry that sounds horrible but genuinely#it would have been better than the actual ending#which was fine it was just stupidboring heroics and i did not come here for that#someone needs to write a fic in which they all perish in the hurricane and hornblower actually tells barbara that he doesn't love her#and maybe maaaaybe she's also honest with him but either way he realizes that this is not what he wants and not how he wants to go out#or it's a tragedy and he doesn't realize that and dies an empty shell of a guy! either way it's more compelling#cs forester setting up so many dynamics that he refuses to deliver on and i'm so glad i'm finished so now i can just go back and fix it#or read the parts i like and nothing else. god. he's not even that bad at setting up interesting stuff that's the crazy part#but man do those books drive me up a wall when it comes to reader satisfaction i am NOT having it#anyways i'll now cease being grumpy and go off and read ursula leguin or something yay#perce rambles#percy yells at cecil scott#<- thank GOODNESS i am free of him (guy who read these books willingly in his free time)
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as i'm working on my interview questions for my buddy cole documentary i just had to make a side-by-side "before and after" of these two interviews related to buddy cole's presence in the amazon revival because wow look at that contrast.
first interview was from while the troupe was still writing the amazon sketches and the second is from while they were filming. gee i wonder what could have changed things??? why did we go from scott saying he'd written eleven buddy cole monologues to refusing to talk about buddy cole when prompted? why was bruce's anecdote about scott's buddy one man show delivered as a reason to get excited in the first half but with literal tears in his eyes in the second half? why did scott go from a very vocal participant in the interview in the first half to "just here to look pretty" in the second half? (spoiler alert: it was amazon completely censoring buddy cole)
i rewatched these interviews so i could write specific questions about promoting the amazon show but after watching that last clip i literally just had to lay on the floor listening to motion sickness by phoebe bridgers like jfc scott deserved better
#luckily the happy ending to this is scott got to do a tour consisting of 100% the monologues amazon rejected and it went super well#and now he's actually moved on from the amazon material completely and is letting go of a lot of that anger#and writing a new buddy show that's much more lighthearted while still containing some really biting satire#and at one point when we were on tour together after his best show scott said all the amazon bullshit was worth it bc it brought us this#(both worth it for his own buddy show but also because it brought the two of us together to tell buddy's story)#but yeah i don't blame the second interviewer bc they couldn't have known how bad scott was doing at the time#but the way he literally doesn't let scott refuse the question reminds me so much of the asshole from my college#like oh my god let the man LIVE.#luckily i have so many questions that if scott says he doesn't want to answer i can just be like ''cool now here's another topic''#also iirc scott mentioned that before the second interview he actually talked to bruce about giving him a signal so that bruce would know i#a question was too much for scott at the time so that bruce could jump in and answer it#god i love how supportive they are of each other. even if they complain about each other a lot (which they do lmao)
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whats wrong w post new52 jason todd im not hip
everything reboot through task force z is written by scott lobdell who is a creep of a human being and can't write for shit. also, jason was really at the start of his redemption journey post-under the red hood, and the reboot cut off that emotional arc. jason and the outlaws had potential because i do think pairing him with roy harper (who has had similar themes throughout his arcs and is another black sheep of his superhero "family") was a really fantastic idea but unfortunately it was written by lobdell who doesn't plan story arcs, apparently doesn't do research on existing character lore, and cannot write realistic characters or dialogue to save his life.
i will point to the "Cheer" storyline in batman: urban legends 1-6 as an actually really good modern take on jason, but that's a short story in an anthology series. his more major appearances are dogshit. i haven't read task force z even though it's a new writer because i frankly do not care for the suicide squad as a concept and i don't like the team he's been paired with (bane??? come on). it feels like another way to lump him into a very un-nuanced antihero role without examining the things that make him a complex and interesting character. lobdell's run did a lot of damage to his character and continuity and putting him on task force z is not where that is going to get fixed.
honestly the only really good jason writing (aside from cheer) is by judd winick (under the red hood, etc), who was responsible for his resurrection and who took a subtler approach to dealing with the complexity and managed to craft a really layered, compelling, and most of all believable character. just compare jason's encounter with tim in teen titans 29 (total crap, bad writing, cartoonish villainy, zero nuance and poor characterization - not lobdell, but lobdell is not the only guilty jason writer) and his encounter with mia dearden in green arrow 69-72 (winick again. complex, interesting, actually in line with jason's characterization, subtle!!!!). again, lobdell isn't the only guilty party - grant morrison's jason immediately before the new 52 reboot is completely off the rails in terms of cartoonish villainy - but before new 52, jason's story was predominantly handled by winick and was restricted to appearances in other comic runs. he didn't star in his own run until red hood and the outlaws, which means it became the authority on his continuity and character post-reboot, which is unfortunate because all of it was written by lobdell. who didn't get fired for forever because he was in with the boys gang at dc. which is crap.
anyways. sorry to go off i just have a lot a lot a lot of feelings on this matter. tldr new-52-and-onwards jason sucks because scott lobdell is a shitty writer. holding jason in my hands and sobbing baby boy what did they do to you
#im not proofreading this#if any of my sentences got lost in the middle and turned into a different thought. ignore that you know what i meant#asks#transfemme-kermit-real#i am foaming at the mouth about superhero comics constantly they make me so mad. yes i love them#but. like. ok chuck dixon is a conservative fuckwad but at least he's a really solid writer#scott lobdell is a fucking creep and an asshole AND he cannot write. what the hell!!!!!!!!#there are so many good writers out there!!!! why does a dipshit like that get to stay onfor so long!!!!!!!#god at this point maybe i should make a tag for these dc rants#its so dangerous to ask me about anything related to batman/batfamily bc i am 100% ready to flip my shit at any given moment
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AO3 Wrapped: 17, 29!
😇😇 omgg hi hi thank you<3 17. Your favorite character to write this year?
Oh boy .. first thought was scott lang, so I'll just go with that. finally got around to posting his pov in the they're always like this 'verse and this year he's just been.. around a lot. in other fic and in my heart. lol wait wait no its luis isnt it
29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?
heh... i could spend all day trying to answer this, so lets just go with this from a fair day's work: Sam doesn’t get what he could want at this point, but Bucky drops his hand and looks impossibly serious when he asks, “do you need backup?” Sam opens his mouth to say no on reflex, but pauses to take an uncharacteristic moment to think instead.
from the wrapped list!
#i typed out 'scott' for the first one#walked away to finish making my coffee and in like that 4 minutes i was like#omg natasha my beloved omg clint oooohh my god baby face joaquin actually and STILL I THINK the correct answer is luis#i love a character who runs their fucking mouth (what a surprise)#but scott is like. a . puzzle i'm trying to figure out.#jo do be writing or whatever#ask games
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getting up to open black forrest cake. docx even though she gave me a nightmare last night ♡
#i love this book so much#BUT CHAPTER SEVENTEEN????#idk what the word count sits at for this chapter so far#but im about to develop an irrational fear of barns#barnes ans churches#from how VISCERAL that nightmare was#because oh my god#lmao i do it to myself#does that mean i write well enough to give myself nightmares??? scott cawthorne but user rownanisntwriting???#writeblr#reblog
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“Green Lantern! I-- I couldn’t have missed you!”
“What do you think?”
“I don’t see how--? I fired at point blank range! I must’ve hit you!”
“You’re missing now!”
Alan Scott in Green Lantern (1941) #37
(Robert Kanigher, Alex Toth)
#green lantern 1941#alan scott#green lantern#jsa#justice society of america#robert kanigher#alex toth#dc#dc comics#dcedit#comicedit#comicsedit#u can reblog#WHAT AN ABSOLUTELY DELICIOUS STORY KANIGHER'S WRITING ALEX'S ART THERES JUST NOTHING. I MEAN ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. LIKE GOING BACK TO GL AFTER#A LONG TIME AWAY FROM THE BEST STUFF THE MEDIUM EVER PRODUCED#id completely forgotten about this story and it honest to god blew me away i mean whew!! talk about a tour de force!!!!#i loved that little exchange in the caption too alans like nobody else baby#i swear no character has ever gotten stories this good or characterisation this compelling#ALSO THE FIRST & ONLY TIME HE EVER GOT SHOT#jesus i cannot get over alex's sense of motion
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lmao after watching the last stand yeah i see why they took the timeline out back and shot it
#like. why did you have to do that to scott#anyways that kid with the erasure powers. he makes dodgeball fair at the mansion.#oops we've killed and depowered our characters! fuck!#tho i do like storm being the one in charge at the end? good for her#okay when magneto picked up the golden gate bridge#i genuinely went. there were easier ways to do this without doing that. giving people easy access to come up from behind???#most anti climatic death of a mentor EVER#get optimus primed charles#granted i know abt the short at the end of the movie but whatever#jean was not treated well in these movies imo#like. at all.#the love triangle stuff?#dear god logan you just met her stop it#scott didn't do much in these movies tbh but i did enjoy seeing him on screen. so him being killed off screen was just. really guys?#i dont know enough about the comics to say anything about phoenix or whatever. but that was dumb#dark and evil and seductive alter ego#dear fucking god what the fuck. thanks wiki#dont get me wrong i am enjoying the xmen movies.#there were just bad writing choices. and there is probably a reason why i only ever remembered watching days of future past
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Hey! Your writing is amazing! I’ve been checking daily for new fics lmao
I was wondering if your requests were open would you be able to write some angst with a happy ending w/ Peanut?
Perhaps a Shy!Reader who has flirty banter with Logan. They’re on a mission and Logan has to make a quick decision on who to save — Reader or Jean and he saves Jean without thinking. Reader ends up surviving with a few injuries but her and Logan’s relationship starts to deteriorate. Logan’s not good with verbal apologies so he does acts of service — bringing reader food/drinks etc. reader is stubborn and Logan starts to get frustrated. He eventually proves himself to reader.
I’m sorry if this is confusing!! I’m not creative enough to write it myself and you’re really really skilled. Love your work x
a/n: I read this request and then read them together and my brain imploded because I loved it so much, no smut in this one Summary: Logan saves Jean on a mission and it's the wake-up call you desperately needed to understand that you will never be her. You can't stand to look at him anymore and he doesn't understand why you've stopped talking to him.
“What’re you thinking of doing after this?”
You shrug, leaning back on the uncomfortable bench seats and looking over at Logan. “Not sure, got any plans?”
Logan smirks and you immediately know whatever he’s about to say is going to send you spiraling. “Yeah, whatever you’re doing, sweetheart.”
Oh. My. God!
You know you’ve got it bad when something as simple as that has you swooning. It’s so easy to fall into this routine with him, to pretend you’re more suave than you actually are. Despite your usual tendency to fade into the background, you find it nearly impossible to do with him.
Where someone else might let you stay quiet and go ignored, he seeks you out. He makes you feel seen and heard. Some days you don’t know if you appreciate it or despise it. You laugh a little, trying to hide just how affected by him you are. “Sounds good, Lo.”
He smiles and leans back on the seat, his arm coming around the back to rest lightly over your shoulders. You can tell from the look on Storm’s face that she’s trying not to laugh at you. You can’t blame her, you’re sure your eyes have tripled in size and you look absolutely stunned.
Flirting isn’t out of the usual for you and him. Lately, though, he’s upped the game. Touching you more than usual, spending more one-on-one time together. You can feel it all building up to something. You’re shy, not stupid, you know when a guy’s going to ask you out.
But it feels like he’s dragging it out longer than necessary like he’s enjoying teasing you a little too much. “Alright,” Scott stands up and moves towards the back of the jet. “We’re almost there, get ready.”
You, very reluctantly, pull away from Logan and get to your feet. He walks past you, briefly squeezing your hand before joining Scott by the ramp. You grin, flexing your hand by your side and trying to memorize the feeling.
The ramp lowers to the ground and Scott and Logan lead the way out. You’re expecting this to be simple. Stake out the area, find some information about the people running the warehouse, and figure out what exactly it is that they’ve been doing.
The air is bursting with moisture. It’s suffocating, how humid it is, how it makes the material of your suit cling to your skin. You know the rest of the team can feel it. That it’s irritating them just as much.
None of you want to be out here in the peak of summer, trying to be stealthy in these ridiculous costumes. Your thighs squeak every time they rub together. It’s beyond embarrassing. You know that that’s what has you all distracted.
You’re struggling through ankle-deep mud and sweating buckets. So none of you are paying any particular attention to the area around you. Technically, you shouldn’t have to, you’re still about a mile out from where you need to be.
You duck, hands coming up to cover your ears as Charles’ voice screams through your mind. It’s a trap!
Even with the warning, there’s no time to prepare. The ground around you explodes, grass and dirt flying through the air. Logan grabs your arm, he shoves himself in front of you and takes the brunt of the bullets. Splatters of blood hits your cheeks and he runs you both behind a tree for cover.
The other three have all found their own cover and they’re struggling to figure out where the shots are coming from. You spot something in the underbrush and scream, “Behind you!”
It’s more of a warning to duck than it is to move. You throw your hands up, shoving the man away from them and sending him flying into the trunk of a tree. You swear you can hear the snap of his spine as it hits the bark.
You look to Jean and nod towards the small clearing of trees. “Don’t,” Logan warns. But you’re already slipping out of his grip and solidifying the air in front of you. It provides enough of a cover, absorbing the bullets, and giving you all time to figure out a plan of attack.
Jean moves beside you, eyes narrowing on the perimeter of your cover. “There are too many of them, more than I can count.”
“How did they know we were coming?” Scott snaps, keeping an eye on the area behind you.
Your arms struggle under the weight of your power. The more bullets they shoot into your cover, the harder it is to keep up. You’re forced to absorb their energy, push it out tenfold to try and keep the blockage solidified.
“Guys,” you snap, “we need a plan. I can’t hold it much longer.” You grit your teeth, taking a step forward to try and push against the strain. It does nothing but make your bones ache. Logan shoots you a concerned glance, coming up behind you like he wants to take the weight off your shoulders. But there’s nothing he can do.
There’s movement behind you, a boot snapping a twig in two. You can’t risk looking back but you can hear the worry in Jean’s voice. “Ten of them-”
You can tell by the sounds of their movement that the others don’t give her much of a chance to finish. Ororo, Scott, and Logan all shoot forward to deal with the threat. Ten isn’t much to worry about. But that doesn’t change the fact that the men in front of you haven’t let up and you’re about to weep from the weight of keeping the wall up.
Jean stays beside you, brows furrowed in concern. She places her hand on your shoulder and closes her eyes. A second later you feel something like a cool blanket laid over you. The tension in your arms and core eases just enough for you to stop clenching your jaw so hard. Some of the strain eases away and you know she’s sharing it with you.
But just as quickly as the relief was given, it’s yanked away. Jean jumps back with a gasp, “Flux, we need to move!”
“I can’t,” you shout, fighting to be heard over the sound of bloodshed and gunshots going off in front of and behind you. The others are steadily moving through the people surrounding you, but their numbers are still overwhelming. “It’ll all come crashing down,” you tell her.
She glances towards the bullets, finally spotting the way they’re slowly, but steadily, moving through the thickened air. The second you let go you’ll be riddled with holes. “Shit,” she hisses. “Look, we can’t stay here much longer-”
She’s cut off by a loud bang. You’re so disoriented by the noise your hands drop to your sides. At the same moment, you hear wood splintering and cracking beside you. What has to be the largest tree in the forest creaks before it begins its descent down towards you both.
You don’t what happened, or what they used, but it doesn’t matter. The wall in front of you is fading. You have seconds to get out of the way of the bullets and the tree, you’re not sure either of you is going to make it.
“Jean!” There’s a flash of brown hair and Jean’s being tackled to the ground, safely out of the way of the tree and bullets. You feel something stinging against your shoulder and know the first bullet’s made its way through.
You also see the tree is almost over top of you. You’ve always been a fight response in flight or fight scenarios. But when there’s nothing to fight, when you have nothing to go up against, you freeze. It’s horrible, you know it, but there’s nothing you can do about it.
Even as you’re desperately screaming at yourself to just fucking move, all you can do is watch as the tree topples down on top of you. “Flux, duck!” The words trigger something in your brain just soon enough to drop to the ground.
Scott releases a red beam, blasting through the tree and knocking it off course. You don’t even register the smell of burning flesh as you lay in the mud. Your blood is rushing so fast in your veins, there’s so much adrenaline pumping through you, you can’t focus on anything except the sound of your heartbeat.
You let out a breath of relief, slowly lifting yourself up to your knees. You don’t hear any more fighting and you figure whoever they hadn’t taken down before, the beam took care of the rest.
You look down, checking yourself for any bullet holes or serious damage but you can’t find anything. Something warm trickles down your shoulder, it drips across your arm and down your hand.
You look at the blood curiously, it seems to steady a flow from the simple bullet graze you’d had earlier. “Oh my god,” Jean whispers your name and you turn around with a concerned look.
You want to ask her what’s wrong but your eyes are trained on the way Logan’s arms are bracketing her. He’s practically on top of her, only now getting up to check on you. You get it, it was a stressful situation, he acted fast.
But that doesn’t make it any easier to swallow the lump in your throat. It doesn’t ease the burn of betrayal. He saved her, not you. He chose her even though she doesn’t want him. The anger you’re feeling only makes it harder to be aware of your surroundings.
It’s not until Scott kneels behind you a presses a gentle hand against your back that you lurch forward with a loud cry. The pain slams down on you all at once. The wind blowing gently against your back feels like someone’s dug razor blades in your skin and ripped.
Feet rush towards you, someone kneeling beside you and grabbing your shoulders. Logan forces you up and makes you look at him before his gaze turns to your back. “What the fuck did you do?” He practically growls, lunging towards Scott.
He grabs him by the collar and shoves him into the dirt. Ororo and Jean leap forward, trying unsuccessfully to rip him off. You try and keep your eyes open, try and stay focused. The pain is too much, you don’t want to be awake for this anymore. Every nerve on your back feels like it’s being forcefully exposed and plucked at.
Your brain forces a shutdown and you slump into the mud, the world going black.
When you wake up, you’re on your stomach. You’re a little dazed, not fully remembering how you got here. You try and sit up but there’s a steady grip around your wrists stopping you. “Don’t move,” Jean warns from somewhere behind you.
You try and look for her but you can’t move much. Your head feels like it weighs a hundred pounds, stuck to the pillow beneath you. “What happened? Why can’t I move?”
Her shoes appear in front of you and then she’s kneeling down, a slightly worried look on her face. “We needed to make sure you didn’t roll over in your sleep.” Her brows crinkle and she frowns, “You don’t remember?” You shake your head minutely. She sighs, lifting her hand to your face and pressing her chilled fingers to your temple.
The images rush towards you. You see it all from her eyes. The way Logan had grabbed her and thrown her to the ground, checking over her and not once looking at you. How Scott had tried to stop the tree from breaking your spine. His beam had just barely grazed your back as you had ducked. But it was enough for there to be serious damage.
Through her view, you can see the way your skin had bubbled up and blistered. How horribly damaged it was. You have limited healing abilities, but it was enough to stop the nerves from being permanently damaged.
She lets you go and you groan, the pain slowly registering in your brain. It’s dulled and you don’t know if they’ve given you drugs or if your abilities are still working to help you. “How’s Scott?”
She chuckles and shakes her head while she undoes the restraints around your wrist. “He feels awful. He keeps coming by to check on you.”
The thought of him sitting beside you while you were strapped down to the bed makes you feel a little bad. It wasn’t his fault, he’d helped you. It was more than Logan had done for you.
You frown, hating yourself for being bitter. If he hadn’t helped, Jean might not be here next to you. He had saved your friend. The thought didn’t bring much comfort, though. “I’m not mad at him.”
Jean eases you onto your knees and slowly helps you sit up. It causes minimal pain, but it’s still uncomfortable enough to grit your teeth and dig your nails into your palms. “I know, but he’ll probably be coming down here a lot to check on you.”
You almost ask her if anyone else has visited. If Logan had, but you don’t think her answer would make you feel any better. “He did,” she tells you and you click your tongue in irritation.
“Out of my head,” you warn. She releases you with a small grin. “I don’t care,” you tell her, trying to appear nonchalant.
She tilts her head, eyes narrowing on you. “Yes, you do. And I don’t need telepathy to know.” She walks towards your IV bag, fiddling around with something on the line. “He was here whenever he could be, practically lived beside you.”
“Don’t care,” you tell her again, but there’s less conviction this time.
Jean frowns and you hate how guilty she looks. It’s not her fault he’s desperately in love with her and not you. You can’t force someone to love you or choose you. And you don’t want to. You want someone to love you for who you are, not because they couldn’t have their first choice.
“Don’t,” you say lowly. “Don’t apologize, it’s not your fault.”
She doesn’t get a chance to say anything before the door bursts open, both Logan and Scott sliding into your room. Scott lets out a relieved breath when he sees you. He breathes out your name and approaches with a guilty smile, “You’re awake.”
“Charles told us,” Logan informs. You offer him a brief glance before diverting your attention to Scott.
Petty, you’re aware. But you don’t want to see Logan right now. You’d put so much effort and time into your friendship with him. It doesn’t even matter if he doesn’t feel the same way about you. You two are best friends, and he didn’t even try to help you when you needed him the most.
So, you smile at Scott. You forgive him and you tell him you're fine. You chat with him and Jean while Logan just stares at you from the other side of your bed. You can’t make yourself face him. You don’t want to look at him, it makes you sick to your stomach.
Eventually, Scott’s guilt is slightly assuaged and he and Jean leave for the night. Logan is a heavy presence beside you, one you no longer can ignore. You shift around, pretending to fluff your pillows until he grabs your hand.
“What’re you doing?”
You look at his hand and then at him. Whatever look is on your face is enough for him to release you and back off. “Getting comfortable,” you spit out, more venom in your voice than necessary. Something clicks for him, you can see it as it happens.
He backs up and narrows his eyes down at you. “Right.” He frowns and sucks on his teeth, nodding his head silently. “I’ll come back when you’re feeling a little better.” You don’t miss the hidden dig underneath it all, the way he’s calling out you’re unusual behavior.
“I think that’d be best.”
He scoffs and shakes his head, slamming the door behind him as he leaves. You jump at the noise and it makes you hiss as a twinge of pain shoots down your spine. You feel slightly guilty about the whole interaction. Then, you remember the way he’d been cradling Jean and you feel slightly vindicated.
You’re sure he doesn’t even give a shit. He’s probably pouting in his room, wishing Jean was in bed beside him.
What the fuck?
It’s all that’s been playing through Logan’s head since he returned from your room in the medbay. He’s waited days for you to wake up, so he can finally take a breath and let go of the anxiety that’s been plaguing him.
He’d thought that he’d lost you in that forest. When he’d gone for Jean, he’d assumed you’d just be able to use your powers to knock the tree out of your path. Or make it melt around you.
Honestly, he can’t put a finger on what exactly he was thinking. But he knew that you could protect yourself and that would be your priority. So he’d moved without really thinking and grabbed the person who would be collateral damage if your powers went haywire.
And then you hadn’t saved yourself and all he could smell was your burning flesh. The smell has been stuck in his nose since you were brought back to the mansion. He can’t escape it. Everywhere he goes, he sees you burning and hears your screams.
He’d thought that you were dead and there was a moment where he genuinely was so lost he could do nothing but watch as the others swarmed you. He couldn’t move, couldn’t help you. He could only stare at your still body and pray to anybody who could hear him that you weren’t dead.
He didn’t know what he would do if he lost you before he ever got a chance to love you.
He’d, irritatingly, imagined all the different ways he would finally tell you how he felt when you woke up. He’d prepared himself for every possible reaction, except this one. He hadn’t expected you to reject him before he ever got the chance to confess.
Anger stews within him as he paces through his room. He knows that it’s unfair to be upset with you. You’d gone through something horrific and there had been doubts about your recovery. Of course, you’d act off.
Except, you only seemed to be directing that at him. Had you been just as dismissive to Scott, the person who actually hurt you, he would have looked past it. He’s tempted to go back down and see you again, maybe try and make you see some sense.
Instead, he decides to give you both some time to calm down. He doesn’t want to do anything he might regret while he’s pissed off. He’ll see you tomorrow and, hopefully, you’ll be back to normal.
You’d thought Logan might have gotten the hint with how you behaved earlier. That was not the case. He’s back today and you can smell the breakfast food he’s brought you. The smell is wafting deliciously from an inconspicuous brown bag.
But you know it’s from the restaurant that’s twenty minutes out of his way. You’re not petty enough that you can’t appreciate the forty-minute round trip he’d taken for you, but you still aren’t excited to see him.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he smiles at you despite your clearly hostile energy. He tugs the chair towards your bed, ripping open the bag and pulling out enough food for the both of you.
You think it should be considered a form of manipulation to call you that while you’re pissed at him. He has such a clear effect on you. You know he’s aware of it. He knows that when he calls you something sweet like that it makes your heart race and stomach flip.
You turn your gaze towards your blanket. You pretend the thread pattern is the most interesting thing in the world so you don’t have to look at him. You’re sick of giving your all to men who couldn’t care less about you.
You’re tired of being the second, third, fourth choice. You want someone to choose you first for once. And you genuinely thought Logan would be the man to do that. But he’d chosen Jean. You should have known.
“Alright,” he huffs, crossing his arms and glaring at you. You’re pissed off that he’s acting like he’s the one who was hurt. “What the hell is your problem? You’ve never been this mad at me before.”
It’s his tone of voice that really grates on you. He genuinely does not understand what he’s done wrong. He doesn’t even comprehend the possibility that you might be mad he left you to die. Have you really become such a doormat?
Yes, you’re shy and generally reserved with the people you meet. But he is so different. You two met and it was an instant connection that you thought was reciprocated. You hadn't realized that you'd become so complacent in the relationship he thought he could get away with something like this with no repercussions.
“You left me to die,” you snap at him, voice taking a pitch it never has before. You’ve never truly gotten angry at him. Pissed off sometimes when he teased you a little too much. But you’d never plainly shown anger at him. “You fucking left me behind and expect me to, what,” you scoff and shove the food back towards him.
“You think some shitty breakfast is going to fix this?” His face contorts. It screws up into something like hurt and you worry you might have been too harsh. He doesn’t know how you feel about him. He doesn’t know that this would hurt you so bad.
But, it doesn’t matter. You’re still his friend. You should have at least warranted a little concern.
Just as quickly as it appeared, the hurt is washed away by his own anger. “I thought you could take care of yourself. Isn’t that what you’re always bitching at us about?”
If you weren’t so upset you might find it funny how quickly the two of you turned on each other. Clearly, there was something repressed between the two of you. Some brewing resentment that neither of you had ever acknowledged. The words are coming quickly now, without thought.
“Fuck you, Logan,” you snap back at him. “You didn’t give a shit whether I lived or died. You only cared about your precious Jean.” You spit out her name with so much venom it stings as it leaves your tongue.
He laughs, getting out of his chair. He shakes his head and glares at you. His anger is always a physical thing. You know he’s pacing so he doesn’t do something worse, like destroy the entirety of the room.
“That’s what this is, you’re jealous? Don’t blame your fucking incompetence on me.” You hate the way he’s speaking to you. Like you’re a little girl who's incapable of understanding even the most basic of concepts. He has such a patronizing look on his face, you want nothing more than to wipe it off.
The tables beside you tremble, the vases of flowers rattling against the wood. “I’m your friend, Logan. You could at least pretend like you cared about me.”
He leans against the end of the bed, tilting himself forward until he’s aggressively imposing your space. You shrink back against the pillows, narrowing your eyes in disdain. “Don’t fucking pull that shit with me. I knew that your priority would be to save yourself and I acted accordingly. This wasn’t some goddamn ploy to get into Jean’s pants. Grow the fuck up, Flux!”
You flinch back at the volume of his voice. Unwillingly, tears pool in the corners of your eyes. It’s an involuntary response. Sometimes you just get so enraged that you have no other way to get rid of it than to cry. It’s infuriating to see the moment someone stops taking you seriously and starts to think you’re nothing more than a crybaby.
Logan’s face pales and he winces, backing away from you. “I didn’t-”
“Enough,” you stop him, voice thick with unshed tears. He never calls you by your X-men name, it’s an unspoken agreement between the two of you. That’s a formality reserved for the other members. To each other, you’re nothing more than two people who care deeply for one another.
Or, you had been. Before this one moment had blown your life and your back up.
“I appreciate how much faith you have in my abilities, but the fact that your first instinct wasn’t even to protect me says a lot.” You take in a deep breath and shake your head. “Thanks for the breakfast, but can you please just leave?”
He looks like he doesn’t want to. You know he doesn’t want to leave. You two never fight like this. Even if there wasn’t a lot said, it’s still not normal for you. Maybe that should have been your first hint that things weren’t what you thought.
It’s healthy to fight, to a certain extent. Sometimes it's needed. You two never have before and you know it’s just been brewing for a while, waiting to blow up. “I-”
“Get out,” you shout, and the tables beside you finally crumble under the weight of your emotions. They drip to the ground in an inorganic form of liquid wood. “Shit,” you hiss, glancing over at them. You wave your hand and they return to their normal state, but it doesn’t matter. You shouldn’t have lost control at all.
The door slams and you look up to find the room empty. You sink back against your bed and run your hands over your face. You ignore the way the skin of your back screams in protest.
You embrace the pain, the fiery shocks running up your nerves as the bandages chafe against the wounds. You focus on that instead of how things have ended with Logan. You always had such high hopes that he might be the one you finally man up and confess to.
You should have known you were wrong. You should have known that it would never have ended with him picking you over her.
You’re permitted to leave the medbay the next day. You don’t see or hear from Logan for the following week. You can’t confirm if he’s purposefully avoiding you or not but you have to believe he is. You both live in the same hall. You don’t know how it’s possible to have gone this long without even catching a slight glimpse of him.
You force yourself to suffocate the part of you that misses him. You picture the side of yourself that longs for his presence and imagine shoving a pillow over her face. You don’t want to ache and cry over someone who doesn’t give two shits about you.
You keep reminding yourself over and over again that when things got rough he showed you his true colors. But it’s more difficult than you imagined to just completely disregard so much history with him.
Besides, you hadn’t realized just how little you interacted with the others until Logan was out of your daily life. It’s so difficult for you to bond with people that when you’d connected with Logan you’d latched onto him.
It’s a little pathetic, honestly. Being grown and eating lunch alone because you only had one friend. You wonder if your feelings for him were genuine or born from a desperation not to be alone. You don’t let yourself linger on the question for long.
It’s as your training with the students that you finally see him again.
“Has he made much progress yet?”
Jean shakes her head and purses her lips. She watches as Billy, one of the newer students, struggles with the logs in front of him. He was a firestarter, a very inexperienced one who had only ever set his curtains on fire.
His powers were more focused on the mental aspect of things rather than the physical. Which is why you and Jean were in charge of helping him. He couldn’t start anything on his own, he only really seemed to be able to activate the ability when he was emotionally stimulated.
That meant whenever he was mad or sad, or anything in between, everyone in a fifty-foot radius was in danger. He was a risk to the other students and you were both trying to be gentle with him. But you’d been working with him for so long and there was so little progress. It felt like he wasn’t trying sometimes.
He’d asked Rogue out a week ago and when she’d said no, her hair had caught on fire. You know he could have been hurt and lashed out without thought or malice behind it. But you’d seen the look in his eye.
You’re fifty percent sure he knows exactly what he’s doing. This little act he puts on is just to get himself out of trouble. You hadn’t brought the issue to Charles yet because you’re trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.
“Billy,” you call out. His head whips up and he sends you a vicious glare. You can’t help the sneer on your lips. “Just take a deep breath and try again. There’s nothing wrong with struggling, we all did.”
You put on your normal teacher voice, calm and collected. Assuring. But the little shit in front of you isn’t buying it for a second. He gives you a sarcastic little grin, “Right. Sorry, I forgot you’re a fuck-up just like me.”
“Billy!” Jean snaps, taking a step forward to reprimand him. She doesn’t get far before there’s a fireball shooting out of his palms and hurtling towards the both of you.
There’s no chance to react before something slams into your side and is tossing you to the ground. Your head nearly snaps against the grass but there’s a hand underneath your skull softening the blow.
You smell something smoking and look up to see a large scorch mark right where you’d just been. Jean’s standing over it, palm outstretched as she keeps the fire subdued. She gives you a worried look, “Are you okay?”
Surprisingly, yes. You glance up to see Logan hovering over you. He backs off when he notices you’re okay, getting to his knees and offering you a hand. Wordlessly, you slip your palm into his and let him help you into a sitting position.
“You alright,” his hand hovers over your shoulder like he wants to pull you closer. But he resists, backing off and waiting for your answer. You nod your head, still a little dazed from the failed assassination attempt.
He narrows his eyes, searching your face for any sign of head trauma. When he’s properly assured you’re okay he jumps to his feet. “Billy!” His voice booms across the courtyard and it’s the first time you’ve ever seen that little asshole scared.
He’s barely on his feet before Logan is stalking towards him, jerking him forward by the scruff of his neck and dragging him towards the mansion. “We need to have a little talk,” the tone of his voice has you a little scared and you’re not even the one he’s mad at.
Jean walks towards you and helps you to your feet. “Is your back okay?”
“Yeah,” you nod and brush your clothes off. You have to physically shake the shock of what happened off. “Yeah, I’m fine. I can’t believe he did that.”
Jean scoffs and glares towards Billy’s back. Your eyes widen in shock when you see the large scorch mark across his arm. “Jean! He got you, are you okay?”
She glances down at her shirt and frowns. “Yeah, practically a sunburn.” She gives you a reassuring smile, “I’ll be fine.”
As shitty as this sounds, you’re not concerned for her. You can only focus on the fact that she was in just as much danger as you and Logan had tackled you to the ground. You glance back towards the mansion, more fucking confused than ever.
You’re not sure what compels you to follow Logan, but you’re running after him before Jean can stop you. He’s barely got a minute headstart on you, you’re not sure why you can’t find him. You’d gone through every inch of the first floor.
You don’t know where he would have dragged Billy, but it’s nowhere you can find. After about ten minutes of looking for him, you give up on the hope that you’re ever going to figure out what’s happening inside his brain.
You let out a defeated sigh, running a hand over your face and trying to shake off the funk of the day. You can’t believe that little shit tried to roast you. You’re not comfortable with the fact that he’s just roaming around inside the mansion somewhere.
You turn out of the living room and nearly slam into someone. His hands shoot out, grabbing your shoulders and gently stopping you. “Logan,” you give him a strained smile. “I was looking for you.” You glance over his shoulder and frown. “Where’s Billy?”
Logan sighs, his hands linger on your arms for a moment before he takes a step back. “Wheels got to him before I could do anything.”
You laugh a little, the noise involuntary. “What were you planning on doing with the sixteen-year-old?”
He doesn’t find the question amusing if his expression is anything to go by. “He was really trying to hurt you.”
His words sober you up slightly and you drop the flippant attitude. “Yeah, I wanted to,” god, it feels like you could choke on the words. Just last week you were screaming at him for not helping you. Now, you could barely thank him because he had.
“You’re always my priority.” He tells you before you can struggle any longer. Your head shoots up and you stare at him with confusion. He groans, the noise tired and resigned. “Saving Jean was a mistake. I mean it, kid, I just thought you could handle yourself.”
You open your mouth but he stops you before you can argue. “I know, that’s not the point. I should have saved you, no matter what I thought you could or couldn't handle.”
“No,” you stop him and shake your head. “No, Logan, I shouldn’t. I,” your mouth opens and he stares at you expectantly. What you were going to say gets stuck in your throat. This is a horrible idea.
“I liked you in a way you didn’t like me and it was unfair of me to push my expectations onto you.” You wanted it to sound better, and more intelligent. Instead, it came out in one rushed breath and you’re not sure he even understood half of what you said.
His brows furrow in confusion for a moment before a smile breaks out on his face. You’re not sure if it’s a good or bad thing that he’s smiling. You can’t tell if he’s mocking you or about to profess his undying love.
You don’t have to wonder for long. He moves closer towards you, leaning forward until you’re practically sharing the same breaths. Unconsciously, you’re drawn into him, hands braced gently on his chest as you chase after him.
“What are you doing?” Your whispered words brush against his lips and he gives you a small smile. His hands travel up your waist. He tugs you closer, his other hand looping around your neck and craning you up.
“I’m gonna choose you every fucking time, kid.” His lips brush across your own and it’s like a switch is flipped in you both. Your arms twine around his neck, pulling him down until you’re practically melting into him.
It’s everything you’ve ever wanted and so different at the same time. You always thought your first kiss would be after some cheesy first date. He would have taken you out to dinner. Something would have inevitably gone wrong, you spilled something on your dress or the waiter brought the wrong order.
You would both worry that it was a sign that nothing would work out between you. And then, at the end of the night, he’d tug you into his arms and kiss you like you were the most precious thing he’d ever held.
That would be nice, but this is better. He’s not holding you like you’re something fragile or something too precious for this world. He’s kissing you like you’re the very air he needs to survive. He’s greedy with his affections and demanding with his wants.
You’re being consumed and devoured. And you never want to stop. This is all you’ve ever wanted with him, from him.
Sadly, you do have to breathe. You’re the one that forces the stop, you’re sure he would have happily suffocated if it meant he could keep touching you like this. You pull back, the air coming in short pants between your parted lips.
You can already feel them swelling, the slight irritation on your cheeks from his stubble. You don’t mind, you quite like the feeling. He speaks before you can, a pleased smile on his face. “Forgive me yet?”
You chuckle, a little impressed by how cheeky he is, still slightly pissed off. “Why don’t you do that again and I’ll think about it?”
He rolls his eyes but you can see the smile fighting against his firm glare. “You’re really gonna make me work for it, huh?”
You smile and nod, leaning into him again. “You’re never gonna hear the end of it,” you whisper before dipping down and kissing him again. You can’t believe you ever doubted just how much he cares for you.
He didn’t choose Jean over you. He’s just a dumbass.
a/n: I had to resist putting in a “pick me, choose me, love me” line in there bc that would have just been too much lol
end. — I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
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