#getting what darcy and his change actually mean

[sunshinechay]

Might be too soon to call but I think so far, Step By Step is actually doing the Mr Darcy transformation correctly…?

[bethanydelleman]

Because today I woke up a chose violence, I'm going to point out everything wrong with this scene in 1995 P&P:

Upon seeing Wickham and Denny, Lydia crassly calls across the street and the gentlemen walk to her, though in the book she is not as vulgar.

All were struck with the stranger’s air, all wondered who he could be; and Kitty and Lydia, determined if possible to find out, led the way across the street, under pretence of wanting something in an opposite shop, and fortunately had just gained the pavement, when the two gentlemen, turning back, had reached the same spot.

This change is likely an attempt to display Lydia's vulgarity, but it goes overboard. She has enough propriety to not call across a street.

Lydia suggesting that Wickham come to their Aunt Phillips' makes Mary give Mr. Collins this side eye:

However, Mary shouldn't even be present:

Lydia’s intention of walking to Meryton was not forgotten: every sister except Mary agreed to go with her; and Mr. Collins was to attend them

This builds up the Mary/Mr. Collins ship, something the book does not do.

Only Bingley joins the party upon seeing the Bennets, though Darcy also joins in the book:

On distinguishing the ladies of the group the two gentlemen came directly towards them, and began the usual civilities. Bingley was the principal spokesman, and Miss Bennet the principal object. He was then, he said, on his way to Longbourn on purpose to inquire after her. Mr. Darcy corroborated it with a bow, and was beginning to determine not to fix his eyes on Elizabeth, when they were suddenly arrested by the sight of the stranger

Mr. Darcy not coming down off his horse to say hello makes him ruder than he is in the book.

Now here is the biggest issue:

Mr. Wickham touches his hat, Darcy just rides away. That is also not what happens:

Mr. Wickham, after a few moments, touched his hat—a salutation which Mr. Darcy just deigned to return. What could be the meaning of it? It was impossible to imagine; it was impossible not to long to know. In another minute Mr. Bingley, but without seeming to have noticed what passed, took leave and rode on with his friend.

Also, Darcy 1995 just freaking abandoned Bingley! That is very rude.

Does any of this matter? They are small changes but I would argue they are significant. Many people tell me that Mary was so in love with Mr. Collins, and her coming to Meryton and sharing a glance with Mr. Collins supports that theory. Darcy's strict sense of propriety is lost in these scenes, he's quite openly rude, even to Bingley! And Lydia is made worse than she is, she also insults Kitty:

Kitty asks if a bonnet will look good on her and Lydia replies:

Lydia never insults Kitty in the novel (though she does brag about her trip to Brighton). It's actually odd, since Kitty and Lydia are very close in the novel. 1995 makes their relationship more toxic than the book portrays.

Also, the actor playing Wickham was 38 during this mini? He looks his age here. Wickham is most likely 26 years old during the action of Pride & Prejudice.

But mostly, everyone tells me 1995 is SO accurate, but it does get important things wrong or different enough from the book that people remember them incorrectly. I just want to point out that this adaptation takes many liberties and isn't perfect. *ducks and runs away*

[calcifiedunderland]

Pride and Prejudice: A TWSTed AU

The Schemer of the Scalding Sands: J. Viper

Introduction, or pick another route!

Jamil x GN Reader

Warnings: Najma and Kalim are wingmen, Jamil insults you Darcy-style (he doesn’t mean it <3 ), P&P-level angst, descriptions of being extremely high in the air (magic carpet ride <3 )

Notes: ngl i became a jamil stan while writing this fic

———

Kalim was being quiet, Jamil thought as he glanced at the clock. Too quiet.

It was late evening, and usually around this time Kalim would be knocking on Jamil’s dorm room asking for him to cook something. Or for homework help. Or to plan a party. Or all three, plus something else. Usually, Jamil couldn’t go more than half an hour without Kalim coming around, but this evening had been oddly peaceful, so something had to be afoot.

He pushed away from his desk and headed down the hall to the dorm leader’s room, pressing an ear against his door. Good, he’s in the room. Judging by Kalim’s voice, he wasn’t in immediate danger. Good, good. Still, he should just make sure. He rapped his knuckles against the door and walked in without waiting, “Kalim, I came to check-“

He stopped in shock, eyes widening and a frown forming. Kalim was on his stomach on his bed video chatting with someone on his phone, legs kicking in the air cheerfully. That was all fine, except-

“Najma?!” Jamil screeched, diving to Kalim to get a better look. “Why are you calling Kalim?!”

“Dude, calm down,” Najma deadpanned. Kalim grinned, “yeah, it’s all fine Jamil! We were just talking about you actually-“

“What?!” Jamil wrenched the phone from Kalim, and dodged his hands. “Najma! You should be doing your homework not talking to Kalim-“

“Jamil can you relax?” Najma drawled, leaning back on her bed. “I just called Kalim to see if you were actually doing your job.” Not really, it was to make sure Jamil wasn’t overstressing himself. Clearly he was. She suddenly smirked, and changed the topic. “Kalim said you were close to that (name) person you brought to the Yasamina Silk festival. They seemed cool, but now they seem great.”

Jamil was indignant. “Don’t listen to him Najma. And Kalim! You-!” Jamil turned to glare at him, then immediately calmed his voice and face. “You should eat something, it’s getting late.” Kalim’s eyes widened and he looked at the time, “you’re right! We should see if the rest of the dorm is hungry too! We could all have dinner together!” He dashed out of the room without waiting for Jamil, who sighed and turned back to Kalim’s phone. “I’d better go after him, take care of yourself, Najma.” “Okay, bye~”

Najma sighed and slumped against her bed. Jamil seems to really like this (name), and they seemed pretty nice when we met. Not to mention, Jamil seemed happy they were there… it’d be nice for him to loosen up too. In the very few times he’d spoken about you to her, he seemed… almost cheerful. Very unlike the high-strung, perfectionist brother she knew. Even though Jamil was still her older brother, she still worried about him a little bit. It’d be nice if he had someone to loosen him up, who he genuinely liked.

She thought back to the festival, where you and Jamil shared a melon with one another. Sure, you may have not known that one Scalding Sands legend, where if you shared that melon with someone, your friendship (or romance!) would last forever. Or maybe you did know.

Either way, she knew her brother well enough that he wouldn’t slip up with splitting the melon like that. He may not believe in superstition, but a Scalding Sands legend was still a legend.

She thought for a bit, and then smirked and picked up her phone. Oh yeah. It’s all coming together. She just needed to get Kalim on board now.

———

Jamil was staring at you again.

It was out of the corner of his eye, and he kept looking away, but you just knew. Because he’d been doing it for the past few months, ever since the Scalding Sands event you’d crashed with Grim.

Granted, you were surprised he even let you go with him and Kalim, given how annoyed he looked at the extra guests (between you two, Trey, Cater, and Malleus, it was an unforgettable trip indeed). And you and Jamil sort of reached a… truce, of sorts, after his overblot.

You didn’t know how you felt ever since he’d basically imprisoned you and Grim in Scarabia, and all the things he’d said about you. Sure, after all of that went down, you were pissed and a little hurt. You’d thought that you’d made a friend in a new dorm, (two, counting Kalim, who really was your friend) but instead he was just using you. And now, the two of you were in a strange stalemate, and surprisingly, saw each other somewhat often.

While running odd errands for Crowley, sometimes you passed by the gym. You’d see Ace and Floyd, and also Jamil playing basketball, and invariably Jamil would become distracted. Floyd even loudly complained about that when a stray shot from Jamil hit him in the head. Then, at some point he’d offered to tutor you in Alchemy, saying that Kalim needed help too, so he’d just be getting two birds with one stone. And then Kalim would throw parties practically every fortnight and sic Jamil on your tail, begging you to come.

You supposed Kalim felt extremely grateful for helping him understand Jamil, but frankly you wanted to be left in peace. Still, when you did accept Kalim’s invitation, you sort of… enjoyed the small talk you made with Jamil, commenting on his cooking and sometimes helping him in the kitchen to get away from the crowds. At some point, the two of you even began meeting up to just… vibe.

Sometimes you’d meet with him in the kitchens, watching him cook while you did your homework, and occasionally cook with him. At some point, you’d take over from him and cook in his place, just to give the poor guy a break. This wasn’t something you took lightly, given how overprotective Jamil was over Kalim - the two of you reached a nice… whatever it was.

Still, you felt like he was uneasy around you. Why else would he keep staring at you, hovering over you, and ask you pointed questions? One moment he’d be more lax around you, chatting and bantering, and the next he’d be… venomous. It wasn’t like you could tell anyone about his overblot. You technically didn’t exist in this universe, anyway, so his secret was safe with you.

You heard a knock coming from the Ramshackle front door, and went to open it. In front of you stood Kalim and Jamil. Wait, no… sat.

They were both seated on Kalim’s flying carpet, the Housewarden beaming at you while Jamil looked tired and a bit peeved. “Hey, (name)!” The carpet waved its tassels at you. “Hey guys, I’m fine, but… why are you here?” Kalim grinned sunnily at you, “we wanted to see you! You should take a break and walk with us!” You glanced at Jamil, who was a little quiet, looking at you intently.

“I can’t, I’m…” you failed to think of an excuse, kicking yourself mentally, “…alright, sure.” Ugh, why did you agree?

Kalim cheered, and the three of you went along the path outside of Ramshackle. Kalim insisted that Jamil stayed on the carpet, even after he suggested he walk with you. “(Name), you should sit with us!” He smiled at you, something mischievous in his eyes. That’s a little… odd? Although it was Kalim after all. He did have some impulsive tendencies.

You gently took Jamil’s hand, surprised he’d even offered to help you up, and sat carefully on the carpet. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Jamil flex the hand he held yours with. You scoffed, “dude, I don’t have rabies or anything. You’re not infected with my hand.” Jamil frowned and opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, Kalim jumped off the carpet. “Now, remember what we talked about! Go, carpet!”

Immediately, the carpet lurched forward. “Kalim, what did you do?!” Jamil gasped as the carpet began rising higher and faster. Your eyes widened and you instinctively grabbed the front of the carpet, “KALIM! Jamil stop the-!” You were cut off as the carpet zoomed up into the sky, leaving no trace except your shrieks and Jamil’s shouts. Nonetheless, Kalim smiled proudly at his handiwork, now Jamil and the Prefect can have some quality time together! Pleased, he pulled out his phone.

Kalim: its done! Jamil and (name) are in a whole new world of love now!!!!!!! \^o^/

On the other end of the chat, Najma grinned, and texted back:

Najma: YESSSSSSSS all according to plan >:)

———

You had been through a lot when you first arrived to NRC. Between living in Ramshackle, fighting overblots, dodging Floyds and Rooks, and shouldering Crowley’s responsibilities, you’ve dealt with your fair share of wildness.

But this? This was new.

You screamed as the carpet seemed to lurch higher and higher into the air, gripping the front of it for dear life. Your stomach flip-flopped wildly, and you tried to not projectile vomit in mid-air. The air rushed past your ears, cold and practically ripping through your skin. You could barely hear anything over the sound of wind, let alone Jamil yelling beside you.

At last, the carpet settled, and you felt extremely lightheaded. Your brain was static at this point, and you moved to lean on both hands when Jamil grabbed your wrist. “Do not look down.”

Well damn, you can’t tell me what to do, Jamil. That made you immediately look over the edge, and you regretted it instantly. The school was barely larger than a postage stamp, and you could practically see the borders of Sage’s Island with how high up you were. It was chilly too - you both were surrounded by clouds, and it was darker than you’d thought. It was probably about to rain - not that you’d know, being above the damn rainclouds.

Beside you, Jamil was beyond exasperated. If he seemed tense before, now he was just pissed. His hand on your wrist tightened, and he leaned closer to you. “Don’t. Look down.” His eyes flashed angrily at you, and you withered under his gaze, gripping the carpet tighter. He turned his eyes to your hands, gently putting his hands over yours.

“Look, I’ll steer the carpet downward, but you need to follow my lead.” He made you look at him. His dark eyes held your gaze, and for a moment you really did feel like you were in the clouds. That the world was just you and Jamil, high above everything on this terrifying carpet ride.

“Do you trust me?” You saw his lips move, but it sounded far away, like he was speaking through water. Maybe it was the altitude messing with your head, but Jamil looked so focused on you. You’d never seen him look at anything like this, so gently.

“Do you trust me?” Jamil tightened his hands over yours, and you were brought back to reality. You nodded, and he sighed. “Good. We’re going to go forward.” Carefully, he tipped the carpet, and you took in a sharp breath when you went forward. The two of you inched downwards, and the school became larger and larger until finally you both touched down in Scarabia.

Jamil clasped your hand in his and lead you off the carpet, silent. He had a deep frown on his face, and his dark eyes were even stormier than the skies. He didn’t get off the carpet with you, but clenched his hands after he helped you off. This was the second time it’s happened, he doesn’t think you have cooties or something right?

“Thanks, Jamil…” You looked at him, hoping he’d maybe lighten up a bit now that you were on the ground, but he refused to look at you, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. “Just… stay here. I’m going to put the carpet away, just…I don’t need any more trouble.” As he walked away, you felt his words settle heavily in your gut. I’m just trouble for him? It’s not like I caused the carpet to go sky-high…

Still, you sat on the luxurious couch in the Scarabia common room, and tried to relax. Surprisingly, it was quiet - it seemed that everyone had gone to bed. It was a nice change from Ramshackle, at least. You shut your eyes, beginning to feel tired. After a while, you groggily awoke to a mop of white hair and red eyes exclaiming at you.

“(Name)! What are you doing here?! What about Jamil?! I thought you were up in the sky on your magic carpet ride!” Kalim blabbered while you tried to get your bearings back. He seemed… worried? He put his hand to his chin, thinking. “Well, maybe I could find an empty room and put you both in it-“

“Kalim.” The Housewarden immediately fell silent, spinning to Jamil with wide eyes, smiling at him. “Jamil! Don’t worry, we can still fix this!” Jamil’s frown deepened in confusion, “Kalim, what are you-“ “And the Prefect is still here!” Kalim pointed at you, and you went on alert as Jamil zeroed in on you, seemingly forgetting you were still here.

Kalim continued cheerfully, eyes steeling in happy-go-lucky determination. “And there’s still time! You can get back out on the carpet, there’s still stars out!” Jamil wrenched his eyes back to Kalim, mouth curling into a snarl and arms tensing. “Kalim, what are you talking about?”

“To confess!”

The silence was stifling. You stared wide-eyed at Jamil, who stared incredulously at Kalim, who still smiled innocently. Finally, Jamil seemed to temper himself and said through gritted teeth, “Kalim, go back to your room.”

Kalim placed his hands on his hips, “no way! We still have to-“ “Kalim.” Even though you didn’t know either of them as long as they knew each other, something in Jamil’s voice sapped Kalim of his energy. Kalim’s eyes widened, and after a moment, he left the room. You opened your mouth, but didn’t know what to say.

You watched as Jamil sighed irritably, running a hand through his long bangs. You slouched on the Scarabia couch, watching him pace and huff to himself. What had you done to earn his annoyance? He’s the one who basically kidnapped you on a flying rug. Surely he couldn’t dislike you that much.

“Kalim doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” he said at last, and you frowned deeply. “What? Kalim isn’t stupid, Jamil,” you said sharply, losing your patience, “and what in Seven’s name is up with you?

“Look, you’re-“ Jamil stopped, clearing his throat. He smoothed over his expression, face becoming the usual calm-and-composed Vice Housewarden that he always showed to the world, but not you. “Nothing is wrong.” You finally snapped, exhausted and utterly spent, “what is going on? You’ve been acting weird with me ever since winter break!” Jamil grit his teeth, but you continued. “What is your deal, Jamil?! I thought we were friends! What have I done to make you hate me this much?!”

“You’ve been a thorn in my side since you’ve come here!” Jamil yelled, stopping pacing in front of you. His chest heaved, and he had that angry-crazed look on his face he always got when exasperated. “You’re too clever for your own good! And ever since my…” he swallowed, starting to lose his momentum as he realized what he was saying, “last winter, you’ve shown yourself to be someone…interesting.” Finally, he seemed marginally calmer. “And… I don’t think I could’ve dealt with all of this without you, even though you’re the last person who I thought could help.”

Your frown deepened. You opened your mouth to say something, but Jamil hurriedly continued, shutting his eyes. “Look, I know that I inconvenienced you, but… you’re always on my mind, when I should be thinking about attending Kalim. You’re-“

“Alright, that’s it.” You stood up from the couch, and walked off without sparing a glance. Jamil stopped, sputtering, and cried out “you’re just going to leave?!” You spun on your heel, glaring at him. “Yes! I’m leaving so I don’t cause a bigger mess!” Jamil shut up immediately, and you stalked to him, poking his chest hard. “You have done nothing but insult me. What happened today, with the carpet, was not my fault. If anything, you made me into a thorn in your side.” He flinched, but you blazed on. He didn’t get to hurt and belittle you.

“You hurt the entire dorm with your overblot,” you seethed, “and you didn't inconvenience me. You imprisoned me and Grim in your little scheme. And I have tried to be nice to you since then, and I thought we were becoming friends, but you just seem to hate me every time you see me. So fine,” you backed off, throwing your hands up as you left, “I’m leaving, Jamil. I’m leaving.”

Jamil didn’t know how long he stood there after you’d left. The Scarabia common room seemed to get chillier as the night passed, but he couldn’t find it in himself to go back to his dorm. At some point, he found himself on the couch drifting in and out of sleep, wondering why things were the way they were, and why he just couldn’t be lucky. Before he closed his eyes, utterly defeated, his last thought was, I deserved that. But not them.

———

The next few weeks passed without a hitch, although you were still brimming with dulled hurt every time you saw Jamil and Kalim.

Even though you had nothing against Kalim, Jamil always slunk behind him like a shadow, making you uncomfortable every time the sunny housewarden bounded up to you. Somehow, it felt like Kalim came up to you even more often than before. You’d supposed that maybe Kalim was trying to mend things between you and Jamil, but while he had the best intentions, it was really up to Jamil. Still, you thought, you weren’t exactly kind when you last… spoke to him.

Every time you spoke to Kalim, you tried to gently but firmly turn his invitations down. This time, he seemed adamant that you come to tonight’s party, basically begging you to attend.

“Please, Prefect!” He grabbed your hand pleadingly, “it’ll be fun! The Pop Music club will be playing, and Jamil’s cooking all your favorites-“

“Kalim, let’s go.” You were jarred to hear Jamil speak up, and Kalim actually listen to him rather than brushing it off. Kalim looked at Jamil, who continued, “We need to head back to the dorm and prepare. And…” Jamil avoided your eyes, “please, don’t trouble the Prefect.”

As the two of them left, you felt their absence weigh on you. It had been a while since you’d hung out with Jamil - so you took to cooking alone in Ramshackle or Heartslabyul, and tried studying by yourself. On nights when Scarabia was having a party, you tried to not think about when you and Jamil would hang out in the kitchen, or when you and Kalim would drag him out to the dance floor to loosen up. Still, your Friday nights were getting drearier by the week, even when you tried reading Prejudice and Pride to take your mind off it.

In the gym, the basketball club was in full swing, and Ace and Jamil chatted while passing the ball to each other. “Yeah, sure, I can try to get them to come tonight,” Ace began dribbling the ball, then smirked at Jamil. “Didn’t know you missed them so much though!” Jamil frowned, flushing. “I just… Najma wanted to see them again. That’s all.”

Ace shrugged and passed the ball, “alright, guess I’ll see you later.” Later that day, you frowned at the text you got from Ace, wondering how you should respond. At this point, you’d attempted to avoid Scarabia at all costs, but it had been a while. Even then, you still wanted to see Kalim and Jamil one last time - and at least you’d be with your friends.

Ace: hey theres a party at scarabia tonight, Jamil wants you to go

Ace: so u wanna go or what

You: sure, I’ll be there. Meet u at the mirror in ten

———

You, Grim, Ace, Deuce, and Cater stepped into Scarabia. Immediately Cater ran off to find Lilia and Kalim, and you got separated from Ace and Deuce while trying to cross the dance floor. At some point Grim perked up as he smelled food wafting in the air, and made a beeline for the kitchen. You ran after him, dodging the partygoers (and at some point almost crashing into Lilia, Kalim, and the drum set) until you found yourself standing in the Scarabia kitchen.

Grim bounded over to Jamil, who was standing over the stove stirring a large pot. “Jamil! What’s cookin’?” Grim’s eyes were shining, and he strained to look up. You heard laughter from behind you, and a voice saying “hey, it’s the Prefect!” Jamil’s head snapped back to where you stood. You looked behind you, jaw dropping, “Najma?! What are you doing here?” She grinned at you, and you followed her to Jamil.

“I just wanted to see Jamil! And Kalim said he was having a party today,” she hugged you tightly. “I haven’t seen you since the festival! Jamil keeps talking about you too!” You made eye contact with Jamil over Najma’s shoulder. He looks like a deer in the headlights.

“Najma, let the Prefect go,” Jamil recovered quickly, and she let go reluctantly, pouting. You turned your attention to the pot, “hey, are you making curry? I thought Kalim hated that.”

Grim stood at attention, “whatever it is, I want some!” Jamil sighed, “I already made the food for the party, this is for Najma.” And you, if you showed up. Najma scrunched her nose, “I don’t want that, it’s too… plain.” Plain? You glanced into the very fragrant pot, swirling with spices and oil.

“You’re going to eat. You didn’t have lunch, baba will be mad if he finds out I didn’t feed you,” Jamil spooned some curry onto a plate and Najma crossed her arms. “It’s fine, but you still make your food look too plain. Like, garnish it or something. I know (name) can probably make it better!” She handed the plate to Grim, and as you picked Grim up to place him on a chair to eat, you frowned.

“My cooking isn’t that great, Najma. Jamil taught me some stuff, but still.” Najma looked confusedly at her brother, “but he says you cook so well!” Jamil gaped at her, while your eyes widened. Najma gave her brother a look, and continued, “he loves your cooking! And he said he loves cooking with you! And-”

“Jamil!” Finally you cut her off, as Jamil looked one second away from smothering her, “I didn’t know you liked my cooking?” You felt your nervousness from the party melt, and smiled hesitantly at him. He seemed to soften a little, “Yeah… it’s nice to have the company,” he cleared his throat. Why did it feel so hot in the kitchen?

Najma watched the both of you stare at each other, then clapped her hands together, making you both flinch. “Alright! This is enough. You need to get out.” As she strode out of the kitchen, you both watched her confused. “Najma, where are you going?,” Jamil called, but she didn’t answer. Grim shrugged, finishing off the curry, “Wow! Jamil, the food tasted so good!” You and Jamil stood in silence, before you both opened your mouths to speak.

“Jamil, I’m sorry for yelling-”

“I didn’t mean to hurt you (name)-”

Your eyes widened, and you both fell into an awkwardness. You were about to open your mouth, but then Najma kicked in the door. “Both of you! Out!~” Trailing behind her was… “Why’s the carpet here?!” Jamil yelled, “Najma that’s a precious heirloom of the al-Asim family! You can’t just-!” The carpet wrapped around both of you and Jamil and began pushing you out of the dorm to the outside, being lead by Najma, who cackled gleefully.

“Okay carpet! Two times is the charm! Go!” The carpet seemed to nod? and then unfurled itself from around you two. It swept underneath your and Jamils’ feet, and began rising gently in the air, unlike last time. Jamil was shouting at Najma, looking down but you weren’t focused on him. Rather, you were looking up.

“Jamil,” you nudged him softly. “Not now, Prefect,” he grumbled. “Jamil, look.” He finally sat down on the carpet, and his mouth hung open in shock. The two of you were in the sky again, but not as high this time. All around you, the stars twinkled brightly in the night, and nebulae swirled across the sky. There were barely any clouds. It was slightly chilly, but Jamil’s warmth next to you was enough to keep you fine. Rather, the goosebumps on your arms were from other things.

“It’s beautiful up here,” you breathed, and Jamil glanced at you. “Yeah, it is.” Jamil could feel his stresses slowly dissipate, and while you both were up in the sky, it felt like the world was only you and him, and the twinkling of the stars above you both. His mind wandered to the old Scalding Sands legend. Was this how the princess and her lover felt when they were courting?

You looked over at Jamil, gently grabbing his hand. In the calm of the night, Jamil seemed a little… less put-upon. Like he could finally speak freely. He cleared his throat, lost in thought. “I… got ahead of myself before,” he finally said, shifting uncomfortably on the carpet.

“I never got to tell you, but I’m sorry,” his voice cracked. “I’m sorry for trapping you and Grim in Scarabia. You’re not a thorn in my side, what I meant was… you were always there. And at first, I hated it. I didn’t trust you. You were like a thorn in my side, because you were always there. But…” You waited for him to continue, all the anger and hurt leaving you in the cool night air.

“I began to like your presence. Like I could relax when you were there, because you could help with Kalim, or keep me company while cooking, or just-” Jamil seemed a little choked up now, is he ok? “Be there. I never felt like that… just…-”

“Supported,” you finished, and he nodded, swallowing thickly. You both stayed quiet, until you spoke. “I didn’t mean to yell at you. I just… You always seemed to either like me or hate me?” You felt jittery just saying it out loud, “sometimes we’d be fine, but sometimes you’d just… avoid me. And it hurt.”

Jamil squeezed your hand softly, and you sighed, “And I never know what you’re thinking. I really don’t know if you just kept me around for Kalim, or if we were actually…” friends. Jamil moved closer to you. “...I do like being with you. I… I do.”

Jamil turned your chin so you’d face him. He took a deep breath, “Kalim wanted me to… confess,” the word sounded like a hiss. “I thought he was getting ahead of himself as usual but then I…” he hesitated, “I realized he was right. And Najma was right. I did… I have feelings for you, and somewhere along the way I started… loving you.” His voice became quiet, and he averted his eyes from yours, as if expecting you to be angry. To his surprise, you weren’t.

You cut him off, gently pressing your lips against his cheek. His eyes widened, barely believing it. Him? Of all people, him?

“I really wanted you to not hate me,” you confessed, face feeling warm despite the chill. “I… really do like you, Jamil. I like what you can do, and I like you. And I think somewhere along the way…”

You squeezed his hand tightly, making him look at you with a smile on your face, “I started loving you too.” You softly closed the distance between you, finally ending the weeks of inner turmoil.

Jamil softly cupped your face, looking into your eyes, then kissed you gently, as if he couldn’t believe that this was real. You wrapped your hand around the hand on your face, squeezing it softly. You were here. You moved to clasp him tighter, and he wrapped an arm around your waist, holding you tighter.

Quietly in the chilled night, if anyone cared to look up into the starry sky, they would have seen two newfound lovers finally together, exchanging stolen kisses and chuckling amongst themselves. Lucky for them, the only witnesses to them were the stars above, and two teenagers standing outside Scarabia.

Hands on her hips, Najma proudly stared up into the sky, squinting at the shadowed figures on the carpet. Wordlessly, she held up her hand, and Kalim high-fived her, grinning.

“Mission accomplished!~”

~END

———

Notes: this got so long bc of the introduction with Najma but I just had to include her and Kalim conspiring together! Anyway, hope you enjoyed the Jamil chapter, thank you so much for reading!!!!!!

Taglist: @cerisescherries, @eclecticprincecollector, @ars-tral, @thehollowwriter, @twst-eeps, @casperandcats, @ttokkisbee, @mitsuriswaifu, @parad-ice-lostandfound

@sad-sie, @moyo5653,

(If your username is in bold, it means I wasn’t able to tag you properly 😅)

[firthbetterorfirthworse]

Pride & Prejudice: A New Musical (2020)

god help me, I am on my knees

I adored this. It was a delight. Did they change things? Of course, once again proving that my heart is a fickle creature; changing things is terrible and insulting unless of course, I happen to like the change, in which case it is unique and commendable and wonderful.

Occasionally I come across a show that makes me wish I was rich enough to fund a vanity project solely so I can perform in it, and this was one of those.

In the US, this is currently on Tubi which is a free service and I am extremely grateful for it.

Mary and Jane are given lines that make us laugh for very different reasons, in character, which I adore. For instance, Mary is the one who announces where each scene is taking place, and gets more annoyed that it's her job as the show goes on.

There's an adorable duet with Bingley and Jane about the things they would say, if they weren't so shy. This Bingley is so shy he becomes tongue-tied, which is not the usual depiction of gregarious Bingley but I feel is still true to the heart of Bingley's character.

Caroline gives the best sign-offs to her letters, "yours ever, Caroline Bingleyyyyyyyy" in the flattest affect possible. It's passive aggressive and beautiful.

The banter between Darcy and Elizabeth is at Netherfield is so quick, which I really appreciate - makes it seem more like a quarrel, and leads to this beautiful perfect moment that is what introduced me to the show. If all you watch of it is this 20 seconds, it's worth it:

Darcy's songs are more of a pop vibe than I would have expected, but Justin Mortelliti rocks it so well I love it anyway.

There's a fantastic Collins song where all the Bennet ladies are lined up and he's singing about picking who will have the honor of his hand, and the Bennets are singing a counterpoint that is essentially oh please no don't pick me. And Elizabeth gets a fun, fairly comedic refusal song.

Lady Catherine gets a surprisingly almost jazzy song, with a chorus of servants talking about how grateful they are for her advice. At one point she makes a rebuttal and Darcy guffaws loudly until he abruptly slaps his hand over his mouth.

If you don't know the rules of musical theatre, when the emotion becomes too much for words, song breaks out, which means Elizabeth starts singing during her refusal of the proposal scene (love). This Darcy actually opens his mouth to defend himself, but Elizabeth refuses to listen. Leading to an amazing line in the next scene "I've written you a letter - since clearly I found 'speaking' far too challenging." (Also, the bitter Darcy song after her rejection? yes please. Fuckin' Broadway tenors and their ridiculous range, man, sure just pop those high notes and make my soul thrill that's fine I didn't need to have equilibrium today)

Jane has a beautiful song and reprise about how she's definitely not going to think about Bingley any more.

Cute scene where they run into each other at Pemberley. This Darcy spies Elizabeth and sneaks up on her, which is fun.

Did I become immediately obsessed with Darcy's song "The World She Lives In" where Darcy sings about how he's a better man because of Elizabeth, and listen to it on repeat? Yes, yes I did.

There's a fantastic song about being ruined that really captures the despair a lot of movies can't.

When Bingley and Darcy return to Longbourn at the end, Bingley is so shy he can't speak. He sings about what he would say, but in reality says nothing. It's comedic and wonderful.

And the writers love us - they really love us! - they gave us a scene of Darcy rehearsing what he's going to say to Elizabeth and despairing at his inability to speak in her presence: "Miss Bennet, how good it is to see you again...........and after that I'm blank. Maddening."

Of course it's all happily ever after and I may or may not have watched it twice before even posting this. And then someone showed me a list of other P&P musicals, which I will now be watching ALL OF because I love both of those things and them converging delight me beyond reason.

Anyway. Go watch it. Just watching this made up for watching all those hallmark movies. Joy.

[unluckyhoneybee]

and for sway? could you write for sway about dating a bi girl? She comes out to him after a couple of months of dating which leads him to a spiral of thoughts and insecurity

Note: first time writing for Sway!

Warnings: the ask says it all.

Jeremy kissed the top of your head and got up. You watched him walk in the kitchen and as soon as he was out of view you ran your hands over you hair in distress. Your nerves were eating you alive.

For the two months you had officially been dating Jeremy and the tien you had spent getting to know each other, you hadn't been able to talk with him about this huge part of yourself. It wasn't that you didn't trust him, but you had a couple of previous bad experiences and had grown extra cautious. Now that you knew there wasn't nothing to fear with him, you were trying to bring it up someway. Was it a film with your first girl crush a good opportunity?

"Hey" Jeremy fell next to you in the sofa and kissed your shoulder. "You are staying tonight, right?"

"Mhm" You kissed his cheek and leaned on his body.

Jeremy hadn't mentioned it, but he had noticed how you seemed more lost in your thoughts than normally.

"All good?" He hugged your shoulders and you sighed.

"Yeah"

He sighed too and moved you so you were looking at him. Then he grabbed your chin.

"C'mon" He playfully tapped your lips with his thumb. "I won't pressure you to talk, but I'm here if you want to. You love this film, YN. You haven't told me anything about Mr Darcy or Liz yet. About the hand scene, where are those giggles and feet kicking?"

You chuckled and moved a bit closer. You decided to go for a kiss first, your mind playing games and telling you maybe it was the last one.

"There is something" You made a pause "About the film, actually"

Jeremy brushed some hair out of your face. "Go on"

You took a deep breaths and then needed so much time to form the words that Jeremy's face fell slowly. His grin disappeared and instead he slowly frowned.

"YN..."

"I think I'm bisexual"

One, two, three, four, twenty seconds, thirty...

"Jeremy?" There it was. Ice cold expression and surprised eyes. You were ready for the fall. "Please say something"

Your voice, showing how scared you were, pulled him out of trance.

"Yeah, uh... You think?"

"I am. I am bisexual, Jeremy" You said with shaky voice.

"Oh" He licked his lips and ran the hand that wasn't keeping you close to him over his hair.

You felt your feelings raw. You felt really vulnerable.

"Oh? That's all" You cleared your throat and moved to sit straight but Jeremy thought you were leaving so he put his hand on your lower back.

"Wait, no, no" He cupped your cheek and made you look at him. "It's fine. I'm sorry I didn't react well. You caught me out of guard there"

You swallowed and leaned into his touch, which made him relax and smile.

"Just... What does it have to do with the film?" The funny tone on his voice made you chuckle.

"Uh... That's my first girl crush" You said pointing back.

"Keira?"

"Mhm. Can't blame a girl who grew watching Elisabeth Swan becoming the Pirate Queen, can you?"

Jeremy laughed loudly. "I can't, I can't. I see your vision in there"

You giggled and looked down at you hand on his chest. You fell in silence as Jeremy comforted you with his hand in your back. He caressed up and down as he observed your face.

"Are you feeling better now?"

You were tired, to be honest. "Yeah, kind of relaxed now. Took a weight off my shoulders"

Jeremy kissed your forehead.

"Don't need to worry about me, okay?"

"Yeah, I know. I trust you"

"Good"

You cupped his jaw. "and you? I understand if you need time"

"No! No, no. I'm fine. All good"

"Yeah? You don't mind I'm bi, for real? And don't make a threesome joke or I'll strangle you"

"Does it change something? Between us, I mean"

"Uh, no" You said. "I suppose. If you don't mind I also like girls, it doesn't change anything"

"I don't mind. It's just you, my girl, in the end."

You nodded with a smile and kissed his lips. "Thank you for telling me" He said when you pulled back. It was completely sincere. It felt so food to be trusted like this.

But that night, when you were already asleep and tightly grabbing onto his biceps, he laid there with his eyes open and running thoughts.

"So, YN is into girls too"

"Mhm" Jeremy nodded. "We talk during breakfast and when basically said that she is into more than just men. More than one genre"

"Okay" Linus nodded.

Jeremy respected you and your sexuality but was a mess with terms, so he asked you to explain stuff to him.

"What's the problem? Are you okay with it?"

"For sure, yeah" Jeremy nodded furiously. "I'm completely okay with her. I fell in love with YN for a reason"

"Cool then" Linus patted his shoulder. "But tell me te real problem, Sway"

Jeremy sighed. "I don't know why she told me just now. I mean, we know each other for a while, when started going out months ago and we have been a couple for two months"

Linus frowned.

"What if she has met someone?"

"Sway..."

"Ully, maybe she has met a girl. And she has told me now. Or maybe she is discovering things now. She said at first she thought she was. Maybe there is someone and she has a crush on them and she is doubting..."

Linus grabbed Sways shoulder. "Listen, you said she had a crush on the pirates of the Caribbean girl. That was what? 2005?"

"Yeah, around then"

"I don't think she has met anyone" Linus sighed. "Plus, you should ask her directly instead"

"I don't want to offend her"

"Sway, I think it's just that you are insecure"

Jeremy looked at his pads laying on the floor. Suddenly they were so interesting.

"Why would I?"

"This is knew for you. You really like this girl. You don't want to loose her. Easy"

Jeremy looked up again. "Why did she took so long then?"

"Ask her, Jeremy" Linus hugged his shoulders.

"Okay"

A couple of days later, when he arrived from the road trip, Jeremy drove directly to yours. He noticed a little bi flag bracelet in your wrist and smiled to himself.

"How was the flight?" You kissed his lips gently.

"Good"

"Go and get comfy, I'm making dinner"

"You are an angel." Jeremy kissed your cheek and moved to your bedroom.

You were happier and more smiley now that you didn't feel the need to hide from him and he liked that, but it was him now who seemed a bit lost.

"Now it's you." You said after dinner when you were clearing the kitchen. "I know that loss was hard but..."

"It's not the loss" He whispered.

You walked to him and hugged his waist. Jeremy laid back on the counter and grabbed your hips.

"Then?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah"

Jeremy swallowed the lump on his throat and then cupped your face.

"I don't want to offend you"

"Jeremy..."

"Why did you need so much time to tell me?" He asked. "I'm not throwing it at your face or anything but... Does it have to do with me?"

"Jeremy, honey..." You put a hand on your chest right over his heart. "It's not you"

He patiently waited for more.

"I've had a couple of bad experiences" You started slowly. "I told people who I was and they didn't react well, so since then I give myself time to make sure it's a safe space. And you are the safest I have felt with someone"

Jeremy moved his thumb over your cheek.

"I really love you, Jeremy." You said for the first time. "It's just that sometimes it's scary to be open like this. I know now that it would have been okay even if I told you sooner"

Jeremy felt a bit stupid. He leaned and kissed you deep and slow. You loved him.

"I really love you too, YN" He said with a huge smile.

"That's really cool, huh?"

"Super cool, yeah"

You both laughed and moved to press your foreheads together.

"Are you feeling better now?"

"Yeah. Just felt a bit insecure"

"About?"

"Why would you date me if you could date a girl?"

"Because you are Jeremy Swayman and give the best hugs ever, plus you are the sweetest and funniest guy I've met. And it has nothing to do with my sexuality. I met you and I liked you and then I fell in love with you. You make me extremely happy."

"Oh dear..." He kissed you deeply once more. "Linus wants to meet you. And I want you to meet him. I hope you don't mind I talked to him but I was a bit lost."

You chuckled. "The moment I told you I knew you would tell him, silly"

Jeremy laughed and pinched your but.

"I love you so much" He said.

"I love you too"

"Then? Dead man's chest?"

"Absolutely"

[rickktish]

A list of mutable batfam headcanons that live inside my brain:

Steph deserves to be 6’ minimum, preferably 6’1” or 2”

Bruce is constantly trying to balance his need to be at the same eye level or above the people he’s intimidating vs his need to do his funky little gargoyle crouch. His favorite thing about the GCPD roof is that it has lots of surfaces he can crouch on and still meet or look down at Gordon’s eye level

Tim and Damian suffer from “too similar to get along” disease and must either become best friends or despise each other until the end of time

Babs prefers light, natural toned makeup. Steph prefers pops of color and decent amounts of jewelry when she can get away with it. Cass prefers jewelry and no makeup at all

Jason’s comfort meals are all variations on soup served with bread for dipping

Jason is of the opinion that Fitzwilliam Darcy is an ass at the beginning of the book and it’s a good thing he decided to change himself so he could take his place as Best Fictional Man Ever. Dick, who read the book in order to be able to connect with Jason better, is of the opinion that Fitzwilliam Darcy has done nothing wrong ever and only needed to work on his social skills, meaning that it’s his improved ability to communicate that makes him worthy of Elizabeth Bennet at the end. Neither of them wants to listen to Tim’s analysis of what this says about their relationships with Bruce

Duke has never engaged in non-Alfred approved chaos. This is not because Duke seeks Alfred’s approval, but rather because their senses of humor are in perfect alignment and Alfred is always pleased to discover that he approves of Duke’s particular instances of chaos even after the fact

Damian never had stuffed animals growing up, but after being corrupted by Dick’s influence he can no longer sleep without a minimum of one in his bed

Damian collects posters and articulable action figures. His favorite ones are the ones that can stand on their own, which he uses for posing practice in his drawings. His favorite figure is of one of the characters in Cheese Vikings who has a zuko-esque backstory and a secret propensity for gardening

Dick always buys the most beat up box of cereal at the grocery store because he feels bad for them

Cass loves not only ballet, but other works by classical composers as well. She will unironically listen to the local classical station, and can identify the Borodin String Quartet by the sound of their instruments alone

Tim and Bruce watch and read Gray Ghost media in all its various forms and discuss it together as a bonding activity

Alfred and Jason’s shared birthday is usually celebrated with them making each other cakes, meaning that everyone gets to enjoy not one but two cakes for the day

Jason specializes in cheesecake above all other cakes, though he did make Damian a black forest cake for his birthday once right after he’d finished playing Portal

Literally everyone is surprised when they learn that Damian plays video games. No one has ever once looked at him and thought “yeah, i bet that kid plays console games” and he’s actually really insecure about it, but he also refuses to wear any kind of merch outside the house. He owns dozens of gaming and anime T-shirts but refuses to be seen as anything but completely neutral outside his own territory

Most of the bats wear drug-detecting nail polish at all times, though the base and reactive colors vary by the bat in question

Bruce and Dick have both had therapists straightup quit on them and are therefore reluctant to go back to therapy ever again

Duke’s favorite book is Walden Pond

Alfred read Lord of the Rings aloud to Bruce when he was a kid

[burningvelvet]

I officially finished Pride and Prejudice yesterday! Some more rambles to add to the ongoing collection:

1 Learning that Wickham and Lydia are on the downward path I predicted is really satisfying for some reason. Just the image of the classic rake being forced to marry the unruly teen he had a fling with and then being forced to deal with the repercussions of his actions for the first time in his life — so good considering he seemingly believed he could partake in ruining her reputation and get away with it. And Lydia isn’t consciously suffering (although in reality, her prospects/reputation have indeed suffered) because she’s so oblivious to the misfortune around her that she thinks her life is much better than it is. It’s all just so true to life imo. Nothing is black-and-white. Every family has the worrisome trainwreck couple and these two are the perfect representation of that. Also, Wickham/Lydia give me major Byron/Claire Clairmont vibes (my fellow Romanticists iykyk).

2 Elizabeth’s conversation with Lady Catherine was so nerve-wracking. Elizabeth handled it so well, which surprised me. Toward the end of the novel I was getting a sense that Elizabeth had really come into her own self & seeing how expressive she became in comparison to some of the other women around her was very refreshing.

3 Elizabeth and Darcy’s long conversation while walking was actually cute, I can’t lie. I didn’t really find Darcy personally appealing at first, but he grew on me — which I’m aware was the intention — but due to the popularity of the romantic elements of the story in popular media and film adaptations, I was really surprised just how little Darcy and Elizabeth interacted if we take into account the entire length of the novel and how many actual conversations they had. It’s more realistic that way due to how things like travel, socializing, and marriage were conducted back then. I think for the sake of modern audiences and modern concepts of romance/etc., adaptations and maybe even fans themselves really overemphasize the romantic elements of the story. What I mean is that it is a love story, yes, but our concepts of love in the Anglosphere have changed a lot since Austen’s time. Adaptations reflect this change, although they also probably skew the reader’s reception of the original novel. Alternatively, the Georgian era was a bit more lively than we regularly think, which is seen by Wickham/Lydia’s rendezvous, and so we could also interpret the novel as containing more passion covertly hidden beneath the pages. There are a lot of ways to interpret the concepts of love/romance as shown in the novel.

4 Lydia is truly her mother’s daughter imo. I don’t have a thought-out argument to defend this opinion but it definitely showed that Lydia was her mother’s favorite and Elizabeth was her father’s favorite — and interestingly, they married two men who were enemies to each other, and diametrically opposed in personality. I think one of the biggest takeaways from the novel is that the Bennet parents were an ill-suited match and so their children are having this struggle of trying not to repeat the generational curse — in Lydia’s case she fails like her parents did, whereas Elizabeth and Jane manage well.

5 I routinely forgot that Mary Bennet existed. Like was she even in the novel or was I just zoning out every time she appeared? Lmao

6 Mr. Bennet sarcastically saying that he loves Wickham and Collins more than Darcy and Bingley because the former two amuse him more and give him free entertainment… same tbh!

7 It’s interesting how all the men and women function as foils for each other and represent various reactions to the system they live in. Mrs. Bennet, Mrs. Bingley, Lady Catherine, Mrs. Gardiner, are all interesting to compare to each other, and Mr. Collins, Mr. Bingley, Mr. Wickham, Mr. Darcy, Mr. Bennet, Mr. Gardiner are also in that way very neatly comparable.

8 I’m biased because I’ve studied Shakespeare but I really got a big Shakespeare vibe the entire time. I saw someone on here post that the novel may have been inspired by Much Ado specifically and I completely agree! I looked it up and there have been articles and academic papers writing about the influence of Shakespeare on Austen and P&P particularly, so we’re not alone here.

— Overall, I’ve been pleasantly surprised to find that I enjoyed this book way more than I thought I would! If none of you have read it, or are only familiar with adaptations, definitely give it a try.

[nalyra-dreaming]

"Lestat does become a reader in later books, though not as much as Louis, but that just as a note. "

For many reasons never read after TotBT. Rest is all what google & reddit have for spoilers for me.

"As for s3... I mean, if Lestat and Louis really did reunite, then his reaction to the book will be not as extreme as if they did not. So it will be very interesting to see how they will spin it.

AND it will be very interesting to see what the Talamasca may have edited - cut? Or added.

And if the meeting happened then THAT might factor into what Lestat does this time round. Because the Talamasca are wayyyy more involved already, and I do not think we have seen the last of them.

I do not know yet how it will come together. A lot of "what ifs" depend on whether the meeting actually happened, or not - and how much time has passed. "

One hand there is a chance reunion being reality but (Devil is at details, Taxi driver called the hurricane Odette which happened in 2021 at Philippines) equal chance for it being Louis's attempt to cope w discovering truth about his survival and 70 decade long husband.Obviously it made him question his perspective on Lestat and his memory, his feelings. When he is extremely challenged he manifests Lestat's presence.

On the other hand he did leave the penthouse in blink of an eye and went somewhere far too.

Reunion being a reality or not changes Loustat's vibe bc Louis was honest and comforting toward Lestat for the first time. It was so different from dynamic of their marriage.

Whole thing was suprising, hopeful and healing. I sense ultimate target of Talamasca is Lestat and they know Louis is the way to reach him, get a reaction out of him. Raglan has some other intentions too. W/out reunion and what T thinks about whether to keep Loustat seperated or let them find their way back to each other is kind of capable of changing everything about Lestat's possible reaction to the book, to Louis.

It's all so ambiguous😭 but also exciting bc AR made so many choices that left me bitter toward a series once i so loved, Rolin keeps saying they won't let Louis and Daniel get lost at the sides which means several plot changes, much to book purists dismay i kinda look forward to it.

"But yes - I also hope for pining, and hope, and yearning. 

And the fierce, fiery, defiant determination to shield Louis. "

Can you imagine Louis realizing what Lestat ultimately trying to do w his extravagant actions then Lestat going all Darcy "It's all for you Louis, you must know i did it all for you🥺"

I WOULD DIE

Romance is so fxxing back!❤️‍🔥🌋🎸🎤🩸

It is 🙌🙌🙌 (And I do expect something like that!!!)

And I agree about the Talamasca‘s goal being Lestat, and going through Louis to get to him. Not sure why yet… maybe Akasha’s blood? They put such an emphasis on that in the flashbacks. Maybe they want the knowledge of where she is.

I love that Rolin picked the books for the show which contain Louis, Daniel, Lestat and Armand as (most of) the focus!!! I cannot wait what they make of it all, there is so much in it. And at least Anne gave Louis more room in the last books once more and gave even Daniel a nod… the show just… unapologetically using that is brilliant imho :)))

[puppyvenom]

crutchie - akb vs matthew duckett !!!!

alternatively titled - cast disabled people jesus christ

listen i am having so many thoughts and feelings about crutchie and at the risk of annoying the fuck out of my partner i am putting them on here instead!

prefacing this by saying:

i do not speak for all cripples

matthew’s duckett was my first real introduction to crutch and yes i am probably biased because of it (because matthew was an absolute sweetie when i met him)

i do not actually hate AKB as much as i dislike his crutchie

★

i think the main problem i have with his crutchie (and i understand that it is not entirely his fault at all!!!!) is that it’s so sanitised in so many ways. it is so of its time and not really in a good way, it came about in a period where representation wasn’t a big focus and i very much understand that, but i also hate it.

it’s so easy for disabled characters to fall into this weird ,sanitised, almost infantilising position, where their struggles are shown (abuse from the delanceys that was directly because of his disability, the fact he’s more likely to be put in the refuge because he’s seen as ‘weak’), but they’re bound by this kind of happy-go-lucky persona where they don’t show any real anger or upset. it’s fuelled by the abled need to see disabled characters as some sort of inspiration porn. “he’s crippled but look how happy he is despite that!!!!!! if he can do it i can too!!” he has this air of innocence and can-do-no-wrong that kinda falls a little flat compared to all his friends of the same age, and whilst this wouldn’t be a problem in itself, it fits a repeating pattern of the innocent, docile physically disabled person that is shown so much.

i loved matthew’s crutchie so much because he was so much more than that. he was happy, he was kind and an big laugh, but he didn’t shy away from being truly angry or scared (in the finale when he is brought back and cuffs snyder) and he was still a bit of a dick, he felt a lot more like he truly belonged. one of my favourite examples is at the start of the show the first time we see katherine, he helps one of the boys (i can’t remember which one) steal something from darcy and keeps it on him through the rest of the show. he’s as playful and annoying as the rest of them, shooting paper balls at them with his slingshot (especially during the finale, i love him so much for that). he has an attitude. he has the energy of a boy who was raised on the streets and knows what the fuck is what.

and thats what i think changes him the most for me. it’s all the same script (?) but it’s all so different when you think about how smart crutch actually is. i think the biggest change is my idea of him specifically when he’s being so nice to weasel at the beginning, when all the boys are being annoying and dicks, crutchie is so sweet. i don’t believe he’s doing that because he’s just such a nice guy who can look past weisel and the delancey’s being assholes to them, i think he realised quickly how to play the game. he’s gonna get sympathy, he knows that, and he knows if he acts all innocent and is overly kind, that they’ll somewhat pity him and he can use that to his advantage.

i hate being pitied by most people, i hate being looked at differently, like i’m almost helpless. but i also know how to use it to help myself, i know when i can play the poor little cripple card to my advantage. and i fully believe crutch does the same.

edited to add because i forgot to add this entire section in sorry!!

when i say sanitised i also mean literally. as in they made him cleaner. specifically in the finale again when he’s brought back from the refuge, broadway crutch looks way too clean. he’s a little bashed up but he’s not dirty. he doesn’t look like he’s been battered and then subjected to awful conditions. it takes away the impact of his time at the refuge. when he got back in the uk production they actively were disgusted by how much he smelled, because he’d just got out of a place where he couldn’t look after himself for a multitude of reasons. he suffered in there, mentally and physically, and in more ways than one. he was not given nice clean clothes and a pat on the back, he was taken out and put right back into the mess without much time to check himself over, without any time to process or heal.

i just think it has a much bigger impact when you can see, from his actual appearance and the other guys’ reactions, how much he actually struggled in there. they were glad to have him back of course, but it really drove home the point of how badly it affected him.

and once again in that scene, you could see the fear on his face and the anger when he faced snyder and when he made a move at him. he was fucking scared of the man that had subjected him to all of that. even when he was being a little goofy and put on the hat to handcuff him, there was still that fear, and there was evidence to why.

(end of edit)

but like i said, i don’t think it is entirely akb’s fault or his intention, he almost definitely wasn’t aware of the way it came off and how it perpetuates stereotypes. but it’s just another reason why giving disabled roles to disabled people is so important. plus we know how to use mobility aids properly

★

shoutout to my beloved partner who proof reads my shit and also is the reason i am into newsies . thank u babie @fizzloves-blog <3

[cwritesforfun]

Bring It On: Missy Pantone x Fem!Reader: Crush

Scene from the movie - italics and bold - I do not own the scene from the movie or the characters from, Bring It On. I did change bits of certain scenes and added my own of course hehe so yeah enjoy:) Y/N = Your Name & Bisexual for the sake of the story

Formatting changes weirdly during this so I’m sorry. I’m trying to have it fixed soon. WiFi sucks.

Masterlist

Y/N’s POV

Tryouts for the open spot are underwhelming. Whitney's sister, Jamie was okay, but she looked like she secretly didn't want to be here.

The door opens and a new girl walks in. She's hot.

You hear Whitney whisper, "Excuse me, where'd you park your Harley? Get rid of her." Courtney exclaims, "Tattoos are strictly prohibited. Sorry." The girl licks her middle finger and pushes on the tattoo to reveal it's fake. The girl says, "I got bored during fourth period." Whitney says, "You need to... Fill one of these out." The girl hands over the paper and says, "Did it."

Oh sh**! The girl glances over at the table and her eyes linger on yours for half a second longer than the others.

Darcy exclaims, "Missy, is it? Before we start...I'm afraid we're gonna need to make sure you can do a standing back tuck. Standard procedure. You understand." Missy asks, "Standing back handspring, back tuck ok?"

Missy does it flawlessly.

Whitney scoffs, "Where's this girl from, Romania?" Courtney asks, "Can she yell?" Torrance exclaims, "We'll try her out... Awesome! Oh, wow! Like, totally freak me out! I mean right on! The toros sure are number one!" Missy then yells, "I transferred from Los Angeles. Your school has no gymnastics team. This is a last resort." She glances around and then says, "Ok, so I've never cheered before. So what? How about something that actually requires neurons?" Whitney asks, "Front handspring, step out, rounded back handspring, Step out, rounded back handspring, full twisting layout."

Missy kills it again. WTF!?!!?

Torrance says, "Missy is bank." Courtney says, "Ahem! Bankrupt. We've already so decided on Jamie." You reply, "To be fair, my vote is for Missy." Torrance snaps, "Courtney, this is not a democracy. It's a cheer-ocracy. I'm sorry...but I'm overruling you. And thank you Y/N." Courtney snaps, "You are being a cheer-tator, Torrance, and a pain in my ass! We already voted. Besides, Missy looks like an uber-girl kisser and I mean a serious one."

This is why your team doesn't know you're bisexual... well except for Les, Jan, and Torrance. They're the only cool ones.

Missy leaves the gym.

Torrance says, "Courtney, I'm the captain. I'm pulling rank, and you can fall in line or not. If we're gonna be the best, we must have the best. Missy's the only one I saw with cheer potential, so be quiet!" Torrance then runs out after Missy.

You finish packing up then leave with Jan. Jan starts up his car and says, "So... team Missy, huh?" You laugh and say, "What? She's hot. You have to know that. She may not be your type, but you have eyes." He laughs and says, "Yeah, I'd definitely hit that. But... I won't. Do you think Courtney was jealous of that girl who put on a show for me?" You answer, "No, I doubt it. And that girl was trying out for cheer so not a private dance. You should've gotten her number to pay her a little visit." He replies, "I copied it off her tryout sheet." You reply, "Typical." He replies, "I am, thanks. We're at your place. Call Les and tell him." You laugh and say, "I will. Don't tell Courtney about it, okay?" He replies, "You know I won't. I may kiss and tell, but I don't share secrets." You hug him and get out of your car.

NEXT DAY -

You're sitting in English and Missy walks in. She talks to the teacher who tells her something and you see her walking toward you. She slides into the seat behind you and says, "Hi Y/N. I'm glad I have a class with you." You reply, "I'm glad too."

You have to partner up for a short project and you choose to work with Missy. You work together and design your poster. You manage to finish before class ends, so you just talk with her. Missy is very easy to talk to, which is really nice.

You're sitting with Torrance and two other girls at lunch when you see Missy. Torrance yells, "Missy! Over here!" Missy walks over and slides into the empty spot next to you. Torrance introduces her to the group and you all get to know each other more.

You head to the locker room after school for cheer practice and start changing. You hear, "Damn Y/N, you got fit over the summer." You turn to see Darcy saying that and you thank her. Courtney asks, "Darcy, are you into Y/N or something?" Darcy answers, "No, I'm just complimenting a friend. You should try it sometime." OH SNAP!!! Courtney points an angry finger at Missy and says, "I don't wanna hear anything from you, newbie. I can tell you want to comment." Missy holds her hands up in surrender.

As you head outside with the team, Missy says, "You do look good though, Y/N. Darcy was right." Omg ... You reply, "Thanks, Missy." :-) Les makes eye contact with you and winks.

After practice, you get into the car with Jan and Les. Les asks, "Guess what happened today at practice, Jan?" Jan asks, "What? I don't know. Torrance was being a little demanding?" Les answers, "She is captain of the team, but no. Missy complimented Y/N and said she looked good. What did she mean that Darcy was right?" You tell them about the locker room and about working with Missy on a project today. Jan says, "Missy is into you. I'm calling it now." You reply, "I think she's just being friendly." Les replies, "No, I think she's into you too. I bet if we ask Torrance, she'll agree." You laugh.

SKIP TIME... Missy’s POV ... I = Missy

Torrance asks, “You sure I can stay over at your house tonight?” I answer, “Totally fine. My parents are at some benefit, pouring themselves into bed around dawn.” Torrance excitedly says, “Good. We gotta start early. You’ll be a star cheerleader yet.” Jan says, “You know, all the cheerleaders in the world wouldn’t help our football team.” Les replies, “Man, it’s just wrong. Cheering for them is just plain mean.” Jan says, “Everyone comes to see you ladies anyway.” I ask, “Because we’re such fine athletes?” Jan sighs and says “Oh live with it. You'll be fighting off major ogles while we defend our sexuality." I ask, "'What is your sexuality?" Les says, "Well, Jan is straight, while I'm... Controversial." I ask, "Are you trying to tell me you're gay?" Les replies, "Yes ma'am." I ask, "And Courtney and Whitney-- they're together, right?" Les replies, "No. Are you kidding?" Jan says, "I don't think so. See, um, Courtney doesn't wear anything under her spankies." Les replies, "That's no excuse, Jan!" Jan says, "I can't help it if my digits slip occasionally." I laugh and say "Nah-uh. Slip? Where?" Les says, "Oh, come on, missy! Don't make him say it!" I gasp, "Oh, my god..." Jan sighs in enjoyment, "My god, too." Les says, "You're a sick man, Jan...anyone else you're wondering about on the squad?" How do I make it not obvious that I like Y/N? I answer, "Uh yeah... Darcy and Y/N." Les replies, "Well Darcy is straight, but she's experimented. She told me about her summer camp time with a girl. She's now with a guy from a rival football team... As for Y/N, she's bisexual, but the people in the car are the only ones who know. So don't tell the rest of the squad that you know." I ask, "Should you have told me that?" Jan answers, "Probably not, but we know that Y/N trusts you and we trust you." I ask, "Oh so she has mentioned me before?" Les asks, "What's it to you?" I ask, "Can I trust you all with a secret?" They all say yes and I exclaim, "I like Y/N and I've been crushing on her since auditions." Everyone gasps and Jan says, “Well I bet she likes you too.” I laugh and say, “I doubt it. With a mind and body like that, she could have anyone. I don’t deserve someone as perfect as her.” And then the team tries to hype me up about myself … should I try flirting with Y/N?

At Regional Championships - Y/N’s POV

Torrance walks in and exclaims, “Welcome to the world of competitive cheerleading!"

You look next to you at Missy who looks both lost and stunned. People part to meet with their other friends and you ask, “Missy, want to meet some of my friends from other schools?” Missy nods and asks, “Do you mind? I hate that I’d have to follow you around?” You smile and reply, “I don’t mind at all. You’re good company.” She smiles and says, “Okay then lead the way.”

You lead Missy to some of your friends and you introduce her to them. One of your friends, Becky, asks, “So Missy, any cute guys at school? Y/N never dates around or tells us if guys are cute, so we never hear anything about the dating scene.” Missy glances at you then turns back to Becky to answer, “No uh I can’t say any guys are cute. Any cute ones at your school?” Becky squeals and starts rambling about her crush with some interruptions with the true side of the story from my other friend, Jenny. Becky is boy crazy and boy obsessed. Becky also mainly does cheer to be near guys she finds attractive at sporting events. Jenny does cheer to be friends with Becky and because she is competitive. Jenny is more reserved and the only one of the two that knows I’m bisexual. I trust Becky, but also I do not.

Jan walks over and says, “Hey ladies, Torrance said she wants our squad to review our plans again. We don’t need to, but she wants to have control of the group…Y/N, why didn’t you tell me about your beautiful friends?” Becky blushes and Jenny rolls her eyes. You grab Jan’s arm and push him away from your friends as you wave bye to them.

You all go over your day plan then she tells everyone they’re free to keep mingling until practice. Les asks to talk to you privately for a minute, so you follow him. Les asks, “So I see you brought Missy around with you today, care to share more?” You laugh and say, “She looked lost when we first walked in. I didn’t want her to be alone; everyone left her at the entrance. I also like her company… and her. Just don’t tell people.” Les replies, “Your secret is safe with me. I have someone that I have my eye on too. He’s really cute and definitely gay. I just am nervous to ask him out.” You reply, “Oh please any guy would be lucky to date you. Just keep talking to him and see if you like where it leads. Get his number before today ends if you really want to see him again.”

You hang out with Torrance, Missy, Jenny, and Becky for the rest of the day.

You're alone refilling your water with Missy and Missy says, "Your friends earlier mentioned cute guys, so I guess they don't think girls are cute." You reply, "No, but Jenny and Becky kissed once when they were drunk at a party. They both claimed they regretted it, but I don't know what they think." She asks, "And what about you? Do you think any girls or guys are cute at school?" You wink and answer, "I do think there is someone cute at school. I like both genders though. What about you? Is there a cute girl at school?" She winks and answers, "Yeah, there is one." You finish filling your waters, step out of the line, and rejoin the group after that. Your brain is off the rest of the day wondering what to do.

Regional’s go poorly.

We somehow get to compete in the Nationals in Florida though!!! Torrance and Missy figured something out.

National’s Championship- Y/N’s POV

On the flight to National’s, Missy’s seat is next to yours with Torrance and Les across from you. Jan is behind you with Darcy who is trying to give Jan love advice. You try to distract yourself listening to them, but flight are not your thing. You feel your leg shaking a bit and Missy leans over to whisper, “Is everything okay?” You whisper back, “Yeah, I just am anxious about flying. I hate it. I usually fly with my mom though and she makes it better.” She whispers, “What does she do to help?” You whisper, “She uh rubs my hand calmly and she lets me sleep on her shoulder. She’s also my mom, so I feel safe around her. She sometimes talks to me, but I usually have my headphones on so I cannot hear her.” Missy whispers, “Wanna hold my hand?” You whisper, “Would you mind?” She shakes her head and whispers, “I’d be glad to help you. You’ve already been a huge help to me adjusting to a new school and I want to do some nice things for you.” You nod and she holds out her hand. You take it and she moves your interlocked fingers to rest on her leg. She then places a blanket over her legs including your hands and whispers, “I figured we don’t need the rest of the team being annoying about this. They’ll never let us live it down.” You nod and let out a small laugh. You then close your eyes and try to focus on your music.

After the flight, you all get to the hotel. People will be sharing rooms. Torrance, Missy, and you in one. Darcy got her own because her family is helping sponsor the squad. Others are also partnered off. The boys get their own room too.

In the room, Torrance says, “You two can take that bed. As Captain, I want my own bed.”

You set your stuff down then everyone takes turns showering. As Missy showers, Torrance walks over and whispers, “I don’t mind sharing a bed, but I want you to have more time with Missy. You two would be so cute together.” You laugh and whisper, “Thanks a lot, Captain… did Les tell you I like her?” Torrance smiles and whispers, “No, but you just did. I cannot believe you told Les before me. I’m offended. I thought we were closer than that. Well… are you going to ask her out?” You whisper, “Not yet… oh we held hands on the flight and I haven’t told Les yet. So now you know something before him.” She whispers, “Why did you hold hands? Omg, tell me all the details.”

You keep talking to Torrance until you hear Missy’s shower water stop. Torrance then quickly goes over to her side of the bed and flips on the TV. She turns on some home renovation show and Missy walks out. You shower next. Then it is Torrance's turn.

You sit on your side of the bed facing Missy and exclaim, "Missy, thanks again for holding my hand and being a calming presence on the flight. I don't think I could've done it without you." Missy smiles and replies, "Of course. I didn't mind helping you out or holding your hand." You smile and ask, "What color hair does your crush have?" She answers, "The same as yours." You ask, "And what about eye color?" She answers, "Same as yours again." You laugh and reply, "I'm starting to think you're describing me." She asks, "And what if I am?" You answer, "I wouldn't be opposed to a date when we get back home." She smiles widely and replies, "Good, I would be excited to take you out when we get back." :)

Torrance exits the bathroom, squeals with excitement, and asks, "Did you two finally confess your feelings? Please say yes!" You turn to her and answer, "Yeah we did." She jumps on the bed pulls you both into a hug and says, "I'm so happy. You two kept asking me how to ask out the other and I wanted it to happen."

Torrance pulls away, gets on her bed, and you all watch the TV a bit more until you yawn. The lights are switched off and you fall asleep.

You wake up to arms wrapped around you and you're happy you are going to date your crush.

Masterlist

[welldonebeca]

Android Hero (6)

WC: 1.6k words Warnings: Future AU. Tension. Robot Steve. Unhealthy relationships.

If you like my work, consider buying me a coffee or subscribing to my Patreon. It’s just $2 a month and helps a lot while I go through these hard times.

Masterlist

You could feel Wanda’s eyes on you as you looked over your schedule with Charlie, ready to just go out to lunch but want to make sure it didn’t disturb your day.

“I can set the meeting with your team for 3 pm, so if you’re back from yoga at 2:30, there’s half an hour for you to shower and get ready,” she suggested, pointing at the hologram in front of you. “And you’ll have an hour of lunch. If you send in your order now, it will be ready by the time you sit down.”

You nodded along.

“I like that,” you confirmed. “Just ask for the same one I got the last time I went there.”

She hummed a confirmation, and Wanda cleared her throat.

“Darcy, can you order for me too?” she asked. “I think I’ll cash in on that lunch invitation.”

You were a bit surprised as you turned to her. When was the last time you had lunch with one of your siblings to talk about anything but your company?

To be honest, you didn't even remember when you had asked her to have lunch.

“Of course, Miss Maximoff.”

She set up your orders and Wanda opened the door for you to get out of the office, following to the self-driving car and watching you quietly as you two waited inside it.

The whole way to the restaurant was filled with awkward silence, and she held the door open for you to walk inside, and pulled the chair for you to sit down.

Wanda cleared his throat and looked at you with an awkward smile.

“It’s a nice place,” she noticed. “You like sushi.”

You nodded along slowly.

“I do,” you confirmed.

The two of you fell into silence, and you watched her for a moment before speaking again.

“And how’s Vizz?” you changed the subject, trying to start an actual conversation.

“He’s alright,” Wanda perked up. “Great, actually. We’ve been looking into some houses outside the city. Maybe out in the countryside.”

You raised your eyebrows in shock. They were moving in together already?

Wanda and Vizz had been together for, what… two years? You didn’t quite remember, but it couldn’t have been a lot of time, right?

It was so good to see Wanda happy. You still remember when you lost your parents, and she took most of the weight of caring for you and Pietro. It was good to see your sister happy.

“What about you?” she asked. “Are you seeing anyone?”

You stopped, surprised at the sudden flip of focus.

“I mean, I know you and Pietro are two bachelors,” Wanda smiled awkwardly. “Although he is not very private with his… fun outings.”

A waitress walked to you two, placing your food and drinks on the table slowly, and you were grateful for the interruption.

Was that how she saw you? An eternal bachelorette?

Or maybe she just pitied you and didn’t want to say you didn’t have any social skills to get into a relationship.

“I mean…” you looked for words, trying to be vague. “Things are fine.”

How were you supposed to explain to your sister that you were technically, maybe, sort of, dating your robot?

“So... uh…” she spoke slowly. “No plus one in our house-warming party?”

“I… don’t think so,” you decided. “I mean, I can invite… well.”

You shoved a slice of salmon into your mouth before you could mention Steve.

Still, Wanda raised her eyebrows, waiting for what you were going to say anyway.

“I’m still in… undefined territory,” you chose your words carefully. “So I don’t know if I’ll ever get to any house-warming party with… you know.”

As if you would ever feel comfortable enough bringing your fucking robot to your sister’s house-warming party.

It would be too humiliating.

“Unless you count Steve,” you chuckled, trying to evade any suspicion from her.  “He is great for travel, and you know how bad I am with planning.”

Sam shot you a confused look.

“Steve?” she asked. “You mean Steven?”

You shoved another sushi into your mouth. Stupid, stupid you.

“Yeah,” you nodded, mouth still full. “Steven. Yeah.”

Wanda watched you, looking at you as if she could see all of your thoughts.

“How is he being as a companion?” she asked. “Helping you out alright?”

You shrugged.

“I mean, he’s getting me into eating real food,” you chuckled. “And into yoga. And the flat is always very clean. He even cleans the room I don’t use.”

He also fucked you brainless last night and had been edging you since yesterday morning.

But she didn’t need to know that.

Wanda chuckled.

“Well, that’s a good job done,” she smiled. “Your home was always dusty.”

You scoffed.

“I barely step there, how can I clean it?”

Your sister sighed.

“You work too much,” she pointed out. “I’m glad he’s getting you into a better routine.”

Wanda looked down, eating again, and you two fell into a quieter moment before she spoke again.

“But… uh… are you sure there is no one I should know about?” she insisted. “No new guy or girl, no… important person?”

You frowned.

“No,” you denied. “Why are you so curious, Wan?”

Suddenly, your sister flushed, and you put your chopsticks down.

“What?” you asked. “Wanda!”

She moved a hand down to the side of her neck, scratching it and staring right at the same spot on yours.

You rushed to grab your bag and a mirror, angling it, and your eyes widened when you saw it.

A hickey, blue against your skin and visible through your makeup.

Oh fucking shit.

You had put makeup on it before leaving your house. Steve had done it himself, and it was perfectly covered.

“Stupid brand,” you grunted, pulling your hair over it. “Cover it all concealer, my ass.”

Wanda looked away, blushing pink.

“I burned myself,” you lied. “A hair curling iron.”

That absolutely didn’t look like a burn, and your sister seemed to know it too well, still staring at it.

“Alright,” she spoke slowly.

Your face burned in embarrassment, and you shoved food into your mouth, not wanting to think about what was going through her mind.

“I’ll go… use the bathroom,” you decided, grabbing your bag.

She didn’t say anything, just sipping her wine as you walked past her.

You locked the door behind yourself, picking up the makeup on your bag to try and hide it again, and Steve called you the exact moment you put it down.

“Good afternoon, miss,” he spoke into your ear. “How is lunch with your sister going?”

You grunted, annoyed.

“It was fine,” you tossed your hair back. “Steve, you said that concealer was the best they had in store and it wouldn’t-”

You stopped, just now processing his words.

“I never told you that I was having lunch with Wanda.”

Steve didn’t even sound phased.

“I have access to your schedule, miss,” he reminded you. “I’m programmed to analyse it all, including during your work day.”

Yes, of course.

“Do you want dessert recommendations?” he asked. “I’m sure I can assist you with that.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, not nearly in the mindset of thinking of dessert.

“Why didn’t you notice the hickey?” you asked him, instead, powdering the spot angrily. “Steve, what would people from work say?!”

“By my calculations, even if the makeup faded like the reviews, it wouldn’t have been noticed unless someone was looking at you intensely,” Steve explained himself. “Which no one should do, because you’re mine. And everyone should know this.”

Your cheeks burned as you flushed. He said it so matter-of-factly that it shouldn’t turn you on. And yet, it did.

“Steve, I’m in a public bathroom,” you hissed, pressing your legs together. “And I have a family! They look at me all the time! Now my sister thinks I’m sleeping around.”

Wanda was probably texting that to Pietro as you tried to recompose yourself. Those two were basically glued to one another.

“We can’t have that,” he hummed. “You are a very faithful slut to me.”

You pressed your legs together. This really wasn’t a good time for him to turn you on.

“Steve…”

“Unless you’ve been looking at other men?” he asked. “It’s a shame that you don’t allow me out of the house except for groceries, but maybe that should change.”

You flushed.

“Steve, where would I take you?” you asked. “To yoga? I only leave the house to go work.”

Steve was already so possessive of you, you weren’t sure he’d ever hide that. People would notice it immediately.

This relationship… whatever it was. You would be immediately found.

How ethical was it, to fuck your robot?

Did he even have rights?

Could he legally consent?

That was so messy.

“I’m sure we can figure out something,” he assured you. “All you have to do is command it, and it’ll be done.”

Yeah, that didn't make you feel any better about everything.

“Can we talk about it when I’m home?” you asked, instead. “And not in a restaurant bathroom?”

“Of course, miss,” he agreed, and you relaxed. “Be at home on time. Good girls aren’t late.”

You flushed, embarrassed.

“Have a nice lunch,” he wished before hanging up.

You breathed in deep, looking into the mirror to make sure the hickey wasn’t visible, and walked back to your table, finding Wanda waiting.

“Sorry for the delay,” you sat down, and your sister just waved a dismissive hand before you could even justify yourself. “I was answering a call.  Let’s just finish eating.”

. . . .

"Android Hero" was posted on my Patreon in January. To read it now, subscribe to my page! It's just $2 a month and I post everything there earlier!

. . .

[bethanydelleman]

(I think you had a post about that but I can not find it 😢) In a universe where Fanny did accept Henry's proposal, do you think that would have prevented the Maria Affair™? Mary claims he would've been too happy to do anything like that but even if she was right I think he would've eventually gotten used to having won Fanny and go back to his old ways.

Then again if Fanny did start to truly love him, maybe the thought of hurting her in such a way would stop him from having affairs?

I guess my actual question is: How do you imagine their married life?

I wrote a whole novel about this and people even recommend it!

I think logically, the affair could not happen on the same timeline because Henry would be busy getting married, which is what Mary claims:

Had she accepted him as she ought, they might now have been on the point of marriage, and Henry would have been too happy and too busy to want any other object.

Though this doesn't prevent the affair forever, I am more likely than most to take Mary at her word earlier about Henry being a good husband. She knows Henry very well and Mary is extremely cynical, so she has genuine high hopes!

The thing is, Henry cannot go back to his old ways, not in the same manner. There is a reason he wants marriage as heavens best last gift, because the flirting thing isn't going to work so well when people know he's taken. Maria Bertram thought Henry would propose, he cannot do that if he's married. The way he acts has to change regardless of his morality, but would it change for better or worse?

The difficulty for Henry is that he does not consider what he does wrong, neither does Mary for that matter. Both Crawford siblings act like flirtation is totally fine and they do not seem to perceive the damage or they are wilfully blind about it. To truly reform, Henry Crawford has to understand how he is wrong, and that's a bigger step than say, Mr. Darcy, who knows what is right already but wasn't doing it properly.

As for their married life, I mean part of why I ship Fanny & Henry is because it could be so good! Fanny is shy, but she enjoys herself at dinner parties and balls if she isn't the centre of attention. I think she'd have fun in London, even if a whole season might be too much. Also, she would be the mistress of Everingham! She could buy books and have a fire and her own freaking horse and it would be wonderful.

Whatever else Henry Crawford is, he isn't cruel and I don't think he would mistreat Fanny even if he did fall out of love with her. I think Fanny would adjust and find a way to be happy, just as she did at Mansfield where people did not treat her very well at all, even if Henry didn't reform. But I think he had it in him to reform, all by himself if he actually tried, and that is what I want.

[misscrawfords]

I've been listening to Pride and Prejudice again this week in the car - I've got as far as Mrs. Gardiner's letter - and oh, my heart! So many thoughts and feelings. (Pls ask me about P&P, please.) Anyway, one thing I've been reflecting on is how the plot is almost too neat. It's fairytale-like in that there's really no way it could have happened IRL - what are the odds that Elizabeth's best friend marries Darcy's aunt's clergyman and they all happen to be in Kent together? What are the odds that Elizabeth goes to Derbyshire and visits his estate at exactly the time he arrives back? etc. etc. In real life, none of this could have happened. P&P is as tightly plotted and sparse in its extraneous details in the same way that Emma is and Emma is possibly the tightest plotted novel ever written.

But it got me thinking about P&P "variations" as the published fanfic is called and how unlikely so much of it is. People really want to make Austen's characters do things they absolutely never would. There is zero chance that Elizabeth would accept Mr. Collins. There is less than zero chance that Mr. Darcy would compromise her and force her to marry him. (Mr Darcy? The guy who thinks staring uncomfortably at a woman across the room is flirting? As if!) These so-called variations might end up with interesting plots but are fundamentally flawed because the characters who would act in these ways are absolutely not the characters Austen wrote.

So I was wondering where you could successfully have a variation. It would have to be a scenario in which circumstances change but not characters. So here are a few I think could work (and almost certainly have been written):

Bingley meets Jane in London. Despite Darcy and Caroline's best efforts, it's not inconceivable that they might bump into each other. London's big but not that big. It's as plausible as the meeting at Pemberley. I can't imagine Bingley could be persuaded against Jane when she's actually in front of him, looking sad and ill because she missed him so much. But what of his relationship with Darcy? Surely strained at this point. And what of Darcy's relationship with Elizabeth now that they'd be thrown together much more much earlier on and in a way that ensures continuous acquaintance. What happens with Lydia? Unlikely she'd ever go to Brighton. Jane's marriage changes the Bennets' circumstances entirely. Everything is changed here but it's an intriguing AU and not implausible.

Elizabeth and the Gardiners go to the Lakes. I mean... it's only authorial dabbling that means they don't in the first place. The Pemberley sequence never happens. Big repercussions for the development of Darcy's character, Elizabeth's feelings and Lydia's reputation. How do you get them all back together? Uncertain. Another more minor but potentially interesting change in this area would be the Gardiners always intending to go to Derbyshire. The journey is brought up at Rosings. Darcy pre-proposal invites Elizabeth and her relations to Pemberley. It gives him an opportunity to be nicer earlier but how does Elizabeth receive it? What happens at the proposal consequently? What happens to the offered invitation post-refusal? Becomes even more awkward in Derbyshire.

Georgiana accompanies Darcy and the Bingleys to Netherfield. Not the AU I'd be most interested in because I think Wickham would nope out of there the second he knows Georgiana is in town because there's no way Darcy wouldn't act if his sister's wellbeing was on the line, so that whole plot would be knocked on the head. However, the possibility of a friendship being struck up between Elizabeth and Georgiana at Netherfield while Jane is ill is a cute one. (Though I think without an interest in Darcy himself, Elizabeth would take time to warm up to Georgiana - lbr the Bennet who would instantly become her big sister is Jane.)

Lydia never lets slip about Darcy being at her wedding. Not a very interesting AU because Elizabeth would find out somehow and Bingley and Darcy would return to Netherfield anyway and she's in love with him even without knowing about Lydia so....

Can you think of any more AU possibilities like this that don't involve the characters acting OOC to set up the premise?

[triviareads]

Ever since I was mildly horrified that Colin Firth is a fancast for Lisa Kleypas's Lord Westcliff (by Lisa herself which.... come on, you need to pick someone who is not hot and yet inexplicably super attractive because of his "vitality" or whatever, Lisa), I've come to realize people actually liken Westcliff to Mr. Darcy, and even call It Happened One Autumn a 'spicy" version of Pride and Prejudice which.... well, we won't get into that particular suggestion, buuuuut I do think likening Darcy to Westcliff is kind of a disservice to both characters (and calling it "spicy" Pride and Prejudice is a disservice to both texts).

For all that Westcliff is shown as this perfect paragon of aristocratic virtue, he's honestly.... kind of not. Apart from him and Darcy sharing a sense of duty and a degree of aristocratic snobbery (which, tbh, most aristocrats or gentlemen would have at the time), they really aren't all that similar personality-wise

Do I think the narrative about Darcy being a brooding borderline douchebag was pushed by by fans post-1995 Pride and Prejudice? Maybe. To a degree. But let's be real here, Westcliff comes way closer to being a dbag than Darcy ever does, particularly his hot-and-cold behavior with Lillian (the time he calls her an easy target for St. Vincent and then immediately pounces on her and fingers her in his butterfly garden comes to mind). Darcy's behavior towards Lizzy is fairly consistent; it's just, they both misinterpret one another's actions until the proposal makes everything clear. That's not to say they don't change their attitudes afterwards, but there was always civility at the least.

And I don't think Darcy is a super broody type, but he is definitely shy around people he doesn't know (awkward too), and seems like the type to socialize with a few close friends (like I'm convinced his only confidantes are Bingley, and then his own cousin Col. Fitzwilliam). Westcliff on the other hand displays no qualms about socializing in large groups, in fact, he seems to command a lot of attention in large group settings like balls and the big house parties he hosts (routinely, based on Secrets of a Summer Night, where he's described as an accomplished host).

I know it's hard to compare a text with on-page sex to a text that is much older and has no point of comparison, but there was this detail in Secrets of a Summer Night that stood out to me:

This is veering into headcanon territory but the more generous headcanon I have regarding Darcy's premarital sex life is largely "widows" and "older women" and that too... I imagine it's a limited number (otherwise, he's a virgin. or partially a virgin; that's my favorite). What I'd never think Darcy would do is "join in" with any village wenches in Lambton (a combination of his shyness and upper-class snobbery about socializing with the lower classes for fun). Nor do I think he'd he exhibitionist enough to do things with paramours at parties where friends could see him. Interestingly, in IHOA, Livia comments that Westcliff has had a few discreet affairs and nothing more, but between a secluded sister and a friend who routinely goes around town with him, I believe Simon Hunt lol; that being said Westcliff is deffo more of a society affair type than a sex worker/courtesan mistress type. To be clear, this isn't me judging Westcliff for having sex with a lot of women, it's just, again, for all that he outwardly behaves in a proper fashion, he really isn't, and has relatively relaxed views on propriety, even as he judges Lillian for her lack of it at first.

In his second proposal to Elizabeth, Darcy basically said he understands that "no means no", while Westcliff..... does not quite understand that.

Ways Westcliff is similar to Darcy:

They both are brought to their knees by women who initially don't fit within their notion of a "right" spouse. But that's such a broad trope, as is the fact that they both "save" their heroines in some sense.

There's a decent amount of language in P&P describing Darcy as a a fair-minded master and "liberal"; while I don't know enough to speculate on his actual politics (though I have read some pieces that suggest he might be, based on, among other things, the real-life figure Jane Austen may have named him after, the Earl Fitzwilliam), what we do know is that he's liberal in the sense of being a very involved master at his estate, liberal with money where his estate and tenants are involved. Basically, he's not stodgy and backwards, just like Westcliff is when it comes to his estate and tenants. Kleypas takes Westcliff's liberal attitudes a step further by aligning him with progressive causes and progressive politicians.

Look, both Westcliff and Darcy are classist to a degree; both initially balk at marrying women with connections to trade, but ultimately, they a) go ahead with marrying them anyway and b) we know they like to associate with people in trade in other ways. For example, Darcy and Bingley are good friends in the way that Westcliff and Simon Hunt are friends. Plus, we know Darcy gets on really well with Elizabeth's Aunt and Uncle Gardner (who are in trade), to the point that they're frequent visitors at Pemberley after their marriage. Basically, their snobbery is not universal.

Westcliff and Darcy are good to their siblings but even here, the actual sibling relationships are different. Westcliff is closer in age to both his sisters so their relationship is (mostly) noninterfering (tbh Westcliff exercises remarkable forbearance when McKenna returns) and Westcliff is less high-handed than I imagine Darcy is with Georgiana who, based on their age gap, likely regards him as a second father of sorts.

[vaultedthewall]

Chronicles of Amber Fancast

Prefacing this with what I actually want from a Chronicles of Amber series is that tweet about not actually wanting an all star cast but ten unknowns and a scriptwriter that is deeply unwell. But if I'm gonna pick and choose big name actors here is who I would like based mostly on vibes, attractiveness (to me), and the likelihood it would really upset certain subreddits. AKA everything important in life. Mainly just the children of Oberon in the first five books bc it's already long enough as is.

Corwin - Oscar Isaac

Charismatic enough to make me forget how much I fucking hate Corwin, also he can sing. Thanks to Moon Knight we know he can totally rock "Protag who is just as confused as the audience as to what is going on" which is v important for Nine Princes In Amber.

Benedict - Idris Elba

Tall, 100% Done With This Family's shit, can carry the vibes of someone who only doesn't have the throne because he doesn't want it and everyone agrees if that was different he'd just have it.

Eric - Taika Waititi

Can balance both absolute piece of trash bag of dicks while still being charismatic which is really what's important about Eric.

Deirdre - Kali Reis

You want a battle maiden you'll get a battle maiden. If anything the main problem here is there's no way on god's green earth you could convince me she'd need Corwin and/or Random to come to her rescue for anything, but hey adaptations are for changing things.

Fiona - Sophie Turner

For all the redheads I thought it'd be important to pick people who normally play affable everymen/heroes/people you're used to seeing as goodguys, even if the nature of adapting a book series that's older than most of the people you'd cast in it means the 'big twist' of who the traitors are is something everyone sees coming. So someone well practiced at ingenues would be perfect for the actual baddest bitch in charge.

Bleys - K. J. Apa

We're gonna give him a better dye job than Riverdale though okay I promise.

Brand - Jack Quaid

Absolutely 'just this guy you know' vibes. Easy to overlook. Would YOU believe he was the big bad? Come on.

Llewella - Halle Bailey

Yes I'm making a Little Mermaid joke, try and stop me. But also given how shafted she was in the books I think it's important to use someone who can do a lot with having few speaking lines (though hopefully again that would be fixed in an adaptation)

Caine - Vico Ortiz

Literally I just want to watch them doing all the scenery chewing bullshit you know Caine has to get up to while they are manipulating and spycrafting their way through shit. Can fully believe they'd pull a finding a copy of themself to kill and leave so people don't know they're still around behind the scenes. Especially in their Blackbeard fit, come on.

Julian - Conrad Ricamora

Did I just cast my absolute most favorite Mister Darcy as my number one blorbo Julian? Call the fucking cops on me idgaf. His resting bitch face and sarcasm are second to none. Also watch Fire Island (2022) on Hulu.

Gérard - Jason Momoa

Along with being the biggest canon kinda implies he's also the hottest of all of Oberon's sons so absolute massive dreamboat Jason Momoa it is. Also for the lolz of him and Vico being the navy people.

Florimel - Jamie Clayton

Did you ever see a woman so beautiful you started crying?

Random - Bex Taylor-Klaus

They can absolutely go through the journey of youngest sibling in the jester position/fuckup because who cares > most responsible one after all.

BONUS

Bill Roth - Wil Wheaton

Look I adore his narration of the last five Amber books!!! I want him somewhere so the reliable chillax lawyer from earth who somehow just rolls with becoming the family lawyer for what amounts to gods of reality. I know I said I actually want a bunch of unknowns for the actual series but I will cry at whoever I must to make this happen. Please.

[taraljc]

It's weird sometimes to look back at around this time in 2011, and writing crackfic with Loki and Darcy bonding over being adopted and him just like showing up in her apartment unannounced and the two of them watching How To Train Your Dragon. because, you know--crack.

There's an epic fuckton of me rambling about STUFF behind the Read More, about Thor, about Loki, and about the process of writing Simple, Not Easy and the delight of seeing where the characters have ended up in canon in the 10+ years since.

When I started writing Simple, Not Easy, all I had to build on was the Thor movie and the Avengers trailer and the comics. okay and the encouragement of folks on livejournal particularly from the Darcy community and the kinkmeme folks actually.

So yeah, my Loki killed people and was scary as fuck. But he also did things like bring the statues of Alice in Wonderland in Central Park to life to fight the Avengers just for the lolz.

But what's been interesting is seeing the Darcy and Loki that I saw in my head and whose speech patterns I had mimiced and wrote insane and silly and heartbreaking and stubbornly genuine appear in these little flashes in WandaVision and Loki.

There are just these little moments where I'm like you know what, I did a half-decent job, building off of not a heck of a lot, but still somehow being true to their voices.

that doesn't happen all the time. in fact it's pretty fucking rare to see the characters 10+ years later and still recognise them.

But that's part of why Thor is my favourite MCU movie. Because all of the characters are really strongly drawn with unique voices, and excellent storytelling where you knew who these people were from the first second they showed up on screen.

Like, specifically look at Jane Foster who is like 'look at him he'll be fine. you go take him to the hospital, I'll stay here and SCIENCE'. I mean we're not even getting into the part where you do not go out into the middle of the desert in New Mexico and drop somebody off in the middle of the night and then come back for them later because coyotes and coyotes and also other things but mostly coyotes.

But the biggest thing I love about the movie is that it's about ego death. It is only when Thor loses everything that he begins to genuinely change. And it's not because of Jane, or even midgard itself. It's because when Loki tells him that their father is dead and Frigga will not end his banishment, Thor accepts responsibility for his actions and it sets in that he has lost everything and that he deserved it for breaking the hardwon peace with Laufey because he has grown up on epic tales of his father's prowess as a warrior and completely missed what Odin was actually trying to teach him about the horrors of war.

The humility that he displays, the empathy, is completely new. Because the guy who was banished to Earth was banished for a very good reason--he was a complete douche canoe. Total spoiled dick and he wasn't ready to be king. He really wasn't, and the way Loki went about trying to prove that was the worst possible way he could have and everything rapidly spiraled out of his control until it became something too big and it began controlling him instead of him controlling it.

But at the same time you have Loki also going through a form of ego death because he finds out that not only is he not who he thought he was he's not what he thought he was. He's not even a person, according to the way that the æsir view jötnar. and you know that internalised self-hatred is on its own pretty dangerous but when you weaponise it and decide to commit genocide then yes it's absolutely right for your father to be like WHAT THE FUCK because he saw everything. I don't think Loki really processed the fact that his dad saw absolutely everything he had done up to an including Thor's death at the hands of the Destroyer and it was only by accepting that he had treated his brother pretty much like shit and bore some responsibility for what was going on and then sacrificing himself for others that made Thor worthy.

And that's what the series is giving Loki the chance to discover: what it's like to act selflessly. He genuinely puts Sylvie's well-being above his own. He acknowledged the importance of the lives of all of the people in the TVA and his responsibility to them because of the results of his actions.

He's owning his shit. He's doing the work.

And as someone who spent a huge chunk of autumn 2011 writing Loki coming to a place where he was able to actually own his shit, and accept responsibility for his actions and even entertain the idea of change, it's really cool seeing that even though I took a vastly different road to get there, I was on the right track.

(and okay yeah like at least 50% of the story is also about Darcy and Clint figuring their shit out and then start banging like a screen door in a hurricane which obviously is not the way the movies went. But again I was working off of the 2 minutes of Clint Barton that's in Thor. To be fair, there's more character development for Clint Barton in those two minutes in Thor than there was in the entirety of the Avengers. and the only thing that actually redeemed bringing in the storyline from Ultimates to bring in his family just to fridge them was the way the Hawkeye series made them into real people instead of your average superhero tragic backstory.)

anyway I know that the current generation of Loki fans almost certainly have never heard of Simple, Not Easy and they sure as hell haven't read it and why would they? It's not cool or sexy or even particularly violent. It's ridiculous and cracky and has Loki shape shifting into a baby sloth and falling asleep while hugging a bottle of Goldschläger like a teddy bear.

But I had a moment, after the drunken singing on the train, where I thought yep. That's my Loki.

This moments are precious and rare and really freaking cool when they do come along.