#getting too old to go along to societies and stuff now

[katya-goncharov]

i'm feeling so much pressure to send a good application for the university library job i want now, just so i can escape from my supermarket job in the future

[radiance1]

Ya'll know de-aged Danny, but get ready for.....

De-aged Tucker!

So, the trio has split up as they got older, still friends, but just going on with their own lives.

Sam went on to connect more with High society and becoming well-respected, as well as running multiple charity events and a botanist on the side.

Danny went ghost hunting with his family, then when he became an adult, his parents pushed for him to go to college to pursue his dreams.

Tucker?

Well, Tucker has been doing some... stuff. If he had to say.

Said stuff involved magic, another secret government branch, wizards and tech. Suffice to say, Tucker has been leading a very busy life in the dark, he's keeping it from Sam and Danny because he doesn't want to involve then in this when they have their own lives to look after.

This government branch has nothing to do with ghosts, everything to do with magic and ancient artifacts, however. He's been tracking them down for years now, constantly hacking into many of their bases and preventing them from doing whatever they wanted to do.

Eventually, however, they managed to catch wind of him and he, well, he kinda slipped up and they caught him. Not that he couldn't get out of it, nor was it the first time it happened, but still. However, this time they found him far too dangerous to continue to exist in this world, so what did they do?

Reverse his clock and banish him to another dimension, of course!

So now here Tucker was, a 10-year-old boy with none of his usual equipment and lost in an entirely other world without any help and any variety. He only had what he had on him at the time, his clothes-that were now too big for him- a highly advanced arm bracer that he regularly wore and uses for hacking- thankfully able to fit on his arm because of the nanobots it was made from- his beret and his glasses.

Well. Fuck.

So of course, he first finds a place that he could own as a child without being put in foster care, an abandoned warehouse, perhaps? Yea that would work, just needs a little fixing up.

Of course, if there's anything to bust along the way trying to find a way home, then of course he would bust it.

[lilacgaby]

day one

~2k

chapter select!

i do not got this.

[name] could barely sleep because of her nerves. she kept replaying the worst scenarios possible in her head.

what if he rejected her in front of everyone? she'd have to leave the school from the embarrassment. she'd be trash-- the trash of society!

maybe she just needed to eat.

she crawled out of bed, put on her house slippers, and made her way down to the kitchen.

she saw a couple other early risers along the way, momo greeted her and congratulated her on her successful mission, and iida told her not to stay out past curfew.

same old, same old.

she started to make some chai to drink. "maybe momo would want some, i should make her a glass." [name] pondered out loud while preparing the tea.

she went up to give the glass to momo. "ah, thank you [name]!"

"no problem momo."

she then on her way down, eyed katsuki who was heading to the kitchen at the same time as her.

okay [name]. stay cool.

she poured herself a glass. he walked up beside her.

"yo."

"hey, you want some chai?"

"sure."

she poured him some in a glass, and he nodded appreciatively.

so far so good. she didn't even need a third wheel.

katsuki looked around as if to make sure no one else was with them, then he said...

"did you see when usui kissed misa, and jumped off the building?"

"yes! it was so cute, he really is the best."

"how did he not break his legs though? he should've broken a leg, it would've been such an easy plot point to develop. she could've taken care of him and gotten closer to him that way."

[name] thought for a second. "i mean, maybe the author thought it was too predictable though? you gotta read the next volume. what happens next is so cool!"

"no spoilers [name]."

she sighed. "it wouldn't be spoilers if you weren't such a slow reader. hurry up! it's literally pictures!"

"you didn't even finish ouran high school host club loser. don't talk to me."

"pfft. i watched the anime, who needs the manga?"

"the anime didn't even go in depth to all the arcs!"

"whatever man."

"do you even remember the characters?"

"yes i do! i'm not an idiot."

"then who's your favorite host?"

"kyoya."

"why?"

"because-" oh no. "because sometimes he reminds me of--"

"heya guys! what're you doing? flirting over here?" kirishima exclaimed. expertly cutting her off.

she really did need a third wheel. and she did need to thank kirishima and call him the manliest man in the world, because he really saved her ass.

"no, shut up shittyhair." katsuki remarked, before going off to the side to cook something.

'thank you!' [name] mouthed.

'for what?' kirishima mouthed back.

she facepalmed internally, but mouthed back, 'i'll tell you later.'

he did a signature smile, before going to pester bakugo.

she was saved, for now. she went to go get cleaned up for classes. she did her hair, a bit of makeup, ironed her clothes, and readied her bag.

now, to survive school.

✧˖*°࿐

luckily, she sat next to mina the entire day. unluckily, all the girls in the class were avid gossipers. which would've been great.. every week except this one.

normally [name] would never be nervous while gossiping. she could read others like a hawk, and if she didn't have shoes on, she could focus to an extent and feel their heart beats to confirm or deny whatever they're saying.

of course, she wasn't a bully. she'd only ever think about whether they were lying or telling the truth to herself. she just wished she could keep it to herself today.

"hey [name]." oh no.

"we all always talk about our crushes and stuff-"

stop please.

"so we gotta ask,"

mina please step up!

"we gotta ask why you're so respectful? like c'mon! live a little and talk a bit of trash about some people. there's gotta be something or someone you don't like." mina cut in, saving the day.

who knew the third wheeling would extend to people she didn't even have a crush on?

"uh, well it's not that i don't like people, it's more i don't wanna bother myself thinking about them."

"really? well, who don't you like?" damn it jirou and your good questions.

"mineta." phew, good save me!

"that's too easy of an answer, like, do you hate anyone from 1-b?" Uraraka asked.

yay another easy answer! "i don't hate anyone from 1-b."

the girls all seemed to accept it, phew, nobody ask the opposite and we're good.

"hey, but aren't we asking [name] the wrong question?" tsuyu suddenly said

no! not when i was just safe!

"oh yeah, [name]. who do you like?"

"b--"

"who's ready to learn?" present mic yelled as he jumped onto one of the desks in the front.

"get down. alright settle down and get into your seats. class is starting." mr. aizawa said, the commotion effectively covering her answer.

the girls all went to their seats.

                                     --------

the next hurdle was lunch time. piece of cake.

except for the fact that she'd always sit in between katsuki and mina.

no big deal.

everything started out normal. everyone besides bakugo did their best to not question [name] directly, as they found out only when it was directed to her that she'd be forced to answer.

bakugo was luckily never much of a talker himself, only butting in to defend himself or jokingly insult others, even though majority of his insults held no weight.

but sometimes they'd catch themselves in the middle of their sentences, and have to fix their speech before [name] would be forced to answer. the goal post was moved from not confessing to not making her answer any odd questions at all. because bakugo would definitely notice her robotic answers.

"yeah like, didn't [name] totally-- i mean uh-- didn't we all totally flunk that test?"

-

"[name] remember when we-- uh-- i mean guys remember when we snuck out that one time?"

"which time?"

-

"dude, the convenience worker totally has a crush on [name]! right [na--] uh-- everyone?"

[name] focused almost unconsciously, and she noticed that katsuki's heart beat was speeding up for some reason. huh.

-

"you idiots are acting weird today." bakugo said out of no where.

"what? pfft. no way." sero said, trying to play it off.

"you're crazy man, i mean.. we're all acting normal. it's you who's acting weird!" denki said, before laughing awkwardly.

"yeah something is definitely up. how many of you dumbasses are in on it?"

"what? bakugo you're being uh-- irrational."

"since when do you talk like that raccoon eyes?"

"uh-- since i studied?"

everyone face palmed at that.

"okay the jig is up. the fuck is going on?"

"uh.. gotta go. i'm uh-- real hungry! needa get some sun y'know? see ya!" [name] left before anyone could stop her.

mina followed after her, leaving denki, sero, and kirishima to use the collective 5 brain cells they have to try and convince bakugo that nothing was up.

she was so gonna owe them more than a dinner for this.

                                       ၄၃

[name] didn't know what lie they were gonna come up with. and to be honest, she really didn't want to find out.

as she sat on the rooftop, she let the chloroplasts out on her skin, which made her have a couple green-ish spots all over.

"eating really does help." [name] murmured.

"watching you eat is so crazy! i mean you're literally turning green!" mina said, eyes wide and wonder filled.

"...you're literally pink.. but okay."

"hey, can't we ask mr. aizawa to nullify the quirk while we're in class?"

"... mina that is the smartest thing you've ever said."

"cool! we'll need to update everyone at our daily meeting today. as long as he agrees we'll only need to worry about other times!"

"we should go now, before class starts."

"okay! you go ahead, i'm gonna go see what our other agents said to bakugo."

"agents?"

"just go!"

                                        ‧₊˚✩彡    

"um.. mr. aizawa? may i come in?"

"yes." he grumbled sleepily. he was in his sleeping bag, barely looking up at her.

"what is it [name]? is this to clear up about you being on the floor? because i really didn't care."

"uh.. no. this is about something that happened while i was on the mission."

"go on." she could tell that even though he seemed completely uninterested, that she had his full attention.

"well, you see, i was hit by a quirk. a truth telling quirk. and it's going to last for 6 more days."

"oh?"

"and.. i'd really appreciate your help. if you could nullify my quirk during just time when we're sitting in the classroom, it'd help a lot." she bowed respectfully as she made her request.

the room was silent as aizawa was seemingly thinking it over.

"sure, why not."

"thank you! i won't forget this!"

                                      ೀ

the second half of the day went by like a breeze. because mr. aizawa was cancelling her quirk, she lived her life in temporary peace for the remaining hours of the school day.

she smiled with relief, everything is going good now.

she cleared up her answer with the girls while she still could,

"guys, i don't have a crush on anyone. im just too busy."

and then she relaxed fully.

the walk to the dorms was easy, she didn't have to worry about dinner since she didn't eat, and she could always call an early night to get out of uncomfortable situations.

easy peezy.

she had no time to talk to bakugo for the rest of the day, since he had such an early bed time.

at last.. the daily meeting was here.

"alright guys! great saves today! here are the rankings for best agents. [name] would you do the honors?"

"yes. unless the honors is a person. i do not know them well enough to do them.

...

just give me the damn chalk."

mina held back a laugh while she walked up.

"okay, on the bottom we have.. denki."

"what? no way!"

"yes way! you were being way too obvious earlier! which brings me to my next loser: sero."

"no way, this is rigged."

"no it's not! what point of no questions do you not understand! anyways

next up, we have kirishima. amazing work this morning!"

kirishima bowed jokingly.

"and lastly, one for one, we have alien queen mina!"

"this is so rigged!"

"obviously she'd win, they're best friends!"

"sounds like jealously! anyways-- thank you [name]! take a seat."

[name] took a seat as mina resumed her place as the leader.

"okay agents! we have a new addition to the team: mr. aizawa!"

"what?" everyone said collectively.

"correct! i came up with the brillant idea for him to use his power on [name] during class time when we're all just sitting around. that's how i earned top spot!

so now, our sub-operation is this:

plan [name]'s perfect confession."

"what?" [name] scoffed, "that's not part of this operation!"

"and besides.. with what denki told bakubro earlier.. we can't go on with that yet."

"what the hell did you idiots tell him?!"

"we just said you were embarrassed because you have crazy woman issues and don't want anyone to question you right now!  he interpreted that however he did!" denki defended.

"hey-- i didn't say any of that. it was all you man."

"way to throw me to the wolf sero!"

"just get out! all of you!"

"meeting over guys!"

"mina what the hell?! i thought you went to make sure they didn't say anything super stupid!"

"i did! but it was too late.. see ya [n/name]!"

my life is over.

prev | next!

[codenamesazanka]

I'm thinking. I'm thinking. it would be cool if all of my dislike and criticism of Deku's actions in this final war arc (and maybe before) was actually supposed to be the intended feeling. That he was supposed to be read as an arrogant little shit with no plan and failed at saving Shigaraki all along. Saving Shigaraki was his ego talking - him wanting to save that Crying Child, because it makes him feel good to be a Hero... in the easiest way possible. He pried open Shigaraki's lid with no regard for how questionable such an act is. He never understood Shigaraki at all.

Deku has the potential to be a great hero. When Yoichi and Kudou talked about his great qualities, it was because they can sense the seed of it at his heart. But it hadn't been cultivated. He does have a drive to save, but it was too early to call it that. He does believe everyone has the same heart, but he hasn't actually come to that conclusion himself. That's why they needed to speak about his own feelings for him. He's 16 years old and thrown into a war. How can anyone have proper development and meta-cognition in such a scenario?

I'm thinking. It was Stain who spared Shigaraki and told him he sensed the seed of a warped conviction inside of him, when all readers saw at the time was an erratic manchild. But Stain was right. Shigaraki's conviction grew and developed and became such a noble desire, but 'twisted' - A Hero, but for the Villains.

Deku just had the high of his life. What if he's about to enter the lowest? He failed to save someone. Society is getting rebuilt and where it goes from now on is absolutely crucial. He's "quirkless" again - that personality is gone so who is he now?

I'm thinking. There's a reason why his agreement with Overhaul hasn't been resolved yet. I'm thinking Compress and his vigilante ancestor's dream of reform can't be just ditched like that. I'm thinking how Deku can fail so incredibly at not realizing why Shigaraki stayed the leader of the League all through the end, and how Shigaraki tells him 'ganbare'.

I'm thinking about Shigaraki, and how he's a fair guy. But he's a Villain. He sensed Deku's intention, understood just how sincere it was, and can respect that. And the guy did just helped heal his childhood trauma. And thus, he's holding Deku responsible for making sure his destruction is permanent, and leaves with a semi-sardonic 'do your best'. I think that's actually just like him.

I'm thinking about Uraraka and Shouto getting two sad looking panels in this semi-celebratory chapter where All Might calls Bakugou and Deku the greatest Heroes. They were the two who actually considered the suffering their Villain went through. They acknowledged the whole of their Villain, their agency and desires, and they supposedly saved them. But there's no celebration for them. Maybe it's because they've seen the truth and can't be unaffected.

I'm thinking about Spinner, who saved Deku from a teammate at the camp raid because he believed in Stain who believed in Deku to be a true Hero. And then Spinner became Shigaraki's most devoted friend and Shigaraki left a message to him, via Deku.

I'm thinking maybe Horikoshi got out all the battle shonen stuff they wanted out of him and now he can do his own thing. He sucks at fight scenes and great at character writing and darker material.

The issue to this thinking is that this hope is sooooo dangerous. I had a similar thought that Endeavor, after the Touya reveal, was going to get some brutal atonement. I thought post-Jaku would be a really cool chance to examine the issues of Hero Society, and that Tartarus being recognized as a human-rights violations would end up somewhere. I loved what I felt was the subtly realistic built-up of the Heteromorph arc, and I still love it, but then it ended up the way it did. I thought AFO's tragic backstory getting revealed could be awesome. I've clowned myself again and again. I guess this is the latest clowning.

And none of this actually saves Shigaraki or brings him back. Rather, his death and last words is pretty much required for this brutal realization and haunting on Deku and the story.

Worse, this all has the potential to make me think Deku is interesting. What am I doing to myself. 🤡

[redr0sewrites]

Since i saw that you are writing about ITSV/ATSV can i request something about Hobbie x F reader who has opposite life and aesthetic? They have so much in common but at the same time they are so oppositive like the reader play the piano and dress like old money girl aesthetic?

YESSSSS I LOVE THIS IDEA!!!!!

🥀Cw: none, just fluff!!!

listen, we all know Hobie isn't big on labels or commitment, but when itt comes to you? he's genuinely WHIPPED like you are HIS girl

you guys definitely have an opposite couples aesthetic, with him being so spunky and outgoing while you are much more calculating and reserved. he's great at getting you to loosen up a little, and you end up being the one keeping him in check!!

listen, the old money aesthetic is all about looking classy and refined, and Hobie is the exact opposite of that. he probably thought you were a bit snobby when he first met you, but felt bad about making assumptions once he genuinely got to know you and realized how sweet you are

Hobie probably finds your style really interesting, the same way you find his style intriguing. whenever he sees clothes that you'd like or accessories that match your style, he always buys steals them for you!!!!

once he learns you know how to play the piano??? he's SMITTEN. he seems like he'd enjoy a partner who can play an instrument, and would love to just listen in and hum along as you play. he would let you teach him how to play piano, but only if you let him teach you how to play guitar as well!!!

Hobie would give you SOOOO many song recommendations to play, and in turn he'd play some songs for you!!

your guys' music tastes definitely make an impact on eachother. you've got him listening to lana del ray and laufey, which is SO out of character for him!!! he ends up actually enjoying some of ur music taste, even though he'd never admit it. in the meantime, you're music taste has now been expanded and bands like Three Days Grace, Meatloaf, INXS, and Green Day are now in your playlists !!!

Hobie keeps you up to date on a lot of activism and stuff like that, and would def bring you to punk rallies and rock concerts even though you don't fit in at ALL. everyone knows not to mess with you tho because he always stays nearby, and his hand is practically glued to your waist all night

since you're so fem, Hobie would TOTALLY let you do his makeup!!!! if you ever need to practice, or your trying out a new lip combo or mascara, he's more than willing to be your muse !!!

Hobie is the life of the party, he's genuinely so chaotic and all ober the place, and more often than not you're the one making sure he doesn't go too far. especially if you are in the spider society, theres been a multitude of times where you've had to put a hand on his shoulder and restrain him from fucking DECKING miguel (lmao)

on the flip side, he convinces you to loosen up a little and be yourself. you don't have to be perfect all the time, and when you're around Hobie, you can always be yourself. he genuinely loves you sooo much, flaws and all

you guys are genuinely SUCH a power couple- opposites attract fr ‼️

RAHHH THIS IS SO CUTE!!!! sorry this is so short i didn't really have any full fledged scenarios in mind but PLEEEASSSEEE feel free to request more!!!! i loved this req sm hehe- ive been FIGHTING a writing slump recently urgrhrhrg

[wheresmymilliondollarman]

Hiii! I've discovered your account recently and you can definitely count me as one of your fans! Also I've never saw someone write for book bfs before so that's cool of you to do it ! I really don't know if you take requests but if u don't it's ok! but if you do can I have an Kenjix reader where she's a trained spy with no powers and Aaron send her on a mission with Kenji where she hates him at first but then she gets to know him and fall for him ? (Maybe w/o spoilers for books after ignite me)

how you get the girl

kenji kishimoto x fem!reader

you were never fond of the newest recruit, but after being assigned on a mission with him, your perspective might just change.

a/n: ty for the request!! been wanting to write for kenji, but struggled with a concept, so this is a great idea !! this is more an au thing, not based on a certain timeline in the series, so it should be spoiler free !! there also a hunger games reference in this bc i can't help myself. extra note: thank you for being so patient i had to go on n unexpected hiatus because i got sick then a bunch of stuff in my life is happening right now, so it was hard to write. but i have finally have time again somewhat and i want to get inspo to write <3

word count: 6.8k

warnings: really bad corny pick-up lines, kinda bad description of action LOL, mentions of injuries and blood, take a shot every time reader rolls her eyes

your home lied within the reestablishment for as long as you could remember. your father had stood behind the idea since it first became conceived. 

before the reestablishment came along, your family lived in the trenches of poverty. living in a one-bedroom apartment in the unsafest part of the city. most lived the same since the world was slowly deteriorating — counties went hungry, climate change affected natural resources, and the grasp of government control slipped away. it seemed like the end of the world for some, but you were too young to say for sure. 

your mother came down with an illness when you were around three. it was unsure of what it was, but it damaged her greatly and fatally. your father attempted to gather the money to see a doctor, pawning items, stealing money, and even asking the government for assistance, but it all became futile. your mother ended up passing a few months later. 

your father’s grief and rage at society drove him toward the direction of the reestablishment. they had already been around quite some time, but no one ever took it seriously - another political group with empty promises, they called it. but your father had faith in their potential, he had to, now that he wanted to ensure a better future for yourself. so, he offered his undying loyalty to the group, and they took an interest in that and offered him a low level job. 

within years, he worked his way up in power, helped enhance the reestablishment’s control over the world, and soon they were the sole government. many resisted, but the majority resided their fate to them because how much worse could the world get? 

overtime, the distant memories of the old world faded and were forgotten by many, including yourself. all you knew and lived was reestablishment life. books, movies, devices, or anything pertaining to before reestablishment life was discarded. you were too young to even remember most of those things. so, unlike others, you never felt like you missed out on anything. 

you were trained to be a soldier since practically diapers. the rebellion against the reestablishment was prominent during its early years, so your father ensured you could defend yourself properly if the worse were to come. with your agility and stealth, you were recruited to be a spy for them, infiltrating other bases and spying on the rebellion. 

your father now works closely with supreme commander anderson at the capital, but you’ve designated yourself to sector 45, along with warner. he recognized your talent the moment he met you and employed you to his sector. that was how it became your current home. 

your father was more than thrilled you impressed the commander’s son, telling you it was important to have their favor. ever since, he’d push the idea of you two, repeating that if you played your cards right, you could become the future supreme commander’s wife. 

you felt nauseous at the idea. you would never want to be a second in command helping run a country, much less marry the person who does. 

“hey! warner’s calling you into his office.” a voice called out to you. 

you snapped out of your daydream, remembering your current location. you stood in the training room, gloves on, practicing your punches onto one of the many punching bags. you tended to zone as as you got more into your workout. 

you turned around to face the soldier who had come in for the purpose of recalling a message, “thank you, tell him i will be there immediately.”  he gave a curt nod and headed out. 

you sighed, you were sure you were about to be sent on another mission to gather data. and normally, you would’ve been up for it, dying to put your skills to use. but lately, it seems the passion has disappeared. it was getting too repetitive for your liking, and you feared the rest of your life would play out the same.  

you gathered your belongings, stuffing your water bottle and gloves back into your gym bag, and replaced your sweaty black shirt with a plain gray one. 

you procrastinated as much as possible on the way to warner’s office. you are in no rush to head back out into the field or hear warners endless instructions on the mission. for once, you envied the low ranked soldiers. warner never expected much of them, so they were often overlooked and free to do as (possibly) pleased. you were expected to be no less than perfect. 

you took a deep breath before knocking on the office door. once warner granted permission, you entered the room, and the first thing you noticed was another person was already there — one you recognized to be one of warner's many men, kenji kishimoto.  

‘this is already off to a bad start,’ you told yourself. kenji was fairly new to the unit, joining a bit over a year ago. you never saw him much because of how busy you are, but due to his poor performance, warner had assigned you to train him for a week. 

it hadn’t been your first time training a soldier, so you were prepared to follow a routine and help him get the hang of basics. but you quickly learned kenji was going to be a pain in your ass.  

first, he was half an hour late to your training, wasting time you could’ve used for your own personal agenda. then, when he showed up, he acted nonchalantly about it. you decided to brush it off and just get the training over with than argue and waste more time. but as training commenced, he started acting condescending towards you. asking if you were sure what you were doing and whether you were the most qualified person to be instructing him. again, you ignored him and remained professional — trying your best to just finish off the lesson without any hassle.

the final straw for you came when you asked him to throw a punch to examine his form and offer critiques. to this responded, “are you sure about that? wouldn’t want to hurt you, sweetheart.” he said haughtily. you just about had it by then. 

in a quick movement, you threw a punch to his face, twisted his arm, and flipped him onto the mats. “sorry, did i hurt you sweetheart?” you asked in a condescendingly sweet tone. all kenji does is groan in response. 

after, you just stormed off and informed warner he would no longer be in charge of his training. you offered him no explanation and simply walked out of his office. if you hadn’t been so upset, you would’ve slapped yourself for being so careless in front of the commander's son. but fortunate to you, warner had no objections and simply tasked someone else to teach kenji.

however, that wasn’t even the end of your meeting. despite you bruising his face, kenji started to follow you like a puppy. you suddenly would run into him at least once a day. you swore he had to be somehow following you, and pretending it was a coincidence the two of you ran into each other. despite your expertise in the art of spying, you were never able to catch him in the act. you could sometimes feel a pair of eyes on you, but when you turned around, there was no one there. 

you told him many times to leave you alone, but that only seemed to intrigue him more. he went from condescending to flirting with you. you weren’t sure which one was worse. you were starting to think the latter because of his awful pickup lines.  

“do you have a name, or can i just call you mine?”

“oh god, i’m gonna throw up.”

“i’m going for a walk, would you mind holding my hand?”

“if you get your hand near me, it’s getting cut off.”

“i love it when you talk dirty to me.”

“do you travel through time? because i’ve pictured you in my future.”

“you’re not going to have a future, if you utter another word.”

“let me be the flynn rider to your rapunzel.”

“one, shut up. two, who are they?”

“what! you don’t know the amazing film that is tangled?”

“never mind, forget, i asked..”

no matter your reply, he never seems to get the hint. no, scratch that, he definitely got the hint he just simply did not care. this guy could be hit with a tank, and you were convinced he’d still have some stupid line to say to you. 

back to your current predicament, you were unsure why warner would call for kenji as well. you were hoping they were just finishing up a conversation, and you happened to be a bit early. which you kinda doubted because you had taken as long as you possibly could to get to this room.

you walked up to warner’s desk, “you called for me sir?” you questioned. the sooner you got your task, the sooner you can get away from the man next to you. 

kenji turns his attention toward you, unfortunately for you, “hey gorgeous, funny seeing you around here.” he says with a stupid smirk accompanying. 

“not really.” you spoke bluntly. 

before he can speak any more, dumb words, warner clears his throat indicating he is about to speak. “yes i did, and as you can see, i also called kishimoto here because I wanted to speak to the both of you.” 

oh no. you weren’t liking where this was going so far, especially since this is an issue needing both of your presence in the room. you prayed he wasn’t about to assign you to train with kenji again. you lucked out last time, but there is no way you would be able to again decline in a way that wouldn’t defy warner. you remained stoic and nod to his words, waiting in suspense for his instructions.  

“oh please go on, i’m intrigued.” kenji inquires. warner pays no mind him, nice to see you’re not the only one who does that. 

“the reason for that is, i am in need of both of you for a mission in favor of the reestablishment.” he explains, folding his hands together neatly on his wooden desk.  

technically, your prayer was granted; you didn’t need to train kenji. no, instead you had to go & work with him on a mission. ‘that’s why they say be careful what you wish for.’

you couldn’t protest and say absolutely not, or you just look like a child throwing a tantrum. it took a good portion of your self-control to keep that apathetic look on your face. but even then, your left eye reflexively twitched in irritation. 

“no disrespect to your order sir, but why is kishimoto needed? i can handle myself quite well if you didn’t already know.” you try to reason. 

“are you that nervous to be with me?” kenji interrupts smugly. you can’t help but stomp on his foot, even if it is a bit childish, your face neutral, not even sparring a look his way. 

kenji yelps in pain, but still remarks, “nice to see your love language has switched from verbal threats to physical violence.” 

warner, unbothered by your actions, replies, “i’m well aware of your capabilities l/n. but this task is a bit more dire than your usual requests. i’d prefer if you had a helping hand. plus, kishimoto still needs practice in the field and there’s no better example to follow than you.”

“thank you sir, for the compliment, but-“ 

“is that an objection to an order, l/n?” warner challenged you, raising a brow. you knew that was the end of it. as much as you didn’t like kenji, it wasn’t an issue worth being on warner’s bad side for. 

“no,” you stated defensively, “of course not, sir, i am ready to serve the reestablishment as needed,” you restate your loyalty, but these days it felt like empty words. 

“i, for one, have no issue with this request sir. i’m more than willingly to go along with y/n on this secret mission.” kenji proclaims with a gleeful smile. 

“great, because the both of you will be departing tomorrow morning.” warner informed, leaning back into his seat. “that will be all,” he dismissed with a wave of a hand. 

kenji and you both respectively nodded and turned your backs to walk away and exit his office. once you’re in the hall, your cool demeanor vanquishes and is replaced with a distasteful look. you simply couldn’t believe this was happening. you got partnered with the guy who you heard already had 19 demerits. surely, the world was punishing you.

opposite to you, kenji stood there with a sneaky smile, obviously enjoying how today’s events played out. it only annoyed you further. 

“well, well, well,” he begins, “i guess we’ll be spending quite a bit of time with each other. you never know how long these missions take perhaps will be stuck teach with each other for a whole month. wouldn’t that just be exciting?” kenji teases, draping an arm over your tense shoulders. 

you rolled your eyes and roughly pushed his arm off of you, “this operation is solely for professional purposes, kishimoto. we’ll be in and out then come back and relay information. then i go back to ignoring you.” you don’t bother to wait for a reply and start the walk to your living, quarters to prepare for your departure.

“i’ll grow on you eventually y/n!” he hollers at you as you venture further down the hall. 

-

you dreaded the events to come the moment you opened your eyes to woke up.

a part of you had hoped your talk with warner yesterday had been a nightmare, but as soon as you saw your packed bag on your dresser, you knew it was your reality. 

you hopped in the shower for a quick wash, braided your hair, and suited up in all black attire. you slip your bag over your shoulder and reluctantly walk out your room. from there, you made your way to the weaponry.

at the weaponry, you didn’t see kenji’s face; you had hope there was still a possibility he would not end up going along with you, and he would either be replaced, or you be left to your own devices. you started supplying weapons into your bags and filling the holsters strapped on your body. 

“can’t believe you already started without me, angel.” you hear a voice announce from behind you. 

you groaned, apparently, it was too much to ask to wish him away. he reminded you of a small insect that just refused to die no matter how many times you stepped on it with your foot. 

he doesn’t miss a beat, moving to the spot next to you, “don’t sound too excited, or else i’d start to think you like me,” kenji playfully remarks. 

you scoff, “only in your wildest dreams.”

“right you are.” you grimace at his reply. 

“can you just hurry up? the sooner we set off the better.” you urge him. 

he doesn’t deter from his smugness at your fierce attitude, “if you were so eager to be alone with me, you should’ve just told me, would’ve saved us a lot of trouble.” 

you groaned, already sick of being around him. how were you supposed to do this for a day, or even more? “you have five minutes or swear to god i’m leaving without you.” you promised on your way out. 

-

you made good of your word, and waited by the plane for approximately five minutes (you even counted down the seconds in your head). warner assigned a plane for the both of you, with its own pilot, to take you to your destination. 

you wait until the last second before you board the small plane to inform the pilot to prepare for take off. not even a minute later, you hear the movement of footsteps rushing towards the vehicle. you try to conceal your look of disappointment when you see it, kenji coming toward you.

you step down the plane to coldly greet him, “you’re lucky you made it, i was prepared to about to leave without you,” you tell kenji seriously. “i suppose i can always just push you off the plane one we take off to rid of you,” you nonchalantly suggest. 

he just laughs in response, thinking there’s no way you would actually take off without him, his laughter silences down when you offer no humor in your tone, nor your face. “you are just kidding right?”

you remain silent, and turn your back to board the plane. 

“..right?” he calls at you, a hint of worry in his tone. the corner of your lip tugs up in amusement as you walk off.

-

“wow, this spy stuff is quite boring.” kenji complains aloud. “how are you ever entertained doing this on your own? thank goodness you have me around now. perhaps we can even be some sort of duo, we can even have a cool name - the terrific two? nah. the dangerous duo? eh. oh wait, i’ve got it! mr. and mrs. smith-“

“will you shut up!” you turn your head away to snap at him. you were ready to lose your mind with his absurd commentary for the past hour.

the two of you stationed yourselves on top of a tall building’s rooftop hiding from plain view & your target’s sight. your current target was a supreme commander of another country, one that had indirectly expressed his indifference toward warner, but remained loyal to reestablishment principles. warner believes it’s possible he may have a hidden agenda concerning the reestablishment, and just to be sure, he tasked you to report his activity. 

your mission wasn’t anything complicated, the majority of it consisted of keeping vigilant watch and reporting anything of utter importance. the two of you used your binoculars to spy on the commander and his men from above. but you understood why warner had wanted someone to accompany you. there were almost 3 times as many men than what you were used to on your operations. but you weren’t going to admit this to the person next to you.

kenji nods, “you’re right we should skip the mindless comments and instead get to know each other. after all, i’d be real awkward if i didn’t even know fun facts about my future girlfriend,” he makes a hand gesture toward you at the end of his words.  

“first off, never going to be your girlfriend. second, this isn’t a date; we’re on a stakeout collecting information.” you reiterate. 

“come on,” kenji complains, “these guys have done nothing for the past 2 hours. the only criminal thing that is worth mentioning is that the commander does not pull off purple .” 

you scoffed, annoyed, but you couldn’t say he was completely lying. it has been kind of a slow night. the commander stood by his post, watching the soldiers pack shipments meant for other countries & sectors, including sector 45. whenever the supreme commander would leave, either kenji or you would tail him, but it was also a dead end. he either needed to use the bathroom or go to his office to retrieve something. a part of you was starting to wonder why warner would think of this man as suspicious when he seemed as bland as the color beige. it was quite offensive to your spy expertise to be sent on such a mundane mission.

you sigh in defeat, “fine,” you turn to face kenji, “if it gets you to shut up. what do you wanna know?”

kenji places his hand over his chest, making a face of disbelief. “wow, i’ve finally done it, i’ve cracked you. it’s only a matter of time now before you actually start enjoying my presence like most of the female population.” 

“i’m this close to pushing you off the ledge right now.” you exclaim, pinching your index and thumb very close as a demonstration. 

“well, if we’re gonna be working together,” 

he starts, ignoring your threat, “we’ve got to learn more about eachother - you know ,like the deep stuff.” 

“the deep stuff?” you repeat suspiciously. 

“yeah, like, what’s your favorite color?” 

you turn away dramatically, “well, now you’ve just crossed the line,” you say in a light tone. 

he shakes his head, “seriously, what’s your favorite color?”

“hm,” you ponder on it for a second before answering, “i like yellow.” 

“yellow?” he repeats, unsure of whether to believe you. “you’re telling me, the spy who is always seen in all black’s favorite color is yellow?” he speaks as if the concept is foreign to him.

you roll your eyes for the millionth time tonight, “i wear all black because i’m working, not by personal choice. my wardrobe is actually full of colorful choices.” you admit. 

kenji smirks, “so, what color are you wearing underne-“

“anyway,” your speak over him, cutting him off. “what’s your favorite color?” you ask to change focus. 

“purple. and not like the purple that supreme commander looks horrendous in,” you hold back a smile at the insult, “more like the shade of purple rapunzel’s dress is.”

you tilt your head, “who’s rapunzel, is she a friend of yours?” 

his eyes narrow at you, “a friend of min- she’s only one of the greatest heroines in the disney film history!” he exclaims. 

“what about your knee?”

“you can’t be serious-“

that was when you heard it, voices speaking in rushed and commanding tones, getting louder and louder to the point you were able to make out the words without your listening equipment. you recognized one of them - the supreme commander.

“shoot them!” he shouted at the soldiers. 

you’d been spotted. and now they were going to start firing. 

“kenji get down!” 

“what-“

you didn’t wait for him to understand and instinctively jumped onto kenji’s body to bring him down to the ground and avoid him from getting shot.

due to your heroic act, you were unfortunately caught by a bullet and shot in your left arm. you’ve been shot before, but it didn’t suck any less. luckily, the adrenaline coursing through you helped subdue the pain for now, but you know it’s only a matter of time before you were withering in discomfort. 

“shit!” kenji cursed in reaction to the many gunshots shooting at you both. you both are currently protected by the small four feet ledge from the building you were grounded on.

“how did they even spot us?“ kenji hollers so you could him him over the flux of bullets. 

“i don’t know, but there’s no time for explanations. this ledge won’t protect us for long we have to find a way out of here without being noticed.“ 

you had a lurking suspicion the commander was given a heads-up on the arrival of two spies. however, it wasn’t a time to investigate that. 

 kenji began to move from beneath you so he could somewhat sit himself up, still avoiding being hit. his movement caused you to unintentionally hiss in pain when he rubbed against your injured arm; that is when kenji took notice of your wound. 

he gently grabbed it for further inspection, blood oozing from the hole of the bullet plunged into your arm. returns his gaze to you. his eyes showing worry, “you’re injured. why didn’t you say anything?” he questions you gently. 

he then swiftly untucked his long sleeve shirt for machines and ripped a piece of it from the bottom. then he began to wrap it around your injury and tie it to give it pressure to lessen the bleeding. 

“didn’t think there was time, you know, with hundreds of bullets coming our way.”

kenji rolls his eyes. you speak up again before he has a chance to counter, “ok, we seriously need to focus on our plan of action right now. we are way too outnumbered to strike back.” 

kenjis nods and looks down in concentration of convincing a plan, and you do the same. you both could maneuver your way down towards the way you came in, but no doubt the commander's men have already begun to circle around the entire establishment. you both could sprint quick enough and jump onto the neighboring building, but it would require some climbing. and with your current left arm in bad shape, could be almost impossible for you to climb a building with one arm, no matter the skill acquired in your training. 

do you have to make a decision quick, so you went with the most logical one. “kenji,” you call his attention, and he looks up from his spot, “i have a plan. but..you’re going to have to go without me.” 

kenji’s face shifted from concern to confusion.  “i don’t understand..” 

you briefly explained the small plan you concocted, “with my with my injury , it’s clear i can’t do it. so, it’s better that you go on and-“

kenji doesn’t let you finish. “no. no. that’s not an option.” he protests. 

“you have t-“

his hand is covering your mouth in a second, “it’s out of the question. don’t go saying that stupid shit again, got it?“ he sternly tells you, looking you in the eye intensely. 

you’ve never had someone be so adamant about leaving you behind. if it had been anyone else with you, they would’ve up and left the moment you suggested it. a warm feeling tingled in your stomach at the thought to kenji caring about you so much. 

you’re quite stunned at his assertiveness, so you nod quietly - which is highly out of character for you.

once he knows you understand, he removes his hand from your face, sighing as he does so. “i have a way for us to get out of here unnoticed and safely,” kenji admits. you pique up, intrigued by how he has a better solution, and motion for him to continue. “but you’re really going to have to trust me for this to work, ok?” he says more like a statement than a question.

“ok.” you agree. 

while you may not have known kenji too long or even liked him much before tonight, he wasn’t incompetent, mostly, you had enough faith in him to believe he wouldn’t intentionally put you both in harm's way. 

kenji takes a deep breath in, and you can tell to ease his nerves. it bubbles up your curiosity more. it must be something quite grand for him to be nervous to do. but then again, it had to be something quite out of the box if it weren’t a plan you could’ve conceived.

“i’m going to grab your hand, and then i’m gonna need you to do your best to not freak out.” kenji instructs carefully to you. 

now you were getting anxious; what could possibly make you freak out? generally weren’t the type to scare easily, and you’re sure kenji knew this. but you truly had no other option unless you wanted to be stranded here. the sound of gunfire served over to reminder of your limited time. 

you nod in confirmation and hold out your right hand in permission for him to grab. kenji takes a second before he latches his hand into yours. 

for a moment, you’re confused. nothing seems to be happening. part of you thought he was going to continue with your plan, but forcibly drag you along with him. you turn your attention toward the other side to check if you were supposed to see something. but again, saw nothing of significance. 

you begin to scowl, “kenji is this a joke-“

but when you turn to see kenji, no one is there. right away, you assume he left you and did everything prior as some twisted joke. you were ready to get angry, but then you felt the pressure on your palm. you were still holding his hand. 

you looked around again and saw no sign of kenji besides his hand in yours. your confusion was deepening at this point, and you were beginning to think you passed out after being shot and were currently dreaming. you looked down at your interlocked hands, but you didn’t see your hands either. your eyes then moved over to your own body, but again - nothing.

you gasp, “what the hell?”

you instantly panic, not understanding what is happening. you move your body in the hope it would make it visible again, but failed. you try to free your hand from kenji’s, but he firmly keeps it gripped. 

“hey, it’s alright, i’m here. calm down.” you hear kenji finally speak from next to you. you feel his thumb rub over the top of your hand in an attempt to soothe you. 

you ignore him and attempt to make a list of possible nonsense that would explain the situation. “are we dead?” 

“no! just invisible.” he states calmly as if the whole situation were normal. he stands up, forcing you to do the same. he begins to build up a run toward the side of the building. you can’t see either of your bodies, so you do your best to keep up without tripping. 

“invisible?” you repeat, “how are we invisible?” it sounded ridiculous saying it aloud, but it was the only “reasonable” explanation for what was happening. 

“uh, let’s just say i have a certain skill set.” he says in a rushed tone. you couldn’t tell if it was because he wanted to avoid answering or focus on the task at hand. maybe both. 

“that doesn’t explain anything!” you say, waving your other arm around, although you both are unable to see it. 

now having reached the side of the building you entered from, you see the ladder that led you both up. kenji wastes no time on stepping down first. you can’t see his movement but can feel yourself being tugged and the sound of his boots hitting the metal. 

you follow, continuing to hold his hand as he leads you both down the ladder of the building. “as you mentioned over and over before, there’s no time for explanations. you just focus on getting down this ladder.” 

you did as he said (for once) and continued stepping down, with one hand on the rail, in silence. for once in your life, you were speechless.

you both successfully evaded the commander and his soldiers. the invisibility had proven to be true because you walked past them like it was nothing, as they still shot to where they assumed the two of you were still positioned. 

there were no words exchanged on the way back to the plane. kenji took the initiative to inform the pilot of your coordinates, so the two of you could be picked up. you felt foolish for being so unprofessional, but you finally evading the danger, your state of shock was brought back. 

when the plane finally landed down, kenji had finally returned both of your visible states and then released your hand. you could feel the sweat on it from holding on so long, but you were still reeling in from events to notice or care.

both of you moved to board the plane. 

if you hadn’t faced some blood loss and felt incredible fatigue, you would’ve hounded kenji for answers on your way back to sector 47. but as soon as you sat down on a seat, you were out like a light. 

-

the next time you open your eyes, all you could see was white. the ceiling lights temporarily blinded you, making it hard to see your surroundings at first. 

you groaned from disorientation and the blinding light. you turn to the sense of touch and understand you are lying on a bed. your vision settled, and you were able to vaguely recognize your surrounding. the long windows, medical supplies, other white-sheeted beds neighboring, faint smell of disinfectant — you were in the medical wing in sector 45.

you knew it was the infirmary from your sector because of the large indentation on the wall from a mishap of yours a few years prior, one of the few times you actually went to a trained nurse instead of mending to yourself. long story short, the nurses really should have de-weaponized you before attempting to wake you up after you’d passed out. 

now knowing you were in a dangerous environment, you slowly began to sit up. you used one hand to stable yourself since the other was put into a cast. the aching you were trying to put off the whole mission came in full force. 

you looked down at your attire; your first layers of clothes covered in grime and blood were removed. now you were only left in your black shorts and tank top. 

not even a moment later, you hear the sounding of the your door opening. 

“well finally you’re awake!” a voice says, “thought i’d need to wake you up with true love’s kiss.” 

kenji walks up to your bedside, his sly smile never faltering until he takes a glance at your injured arm. 

he peers down at your face. he takes a hand and moves a strand of hair behind your ear. your stomach warms at the feeling of his faint touch on the side of your face.  

“i thought i’d lost you for a second there, sleeping beauty.” kenji says in a gentle tone. 

another reference of his you didn’t understand, but you chose to focus on his other words instead.

you tilt your sore neck, which you regret,  in confusion, “what do you mean?”

“you were asleep the whole flight, and when we landed, i tried to wake you, but you wouldn’t stir. i knew something was wrong. my assumption was proven correct because when i examined your arm, your blood loss was almost severe. after that, i just rushed to get here.” kenji explains, his tone a bit somber. you fight the urge to hold his hold and comfort him, then chide yourself for thinking so something so intimate involving kenji. 

guess you probably should’ve checked your arm when you boarded the plane. somehow, your bloody arm had gone from the first to the last thing on your mind during the operation. 

“and now your facing my dashingly handsome face.” he cockily adds in. 

there it is. you don’t even snarkily counter back. for once, you just smile in response. you give in to your urges and grab onto his hand, giving it a soft squeeze, “thank you kenji. seriously, i know we started on the wrong foot, but i’m very grateful to you.” you say sincerely. 

kenji squeezes your hand in return, “to be fair, you’re the one who’s made your distaste toward me very clear while all i did was confess my undying love to you.” he corrects with a pout. he places a hand over his heart in fake pain. 

your mouth gapes, “what? you’re the one who not only showed up late, but acted like a total douche the first time we met.” 

kenji laughs at this sheepishly, “yeah, about that..” he goes to rubs his hand on the side of his neck. 

“what?” you question. “don’t leave me hanging.”

kenji laughs, “that first meeting, i wasn’t actually late.” he starts. 

you shake your head, “yes you were. i waited there for almost half an hour.” 

“i was there fifteen minutes early, waiting by the door. but then i saw you walk past me, not even sparing a glance, and go into the training room.” kenji confesses. 

“then why were you so late?” you interrupt impatiently. you don’t remember seeing him there at all, and if he had been there, why didn’t he just go in straight after you instead of wasting your time. 

“i’m getting there, angel.” kenji taps his index finger on the tip of your nose. you swat his hand and wait for him to go on. 

“after you went in, i was stunned. truly. you were the most gorgeous being i’d ever seen, and you walked around like you didn’t even know it.” 

you smack his arm at his dramatic flattery, “shut up, quit playing around and get to the point.” 

“am i one to lie?” he asks rhetorically. 

you give him a look. “alright, maybe, but it doesn’t make what i said any less true. you are beautiful, and anyone who hasn’t told you that is an idiot.” 

you scoff, turning your head away from kenji. you rather him not see the rising redness on your cheeks. 

luckily kenji continues without comment, “anyway, after i got a hold of myself, i thought, ‘how was a guy supposed to walk in and face this goddess of a person supposed to be his trainer.’ he can’t, so he does the classic guy move, ‘act indifferent to make yourself seem cooler in front of a girl.”

“so you acted like an asshole….on purpose….because you wanted to be cool in front of me?” you repeat slowly, making sure you understood his stupid plan. 

“ok, i get it; it's not my best moment. trust me when i say i realized my mistake as soon as you started kicking my ass like it was nothing. but it actually made me like you more and even turned me on a bit-“

“ok, i think i got it!” you weren’t one to be so easily flushed, but it was hard not to when he was so blunt about affection toward you. even if it was vulgar. 

“after that horrible first meeting, i had to get you to like me.” kenji explains, “so i did my best to use my attractiveness and charming persona to seduce you. but, damn, you wouldn’t even bat an eye at my attempts. that only made me wanna do it more.” 

you cross your arms over your chest, “so what, you like me because i’m pretty and a challenge for you?” you ask with an aloof tone.

“maybe at the start, but now, everything about you has me captivated. your strength and resilience. the way people undermine you, but you don’t let it stop you from proving them wrong. how to most, you’re uptight and cold, but you actually care more than you’d want to admit. i admire that you want to be the best, but not for warner, for yourself.” your eyes begin to soften at kenji as he describes you so passionately. you didn’t realize observant of you he was. 

kenji continues, “hell, even your stubbornness. though, you break my heart a little every time you reject one of my very well thought out pick up lin-“

you don’t wait to hear anymore. abruptly, you sit up and yank him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him down to your eye level. you’re moving automatically as if in a trance, and your sturdy hand reaches the right side of his face. “shut up.” you say in a rushed whisper. 

then you kiss him. you actually, willingly, lean in and collide your lips with kenji kishimoto. you like it very much too. and there is no better feeling than the way his lips on yours make your heart race and body buzz with warmth and exhilaration. 

everything happened so quick, kenji was frozen in his spot for a good moment - his eyes so wide they could’ve popped out. then, he smoothly regained composure. his face relaxed, now having a giddy grin into the kiss,  and slid a hand to the back of your neck, under your hair, to hold you closer. 

even though the kiss was a heat-of-the-moment decision, the kiss itself wasn’t heated nor rushed. no, it was almost the exact opposite. your lips were tenderly pressed together, heads titled opposite directions so you fit together in sync. 

you move your touch to his covered chest, gripping his plain fitted shirt for dear life, a way to remind yourself that this was all very real. 

you’re the first to pull away; part of you already longing for his touch as you did. you felt dizzy, not in a loss of blood way, but in a weightless feeling way. you couldn’t stop the silly smile etched on your face, nor the flushed look that was likely written all over your face. you couldn’t even find yourself caring about it. 

kenji’s appearance isn’t much different from yours, but his smile is crooked and screams more of satisfaction and a bit of cockiness. “told you i’d eventually win you over.” 

you chuckle and lightly punch kenji’s bicep, shaking your head, “tell anyone, and i’ll deny it.” you threaten in jest. 

you tap your lips with your index finger and look up in mock contemplation, “hm. maybe if you explain how you turned us invisible back there i’ll think about a date.” you remind him. you were still owed a great explanation. 

kenji grins, “is that all it takes? well, then, i’ve got a hell of a story for you.” 

special thank you to @butterflyreads for being so patient and liking my works, hope you enjoy this one <3

[thelesbianluthor]

Saw people talk about the fact that the trio knows every single threat they have to face before they have to confront them in the show vs in the books they actually fall into traps and then have to find a way to escape it.

This is one of the main issues i have too honestly. I understand the choice of making annabeth pick up on the statues and the name of the place and obviously guess "oh that is medusa". It works bc medusa is important and connected to her mother and like the context clues are staggering.

But comparing that moment to the start of episode 7 (which i actually really enjoyed especially compared to ep6) makes the show lose most of the tension they could have.

Like why make it an immediate exposition dump on "oh you are this and you do that and we are here for this and that" i don't mind the change of making the shop the entrance of hell but why can't they just for once fall into a trap like? They are 12 years old trying to avoid a war and fix a situation way bigger than them, they are smart and quick witted but let them make mistakes and NOT KNOW some things.

I feel like a lot of the potential of the first scene went out of the window and it just became a "here's an exposition of a scene that happened in the book" and that way even if you cut it you don't lose anything really.

Changes are a GOOD thing and that is not my issue with the show at all! I have already said that I mostly enjoy the changes that were made and I am not expecting nor want a scene for scene copy but it does make it a lot less interesting imo if they go into EVERY SINGLE SITUATION knowing what they are up against for no real reason.

You can have them know some things and guess who they are up against but like if it happens every time the tension of the danger gets lost a lot and it becomes repetitive imo.

On the good side of things tho I think you can see in general that the trio has gotten a lot more comfortable in the characters and the improvement it's very visible. I already said how I really love the casting and I only expect them to get better at portraying the characters that is a no brainer.

The flash backs were probably my favorite part of the episode along with the way they decided to visually represent Hell.

I love that we get to see a peak of Sally and Poseidon's dynamic and how hard it was for Sally to raise Percy, not only bc of the risks his godly heritage brings but also bc she was a single mother and society in general tends to give up on people that don't fit the mold.

Small Percy thinking his mom wanted to get rid of him and saying "I would never do that to you" even tho she has spent every moment doing her best to protect him vs an older Percy having to choose to leave his mom behind so he can do the right thing even tho everything he has done has been fueled by the desire to save her. That was beautiful and tragic.

Casting in general is incredible bc even with the little we saw of Poseidon (I knew the actor from black sails so I knew he would be great) I think he really nailed it.

Hades is maybe a BIT too silly but I can live with it honestly. Like we'll have time to explore and make other characters deeper later on so i don't see this as an issue.

The decision to make them aware of Kronos and tell Hades is interesting and I do like that he offered to protect Percy if he believed to be at risk.

I understand that with how things are now you never know if a show will be renewed and if you'll get to actually finish your story so I don't mind them making certain stuff known sooner and sprinkling references to future events or call backs (MOA percabeth reference I am talking abt you).

Overall I think that the strongest suit of the show right now is the cast and the way they show characters dynamics and their potential.

Like I have said before my criticism stems from my love for the material and my wish for it to do well. I have opinions that maybe will not match with others and it's okay! Not everyone has to like something! I WANT the show to keep going and grow and evolve into a better adaptation with each step because I really love the basis they laid down, the story and the characters and I see the potential most of all. I can't wait for the last episode.

[clumsiestgiantess]

Survivors — people barely a foot tall who were forced to take refuge in our world — have become a normal part of society. Unfortunately.. it’s not in the way they were hoping.

(original story here)

There’s no way I lost my 90 dollar ball.  Are you kidding me?!  I spent months saving up for that thing; how could I lose it?  I’d torn up my bedroom in search of my prized possession: a professional-grade soccer ball.  It had come with me to every practice session since the day I bought it.  I stormed out of my room, heading towards the garage.  Maybe I’d left it with my gear.  

“Woah!  Where are you headed so grouchily?”  My older sister asked snidely as I stormed past her in the hall.  “You wouldn’t care,” I huffed.  She shrugged offhandedly, “That’s probably true.”  Digging out all of my equipment — even my old stuff that I knew couldn’t possibly have my ball in it — I still couldn’t find it.  Ohh wait…  One of my friends had shown up halfway through practicing at a nearby park.  He’d dragged me away to a local store because one of our favorite games was on sale.  Dang it, I left it there, didn’t I?

“If Mom gets home early, tell her I’m at the park!” I yelled through the doorway.  “Why are you going to the-?”  The door fell closed on my sister’s voice and I rushed to my bike.  The park wasn’t too far from my house; I could be there in 15 minutes if I hurried.  

“Hold it.”  Julie stopped me as I wheeled it to the garage door. “Mom told me to keep an eye on you today.  Where are you going again?”  “The park,” I responded innocently.  “For?”  “I think I left my soccer ball there.”  “Oh?  The survivors have probably taken it by now.”  I sighed at her joke.  Ever since the little human-like creatures had stolen the phone right out of her purse while she was distracted — true story — she was constantly referencing it.  At first it was out of spite, then it became a habit.  “Come on, I’ll drive you.  It won’t be long, right?”  I shook my head, grateful for the lift.  

As I rode along with Julie, I begged the universe for things to work out in my favor.  Please let it still be there.  Don’t let someone take it.  By the time we reached the park entrance, my anxiety was calmed.  I could see the white spot of my ball towards the end of the field.  “Yes,” I cheered quietly as my sister pulled into a space.  “Alright, go get it,” my sister nodded.

I stepped out of the car and ran across the field in a half-jog-half-walk.  But I stopped as I got closer — staring in open-mouthed horror.  My ball was lopsided; punctured toothmark holes of a large dog pierced the sides.  “Are you kidding me?!  At least if somebody took it I wouldn’t have known they’d done this!”  Angrily, I ran up the last few feet and kicked the deflated ball as hard as I could.  It sailed across the field and hit the fence as a startled yelp reached my ears.  Below me, a survivor was hunched over on the ground, looking around in fearful confusion.  He gasped, scanning the sky above him intently.  

“Huh?  What are you-?  Oh.”  Following his gaze up to the sky, I watched a hawk or some other large bird circle around overhead.  “Are you hiding from that bird?”  The survivor glanced fearfully at me, then back up at the sky, whispering something I couldn’t understand.  “Right,” I sighed, “You have your own language.”  

The survivor was.. different than the ones I’d seen — maybe because they looked to be about my age, or maybe because they were actually alive and well rather than the few depressed half-dead ones I’d seen before.  Whatever the case, I didn’t feel like leaving them there to get picked off. 

I went to go collect my ball so the survivor would have cover again, but he yelped and rushed after me, cowering under my shadow.  His gaze finally tore away from the sky and landed on me.  Eyes wide, he asked me something I didn’t understand, but I could guess.  

I sighed, but nodded.  “Come on,” I gestured for him to follow me, and began walking back the way I’d come.  The survivor sprinted after me.  Halfway across the field, he wheezed something that vaguely sounded like he was asking me to stop.  Oh man, even when I’m walking I’m going too fast for him.  Poor guy.  I stopped and let the little guy catch up with me.  He sat down on the grass, out of breath.  However, that bird noticed we’d stopped moving.  I watched as it swooped down and landed on the telephone wires beside the field.

“Dnimreven!  M’i enif!  S’tel tsuj teg tuo fo ereh!” the survivor gasped, scrambling to his feet.  He walked on and I kept up with his pace, walking beside him at whatever speed he wanted.  It was slow going, but when we reached the parking lot, he stopped.  “I.. hhu.. t’ndid yllaer kniht siht raf daeha.”  Glancing around the lot, he looked over at the bird, then glanced up at me.  “What?” I asked, “It’s alright, I’ll follow you.  Just go back to the woods or something.”  I waved a hand at the woods, but he slowly shook his head.  “You.. no?  Don’t you live there?”  He just pointed at the bird and shook his head.  I squatted on the ground beside him.  Still he was shorter than me, but not by nearly as much as when I stood.

“Hey, it’s alright!  Just go hide in the woods for a while.  That bird will have to stop following you eventually.”  A car horn startled both of us just as the survivor was about to speak.  “Hey!” Julie called, “What are you doing?  I thought you said you’d be quick!  Stop pestering that little survivor and get in the car!”  “Alright!” I shouted annoyedly back, standing up again.  “I’m coming!  One second!”  I started walking to the trees nearby and the survivor raced after me.  When I got to the edge of the parking lot, I stopped and pointed towards the forest.  “Go on.  I’m sure some other survivors will come along and help you.”

But would they?  He gave me a solemn look and trudged towards the underbrush like I was exiling him.  The car horn startled him again and he ducked away into the foliage.  “Ok!  Ok!  I’m coming!”  The whole drive home I was, according to my sister, ‘unnaturally quiet’.  I blamed it on my popped ball — and normally that would make me angry — but I was just too caught up thinking about that survivor.  I tried to remember every time I’d ever seen one.  Surely one of them looked like they were doing ok, didn’t they?

Yet, as much as I wracked my brain, I couldn’t think of a time when I’d seen one happy.  They always looked scared.  At best they seemed kinda.. out of it.  At worst they were, well, dead.  I hope that survivor doesn’t end up like them.  He was my age.  Surely he’ll survive better than the older ones, right?  But there was that bird…  I was up the whole night coming up with a plan to sneak out of the house and return to the park.  I had to go find him again — to make sure he was safe.  

I’d never actually interacted with a survivor before.  It wasn’t at all what I expected.  My friends said they were little scavengers who liked to steal.  All the articles about them said they were a kind of mimic of us from a whole other mimic of our world.  But everyone made them sound like little animals.  The guy I met today — he seemed so familiar in a weird way.  He spoke to me, gestured for me to understand, and even his expressions were so human I could understand him just by reading them.  Then again.. maybe he was just a really good mimic.

During lunch the next day, I passively mentioned going to hang out with some friends at the soccer field, and was thankfully met with little opposition.  My mom reminded me to wear a helmet when I went out, but that was all.  I wrapped up half a grilled cheese I made for myself, tossed it into my bike basket, and pedaled off.  I think I beat my previous record of biking to the park by a few minutes, that’s how anxious I was.  I scanned the sky as I arrived.  No predatory birds in sight.  

Stepping over to the place where I left the survivor the other day, I made my way into the woods.  I searched the ground with every step until I came across a survivor laying on the ground.  A sickening feeling lurched in my stomach watching flies buzzing around them, landing on unmoving limbs.  Shit...  I’m too late.  I carefully stepped over to the body and knelt beside it.  I turned away after only a moment, but as I went to cover it with dirt, I realized their hair was much too long to be the survivor I saw before.  Holding my breath, I bent down to get a better look.

Firstly, their chest had been torn wide open, and their arms and legs picked clean down to the bone.  The position they were in looked painful, as if they’d been struggling.  I realized in my examination that the survivor was a female, and let out a relieved breath.  Whatever had caught it.. caught her — had eaten her.  Wait.  I shouldn’t be relieved by that!  What the hell am I thinking!?  I was just glad that it wasn’t my little friend who’d died, but I felt extremely guilty about thinking of this survivor’s death in that way.  She’d died likely being hunted — eaten.  Was she still conscious during all of it, or had the animal killed her by then?  I just hope I’m not too late to help the other survivor.

Gently taking a few handfuls of dirt, I covered the little corpse.  With a quick glance around myself, I spotted some wildflowers, picked one, and laid it carefully on the small mound.  “I would’ve helped you too,” I said softly, as if that were any consolation for how horribly they’d died.  No wonder the guy I’d met yesterday had given me such a desperate look when I sent him out here.  I was basically sentencing him to a horrific struggle for survival in a place where he wasn’t meant to live in.

Standing back up, I backed away from the little grave and headed in a different direction.  “Hello?” I called, “Survivor dude I met yesterday?  I’m sorry I don’t.. know your name.  And I’m really sorry I left you alone out here!  Please be alright...”  I walked through the forest along the outskirts of the soccer field, watching my every step and calling out once and a while.  I began giving up hope as I rounded the end of the field, but something stopped me before I could turn around: my popped soccer ball.  It wasn’t left where I’d kicked it earlier.  It was tucked beside a tree a little ways past the wooden fence that separated most of the park from the overgrown trees and whatnot that I’d been trekking through.

Heart pounding, I raced over to the ball and yanked it away from the tree.  A fearful yelp came from beneath it as the survivor from the day before huddled up against the side of the tree with his arms over his head.  “Hey!  Hey, it’s alright!  It’s me!  Remember me from yesterday?” I asked excitedly.  The little guy looked up at me with a bewildered expression before his face slowly fell into shock — recognizing me.  “Tahw?  S’tahw gniog no?  Tnaig edud, t’nod llet em er’uoy ereh rof ruoy llab niaga…”  I had no clue what he said, but I was too relieved to even listen.  He was alive — still using my ball for shelter.  “Oh, here!  I brought you something.”  Digging into my pocket, I pulled out the bag of my half a grilled cheese and took it out.  

“I wasn’t sure if you had anything to eat out here, so I brought you this.  It.. might actually be a bit too big for you.”  Laughing slightly, I handed the piece of sandwich off to him.  It was half his height, but he took it eagerly.  I sat down lightly, keeping watch for anything that might hurt him as he chowed down.  “Yeh tnaig?”  The survivor startled me from surveillance.  “Hmm?  What’s wrong little guy?”  He pointed to his throat, then cupped his hands and pretended to drink.  “Oh!  You’re thirsty?  I have some water, but it’s back with my bike.  Sorry, I should’ve brought it.”  The survivor gave me a confused look.  He didn’t understand me.  I knew he couldn’t, but I kept forgetting.  He looked so normal that I expected him to speak a language I knew.

“Come on,” I gestured for him to follow me like I had the day before.  He promptly got up and headed after me.  The pace was even slower than yesterday.  In the field, the little survivor could easily keep walking all the way across, albeit his steps were much shorter than mine.  Here in the uncut forest, he had to weave and duck through the foliage like it was a jungle.  He was exhausted after only a short time, and made the same gestures for a drink again, as if I hadn’t understood him the first time.  I wanted to go and bring him one, but that body I’d found had me scared.  What if I left him and something attacked?  I’d feel awful if I came back to find a similar scene to the first survivor.

I.. I can try taking him there myself.  But is he going to run away from me if I do that?  Wild animals generally don’t like being held.  But he wasn’t some wild animal.  Surely he was smart enough to understand that I was helping him.  Taking a knee, I slowly reached for him.  “I’m just gonna help you out, ok little guy?”  The survivor backed away from my hand uncertainly, but he didn’t run.  “I'm just taking you to get a drink, like you wanted,” I told him, pointing towards the edge of the woods and the parking lot.  

The survivor glanced between me and the distance he had to travel several times, then eventually glanced down at my hesitating hand.  I came closer again and he held his hands up slightly, squeezing his eyes shut.  However, he stood perfectly still. 

His reaction hurt slightly.  Doesn’t he know I won’t attack him?  He looks scared of me, but I’m not a predator.  I’m a person; I wouldn’t eat him or kill him for no reason.  Slowly, I gripped his torso in a light fist and lifted him into the air.  He yelled — dangling legs instantly pulling in against himself as he rushed to grip my fingers.  The survivor’s eyes were wide open now, looking around himself fearfully.  

“Hey, come on, really?” I asked, causing his head to whip back around towards me.  His breathing picked up against the palm of my hand.  “Is it really that scary?”  Apparently it was.  He readjusted, trying to cling even tighter to my fingers.  I sighed, “Man, you’re like.. the same age as me!  Can’t you tell that I’m not some big scary animal?”  I headed back to my bike with him in my hand. He struggled so much I nearly dropped him accidentally.  It wasn’t violent struggling like he was in danger, but still.  

Finally, I reached my bike and released him on the asphalt.  He scrambled backwards and tripped over his own feet, glancing around at the sky before taking a few steps closer to the bike, shying away from the open space.  “It’s alright," I assured him, taking out my water bottle and pouring him a capful.  “I’ll shoo away anything that tries to get you.”  “I- I t’nod tnaw ot eb tuo ereh,” he said nervously, ducking closer to the bike’s wheel until he was pressed against it.  Tsuj- t’nac uoy ekat eht retaw revo ot eht sterof daetsni?  Stnaig t’nod yllausu ekil em gnignah dnuora ni eht nepo, dna eht sdrib ekil ti a elttil oot hcum.”

I chuckled and shook my head.  “I have no clue what you’re saying, but you sure are talking.  Here, have some water.”  I handed him the bottle cap filled with water, but he only pointed to the woods.  I didn’t move until he begrudgingly took it.  Sitting on the curb beside my bike, I watched the little survivor.  A few dogs passed by on the opposite side of the lot.  Both of us eyed them warily, but they were well-behaved pets.  They ignored us and continued on after their owners.  

Wait.. pet.  I glanced down at the survivor.  He’d relaxed a bit once the dogs passed us, but he was still on alert.  I’d been thinking about that body — the poor survivor who could do nothing to save themselves from such an awful death.  “Hey little guy?  What do you think of becoming my pet?  Some people keep survivors and train them, you know.  You’d be a lot safer with me!  I’d have to hide you from my family, though,” I grumbled.  “Maybe I can make you a little home in my backyard or something.  What do you think?”  He just gave me a blank, confused look.  “Right…” I sighed, “Before I teach you any tricks I think I’m gonna have to teach you some words first.  At least you understand gestures.”

The only thing my musings were met with was a small gesture for more water.  I thought for a moment as I refilled the survivor’s bottle cap.  “I guess I should start with a name.  Hmmm.. should I give you a human name or more of a pet name?”  I thought for a moment, “What if I name you Bandit?  Because you took my soccer ball?  My sister did warn me that your kind likes to steal things.”

Once Bandit was done with his drink, I stood up decisively.  He startled, but calmed down soon after.  That was until I reached for him again.  Bandit dodged away from my grasp and stepped away from my bike.  Pointing towards the woods, he told me something and started walking in that direction.  “No, look!  I’m going to give you a real home now!  Your name’s gonna be Bandit and I’ll take care of you.  You don’t have to fight to survive out here anymore.”  I stepped over to him and tried to pick him up again, but he took off at a run — surprisingly fast for something so small.  Thankfully, it only took a little jog to catch up with him and corner Bandit with my hands.

The survivor began yelling as I stood back up.  His legs were pinned in one hand and his torso in the other.  “Tahw eht lleh?!  Tahw era uoy gniod htiw em?!  Tup em nwod!  I t’nod tnwa uoy ot yrrac em dnuora; I nac klaw tsuj enif!”  He sounded angry, but he just didn’t understand.  He probably thought I was taking him back to that sad little spot I’d found him tucked up in.  “Man, you gotta calm down!” I told him surprisedly, “You’re yelling like I’m going to murder you or something.  I’m literally saving your life!”

As gently as I could with all his struggling, I placed Bandit into my bike basket and hopped on.  He peered over the edge for a moment, confused.  However, he gasped and ducked down inside as I lifted the kickstand.  “Yeh!  I- I thguoht ew erew sdneirf!  Erehw era uoy gnikat em?”  “That’s right,” I said softer than before, “I’m getting you out of here.  Now hold on tight!  We’ll be at my house before you know it!”

I biked slowly through the parking lot and across the road, but once I hit the bike trail, I took off — excited to bring home my new pet.  Bandit yelled a few more times, and I slowed down each time.  However, I kept forgetting and speeding back up again.  About two-thirds of the way there, my little pet finally had enough.  While I was focused on a blind turn up ahead, the little thing lept out of the basket.  A heartstopping thwack resounded off the dirt path as he hit it.  I came to a screeching halt a few feet further and dropped my bike to the ground, rushing to his side.  

Blood had begun pooling through his pant leg as he hastily scrambled to his feet before immediately falling back over again.  “Bandit!  Holy shit!  Why’d you do that?!  I thought survivors were smart enough to know not to jump out of a moving vehicle!”  An agonizing cry stopped me from scolding him any longer.  “Shit, I..  I gotta get you home and bandage that up.”  Scooping him up in my arms, I drove the rest of the way single-handedly — Bandit gasping and whining the whole way back.  The sound made me sick.  I don’t understand!  He knew it was moving!  They’re supposed to be the second smartest creatures in the world besides humans!

I drove straight into the backyard when I got home, rushing for the back door.  However, when I threw it open, my sister stood in the doorway, arms crossed.  I had quick enough reflexes to hide Bandit behind my back, but that was all.  “I knew you were up to something when Mom told me where you were going!” she accused.  “No!” I yelped, covering up a groan from my little injured pet.  “I was at the park!  I swear!”  “So why are you sneaking in the back-”  Julie’s face paled mid-sentence.  “Ritchie?  Is that blood on your sweatshirt?”  Shit.  It was.  Bandit’s leg must’ve bled into my clothing while I was holding him tucked against my chest.

There was no use trying to lie.  Julie was a veterinary major — specializing in surgery.  She knew blood when she saw it.  “I- I can explain.”  Before I could explain anything, she grabbed my arm and fearfully yanked it out from behind me.  Bandit cried out in pain as he was jerked forward.  Protectively, I tucked him back against myself as my shocked sister let go of me.  “I knew you would go back for that survivor,” she said under her breath.  “But what the hell did you do?”

“I- I didn’t do anything!  He jumped out of my bike while I was riding it and-”  “Give him to me.”  “What?  No!  What are you going to do with him?”  She held out her cupped hands, “What do you think I’m going to do with him?  I have to stop him from bleeding like that or he will die.  Please, just let me have him.”  “I- It’s not that bad!” I lied, backing away, “This stain isn’t even that big!”  “It is to him.”  Julie’s voice suddenly turned hostily serious.  Hesitantly, I tried to give Bandit to her, but he gasped and tried to avoid her hands.

I was about to tell her that I should just bring him wherever she wanted him, but Julie spoke first.  “S’ti thgirla; I t’now truh uoy.  M’i ereh ot pleh uoy.”  I blinked, dumbstruck.  Even Bandit stopped struggling.  “Did.. you just speak survivor language?” I gawked.  Less than a second later, Bandit practically flung himself out of my grasp and into Julie’s arms.  He started speaking so quickly, even she gave him a confused look.  “Tsuj gnah ni ereht,” she said gently, “Ll’i teg uoy dexif pu.”  She rushed off into the bathroom.  The rumbling of medicine bins filled the air along with the sound of rushing water.  I was so stunned I stood in the doorway for several minutes before quickly closing the back door and rushing after my sister.

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

Hey Slug! Now that all snippets are out, what are your thoughts so far on the BB songs for the 3rd DRB? I'm especially excited for Ichiro's. It reminds me of Hiphoppia but with less intense dream vision feel and more funky back alley hip hop stuff. Jiro's sounds good too tho!

I love anon asks like this that remind me to go look at the new stuff that comes out... I would never think to do it otherwise. Thank you; it's very sweet of you.

Let's fire up the old YouTube and give them a listen.

Ichirou -- H歴維新 / The H Age Revolution

(Side note about the title: I'm using "revolution" here in a general sense, but this specific wording is evocative of the Meiji Restoration, the political revolution in the late 1800s that ended the regime of the Tokugawa shoguns and "restored" the old social order under the emperor while radically transforming Japanese society as a whole. Here, we should understand that Ichirou is tearing down Chuuouku's reign to usher in a new state of society.)

(Fifteen seconds in) YOOO this goes hard. I like this beat and the vaguely military-esque theme w/ the horns.

(At end of preview) DAMN okay. Give me a sec to get my thoughts in order.

Every time I see the language in these songs, I'm reminded of a video of an NHK presenter guy reading the lyrics of one song and announcing dryly, "They're all very good at kanji."

I love how this is much punchier than Break the Wall. Ichirou seems to be much more of an active agent in it, not just the figurehead leader of a revolution--and I LOVE that. It's great to see Ichirou embracing his individuality and not simply playing into the image of MC BB that others want him to be.

I also love all the callbacks to previous songs, quite literally going back to basics. ペンは剣より偽りがない ("The pen is mightier than the sword, and that's a fact!") goes all the way back to Hypmic's very first song's ペンは剣よりヒプノシスマイク ("The Hypnosis Mic is mightier than the sword")

Can't wait to get the full version and learn the lyrics. Seems like a hella fun song to rap.

Jirou -- Sunshine

(Five seconds in) Getting "This Means War" vibes.

(Fifteen seconds in) Bro what is this autotune... This sounds like the opening of Rhyme Anima season 2.

(Forty-five seconds in) "I'm ready; the wind's pushing me along; I'm flying with the wings Ikebukuro's given me" Hell YES Jirou you get that identity independent of Ichirou

(Fifty seconds in) "I can't shake the past. I take my scars with me off into a future--a future that's still unknown." Yo this is bars. (I'm butchering its lyricism but whatever) I love that Jirou is actually acknowledging his past and his struggles instead of pushing it away. You notice how his comments on the past are always either "Ichirou was so cool" or "Saburou used to be such a cute kid; what happened?" ? It's good to see him finally being honest enough to touch on his hurt feelings.

(End) Hmm... I don't know how I feel about this one at first liston. I really like Jirou's voice actor's singing voice, so I'm kinda not feeling the autotune. On the other hand, his singing voice definitely has more of a sweet/young flavor, and I can see the authors wanting to lean away from that to make him sound more adult. I think my issue is this song sounds... idk, a bit too idol pop rock to my tastes. I don't mean that idol pop rock is a bad thing; it's simply not my personal preference.

Here's a selection of people in the comments having a normal one:

"Wtf he's hot now"

"I'm picturing Jirou going to school the day after this song drops and his friends being like 'EYYY' and he's like 'Aw, you listened to it? Thanks, guys!' Then a bunch of girls swarm him and he deadass has no idea what they're on about it"

"Say it isn't so... Not my sweet baby boy dumbass Jirou... They made him hot af..."

"I feel like a mom watching my widdle Jiro-chan grow up"

Saburou -- 朱夏 / Maturity

(Side note about the title: Japanese borrows some terms for stages of life from ye olde Chinese (<- very technical term) wherein stages of life correspond to colors and seasons. You may know the word "seishun" (blue spring) or have seen blue = youth as a recurring piece of imagery in Japanese media. (BSD's Blue Period, anyone?) "Shuka" (red summer) is the stage that encompasses most of adulthood; it's the summer or prime of a person's life. The word conveys a sense of energy and a greater understanding of the world than in the youthful seishun period. Sounds like the Hypmic authors want to convey that our baby boy is growing up! *sobs into a hankie*)

(Five seconds in) Chill lofi hip-hop beats for studying

(End) Hmm... Musically, I liked the piano as a consistent piece of imagery for Saburou. It was a little too chill for me, but I always say this and always warm up to Hypmic songs over time lol.

Lyrically, I kept thinking throughout the video "This would be easy to translate" because Saburou monologues for most of it haha. Apart from the imagery related to seasons and the BB's heat/energy "firing" him up to reach the hot summer of adulthood, most of the song is surprisingly literal and straightforward. Saburou states in plain terms that he wants to go be his own person (seems to be the running theme of this album), but it's a departure from his usual style of complex imagery and vocabulary. I would guess that's on purpose, as the song opens with "All through my childhood, I could never wait to grow up. I'm a better rapper than Ichirou, but no one ever sees me as anything but an accessory to him. At least I'm better than Jirou in every way-- oh, who am I kidding? Look at me going on like an edgy middle schooler. I'm always smart, collected, calm--but on the inside, I'm NOT okay!" That is, Saburou is purposefully throwing away his attempts to look smart and mature for his age. He's allowing himself to be rough and emotional like any fourteen year old.

Really fun start to an album; can't wait to hear all the songs! Thanks again for sending this ask, anon.

[spotsupstuff]

can i have a summary of your AU? it seems like something different and ORIGINAL for once, focusing on the benefactors and not demonizing them to hell and back like everybody else does

Philosophy Sessions gets its name from an idea for a comic of Moon (while Survivor is still visiting) addressing her relationship with the Anemons (the "Ancients"' species name here) and her own faults like tolerating harm for too long. By herself, she comes to the conclusion that though the relationship/s she had with them were once good, they eventually became rotten and bad for her. She has a session philosophising about it all.

The AU's happenings keep the theme.

The main things happen in a different Iterator group (The Children of Eo/group Epsilon) from the one in-game (Wish for Tomorrow/group Tau, though sometimes it'll be nice for them to pop up and I'm not against making something for them from time to time either), during the time the Anemons still lived. Through characters, I aim to explore the spiritual/religious, philosophical, psychological and sociological aspects of their world.

It's meant to be more of a think-piece than a story, tool for exploration the complexities of anger, sex, attachment, relationship with being alive at all and coping with being terribly hurt.

Currently I mainly work on the worldbuilding through info posts so I have a solid ground to put these softer things on, along with some goofing off with the characters since knowing them is vital for these themes.

If served in a story format, I divide it into four "books": • The Polar War • Biography of a Sparrow • The Ending Chime • Transfiguration

The Polar War is about a war confict between group Epsilon and a group north from them, Rho/Frost's Promise.

It revolves around a "society" vs "society", the reason for the conflict is unclear, the main questions are ,,Why and how can a society preaching these spiritual values get into a war? How far are they willing to go?" with secondary questions of ,,How would the Iterators do in a large violent situation? How would a war conflict work for this world where death is... not really a thing?"

Biography of a Sparrow is about a low karma Anemon in the golden age, from the low castes, Three Sparrows on a Wire. This is the oldest part conceptualized, most developed, with Sparrows being my first Anemon character.

She lands herself a spot in a school for Iterator mechanics, an incredibly demanding job that ends up misplacing her into the high caste. She's also very bad at the spiritual things, the job puts a strain on her relationships with family and her priorities, her Iterator charge falls in love with her complicating things tremendously and her past lives are rather dark, loud in her dreams.

The goal is exploration of the Anemons' social structures and the spiritual concepts as she eventually begins confronting her faults and learning better.

The Ending Chime has a 16 year old high karma Anemon boy, real name secret for now and nicknamed Preacher, for protagonist.

The story takes place during the last months of the Anemons' existence. Preacher is faithful to the spirituality, but despises the religion that has gone corrupt. He was sold to the religious command of the community as a toddler in exchange for his parents being pardoned for having sex with a resulting accidental child. The caretakers, with an actual preacher as a sort of leader, have mistreated him and other given up children. The broken tooth and lip scar he has are from a bad slap from the preacher for questioning the religion when he was 10. That kind of stuff.

During one night of doubt and resentment on the kid's part, Théta, the highest yet forgotten god, contacts him and supports his decision to run away to join a rebelion against all of this. During his journeys we get to know how the society has changed since Sparrows, we get to see spiritual creatures, old corrupt gods and echoes of the past, while also getting to meet more Iterators and getting some lessons from them.

We all already know that Preacher won't get to win, though.

Transfiguration is about Théta stepping down into physical existence as the Saint to free the Iterators from their suffering, specifically about those in group Epsilon. Here, he is joined by the Iterator Biting Notos who lives more as an overseer at this point than the whole bio-computer thing.

They travel together, discussing the ages past, Notos' regrets and conflictions about helping the Saint do its quest and listening to the dying Iterators' last thoughts, last philosophy sessions.

[cathchicken]

Little guide on the celestial being races in my ToH AU

MESSENGERS:

The Messengers are considered the lowest class of celestial being. They do not possess a physical form, and are only capable of interacting with the two realms through the mirror realm. They are very knowledgeable, and are considered the scholars of the celestial realm. They thrive off of obtaining new information and being able to spread it around the realm, hence their name “Messanger”. They are very bird-like in appearance. Compared to the other races, they are on the best terms with the Collectors (which isn’t saying much), thanks to their shared interest in preserving knowledge.

ROYALS:

Royals, contrary to their name, do not partake in a monarchy whatsoever. The origin of their title isn’t known by any others besides the Collectors (who refuse to share that information), but many speculate it is because of the scarcity and fantasticalness of the race itself. Royals embrace both tradition and change, and often act as mediators under societal conflicts. This makes them decent leaders. Most Royals can be easily identified by their sense of justice, but other Royals choose to live more frivolously, and often take the physical forms of other celestial creatures. Overall, Royals are definitely the most abstract and diverse race. Many poses either slight to extreme mammalian motifs, such as dogs or cats. The Collectors do not like the Royals, for whatever reason…

WARRIORS:

Warriors are very literal in their nature: natural born fighters. Not magical powers, just pure and raw physical combat skills. Royals and Warriors get along very well, as Warriors agree to protect a Royal’s community through friendships among leaders. It is rare to see a Royal lead city without Warrior guards. Warriors each are born with their own unique skill set and weapon preferability that they go through trials at a young age to discover. Once they do, around an age comparable to 12 year old humans, they are ready to immediately begin an mentorship with an elder Warrior (they must not be related). Their bodies have sharp, pointy patterns, and whilst being fairly humanoid compared to the other races, have hints of dragon/wolf features, which are reminiscent of their powerful abilities, but also strong and loyal hearts.

COLLECTORS:

Not too much to say here, since you guys probably already know the collectors deal… collecting things… and stuff… but I’ll go over their general relationship with the other races: The Collectors, even compared to the other celestial beings, have a mysterious society and seemingly infinite knowledge. The other races, while complex themselves, can’t even being to comprehend what and why the collectors do what they do, and thanks to the Messengers slight relations, are only very afraid of them. Not just their power, but their seemingly deranged, or just, too immaculate mental states. They generally don’t bother the other races, besides that one apparent conflict with the Royals in the past. For now, the other races live in peace, but try not to think about what the collectors may be up to in the background. Most of the collectors have a very human-like appearance, which I think works well with the animalistic motifs of all the other races. Just like other animals on earth, they are aware of humanity’s presence and impact, but couldn’t comprehend what we are really up to all the time. Truly a terrifying reality.

As mentioned before, there is a final fifth race that I have yet to reveal, as I haven’t worked on them very much yet. But I hope this suffices for now :)

[insomniaccat0107]

so i saw some posts about how izuku too easily overcome his quirklessness after receiving ofa, right? mostly people in and under those posts say that it's a shame that we don't see the difficulties of re-thinking his identity and this situation is kinda unrealistic. well i can understand the upsetting feeling of not receiving an interesting point of character's self-discovering and stuff but i have a thing to say about how this thing will make sense (possibly).

so let's make an assumption that quirklessness in the world of bnha is some kind of disability. as far as i know we don't have clear statement in canon but it make sense, right? like if you search the word "disability" you will find something along the lines "the experience of any condition that makes it more difficult for a person to do certain activities or have equitable access within a given society". sooo in REAL world quirklessness isn't a disability because... well non of us here superpower, right? BUT on bnha world quirks are seen as an extension of human being like leg or hand. so it will be logical to assume that person without quirk can't be seen as fully capable as quirked one within society.

let's not bring the paranormal liberation front stuff because it's a topic for different post and I'm already getting far from point of this one.

so izuku is disabled in the beginning of the story, yeah? then why the hell he overcome his disability with a simple snap of fingers and why did it make sense?

now i will be coming from my perspective. I'm disabled and was like this for good chank of my life. and what usually come with it? disability becomes a part of person's identity. not only for people around disabled person but for them too.

now my rambling make even less sense but wait I'm getting to the point.

from interaction between izuku and bakugo + tone of voice of izuku's teacher in aldera we know that deku suffered from bulling BECAUSE of quirklessness. moreover when izuku asked all might can he become a hero, all might didn't ask him about his skills or why he feel a need to be a hero, no. all might just write him off solidly because of izuku's quirklessness and let me be honest: i believe that that wasn't the first time deku was given such "reality check".

can you smell that? oh yeah the good old ✨trauma✨

why did i wrote that i'll view this situation from perspective of my personal experience? well, i was bullied because of my disability back in school and guess what? most of the adults in my life didn't give me a chance to prove myself before they decide that I'm useless.

and that's the main reason why my disability become the thing that I'm activity trying to hide and don't let this abomination become a part of what make me who am i now.

can you see where I'm getting? izuku viewed his quirklessness as a thing that made his life harder and what made other people see him less of a human. so when The Miracle happened izuku just signed with relief and went ahead leaving behind the thing that made him miserable.

the last part of this ungodly long post: why do i believe that izuku doesn't let quirklessness become part of his identity and rather ignored it? well this is the part where i stop pretending that i have some Absolutely Logical Conclusions and become delusional. so we all remember that for the good part of plot izuku keep telling that he's gonna be hero like all might. well make sense because of ofa and all this razzle and dazzle with all might's successor, right? BUT this also can be applied to quirkless izuku. he WANTED and WAS GOING to become hero like all might, and i see it as if he didn't come in terms with his inability to become Just Like All Might. according to this statement izuku was ignoring differences between him and other (quirked) people. this make me believe that deep down he refuse to accept disability as part (or ex-part according to canon events) of himself.

is it healthy? no.

does izuku have a healthy image of himself? probably not.

did i just come up with unshaped pile of thoughts at night before bed and decide to vomit it straight into the internet? yes, i did.

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

With the Random Hobie HCs Post, I'd like to add that he probably advocates heavily for education in general. He absolutely holds little meets for students where they can learn history that they'll never find in the textbooks.

He would absolutely make sure students get the uncensored version of history. He's absolutely a strong believer of "if you don't know history, you're bound to repeat it"

He also makes sure to include the good parts of history as though to say "this is what it could be".

Overall you got my brain smiling at the idea of Hobie being a reader tySM

TEACHER HOBIE I'M SO SOFT

Teacher!Hobie Headcanons

No wonder he's so good with MayDay.

Like imagine, Hobie is strolling along and hear Peter foreloin that MayDay is having trouble with her shapes and colors. And MJ really wants to start her ahead on early pre-k. Get the big Parker brain going and all. And Peter's so frustrated and is he doing this dad thing right and maybe- Then he walks past a room while complaining to Miguel, only to see Hobie and MayDay sitting there with cards, practicing shapes and colors. She's delighted, it's like a game to her, and she's bright eyed and reacting. Hobie doesn't stop to acknowledge Peter and Peter doesn't interrupt, but he's so incredibly happy. He later tries to thank Hobie, but Hobie is like 'My pleasure, mate. Great kid."

He probably gets it from back home in 138, where he's more often 'Hobie'. I could see him in his time off, hanging out with local organizers.

Spider-punk sneaks in and steals books that are set to be burned or destroyed, and Hobie passes the books on to them.

I HC he tells the best stories, so the kids will sit around and hear stories of revolution, and indigenous people fighting for their land. Or about hippies protecting old forests. Or Black Panthers on the steps of the court house (*cough* Di *cough*)

But of course their favorite stories are the ones about Spider-punk. Hobie has told him that Spider-punk is his best friend and 'not to tell anyone'. And they make sure to keep his secret locked tight.

He tells them heroic stories of Spider-punk kicking the cops asses, and the kids all cheer - because it makes them a little less afraid when they see the pigs in the streets.

Some stuff can be hard to explain to them, or tell them - because history isn't always pretty. But they know they can ask questions and Hobie will always be kind. He always has an answer, never an 'I don't know', instead a 'I hope to learn that one day too'.

They really admire him. Sometimes hanging around the organizations and communist groups he'll read by himself, and the kids will see and run and grab their own. Sitting around him for impromptu reading time.

Even the teenagers the pass off to him. Kids like Gwen.

13 - 16 year olds, runaways looking for a better life, kids who lost their parents and are angry, ready to fight for the cause. Or sometimes, kids of cops, disgusted enough to wake up and leave.

Sometimes they're scared or quiet. Hobie always helps them open up, always figures out what they're willing to fight for. And some of them are angry, loud, some don't trust them. But he can get on anyone's good side. He understands the anger, he knows how to direct it.

Soon they just follow him because he leads by example. Everyday he comes in and ten different people are ready to talk to him about the recent developments on the fight for freedom in South America, or a recent anarchist rally over in Ireland.

Hobie loves it, because he loves people and he loves being a teacher.

Even at Society

Pavi probably didn't know much when he joined. He knew Gwen and Hobie very well, and he's been Spider-man 6 months, so he had to have joined maybe 3-4 months into being Spider-man, or even earlier.

He was probably so green, now look at him. How many 'bits of advice-' do you think he gave Pav?

If you're a new recruit with mechanical webshooters, he'll casually ask to see them - compliment their worksmanship, give you some new ideas. Or try to help out in little ways. Sewing kit in his vest for patches and rips in Spidey-suits.

Imagine learning how to Spidey-quip from Hobie!!! And having him be your hype-man during jokes in battle!

Just like he throws Pav in ATSV, Hobie throwing a Spider-person so they can get the last attack in.

Or even just helping around campus. He'll walk people to the food court if they're lost and looking for it. Or stop and talk to people who look like they need help with something.

Pulling others aside and asking if they need someone to practice training with, telling them 'Don't worry, you'll get it'.

I BET HES A MENTOR like Jess or Peter! Having him as a mentor would be so cool. Him lazily checking in on your during missions from his houseboat cause - hey he gets to work from home? cool.

Always defends you to Miguel.

[mynameisnotthepoint]

Ossan no pantsu EP 4

Disclaimer: I had already watched this drama with subs that were mostly machine translated, so this is less of a first time reaction and more of an "i finally have the whole picture now". This will contain spoilers, so be warned!

As always: thank you to @isaksbestpillow for continuing to provide us with excellent subs to this drama!!

My jumbled thoughts/recap

Daichi and his boyfriend Madoka are wonderful together, even in the moments that they are outside and can't show the full extent of their relationship. They are fond. It shows in the way they smile at each other. Like @bengiyo said in his review of ep 4: it is so good to see Daichi not as this all-knowing gay fairy godfather who saves everyone, he has his own life, with his own troubles, too. And a tree of a boyfriend - Higishi Keisuke is HUGE. (Also, I love the whale poster Madoka has on his apartment walls, did he want to work with sea animals?).

When talking about why he should finish high school, Kakeru only talks about his mom. His dad has been quite stifling to him, and has not respected his boundaries.

"What if you thought about it like this [:] "I'm not bad for causing my mom trouble. Instead, I'm greatful to her for respecting my opinion even if it causes her trouble."" (Daichi to Kakeru, translation @isaksbestpillow) line is fantastic. In episode 3, we as viewers learned that Daichi has been the target of homophobic bullying and that his mom supports him wholeheartedly. He can really understand and relate to what Kakeru is going through, and it is no wonder that he is the only one who can really get him out of his shell, who is allowed inside his room.

And his mom is the one who keeps telling him, over and over, that he is safe in this room and this house. That he can always come back if he doesn't manage at school. She even stays home from work the day he goes to school so she can be there for him if he needs her. Mika is so gentle with Kakeru. She is also really good at reigning in her own enthusiasm/strong emotions as to not startle her son into running away.

Mika's kindness here almost made me cry. Mika and Moe both make sure Kakeru feels loved and will defend him to Makoto if necessary. Moe's "Because society won't wait, isn't that why the family pretends to wait," (Moe to Makoto, translation by @isaksbestpillow) also made me almost cry. They might not know what specifically Kakeru is going through, but they will respect and cherish him.

Makoto has all along known what it feels like to be bullied, and yet he perpetuated the same harshness of toxic masculinity he experienced onto his son (or he did it, because he hoped that in that way, his son didn't have to experience the same thing he did - boy, was he wrong). And his wife doesn't realise he wants to talk about serious stuff (maybe that is just not something he does while eating dinner) and is in her fandom world - while still doing chores for the family. She is doing physical labour for the family but at least she is free from emotional labour for a bit.

To get personal here for a second: My mom was raised quite free of gender expectations, as her dad wanted to pass on his knowledge of technical stuff and only had three daughters. My mom tried to pass it onto me, down to not liking the color pink, but quickly realised i was not interested in building things or taking radios apart (i am a language nerd...). I wanted to be a princess at 4 years old, a boy from 5 to 10 years old, and then as a teen I tried to be as girly as possible. My parents didn't mind me dressing in all boys' clothing (the girls' clothing was often too narrow for my stocky body anyways) and I was allowed to run around shirtless. I still remember my grey camo pants fondly. My neon girl teen phase with the strong eyeliner was less their thing - they disliked my overtly feminine expression more than me being tomboyish. Now I am back to being more androgynous, with bouts of feminity in between. And sadly, i never got into technical stuff :/

Makoto is trying to help and understand Kakeru. His enthusiasm about Kakeru going back to school has been reigned in by his wife, so he is - at least for a bit - less grand in his approach. His offer of him changing schools so he doesn't have to wear the boys' uniform is considerate. I do not speak Japanese, but I realised that Kakeru uses the masculine pronoun "boku", which is more polite than "ore", which one hears other male characters in the series occasionally use. Thank you to @isaksbestpillow for explaining this phenomenon to me! She also pointed out that the only time he uses "ore" is when he tries to convince the girls in his class that he doesn't know anything about make-up after being super enthusiastic about an eyeshadow pallet. (Language is so interesting!! Which made me realise once again I should probably always ask or at least research before going into too much analysis of things i hear/read with regards to this series)

"You've endured my pressuring for years. There can't be anyone at your school as ignorant and obstinate as me. [...] You've got enough immunity." It is sad that this motivation works. Makoto does know what to say sometimes. Still has foot in mouth syndrome, though.

"What if you thought about it like this? "I admire myself for trying, even if it doesn't work out." (Daichi to Kakeru, translation by @isaksbestpillow) Kakeru is truly brave for going to school after only going outside for a little while. It is so overwhelming, suddenly being surrounded by people, especially your peers that scare you. Kakeru running off to the sick bay is truly so relatable. And yet, this sentence from Daichi gives him strength enough to go back to the classroom, even make a connection with the girls that were occupying his assigned school desk.

I love Shizuka, one of Kakeru's new school friends: She makes sure everyone knows his name, and also isn't mad at all that he won't join for karaoke. You really need someone like her in your corner when trying to gain back your footing in a social group. Also, the girls decide call him Kakeru-tan (which I searched up is a cute form of -chan, so they acknowledge Kakeru's cuteness in their chosen honorific for him!!). Yet his meeting with self-appointed make-up guru Karina firmly puts him back with his two feet on the ground: making friends with people isn't easy...

And lastly:

I want to tell this to my bosses every week... This series truly captures the difference between generations (also, Makoto truly is a people-pleasing pushover. By letting others pile work onto him, he also has to pile it on his subordinates...)

[lemotmo]

No worries if this is too close to BT stuff to answer, but I was curious about your take...why are so many anti-Buddies obsessed with claiming we're all children? The issue worsened with the rise of BT, but I saw it happening even before that, and I've never understood where the sentiment came from.

It feels like they take a couple IG comments, see that the nastier ones are from younger users, extrapolate that the nastiness is all Buddie stans, and extrapolate that all Buddie stans are also young people (under the age of 24-ish), and therefore immature.

But why use that argument? The alleged "children" shipping Buddie have evidently kept going for six years now, so the maturity that supposedly will cause us to grow out of Buddie surely would have taken hold on a wider scale?

Is it literally down to wanting to believe they're older and wiser than us? I straight up don't understand the psychological benefit they get from thinking that way...

Nah Nonny, I think I can answer this just fine, because this is something that predates the BT fandom and it isn't anything specific to them. It happened when the guys were in other relationships as well. I've seen a lot of those comments over all the years in the Buddie fandom.

Hell, I've even seen this happen in other fandoms.

It always comes down to the "You are too young. You can't possibly understand how a relationship between two adults works. You have to have some life experience for that."

I think it might have to do with the fact that children and young people are easier to dismiss. (I'm not saying you should make a habit of dismissing kids and young people by the way. Let it be known that this is a very bad habit we should all get rid off as a society.)

When you like a canon ship and one of the people in that ship is also heavily shipped with another character, AND that ship is by far the more popular one, it can get frustrating to be confronted by that fact over and over again. Especially when you are convinced that the canon ship is superior.

It also doesn't help when the actors of the fanon ship are happily playing along with it while completely ignoring the canon ship that should -in theory- be more important.

I think that claiming that all the Buddie fans are children makes it easier to dismiss us as a bunch of young people who haven't a clue what they're talking about. They can pat themselves on the back and convince themselves that they are right and the Buddie fans are wrong. In a way it's a form of self-delusion.

Thing is... the Buddie fandom is made up of people of many different ages. I am well into my forties. I have mutuals who are in their fifties. Some are in their thirties and yes... I have mutuals that are in their twenties.

And guess what? The posts I read that are written by a twenty year old are just as valid as the posts I read that are written by a fifty year old.

Yes, they have different life experiences, come from different places and have different POVs but that is exactly what makes this fandom so great. We have so much input from people of all ages.

Besides... what is life experience anyway? In real life I know a twenty-five year old that has been in three relationships while I also know a fifty-year old that has never had a relationship. Both of them will have valid and interesting insights into having healthy relationships, but only one of them will be able to talk about it from experience.

See what I mean?

Anyway, I hope this made sense Nonny. It did in my head, but I am prone to babble sometimes and I'm not always sure my point comes across when I do that. :D

If someone has additional insight into this phenomenon, feel free to share it with us in the comments. But please don't make this all about the BT fandom. This is fandom behaviour that is far bigger and more widespread than that one single fandom.

Have a great day!

[familyofpaladins]

I HAD A REVELATION

okay so I was thinking about gender. My gender. And my feelings about being a cis girl over time.

When I was little I used to wear all kinds of dresses and wore nail polish and even occasionally makeup (but like. Sloppily as a 7 year old would lol) and how overtime I stopped wearing nail polish and stopped wearing dresses and despised make up. I dont really remeber why I stopped with nail polish. Maybe because it flaked off too easily or maybe I was sick of the few colors we had idk. I know I gradually stopped wearing dresses and night gowns because I was sick of being told I couldnt "put my legs up [up against the wall or just straight up in the air] or that I had to sit a certain way while wearing one. So I wore more and more pants.

I think about how i used to stand in the toys aisles while my mom did grocery shopping and look at "The Boys" section and think how much cooler it was than the girls section.

And I think about how my music teacher told us one day we'd hit puberty and we'd grow and us girls would be like "[in a high pitched voice] OH MY GOSH I LOVE BOYS AND DID YOU HEAR ABOUT SO AND SO" and I looked over at my classmates and friends to see if they were also terrified of becoming annoying teenage boy-obsessed girls.

And i think about how when I was at my friend's house and we were building "tree forts" in the woods i would wish I had a penis for the convenience of being able to just go pee behind a tree, because squatting near the ground was Not Fun and I hated walking all the way back to the house. And I think about how I hated that I'd have to wear a bra once my boobs started to come in

Now you might be thinking. Friend I think you want[ed] to be a boy. But the thing is, i dont.

I may have hated being restricted in dresses but I dont actually hate them. I've gotten a couple dresses in the last 10 years (for prom and graduation and a [not my] wedding) and how I actually did like how I looked in them and enjoyed wearing them for that time.

I think about how I was jealous of the boys selection of toys, but also how I had a ton of barbies that I massively enjoyed and how if I'd been a boy I probably wouldnt have been able to enjoy them (thanks to pressure from society) as well as a bunch of other "girly" items and shows and movies. I think about how I'm actually Asexual and that I wasnt scared of becoming "a young woman", I just didnt understand the obsession with sex/romance/boyfriend&girlfriend stuff.

And while having a penis is more convenient for peeing I also remeber thinking that it would suck to get kicked in the balls and/or that trope of falling on soemthign between your legs that happens in so many movies (not that it feels any better with a vagina honestly). And that if I had been born a boy I'd most likely have to deal with all the toxic masculinity forced on me, and I'm glad I dont have to deal with that.

And while me and my boobs dont always get along, I remember that after getting my first cute bra, I thought. Oh well maybe this isnt so bad. And I mostly wear sports bras now because I do wish they were smaller and I HATE that so many bras (EVEN THE SPORTS BRAS) are already padded into cup shapes, and while I don't mind Having Boobs, i Do Not want to show them off. And sometimes i think that maybe i wouldn't mind chopping them off, but then i think how my figure/outline/silhouette would look with out them, and that seems worse.

And i think about the times I've accidentally been called "Sir" from tired fast food employees when wearing gender nonspecific clothing and felt happy about it. But not "oh it feels right to be called sir/he/him" , but more of "hehe I fooled you! You thought this was a dress but its pants!"

And really this is all to say. I was born a girl and grew up that way so it's what I'm used to. If I'd been born with a dick then I guess I'd be a guy. If you magically stuck me in a male body right now, would I feel like a Guy or feel like a girl in a guys body? I honestly dont know. So am I non binary? Maybe that that doesnt quite feel right either.

Being a girl is what I've grown up as and into, and it's what I'm used to and going by anything else is… odd. Maybe itd be better and maybe it wouldnt. It's like an old blanket. You've had it forever and maybe its frayed and patched maybe a little too small and it's not what people expect you to have for a blanket, and maybe you could do with a new one. But nothing feels right with out it. No other blanket feels the same. It's what you're used to and its familar. It's a comfort blanket.

And that's why being a [cis] girl is my comfort gender.