#genitalia cw

[forget-me-not-automaton]

One thing that I’ve learned about being on T is that when the bottom is growthing it either feels like you need to piss really bad (trying to doesn’t help) or like your crotch has been springlocked and there is no in between-

[nocontextwarriornun]

[abomnibus]

An Angel.

[zalcolm]

reblog if you either eat at least one of the following:

toilet paper

drywall

pineapple on pizza

human skin

pussy

but no one is able to guess which

[blackcur-rants]

Honestly, “The Godfather” as a whole can honestly be seen as a twisted, dark reflection of the traditional Arthurian legends, with Michael as Arthur and Vito as both Uther and Merlin and Kay as Guinevere and Tom Hagen as Lancelot. Like, I don’t know if anyone else has pointed it out, but Kay is also the name of Arthur’s foster brother/one of his first knights and Hagen is evocative of the troublesome and treacherous Hagen of Tronje in the “Lay of the Nibelungs”. And in a twisted version of how Arthur managed to maintain his virtue and integrity and goodness even as his realm collapsed around him, Michael in Part Two manages to maintain his political power and prestige but loses all of the people who gave his life true meaning from Tom to Kay to Fredo.

By the way, @angevinyaoiz, if you enjoy the way Puzo and Coppola both mix the epic and the modern mundane in his writing style, may I recommend both “IT” by Stephen King and “Ulysses” by James Joyce, which both do similar things with regards to the mixture of the mythic and the modern?

@cynicalclassicist @carcosa-commune @dachi-chan25 @disregardcanon @ladyasteria

reading through the og Godfather novel and it's SO fun to do so as a Medievalhead because it's of course very modern And pulpy but also a lot of passages end up feeling to me like medieval style or mediev inspired epic poetry inspired fantasy kinda. Puzo writes about Sicilians like fantasy authors do about an Cool Fantasy Race. Also ofc like Coppola pointed out it's an archetypical "Once there was a King with Three Sons" story but amusingly medieval to me in that it has that structure, especially in ch 14 where it goes into Vito's history, of like "the great emperor conquered and subdued the neighboring dissenting clans," and then lists the different groups in detail with tangential references to their Great Deeds and notable characteristics. It even mixes a little with Real History by incorporating the Capones, tho in a derisive way. (Also amusing that it follows that kind of story structure of "our great kingdom expands and flourishes.......until the TURKS pulled some BULLSHIT" )

When Vito calls the 5 families it does more of that kind of epic poem style where it sits down and lists everyone and names everyone super specifically and their loyalties and (racial) epithets, and then after the debate he makes his Cool Poetic Speech about protecting Michael which feels like to me welling out of some ancient space. This feels like it should be in some kind of verse:

This and the way Sonny is described in the Vito chapters and leading up to his death has a very epic epithets quality to it as well like ah yes, he of the Big Penis, named for devotion, witness of the First Death, wielder of the Anglo-Saxon Gun, taker of the mantle, in cold honorable rage went forth and was slain

[the-halcyon-effect]

"i support asexuals" do you? do you appropriately tag your nsfw posts? can you accept that sexual liberation includes accepting and loving people who don't want sex? can you talk to or think about a trans person without focusing on their genitals? do you see queerness as inherently sexual? can you accept that, even though queer history has a lot to do with sex, there's much, much more that doesn't have to do with it? do you respect the boundaries of people who ask you not to make sexual jokes or talk about sex around them? are you normal about the asexuals who want nothing to do with sex? can you accept the idea of non-sexual kink? are you normal about people who want physical intimacy without sex? are you normal about people who disagree with you about what's "sexy" or "erotic"? or do you only respect us when we're willing and able to uphold your suffocatingly sexual view of queerness?

(allosexuals are encouraged but not required to reblog)

[gabessquishytum]

Just a concept I won’t write a proper fic for, but I thought you’d enjoy. Off anon because I’m putting in a specific detail I’m probably including in a fic I will write properly at some point, so might as well.

Hob works for a cleaning company. They give him the keys, the address, and have him go to town on the empty houses for however many days it takes. Yeah, days, because we’re not talking just any houses, but big fuckoff mansions that haven’t seen a duster in decades. You know, the sort of houses that might have loads of antique and/or expensive stuff in them. So much of it, even, that no one will notice if Hob takes home a few pieces (read: sells them to the best bidder).

Hob gets called to the Burgess house because the owner is going on a months-long business trip, and like the spoiled rich cunt he is he wants the house cleaner than he left it when he returns, but has no intentions of paying the regular staff while he’s away.

Honestly? The house doesn’t look promising. Hob has a look around as he cleans and there’s a lot of old books, but it’s hard to guess the value of those to begin with and this… is some pretty obscure stuff? Looks cult-y to Hob, and he’s not about to fuck with that. He does find a huge fucking ruby pendant, but he has a feeling Burgess will notice that missing. There is a locked basement, though. That’s promising.

The key to the basement is hard enough to find, which is also very promising, but when Hob unlocks the door he’s met with… a dingy, dark, damp basement, and is that a fucking moat? A hint of gold draws his eye, and that’s when he sees it.

A big glass and steel… container? Surrounded by a circle of golden lines and scribbles on the floor. Again, looks cult-y… no. Not a container. A cage. There’s something in there, something with tiny white pinpricks for eyes.

Too curious for his own good, Hob gets closer, using his lighter to illuminate the space. And what he sees is… a man. A beautiful, very naked, reed-thin yet muscular man, but a man. Except for the eyes, black as night with gleaming pupils. And only for a moment. He’s only a man for a moment, because when Hob gets close (in a hurry to free him, Hob’s not a saint, Hob’s fucked with human trafficking before but he’s bloody not doing that again-), the man transforms.

His shape doesn’t change much -prominent ribs, long limbs, lean muscles- but he does get bigger, taller. The shock of ink-black hair on his head spreads all over his body, short mostly with big longer tufts at his chest, groin, elbows and… ears. He has large cat-like ears now, and a long tail to match, and a carnivore’s teeth.

Something about the man stays so human, though. His expression, just something about him, that makes Hob not want to run.

“I wasn’t going to hurt you.” He eyes up the creature, basically a were-panther? Were-feline of some sort? Anyway, an 8 feet tall big cat in human shape, and Hob ponders just how deeply he wants to fuck himself. He doesn’t care about losing his job, bugger that, but… “Will you kill me, if I get you out of this? I’d really like to get you out of this.”

There’s no answer, but there is a very human expression of surprise. Maybe he cannot speak. Hob remembers the books, though, and the scribbles on the floor. The glass is thick, but Hob is pretty damn strong, and smart enough to figure out the rest.

Turns out that Dream (that’s the man’s name) is a very powerful, very magical shapeshifter. He can speak, just not without air to breathe. And he’s very very grateful Hob freed him from a hell of loneliness, suffocation and starvation. He’s not open about his gratitude, at first, and haughty as hell about it later, but he really quite likes Hob. As he stays at Hob’s place (technically in-case-I’m-caught-robbing safehouse) he becomes quite affectionate and possessive with Hob, proprietary even… and Hob is not the type to turn down a beautiful man. Or a beautiful big cat, as it turns out.

Hob is especially delighted to find that the big “spines” on Dream’s huge feline cock aren’t sharp things like on a house cat, but rather cartilage not unlike on a human eartip, which bend this way and that and make Dream hiss in pleasure when Hob takes his cock in hand, and feel so so good inside Hob ❤

Ommggg my friend this is such a good concept, there are so many details that I love and appreciate! I really like the idea of Hob having a cleaning company that's a cover up to steal stuff. The idea of him rifling through antiques just really appeals to me. He enjoys the history of it all, as well as the money that he earns on those little trinkets!

And were-panther Dream!! I love him already. The idea of him basically deciding that Hob belongs to him now is so hot! Even in human form Dream is strong and tall, especially when he's no longer starving. He can pick Hob up and throw him around... and his paws in feline form feel incredible as they press against Hob’s chest and pin him to the bed. Dream growls softly against his ear, pants hot breath and against his neck and absolutely ravishes Hob until he can barely walk... and then he uses his big sensitive cat tongue to lick every drop of his seed from Hob’s body <3

So yeah. Big fan of this whole concept. Would LOVE to read more from you, dear friend! Thank you for sharing!

[pluralquotebook]

🥞 (transmasc): we need to get a dick IMMEDIATLETY

🎮 (cis girl): noooo... my pussy..,

🎀 (transfem): no i agree w 🥞

🎮: YOU DONT EVEN WANT IT

🎲 (transmasc): i aquiesse* we need the penis

📸 (agender): im on the pussy side of this debate

🎧⚡️ (bigender): can we have both pretty please

🍜 (detransitioned cis girl): have you considered The Medical System Sucks Ass and also We Are Broke?

(collective complaining)

-- sparkle sparkle gambling system

(*🎲 is intentionally mispronouncing acquiesce to make a point)

.

[dailyenglishteacher]

ENGLISH TEACHER | 1X03 "Kayla Syndrome"

[turtletaubwrites]

Your Katakuri fic was so sweet!(no pun intended) I think a honeymoon continuation would be great but even without it’s the cutest thing ever just to think about!

Thank you so much! I'm falling for this big softie now 😭🍩💜

It was going to be a one shot, but they are just so stinkin' cute that I'm thinking about writing their honeymoon. It's just...

He's just...

He's 16 and a half ft (509 cm) tall!?!!

I prefer to stick close to canon, but this would definitely be in the monster fucking category, and my brain has been trying to work out the logistics, lol

If I can't figure it out, I'll probably write another fluffy SFW part and fade to black I guess...

Let me know in the poll below if you'd like me to attempt some Katakuri smut, lol. (My first poll ever is about whether or not to bang a giant, I love it here 😂)

I love him, and I want him, but look at him compared to the average women's height (which is my exact height, lol)

😳😳😳

I could make out with his knees 🤦🏼‍♀️

Side note, the internet is so fucking funny. I was trying to look up what an average range of penis size would be if the person was 16.5 ft tall, but all I could find was a slew of men yelling that height has nothing to do with it.

Yes, I know, my guys. I just need to know if Katakuri can consummate without killing his sweet little doughnut girl 😅

Lol, I had to look it up again before posting this. Apparently the average U.S. length is 7.68% of height sooo. How we feeling about 14.5 inches (39 cm)??? let me know 😳

[stellas--symbols]

Swear Word Icons for AAC!

Warning: this post contains cartoon sexual imagery, and multiple potentially offensive swear words

Swearing, Swear, Slur Shit, Shithead, Stupid Ass, Bull, Bullshit Middle finger, Dickhead, Asshole Damn, Bitch, Fuck

[envy-stims]

penis typo stimboard

[zal-cryptid]

when jen said she had abnormal sex anatomy i just assumed she was a transwoman but then she mentions not having to worry about periods anymore being a benefit of being a toy, am i wrong in my assumption then?

Jennifer is intersex! She has (or I guess had) an ovotestis (a gonad containing ovarian and testicular tissue). She also had an enlarged clitoris that formed a sort of pseudophallus. She was very self-conscious about it.

Having clothes that never come off and nothing between her legs is a blessing to her - she never has to see herself naked again. Perhaps in a better world where she had better parents and wasn’t taught to be ashamed of herself, she could have grown up to be proud and love herself.

[onetimemacaroni]

I think the best way to describe my transition goal is. I want my body to be a Swiss Army knife of genitalia.

I have boobs and I have a vagina and I have a penis. Multiple in fact.

Who needs a lockpick when I can fuck the door with my cockpick until it opens. Need a fire pit out? My fire hose penis can take care of of it. Hat rack? I got a penis for that. Who needs a bag when I have my purssy or my sack tits.

One of my penises can shoot laser btw. I won’t say which.

[gabessquishytum]

Dream loves sucking cock, loves licking them and warming them for hours if he could. The one thing he’s not particularly fond of though is deepthroating; he has a fairly strong gag reflex, and just doesn’t like the sensation the handful of times he’s tried and managed it anyway.

Thank goodness he’s finally gotten together with Hob, whose small cock is just the perfect size to sit in Dream’s mouth without touching his throat, even if he takes in all the way to the hilt. Dream’s obsessed with it, constantly looking for any excuse to get on his knees for his boyfriend, and is quite happy to spend long hours with his head between Hob’s legs.

And when his mouth isn’t full, he’s quite happy to praise Hob for how tiny and perfect his cock is, you’d think it was especially designed for Dream, how no one else can appreciate his adorable little gift of a cock.

If Dream is fucking him, he’s almost always sure to still have a hand petting it, commenting how it’s such a wonderful toy to play with while they make love. If Hob is fucking him, Dream will usually be teasing him that he’s using the wrong hole, that his cock was clearly shaped and sized for Dream’s mouth, since it’s not doing much for his ass (he says all this even as he’s still moving his hips).

Hob of course comes embarrassingly fast every time, since it’s all somehow hitting both his humiliation and praise kinks simultaneously

-🪽anon

Small cock appreciation club!!!!

Dream honestly thinks that Hob's small cock is perfect, and maybe that's why all the chat about it turns Hob on SO much. In theory it should be degrading to be teased for something that is traditionally considered a negative physical trait. But Dream is totally sincere when he waxes lyrical on the subject of the minimal length, the underwhelming size, the negligible thickness. He means all of these descriptions in an extremely complimentary way. Hob’s horny brain struggles to match Dream’s enthusiastic, breathless tone of voice with his frankly humiliating language... and his body ultimately decides that it is very much into the whole thing. Dream is both amused and horny about it too, so of course he turns up the notch on his lovingly mean descriptions of Hob’s cock: how cute it is when it kind of disappears into his lap when he sits down. How sweet it looks when fully hard but still no more than a finger in length. Dream firmly asserts that he could never ever be with another man, because Hob’s cock is perfect - it may as well have been designed for Dream’s needs. He simply couldn't live without the pleasure of delving his hand into Hob’s underwear and fishing around for his cute little prick.

The only problem is that Hob now has some kind of pavlovian association with all of those words describing his size - small, tiny, little - and arousal. He can never order a small coffee in peace ever again. But God, he wouldn't have it any other way...