#fun times in the Game Kid world!
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Man, it's cool and all if you see a metaphor for marginalisation in the monstrous, and if you want the power fantasy of 'what if you could just eat anybody who threatened you/pissed you off'. Me too.
However, as soon as you start saying 'no, these monsters are a 1:1 on Specific Marginalised Group, and you have to treat them in the fiction like they are directly representative of real human members of the marginalised group', BUT you also, in the fiction, make them hurt/kill/eat humans? And then try to shame me, your audience, for noticing or engaging with the bit where they kill people, because you made them directly representative of a real-world marginalised group? You have lost me, and also, I think, the plot.
#hear yourself. for the love of whatever you cherish.#'but they only kill bigots so ACTUALLY they're the GOOD GUYS -' your metaphor of monstrosity is entirely premised on the question of#'what if what you went around righteously killing; believing your actions to be justified;#were actually people and it was not in fact righteous or justified to just kill them'#'what if the world isn't neatly split into 'good guys' and 'bad guys'#who gets to decide who or what is 'bad'? because that's the original problem of monstrosity-as-metaphor-for-marginalisation#(if as a creator you say 'oh my intention with this was X' cool!#if instead you go with something like. well.#'well in this setting monsters are so rare it doesn't matter that they kill people and you'd have to be a homicidal sadistic psychopath >#< to hunt them; but sure I guess if you want to play a Bad Person' well I might have#but if you're going to explicitly judge me for wanting to engage with the moral question of 'how justified is this and who would do it#versus how justified are these monsters if they do have to harm or kill people to continue to exist'#then maybe I just don't want to play your game at all)#anyway I'm sick to death of poor uwu cozy vampires who are SO marginalised so I'm not Allowed to care about all the people they murder#it being fucked up is what's fun about it! do all the other shit but let me take the murders seriously!#and inb4 someone accuses me of being a bigot for saying 'actually I don't think you get a free pass to kill and eat people if you're gay'#remember when the CW's famously reactionary and conservative Supernatural tried to just gloss over the part where every time its heroes >#< killed a demon with a magic knife it also killed the person the demon was possessing#and say 'oh no it's fine we don't care about those killings; they don't matter; don't bother caring about them either'#but they were doing it to glorify exactly the kind of people that these 'monster as metaphor' stories are trying to cast as expendable?#I have other examples that are like. real dramas. but That Paranormal Show is the one that's in the same niche that I'm talking about here#it feels more insidious when it comes through a fantasy show where there are monsters involved#so you can say 'no it's not real so it doesn't matter'#but then ALL of it is equally not real. and vampires are not actually an oppressed group. because they don't exist.#you can say 'these vampires are a metaphor for an oppressed group so this fiction matters in real life'#or you can say 'don't care about the murders because they weren't actually real'#but you can't say both and then get mad at ME for treating the murders as seriously as the vampires#let me engage with your premise and don't waste my fucking time#or just set your fluff in the Sesame Street universe where vampires drink cherry Kool-Aid and help kids learn to count
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Kingdom Hearts 3 - Toy Box
#kingdom hearts 3#kh3#toy box#scenery#my gif#running around andy's room and seeing sora donald and goofy's toy themed appearance for the first time is such a vivid memory for me#they went so hard making that toy store it's soooo detailed. just imagine all of the assets needed to fill the place#box art for toys; video game cover cases; various figures/toys to put out on display for a variety of different toy departments#they could have remade al's toy barn but no they created this huge three story tall mega super store#it's every kids dream and looks too grand and amazing to be an actual existing building in the toy story canon lol#but even the plot elements of this world are so intriguing#there's the introduction of yozora; the gigas mechs; having sora thrown into a tv screen right into the verum rex game; split worlds#so much happens here and i just know it'll be fully recontextualized in future game installments#i'm really looking forward to that#but all of that aside it's really neat to be toy sized#it's all just such a fun experience. good world
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𝐃𝐑𝐀𝐆𝐎𝐍 𝐀𝐆𝐄: 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐕𝐄𝐈𝐋𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃 ➸ irulanne . the rook .
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#oc: irulanne#leg.ocs#leg.edits#*myedits#*ocedit#dragon age rook#da:tv#datv#my necromancer !!!!!!! my baby she’s here!!#teehee the first of the rooks !! so far i have 4 on standby for the fall the brainworms are brainwormingg jnhdkhnsk#spot the lucanne reference hehee twas a must to add something of luca in there he and lanna have had me in a CHOKEHOLD all a week hehe <3#colorings by cavalier remainn ICONIC andd SPEAKING OF WHICH THIS TEMPLATE GOLLY HOLLY#ty tyy orion this template was SOO good *screams* i had SO much fun working with it!!!!!#alsoo the official tarot for necromancers / mages / sidony from inky youll always be loved by MEE.#i am not sure if i want to go too much into her lore yet as its so early but the brainrot is brainrotting and i have SOO many thoughts!!#her history her lore how i see her interacting with the world and the world with her lanna's personality and her dynamic with luca AHHHH#*rattling the bars of my cage* FALL COME SOONER !!#lanna has had the braincell for the week STRAIGHT hdbjh <33#the high stakes tennis match between dragon show and dragon game brainrot hehe <33#ill hopefully have something for them too soooon I MISSED THEMM SO MUCHH#her lighthouse outfit + luca's outfit hehe couples that wear *almost* matching outfits thats soulmates or something (im normal) HEHEE#her name (hopefully the last time i change it djksncks) is inspired by i*rulan from d*une !!#an arcane prodigy entering her girlfailure era <33 girlbossed too close to the sun if u will JNDKJDSN#seemingly puts on an air of confidence but hides BIIIG time nervous wreck energy shes gonna take messing things up well i can feel it :')#i feel like a lot of clothes for her are sort of reminiscent of her time in the mourn watchers? all based on aspects of the dead??#like bones or etc?? but i also love that she could be a lightning learning mage with other magic so she takes to that more ethereal nature#to her style !! she’s also a BIG fan of the opera and was sort of praised as this golden child an arcane prodigy#the gifted kid to burnout adult pipeline she is really feeling it now 🥀🤧#hi hi moots if u read all that i am baking you cookies as we speak THERES SO MUCH MORE LOREE on her i have im screaming she’s everythingg#AHH IT WORKED IT POSTED <33 so so happy i can yell about her now HEHE 🥀💌
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pmdd has you crying in bed like "and the fact that I cry for like three days every month is another reason why no one will ever love me!!!"
patently ridiculous illness
#pmdd#I had a serious problem with emotional regulation when I was a child#probably because of poorly understood neurodivergence#but I cried about EVERYTHING all the time forever#I felt like literally anything that happened was the worst thing in the entire world#I was a small nervous dog all the time#and I was always convinced that there was this nebulous Awful Consequence that would happen if I wasn't perfect#so like I would lose at a game? cry. favorite movie wasn't on? cry. made a mistake on a test? cry. rules of a game changed? cry. and so on#I wanted to be a good child SO badly#the only time I was ever sent to the principal ever was because I was crying too much and it was disrupting my kindergarten class#and you can... probably guess how I reacted to that#anyway whenever I get these PMDD crying jags now it reminds me of this time when I was little#I came home SOBBING#and my parents were like oh no honey what happened#and I said I was crying because the kids were making fun of me for crying too much :')#it's that same circular logic#sobbing because I have the disease that makes you hate yourself and sob#and then hating myself more because of the sobbing#it's genuinely so fucking dumb#and there is that part of me that's like 'girl just go make a sandwich and calm down'#but you can't really rationalize yourself out of it huh
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It’s so good to see you.
Lies of P (2023)
#I finished lying and penising for the last time…#I got the game for my PS5 after 100%ing it on game pass bc I was so impressed and obsessed I needed to get a physical copy#so I obviously had to 100% it again and I hilariously forgot to read a letter to unlock an achievement#so I had to play the game a FOURTH TIME since you only get the letter at the end and restarting the game wipes all letters from your bag#but that let me do something I LOVE doing with these shorter games#which is putting the effort to give these characters the best endings their quests allow#so I can leave the characters in the world with as much peace as I can#I also did this in majora’s mask with my final run of the game being about doing every single side quest I could and beating ever boss#so that termina would be as peaceful as it would be once the mask was destroyed and skull kid freed#that being said wearing the alidoro mask led to an unintentionally hilarious semi final cutscene#a tear is supposed to roll down your face at one point but instead it was just a completely still super close shot of the dog mask#and I burst out laughing like nooooooo#luckily I’ve scene the ending like 3 times already but can you imagine if that was the only time I’d seen it 😂#I one rounded nameless puppet this time I truly felt like a god I’m so grateful for neowiz for making this game its been so fun#even after beating it like 7 times I know I’ll be playing it again one day and I’m gonna be a preorder ho for the Lies of series#the DLC and sequel can’t come soon I’m so in love with this game I need to eat it#Lies of P#video games#lies of p sophia#lies of p carlo
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ruyan is literally so beautiful that i get ill looking at her
#a lot of my time as a person who cant recognize himself to the point that if you start asking about myself im going to lie to you#is that i really like to engage with media that asks you to be present in the text by creating an outside being who simply has#some similarities to me#like the concepts i know i have. but make them their own unique person#so ruyan is really fun in that if i was a well adjusted person she would probably be a self insert and not her own person#but instead by the grace of god and my own mental problems she exists and is a full person that i practically see as a friend#like when i like a character so much that they become a comfort to me (emil) my brain engages in relationship interpretation to that#chartacter. emil is my daughter who i feel paternal sentiments to despite me being a human person and her being code in a video game#for ruyan she is like a friend where i want to go to her wedding and see her kids and hear about her life#i may have made her but i watch her as if i just met her'#recognizing this thing i have going on has helped me immensely be comfortable with myself#ruyan is a friend to me a sister tock is my daughter who i feel a real world father-daughter dynamic towards#i feel the need to nourish her and entertain her and put her to bed and let her know i love her#and you dont have to think this is normal because if you by now havent harbored some sort of#This Guy is Weird sentiment towards me youre either like me or VERY kind#but i know that i have parts of me that are weird. i am 23 years old bringing toys to the beach#but i dont chase validation so much as i just enjoy when its given to me#but i dont need validation because i cant even form my own self to need validation for#im learning about myself like im wiping down an old mirror. that doesnt need validation because im seeing it for the first time#im having my understanding moment here and you are free to leave the room and leave me to my mirrow
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daily may day 17: sacrifice
don’t let me let u down ☹️
#queen#saguaro#tm2#ocs#daily may 2024#the worlds worst take ur kid to work day#*telltale type game notif pops up* queen will remember that#shall not elaborate at this time draw ur own conclusions 👍#perhaps i did start on this at 1 am. my sleep schedule is So...#i am SLOWLY FIXING IT#the curse of being able to set my own schedule....#nyway i mixed my usual style with some of the painting style i did yesterday and that was a fun experiment#did not bother coloring the lineart like i do a lot of the time#bc ...these r supposed 2 be..sketches...#getting a little carried away X-X#i lIKE rendering th. i m having FUN
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i went to da hospital bc weed did nightmare shit to me (advanced)
#last night. i'm goo now but that took all day lol#y'know that reddit(?) story of the guy who gets hit by a car on his bike then lives out like a whole decade and gets a wife and kid#then notices the lighting of a lamp in his house is wrong and wakes up to find none of that decade happened#and he just like blacked out for a few minutes after getting hit on his bike.#i lived out 2 days‚ Died in that 2 day period‚ woke up to vague lucidity#then lived out a few years i think. but it was like some inception shit#everything was very abstract. at one point on the way to the hospital it was like an arcade game. 8-bit pixels 3rd person pov#like on the road. i saw the world like it was an xbox kinect. like it was just sticks. crt tv. newsprint#at one point everything was greyscale and i could see all the veins in rodan's face in highlighter yellow colour that was neat#nothing i saw was real but it was kind of layered to where i could vaguely tell if i was closest to reality#everytime i got close enough to reality i asked what time it was#it was very frustrating to spend like hours not close to reality and then i got lucid and i'd ask and it'd been like 5 minutes. KFMFNGNF#and apparently i was awake the whole time so that's fun#my weed nightmare my mindfuck. my beanfreak#if you will
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i am literally so hungry and yet i am like paralyzed in my seat. why can't i get up and go get food. why am i just sitting here while my stomach wallows in agony. i feel ill. jay be normal
#qktalks#be normal.#me when i can't take care of myself ??? girl just get up and go nothing is stopping u (it feels like the world is stopping me)#anyway sorry this started off as a weird vent post or whatever. u guys know what i miss? animal jam#i miss that game so much#i also played a lot of happy pets on facebook when i was little i've been genuinely considering making a new facebook just to play it again#but is it worth it. no. no is the answer to that#i remember when i played animal jam back when i was little and i finally got that one headdress accessory that was the craze back then#and my best friend at the time got so jealous abt it that they hacked into my account while i was asleep and traded it w their own account#and the next day i was like ''where did all my stuff go'' and they were like ''haha idk'' while wearing my fucking outfit#honestly that's rly hilarious. the fucking audacity#little me wasn't ballsy enough to go ''uhm i think the fuck not'' i was like just ''oh ......... okay :(''#but u bet ur ass if i was as confident back then as i am now ? i woulda maimed them#yes <3 over a video game. that's what kids do didn't u know <3#god i do miss happy pets tho#that game was so fun and silly. i deleted my facebook tho all my houses upon houses of pets r gone#u could have glowing tigers!!!!!#JUST GOOGLED HAPPY PETS THE GAME GOT SHUT DOWN . OHTHIS IS HORRIBLE#will be mourning this game all night. will be crying in the shower over it#<- acting like she's not in a depressive spiral and will absolutely NOT be showering#im holding a roblox funeral for happy pets who wants to join [has never once played roblox]#anyway weird topic-less rant over goodnight <3 to all my new followers yes i am slightly strange
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obviously gaius is my main man because i’m in love with him but i also can’t stress enough how important ricken is to me. i really relate to him in a lot of aspects and it feels like i’ve grown up with him in a way
#tactician's log#awakening#august of awakening#bc like i was 15 when i played for the first time and i personally think he’s 14-15 at the beginning of the game#and something about also being a kid who felt like she had something to prove just forged an incomparable bond between us.#trying to prove yourself and then getting a little overwhelmed in the attempt because you bit off too much is. smth i have experience with#i also relate to sumia in a lot of the same ways but to a lesser extent? bc she was technically older than me the first time i played#and being fans of both of them is fun in a different way from being a gaius girlie bc like. pretty much everyone likes gaius#but ricken is underappreciated and sumia has historically been a little bit. shall we say divisive (through NO fault of her own)#so its like. its me and my losers against the world. i love them both so much#this is like the 10th time ive posted about this or something but i really think about it often
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when i was little i was so bad at video games that whenever i played mario on my wii i would just die over and over again because i sucked so bad and eventually i discovered that luigi could beat levels for you if you died enough times so i just started dying over and over on purpose whenever i couldnt beat a level. which was most of them. and i played through the entire game like this all the way to the end
#dont know why im posting this just felt the need to share this information#the specific game im talking about is new super mario bros wii btw#there were like 4 levels max that i could actually beat and they were all in world 1 thats how bad i was#i think it would be fun to revisit it. see if i can beat it for real this time#anyway shocking lore drop for tonight i played more mario than sonic as a kid#and its not that i didnt like sonic or anything i did like sonic i just had easier access to mario stuff
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Re totk: I have not been more terrified of a video game since I was less than ten years old and I am LOVING it. It's nostalgic how convinced I am that they're gonna get me.
#Kid me: absolutely convinced the creepy statue is going to come to life and kill me and delete my save and destroy the in game world#Me: yeah lol that was fun times. Shame I'm too grown up to be so spooked by stuff I know isn't real and I can respawn anyway worst case.#Me playing totk: *making direct eye contact with the creepy statue* *fighting the nagging feeling that interacting with this thing at all#is going to unlock the bad ending and come alive and kill me and delete my save and destroy the in game world*#Feel like I've cursed link just by looking at it. 10/10 game design#Totk#Loz totk#loz tears of the kingdom#tears of the kingdom#the legend of zelda#legend of zelda#Ah to be young and playing oot and going to the well. Naive. Unknowing. *sees a shape in the distance of the underground* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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im going to sleep here in a bit but i just like. started thinking about outer wilds
#wind howls#you dont understand the grip this game has on me. it has all the very specific bits that i adore in a video game#the lore ? phenomenal. the gameplay ? fucking fantastic. it has 6 directional movement what with the spaceship but#it doesnt have any like. actual frame perfect timing necessities at all#no quick time event. it is a breeze to play through and doesnt require needing to be precise down to a milimeter#the art and design and everything ? wonderful. it goes against so many regular 3d video game rules in order to work#but it DOES. and it has a team of such loving devs who put in their absolute everything into this game#and probably some of the most kind and fun fans ive ever seen. since its a game that you advance by learning abt the world-#spoilers can completely ruin everything. but ive very rarely if at all seen fans try to ruin the experience for anyone else#its a game that is asking you to fall in love with the world its set in and my god does it do such a good job of doing that#sorry . i remembered that my boyfriend said he might play it this summer while i watch him nd it is one of the things i look forward 2 most#im not fuckin kidding when i say that it my favourite game in the whole wide world. if anyone reading this plays it please talk 2 me abt it#(or maybe dont. im so so insane about this game but i promise its for a reason i promise its good)
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misfits and magic has me smiling like you wouldn't believe. i'm enjoying myself so so so much
#dimension 20#helps that i'm currently DEEP back in my latent dnd mode#and i know they're playing kids on bikes the system doesn't matter i just am completely and totally obsessed with ttrpgs#and dnd 5e is the only system i fully know#but no i'm like. kicking my legs and squealing. i'm so happy. i love this so so much#okay like. there's special interests. which take up every like. free moment of my brain. and then there's whatever happens to me#whenever i'm obsessed with dnd#where my like? emotions? become suddenly and powerfully tied to like. what's literally a game#and like the thought of being unable to play it or other people not caring about it as much as me irrationally makes me way too upset#and i'm not even lying like. okay every activity i've ever done in my life that's fun? i can only do for some amount of time before i need#a break. cause i get bored. i like activity cycling basically.#i could play dnd forever. if i didn't have physical needs like bodily pain from using a phone or like. need for food and drink.#i would play dnd forever. non-stop. it's my number 1 favourite thing in the whole world forever.#i've never met anyone who likes it as much as me.#i enjoy dimension 20 but i'm also. burning with jealousy. probably the strongest jealousy i've ever felt in my life#people who get to play dnd for a job. make me want to tear something up with my teeth#i would trade every organ in my body for that#sorry for being deranged in the tags#and i like dming fine#(as the person who is the most passionate in any group abt the game dming is something i've done a half-decent amnt)#but being a player is my ideal#dnd
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I'm in such a Ben 10 fever mood as of late! And your art on crossover goodness is amazing and inspiring so thank you! 😍
i will never get over how FusionFall put those two together to be in a tutorial introduction, because they were both 'cool kids' of that era, but objectively Ben10 is a dorky overly dramatic cool kinda vibe while Numbuh 5 is just the coolest kid on the block but is chill about it vibe. they would indeed make a fun battle team-up
also why tf Ben just fistfights his way out of his battles when his watch aint working, use a bazooka or smth dude smh
#fusionfall#cartoon network#ben 10#codename: kids next door#ben tennyson#numbuh 5#abby lincoln#numbuh five#knd#codename knd#ben 10 alien force#ben 10 ultimate alien#ben 10 omniverse#is that an outfit redesign u see? yes. yes it is. im just having fun after remembering my delight for this game#now im brimming with ideas for outfits for my fav characters of this game#man if only i finished it in time for ff anniversary. that would have been cool lol. but i didnt even know it was anniversary! ;(#also just in case ITS NOT A SHIP its A FRIENDSHIP!!!! born on a battlefield for their world because they were thrown into a fight together#or more like ben is intimidated by this much younger than him knd agent because she is cooler than him and tries desperately to prove that#he is just as cool and abby is like: u might have saved universe several times and probably would have made a great knd operative but u#r such a dork mr ben 10. in other words ben wont survive the burns because abby would see through him in a second
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i have a crush on someone i met a month and a half ago who i only saw for a week then that i'm seeing again for a week now and that i'm gonna see for four more weeks from now until june this is what life is all about
#and like i say: brf slt#i hadn't had a CRUSH on someone in literal years. like it was bad for me and this isn't even bc i'm bored i'm just attracted to them. yay!#you have to talk to people to like people i'm finding. because i didn't notice that i was charmed until i was charmed by the talking#the way we met (lmao) is i'm studying to be a teacher. and they work in the middle school i spend a few weeks at this school year#but like that person is not a teacher they work there like when kids don't have class they'll be in a classroom doing their homework or#whatever and they would be the one like telling them to not make any noise#amongst other things#idk if there's a word for that in english it's a very specific job. and anyway. we had to go like where these people work like the specific#part of the school the last time we were there (me and the girl i'm studying with who's with me when i'm...at this middle school. it's like#an internship but it feels weird to call it an internship. but that's what it is) and they were like come see us again from 4 to 5 later#we'll do *this* and we played board games with the kids that were there and that probably sounds weird but it was very fun and funny and#that's when i was like waittttt. and then i looked for them on social media at midnight#i kind of didn't think about them once from six weeks ago to monday but on monday i was like omg i'm gonna see my crush again😁 and then i#did on tuesday and we had a fun interaction and everything because we're bffs. anyway. this is great#when i didn't see them on monday i was like omg what if they quit😔 but they hadn't.#it's just the right amount for it to be fun because like i don't know this person and i won't know them because i won't see them again#until march and after that until may but like it's fun for the weeks i do see them. saw them for 3 minutes on tuesday and like 25 today#it's a job YOUNG PEOPLE do it's not like an old person😭 we're around thesame age. i actually applied to a job like that 3 years ago but#i cried during the interview because i'm crazy like that. i had 2 interviews at 2 different high schools and i didn't cry during the#second interview but i still didn't get the job. lol. but as i was saying young person and i feel like we would genuinely get along like#in an ideal world we would all have drinks together like with my friends and everyone and we would actually hang out. me saying that#instead of like in an ideal world we would: date is you can't even dream a whole dream can you coded😭😭 but like. whatever
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