#fucking friends assholes

[dakota4]

The moral of the story is that you realize at the end of the fucking day, you really have no fucking friends because the people you call your friends are okay with having fun without you.

But at this stage, I really don’t fucking care no more.

[azucaray]

The expendable likes to ruin a warm moment

[vaguely-concerned]

'varric's vibe when you pick the 'I'm worried' option after he asks you how you feel about having solas in your head is so fucking funny. the very careful 'so, uh, just... out of casual interest why -- why aren't you putting wards on yourself and your mind to keep him out, and incidentally exactly how might you do it if you did. no reason why I'm asking just. curious. I have no stance on this' probing of it all (that should be the giveaway in itself, really, in hindsight I think real varric would be a lot more freaked out on rook's behalf about this even if he might still have reached the conclusion that the connection to solas was worth the risk, he's got kirkwall blood magic trauma to fill a telephone catalogue). that and the '>:) then I see you've made a choice (so this is basically a little bit on you now, you got fairly outsmarted etc., I don't have to feel as guilty thank you for having youthful hubris that will be your undoing so I can feel less bad about my role in it). honestly if anything I'm doubling down on my previous 'mind!varric is directly controlled by solas the majority of the time and rook's mind is mostly a collaborateur' post. this conversation is transparently solas gathering intel and giving you the 101 on leadership while you're building a small focused rebel force.

in solas' defense... this whole situation is very very funny in an extremely dark kind of way he is nothing if not on brand. the stuff he says about himself in this conversation is like. he's both reading himself for filth AND he can't read all of a sudden he can't uh......... he has plenty of self-insight (a single flower with blackened petals) and it helps him exactly not at all in breaking his patterns lmao

also it makes the relationship between solas and rook so. so much. what an insane intimacy in grieving for someone so much you both conspire to raise him from the dead together, just for a little while, because neither of you can bear to let go. what a violation in being the only knowing party in that. solas can hear rook following through on relaying his apology to 'varric' no matter what else they think of him. and he still does what he does to them in the end. he's feeding them affection (some of it even real eventually, I think, he clearly respects rook as a pure agent of chaos on some level and has some incredulous amused fondness for them no matter how you end up in your relationship with him) and confidence with one hand, and readying a knife in the other the whole time. solas my love my friend my genuine darling I think I will have to strangle you unfortunately

[miyamiwu]

How to say “I love you” in Blue Lock

I don’t really want to play soccer, but being with you isn’t a pain, so it’s fine.

Now that I can fight without you, being with you is even more fun

And then there’s this asshole...

I made it this far because of you. Since you allowed me to play soccer freely, I’ve grown this strong on Bastard München. But I can’t climb any higher that way. I figured that out in this match, I no longer need the freedom you give me. Forget about me, Ness. Find yourself a new king. It’s easier for me to live in restriction.

[adharastarlight]

sirius: i love you, bro

james: bro :( i love you

*meanwhile*

reg: youre a goddamn wanker

rem: and youre a fucking bastard

[grand-line-shenanigans]

You made a mistake, Murderbot, a really bad mistake. How the hell was I supposed to know there were transports sentient enough to be mean?

[zivazivc]

my brainrot about these two can be measured in liters

[not-kayvalencourt]

Let's all put on our thinking caps and see that there is no actual evidence that iskall didn't do anything but his own word. There is, however, massive amounts of evidence that he did.

If you follow me and support iskall (or stress), unfollow me. The bullshit tantrum he just had and the amount of people there are supporting him is actually disgusting. If you genuinely believe him, you need to look up manipulation tactics. He is going to use his fame to get people to trust him, just like he did to his victims.

[bitchapalooza]

Gosha: I found true happiness with the woman of my dreams. We're starting a family together which was first thought impossible.

Yahya: But what about ME!? Me! Me! Me!

[inkskinned]

am i gonna put you in the book acknowledgements am i gonna be able to say your name without flinching am i ever gonna get a word in edgewise am i ever gonna recover the time i spent with you. computer virus kid; i arrived in your life already begging to be let in. somehow insecure i could even be your friend. like you had a line outside the door and we were all shifting our weight, begging.

you're so fucking good at that - at making people feel like they need to earn you, like you're a commodity none of us can afford. no kindness or careful communication could work on you - you were so good at just going-ghost, about deciding someone just wasn't cool-enough. something about that is super ironic. even the parts of it that weren't romantic felt like a romance book. i wanted you to like me so badly i scrubbed myself clean just so you'd spare me - what. your favor? a look?

okay okay okay. it's just a friendship - if it was even true that we were friends, if you even saw me as someone you trusted. on reddit someone would tell me girl literally just cut her out of your life, it's not that difficult. even i was aware of how fucked up the whole situation was. like, why the fuck do i even care about your approval? you're like, not even that fun to be around. you are often a little bit cruel.

but for almost four years of my life, i thought i had found someone like me. somebody who liked the same things i do. someone who liked to read and who liked making jokes with esoteric references and who spent maybe too much time on the internet and who was absolutely a little bit pretentious. i don't know, something about that was powerful and addictive.

i keep thinking about our last conversation. about how i said - okay, enough is enough. you pushed me too far, you really hurt my feelings.

and how you laughed and said - you think you're the victim?

[mamawasatesttube]

coming out as boring or whatever but i must admit. i don't actually find boomer-sitcom-esque "i hate my wife"/"my partner is annoying and naggy"/"its cute and quirky to shit on my partner" jokes funny even if you make them gay. sorry. but its my truth.

[old-fandom]

HELLO! I HAVE AN ESTABLISHED TEEN STANCEST IDEA!

Idk what I would call this but basically, it's "Ford is part of a DD&MD group with a bunch of other asshole losers who basically use Ford for his basement and Stan is the stupid but hot twin brother that the guys all talk made shit about both sexually and bullying wise. Ford is pissed about it."

Basically, Ford is invited into a group at high school with a bunch of other outcast losers who decide to let Ford join because he has a basement they can use to play. They used the play at another guys house but their mom kicked them out after they broke one of her coffee tables wrestling over a dice roll. Ford, for the first time, finally has a group of guys that he could call his friends. These "friends" are assholes. They're comic book snobs and misogynistic white knights and anti-deodorant wearing teenager boys. Think incel but less "I want to kill women" and more "I am smarter than everyone here due to my impressive and ultra rare card binder and everyone else is a poser if you don't know this trivia fact!" But none the less, Ford is accepted into the fold. He's able to actually play the game, or at least, be DM, which he doesn't mind! In fact, he likes being in charge. He's still a little shy but he's slowly cracking out of his shell, being less cagey and more open with jabbing back at the others taunts and even being able to continue the flow of conversation effortlessly. He's able to be nerdly aggressive where his threats, his taunts, his nerdy accomplishments that aren't academic are recognized and envied over. It kind of works for the group and Ford is happy.

Except for one thing.

They all have a thing for Stanley.

And Ford hates that they have a thing for Stanley.

Stanley is perfectly happy with Ford having a friend group, especially one that lets him nerd out to the max. He usually doesn't bother them when they're over, either because he doesn't want to be around that much nerdiness or because the smell shuns him away. But this doesn't mean he hasn't gone down there before.

The first time he went down there, it was to tell Ford that Ma wanted him to take a look at the telephone before he went to bed. She thinks one of the wires is loose again and he might need to fix it. Ford says he will and Stan leaves. That's when the comments start up.

They start jaunting about his wit, asking Ford what it's like to have a dumb jock for a brother. Ford defends Stan, saying he's more than just a dumb jock. In fact, he's not really a jock at all, he just likes boxing. But it doesn't stop the conversation. They start sharing stories about Stans exploits around school, whether it be one of his infamous fights with the Cramplter gang or him being so atrociously stupid in class that the teacher walked out. It finally breaks off once someone rolls a Nat 20 and the campaign continues.

But it doesn't stop completely.

Every time Stanly comes down for something, either to tell Ford something, bring the group snacks that their Ma made for them (swiping one for himself), grabbing something for his Pa to sell, or really anything, the group always starts talking about Stanley. And it makes Ford blood boil. He'll defend him alright, and he'll make their campaign a fucking nightmare for everything they've said, but he's scared to really do something. This is the first friend group he's ever had and he doesn't wanna lose it, even though something in him tells him that he'd be better off without them talking shit about Stanley every time he comes down.

Then the faithful day happens when Stan comes down after a shower, no shirt on, hair wet, wearing a part of dolphin shorts as it's the middle of summer. He's down there grabbing a drink from Ford's DD&MD group snack tray. They took the last of the Pit Cola and he'd be damned if he didn't get one. So he does and leaves without really saying anything, unaware of the eyes staring at him all the way.

Ford braces himself for the onslaught of his brother but nothing. The group continues the game like nothing happened. And Ford is excited because maybe they've finally gotten it together, seen that Stan really isn't just those things, he is so much more. He's kind hearted and compassionate, he's artistic and business smart, he's hands on and crafty, he's strong and hunky and good looking and so so sexy and - Ford has to shake his head. Now is not the time to get a boner.

Ford's Ma calls him in the middle of the game for something and he has to leave them for a second. When he comes back and over hears the group talking about Stan but it's not about how stupid he looks - it's about how slutty he is. He stops on the stairs and listens in.

He hears them make incredibly inappropriate remarks about his brother, about what he must look like on his knees, wishing that they put the drinks on the ground so he would have to bend all the way over in those shorts to get it, that if it weren't for his body, he'd be a waste of air. They joke about having sex with them, calling him slurs, doing things to him that Ford knows first hand Stan does not like to do. They talk about his chub, how they mock him for being fat, but hey, at least he has nice tits. They go on and on about it, unaware of the simmering Ford up the stairs. After hearing enough, Ford finally comes down, making them all unaware that he had been listening in on them for 10 minutes.

That session becomes the hardest, most brutal session, where Ford successfully kills all of their characters off. The guys get pissed at Ford, saying he did that shit on purpose, and Ford answers back that they're lucky it was only their characters he killed off and not the real people behind them, especially after those comments. They get into a fight, the guys saying that Ford shouldn't be wasting his time defending a stupid whore like Stanley, he'd only leave and hold back Ford. Ford finally snaps when one the guys mentions how easy it would be to get with Stanley, no matter what.

Ford ends up fist fighting the guys, beating the shit out of each other, breaking and ruining their game, destroying their papers and character sheets and models. His Pa ends up coming down stairs after hearing the commotion and kicks the guys out, telling them they aren't welcome back until they can pay for the broken table. They scramble and Ford is given a talking to about picking better people to hangout with and to clean up the mess.

Ford goes down stairs to find Stan already down there, going over the mess, still in his shorts and no shirt. Ford, still high on adrenaline, runs smack dab into Stanley, pushing him up against the wall and making out with him. Stan has no idea what spurred him on though he does have an inkling. He pushes Ford back just enough to ask him about the fight, seeing how Ford does have bruises on his knuckles.

Ford tells him it wasn't important, that they weren't all that much fun anyway, he'd rather spend his time with Stanley anyway. Stanley doesn't protest too much, and they end up having sex in the basement before cleaning up the mess.

Later that night, Ford does properly take Stan to bed, making love to him and showering him in praise and acceptance. Stan lets him.

He knew going down their in those shorts would cause a stir, he just didn't know it would go so far into his favor.

[psymachine]

post-macdennis reveal episode in the same vein as "the gang spies like u.s." where mac and dennis get tired of fighting and decide to look for a third partner for casual sex so they can both bottom get what they want. except they have a hard time finding a guy they're a. both attracted to and b. neither of them are jealous of, so they keep sabotaging/scaring away each candidate.

meanwhile, charlie sees them sneaking around to screen all these guys and thinks they're trying to replace him with another gay friend since they're both gay now. a confused confrontation ensues where he essentially re-applies to be their friend by bringing up all the weird shit they've done together over the last 30 years and insisting he can fulfill all of their needs even though he's not also gay.

dennis and mac misunderstanding this and freaking out while considering whether they should/want to just fuck charlie until everything finally blows up.

[galehowl]

in the darkest night, guiding stars

Some rambling about Tailmon's and Caedemon's complicated relationship in Aurora below~

Tailmon and Caedemon are two of some of the oldest Digimon aligned with both their own and mankind in Aurora, and their relationship goes far back to the very genesis of the Digital World.

As Huanglongmon's creations and members of the Archangels, both of them served them and the four Great Beasts as guardians of their world, alongside the other eight of their kind. For thousands of years, they were the guiding light for all the other Digimon to look up to, until Lucemon's betrayal, and the other six Archangels siding with him. Having discovered what would later become known as the Dark Area - an eldritch, mysterious and volatile dimension existing apart from the Digital and human worlds, yet intertwined with them - he chose to keep it secret, and, in time, his own desires, made worse by the influence of the Area, made him turn against his world and creators. The six others that succumbed to it all the same chose to follow their leader, and nearly laid waste to the Digital World by breaching the dimensional walls and unleashing the Area upon it, but were ultimately stopped by the remaining three Archangels, the world's inhabitants, and Huanglongmon's ultimate sacrifice to seal the Dark Area away, along with the traitors.

Ophanimon perished in those battles, but was reborn in the far future, though without memories of her past.

It was the actions of mankind that called her to action once more, and what awakened Caedemon from his eternal slumber deep within the Dark Area. It was when humans, upon discovering its existence, breached it in an attempt to take control of its powers and Caedemon himself - and sealed the fate of both worlds.

Caedemon, like his brethren, was never meant to be awakened, and Tailmon was mortified upon eventually figuring out the identity of the decaying beast. In her eyes, rightfully, not only was he a traitor, but also even alone a serious danger to both worlds, having become part of the Dark Area itself, but he was also absolutely not fit to be a Tamer's Digimon, especially to a child.

Caedemon initially also did little to soothe her concerns, even with her disdain and suspicions for him obvious, as he exhibited a selfish, troubled and nihilistic personality, caring little for their own kind, and consistently questioning whether or not humanity is even worth saving, with all they've learned about it - a big contrast to her more optimistic outlook on things, a love for all living beings, and a desire to seek out good in everyone, even to the detriment of herself and others.

Though they do eventually mend their once broken friendship, it takes a long time for things to get better, and a lot of change ( namely for Caedemon ) for them to find a way to complement each other in working together - two beings plucked from past long gone - to guide both worlds into a better future.

[okkennymay]

Commission for @xxmischieflovesxx (aww man why wont it let me @ you??)

Listen I know the vast majority of what i post is commissions, but a mans gotta keep a roof over his head one way or another 9w9"

At least I get a lot of really fun ones!~ 💖

Ahhh Dan under house arrest by Clockwork, his "warden" a demon, and his attempts at intimidation in that last panel were most certainly futile.

[two-entire-bits]

I have a confession. I do not care for the soc boys. I'm sure they have very interesting character traits and lore the actors and fandom have come up with and that is so fun and great and I know none of it and I am perfectly content with that. Shout out to all my mutuals who love the soc boys I hope you are having fun with your Ken dolls but I will not be joining you. keep slaying.