#fuckin adhd
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cryolophosaurus ellioti, a large theropod from early jurassic antarctica
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#i started this like 5 months ago lmao#fuckin adhd#cryolophosaurus#cryolophosaurus ellioti#neotheropod#dinosaur#dinosaurs#theropod#theropod dinosaur#theropoda#paleontology#jurassic#jurassic period#prehistoric animals#early jurassic#paleoblr#paleoart#paleo illustration#dinosaur art#dino art#my art#dinosaur reconstruction#added protofeathers bc i hate myself
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My aunt when my disability is disabling me in not a stereotypical way: 😧😠 "Why don't you just [thing I'm limited in because disability]! I also have [disability] and I don't struggle with this at all! You're just a lazy child!"
#help#She claims she has adhd too#But won't accept that my executive dysfunction is way stronger than hers#And that my adhd is not just I can't focus#I can focus for a short time#but it's exhausting#And draining#fuckin adhd#adhd#actually adhd#adhd problems#neurodivergent#neurodivergency#adhd things#I can sit still#But my brain can't and that's what's distracting me#And my meds are classified as almost-drugs and I don't like taking them#But I currently still depend on them because of german school system#And anyway they're just making my brain quieter#Which also impacts my thinking ability
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Me but I'm overwhelmed by my tasks so I can't do anything
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Don't you hate when the ADHD paralysis gets so bad you're like,
"Oh shit I'm thirsty. I'm really thirsty. When was the last time I drank water? My water bottle is right there, I should drink water"
AND THEN YOU DON'T
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i am a slave to deadline pressure and i mcfuckin hate it
#i have literally had 3 years to finish this shit#i have done so much bullshit other than this thing i need to do in order to graduate#i have taken so many classes and done well#won awards#learned a new fuckin language and lived in the country for a summer#and yet i still haven't written this fucking paper i want to peel my skin off what is wrong with me#there are no words to express how disappointed i am in myself#i will stay up all night to write this bc that is the only way it will get done#fuckin adhd#i'm getting angry emails about finishing it#and the sad thing is that they make me feel guilty#and i become paralyzed and unable to do shit if i feel guilty about it#aaaaaaAAAAAA#i want to scream into the void#i will literally be so much less stressed when i finish this#a huge weight will be lifted off my shoulders#and yet#i sit here#like a fucking dumbass#end rant
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undiagnosed adhd eddie who cries the first time steve says ‘i love you.’
bad tears. tears of dread.
steve says ‘i love you’ and eddie has to admit that he’s terrified to let himself love steve back, because it means he might stop loving him some day and he can’t bear to do that to him.
and steve looks at him with those sweet, sad eyes, a confused little dip to his brow as he asks, “so just- don’t stop then?”
and eddie doesn’t have the word ‘hyperfixation’ in his back pocket, doesn’t have the language to explain his faulty wiring, but he tries. tries to tell him how he can love something for days, weeks, month, years — an all-consuming, better-than-any-drug overwhelming obsession for the thing — and then wake up one day and feel nothing. like his emotions are the boards of a rickety wooden bridge swinging high over a ravine, and at any moment a plank could drop out from under his feet and leave him scrambling for purchase.
and steve just cups his face until he’s done talking and then he tells him that there’s a difference between loving things and loving people, and the difference is that one of them is a bridge you come across and hope it holds, and the other is a bridge you build together with your bare hands.
#steddie#steddie hcs#steddie drabble#(throws glitter)#i can’t fuckin sleep so have whatever this is#steve harrington#eddie munson#eddie munson has adhd
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Another day of “do I have adhd, or autism, or both, or do I just spend too much time on the websites that categorize all thoughts and behaviors as symptoms of some type of neurodivergence”
#posts will be like signs u may be autistic: you have thoughts and feelings sometimes and sometimes you don't. you have a favorite tv show.#you eat a food. you DON'T eat a food <-- EXTRA autistic. you see a sight you hear a sound. consider yourself diagnosed.#and then an identical post abt adhd.#sergle.txt#don't fuckin get me STAHTED on the surface-level-understanding-of-ADHD-tiktoks#who knows. at any rate I will not be putting any effort into finding out
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Mmmmmmm .. pepsicola.
#pepsicola#dave strider#john egbert#homestuck#i am thoroughly aware that my shift from tma to homestuck is the whiplash of the century#like believe me i didnt think my life would go like this either#but the adhd says stupid 2009 webcomic gives serotonin#this fuckin thing is about to display just how much of a shameless multishipper i am#expect cherrypepsicola#my art#doodle page#hammertime#johndave#davejohn
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i got 🔥💥fired💥🔥
bluh bluh chronically fatigued aroace trans dude with audhd osdd etc etc
today i learned the hospital i worked at doesnt give sick days and staying home with a 101 degree fever gets you written up. fucking crazy right its a hospital
ignore how wrinkled that shit is i crumpled it into a ball out of stress lmao. anyway
straight to it: i just lost my benefits a month before i get to pay $17k in college tuition ‼️‼️💯💯 WHEEE
ik this is tumblr were all broke so i get it dont feel pressured but if anyone wouldge like to perhaps give me a dollar or something that would be swagful. or reblog thats also good
venmeaux: @ // kjohnson626
zelle: dm me ill give you my email
peighpal (IGNORE deadname): @ // turntechqodhcad
#donations#mutual aid#transgender#trans#lgbt+#autism#neurodivergent#adhd#fuckin do not like the feeling of making this post#hope i get to delete this after a bit. im already trying to appeal this#and im updating my resume so i can start applying other places asap#but like. just for now#since im probably gonna have to start all over with the benefits eligibility#man i JUST hit my one year mark. fucking wild#colored text
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Pokeymon
@ask-willowleafeon @ask-shiny-umbreon
#fuckkkk pokeask nostalgia got me by the throat. I can’t do this again Im not strong enough (does it anyway)#drawing eeveelutions is always fun Theyre so shaped. theyre up there on fav pokemon to draw right next to dratini. and maybe shinx#these two stick out to me in my mind just cause like. their designs are so good it kind of squishes my brain the right ways#I never got to draw Percy for an ask or anything but he is. very creature#and willow of course I have a soft spot for. shes so sweet and gentle uuhghhgghhhh I love her#fuck dude .maybe I will come back adhd be damned. I dont fuckin know. really tempting rn#I tell myself that but deep down I know I suck at roleplay. but maybe I’ll do it. but I suck at roleplay. etc#btw leafeon should be allowed to be autumn coloured without being shiny. it would fix me. I just want Some Guy dressed like a maple leaf#without the awe of being a 1/1000 chance. I don’t CAREEEEE gimme the crunchy red leaveeeesss#I also wanna draw Gardevoir with a barn owl face. and leafeon with seaweed leaves#aaahhhhggghhhhh clenches my fists#pokemon#pokemon ask blog#pokeask#others oc#ask-willowleafeon#ask-shiny-umbreon#Percy umbreon#willow leafeon#myart#my art#pokemon oc
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G1 Warpath
#maccadam#transformers#poll#smash or pass#request#g1#warpath#this fucking dude. let me tell you.#first tf show ive ever watched for more than a third of an episode when i was a youngin was tfa. that was my only basis for warpath's vibe#emo. low whisoery voice. trying to be batman. bitching about lousy fuckin draft dodgers.#and then i see him in g1 and im expecting that enery. because SURELY. an autobot tank in blood red?#SURELY hes an edgelord. probably of the quiet variety bc we already have cliffjumper#and then i am met with a guy who has undiagnosed adhd and is possibly always a little drunk.#and my wig is on the fucking floor. girl who is this?!?! that is a fascinating creature.#i was expecting 'violence 💀👹💥🔥👿' and i got 'Violence!! ✨💖🎶🎉🤪'#FASCINATING creature
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#columbo#season 4#negative reaction#god dude look at the road ONCE#PLEASE#fuckin tiny idiot choking to death on actual unmedicated adhd. a dog barking 3 towns away would cause him to crash
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Harrow meeting Kiriona:
hmm
HMMMM
#yall have fuckin BROKEN me#taking pictures of grills in front of the lowes like#“oh shes probably taking a picture for father's day gift inspiration”#jokes on THEM#my dad is DEAD#and this is a DEEPLY SPECIFIC IN JOKE for a NICHE BOOK SERIES#the locked tomb#tlt#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#nona the ninth#griddlehark#gideon nav#harrowhark nonagesimus#the locked tomb series#nona the ninth spoilers#ntn spoilers#also its fine my dad is dead#he would love being used in a joke#i scheduled this because ADHD
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I just got off a 4+ hour Instagram hyper fixation just because my roommate walked in and then I realized I legit had ten minutes to read chapter 2 of the textbook and submit a discussion question
I did, in fact, read the introduction paragraph yesterday and had notes for it so I pulled some random ass question out of my ass submitted the post with legit thirty seconds left
Then I even did the quiz based off chapter one and two for the same class in six minutes (this is due tomorrow thou) without reading any other anything from chapter 2 and got a 4/5
It was a select all too so I was robbed
I was more productive in fifteen minutes because of roommate power than in the last five hours
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I can't help it so I'm going on a mini rant about one singular line from Light because I'm so incredibly normal about it.
The line by Whole "This human you're being" has so much going on with it that means sm to me & I wish was discussed more.
It can mean, to Heart & Mind, that 1. you shouldn't treat the other half as something below a human being. Heart talking about how cold & uncaring Mind is. A madman thats turning whole into something he shouldn't be. Mind saying that Heart is something weaker than a human. A vile creature that should be left out or thrown away. Or how both their views on Soul are either something to control/that has control and not as a being that's a part of themselves/Whole. Not seeing it as a being with its own thoughts & identity [for the first half of Cacophony at least].
Whole stating that they're all just as important & human as the other and they shouldn't view them as something other than that.
But 2. Whole telling them that they should not only view the other as human but themselves as well.
While yes they do insult the other frequently, they also insult themself a fair bit as well. Mind viewing himself as a machine, something thats supposed to be cold & uncaring. Always having to be right about everything and never fail, otherwise he himself is a failure. Heart calling himself weak & vile. Overly emotional about everything; getting too heated in an argument, being too unhappy with life or himself in general to the point where it all seems too much care for and so he flips to becoming apathetic. Thinking those things make him fail at everything and only make things worse.
Or Soul having trouble seeing himself as something that has its own identity. His own Heart & Mind [and in turn his own head] fighting about what they should be. How they should act or deal with things and how they shouldn't. What roles they're all supposed to fit into. All to the point where Soul doesn't know what its supposed to do anymore or how to be anything which leads him to the Tridential Regicide answer.
And 3. Despite everything mentioned before, all three of them [together or apart] are being Human. That despite the Cacophony they're in, how likely it can happen again & loop back over, they'll still be human no matter what. That it just comes with being human. How they shouldn't strive to never have failures or have ups & downs or to be something others want them to be. That what they are already is enough & that they'll get outta Cacophony permanently one day and they can finally stay whole.
I frickin love Light overall but GOD that line kills me everytime I hear it. Especially when connecting heavily to the album and its characters or ideas it just hits hard & is so nice to hear.
Man I just typed 5½ paragraphs over ONE (1) singular line of a song that I've listed to for over a year and I still will never ever be normal about it.
#i fuckin love Light man#i still tear up over that part sometimes#its just......augh i cant#im so normal about this bitches(affectionate)#bro im so tempted to make a 100 page essay over Vol. 1 alone & go over every song#if my adhd allowed me i would#my adhd & autism fight over what i do for multiple hours straight#my own heart & mind/j#chonny jash#moss post#moss rants
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it's always fun to learn about your conditions online. For example, ADHD can hijack your brain into being a plagiarist (James Somerton) and/or go on racist rampages (Cait Corrain)
so glad they get to spread the word about these totally real side effects <3
#shitpost#adhd#james somerton#cait corrain#i love being represented by awful people#using a real disability as a cover#fuckin scummy
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